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unfolded73 · 4 years

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My Heartbeat Shows the Fear (3/4) - schitt’s creek ff

Summary: A canon divergent story: Patrick gets into a car accident and it brings the Brewers to town sooner.

Notes: This fic will be posted in 4 chapters, every other day. There is some description of injuries, but nothing too graphic or life-threatening.

The title is from “Overkill” by Colin Hay, which thanks to the show Scrubs puts me in mind of hospitals.

Thank you to Amanita_Fierce for putting so much time and thought into betaing this fic - you made it so, so much better. And thanks also to @high-seas-swan for some helpful suggestions, particularly on that one scene that I tore apart and rewrote.

Rated Teen, this chapter 4390 words. (ao3)

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2

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Chapter 3

“Well, you look like shit,” Stevie said as she and David walked into his hospital room Wednesday morning.

“Thanks,” Patrick said as David took advantage of his parents’ absence to lean over and kiss him.

“Did you sleep okay?” David asked, pulling up a chair to sit close. Patrick reached for David’s hand, taking it and squeezing it.

“Not really.” He felt terrible, but it was hard to tell if that was because of the constant aching pain coming from his arm and torso.

“So Alexis and Ted were able to get onto the lot where your car was towed and they found your phone,” David said, pulling a phone with a cracked screen out of his pocket. “We’ll have to plug it in to see if it still works,” he said as he grabbed Patrick’s charger out of the duffel bag and plugged the phone in.

“What about the merchandise?” Patrick asked.

David grimaced. “There were a lot of broken bottles. They saved what they could.”

“Let the vendors know that we’ll pay them for the lost merchandise. It should be covered by our insurance,” Patrick said, shifting his body and wincing at the pain in his side. “We’ll have to file a claim.”

“Okay, but I don’t want you to worry about that right now,” David said, leaning over and nuzzling against Patrick’s cheek. It felt like David was trying to absorb as much physical affection as he could while he had the opportunity.

“So what did your arm look like before, was it really gross?” asked Stevie from her spot leaning against the wall.

“Don’t answer that,” David warned. “Are you in a lot of pain?”

“It’s a little better. And I’ve managed to walk to the bathroom to pee without passing out, so that’s a big accomplishment.”

David laughed. “I’m so proud.” He let go of Patrick’s hand and stroked up and down his right arm affectionately.

“I assume my parents got settled in okay?”

“Oh yeah,” Stevie said, “we were going to talk about the lube—”

“No, we weren’t,” David said quickly, then in explanation to Patrick, he added, “Stevie went over and scrubbed the apartment of evidence of our relationship yesterday before your parents got there.”

Patrick’s stomach sank. Now his cowardice had not only hurt David, but had forced their friends to sneak around like they were in a farce. “Thanks, Stevie.”

“And I told my family not to say anything if they ran into your parents in town. Although they can’t really be relied on at all not to open their big mouths, so really it’s a bit of a crap shoot. But I told your parents that the food at the café was terrible, which wasn’t even a lie, so hopefully they won’t go there.”

Patrick imagined Johnny Rose stumbling through a conversation with his parents and revealing the nature of David and Patrick’s relationship. It was a terrifying idea, although he had to admit that a tiny part of him wanted it to happen. At least it would save him from having to break the news.

He really needed to tell his parents before this went on any longer.

“I’ll tell my parents when they get here this morning,” Patrick blurted out.

David grimaced. “You don’t have to rush, honey,” he said, still stroking his arm.

“No, David, this isn’t fair to you. I—”

“Good morning!” And there his parents were, walking into the room. David flinched back, his hand dropping from Patrick’s arm.

“We didn’t know you’d have visitors already so early,” Marcy said warmly, looking back and forth between David and Stevie.

“Yeah, we thought we’d stop in before I have to open the store,” David said as if a visit to the hospital didn’t require almost an hour and a half of driving.

“Should I point out that you’re already late opening the store?” Patrick gave him a teasing smirk.

“Everyone in town has heard about your car accident; I’m sure they’ll be forgiving,” David said.

“It’s good to see you again, Stevie,” Clint said, and Stevie gave him an awkward little wave.

“You guys met already?” Patrick asked.

“Yes, we met at your wonderful store, dear,” Marcy said.

“I gave your parents a quick tour of the store yesterday afternoon before they drove over to Brebner’s. I told them our fresh vegetables were much better,” David added.

“You were right,” Clint said.

It all felt like it was spinning out of his control, if it ever had been in his control — while Patrick lay helpless in his hospital bed, David and Stevie were spending time with his parents. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. He was supposed to have told them about his relationship with David, and they were supposed to see the truth of his life in Schitt’s Creek. He was supposed to have given them a tour of the store. They were supposed to see how settled and happy he was in the town with the people that knew him as half of ‘David and Patrick.’ Instead they were getting this incomplete, false version of him.

“David, I need to get back to the motel soon,” Stevie said, and David stood up. Patrick felt an urge to grab for his hand, to stop him from leaving. Instead he lay there, paralyzed by doubt.

A nurse came in then. “Goodness, you’re very popular this morning, Patrick,” she said, picking up his chart and making some notes from the screens behind his head.

“I’ll meet you in the lobby?” Stevie said to David, and then patted Patrick’s foot. “Feel better,” she said before disappearing from the room.

“You’re scheduled for blood work today, so I’m here to steal some blood,” said the nurse. Her name was Janice, Patrick remembered; she’d been on duty before. She pulled some tubes out of her pocket and lined them up on the table.

“Stevie seems nice,” Marcy said. ‘And she’s very pretty.”

“Marcy,” Clint said, a warning tone in his voice.

“What? I’m just saying.”

“No, you’re matchmaking,” Clint replied.

As she tightened the rubber band around his bicep and skillfully inserted the needle into his arm, Janice raised her eyebrows at Patrick, cut her eyes over to David, and then tilted her head almost imperceptibly toward Patrick’s parents. Her meaning was as clear as if she’d spoken out loud — they don’t know David is your boyfriend? Patrick shook his head as the first tube filled with blood. No, they don’t know. Janice nodded.

“I’m not matchmaking,” Marcy said. “But you can’t blame me for wanting to see Patrick happy in a relationship.” Patrick glanced at David, but David was studying his nails, his face carefully blank. Whether he was averting his gaze to avoid seeing blood or to avoid this conversation, Patrick wasn’t certain.

“Oh, don’t worry, Patrick’s having a torrid affair with most of the nurses on staff, the heartbreaker,” Janice said with a conspiratorial wink.

His parents laughed, and his mother dropped her line of inquiry. Thank you, Patrick mouthed to Janice, who smirked.

Once the four vacutainer tubes were filled, Janice checked his chart again. “Whoops, forgot to record your temperature.” She pulled out a thermometer and put it under Patrick’s tongue, waiting for the beep before reading the number.

“38.1,” she said, clucking her tongue. “You’re running a bit of a fever today, Patrick.”

“What does that mean?” David asked.

“Could be nothing — patients get unexplained fevers in hospitals all the time — but we want to rule out an infection stemming from his forearm fracture. I’ll page Dr. Barnes.” She patted Patrick’s hand and left the room.

His mother took Janice’s place, putting her hand on his forehead. “You do feel warm. Would you like me to get a wet cloth for your head?”

“No, Mom. I’m fine,” Patrick sighed as he shut his eyes. No wonder he was feeling so shitty.

“I’m sorry about before,” she said. “I know you told us that you weren’t seeing anyone, but I guess deep down I was hoping to meet a girlfriend. You’re such a catch, sweetheart.”

Patrick opened his eyes and met David’s. He could tell them now, but the fever was making him feel like he wanted to sleep for a thousand years. “There’s no girlfriend,” he said.

“Not in all the time you’ve lived here?” Marcy asked.

Patrick shook his head, still looking at David. He just needed to say it. I’m gay. There isn’t ever going to be a girlfriend. There’s David, who I think might be the love of my life.

He opened his mouth, and Dr. Barnes came through the door.

“Patrick, what’s this fever nonsense?” she chided jokingly. “Didn’t I teach you better than that?”

Chuckling weakly, Patrick tried to communicate to David with his eyes that he’d been on the verge of coming out, if only his doctor didn’t have the worst imaginable timing.

Dr. Barnes probed and prodded him, removing the splint from his arm long enough to unwrap the bandages and examine it. The movement was excruciating, but Patrick tried not to show the pain on his face in front of David and his parents. David was averting his eyes again anyway to avoid seeing Patrick’s injury.

“Still no sign of infection from the wound, so I think this is just a run-of-the-mill fever,” she said as she replaced the bandages and the splint. “But we can’t take any chances, so we’ll have to keep you at least one more night for observation.”

Patrick sighed in frustration. He really wanted to go home. He desperately wanted to be in his own bed being held by his boyfriend, even if having David moving around next to him in the bed would make his injuries more painful. He didn’t care.

“I know, it sucks. But infections are no joke.” The doctor made some notes on Patrick’s chart. “I’ll check in again toward the end of my shift, okay?”

“Okay,” he said, lying back on the pillows as she left.

“Your phone seems to be working,” David said, holding it up from where it was plugged in to show Patrick the screen. His voice sounded strangled. “I’ve gotta go. I can’t keep Stevie waiting any longer.” He reached out briefly, but then dropped his hand. “Maybe you can text me later?”

“Of course,” Patrick said, his own voice almost cracking with emotion.

“Bye,” David said, turning quickly and leaving the room.

His father was looking thoughtfully at him, and Patrick tried not to squirm under the scrutiny. “You’ve got a good friend there, Patrick.”

“Yeah, he’s… he’s the best,” Patrick said, drowsiness swamping out his ability to say anything more.

~*~

“He’s not going to tell them,” David said to the passenger window of Stevie’s car.

“David, give the guy a break — he’s clearly not feeling a hundred percent right now.”

He ignored Stevie’s very logical argument. “I mean, look at him. Look at his parents. I’ll never fit in with the wholesome, clean-cut vibe they have going on. Why would he want to tell his parents that he ended up with…” He gestured manically up and down at himself. “... this?”

Stevie cast a vicious side-eye in his direction. “That’s ridiculous.”

“Is it?” he blurted out in a high voice.

“David, he loves you. You know he loves you. Stop with this bullshit.”

He didn’t want to argue about it. Stevie wasn’t going to understand — she didn’t know what coming from a home that wasn’t dysfunctional was like anymore than he did. She didn’t understand that broken people like him didn’t have a place with families like that. Families where parents dropped everything and came rushing to their son’s aid, and not just because they thought he’d taken a prized crocodile bag.

He finally got the store open at ten-thirty, and a few people stopped by before lunch to inquire about Patrick. It was sweet, David thought, that people cared so much, but having to field their questions about Patrick’s health wasn’t helping his anxiety. By the afternoon, he was doing a fairly brisk business, which limited the amount of time he could spend spiraling about his relationship. Worrying that Patrick was realizing that if he was too ashamed to tell his parents that the two of them were dating, then their relationship was probably doomed.

By the time the Brewers themselves walked into the store just before closing, David was just about ready to jump out of his skin.

“Hi,” David said, and then immediately began to fret that he’d lost the ability to even say ‘hi’ like a normal person. “Is Patrick okay?”

“He is,” Marcy said. “They did some more tests and there’s no sign of infection, so he should be discharged tomorrow. They also went ahead and put a cast on his arm.”

David nodded, relieved. “Do you know how long you plan to stay in town? Do you have to get back home for work, or…?” He racked his brain, trying to remember what they did for a living. Clint did something in an office, he was pretty sure, and Marcy he couldn’t remember at all.

“We both had personal days to spare,” Clint said, “but I think we’ll head home on Sunday morning if Patrick doesn’t need more help.”

He has me, David wanted to shout, and he pressed his lips together to keep it in. “Do you need a place to stay for the remaining nights after Patrick is discharged? I can call Stevie and have her reserve a room at the motel.” He rolled his eyes. “It’s not a high-class establishment, but at least it’s close.” It would also put Patrick’s parents in close proximity to his own parents, which was risky, but he couldn’t think of a good excuse not to have them stay at the motel.

“Oh, that would be great, David. Thank you,” Marcy said.

“We were thinking,” Clint said, “we’d like to take you to dinner tonight.”

David tried to limit his physical recoil to the suggestion of spending so much uninterrupted time with Patrick’s parents. “You don’t have to do that.” He wasn’t sure if he could keep up this charade for another minute, much less an entire meal without Patrick there as a buffer.

“Please, David?” Marcy was weaponizing her eyes — he could see that Patrick came by it honestly. “It’s the least we can do.”

He looked around for a good excuse not to have dinner with Patrick’s parents. “I have to close up the store.”

“We can pick you up whenever you’re done,” Clint reasoned. “I’m in the mood for pizza, and I spotted a place near the hospital. Do you know it?”

David nodded reluctantly. “Reginos. It’s surprisingly good.” It was where he and Patrick had gone for their second date.

“Great. What time will you be finished here?” Clint asked, in a way that indicated he wouldn’t be taking no for an answer.

David thought about it. He didn’t have Patrick to help, and he’d let most of the closing up tasks slide the night before. “Umm, six-thirty?”

Clint clapped his hands together. “We’ll be back at six-thirty to pick you up.” He seemed very pleased, so David tried to look pleased too. He suspected his smile wasn’t quite cutting it.

As soon as they left, he texted Patrick. He wasn’t sure if Patrick would be checking his phone, but he hoped. Help, your parents are taking me for pizza. No response came immediately, so David went to work cashing out the register drawer.

His phone didn’t ping until he’d finished with the bookkeeping and was starting to sweep the floor. David leaned the broom against the counter and pulled his phone out of his pocket.

Patrick: I would kill for some pizza.

David: I’ll get you as many pizzas as you can stand when you’re home.

Patrick was typing for a while — David assumed he must be doing it with one thumb, poor thing.

Patrick: I miss you. Been thinking about you all day.

It wasn’t until he saw this text that David realized — ever since he left the hospital that morning, a part of his brain had been spooling out a scenario in which Patrick had decided to break up with him. Seeing that text made him weak with relief. He pressed the button to call Patrick.

“Hey,” Patrick said as soon as the call connected.

“Your typing was too slow. And I miss you too. But what the hell am I going to talk about during an entire meal with your parents?”

Patrick sighed heavily. “I’ve just made this worse for you. I was going to tell them this morning, but doctors and nurses kept coming in and out, and I felt like shit, and—”

“Honey, I told you. You don’t have to apologize.” David probed his feelings for the resentment he knew he’d be justified in feeling, but all he could find was sympathy. “I know this kind of thing is hard for you.”

“I keep wondering if you’re just holding back on being angry with me because I’m in the hospital,” Patrick said.

“I promise I’m not.” David took a deep breath. “I keep wondering if, faced with the idea of telling your parents about us, you’re realizing that I’m all wrong for you.”

“David. Nothing could be further from the truth. I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

They were silent for several seconds, basking in each other’s reassurances.

“Ask them to tell you stories about when I was little, that’ll keep them going for a while,” Patrick said. “Or talk about the store.”

“Okay, good ideas. Got any others?”

“I don’t know, tell them about the time you went parasailing with Anderson Cooper?” Patrick said with a laugh.

“Yeah, I’m not going to be doing that.”

“Will you be here in the morning when I get sprung from this place?”

“Won’t your parents think it’s weird, me being there?” David asked.

“I think I’ll ask them to meet us at the apartment. Can you pick me up? Just you?” His voice sounded small.

“I guess I’m going to be doing a lot of that until you can replace your car,” David responded with a smile that he hoped Patrick could hear.

Patrick groaned. “I hadn’t really even thought about that yet.”

“And you don’t need to,” David said, immediately regretting that he’d brought it up. “Just get some rest tonight and I’ll see you in the morning.”

~*~

Clint ran his fingers over the edge of the checkered tablecloth as the server put menus in front of them. “What’s good here, David?”

David’s eyes widened like he’d been asked a personal question rather than just what kind of pizza he liked. “Um, the meat lover is good. And the chicken pesto.” His lips slid to the side in a little half-smile. “Patrick likes the spicy barbecue chicken.”

Marcy wrinkled her nose. “I don’t like spicy pizza.”

“Yes, thank you,” David said. “Spicy food is fine, but that’s another genre of food from pizza. Spiciness destroys the flavor palette of a pizza; I’ve told him a million times.”

“I’m afraid he gets that from me, but I’ve resigned myself to the fact that there are certain foods I can’t get when I’m out with my wife,” Clint said, winking at Marcy.

“Or when you’re going to be sleeping next to me afterwards,” Marcy said, which made David laugh with surprise.

They ordered the meat lover pizza on David’s recommendation, and with that task completed, their conversation lulled. Clint tried not to be too blatant in his observation of David, this man who had gone into business with his son last year. This man who Patrick often ended up talking about during their phone calls when he ran out of other things to tell them about.

This man who, after this morning, Clint was convinced his son was in love with.

He didn’t think Marcy had noticed, and he’d decided not to bring it up to her in the car. He wanted to turn it over in his mind some more, determine if it had the weight of truth. But he’d seen the look on Patrick’s face when his eyes met David’s in that hospital room, and he was fairly certain he wasn’t wrong.

“So did Patrick really start playing hockey when he was four?” David asked suddenly. He grimaced almost like he was surprised the question had come out of his mouth.

Marcy launched into the story of the time she strapped their son into hockey gear and put him on the ice for his first lesson, and Clint watched the warmth grow in David’s eyes as he listened to the tale. It became clear during the conversation that David didn’t know anything about hockey, but he seemed interested nonetheless, asking follow-up questions about what Patrick had been like as a child until the pizza arrived, steaming and delicious.

They asked David about his own family as they ate. He hesitated at first in his responses, but he soon warmed to the topic. He talked about his father going into business with Stevie to save the motel, his mother serving on town council, and his sister starting her own business. It became clear that David was proud of what his family had accomplished in Schitt’s Creek.

“You’ve all done so much after such a terrible thing happened to you,” Marcy said.

“I think most people see what happened to us as karmic justice,” David said. “People love stories about rich people being knocked down a few pegs.”

“Well,” Marcy said thoughtfully, “I can’t pretend to know what your life was like before, but regardless, it’s unfair that you had everything stolen away. And it’s admirable, what your family has done for your town.”

David blushed, averting his eyes and wiping his hands with a napkin. “Thank you,” he said in a soft voice.

After dinner, they dropped David off at the motel before driving back to Patrick’s apartment. Marcy excused herself to the bathroom, and Clint pulled out his phone and called Patrick.

“Hey, Dad,” Patrick said when he answered, his voice sounding stronger than it had earlier in the day. “How was dinner?”

“It was good. Just checking to make sure they’re still planning to spring you in the morning.”

“Yeah, as far as I know.”

“What time should we be there to pick you up?” Clint asked.

“Oh, don’t worry about that. David’s going to pick me up tomorrow,” Patrick said.

“Doesn’t he have to open the store? It’s no problem for us to be there.”

“Nope,” Patrick said firmly. “We’ll meet you at the apartment.”

Clint smiled to himself. “You must be excited to get home.”

Patrick chuckled. “You have no idea. I’ll see you tomorrow, Dad. Love you.”

Marcy came out of the bathroom just as Clint was getting off the phone. “Patrick said David’s going to pick him up from the hospital tomorrow. He wants to meet us here.”

She frowned. “There’s no need for David to do that.”

“Well, Patrick wasn’t taking no for an answer.” He moved over to the window, shifting the curtain aside to look out on the nondescript lawn in the front of the apartment building. He remembered the last time Patrick broke up with Rachel, the night he came over to tell them he needed to move away and get a fresh start. “I keep going back to her by default but it’s never right. It’s not what I want.”

“What’s on your mind, sweetheart?” Marcy asked him.

He took a shaky breath, his eyes changing focus so that he mostly saw the reflection of the apartment in the window glass instead of the landscape outside. “Do you remember that boy, Mark? The captain of the baseball team when Patrick was in grade ten?”

“The catcher? Yes, I remember.”

“Do you remember how much Patrick used to talk about him? Walking us through every play at the plate he made?” They would ask Patrick how baseball practice had gone, and inevitably the story would turn to Mark — the way he played, or the funny things he said in the locker room.

“I mean, I guess so. Why?”

“He never talked about Rachel like that. Not even back then.”

“Clint, what are you talking about?”

He turned and faced his wife. “I said before that I thought David had unrequited feelings for Patrick, but I watched them at the hospital this morning. I watched Patrick. There’s nothing unrequited about it.”

Marcy frowned. “So you’re saying—”

“I’m saying if they aren’t a couple, then they’ve both got feelings for each other they aren’t talking about,” Clint said.

Confusion was evident on Marcy’s face. “But Patrick dated Rachel for years. And other girls.”

“I’ve been thinking about that a lot today,” Clint said with an unhappy sigh. He sat down on the sofa and put his elbows on his knees. “He was almost boxed into dating Rachel before he’d finished going through puberty. They were best friends for practically their whole lives. Everyone expected them to start dating when they got old enough, us included. And Patrick has always been such a people-pleaser; he did what was expected of him from the time he was little.”

He stood up again and paced across the floor, unable to sit still. “And, look, he could be… bisexual. Or some other orientation that I don’t know the name of. I don’t know. I just saw the look on that boy’s face this morning when he looked at David. And I don’t think I ever saw him look at Rachel that way.”

“So if that’s true, why hasn’t he told us? Why are they keeping it a secret?”

Clint ran his hands over his face. “I don’t know.”

“We’ve never given Patrick any reason to think we wouldn’t accept him, have we?”

“Other than to encourage him to get back together with Rachel when they were struggling?”

Marcy’s face fell. “And then I just assumed … with Stevie earlier, and other girls… I defaulted to the idea of him being straight. It never occurred to me not to.”

Clint walked over and took her hand. “Me either. So, we start making up for it now. Yeah?”

She wiped away a stray tear. “Yeah.”

Chapter 4

#schitt's creek #schitt's creek ff #schitt's creek fic #david x patrick #david x patrick ff #david x patrick fic #my fic

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aidanchaser · 5 years

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Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets: Everyone Lives AU

Table of Contents beta’d by @ageofzero

Chapter Thirteen The Very Secret Diary

It was a gloomy Monday when Ron and Harry lugged all of Hermione’s notes and school books to the hospital wing. She was insistent on keeping up with her school work, even though Ron suggested that being in the hospital was a wonderful excuse to slack off. Hermione told him that was absurd, she’d only fall behind, and they wouldn’t be able to get her help with exams. Ron agreed that delivering her homework each day might be a good idea.

A couple weeks went by. Students whispered about Hermione’s disappearance, and so many of them snuck by the infirmary to see what had happened to her that Madam Pomfrey put a curtain around her bed. So when Ron and Harry went to visit her that afternoon, they didn’t see that Lily was already at Hermione’s bedside until they stepped through the curtain.

“Oh, hi Mum,” Harry said as he set a stack of History of Magic notes on Hermione’s bedside table.

Lily smiled pleasantly at Ron and Harry. “Hello. Isn’t it sweet of you two to be taking notes for Hermione and delivering her assignments for her? I hope you’re not doing it out of any sort of guilty consciences.”

“It really was all my fault,” Hermione said quickly. “I shouldn’t have borrowed Ron’s wand for a Transfiguration spell. It completely backfired.”

“Yes, Ron, you really ought to get your wand fixed,” Harry said quickly.

“I know,” Ron said glumly. “I’m afraid to tell Mum. It was Charlie’s. He said he wouldn’t need it with the dragons and so I could have it. I don’t want to tell her I broke Charlie’s wand.”

“I’m sure she’d understand,” Lily said. “I do believe it was Professor Lockhart’s fault your wand broke, right? That’s what Harry said in his letter. I suggest you have him buy you a new one.”

“I’ll think about it,” Ron mumbled.

“Well, I am glad you two are being good to Hermione. I heard Professor McGonagall say she’s been very pleased with how well the two of you have been focusing.”

“It is easier to have Hermione explain it to us, but we have to try to explain it first,” Harry said.

Lily laughed and squeezed Harry’s hand. “You really are so much like your father. He and his friends would be so well-behaved when Remus was in the hospital.”

Harry smiled and his ears went pink at the compliment.

“Why was Mr. Lupin in the hospital?” Hermione asked.

Lily stood up from her chair, still smiling. “Well, I’d better leave you three. You don’t need a grown-up hanging around, and Hermione should be ready to go over your lessons from my class.”

“Oh, yes,” Hermione said. “Professor Lockhart came by this morning as well and helped me with a little of it too.”

Lily’s smile pinched like she’d taken a bite of lemon peel flavored Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Beans. “I see. Did he go over my lesson and spells or did he merely read you the passage from his book and smile charmingly?”

Hermione blushed — or rather, her few remaining whiskers quivered, which Harry assumed was the cat version of blushing — and said, “He didn’t win Witch Weekly’s Most-Charming-Smile Award five times for nothing.”

Lily’s sour expression did not soften at the humor. “Yes, as he is so fond of reminding everyone. I hope one day you will learn that a charming smile doesn’t necessarily make anyone a decent wizard.” She turned to Harry and Ron and said, “And the same goes for witches with charming smiles. There are better qualities to be enchanted with.”

Ron nodded, and Harry said, with a small smirk of his own, “But Mum, don’t you think Dad’s smile is just a little bit charming?”

Finally, a smile cracked through Lily’s irritation. “Yes. But the things I love about your father are his bravery, loyalty, and humility. And his excellent self-made Cleaning Charms. Now, really, I should prepare for my class tomorrow. And grade some papers.” She kissed Harry’s forehead and patted Ron’s shoulder, then left quickly.

Harry and Ron stayed with Hermione, all three of them working on their homework, until Madam Pomfrey shooed them off to bed.

—————————— ✶✶✶——————————

Dear Sirius,

Remember how I mentioned Moaning Myrtle? Well she flooded the hallway last night because someone threw a book at her. It’s a diary from 1943, and it’s really interesting, except for the part where it’s blank.

Ron keeps telling me it could be cursed, but it seems fine. It’s just blank. I don’t know how to figure out what’s inside it, but I’m sure it’s important. The date is from fifty years ago, and Malfoy told us the Chamber of Secrets was opened fifty years ago, and the name on the diary is T. M. Riddle, who was a Prefect and Head Boy, but he also won an award for Special Services to the school fifty years ago. It’s got to have something about the Chamber of Secrets in it. Hermione couldn’t make anything appear in it, though. Do you have any ideas?

Love, Harry

—————————— ✶✶✶——————————

Dear Harry,

Try Aparecium? It’s a basic revealing spell, but if someone was trying to keep their diary secret, and they were smart, they’d have thought of something more complicated.

I’ve never heard of T.M. Riddle, and I’ve never heard of the Chamber of Secrets being opened before. Sure, I knew about it. Everyone I grew up with was in Slytherin and every few years someone would try to find the Chamber, just to see if it existed, but no one ever found it. I think Malfoy might be pulling your leg.

Let me know if the Aparecium spell works, though.

Love, Sirius

—————————— ✶✶✶——————————

Dear Snitch,

Why don’t you ever write to me now that your Mum’s at school? Are you afraid I’ll tell her about the trouble you’re getting into? I won’t, I promise. Sirius says you still write to him, which is unfair.

Love you, can’t wait for your next Quidditch match. Let’s not have any broken limbs, charmed broomsticks, or unexpected dives this time, alright?

Love, Dad

—————————— ✶✶✶——————————

Dear Dad,

I haven’t written mostly because I figure Mum was telling you all the interesting things. Hermione is out of the hospital now and back in class. Madam Pomfrey says the Mandrakes are almost done and she can make Colin and Justin better soon.

But that’s really it. It’s been super quiet ever since Christmas. Lockhart seems to think the monster gave up because it was scared of him, but I don’t know who believes him. But maybe it really is all over. Maybe the Chamber of Secrets is closed again.

I’ll write again soon. Promise.

Love, Harry

—————————— ✶✶✶——————————

May 1, 1979

Lucius Malfoy,

Thank you for everything you did while we were in Paris. I was sorry Narcissa couldn’t attend, but I found the conversations absolutely stimulating. And I appreciate your offer of a job after graduation. I couldn’t ask for a better opportunity.

However, I heard from Avery and Lestrange that the Dark Lord wanted young purebloods to aid his cause. I’m worried about a conflict of interest. I mean you no disrespect, but Bellatrix introduced me to him and I’m sure I don’t need to tell you how inspiring he is.

If it’s all the same to you, I’d like to wait to give you a formal response until I know what responsibilities the Dark Lord has for me. He seemed very impressed with my family lineage and the things I could provide for our cause. I do hope you understand.

Sincerely, Regulus Black

—————————— ✶✶✶——————————

Valentine’s Day was an absolute disaster. Lockhart had singing dwarves dressed as cupids running around giving Valentine’s performances and reading cards out loud. Harry thought the whole thing absurd enough as it was, and then on his way to Charms class, a dwarf grabbed his bag.

Malfoy, Fred, and George were all standing nearby, so Harry tried to run for it. He had no desire to have a dwarf sing him a valentine in front of three people who would mock him endlessly about it. But in his escape attempt, the bag ripped, his inkwell crashed on the floor and spilled all over his belongings. Then the dwarf grabbed his ankles and Harry tumbled right into his spilled ink. His books and parchment went flying. Everyone was already laughing so hard, he thought maybe they wouldn’t hear the valentine or care about it. But as the dwarf opened his mouth, Fred and George shushed everyone.

The dwarf, in a gravely voice, began to sing,

“His eyes are green as a fresh pickled toad, His hair is as dark as a blackboard. I wish he was mine, he’s really divine, The hero who conquered the Dark Lord.”

Percy Weasley, the only one not laughing, shouted at everyone to go to class. “Move along,” he said loudly. “You too Malfoy.”

But Malfoy didn’t seem to have any intention of leaving. He reached down and picked up the diary that had spilled from Harry’s bag.

“Give it back,” Harry said as he got to his feet.

“Oh,” Malfoy crooned. “Wonder what Harry Potter’s written in his diary.” He flipped it open to a page, blank like all the others, and began to read, “I’m so glad my Mum’s a professor. I get everything I want all the time, even though Malfoy’s such a better Seeker —”

Harry wasn’t about to listen to another minute of this. “Expelliarmus!” he said, and the diary shot out of Malfoy’s hand and into his own.

“Harry!” a voice shouted and Harry winced.

Lily pushed her way through the crowd of students. “No spells in the hallway! That’ll be five points from Gryffindor. All of you, go to class!”

Malfoy sniggered as he pushed past Ginny Weasley to get into his classroom. “By the way, Weasley, I don’t think Potter liked your Valentine much.”

Ginny froze in the hallway and turned bright red.

“Mr. Malfoy!” Lily shouted after him. “Respect your classmates, or I’ll be taking points on your behalf next!” She huffed in frustration and looked over Harry, as covered in ink as his parchment.

Percy immediately began to tell her how he dispersed the students, but she didn’t have the patience to hear it.

“Enough, Mr. Weasley. I believe you have a Transfiguration class to attend.”

As Percy left, Lily cast a quick cleaning spell on Harry’s school things and his robes. As she mended the tear in his bag, Harry noticed his diary was perfectly dry, and had been when Malfoy picked it up.

Lily handed him his bag, then looked over at Ginny, who was so still Harry would’ve believed she’d been petrified. “What class do you have, dear?” Lily asked.

“H-Herbology,” Ginny stammered. She sounded like she might cry.

“Let me walk you, alright? I think Harry can find his own way to class.”

Ginny still didn’t move, but kept staring at Harry as he put the diary into his mended bag and started up the stairs to Charms class. Finally, Lily put an arm around Ginny’s shoulders and gently led her away.

Harry thought about Ginny’s valentine for the better part of the day — it was hard not to, with Fred and George singing it every five minutes — but as soon as he could, he slipped away to his dorm to test out his new theory with the diary. He sat down on his bed, opened the diary to January first, and dropped a dot of ink onto the paper. It stayed on the page for a moment, then faded into the paper. Harry took a deep breath and wrote, “My name is Harry Potter.”

He waited, breath held, while the words shimmered on the page before finally sinking into the diary. Another moment passed, and then ink oozed out of the paper until the diary said,

Hello, Harry Potter. My name is Tom Riddle. How did you come by my diary?

—————————— ✶✶✶——————————

Dear Dad,

Valentine’s Day was a disaster. Lockhart had these singing dwarves sending everyone valentines. It was so obnoxious.

I got one from Ginny. I guess she likes me? I don’t really know why. Do I have to do anything? I don’t know about girls or valentines or anything.

Love, Harry

—————————— ✶✶✶——————————

Dear Harry,

It’s been pretty obvious for years that Ginny has a crush on you. I’m surprised it took a Valentine for you to figure it out.

And no, you don’t have to do anything. Unless you want to do anything. Dating takes two, and if you or her don’t want to date, you don’t do anything.

Also, you’re twelve. Don’t worry about girls for at least three more years, please. I don’t think Sirius could handle it.

Love, Dad

—————————— ✶✶✶——————————

Dear Uncle Remus,

I figured out the diary! I assume Sirius told you about it. He tells you everything.

I tried writing in the diary, and it was incredible. It read my words and it wrote back!

I asked it about the Chamber of Secrets and it showed me Tom Riddle catching the person who originally opened the Chamber of Secrets, but….

I don’t know if I’m happy to know it. And I don’t think I can do anything about it. I don’t know what to do at all.

Love, Harry

—————————— ✶✶✶——————————

Dear Harry,

Secrets you don’t know what to do with are hard, especially when they’re not yours to share.

You have to do what feels right. If you think someone is in danger, you should tell an adult. If no one is in danger, it’s not your secret to share. You can ask the person who is responsible to share it, but there isn’t much else you can do about it.

Best of luck. I know you’ll make the right call.

Love, Uncle Remus

#harry potter everyone lives au #harry potter and the chamber of secrets #hp fic #hp everyone lives #harry potter

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visionssofgideon · 7 years

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In-depth Reflection on Kingsman: The Golden Circle (Spoilers)

FUCKING SPECTACULAR, EH!

After so much waiting, watching new promos and trailers everyday, I watched Kingsman: The Golden Circle today! The sequel to my favorite movie of all time! And BOY, I have so many thoughts. I am going to try to go as in-depth as I can, and as much in order as I can but BEWARE this is nearly a shit post with me pouring all of my feelings into it and will have random points all over the place, but mainly is me trying to process everything, this is A LOT (it’s 3k) and basically a summary of the movie

SPOILER ALERT!!! OBVIOUSLY LOL okAY LET’S GO

They started off the fucking MOVIE with Take me Home, Country Roads on a bagpipe FUCK

FUCK YEAH EGGSY UNWIN! GARY UNWIN! MY MAN! MY DUDE! MY SON! YOU LOOK SO FINE IN THAT SUIT, YOU LOOK JUST LIKE YOUR DECEASED HUSBAND shit too soon

IT HASN’T EVEN BEEN A MINUTE CHARLIE GET THE FUCK OUT IDC HOW YOU SURVIVED GO AWAY also ALL THESE CARS OH FUCK IS THIS ALL POPPY! Anyways Yes yes yes EPIC drifting cab scene! Eggsy has grown so much yeah boy you kick his ass! I love this drifting cab scene, they built a custom cab that could drift how amazing is that! But oh nooo, ugh Charlie’s stupid arm made the poisonous blade kill the driver :(

Eggsy can hold his breath because he was training for the marines but also throwback to his training when he was the only one that was smart enough to see the two-way mirror! The police were like yOu wOt m8 @ Eggsy but iT’S OKAY there’s a secret Kingsman entrance under the lake! By the way HI MERLIN I LOVE YOU YOU SCOTTISH MAN but Eggsy you are a BRAVE man for jumping into shit! On a side not, the hand just hacked into Kingsman holy shite

HI TILDE agh prefer Eggsy with the love of his life, Harry Hart, but you DAMN brave for wanting to kiss a shit-covered Eggsy! Also HI JB YOU’VE GROWN SO MUCH! But wait, EGGSY MOVED INTO HARRY’S HOUSE! Just like the fanfics said! That makes me so happy

Cool transition from a bag of pot to Cambodia! Poppy is FUCKING CRAZY, actual psychopath, I mean cannibalistic burgers, delicious! Those dogs are cool, more realistic than other movies, but rip people who are put through the shredder! Ngl that burger looks pretty good

AW TILDE TRYING TO TEACH EGGSY MANNERS BUT FUCK HERE IS THE DELETED HARTWIN BREAKFAST SCENE FROM TSS! THE MYTHICAL BREAKFAST SCENE IS REAL! Eggsy paying close attention to his lover Harry Hart is

The fact that Eggsy has to hold back tears when simply thinking of Harry is so :( And he even asks Mr. Pickles, because he remembers Harry’s love for him. Eggsy Unwin was in love with Harry Hart, okay.

“Galahad, late again” HAHA just like Harry used to be! Hi off-brand Michael Caine-looking Arthur! ROXY MORTON IS MY GIRLFRIEND HI I LOVE YOU OKAY I KNOW WHAT’S GOING TO HAPPEN BUT I LOVE YOU! She looks so fly, so does Eggsy and Merlin! Also bye @Charlie I can’t believe he survived armless and now works for the craziest person ever!

Honestly rip this guy who just got the golden circle tat and is eating his friend in the form of a burger which btw looks pretty good! Welcome to hell!

Oh nice, the dinner scene! Eggsy is such a gentleman but he actually loves Tilde? He’s actually doing this wow and it’s all because Roxy Morton aka my gf is helping him out! Of course he doesn’t know about spanish painter Frida Kahlo! Roxy ugh ur da best from galahad, and roxy asking best friend or best agent? Both ;) AGH also NICE Eggsy started his own wall like Harry’s of the menial news! UGH Eggsy’s friend is so dumb what is he DOING! AHHHH HAND GRENADE and Eggsy cursing 100x in front of Tilde’s parents

NO NO NO BOMBING EGGSY’S PLACE! Everything is gone ALL OF HARRY’S STUFF! NO JB NONO EGGSY’S FRIEND! WHAT THE WHERE DID THESE MISSILES COME FROM oh fucking POPPY

Roxy knew, she knew, she even tried to escape but… Roxy Morton! MATTHEW VAUGHN I am utterly disgusted and disheartened! Roxy had so much potential, and remaining in a platonic relationship with Eggsy, their friendship was amazing! She was a brilliant agent, not to mention um the only female!? DENIAL! DENIAL! Roxy survived, she tried escaping, so she survived! WE WILL SEE ROXY MORTON IN THE THIRD KINGSMAN MOVIE OKAY

Arthur is dead, all the Kingsman including Percival are dead… Poppy is absolutely crazy, and is giving Charlie a new arm! God, from the trailer, the crazy slingshot arm! Agh no no no this won’t be good…

Eggsy, all alone, in despair. And here go Merlin and Eggsy blaming each other, for possible betrayal! And god Eggsy, Eggsy telling it like it is, everybody is dead, JB, Roxy, his friend, everybody… but Merlin told him to not shed a tear, to hold in emotion, as if he has done this before.

Thus, the doomsday protocol ensues- shopping, drinking. Statesman whiskey! Drinking to everybody! Drink to Scottland! Haha, nice try @ drunk!Merlin! But drunk Eggsy slurring his words and Merlin being an absolute mess and crying is just…. Somebody please get Merlin Kentucky fried chicken, please

HAHA that part of Merlin breaking in, opening the barrel! Hello CHANNING TATUM! Agent Teqila HAHA okay! That fighting was great, wow like being an American for once! WOW please don’t set their balls on fire, that would not be good! HAHA Yeah Tequila, go fuck yourself!

WAIT BUT, HARRY HART IS ALIVE! HARRY HART, SHAVING, BEAUTIFUL MALE SPECIMAN, HARRY HART! HARRY FUCKING HART! EGGSY UNWIN’S SOULMATE! He is alive, and beautiful as ever! Yes Eggsy, we understand, “Fuck me” as in you love Harry Hart we get it! Eggsy and Merlin yelling, but alas, a two-way mirror! YAY GINGER ALE TO THE RESCUE LOVE YOU HALLE BERRY MY QUEEN

Harry looks all smiley! All happy! But he doesn’t know… I predicted this, his amnesia :( Please remember bby! Eggsy is all frustrated, but look at Harry focusing on his butterflies! YES YES THE STATESMAN IN KENTUCKY SAVED HARRY wow cool technology for being American, I would like to thank Ginger! Unfortunately, Harry reverted to his old self. Before kingsman or army, he was a lover of butterflies. Wow. Before being in the army, a kingsman agent, he was a lepidopterist

ELTON JOHN, THE BEST PART OF THIS MOVIE POSSIBLY! Telling it to Poppy as it should be!

HAHA hello champ! Yay jeff bridges! What a man, he seems so chill, I want to have a conversation with him! Champ>>>>>Arthur. Will never get over the fact that the Kingsman are knights of the round table, galahad, lancelot, percival… the statesman are fckuing alcoholic beverages how American sigh,,,,, also Whiskey, hi pedro pascal!

Harry Hart reading his dear book about butterflies! No, they’re putting him through training again to jog his memory! But poor Harry is struggling no no my bby please stop! Btw Colin Firth is the best actor ever okay thanks! Agh this scene is breaking my heart :(((( Harry’s trying to hard to remember, Merlin is trying so much, but Harry’s just here soaking wet :(((

AW JB 2.0 thanks @tilde aw okay people get people they love dogs to help them…. Keep that in mind for later for what I KNOW is coming up!

Lol mini condom and penis joke bc haha America sucks! Look Charlie’s gf who Eggsy will have to get to for their mucus membrane because the trackers needs to be… Haha Whiskey “tinder-what?” me!

BLUE VEIN shit… tequila come on mate! So sugar is 10000x worse than any drug rip :( Elton John is great I love him! Poppy is crazy pt. 2, those dogs are scary, please no! Hey, Elton is friend hell yeah!

Ahhh, can I just say, even though I don’t want Eggsy with Tilde, he is such a decent man to tell her what he is going to do! Despite knowing she’s going to be mad! NO PROPOSAL PLEASE but still, Eggsy Unwin is a good man that is all I have to say! Started from the bottom (literally) now we’re here! Lol @Tilde he actually loves Harry Hart! Anyways, time to travel through the vagina! Matthew Sexist Vaughn everybody! LOL @Merlin being uncomfortable and Ginger being total 100% chill, they are perfect for each other! i ship

HI HARRY! Oh god is this the maggot butterfly scene? YES IT IS! oh fuck fuck fuck. Okay can I say, Harry Hart is so smiley, he loves talking about butterflies. THIS SCENE GOD yes Harry pin Eggsy against the wall! Btw my FAVORITE thing is when Harry says “Perhaps you mean larvae” and smiles. Such a sweet smile! And the smiles are sad at the same time, because he doesn’t know who Eggsy is! And now Eggsy is sad drinking, trying not to think about the old Harry, trying to deal with the whole Tilde situation. God, the scenes between Harry and Eggsy are making me so elated with both joy and sorrow, because Hartwin. BUT THE PUPPY! Eggsy looked up pet store and

OH MY GOD MR. PICKLES 2.0! FAVORITE SCENE EVER! Ahhh Harry smiling, or rather Colin smiling at the pupper, the most precious thing! Young, non-agent Harry Hart is innocent and will love and cherish a puppy. BUT EGGSY, stop torturing him! Eggsy is trying so hard to jog Harry’s memory, but it’s so sad! Also, Colin Firth’s acting in this scene, is just fantastic! Absolutely amazing, to see the contrast! Young Harry Hart or CGId Colin Firth is the sweetest thing, to see his love Mr. Pickles. Because truly, Mr. Pickles was Harry Hart’s pressure point. Saying that Harry would never hurt a puppy, it was a blank, and HARRY IS BACK! Harry Hart, the agent, the man who knew he was an agent, but also a man. A man with feelings, with love, with innocence! No more Eggy, hello Eggsy, your husband! GOSH, THE HUG! Eggsy Unwin on his tippy toes hugging his soulmate Harry Hart and the puppy he got him! YES, remember how Tilde got Eggsy a puppy to help him because she loved him. If you love somebody and get them a puppy, then you know that Eggsy Unwin is deeply in love with Harry Hart. I truly think this is it. Hartwin confirmed #nice

BAR NICE yay Harry is back! Still can’t believe! OH GOD Eggsy holding back tears seeing his eye, but Harry completely and undoubtedly ROCKING those eyepatch-glasses like he was meant to! Okay, who is this redneck guy calling Harry the f-word. Please, Harry Hart may be the gayest man alive (in TSS with Dean’s guy saying that there’s “another rent boy around the corner” triggering Harry just like the f-word did, as well as his smirk in TSS when saying “my black jewish boyfriend” HAHA) but this is just rude. And Harry can’t aim because his depth perception is 100x worse than before now :( Stop punching Harry my bby! #StopHurtingHarryHart2k17! Manners DO Maketh Man, but Harry still needs to relearn! Well Whiskey going to whip them into shape, Diana Prince 2.0? That’s a REALLY GOOD FIGHT SCENE! Wow Southerners are not like what I expected! I hope Harry gets better soon

UGH Poppy is crazy pt. 3! This disease is crazy, but there is Elton John to save the day! ELTON YOU DA MAN! Anyways, yikes! DANCING HHAHA, Tequila could bust some dank moves! Anyways the world is going crazy, but what else is new? OH the US president is a dick… Trump, is that you? Low-key about Trump even though this finished filming before he became president! See, the president here is what I think of when I think of Southerners.

Okay so they’re going to Italy! And Eggsy is not going without Harry! Aw, look at my sons who are so in love with each other! Nice outfits boy! Aw, Harry can’t do too much field work because he’s still recuperating :( He couldn’t aim his watch thing, but a bang will do! BTW Colin actually knows Italian, so this is perfect! HAHA River! Lol I hate @Charlie but SHIT his gf got caught hahahah yikes… Oh no Harry is hallucinating again! And here come a crazy ride, which Pedro and Taron actually felt because Matthew Vaughn wants to make everything as realistic as possible! Because Matthew Vaughn is the devil!! Okay this is hella intense for not being a fight scene but also funny because of them yelling! Lol they stopped because of Eggsy pulling the parachute (tb to TSS) but it’s an American flag wow how American! And the old man said that was the best shit he’s had in a while, so I guessed it all worked out!

Okay cabin scene, Eggsy greets his bf again yay but THERE ARE SHOOTERS SHIT also nice @whiskey really cool fight scene and DIANA PRINCE 2.0! Okay Harry just shot Whiskey and oh no Eggsy don’t blame yourself! It’s not your fault, really it’s not! But don’t yell at Harry, he just saved your life with that cologne lmao… Okay I don’t like Eggsy being mad at Harry :( OH SHIT WUDDUP CHARLIE JUST BLEW UP HIS GF yikes sucks. Btw Merlin and Ginger working together is amazing, they are a new ship!

The president sucks pt. 2 (again, Trump?) Wow this human in cage thing is crazy, dystopian shit, actual yikes! Not to mention everybody has the “dancing disease” lmao! Look, merlehad! Haha so apparently Harry should know Merlin’s favorite singer but he doesn”t rip

Thought the lawyer was Merlin ngl

Ugh Eggsy is sad, Harry make him feel better! MARTINIS! Oh shit, this is going to be emotional. Eggsy talking about Tilde to Harry, but Harry loves him. And god, talking about when he was shot by Valentine. Not thinking of anything, anybody, because he never loved anybody… Brings me back to when he wanted to go back to his mother while he still had amnesia, who most likely passed away :( Please Harry Hart, I know you love Eggsy. Somebody love him. He says love is “worth living for”, and he lived for Eggsy.. WHAT IF HE thought of Eggsy when he was dying, but he didn’t say anything here because Eggsy had just told him that he has a gf SHIT SHIT SHIT no no please hartwin no

Aw sorry Whiskey :( He lost his gf, but now he is vengeful… wow okay this is a lot

MERLIN IN A KINGSMAN SUIT! YES MERLIN, I LOVE YOU, YES YES YOU LOOK SO FINE! And the machete is his haha! Wow a baseball and bat, so American.

And so we are here, Cambodia, and SHIT LAND MINE. No no no no, this is where it happens. WHY DOESN’T THE FROZEN THING HAVE MORE THAN 1 USE what kind of faulty fucking kingsman/statesman shit is that if it only has 1 use WHY DIDN’T YOU CARRY MORE MERLIN WHY YOU’RE SO STUPID NO SORRY YOU’RE NOT STUPID ILY BUT WHY :(((( Merlin sacrificing himself for Harry and Eggsy, because he is fully devoted to Kingsman. Eggsy trying to hold back emotion, but Harry and Merlin fully knowing what being a Kingsman is. “No time for emotion” FUCK

OH GOD.TAKE ME HOME, COUNTRY ROADS! Merlin singing in his scottish accent, yelling out like he was meant to. God, why. Merlin, such a brilliant man, WHY. And he’s distracting Poppy’s men to save Eggsy and Harry! Okay, DENIAL! NO. Did you HEAR that last note?! Merlin braced himself and closed his eyes, but he might’ve not died! Merlin, Hamish, survived! His legs may have been blown off, but we will see him in the third movie, legless or not! I refuse to believe Merlin is dead.

Elton John as low-key performer/drag queen is my FAVORITE! It’s Wednesday FUCK YEAH! Oh, Eggsy and Harry look so vengeful, and they are perfect fighting together! Absolutely amazing! Eggsy taking Harry’s blind side is amazing, and their fighting impeccable. THE BITCH IS BACK ON THE MOVIE THEATER, YES INDEED! ELTON JOHN JUST HIT A MAN I LOVE HIM! Harry Hart, Eggsy Unwin, spy husbands fighting side by side!

Okay, bye @ dogs! ! WOW ELTON JOHN IS A FRIEND YES HAHA, okay low-key thought Elton John was going to say “If you save the world, we can do it in the asshole” to be Harry’s Tilde but he said “you can get backstage passes” which is the same thing OKAY GOD ELTON JOHN X HARRY HART NEW SHIP?? YES YAY wow he blew a kiss to him I’m dead this is so gay I love it harry hart fucked elton john

Charlie can go die okay thanks bye. Okay the one arm thing is dumb, Eggsy you have an advantage use both arms lol, anyways YES FOR MERLIN, REMEMBER MERLIN EGGSY!

Okay last fights. Poppy is crazy pt. final! Julianne Moore’s acting is AMAZING, really great! But um, viva las vegans? That’s dumb. Okay anyways OH SHIT BOI WHISKEY Harry Hart knew it! FINAL FIGHT SCENE and this is amazing! Absolutely amazing fight scene of spy husbands vs. Wonder Woman 2.0! Whiskey lost somebody because of drug addicts, man wow Kingsman really focuses on real issues, like the environment and drug addiction, but the villains are some crazy people!

Okay, Harry Hart is absolutely amazing, and he can fight amazingly now! Also, Colin Firth doing most of his stunts is AMAZING! Still can’t get the fact that Eggsy fit through the lasso! This is like the church scene in TSS and I love it! Epic fighting scenes with gore x rock music is A+!

YAY WORLD SAVED! Everybody is back! And the president sucks, so YAY FEMALE PRESIDENT! I think this is @ the American govt. and Trump LOL wow I love this movie.

SCOTLAND WINE BY KINGSMAN FUCK… Rest in peace Merlin :(

YES, GINGER IS FIELD AGENT! Okay besides the Roxy thing and tracker going inside vagine thing, this is a feminist movie! Female president, female statesman agent! FUCK YEAH!

Harry Hart and Eggsy Unwin, once again together… but Eggsy is getting married which, let’s not think about. MIRROR SCENE PARALLEL TO TSS AHH I want Harry Hart and Eggsy Unwin to love each other, to cherish each other, even if Eggsy doesn’t know “what the fuck is going on.” Alas, denial is key.

FINALLLY WE SEE EGGSY’S MUM WHAT HAPPENED TO THE WHOLE “come live with me” fiasco from TSS HMM ALSO WHERE IS DAISY @ Matthew Vaughn you owe us

Colin Firth’s monologue as Harry Hart made me realize, that I love Kingsman and will never get over it. It is only the beginning, and I can’t wait for more. This had so much emotion, despite it being so intense. RIP Kingsman agents, JB, Roxy, Merlin. Harry Hart, I love you. Hartwin, I will NEVER give up on you.

Oh boi Tequila is kingsman???? damn okay nice hat boi

FUCK

I’m going to cry at 2 am while singing Take Me Home, Country Roads (update: I DID CRY AT 2 AM)

F U C K !

If you read until the end, you are a TRUE Kingsman fan and true mutual/reader. Nice to know there are others out there who are just as crazy as me, but what can you do when you have such an amazing movie!

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spicynbachili1 · 5 years

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I Have Watched 300 Movies in Theaters in 2018, Mission Accomplished

A winner is you

Hello, starmen and starwomen, and welcome back to The 300, my successful attempt to see 300 movies in theaters in 2018. I’ve watched new releases, classics, hidden gems, and festival films to experience the wide world of cinema in all its forms. With so much moviegoing variety, I think there’s probably something I’ve seen that you’d also like. If not, that’s on you, jabroni.

As always, there are three rules for The 300:

The movie must be at least 40 minutes long, meeting the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences’ definition of a feature film.

I must watch the movie at a movie theater, screening room, or outdoor screening venue.

While I can watch movies I’ve seen before 2018, I cannot count repeated viewings of the same film in 2018 multiple times.

The 300 started as a dumb joke. I figured I’d exploit the system and see as many movies as possible via MoviePass. The number 300 was nice and round, and it gave me wiggle room so I wouldn’t have to go to the movies every day. Thanks to the hyper masculine silliness of the Zack Snyder film, 300 also became a fun excuse to do the dumb photoshops that have accompanied these weekly recaps.

For example:

Without MoviePass, this wouldn’t have been possible. I have renewed my love of going to the movies thanks to a lot of misguided venture capital put into tech companies with terrible business models. Subscription services Like MoviePass and AMC A-List make regular moviegoing possible when it would otherwise be prohibitively expensive, but they are unsustainable. Smoke ‘em while you got ‘em. For instance, I think I’ve seen $3,600 worth of movies on MoviePass this year, and all I’ve paid is about $110. To Helios and Matheson shareholders, I’m sorry for playing by the rules as written.

Given MoviePass’ decline, the 300 also wouldn’t have been possible without my access to press screenings and my ability to attend and cover film festivals. In fact, a good chunk of The 300 is thanks to extensive viewing at the 2018 Tribeca Film Festival and the 2018 New York Film Festival. Part of me feels like this is a bit of a cheat, but I put in the time, and that’s something.

The total runtime of The 300 is 31,387 minutes. That’s 523.11 hours. That’s 21.79 days. Putting that all together, that’s 21 days, 19 hours, and 7 minutes worth of movies in theaters in 2018.

There’ll be a longer recap to come since I have lots of thoughts about a year of dedicated moviegoing, and ditto the intimate-yet-shared solitude of seeing good films with others. The year isn’t over, gang.

And so, here we are.

296 of 300: An Oversimplification of Her Beauty (2012)

Director: Terence Nance Starring: Terence Nance, Namik Minter Country: USA Seen at BAM Rose Cinemas (Brooklyn, NY) Wednesday, November 14th

An Oversimplification of Her Beauty feels like a semi-documentary partially-animated rom-com collage about unrequited love written by Italo Calvino and Michel Gondry. Terence Nance playfully cuts back and forth between a short film about a romantic relationship with his friend Namik Minter that never materialized, and a rumination on that relationship a few years after the fact. Nance also hops between fiction and non-fiction, and different animation styles, and different narrators for the voiceover.

It takes a moment to settle, but Nance captures the frustrated mindset of loving someone who just doesn’t love you back, and that unsavory thought process when you beat yourself up over it. We’ve all been on either side of that equation at some point of our lives, and it’s surprising (and mortifying) how well the movie recreates that recursive self-flagellation. What did I do wrong? Maybe something minor, or possibly nothing at all. People drawn to each other don’t always feel the same about the other person. Nance even mentions the obvious answer to his obsession: maybe she’s just not into you. Minter cares about him, likes him, is attracted to him, and yet. That unexpressed reservation may be inexpressible.

I mentioned the film as a mortifying experience, and that’s more true in the second half. At that point, An Oversimplification of Her Beauty feels like a public artistic spectacle of a tricky private relationship. While Nance is game to explore his hang-ups in public and make a spectacle of his neuroses, I wondered how Minter felt about her life being explored by someone else. It’s awkward seeing Nance pine for Minter on screen given how obtrusive his cinematic obsession feels; maybe that’s part of the inexpressible reservation. I’m not sure the whole comes together, but it’s a deeply felt art piece about one-sided romance and irresolvable feelings.

297 of 300: Widows (2018)

Director: Steve McQueen Starring: Viola Davis, Michelle Rodriguez, Elizabeth Debicki, Cynthia Erivo Country: UK/USA Seen at AMC Loews 34th Street 14 (New York, NY) Thursday, November 15th

It’s unfair to compare Widows to Ocean’s 8 (The 300 Week 23). There’s a heist in each film, sure, but they are so tonally different. Widows is less like Ocean’s and more like The Wire. Picture Steve McQueen’s version of a Michael Mann or Christopher Nolan thriller, with an edge sharpened by co-writer Gillian Flynn (Gone Girl). Widows is a high-minded crime drama that’s also an exploration of gender, race, class, political rhetoric, structural inequality, and violence. It’s one of the best-crafted movies of the year, with a stellar ensemble cast, and it’s currently slotted in my top 10 of 2018.

We begin with a heist gone horribly wrong (but blowed up real good). The widows of the dead thieves are brought together to pull off a big job. They don’t really have a choice; if they don’t take the job, they’re in debt, dead, or without options in life. The ladies essentially have to clean up after the men in their lives. Viola Davis is great as the no-nonsense ringleader, and Michelle Rodriguez is ever the reliable supporting player. Elizabeth Debicki and Cynthia Erivo are the two breakout performers of the ensemble. Debicki plays a woman no longer content being abused and acted upon, and Erivo is a moral force and a physical presence every time she’s on screen. Daniel Kaluuya is also great in the film as a political candidate’s ruthless, sociopathic enforcer, pure menace every time he’s on screen.

McQueen has always been great with long takes in his films, and there’s a standout single-shot sequence in Widows. Colin Farrell’s character is up for re-election in a South Side Chicago precinct, part of a local political dynasty. He courts the black vote in hopes it’ll give him an edge over his opponent. He leaves a photo opp in a depressed part of the South Side, gets into his car, and is driven a few minutes away to his home in an affluent neighborhood. All the while, he’s saying the sorts of two-faced things we suspect politicians say in private. The driver of this car is black, and just does his job while this exchange goes on, his blank face sometimes visible through the reflective, tinted windshield. In just a few minutes, we get the layout of this part of Chicago, a sense of the economic disparities from block to block, and experience the whiplash of private and public personas donned by politicians. Here’s the formal power of a single shot well-considered, properly deployed, and well-executed; a shot like the perfect crime.

Widows is masterful entertainment.

298 of 300: Voyage of Time (2016)

Director: Terrence Malick Country: USA Seen at BAM Howard Gilman Opera House (Brooklyn, NY) Friday, November 16th

Calling a film a “tone poem” is like saying a short story is merely “interesting.” As George Saunders said, you want a story to be so much more, and for people to say your work is brilliant or moving or that they want to sleep with you. But “interesting”? “Interesting” is a polite admission of disinterest.

Terence Malick’s Voyage of Time is an interesting tone poem. We view the creation of Earth through its end with imagery that is gorgeous but too often familiar, and hokey, repetitive, pseudo-spiritual narration. Malick intercuts these pristine images of life evolving with grainy digital footage of the world we know today. While I understand the idea behind these present interruptions during an unfolding past, they seemed too jarring, though they take on a power by the end. I’ll also admit loving some of the more psychedelic imagery, whether of bacteria or prehistoric underwater life. The best single cut in the movie is so memorable: a single low-angle shot of wheat to signify the transition from hunter-gatherer societies to agrarian societies before transitioning to modern cityscapes. (Who needs the Industrial Revolution, right?)

The live musical accompaniment at the BAM opera house was phenomenal, though, and made the sort of tedious movie a fascinating experience. David OReilly’s game Everything is a much better realization of what Malick was trying to do with Voyage of Time.

299 of 300: Jason and the Argonauts (1963)

Director: Don Chaffey Starring: Todd Armstrong, Nancy Kovack, Honor Blackman, Gary Raymond Country: USA Seen at Film Forum (New York, NY) Saturday, November 17th

My love for movies can be traced back to my Uncle Mike. He used to live in our house for a while. I was maybe five or six years old. Every now and then he’d bust out a videotape of an old movie he loved and give me a curated journey through his cinematic obsessions. That’s how I was first introduced to the work of Ray Harryhausen, and ditto the original Planet of the Apes movies, Sinbad movies, the original Star Trek show and films, and so on. It’s odd to think that an entire life of movie watching might be defined by one person. It’s the same way that an older sibling’s music collection helps mold the taste of a younger sibling. My Uncle Mike was the first older brother I never had.

Jason and the Argonauts was one of the films he showed me. I’ve always been fond of the film even though I haven’t seen it since I was a child. It’s a wonderful old-timey adventure in the Sinbad mold, featuring some of Harryhausen’s most iconic work. The battle against the skeleton warriors is still phenomenally choreographed, which is surprising for such an old film. There’s genuine cause and effect as our Greek heroes, outnumbered and terrified, slash at the air and leap over the blades of these undead soldiers.

Watching it as an adult for the first time, I was struck by how unsubtly homoerotic the movie is. It was Ancient Greece, so it fits. Just watch that dynamic between Hercules and Hylas. They are totally into each other from the first second they meet. I wonder how this played in 1963.

While MoviePass made The 300 possible from a practical standpoint, the seeds were planted years ago while sitting in front of a tiny television watching VHS copies of movies made decades before I was born.

300 of 300: After Life (1998) (aka ワンダフルライフ; Wandafuru Raifu)

Director: Hirokazu Kore-eda Starring: Arata, Erika Oda Country: Japan Seen at The Film Society of Lincoln Center (New York, NY) Monday, November 19th

Hirokazu Kore-eda’s After Life is such a wonderfully humane ugly-cry of a movie, and a fitting 300th film. After dying, you are told that your happiest memory will be recreated on film. This recreated memory will be the only thing you recall for the rest of eternity. The set-up is fantastical, but its exploration and concerns are so grounded. Purgatory is a municipal building, and the people who handle and process these cases are a mix of therapist and HR rep. After Life is all about the moments that make life worthwhile, and many of them are tiny, private, so achingly human.

This is formally unlike the other Kore-eda movies I’ve seen, and often feels more like a documentary rather than a narrative feature. The people playing the recently departed were mostly non-actors interviewed about their own lives. The interviews with the people are carried out with simplicity, and their unscripted responses make it seem like conversations with an older relative. The essence of these treasured memories is the specificity of detail—the flavor or smell of the world, a turn of phrase, a fine distinction in the quality of sensation. One person remembers the sun on his skin as an infant, but its warmth was soft; not the summer sun, but the autumn sun. A WWII veteran recalls intense hunger and how delicious rice could be with just a little salt. The fact that some of these interview subjects have passed away in real life adds a greater poignancy to their memories. In real life, they got to live some version of the film’s fictional process.

Amid this human beauty, After Life is also an oddly affecting workplace drama. As we learn about the people who interview and recreate these memories, we become attached to them. They question why they do their job, and why any of this matters, which seems like this larger commentary about the existential strife of social workers, counselors, and artists. What is their job but to listen and interpret. It’s a process of receptive empathy, coaxing out the hidden joys from a person’s life to remind them that life was worth living. Extended to the purpose of writers or filmmakers, maybe the point is to share and create joy for others, and part of that is revealing a fundamental interconnectedness between people, places, and things. Everything might matter, even just for a moment; what a joy to remember that wonderful instant of your own life, which is contingent on everything else going on in the world and the lives of others.

After Life invites the audience to ponder their own happiest memories, and consider the difficulties of picking just one, or if there is even one thing worth picking. There’s always at least one.

I cried a lot during this movie—I’m embarrassingly crying in a cafe as I type this out—but there’s one shot that got me in particular. There’s a screening room where the deceased assemble to watch their recreated memories. These people that we have come to know in the film sit in the dark facing the screen. Kore-eda situates the camera at the front of the screening room, as if they are facing us, the audience watching them. The movie screen is the membrane between our world and the cinematic world, real life and the afterlife, the present and the past, the self and the other.

We are together in the dark, sharing a memory.

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wellthatjusthappend · 7 years

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Flicker Beat (2/2)

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Damian was sleeping soundly on the couch at last. Dick took the blood sample he’d drawn, separated it out into a couple test tubes, added drops, and set them spinning in a homemade centrifuge of sorts he’d thrown together. The baddies were always cooking up some chemical this or that and while a trip to the cave would be ideal, it wasn’t always possible.

Case in point.

The Abuse kid said something about it not affecting Alpha’s as much, which was weird to say the least. Hopefully after these samples settled properly he could get a better idea of what they were dealing with. Damian seemed to be already doing better, but that wasn’t the point. Someone had taken a good shot at his partner and it irked Dick that he hadn’t been there for him. Damian was very dear to him. If that dosage had been lethal…

Dick closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He balled up the wrappings from the tubes and went to toss them in the trash. Dick paused noticing an unopened package that was partially buried under the rest. It was flexible and had been squished up as much as possible. There was no return address, but Dick recognized Leslie’s spidery scrawl.

I know this is hard for you, but it’s not your fault. Please take them, they really will help.

Dick frowned opened the sack. Inside were a couple different bottles of medicine as well as a bottle of antidepressants. He wracked his brain trying to think if there was a reason Leslie would give these to him and came up blank. He’d call her after Damian was feeling better and try to figure why exactly these were in his trash. In the meantime he put time safely in his cupboard.

He heard Damian move around in the other room and hurried out of the kitchen again.

“Little D,” Murmured Dick kneeling by his side and feeling his forehead. No fever anymore, that was good, “How are you feeling?”

“Less than optimal.” grumbled Damian, jade eyes blinking open to stare at him blearily before scowling, “Colin, that traitor.”

“I’m glad he brought you to me.” Dick said firmly, “You didn’t know what you had been dosed with, it could have been very dangerous.”

“-tt-” Damian looked away. Dick wanted to hug him. He settled for stroking a hand through his hair affectionately.

“I’m really glad you’re here, babybat,” Dick admitted, “You have no idea how worried I’ve been.”

“Your worry was unnecessary. I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself,” Damian scowled. Dick was quite sure that if he knew how much he was pouting he’d stop immediately.

“You still shouldn’t have had to.” Dick said angrily, “You’re 14 years old, you should be having to carry adult burdens. Just because you technically can doesn’t matter. It wasn’t an ok for your Dad to do that.”

Protecting Tim was one thing. And an important thing at that. But turning your teenage son out of the house was another. Dick thought Bruce sometimes forgot Damian was actually child. He had a bratty attitude sometimes, but for the most part it wasn’t like he ever acted his age much. Still.

“So why would he do it?” Damian shot back, his angry tone barely covering an edge of hurt, “Why? I’m the blood son. Me. So why would he choose Drake over…?”

“Because even though Bruce is some of the smartest men I know, he’s also one of the stupidest,” sighed Dick helping Damian sit up a bit so the Beta could sit and he could lean against Dick’s chest, “I don’t think he meant for you to be gone more than an evening, but that still doesn’t excuse his behavior. I think he thought you would just agree to stop attacking Tim and that would be the end of it but he really should have known better. He knows you, after all. You’re both so stubborn.”

“I don’t understand. Drake already has everything. Why does he insist on always messing everything up?” Damian gritted.

“Wouldn’t you say though that everyone deserves a chance to feel at home in their own skin?” Dick asked.

“Don’t be idealistic Grayson, bodies were always meant to be cumbersome things.” Damian gave Dick a look like he was stupid.

“And even so, we still all try to find our place to fit.” Dick insisted, “Tim has found his. The pack is supporting him in that.”

“Colin would fit, if he could.” Damian said suddenly, Dick looked at him quizzically, “My- the person who brought me to you, Colin.”

“The Alpha.” Dick nodded, pursing his lips at the memory. He didn’t like that such a big aggressive Alpha had been just living with his younger partner. Dick wasn’t sure what to make of the fact that Damian was calling this- friend?- by his first name either. Damian didn’t call people by their first names.

“He’s not an Alpha.” snapped Damian defensively, “He’s- he doesn’t fit correctly into the dynamics, but he would if he could! It’s not his fault. If he’s had a choice he would have and- And then there’s Drake, hah!”

Dick bit back a thousand things that came to mind in the younger Beta’s defense but he decided to let Damian vent for a little first.

“Drake fit before and now he’s just messing it up just because he feels like it. Dynamics matter. They’re everything you can’t just- you can’t just throw them out just because.” Damian tried to explain.

Dick let them sit in silence for a little before carefully asking, “If dynamics are everything, where does that put your friend Colin?”

“I don’t know.” Damian admitted sounding distressed.

“What if your friend decided he wanted to fit? He’d have to go do some of the same kinds of things Tim is doing.” Dick let that sit, “If, say, he decided to transition to being a Beta, would you consider him to not be a real Beta like you’ve told Tim over and over?”

“No.” Damian gritted out, “I am aware that makes no sense, but no.”

“Ah.” Dick felt a flicker of hope. He’d always kind of been worried Damian might never except Tim. But maybe…

“I don’t know what to do, Grayson.” Damian admitted quietly, then more loudly and frustrated, “These matters are supposed to be set and very clear. The rules are in place, and those with any ounce of integrity follows them. There a correct way of doing things for each dynamic that compliments each other. If you break for that there can only be chaos and heartbreak.”

Dick refrained from asking about what Damian thought of relationships outside of a potential bond or traditional Beta/Beta relationships. He was already aware Damian thought he and Jason were infidels. Still…

“If you want to talk about my take on it all, I’d be happy to share some of the insights I’ve heard.” Dick said slowly, “But it sounds like most of all you need to think about it all some more. Don’t just bottle it up and try not to think about it because it’s hard though.”

“I know that.” grumbled Damian wiggling close. Dick smiled to himself, knowing that Damian would deny snuggling till the day he died. It was hard to resist kissing his forehead, but he doubted Damian would tolerate it.

At first Dick thought that his throat was tightening up because he was emotional. But after a couple of times of trying to clear his throat unsuccessfully, Dick got a bit suspicious. Damian seemed fine though.

“One sec little D.” Dick said regretfully shuffling out from under the other.

“Where are you going?” Damian asked looking disgruntled at having to move.

“Just gotta check something.” Dick smiled reassuringly.

In the kitchen the centrifuge had long since stopped spinning. Dick’s eyes widened at the way all of the tubes had separated and were reacting really concerningly. It didn’t say great things about whatever this new drug was.

One of the samples wasn’t sealed properly.

He started to reach for it and became aware that his hands were shaking. Hard. And more by the second. And the room was starting to pulse in an alarming way.

“Dami-!” Dick tried to call but it came out a concerning weeze. He couldn’t breathe. And everything was- everything was-

Black.

*****

“Pennyworth! Please! Grayson has-” Damian started frantically pulling the Beta far away from the sample in the kitchen.

“I’m on my way.” Alfred began to say before Damian’s brain caught up to the situation.

“No!” He said, “Stay away. And keep Drake away too. This is a drug that only affects Beta’s, we can’t have you getting exposed as well. I’ll call the ambulance, you inform the rest of the pack.”

“As you say.” Alfred said, strain evident in his voice.

“I need you to send an ambulance. Do not send any Beta personnel,” Damian said briskly dialing 911, “My packmate has reacted to the drug called Flicker. He is no longer breathing. My address is 54th St and Adams. West Gotham, apartment 731. I expect you to arrive promptly.”

Damian hung up before they could answer and focused on giving Dick CPR. He wasn’t sure it was doing much but his brain was filled with statistics and facts about the brain starting to die after 6 minutes without oxygen.

“Grayson, you fool, you’re not allowed to die.” Damian told him, “Especially not because you were caring for me.”

The ambulance's arrival and the ride to the hospital was a confusing panicked blur. Damian tried to keep track of who was doing what and why but it was chaos.

“Stop! Where are you taking him?” demanded Damian when they tried to take the Beta away from him.

“Don’t worry kid,” one of the attendants smiled wearily, “We’re getting real good at treating Flicker victims. Your packmates going to be fine. We just need to take him for a few.”

Damian reluctantly sat back and channeled his worry into rage for the fools who dared to hurt his pack and what he planned to do to them.

“Damian!” Damian turned as his name was called to see Tim running up.

“You shouldn’t be here-” Damian started angrily. Regardless of what Drake really was, right now physically his makeup was closer to that of a Beta than an Omega which meant he could be at risk. They weren’t sure exactly what it was people were reacting to after all.

“It’s fine,” Tim waved him away, “If it was loes in the hospital then Beta’s would be collapsing left, right, and center.”

“-tt-” Damian turned away.

“Tell me what happened.” Tim said intently, and Damian knew in that moment he was dealing with Red Robin. That was fine. He always dealt better with him than Tim.

Damian explained all about the gangs and the drugs and about getting dosed and not knowing that Dick had taken a sample so he hadn’t thought to warn him about any potential dangers. Tim was frowning deeply by the time he finished. Tim nodded and quickly sent out a series of texts.

“No one can seem to get ahold of Jason, but Barbara is going to Dick’s place to get his samples. We’ll have an antidote of our own soon enough.” Tim said

“Todd is going to go on a rampage when he hears.” Damian said dryly. The grimace Tim made said he agreed.

“Where is Dick?” Tim asked, “How is he?”

“In there.” Damian nodded to the doors.

“I’m going to go talk to them.” was all Tim said. Damian let him do it. He had no patience for people caught in bureaucracy and they would likely not appreciate him hurling them over the counter when they refused to cooperate.

“This doesn’t make sense.” Tim said looking troubled when he returned, “The drug has dramatic effects. Deadly if not treated. But it’s not hard to treat. They’re telling me that it rarely takes more than a day for Beta’s to get back on their feet. If this gang is targeting Beta’s, then it can’t be this simple.”

“-tt- Perhaps they got sloppy.” Damian said.

“No, they have to know by now that people can treat it easily but they’re still producing.” Tim said frustrated.

Damian shrugged and kept his eyes fixed on the door. He and Tim sat in silence, Tim occasionally tapping away at his phone. It was the first time they’d seen each other since their fight. Damian expected to feel more resentful, but he couldn’t muster it in the face of Tim’s palpable worry about Dick.

A commotion by the entrance made Damian look up to see Jason shoving his way past personal with Colin trailing worriedly behind him. Both Damian and Tim were on their feet in an instant.

“Are you ok? Should you be out here so soon after-” Damian went straight for Colin.

“I’m fine, Jason said I already stopped scenting and I’m feeling better than usual since he was taking care of me.” Colin said quickly. Damian started to feel jealous at that but-

“Where is he?! Where the fuck is he?!” Jason yelled.

“Jason-” Tim started to lay a hand on his arm but Jason shook it off.

“No, fuck, you need to let me see him right this fucking second!” Jason spat, his eyes wild and feverish.

“Sir, calm down,” a nurse tried to calm him, “If your mate is somewhere here than I assure you that we can take you to him. The Alpha ward is this way if you’ll-”

“I’m not going to no fucking Alpha ward.” Jason snarled, “My mate’s a Beta.”

“Oh,” She blinked rapidly, “Um, well, technically then you’re not m-”

“He was just admitted here for unintentionally exposure to Flicker?” Tim cut in with a charming smile before Jason could lose his already frayed temper, “Could you tell us if his procedures finished?”

“Flicker? Oh, well that procedure should have been finished a while ago, it’s really quite quick. We don’t take names upon entrance since patients usually wake up again fairly quickly to tell us themselves. I can see if he’s in the system?” she said stepping behind a computer, “What’s his name?”

“Dick Grayson.” Tim said while Jason muttered things under his breath. Colin took Damian’s hand and squeezed it comfortingly.

“Hmm, no one here is by that name.” She hummed, “Can you give me any other descriptions?”

Tim listed off several more.

“I’m sorry, you’re sure he’s didn’t already check himself out? Flicker patience do that sometimes. The only Beta’s here for Flicker are in their teens.” she asked.

“You.” Jason rounded on Damian grabbing his shirt, “Why didn’t you stay with him?”

“I wasn’t permitted to-” Damian began to spit defensively.

“When the fuck has that ever stopped you?” snarled Jason, “You knew Beta’s were disappearing after taking this drug, why the fuck would you let him out of your sight for a second?!”

Damian felt very cold.

“Oh god.” Tim breathed, “Oh god, that- that’s very clever. They could just- and nobody would probably notice- oh god.”

“I’m going to go fucking find him.” Jason said spinning on his heel.

“I- I’ll keep looking for clues here.” Tim said shakily turning back to the front desk.

“Wait, just like that? You guys really think he’s gone?” Colin asked worriedly.

“If he’s here, Drake will find him soon.” Damian said trying to breath through- Dick, no, they couldn’t have taken Dick. Not the one person in the family who- “But if they have taken him we’ll only have a short window to intercept them.”

A window that may have passed.

“Damian, I need you here with me.” Tim said apologetically as Damia started toward the door with Colin, “you’re the one who was with him and might be able to identify those who brought him in.”

“Colin, you go help Todd. I’ll remain here with Drake.” Damian said pushing his friend towards the door, “You have the best nose out everyone besides Jason. See if you can track him down.”

“Are you sure?”

“No.” said Damian in frustration, “Now go.”

With one more cautious look, Colin took off.

“We’re going to find him,” Damian said turning back to Tim, “We must.”

#angst #my writing #my bondless love series #alpha/beta/omega dynamics #drug mentions #transdynamic character #interdynamic character #cliff hanger #start of reconciliation

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pollaidh · 7 years

Text

In-line meta 221B just before the hug

221B Scene. Discussion between John and Sherlock. End of TLD.

SHERLOCK: “Perhaps the drugs opened certain doors in my mind.” (Like closet doors, last time he took drugs, in TAB.) … “Intrigued.”

JOHN: Makes dismissive/semi-humorous comment showing Sherlock John’s care for him is merely duty, a duty he is sharing with others.

SHERLOCK: “I thought we were just hanging out.” The softening of Sherlock’s gaze at the end shows this is the truth. He wishes they were just hanging out, but he thinks John’s there out of duty, not because he wants to be. Reinforces this with: “I do think I can last 20 minutes without supervision.” (Duty again. The tiny self-deprecating smile at the end. He’s hoping John will joke back as usual, continue their old camaraderie. He’s setting up for a private joke, but John doesn’t respond.) Just says -

JOHN: “If you’re sure.” Doesn’t meet Sherlock’s eye, his gaze is straight ahead until the last second.

JOHN: Makes comment about going to Rosie.

SHERLOCK: (Voice soft). “I should come and see her.” (Beseeching look.) Unusually subdued. Ah yes, Rosie is the most important to him now. And instead of throwing out some joking, petulant statement, he calmly accepts he no longer can come first to John. The subtext: Do you still want me to be part of your life? Sherlock looks at John as John talks with head-Mary. John unsure how to take this - does Sherlock seriously want to spend time with Rosie?

JOHN: Gives an unwelcoming yes. He’s not engaging.

SHERLOCK: Looks away. How to make him stay, how to get this back on the old footing? He taps his hand on side of mug - frustration, indecision. Pleased he has found something to say, he looks up. The case. Yes. John’s always interested in the case. That’s why he’s interested in Sherlock, for the excitement, the two of them fighting crime together.

SHERLOCK: Starts in his light professional voice to discuss case. John isn’t thawing. Sherlock trails off with a little laugh. He’s nervous.

JOHN: “That’s good.” (Low intonation at end, shutting down this conversation. Might as well have said ‘that’s nice.’)

(This part of the scene, the stops and starts, and averted looks, talking about anything but the real story, reminds me of the Mr Darcy meets Lizzie Bennet scene in the Colin Firth version: A couple who are in love but don’t know they are in love, have argued, and see each other again in difficult circumstances, don’t know what to say to each other, or how the other feels.)

JOHN: Clenches hand (sign of John’s stress that Sherlock must have picked up on over the years).

SHERLOCK: Looks to his tea. This isn’t going well. John is upset. John is leaving. He’s going to have to go deep.

SHERLOCK: “Are you okay?”

(Such a loaded question. This isn’t ‘how are you?’ as a greeting or a post-bomb check. His voice is raw, all pretence gone. He cares. It’s hard for men to get onto this plane of conversation. He REALLY cares.)

JOHN: Laughs, but returns.

SHERLOCK: Watches John’s reaction, accepts the anger he feels is his due. He knows he’s broken them so no smart arse comments, he doesn’t argue, he just accepts….

SHERLOCK: “In saving my life she conferred a value on it, a currency I do not know how to spend.” (Without you I don’t know why my life is. He earlier said he couldn’t commit suicide because of the value of his life to John, but he doesn’t know how to live if John doesn’t even want to be friends. He can’t live or die without John.)

JOHN: Still not forthcoming, but his choice of words “It is what it is” have deeper meaning for the audience. Could be interpreted by Sherlock as ‘tough, this is what we’ve got’.

SHERLOCK: Swallows. That’s all he’s getting. He’s glad to get that forgiveness (he thought he’d broken any feelings romantic/platonic John had for him. He can’t say anything here because John’s talking about Mary (on the surface), he’s still in love with her. Sherlock’s culpability (which he feels even if forgiven) means he can’t talk about her. He has no right.

JOHN: Back to his duty - he’s on the 6-10 watch. The meaningful moment is over.

SHERLOCK: Tears in his eyes. Bravado: “Looking forward to it.” It’s all he’s got left.

JOHN: “Yeah.” A blank little ‘yeah’ and an eye-roll. He’s not.

IRENE?: Text alert!!!

JOHN: Jealous.

SHERLOCK: Plays innocent. (Could he have set that up?) Starts analysing whilst John stalks back over. Why does Irene’s ringtone make him come back. John was always jealous of Irene. …

SHERLOCK: “Oh. Okay. That’s good.” (For John’s deduction. He has no idea what this will be, He’s wrapping a protective coat around himself. Complete change of tone - a subdued version of his own mocking tone. This tone last used when John asks him to be best man, and he really doesn’t understand what’s being asked. Eyes flicker, he’s analysing, possibly responding mentally. Sips tea at the end there too. (And why does he keep his birthday secret?) All very polite and formal between them.

JOHN: “Seriously, are we not going to talk about this?”

SHERLOCK: (This being him and John, or something else?) “What? (Doesn’t dare say anything leading.)

Clarify 2 X more. Normally Sherlock predicts what John will say but here he really doesn’t know.

JOHN: “Woman..”

SHERLOCK: Screws eyes shut. Seriously? FFS John, how dense can you be?

JOHN: Lots of subtext about losing chances, with a very hetero “mate” as last seen in TSoT.

SHERLOCK: WTF? How can John still think he’s in love with Irene Adler? He made this clear. He’s confused. Something he’s missing. Right. Revert to standard line. “Romantic entanglements, while fulfilling for other people…” (Is this because he thinks if John really thinks Sherlock’s in love with Irene, than all his assumptions about what is between them must be flawed.)

JOHN: Talks about chance. “Chances don’t last forever… gone before you know it.”

(Surface - about Mary, which means Sherlock can’t really respond. Also foreshadowing Last Problem. Subtext - he’s talking about chances between him and Sherlock, and telling unwittingly telling Sherlock to go for it.)

SHERLOCK: Eyes fall. This hits hard, He knows he’s lost his chance with John, back before he realised he loved him. This is an incredibly raw moment. Sherlock has a raw, earnest expression.

JOHN: Talks about needing someone who completes you and makes you a better person.

SHERLOCK: “Forgive me…... I can safely say..” You complete me, you taught me to be a better man. That’s what love is. You are the better man, and you taught me. Except he doesn’t get to finish what is basically a confession of love, unlike Culverton Smith, whose confession couldn’t be stopped.

JOHN: “I cheated.”

SHERLOCK: Utter shock. Did he really not know? Then he realises Mary’s in the room, in John’s head. How can he replace a dead person. It’s heart breaking watching John talk to his dead wife. Sherlock analysing - so he still sees her and talks to her, but he cheated. Sherlock calculating WTF is going on here?

JOHN: Confesses all to Mary, himself, and Sherlock. Subtext, despite Mary being the mother of his child, he still cheated. He was only with her for the baby, but even that couldn’t stop him wanting more.

JOHN: “But I wanted more.”

SHERLOCK: Analysing. More with Faith? Or more than he got from his relationship with Mary. More with Sherlock? This is the moment Sherlock starts to wonder if there’s still a chance. He raises a wondering gaze, dawning hope in his eyes. John wasn’t committed to Mary like he’d assumed. What does that mean? (Sherlock is probably never going to be great at understanding emotions, though he’s improving.

JOHN: “I still do.”

SHERLOCK: (With who?)

JOHN: “Not the guy you thought…”

(Surface level to Mary and Sherlock - I’m not a good guy. Subtext - I’m not the (straight) guy you thought I was. John’s equating good and straight because of internalised homophobia.) “I never could be.” (He’s always been this way - hmm that sounds familiar.)

JOHN: “But that’s the point…” You love warts and all.

SHERLOCK: Subtext: Sherlock can be loveable even though he’s not perfect. John could love Sherlock.

JOHN: “Who you thought I was is the man I want to be.” (2 levels - good man/straight man. Equating these is a sign of his internalised homophobia. And he’s telling the audience and Sherlock, that they have made false assumptions (that’s he’s straight).

MARY-in-John’s-head: “Well, John Watson, get the hell with it.”

(Emphasis on hell. John has seen Mary tell Sherlock to go to hell, so links hell with Sherlock. He’s telling himself to get the hell on and tell Sherlock before it’s too late.” What else could this refer to - the recovery at surface level (John, get the baby, come back to life), but it’s much much deeper. As John stares, Mary smiles and disappears. John’s two sides (the conflict between Mary/John in his head, AND his good and bad side, and his side where he loves women and side where he loves men). John is integrated again. He accepts himself, warts and all, good man and bad, and all parts of his sexuality.

JOHN: Sobs, overwhelmed. He has given himself permission to be the man he was always supposed to be, to love himself entirely.

SHERLOCK: Absolutely serious, raw, none of the usual jokes and mania or glee, just entirely genuine and natural, puts down his tea and slowly, quietly, goes to John to comfort him. (He presumably hasn’t heard Mary’s contribution in John’s head, only John’s side. So he only sees John admit to Mary that he cheated, that he’s not the guy they thought. He doesn’t know John has just told himself to go for it. He seems John overwhelmed with guilt, as he sees it, not relief.) THEY HUG.

Compared to the wedding hug, which was so awkward, like John teaching Sherlock to hug, this is so natural. Mr Homes knows exactly what to do. Sherlock still cautious. Not sure how he’ll be received, this is not the moment for any declarations. But the hand on John’s neck is possessive and intimate, and John lays his head against Sherlock’s chest.

SHERLOCK: Glances up at the sky (thank god? Is this right? Am I doing it right?) All he cares about is that John is hurting.

Like the scene at the end of TSoT when Sherlock deduces the pregnancy, leaving him to realise there’s no chance with John now, this is such a raw, open, tender scene. They are being honest with each other and within themselves. There are still some miscommunications to clear up, but they are born of love and waiting for the right moment.

#tjlc #sherlock #johnlock #john watson #tld #the lying detective #meta #tld hug

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chrisoncinema · 6 years

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The Year in Review: 2017 Honorable Mentions

Originally this post was just going to list my top ten films of the year and provide a brief commentary on the honorable mentions that didn’t make the cut but I got carried away with the latter and wrote way too much. So here’s a holiday surprise: a full summation of my year at the movies for you to enjoy as I work on my top ten list.

2016 Addenda

Silence and Paterson were two 2016 films that I was only able to see in early 2017. Had I been able to view them when they were first released, both would have made my 2016 top ten list (which never got a proper post but is accessible via my twitter) and both would have vied for spots in my top three. I highly recommend that everyone watch both films. They are both challenging films in their own ways. Silence is emotionally exhausting; moments of shocking brutality and quiet delicacy abound. It’s an examination of faith worth mulling over regardless of your worldview or philosophy because, in the end, faith is an emanation of our basic humanity. Paterson is similar to Silence in its singular voice and vision. It is meandering, seemingly plotless, and deceptively simple, but sometimes one has to walk slowly in order to see clearly.

Films I Missed

As seen above, every year there are a number of films I am unable to see because I didn’t have time or it wasn’t playing in Michigan or I didn’t have the press credentials to get into a screening. This year, the most disappointing miss was Paul Thomas Anderson’s Phantom Threadwhich, apparently, didn’t make it to my local art theater. I’ve loved Anderson’s last three films (and enjoy his entire filmography, in varying degrees) and believe Phantom Thread would have made it onto my top ten list this year, had I been able to see it. Other films I missed this year, in no particular order, include: A Quiet Passion, The Post, Menashe, The Shape of Water, Three Billboards Outside Ebbing Missouri, I Tonya, Menashe, Graduation, Manifesto, Dawson City: Frozen Time, Call My By Your Name, and The Square.

Honorable and Dishonorable Mentions

Despite missing a lot, I saw more films this year than I have in a long time. This meant that my top ten list was an enjoyable challenge and that a number of films, for a variety of reasons, didn’t make the cut. These are their stories…

Lemon was the worst movie that I saw this year – or, at the very least, it was the movie I disliked the most that I watched all the way through nonetheless. The anti-comedy antihero that Tim Heidecker played to cringey perfection in the weird and wonderful The Comedy should be hereby retired with Brett Gelman’s new film. I think Brett Gelman is a very funny comedian and his wife, Janicza Bravo, who directed Lemon has a unique enough directorial voice but, in a year of terrible men, we didn’t need this one. In a year of interesting commentary on race, we didn’t need this half-hearted, cynical, frustrating attempt.

Lemon

I swore off comic book movies years ago and have only watched DC movies out of morbid, masochistic curiosity (I did not see Wonder Woman or Justice League, for the record, and don’t plan on ever watching them). That said, the first superhero movie to pique my interest in years was Logan. I hadn’t seen an X-Men movie since First Class, which I found rather pointless, but, as a childhood fan of the X-Men comics, something about Logan seemed different. And indeed it was.

Logan works incredibly well as a neo-Western road movie that happens to feature mutated humans with superpowers. Hugh Jackman is probably the best actor to ever lead a comic book movie and here he finally has a movie that is worth his time. The three leads that form a quasi-familial unit in the form of Patrick Stewart, Jackman, and young breakout Dafne Keen, all perform incredibly well together and individually. The movie falters when it tries to introduce its villains and an action-y plotline. The dude with the Anakin Skywalker hand was sufficient, the evil doctor guy played by Richard E. Grant was introduced too late to matter, and the robo-Wolverine or whatever he was called was just kind of awkward and weird and dumb. Still, I was genuinely moved by the end of this movie – brought closer to tears by this movie than any comic book movie I’ve watched. It’s not a great film, but it’s a very good comic book movie. Count it among the few classics.

Another movie that I was surprisingly moved by was Okja. I felt like I had this film’s number from the start. Not that predictability is inherently negative, I just didn’t think I’d get that much out of it. But this movie is incredibly well-crafted. The performances from Jake Gyllenhaal and Tilda Swinton are so over the top that they actually work as caricatures of evil people. This movie feels like a live-action anime. It has the energy, the flow, and the colorful cast of characters. The message is simple and perhaps a bit obvious but it works. And while I will continue blaming it on the severe cold I had while watching the film, I did get choked up at the end. Also, Paul Dano continues to be a tragically underrated performer who needs to be cast in way more projects.

Okja

Okja was very good at world-building and, unsurprisingly, Blade Runner 2049 was great at it. I was wary of this film going in and didn’t even know if I’d ever watch it – tired as I am of reboots and unnecessary sequels. Much to my surprise, though, I was captivated by this movie when it was simply following Ryan Gosling’s K through his detective work and personal life. His relationship with his holographic girlfriend is as weird and sweet and inventive as Her. Denis Villeneuve is a director I’ve written about beforewhose work I enjoy – Arrival remains his best film. Roger Deakins, as widely reported, does great work as he always does in this film. Unfortunately, 2049decided to be a legacy act. The second half of the movie is bogged down in a plot that ties the film in with the original completely unnecessarily.

2049 falls apart when it dredges up old Harry Ford in his all-too-ordinary gray t-shirt. Is he playing Rick Deckard or is he someone’s aging stepdad? Credit where it’s due: Harrison Ford performs dutifully and effectively in this movie but 1: I can’t watch Harrison Ford in a movie anymore without it completely taking me out of the narrative (Oh look, it’s ancient curmudgeon Harrison Ford. Remember Indiana Jones?) and, more importantly, 2: there was no reason why this film needed to bring him back. As I said, there were so many interesting directions this film could have gone but, like The Force Awakens, it grinds to a halt so we can see Harrison Ford react to stuff related to a movie he was in a hundred years ago. Also, Jared Leto is a scenery-chewing nuisance who should not be cast in anything ever. My suggestion: if you didn’t see this movie in IMAX, just wait and watch the 90 minute version I’ll inevitably make in 2018.

And while Blade Runner and Star Wars provided science fiction fodder for franchise devotees, horror fans were treated to a vast array of unique offerings. A horror/drama that got a little over-hyped for me was Raw. As with most gross-out horror films, there were early reports of people passing out and throwing up in screenings. With that in mind, I prepared myself for something truly shocking and was, honestly, somewhat disappointed. The story centers on a college freshman who discovers she has a hunger for human flesh. It’s a fun film if you’re a fan of body horror but even so the scenes get rather formulaic. There’s some great, atmospheric stuff in this movie, including some solid cinematography, but the moments when something gross is about to happen are never a surprise. Raw's great failure is its ending which ties such a deliciously messy story together too neatly.

Raw

Another horror film that could be accused of receiving too much early hype was, of course, mother! This movie is incredibly effective as a comedy of manners. Darren Aronofsky does an amazing job of capturing the panic and confusion of actual nightmares where you know the people populating your dream should be able to hear and understand you but their blank, unresponsive stares simply add to the horror. I had no idea what mother!was actually about or where it was going while I watched it and I found myself disappointed in myself once I realized. The thing is, though, even when the film’s narrative fully commits to its pedestrian eschatology, it’s still churning out moments that are absolutely bonkers. The ways mother! doesn’t work might be more interesting than the ways it does (Javier Bardem and Michelle Pfeiffer are particularly effective; Jennifer Lawrence remains an amateurish performer) but…I kind of loved this film in all of its sadistic, messy glory.

I really wanted mother! to make it into my top ten list simply because it felt so different. That is, until I saw another film about the dismantling of domesticity: The Killing of a Sacred Deer. I should state for the record that I was not a huge fan of Yorgos Lanthimos’s last film The Lobster. That film always felt a bit obvious and stunted to me – though I’m a big fan of both Colin Farrell and Rachel Weisz. Sacred Deer is a similar beast. The deadpan, monotone dialogue takes a lot of getting used to and I’m sure it’ll be a sticking point for a lot of viewers. It remains an interesting and puzzling choice by Lanthimos who seems to want to strip his films of melodramatic artifice while writing screenplays that contain the drama of Greek tragedies.

Sacred Deer is a film that knows it’s weird, knows you think it’s weird, but also knows it’s weirdness is making you feel weird. If you can let yourself get into it, this is a pretty rewarding film reminiscent of The Shining (I know this is blasphemy but I actually like it more). Colin Farrell and Nicole Kidman both give incredibly performances with what is surely challenging material to work with. The film’s real star, though, is Dunkirk breakout Barry Keoghan. As his character grows more strange and sinister, he somehow becomes even more magnetic. Regardless of what you think of the movie, Keoghan is one of the best performers of the year.

The Killing of a Sacred Deer

Of course, one cannot discuss the year’s horror films without mentioning Get Out. I have to admit I had trouble with this film for a number of months. I really struggled to see what everyone else was seeing in it. That is, until I watched Detroit. Both films are ostensibly horror flicks where the great evil is white power. Kathryn Bigelow’s film posits itself as a visceral work of journalism but beneath that facade, it’s clear she has nothing to say. Her camera is in a constant Paul Greengrass-esque tremor whether it’s a tense moment or not. Detroitis false immediacy. Detroit is torture porn. Get Out, on the other hand, has a voice and it came to make a statement. Get Out, like They Liveor Night of the Living Dead before it, is not high art. It is, for better or worse, a reaction to the sociopolitical milieu that surrounds it. Hopefully it will soon be considered the first of innumerable, blockbuster works by filmmakers of color that invades the cultural consciousness. For now, Get Out is a film that manages to be both scary and funny thanks to Jordan Peele’s vision and direction.

Logan Lucky and Baby Driver were two films by directors whose work I enjoy and admire immensely that just didn’t quite bring enough to the table to make it into a top ten list. Both films are self-assured, fun, and full of magnetic characters (save for the titular Baby) but they also seem to be exercises in style over substance. Still, I’d recommend both films in a heartbeat.

Another film that comes highly recommended by yours truly that seems to have been completely forgotten is The Red Turtle: an animated, nearly-wordless folk tale about nature, love, and letting go. The Red Turtle is refreshingly simple and unassuming – I’ve heard it described as a children’s film and, while a patient child may be able to sit through it, there’s a depth and maturity to the story that will speak to anyone who would stop to listen. Come for the animation, stay for the beautiful score and sound design.

The Red Turtle

Speaking of design, a couple films that look incredibly good are A Ghost Story and The Beguiled. Both films held spots in my top ten list but were knocked out. I really wanted to love A Ghost Story – I felt like I was really giving it my all – but about two thirds of the way through the film, it starts to preach about what it is and some of the mystery and nuance is lost. Visually, it remains one of the most interesting films of the year, but the story remains half-baked. The same could be said for Sofia Coppola’s new film. It features some of the best cinematography of the year and incredible performances from everyone involved. The aforementioned Colin Farrell and Nicole Kidman give it their all; Kirsten Dunst is strong as ever; and Elle Fanning continues to prove she is one of the great young actors working today. The film’s only real fault is its table manners. Reserved and cautious, when the film finally boils over, the room has already chilled.

I also saw The Florida Project this year. I have very little to say about it, apparently. As I’ve been putting it off through this whole post. I thought it was…fine. It’s good, not great. Willem Dafoe is very good in it. If you want to know how I feel about the ending, I’m in the camp that thought it completely undercut the emotional depth and complexity that the film was just about to reach.

So there you have it – my year at the movies, save for my upcoming top ten films of the year. As I said above, many of these films could have, or perhaps should have, been in my top ten list. And if you were to ask me in a few months, some of them might return. As these things go, art is subjective and fluid, but I’m very excited to share the films that I found the most engrossing and moving this year. Some will be obvious, but hopefully some will be new discoveries for you. Come back New Year’s Eve to find out!

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