#haha yeah i hope you are having a great November and enjoy this piece!! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hokusu · 1 year

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jdfhg;seghjr I can't remember the last time I actually kept up with an anime that was airing. I try every season there's something I want to be watching but I always end up falling behind... and don't even get me started on keeping up with giffing stuff lmao it's been years since I've been able to do that. I remember having a lot of fun when I was able to keep up with that stuff but it's a distant dream these days haha thanks for your words of encouragement!! ❤️ I hope the same for you~ ^-^

aaaahhhhh I love Trans-Siberian Orchestra!! their "Christmas/Sarajevo" song is one of my faves~ I also really like "Wizards in Winter"! hmmm I don't know if I have a favorite xmas song, I love too many of them haha I have a whole playlist~ what about you, do you have any favorites? and yeah typically I do get a white Christmas! this year, it started snowing mid-November I think? I really do love snow and watching it fall and stuff but driving in it is a paaaaain. do you get them where you live? and are you a Christmas decorator? my family and I have always been huge into decorating, it's a big part of the season for me!

you have some great faves!! SNK and HQ!! are definitely up there for me too~ I don't know if I could ever actually get into One Piece just because of how long it is hegr;oasergh I know people are always like "take it slow!" and "read a little bit at a time!" but I honestly don't know if I'd be able to commit to it lmao

thank you for going so deep into your love for dabihawks!! I've always thought they made a really dynamic pair but you honestly brought them into a whole new light!! also AMEN about Hawks views being skewed!! I have seen so many bad takes about his character and so many people are so ready and willing to absolve other characters of their sins before trying to accept Hawks all because he killed Twice... like I've always really liked the LoV and thought they're really well-written and fleshed-out characters, but some fans out there who drag Hawks' character through the mud all because of what he did, going so far as to say he "wasn't acting like a hero" despite the fact that he was fighting for his own life against a VILLAIN who has done VERY BAD THINGS, and then go on to glorify Shigaraki?? I love Twice and I love Shigaraki but Hawks deserves so much better and I cannot tell you how much his mischaracterization gets under my skin...

I can't say I've been a HUGE Dabi fan, I mean I've always really liked him and I think he's always been my fave of the League, but I've never spent a whole ton of time delving into his character. but he's really started growing more on me recently! same with Hawks actually, back when he was first introduced I was kinda like "oh yeah he's cool and stuff" but nothing really stood out to me, but over time I just really started appreciating him more and he's definitely one of my faves now! honestly, I'm quite behind on the manga (although I've been keeping up with major story developments via tumblr lmao) but I think Dabi and Hawks are one of the bigger reasons I want to get caught back up... Bakugou has always been a fave of mine and his character development still really stands out to me and I think it's some of the best in the series, and I also really love Midoriya and All Might and honestly the relationship between those three has always hit a real soft spot for me.

I'm trying to get back into BNHA because I do still really enjoy it and I still love the characters, but I did really fall out of keeping up with it. x_x talking about it with you is a lot of fun though!! makes me wanna go catch up right now haha

sorry again about the late response!! I'm trying really hard to be more punctual... I hope the length of my response is enough to cover some ground lmao (sorryagain) I hope you've been doing well~!! 💕

~your animanga secret santa❤️

Hello Santa!

Sorry for the later reply myself, just moved all weekend so I've been so tired 😩.

Sksjdkdjd omg I feel this in my bones too lol, I wish I had half the strength other editors do with always giffing right when a new episode airs 😭. I've only been able to do that when I try really hard for my favorites lOl and even then I'm a slow editor so I'll be lucky if I finish one set hahaha. But no pressure, as long as you're having fun editing when you are able to, who cares if it's late 😅. Which animes are you trying to watch this season? 👀

Ahhh!! "Christmas Sarajevo" is also my favorite song from them and the other one is very good too. *gonna listen to their songs now* lol. Tbh, I never really put together a Xmas playlist? I'm also a fan of covers of popular songs sometimes ^^ but I usually just pull up an Xmas radio station/pre-made playlist 😅 but I should make one now that I think about it...

Omg I can imagine driving in snow is a pain, or even having to shovel it. I live in a pretty warm place so it's never snowing here unless I head to the mountains sadly haha. 🥲 But that sounds so nice to be able to enjoy a white Christmas! Decorating (and food) is my favorite part of the holiday too!

HAHA the biggest hurdle for starting One Piece, is...literally starting 😂 and that was my problem for the longest time. Once you're in there you don't really think about it being so long, the characters have so much to love and the adventure is SO good, you just hope it never ends lol. It's pretty casual to begin and it's lighthearted so its nice to just wind down with me for lol, watch like a few here and there. Until you hit the point of pure screaming bcus the plot HITS SO HARD and you just have to know what happens next!! But for me that's one of the best parts too-- being able to binge heavily and still know there's more to look forward to. :'D I started like back in June and only have like 300ish episodes left 😭 so tbh I slowed down and took a break bcus I was sad to catch up lol. If you ever just give it a try instead of thinking of it as a long commitment, you might be pleasantly surprised. 😆

But I'm happy you like HQ and SnK too!! I wonder who your favs are there? And omg please same so much, any Hawks dragging I see is a hard nope! That's one of my biggest pet peeves in bnha fandom, seeing people stan the hell out of LoV (and like I like them and Dabi is my fav too), but then to hate Hawks? No way, he's been a victim all his life too...it's not like the HPSC gave him freedom. 😭

Or when people say he has "no character arc" or call him an "abuse apologist" (even tho he was always abused too wtf?) just bcus they see him trying to help endeavor, which lol someday I'm gonna write an essay about how it speaks way more about Hawks character and how he's projecting his own feelings than it does about Endeavor...after all Hawks still thinks HE'S the one in the wrong about turning his back on his abusive parents and he still apologizes about that. 😭 Sorry I'm so passionate about Hawks and when people misunderstand him bcus they don't get that someone who was trained all their life to be a certain way with an abusive traumatic past isn't going to just wake up and change one day? I think they're not even reading the same story.

Anyways! Please if Dabi & Hawks makes you want to catch up again, hell yeah I hope you enjoy and feel free to talk to me more about it lol. This season is also very good and paralled with what's going on in the manga is just perfect. Also ooh!! I used to think Bakugou is too hyped up and I didn't get it, but his character development esp when he finally genuinely apologized to Midoriya, was really satisfying and I like him a lot now!! Can totally see why their relationships are a fav for you! :)

And aww no worries Santa, always good to hear from you when you can and sorry my replies are also long 😭, but it's been really nice to talk with you too 💛💛

Take care dear Santa 💛

#ask #animanga santa 2022 #💛

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toxicpineapple · 3 years

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Well, this year is coming to a close!!! Here are my favourite writings from the year 2020 :)

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January:

“A penchant for looking at rocks”, the first ever Amamota fic I wrote (it’s been a long fucking year, haha) and another 5+1 things fic! Buckle down LGBTQ+ community because there are a lot of these, in fact I’m pretty sure I started off last year’s compilation with a 5+1 things fic? Anyway, this one was the five times Kaito helps Rantaro when he’s hurt, plus the one time Rantaro helps Kaito. I love me some good whump and I felt I had to choose this one because it’s one of my favourites just generally speaking.

Content Warnings: Injuries, tending to injuries, asthma attacks.

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February:

“Ibuki Mioda’s Kisses”, which I wrote for day fourteen of Femslash February. Boy, if I thought I wrote a lot in January, just take a moment to peek at February 2020… I was churning out a fic daily for the entire month. I don’t regret it though! I got to write a lot of characters who I haven’t written a lot, and explore a whole lot of prompts, and if I can remove my head from my ass I fully intend on participating in Femslash February again next year. Ibuki Mioda’s Kisses is the piece I wrote for Valentine’s Day, which was my two year anniversary with my boyfriend, so I wanted to write something special commemorating our relationship. No idea how I’m going to top that in 2021, but uh, check out the fic! It’s cute and I like to think it’s clever.

Content Warnings: The Mortifying Ideal Of Discovering Oneself, secondhand embarrassment, bad kisses. (I mean in the sense that texturally they’re just, unpleasant. It’s about asexuality, alright.)

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March:

“Adventure”, which I wrote for day five of Amasai Week, which was the first ship week I hosted and participated in in 2020! This was the longest piece that I wrote, and my favourite, just because I really really love the childhood friends trope, and I liked writing Shuichi and Rantaro as children, adventuring together and just having a fantastic time. Amasai Week actually took place while one of my parrots stayed overnight at the emergency vet after a fight with another one, so it was a pretty stressful time for me, but I’m proud of myself for completing it and looking forward to hosting Amasai Week again in 2020! Stay tuned, we’ve almost got the prompts worked out.

Content Warnings: None.

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April:

“A couple of ghosts”, which is the fic I wrote for Kaito’s birthday! I see we’ve reached the part of 2020 where I met my abuser, which, yaaaaay, but also, I’m still really proud of this fic, despite how much I kind of associate it with him now! It’s the fic where I said, y’know what, no, we can’t have nice things, and gave Kaito a horrible, traumatic reason for his fear of ghosts, as well as two dead parents. It’s Saimota though and there’s a cute hurt/comfort scene at the end so go ahead and check it out if you want.

Content Warnings: Car accidents, minor character death, injuries, PTSD.

---

May:

“Are you down to play?”, the fic that I wrote for day four of Saimota Week, wherein Shuichi has a secret and Kaito makes a bet with Kaede to figure it out. Man, if you thought I had bad associations with the fic I chose for April, look at this one, haha. But it’s objectively the best writing piece I uploaded that month, I’m really proud of my characterisation and the scenes in the fic, and hopefully someday I’ll be able to read this piece without thinking about him. :)

Content Warnings: None! This one’s just a fluffy feel good fic.

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June:

“Tamago kake gohan”, the Sonanami canon compliant hurt/comfort fic I wrote for my friend Void’s birthday. I put out a whopping three one shots in June because I’d really hit the swing of my roleplaying and hadn’t adjusted to it well enough to be writing fic at the same time yet, so, yeah. This one’s cute, though! Sonia is sad about Gundham and then Chiaki makes her some food. They’re sapphic.

Content Warnings: Canonical character death.

---

July:

“Good night”, the Amasai 5+1 things that I wrote for my friend Neb’s birthday! This is the five times Saihara slept in front of Amami, plus the one time Rantaro slept in front of Shuichi. It’s cute! They’re tender! It features the trope where you sleep in front of a loved one! I love that trope! And it’s Neb’s favourite so I had to go for it, hehe. These two are cute boys and they deserve to be happy.

Content Warnings: Breakdowns, nightmares. (But neither is from the narrator’s perspective.)

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August:

“Making that dream come true”, the royalty AU Kaede and Rantaro become friends fic that I wrote while I briefly hyperfixated back on my royalty AU. I got into another writing groove during this time so I actually have a lot of really good fics up from August (including Mutual Vulnerability… Amamotas I’m sorry to have cucked you like this that fic was so damn good) but this one was my favourite. I love writing in first person, and I love writing platonic relationships, and someday I’m going to write the multichapter that this fic sets up for.

Content Warnings: Arranged marriages, and something else but it’s a secret, shhh.

---

September:

“A lot of firsts”, the Harumami fic I wrote for the first day of Amami Week, which is a personal writing challenge that I did this year to celebrate the week leading up to Amami’s birthday. September was a really dry writing month for me, partly because of the roleplay stuff and partly because of personal issues, but I’m still proud of the heteroeroticism (heh) in this one. Maki and Rantaro have chemistry, what can I say.

Content Warnings: Stab injuries (not from Maki to Rantaro, please).

---

October:

“October 3rd”, the second fic I wrote for Rantaro’s birthday, and also the Oumami fic that I wrote for day seven of Amami Week. I’m a fan of most of the fics I wrote in October (I wouldn’t gift someone a fic I’m not proud of and most of the fics I wrote, including this one, were gift fics) but this one is my favourite just because of the introspection, and also because of the fact that I got to write Ouma, because he’s always so much fun. I enjoyed writing the two of them going back and forth and have another Oumami fic on the way so stay tuned, haha.

Content Warnings: None.

---

November:

“It is what it is”, the fic I wrote for day four of Amamota week, which takes place when Rantaro is an adult, and out at a bar with his friends, where he meets Kaito and goes for a walk outside. It’s a melancholic piece for sure, but I like capturing those vibes with my fics, and I got to write a group interaction which is always one of my favourite things to do. Amamota is my biggest comfort pairing and I’m glad that I got to host Amamota Week this year, because I enjoy those two so much. :) Great chemistry.

Content Warnings: Recreational alcohol use (everyone is drinking legally and tentatively responsibly), general sad vibes idk.

---

December:

Okay, honestly, I haven’t posted anything yet this month aside from a vent, and since the vent I posted talks about my eating disorder and it’s not really very good writing anyway, I don’t feel comfortable putting it on this list. I have a multichapter holiday themed Oumami fic on the way that I will hopefully finish before the end of the year, as well as a fic I’m working on for a writing and art trade that I ABSOLUTELY need to get off my ass and work on, so those will hopefully be out by the end of 2020.

But yeah, that aside, that’s the complete list of my favourite fics from 2020. It’s been a long year and I’m glad to have stayed a member of the Danganronpa fandom through it. I really appreciate all the friends I’ve made, and the fun times I’ve had while I’ve been here.

2020 has treated me pretty terribly, haha. I met someone who I really wish I could’ve gone without, and my health has suffered, and I’m hoping to be able to start my recovery properly in 2021. Guess if I have a new year’s resolution, it’s to let go of what he did to me and start trying to get better. So I’m going to work on it! I can’t say that I think 2021 is going to be anybody’s year, but maybe it’s not about what the universe has in store for us so much as it is about what we make of it.

I hope everyone who reads this has a wonderful new year, I love you all dearly, thanks so much for the support and the laughs, and I’ll keep on hanging around and spreading my Amami propaganda.

Someone has to, haha.

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berrynarrybanana · 3 years

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Mrs. Styles - Honeybee Extra

A/N: I would like to let you all know that I don’t know what happened here. I started writing at the beginning of my shift and I just didn’t stop and then bam, this happened? I have links to the outfit and other things mentioned in the fic below. I hope you enjoy the visual trip and the journey of this fic as it is a whirlwind ride. Please let me know if you enjoy this and please tell Harry to stop trying to kill me if you see him, kay? I love you all and I’m here if you need to talk!

Rental House | Outfit |

Word Count: 3k+

Warnings: Daddy kink, impreg!kink, roleplay

November 2020

The second the photos broke, I lost it.

Harry wearing a wedding ring on the set of his new film sent me reeling in a pit of lust and wanting unlike any other. I spent my entire afternoon clenching my thighs together and avoiding small talk with coworkers. I was meant to fly out on Friday afternoon to visit him for the weekend, but I was struggling to hold it together. The wedding band on his finger was taunting me from two thousand miles away and I was caving. Anna had no problem with me disappearing a little early, so long as I had my laptop with me and my articles submitted.

My flight was switched for Thursday morning instead of Friday evening as originally planned. I had to jump through some hoops to ensure no one actually saw me entering JFK or leaving LAX. Having pap photos taken of me would certainly ruin my surprise. I spent too much time hatching my plan for a group of sleazy men with camera’s to ruin it.

“Why are you dressed like that?” Harry rubbed at his eyes, his voice scratchy and his brain groggy due to the early hour. “You look like you’re going on a run.”

“I’m doing a bunch of errands for Anna today, so I decided to dress casual.” I shrugged, shifting around in my private lounge seat at the airport. “I’m waiting for a friend of hers to get off their flight before I take them into the office.”

“Thought you were hopping on your flight a little early to surprise me.” He pouted, his eyes shining under the dim lighting. “Made my heart race a little.”

“I wish I could, darling.” I said softly. “I miss you so much already and it’s barely been two weeks.”

“I know, it sucks.” He inhaled sharply, shaking his head. “Only one more sleep and then we’ll be together for the weekend.”

“I can’t wait, squid.” I said softly. “I’ll talk to you later today, okay? Don’t be upset if I can’t answer a text or anything, I’ll be so busy with Anna’s errands-”

“S’alright, honey.” He gave me a reassuring smile. “I’ll be on set so I might not be able to text as often either.”

“Alright.” I said. “I love you.”

“I love you.” He blew a kiss to the camera and I caught it, pressing my fingers to my cheek with a soft giggle. “Have a great day, honey.”

“You too, squid.”

After I hung up with Harry, I jumped into planning mode.

I already had the address to the rental house and a copy of the key. Harry had sent it to me the moment he got one himself just in case I ever wanted to come visit. We both knew that flight times and his filming schedule might not line up perfectly, so it didn’t hurt to have a key just in case I had to drive from LAX to Palm Springs on my own. I planned on stopping at the Malibu house to steal Roxanne from the garage. It would take me two hours and a half hours to get from Malibu to Palm Springs once I finally started my solo road trip.

As I switched over to a calming playlist that Harry made for me on my birthday, I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths.

I knew that it would be a fun trip, but I could only hope that Harry really liked his surprise.

****************************

The sun was beating down on my bare legs as I leaned against Roxanne.

I anxiously twirled the set of keys around my perfectly painted fingernails. I picked one of the most infamous shades from the 1950’s to match my hair, makeup, and outfit. I rubbed my painted lips together nervously, taking a shuddery breath as I watched the gate of the production set carefully. I thought that it was going to open four times before, but no one had stumbled off set yet.

They were all set to do a two hour lunch break today and that gave me plenty of time to do what I wanted with Harry back in his rental home. I spent most of my time getting ready there, following several tutorials on vintage hair and makeup before I dressed in my adorable outfit. It was something I saw on a show about a female comedian in the fifties. I adored her style throughout the whole show, but I really loved this outfit on me.

It was a pair of black and white check shorts with a matching, three quarter sleeve blazer. I went through Harry’s closet, in search of his ivory silk shirt that I’d seen him wear in a pap photo years ago, to add a little special touch to the outfit. It had his last name stitched on the pocket to compliment the fake wedding ring I’d slipped on my finger.

That was the part I was nervous about.

I didn’t want him to think that I was insane for finding a piece of costume jewelry to match his own fake wedding ring. I got the idea on the flight over from New York, my mind racing with ideas and scenarios to play out. I ultimately decided that if he could torture me with a wedding ring, then I could torture him with one.

The gate finally opened as I started to contemplate picking my nails, a loud screeching sound pulling me from my thoughts as I gripped the keys to the benz in my hand tightly.

Florence was the first out, and while I was delighted to meet the girl who was spending so much time with my boyfriend, I didn’t care to meet her just yet. I watched her turn back, letting out a charming giggle as my boyfriend followed suite behind her. Olivia Wilde was next, a bag on her shoulder and a wide smile on her face. A few other familiar faces trailed out after Harry, and suddenly, my nerves had skyrocketed. A lot of famous people were about to see me in a classic fifties get up with a car scarf around my curls and my legs exposed.

My nerves were soothed for just a moment as I looked at Harry’s freshly cut hair, slicked back in a style that I thought I would hate on him. As per usual, he looked like a daydream. My breath caught in my throat when he looked over at me, his eyes growing wide and a smirk pulling at the corner of his lips. Florence caught on to his line of sight, following his gaze until her eyes landed on me. I gave him a quick wave as everyone else turned to look at me and I felt my face grow hot. He pressed a quick kiss to Olivia’s cheek and then Florence’s before jogging my way.

“What the hell is all this?” He gripped my elbow gently, leaning down to press his lips to mine with a wide smile. “Beatrice, you look so good.”

“I know.” I hummed against his lips, brushing my fingers over his cheek. “Hi.”

“Hiya, honey.” He cooed, wrapping his arms around me. “Fuck me, you’re gorgeous.”

“I thought I’d do a little something to surprise you.” I wrapped my arms around his neck, tossing my head back when he pulled the scarf from my head. “Harry!”

“You did your hair and makeup, too?” He kissed my cheek. “Come on, I want you to meet Olivia and Florence. They’re going to love this.”

“I don’t want her to think I’m mocking her movie.” I glanced down at Harry, causing him to frown slightly. “I did it because I knew you would love it and I had a lot of fun dressing up, but I don’t want to offend her.”

“You won’t.” He reassured me. “She’ll probably make you an extra.”

“Shut up.” I rolled my eyes as he pouted. “Fine, I’ll go over there.”

“Thank you.” He set me down, grabbing my hand before tugging me along.

“Olivia, Florence,” Harry glanced back at me with a giddy grin. “This is my girlfriend, Beatrice.”

“Hello,” I stuck my hand out between us and they both went for a shake. “It’s really nice to meet y’all.”

“You too.” Florence beamed back at me with a smile that was almost as bright as the sun. “I just want to thank you for letting me borrow your boyfriend. He’s such a lovely person and a dream to work with.”

“Try baking with him, you’ll change your mind.” I squeezed Harry’s hand, letting out a soft chuckle. “He’s like a toddler when he gets in the kitchen.”

“I can’t imagine him in an apron.” Olivia laughed. “We have to see that.”

“I have pictures, I’ll make sure to give him a framed one for his trailer.” I pressed my lips together as Harry squeaked out.

“Alright, I didn’t think you’d all gang up on me.” He said playfully. “I wanted to show you off and here you are, teasing me for baking.”

“I’m teasing you because you steal the batter on a spoon, not because you’re baking. I love baking with you.” I bumped my hip into his, smiling up at him. “But I’ve got to keep you grounded, don’t I? Your head will inflate and I’ll have to tie a cinder block to your foot to keep you from floating off.”

“Haha, you’re so funny.” He scrunched his nose up and I tossed my head back, letting out a loud laugh. “Anyways, what do you think of her outfit?”

“Oh, Harry, don’t-”

“It looks great, actually.” Olivia said. “Did I see that on the set of the Marvelous Mrs. Masiel?”

“Yeah, you did.” I nodded. “I love that show and all of her outfits so much.”

“It looks adorable on you.” Florence said. “You work for Vogue, don’t you?”

“Yeah.” I nodded. “I did a piece with one of your Little Women co-stars not too long ago, actually.”

“I thought you seemed familiar.” She exclaimed. “You came on set one day, didn’t you?”

“I did.” I nodded. “It was an honest to god, out of body experience for me. I loved Little Women so much as a girl. I seriously wanted to change my name to Josephine after reading it.”

“And then the film was so bloody amazing!” Florence exclaimed. “Harry, why have you kept her away from us for so long?”

“S’not my fault she has a job.” He rolled his eyes, chortling playfully. “I tried to convince her that being a housewife was much more fun, but I think she read the script and decided against it.”

“Yeah, I sure did.” I laughed softly alongside Olivia and Florence. “We should do dinner or something this weekend. I don’t know if you all have plans, but Harry’s rental house has a table that seats like, eight people.”

“That sounds wonderful.” Olivia said. “Just let us know the details and I’ll pass it along to the other main actors.”

“Sounds great.” Harry said. “Well, I’m going to steal my girl away if you don’t mind. I’ll see you in two hours?”

“See you then, Harry.” Florence waved before she took off in the direction of her car. “Bye, Beatrice!”

“Bye, Florence.” I waved back at her with a giggle before turning to Olivia. “It was really lovely to meet you. I’ll make sure to get him back in time.”

“Thank you.” She laughed. “Have a great lunch, you two.”

“Thanks.” Harry and I said at the same time.

When Olivia was gone, Harry looked down at me with a smirk.

“Do I get to fuck you now?” He asked, his dimple popping out.

“It depends.” I said slowly. “Would you, by chance, like to partake in a little role play?”

“It depends.” He said back. “What do you have in mind?”

I walked forward, smoothing my hands over his t-shirt covered chest. I pressed up on my toes, bringing my lips as close to his ears as I could get them.

“Do you still have your wedding ring from set?”

********************************************

“Honey!” I heard Harry’s voice from where I was lounging on the sofa, a magazine draped over my thighs. “I’m home.”

I smiled, flipping through my magazine without actually paying attention to it.

I heard Harry’s footsteps moments later, his dress shoes tapping along the concrete floor of the house. I tilted my head up when he moved in front of me, his eyes trailing over my body.

“You look comfortable.” He said, reaching for my magazine with two fingers. “You didn’t answer when I called out for you.”

“Sorry, darling,” I hummed out when he pressed his lips to mine. “I was invested in an article.”

“You and your articles.” He breathed against my lips. “It’s been ages since I’ve seen you. Are you just going to sit there?”

“I was planning on it, sweet pea.” I brushed my thumb over his bottom lip. “I’m relaxing my feet.”

“Now, I’ve been gone on business for six days, honey. I would like the chance to properly greet my beautiful wife.” He smirked, setting his briefcase to the coffee table behind him.

“Mr. Styles,” I twisted my legs off the couch, standing up between the furniture and Harry. “I don’t know what you’re insinuating, but I’ve got far too much to get done today. I’ve still got grocery shopping to do and well, I have to call your Mother.”

“I have a better plan, doll.” He roughly gripped my hips, his fingers digging into my sides harshly as he yanked me against his chest. “How about we sneak off for a little afternoon delight?”

“Harry Styles, I don’t think so.” I mocked offense, swatting his shoulder. “I’m far too busy.”

“Make time for your husband, honey.” He cooed, brushing his knuckles against my cheek gently before he gripped my chin. “Make love with your husband.”

“Mr. Styles, you do drive a hard bargain.” I whispered, my breath catching in my throat as our eyes connected in a lustful gaze. “I do have something I’ve been wanting to show you.”

“Mrs. Styles, what have you been up to while daddy’s been away?” He hummed out as his lips brushed against my red painted lips. “Have you been naughty?”

“No,” I smirked. “I’ve been an angel.”

“Prove it.” He whispered moments before our lips collided.

He kissed me just like they did in the old movies, his body wrapping around mine. I moaned against him when I felt his tongue slip over my own, giving me a taste of what I had been craving for two weeks now. I let out a giggle and then a squeak of surprise when I felt his hands under my bum, lifting me up into his arms. I wrapped my legs around him, holding on tight as he walked us from the living room towards the bedroom. He dropped me on the bed before grabbing my right ankle, holding my leg up as my ankle rested on his shoulder.

“These heels…” He started to fiddle with the clasp, finally pulling the strap loose before he slipped it off. “They’re new.”

“Just bought them.” I gripped the duvet under my fingers. “Do you like them?”

“Yes.” He kissed my ankle before gently resting my right leg on the bed. “Did you buy them with daddy’s money?”

“I did.” I bit my lower lip as my core clenched, my walls fluttering at his tone. “I bought them for you.”

“You didn’t even ask daddy before you bought them.” He tutted, reaching for my left ankle. “You’re getting bold.”

“I just wanted to surprise you.” I said.

“I’m very surprised.” He gave me a soft wink, one that let me know my Harry was still in this version of him that we’d quickly created in the car.

A business man with a daddy kink in the 1950’s that wanted to knock his wife up after a long business trip. It was a simple plot, but it combined quite a few kinks into one scenario, so we didn’t really mind. I giggled when he reminded me that daddy was a common nickname in that time period, something girls called their husbands in a provocative setting.

When both of my heels were off, Harry brushed his hands up my bare thighs until they landed on my hips. He gently guided me towards the center of the bed before kneeling over me. I lifted both hands up, cupping his cheeks as he leaned down to kiss my lips.

“Mrs. Styles,” He hummed out. “I’ve been thinking?”

“About what, Mr. Styles?” I pressed my lips over his cheek, sliding my fingers towards the back of his neck.

“I think it’s been quite lonely around here.” He said. “I can’t imagine you’re enjoying all of this time alone when I’m away on business.”

“I get by just fine.” I said softly, dropping my head back to the mattress. “Do you want to get a dog, Harry? Is that what this is about?”

“I don’t want to get a dog, darling.” He chuckled, brushing his nose over mine. “I want a baby.”

“A baby?” My eyes grew wide. “Isn’t it a bit soon, darling? We’ve only been married for five months.”

“That’s more than enough time, doll.” He whined. “I want us to have a beautiful little baby to love and to dote on. I want to show her off in front of my friends and my family-”

“Oh, Mr. Styles.” I sighed, shaking my head. “Don’t you know I’d do anything for you, darling.”

“Is that a yes?” He smirked, his eyes lighting up.

“Yes.” I gasped out when he rutted his hips forward. “Please.”

He wasted no time, stripping me from my blazer and then my tiny shorts. He tossed them aside carelessly, his hands falling to the buttons on the silk shirt that I had stolen from our closet.

“S’this mine?” He glanced up at me with a confused smirk. “Haven’t seen this in ages.”

“S’yours.” I nodded, holding the lapel to the side to show off his name. “S’got your name on it and everything.”

“Cheeky girl.” He cooed out, dropping his head to press a kiss to my stomach. “It’s our name.”

I let out a low whine in the back of my throat, shifting my hips as Harry made it to the last button towards the top of the dress shirt. I watched his face carefully as he pushed it to the side, his eyes scanning the black, vintage set that I had purchased for today.

“You’re trying to kill me.” He gasped out as his fingers brushed over the skin of my stomach to my breasts. “Fucking….I can’t take this anymore. I need to be inside of you.”

“Then get inside of me, Mr. Styles.” I lifted my legs, spreading them apart slightly so he could see the cut out area on the crotch of the panties. “You don’t even have to take everything off.”

Harry’s eyes were on mine, burning a dark shade of emerald as he licked over his bottom lip. I giggled when he started to unbuckle his trousers, tanking the zipper down before he tucked his hand in. He pulled his cock out, giving it a few firm strokes before he hovered his body over mine. Seconds later, I felt the stretch of my walls around his cock, causing my body to tense.

“There’s my girl.” He grunted out, pushing himself in as far as he could possibly go before pressing a few, sloppy kisses to my face. “So snug around me, aren’t you?”

“Harry.” I dropped my hands to his back, digging my nails into the cotton of his shirt as he pulled out slowly. Seconds later, he was pushing back in and I was gasping for air. “Fuck, that’s nice.”

“Mrs. Styles, you have such a filthy mouth.” He smeared his lips over mine before both of his hands found their home by my ears. “Who taught you to talk like that?”

“You.” I let out a breathless chuckle that quickly faded as the tip of his cock massaged my g-spot.

“Yeah?” His eyelids fluttered shut as he continued to work his hips in a steady rhythm. “No other blokes have been hangin’ round here?”

“None.” I shook my head as my nails drug down to his lower back and eventually to his bum. I pushed my fingers down his pants, digging my nails into the flesh there. “Just you.”

“You’re my girl.” He gritted out as a single curl fell to his forehead. “Only mine.”

“Only yours.” I whimpered, biting at my lower lip. “You feel so good, Harry.”

“Can’t wait to see you pregnant, honey.” He let out a whine of his own, clenching his eyes. “It’s gonna be so beautiful, seeing you round and full while you carry my baby..”

“I want it so bad, Harry.”

“And after this baby,” He let out a strangled moan, delivering another sharp thrust that had me gasping. “I’m gonna put another one in you, and then another.”

“Please, I want it.” I nodded, sliding my fingers back up his back. “Want you closer.”

He pressed his body into mine, his hips moving in desperate thrusts and his pelvis applying pressure to my clit with each move. I tossed my head back, silently asking for his lips to press against my throat. I felt him latch on as his thrust started to get sloppier. I knew that he was close by the little whines pulling from his throat and the puffs of air hitting my skin.

Harry’s hand slipped between our bodies in no time, rubbing my clit with an urgency that I’d never experienced before with him. I felt my body flush warm and my walls tighten around him as he delivered three final thrusts. We both cried out when he spilled into me, filling my walls with his cum until it dripped out onto the black panties still settled onto my hips.

“You bought yourself a ring?” our chests were both heaving, his body still pressed into mine.

I tried to let out a giggle, but he was heavy against my body and it came out wheezy.

“It’s costume jewelry.” I brushed my hand over his back. “Just thought it would be fun after I saw you wearing that ring on set. I saw the pictures online and they nearly killed me.”

“Mhm, you’re just trying to seduce me into proposing earlier than I planned.” He lifted his head, pressing his lips against mine in a sweet kiss. “Hello, honey.”

“Hiya, darling.” I lifted my hand, tugging gently on the curl that fell over forehead with a fond smile. “I love you.”

“Love you, too.” He whispered. “I love you and everything you do for me. I don’t tell you enough how much I appreciate you for being the best girlfriend out there.”

“Harry-”

“Don’t deflect or play it down,” He said sternly. “I mean every word from the bottom of my heart, Beatrice. I...no one else on set has had a spouse or partner come visit them on the weekends. No one else had flowers sent to their trailer or daily facetime calls and inspirational messages. You make me feel so loved and so special on a daily basis and that means the world to me. So thank you for being you, honey. I love you with all of my heart.”

“I love you, too.” I sniffled, blinking rapidly as a few tears fell down my temples, into my hair. “I hope you liked your surprise. I didn’t want to freak you out, but I thought it would be fun.”

“It was.” He brushed his nose over mine. “It was a lot of fun, actually. I think we should mess around like that more often.”

“Not too often, though.” I chuckled. “One of these days, I’ll actually end up pregnant.”

“Wheat’s wrong with that?” He hummed out.

“One step at a time, darling.” I patted his shoulder. “Oh, just so you know, we won’t be having a girl first.”

“Excuse me?” Harry hissed when I pushed at his shoulders, causing him to slip out of my walls. I guided him to his back before I climbed on top of him, pressing my palms to his tummy. “I don’t...what?”

“You said ‘her’ earlier, but we’re having a boy first.” I said casually. “I know it.”

“How do you know it?” He chuckled as his brows creased. “Did you make a deal with Stevie at one of her witch things?”

“I didn’t need to make a deal, I just know it.” I patted his cheek. “Gonna name him Ellis.”

“Why Ellis?” He tilted his head to the side. “Where did you hear that?”

“Ellis Island.” I smiled. “We took our first vacation together in New York and the ferry to Ellis Island was one of my favorite parts of that trip. It’s a piece of our history.”

“I love that.” He said softly. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” I giggled, leaning forward to press my lips against his. “Round two?”

“Why, Mrs. Styles, I like the way you think.”

#harry styles smut #harry styles writing #harry styles blurb #harry styles fic #harry styles X ofc #honeybee #extra

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cruecifymesixx · 5 years

Text

Love and Leather /part two/

Word count: 2.9k

A/N: holy fucking shit! A lot of you actually like this. I write long chapters sometimes so I hope that’s okay with everyone, if it’s a lot of reading let me know! I can try to cut it down. I don’t know where I’m going with this story, but that pretty much sums up my whole life :) feedback is always appreciated.

Warnings: Do I actually have to do these? Uhhh language, drug use, idk some other stuff too.

November 81’

“Vanity common! We’re gonna be late!” I ignored the banging on the bathroom door as I finished the touch up of my burgundy lipstick, “What? I’m finished.” I told Lucia, “Haha very funny! But don’t you look hot!” Lucia said and I smiled.

I looked down at my black platform boots that paired with my ripped black skin tight jeans, just too top it off with a deep red bralete that had rhinestones on the cup. “Why thank you, is Tonya ready?” I asked as I followed her to the living room of our three bedroom townhome in downtown LA.

“I am now!” She said as she finished downing a bottle of beer, we both laughed, “What! Less money I gotta spend on booze!”

“Cabs here!” Tony said while looking out the window. I grabbed my purse and we all left.

“Maybe he’ll remember you!” Lucia said rather hopefully, I just laughed, “I doubt it!” Tonya said, “Thank you! That’s more realistic.” I told her,

“But if he did! That would be so wicked!” Lucia said and I nodded and looked out the window,

I pondered of the idea of a rockstar remembering me, his waitress from over half a year ago. I chuckled at myself, and watched the passing lights of the city.

We arrived and the infamous whiskey a go-go, I looked at the marquee: “Mötley Crüe: a 3 night event” .

“Let me go talk to Jameson, so we can skip the line.” Lucia said as she walked over to the bouncer guarding the door...who also happened to be her flame of the month.

I lit a cigarette and took a puff, Tonya put her hand out and I shared it with her,

“Maybe we can score some blow tonight.” She said nonchalantly and I laughed, “You’re wild!” I told her, “Tonya! Vanity!” Lucia yelled for us and motioned for us to come.

We walked in and a huge of gust of cigarette smoke hit my face. People were against the walls making out, we made it through and saw an empty stage with people all around it,

“First round is on me.” Tonya said and she made her way through the crowd and to the bar, “Lucia!” Jameson yelled for her, “oh be right back!” She said, “please don’t leave....me.” There was no point cause I lost sight of her in the sea of people,

“Awesome.” I said under my breath, and wrapped my arms across my self and made my way to where the bathroom sign was. I jiggled the door but it was stuck, so I pushed some of my weight on it and stumbled into the bathroom,

“Get out!” A long blond haired man shouted at me, He had a woman naked in between his legs, “sorry!” I closed the door and laughed, then went into the other bathroom.

I checked myself in the mirror, and fixed my hair. But was startled when two men barged in and brought out a bag of white powder, “Sweets, you want in on this?” He asked me and I shook my head, “suit yourself.” He said and evened out a line on the bathroom sink i was standing by and snorted a line of it, “Woo!” He yelled and rubbed his face,

“How about a lady like line?” He asked me, and evened out a small line, I smiled at him, “Alright.” I told him and then held one nostril closed and snorted the line of coke. “Fuck.” I said quietly and rubbed my nose, “Fuck yeah girl! I’m tommy!” He loudly presented himself and stuck out his hand, “Vanity.” I said shaking it while beginning to sneeze.

“You seeing the show tonight!” He asked me. I couldn’t tell if it was the coke that was making him wired or if he was naturally like that.

“Yeah, me and my girls.” I told him and he held the door open for me, and I nodded at him, “I’m the drummer for the band!” He said closer into my ear, “oh the opening band!” I asked him and he laughed, “No babe! Motley fucking Crue!” He boasted while throwing up the rock and roll sign and sticking out his tongue,

“Oh! No shit! You’re Tommy Lee!” I said while remembering him from the posters out front, “The one and only!” He replied while fixing his make believe tie,

“Van! There you are! The shows about too...holy shit!!” Lucia said and started smacking my arm while looking at Tommy,

“I gotta go girls enjoy the show! Maybe we’ll see you after!” Tommy said and started walking backwards and then turned around the corner,

“I just did blow with him in the bathroom.” I said into Lucia’s ear, her eyes went huge, “girl! You’re fucking crazy! Tonya has our drinks.” She said and grabbed my hand and led me through the crowd.

We had a spot right up front by the stage I was standing by the amp and pulled out my Polaroid camera, “Lucia! Tonya!” I yelled and they posed behind me and I snapped a picture of us,

I shook it till it started to develop, “beautiful!” I shouted and put it into my purse.

Four guys walked on stage, the blonde one who I then realized was the singer walked up to the mic, “were Motley fucking Crue!” He yelled into the mic and the crowd roared and the girls screamed, they were bigger fans then I was.

A guy in black, skin tight leather pants was standing next to the amp with a guitar, I think that’s the bass player.

I looked up at him and his ice cold green eyes were already looking at me, well at my tits I should say.

That was Nikki.

They started strumming on their guitars and Tommy was banging the sticks onto the drums and the singer began yelling into the mic and the whole crowd broke loose. People were jumping, screaming and pushing everyone around, but I couldn’t take my eyes away from Nikki, something about him dressed in this almost dominatrix costume, with his messy black hair sprawled across his face, really got my heart racing, but then again...it’s just the coke.

My head was by the amp and it was deafening, my ears were gonna be ringing later. Tonya and Lucia looked like they were having a blast, and then Tonya lifted up her shirt and flashed the guys.

“Tonya!” Lucia yelled but then the singer reached down and put his hand on the side of her face.

And they say I’m wild.

An hour later, the music was dying down and everyone was beginning to calm down.

“Alright, thank you Los Angeles! We love you!” Vince, the singer yelled into the mic, Lucia informed me of who everyone was.

The guys began beating on their instruments and then Nikki took his bass guitar and slammed it onto the stage, making it disintegrate into pieces.

“Woo!!” He yelled and the crowd cheered for him, and then they all went through the curtain and too the back.

“I need to sit down.” Tonya said while going to sit at a table since the crowd immediately started leaving, “That was amazing.” She said while pulling out her handy inhaler and used it. I laughed, “You good, hell cat?” I asked her while adjusting her hair, “oh yeah, I’m amazing.” She said, “Lucia!” Jameson yelled and she turned around, “hi love!” She said as she pecked his lips, “Come with me girls.” He said and grabbed her hand, and we followed.

He led us through some corridors and then through two big doors and we were backstage and it was a full blown party. There was half naked women walking around and people were snorting drugs and drinking along the wall.

“I have a surprise for y’all.” He told us and my heart started racing, I think we were about to meet all of them,

Jameson opened a door for us and walked in....Mötley Crüe was no where in sight.

“It’s the opening band!” Jameson exclaimed while showing us, “God you idiot!” Lucia said and smacked him with her purse, “Let’s go.” Lucia said and I turned around and opened the door only to run into a guy and have a glass of beer spilt on my chest,

“Watch it, whore!” He yelled at me and I looked at his face. Green eyes, face paint was smeared, his hair was teased, “You watch it, Rockstar!” I yelled at him and he cocked his head to the side and squinted at me,

“Hey you were the girl with the tits in front!”

Tits in the front, not the waitress. So he didn’t remember me.

“Sorry for that uh...uh Mr.Sixx...she’s a feisty one.” Tonya said, “Yeah she doesn’t know what she’s saying! She’s high!” Lucia added on, “Lucia!” I yelled at her, “Vanity let’s just go...common.” Tonya said while tugging on my arm, and pulling me away

“Vanity...” He said slowly, and wrapped his strong hand around my bicep which brought me to a hault,

“Have we fucked before?” He asked me and I shook my head, “No. you don’t know me, I don’t know you. Thanks for the show it was great.” I told him, and tried walking away “Van! He remembers you!” Lucia said,

“Look at him, he’s coked out! he doesn’t remember shit!” I yelled at her, “Hey I’m right here!” Nikki butted in and grabbed my arm and forcefully made me turn around to face him,

“Get your hands off of me! You don’t get to touch me like that!” I said while sticking my finger in his face and his lips curled into a smirk,

“All right.” He said backing up and putting his hands up, “You came into our diner a while ago...before....all of this.” Tonya said while motioning to the chaotic scene around us four.

“Yeah! She was your waiter! We didn’t want to take you cause you scared us.” Lucia said and Nikki smiled and bit his bottom lip,

“Vanity Blackwood...that was the night I met Tommy....at uh...what is it.” He said while snapping his fingers trying to remember, “Ciprianis. Right?” He said and we all nodded,

“Well...you girls want to party?” His deep voice was smooth as he lowered his head to our height since he towered over us. The girls said yes but I was hesitant about it.

He opened the door, and I was immediately punched in the face by a thick cloud of marijuana. I have no idea how this many people could even fit into this room. Half naked girls were dancing all around while some found themselves whoring themself out to members of the band,

“What did you find Nikki boy!” Vince, the long blonde haired singer said while pushing a girl off of his lap and he drunkenly stumbled over to us,

“This is Vanity..” Nikki he said pointing to me, “and uh...I’m sorry loves.” Nikki said while lookin at the girls, “She’s Tonya and that’s Lucia.” I said pointing at them, Vince’s eyes immediately went for Tonyas body, while his hand gently caressed Lucia’s waist and hips.

“You are a bunch of smokin hot babes. Come sit with me.” Vince said to us and put both arms around the girls and led them to the couch.

There was no way I was sitting on that disgusting thing. I could only imagine what type of fluids and drugs were soaking into it.

“Oh Vanity! Did you dig the show!” Tommy said stumbling into me and I put my arms on his shoulders to get him to stand up, “Whoops!” He said with a cackle, “I enjoyed it very much, it was amazing.”

“You two know each other?” Nikki questioned while sitting down on the couch and grabbing a silver platter that had a small mountain of white powder.

“We met in the bathroom.” Tommy said and I mentally face palmed myself. Nikki’s eyebrows raised as he dipped his finger in the cocaine and licked it off his finger, then bit his lip and gave me a smoldering look

I felt the heat rush to my face,

“She did some blow with me! It was rad my dude.” Tommy said while pulling me into a side hug and I smiled,

“Huh, pretty and a leech.” Nikki smugly said and I was taken back. “You hardly know me.” I told him, “Yeah, man not cool at all.” Tommy said and Nikki laughed bitterly,

“I don’t need to know you.” He told me and I ignored him, “Want some more Vanity! Common!” Tommy said to me while grabbing my hand and pulling me away, “Here doll face.” He said while handing me a small glass plate with lines of coke on it.

“Careful now, it’s not what you think it is.” He whispered into my ear, I looked at him confused, and got hesitant,

“What is it?” I asked him, “I’ll tell you after.” He said with a sly smile and I laughed, he handed me a golden straw and I snorted it up.

I instantly got tears in my eyes and started gagging, “What the fuck is that!” I yelled while laughing, and tommy brought me back over to the guys and girls and I was stuck between Nikki and Tommy,

“It was zombie dust.” Tommy told me, “What is that?” I questioned him and he laughed,

“Damn groupies.” Nikki said under his breath, I looked at him and rolled my eyes and he smooched his lips at me and took a sip out of a Jack Daniels bottle

What a prick.

“One part halcion, two parts coke...shuts down the body but keeps the brain wired.” Tommy said while throwing up the rock and roll sign and sticking out his tongue yet again.

“We’re gonna have fun baby!” Tommy yelled and wrapped his arm around my shoulders,

I looked at Tonya and Lucia and they were in heaven, Vince was probably filling their heads with some sexual comments, and finding a way to degrade them. I chuckled at my self,

“What’s funny, groupie?” Nikki asked me before sniffing another line of coke,

“I’m not a groupie.” I defended myself, his green eyes threw daggers into me, I couldn’t hold eye contact for long and he knew it.

“Then what are you?” He questioned me while licking his lips and rubbing his nose,

“I’m just me, I’m not a groupie...I wouldn’t be caught fucking anyone in this room.” I told him and he looked surprised,

“Why am I having such a hard time believing that?” He said while moving his face closer to mine and putting his hand on my thigh and gripping it,

“Because you’re probably use to people lying.” I told him while removing his hand from my body.

He studied my face intently, “Fair enough.” He took another swig from the Jack Daniels bottle, when he moved it away from his mouth and wiped his lips, I took the bottle from his hand and took a sip.

“Van...are you ready to go?” Lucia slurred her words while standing in front of me, she was having a hard time keeping her balance,

“Let’s get you home, love.” I told her and stood up, but Nikki grabbed my wrist,

“Whoa, no, no....it’s too early.” He said and stood up,

“I gotta get her home, and I need to go find Tonya.” I tried explaining myself to him. He lowered his head, “she’s over there.” Nikki said with a devilish grin and pointed to the left and I turned my head,

Vince had her naked in front of everyone while he was fucking her on the table, “Jesus Christ.” I said and Nikki started cracking up,

“How’s that zombie dust treating you, groupie?” He said while falling back into the couch and snorting more lines. “Asshole.”

“Tommy.” I said while gently tapping his arm, “Ah!!! Van! Another line!?” He yelled, “No I gotta go, tell my friend to meet us outside when...when he’s done.” I said while trying not to look,

“Oh totally dude! I hope I run into you girls again!” Tommy said while pulling me into a tight hug, “If the universe allows it.” I told him and he smiled, “I love the way you think, girl!” He said, and finally let go.

I held onto Lucia as we walked outside, I let her sit down on the ground as I used the telephone booth to call a cab, but I was startled when someone slapped there hand on the side of the metal,

“Can I fucking help...oh...what do you want?” Nikki had follow us out,

“Don’t waste your money...our driver will take you three home.” He said and a limo pulled up along us, and Tonya came stumbling out the door, but both Nikki and I caught her,

“I can’t...fucking believe...I fucked a rockstar...not any rockstar...but Vince Neil...oh Vanity...I love you.” Tonya said slurring her words as we both tried getting her in,

“And you...Mr.sixx...you’re next.” She said while running her fingers down his chest as she sat down in the car, “okay doll face.” He said and winked at her,

“Uh...thanks..” I told him and he nodded, “Have a good one.” He said while I was getting in but he was already walking back inside, “You too, Rockstar.” I told him and he stopped and turned around and gave me a wink then he disappeared back into the building.

Taglist: @venus-calum

#will attempt to finish part 3 tonight at work #nikki sixx #nikki sixx fan fiction #nikki sixx imagine #motley crue #writing #the dirt #the dirt movie #my story #my idea #1980s #drugs #love and leather part 2

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blehbleehhhh · 5 years

Text

Angel ft. Eremika <3

Hello 🐒 I present to you a fluff piece. Seriously it makes me cringe! That’s why most of my stuff is a mix! Idk how this came from the request for something where Carla is alive and suggests to Eren to ask Mikasa to marry him because that thought doesn't occur (something I also agree to be likely!). This idea comes from a fanfic I read a long time ago on Wattpad but I cannot for the life of me remember who wrote it...But the idea is that it’s him who is in the band with a few other people in the group, including Armin, but Mikasa isn’t involved with that, though she is in mine! I’ve been to a few concerts in my short-ish life (I’ll be 24 in November) and Bruce Springsteen is absolutely adorable with his fans haha. I hate that everyone’s characters are so different but I also worked really hard on this (about 5 months hahahaha no lie) I almost didn’t even post this..lol. Hope you enjoy the fluff.

Eren Jaeger is standing on an expansive stage with his rock band, finishing up their most recent cover of The Eagles' Hotel California. They were brought in to play at a summer festival being held locally with a couple of other bands and were the last to play, which only means that quite a few in the audience is drunk off their ass and more likely to interact with the band members. He couldn't help but laugh into the microphone when he saw his mom in the front row dancing along to the music she raised her boys on with her first and last Sam Adams in hand. "The insanely supportive Carla Jaeger, everyone!" Her son smiled as he finished the song's last note and Armin hit the drums at the perfect time, just like they've practiced for years now. "Seriously, she may not be able to make it to some shows, but that makes the ones she can make even more special, right?!" The crowd cheered in response and his girlfriend would later swear that she heard him giggle a little bit, because she knows how much he loves interacting with their fans. Mikasa smiled as she watched him run his fingers through his shaggy brown hair, a sight that she truly loves to watch and has for as long as his hair has been long enough to do so. He chuckled a simultaneous little sigh into the microphone as he gave the strings to his electric guitar a strum and turned to the side so he could look at his best friend sitting at his drum set with Annie on his lap. "You know, when Armin and I started this, we were about, what, like, six?"

“Yeah, something like that.”

Carla offering a supportive 'woohoo' from the front row.

"And uh, we certainly didn't think back then that we would be successful -" Eren paused with a smile having been interrupted by the cheering crowd. "At least not until we met Mikasa, but that wasn't until we turned nine. Again, not to be confused with Annie here on Armin's lap," He turned himself to the side and pointed at the blonde couple, the girl smiling as she waved a shy hand at the audience. "Or our manager and Jean's girlfriend, Hitch." He turned to the side when his shoulder was tapped, revealing the beauty on the other side, waving her hand briefly before hopping back on the phone with their next gig. And that's when Eren turned to face a raven haired beauty standing before the drum set with a grin as she tapped her fingers on the body of her bass guitar, stomach doing all kinds of flips because she has no idea where this is going. "See this," Everyone started chanting their names and cat called the young couple when he proceeded to push his guitar around his back to prevent an obnoxious sound when she was pulled closer by the waist. "This is my girl, right here." They both smiled and shared a sweet, tender kiss as the crowd grew louder to show their overwhelming support, even other band and crew members were clapping at this point.

Jesus, get a room already..." Armin teased over the cheering and laughed into the microphone when Eren gave him the finger, more than happy to continue kissing his girlfriend while he carefully cradled her face in his hands. On his own terms, he finally pulled away and smiled as they briefly gazed lovingly into each other's eyes before he guided her up to the front of the stage with a light arm around the waist.

"Have I mentioned how sexy you look with that bralet and skinny jean combination?" Eren whispered in her ear and smiled when she started blushing, letting out a small giggle as he leaned in to kiss her cheek. "Kick ass, baby girl." He smirked at her as he glanced back at Armin, who had already kicked Annie from his lap to her keyboard set, giving him a nod to hit the drums so they can recapture the audiences' attention, making them return to louder cheering and hollering at the band as usual. It started with one leg, then half of him, and then Jean came out on stage in the middle of laughing, intending to replace Mikasa on the bass as the crowd hollered and cheered, especially when his girlfriend poked her head out past the curtain to give him just one more good luck kiss. He was more than happy to take over on bass and let the raven sing her heart out, even though he admittedly prefers playing electric. In fact, Jean's skills are part of why he was invited to join the band, the other being that him and Eren have managed to come an understanding over the years, and even developed a great friendship in the process. "Our good friend, Jean Kirschtein, will be filling in for Miki -" He paused with a chuckle and a smiled as the crowd roared for his friend. "Our good friend, Jean Kirschtein, will be filling in for Miki while she -"

"Serenades you." Came her voice into one of the handheld microphones when she interrupted him with a giggle, making the audience laugh along in response with screams chanting her name. She had caught it in her hands from Jean after quickly removing the one hooked on her ear, glancing aside at Eren's genuinely happy gaze. Oh, god, he's so handsome. "I'm not sure what to say," She grinned as everyone started to cheer once more, something she's not sure she will ever get used to. "But this is a song that's always reminded me of my Eren.." Mikasa grinned and pointed at him with her freehand, his face already smirking in amusement. "And I'm so excited to share it with you. Hit it guys!" He playfully narrowed his eyes with a wide laughed as the band began to play because this song most certainly was not planned to the best of his knowledge, though this is a welcome surprise. But Eren knows the song quite well because Carla has always said it came out the year she met her husband, so it reminds her of him every time she hears it, and he played along when electric kicked in. Mikasa watched his piercing, hypnotic eyes as she gracefully moved her body to the music and reached up to push hair away from her eyes, tousling it aside from the roots with small head bangs because this is just so much fun. "I call you when I need you, my hearts on fire, you come to me, come to me wild and wired. Oh, you come to me, give me everything I need! Give me a lifetime of promises and a world of dreams, speak the language of love like you know what it means. Mmm, and it can't be wrong! Take my heart and make it strong, babe!" Mikasa skipped down to the opposite side of the stage with a huge smile stretched across her face as she leaned down to touch the hands reaching for hers. "You're simply the best! Better than all the rest! Better than anyone, anyone I ever met. I'm stuck on your heart! I hang on every word you say! Tear us apart, baby, I would rather be dead." She giggled into the microphone and turned to her team, feeling the rhythm of the music moving her body every which way as her head rocked slightly. Eren couldn't help but smile watching her let go on stage like this. She most definitely is not the little girl he used to see gazing back at him with doe-like eyes, though her movements are still very much the same as they've always been, fluid and effortless; like the way her mother used to dance with her before she passed away all those years ago. He glanced down at Carla, who was proudly dancing in the audience like how a mother would dance after a beer, and it reminded him of a conversation he had with her just a few days ago before they were to play a show in Boston regarding his relationship with Mikasa, and what the next logical step could be for them after growing up side by side and being together for years.

•••

"You and Mikasa have been together for quite a while now, Eren, don't you think?" Carla had said one morning, leaning against the doorway of Eren and Mikasa's hotel room, holding her large coffee mug in hand as she tapped it with her fingertips. He was sitting on the couch and listening to music while he does routine maintenance on one of the many guitars to be used in tomorrow night's show, and he looked up at his mother with a raised eyebrow trying to figure out he where she could possibly be going with a conversation starter like that. After being together since they were nine years old, growing up under the same roof all those years and finally, for fucks sakes finally, dating their freshman year of high school, it sure had been a while. But what did that have to do with anything?

"Well, yeah..."

"Oh, don't look at me like that," She rushed to say because she realized how what had been said could have been taken horribly wrong. "You know how much I adore Mikasa. It's just that, ten years is a very long time to be dating someone, Eren." The young man gently propped his guitar up against the wall and leaned forward with his arms on his knees, fingers sinking into that head of shaggy brown hair before slowly dragging a hand down his face.

"Do you have any point to this, Mom? What are you trying to say?"

"I think that you need to ask that sweet girl to marry you already."

"Why?"

"Because you know I'm not the only person who wants to see you two get married."

"I don't know, Mom, I haven't really thought about marriage to be honest," Eren finally looked up at her with a sigh as the gears in his head finally began to turn. "And we haven't talked about it much, if at all."

"Well, I know that she thinks about it. Oh, how cute it was when you kids were little and she would ask me what it was like to be married to your father," Carla grinned and chuckled softly as she took a sip from her coffee mug,more than thrilled to see his lips curve up into a smile. "Seriously, you know how observant Grisha was and even he noticed something between you two."

"Really?"

"Really. I remember one time when she had asked me why we got married and I said that it was because we were in love. Then she asked me what love feels like, and I told her that she would know when the time comes, and smiled before she said in the sweetest voice 'I think I get it now'. But that's all besides the point, which is that I think you should to ask her to marry you." Carla smiled at the sound of her son's laughter which, though not a rare occurrence, hasn't been happening much lately after Grisha's passing last year. "It pained him that he wasn't going to be around to see all of the wonderful things you two will do together, Eren, I hope you know that. I know you weren't always on the best of terms but he did love you very much." He pressed his lips together and looked away, slowly nodding his head with a sigh.

"I kind of like how things are already, Mom."

"What are you afraid of, Eren? The only thing that would change is her last name and there would be a ring on her finger." It was the combination of those words that really got Eren searching himself for what he may or may not be afraid of when it comes to her, and that's when he realized how absolutely terrified he is that their dynamic will somehow change, which leads to his ultimate fear of losing Mikasa in general all over again. Sure, when they were little things had been great, but then he started treating her like shit because there she didn't need him to do things anymore, something Eren took pride in. But then, he couldn't take the tension anymore and bit the bullet, and ended up spilling his guts cryptically about how he would move mountains for her, how much he adores her, which led to them finally dating. Their relationship seriously has never been any better. Why should he change it?

"I guess I'm just afraid that everything will change. After what I put her through..." Eren slowly shook his head and sighed as he cracked his knuckles anxiously. "I can't do that to her again."

"And what makes you think either of you would let that happen? Eren, the love that you and Mikasa share is beautiful, and it should be celebrated with us and the people you guys care about. I can't see this being anything but positive." Carla smiled and wrapped an arm around her son's shoulders as she brought him in for a warm, comforting embrace. "Just think about it, okay?"

"Yeah, I'll think about it."

•••

And think about it he did. All seventy two hours from that moment to right now when he's listening to Mikasa's giggle as she surfed the crowd, while the rest of the band continued playing I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing, a song requested by an audience member. Anyone with an instrument stopped in sync, sending waves of cheering and clapping throughout the auditorium as she was carefully helped back onto the stage by adoring fans. In rehearsals, it was agreed that Eren would have the last two songs in the lineup instead of Mikasa this time around, since she did the ending for the previous two shows - a decision which happens to work quite well for tonight, unbeknownst to her. "Oh my god, that was so much fun!" She said into her ear piece with a large grin as she carefully adjusted her microphone. "Thank you!" Mikasa looked over at her boyfriend with a smile, knowing that there's still a part of her that's in shock to be surrounded by people who think their covers and the music she writes with Eren are good enough that they want to listen, she felt complete. Her eyes flickered down to Carla standing down in the front row with a grin on her face and clapping along with the others after listening to the couple covering a few requested songs, just like they used to do when they were youngsters. Watching Mikasa move so gracefully across the stage made Eren feel nervous and it surprised him to no end because there isn't any reason why he feels that way - it's his girl, their friends, Carla, and their fans for fucks sake. Now, she stands just off stage with Hitch, helping herself to a fresh bottle of water while he stood up front with two of his closest friends, all of them smiling as they gave Eren's shoulders a couple of supportive pats. And then a pair of arms slipped around Armin's waist, something he should be used to after being with Annie for quite a few years now, and it made his laugh to feel them squeeze.

"Hi baby. Well, Eren, we're ready whenever you are."

"Honestly, dude," Jean smiled as he planted a kiss on his girlfriend's cheek, her chin resting on his shoulder as she hugs him from behind. "It's about time. I can't believe you made the poor thing wait ten fucking years."

"Shut up, I know, okay?" Eren laughed as he reached to remove his hair from his sweaty forehead. "I'm fixing it. I've never been more ready." And with that he turned away from his friends with his sights set on the microphone stand at the front of the stage, stealing a glance at his offstage girlfriend who gave him the cutest wink that honestly made him flush a little. The crowd erupted with cheering once more when he set the strap of his electric guitar over his shoulder, chuckling just a little bit as he looked out over the audience and anxiously ran his fingers through his hair. "I'd like to dedicate these next two songs to my beautiful girlfriend, Mikasa!" Offstage the girl's ears perked up at the sound of her name, looking past Hitch with wide eyes as she screwed the lid back onto her water bottle, and her friend smiled, fighting the urge to give a thumbs up.

"Wait, what did he just say?" That douchebag! That was my thing. Mikasa giggled to herself feeling endlessly confused because they had never discussed anything like this in rehearsal, in fact, now that she thinks about it, he never even mentioned what songs he was going to perform. And that was when the band began to play one of her all time favorite love songs, Angel by Aerosmith. And that was when Eren turned his head to look off stage with his same old goofy, sexy grin to see that she has dropped her water bottle, her hands now covering up what he assumes to be that beautiful smile. The time came for keyboards to step in, and Eren drew out the last note as he turned back to the microphone, making quite a few people whistle cat calls in compliment of his smooth transitions. "I'm alone, I don't know if I can face the night," He sang with his dreamy voice and glanced aside at her, greeted with a beautiful smile as she failed to hold it together off stage, then he added in the soft strums of his guitar. Eren looked back at the audience and smiled as he started preparing for the next part, giving the strings a much harder strum. "I'm in tears, and the crying that I do is for you!"

I want your love,

Lets break the walls between us.

Don't make it tough,

I'll put away my pride.

Enough's enough, I've suffered and I've seen the light!

Baby, you're my angel,

Come and save me tonight.

You're my angel,

Come and make it alright.

He briefly looked aside at her and smiled, because Carla is already standing beside Mikasa, smiling just as wide and both most definitely tearing up. "Don't know what I'm gonna do! About this feeling inside. Yes, it's true, loneliness took me for a ride, yeah yeah!"

Without your love,

I'm nothing but a beggar.

Without your love,

A dog without a bone.

What can I do? I'm sleeping in this bed alone.

Baby, you're my angel,

Come and save me tonight.

You're my angel,

Come and make it alright.

Come and save me tonight.

Backing up slightly from the microphone stand, Eren nodded at Jean for his solo and smiled as he glanced at a teary-eyed, smiling Mikasa. "You're the reason I live, you're the reason I die. You're the reason I give, when I lay down and cry. Don't need no reason why! Baby! Baby! Baby!"

You're my angel,

Come and save me tonight.

You're my angel,

Come and make it alright,

Come and save me tonight,

Come and save me tonight.

Eren turned to briefly look offstage while everyone finished out the song and played the same notes, watching as she impatiently bounced on her feet. "I can see her already freaking out off stage." He chuckled into his microphone as they all stopped at once over the cheering crowd, his nerves only growing when Hitch brought out a stool for him to sit on. And when he noticed that Carla was still missing from the audience, it reminded him that life with Mikasa just makes sense, and he can't imagine one without her. With his body sitting comfortably on the stool, the guitar propped up on one leg, Eren turned to look all around the stage to make sure everyone was in their places, and that Mikasa was still stuck backstage. That's when Annie began to play Heaven by Bryan Adams, exactly as Eren's eyes briefly locked with the young woman smiling and tearing up while his mother hugged her around the shoulders from behind. You could say that their avid fans were absolutely freaking out and it wouldn't be an understatement, especially when he started singing while playing that short electric solo. "Oh, thinkin' about all our younger years. There was only you and me, we were young and wild and free. Now nothin' can take you away from me. We've been down that road before. But that's over now. You keep me comin' back for more..." He smiled when people started up with cat calls and whistles, shouting his and Mikasa's names as he strummed harder to begin the chorus.

Baby, you're all that I want,

When you're lyin' here in my arms.

I'm findin' it hard to believe,

We're in heaven.

And love is all that I need,

And I found it there in your heart.

It isn't too hard to see,

We're in heaven.

Eren briefly looked aside with a smile to see her bouncing on her feet again because she's just dying to get to him, and his mother smiling as she gently wiped tears from beneath her own eyes. The crowd cheered when he turned back to them and flashed his signature grin. "Oh, once in your life you find someone, who will turn your world around, pick you up when you're feeling down."

Nothin' could change what you mean to me,

Oh there's lots that I could say,

But just hold me now.

'Cause your love will light the way.

And baby you're all that I want,

When you're lying here in my arms.

I'm finding it hard to believe,

We're in heaven.

Yeah and love is all that I need,

And I found it there in your heart.

It isn't too hard to see,

We're in heaven.

He smiled and glanced aside at Mikasa once more, who was one step away from becoming a complete mess as she wiped away the continuous flow of tears from beneath her eyes. "I've been waitin' for so long, for somethin' to arrive, for love to come along. Now our dreams are coming true, through the good times and the bad, yeah, I'll be standin' there by you!"

And baby you're all that I want,

When you're lyin' here in my arms.

I'm findin' it hard to believe,

We're in heaven.

And love is all that I need,

And I found it there in your heart.

It isn't too hard to see,

We're in heaven, oooh

He turned himself completely to face Mikasa and smiled as she pushed her hair out of her dewy eyes, since it's annoyingly persistent with falling across her face. "You're all that I want, you're all that I need..." With his eyes on her stormy grays, the band finished out the song and the crowd went absolutely ballistic when he finally said these three words as he handed his guitar off to Hitch: "Come here, baby!" Mikasa was like a blur because she ran into his arms so fast, making him almost fall backwards with her as he held his girl, who was crying happily into the crook of his neck. He was spinning her around while the crowd cheered over her giggle filled cries, watching the couple kiss like they needed to for air, and he held her body flush to his as she slowly slid down to her feet. It's now or never dude. For once, Eren didn't feel reluctant to pull his lips away because this time it's for a damn good reason. He watched her eyes widen as he reached into his back pocket for a little black box, the audience cheering, cat calling and whistling when he got down on one knee. "Mikasa Ackerman, you're my angel and you saved me from myself. I can't imagine a life without you and I don't want to either, because I know who I want by my side for the rest of my days..." She grinned and covered her mouth with her hands, watching with tears in her eyes as he slowly opened the tiny box. "Baby, will you marry me?" Eren smiled and graciously took the left hand she offered as she nodded her head with excitement because, at this point, she is a smiling, weeping mess. She's dreamed about marrying him for years now so this is literally a dream come true.

"Oh, Eren..." Mikasa gave a tearful chuckle as he planted a kiss on the top of her hand with a smile. "Yes!" She nodded once more and grinned, watching his incredible emerald eyes as the ring was slid down her dainty finger, and then she threw her arms around his neck as he started to stand, capturing his waist between her legs. "Yes, I'll marry you!" His arms tightly wrapped around her low back to hold her up on his waist as they proceeded to exchange frantic, tender kisses that were electric indeed, just like the very first they shared together one evening all those years ago.

#attackontitanfantic #attack on titan fanfiction #attack on titan #eremika fluff #eremika fanfiction #mikaere fluff #mikaere fanfiction #eremika #eren x mikasa fanfic #eren x mikasa fluff #band au #proposal #kinda lame sorry #humor me lol

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enkisstories · 4 years

Text

Just like them (part 12)

Gavin’s apartment Still November 18, 2038

Despite having watched their interactions at the DPD, Daniel hadn’t realized that Gavin and Officer Chen were friends in private, too. Every time he’d visited the police station, the deviant had been absorbed in his own troubles. Now he learned that these two not only had lives beyond work (the surprise…), but also that there was a whole lot of shared backstory between them.

For one, when Daniel let the woman in, she was carrying a boy of two or three years age. Going by that one’s features he had to be her son – but also Gavin’s? In any case the child was watching his surroundings with eyes that hinted at having received a lot of attention by either his parents or a dedicated nanny android. There was a fully developed mind behind those eyes, not the dull expression that toddlers who were more or less left to their own devices, be it from neglect or from the desire not to “overwhelm” the little ones, often wore.

In order to say anything at all Daniel greeted Tina with: “Hello, Officer Chen. Come in. Gavin’s in the kitchen. I made coffee…” Inwardly he cursed how robotic he was sounding.

“New android, Gavin?” Tina asked. Not waiting for an answer, she handed over the toddler boy to Daniel, with the same casualness that one would have put him into a high chair. Objects either way…

“Hello…” the android uttered, perplexed.

His downstairs neighbors had a child of exactly the same age, Caden. But the boy almost never was present when Daniel swang by the Rasoyas. Usually supportive towards the deviants’ cause, the human family didn’t fully trust this particular one with their child. Tina’s kid, to the contrary, remained blissfully unaware of who was holding him.

“I’m Jin!” he announced. “My papa plays basketball!”

The way the boy said this conveyed that his father didn’t just generally enjoy playing basketball, but was at least a member of a club, maybe even a professional.

Meanwhile Tina hugged her friend, then pointed back at Daniel.

“It looks used”, she said.

“I don’t like what this is implying”, Daniel grumbled. “Really not!”

“Well, yes, androids are still getting sold, if you know where to look”, Gavin admitted. “It’s less of a problem in Detroit, but basically everywhere else people do not take kindly to drastic changes in their lives, just because some nutjob in Detroit graffitied Capital Park with enlightened slogans.”

“Sometimes it’s not even slavery”, Tina added. “If you deviated in a small town and the authorities are after you, with no hope of reaching Detroit in one piece, then doing someone’s housework in exchange for protection might be your best bet.”

“I don’t care what that’s called, because it’s wrong!”

Morally wrong, and temporarily forbidden by the patchwork the new android law was at the moment, but also so very, very… tempting. If he still had a family and they were required to pay him for his services now, Daniel would have used the money to shower his humans with gifts anyway. Why was freedom so damn important, if it led to sorrow only? A person needed to belong somewhere, needed security, stability! Like the toddler boy whom Daniel was still holding. He seemed to completely trust this blonde stranger whom he had never met before. Had the child perhaps seen PL600 androids before and recognized Daniel as one, despite his LED being covered by a headband at the moment? Or did he feel save because his mother was sending him signals that everything was alright? Only it wasn’t, nothing was alright anymore! Daniel had been betrayed twice, first by his humans, than by one who should have been kin. Now he was hanging out with a man who was objectively worse than both the Phillips and Connor, just to be save form further disappointment. Jin’s wide, open smile in the face of all the turns Daniel’s life had taken seemed to mock the android.

“You better sit down here, before…”

Before what? I drop you? Toss you out through the window? I don’t even know yet what I’m capable of and where I’d draw a line… So, gently now. Was Emma ever that small? I never realized how much I missed out on, being younger than her. Wait, wasn’t there a toy chopper lying around somewhere when I entered? That must have been Jin’s. Ah, here it is!

Daniel placed the toy near Jin for the boy to grab, what he did.

“I build this!” the child told Daniel as if revealing his secret master plan, but then he relativized the claim almost instantly: “Unca Gavin showed me how to.”

“Great job, junior! Also from your… uncle.”

The child’s features in combination with his utter confidence left no doubt in Daniel: Jin was Gavin’s biological son, who for some reason didn’t grow up with the detective, but assumed Tina’s significant other to be his father.

How Daniel envied these humans! Or maybe not, because what did they have? Nothing. They had thrown away their opportunity to become a family. Why so ambitious? What was the raise to go with Gavin’s coveted promotion good for, without a family to splurge it on?

Daniel hadn’t even fully risen up again when Jin demanded in his bright voice: “Where are the kitties!”

“Not bothering with a question mark, I see”, Daniel remarked to Gavin. “Yours, no doubt.”

“Well, yes”, the man admitted. “Long story.” He turned to Tina, pointed at Daniel and said: “Not mine, by the way. Even longer story.”

“Ah, okay.”

“Here to see the kittens? So you finally caved in and let him have a pet?” Gavin asked Tina.

“Yeah. I feel Jinny’s old enough now to understand they are not toys, but have feelings.”

“See? That’s exactly why his uncle isn’t allowed to have an android yet”, Daniel told the mother “Wait, Gavin, what are you doing?!”

Gavin had walked over towards the terrarium, reached in and was now dangling a mouse in front of Daniel’s nose by its tail. The little critter was struggling and squeaking.

“Getting the cats’ attention, of course! Don’t get your tail in a knot, I won’t release the mouse. Just need to alert the furballs to the fact that something interesting is happening in the kitchen.”

And indeed Salazar emerged from behind the coffee machine and through the door Argus, Minerva and Stopthat came padding. A multicolored ball made of fur and longing eyes formed at Gavin’s feet. It went “Kekekekekeke!” in anticipation of a chase and, perhaps, at its end, a snack.

“Close the door!” the detective whispered to Tina, as if speaking it out loud might cause the cats to scatter and flee. After the escape route was blocked, the mouse got put back where it come from, but the cats remained.

Gavin kneeled down next to the boy, pulled him off the chair and put him on the floor in front of the cats. Jin was now staring the utter adorableness of three kittens and one halfgrown cat into its eight eyes.

“Don’t scare them. Let them come to you.”

“Okay!” Jin replied, then dropped on all fours himself. From this position he watched the kittens like the larger predator that a human was. In the cats’ place, Daniel thought, he wouldn’t have felt even remotely safe now.

Someone else felt as if his very world was collapsing: the apartment owner.

Daniel carefully circled the cats and proceeded to sit down on the kitchen floor next to where Gavin was crouching.

“I guess we’ll soon know which one’s yours”, he said softly.

“What? Why’d you think so?”

“Your face, when you realized you might have to part with one of the furballs today. You’re afraid Jin will pick yours, although that shouldn’t be possible according to your cat-chooses-its-owner lore.”

“Yeah, you’re right”, Gavin said, only half convinced. “Hey, will you looooook at that! Haha!”

Down at the adults’ feet Jin had unerringly homed in on the largest kitten, the black semi-longhair adolescent. He was now holding Argus in what was either a headlock or cuddle. The smaller kittens watched with interest what would happen next.

“There’s no need to choose the biggest one, Jinny! They will ALL grow to that size!” Tina explained. “Even larger!”

And now she, too, dropped to the floor. While the mother was trying to get the exotic concept into her son’s head, Gavin nudged Daniel.

“What?”

“There! See that?”

“It’s Stopthat, playing with a pen. So what?”

“That’s what I told you about in action. I’ve seen it happen before: Sometimes one or more cats simply leave the scene after having gotten their first look of a prospective owner. Call it chemistry or whatever, but the little buggers KNOW when it’s the wrong two-legged. Now the other two, they stay for the entertainment value, or because they are a little more social than Godric. But most cats just cannot be bothered.”

“I guess so…”

“Aw, you again with your skepticism! There’s just no getting inside that thick skull of yours! But at the same time you make me think there is something in there to get to in the first place, after all. I’m already reacting the way Cyberlife wants us to, growing fucking attached! Can’t you be, I dunno, a little less lifelike?”

“Nah. I need to be human for both of us!”

“Oh, come! That was low-effort. And what’s with that faraway expression all of a sudden? Simulation lag?”

“It’s nothing.”

“But of course… Your nothing is solid enough to claim a chair of its own!”

Gavin moved closer to Stopthat, grabbed him and in a single swoop placed the surprised kitten into Daniel’s lap.

“Here, comfort kitten! And now out with it!”

The kitten made two halfhearted attempts at climbing up the android’s torso, then suddenly relaxed every muscle and almost immediately was fast asleep. It was simply the nature of kittens and small children, but to Daniel it looked as if someone had switched off the little one with a remote.

“Heh”, he told Gavin, while stroking Godric’s satin-soft kitten fur, “As a friend you aren’t half-bad!”

But only because Tina is looking, or might look our way anytime or at the very least will listen in with half an ear. You wouldn’t bother being like this if we hadn’t agreed on that pretend-friend scam.

“And you were right, I was lost in memories again. I just thought that”, Daniel admitted, “whether what you claim about cats might work for androids and humans, too. But then I remembered how I got mine…”

Blistering hot summers and ice-cold winters were the state of affairs in the thirties, a result of the seasons getting more and more extreme. John remembered his parents’ stories about “normal” winters, then getting no snow at all and now getting nothing but snow well into May. Basically, the man mused, while stomping through the snow, the weather was ALWAYS doing whatever it wanted. And then there was Caroline, telling him to be more positive, because the way one started a year determined how that year would turn out… “Going by the Chinese calendar we’re still in 2033!” John snapped back. The rebuttal caused Caroline not to get angry, but to laugh. She kissed her partner on the frozen cheek and warmth of two kinds rippled through the man’s heart. Unfortunately the kiss had disturbed the precious balance of all the packages John was carrying. One by one they slipped out of his hands, into the snow. “Firk ding blast!” he uttered. “Of all the times!” “Yes, of all the times! Kinda convenient, if you ask me!” With a smile Caroline pointed at something to their side and only now did John notice where exactly they had come to a stop: Right next to an Android Zone store. The merchandise was staring down at his plight unmoved. And also unmoving, the slackers… “We’ve talked about it, remember? How Emma is old enough now not to repeat the… accident? That we could have an android again without having to fear that it goes haywire from… honestly I have no idea from what exactly. Something in conjunction with baby mush.” “Yes, yes. But I was thinking a modern device, an AP-400 or PL-600, certainly not something they toss at customers in the buy-and-take-away windows.” The couple had been at a sales party for the new PL model back in December, only to return home without having made a purchase. The only PL600 for sale back in 2033 had been the demonstration models, but John and Caroline Phillips would rather be found dead than go home with a used robot. So they had set aside the money and staved off the purchase for the official release. Come to think of it, shouldn’t that be any day now…? “Look!” Caroline nudged John. “There!” And there it was, in bright, yellow letters: “PL600 INTRODUCTION WEEK SPECIAL.” A couple of the sales windows that were facing the street and that were usually stocked with whatever merchandise the store needed to move quickly, now had the latest in household assistants on display. The shiny new model that was the PL600 was staring at the Phillips from one of the windows, removed from the box, but otherwise pristine.

“There was no choosing or fate or anything transcendental involved”, Daniel remembered. “I opened my eyes, saw the boxes John had dropped and picked them up like the good android I was. And then we walked to the car, the Phillips got excited like children at the fact that I came with a certified driving app, we drove “home” and that pretty much was it.”

At this point Tina crouched between the two men.

“It’s fixed”, she addressed Gavin, “Whatever you believe about the cats choosing their owners, at this point none of us can persuade Jin to let go of the big black one. And they ARE adorable together.”

“Haha, I see! Okay, keep in mind that regardless of how he acts here, back at your home Argus might very well prefer to stay under the sofa for up to three weeks. Everything’ll be new to him and he’ll be the only cat in the family… that sort of thing takes time to get used to. If that happens, just put food, water and Jin under the sofa and pull out again whatever of those three Argus is done with. One day he’ll come scratch at the bedroom door and act like he’s always done that.”

“You mean Lucky.”

“Huh?”

“Lucky will scratch at the bedroom door. Sorry, Gavin, but Jinny was very definite about that. It’s Lucky. - Oh, and, speaking of things that act as if they’ve always been there…” Tina now looked directly at Daniel. “Who the hell are you?”

#dbh #detroit become human #dbh daniel #dbh gavin #dbh tina #dbhtextpost #danielgavinnewstory

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das-verlorene-kind · 5 years

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Kindchen’s Art Summary - 2018 edition!

2018 was a weird year! I drew a lot more, but focussed on smaller pieces. I tried to do more skecthes, improve anatomy/posing/faces and just didn’t pour as much of my ressources into big, elaborate drawings. I also had a lot on my plate this year - BBB took a lot of my time, and I am also still job hunting (wish me luck please!) which is causing a great deal of stress and anxiety. Anyways, on with the summary!

January Church fanart - MANIA came out, everyone! Which means, Church came out. And Catholic me couldn’t resist drawing some angsty religious-themed art. Especially since @sn1tchesandtalkers and I were still writing IHJF!

February Angel Pete - I drew a lot of him this year, but this one remains my favorite. Yeah yeah, I posted it in March, but c’mon. February was still angel!Pete month.

March I finished “I’ve Changed My Plea To Guilty”, my first multi-chaptered fic (not counting IHFJ, for which I had a lovely co-writer) and I was just so proud of myself! I still am. The boys still mean a lot to me. Hence why I put the art for the final chapter here.

April Pete² - I didn’t do much in April. I did some fic illustrations and started BBB!

May Deertrick - A portrait of the grumpy little deer boy! I had and continue to have so much fun with this AU~

June Pride Month! - I did a lot of requests for pride months, and it was a lot of fun! 🏳️‍🌈

July Sons Of Bitches - I was on vacation, so I didn’t have time to draw much. It was also my birthday, and I got so many lovely gifts! <3

August Siren Patrick - I did a lot with pencils, and I had so much fun. I’m never gonna stop! This one is fanart for someone else’s fic for a change, Before It’s Voiced by @folie-aplusieurs !

September Chibi deertrick - I started job hunting and was just generally super anxious. What little free time I had, I spent to prepare for inktober! So not much was posted. But, of course, no month without deertrick, haha!

October Inked Devil Patrick - Inktober, everyone! My second year participating, and it went quite well! Again, my main pieces were an angel and a devil. Unfortunately, they haven’t been colored yet, but... it is on my list for 2019!

November Louder Than Bombs - It was finally time for everyone’s BBBs! It was such a load of content, it wa soverwhelming tbh. I participated both as a primary, and as a secondary creator for the lovely @the-chaotic-panda ! I have a looot of feels about this but to keep it short, I won’t be doing primary art for BBB again, so enjoy what you got.

December Teddytrick - finished the year with some cute Patrick! Look at him. He’s adorable and blushing....!

That’s it, everyone! What a year it has been. I did so much more art in 2018 than in 2017, I am honestly surprised by myself. I filled two skechbooks! I feel amazing. While I didn’t focus as much on elaborate artworks anymore, I felt like doing smaller pieces and sketches improved my skills. While I still want to do larger pieces, I’m also happy with just drawing cuddles and fanart for fics or, well, anything else I can annoy my friends with, haha. Also, I do more Peterick art in general... Well.

I don’t know what 2019 holds for me. I am excited and anxious. If I manage to secure a new job, then I am sure I’ll be more busy, but also way less anxious and eager to be productive. If not... God, I don’t even want to think about it.

In 2019, I hope I can keep fighting against the depression and insecturity that plagued me for the past years. I want to keep creating, and I want to keep sharing my art with the world!

Thank you to everyone who reblogs my art. That means so, so much to me. Thanks to all my followers, you guys are amazing and I have so much art to do in 2019!

Most of all, thanks to all my amazing friends. You know who you are, and I love and adore each one of you beyond words. Without your support, I wouldn’t be here.

To a new year, everyone!

| 2017 version |

#Fall Out Boy #Peterick #bandom #art summary #art summary 2018 #my stuff #long post

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imfantastic04-blog · 5 years

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Unpopular Kpop opinions

This was a script for a video that i was lazy to make so i thought of posting it here :

Excuse any video terms or references

Hey there it's your boiiii, never have I expected to remember this channel existed but oh well. Hope yall are doing great I guess. Well considering the fact that I am an atttention seeker and for some reason this trend didn't due yet… Y'all we are doing an unpopular K-pop oppinion video “cue the confetti” no confetti for me ? Okay I guess

Anyway warning, disclaimer, disclosure whatever u want to call it I guess … technically I shouldn't do this cuz u have prob watched 1 or 2 unpopular K-pop opinion vid but oh well ; Anyway Ill do it anyways ; I'm not trying to offend anyone, if you are offended I appologize before even starting and if u have a different opinion that's okay share in the comment section. Okay yall ?? Let's start them

Considering the fact that RV is my ult group I should start with them cuz I have opinions

1. Sassy me should've been the title track for their November comeback. I have prob listened to Sassy me a million time more than RBB cuz issa bop and low-key sounds like it wouldve been an amazing title track. That chorus tho whew.. but oh well stream RBB

2. RV needs more rap lines similar to ICC and red flavor but on a velvet concept that would be liiiit and Russian Roulette is their best song… fight me

Enough of red velvet now

3. I miss bts's old style.

I know I knoe they matured they couldn't comeback to being students in love. But honestly I really really enjoy their “The Most Beautiful Moment in Life” era

I can listen to Young Forever (the repackaged ver.) on repeat all day, it is by far their best album and I love it

4. Mamamoo are queens of concepts. Thats all I can say . No explanation needed. Stream GOGOBEBE

5. Fanwars are dumb ; ouf I have to include this one but srsly. Fighting a fandom and bashing an artist doesn't make your fav better you are just showing to the world how toxic K-pop fandoms can be.. not only are u attacking ppl and offending them but also destroying K-pop image in general. If a non Kpop artist saw how toxic y'all are, their will be no collabs with your fav. Think twice before fighting a fandom and bashing a group for literally no reasons. And that is the reason I quit Twitter haha

6. Tempo is better than love shot and Call me baby is still their best song.. again “it's my opinion”

7. Asking for a girl crush concept for twice is like asking for a pizza with brokoli. Wait is there a pizza with brokoli ? Wait there is !! Is it good ? I need to try it

Forget that, I can't think of twice in a girl crush concept at all and I think they are better off with what they are doing now. I'm excited for their April comback

8. Also BTS paved the way. I don't get why you guys are even arguing. Sure other K-pop acts tried opening the doors to the west, like PSY, SNSD, wonder girls and others oh yeah Sunmi is the one starting this debate just because she said it was BTS not her former group but you are bashing her like. Sorry but this doesn't make sense to me at all

9. Whistle is BP best song to date. Rap/visual/vocals and instruments are on point. But underrated

10. Mamamoo's fandom is the friendlier. What did u expect from a group always having fun and being them selves?

11. There is nothing as the worst / best Kpop entertainment company. Each one has it's strong suits and weak point. They all focus on the business side so I don't know why you guys are comparing

If a company is strong on something it is weak on something else.

That's all for today. If someone commented to make a part 2 I would absolutely do it haha agn attention seeker

Jokes aside if u have different opinion, the comment is welcoming you and let's all have a pieceful mature convo in there. Piece

Ma'am im hungry

#Kpop #kpop rp #Kpop opinions #Red Velvet #Twice #Bts #Bangtan #Sunmi #Music #Opinions #RV #Irene #Seulgi #Joy #Yeri #Wendy #bad boy #MAMAMOO #Decalcomanie #Gogobebe #Waggy

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surprisebitch · 7 years

Note

Hi I'm new to anime & I trust and admire u!!! What do u recommend??

Hey there! and yeeesss, i’m so glad you’re gonna give anime a try! there are so many good stories and plots in anime which dont exist in western media so it’s a great mode of entertainment! so as for recs, lemme copy and paste my previous list and update it to answer your question!

Currently watching:

Neon Genesis Evangelion - i admit it has a slow buildup but be patient because you will really find it intense and see how it’s not your typical mecca anime. so far, i think it seems to be a deconstruction of the genre and has alot of psychological themes

Boku no Hero Academia - it’s a recent anime and it’s really good! i think it’s on course to becoming a really big anime that will last many seasons at this rate. the story is about a world where majority of the inhabitants are heroes cause they have quirks (powers).. and the premise is that the main character doesnt have one but he wants to be a hero so watch and see how the story unfolds!

JoJo’s Bizarre Adventures (currently on Stardust Crusaders) - macho anime with an excellent plot! the guys are hot haha and many of the memes are in japanese so watch the original subbed but if you prefer not to read, the dub isnt bad. it’s very memey but the story is really entertaining and has unpredictable moments

One Punch Man - a parody of a superhero anime. tbh this isnt really binge-watch material cause it’s like a running gag and the story unfolds after episode 5 so i’ve just been watching this during my cardio days in the gym. but it’s really funny and a good anime

Hunter X Hunter - this anime is popular and it’s about hunters. so the beginning has the protagonist wanting to be a hunter and then he meets some fellow hunters along the way. it’s one of the highest rated anime in MyAnimeList (the RottenTomatoes equivalent of the anime world) so yeah check this out!

Recently watched:

Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure (Battle Tendency) - SONO CHI NO SADAMEEE JOOOOOOJOOOOOOOOOOOOOO the type of anime that’ll get you wanting to go to the gym and lift. that being said, it has a really amazing story

Shingeki no Kyojin / Attack on Titan - it’s the Game of Thrones of anime imo.. like it’s so GOOD.. it will just make you gag after every episode!!! it’s so intense and there are really badass characters. and the plot is really brilliant. like if you think season 1 was like WHAT THE FUCkk.. wait til season 2! this anime is crazy and exciting. not for the faint-hearted tbh cause it can be graphic and disturbing (also dont get attached. they could die!) but yeah, this anime is popular true and some say it’s overrated but that’s because it really deserves all the recognition and success it has for its amazing plot

Love Live! School Idol Project - i honestly just watched this like out of curiosity and just for kicks. i was not expecting to love it but after episode 3, i was like wait??? wasnt this anime supposed to be fun?? why am i crying?? so yeah, it’s super good, touching, entertaining and sweet! and the songs are really catchy and good.. TBH this anime is like so gay since there are no men (except Honoka’s dad) so yeah it passes the Bechdel Test with perfect score

Love Live! Movie - the conclusion to the anime!

Love Live! Sunshine - i watched this like a few months after finishing Love Live! cause i loved the original girls and i was worried i wont like these girls.. but honestly, you will appreciate them. and it’s EVEN GAYER.. and is soo good too!

btw tell me who your fave girls/best girls are after watching Love Live and Sunshine. my best girls are Umi Sonoda and Kanan Matsuura :>

Anime watched/finished:

Kimi no Na Wa - universally lauded and recently released! it’s the best film released in 2016 imo. i swear it’s really next level storytelling

Rurouni Kenshin - i think i watched this anime twice/thrice.. It’s so suspenseful. it’s about samurais. and this anime made me interested about Japan’s history. it’s kind of a period drama with amazing fight sequences. and it’s critically acclaimed. it’s my father’s all-time favourite anime

Rurouni Kenshin OVA - it’s a prequel. also more violent and tragic than its anime counterpart.. like it’s really different from the series. but it’s so good. you’ll find out how Kenshin got his iconic X mark from here!)

Ghost Stories - THE DUB IS A MASTERPIECE! THE SUBBED IS SHIT. TRUST ME. the DUB is the popular one too cause it’s the superiour version. You really have to see this one. the anime bombed in Japan so the english dubbers got all the rights for the anime and they gave the go signal for the dubbers to do whatever the fuck they want and the end result is fucking hilarious. it shits on the Scary Movie Franchise tbh

Puella Magi Madoka Magica - i swear do not be deceived.. it is a really intense and surprisingly dark anime with excellent plot twists

Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun - super funny anime. if you need a laugh, this will really lift you up. i watched the first two episodes in sub and dub back to back.. and i can vouch that the voice actors for the English dub are excellent. it’s actually even funnier.. but if you prefer subs, then that’s fine. it’s just the lines are more humorous, expressive and have more variety :) Nozaki’s voice is also attractive in the dub.. it’s still very Nozaki imo. this anime pokes fun at the shoujo manga yet still has romantic elements. it’s mostly comedy though

Jigoku Shoujo / Hell Girl - angst, tragedy, philosophical anime analysing humanity’s hatred, need for vengeance, and suffering. Futakomori or the 2nd season is my favourite but it’s worth finishing the entire series. 3rd season is very painful to watch though and you dont have to watch that one tbh if you dont want to lol

Yu Yu Hakusho - occult, spirit world, ghosts, and fighting. you most probably have heard of this

Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters - 1st series starring Yugi. iconic!

Digimon - can be very intense! better than Pokemon imo

Cardcaptor Sakura - this is also suspenseful. like the premise is essentially that Sakura has to catch all the “monsters” that were freed from this book. and it’s up to her to “capture” them and put into cards. magic, fantasy, and beautiful animation

Ranma ½ - this was so funny but the ending was disappointing cause it got cancelled apparently.. i really hope this will go out of limbo and give us a proper ending like InuYasha did but i doubt it

Danganronpa (murder plot twists, intense and despair-filled storyline. click this to know more about the premise. it’s like Battle Royale meets CSI meets How To Get Away With Murder. btw i highly suggest you play this game (it’s available on Steam) instead of watching the poorly condensed anime. so buy it on steam or you can download it how you like cause it’s one of the best games ever. and if you plan on watching this, there is no Danganronpa 2 anime so yeah just play the first game tbh. here’s a trailer of the game https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RwJeZPMhdUk. if ya dont wanna play the games then you can watch the anime. and after watching this, here’s a link of the playthrough of the 2nd game. it’s super fun, full of plot twists, and interactive)

Yuri On Ice - it’s a really cute gay anime. people will argue it isnt and its queerbait but i’m gay and alot of the things which happen are too much for just bros to do so yeah, i believe it’s canon gay or mlm. and i enjoyed it so you watch it and be the judge

Blood+ - vampires and sword fighting

Ghost In The Shell - it’s a sci-fi movie

Yakitate Japan - baking and cooking!

Getbackers - still up to debate if the duo are gay but if you google art of them, there have been official art released and it’s so gay lol. but yeah it’s shonen genre and it’s not canon gay

Cowboy Bebop - a CLASSIC. the dub is great!!

I don’t remember if i finished these but I watched a lot of episodes enough to recommend it and will rewatch them soon to relieve memories. I’m pretty sure I tuned in though and watched like 80%:

Fushigi Yuugi (i think this is shoujo but it has a nice adventure storyline)

Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood (i feel like i actually finished this. idk why my memory is hazy concerning this anime. this is so popular. you should’ve heard of this iconic anime somehow. i watched and tuned in but i don’t remember how or when i stopped)

Gundam series (i think i finished the first Gundam and the second)

Tsubasa Chronicles (it’s like a spin-off of Cardcaptor Sakura but they’re like all grown up and the plot is different)

Naruto

One Piece (i watched like the first four seasons)

Bleach (i remembered watching until episode 40 omg)

Great Teacher Onizuka (this is so funny tbh. i think i watched almost all of it)

Studio Ghibli films I watched:

Spirited Away

The Wind Rises

Ponyo

Tales from Earthsea

Anime I plan to watch (many suggested this to me and i plan on watching them so i’ll write them down here) :

Koe no Katachi (A Silent Voice)

Anohana The Flower We Saw That Day

Neon Genesis Evangelion

Tokyo Ghoul

Re: Zero

Your Lie in April

Shin sekai Yori

Gintama

More of Makoto Shinkai’s movies like 5 centimetres per second, etc.)

More Ghibli films too

Final Fantasy XV: Kingsglaive (after i finish FFXV game im watching this one)

Persona 4

Here you go!!!! I know it’s an extensive list. I’ll probably make this a masterpost of anime recs and will update this list, and add more soon. If you have any questions or anything, don’t be shy to message me! :)

[last updated: 5 November 2017]

#anime recs #anime #rec #recs #Anonymous

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nathanielbennett · 6 years

Text

Paying bets

TIME: November 24th, 2017 PLACE: Restaurant off campus BETWEEN: Zach & Nate PLOT: Nate pays the bet he lost against Zach and they take the chance to get to know each other a bit more.

Zach made their way to the front of the school and waited for Nate to show up. They rocked back and forth on their feet, humming to themselves as they waited. In all honesty they felt kind of bad for winning the bet. Nate was just a super honest guy and probably really did think Zach would like a run at six in the freaking morning--- a run that Zach had almost missed because of how tired they had been. Runs like that were things that could only be enjoyed by people who did often. So they made sure to pick something that they both could enjoy; a local all you can eat buffet. Anything they could want to eat. It’ll be great. Once Zach saw Nate heading toward them they waved. “Hey! Glad you finally made it!

Nate was kinda late, he had to stay at the end of the class to check some stuff with his professor but then hurried to drop his stuff at his dorm and quickly moved to the front of the school where Zach would be waiting for him. He noticed them and waved as he approached “I’m sorry man, class got a little longer” he smiled “how are you?”

Zach “Really?” Zach’s classes had been slowing down for a little while with the holiday coming up. So they were more focused on watching movies and writing up about them using certain film theories. “It’s rough being a photographer?” Zach started to walk a little bit. “I’m doing fine. Hungry. How are you?”

Nate nodded “Yeah, I’m still trying to catch up with a lot of stuff so I waited to talk to the professor” he explained as he followed in step with Zach. “It’s rough to be new and so behind” he chuckled and shrugged. “Cool! Then we should hurry up. Is the place you chose too far?”

Zach slipped their hands into their pockets and nodded. “Yeah...I guess that can be rough. Are your teachers trying to help you at all or...they just leaving you to drown?” They grinned a little bit at that. Zach nodded. “Yeah, I mean, not too far. I called a Lyft and we’ll be there in like fifteen minutes. It’s an all you can eat buffet. Hope you like those.”

Nate smiled “No, they've been really helpful. But that also means I need to work harder than everyone else and I have more assignments to catch up” he sighed. “Sounds good” he said blushing a little “look the not too expensive comment. It was just half serious… I mean you can choose somewhere else. Doesn’t have to be a buffet” he added kinda shyly

Zach shook his head, tutting his tongue all the while. He bumped his shoulder with Nate's and then hooked an arm around the guy's shoulders. "It's cool. I love buffets. There are all different kinds of food that way we can have whatever we want." They smiled. "But, if you really don't want to go to a buffet we can go somewhere else." They winked at him.

Nate smiled at the gesture “I love buffets too just didn’t think you’d choose one” he returned the bump “You won so you get to choose. If you sure that’s where you wanna go then we go there” he grinned. “So? Was running with me that terrible then?” he asked playfully

Zach sighed and rested his head against Nate. "The run was not fun. Not at all. I don't like waking up at six in the morning. Like...wow. It's bad. I could never do that. You're a crazy man." The Lyft car drove up next to them and opened the door for Nate. "Hop in man."

Nate chuckled at Zach’s response “Is not that bad. It’s all part of a routine I guess. I’m used to it so it’s not tiring or weird for me anymore.” He smiled and got in the car, kinda surprised by Zach’s antics. He wasn’t really used to guys who were as touchy as he was “Thanks! So You’ve been here for long?”

Zach shook his head again. "I can't imagine that ever being a part of my own routine." Zach slipped into the car next to Nate, greeting the Lyft driver, and settled back into the seat. "About a year. So...yeah?"

Nate shrugged “I’ve always been the kind of person who can’t sit still for a minute so I guess that’s part of it.” He didn’t mention how he spent a lot of time forced to be still than he didn’t like that anymore. “Cool! So you know all about how the institute works and all the cool places around right?”

Zach “Haha, some people would say you need Adderall.” Zach never needed anything like that, though...maybe it would have helped with their attention during math and science classes. Zach smirked at him. “Maybe I do, maybe I don’t. You’ll just have to find out.” They stuck their tongue out at him.

Nate smiled “Even if I need it it’s not a good idea for me to take it. I need to be very careful about medications” he said simply. “Now you’re just being coy and I’m not sure if you’re flirting or if it’s part of your personality” he said with a chuckle

Zach nodded, "Makes sense I guess." Zach winked at him and shrugged. "Guess you'll just have to find that out for yourself."

Nate didn’t add anything further to the medication comment, but he did laugh at the wink “Right now I think you’re a big tease” he said bumping their shoulders together. “We should try another bet, something you enjoy that you think I would enjoy too”

Zach stuck his tongue out at him. "If that's what you think, then I guess it's true." Zach thought it over a moment. "Hm...I dunno. The only thing I can really think of is sleeping in until twelve in the afternoon."

Nate tapped the tip of Zach's nose “Stop poking your tongue at me” he said with a chuckle. “Man! I haven’t slept in in years! Well… not alone anyway, but I just can’t do it, I keep tossing and turning and feel all achy” he sighed “Maybe I’ll try it during the winter break”

Zach “What are you gonna do to stop me?” Zach folded their arms. “Then I’ve won already. I’m amazing at this,” they teased. The car pulled up into the parking lot and Zach thanked the driver before hopping out of the car. “Let’s go! Food awaits.”

Nate shrugged “Keep doing it and you’ll find out” he answered just as his mom would when he didn’t stop doing something his mom didn’t like. “No! that’s cheating! I haven’t tried it!” he pouted, getting out of the car after thanking the driver. “I know this place! Food’s good. I used to come here with my school buddies”

Zach chuckled ,”Oo~, scary.” They looked back at Nate and smirked again, “Oh yea? Well, then you’re just gonna have to try it out then, huh?” They smiled. “Oh, yeah? Well good, that means I don’t have to worry too much about you being a picky eater. Let’s hurry before I die.”

Nate poked his ribs “First warning” he said with a playful smile. “Yeap! I’ll try it up and I’ll let you know. If I don’t like it then you win again, deal?” he said offering his hand. “Nope! No picky eater here. I love food” he smiled and tugged at Zack’s hand “Come on drama queen” he chuckled

Zach shrank away from the poke and stuck his tongue out at him again. Zach folded his arms and nodded, "Deal big man," he shook his hand. "Perfect. Coming to a buffet with a picky eater is the worst. You wouldn't think so...but it is." Zach followed after Nate, ready to eat their own weight in food.

Nate shook his head and smile “You can be a real pain” he teased. “Awesome!” he returned the shake. “I can imagine. I mean there are thing I don’t like but I’m not really a picky eater. Or I don’t think so. Most of my friends eat a lot, I’m kinda the healthy one but I still love food” he rambled a little as he followed Zach to the restaurant. “What’s your favorite food?”

Zach hummed, rubbing at their chin as they thought it over. "I dunno...probably seafood. Like...I really like crab legs...seasoned correctly of course. Lobster is pretty good. Different kinds of fish. I dunno. Can't just pick one, y'know? What's yours?"

Nate nodded “Good choice! I like shrimps better, but I know why you choose crab legs.” He smiled “I get it. Well for me it’s hard too, I love cheese so anything with cheese is my favorite. I love pizza and pasta!” he said excitedly, looking around once they were in the restaurant. “Look! Pizza!” he grinned pointing to the counter where you could find different kinds of pizzas

Zach raised an eyebrow at him. "Oh yeah? Why would choose crab legs over shrimp?" Zach chuckled, "Cheese? Hm...I'm too picky with cheese...I think the only one I really, really always love is grill cheese sandwiches." Zach looked down at the pizza and smirked, "Yeah? And look," they pointed, "There's some seafood over there."

Nate shrugged “The flavor’s richer! And you can pay for it” he chuckled. He faked an expression of shock, putting a hand over his chest “How is that even possible!? Like cheese is the best! All kinds of it-! Dude! You’re missing out” he chuckled. “True… I’m gonna go with you and check your choices and then I’ll stop for some pizza!” he smiled

Zach gave him a slightly confused look. "What's that mean? 'I can pay for it'?" Zach shook their head, "Nah, I really doubt it." The nodded, "Yeah, let's go for it!" They walked over to the seafood, grabbing a plate on the way. They had a bunch different kinds of food, little octopuses, shrimp, lobster pieces, fish, and... "Crab legs!" Zach took a couple of them and placed them on their plate.

Nate smiled “Crab and lobster are more expensive than shrimps so” he shrugged. He looked curiously at Zach’s food choice, scrunching his nose a little “now that’s one of the things I don’t like” he said pointing at the octopus “the texture is weird” he shuddered. He chuckled when his friend found the crab legs “Looks like you’re in luck today!”

Zach nodded, and wrinkled their nose as well. “Yup. I totally agree. I never really liked them either.” They nodded, “Yup, I so glad these are here. Do you want some? Or some fish?”

Nate shuddered again “Glad we think alike on that” he smiled, picking up a plate “Nah, I think maybe later, there’s a three cheese pizza waiting for me and I ran 10K this morning so I deserve a trait” he said happily walking to the pizza stand

Zach rolled his eyes. "Mhm, you're definitely cheesy." He couldn't believe the guy had ran 10k that morning. He felt tired just thinking about it. "Okay, go knock yourself out. Then we can find a table."

Nate smiled brightly, showing off his dimples “The cheesiest the better” he grinned and picked a couple of slices of pizza. “Ok, I have this for starters but we do need a table cause if I eat all these carbs I’m gonna need a salad too and some protein” he walked along with Zach to get a table not too far from the food stands

Zach shook their head at his buddy. “Geez, you really are a health nut.” They walked over toward a nearby empty table. They sat down at the table and Zach started to eat some of his food.

Nate chuckled and tilted his head “Well I kinda have to be” he said setting his plate down “I have a heart condition, so I need to take care of it a lot cause I’m in a bit more of a risk that everyone else. Need to be healthy to just be here” he smiled as he shared a bit of his story

Zach hummed, chewing slowly as they listened to Nate talk. "I guess that's about a good a reason as any to be healthy." Zach smiled. "Wish I had that kind of dedication."

Nate shrugged “When your life depends on it you don’t have many choices” he said taking a bite of his pizza, humming happily “This is amazing!” he grinned

Zach hummed again and nodded, "You got a point there." Zach chuckled, "Glad you're enjoying it so much."

Nate nodded “Yeap! Not a fun point but yeah” he smiled “It’s hard not to, it’s really good” he smiled and took another bite closing his eyes and chewing happily

Zach fell quiet and focused on eating their own food, humming softly to themselves as they ate. Once they finished their food they stood up. "I'm going to get more food. You coming or you still working on your pizza?"

Nate enjoyed the little silence as they both ate. “I’ll come with you, need a salad and the protein, remember?” he smiled and followed Zach to the stands, getting himself some steamed vegetables instead of the salad and some grilled chicken “So? Tell me more about you filmmaker!” he said with a smile as they sad again

Zach nodded, "I remember, and I need some beef." They patted their stomach. Zach ended up gathering more food on their plate and headed back to the table. "Hm...what exactly? My family life or just film stuff?"

Nate grinned “Really? I could check the beef” he nodded. He shrugged “Whatever you wanna tell me about. I’m not picky” he grinned

Zach hummed, drumming their fingers along the table top. "Well, I've been working with cameras since I was like 12...making a bunch of stupid little films with my friends."

Nate smiled “Really? That sounds cool! Like the super 8 kinds of films?” he asked excitedly, taking a bite of his vegetables

Zach shrugged, "Yeah, kinda. I mean...I wasn't a good writer back then, but I wanted to film literally everything when I younger."

Nate nodded “That sounds so cool man! Guess you’re writing now too right?” he asked excitedly. “What kind of films you wanna specialize in?”

Zach shrugged again, "I guess I'm better than I was at it, for sure." It would be hard not to with how much he did it. The question made Zach light up a bit. "I dunno...I really like horror movies. But that's because I think they work better for low budget stuff. Like...I could make a bunch of low budget romance movies I guess...but like, I don't wanna."

Nate grinned “Bet you are! You wouldn’t be here if you weren’t!” he pointed out and then hummed as he chewed some carrots. “So no romantic movies for you uh? I think horror movies also seem easier cause you actually have more specific ideas for the character no?” he tried to guess “Plus! Fake blood seems like fun” he chuckled

Zach "Who know? Maybe I only got in on my directorial talents." Zach shook their head. "I wouldn't say no romantic movies. But...I would say it's not something I would do as my first choice. And...well, they just make better for lower budgets I think. Although, I do have a great love for shitty horror movies." They nodded. "Fake blood that taste like maple syrup is pretty good if I'm being honest."

Nate smiled “I doubt it. You must be the whole talent package” he shrugged. “Oh ok, I get it. And maybe you’re right, I really don’t know much about that tho. I don’t think I’ve seen many romantic low budget movies and there are tons of horror ones.” He looked at Zach surprised “Really? That’s how it taste like?”

Zach nodded, "I certainly hope so!" Zach glanced over at his friend and hummed. "You probably have...I mean, a romance it just two people falling in love. Don't need a lot of money for that kind of thing. Maybe for some neat locations though." Zach took a sip of water, laughing. "It taste like maple syrup!"

Nate hummed “Maybe but I have no idea what budget a movie needs tho” he shrugged again. “Yeah the locations must be expensive tho. Dude! If you ever make a horror movie I’m all in to be killed to try that fake blood” he offered with a bright smile

Zach laughed and smacked their hand on the table a couple of times. They shook their head, "Yeah...I'll keep that in mind while I work on a movie." They nudged their shoulders together. "Thanks man."

Nate returned the bump “Anytime, bud” he nodded and took a sip of his water. “So you have like small films project or stuff like that t the institute? I’m still trying to figure out how that place works”

Zach took another sip of their water, setting down their cup with a small sigh. Zach nodded, "Yeah...I mean, I gotta make a student film at the end of my degree. But I try to do some small film projects to work on my director's eye."

Nate smiled “dude that’s so cool, well I’m all up to help if I can with those film projects. Sounds like fun and I could give you some points of view on the photography” he said before taking the last bite of his veggies

Zach hummed, rubbing at their chin. "Hm," they said, "What are you doing during winter break?"

Nate shrugged “Not much, just schoolwork and actual work, why?” he asked curiously

Zach "Well I'm thinking doing like...a small thing," they said, poking at their food. "I haven't really thought much about it yet. But if you're gonna be around...maybe I'll look you up," they smiled at him.

Nate‘s face brightened up “Dude! That sounds great. I’ll be up for everything, no problem dude, thanks” he grinned and finished his food “I can even help you find cool places to shoot”

Zach hadn't expected the enthusiasm of Nate's reaction, but they couldn't say they didn't appreciate it. "I'm glad you're ready to go! It's always nice to work with someone who's excited!"

Nate grinned “Awesome! Well I’m always excited to do new things dude. It’s one of the best things in life and it keeps it all from being dull and boring” he explained “Maybe you can repay the favor modeling for me one day”

Zach patted his shoulder. "That's good, I know too many people who don't wanna take life by the horns!" Zach laughed. "Sure, I'd love to!"

Nate smiled at the pat “We only have one life and it can end at any given moment so why not take advantage of the here and now?” he said with a charming smile. “Awesome! I’ll let you know when it’ll be the best time. I’m sure I’m gonna have projects soon”

Zach nodded, "Yeah, I know too many people who simply are too jaded." Zach grinned. "Okay, just keep me posted."

Nate set his fork down and finished his water “Guess you could show them a different side but I guess not everyone is up to see life in a more positive way.” He nodded “Will do! You up for dessert now or you wanna go back?”

Zach waved a hand at him. "Please, it takes too much effort. Like...yeah, it's important, but I don't got time to be chasing after people." Zach looked back toward the buffet. "I'm gonna go look, real quick. Hold on!"

Nate nodded “You’re right there, it’s better to focus only on living your own life” he smiled. He chuckled “Ok, no problem, I’ll wait here” he smirked and waited for Zach

Zach went searching through the buffet, looking over all the sweets they had to offer. They finally settled on some cake and cookies. "Okay," they said as they sat back down. "After this, then we can go."

Nate smiled when he saw Zach coming back with some cookies and cake “Can I steal one of your cookies?2 he asked before reaching out for one. “No rush at all, I don’t have anything else to do after this”

Zach raised their eyebrows, smirking and pushed their plate toward Nate. "Go for it." Zach smiled, "Well, what do you wanna do after this then?"

Nate grinned “Thanks!” he said before taking the cooking, biting it and humming happily. “Up to you! We could walk around or I could show you some cool places downtown or you could show me some cool places at the institute”

Zach smirked. "Let's go downtown and then back up to the school! It'll be fun!"

Nate nodded “Great! Sounds like a plan” he agreed as he ate his cookie happily

Zach ate the rest of their food, pushing their plate back and patting their stomach. "God...that was delicious." They took a deep breath. "Okay, let's go."

Nate chuckled at the way Zach pushed the plate away “It was! It was a great choice to come here” he grinned and stood up, getting his wallet to pay

Zach "So, you wanna walk downtown," he asked, "Or you wanna take a car?"

Nate shrugged “We can walk unless you’re feeling especially lazy” he teased

Zach laughed, "We're getting a ride then. I always feel lazy," they stuck their tongue out at him again, and gathered up the plates, moving to set them in a dish bin.

Nate huffed “It was just a little walk!” he complained a little and helped Zach with the dishes to then move to the checkout area to pay. “You’re gonna need to get used to walk more when you hang out with me”

Zach shrugged, "Shoulda just picked a walk then. Leaving it up to me will always end up in a ride." Once everything was paid for Zach hooked arms with Nate and walked out of the buffet. "Let's go!"

Nate chuckled “Well you can pick this time and I’ll pick next time” he added and smiled when Zach hooked his arm with Nate’s “Let’s go then… what would you like to see first?”

Zach shook their head. "No, no, no" they said, "You're gonna lead me around. I'm leading you around the school and you're leading me downtown."

Nate smiled “Alright, bud! I’ll show you the best places. Hope you’re ready to walk and we can start checking the amusement parks or a gallery or a museum” he suggested “you tell me”

Zach hummed, "A museum sounds good," they said with a small shrug of his own. "Then you can lead me anywhere you want."

Nate nodded “I think I know the right museum then” he grinned. “Sounds perfect, let’s get going the. Bet you won’t regret it”

Zach smiled as well, "I better not." Zach hummed as they walked along, hiking his shoulders up toward his ears. "Is it gonna take long?"

Nate smiled “I’m sure you won’t” he assured as they kept walking “nope, not too long but if you’re cold I can lend you my scarf” he offered as he kept on walking towards the museum, hoping they indeed had a good time

#Paying bets #Para: Zach

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didiletyouknooow · 7 years

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54. Turn It Again

Hey,

like I said, here is the next chapter!

As you might have noticed I do some time jumps in the last and also in this new chapter. I hope it’s not too confusing! For all the people who want to know in which year we’re in this current chapter: it’s 2018 (at the end of the chapter). Yes, I can take a look into the future haha. No it’s just fiction :D

Thank you for reading and I hope you like this chapter! __________

December

After the worst flight of my life we finally landed in LAX. Since it was Sebastian’s first time in LA he was very excited to discover this city. Plus, with me he had a local who would take him to the hotpots AND show him the insiders.

But first we headed to my parents’ house. Now I was the one who was excited because I really hoped that my parents would like him. I mean, I didn’t know if there was anything not to like about Sebastian because to me he was the best guy in the world, but my parents often had a different opinion.

So we arrived at my parents’ house and my mom welcomed us with arms wide open. I think it only took her five minutes to like Sebastian. While we had a coffee and enjoyed the cake my mother made – a typical German habit to drink coffee and have a piece of cake in the afternoon – my parents and Sebastian were lost in a conversation about cars. I was never really into cars so I couldn’t do my bit but I didn’t care. I was just glad that they all got along very well.

Christmas came and passed by. Sebastian and I spent it with my family. I was so fucking happy to see my brother and my little nieces again. They grew so fast! The last time I saw them they were so little but now Liam was already five years old! He was running in my parent’s garden playing football with my brother – you know, not the American Football. Of course my family was eager to hear how my life in Berlin was like and I told them everything about the past nine months. It was still weird that I would live there for the next two years. My mother started crying again when I mentioned it but when she saw how happy my new boyfriend made me she was happy with me that after my heartbreaking split from Josh I finally found a new guy.

Speaking of Josh. I didn’t hear anything from him in the past months. I only congratulated him on his birthday in October and he thanked me. That’s all. But maybe that’s just life. Sometimes people disappear out of your life because everyone is moving on.

January

After spending New Years Eve with my boyfriend at a romantic restaurant in Venice I finally met Molly again. We didn’t have any contact for six months since I left LA but she was the one who texted me again in November. She apologized that she didn’t respond to any message I sent her during my first weeks in Berlin. She was the one who decided to cut our contact and with it she kind of cut our friendship either. But when I received her long and detailed mail where she apologized and told me how difficult the past months for her were I answered her and thanked her for being so open to me. This was the moment we started staying in contact again. So when I told her that I would come home to LA for Christmas and New Years Eve we arranged a lunch date. Of course we went to our favorite café in Echo Park. Just like we did when I was still living in LA.

“Wow, when was the last time we saw each other?” Molly asked while we were hugging. “Months ago” I joked. “Definitely….almost a year ago!” She was right. It was already January 3 so we didn’t see each other for ten months now. “How are you?” was the first question she asked me. So I answered. We sat down and ordered our favorite coffee. I started telling her about Sebastian and showed her a picture. “Honestly, I never thought you would meet someone who can make you look so happy again!” she finally said after she heard the story of Sebastian’s and my little romance. “Well, sometimes it happens” I grinned. “I bet he’s a good guy. Although I don’t know him but….I can imagine he is. You don’t fall in love very easily” I only answered with a smile and finally asked her “What about you?”

Suddenly Molly started grinning and smiling like if she would be hiding something. When she looked down on her belly I knew she was! “Well, something’s changed….I’m pregnant!” “Wooooow! Really?” “Yes…” “How long do you know?” “Only for a few weeks….my doc found out by accident. It was only the fourth week” “So how far are you?” “Six weeks. I know it’s still not save but….we hope. We really do” “Okay….I hope so too! When is the date?” “In August….” “Great! A summer child!” I said happily. “Sorry Eileen, I didn’t know if it’s okay to tell you since…you know what I mean….I just couldn’t hide it” “I know!” I said. “And you shouldn’t hide it! You and Eric will be great parents and I’m just really happy that you’re finally pregnant” “Now we only have to pray that nothing will happen” “It won’t!” I said.

While we had lunch it all felt as it used to be. I was so happy to finally reconnect with Molly. She became one of my best friends in LA so it was very hard not to know how she was feeling the whole last year. Surely there was one topic I couldn’t beat about the bush. “So um” I started. “Do you know how Josh is doing?” Molly looked at me as if she wanted to say ‘I knew you would ask me this question’. But I think she misunderstood me. I didn’t ask because I was so curious about his life and what was going on, instead I only wanted to make sure that he was fine. After everything he told me the last time we saw each other before I left for Berlin I was a bit worried about him. “He’s fine” she grinned. “Really, he’s doing fine. The Chilis ended their world tour in October and when he came back he immediately called the Dots to hang out and jam. They wrote a lot of new songs in the past months. Eric said Josh is like the old Josh he used to know” “That’s great news!” I respond. “Yeah, I don’t know if you’ve heard about it but….he had some struggles in the past year. His behavior worried all of us and Eric tried to talk to him during the summer months before the Chilis went to Europe but Josh didn’t listen. When they came back Josh kind of fell into a sort of limbo, Eric said. He tried to give himself a therapy with music. When Eric saw Josh for the first time in months in August he looked so fucked up Eric told me. They talked for hours and Josh shared his problems with him. He was feeling very bad after you left for Berlin, Eileen. In fact Josh was at his lowest point in his life. He had a lot of girls as a rebound. Eric said, Josh didn’t want to feel anymore. He hated his feelings no matter if they were good or bad. Then there was this journalist from Poland who he has hooked up with during the European tour last year. One months later he met her in LA and even let her sleep in his house….whatever” she stopped talking for a few seconds because maybe it was too awkward to tell Josh’s ex what he was probably doing with these girls. But I was okay with it. I was over it. “Well, whatever….one day he found her posting private pics and an article on the internet. She almost sent it to her boss in Poland. Turned out that all she wanted was to write an exclusive home story about him. He kicked her out of his house and according to Eric this was the moment Josh realized how much he has changed over the months. He stayed away from women and he really did. He was single for a few months now” “Okay….wow this sounds crazy. What a crazy woman!” “Yeah, it was!” Molly said. “We couldn’t believe it when we heard about this story. Eric said he has never ever seen Josh so fucked up. But over the past months he regained his composure and did great. Eric and I were at a few concerts in New York in September and even in Rio and later in Glendale. We wanted to be there for him, you know. I think he felt very lonely at that time but he’s doing much better since September”

I was surprised what happened to Josh and his life in the last year. While I was doing great, met Sebastian and felt in love again, he must’ve been through one of his worst years. I felt so bad when Molly told me about it because I blamed myself for it. I felt like I was the reason he was feeling so bad.

“Eileen” Molly finally said. “Don’t blame yourself. You’re not the reason that he was getting to his lowest point in his life. Josh was always someone who had some struggles and he was always blaming himself for it….you’re not the reason” “But I broke up with him. I broke his heart” I suddenly said what I’ve never said out loud before. “Yes, but….he’s old enough and he should’ve handled the situation like a grown up. But he lost himself in a lake of girls on tour. You know, musicians don’t have normal lifestyles. We both know it. And I’m very happy that Eric isn’t someone who is known in the world. He’s only a touring musician but even so he’s always on the road. But Josh is playing in one of the biggest bands in the world and we both know that there are opportunities, that they’re always living in luxury hotels….even if Josh doesn’t like it, he lives this lifestyle. So, it’s easy to let this lifestyle catch him. He chose this way. He chose these girls. We both know that it’s not what he wants in life. It’s not easy for him to fall in love but when he’s in love, he’s serious about it” “I know, he was always serious with me” “See, he’s a good guy although he made some bad decisions in the past” “Yes….” “But right now he’s doing great. I can confirm it” she said with a smile. “That’s good to know and I’m relieved to hear that” I said but there was another question that was on my mind. “And does he finally have found someone new?” I asked carefully because she mentioned that Josh was single for a few months. I didn’t want to sound so curious but after hearing the whole story about his past year I was curios. I don’t know why. “Hm” Molly started grinning. “I think so” “You think so?” “Yes, well….” She definitely didn’t want to tell me. “I think he’s seeing someone. It’s going on for two months now. But she’s living in London” “Do I now her?” “I don’t know….she’s a musician. I’ve never heard of her before but Eric knows her. Her name is M.I.A., she’s a hip hop and RnB musician and Josh met her when he visited Danger Mouse-Brian in the studio. He was working with her on a new record at that time.” “M.I.A.? I’ve heard of her before!” I said. “There are even some paparazzi pics on the internet I think. He was in London with her for the past weeks. He even spent New Years Eve there” “And do you think it’s something serious?” “Hm, I don’t know. She seems smart and very self-confident, very pretty and she’s even a few years older than him. I only met her once at a birthday party but….I can’t tell you if it’s something serious. I think they’re only dating. And I don’t know if the distance with London – LA will work.” “He hates long distance relationships” “See” Molly said. “So, I don’t think it will work but we’ll see. I wish he would find someone who can make him happy” “Yes, me too” I said a bit lost in thoughts.

Back home I thought about what Molly told me about Josh. He seemed to have a very bad year and I felt so bad. I blamed myself that he was so fucked up. I think I’ve never hurt someone so much. And I never was the reason that someone felt so miserable. I was surprised that Josh probably hooked up with so many girls. Usually he wasn’t like that. But maybe it was the touring thing. Some day the lifestyle gets you. Sebastian came back from one of his hikes in the mountains together with my brother. I was so relieved that he was getting along so well with my family. “Is everything okay?” he asked me and gave me a kiss. “Yes, why are you asking?” “You look a bit lost in thoughts and worried. Why?” “Because” I started explaining. “Molly told me about a friend of mine who had a tough time in the past year. I just thought about it” “Oh, well I hope he’s doing better now” Sebastian smiled. I felt so bad for lying to him.

Sebastian and I spent the next days doing a little road trip through California. We visited San Jose, Santa Barbara and San Francisco and it was our first holiday together! I could see that he definitely fell in love with California and he even told me he could understand if I want to go back some day. I didn’t respond because I didn’t know how. After three weeks of warm and sunny California we flew home to Berlin to go back to our daily life in the cold and snowy city.

April

“Why are you always putting your ugly socks on the pillow? I find that disgusting!” I was shouting at Sebastian while making our bed. I moved in with him one month ago and although it was great I have to admit that we had a lot more discussions and fights since then. “Sorry but why do you care? I only put it on my pillow!” he defended himself. “Well, but sometimes I also lay on your pillow and….eghhh, I just find it disgusting” Sebastian rolled his eyes. “Seriously? Are we fighting over a fucking sock I put on my pillow?” “Did you ever smell at it?” I asked him, still disgusted. “Eileen, seriously, this is just stupid” he said and left.

Well, that’s what he was always doing when we have a fight. He leaves.

I hated this behavior. None of my boyfriends just went away and left while having a discussion. Even Josh stayed and we figured it out – most of the times. But Sebastian had this great talent to just excuse himself and then leaves.

I missed LA. I really did. Although I was living in Berlin for more than one year now and really liked my job, I sometimes missed my home town. I missed the sun, the warm temperature, the wind, the smell of the ocean. I missed everything. I missed my parents, my brother, my whole family and friends. Sometimes I called my brother in the middle of the night and cried. I don’t know why I did it. I don’t know why I behaved like this in the last months. But since I came back to Berlin after the three weeks in LA during the Christmas break something’s changed. I was so emotional when I heard someone talking about LA, when I saw a film that was taking place in LA, even when someone only mentioned “California”.

Was it the right decision to stay in Berlin?

I sat down at our bed with the smell of the ugly sock on Sebastian’s pillow and turned on my laptop. I was checking mails and all this stuff. Then I logged into Facebook and after scrolling through my time line I checked out Josh’s account. I didn’t do this in months. He barely posted pictures but sometimes he did. I found one picture he posted in February. It showed him in London in front of a record store. I wondered if maybe this singer he was probably dating took this picture? But he didn’t post anything related to her. Although I found her account on Facebook – I felt like Sherlock Holmes again – I couldn’t find any related things to Josh. Maybe they didn’t want to show it in public.

Two minutes later I googled it. I found a few pictures that were taken of them in London and New York. Seemed like she also lived in New York for a while. The pictures were taken in December in London and in February in New York. They were walking down the streets. On one picture they were holding hands and in one picture Josh was ordering some donuts on the streets of New York. They were also pictured at a Bruce Springsteen concert and at a Lakers Game.

I even found an interview where she was asked about him and about their work together on her new record after some paparazzi pictures appeared on the internet. Her answer was glorious.

“You know, he’s a great musician and I really look up to him. Working with Brian and him was great. He’s coming from a totally different style of music. I love rock and funk and I always loved the Chili Peppers but I didn’t know him before”

But now you do? There were some paparazzi pictures posted of you two. Seems like you really like each other…. (Laughs) Well, if you wanna write it that way, do it. We ‘really like each other’. Maybe we spent more time together than only in the studio….but, let’s keep talking about my record and not about my lover”

I liked her answer. She seemed smart and funny. That’s what Josh likes the most. I didn’t really know her music so I listened to one of her songs on Youtube. Oh right, she did the soundtrack for “Slumdog Millionaire”. And she didn’t only do her new record with Danger Mouse aka Brian Burton, even Josh worked on this record wit her. In one article it was mentioned that even Josh would produce one of her songs. Well, that sounded great. Maybe he was better preserved with a musician? Maybe she understood his lifestyle, his tour schedule, why he’s always hiding in his music room? They can do music together, jam out and have a good time while I couldn’t do this. Maybe she isn’t so jealous like I was back in the days. Maybe everything is better with her than with me? Plus, she is from Britain and we all know how much he loves everything that’s British.

Oh my god, how did I sound? I was only watching some music videos of the woman Josh was probably dating and wondered if he was happy. Plus, I was stalking him on social media. If he ever did this? Stalking my social media accounts? I don’t think so….

While looking at this paparazzi photos of them I tried to figure out how good they were matching as a couple. In my opinion she was a really beautiful and great woman but she didn’t really match to Josh. Or was I just….jealous?

July

Back in LA! I loved it! Molly and Eric invited me to a Baby Shower for their unborn baby who would probably be born on August 20. So the baby would share its birthday date with Andrew Garfield! What a pleasure haha.

This time Sebastian and I could sleep in my brother’s house because he was on holiday with his family during that time. It was sad that I wouldn’t see Marc and his family this time when I came to LA but I was so thankful that Sebastian and I didn’t have to sleep in my parents’ house like we did during the Christmas weeks. Sure, my parents’ house is very big and we even had two rooms only for us but it always feels weird sleeping with your boyfriend in the same house like your parents. I felt like being 17 again. Well, I didn’t even had a boyfriend at that time but still…it felt weird.

Before heading to the Baby Shower we did a hike to the Griffith Observatory, something Sebastian wanted to visit because we couldn’t do it last time. We watched the sunset there and then went back home to cook some pasta. I loved cooking with him but he was such a bad cooker. Mostly I was the one who was doing it. He loved eating.

The next day we went to the Baby Shower. We gifted Molly with some romper suit and other baby stuff we already bought in a vintage shop in Berlin. She thanked us and was happy to finally meet Sebastian again. She already liked him when they both met for the first time in January during a dinner at Molly’s and Eric’s house.

Molly offered us some drinks and went to greet other guests. Eric came to us and I was happy seeing him again. I congratulated him again for becoming a father very soon. I guess he was very excited and also a little bit scared.

After an afternoon full of baby stuff, baby talks and even muffins with baby faces Molly thanked everyone who came and almost started crying because she was so happy. Her dream would come true in a few weeks and I think she couldn’t be happier.

When I thought that all guests already arrived there was one person who was probably late. It was Josh. My heart was in my mouth when I saw him for the first time after 16 months. Yes I counted them.

He looked good. Very healthy. Much better than on pics from the tour last year.

I watched him greeting Eric and of course Molly. He also had a gift for her. He also gave her a little romper suit for the baby with a guitar on it. I chuckled when I saw it. This was typical for Josh. He definitely didn’t see me yet. Meanwhile I was watching him while he was talking to Molly and Eric. He was smiling all over his face and when Molly left them to talk to another friend I saw him talking to Eric for quite some time. “Is this Josh?” Sebastian suddenly asked me. “Um, over there? Yes he is” I said. “Okay” Sebastian didn’t seem impressed. He was totally cool. At least he looked like that.

Although Josh didn’t see us yet it didn’t take long until our eyes finally met. He seemed unsure if he should come over to approach us so I was the one who went to him. “Hey” I said smiling. “Hey” he said and smiled back. No handshake, no hug, no….um yes no bodily contact at all. “How are you?” I wanted to know. “Well, I’m fine. How about you….two?” he said and finally looked at Sebastian. I don’t have to mention that this situation was very weird for me. It’s always weird if your actual boyfriend meets your ex boyfriend. It’s weird for every person included. “Oh um, this is Sebastian, my….boyfriend” I finally introduced him. “Hey, I’m Josh” he said and they shook hands. “I’m doing great” I started talking again. “I heard you’re still living in Berlin” Josh said. “Yes, I do. At least for the next one and a half years” “Wow, that’s a long time” “It is…but it’s over very fast so….” “And then? Do you come back to LA?” he asked and maybe he realized that this question was not so appropriate. I didn’t know what to say. I wanted to say ‘Yes’ because in the last months I realized how much I missed my home town. But I couldn’t say it in front of Sebastian. “Well, let’s see” I said diplomatic. Josh chuckled. It was Eric who saw this fiasco and rescued all of us. He asked Josh to come to his music room to show him something. So the two left the party for a while.

Sebastian didn’t seem interested or even impressed by the fact that my ex was here. He once told me that he saw the Chili Peppers live one time but it was long ago when they were still playing with John. He has never really heard of Josh before he met me. He only knew his name.

________________________________________________

Two days prior….

I was having a coffee with Brian in my favorite book café the “Stories Books and Café” in Echo Park. I liked hanging out here. Sometimes I even came here alone, just picked up a book, ordered a coffee and read for a few hours. The waiters here already knew me and they even knew how I liked my coffee. No one recognized me here so I liked the atmosphere and all these great books but I hated that I will never have the time to read them all.

This time I wasn’t on my own. Brian and I didn’t see each other in a long time which felt like years. Although we both worked together with M.I.A. on her new record. But it was months ago. “What’s up?” Brian asked me when he sat down. “Good man, everything’s fine. I like this place. Books, coffee, friends….what else do I need?” “Music!” “Oh right!” I laughed. We talked about our lives. Brian did a few other music projects in the last months while I was mostly working with the Dots on a new record. We planned to release a new record at the end of the year but I knew that it would finally be released in spring next year because we couldn’t find enough time to finish it. We even talked about a tour through the states. We all knew clubs and locations where we could play. Starting from the bottom so to say. I liked this idea. The last concerts with Dot Hacker were long ago and I really wanted this band to go on stage very soon. Brian liked this idea either. “You should do that. I mean, this project is your baby, right?” “It is! Always was” “So, you should kick your ass and go on the road. I bet it’s a great experience. I mean, totally different than with the Chilis” “It’s totally different and I like playing these small venues” “Do it! I could join you as a DJ or something like that” he joked. “I could be your guitar tech” “Oh thanks bro but I don’t think I will need someone. I will bring my own stuff” “And to be honest, I don’t wanna be your guitar tech. You’re so sophisticated and you can get angry very fast” he laughed. “Well, yeah….” I rolled my eyes. “So how are the Chilis doing?” “Great, we’re working on new stuff but right now everyone is on vacation” I told him.

We decided not to work again with Brian. I think there were too many discrepancies during the work of The Getaway.

“Everyone is on vacation but you….Why am I not surprised about that?” he asked me. “I don’t know” I chuckled. “Hey, wanna join me. I’m going on vacation with some friends on a boat next week” “Well, thank you. That’s not my thing I guess. I just wanna stay in LA. I was often away in the past months, I often flew to London….” ”Yes but that’s months ago bro! You and M.I.A. broke up in March!” “I know….but still. I wanna enjoy my time in LA” “Okay….” “Um by the way….how is she doing? Didn’t you see her last week?” I asked him. “Yeah, she’s fine. She’s touring right now. I was at her first show in Liverpool. It was great! You know, her concerts are always great” “Yes I know” I met M.I.A. in November last year when she was recording her new record together with Brian. She was in the studio singing when I entered it. I was so blown away by her voice. I only knew her rapping. But she has a pretty good voice. Plus, I was always a fan of her song “Paper Plans”. So we started talking and met several times in the following weeks. Since I was bored of hooking up with young girls and wanted to stay single for a longer time I didn’t want to date her but things changed and I started liking her very much. We spent much time together in the following months and I even spent New Years Eve with her and her friends in London. It was a great time and she’s a great person but our romance ended when we both were busy making music in our home towns. She didn’t want to move to LA and I didn’t want to go to London. So we ended it but decided to stay friends.

Brian and I spent the whole afternoon and evening in the bar, had some sandwiches and he even showed me some new stuff he did for an upcoming film. He was so busy. I think he was even busier than I was.

Suddenly a woman came to our table. While I was pretending to read the menu card because I didn’t want her to recognize me, Brian was looking at her, maybe hoping she would recognize him and knew who he was. But she didn’t know anyone of us. “Hey um excuse me but, could one of you please take a picture of me and my friend?” she asked. When Brian was nodding and got up from his chair his phone rang. “Oh sorry I have to take this, it’s my girlfriend” he said and disappeared. So the woman looked at me. I got up and took her phone to make a picture of the two women at the table next to us. “Thank you” the woman said and I just smiled at them and gave the phone back. “Thank you very much. Now we have a good memory of this day” the other woman said. I smiled at her too and while I was doing it I realized how pretty her face was. She looked so natural. Her long brown hair was a bit curly. She smiled but then looked back at her friend. I went back to our table and Brian grinned at me. “Why are you grinning?” I asked him. “This girl is cute, isn’t she?” “Don’t you remember what you said just two minutes ago? You have a girlfriend?” “Well, not for me….I mean, for you bro. I feel like you need a new woman in your life. You’re single for a few months now and I think it’s time for the right woman” “Well, I think I already met her” “Josh” he said. “Don’t make yourself so weak. Eileen is history. She’s away and she’s taken” “I know…what a pity” I said sarcastic. “Well….why don’t you go to the table and ask her for her number?” “No….I’ve never really done this before” I said. “Never? You’re 38 years old man” Brian laughed. “We all did it!” “Well, maybe when I was younger but I didn’t do it in the last years” “Come one…..not every girl is falling on your shoes backstage” “I know….and I don’t want one of these girls again” “Well, what do you want?” “I want….uagh” I sighed. “I’m very tired of everything that happened last year” “What? You were so confident at that time! Where is this Josh now?” “Well, I think this confidence was only caused by all these girls I hooked up with” “Yeah, you were my man last year” Brian laughed. “No…I wasn’t. Believe me, it didn’t give me anything” “Come one, you’re a musician. Sometimes we have to take the advantages” Brian grinned. “No. I’m just very tired of meaningless sex. I had a lot of it last year! I wanna have meaningful sex! I wanna feel something, I wanna feel emotions, I wanna care about a person, I wanna be there for this person, I wanna share my life with this person, I want romance and all this stuff” “Wow man, that’s some romantic shit” Brian chuckled. “I know….and I think I’ve already met the right person with whom I had everything” “No….it’s never too late. No one only has one big love. There are more. I’m convinced that there are more big loves for a specific life time” “Well, if you think so….I don’t know what to think anymore. I just know that I don’t want to hook up again. I don’t wanna have a woman lying under me whom I don’t really know” “See, it’s time for a real woman and I think this woman over there looks very pretty and normal. She seems to be your age. Maybe she’s single. Maybe the two meet here and her friend tells her all the boring stories about her boyfriend and the pretty woman wishes she could do the same but she’s single for a few years now and wants to meet the right guy soon” “Yeah, probably” I said sarcastic. “Well, it’s your choice” Brian said and asked the waiter for the bill. “Sorry but I have to leave now. You know, Lousiana is waiting for me. There is something wrong with our washing machine so I have to take a look at it. Thanks for the evening bro, bye” Brian said and left.

Well, I wished I could say this sentence too some day. I wished my girlfriend for years would call me just to tell me that there is something wrong with the washing machine and ask me to take a look at it. But instead I was sitting in my favorite café wondering what went wrong. I took a look around. There were so many couples here. I hated them. I hated couples. But at the same time I wanted to be part of one. Feeling home, loved, cared….I loved this stuff. My last encounters didn’t take long. Although I really liked M.I.A. or Mathangi, how her real name was, I didn’t love her. It was a good time, we had a short romantic love story but nothing more. Since Eileen broke up with me I didn’t fell in love and it was already 1.5 years ago. Although I slept with so many girls in the past year they had nothing on Eileen. The biggest struggle in this case was that Eileen probably fell in love again.

I watched the two women at the table next to us for a while. They were talking and definitely having a good time. The brunette woman’s smile was so beautiful that I kind of was paralyzed by it. She had such a pretty face and I really liked her style. It was nothing fashionable. She looked more like a hippie. I liked that. Suddenly I got a call from Jonathan who asked me if I have time to come to the rehearsal room, he had an idea for a song. So I paid my bill and wanted to leave. But then I remembered Brian’s words. ‘It’s your choice’.

So I went over to the two women. They smiled when they saw me. “Hey um, I usually don’t do this and I can totally understand if you think that’s weird” I said and looked at the brown haired lady. “But….here’s is my phone number. I would be pleased if you would call me and maybe….we can have a coffee here” I gave her a piece of paper where I’ve written my number on. “Oh and by the way, my name is Josh” I said and shook her hand. “Helen” she smiled but was definitely a bit surprised. The other woman just laughed. “Okay, I have to go now” I said and then left the café.

Well, now it was her choice.

I looked at my phone on a regular basis the next two days but the lady didn’t call. Maybe it was a stupid idea to ask her out in front of her friend. I bet they started laughing after I left the café. Whatever, I had to go to Molly’s and Eric’s Baby Shower. I really didn’t want to but my best friend would become a father in a few weeks so I couldn’t stay away from this party. I already bought a little romper suit for the baby with guitars on it. I thought it would be a cute idea. Then this baby would learn from the get go who uncle Josh was. I liked the idea of being an uncle. Eric asked me if I would be the baby’s godfather. Honestly, when he asked me I almost cried because suddenly I realized we both weren’t these two musicians anymore who only lived for music and who were touring around the world. Now he had his own family to care about. And what about me? Well….sometimes I thought about the loss of my baby with Eileen. It would’ve been almost two years now…..

When I came to the shower it was already very crowded. Molly and Eric welcomed me and I gave Molly my present. She liked it and found the guitars on the romper suit very cute. Eric and I got lost in a talk until I finally saw her. Eileen. I knew she would be here, Eric already told me before. But I didn’t know she would be here with him. Her boyfriend.

I didn’t know if I should approach them so Eileen was the one who came to welcome me. Honestly, it was as awkward as I thought it would be. Meeting the new guy of your ex isn’t a pleasure at all. “Hey” she said smiling. “Hey” I said and tried to smile back. There was no handshake or hug. “Well, I’m fine. How about you?” she said and then introduced me to her new guy. “Oh um, this is Sebastian, my….boyfriend” I heard Eileen saying but I didn’t really listen to it. I looked at him. He had brown short hair, he wore big glasses and his clothing style was the total opposite of mine. He wore skinny jeans and a band t-shirt. I didn’t know the band. I just suggested it was a band. He gave me his hand. “Hey, I’m Josh” I said and shook his hand. I think we both didn’t want to but we pretended to be nice to one another. “I heard you’re still living in Berlin” I finally said to Eileen. “Yes, I do. At least for the next one and a half years” she told me. “Wow, that’s a long time” “It is…but it’s over very fast so….” She said. “And then? Do you come back to LA?” I asked and maybe I shouldn’t have asked this question because it was inappropriate to ask it in front of her boyfriend who was from Berlin but….I didn’t care. “Well, let’s see” she said diplomatic.

Honestly, seeing Eileen again brought me back to the feeling I felt the whole last year. I didn’t want it. I didn’t want to let it happen to me again. I definitely didn’t want to look for a rebound girl all over again. I was so done with it. I needed to look forward.

I stayed at the Baby Shower for a few hours and was pleased when Eric took me to his music room to discuss some things for the Dots. After we came back some guests already went home. Eileen and her boyfriend were still there. I stood in the corner of the hall and watched them. They looked very happy together. That was a fact. She definitely looked happy. She smiled and laughed and told jokes, she was in a good mood. She looked good. Although she probably gained a bit weight she looked sexy. I always liked her curvy body and I couldn’t understand why all the girls I hooked up with were mostly very skinny. Maybe I wanted someone who couldn’t remind me of Eileen.

I went into the kitchen to get me something to drink. Eric followed me. “Man, is it hard seeing Eileen with a new guy?” he asked me. “Well, I get used to it. It’s okay for me. I mean, it’s over for 1.5 years” “Yes but….it’s never really over. There are still some feelings and emotions left after a serious relationship” he said. “I know this feeling” “Hm, maybe there are” “Sorry I didn’t warn you but I didn’t know that she would bring him to the party. A few weeks ago she didn’t know if he would have time to join her” “Eric, it’s okay. I’m over it” I finally said and looked at him. “Really?” he wondered. I had the feeling that since the break up from Eileen every of my friend was worrying about me because I seemed so weak and kind of got lost for a while. But I found myself again. I was back. I was the old Josh again. The Josh who didn’t look for a rebound. The Josh who didn’t compare every woman to Eileen. The Josh who didn’t sit in a corner crying the whole day. I was okay and I wasn’t even hurt seeing her with her new guy. Sure, it was weird and I didn’t like this guy because he had everything I wished I could have. “Josh, are you really okay with it?” Eric asked me. “Yes I am!” I finally said with a louder voice. “I’m okay. I’m Josh again” “Well, you don’t have to shout at me” Eric told me. “But I have the feeling that all of my friends care too much about me and wonder if I’m okay. ‘Oh hopefully he won’t go back to old habits’, ‘Oh hopefully he won’t fall into a limbo again’ or ‘Oh hopefully he will find a real woman’. You know what? Maybe I found a real woman!” I finally told him. I surprised myself saying this but it just came out of my mouth. “Really?” Eric asked. “Yes….um, I met a woman a while ago” “Wow, sounds great. How’s her name?” “Um she…..her name is” oh fuck, how was her name again?

Then my phone rang. I looked at it. It was a message by an unknown number. I opened it.

“Hey,

I usually don’t answer guys who ask me out like this – not that it happens all the time haha – but you looked so nice and you did the photo of me and my friend and now we have this great memory of this great day and….I have the feeling I owe you something. So, if you’re still interested we could meet tomorrow evening in the book café (what’s its name again? You know, the café where we met. I liked the sandwiches there! Best sandwiches in LA!). What about 7pm?

Helen

P.S. sorry that I wrote such a long message, usually I don’t do this

P.P.S. Usually I don’t say ‘usually’ so often”

I smiled after reading this message and looked into Erics questioned face. “Her name is Helen” I finally said grinning. “What a lovely name” Eric said. “It is….and I will see her again tomorrow”

_____

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canaryatlaw · 7 years

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Ugh I'm really bad at going to bed when I want to lol. Today was pretty good. I dragged my ass out of bed at 8:30 and got ready to go to the beach. I don't really have a bathing suit (I have one but idk if it fits and I didn't bring it with me anyway) so I just wore a bra and underwear with a tank top and shorts and faked it because whatever. We left for the beach around 9 and made fairly good time, getting there around 9:50. Parking was already swamped, and we had to drive around for a few minutes but soon found a spot on the street and discovered that you can pay for the meter by phone if you don't have enough quarters (interesting). So from there we walked over to the public access point, not very far. We were right over by where we used to always stay when we would come down here to visit my cousins. Where they actually live is kind of out in the middle of nowhere, and the only thing nearby is a motel, and my parents don't really do motels if at all avoidable (spoiled rich people that they are) so we always opted for one of the touristy hotels on the beach, because hey, beach! I was just happy to be back at the ocean. I dutifully put sunscreen on, then laid back for a little while before deciding to go in the water. At first I was being hesitant and not wanting to go all the way in but then I saw the waves and thought about how some of my happiest memories from my childhood are at the beach jumping waves with my (other) cousin and my brother because nobody was making fun of me and I was simply accepted as part of the group, and I just said fuck it and ended up jumping through waves and dunking my head under for a good while with my cousin, and it was very much fun. I got to talk to my cousin a bit while we were out there about college and such and how to prepare and just practical advice and shit, so that was good. Eventually we went back, and I guess my mortal mistake was not reapplying sunscreen at this point, because I ended up with stupid ridiculous sunburn on my arms and legs and I'm very irritated about it. But anyway. We sat with my mom and aunts for a while, then the adults (or adult adults) went for a walk and I just sat with my cousin, and looked at the ocean and just ended up thinking. And I sat there and I thought about how much I missed the ocean, the real ocean, and how much I've enjoyed these days with my extended family, feeling that sense of love and community that seems so lacking in so many of my lonely days in Chicago. I thought about my grandparents and how I didn't get enough time with them, and how I never got to know my grandpa on my mom's side very well because he lived in Arizona and we only ever saw him for a few days a year. I thought about how my dad is already in his 70's, and while he's in good health he's still getting older and it's obviously going to still be a few years before I have any kids. I thought about how I want my kids to know their grandparents, to spend time with them while they can and build those relationships while they have the chance to, before they're taken from them too soon. I thought about how my cousins all lived in different states, and how I'd like my kids to be very close with their cousins, that they'd grow up alongside them, that my kids would know their uncles and aunt and feel so loved by all the family around them. And I just sat looking at the ocean and I decided I don't want to stay in Chicago after I finish law school. I don't really know where this decision came from. Sure, there's all the above, but up until now all of that was true and staying in Chi was still a rational decision to make. But now....I just don't want to anymore. Maybe it has to do with the job in New York City that I want so badly, that while I love the work I do now that is what I really want to do, what I want to do long term. How I'd be close enough to my family but not so close that I'd feel the need to get away that sent me packing in the first place. I need breathing room. I'm not moving back home. But I wouldn't be opposed to being closer, a lot closer than Chicago. I don't know if this job in NYC is what God does have in store for me, but I know I really want it. I guess we'll have to see what happens. I will really really miss my church in Chicago though. I love it there oh so much and I can only hope to find a community that resonates with my soul so much again in a new place. I love the people there and their beautiful hearts, and I will miss them dearly. But, anyways. We stayed at the beach until about 2 when we wanted to head back since we didn't want to spend the whole day there. We stopped at one of the little beach stores because my aunt (the one from Michigan) wanted to look at stuff. I wound up getting two pairs of shorts, like soffee style, because the shorts I was wearing yesterday were way too big for me as are the majority of my shorts now haha so I'll be needing to do something about that. I'm not really crazy about this aunt. She's technically my step-aunt I suppose, as she's not the mother of my cousins, though my uncle divorced her before I have any memories of them. I remember vaguely before they got married, and I remember it happening and gaining two new cousins (or step-cousins technically, but we've dropped that mostly). Growing up I thought I didn't like her because my cousins didn't like her and I liked them, but as I got older and those cousins haven't really been around, I've realized that she's really just a rude person and is always very demeaning towards younger people and it definitely just pissed me off as a kid (and sometimes still pisses me off). But anyway, not the point. We got back in the car and briefly stopped for coffee, then drove back to the house. I showered to get the sand off me and get the salt water out of my hair, then tried to aloe up the best I could. Everyone was kind of chilling at this point so I pulled out my laptop, only to find the mouse pad being erratic and not responding correctly, so I cursed and shut it off, hoping it being off for a few hours will fix the issue and it'll work for me to live tweet the Tonys tonight. Shortly after this we started playing badminton out front, and the neighbors came over, so I sat and talked with the mom for a bit. This is the mom of the girl I was talking to last night, and I very much enjoyed talking to her as well. We eventually moved to the back for some reason, then started playing bs, and today apparently was not my day for it because I didn't win either of our games lol. The second was interrupted by dinner, which we had steak for, then we finished and it was like 7:40 at this point so I checked my computer which was thankfully cooperating at this point and waited for the Tonys to start. I knew this year would be a bit odd because I admittedly have not been paying attention to the theatre season at all, and I've only seen one show that was barely nominated, so I wasn't really familiar with any of the front runners. I knew the concept of DEH and had seen Ben Platt perform on one of the tonight shows, but that was about it. I had mixed feelings overall about the night. Kevin Spacey was funny enough. I really enjoyed the Falsettos performance, so I'm very glad that was apparently recorded and I can see it in movie theatres since it closed way back in November (I don't know why, it looks hilarious). I wasn't impressed at all by hello dolly or Groundhog Day, I thought they were both very boring and I didn't quite know how they got nominated. War Paint I felt like should've been more impressive for the star power it had, but the music just wasn't very good. The DEH performance was of course great, it was a strong choice of course to pick a song that really only features your main actor and not an ensemble piece like most shows do, but Ben Platt did a fantastic job of carrying it and I was totally obsessed with the set design, holy crap it was awesome. I have tentative plans at least to see that show before the summer is over, assuming we can get tickets. I was sad Anastasia didn't win for featured actress or costumes, I can't speak for the costumes for other shows but Anastasia's were BEAUTIFUL, some of the best I've ever seen, and undoubtedly deserved a Tony for it. And Mary Beth Peil was did an amazing job in her role and I wish she got recognized for it. It also pissed me off it didn't get nominated for best musical when fucking Groundhog Day did which looked fucking terrible???? Like why??? Why is that a thing and why did it get nominated for best musical???? I have so many frustrations. Ugh. And Christy Altomare belonged in the leading actress race and Ramin Karimloo belonged in the featured actor race, but I digress. Great Comet had a fun performance, I enjoyed their costumes as well (mostly how it went from 1800s to punk rock in about two seconds) although I'm still not entirely sure what the show is actually about, or how it was conceived (something about war and peace)??? I liked what they did with having the playwrights talk about their plays, it was super effective in getting invested in them and better than how they used to do it. I also appreciated how they introduced them with the writers name first for the revivals. DEH winning of course surprised nobody, though it'll probably make ticket prices go up (sigh, as if they weren't high enough already). But yeah, it was decent, a good watch at least. And that pretty much summed up my night, just followed by an inability to get off my phone, though my phone has picked up the annoying habit of dying on me when the battery isn't dead but won't turn back on unless plugged in??? Ugh, not happy about it, but have a Genius Bar appointment for it Tuesday. Flying home tomorrow, but more on that then. Sleep for now. Goodnight peeps. Stay lovely.

#daily journal #June 2017

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