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#gotta cover all the bases
defectivevillain · 5 months
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this winding labyrinth
chapter 1: suffocation.
pairing: Hannibal Lecter/Reader (reader is not gendered, race-ambiguous, and no physical descriptors are used)
summary:
You wish you never met Hannibal Lecter. But you yearn for his presence. You want to forget him. But he never truly leaves your thoughts. Now, you’re left to pick up the pieces of a broken design. A battle of instinct rages on in your mind—one of bittersweet relief and cloying grief, fearless resolve and poignant regret; a clashing between affection and antipathy, pride and pain. What will win, in the end? Only time will tell.
this is act 2 of this broken design. if you haven't read that, this won't make too much sense.
ao3 version | Spotify playlist
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warnings: canon-typical blood, violence, gore, mutilation, death, & animal death. the animal death is pretty detailed, so please don't read this fic if you're triggered by that kind of topic.
author's notes: This first chapter is a little bit of a mess imo, but I wanted to post it to assure you all that I don’t want to abandon this fic. It may take me longer to post and update chapters, especially since I graduated from uni (mwahahah) and my schedule may get busy. Still, I really enjoy writing this story—and you all seem to enjoy reading it. Both of those things are enough to keep me going.
Something extremely ironic happened around the time I was writing the last few chapters of Act 1. So… if you remember, in Chapter 6, Hannibal and the reader go on an opera date (of sorts). During that date, the reader remarks that they “don’t know the first thing about opera.” Those words were pretty much taken directly from my mouth. Fast forward to about mid-fall, I get a call for an interview for an internship. I end up doing the first interview, then a second interview… Then I get the internship. The irony? This internship is at an opera house. (What’s even more ironic is that I’m now getting to the point where I do actually know things about opera—I know different productions and directors and technical terms… It’s absolutely crazy. The universe is making me eat my words, lol.
To make matters even stranger, I was in the office for the internship one day and caught a glimpse of a television, which broadcasts what’s happening on the stage. Imagine my absolute surprise and fear when I look up at the television screen with absolutely no expectations and see a single man in a beige jumpsuit with something over his face standing on stage, his shadow silhouetted against the wall behind him. Imagine my surprise when I see that, not only is he standing in an enclosure with iron bars (just like the ones at Baltimore State Hospital for the Criminally Insane), but it also looks as if he is staring right at me—and he looks exactly like Hannibal Lecter in captivity. It was simultaneously scary as hell and weirdly reassuring. Anyway, I’ve taken these experiences as cosmic confirmation that I should continue writing this fic. Lol.
Anyway. Back to the important things… I’m planning to borrow elements from both Silence of the Lambs and Red Dragon, but, similarly to the first act, there will be canon divergence and canon non-compliance. Also, as you probably discerned in the past act, there is some plot armor. But, this is fiction.
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Your life currently takes two forms: before the Chesapeake Ripper… and after. 
Before the Ripper, the leaf-stained pavement of the Bureau filled you with hope. Walking through the agency’s halls was a testament to the hard work that brought you there. Each assignment was an invaluable opportunity to further develop your interrogation and combat skills. You went to classes, completed assignments, trained, slept, and repeated the cycle the next day. Over and over and over again. But you were happy. 
Life doesn’t feel so simple anymore. You feel like you’ve been fading for a while now, slowly deteriorating as you invest more and more energy into catching criminals. Your work has morphed into an exhausting mutual exchange, one in which you take murderers’ freedom and they take your restful nights. You can’t remember the last time you rested unencumbered by the horrors you’ve seen in the field.
By some miracle, Jack manages to keep the press relatively uninformed about the happenings behind the Ripper case. Everyone is too absorbed with the fact that Hannibal’s in captivity to remember to ask just how he got there, and you’re very grateful for that lapse in memory. You can just imagine the interactions you’d have with paparazzi. Is it true that he stabbed you? Is it true that he purposefully left you alive, only to surrender in your front yard and torment you with the constant knowledge that he will remain in the same place, lying in wait until the moment you will inevitably need him? You shudder. 
Even with all the chaos that comes from the Ripper case—the media coverage of Hannibal and the attention the FBI gets—life goes on. Back at the Bureau, you occasionally lecture the new recruits and you take on assignments along with the rest of the Behavioral Analysis Unit. Jack is still wont to call on you at the most ungodly of hours; Beverly still trades lighthearted taunts with you; Brian Zeller still seems to hate your guts, for reasons you’re not quite sure of; Alana and you are back to a steady friendship, albeit with occasional beats of unexplained tension and awkward silence. 
Criminality continues to occur in the Ripper’s wake. You’re not surprised: the imprisonment of one criminal doesn’t beget the imprisonment of another. Even so, it’s difficult for you to proceed as if things are normal. You see traces of Hannibal in each of the monsters you apprehend. Your emotions are starting to eat you alive from the inside. You don’t have a therapist to assist you with those emotions anymore. And, while you think therapy would be helpful, you also know that there’s no way in hell you’d be able to actually be honest with a therapist without being imprisoned yourself. The things you’ve done and the urges you’ve felt…  Neither is even close to a semblance of normality. 
You take a deep breath. You have no issue stopping other criminals, sending them to empty white walls and thin mattresses. Why was Hannibal Lecter any different? You suppose you shouldn’t fool yourself—you know the answer to that question already: you got to know him. Beyond the mask of the Ripper, beyond the bloodied skin and cruel smile… You started to see him as a man, perhaps even a friend. Perhaps, even-
You tear yourself away from that thought process before it gets too far along. The semantics don’t matter now. All that matters is that you’re back in the field, back popping pills for your headaches and blinking fresh horrors from your eyes. All that matters is that the memory of Hannibal Lecter begins to fade away in the face of work— so much so that keeping busy helps you forget the pain. 
Meanwhile, a hundred miles away, a veterinarian walks into a stable under a farmer’s guidance. The two stand over a dead horse and the veterinarian frowns. The farmer explains the horse’s death before stepping aside, letting the professional work. 
The farmer quickly becomes lost in their thoughts. They hadn’t expected the horse to die in the middle of her pregnancy. The farmer swallows past the tightness in their throat and tears their eyes away from the horse. They were looking forward to the birth of the foal, looking forward to helping the mother raise her offspring. The stable air suddenly feels suffocating and they take a look at the veterinarian’s turned back before stepping outside to get some fresh air. 
Moments later, the veterinarian rejoins them. The doctor’s lips are drawn in a tight line and there’s a troubled expression on their face. The farmer feels any remaining composure promptly seep out of them, as the veterinarian suggests they come back into the stable. 
“It feels like there’s something here,” the veterinarian says, their expression conflicted. They touch the horse’s womb with a gloved hand and frown. 
“She was pregnant,” the farmer chokes out, their throat feeling tight again. It hurts to utter the words aloud.
“With twins?” The veterinarian asks, turning around to look at them. 
“No, just one baby,” the farmer shakes their head. Why would they ask about twins? Surely, they don’t feel another baby in the womb. The thought of two deaths is morbid and distressing enough, but three? The farmer inhales shakily. 
“There’s… something else here.” The veterinarian remarks, their face contorting as they feel the horse’s womb once more. They turn back to look at the farmer for assistance. The farmer feels a horrible, inexplicable sense of foreboding crawling up their skin. Despite that feeling, they nod to the veterinarian. The doctor nods in response and turns to the horse’s womb, before making an incision.
The veterinarian unearths the dead foal and places it on the nearby hay with infinite gentleness. The farmer’s chest begins to hurt as they come to terms with the sight before them. Their pain doesn’t end there, however. The veterinarian continues slicing along the skin before stopping and glancing back at them inexplicably. It’s as if they’re waiting for permission to continue. The farmer appreciates the gesture and they nod in affirmation. This mystery needs to be put to rest. 
The veterinarian inhales sharply, sending the farmer’s heart racing. The farmer prompts them to step aside, revealing the horse’s womb. There’s… something there. The farmer squints at it, a gasp ripping its way from their lips as they realize just what they’re looking at. A human corpse lies on the stable floor, a stark shock of muted crimson against the golden strands of hay. The farmer brings a shaking hand to their pocket and calls the police. 
Unaware of these occurrences, you slowly exhale and pinch the bridge of your nose, feeling a headache coming on. You busy yourself with grading your students’ papers, and you don’t learn of the corpse until a few hours later, when the medicine begins to kick in and you’re foolishly convinced that you’ll be fine. Before you can leave for the day, Jack is walking up to you and beckoning you to the lab. The two of you grab Beverly along the way, which leaves the three of you to enter the laboratory that Price and Zeller are currently situated in. When you walk in, you’re immediately assaulted with the scent of formaldehyde. Price explains the situation behind the corpse, how a veterinarian found the body within the womb of a horse. The notion is strikingly similar to the other deaths by suffocation that have been eluding the BAU for several weeks. Jack seems to think the same thing, as he rattles off what he knows so far about the killer. You add things here and there—small things you can notice from the state of the corpse itself—before Price gets the group back on track. 
“I called you here because…” Price trails off, frowning before readjusting his stethoscope and placing it on the victim’s chest once more. The room is deathly silent as he concentrates. “...There’s a heartbeat.”
“That doesn’t come with the onset of rigor mortis—we all know that,” Zeller continues, looking down at the corpse with a somewhat puzzled expression. He seems to sense you staring and looks up, his eyebrows furrowing as his gaze meets yours. “She’s dead.” He announces with complete certainty. 
“She was found in the womb of the horse?” Beverly asks. Everyone else nods and she pauses for a moment. “Make an incision and check the chest cavity.” There’s an unshakeable certainty in her voice and it throws you off for a moment, before you realize what she’s getting at. It’s not unfathomable that something was buried within the victim’s chest cavity. Suffocation seems to be a common theme with this killer. Did they put some sort of dead animal in the corpse? The thought makes your stomach turn. 
“Alright,” Price acquiesces, after glancing at Jack for approval. Crawford nods, evidently attributing value to Beverly’s suggestion. The four of you—Crawford, Beverly, Zeller, and you—watch as Price leans in and makes a careful incision in the chest. For several moments, there’s nothing but a tense silence in the air as Jimmy works. The quiet is broken a few seconds later when Price takes a sharp breath. “I saw something.” 
“Keep going,” Jack demands, bringing Jimmy’s attention back to the task at hand. Price nods and makes the incision a little bigger. All of you are watching in anticipation, waiting for something you’re not quite sure will appear. 
All of a sudden, there’s a flash of motion. A yellow blur flits about the cavity, before reaching upwards and extending its wings to fly out. You watch in disbelief as the bloodstained bird stretches its wings and flies about the lab, colliding with the sheen of the fluorescent lighting and sending shadows flickering along the floor.
Jack is the first one to respond. He quickly paces over to the small window located near the ceiling and opens it, allowing the bird an escape. For a few moments, the bird doesn’t seem to notice: it’s too overwhelmed with the sudden change in environment to comprehend that it has just been granted an escape. It has a chance at true freedom, but it’s too busy taking in the laboratory’s flimsy promises to notice. The bird eventually notices the open window and flies out of it, before Jack closes the laboratory off from the outside world once more. 
The group begins discussing what just occurred, but your mind is elsewhere. You feel a strange sort of kinship with the bird: suffocated beneath rows of ribs and walls of tissue and skin; banished to the space between; too taken with the small allowances to notice freedom within reach. You pinch the bridge of your nose. Your headache is returning, as pressure builds up in your temples and constricts your very skin. It’s significantly harder to breathe. Every time you blink, you’re greeted with the memory of that bright yellow bird bursting from its confines, greeting the stale laboratory air with beating wings. You step outside the lab to get some fresh air, trading your smaller prison for a bigger one—just as the bird did mere moments ago. 
It doesn’t take long for Jack to find you. After all, you’re not hidden—you’re simply leaning against the wall in the hallway that leads to the laboratory. Jack strides up to you, his hands in his pockets and that familiar tight line drawn across his face. You suspect he’ll get wrinkles a lot sooner than everyone else his age—sheerly because of all the responsibility he holds and the pressure he’s forced to perform under. It must be exhausting to be the one calling the shots in these horrible situations. You had always assumed Jack had the easy job, but looking at him now, you think that assumption must be incorrect. He is suffering, just as you are. Perhaps… Jack has just grown better at hiding it. 
The thought makes Jack’s remark slip in one ear and right out the other. You ask him to repeat himself and he sighs. “We need to go to the stable where the corpse was found. There are several police officers there already, but…” But we need to do a more thorough investigation , he doesn’t say. You hear him anyway and nod. Jack walks past you and paces purposefully down the hall, not even bothering to look and see if you’re following him. Perhaps he already knows you will follow him. 
What follows is an awkward car ride. Neither of the two of you attempt to break the tense silence, leaving a suffocating air of uncertainty and indecision. You don’t know what to say to Jack, so you instead busy yourself with looking out the window. You resolutely pretend not to notice your boss’s gaze repeatedly flitting over to you and, after a painful amount of time, Jack is driving up the gravel path that leads to a modest farmhouse and a beautiful wooden stable. 
The place is already crawling with police officers and FBI agents. Unfortunately, the police were the first ones to be informed of the case, which means the FBI is forced to share jurisdiction with them. You know Jack isn’t too happy about that, especially once you see the frown on his face as he watches the police officers clumsily investigate. They don’t have the right training for a situation like this and Jack is delighted to inform them of that fact—albeit with much more sugar coated wording than you would have utilized. A few minutes later, the cops are gone, leaving Jack, you, and the set of agents that Jack requested to follow after your car on the drive over. The other agents are quick to secure the crime scene, while Jack and you decide to explore the premises a little first. 
The property features a small, rather unremarkable house with slightly dirty bricks and a well-loved bench swing on the porch. The front door is agape, revealing hardwood flooring and items strewn about. Jack and you exchange a glance before walking into the home. You don’t see any sign of life until you reach the kitchen and come across an older woman sitting at the table, stirring a cup of tea. You’re quick to show your badge and explain the situation to her. She doesn’t seem to have a great idea of what’s going on, so you eventually decide to leave her be and keep looking about the property. 
Next to the house is a rather large stable, complete with several different stalls and a wide variety of tools. You have no idea what half of the tools could possibly be used for, but the majority of them look as if they’ve been used at least once. There are bales of hay in the corner of the room and various accessories hanging near the post of each horse’s stall. There are only a few horses in the stable—you think you could’ve seen a few in the pastures out back earlier. There’s a horrible stench pervading the air, and it’s not the typical odor that comes from a farm. It’s the smell of death. You look at Jack and he nods, inclining his head and gesturing for you to continue exploring the stable. It isn’t until you reach the last stall—one that is inexplicably larger than the rest—that you find the source of the stench. The rotted corpse of the horse rests at the back of the stall, the womb flayed open. The organs have been removed, but the smell of decay remains. Surprisingly enough, you’re not alone in this stall. A brown-haired man sits cross-legged on the floor next to the horse, a blank expression on his face. 
“...Hello?” You decide to try. There’s no response. “Excuse me?” Still no response. 
You glance at Jack and he raises his eyebrows, before turning to the stranger. “You must be Peter Bernardone,” Jack remarks. The mention of the man’s name seems to be enough to get his attention. On second thought, you remember Jack offhandedly mentioning that there may be a stablehand on site. It seems you’ve found him. 
“That’s me,” the man replies flatly, staring ahead with glassy eyes. He looks as if he’s on an entirely different plane of existence, as he looks at the wall ahead of him with enough intensity to melt it.
“Jack Crawford, FBI,” Jack answers with an introduction of his own. He flashes his badge for a moment before putting it away. You can’t tell if Peter is even paying attention, but you do the same to make him more comfortable. “We’re just here to ask you some questions.”
“I want to talk,” Peter murmurs quietly, just barely loud enough to be heard. He pulls his knees up to his chest; his eyes haven’t strayed from the corpse of the animal in front of him. You feel your chest constrict a little at the sight. 
“Good,” Jack responds with a nod. 
“...To you,” Peter finishes with a gesture. To your complete surprise, he doesn’t point at Jack—he’s pointing at you. Jack blinks in equal surprise, looking at you for answers. You send him a helpless look. At first, you’re not sure why you seem more trustworthy than Jack. Then you remember Jack’s position and the intimidating aura he tends to give off. You think you’d want to talk to someone like yourself too, were you in Peter’s situation. 
“Alright,” you agree. You don’t see the harm in having a conversation. You need information and, more importantly, answers. Jack stares at you for a long few seconds, before exhaling in evident exasperation. 
“I’ll be outside,” Jack promises, before walking away. You wait until Jack is out of sight before you take a step closer to Peter, placing your hands in your pockets. 
“What do you do here, Peter?” You hear yourself ask. Your voice sounds foreign to your ears. 
“I volunteer here,” Peter responds, still facing the corpse. His voice sounds hollow, empty. “Sometimes.” 
“Did you… know this horse?” You ask hesitantly, looking down at the corpse.
“Yes,” Peter answers without hesitation. There’s a hint of emotion in his voice now.  
“Ridden her before?”
“I don’t ride the horses,” Peter replies, “I just like to brush them.” 
“Okay,” you acknowledge. You begin pacing around the stall in an attempt to calm your restless nerves. “Peter, were you here on the day that the veterinarian visited?” Jack had briefed you on the circumstances of the horse’s death, how a veterinarian had been called to investigate before the corpse was found in the womb. 
“I don’t remember a veterinarian,” he stares ahead with a frown. 
“That’s fine,” you answer. He may not have been there that day. “The veterinarian was the one who cut open the womb and found the corpse… Did you know this horse was pregnant?”
At that question, Peter turns around and stares at you. His hollow gaze is enough to send a shiver down your spine. For a moment, he just stares at you, before huffing in amusement. “Obviously.” 
“Obviously,” you echo. You suppose that was a rather dumb question on your part. “Were you… sad about the foal?”
“Of course,” Peter huffs again. “Why do you think I’m sitting here?” This discussion isn’t getting you very far. 
“Fine,” you acquiesce. You take a deep breath. “This doesn’t seem to be getting anywhere. I’m going to give you my extension, and if you ever feel like talking about what happened, you can call me, okay?” Thankfully, you know for certain that Peter isn’t the killer—the psychological profile you built on this murderer tells you that much. Jack clearly doesn’t think Peter is the killer either, and those two facts are enough for you to rule him out as a suspect. However, you’re still contemplating the possibility of him tampering with the crime scene. 
Peter clears his throat pointedly and you remember what you were supposed to be doing. You grab a notepad from your jacket pocket and quickly scrawl down the Behavioral Analysis Unit’s phone number, followed by the extension to your office phone. You take a step closer and hold it out to Peter. For a fraction of a moment, you think he won’t take it. Just before you can pull your hand back, he takes the paper and slips it into his pocket. 
You turn on your heel and take a step towards the door of the stall, fully intent on leaving, when the door falls open of its own accord. Jack Crawford stands in the doorway, staring at you. 
“Good, Agent,” Jack remarks. This must be important. “We have a lead,” he says vaguely, his eyes falling to Peter. You can’t discuss confidential information here—the details will have to wait until you’re both in the car.
“Excellent,” you remark in relief. “I’ll meet you at the car?” You can sense that Peter’s attention is piqued. Maybe you can still get something out of him. Jack nods and walks away once more. You then turn to Peter, who has turned his body away from the horse to face you. Somehow, he’s intrigued now. Something has caught his eye. “Sorry, Peter,” you apologize, taking a step backwards and emphasizing that you’re a moment away from leaving, “I have to go.”
“What is it?” Peter asks, “Did you find him?”
“It’s classified, I’m sorry,” you respond, ignoring the inexplicable sound of alarm bells blaring in your head. Peter isn’t the killer. “But we’re tracking down this killer. I promise he’ll be put away.”
“You promise?” Peter asks, a dangerous conviction in his eyes. 
“Yes,” you respond without hesitation. You don’t have the authority to make that kind of promise, but you do anyway. The sincerity in your expression must convince Peter, because he takes a slow breath and the tension seems to fade from his form. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, Peter. It was nice to meet you.” Peter says the same and you turn to leave the stable. 
“Price and Zeller found soil in the corpse’s throat,” Jack recounts to you as he drives along the highway, moving at a comfortable speed. His eyes are fixed on the road, but he recalls his conversation with Price with perfect consistency. “We traced it to a burial site about thirty minutes from here.”
“Great,” you remark, relief coursing through you. To your surprise, Jack doesn’t respond. Instead, he simply nods ever so slightly and continues staring ahead. Now, it seems as if he’s avoiding something. “What is it?” You ask. Something seems off about him. 
“You may want to brace yourself,” Jack warns vaguely. 
“Why?” You hear yourself question. Jack doesn’t answer, and he’s quiet for the rest of the car ride. When the two of you pull up to the supposed burial site, you’re filled with trepidation. This job always comes with the knowledge that blood and gore could be waiting at every corner. That’s the normal day for an agent. So… why does Jack feel the need to warn you? You grapple with the prospect as the two of you leave the car and join the group of agents circled around something. 
It isn’t until you get closer that you recognize the familiar stench of rotting death. Sure enough, the group of agents is clustered around a hole in the ground—one that houses a woman’s corpse. You stare at the marks around her neck, the dirt caked under her nails and staining her fingertips. She was on the brink of death when she was buried. She was trying to escape. You stare down at the body for another moment, searching for any more abnormalities, before taking a step back to let the other agents resume their investigation. You exchange glances with Jack. 
“She’s not the only one,” Jack says. You stare at the field around you—the grassy, open expanse. It seems to stretch on for miles now. You feel your heart steadily thudding in your chest, at a rate slightly faster than normal. Your head begins to ache. 
“How many of them are there?” You murmur. The question is quiet, as you practically whisper it against the wind. For a moment, you think Jack doesn’t hear it. You then realize that he has comprehended it, but is simply declining to answer. Indeed, your boss stares out at the field with a conflicted expression. “Jack?”
“Sixteen,” Jack responds, turning his attention back to you. You feel something in your stomach twist and pull. 
“That can’t be right,” you remark. It sounds as if the wind is picking up. It takes you several seconds to realize the sound is being conjured by your own mind, and that the air is damp and still around you. You swallow hard and take another look around at the field, suddenly understanding why the agents are now evenly dispersed across the space. They all have shovels and each sound of metal hitting dirt is enough to send a bolt of pain down your temple and through your cheekbones. Your teeth hurt as you watch the unearthing of sixteen different victims. They’re uniformly dispersed across the field. This is no happy accident—the killer meticulously planned for their graves to be close (but not too close). The thought brings a burning feeling to your throat and you feel your knees suddenly buckle. You place a hand on the ground, feeling the familiar horrible feeling of nausea climbing past your throat until you’re vomiting on the killer’s ground. It takes you a few minutes to stop, and even longer for you to fully recover. Your eyes sting and you can’t tell if you’re going to cry or pass out. There’s an overwhelming clarity in your vision and a rhythmic pounding at your temple.
This graveyard is a gruesome display, even to someone who has spent their entire career surrounded by carnage. You’ve seen your fair share of murder victims. You’ve never seen sixteen of them lined up in two neat rows of eight, buried in a nondescript field under layers of muddy soil. Moreover, you can sense the killer’s feelings—and it makes you sick. This was not a gesture born out of respect for the victims. The murderer did not dig up these graves to give these women a final resting place; he buried them to trap them, so that even in death, they would never truly be free. Their existences would be tied to him forever. They would never be allowed to breathe again. It’s nothing short of sickening. There’s nausea stewing in your stomach again, revulsion prickling across your skin, and sweat trickling down your neck.
You can’t seem to push yourself up to your feet. You’re grounded to the damp soil, to the wrong side of the earth. What deems you worthy of living? What deemed these women worthy of dying? Your hands are twitching at your sides. A deep breath causes your chest to hitch and you nearly vomit again. You look down on your body as you claw at the grass and tear it up, shakily pulling at the dirt and plants and grass and rot and death and injustice and horrible, terrible guilt and indescribable anger and vengeance -
There’s a hand on your shoulder. You instinctually tense, your movements beginning to slow. It feels as if you’re suddenly catapulted back into your body, forced to inhabit the itchy, dirt-stained skin and the endless remorse that wants to eat you alive from the inside. 
“They’re dead; there is nothing left for them here,” Jack says. It’s his strange way of comforting you. It sort of works. After a moment, he takes a step forward and extends a hand to you. You take it, allowing him to pull you up. Jack seems to be fighting against the urge to say or do something, because his eyebrows are furrowed and his lips are pulled taut in a thin line. There’s dirt all over you, yet you are still privileged with life. 
You don’t remember how you get back to the Bureau. All you remember is staring blankly ahead as you’re half-led through the halls by Jack himself, his hand on your shoulder providing equal support and increased pressure. All you remember is the worry on Alana’s face as you walk past, the way she gets up from her desk and walks over to you, how she leads you towards the far restroom with a gentle hand. It ends up being the same restroom where Zeller accused you of killing Franklyn. The memory of that encounter is far fresher than you want it to be. 
Alana leads you to a sink and guides your hands towards the water. 
“Allow me,” she remarks, turning on the sink. She steps away for a moment and you stare at the water dripping from the faucet. Alana returns moments later with a washcloth. She pumps some soap on your hands and helps you wash them clean. Your head aches. You don’t know what to think, what to say. All you can think about is the graveyard. It haunts your vision every time you blink, forcing you to think of suffocating under piles of dirt and debris. You inhale sharply, gasping. Regaining your breath is a chore. “I’m worried about you,” Alana soon admits. You hate that her concern makes you feel appreciated. Your relationship with Alana ended years ago. You don’t want to be hers again, but this very moment reminds you of the intimacy you no longer get to see.
“You shouldn’t be,” you remark. Alana laughs under her breath. You both know that’s not how it works. Emotions don’t bend to logic. 
“What did you see?” Her hand on your forearm keeps you tethered to reality. You shake your head, unable to begin describing the scene that will most certainly haunt your nightmares. The two of you are silent for the remainder of your time together under the flickering fluorescent lights, as you try to come to terms with the terrible regret, revulsion, and rage threatening to spill over your frame and inhabit your every waking moment.
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next chapter
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endnotes: thanks for reading! i'm very excited to continue this story, mwahhahahha
here's a lil sneak peek for the next chapter: “Peter,” Clark practically coos. You hate him, more than you’ve ever hated anyone before. He is a bundle of contradictions: a fine-dressed man with a fine-dressed smile and fine-dressed lies and cruelty and violence and- “Why don’t you tell me what happened?”
hannibal taglist <3: @its-ares @tobbotobbs @xrisdoesntexist @gr1mmac3 @tiredstarcerberuslamb @yourlocalratwriter @kahuunknown @atlas-king1 @pendragon-writes @slipknotcentury @cryinersaved @the-ultimate-librarian @starre-eyes @pendragon-writes @peterparkeeperer @gayschlatt69
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gregoftom · 2 years
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you’re girlypop!!
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quackle · 4 months
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my drafts and i are sooooo ready for the new year 😇
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potato-lord-but-not · 3 months
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ok yall I’m tempted to make like a comprehensive How To drawing tutorial sometime, but I gotta know which part y’all want some info on the most. Just so I can know which aspects to go into more detail on.
Also this is gonna be focused on a stylized art style so if you want to know how to uh realistically draw any of these you’re out of luck lmao.
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suunkiised · 3 months
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watching Manly's playthrough of Poppy Chapter 3 rn.
Current thoughts:
I like the intro sequence where Catnap is dragging the player and drops them in a trash compactor, nice to see that the team is going for starting the chapters different from one another
the environments are jam-packed with a lot of gameplay already, a little overwhelming but not bad
don't trust Ollie, kid's kinda suspicious :/
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asciuto · 5 months
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Elementary (Taylor's Version) // I believe that we were supposed to find this
honorable mention:
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so-very-small · 7 months
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a person who shrunk down to three inches tall roughly five months ago: *finally accepts that they will never grow back and return to a normal life, and are doomed to an overwhelming existence of survival in a world no longer meant for them*
somewhere, in the distance, Rod Sterling looks at the fourth wall: Man that shit was fucked up. Anyways. Tune in next week for more fucked up shit.
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doctormori · 17 days
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Posting some more of my nasty man for 4/13.
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witheredbouquet · 3 months
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why did he do that....
(from the [TGS 2016] Persona 5 Seiyuu Talkshow)
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sea-buns · 5 months
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I keep remembering secrets from last night and when FCG confesses that killing things actually makes them feel better and relaxes them and Chetney just goes:
"Oh! That's fine, we can go hunting together :D"
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telffiin · 4 months
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words cannot describe how over i am the whole early days tim vs damian feud. i don't fucking care. I DON'T CARE!!! IT'S SO BORING!!! can we please move on. write something else. something more interesting maybe? something that doesn't cause tim to be woobified by fandom even more than he already is, perhaps? i mean. i really don't care about him as a charater, but come onnn!!! LET IT GO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD
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snailvibes · 9 days
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Hi chat please ignore me in these trying times while I’m fixating on a game series that’s been dead for 7 years ty🫶
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roetrolls · 26 days
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I'm starting to lose steam for right now so I thought I'd take a break and slap all of today's swaps on the same post, with sizes and stuff adjusted a lil :]]
THANK YOU GUYS AGAIN FOR SENDING ALL THE SUGGESTIONS, I'm having so much fun with these and I can't wait to do more QvQ
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ssspringroll · 17 days
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Real Estate 'Listings' Info
TL:DR Vacant apartments. They're a sim-making prompt. That sim will live in that apartment in my game. Only occults are invited. (See sim guidelines at least, if you read nothing else)
E.T. Moneybags presents an exciting new housing opportunity for all displaced or needy occults. Looking for a new start? Move on in to a lovely Newcrest apartment! A newly developed neighborhood for all of freak-kind to live in peace, amongst themselves or while learning to integrate with human society!
After crash-landing in the yard of the Landgraab mansion some 20-odd years ago, they took them under their wing, showing them the wonders and joys of capitalism! Delighted by this, among other earthly delights, E.T. has spent their time on Earth finding ways to introduce culture to everyone they can. With a little investment help from their old pals the Landgraabs, they've hit it big enough for their dreams to come true: a housing development just for people like them. Aliens, Vampires, Werewolves, and more!
What is this?
I'm starting a new 'starter save', a personal save file that I will clone each time I want to begin a brand new save game. This has every lot changed, every EA townie updated, and a few new townies added in. Some of these new townies are made by me, but the rest? That's where this project comes in! Real Estate 'Listings' are a (hopefully) fun idea I came up with to invite other simmers to make some sims for my new starter save.
How does it work?
I will post photos of a vacant* apartment. This is your prompt for making a sim! If the whole apartment is decked out in purple, maybe it's a sim that really likes purple? If there's a lot of books and bookshelves, maybe they're a writer? It's up to you how much personality you want to give them! Once the 'listing' photos go up, you can comment or reblog with a notice that you would like to claim that spot. After the spot has been claimed, I will turn off reblogs for 3 days, during which time you can make and submit your sim! (If you need more time, let me know, but if I don't hear from you for 3 days, the listing will go back on the 'market'). Once an apartment has been filled, the post will be edited and the reblogs will stay off.
You can check the open listings at ssspringroll.tumblr.com/tagged/for rent. All listings (open and closed) can be viewed at https://ssspringroll.tumblr.com/tagged/ETM Realty
If you'd rather just submit a sim and let me figure out the rest, you can! More info here: https://ssspringroll.tumblr.com/post/747775297474183168/renters-wanted
If a listing has reblogs disabled, then it's claimed (or occupied, check the original post to see!) You do not have to claim an apartment before submitting a sim, but I highly recommend it! If someone else claims the apartment they get dibs on it, even if you started your sim before they claimed it. But there's plenty of apartments to go around, so don't worry! You'll probably find another one that you like.
*It is possible that an apartment will already have a resident and will instead be looking for 1 or 2 roommates to move in.
To submit your sim:
You may make your own original post featuring your sim(s), or you can reblog the listing with your sim(s) if you find that easier, more organized, or whatever (if you claimed an apartment and reblogs are off, you'll have to comment to let me know I need to re-enable reblogs!). Make sure you @ssspringroll in your post so I don't miss it!!!
Your sim(s) do not have to be publicly downloadable if you do not wish for them to be, you may private message @exculis (my main) with the link if you prefer, or send a non-anonymous ask.
Sim creation rules/'guidelines':
You do not need to make a new sim for this, you are welcome to offload sim(s) from your gallery (that you made, or were born in-game) if you'd like
You do not need to write any kind of backstory, biography, or anything else about your sim(s). You can genuinely just post them with no commentary if that's all you feel like doing. Remember these are townies! I'm not asking for maximum effort. I'm asking for whatever you can scrounge up.
Sim(s) MUST be an occult of some sort, or intended to be an occult of sorts. If you do not have the pack associated with the occult you'd like to make, that's fine! Just specify what they are supposed to be in your post somewhere and I'll make sure they get turned into that occult when I place them in game
Aliens are preferred, but all in-game occults are acceptable (including plantsims!). That said, they do not need to follow game-lore. For example, I often make 'demons' that are actually vampires, or 'fairies' that are actually spellcasters. You can have fun with it! However, I will not install any mods that add in new occult types.
Hybrids are allowed and encouraged! I play with the occult hybrid stabilizer, and I love weird combos! If you aren't capable of making them a hybrid on your own, once again that's fine! Just specify what occult types they're supposed to be, and I'll get them set up as best I can in game.
Only one outfit (everyday) is required, it's up to you if you want to put any other outfits on them. I won't stop you. If their other outfits aren't done, they'll likely just get randomly generated ones from me (unless they end up a major character in one of my playthroughs, then they'll likely get a more personalized makeover)
You do not need to customize Alien Disguise form, vampire dark form, mermaid form, werewolf form, etc. You can if you would like to.
You aren't limited to just 1 sim per household. Many apartments have space to sleep multiple sims, you're welcome to make as many as you want. Human sims are permitted if they're family.
You aren't limited to 1 submission, but you can only have one outstanding claim at a time. If your claim runs out, you decide to give it up voluntarily, or you fulfill the claim by submitting a household, you are allowed to claim and submit again if you'd like.
Pets are permitted. Horses are not recommended. These are apartment buildings 😰
I have all the packs, and cc of any kind is permitted. I only ask that you please include the cc in the download when you share the sim
I won't install custom sliders. I have too many in my game as it is and your sim will probably look fine in my game without them
Disclaimers:
I do not write stories, this is not a 'submit your sim to be a character in my story'-type event. These sims will functionally be townies in my game that may interact with whomever I am playing at the time, and might not.
I will do my best to mention the original creators of the sims if/when they are featured in screenshots on this blog, but please understand I may forget. I will always direct people your way if they ask directly about a sim, though (if your username hasn't changed by then/I can still find you, of course)
I will not share your sims with anyone else. I will not share my starter save or any save files cloned from my starter save with anyone else.
I can and WILL change anything about your sim(s) that I want to. If you aren't okay with this, this isn't the event for you
Complex gender options are a-okay! I won't touch things like physical frame, pronouns, clothing preference, or other gender options. I do play with the LGBTQIA+ mod, though, with auto-assign settings that may assign them a gender identity or orientation different from what you intended.
None of the apartments or their buildings are available for download. If you really want one of them for some reason, shoot me a message I guess. You will not get any of its residents. See bullet 3.
This isn't a 'enter and you might get in' type game, this isn't a contest. If you send me a sim (unless there's some kind of game-breaking issue with them) then they will go in my game. Into an apartment. Until I run out of apartments, and then any further submissions will just be left to run around homeless.
I may add to or edit this post as the event goes on.
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rosie-kairi · 11 months
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I know I’m struggling to fit the role.
Isn’t there anything to make me whole?
And I can stomach it, or so I’m told.
But promise me you’ll hold me so I’ll live through the night.
- “Chronic Wasting Disease” by R.I.P
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retired-yowane · 9 months
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ATTENTION VOCALOID COMMUNITY
Yowane Haku needs your help. She has been turned into a low quality png image of a low poly model. To return Yowane to her original state you need to reply with your credit card number, expiration date and the little numbers on the the back. Hurry before it’s too late to save Yowane!!!!
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