#gifting it to all who need it today

[londonfoginacup]

.

#prefacing this in saying that this isn't directed at anyone reposting these from twit or reblogging them #I need to get this frustration out though #and maybe some other artists will feel seen with this #but like. #AI is a devaluation of everything fandom is built on and i am disgusted by it #the economy of fandom is based on creation made and gifted and created in return #everything AI makes is stolen from what other have created #their fan art or their fic or their manips or their photography #ALL of it is stolen #every bit of it #that has been taken from someone who has made something out of love #AI might create fun images #but ive seen so much ai 'fanart' on twitter today #and i can so CLEARLY name every artist that that 'fanart' has stolen from #its fucking sickening #and we dont have as many manip makers in our fandom right now but we have a rich history of it #and i feel sick thinking about how they will think its useless to even try now #when people can just ~make ai manips~ #BUT ITS NOT THE SAME #with fan art and manips i spend so much time zooming in and looking at details and expressions #knowing those have been created with a purpose #theyre made to be found and admired #ai 'art' has none of that #and im just #so mad #fuck ai fuck ai fuck ai im so MAD #it is a DEVALUATION OF FANDOM I AM SO MAD #not at the people using it as much #because i feel like they havent thought through that #although i hope they will

[hella1975]

i have such a reputation that four separate people incorporated pringles into my birthday gifts. be that girl

#to the point my one mate today (the one i almost ditched in that seminar LMAO) ((WAIT I NEED TO TELL YOUSE ABOUT HIM)) #anyway! he was like 'oh i actually got you something!' which given our dynamic despite RECENT DEVELOPMENTS AHEM #is so unusual like he was NOT required to get me a gift. but then i immediately was like 'it's pringles isn't it' #and he was just like 'sigh. yeah' LMFAOOOOO #and you know what? chuffed to utter bits. ive already eaten half of them in 24 hours. scranning even more as i type this #anyway back to that guy. so you know i sometimes mention my flatmate from first year who also happens to be on my course #so off the bat we've got a weird friendship bc he's not just a coursemate bc i also lived with him #but also first year halls were assigned not chosen so it's not like we were actually FRIENDS #especially bc my flat did NOTTT get on lmfao so me and him were mainly just. acquaintances who lived and studied together? #very strange foundation to have with someone. but we went all of second year barely staying in contact #and then this year we live in the same area and for the LIFE of me i cant remember how we got back in contact #but all of a sudden we were messaging every day and meeting up before lectures and sitting together in them and stuyding together etc #and we get on REALLY well like he has my exact sense of humour i know ive posted about him several times #over the past three years being like 'me and this guy are the funniest people i know' 'he would do bits on tumblr' etc #AND THE OTHER WEEK HE ADMITTED THAT HE LIKES ME AND WE WENT ON A DATE #AND IT WENT REALLY WELL BUT I CANNOT FOR THE LIFE OF ME FIGURE OUT HOW I FEEL ABOUT HIM #SO IM TRYING NOT TO PUT PRESSURE ON ANYTHING and i was super clear w him also that im not actively searching for anything #so if smthn happens organically then it happens but if not it's my final year and that will always take priority and he was super chill #so i dont feel like i HAVE to make a decision just yet but we're going out again tomorrow #and it's like. even if it doesnt become smthn romantic i just really click with him?? like we get on so well??? IT'S SO FUN #AND THAT'S WHAT MATTERS! WOOHOO! pringles post derailed by a MAN. awful #hella goes to uni

[lupismaris]

My therapists keep telling me to stop othering myself and I'm trying but it's really fuckin hard when I'm being othered

#i get im spending a lot of time with fellow audhd and on the spectrum queers i do and i get that means compassion and empathy #is potentially going to be lacking in some ways because they are learned behaviors that do not come naturally or at all #but for all the effort i put in to getting over the sense of being 'othered' and 'the outsider' some of them do a damn good job #just nerfing the work ive done with a lot of carelessness #if you're doing a group pool of money for a gift and i offer you cash dont single me out!! as the only one!! who doesn't need to pay!! #because its cash not venmo. like regardless of the implications of it its fuckin humiliating to be singled out in a GROUP CHAT #no matter how nice you try to make it if you're ultimately saying you dont want my money #dont cut me off and cut me out at practice because you're insecure and dont want to take advice from someone who isnt a coach #don't cut me out because im one of the only people who likes and exhibits masculinity in a way you dislike. #like. how am i supposed to feel? other than humiliated and exhausted and pissed off when someone else's bullshit #is constantly overrunning everything else and everyone else #tbd im sick and i need to do my tshot and i dont want to go to practice today . this teammate sends off kill bill sirens i stg

[bunnyb34r]

Idk why I thought that working + going to the movies + going to the mall WOULDN'T completely wipe my ass out, but.... 🙃

#marquilla #i was feeling good after the movies and offered to take mom to build a bear which we've been planning since december (was supposed to be a #christmas gift but after Christmas) and i really wanted pochaco WHO I GOT :D he's a surgeon (was gonna just get him shorts and nothing else #bc that would be funny but then was gonna be hoodie and nothing else but we saw the scrubs and were like 👀) and i #got a mudkip!!! i was so pysched that they still had them 😭❤ i wanted to get pompurin too but i dont need THREE babs in one day #but i kept seeing pochaco on the bab reddit and was like oh i need... i need my boy 🥺 #i haven't named him yet sgdgdggd or the mudkip #i spent like a gazillion dollars bc i bought mom's cow for her and a little hat for it and she was like oh my goddd that's too much money😳 #and kept having to be like listen i bought two branded ones and an outfit thats the bulk of the money right there #and i wouldnt have suggested it/have offered paying for all of it (instead of going Dutch) if i didnt have the money and i got paid today so #relax we're good ive been saving we're good #anyway i feel like garbage now and i need to go shower which im dreading but i cannot lay down like this thats gross and i also stink #ill post pics of them later im wiped

[savage-rhi]

I'm very much a, "fuck yeah and fuck you, I don't need validation! I'm me, cunts!" kinda fella, but sometimes I could use support.

#today i fucked up by reactivating my fb account which i haven't done in 2 yrs just to check on some folks id been sending good thought to #place is depressing everyone is miserable and everything feels fake and my mind is like #LOL this is why we left bitch byeeee #so i deactivated again went to work and idc what anyone says there are folks like me that can and do feel the energy and emotions coming of #people and it can fucking suck especially when so many are disregulated so i got a sensory overload and boss was nice enough to let me take #a bunch of breaks today and even scream in her office cause She Gets It (TM) #the weather is rainy and cold i'm getting so many fibro flares idk how i'm moving anymore #ive missed so many days of work already and it's not even fully winter yet i still have my job and im thankful i have an understanding team #but that doesnt pay the bills im still trying to find a way to pay for that doctor appointment coming up #graduate courses began for college and i think i'm gonna be okay but damn did they throw too much info all at once at me and that made #my adhd brain go WELL SHIT #ive been feeling incredibly lonely and not wanted in so many spaces that im struggling to even communicate with the few that i know do #love me for me and nothing else im trying so so so hard to keep being there for people and to keep loving #people that need it cause i don't ever want another human being to ever feel as miserable and unwanted as i have felt #but im also tired because i feel like thats all anyone ever sees me as just this being that can take their woes away and make them feel #amazing and i love that i can do that and listen to so many traumatic stories and help folks process that trauma my boss and many throughou #life have told me i have a gift for healing people and a vibe to me thats different than most and it feels good being around me but today i #just felt like people keep taking and taking and taking and i dont expect anything back thats not who i am id rather give than receive #but damn it i just wish someone could just give me the biggest hug in the world dont even have to say a thing just hold me and be present #and hold space for me to just feel weightless id cherish that more than anything in the world right now #on a positive note... #my dinosaur vo stuff got traction im getting a new cosplay put together i havent done that in 4 years i got to pet a wild deer i made #a coworker laugh so hard his juice went out his nose and my boss peed a little #im slowly taming another wild flock of turkeys and i got a bag of my favorite takis the guacamole flavor #i got a lot to be thankful for and i acknowledge it #but damn it im tired #thank you for coming to my Ted Talk rant and rave #if you made it this far: you're an incredible human being and i love you #please go treat yo self to something nice and know i love you for you

[pilotstreets]

sorry i haven't been super active lately, i've been reading a lot and turns out the pretty little liars books are addicting

#im going on vacation in 2!!!! days so i'll either be really active or not at all we'll see #giving two asl presentations on tuesday im Nervous but excited!!! #and i went bookshopping today to stock up for vacation and there's a bookstore and hour away where everything #is $1 and they have movies and cds too and i got like half the pll series #bc i only owned the first 4 but i skipped book 7 #so i can only take 5 and 6 with me and I'll probs finish those on the drive uppp #i'll see if we can stop by a bookstore sometime AND im rlly excited bc we're going to ohio #(who tf vacations in ohio) and the library has a GIFT SHOP im excited #AND THE WEATHER IS GOING TO BE MID 80S THE WHOLE TIME AND WHERE I LIVE WILL BE TRIPLE DIGITS #IM SO EXCITED FOR MID 80S IM EVEN PACKING A SWEATER #i..... need to pack #i have one day to pack and usually i pack days in advance but not this time lol #anywho. sorry for the rambles i am just talkative rn #;malls;

[imthatqueerkid]

#crush blogging day 38 #wow... i am so screwed #i didn't get to see him at school today because dentist appointment #side note my mouth is so sore because i needed extra of the numbing stuff #i was sad i didn't get to see him but then he said he could stop by my house on his way home #i wasn't sure if my mom would like that but she literally didn't care (affectionate) #my sister had to show him the music video she made (that i helped film) #and then we 'officially' adopted our son (read: stuffed animal dog) #and after that we cuddled and talked about a bunch of stuff #including paper hearts girl and why he feels so scared to reject her #it was really nice and i feel so comfortable and relaxed with him like i can just take a moment. and forget about all the stupid shit #and just be with someone who makes me happy #im not sure if im ever going to get over these intense 'reminders' that im attracted to him #woah there folks lets chill out #i feel like we made a lot of progress today #he was on my bed we were cuddling on my bed this isn’t the kind of thing that happens to me i barely believe it #he likes me back? what #he likes being around me he keeps the gifts i gave him ??? what. what #i love when he gets flustered it makes me heart so full cause hes trying his best #its a full length day tomorrow so im going to go to bed. definitely not stay up thinking about him! definitely not that #fire boy #from the couch #Spotify

[army-of-bee-assassins]

today has had perfect beautiful fall weather (with a bonus morning storm) for my bday and the anatomy quiz went okay enough that i think i got a B and now i'm chilling and trying to decide what sort of food i want to treat myself to for dinner. i don't know any good non fast food places where i live yet lol but i'll figure out something tasty. it's been a good day :)

#we also didn't have to do a lab in anatomy that was supposed to be scheduled for today so that was nice #and also a friend of mine (who is always crazy generous gifting steam games) fucking bought me three games off my wishlist #including elden ring so i have that now!! i may try my first souls game soon #i've already gotten several gifts in the mail and i know of several more that are still coming #and look i know you don't need gifts to have a good bday but i am still excited about pakiges and presents #i wore a nice outfit today including a mountain goats shirt my friend sent me :) #today i am just feeling like things are working out and i love all my friends 🥰 #j.txt

[yuelun]

This young man displayed the true prowess of alchemy to all, bringing with him a massive corpus of wisdom that even the Sumeru Akademiya did not possess. "The universe is heaven reversed, and the earth is a dream lost to time. This is dust, the most basic form of complex life." As if to provide evidence for this claim, Albedo lifted the burnt ash of the flower that once grew atop a Dendro Slime's head. Seconds later, a Cecilia sprouted forth from the ash in his hand. "And this… is new birth." (Albedo: Character Story)

When I've been wrecking my brain over whether or not Genshin draws the correlation between dust and ashes, and I happen to look into Albedo because of his tie (we can... call it that) to alchemy, and even the art of Khemia specifically which is the much more ancient form of it, and there it is. Now excuse me as I go ramble in my tags a little incoherently...

#[ mini study. ] she always sought to make everyone happy and one must say: she had quite the gift for it. #[ i've been mentally keeling over when it comes to creating a verse in which she's alive in present day. ] #[ because i don't like the idea of her surviving because i think the tragedy of her passing and then the destruction of the... ] #[ guili assembly is absolutely paramount to the creation and rebuilding of liyue harbor. ] #[ and also incredibly important to numerous characters; aka morax and all the adepti that she socialised with. ] #[ liyue's heart became intricately linked in its tragedy and loss. and it's from that-- that they built the most flourishing region. ] #[ or at least in my opinion. and it's why it's the region that speaks loudest to me. nothing hits quite as hard. ] #[ and nothing is quite as... touching. ] #[ nor do i find anything as incredible as all the adepti (gods included). but even the more 'minor' ones are so intertwined with... ] #[ liyue. and i just cannot deal. any way-- that isn't what this rambling was about. it was about bringing her into this... ] #[ embodiment of hope. of /life/. liyue. liyue harbour. ] #[ i just. i don't just want her in it for dynamics-- i mean yes i do. ten thousand times over i do. but also for /her/. ] #[ god i hear madame ping's words-- ] #[ of 'perhaps she will look at the liyue of today and steal a smile when she sees the prosperous land that it has become'... ] #[ because i need her to see-- no. not /see/ it. but experience it. feel it. /hear/ it. this little goddess who's always fallen in love... ] #[ with life itself through experiencing it in every way you can-- i need her to see liyue harbour. i need her to see... ] #[ what morax/rex lapis has created along with the adepti. what they've protected and continue to protect. but also /believe/ in. ] #[ i need her to see /that/. that on a level-- even if it wasn't done /for her/. i need her to see that something dear to her; her wishes. ] #[ those commandments. they're there. in the hearts of all of them. ] #[ i just.] #[ i also need to think about how she'd reform-- how she'd regain the corporeal form. is it something she's slowly gathering the power for- #[ throughout so long and she's able to again? would dottore/the gnosis/zhongli realistically be involved by for example... ] #[ using the gnosis as a battery-- something to collect/gather up elemental energy to allow her to reform faster? ] #[ as a... 'side' contract of sorts while it's given over? ] #[ would it not be needed? i just. lIFE COMES FROM DUST. I'M FINE. ] #[ god. this also ties into so many other hcs of her love /for/ humanity and /how/ she interacts within the concept of life as a whole. ] #[ it's fine. ] #[ ooc. ] wherever her spirit may be among the countless grains of sand and specks of dust between the harbor and the mountains…

[jackgoodfellow]

More WIPs from a project that was supposed to be a quick joke and is now A Whole Thing!

Here is a preliminary Hikari, and Samo's big brother! He has also escaped his genre, and he is not aware that most of the things he says sound incredibly threatening! Although only Hikari seems to notice anyway. (Luckily for Hikari, he really is a nice guy!)

@adamofingolstadt - a Hikari for you! 😊

#wips #i escaped my genre #once I finish these pieces I will post them with full image descriptions #original characters #the brother character has the same issue as tatsu from way of the house husband. he's a sweet guy who always sounds like a murderer! #Ya know for the last 2 years or so I have been pouring my heart and soul into a graphic novel (link to drafts in my blog description; #I've been told they are fun to read!) but somehow I have posted less art from that than I have for this! 😅 at least as far as tumblr goes. #There's a bunch on ao3. all this is quite alright tho - Silly side projects are actually absolutely vital to keep my love of art alive #and in the long run it will actually help me build the skills and passion I need to finish my novel! #I'm just hoping i have the juice to finish all this stuff in the next week so I can get back to the novel #but I am ultimately subject to whatever the ADHD decides. I hope if I take a break from this that I do come back to finish my other pieces #I am getting faster though. I drew both of these pieces in one day and also have time to work on the comic. #today was a wildly productive day. tomorrow I am going to concentrate on being a vegetable. 😤 #I must respect my body's rare gift of productivity by offering it rest and care. #I may change hikari's design a little bit but I think it's looking pretty good. added the ear piercings bc of the wonderful fan art I got! #honestly the fan art may be better than what I've made here - the bat with nails and the hands were SO good

[stillfruit]

i hate spending money i hate how it makes me feel even if there’s no rational reason for it i hate the guilt and the burden and the anxiety and the fear and the pressure and t

#i've been planning to buy an ipad for ltierally years now to upgrade my drawing setup from idk 2014 #i did it today but fuck i hate how it makes me feel to buy things that cost a lot of money y #i have to make decisions and be responsible for them and i never make good decisions my track record on that is absolutely terrible #i always make the wrong ones and i feel guilty always no matter what i do #so it's so much easier to just? not do anything and stay stagnant but then again i can't possibly want that in the long run #bc not accomplishing or doing anything only mkaes me wanna die more #this is even if it's not my money or probably even more if it's someone elses bc this is my parents' gift to me but sfsvdfvjds i want to cry #they bought me one few christmases ago but i returned it bc it was just too much and ic ouldn't deal with it #why is it so difficult for me i cannot receive things #i'm buying all the accessories etc but like that's difficult for me as well #bc even if now i can comfortable afford this thing what if i can't in the future what if i need that money in the future #i've tried thinking this as a combined christmas birthday etc gift from my parents and my own gift for myself for getting my bachelors #but. yeah #i know how this sounds like if someone said this to me itd be reasonable to be like stfu youre getting an ipad what are you crying about #i know this is incredibly privileged whining about nothing but this aversion to gifts and spenidng money is just something that #bothers me about myself bc it's an example of whats wrong with me #i cannot imagine being a person who loves receiving and giving physical gifts how do you live with the implications of those #gifts are nice!!! but they're also a Lot for me #anyway waiting for the say i won't be on the edge for literally no reason <3333 #shit talking

[girlwithfish]

scared all my shit wont fit in car Hmmm i need to pack and position everything very strategically. hopefully i only have a little extra added space

#I just have this big box w my pots and pans set i got for xmas that will take upspace and sjnce i went thrifting w lots of sweatersi wont b #able to fit those in my suitcase bc theyre bulky so ill prob have an extra bag for new clothes nd anotber extra bag for my bfs xmas gifts. #i shldnt have even brought my guitar i didnt plah it that much lol #if it was just my stuff i cld fit it i dont have that much its just hard cuz #My bfs stuff too plus we have to fit a small tv in the trunk nd everythinggg and another guitar. #Hmm #I wish i had a duffel bag or weekender bag bc i hate whenever i go to my bfs house or come home to visit family #i have too many bags like.small bags yotes cuz my suitcase is small nd then all my stuff liek laptpp book Extra clothes that dont fit whate #whstever doesnt fit in one bag so i just have random bags #maybe i just suckst packing and overpack who knos #I will try to pack today stuff i dont need so i dont do it all tmrw and the day of #zzzzzzzzzzz

[certified-pretty-boy]

hi this is incredibly off topic and none of you need to read this i just needed to Vent for a sec

#hi yes i need to vent somewhere and this is the least likely place for the ppl i don't want to see this to accidentally see it #god today has been rough #in good news mentally I'm not actually that bad #like I'm really aware that today could've sucked more and mentally i feel pretty reasonable alk things considered #but I'm dealing with a flare up and i woke up today just so incredibly sick #had to replan my entire day cancel therapy couldn't take a shower etc #my heart has been acting up really bad and i literally spent the first like 6 hours of the day Shaking i was so ill #and i had a minor fall and just overall feel a little bruised and banged up #and it's also a Bad pain night my ribs are fucking killing me breathing is Excruciating #and that's with my usual meds + my as needed ones #and multiple people I'm really close to who live far away are having a really hard time rn #and it's been rough having to just...sit back and watch them hurt all alone #i did get some work done on one of my younger sibling's b-day gifts though so hey at least there's that #anyways I'm tired and i really need to give all my close friends a hug asap and also i would like to cry for an extended period of time #off topic #seriously i do not expect any of you to read this far i just needed to feel like i was Telling Someone #and everyone i feel close enough to to actually personally tell is having too hard of a time rn #so i am simply venting into the vortex that is the tags on tumblr 😂

[vypcr]

hi besties I’m tired </3

#negative tw #[ooc] #that's code for getting hit hard by the stressy depressy again #idk just getting hit hard by a bunch of shit today out of nowhere #like a lot has happened over the past two years and basically the only friends I have in actual proximity to me live two hours away #so I can't go see them all the time. plus everyone is busy so we're lucky if we get to hang out once a month. #my best friend moved across the country last year and didn't tell me about it in advance or say goodbye #and we didn't fall out or anything and I should be over it but damn. idk. #the fact that I was at his house literally the day before he left to bring him a birthday gift and he said nothing to me about it #that shit hurt in a way I can't really explain. he was basically like my brother we grew up together. and then poof he's gone. #and I guess I didn't matter enough to be told about it lol #then the few other friends I had I kinda just. stopped associating with. mainly because they wouldn't return the energy yknow? #I felt like a permanent third wheel. #so really I'm grateful for the friends I've made here online because sometimes y'all are really the only ones who #don't make me feel like I'm alone 24/7 #I mean that with every ounce of love in my body. y'all don't know how you've helped hold me together this year. #but that's where my anxiety is a bitch because it's always this back and forth of like #one minute I feel like I'm not doing enough to reach out to my friends. the next minute I feel like I'm annoying. #which is literally just my brain being a bully. it's been like this for me for as long as I can remember. #idk fam I just needed to vent a minute I hold this shit in too much. back to shitposting now. #ignore<3 do not perceive <3<3

[inkskinned]

i got rickrolled today but it didn't work because i have adblocker installed, so youtube just told me i violated the terms of service. yesterday i was trying to edit a picture as a joke for my girlfriend, and google made me check a box to prove i'm human because i wasn't "searching normally".

it isn't just that capitalism is killing fun and whimsy, it is that any element of entertainment or joy is being fed upon by this mosquito body, one that will suck you dry at any vulnerability.

do you want to meet new friends in your city? download this app, visit our website, sign up for our email list. pay for this class on making a terrarium, on candlemaking, on cooking. it will be 90 dollars a session. you can go to group fitness, but only under our specific gym membership. solve the puzzle, sign up for our puzzle-of-the-month-club. what is a club if not just a paid opportunity - you are all paying for the same thing, which makes you a community.

but you're like me, i know it - you're careful, you try the library meetings and the stuff at the local school and all of that. the problem is that you kind of want really specific opportunities that used to exist. you are so grateful for libraries and the publicly-funded things: they are, however, an exception - and everything they have, they've fought tooth-and-nail to protect. you read a headline about how in many other states, libraries have virtually nothing left.

do you want to meet up with your friends afterwards? gift your friends the discord app. you can choose to go to a cafe (buy a coffee, at least), a bar (money, alcohol) or you can all stay in and catch a movie (streaming) or you can all stay in bed (rent. don't get me started) and scream (noise complaint. ticket at least).

you want to read a new book, but the book has to have 124 buzzwords from tiktok readers that are, like, weirdly horny. you can purchase this audiobook on audible! your podcast isn't on spotify, it's on its own server, pay for a different site. fuck, at least you're supporting artists you like. the art museum just raised their ticket price. once, they had a temporary exhibit that acknowledged that ~85% of their permanent art galleries were from cis white men, and that they had thousands of works by women (even famous women, like frida! georgia o'keefe!) just rotting in their basement. that exhibit lasted for 3 months and then they put everything away again.

walmart proudly supports this strip of land by the street! here are some flowers with wilting leaves. its employees have to pay out-of-pocket for their uniforms. my friend once got fined by the city because she organized a community pick-up of the riverfront, which was technically private property.

no, you cannot afford to take that dance class, neither can i. by the way - i'm a teacher. i'm absolutely not saying "educators shouldn't be paid fairly." i'm saying that when i taught classes, renting a studio went from 20 bucks an hour to 180 in the span of 6 months. no significant changes to the studio were made, except they now list the place as updated and friendly. the heat still doesn't work in the building. i have literally never seen the landlord who ignores my emails. recently they've been renting it out at night as an "unusual nightclub; a once-in-a-lifetime close-knit party." they spent some of those 180 dollars on LEDs and called it renovating. the high heels they invite in have been ruining the marley.

do you want to experience the old internet? do you want to play flash games or get back the temporary joy of club penguin? you can, you just need to pay for it. i have a weird, neurodivergent obsession with occasionally checking in to watch the downfall and NFT-ification of neopets. if i'm honest with you all - i never got into webkins, my family didn't have the money to buy me a pointless elephant. people forget that "being poor" can mean literally "if i buy you that toy, i can't afford rent."

you and i don't have time to make good food, and we don't have the budget for it. we are not gonna be able to host dinner parties, we're not made of money, kid. do you want some kind of 3rd space? a space that isn't home or work or school? you could try being online, but - what places actually exist for you? tiktok counts as social media because you see other people on it, not because they actually talk to you.

there was a local winter tradition of sledding down the hill at my school. kids would use pizza boxes and jackets and whatever worked, howling and laughing. back in september, they made a big announcement that this time, rules were changing, and everyone must pay 10 dollars to participate. when im not scared shitless, i kind of appreciate the environmental irony - it hasn't gone below 40. so much for snow & joyriding.

i saw a bulletin for a local dogwalking group and, nervous about making a good first impression, showed up early. the first guy there grimaced at me. "sorry," he said. "there's a 30-dollar buy-in fee." i thought he was joking. wait. for what? the group doesn't offer anything except friendship and people with whom to walk around the city.

he didn't know the answer. just shrugged at me. "you know," he said. "these days, everything costs money."

#spilled ink #warm up #“why did u tag it warm up” bc i wrote it off the cuff while drinkin coffee lol #btw the 30 dollar buy in for the dog walking is bc they pay the organizer a small pittance so she can #run fb ads and stuff and like she does put in a lot of work i don't mind paying her #but that's exactly what im fucking talking about like. #ppl can't afford to volunteer their time anymore and we all understand it!!! everything costs money for everyone! #like we didn't have to use to say ''do you mind paying me back for the stuff we ate'' #we used to be able to afford to feed our friends once in a while!!!

[whoevengaf]

Btw almost every single person in my uni housings corridor has been studying for like 3-5 years and they all looks so old and ive noticed that its just because when i look into the mirror i still see my 14 year old self

#may be because i lost 4 years of my life to depression induced memory loss EL OH EL! #like im going to throw upppppppppp im a 15 year old surrounded by people in their 20s ITS NOT NORMAL! #ive got some girls in my anglistics classes who are around my age btw and 1. theyre ALL ALMANS (german germans) 2. my age yet i STILL dont #fit in #and idk if i started uni too soon if uni is even right for me but i feel like i need to do something now or ill lose my mind #sham!s rambles #i ate only spaghetti and chocolate today and made my dream husband in sims 4 and ran around for an in-game week #gifting every villager their favourite items in stardew valley #because today was my rest day and i already have mandatory reading to do and im going to be sick #because when people say enjoy uni i didnt think its just 6/12 months in a year of stumbling through life #sorry for the friday night scaries 😭