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the-record · 16 days

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YOU’RE GONNA GO FAR

SUMMARY: you’d wait up for the rest of your life for nelly.

PAIRING: nell jackson x readership

WARNINGS: honestly a homoerotic friendship bc duh!!! death and grief

A/N: disclaimer that i have no idea if these times and dates r accurate but used my best context clues!!! anyways i actually like this one a lot :))

‘YOU’RE THE GREATEST THING WE’VE LOST’

tottenham, 1698

you didn’t understand. she was leaving? with some man, captain jackson, none of you knew.

“but why?” you ask, feeling out of breath. “what about george and roxy?” your eyes fill with tears as you pace in-front of nelly. “what about me?”

she stops you, grabbing your hands and pulling you in-front of her. she’s sitting on your bed, legs spread just enough to be ‘un-ladylike’. “george and roxy have pa, they’ll be fine.” her hands grip yours tighter than they ever have as she stares into your eyes. youre sure she can see your soul, can read your every thought. “and you’ll be fine. some fella will want you, im sure of it.”

you scoff and shake off her hands. “i don’t want some fella nelly, i want you to be here!” you laugh as you shake your head in disbelief. “don’t know why i try, you wont listen anyways.” the sun sets slowly outside your window and you watch as it gets darker. “think you should be getting home.” nelly sighs like she wants to say more but you shake your head. “not a suggestion, go home.”

she knows better than to fight you on it, no matter how much she wants to stay here and help you make sense of it. you avoid her gaze as she walks out, not responding to the quiet ‘bye’ she says as she leaves.

it’s been days since nelly talked to you, she was getting nervous you wouldn’t say goodbye when they left tomorrow.

“nelly,” roxy’s got george in her arms as she helps around the pub. “she came round, said to meet you by some tree.” nelly doesn’t need roxy to clarify who ‘she’ is before she sets off.

she finds you sitting the base of the tree, your back against the trunk. hair tucked in a bonnet and laundry dress on, nelly doesn’t think you’ve ever looked more beautiful.

she slows down as she gets closer, taking the time to walk the distance and pray you dont hate her. she doesn’t think she could handle that. you look up when she’s just a few feet away and give her a gentle, friendly smile. nelly is out of breath, but trying, and failing, to hide it. flopping down beside you, she stares while waiting for you to speak.

“i’m sorry.” it’s quiet, and maybe unsure. you don’t look at her when you say it, eyes favoring the field across the path. “wasn’t trying to be mean,” you start. “feel like im gonna be here forever. and i just…” you trail off and pick at the grasses. “just scared of missin’ you.” your heart feels like it’s going to fall out of your chest at the admission.

but she finds it endearing and sweet. and she finds that a part of her feels the same. “i hope you do,” she teases. “need a reason to come home, don’t i?” you smack her shoulder, but you laugh. nelly saves the sweet sound in the back of her mind.

“i’m always gonna be waiting up for you, nell.”

true to your word, you wait for six years. 2,361 days of waiting when word finally comes.

nelly, your nelly, dead. alongside that horrible captain jackson who stole her all those years ago. you blame him.

a light switches off after that.

roxy becomes bit more reserved, she works more. she dedicates the rest of her free time to her pa and george. they fight over nelly, over the gravestone he wouldn’t buy.

sam was always hardheaded, but even more so now. he pretends her death doesn’t affect him, but in the quiet at night in the privacy of his room, he thinks of her.

george was too young to ever really know nelly, but she feels a sort of loss. she grieves the sister she never got to truly experience.

you cut off the trotters, suddenly their existence being to strong of a reminder. you dream about her nearly every night.

“m’lady,” nelly snatches your hand and pulls you towards her as you walk through the field. she kneels and you fake gasp. “will you give me your hand in marriage?” her toff impression makes you laugh but you try to hold it in as you nod. a dandelion turned ring is placed on your marriage finger. “connects to your heart y’know.”

you inspect it carefully, catching it in the low sun. “i suppose that’ll do.”

you don’t sleep much anymore.

you’re on your way to your shift at the laundry when roxy shows up in-front of you, completely out of breath. she doesn’t say a word, just takes your hand and pulls you with her. you trust the girl not to question it and follow her to the talbot.

an army man stands talking to sam by the bar but youre only confused for a moment.

“nelly?” roxy’s voice is breathless, ever so slightly deeper than the last time you talked. more mature. but you don’t have time to worry about that when the army man turns.

and nelly makes sense now.

she’s here, ginger curls tucked under a hat. freckles still decorating her cheeks. lips cracked and split on one side, but forever the prettiest shade of pink.

she catches roxy and you think you may fall over yourself. because she’s dead. for a year now. you worry your imagining it all, stuck in a nightmare. but when she calls your name and youre pulled out of a trance, you know she’s real. she’s here. alive.

“you’re dead.” you whisper, not truly meaning to. she’s confused for a moment, looking over to roxy who nods in agreement.

nelly raises her eyebrows. “well that explains the way everyone’s looking at me.”

your head shakes and you have to take a step back, then forward, before ultimately turning on your heel and leaving. walking as far as your tired legs will take you. over to the graveyard and to her ‘headstone’ roxy and george made her.

nelly jackson. 1683-1704.

you didn’t imagine it. youre not sure how long you’ve been there when they girls come up behind you, chatting away. making up for lost time. you still can’t wrap your head around it.

a letter told you all of her passing alongside captain jackson, her husband. you grieved the girl for months. watched as the trotters changed to fit the loss of her soul.

yet now she walks side by side the girls and stops beside you at the wooden cross. “well.” you stand up and look from her to the cross. “roxy, george, give us a minute. yeah?” the girls walk away, a newfound pep.

“i don’t get it.” you say as your hand wipes down your face. “you dont write, visit, send any word for six years. you die, and now youre here.” your hands flail as you speak. “seven years, nelly, seven. and now youre back?”

she’s quiet for a moment, thinking of what to say. “nell.”

you laugh sarcastically, utterly confused. “what?”

“nell.” she says again. “not nelly anymore.”

you could slap her. she deserves it. “are you bloody serious?” and when you laugh again, it’s not the one she saved in a box in her mind. it’s empty. “that’s all you have to say.”

“i was widowed, captain jackson, he was blown up at the battle of blenheim.” nelly, nell, explains. “apparently i was too.” she adds. “didn’t know or i would’ve found someone to write.”

it’s enough for now. enough to satisfy you and break your heart. enough to fill you with guilt. “oh nell.” your arms find their way around her neck, clicking into place like a puzzle piece. her own wrap around your waist and bring you close. you stay like that for a moment, not nearly long enough. “i waited for you.”

nell laughs, a real true laugh that lets your reality set in place. she’s here. truly really here with you. “i knew you would.”

childish as it may be, you slept over at the trotters several times after nell’s return. you had a lot to catch up on after all.

the night’s were quiet, the both of you speaking softly as to not wake anyone.

“my mum’s hounding me to find a husband,” you sigh, playing with a rogue curl by her face. her own hand traces along your side while she listens intently. “i dread the day she finds one for me.”

nell’s quiet for a moment. she takes in the moment. you laying down beside her with your arm reaching towards her face. she’s propped up her head with a hand and is memorizing your features. not new, but now different than they used to be. a part of her wishes to stay here forever. another dreams to explore the world.

“i could make a good husband.” she jokes. but you don’t laugh, don’t even smile. she sees you adopt this far off look and she worries she’s upset you. “hey,” you snap back and nod, a fake smile adorning your face after a moment. “what’s wrong?” she whispers, leaning ever so slightly closer.

but you shake your head and dismiss it. “tired.” nell knows you’re lying, you could stay up all night. but she doesn’t push, she instead nods and blows out the candle. she lays down and let’s you slide closer until your head finds her shoulder and your eyes close. “take me with.”

nell hums, confused. “what’d you mean?”

“next time you leave.” you say softly.

“i’m tired of waiting up.”

‘AND WE’LL ALL BE HERE FOREVER’

#! kates babes !#nelly jackson x reader #nell jackson #nell jackson x reader #renegade nell #nelly jackson #roxy trotter #george trotter #sam trotter

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busylickingsatansballs · 5 days

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Climb inside of me.

Nell Jackson x reader

Summary: Nell left you, will you give her a chance to make explain herself.

Notes: it only took me an hour, it's based off of a poem.

Inspired by the song Again - Noah Cyrus and XXXTENTACION

It hurt in a way you’d never felt before when she left, like grieving a missing limb. And then she’d died that pain was multiplied to the point of suffocation.

Then one night at the Talbot you saw her swan in the same way she left and your head started to spin.

She was back. And real, not something you’d made up to ease the grief.

You jump up and head for the front door heart pounding in your ears. Disappearing without so much as a back glance.

It killed her. So she’d asked Roxy to talk to you being too much of a coward to do it herself.

Roxy raced down the next day practically begging you to go see her. No doubt Nell had asked her to but you’d refused to let yourself even be entertained by the idea.

“she wants to see you ya know” your head was already shaking side to side before she’d finished.

“She made her choice, she can just deal with it Roxy.” You had a very that was that tone as you fixed your hair, hands smoothing over your dress.

So Roxy didn’t waste her breath asking twice.

Fingers twist the material at your side, something you only did when nervous.

She’d frozen a second, hesitated like she wanted to say more but didn’t.

Knowing you were putting on a front deep down you wanted to see her, she relayed the message anyway.

The deflated look in Nell’s eyes when you refused to see her, broke her heart.

Muttering a sorry as she patted Nell in passing.

Nell couldn’t sleep that night. No matter how much she tossed and turned, fingers twisting in the sheets the gnawing, absence never settled.

Your face wouldn’t leave her mind.

You were best friends why couldn’t you forgive her?

Or at least you used to be before she ruined everything. There was no expectation of easiness but time had made her forgetful of your stubborn nature.

She’d get you back even if it killed her.

You’d grown up together, she wasn’t going to be stupid enough to let you go twice.

You the educated daughter of a wealthy doctor and Nell the uneducated daughter of a tavern owner.

She had no idea what you even saw in her sometimes but my god did she want to be seen by you.

You’d even slept in the same bed growing up, all snuggled up close under fading candle light fingers tight around your waist and Nell tried to pretend that it didn’t mean anything.

The delicate way you brushed your fingers over her features, faces just inches apart leaning close as you whispered to avoid waking anyone.

You consumed her. Lit the spark in her chest, she burned for you.

That burn bled into your everyday lives, she could barely contain herself when the local men tried their luck. It was met with a polite decline from yourself or Nell threatening to beat the infatuation out of any boy who mustered up the courage to try.

Nell sometimes caught herself wishing she was a boy it would make everything so easy.

She’d make a good husband. Nobody would ever hurt you, make you cry or take advantage of your kindness again.

She’d always known she wasn’t like most girls and you only made it more obvious.

The thoughts started to scare her becoming more intense as you aged. So she’d done the only thing she could and married Jackson leaving as soon as possible. He was a good man, had understood her situation. Understood he was her way out.

Understood she would never be a normal wife.

You’d been heartbroken, friends your whole lives and not even a goodbye.

One day she was there and the next gone like a ghost.

Nell Jackson had broken your heart.

Eyes darting back and forth between your notes ignoring the burn in your eyes,

Thumbs rub them blurry but Nell’s face doesn’t leave your mind.

Your stomach twists with excitement as you finish writing a possible cure for a disease you’d been working on.

She seemed to be a lot of places you were lately.

You grown suspicious, suspecting Roxy of foul play sometimes but lacked the proper evidence to accuse.

You always found an excuse to leave. She didn’t need us, didn’t need you.

You’d avoided Nell for weeks, Roxy thought it was silly you opting to drink at home throwing yourself into your work.

Couldn’t you see that they needed you? Nell needed you?

You’d see the girls in passing but not as before, it was hard and you missed them but you all needed the space you’d convince yourself to ease the guilt.

You leaned back in your office chair stretching tired limbs throwing the book to the growing pile as you enjoy the silence.

It would be dark in a few hours so you wanted to enjoy the last few hours of sunlight in peace.

You’d earned a rest. Earned a break from your inner torment even if just for a moment.

Being the towns doctors daughter, people came to you all hours for help.

You didn’t mind of course.

You were a sweetheart and the town loved you for it, beautiful, clever and exceptionally wealthy you had it all.

Well except a husband. But who wanted one of those?

Men were loud, rough and selfish. None of which appealed to you, women were soft, warm and smelled good.

Life would be so much easier if you could marry each other.

You often caught yourself wondering what it would be like curling up next to someone soft and warm..

A shake of your head puts a stop to that train of thought.

Those thoughts were for later, when it was dark and you could pretend your hand was possessed, working of it’s own volition under your night gown. The thoughts that clouded your mind were put there by the devil himself to torment you.

You caved every time.

Especially these last few weeks you’d find Nell’s face creeping in more.

Which only made it harder to look at her.

You’d had proposals from all sorts of men looking to marry into your family, the ones looking for love. The ones who wanted money, the ones who wanted to use your brilliance for their own selfish reasons.

You turned them all down.

One of the few lucky enough to have parents that didn’t care much about marriage marrying for love themselves.

The knock on your door startles, bringing you back to reality. You aren’t expecting anybody but then again you suppose you never were.

You look though the peephole, squinting till Nell’s features came into focus.

You swing the door open with more force than needed, Nell blinks in surprise.

“what do you want?” you know you sound rude, you try not to care.

Hurt flashes over her features but it’s so fleeting you could have imagined it.

“well a hello wouldn’t go a miss” irritation brews in your chest but it’s overshadowed with the ache of missing her.

You wanted to cry, bury your head in her neck and never let go.

“if I wanted to say hello I’d have called.” You quip cheeks hot.

You turn before she can see heading back the way you came with Nell at your heels.

You think you hear her close the door behind you.

You hope she has, it was hardly the safest village.

It doesn’t take long before your back in your office sitting back at your work station.

“figured I’d save you the trouble” she stops awkwardly in the middle of the room taking it all in.

The overwhelming rows of books, ingredients. Scribbled notes scattering the table, Nell doesn’t think she’s ever seen so many books in her life.

“that why you’re here, to say hello?” your words come out thin and pinched, you find yourself silently cringing at your own voice.

If Nell notices she doesn’t say anything.

“Yeah well, I missed ya” her fingers tap against a jar as she stares at the contents.

Your eyes watch Nell’s frame, she moves slow eyes scanning the various bottles and jars filled with all sorts.

“your the one who left” you huff.

“didn’t feel I ‘ad a choice” she’s looking at you now eyes gazing into your own.

“a goodbye would have been nice” you mutter.

“m sorry”

Nell continues to study your shelves and the silence stretches on.

Too long.

“don’t touch that” your across the room in seconds hand gripping her wrist tightly, alarm in your tone.

Nell jars slightly, looking at your grip on her wrist.

“It’s a paralytic.” You offer, her blank stare let’s you know she doesn’t understand so you carry on.

“you’ll be unable to move, paralysing your body and lungs eventually until you suffocate and die.”

“Cheery” Nell lowers her eyes and you realise with great embarrassment you still haven’t let go of her wrist.

Dropping her wrist you put away the deadly concoctions in sight as a precaution.

“Sorry, I just didn’t want you to die.” You offer lamely.

Nell’s heart sores at your words, you still cared. “I wouldn’t worry about that, I’m magic.” her joke confuses you tone awkward.

Nell knows she sounds lame but she doesn’t know what else to offer.

You meet her gaze properly, her eyes are so pretty.

“did I do something wrong?” Nell’s mind goes blank, how could you ever do anything wrong?

“Course not, why would you think that?” you grip your skirt fingers tightening and untightening. Twisting and pulling until you can’t anymore.

Nell’s grip tightens around your hand gently pulling the offending hand from your already creased skirt.

“because you never said goodbye.” and it sounds like the most childish thing in the world to be upset about.

But you are.

She pulls you in, slowly guiding you until your eye level with her chin.

You daren’t let your eyes stray further. Her hand moves to hold your own squeezing gently.

“I didn’t want to hurt ya, I had to leave. Had to leave before I did something stupid,” and of course it makes no sense.

“Stupid? I don’t understand” you pull gently, Nell doesn’t let go.

Pushing your wrists down until she’s forced to let go you take a step back.

“Stop talking in riddles and just be honest with me.”

Her brain freezes and she finds her mouth opening and closing without a sound coming out.

And so she does the only thing that she can, she kisses you.

Her lips are soft, warm. Unskilled they work against yours urgently.

Heat shoots down your spine coiling tight in your lower belly as she pushes you gently into the bookshelf behind.

You think you hear something fall but you don’t care. She’s so soft, eager and my god does she smell good.

Gasping for air you reluctantly pull back, releasing a shaky breath foreheads pressed together.

You think you hear here apologising but it doesn’t register.

How on earth could she be sorry for that?

“I shouldn’t have done that” it’s not an apology but close enough.

“why not?” Nell doesn’t have an answer, you didn’t seem upset which was a win.

She steps back and you panic.

Nell doesn’t miss it, moving closer to soothe you. “hey I ain’t goin nowhere” relaxing, you nod and step closer.

“it’s going to be dark soon, you should stay.”

Nodding wordlessly, Nell finds herself hypnotised as you lead her upstairs.

Finding herself in your bedroom watching you undress for bed, Nell can’t help but feel like the luckiest person in the world perching on the end of your bed.

You blush turning to find her gaze already on you.

“you sleeping like that?” you gesture towards her outfit. Trousers, boots, hat and a gentleman’s coat.

Pulling off her boots and coat, she hangs her hat over your bedpost, you blow out the candle.

Pushing herself up the bed as you crawled to meet her.

Snuggling up you press your head against her chest as you both get comfortable.

Whatever happened, you had each other. You were home.

#quote lesbian poetry #nell jackson #renegade nell #magic #Nell jackson x reader #Nell jackson fanfic #Lesbian imagine #sapphic #Sapphic friendship #derry girls #charles devereux #roxy trotter #george trotter #Renegade nell imagine #Fanfic #billy blind

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czechtex · 5 days

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Having thoughts this morning about 1x6. Specifically that moment where George is held hostage with a hot fire poker and Nell takes one look at the situation and goes "I'll do anything you want just let her go". I just have so many thoughts about the bond between the three sisters but the relationship between George and Nell is always especially touching.

#renegade nell #nell jackson #george trotter #roxy trotter

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jaymehargreeves · 25 days

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Her fingers buzz as she utters the words.

They’d begged her not to try it - Roxy and George, they’d begged her not to touch the spell. There’s something dark about it, Roxy had said, something twisted. And Nell isn’t a fool, she’s seen the affects that magic can have firsthand, in Broadwater, and it was hardly anything pretty; but they’re out of options now.

They need her, all of them; they need her to keep them safe and this is what it’s come to. And she refuses to let them down.

So she called for the boys to hold her sisters back, keep them calm, and she’d started to utter the words. And though Nell Jackson is hardly known for her literary abilities, the words flow off the page and past her lips so naturally it’s as if they’d been written in her mind, long ago.

Her fingers buzz. The spell swells up in an awful, roaring crescendo and she feels the very moment it takes ahold. It pricks at her skin. It wraps around her lungs and it squeezes.

She pushes out the final word, the final syllable, and her whole body is alight, then, suddenly.

Someone is yelling. Roxy, or maybe George, or both of them together. In the moment, in the chaos, they sound almost like her mother.

It’s terrifying.

The magic doesn’t cease, not all at once. It lingers there, a few agonising seconds and it lingers, crushing her infinitely. Against the force of it all, she wills the bastard spell to work.

And then her head jerks back, her finger tips go numb and in an instance she is on the ground, a crumpled mess of a woman. Voices at all sides of her, hands grabbing at her skin, at her clothes, shaking and pulling and holding on.

Pain and exhaustion wash over her in waves. But deep, in the pits of her soul, she feels something warm, something akin to hope. As her consciousness slips, Nell thinks;

At least I kept them safe.

#renegade nell #nell jackson #roxy trotter #george trotter #my writing #just a little thing idk idk

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servants-hall · 6 months

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The Gilded Age 2x03

#the gilded age #tga s2 #tga spoilers #bertha russell #george russell #mr. watson #jack trotter #adelheid weber #mrs. bruce #marian brook #peggy scott #agnes van rhijn #dorothy scott #larry russell #susan blane #dashiell montgomery #aurora fane #ada brook

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lesbiangummybearmafia · 4 months

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cj-the-human-disaster · 4 months

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I have done it! I’ve started writing the Jack and Gladys fanfic! (With a side of OC romances, Bertha and George, and ✨Larian✨) I’m just trying to write ahead since I’m starting my final semester soon. So… yeah!

#I hope you guys will like it when I eventually post it #the gilded age #the gilded age hbo #marian brook #larry russell #bertha russell #george russell #peggy scott #agnes van rhijn #gladys russell #jack trotter #jack x gladys #marian x larry #Larian #larry x marian

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spiderliliez · 1 month

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George clarifies. 😊 RENEGADE NELL (2024)

[+] LOUISA HARLAND 😎 [+] LGBTQ 🏳️‍🌈 [+] ..more on “Renegade Nell” 🎬

#Renegade Nell #Louisa Harland #Florence Keen #Nell Jackson #Nelly Jackson #George Trotter #Sally Wainwright #LGBTQ

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onefail-at-atime · 4 months

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Fandom, I need your opinions.

Who do we want Gladys to end up with?

Archie Baldwin? Does he come back with an apology and a promise to never let her parents separate them again?

Jack Trotter? I've seen whispers about how they could fall in love once they meet after he goes into business with her brother.

Billy Carlton? He seemed sweet enough, but he did just appear out of nowhere in order to reiterate that Gladys is interested in the younger society crowd and has absolutely no interest in the Duke.

An OC? Should a young man arise from the crowd of society to sweep Gladys off her feet and take her away from New York?

You decide.

#gilded age #gladys russell #the gilded age #bettha russell #gilded age hbo #gilded age max #archie baldwin #jack trotter #billy carlton #george russell #larry russell

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the-record · 19 days

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FOREVER

SUMMARY: nell’s gone to find a surgeon and you hate the idea of it

PAIRING: nell jackson x reader

WARNINGS: george being injured :(( shes just a baby

A/N: i love this outfit sm the cape is so cute

‘FOREVER WAS A SENTENCE, A SENTENCE TO DEATH’

“i’m not staying back here nell! i’m serious.” you yelled as you rushed after her. “you can’t keep leaving me behind!”

she groaned and stopped, turning to face you. “it’s dangerous.” you shrugged at her, an exasperated look on your face. “i am not leading you head first into trouble. i won’t!” she started off again but stopped when she heard your footsteps follow. she bent over, hands on her knees. “go back and look after george.”

you couldve screamed. “she’s got roxy, she’s fine.”

nell steps forward and takes your hands in hers. you shy at the way she stares, trying to understand. “why can’t you just stay here, where its safe. that’s all i ask.” her fingers tangle with yours.

you take a minute to really look at her, take her in. her messy curls tamed and pulled up. freckles littering her cheeks, a small sunburn under them. the nicest dress you’ve ever seen her wear covered by a cape. her hands are calloused, dry, and covered in dirt around yours, a tight grip.

“i hate to know youre alone.” you whisper.

she shakes her head and smiles sweetly, “i’m not. i promise you.” nell pulls you close, arms wrapping around your shoulders and tucking your head into her neck. “you don’t have to worry about me, i can handle myself.” you nod, breathing her in and holding her as close as you can. “besides, i’ve got rasselas.”

you watch her and rasselas leave, standing till you can no longer see the carraige before heading back. the door slams behind you as you walk in and you wince, scared you’ve woken george. only roxy looks up, an apologetic face.

“no such luck?” you shake your head and walk over to the younger girl. she leans against you as you both watch george sleep. “i hate to see her like this.” roxy says quietly. “can’t get her to stop talking and playing normally.”

your arms wrap around her and squeeze. “she’ll be back to her old self in no time. nell’s gonna find a surgeon to fix her up.” you press your lips to the top of the girls head before turning to sit at the window.

the three of you sit at george’s side that night, she’s fast asleep and so is roxy.

you comb your fingers through nell’s hair, pulling the knots undone. she’s tired, head falling forward every so often.

“been a while since someone’s taken care of me.” her voice is quiet and laced with sleep. she stops your hands with one of hers, reaching back and holding them while she turns to see you.

you stand, laughing softly when she takes your hand to stop you. you pull away gently, a promise in your eyes to come back. she watches you search for a clean cloth and dip it in a bit of water, wring out the excess.

you wipe at her face when you return, taking extra care around the small cuts still healing. her hands are wiped carefully and gently by you.

“i can feel your eyes.” you tease, flickering your own up to look at her. she smiles, caught red handed. “d’you think she’s gonna be alright?” you ask quietly, something stuck in the back of your throat.

nell turns to look at george, her face soft with love for the young girl. she nods, “she’s strong, stronger than me.” she leans back and opens her arms. “c’mere.”

you fall into her, tired from the day. her arms pull you close, staying after you’ve gotten situated. “she’s so little.” nell looks down and follows your eyes over to george. “and roxy, she’s still young even if she doesn’t think she is.”

she pushes the hair out of your face and moves your head to look at her. “they’re gonna be okay. we’ll get ‘em both to my uncle then me and you,” she says, smiling, “we’ll go to america. make somethin’ of ourselves.” you nod when she does.

“seems like you thought a lot about this.” you tease. “i hate to leave the girls though.” nell nods in agreement.

“it’s for the best through, hm?” she relaxes back against the side of the bed with a sigh. “the surgeon,” she says, “he’s got a brother. a magistrate.” you look up at her in disbelief. “said i should go see him, ‘parently he can help us.”

you take a moment, trying to force words out of your mouth. “you’re serious?”

nell nods and presses a kiss to your temple. “now sleep, im not going nowhere.”

‘I’M GLAD I GET FOREVER TO SEE WHERE YOU END’

#! kates babes !#nell jackson #nell jackson x reader #nelly jackson x reader #nelly jackson #roxy trotter #george trotter #renegade nell #louisa harland

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theshelbyclan · 9 days

Text

Wives and husbands

Summary: Nell has a little talk with her sisters about love

A/N: this one was requested by a lovely anon, which came at a perfect timing because I’ve just binged the series and I absolutely love it! Also, I had the afternoon off for once. So here we go, written pretty quickly, and I hope you like it 😊

———

“How’s George?” Nell walked into the abandoned house at the deserted plague village and inquired loudly.

Roxy was just redressing her little sister’s wound and replied, “The ointment seems to work.”

“How did you get by that then?”

Roxy shrugged, but George quipped, “Roxy made it. She’s magic, Nell.”

“No she’s not,” Nell laughed, but added, “Are ya?”

“Dunno… it’s like something happens to me sometimes…”

The eldest Trotter paused and looked at her two younger sisters. The weight of the responsibility heavy on her shoulders, she sighed.

“It’s true!” George said, “She can see things, like around people and stuff.”

“Is that right?”

“It’s more like…” Roxy pondered, fiddling with the bandages, “It’s more like I can feel it. Like I get all warm and tingly and it’s just… there.”

“Right,” Nell pushed her aside and corrected the bandages, “That sounds an awful lot like something you’re far too young for.”

“Not that!”

“Not what?” George asked at once.

Both sister replied in unison, “Nothing!”

A few moments later, they’d finished taking care of her and George was back tucked into bed. But she didn’t want to sleep. She wanted to know, “Are you talking about Roxy and Rasselas again? Like them kissing and that?”

“ ‘And that?’ “ Nell raised her eyebrows and turned to Roxy, “And bloody what?”

“Nothing!” She sighed, “We didn’t do nothing!”

“You better not! We don’t have time for all of that, you know that. And also, you’re still an actual child, so don’t even…”

But Roxy had had enough of it and interrupted, “Like you’re one to speak. You were sixteen, same as me, when you up and vanished with your Captain Jackson. To what, drink tea with him? Don’t treat me like I’m an idiot, Nell!”

“I don’t want you to get hurt, that’s all,” she replied with some more sympathy in her voice.

“Rasselas wouldn’t hurt me. Besides, I’m a lot smarter than you.”

Nell opened her mouth to contradict, but decided against it. She was probably right actually. So she took another sip of her brandy instead.

George was the first one to speak again, “Did you like Captain Jackson, Nell?”

“Yeah, I liked him…”

“You don’t sound too sure,” Roxy scoffed.

“Come on, Rox, you knew what it was like. I was going mad up in that little pub, trapped between those four walls! I needed to find me a way out and so I did.”

“So you basically just used him?”

“No, it wasn’t even like that. If anything, we used each other, I suppose.”

“Yeah,” Roxy pushed, “but did you love him?”

“I dunno… Now, can we please just forget about all this mush and move on? We’ve got stuff to do!” Nelly got up and started walking away.

But George wasn’t going to let things go that easily, “Would you marry again, Nell? Get another husband?”

“Yeah, of course. Maybe… I don’t know!” She sighed, “No. probably not.”

“She’s too busy playing the hero,” Roxy motioned at her little sister, “She doesn’t have time for what’s most important, does she?”

That made Nell stop. And she took Roxy’s hand and carefully said, “I know you think love is the most important thing right now. Of course you do, you’re only sixteen! Why do you think I ran off with some Captain I hardly knew at that age? I thought I was in love. And it was the most important thing. But it’s not. Keeping you two safe; that’s all that matters to me now, all right? Family is the most important thing. And after Pa… Well, we need to stick together and find a way out of this mess, yeah? Once I’ve got you two safe and settled, then I’ll think about love.”

Roxy visibly softened and smiled. Her sister wasn’t that bad, she was just built completely different from her. Roxy did all the thinking, but Nell did all the action. They were good together though.

“Then will you find a husband?” a high voice asked hopefully.

“I might!” Nell grinned, “Might even find myself a wife!”

“You can’t have a wife…”

“And why the hell not?”

“You’re not a man, Nelly, you’re my sister.”

“Don’t call me ‘Nelly’”, she muttered for the 10th time that week. “Yeah, but when I went out to get you that fancy doctor, I was the honourable Scottish so and so, right? So I could be a gentleman with a wife.”

“Yeah but that was just you playing dress up. Pretending, right?”

“Was I?”

George frowned, “Yeah, because you don’t like dresses.”

Nell had no idea how to explain all of this to a nine-year-old, “They’re just not for me.”

“Why?”

“I dunno, George! They just feel… wrong.”

Roxy looked down and waited. She’d known this for a long time already. She’d known Nell for a long time already.

“But you’re not a man neither, right?” George continued.

“Maybe I’m… neither. I like being able to go in and out, if that makes sense?”

“It doesn’t.”

“Do you like being call Georgiana?”

“No. I’m George.”

“Exactly!”

George looked at Roxy and said, “She’s not like you.”

“No, Roxy is the sensible one in the family. Or at least, she was, until she started going all lovey dovey over a boy she hardly knows…”

“Oh, shut up!” Roxy threw back. But to George she added, “It’s like with Nell, the clothes don’t really matter, right? But she can be a man and people will think she’s a man, and she can be a woman. But in the end, she’s not anything, because it’s just Nell, right? And she doesn’t like feeling trapped, like she said.”

“Right!” Nell beamed, “That’s what I mean.”

“So, is that why you’d rather fancy a wife…?”

“Maybe.”

“It’s not that complicated, George,” Roxy explained, “People just want you to be a certain way, but you don’t have to be anything. Just be you.”

Nell looked at her with admiration, “You really are much better at this than I am, Rox.”

“I know.”

Clearly thinking hard, George eventually said, “I think I’d rather fancy a wife myself.”

Nell rolled her eyes, “Absolutely not. I cannot deal with another one falling in love, all right? No wives or husbands or any kind of entanglements for you. Ever. Is that understood?”

Roxy laughed, which somehow annoyed Nell even more, “I’m serious!”

“Sure you are.”

And with that Nell stalked off, shouting over her shoulder: “No wives, no husbands, neither of you, alright!”

“Fine,” George sighed, “I’d much rather be my own wife anyways.”

Roxy grinned at her, “Good for you, George.”

#renegade Nell #Nelly Jackson #renegade Nell fanfic

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