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teecupangel · 4 months

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Crack idea where all the ancestors end up in modern day after dying as honey badgers

Desmond thought it was a raccoon.

In his defense, it was dark and Desmond hadn’t sleep after a grueling 12 hours shift that included drunken sorority girls hitting on him and a recently divorced drowning his sorrow with drinks asking him if he would ever consider having sex with him.

Desmond had been tempted with the amount he slurred and the promise of gifts.

Then he remembered that he wasn’t really interested in sleeping with anyone right now, not even for the sake of becoming financial secured for a few months or until the poor guy finally moved on.

He had this strange feeling that he was being watched but there was never anyone there.

He was worried that his parent’s cult had found him.

He’s still worried about it, even going as far as chickening out on getting a motorcycle license because of that eerie feeling.

His bag is all packed up and ready.

But Desmond enjoyed his life here in New York.

He was getting off-topic.

The little guy trying to climb out of the trashbin behind Desmond’s apartment building froze and stared at Desmond when he walked closer.

Desmond just wanted to get to his apartment and sleep.

The backdoor was closer to the rickety elevator than the main door and the underpaid (if that kid was even getting paid, Desmond heard his uncle was the owner of the building) young man who usually stayed in the lobby would leave the backdoor unlock so he could take a smoke break every other hour.

The ‘raccoon’ stared at him.

Desmond stared back.

Then…

It tried to get out of the bin but it seemed like one of its feet was stuck so Desmond helped it.

His mind didn’t even get to warn him how wild animals could just as easily bite him and then he’d have to get a rabies shot.

The creature didn’t bite him though.

It just kept staring at him.

And Desmond just left.

The following day, the raccoon was there by the backdoor once more and held out his front paws at him.

Desmond didn’t know why he did it but he picked it up.

And brought it home.

The second day the creature was staying in his apartment, Desmond left the window open.

Or so he thought.

He probably did, right?

It’s not like the creature was the one to leave it open.

Right?

When he returned home, the creature had multiplied.

There were now three creatures in his apartment and they all stared at Desmond and followed him around.

Three weeks after he let the three creatures (honey badgers, they were freaking honey badgers, Desmond is so embarrassed whenever he remembered he thought they were raccoons) live with him…

Two more honey badgers appeared.

He was sure that he didn’t leave the window open this time.

He stared at the one with the red ribbon (he needed a way to distinguish them so they were now: Red, White and Blue) and dryly stated, “They’re the last ones, okay? I’m not adopting anymore.”

Desmond’s mental state might not be as stable as he assumed because he was pretty sure the honey badgers stared back at him and he could hear it say “you didn’t adopt us, we adopted you, idiot.”

Desmond guessed this was his life now.

He can only console himself with the thoughts that he was probably still not the weirdest person in New York at the moment.

#gasp for once #desmond is not one turned into an animal #he has however technically turned into a #desmond is a disney princess #assassin's creed #desmond miles #ask and answer #teecup writes/has a plot #fic idea: assassin's creed #i'm not going to tag the ancestors XD

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morganbritton132 · 17 days

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Eddie during a Q&A where he specially asked his fans to ask him questions about his marriage: Oh, just saw the question who proposed to who and-

Steve, loudly off-camera: I proposed to him and he said no!

Eddie: …first of all, you couldn’t even get gay married at the time. And second, I said no because I-

Steve: He said no because he wanted to propose to me and then DIDN’T

Eddie: I did!

Steve: A year later.

Eddie: I had to plan! I had to prep! I wasn’t going to halfass our gay fake wedding!

Eddie: And, just for your information, internet! He’s complaining and he’s making me look bad but do you know what he did? Do you know what he did the next day? I put together this beautiful ceremony with all our friends and family and you know what he did the very next day?

Eddie: He went to the courthouse and married a woman!

Steve: …Well that was for tax benefits

#Steve: Don’t let my marriage distract from you depriving me of having a fiancé! We could’ve been engaged #Steve: Twice you took that from me #Eddie: You were the one that wanted to go to the courthouse immediate once gay marriage was legalized and do the ceremony later #Steve’s been married twice but had never been engaged #I fully believe that if Steve proposed first Eddie would turn him down so he got to do it #He took a year to do it because he was touring and none of their friends were ever in town at the same time #and he’d never admit it but it was amusing to watch Steve’s standards for a proposal drop as time went on #one time Eddie got on his knee to pick up the toothpaste cap he dropped in the bathroom and Steve actually gasped #eddie munson tiktok saga #steve harrington #eddie munson

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camthecatchameleon · 2 months

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a few days ago my brain demanded i draw polywitchlight RIGHT NOW and who am i to refuse

original and closeups under the cut

original/template is from “Go For It Nakamura!” by Syundei which i have not read actually

+ closeups; feel free to use as icons with credit smile

#legends of avantris #once upon a witchlight #torbek #gideon coal #morning frost #kremy lecroux #gricko grimgrin #meme redraw #cw possible eyestrain #polylight #polywitchlight #do i even bother tagging twig hootsie and duke/gorebek if theyre just tiny little guys #obligatory click/open in new tab for better quality.#cmon guys i spent so much time on this #i actually LOOKED AT A REFERENCE???? GASP wow that never happens !!!#anyways i love gricko and his fucking teefers #im realizing that i dont draw torbek as fucked up and sad looking as everyone else does which does make him look inaccurate but shut up #in my heart hes adorable okay

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yutaan · 1 year

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Papercraft Ed! I had the sketch for this one finished a while ago, but for whatever reason didn’t feel quite happy with it. Eventually I tried flipping it to face the opposite way - meaning his automail arm was now facing the viewer and could be shown via rips in his clothes and gloves - and then BAM, I liked how it looked after all! Sometimes it’s the simplest things that make all the difference.

#fullmetal alchemist #edward elric #papercraft #papercutting #paper art #my art #I didn't actually read or watch FMA until 2021 and somehow never had any idea whatsoever what it was actually about #just that it was Good and beloved by many #and like! I was looking forward to it! But buying the whole manga would be pretty expensive #so I kept putting it off #UNTIL!#USED BOOKSTORE TO THE RESCUE ONCE AGAIN!!!#they had the ENTIRE SERIES for a STEAL and I straight-up gasped aloud in the manga aisle #carried everything up to the counter at once like I was weightlifting because WHAT IF I left a volume behind and someone else snagged it #TOO RISKY #and then read the whole series in two days #and. Dear readers you were ALL correct #fma fucking SLAPS

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dinneratgrannys · 7 months

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I've been waiting for you...Emma.

#ouatedit #onceuponatimeedit #merlinedit #once upon a time #ouat #merlin #s5 #5x05 dreamcatcher #character: merlin #event: rewatch 22 #i remember him taking that hood off the first time i watched this and i gasped out loud #i love him okay?

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turbineface · 29 days

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u guise will NEVER guess who my favorite tfa characters are!!!! its IMPOSSIBLE

also drops this vile CREATURE then EXPLODES AND DIES

#transformers animated #tfa #henry masterson #tfa nanosec #nino sexton #maccadams #so sorry gang i post robots ONCE and then its all human brainrot 😞#i cabt help it... on my 50 billionth rewatch my 3rd eye was FORCED open #and then GASP! i can FINALLy see who the best characters in tfa are siigghh #this what autism does to a mf #can u also tell i never draw backgrounds i bet its IMPOSSIBLE to see

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solarisfortuneia · 9 months

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here's a silly something that was going to be a thing of its own but i thought it was much better as a blurb <3

“kaeya,” you call, running your fingers over a midnight blue t-shirt with a cat and the word ‘meowlicious’ embroidered on it in silver. “come take a look at this!”

hearing no response, you turn, only to find kaeya’s hoodie-clad figure next to the hat section, where a wide variety of them sit on display. the trolley sits to the side, abandoned in favor of a ridiculously colored hat that now sits on his head.

“what?” he asks, a twinkle in his eye. “you don’t think i look handsome like this?” he poses like a model on the runway. with his midnight-colored hoodie, white sneakers, silver earrings, eyepatch and rainbow beach hat, he makes for a comedic sight.

the price tag dangles over his eyes, the cherry atop this absurd cake. a smile spreads across your face and laughter bubbles up in your chest.

“you look very handsome,” you tease. “i’d definitely pay—” you reach for the tag and flip it over. “five ninety nine for you.”

“is that all i’m worth?” one hand flies to the center of his chest in feigned astonishment. he catches your wrist with the other when you begin to move away. “i was under the impression that i’m worth far more than a meagre five ninety nine.”

“oh, you are.” you flick his forehead playfully. “but the standard rule of department stores is that i pay what’s on the tag.” you stick your tongue out at him, intertwining your fingers with his.

“touché. it looks like you’ve struck a bargain. take me home, then, my love.”

“we’ve got to pay for our stuff first, my love.”

#—💡#that's the blurb tag i've only used it once before jdshjsd #kaeya x reader #kaeya alberich x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #genshin fluff #genshin x you #genshin impact x you #kaeya x you #le gasp mika posted something?#SDKJSKDJH SORRY GUYS I'VE BEEN WRITING BUT IT'S NOTHING POST-WORTHY #i'll salvage something soon (is that a lie? who knows not me)#and i have two events so i'm working on those too!!#AND YES I REMEMBER THE EVENT REQS I GOT LONG AGO I'LL WRITE THEM EVENTUALLY JSDHJH #anyway that's all for now bye ily #life do be life-ing

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grape-v1nes · 2 months

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sanderlanch? more like my life has been altered permanently and i will struggle to read any other book for as long as i live

#i just finished the way of kings #can you tell?#when was the last time a book made you audibly gasp #not once #not twice #but three times in 250 pages #personally … i don’t think that’s ever happened before today #anyway #next!#words of radiance #YIPPEE #cosmere #brandon sanderson #the way of kings

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werewolfsmile · 21 days

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Watching The Corkscrew Job and just ...

Eliot trusting Parker and Hardison enough to go into a situation where he's about to have no oxygen. He would hear over the comms that they're facing down henchmen who are trying to stop them. He doesn't know how long it'll take for them to get air flow happening again.

But there's an innocent person to protect and he has faith in his partners. Faith enough to willingly risk his life time and time again - not just in this instance, but all the others we see over the course of the show. Because Eliot knows that Parker and Hardison will do whatever it takes to protect him, just as he protects them.

There's just something so profound about not even having enough air to draw breath - but it doesn't matter, because you know your partners are out there, fighting to get that next breath to you. And it might take longer than expected. It might not go smoothly, hell, it might not even work at all. But it doesn't matter because your faith in these people is greater than the instincts screaming for oxygen.

Eliot can't breathe without them. But he's used to that - he's been living this way for years already. So he holds his breath and trusts.