#fuck lehrer (again)

[hqlmesbqry]

I'll be having a good day until I remember that Noam Álvaro and Dara Shirazi were only 17 and 19 when they had to commit war crimes for their shitty abusive mentor.

#the fever king #the electric heir #fuck lehrer (again)

[brucewaynehater101]

What music genres do you think the batfam members listen to?I ask this because of how little Alternative music fan headcannons there are. I personally think Tim enjoys grunge and or nu metal(Specifically bands like limp Bizkit, Linkin Park, Korn, and System of a Down)

I'm not too familiar with genres, so I'll be giving this my best shot. I typically listen to music by the vibe it gives. My playlists include music that makes my brain go brr (the nice dissociation), songs for muses, ones to scandalize my mother, music a garage band would play, songs that make God fear me, and a long playlist for pleasant company.

Anyways, I've seen a few fics where people say that Bruce and Tim share a love of those genres. I could definitely see Tim listening to the ones you mentioned. He probably plays it through his preferred headphones as he fixes electronics, codes, or plots destruction. He also, because he suppresses his anger a lot, probably listens to music like Ghostemane, Kim Dracula, and Freddie Dredd.

Jason definitely enjoys musicals. Dick as well, but Jason isn't as vocal about it. Instead, Jason will listen to 80's rock and 2000's girl bands if others around (he ofc listens to TLC).

I like to think that they all enjoy music in different languages. For Dick and Damian, they especially like music they grew up listening to in their respective cultures. The others, because the batfam is multilingual, just enjoy all kinds of different tunes in multiple languages. The batfam playlist, especially for hanging out in the cave, is chaotic. Bruce nearly had an aneurysm the first time he heard Touch You (Yarichin Bitch Club) over the speakers. The only reason the kids didn't get in trouble was because Damian was out with Colin at the time.

I hc that Cass likes lofi hip hop music. She typically enjoys all songs but prefers those without words (because understanding words still requires energy from her and can prevent her from fully relaxing). She does listen to a lot of classical music, a passion she shares with Alfred.

Alfred, the man the myth the legend, enjoys swing music the most. He'll put on a variety of music in the kitchen (different classical eras, opera music, the occasional musical, jazz, some more modern instrumental music, and some movie background tracks), but the whole fam knowns he's in a really good mood if swing music is playing.

Bruce is the type of person to just listen to what's on. Unless he dislikes the music, he will be fine with whatever his kids or Alfred have playing. He particularly enjoys alternative rock and old country music (like Garth Brooks), but he doesn't usually fight for the aux cord.

Barbara has playlists depending on her mood. Birds of Prey mission prep? Bruce being a dick? Dick being a dick? Batfam drama she has to once again intervene in? Coding nights? Can't get out of bed days? She also has a few playlists for each person she regularly interacts with. For calm or bad nights, she'll put the playlist in that person's comm. She also likes to hack speakers around Bruce and play her revenge music when he's being a petty asshole. Some of her revenge music includes "They're Coming to Take Me Away" by Sloppy Jane, "OoOo1" by galen tipton, "All I see is Poop" by Hobo Johnson, "I Swallowed Shampoo" by Soupy Garage Juice, "I am now going to bark at you" by thquib, and "I hope You Die in a Fire" by Grand Commander.

Duke is most definitely a Mitski, Hozier, Crane Wives enjoyer, and you can pry that hc from my cold, dead hands. He probably also likes songs similar to "Ancapistan" by Jreg or "The Fine Print" by The Stupendium.

Dick's music is either super high in energy or sad as fuck. He loves the songs "Has Anbody Seen My Will to Live" by The Tin Knees and "Copacabana (At the Copa)" by Barry Manilow because they are both sad and happy :) I hc that he likes songs by TV Girl, Yot Club, Joji, and Cosmo Sheldrake. He also has a few playlists he follows of Zumba music. The song "The Masochism Tango" by Tom Lehrer is one of his favorites.

This is already a pretty long post, so feel free to reblog with more ideas! I didn't get to Steph or more in depth with Damian :(

#dc comics #duke thomas #dc universe #tim drake #jason todd #bruce wayne #dick grayson #damian wayne #barbara gordon #alfred pennyworth #yes i do listen to every song and band I've mentioned regularly and for enjoyment #thank you for the ask!!!! #i will probably add damian and steph later #ignore any bad writings with this one cause I'm currently at work while writing it

[swoonbots]

Welcome Home Ideas & Prompts Based On Songs

CW: Suggestive but not explicit talk

A/N: Again, more ideas I may not get to, so I'm writing them down to document them. Would be willing to write if requested. You can use them but tag me so I can read it :eyes:

-----

Christmas Kids by Roar

Story about a trans!male!reader and a well loved Wally plush that takes them to his world. (willingly)

Inspired by these specific lyrics and nothing else lmaoo: "Change your name, change your mind, and leave this fucked up place behind. But I'll Know, I'll Know."

Sex With A Ghost by Teddy Hyde

Real World Reader that "hallucinates" and has relations with their fake childhood best friend, Wally. They both yearn to be with each other, but can't figure out how to get to each other.

Honey, I'm Home by GHOST

Wally has the worst time of his life lmaooo. But seriously, while I don't have a solid idea -> this song has sooo much potential for a wally fic. I just know it.

The Masochism Tango by Tom Lehrer

A head over heels puppet (could be anyone tbh) who falls for villain!reader.

A worshipping puppet who is so in love with reader they're willing to let them hurt them

The Whole World and You by Tally Hall

Wally Darling gets jealous of the new human neighbor's popularity. ( He gets over it)

OR.

A new puppet joins the show and is so popular that Wally fears getting replaced. So he desperately tries to please this new puppet and make it so they're a duo

Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy by Queen

Head over heels puppet pal. (Thinking maybe howdy or Eddie) who's in love in a really goofy cartoon way. Think tripping over feet, hearts in eyes, getting reduced to stutters whenever they see you.

Meanwhile the rest of the cast cheers them on.

Let's Face It, I'm Cute! by 11 Acorn Lane

Wally Darling is cute and gets whatever he wants

Puppy Princess by Hot Freaks

Inspired by the main chorus

A Barnaby X Reader for once. Barnaby loves the reader, but fears he is only the 'funny friend's to them and can't be seen as a love interest

Body Terror Song by AJJ

Any comforting a human reader who feels body dysphoria. Might be led on by them not being a puppet

Mirror Man by Jack Stauber

Inspired by the lyrics, "Crafting the world it's next new savior."

Wally understands that his time in welcome home is coming to an end. So he begins to create new puppet pals to be the next generation.

#welcome home #welcome home x reader #wally darling x reader

[ballburster]

fuck it KOROSENSEI HEADCANONS:

He hates meeting new people, so Karasuma has to convince to go to any event that has anyone that he doesn't know yet. I imagine their conversations goes like this:

Korosensei: "Are we UTTERLY, ABSOLUTELY, OBLIGATED to go?! *curled up in a corner and on the verge of crying*"

Karasuma: "....I am so done with you."

He uses fancy words occasionally in his sentences, making him sound like a grandpa at times

Occasionally throws in fun facts in the middle of his lessons; he'll be teaching the students biology before trailing off and going "hey did you guys know that..." and all the students collectively groan in unison

He stress eats or stress chews, so Irina bought him a teething toy so he won't bite everything and leave his saliva again

He likes both men and women, which mean he's bisexual

Not much of a big spoon, but he just loves cuddling in general so he doesn't really care

When he eats hotpot, he just straight up eats the ingredients raw because he's too impatient to wait

REALLY weird music taste, ranging somewhere between Tom Lehrer and Kim Petras

He's a hermaphrodite, which for some reason he is REALLY embarrased about???

When he finds a new thing (a bug, type of plant or fish, etc.) his immediate thought is either 'kill it' or 'eat it'

Since his canon height is 3 meters but sometimes gets depicted as smaller then that so I like to think that he transfers his height to the length of his tentacles so he can go through buildings easier

He can rearrange his tentacles to ANYWHERE on his body, like he can move a few tentacles to his back so he has some more helping 'hands'

Whenever he's at some sort of fancy gathering, Karasuma always get wine; Irina gets champagne and before Korosensei could even open his mouth to order, Irina immediantly orders him a glass of milk (which he always pretends to be offended by)

Irina and Karasuma are like a sugar mommy and sugar daddy to Korosensei

Karasuma likes mainly the 'classics' (which when asked to elaborate he will REFUSE) and '60s rock

(I wonder if people will bash out on me for saying Karasuma likes country)

The three of them all are dumbasses, Karasuma is one too except he pretends to understand

Irina likes those girlboss female power artists like nicki minaj

Irina (ofc) takes selfies ALL the time, she even takes selfies while shes teaching

#korosensei #korosensei headcanons #assassination classroom #korosensei brain rot #ansatsu kyoushitsu #karasuma tadaomi #irina jelavic

[cordycepsfem]

Pageboy Readthrough, Part Twelve

Hello, hi, I'm the problem - it's me. I haven't been as diligent in reading this nightmare of a memoir recently because life has been entirely too busy. But I slept well last night and just learned that my plans for the evening are canceled so I thought I'd hop back in for a little bit - at least until I can't take it anymore.

All the previous parts of this readthrough can be found here.

Previously

EP dates a woman and they are very closeted

eventually this leads to their relationship ending

EP uses the word "euphoria" which I hate

EP gets almost high off writing about wearing swim trunks once when she was a kid

EP writes about a gay man in a way that would make me consider punching someone were I that gay man

and there was gratuitous use of the word "queer" to describe people who were, at least at the time of the events in the book, not "queer," as one was EP as a girl and the other was some kid's brother she knew, who might have been gay and who might have just been effeminate... and upon rereading this the only reason she did this was because he was wearing a Speedo?

your writer hates that with a burning passion and once again pled for EP to stop retroactively assigning "queer" to people for the sake of a memoir (RAQ for short)

Now

Chapter Seventeen

we start off with EP making plans to tell off her stepmother and her father for harassing her when she next goes home

your writer supports this

she never does it

instead her father comes to visit her in LA

he tells her he wants to talk about something that happened when she was a kid

this makes her nervous

instead of apologizing for the way he and her stepmother treated her, he instead says that he's sorry for causing her any stress by leaving EP's mom, but he knows he wouldn't have had the amazing relationship he has with Linda

this is devastating to EP

damn straight, fuck Linda

EP tells her dad she has to go to therapy and leaves early

she gets in a fender-bender on the way there

this is a completely normal response to talking to a parent and is not horrifying at all

Jesus fuck woman

thankfully the chapter ends here, with EP telling us that it would take years before she eventually says something (can't wait to read that part and I actually mean that, it's not sarcasm)

Chapter Eighteen

at age 12 EP decides that no matter what, acting will be her future

she makes friends with a weird kid named Jack who helps her work on her lines and makes videos to send out for auditions

they also play games and form the Pigeon Party

what's that, you ask?

whenever I hear about pigeons it just reminds me of the great Tom Lehrer song, "Poisoning Pigeons in the Park," and not enough people know about that, so here it is for your listening pleasure; Tom Lehrer is a genius and if you take nothing else away from my readthrough of this badly-written memoir, please take away a love for Tom Lehrer's hilarious songs

moving right along, EP's friends tell her that she would be cooler if she didn't hang out with Jack

but like a good friend EP sticks with Jack, even though he's weird and kids hate him (A+ work, EP)

EP goes off to Saskatchewan to film a movie and enjoys it

she meets a guy named Mark and they become friends

they share some of the same pressures and the same hidden emotional issues

EP writes that eventually she drifted away from Jack, annoyingly because her tastes become more mature, which caused your writer to roll her eyes (but just a little)

she meets up with Jack again when they're in their twenties, but frustratingly, writes nothing about how the meet-up goes, just about where Jack was living at the time

and your writer once again is abhorred by how terribly this is all written and surrenders

#ellie's ep posting #pageboy readthrough #radblr #radical feminism #terfs do touch #terfblr #gender critical #Youtube

[carry-on-my-wayward-gays]

hey I've got another song rec! My friend really likes this band and I know you like heavy shit, so try Dancing With The Dead by Powerwolf!

Along with two others :]

Almost Human - Aurelio Voltaire

and Masochism Tango by Tom Lehrer(it's funny I promise <3)

Dancing with the Dead

couldn’t listen all the way through | not my thing | it’s okay | kinda catchy | ok i really like this | downloading immediately | already in my library

OH MY GOD???? DUDE THIS IS PERFECT. HOLY SHIT THE GUY'S VOICE AND THAT GUITAR AT THE 2:30-44 MARK?? That did unimaginable things to my brain good fucking lord I had to listen to it twice 11/10

Almost Human

couldn’t listen all the way through | not my thing | it’s okay | kinda catchy | ok i really like this | downloading immediately | already in my library

Oh this dude again :D I like him already. It's a good song! Doesn't quite rustle my jimmies but I'd sing this in the shower 9/10

The Masochism Tango

couldn’t listen all the way through | not my thing | it’s okay | kinda catchy | ok i really like this | downloading immediately | already in my library

Ok I know I KNOW but this actually fucks. Like it FUCKS fucks. I genuinely adore this song and I'd listen to it again just for funsies 10/10

#should i make an answer tag? #roxie-roo #ask game!

[senor-plume]

Tom Lehrer

your bondage pigeons and smut crusades have knocked me out since I first sneaked your lps away from my fathers collection and hid them among my own

I played them when the sun went down in my pitch black bedroom (with just the red light from my record player shining) and as my parents snored... I laughed into my pillowcase with grossly oversized headphones perched on my preteen noggin

Im playing you again tonight and I am back on Livingston Street 11 years of age without a real care in the world

(Now if only I can find my The Outsiders book I may shrink and have this beard grow inward back into my head)

as every fool played the Grease soundtrack I was with you laughing

growing up knowing I had a gem in my pocket that none of my peers had made me fell....

well

pretty damned speacial

and with your horrible voice in the background bouncing off my walls I thank you

tonight

you taught me a very good lesson

if you want to be serious if you want to say fuck you

do it with humor

make them laugh as you apply your knee to their groin

#TUMBLR POETRY #Tom Lehrer #poetry

[spacedykez]

songs that remind me of my blorbos, tma edition: Crow Goes Through Xyr Music Library And Assigns Songs Based 100% On Vibes

most of these are not 100% accurate but listen they are accurate in my heart and thats what matters (why did i do this? i got bored thats why)

jonathan j. jarchivist sims I Talk In My Sleep (Crane Wives) creature (half-alive) Brave As a Noun (AJJ) Oh My God (Alec Benjamin) My Demons (STARSET) [ft. jmart] Don't Wanna Be (The Score) The Fear (The Score) Who I Am (The Score) Achilles Come Down (Gang Of Youths) Rät (Penelope Scott) Overwhelmed (Royal & the Serpent) [we all project onto him shut up] Lotta True Crime (Penelope Scott) [heh. heh.] Mama's Gun (Glass Animals) Gasoline (Halsey)

martin k. blackwood Cold Is The Night (the oh hellos) Welcome Home (derivakat)

jmart The Killing Kind (mariana's trench) Curses (Crane Wives) See You Again (Wiz Kalifa) Take You Down (ILLENIUM) Hello My Old Heart (The Oh Hellos) Little Talks (Of Monsters and Men) Mr Loverman (Ricky Montgomery) [post mag200 ;)] Waiting For Love (Avicii) On And On (The Score) Don't You Dare Forget the Sun (Get Scared) [Martin singing 2 Jon]

tma in general everybody wants to rule the world (lorde) house of memories (p!atd) soldiers (rachel platten) [fits the ending of tma] discord (the living tombstone) [the eyepocalypse] the nights (avicii) weight of the world (shayfer james) [its the entities. trust me] happy face (jagwar twin)

extremely fucking specific scenarios that fit none of the above Rule #4 - Fish Inside A Birdcage [s1, Jon is singing it, Elias is "[his] brother always singing [him] songs." martin is his brother "carrying him from these walls and showing him the world outside." listen. LISTEN. do u. do u get me.]

the entities [Spiral] I Can't Decide (Scissor Sisters) [Spiral] Kiss Your Dreams Goodbye (Derivakat) [Spiral] Wires (The Neigborhood) [Spiral] In My Head (Derivakat) [Spiral] Teeth (5SOS) [Web] Chess Board (Amanda Fagan) [Hunt] Animals (Maroon 5) [THIS ONES ACTUALLY ACCURATE] [Hunt] Revolution (The Score) [Stranger] Wolf In Sheep's Clothing (Set It Off) [Stranger] Strange (The Score) [Stranger] Kill The Lights (Set It Off) [Lonely] Mind Is A Prison (Alec Benjamin) [Lonely] Let Me Down Slowly (Alec Benjamin) [Flesh] Masochism Tango (Tom Lehrer) [Flesh] Body (Mother Mother) [Desolation] Fireborn (Derivakat) [Desolation] Play With Fire (Sam Tinnesz) [Desolation] Choke (IDKHOWBUTTHEYFOUNDME) [Desolation] Arsonist's Lullaby

[Slaughter] You're Gonna Go Far, Kid (The Offspring)

[End] Another One Bites The Dust (Queen)

ELIAS MOTHERFUCKING BOUCHARD RAT BASTARD AVATAR OF THE WHORE. How Bad Can I Be (The Lorax) Be Prepared (Lion King) Oh No (Mariana and the Diamonds) you should see me in a crown (Billie Eilish) Can I Get A Witness (SonReal) Feeling Good (Micheal Buble) People I Don't Like (UPSAHL)

#tma spoilers #the otter splashes

[locke-writes]

they sprout among the peonies - Michael Anania

Fruit Salad - Tom Cardy

The Violet Hour - Sea Wolf

Simple Little Things - Audra McDonald

3 Small Words - Josie and the Pussycats

The Proposal - Marla Schaffel & James Barbour

Love, Me Normally - Will Wood

If It Makes You Happy - Michael Cera Palin

Come Along - Cosmo Sheldrake

when i’m at therapy - The Blue Dinosaur

Tardigrade Song - Cosmo Sheldrake

Boyfriend - Dove Cameron

Jigsaw - Conan Gray

Spy Again - Curt Mega

Celebrate the Reckless - MAGIC GIANT

The Railroad - Goodnight, Texas

Me Myself & I - 5 Seconds of Summer

Fever Dreams - Dio

History - BONNIE PARKER

Hey Love - The Daughters of Eve

Greek God - Conan Gray

Cubs in Five - The Mountain Goats

It’s Cool - First in Flight

Welcome to the Family - Avenged Sevenfold

Kiss Me - Sixpence None the Richer

What’s Up? - 4 Non Blondes

There She Goes - The La’s

There She Goes - Sixpence None the Richer

I Don’t Want to Wait - Paula Cole

She’s So High - Tai Bachman

Tom’s Diner - Suzanne Vega & DNA

Mr Jones - Counting Crows

Crash Into Me - Dave Matthews Band

Collide - Howie Day

Lovefool - The Cardigans

Barely Breathing - Duncan Sheik

3AM - Matchbox Twenty

I Hate Everything About You - Three Days Grace

Still Ill - The Smiths

Somewhere Out There - Philip Glasser & Betsy Cathcart

My Eyes - Neil Patrick Harris & Felicia Day

The Starry Night - Starry Original Cast

Finale - Anastasia Original Broadway Cast

Keys of Life - Klaus Nomi

A Duo - Philip Glasser & Dom De Louise

It’s DeLovely - Ella Fitzgerald

Kids In America - The Muffs

867-5309/Jenny - Tommy Tutone

Fake - Oxford Remedy

Flowers Never Bend After the Rainfall - Simon & Garfunkel

You’re Dead - Norma Tanega

Nevermind - Deaf Havana

The Bad Thing - The Mysterines

If I Fail You - Dylan Saunders

Vampire Money - My Chemical Romance

Poisoning Pigeons in the Park - Tom Lehrer

Viva Las Vengeance - Panic! At the Disco

Holidays in the Sun - Sex Pistols

Let It Out - The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals Cast

Inner White Girl - A Strange Loop Cast

I Love You (As Much As Someone Like Me Could Love Anyone) - Galavant Cast

Pretend to Be Nice - Josie and the Pussycats

Teenage Demon Baby - Foxy Shazam

Flightless Bird, American Mouth - Iron & Wine

When We’re Older - James Blake

Washing Machine Heart - Mitski

You Don’t Own Me - Klaus Nomi

Lightning Strikes - Klaus Nomi

Crying Is Cool - The Sonder Bombs

Redwood Reverie - Plas Teg

Go Home. Play Music. Feel Better - Michael Cera Palin

Lemon Lime Lips - Naethan Apollo

Seventeen - MARINA

Totally Fucked - Spring Awakening Cast

Along the Way - The Hunts

Istanbul (Not Constantinople) - The Four Lads

Ballroom Blitz - Sweet

Davy Crochet - The Backseat Lovers

Mother Mary - Foxboro Hottubs 

Soup is Good Food - Dead Kennedys

Valentine - The Hunts

This Time Tomorrow - Brandi Carlile

Sofia - Clairo

Oh Ana - Mother Mother

Kill the Sun - Motherfolk

One Step Ahead - Joey Richter & Curt Mega

Your Stupid Face - Kaden MacKay

This Side of Me - Toddy Walters

i had gay sex with god (it could’ve gone better) - Juno Lev

Listen on Spotify

#spotify playlist #monthly playlist #june playlist

[dreamland-creations]

Since for some reason the only song from Tom lehrer I see people listening too is the masochism tango I am here to present to you all a few of my favorite other songs from him cause people only listening to the masochism tango is a fucking crime to me.

Coming up first is one of my absolute favorites : poisoning pigeons in the park! It's a wonderful song about fun spring time activities you can do with your partner during this flowery season!!!

Number two which is a song helping everyone to cope with grief and the fear of leaving your loved ones behind Called we will all go together when we go

Number three is perfect when you are sad cause either you or someone you care about is getting send off to fight in the trenches:'(((

Presenting it makes a fellow proud to be a soldier

I guarantee it will bring your spirits up when you have to learn how to fire a new M-1.

And last for this post is perfect if you want to be reminded that even if you graduated you will never escape mathematics!

Presenting once again a song That's mathematics

#I have more but I think that's enough #For now #tom lehrer #Who would have ever thought I would be obsessing over a probably dead mathmetican who probably most didn't been hear of- #No hello puppets content again sorry- #Enjoy my terrible taste in music ~~~ #Youtube

[daxwritesstories]

Cyra College AU Part 12: Goin' Down

Scene 1: Masochism Tango

(Scene title by Tom Lehrer)

INT. Library - Morning

Ace is sitting alone at one of the tables. He's reading a textbook.

Cyra appears seemingly out of nowhere and pulls out the chair next to Ace. He notices her but doesn't give her more than a quick glance. Cyra sits down and stares at him, waiting for acknowledgement. When he doesn't give her any, Cyra greets him.

CYRA: Hi.

ACE: I'm surprised you still want to talk to me.

CYRA: Well, I'm still pretty mad at you.

ACE: Okay.

CYRA: Why'd you do it anyway? Was it just to piss me off?

Ace sighs and flips the page in his textbook. Cyra watches his fingers delicately move the page.

ACE: There were a lot of reasons why I did it. Your friend is cute and she seemed easy. Primal urges and all that. I'm still a man, you know.

CYRA: You believe in that kind of thing?

ACE: You're naive if you don't.

Cyra rolls her eyes.

ACE: I also did it because I can do whatever the fuck I want. Have you ever heard of pretty privilege?

CYRA: Yeah. I have pretty privilege too.

Ace laughs.

ACE: You're nowhere near my level. People just put up with your bullshit because you're rich and have a nice body that you know how to use. That face though... Woof.

Cyra's jaw drops.

CYRA: Ugh, you're–

ACE: And don't even try to call me mean because I can tell you're getting turned on.

Cyra's eyes widen in shock and she glances around to see if anyone's eavesdropping. She then leans in closer to Ace and lowers her voice.

CYRA: How the fuck did you–

ACE: You get this look in your eyes. That's how I can tell. I saw it when I was... How did you put it? Politely telling you to go away. At first I didn't know what it was or why you were looking at me like that. But after doing some thinking, I figured that you must like the way I treat you, or else you would've left me alone by now.

Ace goes back to reading his textbook. Cyra stares down at the table, absolutely floored by what she just heard.

After a long moment of silence, Cyra speaks again in a slightly shaky voice.

CYRA: You were... thinking about me?

Ace raises an eyebrow and looks at Cyra again. Cyra just stares at him, looking uncharacteristically shy. Ace sighs and rolls his eyes before closing his textbook. He slides the book in his bag and then abruptly stands up. He grabs Cyra's arm and pulls her out of her chair.

ACE: Come with me.

Cyra winces in pain as Ace drags her out of the library.

CYRA: Ow! Where are we going?

ACE: Somewhere private.

Scene 2: Goin' Down

(Scene title by The Pretty Reckless)

INT. Boy's dorm lobby - Morning

Ace drags Cyra through the front doors and they quickly make their way through the lobby.

CYRA: Ow! You're gonna rip my fucking arm out!

ACE: Walk faster then.

They walk past Jayce and Prince, who are on their way out of the building. Jayce and Prince both stop to look, confused by seeing their friend rush past them. The two then look at each other and shrug.

INT. Boy's dorm hallway - Morning

Ace pulls Cyra down the hallway towards his dorm. His pace is fast and Cyra stumbles as she tries to keep up.

When they reach Ace's dorm, he quickly unlocks the door and pulls Cyra inside.

INT. Ace & Zayn's dorm - Morning

Ace pushes Cyra further into the room, finally letting go of her arm. He closes the door behind them as Cyra rubs her arm.

CYRA: That hurt.

Ace drops his bag on the floor and leans against the door. Cyra gives him a confused look.

CYRA: Um... Why did you bring me here?

Ace gestures at Cyra with his finger.

ACE: Come here.

Cyra's expression changes from confusion to fear. She obeys though, taking a few cautious steps closer to Ace.

As soon as she's close enough, Ace puts his hands on Cyra's shoulders and roughly pushes her down to her knees. Cyra is too surprised to react, left dumbfounded on the floor. She blinks a couple of times and then looks up at Ace.

CYRA: What are you doing?

ACE: You want my attention so bad? Fine.

Ace starts undoing the belt on his short-shorts. Cyra's eyes widen when she realizes what he's doing.

ACE: Here's your opportunity.

Ace finishes undoing the belt and unbuttons the shorts.

ACE: Impress me.

Cyra stares up at Ace with a mix of disbelief and excitement in her eyes.

INT. Boys dorm hallway - Morning

We cut to some time later. The door to Ace's dorm opens and Ace pushes Cyra out into the hallway. They are both giggling.

ACE: Okay, get the fuck out of here.

CYRA (playfully): You aren't even gonna tell me how I did?

ACE: I'll text you about it, bitch. Now get lost!

Ace giggles and closes the door.

Cyra looks back at the door for a moment. She then smiles widely and spins around. She fist pumps and whispers to herself in celebration.

CYRA (whispering): Fuck yes!

Cyra jumps around in circles a couple of times to get the excitement out of her system before she goes running down the hall.

Scene 3: Bite Me

(Scene title by Avril Lavigne)

INT. Music classroom - Morning

Cyra rushes into the classroom to where Drew is sitting.

CYRA: Yooo!

DREW: Hey!

Cyra wraps her arms around Drew from behind his chair. She kisses the top of his head.

CYRA: Mwah! Where's your prof?

DREW: I'm sure he'll be here in a sec. Why?

Just then, Roman walks into the room.

ROMAN: Alright everyone, we're gonna be finishing going over the slides from last class.

CYRA (yelling): Yo, Roman!

Roman stops in his tracks when he hears Cyra. He looks in her direction, confused.

CYRA: I came to let you know that you're a stupid idiot who is wrong! Ohhh shit! How does it feel to be so fucking wrong?

Roman responds in a calm tone.

ROMAN: What are you talking about?

CYRA: I believe you said that I would never get what I wanted out of this whole thing. But guess what, bitch? You were wrong! With a capital fucking W! Idiot!

Cyra starts prancing towards the door, loudly laughing.

ROMAN: Cyra, can I ask you something?

Cyra spins around in the aisle and holds both her middle fingers in the air. She walks backwards up the stairs as she speaks.

CYRA: No, but you can suck my fat fuckin' dick!

Roman just stands there with a shocked but amused look on his face as Cyra turns around again and walks out of the room. All the students are staring at her as she leaves.

Cyra can still be heard in the hallway after the door closes behind her.

CYRA (through the door): Woooooo!

Drew laughs and looks at Roman, who is still just standing there, dumbfounded.

DREW: Why's she mad at you?

ROMAN: Uh... I don't think she's mad anymore.

Roman smirks to himself and walks over to his desk.

Scene 4: Sorry, Not Sorry

(Scene title by Mayday Parade)

INT. Erik & Rhett's dorm - Afternoon

Erik is practicing guitar on his bed. Rhett comes out of the bathroom, drying his hair with a towel. He sits down on his bed and sighs.

RHETT: The show's tomorrow night.

ERIK: I know.

RHETT: You need to talk to Cyra.

ERIK: I already did. She just wanted to fight.

RHETT: We haven't even decided on our set list yet.

ERIK: We'll just do the usual one.

RHETT: You mean all the songs that we haven't practiced with Cyra?

ERIK: Yeah. We'll just fuckin' do the show without her.

RHETT: You're really gonna kick her out just because you had one fight with her.

ERIK: It's not because of the fight, it's because of how she tried to get back at me. That, and everything about her pisses me off. We don't need her in this band.

RHETT: She didn't do that to get back at you. We fucked because we were finally left alone together.

ERIK: You seriously don't think she was just using you to make me mad?

RHETT: No, I don't. And even if she was, I wouldn't give a shit.

ERIK: You should care.

RHETT: If a hot girl is grinding against me and asking me to fuck her, I'm gonna do it. Sorry that you feel differently.

Erik rolls his eyes.

ERIK: If she wants to be in the show tomorrow, then she can come talk to me. I'm not gonna be the one chasing her down.

Rhett doesn't say anything.

#cyra college au #cyra’s world #screenplay #creative writing #band drama #lgbt writers

[promiseimnotacop]

i literally only just realised one of the common themes between an awful lot of songs i really like is that they are patter songs

#original #the amanda palmer > mother mother > everything everything > tom lehrer > sondheim > #connection finally makes sense #but also this seems fucking obvious and i can't believe it took me this long to realise #anyway i've been teaching myself not getting married from company and i know it all but i still miss a couple lines or go out of synch and #mumble more than i should #so i went and looked up some others and learnt my master is punctual #(because i acted in box and cox in gcse drama. not the g&s but the original farce) #i rlly like patter it's very satisfying #i'm not good at it but i like it #i can do the double time bit from smell of rebellion #i can nearly do not getting married #i can do runs in the family i think #when i first got super into sweeney todd one of the songs i came back to again and again was 'kiss me' #cos i fuckin love patter #so much so that in our family we sometimes say 'it's a gate it's a gate we don't have a gate' often to describe someone gettin into a flap

[esperantoauthor]

In honor of the stream of people in the white house now coming down positive with covid-19:

🎵I love my friends and they love me We're just as close as we can be And just because we really care Whatever we get we share

...And if you will be my friend, then I might, mind you, I said might Give it to you! 🎵

“I Got it From Agnes” by Tom Lehrer

#america the fucked #tom lehrer #not glee #quarantine mood #musical comedy #i got it from agnes #apparently this was blowing up again because of covid but I just finally made the connection #late to the game #but who cares #things I know too much about becuase my brother was obsessed with them

[fagboysupreme]

okay im attempting again to post my

RDR2 Modern AU Music Taste Headcanons

and if this crashes tumblr again i’ll be upset beyond belief

Arthur: Honestly enjoys whatever’s popular at any given time, but has a deep love for country classics. Johnny Cash in regular rotation.

John: 2000′s emo shit, grunge and Vocaloid. probably wanted to look just like Machigerita-P at some point. (ditto, honestly.)

Abigail: 80′s chick music and riotgrrl rock. Very fervent enjoyer of all things Cyndi Lauper, Stevie Nicks and Courtney Love.

Dutch: the most godawful mix of incel indie and RYMcore post-rock. ever wanted to hear a constant rotation of Swans and Weezer?

Hosea: showtunes and comedy music. big fan of Weird Al, Bo Burnham and ESPECIALLY Tom Lehrer. adores the original Cats soundtrack.

Micah: hideously tryhard noise music that he moreso enjoys tormenting others with. this guy will play Whitehouse on any and all first dates.

Charles: his autism is anti-loud noise flavor, so he errs towards ambient chill pop stuff like Animal Collective and Beach House. (the kind of thing i hate sorry charles)

Sadie: any and all country songs about killing or inconveniencing your husband. also Paramore.

Bill: bro-country. got tricked into listening to Ram Ranch once and cried for three hours.

Javier: gives me metalhead vibes but also the only artists I think he really cares about are Gorillaz and Arca and i cant explain why

Lenny: probably enjoys most things. i think he likes late 90′s conscious rap like De La Soul and A Tribe Called Quest a lot tho

Sean: goofy boy rock bands like Tub Ring and The Presidents of the United States mixed in with the most awful 2000′s trash rock that he pirates

Kieran: white gay twink indie like Car Seat Headrest, Cavetown and a little bit of Jack Stauber

Mary-Beth: unironically, movie soundtracks. this the kind of girl who sits around listening to the LotR score like a dork.

Tilly: any and all mainstream 60′s-70′s music no matter how lame or dorky. absolutely adores the really early boy band era of the Beatles.

Karen: rave music, hyperpop, breakcore, basically anything that’d cause a victorian child to explode.

Uncle: his playlist is just a russian roulette game, most of the time you’ll get prog rock and sometimes you’ll get Jimmy Buffett and it’s pretty much a crapshoot.

Grimshaw: mostly likes jazz, is usually too busy to listen to any music and if you asked her her favorite artist she’d shrug and say “leonardo da vinci i guess”

Swanson: enjoys metal and punk, is basically just that one joke that was in every ad for Monsters University. (you know the one)

Strauss: Field recordings of people screaming. nah but fr i dont think he actually gets much out of listening to music. classical maybe. hes old.

Pearson: old-timey folk songs and sea shanties. big fan of The Pogues as well. Javier told him about Scottish pirate metal once... big mistake.

Molly: mid-2010′s tumblrcore girl pop. every argument with Dutch is usually book-ended by relistening to “Cry Baby” or “Norman Fucking Rockwell” again

Jack: fucking baby shark or some shit idk hes four years old

Trelawny: 90′s and 2000′s r&b and pop. this man WILL scam you and then go home and listen to TLC.

#rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #rdr2 headcanons #rdr2 modern au #arthur morgan #john marston #abigail roberts #dutch van der linde #hosea matthews #micah bell #charles smith #sadie adler #bill williamson #javier escuella #lenny summers #sean macguire #kieran duffy #mary beth gaskill #tilly jackson #karen jones #uncle #susan grimshaw #reverend swanson #leopold strauss #simon pearson #molly o'shea #jack marston #josiah trelawny

[francium-hydroxide]

I'm bored so here's some songs that give of c!tntduo vibes

+ lyrics that i think relate to them the most

(in case u wanna set the mood when writing your fanfics or just have it in the background as you maladaptive daydream)

//the lyrics are pretty violent

1) Love Me Dead- Ludo

"kill me romantically",

"bitter and dumb you're my sugarplum"

"you're awful, i love you!"

"you're a parasitic, psycho, filthy creature finger-bangin' my heart"

2) Cirque- Sub Urban

"don't need to be in love to have a little romance"

"you know you sound cocky as fuck, but go ahead and try your fucking luck"

"we can fall in love, or we can go insane, we can play it rough or we can play it safe"

3) The Masochism Tango- Tom Lehrer

"your heart is hard as stone or mahogany. that's why i'm in such exquisite agony."

"so, darling, if you smell something burning, it's my heart"

"take your cigarette from its holder, and burn your initials in my shoulder."

"fracture my spine,and swear that you're mine."

4) Choke- IDKHBTFM

"i wouldn't hesitate, to smile while you suffocate and die"

"and lock the fire escapes, ill break your pretty face"

"you get everything you want,and money always talks to the idiots savants"

5) I Can't Decide- Scissor Sisters

"its a bitch convincing people to like you"

"oh I won't deny I'll miss you when you're gone

"don't wanna be a bad guy, I'm just a loner baby, now you've got in my way"

6) Crazy=Genius- Panic! At The Disco

(don't really like brandon urie but i consider p!atd & brandon as two different beings considering he didn't come up with the name+ i highly doubt he wrote the song himself)

"other boys you dated may have serrated your heart with a slice, but the cut of your love never hurts baby its a sweet butter knife"

"if crazy equals genius, then im a fucking arsonist"

"there's no residue of a torturer inside of your eyes"

7) My Boy & All The Good Girls Go To Hell- Billie Eilish

(again not the biggest billie fan considering the controversies,but damn do her songs fucking slap)

"my boy's an ugly crier, but he's such a pretty liar"

"look at you,needing me, you know im not your friend without some greenery"

"begging for our help,wow!"

8) I Never Told You What I Did For A Living- My Chemical Romance

(not really related, i just like how the song sounds)

"touched by angels, though I fall out of grace,I did it all so maybe I'd live this every day."

"clean me off, im so dirty babe, the kind of dirty where the water never cleans off the clothes"

"they gave us two shots to the back of the head, and we're all dead now"

#tntduo #i might do a part two if y'all want one #if you can't tell my brain has been fixating on the two of them #quackity #wilbur soot #tntblr #dream smp

[wonderlandleighleigh]

Yunno, what with all your excellent headcanons and fics/extensive knowledge on the topic, I can't help but wonder: who's your fave comedian(s) and why? : D

THIS IS A VERY COMPLICATED QUESTION!

I just really love comedy in general, and I love to laugh at stuff, so it's hard to pick just one.

I love musical comedians. I think Bo Burnham is so, so good. I'm a huge Tom Lehrer fan, too.

There's the classic dirty guys like Richard Pryor and before him Lenny Bruce. It's funny, because we were splitting up my dad's vinyl albums and we found Richard Pryor's album That ****** is Crazy. My older brother's reaction was to literally jump back like "NO!" but I was like "HECK YEAH COMEDY HISTORY!"

Iliza Shlesinger is essentially a modern version of Midge, and she is very very funny. Sarah Silverman is also so fucking good. So is Taraji P Henson.

THERE ARE SO MANY FUNNY PEOPLE IN THE WORLD.

Have you ever seen Robin Williams doing stand-up in the 80's? It's on youtube. It's great.

There's this one story that Mel Brooks told once where Richard Pryor had a gig, and he didn't wanna do it and he was like "Mel, you do it." So Mel, being the short, nebishy Jew that he is, WENT UP ON STAGE AND DID RICHARD'S ENTIRE ACT JUST AS HIMSELF. Upon competition of said act, Richard said: "...Never again."

I have a lot of mixed feelings on John Mulany as a person, and the way that he cultivated parasocial relationships with fans through his act, but his stuff is still fucking funny. You just have to remember it's all bullshit.

I also have a soft spot for Donald Glover. Sarah Millican is so great, too. Moms fucking Mabley.

Carol Burnett too! There's this Dick Cavett interview on Youtube with Carol Burnett, Lucille Ball and Lucy Arnaz, and Cavett is so outclassed. Omg.

And like. John Oliver is so good. He's so good. He does so much research for his show, and he makes terrible things palatable through comedy.

I know I'm missing tons of people. I just love funny stuff.

#Comedy tonight!