#flaws but he Listened to how it could be made better and the cc is such a good guy i want him to have FUN

[mishapen-dear]

HUGE probs to cc!forever btw i thought he added the furniture thing as a joke option to like- legitimately get under q!bad's skin to give cc!bad an excuse to give his cubito more problems. but no apparently his chat were just instigators and made that suggestion to him 😭

i'm so impressed by how he got blindsided by a Full Lore Mode angry q!bad and kept his cool, and worked to communicate, and admitted when qbad had a good idea about the voting (qbad could NEVER), and went and got Cellbit when he realized the language barrier was too much. absolute king shit over there. like here he is trying to legit make the server better on a meta level and gets blindsided by q!bad's lore problems and he rolled with it so so well. he's doing legit such a good job for the server

and this is like- me being a bad fan, and i know it was an accident, but im very grateful to him for how that shook out. every time bad starts to get a little lore moment or something dramatic for his storyline, it fizzles out or gets overtaken by something else. cc!bad has been doing a great job with his storytelling/roleplaying and building up a narrative of feeling unappreciated/like a helping object instead of a person (and i could GUSH about the parallels between qbad and qforever and how they recognized those feelings in each other) but!! the point is that cc!forever did it. even accidentally. he created a catalyst event that could finally get my favourite little cubito off of his rocker (FINALLY), and bad is a good person to get off of his rocker. this is going to be a gorgeous little storyline that i am going to enjoy so so much. forever wanted to do good for the server and the story and by god he has done it

#qsmp #cc!bad clarified that it was all roleplay like three separate times last night while he was building the base btw #he's well aware that this conflict is gonna be a lil distressing for people #he's also well aware that so so so many of his fans want him to go to jail #idk i see a lot of people being upset or just-generally annoyed today and i hope that forever leans into the rp and has so so much fun with #it. he deserves to be a little menace on purpose and i hope people are SO nice to him about this #because he has genuinely given the bbh fanbase a huge gift we have been waiting for our cube to snap for AGES #and this gets him a lot closer to that #i really want forever to have fun #he cares so mcuh about figuring out a good system to let the islanders have a vote about what mods are added and aaaaaaaaaa the test had #flaws but he Listened to how it could be made better and the cc is such a good guy i want him to have FUN

[balillee]

my unpopular dsmp opinions, some of which genuinely should be popular

c!dream has crossed the moral event horizon and is irredeemable. once you cross that threshold, you're no longer a 'morally grey' character.

pre-recorded, heavily produced lore killed the lore. it was cool, sure, but you completely misunderstand the magic that the smp had when people watched it initially. the story is improv and that's how we like it. we can tell the cc's have lost interest in it, you can admit that to us, we'll understand, just stop lying to me.

c!dream's pov isn't necessary to understand his character or his motivations. if you've watched literally any c!primeboys stream he's basically spelled it out for you.

i don't understand how fans can dislike l'manberg or have claimed to be against it since the beginning. i honestly don't get it. what's so bad about wanting your own spot where you make your own rules and skirt accountability that has been used to technically oppress you before - and, before someone who never saw the earlier streams tries to disagree with this, the og l'manberg crew were imprisoned for shit that everyone else on the server was practically encouraged to do. also, what do you have against fun and happiness?

i think some of you forget that 'hybrids' aren't a thing, discounting c!ranboo. there's no piglin hybrids, c!techno is just a pig. there's no avian hybrids, c!phil is just a man with wings. there's no creeper hybrids, c!sam is just a creeper who's indecently exposed from the hips down. canonically there's no hybrids, and therefore no hybrid discrimination. people ran with that concept too much.

the loss and the fanon rewriting of the early lore up until pogtopia has ruined fandom perception of c!dream and the og l'manberg boys. c!tommy is more morally white than you think he is, and c!dream has always been a villain - he massacres and he kills and he destroys and he schemes and he always has broken his own rules. no wonder the boys wanted their own space after how they were treated.

i think ranboo oftentimes forgets his own lore. he brings stuff up that c!ranboo may have done, such as exploding the community house to frame c!tommy, holding onto Cat, and it goes absolutely nowhere. we've gotten all of these developments in his story but they have never been expanded on, and we're nowhere closer to figuring out his relationship to c!dream and what his other side is and honestly i see no hope that we'll be any closer to knowing even by the end of the year.

your characters don't all have to be morally grey for the story itself to be morally grey. this is fiction - some people can be nothing but evil and others can be nothing but good. being purely good or evil doesn't mean that you're one dimensional, either.

c!dream apologists have ruined c!dream for me. he's not a good person. how about you let me enjoy a villain for who he actually is, rather for than your percieved woobified ragdoll you pass off as c!dream.

the story was better when there was a central writer. it was brilliant back when wilbur wrote it to be that the environment drives the characters and the story, and it was really good in early s2 up until techno's execution day when it was more character driven. since then, the amount of autonomy people have over their characters without any central 'director', as it were, has been a detriment to the story overall. there needs to still be one overarching figure or director or writer.

not everyone is a main character. just because they have a pov, doesn't mean they're a main character. some characters have such little impact on the overall plot and describing everyone as a main character oversaturates the story and makes some characters seem more important than they are.

the egg lore had so much potential up until it didn't. all that built up threat that we were expecting and we still don't even know what the egg wants really other than just controlling people. does it hatch?

genuinely, if there's no major plot developments by the end of the year (and let's be honest, it's a very big possibility at this point), a few of the more prominent members of the server should do a podcast style stream talking about where the story would have gone, because at least then we would have gotten somewhat closer to a conclusion.

c!techno is a villain and an asshole and a bad person. he stops caring for people once their interests don't align with his or if they look at him funny. he makes meta-jokes about his own tyrannical and oppressive nature. stop taking that away from him. he's a bad person. cc!techno does a fabulous job portraying that in a comedic manner and the balancing of him being a deeply flawed person with deeply flawed morals and ideas with his comedically-portrayed stubbornness and lack of willingness to hear out opposing viewpoints is incredible. i want to like characters who are arseholes for the sake of being arseholes, and who refuse to take into account the hurt they've caused either out of self-righteousness or because they don't care, so let me. he's the anti-peacemaker, LET ME HIM ENJOY HIM FOR THAT!!!!

i think tommy and wilbur's way of doing lore is my favourite. relies heavily on improv, voice acting, sprite acting and facial expressions. really shows off the acting props and they pull off the emotional moments well for the insanity of the creative medium.

i'm not a fan of fan-music. i find songs about media i'm into difficult to listen to. coincidentally i'm also not a fan of shit like slam poetry or live music/musicals/pantomimes.

the death of l'manberg killed people's motivation to go on the server casually. i've talked about it more in depth before, but destroying what was a central, driving environment for the story killed momentum and motivation. imagine in an episode of she-ra, the princess alliance just nuke the freight zone and all of the members of the horde just have to deal with it. that would be shit.

until season 3 has some momentum, i'm counting the end of the smp as january 20th. that had a conclusion. season 3 has... whores, technoblade and tommyinnit. that's about it.

i wasn't a fan of the development of c!tubbo joining las nevadas. i preferred snowchester and the walled city conflict. give c!tubbo some backbone and some badassery. also tubbo where's the fucking nuke bro if you're shelving that plotline just tell us on like an alt stream what the plan was i beg

add like 2 or 3 new people to the server so that michael mcchill has someone to talk to and so that there's something always happening on the server. it gives the og's more motivation to return if things are happening in and out of canon and it'll help with momentum, and who knows? maybe they can write their own story/stories.

i really think that c!sam is an underrated character. he's multilayered, extremely interesting, and the dichotomy of his loyalty to his job and how far down the rabbithole that's taken him versus the genuine love he has for his friends that drives him to do what he does out of wanting to do right by them is brilliant. i don't talk about c!sam enough.

STOP HAVING FUCKING VILLAIN ARCS!!! I'M FUCKIN SICK OF IT!!!! i want to see more characters who see everyone else being absolute selfish, abhorrent cunts and go 'if nobody else is going to be a good person, i fucking will'. GIVE ME SOME MORAL WHITENESS!!! IT'S INTERESTING AND MORALLY GOOD CHARACTERS ARE FUN!!!

let tommyinnit build cobblestone towers. everyone bullied him too much for how ugly they were and the one he built outside of the prison looked genuinely really nice. it gives the boy something to do.

i'm a fan of the revive book and the canon lives system. don't ask me why, but i think it might just be the morbidity of it. it adds to c!dream's god complex persona, and i think the fragility of death itself is a really fun concept. not enough fan cc's have made connections with that and c!mumza, and it could make for cool fanfic.

ranboo your house is fucking ugly. it's an eyesore

c!niki, and to some extent now c!jack and c!fundy, are boring me and ruining my mood. i think c!jack is the closest to being an actually interesting sympathetic villain, mainly because nobody else seems to realise that c!niki is a villain. not a good one imo, but she's a villain. c!jack just has the problem of starting a new project over and over and over and over again and because of the slow in momentum for the primary cast, there hasn't been a lot of recent development for him.

not really a dream smp opinion, but if philza went full geordie accent, i would love it. i want him to, in canon, say shit like 'me n ye' instead of 'me and you' and use geordie dialect. i want him to be physically unintelligible because it's funny.

i don't really know what's up with c!foolish but i think he's a dumbass. he had a while to think about c!q's proposal and then changed his mind about joining the guy to admitted to letting him die just because. moron

i wish there was more c!eret lore. i wish he was an actual king with an actual kingdom and actual subjects and royal advisors. c!eret is far too fucking cool to be the king of nothing and nobody. fatten up the kingdom and the castle with people who work with c!eret, and don't just make it tyrannical and dictator-y to prove the point of the server's 'anarchists'. make it a healthy working environment, please - if you want moral greyness, have 'anarchists' who claim to care about the welfare of the server oppose a kingdom of happy people under a fair and just ruler because their ideologies clash.

the server needs more characters who oppose anarchy in more peaceful ways, or passively wish for systems to be a part of. i think a chaos vs order conflict ending only in mutual understanding where everyone understands that they should just leave each other alone would slot nicely into the story that's been created so far.

you need to have watched all of the previous arcs to understand the story. i've seen people argue that they don't need to know about earlier lore to understand the prison, but that's the equivalent of only watching the final season of pretty little liars and expecting to understand the context of what's going on.

some characters aren't that morally grey. some characters, take c!tommy for example, are definitely on the whiter side for the morality scale, he's just an asshole. he's abrasive and rude and a dickhead but he also doesn't agree with terrorism, he's patriotic, he strives for a better world, he's apologetic, but he's also a fucking BITCH.

you can add onto this if you want, but not if you're a c!dream apologist. nobody likes your opinions

#dream smp #dsmp #esclaposhitpost

[eulchu]

listen i fully agree with you. twitter is just a cesspool and it's best for people (not just creators, the fans too) stay off of it tbh. I'm not gonna pretend dream is perfect, but he sure isn't the person the internet makes him out to be. Controlling 23 million people that have just introduced themselves to you in the past year is literally impossible. I do like how the trend today, however, is trying to be used to lift up black creators. That's the best use I've seen of one of those things ever. The rest of it is just gross. And the situation with Karl genuinely upsets me. The boy didn't do anything. Literally the internet just wanted to bully an energetic, neurodivergent dude because he's not exactly what they want him to be. When they couldn't find anything he actually said that would be "canceleable", they made him answer for other people's actions and made up conspiracy theories. I can tell Karl is super sensitive to the way he can affect people and the idea of hurting someone is probably his worst nightmare, so I was (and am) genuinely worried for him. He gets shit no matter where he goes. I feel like Dream at least has a pretty solid support system. I'm just worried Karl may not have the same thing. (Sorry for the long message, I just wanted to talk about this a little lol)

ohh where do i start!

1. dream is flawed! and there's nothing wrong with admitting it. everyone is. i'm not gonna lie, you know i haven't been into the dreamsmp for the longest time but from what i can see i really admire his eagerness to do better and apologize for the things he's done wrong VERY thoroughly (mostly. once he's cooled down. he's not very good at dealing with confrontation). i'm not gonna pretend that i know everything that's been going on since he rose to fame nor am i a black person NOR know enough american culture to understand the correlation between his tweet and the (unintentional??) racist undertone, but i will say that today crossed a line, overall. i agree it was nice to see the poc cc threads (that's the only good thing that happened today) but man...

not only as a neordivergent person but also (as of right now, days away from graduating) a psych student, the hate and harassment he got for the "normal pills" is ridiculous. i'm not gonna get into it because i could write another whole essay about it, so all i'm gonna say is: ridiculous. and from what i've seen that's usually how it goes? same thing with the pride merch! he only did it because his fans asked for it. he has the Trevor project permanently linked to his sm accs. he's donating a shitton of money and people still tried (and ARE trying) to cancel him because his intentions are "fishy". everything he does has to get twisted into something that wasn't inherently hurtful.

and god don't even get me started on the doxxing and harassment and body shaming.... and people making a joke out of it because it's just so fucking funny! isn't it? i'm glad he's taking a break. i would've quitted everything months ago.

2. about the karl situation, this is an interesting one - you see, the first member of the dsmp i took notice of was mr karl jacobs! unlike w the rest of the dsmp, i've known karl waaay before christmas. i always had a spot for him, back when i only knew him through corpse's videos. you can imagine how that's amplified since i found out he's part of the feral boys. it was actually videos of a call between tina and karl that caught my attention and eventually led me to a lot of dsmp recs. honestly? i kinda hate that karl's lowest moment was what made me notice this whole community.

i cannot stress how awful i feel about this whole situation. and all for what? to this day i still don't know what made people be so goddamn horrible and mean to the kid. i knew almost nothing about him, except that he was friends with corpse and had met up with sapnap, and i remember when i heard about all the awful things that had been said to him on stream i went on a rage rampage and turned into the control police in yt comments. it just... doesn't compute. people kept saying 'stop saying this karl stops eating when this happens' and everyone??? went 'good'???? what the fuck? how can you sleep at night knowing you destroyed someone's mental health. i was so worried i even sent him a dm on instagram. i don't send dms. ever.

i get what you mean about the support system and yeah, i feel like dream has a big thing going on with sapnap and george? like everyone's close with everyone of course but i feel like the three are ride or die. i do however think that for karl, that's sapnap too. just based off on his personality and his relationship with karl, i like to think that he's a very strong support system for karl too.

overall i'm so glad i got to know them and i love their content but i really really wish someone would get them off the internet. they're gonna be ruined by 25 if people keep it up.

#long ask you say :) may i interest you in a long answer #i'm sorry i totally ranted my way through this #dreamwastaken #karl jacobs #dream neg #karl neg #eating disorder tw #ask #kraken45

[mb0w]

ramble ahead: Big Thoughts on c!sam

/rp

i’ll preface this by saying i KNOW sam is a terrible person as of now. he’s brutal and ruthless, and he’s willing to put the prison over everything and everyone else. he’s going through a wonderfully made corruption arc (claps for cc!awesamdude my beloved).

but i do think the animosity people are showing him after this stream is a bit strange. not because it’s unwarranted (he was awful to both tommy and ghostbur), but because it’s like people don’t want to acknowledge the NUANCE behind his reaction. i’ll be honest!! he reacted better than i thought he would!!

and so here’s Big Thought #1: if it was anyone else, sam would’ve killed them. obviously, i can’t say for sure if this is true, but he took one of ponk’s canon lives for something WAY more trivial, and that was his canonical bf. cc!sam has said that his character has a soft spot for the kids of the server, but ESPECIALLY tommy. i think part of the reason sam reacted so aggressively (and lost a bit of his warden!sam cool) was because he was 3 seconds away from a panic attack. he was seeing ANOTHER situation spiral out of his control, and he didn’t know what tommy’s objective was (tommy tried to tell him, but he wasn’t in his right mind, and was probably unable to comprehend what tommy was saying to him). i personally got the vibe that not only was he furious about tommy breaking into the prison, but he was also furious about tommy putting himself in danger again (not only from dream, but from sam himself). something i haven’t seen many people talk about is that BOTH sam AND tommy were having massive breakdowns. NEITHER of them were in the right headspace to explain and listen to each other. this is why i think sam wouldn’t let ghostbur back across. at this point, i think his main goal was just getting everything to stop, to FREEZE, so he could take control back. it wasn’t that he didn’t want to save ghostbur, it was more that he was TERRIFIED he was going to make another mistake, and leaving ghostbur was what he considered the safest option. this is one of the biggest reasons i personally think he’s unfit to be Warden: he gets so caught up in the rules and protocol that it’s almost as if he can’t make his own decisions.

and here comes Big Thought #2: people don’t consider sam’s trauma the way they do other character’s. again, this isn’t a way for me to excuse sam’s actions. the characters deserve to hate him for what he’s done to them, but i do think it’s weird that as viewers that know his whole story, some people STILL think he’s just pure evil. he used to be a good man! he would go around giving everyone steak and pumpkin pie, and he loved his friends, and i’m pretty sure he was even thinking about adopting tommy (though i could be misremembering). he was kind, generous, and loving, but like any other character, he had a few flaws that became his downfall (greed, pride, ambition, a need for control). but it’s important to remember that the prison plot is not the ONLY plot sam is a part of: he hates and fears the egg with a passion (this a thought maybe for another post, but it’s so cool to me how in the dsmp, characters can be the bad guys in some stories, and the heroes in others, it’s SO cool!!).

let’s look at the first plot: his job as warden. to begin with, he BUILT the prison. sam is a guy who puts so much of himself into what he makes (read: sam nook), and he spent more time building the prison than anything else on the server, so it’s no surprise that he eventually became obsessed with it; it’s HIS. but it wasn’t his idea, it was dream’s. it was DREAM who designed the prison to be so brutal and inhumane (a very much “you made your bed, now lie in it” moment). but as soon as there was a prisoner in the vault, sam’s job became very serious. he hates dream, and promised himself he would do anything to keep him locked up. this got to the point where he would spend all day alone with dream; he was practically imprisoned as well. not only was he constantly surrounded by a brutal torture chamber of dream’s own design, but he had to spend the whole day with the guy. there’s NO ONE who could’ve come out the same after that, especially after hearing, in detail, exactly what dream did to tommy in exile, and how much fun he had doing it. the extreme pressure of being the only one to make sure dream couldn’t get out was too much, and after tommy’s death, it all got so much worse. although this trauma is somewhat self-imposed, it’s still a big part of why he acts the way he does.

moving on to trauma #2: his time spent in the egg. why did everyone forgot how horrifying this was?? he literally ATE HIMSELF. this subplot was literal body and psychological horror. it was SCARY. tommy and puffy got him out, and he was practically a zombie. he couldn’t walk on his own, he could barely speak, and they LITERALLY had to stop him from eating his own rotten flesh. the egg ROTTED him, he was DECAYING. that’s nasty!!! it wore down his mental and physical state so much, that he was out of it for at least a week. and he only truly recovered physically. although he broke fully out of the egg’s control, his will had been worn down, and i don’t think it ever went back to how it used to be. it seems that his time in the egg brought out the worst in him: regarding the egg, he became so terrified that he can hardly do anything to help; and regarding the prison, he doubled down on his work and became obsessed.

sam is not MENTALLY okay!! idk how else to put it! he needs help, but he’ll never accept it (and none of the characters he’s hurt are obligated to help him). and that’s why i’m confused why people never bring up his trauma and mental issues in discussions about him; they do with wilbur and tommy. now idk much about wilbur, because i only started watching dsmp right before tommy for exiled, so i don’t really have a stance on him. but in almost every analysis of him, people make sure to clarify they aren’t villainizing him and his mental illnesses. it just kinda works my nerves when they don’t do the same with other characters.

whew sorry that was so long lmao. overall, i think my main point is that sam’s story makes me sad, not angry. he’s tragic, not evil. and once more, i’m gonna end this with OBVIOUSLY sam has hurt people, and they are in no way obligated to forgive him or help him! but hopefully this post kinda got across the reason i understand why he reacted the way he did.

feel free to add on, but be kind lmao. and i’m not rly sure what trigger warnings to tag, so let me know if miss one!

#dream smp #awesamdude #tommyinnit #sam meta #character analysis #long post #tw body horror #tw abuse #c!dream critical #tw torture #eggpire #bow.fav

[wayward-wren]

What up lads new Philza Lore dropped

Been thinking about this since it's been revealed that c!Phil is immortal, or at least centuries old. I like analysing things, and my brain has been chugging away analysing c!Phil since this new revelation and I finally found time to sit down and get my thoughts out.

Unless specified, I'll be talking about the character Philza from now on! Let's get into it. Putting a cut in because it gets long. Also most of this is gonna be from memory because it's getting late and I'm not digging through 4+ months of vods!

remind me to never use the new Beta posting layout it gave me a word limit and then yeeted like 800 words i hate it here lets see if i can remember what I wrote

I’ve moved a lot in my life. I think on average about one new city every four years. This has meant a lot of goodbyes, a lot of meeting new people and breaking into new circles. When this new information was revealed, I instantly felt things click - I could relate to Phil suddenly. 

Being centuries-old would create similar emotions, I think. Constantly being around people you know you will outlive, constantly finding yourself in new circles and groups. It takes a toll. 

Being centuries old effects how Phil views relationships, people and countries.

Because I’ve moved a lot, I’ve noticed that I’m starting to get the attitude of ‘I can’t be bothered.’ I can’t be bothered going out of my way to meet new people, to make new friends I’m likely to move away from in a few years. 

I’d imagine Phil would feel much the same way. Making close connections to people is impossible for him, really. He knows he’s going to outlive those around him and so the effort to put into growing relationships seems pointless. 

I think this is most seen in his and Wilbur’s relationship. Wilbur clearly wants his attention - his pride - and clearly hasn’t gotten it to the extent he wants. (“I wonder if Phil would be proud of me” comes to mind. Plus I’m sure there’s something there with his relationship with Fundy and that cycle of bad parenting. And yes, it likely contributed to his spiral into madness, but this post is about Phil, not Wilbur.) But from Phil’s perspective, he knows Wilbur isn’t going to live as long as he is. 

It explains why he’s so quick to kill Wilbur as well. Wilbur is too far gone, and Phil makes the decision to kill him before he does more harm. He’s long ago accepted the fact that his son will die before him, and so he is able to kill him. 

Likewise, his relationship with Tommy reflects this. He doesn’t reach out to Tommy because there’s no point in making a new bond with someone who he will outlive. (especially with Wilbur’s death so fresh). However, he does make it clear that if Tommy reached out to him, he would have answered - more on that later. 

His age also means he’s always looking at the big picture. He’s likely seen countless countries and empires and kingdoms rise and fall and he knows that they’re all temporary. He doesn’t see the importance in them like those who live and die within the lifespan of a nation. 

He doesn’t see the small details. He doesn’t understand why Ghostbur is so upset about a simple sheep’s death - one with unlimited lives as well. In his mind, it’s just an animal. In Ghostbur’s mind, Friend is a friend, an important small thing. Phil is so used to moving on from things, he doesn’t understand the importance of pets and nations and a home. 

This is all temporary in his mind, and lives are more important to him than a country. L’manberg was corrupting people (Tubbo, quite possible Wilbur in his mind) and thus it didn’t serve its purpose and needed to go before it hurt more people. (plus I wonder if there were some underlying anger and frustration towards L’manberg for the loss of his wings. It’s basically canon now (everyone say thank you Sadist!) that Phil’s wings were damaged during the explosion, and I would imagine for someone so old, losing limbs like wings and being grounded would be a shock and some of that may have been projected onto L’manberg)

(I also want to talk briefly about his and Techno’s relationship. While we haven’t had any canon confirmation, I don’t think Techno is fully mortal and it makes sense for Phil to gravitate towards other ancient beings. Plus my friend pointed out another theory in that Phil could be a patron of some kind for Techno, something Blood God related, I don’t know we need more information Techno please give us character lore I beg of you)

OKAY! I rewrote what I already had sometimes I hate Tumblr anyway onward let’s write this out before I pass out I’m tired. 

Phil is willing to create relationships - but on his terms.

I said Phil is distant and hesitate to create bonds with people but this isn’t necessarily true. I want to point out Fundy and Ranboo and talk about his interactions with them and then talk about Tommy. 

At the start of season two, Fundy, Ghostbur and Phil were really driving the lore. Phil seemed to be trying to bond with Fundy, and I think a lot of that likely had to do with guilt from what happened to Wilbur but there’s something deeper to it. He makes an effort to be there for Fundy and to help him.  

Likewise, he went out of his way to save Ranboo from lava (though the overlap for in character and ooc is large there, I think it still applies), and brought him home after Doomsday, saving him from his own mind. 

Phil seems himself as a benevolent being. He sees himself as right, and part of that is being there for his grandson, or helping out a hybrid in trouble. 

However, it’s important to note - this is on his terms. He’s lived so long, he doesn’t want to put energy into relationships that won’t give him back something. For Fundy, I think a lot of it was making up for what happened with Wilbur and family responsibility, but he enjoyed spending time with Fundy (it’s been a while I need to rewatch some of those vods I think). 

With Ranboo, again I feel like there’s a small part in fulfilling some need of Phil’s to feel like he’s being ‘good’ and plucking this kid out of a warzone makes him feel good. But at the same time, Ranboo is polite, quiet, generous - the perfect kind of person to put energy into building a relationship with. Plus, I would not be surprised if Ranboo reminds him of Techno.  

If a relationship takes too much, or isn’t worth it - Phil drops it and doesn’t bother trying to fix what is broken. Why would he? He’s just going to outlive whatever the problem is. He lived in L’manberg, but he was never a part of it. He dismissed Tubbo so quickly when he saw Tubbo was being corrupted by his power and position. He didn’t follow up on Fundy or check that he was okay or make any effort to reach out to him when things started to go down. 

And that brings us to Tommy. We’re all upset at how Phil reacted to Tommy’s exile and the following, but I think it makes so much sense. Like I said before, he doesn’t put the effort into reaching out to Tommy, but he would have gone to the Beach Party if Tommy had reached out to him. He was happy to see Tommy at Techno’s place, he was willing to create that relationship and bond. 

But from Phil’s pov, Tommy was thrown aside by his home, found shelter with Techno, and then betrayed Techno by siding with the people who threw him aside. (and Techno is loyal to the few he trusts, so a betrayal like that will hit hard and Phil can see that). It makes sense that Phil decides that isn’t a relationship he wants to put energy into fixing. 

(Also to clarify, I’m not saying Tommy was wrong to side with L’manberg and Tubbo, or that Techno was right in lashing out like he did. I’m just saying it’s a complex issue, and seeing all sides of it is important - they were both betrayed that day). 

Living so long means Phil only cares to put effort and energy into relationships that benefit him, in whatever way. If someone is too difficult or needs too much effort, then in Phil’s mind there’s no reason to pursue that relationship. 

Being so old makes Phil overly confident in himself.

Philza is always in the right. Full stop. End of story.

He’s lived so long and has so much more experience than anyone else that he thinks he is in the right all the time. His fatal flaw is his pride and - much like Techno - he refuses to see anything from anyone else’s point of view. 

He saw L’manberg’s corruption, saw that it as a nation was hurting people and made the decision that it was doing more hurt than good so of course he joined Techno and Dream in destroying it. 

He sees the big picture and so of course Friend’s death doesn’t matter, Friend was just an animal. Ghostbur is too naive and foolish to understand that now. 

Unless he learns to listen and see someone else’s point of view - which will be very hard, because he’s so old and connecting with people is hard for him - he’s going to continue to think he’s always in the right. 

Conclusion

There’s a few things I want to see/think might happen with Phil’s character, one more likely than the other. 

First off - Karl. 

If anyone knows how to look at the big picture, if anyone knows how insignificant the simple things are and how pointless it can be sometimes it’s the server’s resident time traveller. But where Karl differs from Phil is that he cares. 

Karl goes out of his way to help, risks his memory and sanity to make things better for his friends. Pours time and effort and energy into relationships that may be onesided or temporary - heck, have you seen how much effort he goes to to be liked by everyone? Sometimes too much. 

I’d love to see some Karl and Phil interaction. Maybe in a Tales episode (young Phil? Backstory? Maybe?) or even in regular canon. It’s unlikely probably, but I think it could be an interesting discussion. Someone write a fic. 

Secondly - death. 

CC!Phil has made it no secret that his character is probably going to die at some point (if only for ghost WINGSSSS). Honestly? I think it could be a great direction to take the character. 

If Phil could find something worth dying for, could find the joys in the small things, could focus on the little details enough to realize - ‘oh. This does matter’ I honestly think that would be cool. A sacrificial death, maybe even for something as ‘insignificant’ as a pet (although pets can be important on this server). I’m not sure, but I think making peace with death would be a great way to take an immortal character’s arc.

There’s more I could talk about - for instance, I haven’t even mentioned the ‘not as painful as what I inflicted on their enemies’ comment and Phil’s whole ‘angel of death’ vibe, or the fact that he’s always only had one life. But it’s getting late and I’ve been writing this for like an hour and a half and I’m really tired. Feel free to add on! 

#dream smp #dsmp #mcyt #philza #philza minecraft #this was fun #please reblog i put a lot of effort into this and i'd love people to see it! #let me know what you think ^-^ #i'm going to have to find some songs and write something at some point probably #anyway sleep time #this is nearly 2000 words guys #im putting my highschool english essay skills to very good use

[colorisbyshe]

if you want to complain more about clamp I am listening :) as someone who owns many volumes of the manga in multiple languages...... I am listening. <3

okay i’m just gonna rant in a very, very long post everyone please just avert your eyes mental illness is happening

but like....... as someone who was nostalgically reading these manga to bring back some happy memories i had as a kid, discovering that these series (ccs which i remembere dfondly despite not having actually watched/read as a kid, and trc and xxxholic which i read with some of my best friends at the time) are not just deeply flawed but harbouring so much like... frankly heinous shit in them is like??? deeply hurtful to me???

and like... i could handle cardcaptor sakura being full of evil shit because i had no deep personal connection, i just wanted to better understand ccs references in tsubasa and lik better appreciate syaoran and sakura and like its 90s shoujo OVER COURSE ITS FUCKED UP! just like sailor moon and fruits basket like it’s not good but like... i can process it

trc hurts me because like... the character writing for kurogane and fai is fucking PHENOMENAL, the concept is cool and interesting and unique, it (for the most part) has great themes and the way it explores concepts like grief, trauma, sacrifice, and healing was a balm to my quarantined soul

but you can tell where they realized they literally... did not know how to resolve their plot? and it got so complicated it legit gave me headaches but at least i had kurogane nad fai and then they’re shoved to the side just for it to be revealed that syaoran... is syaoran and sakura’s son... looking to meet up with sakura... to be with her... so they can be his parents

like... wow so great to watch this beautiful relationship be explored with kurogane and fai saving each otehr from the worst part of themselves just to be sidelined for “what if those fourth graders from cardcaptor sakura where husband and wife AND mother and son but like NOT REALLY becaues syaoran is also syaoran’s own dad so is it incest or just really confusing” but no it’s both like legit when falling in love with sakura he comments on how she’s just like his mom like hello bitch? you’re 14 but i’ll still kill you that shit is WEIRD

so that wAS NOT GREAT and then it ends with THE GROUP SEPARATED AT THE END?? SO I COULDN’T EVEN GET A HAPPY ENDING like yeah maybe it’s good sakura and syaoran were separated but kurogane and fai got to stay together beacuse... fuck the incest  but like... where is my catharsis where is my happiness??

and i’m rereading xxxholic which was my favorite of trc/xxxholic as a kid and... first off, it’s boring, secondly, it thinks it’s smarter than it is an dhas contradicting themes every other chapter, but FUCK it’s so interesting but doumeki, himawari, watauniki, and yuuko don’t have half the bonds as the TRC gang and like... i still don’t know why doumeki was going so fucking hard for watanuki

but the concepts were interesting enoguh and watching watanuki grow was nice

but you can ALSO tell AGAIN clamp just got bored and didn’t know how to wrpa it up so suddenly watanuki gives up ALL HIS BONDS AND HURTS ALL HIS FRIENDS just to be reunited with yuuko??? despite the themes of the story being about how self sacrifice causes scars on others?? and that’s BAD like if you love your frieneds you don’t hurt them by undervaluing yourself??? THATS A BASIC THEME OFT HE STORY

and then they rush to pair off doumeki with a girl THEY HELPED RAISE so he can have children to stay with watanuki... himawari is written off despite her last interactions with watanuki being about them caring for each other anad choosing to stay in contact despite her curse... and like yuuko’‘s entire character is never explained she’s just like “i’m a woman who exists as a vehicle of plot in both TRC and xxxholic i will never be given depth beyond that... well also i’ll ruin watanuki’s life”

and hen the last chapters are just watching everyone grow up while watanuki is alone, never aging, helping grant wishes where he watches other immortal beings suffer and lose everyone, and it just ends with him relizing he likely won’t ever see yuuko again but he’ll keep waiting?? even though it’s been 100 yers and everyone he loves is dead??

and that shit is not good for my mental health like i feel like i have been isolated fo ra hundred years beacuse of covid watching watanuki choose it hurt edeply

like half the manga is about syaoran and sakura begging him not to vanish (also that plotline was WEIRDLY dropped) and the series ends with him effectively... vanishing a sa person and just becoming shopkeeper

how fucking depressing??

i could handle a sad ending if it had value. if it said something. if it didn’t have doumeki marrying a girl he knew since she was an abused elementary schooler while he was like 17. ESPECiALLY when IN THE PANELS REVEALING IT it weren’t like “atcually neither of them love each other they love watanuki but it’s fine” like HUH????????? FOR WHY

and ive really had to grasp the reason why there’s so much fucked up shit (incest, pedophilia) in those series is core to CLAMP’s messages accross all their mangas about soulmates nad how about love can triumph over everything

and like using such a PURE message to be like “if an adult is in love with a child and they’re soulmates, it’s to be” is so fucking evil

like they’ll tip toe around kurogane and fai, yukito and touya, doumeki and watanuki, and all the gaybait that i KNOW is in their other series because i’ve grown up seeing shit like tokyo babylon and legal drug and all their other dropped manga

because gay peopl ebeing soulmates is a wink and a nod

but ADULTS WITH CHILDREN THEY ARE IN CHARGE OF??? MOTHER AND SON MAYBE??? oh that’s fine they’re REAL soulmates who will go against TIME AND DIMENSION MAGIC ITSELF to be in love

like...............................

gay people are second class characters compared to pedos and incest... does it get worse than that? like besides emotionally destroyed by the sad endings, i get that shit too?

it hurts on a deeper level like feels like a betrayal and i’m kind of really sad i revisited something i enjoyed so much as a kid (even when i didn’t understand wtf was going on, because i was literally reading it at the same time my friend was and rushing) andd discovered this like... deep rot inside it

i could have continued to remember it fondly but now it’s just like... reaching the last bite of cake and being told it was made with maggots like... well i already ate it all...

there’s no point reading clear card or the unfinished tsubasa/xxxholic sequels because they’ve already ruined themselves like they can’t fix it

kurogane and fai still won’t be allowed to be together. watanuki still outlived everyone who ever loved him for a mother figure that can never come back. cardcaptor wrote off the fourth grader engaged to hre teacher but like... sakura’s dad is still a preadator

like... what do i do with these left over feelings then?

i’ll be over it in a dya but like for tonight i really do feel unwell

okay thank you i got it out in one post i am processing the feelings

i am gonna cry about watanuki being alone tho

[vfdbaudelairefile13]

Authors notes: There are brief descriptions of violence against a minor and brief discussion of Olaf's sick intentions with Violet. Read with caution. It isn't the main focus of the chapter but it is mentioned here and there. So read with caution.

Also, sorry if this chapter is super long I just kept adding a lot of shit and I honestly like how it turned out.

Notes:

First off I just want to apologize for how long this chapter took. Time has gotten away from me but I can promise that part three will be a day to day posting schedule like part one. Carnivorous Carnival might still have a couple days in between each chapter cause I am in the process of finding a new second job, still dealing with two jobs, and even moving. So updates won't take this long but they won't be day to day. I am hoping for the first chapter of CC to be posted in three days. Maybe even Thursday. I do appreciate the support this fic has gotten and I can't wait to wow y'all with part three.

That being said, we are at the last chapter of Hostile Hospital and I am feeling very emotional about that mere prospect. This just means we are close to the end of part two and near the start of part three. during the time in between parts two and three I will be posting a number of random one shots cause I don't plan to post until I have finished writing Grim Grotto to it's completion because Slippery Slope might be as long as Hostile Hospital has been.

So thank you all again for the support. Hope you enjoy the ending of HH.

-Sue

__________________________________________________

                                   Chapter Fifty-Seven:

The One With An Unhinged Madman and a Very Flawed, Daring Escape

Olaf smiled happily down at the film that was now in his hands. The Snicket File? He thought as his smile grew bigger. All he could think about was who he expected to be in this film. He had believed it would’ve been the love of his life, Kit Snicket. He glanced from the film towards Esme. Esme was looking at the young orphan boy with a cold, murderous expression. He stole a glance towards the unconscious girl that laid limp and lifeless on the cutting table. Then he slowly turned his gaze to the young boy and hidden toddler who stood before him. He smiled viciously at them as he secured the film into his pocket.

The villain’s smile widened when Esme had helped him reveal the orphans’ true identity to the crowd. He watched a terrified Klaus slowly begin to panic. The villain reveled in his young adversary’s fear. He glanced around. Bored with his plot. He was curious to know what was on the Snicket file and to tell the truth, he was eager to see Kit’s face again. Olaf glanced at Esme while Klaus and Sunny were too distracted by the audience to notice. Olaf was signaling for Esme to take care of the orphans while he dipped out momentarily to investigate the file. Esme gave a slow nod as she focused on causing the orphans more turmoil. Olaf looked around the stage for a way to escape undetected. But he didn’t have to think for too long because the blind old man who was in charge of the Library of Records had entered the room accusing the children of theft.

Olaf took this golden opportunity to leave the operating theater of Heimlich Hospital as he walked excitedly down the halls towards the Library of Records. All the while, he had taken the film out of his pocket and was staring at it with heavy eyes the entire duration of his walk. As he walked further and further away from the operating theater, he could faintly hear the desperate voice of Klaus Baudelaire asking where he had gone, he smirked with triumph as he rounded a corner finding the door to the library. He stepped inside the Library of Records smiling at the damage that his girlfriend had done when she was in pursuit of those awful orphans. He quickly found the area of the room where the projectors had been placed.

As he began to play the film, his face turned from happy to one of pure confusion. As he stared speechless at a ghost. Olaf was visibly upset. When he was told about the Snicket file, he hadn’t expected to see a Snicket brother on film. He grabbed the film’s case scanning it for a date. Of course, in good VFD fashion, there was no date of production, just the broad name. He slammed the case down in pure annoyance.

His eyes widened as he stared emotionless at Jacques Snicket. “But, before I do, I have an important update,” Jacques explained but Olaf couldn’t help but be merely distracted on who he could see. Olaf knew for a fact that he had murdered Jacques Snicket. He cocked his head to the side as he stared at Jacques, a volatile mix of emotions causing him to groan in annoyance as the volunteer spoke. Olaf had expected to see Kit Snicket, not her pesky, meddlesome twin brother who he had recently slain. He leaned his chin in his hand, feigning a yawn. Trying his best to mask his complete and utter discomfort for this situation. He scoffed aloud as he rolled his eyes, confused as to what he was feeling exactly.

It couldn’t be guilt. I’ve sunk too low to ever feel guilt and have empathy for another soul. He had thought with another quick eye roll. He had half a mind to turn off the film.

What information could Jacques Snicket possibly have that could be useful to me?

But as Olaf reached for the switch to turn it off. Jacques Snicket said it. Jacques said the haunting secret that the three orphans had learned moments before Esme Squalor burst into the library and successfully kidnapped Violet.

The vile man’s demeanor was calm, like the air that filled the Library of Records. But his cold demeanor was also very chilling. Anyone who knew Olaf well would take one look at him and accuse the man who sat in the Library of Records to be an imposter. He chuckled nervously, but in a low whisper as if he were afraid of others hearing him. For a brief moment, Olaf simply stared blankly towards the film. Jacques Snicket spoke on but Olaf paid him no attention. As if Jacques’ initial statement had frozen him in time. Jacques’ secret replayed in Olaf’s head in a continuous loop not allowing him a brief moment of peace. Olaf shook his head violently, but other than that his motions were bare, his demeanor was still calm.

After another few moments like that, Olaf stopped the film, rewound it to the very beginning, and turned it back on. Again, he listened to Jacques’ revelation about the recent fires. This time when he heard Jacques' theory, his heart stopped. A chill was sent over him.

It can’t be. He thought to himself desperately. Quickly succumbing to anxiety and paranoia that was now creeping in on him, he glanced around the empty library. He stood up from his seat to get a better look around. He wasn’t sure why but he could feel his heart beating in his chest as he surveyed the area for his older enemies.

Olaf wouldn’t admit to anyone that he was afraid, even though he was. He knew that if the kids knew that there was a survivor; and he had a strong feeling that the children did, in fact, know what was on the film seeing that Klaus was hesitant to hand it over to Esme, only handing it over because he thought it would be a good bargaining chip for Violet’s life. But if the kids knew there was a survivor and they somehow got to the survivor first, before Olaf could, he knew that that would only mean terrible things for him. Who knows what Beatrice, Bertrand, and Lemony would do to him if they ever found out just what he had done to their children and even some of the vile things he had planned especially when it came to the eldest orphan. His breathing was slowly going back to normal as he shook his head again.

He scoffed as he turned off the film again. He waited for it to rewind as he kept shaking his head defiantly. “What does Jacques Snicket know? Nothing. That’s what.” he tried to convince himself. “He was always a know-it-all with no way to back anything up.” But no matter what he said aloud to himself, nothing was convincing him that he was safe from the parents’ wrath.

He ran one of his hands nervously through his disgusting, grey hair. “No. No. Lemony is dead.” he said shakily. But then he remembered how a struggling violet was desperately crying out for her father when he was using the anesthetic to subdue her. “Remember...you...you killed him. You set his apartment building ablaze!” the vile man began to nervously laugh at this statement. He was hoping for his laugh to come out shrill and villainous, as it usually does, but it came out nervous and unenthusiastic. “Killing him...and whoever else was unfortunate enough to die,”

His eyes widened when he remembered the young teen girl that was strapped to a gurney in the middle of the operating theater. How did she survive? How did she escape the fire? That question now haunted him more than it had when he had first laid eyes on her at Prufrock. When he immediately recognized her as a miniature Beatrice with Lemony’s blue eyes. Olaf remembers when he had set the fire it was in the early hours of the morning or late hours of the evening (depending on how you look at), surely Violet would have been sleeping or inside her home when he started the fire.  

So if an untrained fourteen-year-old girl could escape the fire I set….who’s to say, Lemony Snicket, a man who has had a lifetime of training in a cult, couldn’t escape as well? He thought to himself. He rubbed the side of his face anxiously.

“Get a grip, Olaf.” He told himself as he stopped the film. “She only escaped because that brat is lucky,” he smirked as he remembers her lifeless, limp body laying on a gurney in the operating theater. “And her luck is soon going to run out.”

He took a small breath. “Besides, there’s no way he survived...he would’ve shown his face by now.” The vile man reasoned, but to be honest, he wasn’t too sure. Olaf did not think it made sense for Lemony to risk his life for two children that weren't biologically his but not even try to rescue his own child. He also highly doubted Bertrand and Beatrice wouldn’t have shown their faces in an effort to save their kids. He began to nervously laugh as he shook his head. “Maybe...I misheard Jacques. He always played that stupid hearing game with Lemony…” Olaf stated, still trying to find some logical way to debunk what he heard Jacques Snicket say.

As he rewound the film once more, Olaf took a deep breath and played it again. Olaf’s eyes fixated on Jacques as he listened attentively as Jacques explained that Lemony was either dead or on the lam. Olaf’s eyes widened as he shook his head defiantly. “No. Lemony Snicket is dead,” he told himself. He hoped that if he said it out loud enough times then it would stay true. He desperately wanted that statement to stay true. He wanted Lemony Snicket to be dead.

Olaf glared slightly at the vision of Jacques Snicket. Grimacing, groaning, and growling as the ‘noble’ man spoke. It was like Jacques Snicket had come back from the dead to deliver Olaf some bad news. Jacques was always the bearer of bad news when Olaf was still working alongside the Snickets. He grabbed the file’s case once more and threw it to the ground when he couldn’t find a date. Even with the film’s metallic case cling ing on the ground as it bounced from being thrown, Olaf could still hear every word Jacques was saying loud and clear.

 “It seems there may have been a survivor of a recent fire,” Jacques said again. Olaf grumbled as he kicked the air in front of his feet. Even while sitting he managed to stomp both feet as if he were a child throwing a temper tantrum and not simply a very highly unstable grown man going through his seventh midlife crisis in the last several months. As his hand ran through his hair again, he took a firm grip, slightly pulling in anger and desperation.

“Of course…” he cried, mockingly. “Of fucking course!”

His breathing became sharp and quick but not from fear as it had only a few minutes ago. Now his breathing was irregular because of his anger. He felt a tear or two form in his eyes as he thought about how the people who have wronged him could still be alive.

“No,” he cried out. His voice was somewhat desperate but mainly defeated. “No! This isn’t fair!” He screeched as he rewound the film again, not caring to turn it off. The film rewound although this rewind had slightly distorted the video. But Olaf didn’t pay it any attention. “ Nothing ever goes my way!” He barked, his voice still dripped desperation even if he was trying his best to mask it. He thought of each and every scheme that had failed since his pursuit of Klaus and Sunny Baudelaire, this revelation caused him to growl. It was bad enough that the kids were surviving him but now their hypocritical parents?

“I can’t believe it,” Olaf whined. “ This changes everything!” The vicious man grabbed at his hair again, pulling at it aggressively as he growled inhumanely. His mind flashed to the unconscious girl on the cutting table, the bespectacled boy who was desperately trying to rescue her, and the simpering infant with the sharp teeth.

“ They’re supposed to be orphans!”  He growled, shaking with each word.

As he yelled that last sentence, he shut his mouth abruptly. His expressionless face slowly growing into a Grinch-like grin as his eyes shone with an idea. He began to laugh lightly as if he had just remembered a joke that Esme or one of his troupe members had told him.

Olaf’s world was currently spiraling as his happiness about getting his revenge against Lemony Snicket may not have actually happened or that his second-hand revenge against Bertrand Markson and Beatrice Baudelaire didn’t occur either and this revelation sent him in a frenzy. The mere idea of a survivor had his entire soul heated up.

His face grew dark as he thought, once more, about their three plucky children. A cruel, vicious smile appeared on the man’s face. “ It would be fun to deal with the survivor and their precious children.” He said aloud, his light laughter turned into full-grown villainous howling as his dark mind began to imagine cruel scenarios for the survivor and their children. A cruel smile appeared on his face as he began to fantasize about how he would ‘take care’ of these orphans in front of their parents.

He thought first about little Sunny, and how he would rip the infant limb from limb, listening to her screams and cries of agony and her parents and siblings horrified pleads. He then thought about Klaus and how he would cut the bookworm in such a way where the young boy slowly bled out agonizingly slow, somehow surviving through to the very end of Olaf’s madness, only to be killed the last second when Olaf finally decides to put him out of his misery with a quick slit of his throat. The sick man reveled in the screams that the survivor and Klaus would be making. He already knew how fun it was to carve up the middle orphan as if he were a pumpkin in October and he was very eager to do it some more. But then finally, he thought about Violet, the girl who laid unconscious and restrained on the cutting table. A sick smile laced with the cruelest of intentions appeared on his face as he began to imagine all of the dark and twisted things he had planned for little Miss Snicket. The mere prospect of even having an audience to be forced to watch as he breaks their little girl in the cruelest way imaginable made Olaf smile wickedly.

 He could finally cause the survivor more pain than they had caused him and he would use their own children to do so.  Maybe he can twist the cruel reality of a survivor of a recent fire in his favor. It would only take postponing murdering the brats until he found out who was the survivor and then brutally torturing their children to death in front of them. Olaf shrugged his shoulders. It wasn’t what he had initially planned but this gave him more time to torment the children and that always made him feel a little happier.

Finally, Olaf stood turning to leave. He felt as though he had been away from the operating theater for too long and he was beginning to worry that the others couldn’t handle the Baudelaires and an unconscious Snicket girl. He would be so fucking pissed if Esme and the others lost his little pet. But as he turned his back to Jacques Snicket for the last time, film Jacques said it once more. “There may be a survivor of a recent fire.”

Olaf took one deep breath as he stood motionless for a second. Jacques’ words hitting Olaf slowly as if Jacques were standing right in front of him, stabbing him cruelly.  “I know!” Olaf hissed, his hands slowly tightening to white-knuckled fists. He let out a vicious growl that caused his whole body to shake aggressively.

Olaf turned towards the projector rapidly as he shoved the projector that played the film down onto the table. In a fit of blind rage, Olaf gripped the projector and began to beat it repeatedly against the table. “ Baudelaire!” he hissed as he continued to beat the projector against the table. “ Markson!” He growled again as he turned towards the chair that he had sat in and kicked it with all his might. As the psychotic man hissed, “ Snicket!” the chair flew across the room only stopping when it collided with one of the filing cabinets that had survived Esme’s rampage. He turned back towards the projector continuing to slam it against the table, eventually shoving it down and then pounding on the table with his fists. “ NOOOOOOO!” He bellowed in the empty library. His voice echoing and bouncing off the walls

He gripped onto the projector one last time and rapidly smacked it against the table once more and carefully watched with curiosity when a small flame had illuminated. Olaf instinctively tried to swat it out but then as his eyes shone bright with an idea, his face went dark with no emotion besides cold ruthlessness.

He slowly bent down towards the flame, his face darkening as his sick thoughts danced around his head laced with cruel intentions. He softly blew at the flame, nurturing it, allowing it to grow into a full-fledged fire. As he gazed at the intoxicating orange flames, reveling in the intense high he was feeling, he merely shrugged his shoulders.

What’s one more fire?

________________________________________________________________

Klaus gazed up at the crowd nervously as he and Sunny jumped when they heard a familiar laugh, far above them. The two younger orphans glanced at one another nervously and then focused their gazes towards the intercom speaker that was above them. The siblings had heard this laughter when Olaf had first captured the Quagmire triplets and Sunny, and when Esme had successfully pushed Klaus and Violet down the elevator shaft at 667 Dark Avenue, and when he had trapped the two older siblings in a locked Deluxe Cell or trapped Sunny and the Quagmires in a small cage at the bottom of an elevator shaft, a statue of a red herring, and a fountain. It was the triumphant laughter of someone who has cooked up a fiendish plot and succeeded, although it always sounded like the laughter of someone who has just told an excellent joke. Because he was laughing over the scratchy intercom, Olaf sounded as if he had a piece of aluminum foil over his mouth, but the laughter was still loud enough to help wear off the anesthesia only slightly, and Violet murmured something and tried to move her restrained arms.

“Oops,” Olaf said, interrupting his laughter when he noticed the intercom was on. “Attention!” Olaf cried as Klaus cried out a desperate ‘no’ in response. “This is Doctor Mattathias Medical-School with some very important news. A terrible fire has broken out in Heimlich Hospital.”

The crowd around the children gasped as they all stood up from their seats. Even the troupe and Esme glanced at one another nervously. “The fire was set in the Library of Records by that Baudelaire murderer and his baby accomplice!”

“ Toddler!” Sunny corrected as the crowd began to glare at her and her brother.

“Sunny, not the time,” Klaus whispered as he continued to gaze up at the intercom, silently pleading for Olaf to stop his treachery. He shook his head as Olaf spoke and continued to mouth the word ‘no’.

“The fire has spread through a number of wards. The orphans are still at large, so do everything you can to find them, arrest them, and bring them to me. ” he hissed into the intercom.

“No,” Sunny whimpered as the crowd around the children glared intensely.

“Oh, and you might want to evacuate the building...or move the patients...or something,” Olaf said nonchalantly. “Thank you. That is all.”

Their enemy’s voice disappeared in a matter of seconds. Klaus looked around desperately. “We...we...we couldn’t have started the fire! We’ve been in this operating theater the whole time!” he reasoned.

“Get them!” One nurse cried. “Somebody tell Mattathias we’ve captured the children!” she turned to Klaus and Sunny. “You three brats are in big trouble. You’re murderers, arsonists, kidnappers, and now spurious doctors.”

“Don’t forget thieves!” Hal cried, holding up the fake key ring.

“They get that from their mother!” Esme cried angrily, glaring daggers at Klaus.

“That’s…” Klaus began but then he looked towards his sisters. “Not...not all of that is true...I only disguised myself...to save…” But as he looked around, he feared that no one was believing him. He looked at the spurious keyring in Hals’ hands that he and his sisters had used to sneak into the Library of Records. He looked at his ripped medical coat, which he had used to disguise himself as a doctor and he looked at the rusty blade in his own hands, which he had just been holding over his unconscious older sister. Klaus remembered when he and Sunny lived with Uncle Monty, and the two siblings, with some help from a disguised Lemony Snicket, brought several objects to Mr. Poe as evidence to Olaf’s treacherous plot. Because of the small objects, Olaf was placed under arrest, and now Klaus was afraid that the same would happen to him and his sisters.

“Surround them!” The Hook-Handed Man cried, pointing at the children with a curved glove. “But be careful. The bookworm still has the knife!”

Olaf’s associates spread out in a circle and slowly began walking towards the youngsters at all angles. Sunny whimpered in fright and ran behind Klaus’ legs as Klaus was trying to guard both his sisters. Klaus quickly picked Sunny up and put her on the gurney.

“Capture those orphans!” a doctor cried.

The two white-faced women smiled wickedly at Klaus and Sunny. “We’ll perform surgery on all three of you!” one of the women shouted causing Esme to facepalm.

Hal looked to them in disbelief. “What?” he asked. “No, the children will go to prison, of course.”

“Well, technically they’ll be in juvenile detention until they come of age,” the henchperson of indeterminate gender explained.

“Ridiculous!” the bald man cried. “They should be tried as adults.”

“Murderers should get the chair,” one white-faced woman argued.

“We’re talking about children,” Hal complained.

“Very small chairs, then,” the other white-faced woman commented as the troupe took another step towards the children.

“We can discuss the details after we arrest them,” a volunteer fighting disease cried.

“Yeah! Stop arguing and arrest them!” another cried.

“That’s what we’re doing, you fool!” Esme cried impatiently, but when she turned her head towards the two Baudelaire orphans and the drowsy Snicket girl they saw her wink. “We’re going to capture only one of you,” she said, in a quiet voice so the audience couldn’t hear her. She had her eyes focused on Klaus, who backed into Violet’s gurney causing the Snicket girl to shriek slightly.

Sunny turned towards Violet. “Shhhh, it’s okay,” she whimpered to the drowsy Violet as she pets her hair softly.

Esme smiled as she glanced down at her stiletto shoes. “This in footwear isn’t just useful for making me look glamorous and feminine,” she explained as she took one of her heels off and pointed it right at the children. “These stilettos are perfect for slitting children’s throats.” she hissed under her breath, taking a small step closer to Klaus, who adjusted the large, rusty knife in his hands. “The two bratty girl orphans will be killed while trying to escape from justice, leaving the one bratty, little Baudelaire boy to give us the fortune.”

“You’ll never get your hands on our inheritance,” Klaus cried. “Or your shoes at my sisters’ throats.”

Esme merely shrugged. “We’ll see,” she cried, as she swung her shoe at Klaus as if it were a sword. Klaus ducked quickly and felt the whoosh! Of the air as the blade swept over him. He glanced at Esme confused. She had just explained her intention to kill his sisters not him, so why was she swinging her shoes at him. It didn’t take Klaus long to realize what Esme was doing as he jumped back up onto his feet in hopes of protecting Violet and Sunny.

“ She’s trying to kill us!” Klaus cried desperately. “Can’t you see? These are the real murderers!”

“No one will ever believe you,” Esme said in a sinister whisper and swung her shoe at Sunny, who moved away just in time.

“I don’t believe you!” Hal cried. “My eyesight may not be what it used to be, but I could see that phony medical coat on the ground.”

“I don’t believe you either!” a nurse cried. “I can see that rusty knife!”

Esme swung her shoe towards the drowsy Violet this time, Klaus maneuvering Violet’s gurney out of the way in the nick of time. “Why don’t you surrender?” Esme hissed. “We’ve finally trapped you, just as you trapped Olaf all those other times.”

“When did we ever…” Klaus cried as he jumped back away from Esme’s attack.

“Now you know what it feels like to be a villain!” the bald man yelled. “Move closer, everyone! Mattathias told me whoever grabs them first gets to choose where to go for dinner tonight!”

Klaus looked at the group of villains in disbelief. He scanned towards the crowd looking for any friendly or helpful face. He frowned when he realized that no one was going to help them or stick up for the children. Esme could literally slit one of their throats and no one in this half-emptied crowd would bat an eyelash.

“Is that so?” the Hook-Handed Man asked. “Well I’m in the mood for pizza.” he swung a rubber-gloved hook at Klaus, who fell back against the gurney, rolling himself and his sister out of the evil man’s reach even if it was only a few inches.

“I feel more like Chinese food,” one of the white-faced women said. “Let’s go to that place where we celebrated the Quagmire and Baudelaire kidnapping.”

“I want to go to Cafe Salmonella,” Esme snarled.

Klaus pushed against the gurney again, wheeling it in the other direction as the circle of associates closed in on him and his sisters. He held the rusty knife up for protection as he listened to the whimpering of his younger sister and watched the restrained struggles of his elder sister. Klaus did not think he could use a weapon, even on people as wicked as these. Even if that dark thought had crossed his mind more than ten times in the last five minutes. He frowned when he realized that he was thinking just like Count Olaf. He shook his head slightly, he refused to be anything like Olaf. He knew if Count Olaf would have been trapped, he would not have hesitated to swing the rusty blade at the people who were surrounding him, but despite what the bald man had said, Klaus did not feel like a villain or rather, he didn’t want to feel like a villain. He didn’t want to feel a thing like Olaf. He refused to be the thing he hated the most. What Klaus did feel like though, was someone who needed to escape.

“Klaus...what do we do?” Sunny asked in a terrified whisper as the troupe and Esme took another step towards the kids.

“I...I don’t know, Sunny…” he admitted as he backed into his sister’s gurney again, he glanced down at Violet and then at Sunny, giving his younger sister a small smile, because he knew just how the three siblings were going to escape. “But a great mind once told me... there’s always something, ” he said as he smiled down at the drowsy Violet, who merely looked up at him with a face full of fear, disorientation, and confusion.

“Get back!” Klaus cried as he focused on the villains. “This knife is very sharp!”

“You can’t kill all of us,” the Hook-Handed Man replied. “In fact, I doubt you have the courage to kill anyone.”

“It doesn’t take courage to kill someone,” Klaus replied. “It takes a severe lack of moral stamina.”

“That is a wonderful way to describe your parents,” Esme commented, smirking.

“Wait...what…?”

“But I’m afraid, your fancy words won’t save you now, you twerp.” Esme snarled mockingly.

“That’s true,” Klaus admitted. “What will save me now is a bed on  wheels used to transport hospital patients,”

Without another word, Klaus tossed the rusty knife to the floor, startling Olaf’s associates into stepping back. Esme even dropped her stiletto shoe in shock. The circle of people with a severe lack of moral stamina was spread out a little more, just for a moment, but a moment was all the Baudelaires needed. Klaus gripped Violet’s gurney tightly and began to roll his sisters off the stage. Before he had a chance to jump on the gurney himself, he felt something sharp prying at his skin.

“Oh no, you don’t,” Esme hissed as she gripped Klaus’ arm tightly. Digging her stiletto nails into his skin as roughly as he could. The young boy cried out as the vile woman smirked. Klaus desperately tried to push the gurney that held his sisters away but Esme kept him in place.

“Please…” Klaus pleaded, forgetting that Esme was like Olaf and she had absolutely no humanity left within her.

“ Please…” Esme mocked, beginning to chuckle. “ You three aren’t going anywhere!” she hissed into Klaus’ ear as he continued to struggle to get the vile woman to let him go. Olaf’s troupe just stood stupidly around unsure of what to do. While more of the crowd had decided that exiting a burning hospital was a better idea then capturing three falsely-accused orphans. Although some of the crowd did stay to help capture the kids. “Olaf and I have plans for each of you…” Esme snarled as she glanced towards a terrified Sunny who sat at the foot of Violet’s gurney. “Ain’t that right, babylaire?”

Sunny looked to the confused and struggling Violet to the terrified and struggling Klaus and then at the smirking bitch who held them in place. Sunny grimaced and shook her head, a faint attempt to get Olaf’s and Esme’s voices out of her head as she began to remember the cruel, vicious details of the villain’s plot to murder her and her siblings. Sunny began to shake where she sat as Esme gripped Klaus’ arm tighter. Klaus grimaced and groaned in pain as he glanced towards Sunny with pleading eyes. Sunny felt a knot in her stomach, knowing the last time that she had used her teeth to help someone it had ended badly for her. She remembered the muzzle, the beating, the drugging. Even the time she bit Olaf to get him to release Klaus which resulted in her own kidnapping. Fear was paralyzing her to her core. But then Sunny remembered what Olaf told her about what he had done to Klaus and she took another look at Violet, who was bruised and tied, and those factors alone shattered Sunny’s fear and replaced it with pure hatred.

“ Let’s go, brats. Maybe if you’re lucky, we’ll wait until the girl wakes up to dispose of the brats we don’t need,” Esme hissed in Klaus’ ear, loud enough for Sunny to hear. Sunny glared at the woman before shakily standing up on the gurney and running towards the vile woman with each wobbly step, she caused the gurney that held her and her older sister to shake.

Violet shook her head from side to side, faster than before but still, her movements were halted by the anesthetic. “The...earth’s...ending!” Violet shouted.

Sunny reached her destination as she bit Esme’s wrist as hard as she could causing the woman to let go of her brother and scream in pain.

“ You vile beast!” Esme hissed. “ The baby bit me!”

Sunny quickly sat down as Esme gripped her own arm. Klaus took this opportunity to turn towards the villainess, giving her a rough shove which caused her to plummet to the ground, effectively breaking the stiletto shoes that she was still wearing. Esme crashed into the ground with a growl as she reached for Klaus’ pant leg. But it was too late, she gripped onto the air because the children were already running out of the operating theater.

A cry rose from the remaining audience as the Baudelaires sped past Olaf’s associates. Esme screamed a high pitched shriek causing several people to cringe and cover their ears. “ AFTER THEM YOU IMBECILES!” she screeched to the troupe who then realized what had just happened and began running after the children in hot pursuit.

“They won't get away from me!” Hal cried as he gripped the side of Violet’s gurney.

“Hal... please.” Klaus whimpered as the gurney slowed to a halt.

“You destroyed my library!” Hal cried defensively.

Both Klaus and Sunny glanced behind them and then Sunny glanced back at the old man. Butterflies fluttered in the youngest Baudelaire’s stomach as Hal glared at her from behind his tiny glasses. Unlike Olaf’s associates, Hal was not an evil person, well as far as they know. My research says otherwise. He merely was someone who loved the Library of Records and was trying to capture the people he believed had set it on fire, and it pained Sunny to see that he thought she was an evil criminal, instead of an unlucky toddler. But she knew she did not have time to explain to Hal what had really happened. She scarcely had time to say a single word, and yet that is precisely what the youngest Baudelaire orphan did.

“Sorry,” Sunny said to Hal and gave him a big smile. Then she opened her mouth a little wider and bit Hal’s hand as gently as she could so that he would let go of the gurney without getting hurt. Which is the exact opposite thing she did to Esme.

“Ow!” Hal whined. “The baby bit me!”

“ Join the club!” Esme screamed as she began to stand up. Klaus rolled his sisters out of the door, he stopped pushing as Violet shook her head left and right trying to move the hair out of her eyes. Sunny looked at her brother with confusion but then understood what he was doing when he grabbed a mop and successfully barricaded the door to the operating theater. Klaus gripped onto his sister’s gurney once more as Olaf’s troupe reached the door and were trying to use their combined weight and strength to break Klaus’ barricade. Klaus didn’t stick around long enough to find out just how handy this idea was because he began racing down the hallway.

“Oh no no no,” Klaus cried as he took a quick glance behind him. He tried to run faster than before, he glanced down at Violet who was shaking her head still. She squinted up at him, her face was unreadable. Klaus could see that his sister’s eyes weren’t focusing. Sunny leaned closer to Violet to brush her sister’s hair from her face gently.

Klaus was running fast enough to when he reached the first corner, he skids around it rapidly, nearly losing his footing. He glanced towards the direction that he had just come from and he could see Olaf’s troupe running and chasing him.

“Don’t let them get away!” The hook-handed man yelled. “Tackle them!”

“This is like PE class all over again!” The Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender whined.

“Tell me about it!” Klaus called back to them, remembering Olaf’s cruel scheme back at Prufrock.

“Stop! Murderers!” a doctor behind the troupe called out.

“Weeeeeeeeeee,” Violet cried as she jerked her wrists up trying to clap in excitement. Violet’s wrists made a harsh, loud impact as her restraints caught her limp arms. Her eyes rounder her sockets as she looked at Klaus confused. “Where….what….am I….?” she asked, her voice ringing of utter confusion.

Klaus and Sunny glanced at one another worriedly. “Sunny, start biting through her restraints,”

Sunny merely nodded as she began to chew through the leather belt that was around her sister’s wrists and ankles.

“Attention!” announced Olaf’s voice.

“ Oh, would you just shut the fuck up! ” Klaus yelled towards the intercom as loudly as he could, utterly frustrated with Olaf’s bullshit.

“This is Mattathias, the Head of Human Resources! The murderous arsonist orphans are escaping on a gurney! Capture them at once! Also, the fire is spreading throughout the hospital! You might want to evacuate!”

“Hurry!” Sunny cried. As Sunny broke through one of Violet’s restraints, the two Baudelaires watched happily as Violet slowly lifted up her wrist, but their happiness soon turned into horror when they realized she was unable to hold it up for too long and the two younger siblings watched as their older sister’s wrist fell limp on the side of the gurney, dangling lifelessly.

“I’m going as fast as I can!” Klaus cried, trying to increase his speed. Klaus steered the gurney and ran as fast as his legs could carry him while Sunny held on for dear life as she worked on freeing her older sister. “ Violet, wake up, please! ” he cried, his voice thick with tears of desperation. “ I can’t do this…”

“I’m...try...ing….” Violet muttered, squinting around her. The anesthesia made everything seem faint and foggy, and it was almost impossible for her to speak, let alone move.

“ Try harder, please.” Klaus pleased. “You can help push.”

Sunny just glanced at him with bewilderment. “She can’t push,” Sunny told her brother, Klaus merely rolled his eyes and ignored Sunny.

“Violet…” Klaus called out as he continued to push the gurney. Violet’s eyes flickered open and closed. “The hospital’s on fire…and I don’t know what to do!” he cried in a panicky voice.

Violet only smiled a goofy smile up at him. “Y-you...came...back...for...for me?” her own voice was drowsy from the anesthetic but she was choking on her own tears.

Klaus and Sunny looked at one another and then at her. “Why wouldn’t we?” Klaus asked.

“Sister!” Sunny yelled.

Violet, still a bit woozy from the anesthetic, slowly glanced around as Sunny freed her other wrist, she put her gentle, limp hand on Sunny’s head, smiling at her. Tears falling from her eyes. “...you...you both...came back,” she said happily, her demeanor immediately changing to sadness. “B-b-but...but...O-Olaf...s-s-said you...left…” she cried, trying to use her limp hand to wipe away her tears, but every attempt was slow and never truly wiped away the entire tear. Sunny smiled at her big sister and leaned closer to wipe Violet’s tears from her eyes.

“Fuck what Olaf said!” Klaus shouted. “We would never leave you!” Klaus felt a little insulted that Violet would believe Olaf when he had told this blatant lie but he also could fault Violet, who knew what she had been through and for how long she had been drugged. Maybe she is only believing what Olaf had said because she was high on the knockout drugs. Klaus was cautiously running through the burning hospital, still panicked beyond belief. He understood why Violet was a bit distracted but he would much rather have this discussion when he and both of his sisters were out of danger.  

Sunny smiled down at her sister. “Ohana.” the toddler stated and Klaus knew that this needed no translation even to a very disoriented Violet. Violet smiled at her baby sister as Sunny pulled Violet’s locket from around her neck. “We love you, too,” Sunny said, as she put the locket around Violet’s neck gently.

The troupe was hot on their tails as the children passed another group of confused nurses and doctors. “Those must be those murderers Mattathias was talking about!” one cried. “Let’s help those other doctors capture them!”

Klaus steered the gurney around a corner, as several more hospital staff joined the chase. “Violet...we’re in trouble…”

“I...get...that…”

“Wake up,” Klaus begged Violet, who was looking around her in a confused way. “ Please, Violet!”

“Door!” Sunny shrieked as Violet limply grabbed Sunny in hopes of shielding her of any danger as Klaus pushed the gurney through the doors. Once the children were through the doors, Klaus was about to go down a specific hallway until the children caught a glimpse of bright orange flames.

“...what’s...that…?” Violet asked confused, gazing towards the bright orange flames until she couldn’t see them anymore. Sunny took this time to carefully crawl down to Violet’s ankles where she could see her sister had also been restrained. Sunny quickly began chewing through a third of Violet’s restraints until she heard a snap! Of the leather fabric. Sunny smiled as she crawled to the other side and began working on the final restraint.

“I told you there’s a fire and I need your help to escape,” Klaus pleaded.

“F...fire?” Violet repeated. “...where?”

“Here. In the hospital,”

“W-why...are...are we...in...a hos...pital?”

“That’s a rather long and depressing story,” Klaus said. “It’s also not important…” Klaus smiled at Sunny when he saw her sit up and give him two thumbs up, her way of indicating that Violet was no longer restrained.

“Get back here you brats!” the bald man yelled.

Klaus continued to push the gurney that carried his sisters as he watched frantic hospital staff run right past him, more concerned about finding safety than capturing the children. Klaus pushed every empty gurney he passed behind him in hopes of slowing down the angry mob.

“Stairs!” Sunny yelled, pointing to a staircase. Klaus turned the gurney in the direction his sister indicated. Sunny’s eyes widened with fear once she realized what her brother might be doing. She quickly crawled back closer to Violet and him, preferring to be on that side of the gurney if she was right about what Klaus was planning.

“Sunny, hold on,” Klaus cried as he jumped on to the back of the gurney holding on for dear life as Sunny took the opportunity of grabbing onto both Klaus and Violet, her way of attempting to keep them from falling off. The children began to roll down the stairs, bouncing up and down with each step. It was a fast, slippery ride that reminded Klaus of playgrounds that he would visit with his parents when he was younger. At a curve in the staircase, Klaus scraped his shoes against the floor to stop the gurney, and then leaned over to look at one of the hospitals’ confusing maps.

“I’m trying to figure out if we should go through that door,” he said, pointing at a door marked ‘Ward for People with Nasty Rashes’. “Or continue down the staircase.”

“We can’t go down,” Sunny cried as she pointed a finger downward. Klaus looked and even Violet managed to focus enough to look down where Sunny was pointing. Down the staircase, just past the next landing, was a flickering, orange glow, as if the sun was rising out of the hospital basement, and a few wisps of dark black smoke were curling up the staircase like the tentacles of some ghostly animal. It was an eerie sight that had haunted the two younger Baudelaires in their dreams, ever since that fateful day at the beach when all their trouble began and had only haunted Violet since she had been sent to Prufrock. For a moment, the three children were unable to do anything but stare down at the orange glow and the tentacles of smoke, and think about all they had lost because of what they were looking at.

“Fire,” Violet cried faintly.

“Yes,” Klaus sighed. “It’s spreading up this staircase. We’ve got to turn and go back upstairs.”

From upstairs, the orphans listened to Olaf’s troupe members arguing.

“No up,” Sunny said.

“I can see that,” Klaus replied. He gave a low growl as he turned his sisters’ gurney towards the door marked ‘Ward for People with Nasty Rashes’, having made this rash decision, Klaus turned the gurney and wheeled it through the door, just as his favorite person began speaking over the intercom.

“Fuck you!” Sunny screamed at the intercom.

“This is Mattathias!” he said hurriedly. “All associates of mine, continue to search for those children! Everyone else, gather in front of the hospital! Either we will catch those murderous orphans as they escape, or like their pesky parents ... they’ll be burned to a crisp! ” The children shuddered as they all listened to the unhinged madman laugh into the intercom microphone once more. Laughing as though he was a Disney villain who had just momentarily won against the protagonist.

Klaus and Sunny looked at each other worriedly when they watched Violet shudder. She slowly wrapped her arms around herself. “I-I...I don’t….l-like...fires,” she admitted softly, not looking either sibling in the eye. “...I...lost...m-my....dad...in a….f-f-fire,”

Klaus frowned as Sunny merely nodded. “We know. We did, too, sis.” Klaus cried.

“Have each other,” Sunny explained.

The children’s eyes got wide when they heard Olaf’s troupe members once again approaching. Klaus rolled his sisters’ gurney into the Ward for People with Nasty Rashes and saw that Mattathias was right. The gurney was racing down a hallway, and the children could see another orange glow at the far end of it.

“...no…” Violet whimpered. The children heard another brief argument behind them as Olaf’s associates lumbered down the stairs. The three siblings were trapped in the middle of a hallway that led only to a fiery death or Olaf’s clutches.

Klaus started breathing heavily as he was trying to weigh his options in his head. While Violet wrapped her limp arms around Sunny. Klaus leaned down and stopped the gurney. “We’d better hide,” he said, jumping to the floor. “It’s too dangerous to be rolling around like this.”

“Where?” Sunny asked desperately, as Klaus helped Violet sit up on the gurney. Klaus quickly took Sunny from Violet’s arm and set her on the ground.

“Someplace close by,” Klaus said, grabbing Violet’s arm. “The anesthesia is still wearing off, so Violet can’t walk too far.”

“I’ll...try…” Violet murmured, stepping unsteadily off the gurney and leaning onto Klaus. Sunny glanced around nervously for a hiding place. Her eyes quickly caught a door that read ‘Supply Closet’ and even if Sunny Baudelaire wasn’t the best reader, she still pointed her small finger towards the door.

“Over there!” Sunny cried as she raced towards the supply closet and opening it up.

“I guess so,” Klaus said doubtfully as he leaned Violet up against the wall. Violet began sliding down the moment that she was left to stand on her own. Klaus quickly turned towards the now empty gurney that Olaf had used to restrain his older sister. He gripped the gurney and waited until he saw the angry mob running towards him. He pushed the gurney with all his might towards the crowd that was trying to help Olaf capture the children. The gurney hit Brandon with enough force that it caused him to fall to the ground, wincing at the pain that had been afflicted on him.

Klaus hurried back to his older sister, who was practically napping on the floor. “Come on, Vi. This way. This way.”  He dragged the limp Violet towards the supply closet as he gripped the doorknob with one hand while balancing his sister with the other. “I don’t know what we can do in a supply closet, but at least it’ll hide us for a few moments.”

Klaus helped his older sister through the door, immediately slamming the door behind him and locking it. Except for a small window in the corner, the closet looked identical to the one where Klaus and Sunny had hidden to decipher the anagram in the patient list. It was a small room, with only one flickering lightbulb hanging from the ceiling, and there were rows of white medical coats hanging from hooks, a rusty sink, huge cans of alphabet soup, cases of surgical tubing, and small boxes of rubber bands, and a small chair. But as the two younger Baudelaires looked at these supplies, they did not look like devices for translating anagrams or impersonating medical professionals. Klaus and Sunny looked at all these objects, and then at their older sister. To their relief, Violet’s face was a bit less pale, and her eyes were a bit less confused, which was a very good sign. The eldest of the three orphans needed to be as awake as she could be, because the items in the closet were looking less and less like supplies and more and more like materials for an invention.

You see, when Violet Snicket was five years old, she won her first invention contest with an automatic rolling pin she’d fashioned out of a broken window shade and six pairs of roller skates. As the judges placed the gold medal around her neck, she could remember her father saying, “I bet you could invent something with both hands tied behind your back.” and the judges agreed while Violet smiled proudly. She knew, of course, that her father and the judges did not mean that they were going to tie her hands behind her back and watch as she tried to invent something, but merely that she was so skilled at inventing that she could probably build something even with substantial interference, a phrase which here means ‘something getting in her way’.

The young Snicket girl had proved the judges and her father right dozens of times, of course, inventing everything from a lockpick to inventing a way to get herself and her younger brother out of jail back in the Village of Fowl Devotees with the substantial interference of being in a hurry and not having the right tools. But violet thought she had never had as much substantial interference as the lingering effects of anesthesia as she squinted at the objects in the supply closet and tried to focus on what her siblings were saying.

“Violet,” Klaus cried worriedly, watching Violet shakily push her hair behind her ear. Klaus couldn’t tell if she was shaking from anxiety and fear or if she was cold seeing that she was now barefoot and all she wore was a hospital gown. “I know that the anesthesia hasn’t completely worn off, but we need you to try to invent something...I can’t...last time I...I invented...something...he…he...” Klaus said as he closed his eyes slowly beginning to shake, placing his arms across his chest.

“Shhhh…” Violet cooed for longer than she wanted because her brain felt like mush and she forgot what she was focusing on. “...I...know,” she said faintly, rubbing her eyes with her hands slowly in a desperate attempt to focus her eyes.

“We’ll...we will...help you all we can,” Klaus said as he slowly began to calm down.

“My teeth are at…” Sunny chimed in, showing off her sharp teeth. “At your service.”

“Just tell us what we need to do,” Klaus cried.

“T-tell me….again...wha...what’s hap...pen...ning?” Violet asked, her head spinning as she slowly slid down the wall she was leaning on. Klaus ran to Violet’s aide hurriedly standing her up and sitting her down in the chair that Sunny had pushed towards her older siblings.

“The fire is consuming this entire hospital, and we have to get out of here quickly!,” he cried desperately as the henchperson of Indeterminate Gender, Brandon, and a few others from the angry mob began to knock on the door. “Oh and not only is Olaf after us, but another angry mob who thinks we’re criminals are right outside this door.”

Klaus ran towards the door to push his back against it, hoping to keep the mob out of the supply closet. He was well aware that he had already locked the door but he felt more secure pressing his weight against the door.

“Open up in there!” the Henchperson cried as the knocking ceased.

“What? No!” Klaus cried, giving an incredulous face towards the mere thought of surrendering now.

“Please,” the henchperson cried as they began to knock on the door once.

“ Violet! ” Klaus cried. “Right now would be a really good time for one of your plans!”

“Brain blast!” Sunny cried desperately.

“Wait, I thought I was Jimmy Neutron,” Klaus asked confused.

“Eh, you both are,” Sunny replied, with a shrug of her shoulders.

Violet slowly leaned back in the chair, pointing a limp finger at the window. “Open...the window,” she directed as Klaus gazed from the locked door to the window. He sighed as he ran towards the window opening it.

“Now what?” he asked.

“H-how...high...are we?” Violet asked, giggling slightly.

The middle orphan glanced outside. “It looks like we’re on the third floor, maybe the fourth. That’s probably around thirty or forty feet, I think,” he responded. “There’s so much smoke in the air, so it’s hard to tell. We’re not so high up, but we’re too high to jump.”

“Climb?” Sunny asked.

“There’s an intercom speaker right below us,” Klaus explained. “I suppose we could hang on to that and climb down to the bushes below, but we’d be climbing in front of a huge crowd…”

He turned to Violet, whose eyes were slowly closing, he could tell by how she strained her face that she was desperately trying to keep her eyes open. Klaus looked to Sunny worriedly. “ Vi, please,” he cried. “I hate to pressure you...but...I can’t do this without you,” he felt tears forming in his eyes.

“Can you invent something that can make us fly?” Sunny asked slowly.

Violet frowned and closed her eyes, slowly shaking her head. “S-sorry...no...fairy...dust here…” she cried.

“Violet?” Klaus called out, after a moment of watching his sister keep her eyes closed. “You’re not falling asleep, are you?” he asked gently but frantically.

“No,” she replied. “I’m...thinking.” she sighed. “We...need...to distract...the crowd...before...we...climb down,”

The two younger orphans nodded as Violet pointed a finger towards her brother. “Open...those...boxes...of rubber...bands. String them...together...to make...a cord,”

Klaus looked down and watched the volunteers giving evacuated hospital patients balloons. “But how will that distract the crowd?”

“I...don’t...know…” Violet admitted and looked to the floor. “I...I can’t...do this,”

Klaus and Sunny’s eyes widened when Violet said that. “Yes you can,” Sunny cried.

“I’m having...trouble...focusing...my...inventing...skills,” she admitted as her eyes filled to the brim with tears. “I’m...sorry,” Violet shakily tried to reach into her pocket until she realized she didn’t have any pockets. She began to shudder as she sat. Remembering her time as Olaf’s captive and how he had forced her to change from her overalls to the hospital gown. “He...he...he...he took my...last...ribbon…”

“Help,” Sunny said, as she walked over to her big sister.

“Don’t cry for help, Sunny,” Klaus said miserably. “No one will help us,”

“Help,” Sunny insisted as the youngest orphan grabbed a hold of one of the medical coats that hung on the coat rack. She opened her mouth wide and she bit down on the fabric, ripping a small strip off the coat with her teeth. Then she held up the strip of white cloth and handed it to Violet. “Ribbon,” Sunny explained as Violet gave her baby sister a weary smile. With unsteady fingers, the eldest orphan tied her hair up to keep it out of her eyes, using the thin strip of fabric instead of her hair ribbon. She closed her eyes again, and then slowly nodded.

“I know...it’s silly…” she admitted. “But...it helps,” she placed a shaky, pale hand on Sunny’s head. “Thank...you...Sunny,”

The eldest orphan sighed as she strained her face still trying to overcome the effects of the anesthetic. “Klaus...get to work...on the...rubber...bands. S-Sunny...can you open….one of these...soup cans?”

“Yes, I opened some,” Sunny began. “Earlier to help Klaus.”

Violet smiled at the toddler. With her hair up in a ribbon, even if the ribbon was spurious, her voice sounded a bit stronger and more confident than it had before, although both siblings could tell she was still disoriented. “We need...an...empty...can...asap,”

The three siblings worked quickly. Klaus opened a box of rubber bands and began tying them together using the Devil’s Tongue Knot. Sunny began to gnaw at the top of a can of soup and Violet slowly scooted her chair towards the small sink and splashed water in her face to try to make herself as alert as possible. Finally, Klaus had a long cord of rubber bands curled at his feet like a snake, Sunny had taken the top off a can of soup and was quickly pouring the contents of the can down the sink, and Violet was staring anxiously at the bottom of the closet door, from which a very thin wisp of smoke was crawling through.

“The fire...is...getting...closer,” she alerted her siblings. Even with the fire closing in on the orphans, the crowd outside the door hadn’t left and continued to bang on the door. Klaus imagined if it were any other henchperson who had found the children, that door would be torn off the hinges by now so Klaus was happy that it was the Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender who was leading the angry mob.

“The cord is all ready,” Klaus cried. Violet merely frowned.

“Not...long...enough,” she cried, looking around.

“Tube?” Sunny asked as she pulled a long piece of surgical tubing out of a bin that was placed on a few of the shelves in the supply closet.

Violet merely nodded. “It’ll...have...to...do. Klaus...tie...our cord...and the...tube...together,”

Klaus looked at his sister confused but followed her orders. “Are you sure you tied your hair tight enough? How can we distract a crowd with an empty soup can?”

“Incompetent,” Sunny chimed in which meant, “I mean I know they are all incompetent and unhelpful as Mr. Poe but I don’t think they are all stupid enough to be distracted by an empty soup can.”

Klaus quickly translated for Violet. Violet gave a light giggle. “It’s not...an...empty...soup can. Well...not...anymore,” she explained slowly. “Now...it’s...a spurious...intercom. Sunny...poke one...hole in….the bottom...of the can,”

“Wha?” Sunny replied in complete and utter confusion, but she did as her elder sister asked because Sunny trusted Violet wholeheartedly even if she didn’t understand the point. Sunny knew that Violet’s inventive skills had helped save her, herself, and their brother before. So she quickly poked a hole in the bottom of the can using her sharpest tooth.

“Now...Sunny and I...are going...to hold...this near...the window…” she explained. “But we...must...make sure...the crowd...doesn’t see it…”

“I don’t follow,”

“The crowd...has to...think your...voice...is coming...from the...intercom.”

“My voice?”

“I...can’t...I’m too...drowsy...and I...sound...nothing...like...Olaf,”

“I don’t either!” Klaus cried defensively.

Violet put a limp hand on Klaus’ shoulder. “I know...but...the crowd...will know...something’s...up...if I do...it,”

Klaus sighed but nodded his head. Violet and Sunny held the empty can near the window, and Klaus leaned in and stuck his head inside it as if it were a mask. The middle orphan took a deep breath to gather his courage, and then he began to speak. From inside the can his voice sounded scratchy and faint as if he was talking with a piece of aluminum foil over his mouth, which was precisely how Violet wanted him to sound.

“Attention!” Klaus announced. “This is Mattathias Medical-School, head of Human Resources.” he rolled his eyes as he continued. “The murderous orphans have been spotted in the unfinished wing of the hospital.” Violet smiled as she and Sunny gave him a thumbs up. “We require everyone’s assistance in making sure they do not escape. Please rush over there right away. That is all!”

Klaus pulled his head out of the can and looked at his sisters. “Do you think it worked?”

Sunny opened her mouth to answer but she was interrupted by the voice of Brandon Spats. “Did you hear that?” the children heard him say. “The criminals are over in the unfinished wing of the hospital! Come on, everyone.”

“Maybe some of us should stay here at the front entrance, just in case,” the children heard Hal suggest.

Klaus sighed as he stuck his head back into the can that his sisters were holding. “Attention! This is Mattathias! No one should stay at the front entrance of the hospital! It’s too dangerous! Proceed at once to the unfinished wing. That is all.”

The three children snuck glances outside the window as the crowd slowly began to walk away from the front of Heimlich Hospital.

“It...worked,” Violet cried in disbelief. “We...fooled them…”

“We’re as good at tricking people as Olaf is,” Klaus commented, a frown forming on his face. “And at disguises...we fooled everyone but him,”

“Anagrams,” Sunny added.

“And lying...to...people,” Violet cried, thinking of Hal, the shopkeeper at Last Chance General Store and all the Volunteers Fighting Disease.

Klaus sighed. “Maybe we’re becoming villains after all,”

“No!” Sunny shrieked. “Don’t say that.”

“We’re...not...villains…” Violet countered, even if her gut feeling was saying something completely different. “We had...to do...tricky...things...in order...to save...our lives.”

“Olaf has to do tricky things,” Klaus countered. “To save his life,”

“Different,” Sunny argued.

Violet merely frowned. “Maybe...Klaus...is right. Maybe...it’s...not...different.” Violet said sadly. “Maybe…”

Violet was interrupted by the Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender sighing angrily and now using a fire extinguisher to break down the door that separated them from the three terrified and morally grey orphans.

“We can discuss this later,” Klaus said. “We have to get the fuck out of here!”

“Climb?” Sunny asked, looking at the rubber bands and surgical tubing.

“We’re not...climbing...we’re...bouncing,” Violet explained.

“What!?” Klaus cried.

“Bounce?” Sunny asked doubtfully.

Violet merely nodded. “Klaus, tie...our rope...to this pipe,” she said, pointing to a pipe that was located right next to the door. “This way...it breaks...our fall,”

“Is this safe? ” Klaus asked, taking another look out the window and feeling anxious about his sister’s plan and how high they are.

“Plenty...of...people...bounce from...high...places on long...rubbery...cords...for fun,” violet said. “So...we can...do it...to escape,”

Klaus sighed. “I don’t know...this sounds risky,” he cried. “For one...I doubt the cord is long enough.”

“Look...it is... risky,” Violet admitted. “But...not...as risky...as a fire,”

“Or Olaf,” Sunny added nervously.

The Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender continued to pound on the door of the supply closet with the fire extinguisher. Black smoke was beginning to pour through the crack as if the henchperson was pouring ink into the closet. Even the air outside was unsettling and filled with smoke. Klaus sighed and hurriedly tied the cord to the pipe and then tugged on it to make sure it was secure.

“Okay...who’s...going...first?” Violet asked drowsily. She was leaning against the wall again since she didn’t have all the feeling in her legs back yet.

“First?” Sunny asked, confused.

Klaus merely gave her a look of utter disbelief.

“Fine...you two...are nervous.” Violet cried, shrugging her shoulders. Assuming that her siblings’ issue was the invention’s safety and not her insisting they take turns. “I...invented...it, so I’d...better...test it.”

“No,” Klaus said simply.

“Then...go first,” Violet said.

“We’re not taking turns, Vi!”

“Together,” Sunny explained.

“If we...all...go down...together,” Violet said. “I’m...not sure...the cord will...hold,”

“Tough shit,” Klaus replied.

“Fine,” Violet cried. “ Sunny, will...go first...then,”

Klaus growled and rushed over to Violet, seemingly irritated with his older sister. He grabbed her harshly by the shoulders, she fell slightly in his grasp which made him instantly regret rushing up to her. But he knew he had to drive a point across. He gripped her shoulders and shook her a bit. The way she was limp from the anesthetic made it look like Klaus was harshly shaking his sister but Sunny knew that wasn’t the case. “ Listen to me very carefully, Vi!” he hissed. “ There is no first! We are not separating ever again!” Violet stared back at him, he could still tell that she couldn’t entirely focus on anything. “ This family sticks together!” he yelled causing her to start to tear up. “ We are not splitting up!”

“But...but...b-but…” she sniffled. “Snickers...Snick...S-Snickets...take care...of...their own.” she reasoned as she put a shaky hand on her locket.

Sunny merely looked up at Violet. “So do Baudelaires.”

Violet only shook her head. “B-but...Olaf...Olaf said…”

Klaus jumped when it sounded like the Henchperson was finally creating damage against the door. “Goddammit, Vi! Fuck Olaf! I hope he fucking burns to death in this fire!” Klaus cried as he released his grip on sister but kept a gentle hand on her shoulder. “ Especially if he hurt you.” Klaus frowned as he said it, purposely emphasizing the word ‘hurt’ to try to hint at Olaf’s disgusting, vile behavior towards Violet that was different from his behavior towards Klaus and Sunny. Violet looked towards Klaus and then to Sunny, eventually frowning and softly shaking her head and giving a small shrug in response.

There was an uncomfortable silence between the three siblings until Violet turned towards both Klaus and Sunny. “It won’t...support all...of us,” she explained.

“We’re not leaving anyone behind,” he said firmly. “Not this time. Either we all escape, or none of us do.”

“But if...none of...us do,” Violet said tearfully. “Then there...won’t be...anyone left...Olaf will...have won.”

Klaus shook his head as he reached into his pockets and pulled out one of the old photographs that he and Sunny had retrieved back when they lived at their Aunt Josephine’s. Klaus unfolded it and his sisters could see it was a photograph taken some years before Violet was even born. In the middle of the photograph, just like the one hidden in the depths of Lemony Snicket’s wallet, stood three people. All smiling and holding each other's hands. Klaus pointed first towards the tall, skinny man with glasses, then he pointed to a brown-haired woman who wore a fierce smile as she held the hands of the men she loved, and then finally he pointed to a man who wore a frown on his face, and a fedora and trenchcoat in hopes of masking his identity. “Jacques Snicket...your uncle...said there was a survivor of a recent fire ,” Klaus explained, his voice thick with tears.

Violet’s eyes widened. “The film...do you...still...have it?”

“No...we had to give it to Esme to save you,” he explained. “But that’s not important.” he looked from his little sister to his big sister. “We have to survive and find them. All of us . We all deserve to see who the survivor is. We all deserve that happy ending we’ve been wanting for a while now.” the middle orphan began to tear up. As his guilt began to surface. “and I’d rather die than lose either one of my sisters... again.” The bookworm quickly wiped away a few of his tears. “I can’t...I won’t let him take either of you, again.”

Klaus looked down at Sunny and then to Violet. She stood shakily before him in a mere hospital gown and she was bruised. Her cheeks were still red, her wrists and ankles had severe chafing from her struggling against her restraints, that they were either raw or simply pink. “I’m so sorry, Violet.” Klaus cried.

“Not your fault,” Sunny said as she watched Violet struggle to speak.

He looked down at Sunny. “I’m so sorry to you, too, Sunny. He only got you because you were protecting me. You both...were protecting me when he took you . ” he cried.

“Not your fault,” Sunny reassured. “I’d do it again...in a heartbeat,”

Violet nodded slowly in agreement.

The three siblings were tearing up as the Henchperson created the beginnings of a hole in the wall.

“Go time,” Sunny cried. “Escape now. Feelings later.”

“Agreed,” the two older siblings cried, although Violet sounded dizzier than Klaus.

Klaus picked up Sunny as Violet held the surgical tubing up so Klaus could spin himself and Sunny, effectively wrapping the tubing around the two siblings. He glanced towards Violet. “ We are going to survive...and find out what happened. We’ll find the survivor and either bring Olaf to jail...or kill him.”

“Down for murder,” Sunny cried.

“I...still...think if...we take...turns,” Violet protested frantically. “There’s a...better chance...that one of us...will survive.”

“All or nothing,” Sunny cried.

“We’re not leaving anyone behind,” Klaus said firmly. “ That’s what makes us different from Olaf and Esme.”

“ Ohana,” Sunny cried as she reached out and pulled the front of Violet’s hospital gown. The eldest orphan was still so limp that her minuscule effort succeeded and Violet now leaned on her and their brother. “ Just us,” she told Violet as Klaus wrapped a tight arm around both of his sisters as he slowly spun Violet around with them as he inched towards the window.

Violet didn’t fight. She didn’t struggle. She leaned in closer to her siblings feeling their warmth against her cold arms. “You’re right,” she said finally.

The hole in the door got even bigger as Violet shrieked.

“Don’t worry, Vi. We’re not leaving you behind again,” Klaus told her. Violet nodded as she did her best to wrap her arms tightly around her two younger siblings.

“I’ll...hold...on...to...you,” she explained.

“Same here,” Sunny cried as she wrapped her tiny arm around the arm that carried her and forced her tiny hand into her sister’s.

As Klaus carried his sisters to the window, he looked down once more, immediately regretting his decision. He glanced at the rubber band cord that Violet had him make and then at the surgical tubing he had tied it, too, and had now wrapped a good chunk of it around the three siblings.

“If it’s forty feet, we won’t make it.” He predicted.

“If it’s...say...maybe...thirty…,’ Violet began as she followed Klaus’ gaze down.

“We might,” Sunny shrugged.

The three children carefully made their way out of the window onto the small platform that lay alongside the window.

The huddled siblings barely fit on the ledge as the siblings looked down. This was at the same time as Olaf’s henchperson had successfully broken a hole in the door.

“Here I am, Nurse Lucafont.” the Henchperson called inside the empty supply closet. Utterly confused as to how the supply closet was empty. The children could hear the henchperson’s voice and look at one another nervously and then looked back down.

“I’m scared,” Violet admitted drowsily.

“I’m frightened,” Klaus cried.

“Sheer terror,” Sunny chimed.

As if they were thinking the exact same thing, each of the siblings gripped onto their two siblings as tight as they could. Violet managed to shout, “Hold on tight!” as the three siblings leaped out of the window of Heimlich Hospital.

STOP!

I am alone this evening, and I am alone because of several cruel twists of fate, a phrase which here means that nothing has happened the way I thought it should. Once I was a content individual, with a comfortable home, loving family that I loved very much, and a plethora of bedtime stories that were too strange to have been true...but...all of those things have been taken away from me, and now the only trace I have of those happy days are the photos I store in my pockets. As I sit in this very tiny room, printing these words with this very large pen, I feel as if our lives have been nothing but some dismal play, and that the playwright who invented these cruel twists of fate is somewhere far above me, laughing and laughing at their creation. This is not a pleasant way to feel, but this is how my story goes.

Now, despite my extensive research and my associate’s knowledge of abandoned VFD libraries, there are many things in this world that I do not know. I do not know how butterflies get out of their cocoons without damaging their wings. I do not know why anyone would boil vegetables when roasting them is tastier. I do not know how to make olive oil, and I do not know why dogs bark before an earthquake, and I do not know why some people voluntarily choose to climb mountains where it is freezing and difficult to breathe or live in the suburbs, where the coffee is watery and all of the houses look alike. I do not know why people start or join cults and I do not know how some people let revenge consume them to a highly unhealthy degree. I do not know how some people are brave enough to follow their passion in a world set out to destroy them. And I sadly, do not know how to stop the disastrous domino effect or fucked up twists of fates that seem to be plaguing several lives.

As such, I do not know where Violet Snicket or the Baudelaires are now, or if they are safe or if they are even still alive. But there are some things that I do know, thanks to the extensive research I’ve done investigating these cases, and one of them is that the window of the supply closet in the Ward for People with Nasty Rashes of Heimlich Hospital was not thirty or forty feet off the ground, as Klaus had guessed.

It’s twenty, which is exactly one foot higher than the length of the cord, so when the children leaped into the smoky air, clinging to each other for dear life, Violet’s invention worked perfectly. Like a yo-yo, the children bounced gently up and down, brushing their feet against one of the bushes planted in front of the hospital, and after a few bounces, Sunny released her grip on her siblings, although they kept theirs, and chewed through the elastic surgical tubing, biting through it just in time to smack Olaf’s henchperson in the face as they looked out the window. When the surgical tubing broke, Violet and Klaus fell the rest of the way to solid ground, Violet nearly toppling over. Klaus quickly put Sunny down and focused more of his attention and strength on Violet.

“We...made...it,” Violet cried.

“It was a close call,” Klaus agreed.

“But we survived,” Sunny argued.

The three siblings looked behind them at the hospital and saw just how close of a call it had been. The building looked like a fiery ghost, especially more so in a few places, with great bursts of flame coming from the windows, and oceans of smoke pouring from great gaping holes in the walls. The children could hear glass shattering as the windows burned away, and the crackle of wood as the floors began to fall through in some areas of the hospital. It occurred to the three children that their own homes must have looked like this on the day it burned down, and the three siblings stepped back from the burning building and huddled together as the air grew thick with ashes and smoke, obscuring the hospital from view.

“Where can we go?” Sunny asked.

“I don’t know. But any minute now someone’s bound to recognize us or realize that we’re not in the unfinished half of the hospital.” Klaus cried.

Klaus, with one hand holding Sunny’s and the other dragging Violet, began to walk away from the forming crowd. As more and more people pushed passed the children, rushing out of the hospital.

“Act casual,” Klaus told his sisters, noticing that Violet was adding more and more of her weight on to him.

“I’m...trying.;.”

Klaus glanced towards an empty ambulance. He tried to drag his sisters towards it in hopes of hot wiring it and driving far away from Olaf. But EMTs had beat him to it and began loading patients aboard.

“Keep your eyes open for those murderous brats!” one nurse yelled.

“I’ll find them. I know I will.” a volunteer fighting disease assured.

Klaus heard this and redirected himself and his sisters as he hurried behind a small half wall behind a few bushes in the front of the hospital. He was thankful for all the smoke in the air, it made this pitiful hiding place better.

“Stay down,” Klaus explained. “In The Encyclopedia of Escaping Arson, the author wrote that there’s more oxygen closer to the ground, so we can breathe more easily down here. But we need to get to some kind of shelter right away.”

Violet and Sunny scooted as close to Klaus as they could. Hoping to shrink themselves. Klaus and Violet both edged their heads up, Violet slowly beginning to focus better, as they gazed around for any way to escape. Klaus looked towards the left and Violet glanced towards the right, the smoky air was making it a bit difficult to see everything clearly.

“Where is there shelter?” Sunny asked. “Hospital is only building for miles.”

“...and it’s burning to the ground…” Klaus cried sadly.

“You!” a voice called out in the smoke. The three orphans froze. They did not freeze because a random passerby had recognized them and was pointing them out. They froze because the voice that had called out from the smoke was a voice all three siblings heard in their nightmares. Klaus gripped tightly to both of his sisters as Sunny let out a whimper and Violet let out a soft squeal as she and Klaus ducked their heads back down.

“He...didn’t...see...us, right?”

“I hope not,” Klaus cried.

The three children stayed as low as they could as they listened in on the madman’s rage.

“You!” Olaf called again, this time slamming his hand on the hood of his car. “Hooks for hands!” Olaf barked. “This way!”

The siblings breathed a quick sigh of relief, realizing that Olaf had not been referring to them but instead one of his henchpeople. With this newfound knowledge, Sunny slowly crawled over Klaus and Violet to etch her head around the edge of the half wall. Where only one eye could see Olaf while the other’s vision was obstructed.

Sunny watched a long, black shape emerge from the smoky air, and she could see it was an automobile, pulling up in front of the hospital. Not too far from the children. An automobile is somewhat like a shelter, but the siblings froze on the ground and dared not crawl an inch farther toward that car.

“Hurry up Esme!” Olaf yelled. “Hurry up! Or I’ll leave you behind!”

“We’re coming, darling!” Esme cried out as she hurried towards the car.

“Can you see the car in the smoke?” he asked.

“Yes, darling,” she replied. “Open the trunk I’ll throw the costumes in.” The three children held their breath as they listened to her odd footsteps as she walked right passed them, towards and around Olaf’s car.

“Oh, alright,” Olaf sighed, and Sunny watched in silence as the tall figure of her enemy stepped out of his vehicle.

“Wait up, Olaf!” the bald man yelled.

“You fool! I told you to call me Mattathias until we leave the hospital grounds!” Olaf growled as he opened the trunk. He watched as Esme threw the costumes in. He merely glared at her.

“What?”

He sighed angrily. “You lost my pet and the Baudelaires!” She opened her mouth to argue but he merely shook his head. “ But... it’s not only that! ” he yelled as he punched the roof of his car angrily. Esme rolled her eyes dismissively as she rounded the car and took her seat next to Olaf.

“You know this is horrific!” Esme whined. “We never found the sugar bowl after that stupid librarian told me it would be here!”

Olaf rolled his eyes at the mention of the sugar bowl.

“It’s worse than that,” he hissed.

“I know, and the bratty orphans escaped again,” Esme said rolling her eyes.

“Oh, it’s very, very worse than that,” he hissed in annoyance.

Esme looked to Olaf confused. Olaf slowly turned towards Esme as he took a deep breath, grasping the steering wheel tightly. “ There may be a survivor of a recent fire,” he hissed as her eyes widened, and then her expression shifted to match her fiery glare as she thought of the woman who had stolen everything from her.

“ Beatrice…!” Esme cried through gritted teeth.

Violet gasped as she heard sirens approaching. “The...police...and fire...fight...ers are here,”

“If they already thought we were murderous kidnappers, now they’ll think we’re all arsonists.” Klaus reasoned. “We need an escape,”

“Do...you...do you trust...me?” Violet asked after a moment of staring hard at Olaf’s trunk. The trunk was opened to where Violet could see that the lid of the trunk was peppered with tiny holes, bullet holes, it looked like, undoubtedly from being pursued by the police.

“...yeah?” Klaus answered back hesitantly. It was no lie that he trusted Violet with his life but her asking worried him for a number of reasons.

Violet leaned as close as she could to her siblings so she could whisper to them without being heard. “We’ve...got...to go in...there,” she said.

“Where?” Klaus whispered in reply.

“We... need to get...in O-Olaf’s...tr-trunk,” Violet reasoned.

“ Wha?!” Sunny shrieked in a horrified whisper.

“Are you still that high off the knock out drugs?” Klaus asked as he and Sunny glanced at one another in disbelief as if there was no way Violet had suggested for the three siblings to voluntarily stuff themselves into Olaf’s trunk.

“Oh yeah,” Violet said giggling. She placed her hand in Klaus’ hair. “You’ve got...rainbow... hair.” She gently slapped Klaus’ face. “Like...a clown,”

“I can’t tell if you’re joking or serious,” Klaus replied in an annoyed tone.

“Doesn’t....matter. But that’s not...the point. We...have to avoid...getting cap...tured,” she said, her eyes rolling back slightly in her head. “and...find out...who the...survivor...is.”

“Getting in that trunk is getting captured!” Klaus argued.

Olaf took a deep breath and then glanced at one of his henchmen who stood outside of the car, looking around aimlessly. “Get in this car this instant! I’m leaving on the count of three! It’s been splendid setting this fire, but we’ve got to hunt down a certain...survivor...before those brats do!”

“Or VFD,” Esme added. “You know, the real VFD full of hypocrites, not those idiotic singers!”

“Just one second, boss. We’re waiting for Ainsley,” the Hook-Handed Man explained.

“I’m not going to wait around to find out if that fool lived or died!” Olaf yelled. “One!”

The Hook-Handed man tapped his hook worriedly on the roof of his boss’ car as he gazed around. Violet unknowingly lifted her head a bit until she felt as though the henchman had seen her and she ducked down worriedly.

“Y-you said you...trusted me,” Violet whined.

“I’d rather die than get into that fucker’s trunk!” Klaus hissed.

“Don’t you want to...bring him to justice?” Violet asked. “Don’t you...wanna find the...survivor? And clear...our names?”

Klaus looked to his sister, frowning. “Of course, I do. But I don’t want to die before we can!”

“No, no,” Sunny cried as she shook her head. “Been there...done that.”

Violet frowned as she placed her hands in her siblings and she held their hands as firmly as she could, to the point where it hurt to hang on to them. “Think of... everything... we survived together, ” she whispered, looking from her burdened brother to her scared sister. “We’ve lived through countless...unfortunate events...only to find ourselves... alone. ”

“Just us,” Sunny reminded her.

“I know…” Violet replied, smiling at Sunny. “But if one of...our parents...survived. It’ll all be worthwhile!” She released her grip on her siblings. “We have to find them...if it’s the last thing we do.”

Sunny sighed as she gazed at the gaping trunk, which looked like the mouth of some dark and smoky beast, eager to devour her and her siblings. As it had once devoured her and her friends, Duncan and Isadora Quagmire, not too long ago. But she knew her big sister was right and she trusted Violet to get her and her siblings out of danger, not in it. “You’re right,” Sunny murmured finally. “Getting in that trunk is our only hope.”

Violet smiled as she looked towards Klaus, who merely shook her head defiantly. “You’re right. You’re right about all of that. But I’m sorry, I’m not getting into that trunk.”

“Klaus...come on,” Sunny pleaded.

“What choice do we have?” Violet asked. “Trust me...I wish we had another escape...but we don’t, Klaus.”

“Violet, I am not getting in that trunk and there’s nothing you can do to convince me otherwise,” Klaus folded his arms across his chest. “You aren’t thinking straight, obviously. So I guess I’ll think of something.”

“ Two!” They heard Olaf shout to his henchpeople as the Hook-Handed Man smiled and rushed Ainsley into their boss’ car.

Klaus continued to shake his head at the sound of Olaf’s voice.

Violet rolled her eyes, tapped her finger on her chin deep in thought. She glanced at Sunny and a wicked smile grew on her face. “I...know..how to get...you in that trunk,”

“What did I just say?” Klaus asked. “I’m not getting in…” he began before Violet stood up shakily, picking up Sunny in the process and running stealthily towards Olaf’s trunk.

“No, you did not just…” Klaus cried angrily. “Dammit, Violet!” he hissed following her quickly, continuing to look behind the siblings to make sure that no one was following them.

Violet stumbled as she reached the trunk. She fell to the ground, shielding Sunny from the pavement. “Whoopsie,” she whispered.

Klaus catches up to his sisters and merely glares at Violet as the three crawl a few more inches to the trunk. “Of all the dirty handed tricks you could pull…” he started, in a hushed whisper.

“It got you over here...didn’t it?” Violet asked as she opened Olaf’s trunk slowly. The children ducked down low as the trunk lid stayed opening welcoming them inside with a damp, terrible odor that had Violet having second thoughts.

Violet stumbled awkwardly as she tried to maneuver herself into Olaf’s trunk while still kneeling down. “Give me a hand, please,” Violet begged her brother. Klaus sighed as he reluctantly helped Violet into the trunk.

“We’ll be able to breathe, right?” Sunny asked, worriedly as Violet rolled as far as she could allowing her brother and sister room. Violet felt her knee slam against something but she didn’t pay it any attention as she felt the shuffling of Olaf’s troupe member trying to get situated in the back seat.

“Yes,” Klaus whispered as he picked up Sunny. “Air will come through the bullet holes,” he explained to his baby sister as he laid her atop of their big sister. The second Sunny was laying down on Violet, she began to squirm and shake as if she were having a panic attack. Klaus frowned as he glanced down at Violet, who merely frowned back. Violet hastily unclasped her locket and handed it to Sunny.

“Sometimes when I’m scared…” Violet admitted. “The only thing that calms...me down. Is our Mama.” Violet shakily moved her hands to open the locket but she was having slight difficulties. Sunny reached up and opened the locket for her. Both sisters gazed up at the picture of their mother, smiling down on them.

Klaus sighed as he grabbed hold of the trunk. “This is not the sort of shelter I had in mind,” he said begrudgingly. “But...I guess it might do.”

“It’ll have to do,” Violet whispered to him. And with that, the middle orphan maneuvered himself inside his enemy’s trunk, beside his older sister.

“ Three!!” Olaf shouted as Violet simultaneously closed the trunk just as the bald man slammed the passenger back side door shut. Once Violet had closed the trunk, the siblings were left in utter darkness, and their shelter rattled and shook as Olaf started the engine and began to drive across the landscape, which was as flat and desolate as ever. But the children could not see outside, of course. In the blackness of the trunk, they could not see anything at all. Sunny whimpered and handed Violet back her locket.

“We’re right here, Sunshine,” Klaus whispered, trying to hide the fact that he, too, was terrified. They could only hear their long, shivering breaths as the air rushed through the bullet holes, and feel their shoulders tremble as they shivered in fear.

Klaus pulled Sunny a bit towards him so that she was now laying on both him and Violet and not squishing Violet entirely. Violet’s head rolled around as Olaf drove.

“Here,” Klaus whispered, prompting for Violet to lift her head. He placed his arm underneath his sister’s head giving her some comfort as Sunny grabbed onto Violet’s hand. Violet snuggled closer to her siblings still high on the anesthetic.

“You...guys came back...for me,” she cried, tears flowing.

“That’s what siblings do,” Sunny explained.

“You’re our sister,” Klaus agreed.

“Where to next, boss?’ the children could hear the Hook-Handed man ask.

“How the fuck would I know!?” Olaf yelled as he reached outside his window to remove a flyer that was obstructing his vision. “I’m not…”

He stopped once he read the flyer. “...a fortune teller. But I know who is,” he said wickedly as he began to laugh maniacally.

The children shifted slightly when Olaf slammed his foot on the gas. The three siblings huddled together as tightly as they could. Both Violet and Klaus held one of Sunny’s tiny hands. Both older siblings could feel their sister tremble as she laid on them inside Olaf’s trunk. They knew that she was having flashbacks of her time in captivity with the Quagmires. They were trying to do all they could to relax her.

As the three gazed outside the bullet holes of Olaf’s car, it was as if they were stargazing, although the siblings were all falling victim to their thoughts. Klaus sighed, breaking the silence.

“I guess...we’re still on the lam,” he whispered.

“We’re alive and...we’re together,” Violet countered.

Sunny held on tightly to her siblings’ hands trying to stay calm and not freak out that she had once again found herself inside Olaf’s trunk. The bitter stench was bringing back memories that Sunny would rather stay buried away from her psyche. She knew circumstances were slightly different, this time. She wasn’t forced into the trunk against her will, she had been persuaded by her elder sister to voluntarily enter the trunk. She had her siblings and she knew they would never let anyone hurt her and the biggest difference is that Olaf and Esme had no idea that she and her siblings were hitching a ride in his trunk.

Klaus’ eyes slowly began to fall as he slightly shifted. He was exhausted in more ways than one. But as he felt Violet shift her head slightly on his arm and Sunny grip tighter to his hand, he knew it was what he had to do. He didn’t know exactly what had happened to his sister during her time in Olaf’s clutches and he was scared that she might not know the answer and it pained him to know that Olaf was the only person that could give his sister closure on that topic. He sighed as quietly as he could. He wasn’t the happiest about how Violet convinced him to get into Olaf’s trunk but he would have to deal with it. Klaus was fighting the urge to sleep because he refused to be asleep if the children were discovered and he wouldn’t be able to fight for his sisters. He felt like he’s failed them so many times already, that he needs to step up his game and be there more for them. That’s what he vowed to do for his sisters and whoever the survivor was.

Violet held onto Sunny’s arm as she began to silently sob. She was still scared that they were now in the trunk of the man who wants to do nothing but harm them. She was still contemplating everything that had happened to her or what she suspected happened. Violet was unsure of a lot of things right now and how close she was to her siblings was one of them. In her head, Olaf and Esme’s words ring endlessly on a tiresome loop that was continually driving Violet insane. Violet still had huge insecurities but she was starting to doubt a few of her insecurities.

If what they said was true...Klaus had every chance to take Sunny and run...but they stayed. They rescued me. He kept himself and his sister in danger to save me . Why didn’t he take Sunny and run? She pondered to herself. She desperately hoped, Maybe just maybe Olaf was wrong and Klaus did see her as a sister, not just a protector.

Violet sighed, still coming down from the amount of anesthetic Olaf had administered to her. “What’s...that stanza...again?” she asked hastily.

“What?” Klaus whispered back, confused. His eyes were closed as if he had lost his fight against sleep.

“The Snicket lad?” Sunny whispered in the softest of whispers, terrified to see what Olaf would do if he heard the name ‘Snicket’ and then opened his trunk to find one and two Baudelaires.

Violet nodded. “You know...you guys are gonna love him,” she replied in a whisper.

Klaus and Sunny looked at one another both knowing what their sister meant. Although both younger siblings had different predictions when it comes to the survivor, they allowed Violet the courtesy of being able to freely share hers.

“If you drive away in secret,” Klaus whispered. “You’ll be a volunteer,”

“So don’t scream,” sunny whispered.

“When we take you…” Violet whispered.

“ The world is quiet here…” the three siblings recited simultaneously as they held on tighter to each other.

It was not the sort of shelter the children had in mind, never in their entire lives, but as they huddled as close together as they could, they guessed it might do. For these three orphans, if indeed they were still orphans, the shelter of Count Olaf’s trunk would have to do, until something better came along.

#misery loves company #violet snicket au #violet snicket #violet baudelaire #klaus baudelaire #sunny baudelaire #dr faustus #count olaf #dr medical school #mattathias #esme squalor #hostile hospital #babs #hal #library of records #snicket file #baudelaire file #survivor of the fire #hiemlich hospital #bertrand baudelaire #beatrice baudelaire #beatrice baudelaire ii #lemony snicket #asoue #asoue au #asoue fanfic #asoue fandom #asoue fanbase #asoue fic #asoue books

[migleefulmoments]

Sometimes I just can’t keep quiet...

Sometimes I just can’t let a comment go. This is one of them. 

From the CC fandom:

Anonymous asked:

Being a Darren fan is like having a constant state of whiplash. You have Team/D & Darren/D and the two have VERY different narratives. You have to “read between” the lines. I honestly take everything he does and says with a grain of salt. EVENTUALLY and HOPEFULLY the truth will come out - pun intended. Unless he plans to be engaged for 7+ years or he takes it to the next level?? This can’t last forever. Thoughts???

Utter and complete whiplash nonnie. It is hard to be a D fan if you pay attention because either he is a walking contradiction or there is a war going on behind the scenes.

Team Shit has tried for years to mold an image of D as a straight bro that is kind of a jerk and very much in love with a woman who acts like a spoiled, rich brat that thinks she is better than every one else and who has painted a public image of someone that does not work and instead prefers to party all the time.  And that reflects on D,  

D wants you to see the fun loving guy who fully embraces all parts of himself and wants to play queer and is not afraid to embrace his feminine side when appropriate.  But also loves sports, is multi-talented but not egotistical. Who treats the people in his path like gold, including his family, friends, colleagues, and fans.  

I agree, this has to end soon. There is no 7 year encage.  They have already pushed the planning to fandom as if it is happening soon.  And every weekend that is not planned is looked to as a possible wedding weekend.  

He either says I do or I don’t really soon. I hope the D he has shown us time and again, the one who has been closeted against his will and rebelled for years, prevails and he wins. Because the alternative is a massive defeat I don’t think he can recover from it.

It is hard to be a D fan if you pay attention because either he is a walking contradiction or there is a war going on behind the scenes. The ONLY reason he is a walking contradiction is because the CC fandom refuses to listen to Darren. They collectively refuse to hear his truth as they obsessively rewrite his story to fit their CrissColfer fantasy. The fandom refuses to accept that Darren is exactly who Darren says he is. They spend their time and energy spinning wild tales about how Darren Criss ISN’T exactly who Darren Criss is. The Darren they are left with, ccDarren is a walking contradiction...he is an amalgamation of their fantasy Darren and anything the real Darren does or says that is “gay enough” for them to accept. Everything Darren does that isn’t gay enough is immediately explained away, erased from his story.  When someone else is writing your story, you will be a walking contradiction. 

“If you are paying attention” is a code for “if you are writing Darren’s story”

Team Shit has tried for years to mold an image of D as a straight bro that is kind of a jerk and very much in love with a woman who acts like a spoiled, rich brat that thinks she is better than every one else and who has painted a public image of someone that does not work and instead prefers to party all the time.  And that reflects on D. Wow..so much to unpack. 

Team shit has tried...to mold Darren” Oh, the projection that is happening in that sentence. Darren is a strong man who is very comfortable in his own skin. Nobody is molding him into anything he isn’t already. It’s shameful that ccDarren is a spineless, gullible wuss without a backbone. The only people desperately trying to “mold him” into something he isn’t is the CC family.

“.. as a straight bro that is kind of a jerk and very much in love with a woman” 

“Straight bro”? Yes, Darren is straight. He has said so for 9 years. Listen to him, it is the least you can do.  EVERYONE HAS THE RIGHT TO DETERMINE THEIR OWN SEXUALITY. He has said for 9 years that he is straight. He has said for 9 years that he is dating Mia. For a year he has said that he is engaged to Mia. He is queer only in the CCers’ own twisted fantasy.

“Kind of a jerk”? well I guess if you desperately want him to be queer and he refuse to play along, then I would imagine you can see him as a jerk. 

“...very much in love with a woman”? He has been consistent with messaging on his love for Mia for many years now. I’m not sure exactly how this is a bad thing, other than it is incongruent with the CCer’s fantasy that two men -who never dated in real life- are secretly in love. The CCers’ inability to distinguish a scripted, TV couple from real life as the heart of the matter.

“...a woman who acts like a spoiled, rich brat that thinks she is better than every one else”  Here we come to the misogyny. Accusing Mia of being a “spoiled, rich brat” who “thinks she is better than every one else” and “who has panted a public image of someone that does not work” and “instead prefers to party all the time” when in fact there is nothing to suggest any of this is true is misogyny. They are nothing more than purely mean-spirited accusations rooted in jealousy and misogyny. We don’t know enough about Mia to know whether she is a “spoiled, rich brat”. What we do know is that Darren says lovely things about her and the impact she has had on his life. We know that both Darren’s friends and her friends say very sweet things about her.  The CCers dismiss them all as being “contractual obligations”as if that is a thing. Nobody is getting their friends to sign contracts to praise their girlfriend or themselves. Mia barley speaks and certainly hasn’t said enough publicly for fans to claim she is anything good or bad. 

“... believes she is better than every one else...” Um...again, Mia speaks very rarely in public, making this statement simply baseless. It is the ugly green monster of jealousy speaking. Using stereotypical derogatory terms to describe a woman simply because it suits your fantasy is the definition of misogyny.   

 “...and who has painted a public image of someone that does not work and instead prefers to party all the time” No, Mia has never “painted an image of someone who does not work”. She has worked most of the time we have known of her and then she opened a bar. Owning a bar is actually a job even if ajw and the CC fandom can’t see it on social media. But ultimately, It doesn’t matter if she has job or not-Darren and Mia’s financial arrangements within their relationship is not anyone else’s business. Mia’s value isn’t based on her career earnings or the status of her job- no matter how may times ajw claims they are. Mia’s job or lack of one has NO reflection on Darren as a human being. As for “preferring to party”? That is literally another completely made up CC trope. 

“She reflects badly on Darren”? The idea that Mia is supposed to worry that she is a negative reflection on Darren is another misogynistic, 1850′s belief-when women were unable to vote and seen as property of their husband. Mia is an independent woman, a person that Darren loves for who she is. If he is worried about how she reflects on him, then he is an asshole. The majority of the world has no idea who Darren loves and only the most diehard fans even see Mia. Darren tells us he loves her and as fans, that is the only thing that matters. 

“D wants you to see the fun loving guy who fully embraces all parts of himself...” Um, sure, Darren wants people to see him for who he is and he is very comfortable in his skin. What part of Darren in the last year was not fun loving? I don’t get who they are seeing.  

“...and wants to play queer and is not afraid to embrace his feminine side when appropriate” No, he isn’t afraid to embrace his feminine side...that doesn’t mean he is gay. He wants to play queer? Darren has never said that playing queer characters is a career goal of his...in fact, he said the opposite because he understands representation. He has played queer characters in his 3 biggest roles and it’s getting redundant. Nobody wants to be typecast. All actors want to stretch themselves and doing new things is part of that. If he was in the closet then he really has no business playing queer characters. Claiming that Darren wants to play queer characters is a literally ajw putting words in Darren’s mouth based on her CC fantasy while dismissing the importance of representation. 

“But also loves sports, is multi-talented but not egotistical. Who treats the people in his path like gold, including his family, friends, colleagues, and fans”. He’s queer, acts like a girl but he loves sports....can she be anymore  stereotypical and reductive? I’m always shocked when they make statements like this; I never think they can stoop lower and they always do.  

“...he’s not egotistical”? Newsflash, Darren has an ego. Putting your fantasy of perfection onto a real flawed human being is silly and immature.  

“Who treats the people in his path like gold, including his family, friends, colleagues, and fans”  Does Darren treat everyone “like gold”? IDK.  How could we know?  We know that he treats fans well and he has a lot of friends. But we don’t know how he treats people in his life. He is literally a stranger to all of us.  Colleagues say nice things about him but it’s all PR, after all? Darren isn’t perfect, he is a real person with real flaws. Proclaiming is perfect is immature.   

If you put together statements from various posts from the last few days, you get a picture of the how the CC Fantasy is far removed from reality. Their fantasy reads but in a stereotypical over-the-top romance novel except they are dealing with real people. 

“is multi-talented but not egotistical. Who treats the people in his path like gold, including his family, friends, colleagues, and fans... the one who has been closeted against his will and rebelled for years, prevails and he wins....He will do what he needs to do for those he loves. And that includes fighting a foe that we will never know the depth of... (cue the lyrics to The Impossible Dream). This song always comes back to haunt me in relationship to D. He lives it, he breathes it, he feels it on a daily bases. Soon he will find he will reach the reachable star....D isn’t straight, that is a fact and he has a male partner.  If you pay attention to the details, it is really clear....To those who know he is  closeted (a fact), he looked like a coward and it made it sound like he had CHOSEN to be closeted and it is the path he will be continuing to chose....While D is far from perfect, he is at war and his team is actively working against him...The hole is deep. D must start to climb out of it. The time is now. The encage must be broken shortly after the SAGs. If not, I honestly fear for him and his ability to come out anytime in the next 10 years and frankly, having observed him for a really long time, I don’t think he would survive a continued alliance with M, who is pure poison to him, or a continued alliance with RR and SS..I hope my gut is right and that the D I have watched for so long prevails and wins this war. But while the final battles are being waged, everything must be viewed from the perspective of a fight going on and realizing D is not in control of things published in his name. But despite that, he chooses to continue to do the things he loves, despite them, including channeling his inner Mar/iah gloriously.

Yeah, so not based in reality at all.

#CC #ccer #ccers #cc fandom #cc blog #cc family #Darren Criss #chris colfer #crisscolfer #it's all a fantasy

[jcmorgenstern]

So far, do you prefer show Sebastian or book Sebastian and why? As compelling as I found book Sebastian, I am LOVING what the show is doing. He seems more humanistic and fleshed out as a character.

Hi anon!! Okay listen first I apologize because this ask is going to be very long and enthusiastic, because this is my favorite topic and I have so. many. thoughts on it.

So obviously, despite his uh, salient and penetrating flaws (both in his character and portrayal), I really am way too fond of book Sebastian. Especially when he is written as a more ambiguous figure (the beginning half of COLS) than an absolute maniac. He’s manipulative and dangerous, and alongside Jace seems to raise the question of “nature vs nurture.” Unfortunately the answer to the “nature vs nurture” debate that his story gives is the biggest problem I have with his portrayal and role in the story–everything is always tied back to his “demon blood,” which he cannot seem to overcome or escape. He is by nature evil, inhuman, subhuman even, at least in Clary’s eyes. If you read the cut scenes from City of Glass from his POV, even he doesn’t think of himself as human or understanding human things, and while it is implied somewhat thinly that this is at least partially due to his upbringing by Valentine, the narrative explicitly ties his failings as a character and a being to his blood. He is by nature evil, and cannot be anything but until the demon blood is burned away by heavenly fire.

The problem with this is that she spends the entire series showing us that “blood doesn’t matter,” both in terms of family ties and sins (the Morgenstern blood) or actual demon blood (the downworld). It borders on a plothole when you have Tessa born of a shadowhunter and a demon, being completely human and having none of Sebastian’s apparent natural evil. More troubling is the implication that nature is more important than nurture–Jace is not different from Sebastian because he was raised by the Lightwoods with compassion and love, but because he has angel blood. I could babble on even more about how Sebastian presents as psychopathic (ie devoid of empathy) and how attributing that to demon blood sort of throws all low-empathy people under the bus and ignores the fact that even someone completely devoid of empathy can be kind and sympathetic, but that would make this post waaaaay too fucking long so yeah.Anyway, my point is here that while I really love book Sebastian, I have a lot of problems with both how he’s written and the implications of how he’s portrayed, and the show changes pretty much everything I dislike. First, while the crispy-shapeshifter reveal initially threw me for the loop of the fucking century (if I hadn’t been in a library at the time I would have fucking screamed, lmao), it actually does fix the Tessa-Sebastian plothole problem and honestly fits even more closely with the facts established in TID. (I’m not here to rag on CC for not being able to somehow divine stuff she’d make up for later books, like that’s sort of stupid, but really just praising the show for creative use/manipulation of canon). We don’t really know….what exactly Sebastian’s “demon powers” include, but the shapeshifting stuff definitely falls in line with canon, and it also makes more sense in a technological world that he’d be able to fool the Clave into thinking he’s the real Sebastian Verlac.But more importantly they completely change the dynamic of his motivations, past, and the shape of his character arc. The show has consistently emphasized Jace’s trauma due to his abuse by Valentine (especially in 2a), and they also allow Sebastian the same thing. In fact, they really take it to ridiculous levels (instead of “beat one boy but not the other” they straight up send him to literal fucking hell), as if to slam your skull into the fact that Valentine Is An Abusive Dad (not that the fandom really…noticed lmao). At the core, show!Sebastian wants Valentine’s love more desperately than Jace ever does, and even his plot to “avenge” himself by sending Valentine to Edom quickly degenerates into demanding/begging for approval and any indication Valentine cares for him at all or regrets his actions. (More on the complexities of Valentine and how the Agony rune made him relive sending Jonathan to Edom as his worst memory at nine). Show Sebastian desperately wants some kind of love or affection, and that’s the most relatable/human motivation I personally can think of. He’s more complex–does he shove a kid off a bridge at age eight because he’s a psychopathic monster, or because he’s been raised to be a soldier with no empathy? (His justification that he wanted to test the theory of gravity is uh….laughably stupid, though. Google it next time, buddy). Even the really bad stuff like killing the real Sebastian, trying to kill Max, kissing his sister is reoriented. He kills the real Sebastian because he escapes captivity and he’ll do anything to get to Valentine (still not great but better than “lol i did it bc i could”), he actually could possibly have not meant to deal Max a killing blow (not sold on this one personally but Max doesn’t even fucking die so that really undercuts whatever emotional impact Max’s death even had to begin with), and the kiss was almost “I have no social skills because I spent like, ten years of my life in hell with demons and I don’t know I should opt for a tasteful hug instead.” Even his deeply disturbing obsession with Clary is reframed as a hope for any sort of love or redemption, which he’s sort of…creepily/naively shoved on her because she defends him to Jace.Also they make him extremely charming and manipulative and honestly Will just. Knocked that shit outta the ball park, also knocked me out of the ball park, I really love show Sebastian, he’s horrible and would probably open a portal to hell in a grocery store. Watching him stay loyal to Valentine while knowing deep down that Valentine is using him is really hard for my dumb ass, okay, and I am so so SO ready for season three and exploring how Lilith gives him what he’s always wanted (a parent who loves him), and what kinds of choices the showrunners have him make from here, he’s so much more complex and human than book Sebastian is and entirely driven by his past rather than some bullshit “demon blood” magically making him evil and anyway I’m ending this now because I don’t even want to know how many words this answer was. Anyhoo thank you so so much for the ask I really really enjoyed answering it, and hope you get something out of the….massive wall of text too??

#sebastian morgenstern #jonathan morgenstern #i should have put this under a readmore #i love a crispy boy

[gulescamisade]

Mega Texas:  Day 8, Old Frenemies

ARADIA: -she's taking a nap, it seems, and it really sounds like she's mumbling something about feferi and terezi-

TYRENA: -She's sitting... nearby. In a manner that would appear like eavesdropping.-

ARADIA: -she is OUT-

DIRK: -since their destination is more or less within city limits, dirk has pulled the car into some abandoned lot where he's trying to get as much information on the oil refinery as possible from his device. he glances back at tyrena and aradia when he hears her mumbling.- ... DIRK: -casually eavesdrops too-

ARADIA: yes...snow...

DIRK: - 👂 ✋-

ARADIA: alaska

DIRK: ... -murmurs at her- (What about Alaska?)

TYRENA: Y0U CAN WAKE HER Y0URSELF 1F Y0U TH1NK SHE'LL TELL Y0U

ARADIA: (dead)

DIRK: ...

DIRK: -gives tyrena a concerned glance. not that it means TOO much... aradia would likely just say (dead) under her breath while conscious, too. but it's unsettling either way.-

TYRENA: -SHE DOES NOT APPRECIATE HIS BODY LANGUAGE AT ALL-

TYRENA: -she's still just listening with the same expression-

ARADIA: i know

DIRK: ... -well, eventually she'll wake up and he can prod her about it then. for now, there are other things to discuss.-

DIRK: I've managed to download a map of the refinery. It's pretty basic google maps shit, but it's better then nothing. I sent it to everyone's devices. Also highlight potential points of entry.

TYRENA: AND 0UR G0AL 1S T0 SAB0TAGE WHATEVER WE CAN MANAGE

TYRENA: 1 PRESUME

ARADIA: -sits up, awake now, yawning-

DIRK: That's the idea.

---

[ANYWAY, some time has passed and it's dark out now, one single street lamp lighting the abandoned lot they're parked in. Dirk has exited the vehicle, calling everyone together so he can properly run them through the very loose plans he's created.]

DIRK: You might have noticed I've forwarded a map of the refinery to all your devices. In case you've been snoozin' since yesterday, in the spirit of the events past and future, both in Flavortown and D.C., we're going to fuck up one of the Empress' sources of income.

DIRK: I've circled a few entry points. -shows off the map via projection from his own device- There's a fence all around the perimeter. I don't know if it's just your standard fence, if it's barbed wire, or electric... But we've got the resources to pass it in whichever case, I'm sure.

DIRK: Our best bets are to either come around the back where most of the tanks are... Or around the front.

DIRK: Perks to the back -- less likely for there to be activity there and we can sabotage their storage right off the bat.

DIRK: There appear to be offices around the front. Might be more useful to fuck up documentation and what have yous.

DIRK: Ideally, we'll be able to fuck up the entire complex. But we gotta start somewhere.

EQUIUS: -He is tired, and he is hangry. Mostly, he's ready.-

DIRK: -eat some doritos friend-

EQUIUS: D --> I would vote for the back. They will not care to protect their logistics when the livelihood has been destroyed

TYRENA: 1 1MAG1NE F1RES W1LL BE HARD TO SUPPRESS 1N TH1S DRY HEAT TYRENA: SURR0UNDED BY V0LAT1LE L1QU1DS

NEPETA: =She has this grass for you Equius..... why won't you EAT IT.=

NEPETA: :33 < since pawffices have more boring paper work we could rig a fire in the front while going through the back! they'll be too busy putting out all the flames and it'd be purriority to not let things blow up here since theyd blow up a lot!

TYRENA: Y0U ARE ADV1S1NG WE SPL1T UP TYRENA: WE NEED A RENDEV0US P01NT

NEPETA: :33 < eifur that pawre we have something ready to set off a sneaky fire then sneak pawround the back

NEPETA: :33 < ...do we have something we can make with that? :00

ARADIA: -looking off a little while everyone is talking-

TYRENA: YES

TYRENA: 0NE 0F MY SPEC1F1CAT10NS

TYRENA: PRESUM1NG THAT D0ES N0T DEFEAT THE PURP0SE

EQUIUS: -Flexes irritably-

DIRK: I always have the means for fashioning small time bombs.

TYRENA: ARE Y0U V0LUNTEER1NG T0 SET 1T, AS WELL?

EQUIUS: -Set it and forget it-

DIRK: -nods- I can definitely do that.

TYRENA: -NODS AT THAT, THEN-

TYRENA: SEEMS S0METH1NG APPR0ACH1NG A PLAN

TYRENA: G01NG T0 HAVE T0 W0RK QU1CK

TYRENA: 1 GUARAUNTEE THEY'RE EXPECT1NG US

TYRENA: THEY D1D BR1NG US HERE, AFTER ALL

NEPETA: =Looks to Aradia also, she's been acting a little weird=

NEPETA: :33 < well have to be supurr secret shadow fightpurrs >:33

ARADIA: -looks back at nepeta and seems to snap out of it- as discreet as possible

EQUIUS: D --> Simple enough

DIRK: -closes the projection and puts his comm away- Cool.

DIRK: We're about a mile from the refinery here. -gestures to it just down the way. all lit up, pumping chemicals out into the atmosphere... beautiful.-

DIRK: Figure we can hoof it or... Equius can work his literal magic on the cars, if that's feasible.

DIRK: Either way, discreet is definitely the name of the game.

DIRK: That's mostly a reminder to myself. Y'all know how flashy I can be. -waves a hand.-

EQUIUS: D --> What are you e%pecting of me, to devise cloaking for the vehicles

ARADIA: can you do that

DIRK: If you can... That'd give us an advantage.

DISCIPLE: -SOMETHING LOUDLY CLICKS. she is holding her large crossbow. It apparently got larger in the day since they made plans to attack this place.-

DISCIPLE: :33

EQUIUS: -Sighs-

EQUIUS: D --> I will see what I can manage -Empties a shit ton of random tech from his sylladex and gets to work-

DIRK: I didn't mean build something. I mean like... DIRK: -spirit fingers-

ARADIA: -does spirit fingers also-

EQUIUS: D --> .....

DIRK: -thank you aradia-

EQUIUS: D --> That's much easier, yes

DIRK: -spirit fingers turn into two thumbs up-

DISCIPLE: Rrrr. She is getting anxious. Is any more we must do?

EQUIUS: -Forgive him. He's tired...and hunger-

NEPETA: =nuzzles on Disciple and purrs=

NEPETA: :33 < that should be it! h33h33h33 mewve b33n purpawring a lot!

DISCIPLE: Yes. MUCH preparation. -She rumble.- DISCIPLE: Is restless. We burn the blood of the earth and she shall have none of it again.

DIRK: -claps hands together- Let's go Wildcats.

DISCIPLE: -YOWLS-

EQUIUS: -Alternatively he could just chuck the cars in-

NEPETA: =Wee=

DIRK: -there are a FEW flaws with that plan......-

DIRK: -GETS IN HIS CAR. void him up stud-

NEPETA: =climbs on the car, void her up steed=

DISCIPLE: -She's going to sit on the roof with her crossbow- >;cc -WARFACE. she pulls on her hood. HER WARFACE IS NOW ALSO A LIONFACE-

NEPETA: 800 ✨ ✨

EQUIUS: -Gets in the other car, here they go. A nice sheen of sweat precipitates on his body as his very existence becomes hazy to...well...everyone. This is much easier than the whole ship. As long as Dirks vehicle stays close to his they are completely undetectable-

ARADIA: -good job. You're doing good-

NEPETA: =VROOM. She's holding onto the hood with her claws feeling the wind, the excitement of the BRAWL-TO-BE=

DIRK: -leads them down the road... but eventually he takes them OFF road, a short distance from the fence near the back entry point. hidden behind some... bushes... they aren't great cover, considering they're all dry and brambly, but so long as they're mostly cloaked by the dark of night, it should be fine until they need to get away. which is why he's parking them OUTSIDE.-

ARADIA: -watching everything as it passes from inside one of the cloaked vehicles-

NEPETA: =Equius do you wanna try nibbling on this bush?=

EQUIUS: -No.-

DIRK: -liar-

EQUIUS: -He could just void teleport and leave y'all here...-

NEPETA: =You didn't want dirt, or grass, or bush, WhaT WILL YOU EAT?=

NEPETA: =She could BITE HIS BUTT=

EQUIUS: -Bring me the blood of the condesce-

NEPETA: =Also while arguing she's scoping the facility=

[It's your pretty basic oil refinery. But it's QUITE LARGE. At some point all the storage tanks were painted pink. Incredible. They can also see the fence is barbed wire.]

DIRK: -gets out of the car and looks towards the others.- Alright. I'm gonna go set up the distraction, you guys work on getting in around the back. I'll meet up with you there. -and he's gone in a flash (step.) he's gotta make this quick.-

TYRENA: -She cracks her neck-

TYRENA: 1S THAT CHA1N L1NK?

NEPETA: =Nods and scampers to the back entrance. Barbed wire, PSH. How high is it?=

ARADIA: -exits the car also and just barely flinches-

[I am chainlink, the fence would helpfully inform Tyrena, if only it could speak. It would also tell them that it's roughly 12 ft high, but those who still have their eyeballs should be able to deduce that.]

NEPETA: :33 < it is and pawbout two and a half mes high!

TYRENA: -She's gonna walk up to it and put her hand on it and TEST IF IT SHOCKS HER-

[IT'S SHOCKING... How anticlimactic this action is. Because she doesn't get shocked.]

EQUIUS: -Hups Nepeta and Disciple over the fence-

NEPETA: =WEE, she does a flip. FOR STYLE=

TYRENA: -She's going to rip a hole with her ROBOT STRENGTH.-

TYRENA: -and pass through. Hrm. Nothing out of the ordinary yet...-

EQUIUS: -I MEAN. OKAY-

DIRK: -with a skip and a flash jump dirk manages to clear the fence near the front. when he finds the closest building, slaps a little bit of plastic explosives right along the side, then zips over towards another small building to use it as cover... then... BOOM. enough to blow a humble hole in the wall and catch some of the interior and shubbery on fire. TACTICAL ESPIONAGE ACTION!! scurry crouches through the shadows towards the others.-

[The others are in the middle of all these pink storage tanks. Round and ready to be drained of their precious life blood.]

NEPETA: =Oh she'll stab ya=

ARADIA: -flies over the fence-

[Now that they've caused a DISTRACTION, they better do as much damage as they can while they can. They can hear shouting from the other side of the facility as workers rush to deal with the fire and investigate it's cause. Other than that, however, there doesn't seem to be too much activity around...]

DIRK: -except DIRK notices something while making the trek over there... the armored cars they saw yesterday are parked over here. zoinks.-

EQUIUS: -PUNCHES A TANK. Goobye-

NEPETA: =She's gonna go around and start jabbing holes in these tanks from the backs, it's not going to be that great for the ground but.... yknow=

ARADIA: -CALM YOUR ASS DOWN-

EQUIUS: -Uproots another tank and tosses it in the direction of the fire, soaking everything in its path in gasoline. What was that Aradia?-

DIRK: -ROLLS to avoid getting squished by a tank. goddamn, hulk. he's not complaining. that'd be an A+ way to go.-

NEPETA: =Look at him go, she sighs.... while slashing things=

[There is something approaching at breakneck speeds-- some kind of BLUE STREAK. A whirling metal orb weathed in energy weaves around the trail of gas from the hurled tank, crackling with some kind of energy as it spins through the air-- suddenly launching directly at Equius, the most obvious source of the damage.]

NEPETA: =What the balling heck=

EQUIUS: -What the tinglefloops?-

ARADIA: get down

EQUIUS: -This is fast, faster than he can dodge. He braces his arms to block.-

[ IT STRIKES INTO HIM like a pinball, or a spinball, or a SONIC SPINBALL FOR THE SEGA GENESI]

[ It slams into the beefy arms with considerable force, dust and wind kicked up as it ricochets up into the air, swiftly uncuring to reveal some manner of... troll? Covered in plates not unlike an armadillo, a pair of glowing eyes fix on the group, scanning them over slowly as it comes to land on top of one of the tanks with surprising grace for someomeone with such sharply limited range of motion.]

[ He leaps into the air, curling at the apex of his leap and beginning to spin, that blue energy wrapping around his body again as his RPMs rise dramatically before even touching the ground. There is a screech and he flies forward, again, head-on directly at Equius, as though testing him.]

NEPETA: =Oh... not a ball. A troll. An old friend. Trolld friend if you will. Seeing them again is reassuring but also. Not at all. Hurt flashes over her face then anger and fear=

NEPETA: :33 < wait!! =Wait what... don't hurt them?? And to who it's to she doesn't really know. She probably should've done more preparing for this instead of pushing it into the back of her vault=

EQUIUS: -okay that is ENOUGH, sir. Equius lets out a low hiss, but this time the rollie trollie is met with a STRONG punch-

[ROLY POLY TROLLY strikes head on with fist, taking no obvious damage from the STRONG punch but flying through the air in almost directly the opposite direction, with almost no inertia.]

EQUIUS: -But is there a sproing sound-

[PROBABLY]

EQUIUS: -Sick-

NEPETA: =She hopes there's a sproing but her hair is also on end and she's just anxiously watching them pshooo into the distance=

NEPETA: :33 < (mmrrnnrngnngnrngrnng) equihiss!-- ughhhhhhh =anxious pacing cat, she's not GOOD AT THIS SHIT=

EQUIUS: D --> What

[ Probably would have kept going, but a large set of whiplike lashes latch onto the troll in air-- still spinning, but held laterally by another figure. Long, mechanical tendrils holding the ball about twenty feet over her head, sticking out of a set of mechanical hands that look to have been useless for any function other than handling these things.]

[ This one stares at them as the air grows colder, somehow, a layer of ice thickly forming over the glowing, spinning sphere.]

DIRK: -ARRIVES. sword: out. he is forcibly ejected from the oil refinery... except not really. not yet.-

DIRK: Now this seems a little excessive. -stupid freak show military task force-

NEPETA: =Remember that one time she opened up then shoveled it away forever? Mmmm regrets on that one=

NEPETA: :33 < FUCK =Scrambles about=

NEPETA: :33 < just, MOVE run! =sHOVES him=

[ U THINK IT'S EXCESSIVE? It is excessive. That glowing ball of troll is being covered in ice-- FEET OF ICE, even, as it's got about a ten foot radius as she slams it on the ground. It has lost no momentum and is already skidding across the ground at them.]

DISCIPLE: -YOWLS as she scurries up one of the tanks.-

EQUIUS: -IS SHOVED-

EQUIUS: D --> Nepeta what is your major malfunction

NEPETA: :33 < =What's YOUR major malfunction= its my =huffs at all this crashing and just pounces, gonna haul Eq if she has to, ears lowered though she's angry= its my old pawry unit

EQUIUS: D --> What? What are they doing here? Why -He's moving he's moving SHEESH NEP-

[They just barely manage to avoid getting trampled by a big sphere of ice, but as it passes them by, it abruptly explodes-- shards flying EVERYWHERE. These two do not appear to be happy to see them. They do not appear to be betraying much of anything with their blank expressions.]

[The armadilo lands to the ground, finally stopped momentarily as the two of them begin approaching from either side of the group.]

NEPETA: :33 < g33! i should ask their puppeted robodies >:'''CC =She's got the claws out and slashing the shards that come their way but also she doesn't want to have to kill them=

EQUIUS: D --> Puppets...We have to find a way to incapacitate them

DIRK: -well, he's a bit out of the loop having arrived late from the other side of the sudden battle field, so he's leaping into action from behind to slice at ms. freeze.-

NEPETA: =Bless her horse=

[Speaking of horses and blessing them a figure looms behind the Equinep pair. A dangerous tail raised then striking down on them]

EQUIUS: -Equius is distracted and thus struck by the fiendish appendage. He goes skidding a ways away-

AZLOYA: -Ms. Whips, or Azloya as Nepeta would know her, lets out an inhuman noise as maroon blood spills from her back. Her skin is a little too rough-- that slice might have bisected an unaugamented troll like her. She flips forward, mechanical tendrils latching onto the ground as she flips upside down, the many arms scuttling like some kind of octopus as a blue sphere goes flying towards Dirk from the far side of the yard.-

NEPETA: =DOOF, THERE THEY GO. Nepeta goes skidding too= [The figure doesn't let up however. It pounces right for Equius. It's a Nep....borg. Complete with scorpion tail and perma wolverine claws]

EQUIUS: -Pushing himself up, he takes in this figure, but more importantly his rail was hurt. Old unit or not, Equius lets out a loud hiss before charging and unleashing a flurry of blows-

DIRK: -her scuttling is a little distracting -- but even MORE distracting is ANOTHER NEPETA?? he doesn't notice the sphere until it's almost making impact. shIT, he turns his sword up in hopes he might shield himself/slice the ice.-

NEPETA: =She's not so sure how to feel about seeing herself, what she would've been... Looking at Dirk he might need help so she glances back just trying to fight and concentrate. Taking out some darts from her old work, good for paralysis. SHOOTS them at Azloya=

BORGPETA: =Is very agile and bendy, it even has Nepeta's same fighting style, liquid catting around the blows then jumping back to strike Equius with her tail again=

[NO ICE THIS TIME. Just a big ball of blue energy. It might still do some pretty serious damage--]

TYRENA: -but it's a good thing that dirk isn't actually fighting these borgs alone. A kick from the side-- sharp and rather delicately timed-- sends the troll skidding to the left of running into his blade by inches.- AZLOYA: -The figure turns as something hits her-- still scuttling on her fingertips, it would seem, as the needle sinks into her skin. She's bleeding and a bit battered, but it's not slowing her hands or those limbs down, yet. Raising each finger and slamming it down, trying to cut right through Nepeta.-

TYRENA: 1 HEARD WHAT SHE SA1D

TYRENA: WHAT THEY ARE

TYRENA: WE MAY N0T HAVE THE K1ND OF T1ME T0 BE G00D PE0PLE R1GHT N0W -she eyes dirk and eyes the blue ball-- Liekit-- as it smashes into the building behind them.-

NEPETA: =Oh that's bad news. She tries to jump and dodge the tendrils. Please do not. You still owe her 5 bucks and this isn't how you get out a debt=

NEPETA: :33 < im not leaving them like this! =hisses at Tyrena. She will fight you too=

AZLOYA: -Her body is slightly limp, but the fingers are still going. Slice. Slice. Slice. Each time she does, a bit more frost builds on the ground, growing strange and slippery and so very not texas.-

EQUIUS: -Oh gdi. It's like sparring with Nep except for the unbridled rage he feels. He attempts to grab the tail, planning to slam the robo into a tanker-

NEPETA: =Azzy stop she's trying to prove a point about saving you guys. Parts of her jacket are getting the slice as she rolls and starts to dash for the octo-pa=

BORGPETA: =Equius gets his hand on the tail but at the expense of being stuck lower in the arm by the hollow tip. Poison, it's poisonous=

AZLOYA: -She's got the high ground, and MANY lims with which to do the slicing. But as Nepeta starts to run, she does another flip-- launching herself down at her, legs first, attempting to plant her boots on her chest.-

DIRK: -he just about bit it there... thank you, tyrena. he glances between everyone, frowning- Seems like they don't give a shit about the property damage either. -stays on the defensive for whenever sanic comes back around.-

[As if things weren't chaotic enough, someone in the distance is taking aim, right at the big horse after he's been stabbed by a poisonous tail... And shooting a net in the hopes of capturing him within it's crackling electric webbing.]

DISCIPLE: -!! -Yowls suddenly! THE HORSE-

NEPETA: =UGHHHH, she looks at Equius getting shanked in the arm and DOOF takes heavy boots right in the chest, but grabs and jabs more of Spiny's venom into this leg=

EQUIUS: -Hisses out in pain but tosses this imposter nep Mario 64'style. So long gay bowser! Then heckerdoodle! He's netted and hissing angrily at the electricity coursing through his body. FREE HIM-

BORGPETA: =Goes sailing into a bomb, only just into the distance=

AZLOYA: -GrGH. This should be easy now... she drunkenly swings the tendrils at her, trying to rake it against her, but her body isn't obeying its orders... staggering and increasingly weak.-

DISCIPLE: -She's jumping down pulling a bone knife and trying to cut the electrified net. It probably hURTS TO TRY THAT THOUGH. This isn't a great plan.-

[oh hey, speaking of, Liekit steps out. Not rolling this time... slow and deliberate footsteps as they approach Dirk this time. Many, many spines extend from their body with a sickly, lurhcing sound, along with the crackle of psionic energy.]

????: -the shooter steps onto the scene, reloading his weapon as he approaches disciple. he's a rather weathered and stern looking seadweller- I wouldn't do th^t if I were you. DIRK: -he bristles -- not at the troll approaching him with such measured steps so much as the voice he hears behind him. a voice he recognizes, and had hoped he'd never hear again. the Militant.-

DIRK: -it's disarming, but he squares up against liekit.- We got this. -assures tyrena before flash stepping over to flank liekit and divide his attention. but avoids the spines, of course.- You're too slow.

DISCIPLE: -growls as she drops the knife, pulling her crossbow again.-

EQUIUS: -Hissing and trying to free himself-

NEPETA: =FRIEND SHANK shANK SHANK SHAnk. She is also getting the first good look of Azloya she's had in... a long time and it makes her want to whimper but ALSO THERE'S SOME SALTY GRANDPA NETTING HER RAIL=

DISCIPLE: She has no words for this. For him.

NEPETA: =SALTY GRANDPA=

LIEKIT: -He bristles-- LITERALLY-- at Dirk. The divide of attention seems to work, though the sharp, electrified spines launch from his back in a spray of needles at him—

TYRENA: --as she swings a kick at his soft underbelly.- AZLOYA: -She looks... worse for wear. In so many ways. There isn't even a glimmer of recognition as she begins to stumble, tendrils still lashing violently at anything and everything that they can reach-- which is so very much.-

AZLOYA: -As the poison takes over she simply slumps over, fallen, the limbs still squirming and thrashing.-

NEPETA: =DEFINITELY GOT THE BUSINESS END OF SOME OF THOSE LASHES, can she capta Azloya's body? If so into the dex it goes and Neps gonna try to shoot darts at the SALTY GRANDPA NEXT......=

BORGPETA: =Bitch you thought, POUNCES=

[Commense cat scuffle]

EQUIUS: -Pure adrenaline is the only thing keeping Equius from outright succumbing to the poison.-

DISCIPLE: -She flinches as the duplicate jumps on Nepeta, eyes trained on the sudden scuffle, as she turns on the stranger again.- If you are responsible for this, there will be no mercy. None. -Despite the fact that the gun is trained on her, she still attempts to fire a bolt at him.-

DIRK: -manages to deflect some of those needles, but he takes a few more hits jerkily. SHOCKING. he shakes it off as best he can.-

MILITANT: -DRAW. he takes a shot at the at the same time, aiming carefully enough so her arrow will at least get thrown off by the net, even if he doesn't manage to capture the cat. he can only do so much at once, however, and finds himself stuck with poison darts. for the moment, it seems like only a minor inconvenience to him. SCOFF.-

[Meanwhile, the net is strong, but maybe not strong enough for MUTANT AMOUNTS OF STRENGTH. ]

DISCIPLE: -SHE FALLS TO THE GROUND, convulsing under the net.-

NEPETA: =GET BIPPED GRANDPA=

NEPETA: =Wait no!=

TYRENA: -She pulls her sword out-- for a second, before throwing it aside-

TYRENA: AUUUUGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

TYRENA: HE W0N'T D1E

TYRENA: G0

TYRENA: HELP W1TH THAT 1NSTEAD

EQUIUS: -He can break these cuffs! And so he does, dragging himself up to his feet a bit woozy but nevertheless charging at the militant, whipping the remains of this net AT HIS FACE-

LIEKIT: -wheezes temporarily, but launches even more spines at Tyrena. She twitches, but all the electricity hardly seems to bother her.-

TYRENA: -she swings both fists down at the METAL PLATED HEAD.-

ARADIA: -lands from...wherever the hell she's been, knowing it's now her time to interfere. Her whip's out though, AND SHE ATTEMPTS to CRACK IT ON LIEKIT-

LIEKIT: -STAGGERS AND FLINCHES at both the strike and the whip-crack, beginning to whirr and kick up sand-- hurling at Tyrena and attempting to RICOCHET towards Aradia.-

TYRENA: -DOOF-

NEPETA: =Pins this.... weird..... version of herself=

BORGPETA: =Goes to stab with the tail, CATCH THIS BUSINESS END=

NEPETA: =Oh no, not the business end! She rolls and catches the entire end of the business right through her arm but also enough to let the bot stab itself. Haha.... ehhhhh this is weird=

DIRK: -BACK INTO THE FRAY I belatedly write after he's given the OK from tyrena to leave. adrenaline pushes him forward, but there's memories haunting his thoughts as he approaches the militant.-

MILITANT: -turns to face the charging blue blood, now drawing a cutlass from his specibus to hack back at the net. he doesn't seem phased much by that either.-

MILITANT: It's funny we should cross p^ths here. -tilts head to look at dirk who he KNOWS is rushing at him.-

DIRK: -oH OK. HE HESITATES.-

ARADIA: -she saw this coming, so she attempts to fly up as soon as likeit ricochets to her in order to dodge-

EQUIUS: -NO HESITATION! CATCH THESE HANDS OLD TIMER. ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA!-

LIEKIT: -AS HE WHIRLS INTO THE AIR even more spines spray out, using that momentum to really try and launch them at the two of them.-

ARADIA: -DOOF. She's not invincible, and at least one of the spines pierces her leg. Oops. Still gonna WHIP-

MILITANT: -bobs and weaves, turning the rifle in his hand to swing the blunt end at equius' head. he's spry for an old man but the strength behind the strike is definitely characteristic of a seadweller.-

????: -ANOTHER CHALLENGER APPROACHES. a blue blood in a clean military uniform aims her own crossbow at nepeta. ER... WAIT. WHICH IS WHICH?? clearly she isn't the most competant fighter here...FIRES WILLY NILLY-- but at the wrong nepeta. whoops.-

DUOCATBALL: =Someone gets pierced by an arrow and the whoel ball slumps over=

LIEKIT: -it feels kinda like getting tazed, but at least the lash knocks him groundward.-

TYRENA: -INTO HER. But that seems to have been her plan, as his back-- and all the crackling psionic energy-spikes-- collide into her skin.-

TYRENA: -She may or may not be bleeding, it's hard to tell with all of the sparking and flashing. She is, however, getting him in a chokehold, of sorts, with the only leverage she can manage around the big ball. Go to sleep.-

NEPETA: =She got to look herself in the eyes and watch as the arrow lodged in Borgpeta's throat bled her out with twitchy convulsions= 8))

????: { = Oh, SHOOT! = } -curses in the distance. she did a bad...-

ARADIA: -jolts and loses her balance, wings not being much assistance here until the tase feeling wears off, where she attempts to SUPPORT TYRENA should ball escape-

NEPETA: =Shoot is RIGHT. Something to focus on, someone to focus on she. Growls then roars at the arrow firer, she's bleeding and poisoned and also just fueled on regret, trauma, and confusion. Hello, feast upon her foot=

TYRENA: -he doesn't SEEM to be. He keeps trying to spin, or flail, or launch more needles, but it doesn't exactly work-- the tazing sensation in Aradia's leg gives way, and it's not bleeding TOO badly, but she's effectively got him wrangled.- TYRENA: -But it's... strange. She's just taking all of the energy. Her more obviously cybernetic components glow a faint blue.-

????: { = !!!! = } -YELPS as she gets a boot to the face. it hurts, and she hits the ground, but what she lacks in form she makes up in toughness, so she starts to roll away almost immediately after absorbing all that shock-

EQUIUS: -Gets a gun butt TO THE FACE-Equius reels, spitting out a bit of blood as his glasses fall off his face in shards. He's going back in for more cqc!-

ARADIA: -WHATS A LITTLE BLOOD AM I RIGHT? she's watching tyrena, still on support-

NEPETA: =HISS, she's gonna leap on this troll and BITE IT=

MILITANT: -he's going to get a gut full of blade if he comes much closer—

DIRK: -until he unfreezes himself long enough to grab the militant's arm and wrench it behind his back before he can stab at equius.-

MILITANT: -drops the cutlass, his cool expression cracking. he takes another swing behind him to try to get dirk in the face while also twisting his arm out of the human's hold.-

DIRK: -HE DUCKS, but this whole manuever has them breaking apart and distancing each other. he skids to a stop next to equius.- I know he's all decrepit and shit but he's tougher than he looks.

MILITANT: -picks up his short sword again, circling around the other two men and waiting for their next move.- I wish I could s^y the s^me of you. H^ve you gone soft, Dirk?

EQUIUS: -Yes-

DIRK: -NO! ... yes-

ROXY: =SOMEWHERE FAR AWAY. he's always at halfmast, she got ur back bby=

DIRK: -he's so thankful he has such supportive people in his life now-

????: -OH RIGHT SHE'S HERE TOO. nepeta will have to CATCH HER FIRST as she scuttles on all fours before she hops onto her feet and sprints to hide behind a tank.-

NEPETA: =Scampers up the tank to get the DROP on her=

TYRENA: -She throws the troll down, and lifts her head towards Aradia, directly.- TYRENA: N0T K1LL1NG TH1S 0NE

TYRENA: Y0U MAKE SURE 0F 1T

TYRENA: -She seems to just... wander off, in fact, as she grabs her blades again.-

ARADIA: -she nods. UNDERSTOOD-

????: -WAH!!! splat. she's squished under cat.- { = Wait, don't hurt me! = }

EQUIUS: D --> Understood -Shakes his head. FOCUS Equius.-

[ In the not-too-distant distance, one of the pipelines just straight up explodes, even more smoke rising into the sky.]

EQUIUS: D --> Dirk, attack him from above -Because he's about to do something cool. Instead of attacking him head on, Equius STRONG PUNCHES the ground cracking the concrete and causing a localized tremor around the militant-

NEPETA: :33 < =DOES IT ANYWAY, but she's still poisoned and her arm is shaky and numb so she just rests the claws against the troll's throat= mew had no troupawl shooting at me, why shouldn't i? =bares teeth boohiss=

MILITANT: -uh oh, he wasn't quite expecting THAT... he needs to get his sea legs back, because the tremor definitely has him losing his balance.-

DIRK: -blips above him, ready to bear down on the militant with an aerial slice.-

MILITANT: -reacts to that only just quickly enough, blocking the strike with his own blade, but it doesn't stop dirk from colliding into him. he lands on his back, still on the defensive.-

DIRK: -it's a power struggle alright -- the militant has more strength then him, but he manages to keep pressing his blade down on the other... until it slips.-

MILITANT: -HA-- he cuts at dirk, leaving a nasty gash across his cheek.-

DIRK: -NOT HIS FACE. fucking... slaps the cutlass out of his hand and just starts WAILING on the militant instead. this is incredibly personal.-

????: { = T-That-- .... Is a good point... = } -wheezes, looking around for some kind of way out of this. then she sees dirk beating the shit out of her friend/boss.-

????: { = W...! Wait... You're from the UU? Is that... Dirk Strider? = }

EQUIUS: -The poison is overriding his adrenaline. Has his body always been this numb? Probably. Hoo...wow okay but...He's gotta help dick...Dirk. Yeah.-

NEPETA: :33 < =Bares teeth= purrhaps. whats it to mew?

DISCIPLE: -SHE'S FINALLY OUT OF THIS HERE NET PROBABLY-

ARADIA: -with an eye on likeit, she quickly flies to equius to check up on him-

DIRK: -he'd react to explosions too if he wasn't too busy remembering this guy kidnapping him as a child, putting him through hell, etc etc... HE JUST WONT STOP PUNCHING. there's purple everywhere.-

NEPETA: =FREE DISCIPLE 2K???=

DISCIPLE: -YES-

EQUIUS: -Yes, feel the anger...drink it.-

????: { = I know him! My name is Lucana Leiqin-- I've been looking for him-- Just ask him?? = }

DIRK: -VIOLENCE BREEDS VIOLENCE BUT IN THE END IT HAS TO BE THIS WAAAAY-

ARADIA: dirk

EQUIUS: -Do it. Kill him.-

EQUIUS: D --> Break...His neck. Let us be on our way -His breathing is becoming labored.-

ARADIA: equius

ARADIA: -her voice raises- dirk

ARADIA: think about your options

DISCIPLE: -Works herself under one of Equius arms, catcrawling at him and looking for that poison stab wound...-

DISCIPLE: -and then she tries to suck on it. IT'S PROBABLY TOO LATE.-

DISCIPLE: -BUT U KNOW HOW IT IS-

EQUIUS: D --> Disciple, your efforts...are appreciated, however I'm sure the poison has worked its way into my system thoroughly -Wheeze-

DISCIPLE: >:CC -2 BAD THIS IS DISTRESSING HER TOO MUCH-

DISCIPLE: -ptoos out some blood-

DIRK: -don't distract him aradia, geez. he does start slowing down though when he hears his name.-

MILITANT: -he's beaten to a pulp, but still here... still conscious enough to talk shit.- Yes-- Think ^bout... your options.

MILITANT: You were m^de for this... Killing me will only prove it.

MILITANT: So why don't you? You've ^ldre^dy... done the Empire ^ ^ f^vor... By te^ring ^p^rt this useless refinery...

DIRK: -pauses, just kind of staring at him-

NEPETA: =Looks Dirkward then huffs and HAULS UP "Lucana"=

NEPETA: :33 < fine, if purr in his fafur then shoot the salty troll grandpa

ARADIA: -REMEMBER...WHO YOU ARE...DIRK...-

LUCANA: -HOIST- { = I-- I can't do that... =} -she's watching this scene, DEEPLY TROUBLED, however-

TYRENA: -She walks towards the rest of the group, singed and burned and covered in holes, none of which appear to be bleeding all that much. The fires are probably going to keep going for a while yet, as she approaches the group.-

NEPETA: :33 < he s33ms k33n on killing who you came here fur and given purr options you have no choice :33

EQUIUS: -Leaning on this cat. He's really tired....-

DISCIPLE: -:xx-

DISCIPLE: -she's not quite sure what to DO about that... or how bad the poison is. purrs anxiously.-

MILITANT: -grabs at dirk's throat. he's still got enough strength in him to break his squishy fragile human neck. DO IT, DIRK. KILL HIM BEFORE HE KILLS HIM.-

DIRK: -chokes, hesitating still...-

LUCANA: -SHE CAN'T KILL HIM!! she's loyal to the empire, even if she wants to save dirk... but cipher is kind of a dick... but... killing him might get her in trouble—

DIRK: -but it doesn't matter, as he slams his fist into the militant's face one last time with the last bit of strength he can muster. the grip on his throat loosens.-

NEPETA: =growls at this and HAULS her over before the poison gets to her too, she can feel it in the numbness of her arm=

NEPETA: :33 < she claims to know dirk and have b33n looking fur him.... in the not bad way i pawssume =EYEBALLS LADY=

ARADIA: -unsurprised-

EQUIUS: -Wheezing horse, the new mgs villain-

LUCANA: -sweats... ok, so her intentions aren't entirely pure-

DIRK: -looks over at them a little wild eyed and breathing heavily. there's so much blood hello.- ... Lucana?

LUCANA: { = It's me...! = } -oh dirk... she looks at him sympathetically, then around at the others. time to make a decision.-

LUCANA: { = They were going to blow up this facility... And all the other major refinery pipelines across the country. The Empress has little use for it as it is... She wants to flood the crater it would have left behind if you hadn't interfered. = }

LUCANA: { = And I think that's just a little too much! Even for her! Why kill all these people when-- = } -shakes her head. there's not time for rambling.-

LUCANA: { = ... You should get out of here before they send back up. = }

TYRENA: AND D0 WE REALLY TRUST Y0U?

LUCANA: { = What difference does it make? I'm on my own here! You can leave me be and I'll look the other way... Or you can kill me-- Either way, you've got a running start! = } -frowns and glances in the direction of the abandoned convoys...-

ARADIA: -looks toward the others. their choice. their decision.-

NEPETA: :33 < mew say that like its so easy if we just leave mew here without doing anything then efurrything is still going to blow up >:((

NEPETA: :33 < i cant say i trust mew or that we shouldnt kill mew but its pawvious SOMETHING is going on here

TYRENA: HA HA TYRENA: HA HA HA

TYRENA: SHE'S R1GHT, Y0U KN0W

TYRENA: D0 N0T GET ME WR0NG, 1 COULD K1LL Y0U

TYRENA: BUT WE'RE G01NG T0 NEED S0METH1NG BETTER THAN

TYRENA: A RUNN1NG START

TYRENA: -she scoops up a little bit of teal blood from the many holes in her body-- it doesn't look like she has a lot of blood, and she's hardly bleeding at all-- holding the finger towards the girl.-

TYRENA: THEY D0N'T JUST MAKE M0NSTERS 0F SAD L1TTLE MISFIT L0WBL00DS

TYRENA: AND WE NEED T0 GET T0 M1NNES0TA

NEPETA: =Narrows eyes more at that=

LUCANA: -sweats.... but minnesota is... dammit!- { = Fine! Take me with you. I can get you clearance at an airport near here... And you can take a jet to Minnesota! = }

LUCANA: { = But that's... That's really all I'm capable of offering!! = }

ARADIA: -her wings flutter-

TYRENA: G00D

TYRENA: -She sniffs the air, turning her head back towards Dirk.-

TYRENA: D0 Y0U 1NTEND T0 LEAVE THE B0DY HERE

DIRK: ... -finally gets to his feet, shakily. he isn't all here right now. his voice is low when he speaks.-

DIRK: No. -hoists. he's going to drag the militant over to the nearest fire and chuck him into it. now they can leave.-

NEPETA: =....she could've eaten that..=

DIRK: -fried fish-

NEPETA: = :'( =

TYRENA: Y0U ARE MADE F0R N0TH1NG, HUMAN, EXCEPT AN UNCERTA1N EX1STENCE

TYRENA: 1 H0PE Y0U C0NT1NUE T0 REMEMBER THAT -Shes gonna start walking. Sensitive nose like hers, she's got no desire to stay along the flames.-

ARADIA: -watches the flames for a moment. walks closer to the flames on her own. just watching.-

DIRK: -nods slowly as he watches flames consume the last of this awful representative of ideals that ALSO need to die in fire. at least they're working on it. maybe he can finally let go of his ties to it.-

DIRK: -glances at aradia after a moment.- ...

LUCANA: -fidgets, then straightens up her posture and begins to lead them over to one of the convoys. they can all fit in one of these luckily.-

ARADIA: -she's still staring-

NEPETA: =good yes, also she couldn't haul around spiny's venom without having things for poison so she's going to hand that off to someone so she and equiheck can get unpoisoned... she's also thinking about the bodies of her old friends hanging out in her dex. Mmmmnnnggg, what to do with them. She has them at least but... what to do. She's very tired=

DIRK: -pries himself away to follow the group. time to go.-

LUCANA: -she will drive this thing... maybe at gun point if it'll make people feel better.-

ARADIA: -waits a few seconds more before turning around and bringing up the rear-

ARADIA: -her leg is still bleeding but whatever-

[AND THEY'RE DRIVING. They should arrive at the airport sometime tomorrow.]

#artifactualAnnihilation #sybillineAutonomy #technetronicTactician #caballineTrottage #arseniccaudal #apostolicChronicler