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meadowlarkx · 4 months

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End of Year Fic Recs! 🔮

Tagged by @swanmaids! I like this format a lot, thank you 💕 There were so many amazing Silm fics this year that it's nearly impossible to pick out just a few, but I did my best.

Recommend up to 5 series or multi-chapter fics from 2023 that everyone should read (multi-year WIPs count, if the last update was in 2023).

Recommend up to 5 single chapter fics/one-shots (long or short) from 2023 that everyone should read.

Recommend up to 5 fics NOT from 2023 that everyone should read (oldies but goodies).

Recommend up to 5 of your own fics (completed or WIP) from 2023 that everyone should read.

Multi-chapter fics

Strange Currencies by @jouissants (in-progress, Maedhros/Maglor accidental LaCE marriage, M) - this fic is one of my absolute favorite things to come out of 2023, lavishly and heartbreakingly imagined post-canon reembodied/returned Exiles and brilliant maemags falling together in late Beleriand. invest now!!!

here we go again by @i-am-a-lonely-visitor (completed, Orodreth/Celebrimbor & Gil-galad Mamma Mia AU, T) - the most summer fun ever with one of my favorite Celebrimbors, delights me to think about and I think about it often!!

Such a Marriage by DifferentSong (in-progress, fem!Maedhros/Maglor set between Doriath and Sirion, M) - I feel personally blessed by the ability to list multiple maemags longfics on this list. This one is so tender, with incredible characterization for both these two and Tolkien Elves (old & young, sad & gay) in general; leader fem!Maedhros owns my heart.

What the Water Gave Me by @imakemywings (completed, Finduilas/Nienor canon divergence AU, M) - beautifully described and cozily, realistically lived-in development of a relationship between these two in a universe where Nienor survives her suicidal leap; this bandaged the wounds left by CoH for me!

In Twain by @jouissants (completed, gothic and gendery Maedhros/Elrond and Maedhros/Maglor, E) - cinematic reading experience and deliciously winding tale of Elrond's coming to better know Maedhros, Maglor, and himself; so many lines from this--and the ending--just grip me and won't let me go.

Single-chapter fics

Wondrously Wrought by @searchingforserendipity25 (Maedhros & Maglor in a universe where Noldor craft their children's personalities, G) - this beautifully written fic has me in a chokehold months & months later, I simply love it so much--the Fate of it all and the dynamic between them, and how thick the tension and emotion hangs even in these few moments.

and some of us returned by @i-am-a-lonely-visitor (Maedhros/Maglor, past Maglor/Glaurung assault at the fall of Maglor's Gap, M) - fulfilled my wildest dreams of Glaurung angst played straight, eerie and gorgeously written psychological horror told through Maedhros' eyes and his own possessive love for Maglor.

As You Wish by @imakemywings (Maglor/Thranduil battle couple devotion and hurt/comfort, T) - so many great single-chapters this year but this one is SO dear to me; I love eerie attack dog Maglor who simultaneously cares overmuch and I think this ship is so thematically chef's kiss as an alternate ending for him; wry Thranduil is fantastic here too.

one of your girls by @swanmaids (Celegorm/Oromë, Celegorm & Maglor; femininity and internalized homophobia in Valinor, E) - masterful weird mythical Ainur devotional customs surrounding Oromë and his hunt, and a really touching exploration of Celegorm's character in a time when he still has yet to choose his fate. Celegorm's tension with Maglor is great here too.

Played by @disastrousexpense (Maedhros/Maglor, Maedhros/Fingon where Maglor seduces Maedhros through the guise of "teaching" him for Fingon's benefit, E) - one of my favorite Maglors this year, so theatrical and affected and alluring and (in this Valinor period) quite selfish, yet expressive and deeply, deeply feeling. a rollicking story that made me laugh and then made me cry!

Oldies but goodies

Elvish Letters by @ladygavroche (Caranthir & Finrod, Celebrimbor & Fëanor, Maedhros & brothers, epistolary humor, in progress, G) - this is a favorite of mine, along with the Caranthir fic earlier in the same series. Incredible and hilarious epistolary that just sings!!

The Silver Queen by @i-am-a-lonely-visitor (AU where Gil-Galad is Celebrían, trans!Celebrían/Elrond, completed, M) - such a lovingly written fic for a brilliant concept. Multiple scenes of Celebrían's arc in this had me weeping earlier this year.

The High King of the Noldor and His Faithful Hound by shatteredGlasses (Hrunting_License) (Celegorm/Maglor, assault and tensions during Maglor's kingship, completed, E) - During Maedhros' captivity, Celegorm thinks the worst of Maglor, and Maglor uses Celegorm for self-harm. Genuinely disturbing, excellent angst, and very formative for me!

Through the Smoke I See You by Dragonstorm (Maedhros & Maglor, Maglor's Gap and Dagor Bragollach, single-chapter, T) - one of my favorite explorations of Maglor's devotion and guilt towards Maedhros, and the immense risk of trying to hold the Gap! I love it so.

Thistle Whistling on the Wind-Blown Field by happythoughhuman, Torpi (Finrod & Edrahil, Finrod & Avari, culture, environment, storytelling, completed, M) - I've been meaning to revisit this strange gem of a TRSB fic for a while. One of the most vivid explorations of Melkor's impact on the environment in Middle-earth, of serious Elven cultural differences and the notion of Finrod as a kinslayer (while a very Finrod-loving story; he shines in this, making connections as is his wont). Also, won my heart for putting mangroves in Valinor.

My own fics

bite thy wings and let thee crawl (Melkor/Maglor, noncon macro/micro horror porn inspired by this art by @aquaregiaart and Lay of Leithian, E) - the Big Melkor fic, set during Maedhros' captivity. In my head this is my best work of 2023 and probably ever. Come closer... give him a click.... he can't hurt you....

Less Wise (sapphic Maglor/Thranduil, canon divergence, E) - pining with a happy ending in an AU where kinslayer fem!Maglor has come to serve Mirkwood's king fem!Thranduil. This was my attempt to write the sort of comforting and cathartic fic I so enjoy reading.

elvenkings (here on tumblr as well) (moments ft. Orodreth, Thranduil, Elwing, Elrond, G) - my drabbles fic for Sindar Week 2023 about the long-lasting echoes of Menegroth and Iathrim heritage. I'm really happy this brief story resonated!

pursuit (Tulkas/Nessa and Oromë/Nessa, genderfluid Nessa, M) - Nessa and Tulkas wed. Smut and mythical vibes ft. confident and changing Nessa, the dancer and the god of prey. I love that weird Ainur shit.

yes many and beautiful things (Maedhros/Maglor during the War of Wrath, M, now with art by @aquaregiaart!) - After their final argument about stealing the Silmarils, Maedhros and Maglor share themselves with each other wholeheartedly one last time before the end; sort of a "what if they loved each other and that was worse."

#2023 year in review #my posts #tagged in #tag meme #sticking to silm for this one #thanks for the chance to reflect on this year's stories!!#i think nearly everyone on tumblr has done this already but if i tagged you or you see this and want to do it pls feel free to & @ me!#i did not read many multichapters this year but those i did read were fire

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cheershalo · 3 years

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By request, here are some of my favorite angsty fics in order longest to shortest. Some of these are angstier than others but I wanted to give a good range!

*note: make sure to read the tags because some of these deal with heavier topics! take care of yourself!

*also: most of these are b!L because that’s what i like to read! smut or no-smut is marked as well as the basic tags!

Remember to leave kudos and comment on all these lovely fics if you decide to read!!

💔 pray for some sweet simplicity by @eeveelou | E | 237k | abo | b!L - (motorcycles, racer louis, journalist harry, slow burn, a classic)

An AU where motorcycle racing is the biggest sport in a heavily divided world, Louis is trying to take control of his own destiny, and Harry is in for more than he bargained for.

💔 Collision by @tequiladimples | E | 225k | b!L - (mythology/fantasy, fairy louis, dark harry, enemies to lovers, slow burn, love love love)

Mythology/Fairytale!AU in which Louis is a dainty fairy with a temper who wants to be intimidating and Harry hurts people. Naturally, they hate each other.

💔 And I Wait for Paradise by You_Just_Mightx3 | NR | 209k | abo | b!L - (addiction, ptsd, pining, best friends to lovers, eventual mpreg, so heartbreaking and heart-wrenchingly beautiful)

The one where it’s not the Harry who touched Louis’ heart that comes home, but an addict thought to be hopeless. A paradise above addiction when Louis wins so does Harry.

💔 Don’t Let It (Me) Break by @falsegoodnight | E | 169k | b!L - (exes to lovers, slow burn, grief, panic attacks, healing/therapy, sad louis, def read tags, a fav of all time)

The one where Harry is oblivious, Louis is broken, Zayn and Liam are in love, Gemma and Lottie are lovely, and Niall is just waiting for everyone to get their shit together.

Oh, and it's all Malcolm's fault.

💔 Saving Symphony Hall by @helloamhere | E | 125k | abo | b!L - (touch depri, businessman louis, hurt/comfort, a fav)

“I think I have an idea,” Louis said. Slowly, and reluctantly, but with a growing sense of the inevitable. “God damnit, I think I have a really good idea.”

“Oh christ, that's the problem-solving face,” Babs said. “Last time we saw that face, he sold a company.”

“Wait, what?” Zayn asked.

“Right place, right time,” Louis said. “Also, fuck my life,”

“What?” Zayn repeated. Niall patted his hand.

“I usually just roll with whatever Louis is about to do,” he said. “It’s better for us all.”

“That’s the attitude,” said Louis, “I’ll tell you tomorrow. Tonight, I need to do some research. Zayn, give me your number. I’m gonna save our symphony.”

💔 The Dead of July by whimsicule | M | 117k | b!L - (avengers au, captain america harry, louis as bucky, ptsd, so fucking good)

Harry is Captain America, and Louis’ been dead for 70 years.

💔 Untangle Me by suicxne | E | 103k | np smut - (canon compliant, friends to lovers, first kiss, cute <3)

The one where Harry and Louis finally get it right.

💔 nothing worsens, nothing grows by @soldouthaz | E | 103k | b!L - (roadtrip au, college au, enemies to lovers, friends with benefits, ot5, a fav of all time)

Another roadtrip AU featuring Harry as the misunderstood hipster, Louis as the bitter psych major, Liam as the one with the secret boyfriend, and Niall as the one who just wants everyone to be happy.

💔 Here in the Afterglow by @harrybridgers | NR | 89k | b!L - (high school au, historical, 70s au, small town, slow burn, strangers to friends to lovers, soft soft soft)

1970’s AU. In a tiny town in Idaho, Louis’ life is changed forever by the arrival of a curious stranger.

💔 And down the long and silent street by whimsicule | M | 86k | b!L - (historical au, regency au, poverty, wealth difference, hurt/comfort, a masterpiece <3)

Wherein Louis and Harry are on the opposite ends of the social ladder, but their paths still cross on the filthy streets Louis calls his home. The odds are staked against them from the beginning, and even more when Louis' past finally catches up with him.

💔 Consequences by @allwaswell16 | E | 79k | b!L - (amnesia au, exes to lovers, hurt/comfort, secrets, amazing amazing)

Two years ago Harry let his powerful family come between him and the love of his life, something he deeply regrets. Louis has tried to move on from their devastating break up. Sometimes, he even thinks he has. It only takes one moment to freeze them back in time.

💔 We’ll Cast Some Light (You’ll Be Alright) by @harrybridgers | NR | 74k | b!L - (enemies to lovers, sort of exes to lovers, demons, demon hunters, INCREDIBLE)

There’s a standard procedure for this. Scan, track, kill. But with a solar eclipse and a Greater Demon with unfinished business looming, the path to keeping England safe from harm becomes complicated and shadowed by mystery and secrets. For Harry and his team, times have never been harder, especially when a few old friends turned foes show up. Harry is left with just over forty days to overcome the hurdle of tension between them and reconcile their past, and figure out just what Louis is hiding from him before it’s too late.

💔 Latibule by @quelquesetoiles | E | 54k | b!L - (spirited away au - ish, mythology, fantasy, god harry, human louis, sad louis, jealousy, amazing)

A Spirited Away AU of sorts where Louis just wants to heal and be left alone, only for all his plans to be destroyed by the hands of an infuriating British God.

💔 7 Up by @cherrystreet | E | 52k | b!L - (friends to lovers, growing up together, will make you cry like a baby, a classic)

Very loosely based on the British TV show "The Up Series" and somewhat inspired by the song “Something I Need” by Onerepublic, we follow the lives of Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson in an interview setting every seven years. They fall apart and come together, their lives and emotions recorded. Harry calls it a time capsule. Louis calls it a pain in the arse.

💔 Strangers in Love by @darlou | E | 42k | b!L - (amnesia au, car accidents, light d/s, growing up together, enemies to lovers, a fav)

Louis wakes up to find himself in a marriage with the last man he thought he'd ever end up with.

💔 Ever Fixed by @eeveelou | E | 42k | b!L - (strangers to lovers, divorce, depression, child death, the plot twist GOT ME SO GOOD - i read this yesterday with ris and h o l y s h i t)

Three years ago, Harry was happily married, successfully heading the largest technology company in the world, and raising his young daughter. After he loses nearly everything in the aftermath of his daughter’s lost battle with a rare brain tumor, it may take three strange and yet very familiar visitors – and a man from the therapy group Harry keeps refusing to go to – to get him back on track.

💔 before we knew by @falsegoodnight | E | 40k | b!L - (soulmate au, lawyer harry, editor louis, stubborn harry, pining louis, literally one of the best fics ever written)

Louis has been skeptical of soulmates for years so it seems like fate when he finally bumps into the owner of the obnoxiously large signature printed into his skin since age sixteen: Harry Styles, a human rights attorney who is firmly against soulmates.

💔 where the lights are beautiful by twoshipsdrifting | M | 31k | abo | b!L - (THE accidental bonding fic, mentions of mpreg, have reread many times and it still hurts so good)

Harry wasn’t wrong about that, not in a general sense. Lots of omegas did seek out rich alphas and betas, hoping or planning to go into heat at the right time. Plenty of omegas saw this as their duty, especially if their families weren’t well off. Worse, Louis couldn’t honestly say he’d never thought about it.

If that had been his life, his goal, Louis would feel pretty good about himself now.

As it is…Louis feels like shit.

💔 autumn leaves by @suspendrs | NR | 28k | b!L - (war au, soldier harry, waiter louis, french louis, friends to lovers, so so good)

Harry is an American soldier in France during World War II, and Louis is a French waiter that doesn't mean to fall in love with him.

💔 Cherry by littlebluetui | M | 25k | b!L - (exes to lovers, famous harry, non-famous louis, comfort sex, light d/s, really good & really underrated!)

Harry and Louis were soulmates, no one doubted that.

Sometimes one soulmates leaves the other to go on a world tour though.

Sometimes not having them at all is better than only a little.

💔 like a bastard on the burning sea by vashtaneradas | NR | 22k | implied b!L - (cheating/infidelity - i don’t read cheating fics as a principle but this one just... hurts so good, haven’t reread and i don’t think i ever will but i think about it often)

Harry breaks Louis, Louis breaks everything.

💔 all this delusion in our heads by buttfucklarry | E | 15k | b!L - (exes to lovers, sad louis, sad harry, mentions of mpreg, another underrated beaut <3)

After Harry and Louis break up, they cope with it in very different ways. What will happen when Harry keeps calling his ex over when things go wrong in his life, but Louis just can't take it anymore?

💔 a grocery list pinned in blue by dangerbears | NR | 20k | b!L - (exes to lovers, divorce, a masterpiece truly)

After eight years, Louis finally has everything he's wanted. Except for Harry.

💔 Cupid’s Chokehold by bluelemur | E | 35k | b!L - (soulmate au, cupid louis, human harry, virgin louis, feel good but also a bit angsty)

Louis is a Cupid who tries to match up Niall and Harry. It doesn't work out as planned.

💔 Love is like this; not a heartbeat, but a moan by @loveletterharry | E | 13k | abo | b!L - (enemies to lovers, ex-childhood best friends, pining harry, beach house, lovely)

In which Harry loves Louis, but Louis has been cold to him ever since he presented as an omega at age fifteen.

Eight years later, Louis approaches Harry with a request, and who is Harry to deny him?

Remember again to leave kudos and comment on all these lovely masterpieces! And feel free to let me know if I made any errors!

Request another category here.

#my fic rec lists #angst recs #categories #jem's favs

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trillian-anders · 4 years

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chambers - xii

pairing: bucky barnes x reader

warnings: violence, angst, slow burn

word count: 3488

description: post-endgame. Steve Rogers has passed away from old age. The one remarkable thing is that no one knew his heart would be in the condition it was. He was able to save one more life. After receiving his heart, strange things start happening. Including something that would change your life forever. (Inspired by the Netflix series of the same name.)

There was silence.

For one beat,

Then another.

His hand was dropped, “What do you mean you know?” You stood from the couch, anger welling up in your chest.

“Listen, Y/N…”

“No.” You shake your head, taking a step back as he stands. “You knew he planned on giving me his heart?” Emotions were high, boiling over into hot tears on your cheeks.

Steve planned on giving you his heart. Why? Why you? How did he know he was going to give it to you? A year before he did. How could he have timed that? His heart failed at the same time yours did. A perfect fucking coincidence.

Bucky looked desperate, not knowing what to say, “He—he knew he was dying.” Bucky said, “At the end.” His voice was right and eyes were growing red, tears in the corners. “He said shit, like he knew the day he was going to die…” Bucky ran his fingers through his short hair, tugging at the ends. “Like how the fuck did he know when he was going to die Y/N?”

Both of you are crying now, a strange energy in the air as Bucky continues, “He told me he read about you in the newspaper. He said that if he could give you his heart he would. He had some deal with Strange.” Doctor Strange. Bucky shrugged. “I don’t know. I just know that he wanted you to have it.” You choked on a sob, stepping back trying to avoid Bucky’s grip on your arm. His warm hand closing around your forearm.

“I don’t deserve it.” You hiccup. “You know I didn’t deserve it.” You were nothing. You’d done nothing. You were nobody. Bucky’s grip tightened, pulling you into his chest and wrapping his other arm around you.

“But you do,” He mumbles into your hair, “You—“

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Asked into his chest. “Why didn’t anyone tell me?” Bucky’s fingers traced your shoulder, up your neck to cup your cheek, bringing your face to look up at his.

“If I said it was to keep you safe, would you believe me?” Your lips parted to answer, eyes searching his own for the truth. The alarm blares, hands going to cover your sensitive ears as Sam’s voice comes over the speaker.

“Code Grey.”

His face falls. Bucky steps back from you, jaw clenching. “Stay here.” Your eyes widen, barely hearing him over the blaring alarm and Sam’s voice barreling off instructions over the speakers.

“What does ‘Code Grey’ mean?” You yell, following him down the hall to his room where he pulls the black trunk out of his closet. Inside is his tac gear, gun holster, cache of knives and the guns that fit perfectly in the holsters.

��Peter is going to stay with you.” Bucky said, the alarm muffled in the room but still loud. “There’s been an attack. That’s what Code Black means.” Pants quickly changed, undershirt tucked with shirt, vest, and jacket pulled over, his left arm out all the way to the shoulder. Holster clipped across his chest as he strapped himself with guns and knives.

Your heart was racing, anxiety rising. The emotional toll of this day would hit you later but for now, adrenaline was going. He looked at you after placing his last backup magazine on his belt. “Everything will be okay.” His hands grasped your arms, pressing a kiss to your cheek he sped past you to the stairs, “Stay with Peter!” Yelled behind him and he was gone.

About 330,000 people on average walk through Times Square every day. There was no telling how many had been in the area when the bomb went off.

Between the early evening sky and the smoke, fires still raging it was hard to tell. It was all hands on deck.

Triage was set up blocks outside of the disaster area, the local hospitals already at capacity. NYPD and NYFD has every officer, fighter fighter, and volunteer working to clear the scene. Put out the fires. Sam circled buildings, rescuing people trapped on top. Bucky was lifting debris and pulling out bodies, dead or alive he couldn’t tell. Not with all the soot. Wanda was trying to push back the smoke, smother the fires. Get a bit more visual on the area. Clint and Scott were helping the NYPD search for survivors.

And you and Peter were watching it all on TV. Agents helping get people to medical care. Helping get the bodies that needed to be identified out.

It was on every channel.

Every News station.

The devastation. Peter was crying, you were crying. Families were calling local precincts. Tourists on vacation, their loved ones calling from all over the world hoping to get any information. Are they alive or dead?

“I need to take a minute,” You pushed off of the couch, standing in the living room. Peter nodded from his spot still seated.

“I’ll be here.” His voice tense. He’d gotten off the phone with his Aunt just a minute before. Checking in. Making sure she’s okay.

Your fingers hovered over your lock screen. A text you’d just answered to your Mom, everything is fine. I’m upstate. I’m okay. You sunk down onto the floor of your bedroom. Sitting in the silence. The news muffled by the hall, the door in between. For a minute you can pretend like you didn’t just cause the death and destruction that you could feel in your bones was your fault. Zemo had to be behind this. You never answered him. You never gave him attention. You didn’t do anything.

You listened to Bucky and Sam. You listened to Bruce and Wanda.

They didn’t want you to do anything. They wanted to figure it all out themselves. They wanted-- they were professionals after all. They were Avengers.

He was here. Steve. You could feel him in the corners of your mind. The corners of this room. His presence seeping into your pores. His being sat mirrored to your own, on the opposite side of the room. Knees bent, arms resting over them. Staring.

Your phone rang.

“Did you get my message?” Your heart began to race. Steve’s face turned into a steady glare, jaw clenching. “You never called me back, I thought you just forgot about me.” His voice was steady, unwavering. It sent a chill down your spine.

“Why are you doing this?” Your hands were shaking. “What’s the plan here?” Steve seemed to appear in front of you, close. Almost touching.

“The Avengers ruined my life,” A simple, used explanation, “They took everything from me, even when I tore them apart they still found a way to fuse themselves back together. Just without a few key missing pieces.”

“So what?” Steve was giving you confidence. You could feel it. A ballsy tone coming to your voice as his hands lay over your knees. Comforting. “You wanna try again? Try to tear them apart?”

“No sweet girl,” His voice sinister. The steady accented drawl, the calmness of it, in the light of what he’d just done it made your stomach turn. Steve’s hand lay over yours. A hollow warmth. “I’m going to tear everything apart.”

Glass breaking. The darkness in the compound as the lights turned off. Steve was gone, like a match extinguished. Peter calls your name. A hand grips your arm, the leather of their glove burning your skin as you twist from their reach. Instinct. Steve helping unseen.

You back into another body, their hands grabbing your upper arms. The pull, you throw your back into their chest, head knocking into their nose as you gain leverage to kick your feet up and out, connecting with the assailant across from you. His body fell heavily against the ground. The assailant behind you loosened his grip, the heat of his blood dripping down the back of your head. You spin to connect a fist to his ribs, an uppercut and he was laid out as well. An arm wrapped around your neck, vicing you in a chokehold. Your windpipe crushed, fingers reaching behind you searching for eyes. A bite to your fingers and you push as hard as you can against the ground, causing your assailant to lean backwards, shifting off balance. Feet kicked up to gain momentum as you toss him over your shoulders.

Coughing, trying to take in air.

“Y/N!” Peter screams, the sound of a web shooting through the dark. His gentle hand gripped yours. “Let’s go.” Your throat burned, still coughing. Eyes watering. “Here.” A mask. Slipped over your head, you didn’t even notice the gas. Thick smoke of it throughout the building. The eyes shifted, EDITH coming online.

“What’s the plan?” There were bodies, unconscious, webbed to walls. You could see through the lenses. A similar mask on Peter’s face. Stark tech. It filtered the gas, keeping you from inhaling the abrasive air. He drug you against the wall, pressing your bodies out of sight for the thugs who began to walk through. Their faces now covered with gas masks and strange looking goggles.

“I would advise an escape through the loading bay.” EDITH’s voice came over the comms of the mask.

“Stay with me, it looks like we are gonna have to fight our way out of here.” A reassuring squeeze. You could do this. You could do this.

Bucky’s training, Steve seemed to be helping because it was life or death. Right?

“You can’t rely on that.” Bucky told you. “Use your training first.” You felt inexperienced. Your hands shaking as the thugs grew closer to your hiding spot.

“I’ll try to take a few out very quickly, but you might have to get your hands dirty here.” Peter rolled his shoulders back, hands coming out in front of him to prepare for the group about to come around the corner.

It happened quickly.

You could hardly appreciate Peter’s skill. The ease in which he went about the room. The strength he had, an appreciation for how much he had grown bloomed in the back of your mind, an echo of Steve’s thoughts. But you didn’t have a lot of time to think about it.

Bucky’s training took over. The way you twisted the gun out of their hand. An elbow to the throat. A roundhouse kick to their head. Sliding between someone’s legs, to get on them from behind, wrapping your thighs around their throat and spinning them to the ground. Knocking them out with the butt of their own gun.

The two of you worked your way down to the loading bay. “I never learned.” Peter said suddenly, “Shit, I’ve never learned how to fly one of these things.” Your breath in pants as the two of you loaded into the jet. You looked back at his panicked expression, the lenses to his suit raised and wide.

“I’ve got memory.” You breathed, settling down in the pilot seat. “Sorta.” You could vaguely pull the order in which you needed to flip these switches to take off. Peter sat heavily in the seat next to you.

“I don’t know if I should be scared or not.” Peter joked. Your fingers moved deftly. The ramp behind you closing, bullets ricocheting off the side. Switches flipped, lights going on and the jet moving out onto the runway.

“I need you to have faith in me, because I’m so fucking nervous right now.” The mask pulled off of your face, eyes adjusting to the monitor in front of you. The dim glow of lights along the runway.

“Oh my god.” Peter’s hands rushed to buckle himself in, “Please don’t kill us.” You let out a shaky breath as the engine clicked on, the jet speeding down the runway, before lifting into the air, and disappearing into the night sky.

Bucky coughed, clearing some smoke and soot from his lungs. He couldn’t wait to shower. The thick layer of grime on his body, the sweat, the blood from where he scraped his arm on a piece of rebar. Emotions were high. There were people crying everywhere. The bodies he’d pulled… a lot weren’t alive when he pulled them out.

His fists clenched at his sides. The next time he saw Zemo face to face would be the last time anyone saw him alive.

“Here.” Sam tossed him a bottle of water. His suit was smudged, the white a dark brown from the dust. The shield on his back marred with it. The mask that had been on his face hung around his neck. Lines were the dirt and dust hadn’t reached. Sam’s face was stoic. “We need to advance. This can’t happen again.” Bucky nods, the water soothing on his throat, he coughed once more after he finished the bottle, crunching the cardboard between his hands.

“After this,” Sam took a swig from his own water bottle, “We make moves.” A beep, an alarm. Sam and Bucky pulled their phones from their pockets.

Compound Security Breach

Their eyes met, “Y/N.” Bucky breathed. His heart dropped from his chest. Hand shaking, his phone gripped tight in his hand, the glass shattered.

You were panting, legs pumping as you and Peter ran into the safe house, the creaky hinges of the doors parting to EDITH’s request.

The doors hissed shut behind you, lights coming online in the small cabin in the middle of the woods. Peter’s footfalls stuttered, taking in the dusty surroundings. The cabin hadn’t been used since the funeral.

Not since Pepper moved back into the city.

The walls were vacant of pictures, just the bones of the house and the furniture remained. “Pete.” Your adrenaline was wearing off, emotions had been high all day, the escape left you blinking slowly. Exhaustion was creeping in. “Hey, it’s okay.” His fists were clenched, still sore about it.

“I know.” He turned to you, “Why don’t you go get some rest, I’ll notify the others.” You were too tired to protest. Your mind drifted to Bucky. You hoped he was okay. He always took things like this too hard.

There was a city in Italy that had been run through, a lot of civilian casualties. From Steve’s memory you could recall the small doll he’d found. Burned, next to the body of a little girl. They’d buried her with the doll, but Steve remembers him staring at it. Becca had one just like it.

They’d lay wrapped together that night, Bucky crying into his shoulder. Silent sobs racking his body. It left a sour taste in your mouth. Your legs felt like lead as you walked up the stairs, phone buzzing in your pocket. Heart leaping thinking it was Bucky. Eric’s name flashed across the screen.

Where are you?

You rolled your eyes, too tired to put in the effort. The first room you’d found you fell on your stomach fully clothed, and was immediately asleep.

“Do you believe in fate, Captain Rogers?” The lake was still. Tony’s funeral. It just ended. People were still milling about. Pepper, with the help of Peter and his Aunt May, was serving food inside. But Steve couldn’t eat. It wouldn’t sit right.

He should have died.

He should have sacrificed himself to save everyone. Tony had a wife, he had a little girl. He shouldn’t have died.

The guilt that sat in Steve’s chest was heavy. Heavier than anything he’d ever felt. Bucky was back, so was Sam. They seemed to be a little closer than before. He’d failed a friend before. This guilt was similar to that when Bucky fell from the train.

Back almost eighty years ago now.

Almost eighty years of Bucky being tortured and used, only to come back and have to fight, before dying again.

What was the point?

The emptiness Steve felt. The hollow of his chest.

And Natasha.

She gave her life so Clint could live. Sacrificed herself for the greater good of humanity. But the orphans, the ones she helped for five years before they changed it all back, she never got to see them reunite with their families. She deserved to.

That’s why Steve stood now, hands in his pockets, staring blankly out at the lake. Bucky had tried to talk to him a little before, hand on his shoulder, a reassuring squeeze. But he’d gone with Sam inside, Bucky’s own guilt fueling him to help Pepper set the table, occupy Morgan when Pepper needed to step into the bathroom to cry.

Bucky was trying.

So why couldn’t Steve move?

“Fate?” He asked, eyes shifting over to the man who stepped beside him.

“That everything happened exactly how it was supposed to.” That’s what Tony said. In the message he recorded, everything will happen just as it’s supposed to.

“I’m not so sure about that Strange.” His jaw hurt, the clenched grinding teeth unforgiving. “Things could have worked out differently… better for everyone.” The sorcerer nods, eyes shimmering with knowledge.

“Not for everyone,” He said, “We all have our destiny, roles we play in the grand scheme that lead the story on.” His hands stuffed in his pockets, mimicking the super soldier. “Universes upon universes of stories, Tony’s may have ended in this universe, but someone else’s story has begun in a different universe.” Steve’s brow scrunched in thought.

“What are you saying?” Strange gave him a look,

“Tony was always meant to die to defeat Thanos.” Strange stated simply, “In every universe that Thanos attacks he’s died during the fight in some way, whether it’s to save everyone or simply as a casualty. There was nothing you could have done to stop it. If you’d sacrificed yourself instead he would have died during the fight.” Steve turned to him, crossing his arms over his chest.

“You knew this whole time that Tony was going to die?” Strange turned to face him as well, nodding. “Why keep that to yourself?”

“Because if I said what was going to happen there’s a chance that it won’t happen.” An easy explanation. Steve blinks, taking a breath and trying to understand.

“So why are you telling me this?” Steve shrugs, eyes watery. “Why are you explaining different universes to me?”

“It’s a multiverse.” Strange states. “And we live in it now that we’ve cracked the code on quantum travel. But we also have always lived in it because quantum travel had been found. If time travel ever exists then it has always existed.” Steve shakes his head, a dry chuckle.

“What are you saying, Strange?” Their blue eyes met, a beat of silence, then another.

“What came first, the chicken or the egg?” An old question. One that had a few meanings. If you believed in evolution then it would technically be the egg. If you believed in God then it would be the chicken. But there’s no telling. No true answer. One unanswered, “Do you take the stones back and stay with Peggy because I tell you to or do you go on your own volition and tell me to have this conversation with you when you resurface 80 years in your future?”

Fists unclenched, jaw loosened and dropped, Steve felt confused. “I go back to be with Peggy?” His eyes drifted from Strange’s to the house. The cabin in the woods where Tony had been raising his family. Bucky had tied his hair up in a bun. He was on the porch with Morgan. Her tiny fingers handing him an equally tiny teacup. “I don’t stay here?” His heart racing. Strange lays a hand on his arm.

“That’s up to you,” Strange’s hand tightens for a moment before he goes on, “But there is something you need to know.” Steve’s eyes met his again, the fat tears he hadn’t been able to shed before now running down his cheeks. “There’s a reason to go back.”

Your head was pounding, mouth sour with sleep. Eyes crusted shut from crying once you’d hit the pillow. Your body was sore, but not uncomfortably so. You stretch your limbs out across the stiff sheets, trying to shake the sleep from your body. The sun just beginning to peek over the horizon, a blue glow in the room. You could hear the movements of someone downstairs.

Peter.

You swing your legs over the side of the bed, the cold wood off the floor chilling the soles of your feet. You make your way down the steps, the neglected wood creaking against your footfalls. Turning the corner you don’t see any sign of Peter. A red cape hovered to the right of the doorway, a man in robes stood in front of a sizzling pan. A carton of eggs lay open beside him.

“Doctor Strange?” Your voice is thick and raspy, dry with sleep. The man across from you nods, turning from the stove to look at you, eyes soft.

“We need to talk.”

taglist // @nutellakirb @witch-of-letters @torntaltos @emotionallysalty @an-lover @lbuck121 @rainbowkisses31 @artisticrogers1972 @flightlessbirdiee @bookish-shristi @saturnki @jennmurawski13 @geeksareunique @the-soulofdevil @tinmunky @gifsbysimplysonia @alwaysbenhardysgirl

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #sam wilson #peter parker #tfatws #the falcon and the winter soldier #captain america #steve rogers

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theworstbob · 7 years

Text

yellin’ at songs, week thirty-four

in this post WITH A TWIST YOU’LL NEVER SEE COMING, we review the songs which debuted on the billboard chart the weeks of 8.30.1997, 9.1.2007, and 9.2.2017

8.30.1997

40) "All Cired Out," by Allure ft./112

Imagine how dope this would have been a capella. Like, you have a girl group and a boy group. That's at least six singers good enough to sustain their own groups. Why you gotta give this song all the production? Why not let the cavalcade of singers carry this one home? Curse that we're a good 15 years away from Pentatonix making a capella commercially viable! This song could have been something.

46) "Backyard Boogie," by Mack 10

/clears throat /tugs at collar Eh, now this mack should not have returned. /bows to thunderous applause /leaves the stage /audience still applauding /walks back onto stage /tugs at throat /clears collar Eh, now... /audience falls into rapturous, expectant silence This mack? /everyone in the audience is waiting for the words i speak to deliver their salvation /i hold them for a thousand years Should not have returned. /i am anointed Wonderful Comedy Boy /god himself weeps

62) "What About Us," by Total ft./Missy Elliott

Never gonna complain about Missy in YAS, except for the time she cropped up in 2017 and I wasn't into it. I complained about it then, if memory serves. But I only complained about it because it was a Missy song that didn't sound like this, because this song is smooth and fresh and several other outdated descriptors! Also, I haven't made enough a big deal about The Double Decade Dance Club, but, as far as I'm willing to go back through the archives, the folks who've had songs chart in '97, '07, and '17 are Missy Elliott, Jay-Z, Tim McGraw, and Faith Hill. Special consideration is given to Mariah Carey, who doesn't qualify for Decade Dance with no songs charting in '07 but DID have songs debut later in '97 and earlier in '17! Congratulations to those five people on this fake accolade in a blog read by an indeterminate but likely single-digit number!

68) "Around the World," by Daft Punk

Have I had my complaints about electronic music in the 1997 list? Yes. Have I wished for dance music that sounds like something I could dance to? Several times! Does this mean I like Daft Punk? I... I mean, y'all knew I wasn't cool. Like, this sounds fine, I don't disagree with every single thing happening in this song, which is a step up from all the other electronic music, but I connect to this about as much as I do a well-composed track in a video game. I admire how it does its thing, but I'm not attached to this song in any meaningful way, I'm not having any sort of emotional reaction to it. It just sort of exists while I'm hitting buttons. Wait and this is HOW MANY minutes long? Y'all, I'm behind on every single obligation, no thank you.

69) "My Love Is the Shhh!" by Somethin' for the People ft./Trina & Tamara

This is like a staler version of the Missy track we had earlier, and I already opted not to pay attention to the Missy track so I could blather about YAS mythology, I don't know how I'm supposed to come to this song and find something else to say about it. What kind of name is Somethin' for the People, anyway? How do you settle on that as a name? Did literally every other combination of words in the English language fail to please you? I have to access the Iowa Land Records website sometimes, and the captchas they use on that website are delightful words that are almost English but not quite. Today I had to enter Simbang Carrer. I don't understand how you could be given a set of letters and rules which can create Simbang Carrer and think, "No. Somethin' for the People. That is how we identify." I hope they had a rivalry with Nice Songs For Enjoyment.

72) "Don't Say," by Jon B

milquetoast (adj) - a word used by people looking for a synonym for 'bored' that happened to open the thesaurus while they were hungry

73) "As We Lay," by Daha

"I'll be fine," Bob said as he decided to put off writing the entirety of YAS to Wednesday evening. "I know 1997 has 11 songs, but there's no way all of them are going to be '90s R&B! I won't get burnt out by the fifth R&B jam because there will only be five, with enough variety between R&B jams to keep these songs fresh1" Friends, I can admit when I have erred. In my defense: have you listened to Bad Cop/Bad Cop's Warriors? I feel I should be forgiven for making Bad Cop/Bad Cop's Warriors the only thing I've listened to the last five days. This song is pretty okay. I think the beat isn't quite sure what song it belongs to, but it gives this song a unique sound, which, hey, you probably didn't listen to all these songs. You probably don't get how much I treasure something that sounds unique, even if it's a not especially great kind of unique.

78) "Happy with You," by Samantha Cole

HELL YEAH I LOVE THAT SEINFELD-ASS BASS. You know what, song of the year, right here. I feel like this song is the reward for sloughing through Slow R&B Mire, and now I have this upbeat song about the joy of finding another soul in this world and being in that moment with them, and I just, thank you, thank you everyone for creating this moment, for giving me just like a nice song about how good an emotion love is. Yeah, girl, you try to hit that high note! A for effort! A for good song! A+ to your bassist, what a pleasant song!

80) "No Tengo Dinero," by Los Umbrellos

"Los Umbrellos was a Latin pop dance group formed in Denmark" Um "It was led by the rapper Al Agami, the exiled crown prince of the small African enclave of Africa" UMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM DID SOMEONE SEE THAT NO ONE HAD WRITTEN AN ARTICLE ABOUT THIS PARTICULAR GROUP AND JUST SAID "I'LL TAKE TO WIKIPEDIA!" AND JUST MADE SHIT UP? DANISH LATIN POP GROUP "The song hit #1 in Austria" OK, that I'll believe, knowing what I know about Austrian music that absolutely tracks, this is the trash they love in Austria. But no seriously DANISH. LATIN. POP. GROUP.

86) "Piece of My Heart," by Shaggy ft./Marsha

Oh hell yeah. This is everything the "I Shot the Sherrif" cover wasn't. Like, that was a song that wasn't quite sure what it wanted to do with the song, but you know what this does? You know what made me laugh in my apartment? It took the Janis Joplin cover, it gave it the reggae backing, it did the "COME ON! COME ON! COME ON! COME ON!" thing, and that led RIGHT INTO A GODDAMNED SHAGGY VERSE. LIKE HELL YEAH. That's the music version of the hidden blocks in Kaizo Mario. Just get dunked on. "COME ON, COME ON, COME ON, COME ON," and then it turns out we were building up to Shaggy. That was beautiful. Like, this kinda garbages up a standard, but I don't care, it's hella fun.

88) "I Care 'Bout You," by Milestone

Yep. Yeah, there's about only one way 1997 could end. "Sometimes I feel so alone/I call your heart but there's no one at home." Oh absoLUTEly fuck off.

9.1.2007

38) "You Are the Music in Me," Zac Efron & Vanessa Hudgens 60) "Gotta Go My Own Way," Zac Efron & Vanessa Hudgens 66) "Bet on It," Zac Efron 74) "I Don't Dance," Corbin Bleu & Lucas Grabeel 90) "Everyday," Zac Efron & Vanessa Hudgens 92) "All for One," High School Musical 2

Even in 2007, I was already too old, as well as a tad bit too straight, to have any opinion on the High School Musical series. But! While I have gotten approximately 10 years older in the intervening ten years, I like to think I've become substantially gayer, so HERE WE GO. Honestly, HSM as a franchise is inoffensive fun. I enjoyed the first movie when I was of an appropriate age to have watched it, I enjoyed the clips from the second film as a 28-year-old alone in an apartment, and "Bet on It" is a classic piece of American filmmaking that should be taught in schools. I’m not afraid to say it: High School Musical is great, and we are going to be so grateful if the world lasts long enough for the ‘00s nostalgia wave to hit and create the 20-year High School Musical reunion and/or reboot movies.

46) "Clothes Off!" Gym Class Heroes ft./Patrick Stump

So this song is breezy fun, almost certainly the song of the week were it not for the fact "Bet on It" belongs in every museum, but it does sort of foretell the disappointing direction in which Travis McCoy would venture, dunnit? "Cupid's Chokehold" is this equally fun song about a neurotic, emokiddy person finding love in this crazy world, and it's not the most sophisticated thing in the world, but it's a nice song with a distinct feel, and then there's this party jam about gettin' naked, and it's like, alright, I dig this party jam, but you're gonna go back to, y'know, the emo stuff, right? But they never did. They made one really dope song and then just made this forever.

98) "So Small," Carrie Underwood

Finally: an inspirational ballad from a female country singer. Don't think I've heard one of those yet from 2007. Great times.

9.2.2017

42) "Silence," by Marshmello ft./Khalid

This is a sensitive EDM jam like all the other sensitive EDM jams. I'm still lukewarm on Khalid as a whole, like I think he does a fine job on this song but I don't understand why he's this whole thing, don't really get what he brought to this song that no one else could, but honestly that doesn't matter when I probably couldn't discern this from a Chainsmokers joint. Y'all have fun with this one, teens. Y'all do you.

88) "More Girls Like You," by Kip Moore

Hold up. Hold up. Can we talk about the amazing mixed similie in the first verse? "I've been livin' like a wild old Mustang out in Montana fields" A mustang is a horse. He is comparing himself to a wild horse. Understandable, and hey -- interesting spin on the usual back road cliche! Montana is the state equivalent of a back road. Quality shitty songwriting! "Mighta earned me a bad reputation, but never stopped these wheels" A mustang is a car. So he's a Ford Mustang in Montana? I mean I guess? Always good to compare yourself to an American-made automobile in country music. "I'm like a Camry runnin' with a full tank!" said no country star ever. "From rollin' and goin' too far/From runnin' and gunnin' too hard" OK, so he's a car, I recognize these as car terms, you gun engines, I get that, I remember the word rollin' playing a starring role in the Chamillionaire standard "Ridin'," I guess I got that part wrong at the start. Definitely a car. "So unreigned, so untamed" WHAT A HECKIN' TWIST HE WAS HORSE THIS WHOLE TIME?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!? Man, this song is trash.

92) "Something New," by Wiz Khalifa ft./Ty Dolla $ign

"Girl, you look just like something out a magazine/You smell great, know your body clean" ...Di, um, excuse me, but did Wiz Khalifa just compare his girl to the perfume samples that sometimes come in magazines? Anyway, this song sure existed for three minutes.

95) "Untouchable," by YoungBoy Never Broke Again

Various other videos call this man NBA YoungBoy, and with respect to the choices he has made, I am going to refer to him as that from here on out, assuming we hear from him again, which, hey, he's not the worst of the mumble-rap cohort! I kinda feel bad calling him mumble-rap, because this song actually goes more than one place, and that's at least him mumbling! No auto-tune over a trap beat, an actual human being mumbling over a fairly compelling track. Beat's really good, this might be the first song that actually held my attention for all three minutes. Don't know who produced this, but I hope that person goes just a bit farther than NBA YoungBoy.

97) "I Could Use a Love Song," by Maren Morris

I really wish the first six seconds of "Sugar" could be a single. The rest of the song is good, too, but those first six seconds are goddamned flames. I think it's important for you to know that Maren Morris is way more compelling than this song. It's fine, but like we had "Every Little Thing" two weeks ago, y'know? Like, the music video talks through the song, and I don't... blame it? It's OK! Just slight.

98) "Fix a Drink," by Chris Janson

OH FUCK THIS DUDE AND HIS "ROCKABYE"-ASS SPOKEN WORD NONSENSE. This is stupid. This is stupid, and I'm stupid for ever complaining about the preponderance of '90s R&B I've foisted upon myself. It has a sense of humor decidedly sub-Toby Keith. Congratulations on being able to make beer.

100) "Woke Up Like This," by Playboy Carti ft./Lil Uzi Vert

Billboard didn't classify any songs as either debuts or re-entries, songs that weren't on the chart last week simply didn't have an arrow next to the name and I had to guess if they were actually new or retreads of previously released songs. Like, I could have sworn I had to deal with Kip Moore, but that's prolly just 'cuz it sounds like the rest of bro country's nonsense. So I can't tell if this is a new song because they restyled the title or if this is an actual new version of "Woke Up Like This," but I'ma just go ahead and assume my initial assessment of this dude being boring still holds. I can’t believe an entity called NBA YoungBoy won the 2017 Song of the Week title. I can’t... I... Oh. Hold up.

Who won the week?

Did High School Musical 2 just win this one for 2007. Did 2007 really produce the best songs because this was the week High School Musical 2 dropped. It’s not 2017 because the highest grade I’m willing to give “Untouchable” is C+. It’s not 1997 because there was “Happy with You” and a lot of interchangeable nothings. Holy cats. 2007 won High School Musical 2 Week. I can’t believe it. I can’t believe I’m going to say, of the three years, 2007, BASED SOLELY ON THE STRENGTH OF HIGH SCHOOL GODS DAMNED MUSICAL 2, WON THIS FAKE ACCOLADE ON THIS LITTLE-READ BLOG. I forgot “Clothes Off!” dropped this week. This is all HSM2. Wow. What a week this turned out to be. When I was makin’ these lists, when I saw all the High School Musical 2 droppin’, I said, “2007 is dead in the water.” BUTCHA KNOW WHAT HAPPENED?!

2017: 12 1997: 11 2007: 11

2007 has won three of the last four weeks. Don’t call it a comeback, because 2007 never left. History is permanent, it would be weird if the entirety of 2007 disappeared even for a second. And next week, the last selection remaining from HSM2, “Fabulous,” will team up with 50 Cent to take on “Barbie Girl” and what appears to be /sigh/ an Avicii tune. Will the dream die? FIND OUT!

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