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explorevenus · 1 year

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something permanent, pt. 2 ♡ yandere!leon kennedy x reader

nsfw (18+) - minors pls pls pls dni!!! i’m so for serious rn

find pt. 1 here! ♡

find pt. 3 here! ♡

reminder that this is a dark fic!! if any of the following bothers you, do not read: yandere!leon kennedy, kidnapping, manipulation, corruption/training, stockholm syndrome, forced daddy kink, forced breeding

word count - 3.9k

description - darling wakes up in the infirmary, all patched up after the events of pt. 1 -- upon her return home, leon and darling get to know and trust each other better... sort of. ((no smut in this one i’m sorry but i’m way too invested in this now so i’m Lore Building))

tags/warnings - yandere!leon kennedy, fem/afab!reader, kidnapping, medical stuff (no blood/gore this time tho), implied onset stockholm syndrome, forced daddy kink, pet names (princess, doll, sweetheart, etc.), dollification if u squint, leon is much sweeter in this one (he’s still deranged tho), a healthy dose of angst, darling misses her friends and family

a/n - AHHHHH i’m so glad y’all are liking this and want more of it. i was so honestly convinced i was going to get shunned for this. anyway enjoy some bonding time between leon and darling. it’s a little refreshing but it also doesn’t mean the deranged shit is over lololol. p.s. my ask box is aggressively open for business on ideas for this series. i love riffing w/ y’all about yandere leon, it’s my life blood, so don’t be shy ♡

my masterlist ♡

my ao3 ♡

taglist - @dollrxst @ifeelikeflying @nexyswrites @idekman111

fic below the cut, thanks so much for reading and i hope u enjoy !! ♡

- venus ♡

When you awoke again, you certainly felt much better. Refreshed, almost, if it weren't for the way the lights stung your eyes. The agonizing pain between your legs that was the last thing you remembered before you lost consciousness had subsided into a dull ache.

You reached up to rub the sleep from your eyes and properly observe your surroundings, quick to take notice of the IV line embedded in the back of your right hand. You blinked, looking around the room-- it was white and sterile, it certainly looked like a hospital but remembering the phone call Leon had in the car, you knew it wasn't exactly that. Even so, you were in a papery gown, laid on papery sheets, and an analog clock menacingly ticked away high up on the wall.

You were quick to sit up at the sound of distant footsteps growing nearer to the door-- the time you'd spent in Leon's "care" had kept you especially aware of the sound-- and as your dreary, horrified eyes locked on to the door you heard the beeps of your heartbeat monitor gain speed.

The heavy door swung open to reveal a doctor you weren't familiar with, and Leon was closely behind him. The doctor took in the sight of you awake with a content smile and piped up, "Ahh, there you are! Feeling better?"

Your mouth was dry. You nodded stiffly, shrinking toward the wall as if you could get any further away from them.

Leon shook his head and chided, "Words, princess. Be polite."

You swallowed nothing. "Y-Yes, doctor, I'm feeling better. Thank you."

"I'm glad to hear it," The doctor replied, checking over your vitals on the monitor to the left of your bed, absently marking down his findings on paper. "How about mentally?"

You blinked. "W-What?"

"Mentally," He repeated. "Leon told me what brought you here. Do you still feel you might be a danger to yourself?"

Mouth agape, eyes wide, you glanced over at Leon who gave you a cold look, no doubt in an attempt to remind you what you'd agreed upon before he brought you here.

You looked back to the doctor. "I'm sorry, what exactly did Leon tell you?"

"Do you not remember?" The doctor asked. "You lost quite a lot of blood, so memory loss is not uncommon in these scenarios. Why don't I step out for a few and let you chat while I check over your charts?"

Your eyes widened even further in a look that begged him not to leave you alone with Leon, but it didn't matter. Almost immediately, Leon told the doctor that sounded like a good idea and walked him to the door.

As soon as it swung shut, you piped up, "Leon, what did you say?"

He shrugged dismissively. "I said you had a breakdown while I was at work and I came home to you covered in blood."

It sounded... absurd. Even more absurd upon realizing that a real life medical doctor accepted that excuse. You scoffed. "Are you serious? You told the doctor I threw a fit for no reason and ripped my IUD out and he believed you?"

"I don't see why he wouldn't," He said smugly as he sat at the edge of the bed, taking hold of your hand. "There's a lot you don't know about me, doll. What I say definitely goes around here."

"Oh," You replied in a near whisper, swallowing dryly. "That's... nice."

The room went quiet and suddenly the air felt heavy. If you didn't feel fucked before you definitely felt fucked now. You reached weakly for the water bottle on the table beside you, but as soon as he noticed what you were reaching for he was quick to spring up from where he sat to grab it for you.

"I've got it, baby," He hummed, smoothing your hair out of your face as he perched the straw up to your mouth. "Don't overexert yourself, now."

As if I even could fucking overexert myself with the monumental task of grabbing a water bottle, you thought, casting your gaze to the floor as you sipped idly through the straw. Even facing away from him you could feel his cobalt eyes boring into you, burning holes in your skin. You nearly shivered, but suppressed it.

Soon after, the door opened and the doctor returned. "All caught up, you two?" He asked jovially.

"Uh, y-yes, thank you," You forced a smile.

"Good," He hummed. "You should be alright to head home now. I've prescribed some antibiotics for you to take as a precaution. We don't want you getting infected-- it could lead to infertility."

Is that so? You thought, clenching your jaw. "Infertility?" You asked.

"Yes, unfortunately. Leon told me you two are trying, so I figured we should play things on the safe side," He said.

You felt Leon's grip on your hand tighten. The word alone clearly stressed him out.

"That being said," The doctor continued, "I would advise you to avoid sex for at least six weeks. There was some trauma to the cervix that's going to need time to heal, and again, we don't want to risk infection."

Leon's grip was nearly crushing the bones in your hand and even so, you couldn't help but crack a little smile. "You're absolutely right. We wouldn't want to risk anything, right, Leon?"

"Right," He agreed stiffly.

Those six weeks couldn't have possibly passed slower for Leon. He couldn't stop hating himself for what he'd done to you, putting you in so much pain, putting you at such high risk. He couldn't help but beat himself up over it.

He chose to bide his time by doting on his darling relentlessly, even more than usual. He took that entire first week off of work just so he could keep an eye on you at all hours of the day. Any little wince was met quickly with ibuprofen and a hot water bottle. He set an alarm on his phone to make sure you took your antibiotics at the same time every night. He was even more adamant about ensuring you were eating and sleeping enough. When he caught you getting restless, he would take you on little drives around the neighborhood.

The inability to have sex for six weeks left a lot of time for talking, something he hadn't realized he so sorely needed until he didn't have a choice. He did want to get to know you on your terms, to understand the intricacies of your life and the way your brain worked. Truthfully, he wanted to know everything there was to know about you.

That way, he could better understand what you really needed.

"Le-" You caught yourself, clearing your throat before starting again. "D-Daddy, can I ask you something?"

The blonde smiled softly, cupping your chin as you laid in bed together. He was spooning you tightly and some random crime show was playing softly from the TV, but you weren't convinced either of you were really paying attention to it. You could feel his eyes glued to you the entire time.

"Of course, princess. What's on your mind, hm?"

You swallowed nervously, looking down at the floor. "Am I... am I missing?"

"What do you mean?" He tilted his head.

"Like... my family, my friends. Are they looking for me?" You asked.

He shrugged. "You don't have to worry about that, honey. I have the resources to make that sort of thing go away."

Tears rimmed your eyes, but you didn't show it. You took a deep, controlled breath before nodding, "Oh... okay."

A few beats of silence passed, and you nearly gave it up, but you couldn't help but pry further.

"Y-You didn't really answer the question, though," You said quietly. "Are they looking for me?"

"What does it matter?" He tightened his arm around your waist, nibbling at your ear, "You're safe with me. I intend to give you everything you'll ever need. That's no one else's business but ours."

You didn't think he realized he'd given you the answer without saying it explicitly. Your chest wound up into a knot, your stomach dropping. You couldn't stop thinking about how awful your loved ones must feel, begging for answers to your disappearance only to be met with doors slammed in their faces because Leon somehow managed to keep everything and everyone under his thumb.

Including you.

An image flooded your brain of your little apartment collecting dust as your closest friends and family entered with their keys to find everything exactly as you'd left it. You could see them all wandering your space, trying not to touch anything, scouring every inch for clues and perhaps realizing how much of your things were missing. Would they think you left on your own accord? Would they give up when they realized the authorities wouldn't help them?

Had they given up already?

The dam broke and you couldn't suppress your feelings any longer. You began to weep, tears spilling out over your cheeks as you involuntarily curled back into Leon's warm chest for some semblance of comfort. In your defense, he was pretty good at providing it, and at times like this it was just easier to give in.

He shushed you softly, petting your hair away from your face, pressing soft kisses to your temple. "I've got you, sweetheart. You're okay. Just let it out."

Something about him telling you to let it out made you really let it out. Your eyes screwed shut and you began to bawl, gripping his strong forearms to pull him closer as if he could possibly do so-- you were practically tangled around each other. You shifted your hips and turned over in his arms, burying yourself in his broad, bare chest, wetting his smooth skin with your anguish. He didn't care, he just held you tight and rubbed your back, whispering sweet praises and comforting affirmations into the crown of your hair.

"You're okay, princess. You're alright," He spoke lowly, lips brushing softly over the top of your head. He smelled so good, like cedarwood body wash, like fresh aftershave, like protection. "Poor baby. I know it hurts, but you've been such a good girl for me. Such a brave, sweet girl."

You went truly boneless, melting into his warmth, gripping him close like he'd just disappear if you let go. The irony was not lost on you-- you knew it was wrong to bask in his affection, to cry for comfort from the man who'd caused all your problems to begin with, but what choice did you have? You spent so much of your days alone now that you were starting to get sick of yourself.

It felt like you were going crazy. Every morning he would leave for work and you would feel some kind of relief for maybe an hour or two before you found yourself missing him. Longing for someone to talk to, someone to hold you and kiss you and just be in your presence. Longing for the way he'd play with your hair and rub your back, dote on your every need, even the way he'd mark up your body with his teeth. 6:00 p.m. would roll around and you'd find yourself restlessly pacing the room, glancing over at the door, pressing your ear up against it to listen, gazing out the locked window to search for his car.

When he'd walk in you'd try really hard to pretend like you weren't so eagerly waiting for him, but you think he was starting to catch on to your lowered guard. It almost seemed like in return, his guard was lowering as well. He still remained vigilant about keeping the doors and windows locked when he wasn't home, but every now and then he would take you out into the living room, let you hang out in the kitchen while he cooked for you, let you sit by the sliding glass door to sunbathe and gaze into the backyard.

The strangest part of it all was you didn't really feel inclined to take advantage of his leniency. He kept his eyes on you at all times, so it's not like you had much of a chance to misbehave even if you wanted to, but knowing deep down that Leon had his resources and his ways of being able to track you down if you were to disappear made the prospect of escape that much less enticing.

In fact, making a break for it was starting to feel more dangerous and scary than just staying put.

Leon's voice, a low whisper, broke you out of your hazy confliction. "What do you need, puppy? What can I do to make you feel better, huh?"

"J-Jus' want daddy," You sniffled, haze settled over your brain, body aching and trembling with upset.

"You've got me. I'm right here, pup," He soothed, swiping your tears away from your reddened cheeks. "Poor baby... I'm right here."

It wasn't long before his hushed reassurances and gentle touch, coupled with the pure exhaustion of crying, lulled you into a deeper sleep than you had had since day one.

When you woke up the next morning you felt... weird, to say the least. After having cried it out your brain was much clearer now, and with that came the sickening realization of what you'd let happen last night. After all, from the second your tired eyes pried open, the first thing you noticed was Leon's arms still wrapped tightly around you. Suddenly you felt nauseous, disgusted with yourself.

You laid still as stone in his hold, trying your hardest not to move in fear of waking him. Perhaps last night you couldn't stand the thought of being alone with your thoughts but now you felt that was all you needed. You casted your eyes to the alarm clock next to the bed-- it was 5:45 a.m. 15 minutes until Leon's alarm would go off and he would have to get up, get ready and leave for work. Then you would truly be alone.

You couldn't pry your eyes away from the glowing red numbers, seconds stretching into what felt like hours as you waited impatiently for the alarm to sound. Your eyes dried and went sore before you remembered you needed to blink.

The soft peachy sunlight peeking in through the window would have been quite pleasant in any other circumstance. These days, it just came as a sore reminder of the time you'd lost locked in a psychopath's bedroom 24 hours a day. You thought of how nice it felt every now and then when he would let you accompany him to other areas of the house, and how much nicer it would be if you could just leave whenever you wanted. How nice it would feel to have that peachy sunrise beam directly on your skin. How nice it would feel to have grass between your toes, to drive a car again, to go to a restaurant.

With that reality just on the other side of the glass, it was as if the universe was laughing in your face. Dangling what you needed right in front of you and telling you that you couldn't have it. You might have started crying again if you hadn't drained yourself dry last night.

It suddenly dawned on you that if you had any sort of chance of escape, now would be the time. The likelihood of you being pregnant was incredibly slim, given recent events, and he trusted you more than ever by now. You weren't sure how you were going to pull it off, but you didn't have any choice but to try.

Your brain melded into a mush of ideas-- you could try the window, but the bedroom was on the second floor and it wouldn't be much use trying to jump out if you were just going to break your legs on the way down and have him find you that way upon his return home. You had tried jamming the lock on the door before and he'd caught you every time. There was no way he wouldn't catch you trying it now.

Your burning eyes trailed away from the alarm clock-- 5:53 a.m.-- and began to wander the room. Although there wasn't an inch of it you hadn't explored by now, you couldn't help but think there had to be something you could use to take the doorknob off. Anything even remotely resembling a screwdriver would be worth a try. Of course Leon wasn't stupid enough to leave tools lying around for you to play with, but perhaps you could find a viable work-around in something otherwise mundane. A nail file, a coin, tweezers, anything.

You were also painfully aware of how easy it might be for him to find you once you'd escaped, if you could escape. If you had any hope of getting the fuck out of town and hiding out, you would have to get to your apartment first, where your wallet was probably still collecting dust on your bedside table. If you could scrape up enough cash to catch a train or a Greyhound bus, you could be states away before he even got off work. Despite the nagging voice in the back of your head screaming this is a bad idea, all you could think about was how much it would be worth the risk if you managed to pull it off.

If I could manage to get the doorknob off, maybe I can get through the front door, too, and if not, maybe I could smash the sliding glass wi--

The alarm clock began screeching, signaling the start of Leon's day and reminding me you that you were supposed to be pretending to sleep. You screwed your eyes shut and shuffled around in his arms at the noise like you usually would, not wanting to arouse any suspicion that you weren't really sleeping.

Apparently, that wasn't sufficient.

"How long have you been awake, sweetheart?"

The first words out of his mouth. Fuck.

You shrugged innocently. "I don't know. Fifteen minutes or so."

He reached over you to shut off the alarm, tucking your hair behind your ear so he could cup your cheek and look into your eyes. "Hmm. Did you sleep alright?"

"Yeah, I slept pretty well, actually," You replied, looking right back into his own cobalt eyes as if to sell what you were saying even further. "I must be sleeping on your schedule now."

"Must be," He hummed, leaning in to lazily kiss your forehead.

It was a normal response, and maybe you were just being paranoid, but something about the tone in his voice made you feel like he didn't really believe you. You tried as hard as you could to force yourself not to react. You couldn't risk making him suspicious of you when you wholly planned on executing your escape today.

The two of you laid in silence for a few minutes, not atypical for him to want to snuggle for a while in the mornings, but eventually he really had to get out of bed and take a shower. Leon gave you a quick peck on the lips before disentangling himself from you, slinking out from beneath the covers and heading to the bathroom to wash up for the day.

You only really felt safe again once you heard the water running, letting out a deep, labored breath you hadn't realized was stuck deep inside your lungs.

Still, you had a job to do for now, and that job was acting normal.

You rose from the bed, turning on the lights and perusing the closet for something to wear. For the first few weeks you were there, Leon would return home for the day with more and more of your belongings, including clothes, and you had deduced it was because he was gradually moving your entire life into his bedroom. That being said, it was sort of nice to at least be surrounded by your own things and able to wear your own clothes.

Settling on a soft sweater and leggings, you gathered your outfit from where the items were neatly folded and began dressing yourself. On Leon's days off he preferred to pick your clothes out for you-- and dress you himself-- but on days like today when he had to get to work and wasted too much time cradling you in bed, he just didn't have the time, which was sort of a relief.

Once you were dressed you sat at the edge of the bed, turning on the TV to click through random channels. It was nice to have a glimpse into the outside world every now and again. You passed by a blur of morning cartoons, tabloid talk shows and sports recaps in search of a cooking show or a documentary or something, but as you flipped through the channels you saw a familiar face and nearly passed out. You quickly switched back to the news channel.

"--friends and family allege authorities have been no help in the search for the missing girl, leaving them to take matters into their own hands. Concerned loved ones have searched the vacant apartment for clues, attempted to track her devices and have left missing posters all over the city, each and every one, they say, has vanished within hours..."

Your heart sank deeply into your stomach. Tears welled up in your eyes. The fire to escape roared even louder within you. You had to put your hand over your mouth to quiet yourself as you began to cry.

The familiar face on the screen was you.

The image quickly switched over from your face to footage of your distraught friends and family speaking through tears.

"We don't know what's going on, if this is a cover-up or just negligent policing. All we want is answers to what happened to her. She was never the type to up and leave without saying a word. If she's out there somewhere hearing this, we want her to know that all we want is for her to come home. We hope she's safe, wherever she is, and on the off-chance she really did leave on her own, we just want to know why--"

The sound of the shower water shutting off jolted you back into focus. You hurriedly changed the channel back to the cartoons and wiped the tears off your face with lightning speed. Try as you might to relax, you knew you were still stiff, but you needed to compose yourself.

The bathroom door opened, warm steam rolling out in his wake as Leon re-entered the room in nothing but a towel hung low on his waist, water droplets peppering his alabaster skin.

"Cartoons this morning, huh?" He asked, smooching the crown of your head.

You shrugged apathetically. "Couldn't find anything better to watch, I guess."

He got dressed and gathered his things, keys jangling in his large hand as he gave you another kiss on the lips and took ahold of your chin, forcing you to look into his eyes.

"Have a good day, princess," He said. "Behave yourself for me, okay?"

There was definitely something in his tone that indicated he knew something you didn't. You nodded hesitantly.

"O-Okay, daddy, I will."

"Good girl," He said flatly, squeezing your jaw just a little bit, almost like a show of power, before walking out the door with a distinct click of the lock behind him.

Maybe you wouldn't be escaping today after all.

find part 3 here! ♡

#venustext #sintext #emotext #resident evil #leon kennedy #yandere!leon kennedy #dark!leon kennedy #leon kennedy x reader #yandere!leon kennedy x reader #dark!leon kennedy x reader #something permanent

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explorevenus · 1 year

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better off ♡ leon kennedy x reader

nsfw (18+) - minors dni !!! not smut just heavy/adult themes + angst

this fic contains mentions/descriptions of self harm in the form of alcoholism and scratching. if that bothers or triggers you, please do not read!!!! take care of yourself first.

word count - 3.2k

description - it’s been a month since leon packed up and left you out of nowhere, cutting you off completely and without explanation. late at night, there’s a knock at your door, and there’s only one person it could be.

tags/warnings - vendetta!leon (aka leon in his alcoholism era), fem!reader, reader and leon are both emo without each other, self indulgent angst/comfort, breakup/makeup, hurt/comfort, no use of (y/n), reader doesn’t know what leon does for work, mention/brief description of self harm (reader was scratching at her arm), i think that’s all but lmk if i missed anything !

a/n - yeah so i wrote this literally a year ago and it’s just been rotting in my documents since then bc i never really had plans to post it but we love a good angsty leon fic every now and again so i hope y’all enjoy <3 can’t promise there will be more of this in the future as i am not the best at writing angst but lmk what y’all think and maybe we can talk about it hehehe

taglist - @tosuckmyweenis @dollrxst @alicerosejensen

my masterlist ♡

my ao3 ♡

fic below the cut - thanks so much for reading and i hope u enjoy ♡

- venus ♡

You felt achy. All over.

Physically, of course, but also mentally. Psychologically. This horrible, hollow pain that radiated from your tight chest and crept into your brain, settled in your sour stomach. Through the fog of noise in your head, somewhere between stagnant and rambling, you passively realized you couldn't remember the last time you'd eaten, showered, blinked... Your eyes were so dry, it stung a bit when you forced them shut. The hum of the ceiling fan continued.

Your bed didn't even feel comfortable anymore, but you couldn't care enough to move-- your hair was dangerously close to matting, the air in the room hung stiff, the bedding was well overdue for a wash, but... when you got close enough, his pillow still faintly smelled like him, so you held it. The stray shirt of his that you'd found mixed in with your dirty laundry still faintly smelled like him, so you wore it. His spare toothbrush sat untouched on the bathroom counter, right where he'd left it. To dare moving anything from his intended place for it felt like a crime.

It had been just over a month since Leon had left you. It was so sudden, so utterly shattering, and as he disappeared into that night you were never given a chance at closure. For days you tried calling, texting, left voicemail after embarrassing voicemail until one day your texts began failing to deliver, and your calls would no longer go through. He'd blocked you. Beyond any and all parameters of how you'd ever expected to lose him, he was just... done with you. You apparently didn't even deserve a response from him. You didn't deserve closure. You couldn't stop analyzing all of your interactions in the preceding weeks, trying to think if you'd noticed him being cold or dismissive, telltale symptoms of the ick, but you came up with nothing.

Eighteen months of the most intimate love and connection you'd ever experienced with another person, all rendered nothing overnight. That night...

It was a biting January evening. A slow work day. You finished up your work early and were able to head home at a rare 3:30 pm, but unfortunately, Leon was stuck late at work.

Again.

You weren't mad at him, of course-- far from it. You felt so bad for him. His entire life he'd done nothing but work himself to the bone for other people and you truly wondered how often he was even given his proper dues for that. You had never met someone so self-destructive in their altruism as him. On top of that, it didn't help that he wasn't allowed to share any of the details of his work with you, let alone anyone else. He had stressed to you time and time again how insanely classified the vast majority of his job is, and while you certainly believed him, you just felt so powerless to sit back and watch the toll it was taking on him.

That's not to say you didn't try your absolute best to be there for him in every other way possible, though-- when things got particularly bad you would make sure he was eating, sleeping, getting the love and attention he deserved. You'd do just about anything to put a smile on his tired face, to take his mind off of things for a while. Typically, you were at least somewhat successful, but for how long was a whole other demon. Of course you were happy to do these things for him, it was truly no problem if it meant easing his pain, but after a certain point it became evident that you were fighting a losing battle, and it terrified you.

It wasn't until almost 10:00 pm that his key slid into the lock, and he stepped into your shared apartment. Upon hearing him, you perked up from your spot on the bed, slipping out from beneath the covers to greet him, but just before you reached the bedroom door, it swung open and he charged into the room. His steps were heavy, his jaw and shoulders tense-- it stunned you for a moment. You weren't sure how to interpret what was happening until he started gathering his things.

"Leon, are you okay? What's going on?" You asked, still frozen in place by the door.

He didn't even look at you as he continued haphazardly shoving clothes into his duffel bag. "I'm sorry, I can't do this anymore."

"What?"

"I just don't think this is going to work out. I love you, but I have to leave."

You could have been shot. Suddenly your legs were numb and wobbling to uphold your own weight, and you went completely cold, like the blood had drained from your body. "W-What? Where is this coming from? What did I do wrong?"

"It's nothing you did," He answered as he zipped the bag. "We just can't be together." He turned on his feet to leave again. It was like adrenaline kicked in and you scrambled to follow him.

Grasping at the sleeve of his jacket, tears flooding your eyes, you were in absolute disbelief. You never saw this coming in a million years and even if you had, you never could have prepared yourself for what it'd feel like to lose him. "Leon, please don't do this," You wept, nails biting into the leather, trying as you might to pull him back while knowing you weren't nearly strong enough. "Please talk to me. I-I don't understand--"

He turned to face you suddenly, and it was then that you were finally able to see that his beautiful blue eyes were rimmed with tears, too. Oh how those tears enhanced the crystalline nature of his gorgeous blue, turning from calm shoreline to deep ocean. It was such a beautiful sight you never hoped to see again. "I know you don't understand."

Those simple words only twisted the knife. "I want to!" You cried.

"You can't!" Leon shouted back. With each passing second you felt yourself sinking into the floor, wasting away right before him. You wanted the Earth to open beneath you and swallow you up. You wanted this to just be a sick nightmare. "You can't. It's nothing you did or didn't do, you couldn't have done anything differently. This just isn't going to work."

He started towards the door again, but while he might be much stronger than you, he isn't faster-- before you even really thought about it you had slipped between him and the door, blocking his path. "Don't shut me out! I love you, Leon, I want to fix this, but I can't do anything if you don't tell me what's wrong! Please, I can't even imagine my life without you in it--" Your breath caught on your own tears, cutting off your miserable rambling. For a moment he hesitated, and you wondered if you'd actually managed to get through to him. Voice shaking, you continued, "Please don't leave. I love you."

With a deep sigh, he rested his hand on your shoulder, and you were so ready to let your guard down that you didn't realize you'd misinterpreted until it was too late. He simply nudged you out of the way and turned the handle. "I'm sorry, sweetheart. Take care."

"No!" You sobbed, trying to grab him by his jacket again but he wasn't letting it happen this time. "Leon! Don't do this! Don't leave!" He just kept walking, his figure receding down the hall as you collapsed to your knees in the doorway. "D-Don't leave..." Your words broke miserably, fading as he turned the corner and disappeared from your sight. You cared little about bothering your neighbors at this point. You could only cry in the wake of him.

There was a clumsy knock at the door, loud enough for you to have heard it from the bedroom. You froze, feeling anxiety overtake you at the sound, but you tried to tell yourself it was just a package being delivered or something. Holding your breath, you waited, and then came another knock, even louder this time. Your arm slipped out from beneath the covers, reaching for your phone to check the time-- 1:34 am. Definitely not the mailman.

Your heart sank. With great strain you forced yourself out of bed, bones creaking in sync with the floorboards, telling yourself over and over in your head that it was probably just one of your neighbors, or maybe the landlord. You grabbed a random pair of pajama shorts off the floor to preserve your modesty, stumbling into them with weak muscles, given you'd practically been in bed for a month straight. You turned the light on in the kitchen as you passed through, approaching the door, which was given yet another considerably loud knocking. Nervously, you raised yourself up on your tip toes and looked through the peephole.

And, just like that, the wind was knocked out of you.

Trembling, you hurried to unlock the door and swung it open. You didn't even have a chance to say anything before he stumbled inside, nearly taking you out in the process. Surprised, you took a step backwards for your own safety and he nudged the door shut again with his foot.

"Baby, I miss you," Leon slurred, coming closer as you moved away from him, that is until your back came up against the closet beside the door. "I thought you'd be better off without me, but I can't do it. I can't stay away from you."

The stench of straight bourbon hung around him, clung to his every word. You stuttered, "Y-You've been drinking..."

He put his hand on the wall next to your head to steady himself, the other brushing your hair behind your ear in what you guessed was a less than graceful attempt to be intimate in his drunkenness. "Baby, I'm sorry, okay? I only ever w-wanted to protec-ct you," He hiccupped. "I-I just wanted to keep you safe. But I just... I have to have you. Just let me have you again, baby."

As badly as you missed him, as much time as you'd spent withering away in bed, craving to have him back, something about his drunken pleading was sort of... pissing you off. The fact that he'd just up and left so harshly, so out of the blue, with zero explanation, and had the gall to get shitfaced and show up on your doorstep in the middle of the night begging for your forgiveness... it was insulting. Almost laughably so.

Planting a weak hand on his chest, you pushed him away, which wasn't hard to do given his intoxication, and you slipped past him to walk into the kitchen. "I'm sorry, you wanted to protect me? From what? And in order to do that you had to just pick a random day to rip my fucking heart out and disappear for a month?" Your volume, your anger heightened with every single word, like this entire time your depression had just been boiling inside you, melding into the deepest form of resentment. "I seriously can't believe you right now. This is fucking stupid."

He clambered after you, reaching for your arm but settled for resting his hand on your back when you swatted him away. "I know, I-I'm sorry... I shouldn't have done it the way I did. If I could take it all back I w-would--"

"But you can't, Leon! I will never get back the weeks I've spent in bed, wishing I would just fucking die. I've barely slept, I've hardly been going to work, I haven't been eating, because I can't even keep anything down-- I don't even feel like a fucking person anymore. Did you think I was just going to shrug and move on with my life? You fucking ruined me!" You couldn't even look at him as you screamed, even if you wanted to your vision was blurred with tears and you didn't want to let him see you crying right now. You busied yourself with getting a glass of water for him instead. At least if he sobered up you could have an actual conversation. "Are you even going to explain yourself? Or is it yet another one of those 'confidential' things I'll just have to make peace with never knowing the truth about?"

"Well.. p-part of it, I guess, but you have to believe me when I say I can't tell you. It wouldn't just be my life on the line, but yours too, and I would never take that risk," He was still slurring his words, which made it incredibly hard to take him seriously. It really only seemed to pour salt on the wound. Rolling your eyes, you slid him the glass of water and leaned back against the countertop. "W-What's this for?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Would it kill you to drink something that doesn't have liquor in it?"

He scoffed. "Babe--"

"Just drink the fucking water, Leon."

He obliged, to humor you if nothing else, but you did hope it would help. It was almost embarrassing how willing you were to nurture him, given what he'd put you through, but he thoroughly looked like hell, and you weren't going to let him waste away. Though, now that there was a gap in the argument, and you had a chance to breathe, you caught a glimpse of your own reflection in the oven, and, well, you weren't looking so hot either. Your dark circles were pitiful, and your eyes bloodshot. You sincerely looked like you'd had the shit beaten out of you. Your lips were cracked, your tongue stuck to the roof of your dry mouth and your hair was thickly knotted, collarbones peeking out of his shirt that was obviously very well slept in.

His voice brought you out of your daze. "Honey, your arm..." Suddenly he was approaching from behind, taking a gentle hold of your left arm, and though at first it took you a second to realize, you quickly jolted away from him, pulling your arm up to your chest.

Your back collided with the oven, and you turned your head away. "It's nothing."

"Y-You've been hurting yourself again--"

"So have you!" You yelled, but you knew it was a weak defense. About as quickly as you'd heated up, you'd gone cold, sinking away from him and still having a hard time meeting his eyes as he gently took hold of your arm again to look at it. His thumb skimmed over your skin with a featherlight touch, tracing the winding red trails that stung in their healing. "I-It's just scratches, I haven't been cutting or anything..."

Leon just shook his head, drawing you into his chest, and this time you didn't try to fight it. You let him hold you. He wrapped you up in his arms, rubbing your back, and as your head laid on his broad chest it felt like a broken piece of your life had just been laid softly back into place. "It's not just scratches, and you're right, I shouldn't be drinking," He sighed into your hair. "I guess we've both fallen back into old habits."

As much as you wanted to convince yourself that it was the water, you had a sore feeling that it was the shock of recognizing the state of you that sobered him up. Either way, the return of some level of coherence to his words was an immense comfort. Tearfully, you whispered into his shirt, "Yeah, I guess so."

"I really am sorry about the way I ended things between us," Leon sniffled, holding you a little tighter as if he were pleading with you to just listen to him. "My job is very dangerous, and very demanding. If something were to happen to me, or god forbid to you, because of me, I don't know that I'd ever be able to forgive myself. I-I know it's stupid, but I thought that the only way I could keep you safe was to remove myself from you completely."

"Leon... what have you gotten yourself into?"

He let out a hollow, defeated chuckle. "It's... it's a long story, sweetheart."

Pulling away from his chest just enough to allow yourself the space to look up at him, you asked, "Are you ever gonna be able to tell me what it is that you do every day?"

"Nothing's impossible, I guess-- maybe someday."

Maybe someday, huh? A sense of relief washed over you, not at the idea that you might eventually be let in on this big confidential secret, no-- in fact, you sincerely doubted that he'd ever be able to tell you at all, and was probably just saying that in an attempt to make you feel better-- but the way he'd worded it implied a future with you in it. A distant future.

Leon himself had always joked that it was never a good idea to plan very far ahead in his life. This meant something.

But it wasn't over yet, and you were far from ready to forgive him. "How can I trust that you're not just going to up and leave me again?"

For a second he seriously hesitated to respond, clearly fighting with himself internally over the right words to say. You couldn't blame him, but it was an important question that you felt more than deserved an answer at this point. Tucking your hair behind your ear, he replied, "Now that I know what it's like to try to live without you, I don't think I can ever put myself through that again. As miserable as I was, as much as I wish I could take that time back, it... taught me a lot about what's important to me. It taught me a lot about what I really want in life."

Now it was you having a hard time coming up with a response.

Taking note of this, he continued. "Look, I know I fucked up. And, again, I'm sorry. I can't justify it, it was a brash decision made in a vulnerable moment and I never should have lashed out at you like that. I know I don't deserve a second chance after what I've put you through, but I-I promise... I swear, that if you just let me, I will do whatever it takes to make this right. I want to be with you. I love you."

The answer was obvious. Of course getting back together wouldn't come without its trials, without repentance... but you loved him too. You wanted to be with him too. And, in your shared pain, your mutual longing for each other, you supposed you could allow one night to pretend like everything was okay again. Holding him was certainly more satisfying to the soul than holding his unwashed pillow.

You took a deep breath and sank into his chest again, burying your face into his shirt. He was so warm. "I love you too," You whispered. "It's late. We should get to bed."

This response stunned him for a moment, his hands that were softly rubbing your back just a second ago halted in their movement as it sank in. After a few seconds he dipped down to kiss the crown of your head before asking quietly, as if he were nervous of your response, "You mean together, right?"

You nodded. "Together. Please."

#venustext #emotext #resident evil #leon kennedy #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy angst #vendetta!leon kennedy #vendetta!leon kennedy x reader

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