#dont be mad at me its really not my fault tbh | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

whyse7vn · 7 months

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BREAKING POINT -

[ ot7 x reader ]

this is like super short pls forgive me tan twitter tl for context

tan on twitter!!!

8 participants - 8 online

———————————

tae: yoongi pls unblock me on twitter

yoongi: kill yourself

tae: i tried guys why doesn’t he love me 💔

y/n: that was a pathetic try

tae: guess what

y/n: what?

tae: ligma man..

y/n: ligma??

jimin: no way 😭

jk: baby…

namjoon: really

y/n: WHAT???

jin: i’m with her

wtf you guys on about??

hobi: this is a sad day

tae: LIGMA FUCKING BALLS BITCH

y/n: drown

jimin: ur fault tbh

hobi: real

y/n: leave me alone

jin: look you made her upset idiots

y/n: IM NOT UPSET

hobi: cheer up baby ❤️

namjoon: it’s okay tae upsets me all the time

y/n: im fine

hobi: bts song

jk: i know bts

tae: me 2

y/n: i want to stab you with a pencil

tae: watch out namjoon

namjoon: she is definitely talking to you

tae: proof?

hobi: bts?

jimin: i’m gonna bts outta you shut the fuck up

hobi: aw man :/

jk: bts?

jin: beat the shit

tae: beat MY shit

jk: woah

yoongi: he actually needs to kill himself wow

tae: @y/n u 2

y/n: LEAVE ME ALONE

jimin: she’s mad

y/n: I’M NOT MAD

jin: y/n are you still with that scoups guy?

namjoon: didn’t we just find out they we’re together like a week ago?

jk: WE DID????

jin: she moves on fast tho so idk

y/n: NO I DONT????

jimin: yoongi mingyu jk scoups mark wonho minho san all of us

there’s more hold on i’m thinking

hobi: all of us?

jk: say sike…

y/n: ARE YOU FUCKING SICK???????

jin: woah major slut alertttttt

namjoon: shut up

y/n: ONLY LIKE 4 OF THOSE NAMES ARE RIGHT

jk: what

y/n: AND IVE ONLY FUCKED 2 OF THEM SO KILL YOURSELF LEAVE ME ALONE

yoongi: she’s a grown woman

y/n: RIGHT

sorry i’m hot as fuck and pull bitches it’s not my fault

jin: u mid

y/n: ur 30

jin: ok please leave me alone i’m sorry

tae: my body count is also 2

jimin: -2

tae: ummmm?

jk: i’ve killed no one

i could of but don’t worry

namjoon: ??

hobi: fyi she did not deny being with scoups

jimin: TRUE

jk: NO

y/n: i deny it

jimin: too late we know

jin: SLUT

sorry

pls i’m sorry i didn’t mean it pls don’t be mean to me

please oh my god i’m sorry it slipped out

love u

please

y/n: THIS IS NOT FEMINISM

namjoon: it’s okay if ur with him

jk: NO ITS NOT STOP SAYING THAT WHATS UR FUCKING ISSUE STUPID STUPID STUPID

y/n: IM NOT

tae: who have you fucked

yoongi: are you stupid?

tae: no i’m curious

hobi: OH IM CURIOUS YEAH

wow i love shinee

y/n can you please start talking to minho again and then get married to him so i can be at his wedding and we can be forever connected

jk: SHUT UR MOUTH

y/n: you guys know so much about my relationship life it actually makes me want to throw up

jimin: ur easy to stalk

hobi: she’s fucked jk and yoongi

tae: and me

jin: in dreams doesn’t count

yoongi: lol

tae: LOL AWAY FROM ME YOU NASTY BITCH

U THINK UR WINNING BUT UR FUCKING NOT

WHEN ME AND Y/N GET MARRIED IT WILL BE ME KIM TAEHYUNG WHO LOLS IN UR FUCKING FACE

YOU RAT

yoongi: L

tae: no

yoongi: O

tae: YOU FUCKING STOP RIGJT NOW MIN YOONGI

yoongi: L

tae: 6pm seoul south korea apartment block C floor 7 door number 279 a ak47 a man a mask and a fucking dream

namjoon: wow ok that’s great!!

nice vogue shoot btw jungkook!

jk: I WILL NOT FUCK U GO AWAY

namjoon: oh my fucking god

hobi: scottish pride!!

jimin: ???

hobi: was he not wearing a kilt?

jimin: a what?

hobi: killing myself

jin: why they put you in that dirty ass bathroom omg?

tae: dirty shoot for a dirty man

jin: ?

tae: what?

jin: just a bit crazy coming from u

y/n: tae you need to shower

tae: you in love

fucking bitch

jin: do you fuck her or fight her damn?

jimin: right he’s pissing me off

tae: can you leave me alone i’m going through a lot rn

jk: dick

tae: ??

jk: a lot of dick

yoongi: lmao

namjoon: he likes men?

hobi: ewwwwwwwwwwww

jimin: homophobia?????????

jk: yes so he’s going through them

cuz he does not like y/n

yoongi: you say this like every 2 weeks

jk: because it is true

y/n: thank god

jk: no thank men

hobi: thx men

jin: so it’s not jimin?

jimin: what??

tae: i’ve never touched another man let alone sleep with one

hobi: amen

y/n: now that is just not true

namjoon: who cares

tae: I DO

hobi: no one will ever say those words to you

jin: i will

tae: fr 🥲?

jin: LOL

tae: ok kys

and fuck that bitch y/n

yoongi: have

tae left “tan on twitter”

hobi: cuteness overload ^_^

y/n: what crawled up his ass today tf

jk: hi do you need me do you want me do you love me

namjoon: can we just talk about life or like

jin: let me guess trees?

jimin: weed?

jk: OH MY GOD NAMJOON WANTS TO TALK ABOUT WEED

hobi: life is a downward spiral noting matters we are all slowly dying the government hates us money is worthless drugs are all around our water is running out

jk: where is it running out of

let’s catch it

y/n: tae was being super weird right?

hobi: super shy

namjoom: what’s new

hobi: new hair

namjoon: stop

hobi: forgive me master

namjoon: i’m at my breaking point

jimin: breaking bad

jin: drugs?

jimin: it all links back to namjoon…

jk: omgggggg namjoon is this true……..

namjoon: LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE

—-

pls lmk if you like the twitter concept idk if i’m feeling her yet but if you guys are i will do more idk trying to be different 🙈

280 notes · View notes

cupoftaae · 10 months

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Forever And A Day (KTH x READER) series ♡ sunrise in versailles (part 3) (chapter 15)

Summary: your lifelong friend is forced to face his true feelings for you once he breaks the number one rule of becoming friends with benefits: dont fall in love. He knows he loves you, but you on the other hand need more convincing of the most important thing: the right decision.

Genre: fwb. Roommates, friends to idiots to lovers, fluff, angst, smut, the whole 9 yards tbh.

Pairing: taehyung x female!reader

rating: 18+ (minors dni!!!)

word count- 5k

warnings- swearing, fighting (waaa), emotional distress, mentions of miscarriage, lots of sad shit tbh. I think this is all? lmk.

a/n-Hi m'loves, I hope ur all doing well and having a good summer so far!! I will update the main masterlist asap so all of the chapters are easily accessible through pinned post on my page! -Nini

"so....he's saying that it just happened and there wasn't necessarily any reasoning behind it. Its normal....its not your fault." Taehyung whispered, translating the english speaking doctor's words into Korean as you remained seating in a hospital bed.

No reasoning? normal?

You would scoff if you had the energy.

Instead, you just blinked a few times in understanding, putting your head back and looking up at the obnoxiously bright lights in the room. Really- they werent comforting in the slightest.

The doctor kept speaking to Taehyung, who then would refer to you, "they are....gonna give you medicine to help pass any, um, tissue? left inside..." his voice was thick, slicked with grief as he tried to explain everything.

After they handed you a few papers and pamphlets, they passed a bottle of pain reliever and extra medication into your hands, then pushed you out of the clinic, as if nothing happened, or if anything changed.

The car ride back to the hotel was quiet, you refused to even hold Taehyungs hand, which, yeah...you felt bad for shutting him out, because you know he was hurting just as much as you were, however you wanted to just process it by yourself. It perhaps was selfish to do so, but you didnt want to talk about it.

even with him.

"maybe its a good idea to look into a flight back home...?" he whispered, hand on your lower back as you walk back into the room. You winced before crawling onto the bed, hugging a pillow.

"no....." you mumbled, closing your eyes. The thought of going on a 12 hour plane ride in this condition made you queasy. You just wanted to lay in bed for the next few days to recover.

He put the stuff down and stood in front of the bed, looking down at his feet as his mind rambled of ways to help. "are you hungry?"

You shook your head.

"thirsty? You should probably have some water......do you want me to run you a bath-?"

"taehyung!" you looked over at him, he was taken back for a moment upon hearing your voice, the loudest you've spoken since the miscarriage began. "I want to be left alone, I dont need anything"

He frowned, "but you-"

"but nothing" you sighed, resting your head back down. You swallowed any trace of sadness in your voice, any signal you were ready to break down. "I just....I want to sleep."

"okay" he nodded, upset at your dismissive behavior. All he wanted was to hold you in this moment, for you two to mourn together so you can heal, and you were practically pretending he didnt exist.

He grabbed his cellphone and calmly left the room, walking out to clear his head. The weather was now much sunnier, air was hot but nice. He wondered what adventure you both would be up to right now if this never happened.

Reluctantly, he began to ring up his mother to discuss whats going on, knowing that you will probably be mad for doing it without you, but he needed someone to talk to so desperately.

"mom...." he whispered when the ringing on the other line stopped, signaling someone picked up.

"Taehyung? whats wrong?" her voice was groggy, He suddenly remembered that it was really late over in Busan, and she was most likely asleep.

"im sorry for calling so late" he mumbled, "I just really need to talk to you"

"what is it?" her voice was more awake now, obvious curiosity and panic.

He sighed, taking a breath as he looked around at the people walking down the street. "Y/N....this morning, she had a miscarriage." he swallowed roughly, feeling the familiar lump in his throat. "we just got back to the room after going to the clinic, shes okay, but she wont talk to me...and I know this doesnt concern you in the slightest, you were upset to begin with, but....im hurting mom." his voice cracked at the last sentence, face hiding into his arm.

He heard a stilling of breath on the other line.

Taehyungs mother wasnt all too pleased to hear you both were expecting a child together, but she never wished for something like this to happen, it was heartbreaking.

"ah my son... im terribly sorry my dear." she exhaled, "its okay to cry, its okay to be upset, you know?"

He sniffed, wiping his eyes with the collar of his shirt, "yeah but, I just wanna be with her and shes getting mad at me"

"Its a difficult situation, She is hurting just like you maybe even more, and she needs space....she will come around okay? where is she? where are you? did they specify what caused it?"

"im outside of our hotel, sitting on a bench, she doesnt want me in the room....and shes okay, they gave her medicine and stuff but they said it was natural, like nothing inflicted it or caused it"

She nodded on the other line "okay...maybe you both should come home. I know you worked hard to be there right now but if shes sick you guys need to be close to us. I will make some meals and bring them over so she doesnt have to cook, or you can just stay with us, whatever you two decide."

He brushed his hair with his fingers, listening to his mothers soft soothing tone, one he wasn't particularly used to hearing too often. "I asked her if we should go back and she said no"

"she wants to stay in a foreign country during this? what if something else happens?"

"I dont think she wants to deal with the plane ride" he sighed

"thats understandable, but she can just sleep the entire time, then i'll order a cab to our house straight from the airport, how does that sound?"

"I'll try to talk to her again about it, I just want her to be okay"

"she will be okay, but these things take time. She may not act like she needs you there with her but she does, go back to the room okay?"

"okay....thank you, I'll text you after, love you..." he mumbled, grateful that for once, his mother was supportive in such a time of pain.

"you showered?" he asked, walking back into the room as he saw you on the floor, looking out the large window by the bed. Your long wet hair gently dripping to the carpet below you.

"mhm" your eyes stayed glued to the city, watching cars drive around as the sun began to say its goodbyes, setting beautifully and coating the sky with a purple and orange tint.

His eyes looked down to the pillow in your lap, you squeezed it tightly.

"how...uh, how are you feeling physically?"

"mm" you shrugged, finally turning back to look at him. You were pale, and you looked exhausted. The dark bags under your eyes didnt lie. "im managing"

"you dont have to manage alone" he whispered, sitting beside you.

"taehyung..."

"y/n"

You looked at him as he sat on the carpet next to you, your body tightening up once more.

"why wont you let me be here for you?" he whispered, eyes directly on yours as he tilted his head. Taehyung didnt want to come off as aggressive or forceful.

You shook your head, eyes darting out the window once more. "I dont wanna talk about it"

"why no-"

"because it fucking kills me!" you cried out, covering your face, "it hasnt even been a day, im processing it, it doesnt feel real and I just..."

He looked at you, his own expression softening as he felt his stomach churn.

"I just wish it never happened" you choke out in a faint whisper

"I know baby, I know...." he mumbled, slowly bringing his arm to yours, pulling you into his lap. "me too, this is awful, I know it is, and I know I will never understand how you feel....but im hurting too. lets process this together? please?" his fingers laced through your hair as you softly cried, you could feel the exhaustion and emotion seeping through every ounce of your body. "I think we should just go home..."

"but you worked so hard to be here....we arent going..."

Taehyung sighed, "its not important. I...I called my mom and explained the situation, shes offering us a room at the house, she will cook for us and everything, allow you time to heal, and-"

You stopped crying, climbing off his lap and looking at him as if he slapped you in the face. "you called your mom? why? what?"

"I know, im sorry, I shouldve asked you if it was okay-"

"yeah you should have" you wiped your nose and stood up, huffing and tossing the pillow back onto the bed. "thats so....you dont need to go telling everyone. Not to mention she gave me shit when she found out I was pregnant, and now she wants to be all supportive? bull fucking shit"

He was taken back at your sudden outburst, he rose to his feet and turned to you "baby, hey, I know my parents arent the best but they are offering support right now, put all the fighting aside, she knows your hurting and is just trying to be nice"

"I dont care, I refuse to let her do that, especially given the fucking comments she through at me" you ran your hands through your hair. "I mean, shit, taehyung, my own mom didnt know I was pregnant yet and now I have to tell her I already miscarried?" you sighed "this is a lot on me! this is a lot mentally, and you cant just go telling people, im embarrassed"

"you shouldnt be"

"I am, I dont really want to be coddled or get sympathy calls and texts from people, I just want to be alone, and to be honest, I am really fucking mad at you right now"

He raised his brow, he was upset at your behavior but tried to understand the situation from your point of view. "okay..." he exhaled, "I get it, I know, and im sorry"

You threw your phone across the room, walking into the bathroom and shutting the door.

Taehyung felt lost, his attempt of helping seemed to only make shit worse for the both of you. How was one person supposed to navigate or fix the said situation? you wanted help, but you refused it.

He didnt want to leave again, but he grabbed his coat and walked out once more, this time it was to sit on the fire escape stairs out near the balcony.

It felt like hours, he cried, watching cars drive around. It was selfish, but he wished he was one of those people.

he wished he was away, he wished you and him were doing what you had originally planned for the day instead of this.

His heart was in his throat as it suddenly hit him, the loss of the child he had learned to grow so fond of. Taehyung had not known them for very long, but oh, he fell in love at the first heartbeat, the first sonogram that still sat in his wallet at this very moment.

He was in love the moment he walked into his bedroom and saw it as a nursery for the first time, eager to push everything out just so he can decorate it 7 months early.

The moment he saw your bump beginning to form, snapping photos left and right. The moments of holding your hair back so you didnt get vomit in it during your morning sickness days. The moments of him talking to your stomach late at night when you pretended to be asleep and watch.

Taehyung would whisper his fears but righten them as promises of love and nothing less. the role of a father.

It seemed so scary at first, but as he settled into it, the idea became somewhat comforting, at least knowing he wasnt alone.

But now what?

Where do you even start to pick up the pieces of loss of a life you never even got to taste?

Everything that was finally looking up was ripped away in a matter of moments. He was angry at the world, angry at himself, angry at the innocent people walking around below...but he wasnt angry at you, no matter how much you deflect his compassion.

He tossed his cigarette and began to look up at the stars, trying to mentally keep track of the number of them. It was something to distract his brain, it was something to do other than feel pathetic.

The slider door to the balcony slowly opened, presenting you tightly wrapped in a robe as your hair was now thrown into a pony tail.

Taehyung waved his hand, too afraid to speak up.

"I just got off the phone"

He nodded, looking over.

"with my mom" you exhale

"oh?" Taehyung sat up quickly as you walked over, sitting beside him.

"yeah" you whisper, of course you had been crying, there was no way to hide it. "I told her everything, mine as well not wait"

He nodded, unsure of how to react

Its quite for a moment, the overwhelming tension between you both choking you as the night sky blanketed the city, the air thick with love and grief.

"are you okay?" he whispered

"yes...or, will be anyways" you sniff, taking a deep breath and allowing your lungs to receive a moment of calmness for the first time today. "are you?"

He shrugged, looking at you. "mad..." he murmured, watching his heel continue to dig into the cigar that was already on the ground.

"mad?" you whisper

"yeah, mad."

"why?"

"because..." it was his turn to cry, his fists bunching up his white shirt. "I left you, I fucking left you while it happened."

You frown, watching his eyes look anywhere but your own. "My love...whether you were in the room or not, it still wouldve happened"

"At least you wouldnt have been alone..." he choked, "I keep getting images of how scary it mustve been, and how you kept calling me and I was just...not there"

You wiped your eyes, scooting closer to him.

"so fucking dumb, im so stupid. I hate everyone and im mad. Im angry, its not fair" he mumbled

You were unsure of what to say to him, opting to pull him into your arms as you embraced eachother.

"where were you anyways...?"

He sniffed, whispering lowly "I went to get you flowers, and breakfast" his cheeks were slightly red. "just my luck, I do something nice and the world spits in my face"

You couldnt help the small smile that found its way onto your lips, "well thats very sweet...."

"doesnt matter. it was dumb and I shouldnt have left you"

"you cant blame yourself for this" you look at him, turning his head so he sees you. "we need to stop blaming ourselves. This is going to take a while to recover from, and we gotta realize that now more than ever." you whisper, pressing your forehead to his.

He nodded, lifting slightly to kiss you delicately.

Taehyung held both of your hands as he rested his head on your shoulder.

"Im going home"

He sniffed, "you are? I think thats good, we dont have to stay at my moms house, I understand how awkward that might be for you, and it was my wrong doing to just go and talk behind your back. We can just go back to the apartment okay?"

You shake your head slowly, "no, Tae, home...Gwangju." you spoke into his ear gently, your hand running circles on his back. "I need to see my mom, I need time to recover, and to be honest, I need to recover from a lot more than just this one thing...."

He sat away, looking at you. "Gwangju?"

"yeah. Ive been thinking about going back for a while, remember? my mom isnt getting any younger and she still has troubles with her back. She wasnt doing too well when we visited. I need to be with my mom to help her, and so she can help me with everything Ive been dealing with, which....is a lot." you exhale, trying to offer a small laugh to lighten the mood. "she misses me too, all the time"

His face was contorted, mind racing. "well...okay..." he nodded slowly, "thats fine...when do we leave?"

You bit your bottom lip and looked at him, "not we, just me tae..."

Taehyung frowned, "what do you mean? you....are leaving without me?" his voice was thick with emotion as the realness of the sudden situation sunk in.

"yeah...not for long, I promise, I just need time-"

"what are you talking about?" he chokes out, standing up and looking down at you. "I offered to take you back home so we can recover and rest, I offered you anything I could, and you refused, now suddenly you are hot and eager to hop on a plane to Gwangju to....get away from me?"

"its not like that"

"then please explain what it is like because it seems as if life isnt the problem, its me"

You roll your eyes slightly, "stop jumping to conclusions, you know first hand how bad the past months have been, between kaito, the pregnancy, school, work and the drama with you and I. I lost all my friends, I switched to online classes just for the situation, I have to manage everything, all of my shit including yours"

"What do you mean?"

"its just a lot, tae, I am only one person. I love you, I really do, and I wish you would calm down so I can explain."

He sits, face in his hands.

"Listen" you begin "everything is just a lot right now, this...loss..." you whisper "it was the sole decider for me to make the move to go back home for a while. I need to fix some shit, because im not the best person, and I need to be away from people"

"you sound so crazy"

You scoff, looking at him, "crazy?"

"yeah, crazy. so what? we break up? you know, couples dont just leave or abandon eachother when something bad happens, you turn to them when you need support, just as we done with everything else so far." he tries to plead with you, hands trembling a bit. "I know its a lot for you, I know your body is tired physically and mentally, and I can only imagine how the past 24 hours have been, but....you do realize that I am hurting as well? this doesnt just involve you, it was my baby too?"

You sink into your seat, sighing as you shake your head, "obviously I know that"

"then why are you acting like its only your problem?" he winced, "we....we are missing out on so many experiences. we will never get to hold or see that baby ever, you think that doesnt rip my fucking heart out y/n??" his voice wavered, now slightly louder as he tried to get you to see his side. "this is so selfish, you are being so selfish"

You felt tears seep into your eyes, quickly getting up so he doest see your reaction as you open the slider, feet guiding you back into the cold hotel room.

"yeah run away" he scoffs, tears streaming down his face as he attempts to follow you, tossing his jacket to the floor in rage.

"where will I be? where do I go?" he yelled, watching you silently search the closet as you rip clothes out, tossing them to the bed.

When you dont respond, he grows more upset and desperate. "so fuck me then? right? because my feelings on this dont matter?" he cried, standing at the door and watching you. "please tell me what ive done, what ive said, to make you feel like you cant talk or confide in me? why is there no comfort between us? what the fuck happened?"

Tears freely fell as you aggressively threw your suitcase together, you heard his words sink into your blood, your own emotions tugging at your heart as you tried to convince yourself you were capable of making your own choices. "its not a break up, its just some time away from everything, I will come back" you spoke, teeth gritted.

"you are being so selfish y/n" he shook his head in disbelief, "why am I not enough to help? why cant we both go to your moms?"

"because im tired!!" you yell, throwing the shoes in your hands.

He laughed, eyes scanning over you "you are tired? from what? ....oh I get it, me giving you every limb I have, spending my time and money on you must be so exhausting. Im just the fucking worst huh? Jesus, y/n, you are acting like I fucking punched you" he spit

You glared at him, pinching your thigh as he referred to Kaito "Im tired of drama following me everywhere I go. I never fucking asked you to give me anything, ever, at all." you whisper, eyes sinking into his. "How dare you say that to me....." you grew angry at your voice wavering "this was a mistake"

His eyes widened, "a mistake..?"

"yeah..." you scoff "a mistake, clearly the biggest one ive made" you were quick to wipe your eyes. "we should have stayed just friends, you feeling forced to provide and love me just because of the baby is pathetic. You dont have to worry about it anymore anyways, asshole" you spit, turning around.

He felt like he had gotten stabbed in the chest, his breath leaving his lungs as you sat there and accused him of not only not loving you, but the child. "y/n, you know nothing...you have no idea what you are saying"

"oh but I do"

"you are angry, and thats why you said that, I really hope thats the case...because what you just accused me of...." his voice was tight and shallow. "how can you say I only stayed because of the baby....who, by the way, I was willing to give up everything for"

"you felt compelled to, you dont have to lie anymore"

His tears continued to fall, he was shocked at your words. "y/n I love you and that baby more than anything....why are you saying this?"

He regretted yelling, and perhaps he said words that dug deeper than he meant them too, however what you threw back at him was worse than any conversation prior.

"Yeah well I dont even know if the baby was yours or Kaitos so It literally doesnt matter" you threw clothes into your bag "its gone anyways" you sobbed, "so just go on and do whatever the fuck you were doing before I pulled you down with me, okay?"

Taehyung gasped softly, eyes widening as he watched you.

You knew it was wrong, you regretted saying it as soon as it left your mouth, but you couldn't go back on it, not anymore.

"you....you dont?"

You didnt reply, instead, picking the pace up as you gathered your things.

"baby....baby talk to me this isnt funny anymore" he ran over to you, desperately seeking your attention. "look....i...I dont care if it was mine or not, I wouldnt have treated them any differently, baby please listen to me, its okay"

"taehyung I have to go" you whispered

"no..please my love, why are you....what did I do? im sorry...im sorry" he grasped your hand and fell onto his knee

"stop" you choked out, looking at him with tears in your eyes. "listen...Its not forever, just give me some space....please"

"why...this is so...." he whispered, crying as he looked up at you, "please think this through. let me come with you-"

"taehyung....look at me, Im not breaking up with you, I just need space, and if you wont let me do that..." you shrug, "then what are we doing here?"

He looks down at his hands

"thank you, okay? thank you for giving me all of this, and Im sorry it didnt work out, but we need to have time away so we can come back stronger, okay?" you choked out before going back to what you were doing.

Taehyung at some point in the conversation gave up at trying to convince you to stay, he realized his words were no longer effective, and you were gonna walk away from him no matter what he said.

He felt your grip loosen, specifically within the past few weeks. You were slowly slipping away and he knew it, but he didnt want to think it was anything you two couldnt fix, he needed you just as much as you needed him.

He knew he would wait, and if you left and needed space, then he would let you do so.

"fine..." he whispered, feeling one hundred percent defeated as his eyes watched you gather your things. "w-when....are you leaving?"

you sniffed, "tomorrow morning"

"i'll go with you to the airport" he said quickly, making your grasp on your bag tighten.

"okay" you mumbled.

Its not that you didnt love Kim Taehyung, its that you loved him too much to be wrapped in this drama with him all the time. Things will be well for a while then something happens, something always happens, and its not fair.

to either of you.

You regretted saying the baby thing the moment it came out of your mouth, but you were always bad at dealing with emotions. After some time alone with your mom you would need to do some major damage control.

You only wanted 2 weeks alone, its not like you were leaving for 2 years, why was he being so stubborn about this?

It was a fairly quite car trip at 6am the next morning to the airport.

The grey clouds that toppled over you set the tone of the day for taehyung as he parked among the cars in the lot. The last time you two were at this airport was when you arrived here, hopes high for not only the trip, but a positive change in eachothers future.

one that never came.

he walked you inside all the way to your gate, watching as crowds of people gathered nearby.

"well...." he whispered, watching the way his feet scuffed the floor beneath him.

"well..." you repeated, turning to look at him. "its only a few weeks"

Taehyung nodded, repeating the extent in his brain like it would reassure him.

"we will come out of this as better people" you mumbled, reaching up to hug his tightly, hands finding the familiar pattern of running down his back, squeezing him.

"I hope" he exhaled, hugging you just as tight.

Once you pulled away, your faces close together, you looked into his eyes and took every ounce within you to avoid tearing up. Before bed last night, you both discussed the properties of this situation, and what exactly it would entail. You apologized for your words, as did he, and now here you both were at the end of the terminal waiting for your plane to be called so you can head back to korea without him.

"about the baby...." you whispered, looking at him

"I know...you dont have to apologize again. y/n, I dont care who's it was, I honestly dont. nothing would have led me away from you" he reassured, "I just want to make sure you will be okay on the flight"

You nod slowly, "i will be fine, moms picking me up when I land so..."

"good, thats good"

"yup, and i'll text you when im at home okay?" you spoke

"got it"

"you'll wait for me?"

"i'll wait for you" he whispered, kissing your forehead.

"even if im the most awful person?"

Tae laughed softly "you arent, but even if you were, yes"

You nod sadly, finally allowing the tears to spill as he immediately hugged you close to his chest again. its not a goodbye, its a "see you later", right?

"dont cry...this is what you wanted"

You pull back, wiping your eyes "yeah...yeah"

The speaker above your heads announced boarding for your plane. Grabbing the tickets from your bag, you looked at taehyung once more and smiled weakly, "i'll see you, okay?"

He smiled, nodding "i'll be there when you need me" please need me

You waved, quickly turning so he wouldn't see you crying again as you made your way down the tunnel, your body now hidden behind the herd of other passengers.

"love you" he whispered to himself, stuffing his hands into his pockets as he realized his current state, alone.

He hasnt been alone in months, and it provided a certain uncomfy feeling that ran through his body, almost disturbing. He knew he would be returning to the hotel and packing so he could visit his own mother and father back in Busan. Explaining that situation to them will be its own event.

How could something so sweet and beautiful always find its way to trash? to devastation? it was what you two thrived on, and perhaps time apart was needed after all.

He would wait for you

He would wait for your laugh, your eyes, the way you whispered, the way you nagged him over being messy, or how you fussed when he forgot to eat again.

But....how long exactly would he do so?

taglist-

@turnthepageandbeburnt @taebangtanbabe @borahaexoxo @lelefoodlover @tan-veee

#bts #bts fanfic #taehyung #kim taehyung #bts fluff #bts smut #kim taehyung fanfic #kim taehyung series #taehyung fanfic #taehyung smut

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khaleesiofalicante · 2 months

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tbh dani i dont give a fuck about the clave or alec or david or (th eone i never understood or care for) kincaid (like bro even gabriel killed his demon father all he had to do is out his dad or take a stance against him but he wants the damn glory and feels tied to his destone and no i am not willing to hear anything in support of this familywho somehow is still more powerful than lance), nor do i care about that bitch victoria( bc no matter her mental problems I HATE HER), or that asshole fucking hope he gets mauled kyle,

I only care about max and lance and david (and yes that is right i really dont give a shit about arthur either)

I think its obvious i am high on this chapter's feelings, idk i feel strongly for accountbaility where its due and revenge in general but esp for lance. Though i had hoped lance would burn idris or get revege by killing people , bc arthur got hurt i wasnt that mad like i was mad bc of teh reasoning behind it and bc i hate kyle but it was sort fo his fault did he think it wld be all lalala land if he goes to idris that littel shit anyways, BUT BUT GWEN ?!? DANI , wow wow i am speechless but in a mad kind of way. i dont accept this. nope no no no

how much is that family esp lance and david going to hurt, i just want a proper revenge for them at teh end, like people begging for thier/them for forgiveness sort of, i know they are never going to be apert of the shadowworld but i had hoped it alawys had shadow demons over them, i hate them that much

i also dont like that kincaid was so easily able to defeat lance and people celebrated it, I loved lance in this ch like wooo go off boy, and wow max being all powerfull and manipulating blood was sooooo cool, go be badass baby, also arthur should be grounded for a decade or so or even for life, i hated how kincaid downplayed lance and arthur relationship like idgaf whether arthur CHOSE you or not, lance is superior sorry kid.

I also HATED RAFE , but that is normal for me now, i havent liked him in lbaf for a long long while. i hope they lb family just cuts all of thier siblings and cousins off, like no contact and they fucking realize or feel how much that family suffered , like of wow you didnt have sun for 20 years big deal bro, there are places on earth which doeasnt have that for 6 mnths every year since eternity. they DESERVED THAT isaid what i said, i am just getting bored of rafe and his reasoning like oh NOW you decide to fight harder what does he want congratulations?!

the idris people and kincaid deserved the bad thinsg happening to them for me, like i feel it isnt enough, also madeline srsly you knew abt lance being david kid and possibly inheriting the demon blood, did you think it was a good idea to go to idris when pregnant with your husband like i think you vicariously consented to the liability and possibility of damage when you also knew david can do shadow demon shit.

so yeah i am beyond reason in this fic when it comes to hating idris and all living being there and only support lance and david and max ( yes i am deliberately leaving arthur his idiotic naviety that kincaid cares about him when it comes to him vs his own family or so called destiny he is irritating me , like sir he doesnt give a shit about what he said to you idk why he believed kincaid's promises.)

i just want someone to lecture them after locking them in a room preferably alec i have no hope for rafael in this fic he is beyond any hope for me and so is kincaid so

😘thank you for teh rollercoaster of the chapter bye. But i hope you give vengeance to lance and his family against idris. 👿

This was A RIDE lmao.

I love when y'all take it personally and get emotional (shows me I am doing my job 😎)

I can't promise you anything. But I can tell you that I believe in happy endings, but I don't think everyone gets one. A story where EVERYONE gets their happy ending doesn't make sense to me. Some people do and others do. As to who will get it and who won't is entirely up to (in this scenario, me lmao).

So we shall wait and see :)

#lbaf

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cogbreath · 2 months

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not a vent but it is a ramble of personal things but

im seriously so so like... shocked idk. i didnt expect this to happen. it seems like its really gonna happen. but im nervous. theres been times before where it was like. my mom was talking about how he might not be allowed 2 live here anymore and i was so hyped but then nothing came of it. i cant have that happen again. im 21 years old man. and i dont have a life because of the shit living arrangements we have going on bc of him. if hes really fed up and leaving this is gonnabe so fucking huge.......... like i said before i want his room so i can expand my waifu shrines 😈 ... lol. im being lighthearted. i seriously had 0 hope for a while. and idk. i once had a serious breakdown in front of my mom wherre i admitted that i felt like i was genuinely gonna end up killing him. and tbh i thought that there was a chance that ended up being the only way out. im really happy if this is true and im getting an actual happy ending for once. ive been. wanting this so desperately since i was a kid guys. seriously. i hate that man so much. hes a disgusting abusive asshole with 0 compassion + he m*lested me. hes got mad health problems that my mom manages for him and i wonder if shes worried about how he'll do on his own with that. personallly i dont care. i dont care. i want him out. i dont want my mama being his caregiver nomore. cruel cruel man. for all my life ive watched that man degrade her ans berate her and expect her to serve him afterwards ..... ive had to deal with overhearing him harassing her for never having sex with him.. which is something that was always extra painful for me because of my own sexual trauma.... theres honna be a lot of scary changes like my mom says i have to get a job again. im really not not good at working due to my disabilities. but i could hold a job for a year before i ended up losing it. it was very trauamtic. i dont want to work again. but i will be freed from the familial agony. its a lot guys. seriously. ive been so so so isolated and disconnected from eberything and everyone because of it for all my life. ive never been able to truly be a person because of it. it became my job to help my mother emotionally and mentally to degrees that no child really should havr to because she had no one else. i dont fault or resent her at all for that and im happy to defend her and help her and listen to her. its a lot though and especially when i was younger. also

ill probably do drugs less often because i wont be trying to drown out another fight theyre having.

im nervous because im a a psychotic autistic agoraphobic and i will have to be going outside now. but. i will be going outside now... which means having a life. my mom will be with me still. i will still live with her and probably will most my life because of my circumstances. but i love her. im okay with having to maybe do some scary things because of that. dude. theres a convention near me soon that i was hoping to go to. i kinda just had it as a pipe dream though. because basiclaly i have no ability or opportunities to leave the house. but now i will. im really hopping that this is rwal and i'll be able to go... its my goal. i want to make a misty monsoon cosplay. i really do. im crying rn bexause im just so excited to get a chance at things. trust me thougu im still gonna be a asocial shutin first and foremost. dont worry guys i wont be abandoning you. im a dedicated poster. but you know. im gonna be posting under better circumstances inshallah.

also this is a lot for me spiritually. my dad is heavily islamophobic and ive not been able to safely be open because of him. ive prayed and prayed a lot to allah to help make things to where i can finally do that. i really really feel like allah has given me a great gift here im so happy allahu akbar

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guiltycorp · 2 years

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@crimsongrimoire here: #okay honestly the last name part bugs me too#doesnt it STILL say on the wiki that a former alias was their last name#like what is your proof! cite your fucking sources!#literally somehow one of the worst wikis ive been interested in#so many sources of made up ass info are just like trust me bro#and the gross oversimplification of their dynakic#*dynamic jesus.#like idk you can prefer them platonically idgaf. just dont make shit up wholesale to sell a narrative that doesnt exist.#(...not to say klk enjoyers dont as well But. brother insisters are so much worse about it)#(so few genshin fans have reading comprehension at all fr)#its just such a mess. you can just Say you dont see them romantically. you wont die. i promise#no need to have 10 banners and 20 tags with posturing about how you want klk shippers to choke and die#when theres like Literally nothing Inherently Wrong with it#though people who say shit like 'yeah well it WOULD be hot if they WERE brothers so!'#you are not helping the cause#the 'making people mad on purpose for fun to make them look dumb' works so rarely and almost never over fandom nonsense#either way big agree op#fave#funnily this is the same kinda people who are all like AWWWW HIDDEN STRIFE WAS SWEET IT WASNT SAD AT ALL#and like completely misreading the tone of like All the letters esp those between kaeya and diluc#which is funny cause like Every post ive seen on the subject has been about Them and That part and how AWWW THEY KEPT I CONTACT?!?!#when.... the letters on both sides carry very palpable senses of tension from the wording and esp the brevity of dilucs#some very minor but painful details#and just in general all the letters in question like.. while it was nice diluc was getting support#it was in the WORST circumstance. its incredibly melancholy and bittersweet. like yes its nice to know everyone cares.#but also it was so avoidable. but also at the same time nobodys fault. even though both of them kick themselves for it#remembered my other point DILUC ONLY REPLIED TWICE. TO KAEYAS 9 LETTERS. THAT IS NOT KEEPING CONTACT!#there is no reason kaeya wouldnt have put any other letters from him with the others tbh unless theyre recent in which case#kinda irrelevant. thats not 'keeping contact' theyre in the same place now like Often.#ngl we have no indication if kaeya got those letters to him somehow or just left them for his return.

Literally like!! Genshin fandom has actually been one of the worse fandom experiences for me, and I think we can blame a lot of it on the game and its translation, but also it’s just so goddamn frustrating at times. That klc post was written before hidden strife but if anything the event further confirmed that their dynamic wasn’t ‘adopted siblings’ (despite eng translation as usual messing up everything including Kaeya’s opinion of their fight) and that Kaeya doesn’t view himself as a Ragnvindr.

An AU where Kaeya would have been fully adopted could be potentially interesting, actually! Ragbros AU if you will. But for some reason people never really go for all the implications of that - how strongly it would influence Kaeya’s internal conflict and his abandonment issues, how Diluc would change his treatment of Kaeya, how differently another Ragnvindr progeny would be viewed in Mondstadt, would he succeed the Dawn Winery’s business, so many possibilities... But no, they simply take canon klc dynamic and twist it, ignoring all the discrepancies which point to a non-familial relationship. That tag is just one more annoying attempt at censure within fandom spaces, familiar to anyone who ever interpreted fictional relationships as homoerotic before (how dare you tarnish this beautiful brotherly or sisterly bond by your sinful delusions etc etc yawn). And big agree about Hidden Strife letters, they still represent the usual dynamic as is the norm for all those temporary events. But fandom sadly tends to go for extreme interpretations, either the characters totally hate each other or they are secretly totally fine and getting along splendidly... I guess maybe people are getting tired of this kind of one-sided relationship, so they want some kind of resolution one way or another, but I kind of like the place Kaeya and Diluc are in right now. It would be nice to get some more Diluc POV just to confirm whether he cares in a detached way or in a barely suppressed passionate & deep way, and/or if perhaps he does carry some hateful feelings towards Kaeya, but otherwise it’s just a really good starting off point for creating fan content. Speaking only for myself, but it’s all the more bittersweet that there is a possibility that they won’t reconcile after all, that their paths might diverge, that their ideologies might already be irreconcilable without us knowing, that Diluc maybe doesn’t really care that much after all. With this in mind, positive outcomes such as reconciliation, a romantic relationship or a rekindling of friendship, are so much more impactful.

#especially since i dont trust genshin with writing khaenriah vs celestia in a compelling way #when they finally get to it #kaeluc #kaeya #diluc #genshin #is it weird to answer tags in this way?#probably #but that was an already long post #@crimsongrimoire #text

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dbzebra · 2 years

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Goten and Valese 😍

I dont love it, but I dont dislike it! most recent GT rewatch gave me a better appreciation for it

So quick context!

I'm a Goten fan first and foremost. (And despite what some haters may think about me, I'm pretty open minded.) Im just protective of Goten because fandom he's so ignored, and then is written super OOC when actually used in fics.

And Im also biased for MarTen, and that is like 99% of the reason why im not a big fan of it lol. Also as a kid I was mad Goten got left behind on earth cause he was on the phone with her so i as NO VALESE ITS YOUR FAULT lol.

But anyway, its honestly really sweet. Im so happy my boy found a cute gf, he deserves to be happy fr fr. Hes so sweet and gentle and nice to her, like how can fandom say this boy is the typical asshole fratboy cheater type? you mfs aint writing Goten ill tell you that much. Go write an OC. I also love how Valese just instantly accepts he has powers and likes him more for it.

tbh I wish we got more of them. More GT Goten in general but yeah lol

ValTen may not be my preferred ship for him, but it gets a pass from me. Good ship

#dragon ball #dragon ball gt #goten #son goten #valese #dbz #ship ask meme

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asunas-junk-drawer · 7 months

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September 19th

i had no idea what to wear today. i just went with a black tank top and jeans with sneakers. i dont really think it matched. but its okay. i was particularly insecure about my hair though. i was trying to cut it with scissors as of recent during lunchtime, but my friend astro was being a bitch and ripped away the scissors from me. even when i told her that i was just trying to cut off my split ends, since im insecure…

i did stand up for myself tho… i told her to give them back to me and she actually did do that. she did back off thankfully. im working on trying to get her to understand boundaries as well. also today, she saw that i was texting some weird guy who goes to our school (she literally looked over my shoulder just so she could see……,,,,..). then she went on a rant and went ‘stop texting him, block him’. but like the thing is that im literally a lesbian????? plus i know that hes weird (well call him fei. hes kind of a weirdo who has a hentai pfp for his instagram acc. plus astro says that he watched hentai during class….). but like all he does is send memes to me…! plus i don’t even like him, but im pretty sure that astro doesnt know that since i made a comment about him being kind of fine. i never clarified if i was being serious or not so I guess thats kind of my fault. but she just kept on saying that and stuff…. im thinking of dumping her but the problem is that shes apart of my friend group and has a lot more influence over it than I do (meaning that if i do that, then i might get kicked out of it………). which is bad since i dont have any friends at school other than them, and i wouldnt say that im close with them tbh…….

when i came home, my siblings and parents weren’t there. i did things as normal, but i wanted to go into my old room (my grandma, who is visiting from mexico, is using my room right now, which means that I’m forced to sleep in the living room and have all my clothes in some spare room that we have….) so that i could search for some dresses for homecoming. while searching, i decided to get some heels that were inside of this little box. my grandma had some of her stuff on top of it, and I had to move it away to actually get to the shoes. Underneath the stuff, was fifty solid dollars. i stole it. It’s justified though because my grandma is a total bitch. i won’t go into too much detail, but she basically wants my dad to go back to mexico with her so that he can take care of her or something idk…. to reach this goal of hers, shes been trying to make my parents fight, so then she could get into my dads head and convince him to go back with her. She’s tried doing this once before.

when my parents got back home, my mom told me about stuff that happened with my grandma. She told me that while they were at the self checkout aisle for Walmart, that she forgot to scan a couple of items and technically stole from the store because my mom was distracted from my grandmas rambling. my mom got mad at my grandma because she didn’t like a doll that my mom picked out for my baby sister (the doll had a darker skin color). Basically my grandma was being colorist and kept saying that it was ugly just because of that…. (My mom literally has darker skin while my grandmother is racially white, but ethnically mexican). So yeahhh….

i don’t regret stealing those fifty dollars. My grandma is blind anyway…. It’s not like she’d notice lol

Listen to this. it’s a good song.

#asuna #Spotify

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3dayweeknd · 1 year

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men do not care about respecting anyone’s boundaries (aka my father)

tbh i might be overreacting but also maybe not because boundaries

ok likee. my dad is very physically affectionate which is like whatever its not his fault and i know he misses me when im not home i just. need some space bro. like hugs are whatever if u ask but like. the other day i was eating dinner and he came and sat next to me but the problem wasnt the sitting net to me its that he put his plate like literally in my space like imagine if there was imaginary lines for everyone for like where your own plates and stuff go like im saying he put it in my space and then scooted like right next to me and faced towards me and talked into the side of my face and like all i asked was can i have some space and he was so fucking offended like actually taken aback. its not even the first time i expressed that i needed space. and immediately he was like “no”. what the fuck do you mean “no” you’re going to violate my boundaries and invade my personal space out of spite because i hurt your feelings by having boundaries and by not wanting you breathing down my neck??? i wasnt even like mean about it i just wanted to eat in peace. that actually made me mad because if youre saying u just miss me and want to be near me but dont respect my own boundaries then you dont really give a fuck about what i think and what i want then. this is all about you then and you only care what YOU want. its actually baffling the audacity of men. and then today all 4 of us went to church and nobody wanted to sit next time him but he always manspreads into our space so they made me sit next to him. and he wanted to hold my hand which im usually fine with but today i just really didnt want to and i kept like NOT holding his hand and then he literally picked up my sleeve to move my arm into his space. wtf. and i tried not to let him sit on literally the same chair as i was on and i put my purse between us and spread my feet and he crossed his legs into my space and his shoe was literally on me. and like i KNOW he’s getting the signal but he doesnt give a fuck. and then i put my hands in my pocket and then he just started rubbing me knee. I literally fucking cant like when i get irritated my senses are heightened/sensitive and any sort of touching like that makes me so fucking mad. and then when we were standing my hands were still in my pockets and he put his OWN HAND INTO MY POCKET. like ACTUALLY what the fuck. and then he held my arm in between his hands so i couldnt even move like i was itchy and i couldnt move to get it. he literally knows i dont want to be touched he just doesnt fucking care and then whenever i verbalize it hes all butthurt like im deliberately not allowing it to hurt him. ITS NOT ABOUT YOU ITS LITERALLY NOT ABOUT U

#vent

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rosieselfships · 1 year

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can selfships be classified as "problematic?" i'm worried because i self ship with a character i have a very large age gap with (them being the older one) and i'm scared that if i'm public about this antis might harass me.

alright so im gonna put this under the cut bc i rambled on for too long and its a bit discourse-y.

...sometimes antis call certain selfships problematic while they dont for others that should be just as "problematic". Some antis have no problems with people selfshipping with villains, slashers, etc. But will get mad when people selfship with characters who have done things they personally can't excuse like rapists or abusers, or selfships with age gaps especially if they are younger...or even just selfshiping with a character people think are gay even if its not canon (its still dumb even if it is canon cuz like 1 persons selfship isnt gonna take away representation guys).

I'd like to say that selfshipping with an older character shouldn't be an issue however some people have no common sense and are hypocrites and think that an adult consensually dating an older adult is pedophilia. And this isn't just a hypothetical either, i follow this one selfshipper who is in their 20s who selfships with a character in their late 40s, and i've seen them get called a pedophile even when no child is involved and the character is literally older than them...they either must be mistaken or just tossing out serious words and watering down the meaning of them.

Of course, if anyone says this to you or anyone else in a situation like this, just know that it is completely dumb and you are not at fault.

My suggestion would be to make a new side blog for your selfship stuff. In 2018 i had an old selfshipping blog but it became inactive due to seeing antis in the community and just embarrassment in selfshipping in general. It wasn't until last year when i got the urge to post about selfshipping again after following some proship selfshippers, then i made this blog and started over. You could start new and make it clear that you don't want antis to interact with you. Block anyone who sends you harassment and turn off anons if you need to. I'm not so open about being proship outside of this side blog tbh, but only because the community is full of antis and i just wanted to avoid them and curate my own experience. There are a lot of things i would say if i didnt feel i would be harassed or loose friends/mutuals over it...and i just dont really like to discourse anyway...except for in private with people i know share similar opinions with me and we all bitch about some dumb take we see online. Having friends or people you follow share similar opinions and beliefs can make you feel less alone.

...honestly..ive had this blog for a year and im at 100+ followers and ive had anons on for a long time, im actually surprised i havent received hate yet...while recent-ish i got a random anon on my main blog that just said "kys". I have no idea what prompted that response...it took me 5 years on this account for me to get hate xd. maybe i am just low profile, or people think they cant get a reaction out of me so they dont bother me, or both.

#discourse

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abcdosaka · 1 year

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1. got covid thanks to my roommate. ik its not really her fault bc none of us were being careful and honestly we don’t care that much but fuck i’m still pissed off

2. started my period yesterday

3. suffering so much anxiety for fucking weeks on end bc of my driving test, it was supposed to be on monday and i just wanted to get it over with but now i can’t. nvm maybe i just wont fucking do it this term irdgaf at this point im so fucking frustrated and i need to focus on schoolwork

4. its my birthday tomorrow which is always fucking miserable and i hate it bc i feel like nobody cares but especially this year. i feel like my family is mad at me bc i came home last night despite feeling unwell (i tested negative in the morning so i thought it was just period symptoms making me feel unwell) and now my dad has symptoms

5. i honestly think nobody is all that concerned about me. bc im not particularly concerned about other ppl. just my family and i can’t ever be honest with them bc im stupidly choosing to be gay.

wait that was a dumb thing to say like come on now lol

yeah it kinda sucks but honestly fuck everyone except for s and n. i called them both recently honestly i feel like they’re my only really true friends at this point even though they are both going thru it they’ll support me if i just ask. in fact n was the one who called me. its better if i just accept what sucks and try to be grateful for what i do have.

fuck e, m, j, e, s, my other roommates, everyone else. i dont really mean that but also fuck em lol.

ok to be quite fair i overheard e talking in class yesterday and her car literally got broken into... ugh my feelings towards her as a friend are just so bitter and annoyed even tho i like her (as a friend) so much. it seems like shes getting a lot of support tho and we barely talk these days so idk what to say tbh.

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colonel-insomniac · 3 years

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Wait

@my-blood-is-maple-syrup @pawsomelybuggy ive done it again, don’t be mad at me though :D. potential sorry in advance for what im about to do. OH listen to this playlist but only if you want

After landing on earth, Kai and Pon were instantaneously dazzled by the dizzying brightness. It was such a stark difference to the darkness of Azurelle that for a moment, everything seemed perfectly balanced, like a piece of glass saved from teetering off the edge of a table.

But of course, as is the case, glass fragments and shatters. Ezra fell to the dirt, gasping for air, though he couldn’t be choking, because he wasn’t eating anything. He wrapped his hands around his neck, trying to convey his need for help. Kai didn’t realize at first, his mind dark and empty in response to the dazzling light, blinded by the beauty of it all.

He turned his head at the continued sound of coughing, dropping to his knees when the situation registered. Pon had been kneeling by Ezra’s side, trying to help the boy, and Kai checked for breath exiting Ezra’s body, trying to narrow down what might be happening as he tried to push the rising panic and fear down, if only for Ezra’s sake. Unfortunately, no air was entering or exiting from Ezra, and Kai looked at Pon, frozen with horror. With Ezra rapidly turning a pale blue-purple shade, Pon began attempting to physically insert air into the other boy’s body through mouth-to-mouth resuscitation methods.

Kai thinks it works for a bit, but doesn’t know how to contact emergency services. Does Earth have emergency services?

Abandoning all care, he pats down Ezra in case he happens to have a phone on him, and thankfully finds one, which he flashes to Ezra, who grabs his hand and traces the following numbers: nine, one, and one. Kai dials and is bombarded with questions that he does his best to answer, eventually giving up when they ask for his location, opting to ask if they can instead trace the call, as he isn’t too sure of where he is at the moment.

The lady on the other end of the line asks for him to stay on the line, and after a couple minutes tells him an ambulance, police officer, and fire truck being sent over. Kai pleads with them to hurry, unable to hide the fear in his voice anymore.

It seems they’re too late, though. By the time the medics arrive, Pon has reported the worst news that Kai thinks he could ever hear. There’s no breath, no pulse.

Kai felt that his own breath and pulse were completely gone, his world shattered. It feels like it doesn’t matter whether he were on Azurelle or on Earth. What was the point of life if your lover was dead, taken by some unknown force? He found himself unable to convey the overwhelming sorrow, eyes dry and mouth glued shut.

Kai watched as the medics loaded Ezra into an ambulance and had to be dragged by Pon to said vehicle. He felt stuck, like he would forever be rooted to this very spot, his heart shattered.

But later, it seems all is not necessarily lost, because somehow the doctor’s are able to locate the faintest of heartbeats with their fancy medical technology, and Kai desperately holds on to that sliver of hope. They are not allowed to visit Ezra, his condition to unstable and unique that they must put him in an intensive care unit to closely monitor him. Without any reason to be there, Pon throws an arm around Kai in nearly matched misery, and guides a still numb Kai out of said care facility, despite a nurse calling attention to Kai’s various wounds.

He genuinely had forgotten about that, had been too consumed that his brain allowed him to bypass the cruel pain that was gradually settling back into his bones. Kai thought of both nothing and everything, his mind searching for answers, because something told him that Ezra wasn’t choking because of some typical medical thing. All he could think of was what if they had done something wrong, and Ezra was still somehow tethered to Azurelle? What if this was the Azurellian government metaphorically pulling the leash, reminding Pon and Kai that they won’t ever escape, not when they have this venomous grip on Ezra.

The pair slowly make their way back to the spot they had landed on, now filled with memories of horrific events that had just taken place. Looking off into the distance, Kai can just barely make out a trail, for some reason, before the war, Ezra had wandered off the beaten path and ventured into raw nature instead.

There had to be something poetic about that, but Kai’s mind didn’t have the capacity to consider that at the moment, still could barely form a coherent thought. The pair make their way back to the path, and looked both ways. One side led further into the forest, further into a mystery promising adventure, and the other back to society. They go back to society, not willing to embark on another journey after the hurt had still been so fresh.

Kai kept a firm hold on Pon’s hand the whole time, fearing that the moment he let go, his best friend would disappear too. As they approach the cross section between nature and society, a couple that looks oddly familiar run up to the two boys.

The woman, her voice watery asks if either of them have seen a boy “...named Ezra Watts.” A thousand memories flash in Kai’s mind in less than a second. “It’s hard to explain,” The man adds, “but he was supposed to be back today and we aren’t sure what’s happening.” Kai looks wide and watery eyed at Pon, who thinks for a moment, not sure how to order his words.

“This is going to seem crazy, but we know your son. The rest would be easier if we were away from prying eyes and ears.” The man who Kai now assumes to be Ezra’s father nods, and wraps an arm around his wife, gesturing for Kai and Pon to follow.

They have a nice house. That’s all Kai can get through his brain, which is a slight improvement, tracing patterns on the couch he’s currently sitting on. He lets Pon do most of the explaining, but can’t miss the curious glances at him.

“...from Azurelle,” He picks up on the spark of fear at the name of their home planet. “I’m Pon, and this is Kai. We managed to escape, but only thanks to the kindness of your son. He saw something in us that convinced him to help us out. If he hadn’t, execution is what we would have faced.” Pon places his hands in his lap, fiddling with the hem of his shirt.

They nod, but look over to Kai, because the look of distraught that has been etched onto his face is a tad bit more concerning to them. Something more is going on there and he knows they know. Pon places a hand on Kai’s shoulder, “Kai and your son, they—well, that is to say that they mutually appreciate each other in the way that you guys do.” Pon then nods, happy with being able to dance around outright saying it, and despite his negative emotions, Kai can’t help snorting at his friend’s ridiculousness.

Ezra’s mom blankly regards Kai, before nodding and smiling at him, and Kai can feel the heat rise in his cheeks. With a shaky breath, Kai opens his mouth, knowing that if he loves Ezra, he has to say something. “When we arrived here, your son began choking, we don’t know exactly why that happened, but we managed to get hiim to a hospital, and they put him in this thing called an intensive care unit. They found he was still alive so they’re monitoring him right now.” Kai inspects his hands, eyes stinging.

The mom nods, standing and offering a hand that Kai takes. The dad gestures for Pon to follow, and remains seated himself, face sad and staring out a window into a sunny lawn. She opens a door, leading to a bedroom that’s decorated with foreign posters and objects. Kai realizes at once that this has to be Ezra’s room, and presses his hands to his face. Ezra’s mom tells them to take as long as they need before backing out and leaving them. Kai glances around the room, landing on the bed, with a blanket patterned with some sports ball.

There’s a childlike air to his room, a messiness that comes from never resting and being in a rush. There’s a small squeak, and Kai finds Pon opening Ezra’s closet doors, peering at the different items stored within. He hesitantly walks over, fingers catching on a soft cotton material. He pulls it off its hanger and finds it to be a hoodie. He glances at Pon, cheeks burning when Pon smiles and nods, sliding the garment on.

At once, he’s overwhelmed with the scent of Ezra, and he stumbles over to the bed, head in his hands and just cries. All this buildup, but it feels so good to let it all out, and Kai knows he needs to let himself just feel this pain and anger and sorrow. Pon sits beside him and hugs Kai, doesn’t move until Kai wipes his eyes and hugs his friend back.

When he’s ready, they leave the room, Kai still wearing Ezra’s hoodie, and join Ezra’s parents, who don’t comment on the apparel change or his puffy eyes. They do, however, express a desire to see their son, even through glass windows, so they pile up in a car and drive around until Pon points out the building they had gone to.

The doctor’s deliver a grim prognosis: there’s hope for Ezra, but due to the amount of time without oxygen, he’s in a coma. They aren’t too sure when—or if —he’ll wake up, or what his brain activity would look like.

Exhausted and out of tears, Kai puts a shaky hand on the window, the cool glass serving as the barrier between them. Ezra’s mom cries quietly, turned with her face pressed into her husband’s shoulder. Pon’s quiet, as he typically is during times of grief and sorrow, and with his other hand, Kai grabs a hold of Pon’s hand.

A month goes by, and Ezra still hasn’t woken, doctor’s determined to not give up on him. Kai visits every day, walking to the hospital on his own sometimes, and always asks for any updates from the doctor’s. They’ve begun to give him cookies when he visits, silently fearing that he isn’t eating. Which he is, but his appetite isn’t really there.

But soon after that one month mark, Ezra has stabilized enough to be let out of the ICU, where they let Kai in to visit him. After a while the receptionist stops asking for information and lets him find his way to Ezra, for which he’s grateful. When he’s alone in the room with Ezra, he can almost pretend the wires aren’t there and their in a home all their own, with Pon, of course.

And he just talks. About anything and everything. He discusses his found love for classical music, specifically a composer named Bach, he talks about the weather, he tells him how much he misses Ezra, how much he wishes that Ezra were awake so he could say all the things he didn’t realize he should have said back on Azurelle.

Another two months pass, with Kai still visiting, Ezra still improving but not responsive. He still talks, or sits in silence, holding Ezra’s hand, sometimes places it against his cheek to feel the miniscule warmth. Today he just sits, nervous for some reason, his fingers at first fussing with the hem of his own shirt before moving to frantically comb through Ezra’s hair in an attempt to comb through it. It’s gotten longer than it had been when he first arrived on Azurelle, and something tells Kai that Ezra wouldn’t like it like that. Not that it’s extremely long or anything, but it’s something that he just feels within his heart of hearts.

He misses the furrowing of Ezra’s brows, overtaken by an urge to do something. But when Ezra moves his head, Kai freezes, his eyes widening as he looks down at Ezra’s face. He holds his breath, heart beating frantically with hope. And then Ezra opens his eyes, looking slightly confused before turning his gaze to look at Kai, who’s pressing the button he was told to push if—when— Ezra woke up. Two nurses walk in, and after a minute of poking, prodding, and taking notes, they finally begin to remove the breathing tube. Ezra never takes his eyes off Kai, swimming with an unreadable emotion. He briefly looks away when the nurses ask him questions to assess any brain damage, but shortly after, the nurses leave, reminding the two boys they’re just outside, one of them intending to let Ezra’s parents—and by proxy, Pon— know.

Ezra slides his gaze back to Kai, squinting as though he were thinking hard about something. After a moment, he whispers “Kai?”

The shorter boy nods, and throws his arms around Ezra, sobbing with relief. Ezra pats his back, returning the embrace. “What happened?” He asks after a moment. Kai pulls away but doesn’t let go of Ezra.

“When we got to Earth, you began to...choke, and we couldn’t figure out why or how to help, and you lost consciousness. I thought— you... it’s been three months and I’ve been so scared.” Ezra looks away, something like fear floating in his eyes. But he shakes his head and when he looks back to Kai, any sign of that is gone.

“So, Bach? Not a Mozart fan?” Kai’s mouth falls open, and he’s not sure what Ezra’s getting at, at first.

Then everything clicks when Ezra laughs at Kai’s stunned face. “Are you seriously talking to me about music right now?” Ezra shrugs in response.

Kai can’t help feeling overwhelmed, so he blames what happens next solely on that. He places his hands one either side of Ezra’s face and closes his eyes, pressing his mouth to Ezra’s. His stomach churns in fear of being rejected, but then Ezra pushes back slightly, and Kai relaxes, his hands still on Ezra’s cheeks.

When they pull away, Ezra’s quiet for a moment, looking closely at Kai’s red face. “Honestly,” he begins, “I have been wanting that to happen for a while now.” And Kai snorts, resisting the urge to be sarcastic.

Not knowing when to stop, Ezra adds “Who knew it took me almost dying for that to happen.” And abandoning his morals, Kai slaps his arm, not lightly, but not hard.

“You need to shut up.” Is all he responds with, grabbing Ezra’s hand, placing it on his cheek. Outside, the sun glows golden, as though she is positively pleased, and Kai has to agree with her.

#the other planet #pon #kai #ezra #for once ezra's parents #:D #oops #dont be mad at me its really not my fault tbh

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