#does it hurt more or less knowing that was sean - really sean - with them there in those final moments before it all went wrong

[heckblade]

to this very day I wish I had the money to commission an artist to draw the picture that nathaniel took of the circle of needle & thread on the elevator down into the fourth pharos

marion’s little thumbs up. the grin on sean’s face as they descend slowly towards the inevitable. god.

#for posterity. oof #how long does it take nathaniel to develop that photo #how often does he look at it afterward #does it hurt more or less knowing that was sean - really sean - with them there in those final moments before it all went wrong #smiling like he didn’t have a care in the world #I think about that picture like three times a week at least #candela obscura #circle of needle and thread #nathaniel trapp #beatrix monroe #sean finnerty #jinnah basar #marion collodi

[blazefirefox]

BEHOLD, MORE ENA OCS

I was rewatching the Dream BBQ announcement trailer when I noticed one of the spinning ENAs had the exact same colors as ThEna, just swapped, so I got the idea of making ENA OCs based on the other ENAs seen.

Here are my first three, the spooky siblings (based on color scheme), Enette, Enalise, and RegEna (left to right). I created GEna to complete the trifecta lol

Individuals + their "serial numbers"

Extra Info:

This group of sibs work with the ENA seen in Dream BBQ, under Froggy. They're pretty much the closest things she has to friends in her workplace, and they enjoy her company (GEna doesn't show it much tho)

Enatte (ENA-8532-01):

Orange - Efficient; the oldest ENA of any batch is expected to excel and be an example for their sibs, but this was driven into 01 more, as her batch was the first completely functional trio of ENAs that were created for a while. Unlike her sisters, 01 fully enjoys her job, even respecting Froggy a great amount. Her voice headcannon is Ben Balmaceda (specifically Kaveh from Genshin Impact, mostly just Ben himself).

Saffron - Mischievous; after years of conditioning to be a golden example for all Worker ENAs, her desires to be free and do what she enjoys culminated in her troublemaker side, which 01 does a good job repressing until she's off from work. The most important thing her siblings know about this side is that she usually goes along with what shenanigans they do. Her voice headcannon is Brianna Knickerbocker (specifically Hu Tao from Genshin Impact).

RegEna [GEna] (ENA-8532-02)

Purple - Haughty; she loves her older sister, she really does. But 02 hates how seriously she expects them to take this stupid job. Before they matured, 02 was known for her mean streak, often taking out her frustrations of the world on younger ENAs that were unfortunate to come her way. It wasn't until she accidentally hurt her younger sister that she started calming down. Now, she just a normal asshole. Her voice headcannon is Ryan Sean O’Donohue (specifically Demyx from Kingdom Hearts).

Orange - Guilty; when the sibs were assigned to work under Froggy, 02's siblings noticed that her other side became more downcast and self-deprecating, bursting into tears and continually apologizing for how she acts when her dominant side is in control, especially to 03. The youngest ENA in question does not know how to feel about this. Her voice headcannon is Erica Mendez (specifically White Lily Cookie from Cookie Run: Kingdom).

Enalise [Lisa] (ENA-8532-03)

Saffron - Thoughtful; unlike her older sisters, who either love or detest their job, 03 usually doesn't pay any mind to it, and does an average job. She actually is drawn to the oddness of the world around her, what secrets they hold, why things work like they do. She can't help but feel envious of Scholar ENAs since they have the access and knowledge 03 so desperately wants. Her voice headcannon is Khoi Dao (specifically Albedo from Genshin Impact).

Purple - Judgemental; experiencing 02's behavior before their full maturity shaped 03's annoyance into a need to reprimand everything she does and to communicate what 02's problem is in her own way, thus her snappy, but kind of well-meaning side. 03 is less shameful of this side than others think she should be, as the youngest ENA believes that "she was made the way she was, and she's going to let what emotions slip through happen." Her voice headcannon is Brittney Karbowski (specifically Mio from Ghost Stories Dub).

Next is Enaline, based on the ENA in the second picture on the right!

Alt. Outfit + her old Worker look

Extra Info:

Created as a Worker ENA, Enaline would become a Runaway after her other sibs went "missing under mysterious circumstances" and she "saw something she shouldn't have", as she puts it. Not much is known about her past other than this, as she soon becomes unresponsive after giving up too much information. She's mostly seen hanging out in the Karaoke Bar AthEna (ThEna) works at, and is very social, depending on which side is dominant.

Enaline (ENA-7450-03)

Sky Blue - Carefree; after experiencing The Horrors™, Enaline decides that she won't let her past and regrets tie her down, so she up and leaves the Sector she grew up in and ended up settling in the area overseen by The Clown. She is very jovial in this state, being more of an 'act first think about the consequences later' kind of ENA. Her voice headcannon is Kieran Regan (specifically Shikanoin Heizou from Genshin Impact).

Salmon - Existential; despite her attempts, Enaline can never fully leave behind the cause of her upturned life, and when she thinks about that, she becomes unpleasant (at least that's what she thinks). The former Worker feels a constant dread tugging at her in this state, something she can't remedy no matter what she does. All Enaline can do is not think about all of that while she's Carefree, and everything will be fine! Her voice headcannon is Monica Rial (specifically Momoko Koigakubo from Ghost Stories Dub).

@anniewuubelike 👀👀👀

#im finished help #ena joel g #dream bbq #ena ocs #ENA-8532-01 #Enatte #ENA-8532-02 #Enalise #ENA-8532-03 #RegEna #ENA-7450-03 #Enaline #ENA-8559-02 #AthEna #ThEna #please read this it took me 2 days to type #tbh I was making the lore up as I go so sorry if it's cringe #it'll 104% be wrong by the time dream bbq comes out but let me have this #art #i have another ena oc that has a concept im really excited to make #hopefully I don't forget about her lol #I originally made these 4 for the laughs but now im attached to them damn #trivia! many workplaces have a strict hair code for ENAs #and enatte is really pushing it with her weird hair things lol #enatte the worker #regena the worker #enaline the worker #athena the worker

[slicedmayonnaise]

Dutch was NOT always bad.

a lot of people overlook the fact of how much pressure dutch was under 24/7. for ~20 years, he had the burden of taking care of those around him and it only got worse as time went on and more and more people joined the gang. whenever something happened, good or bad, everyone looked to him to place blame because he was the one in charge.

i believe the first cracks started after colm killed annabelle. she was his responsibility; therefore, her death was his fault.

he was able to continue on normally until blackwater.

he lost davey, jenny, mac, and sean in blackwater. two dead and two mia and that blame is put on him. it is his fault that those four people are lost. it is his fault that his family is dead and hurting. then, when he gets sean back, he finds out mac is dead.

then arthur gets kidnapped by colm on a set up to discuss peace between the two gangs. arthur is shot and tortured. he's barely conscious when he makes it back to camp. dutch's fault. if only he'd realized. if only he'd taken arthur's absence more seriously. the pain in his voice when arthur tells him colm set them up.

then he loses sean again in rhodes. again, it is his fault sean dies. he is the leader. he is responsible.

then jack is kidnapped.

then kieran is captured and killed, whom dutch still feels responsible for despite the circumstances of how kieran came about. he clearly expresses sympathy for kieran's death.

then, of course, he loses hosea, lenny, and john during the saint denis bank robbery.

hosea's death itself is what finally breaks dutch. during the entire sequence in the bank, dutch does not move or fire his gun. he has to get arthur to blow open the wall because he is in shock. he can't even bring himself to move when he sees john get taken by the pinkertons.

everything went so wrong so quickly over the past few months and everything was dutch's fault.

the deaths of the two people he loved more than anything- annabelle and hosea- were his fault.

even when it's just dutch, bill, micah, arthur, and javier in guarma, dutch can't help javier when he gets shot and taken by the guarma officers.

at this point, he's lost his patience with himself and the world. he can't stand to see another of his boys die because of him. so he goes to immoral lengths to ensure he saves javier (killing that old lady in the cave).

nothing and no one else matters to him but his gang anymore. he has to keep them safe. so when micah gets in his ear about a rat and throws john under the bus to save his own skin, dutch can't help but go along with it in his fragile state because circumstantially, it does make sense. john was the only one who was taken alive at the bank, and his wife somehow managed to get away when hosea was grabbed by the pinkertons.

i don't believe dutch really would have let john hang in sisika. i do believe he had a plan to go for him eventually, but after john's return, he only got more and more antsy. he lost his mind more and more and trusted john and arthur less and less because of all the shit micah was feeding him. arthur did go behind dutch's back, after all.

"i gave you all i had" is the statement that makes dutch realize how much of a damn fool he's been. arthur- his son- laying at his feet and dying, once again, because of HIM. it's his fault that the gang fell apart. it's his fault that arthur is dying. it's his fault that john- his other son- is suffering. he was the one that betrayed the gang, and he recognizes it. he abandons micah on the mountain and breaks down crying over his own failure.

annabelle, davey, jenny, mac, sean, jack, kieran, john, hosea, lenny, molly, susan, arthur. all his fault. everything was his fault.

i doubt dutch stayed with bill and javier after beaver hallow. i believe he left out of shame. shame of what he'd become. shame of what he'd done.

i don't know why or how he ended up working with micah again by 1907, but my best guess has to do with that fact that he has completely lost his mind at this point.

well, not completely, as he does shoot micah for bad-mouthing arthur, and he does let john live.

john. his son. his last son. john misses dutch. dutch misses john. but john is too hurt. and dutch is too ashamed. dutch leaves, and he leaves john with the fortune he and micah had stashed away.

shame. guilt. all his fault.

#red dead redemption 2 #rdr2 #red dead fandom #red dead redemption #red dead redemption community #rdr #red dead redemption two #red dead #rdr1 #rdr 1 #rdr 2 #red dead 2 #john marston #dutch van der linde #hosea matthews #arthur morgan

[ivorybled]

╰ ┈ [ sean teale , twenty six , cis man , he/him ] in the time of dragons , ARTHUR HIGHTOWER is entering the game of thrones . said to be intuitive + eloquent , we can only hope that is the case as regrettably they are also well known to be calculating + opportunistic . when asked about them , people are always reminded of numerous stacks of books littered throughout a room , satisfaction always barely out of reach , the cold startling touch of a steel sword's hilt . though they are the LORD OF OLDTOWN , their true loyalties lie with house hightower and rumour has it that if given the choice they would support THE PEACE TREATY / THEIR FAMILY above all else . those of us in the shadows wish them luck and can only hope they will survive what is to come .

i.

full name : arthur hightower .

also known as : art .

official title : lord of oldtown .

age : twenty six .

gender + pronouns : cis man + he/him .

orientation : homosexual .

relationship status : unwed , unbetrothed .

allegiance : house hightower .

ii.

faceclaim : sean teale .

eye color : brown .

hair color : brown .

dominant hand : left .

height : 6'1"

build : athletic .

iii.

weapon of choice : usually has a sword on his hip but good with his hands for self defense .

moral alignment : true neutral ( for the time being at least ) .

inspired by : bronn & tyrion lannister ( got ) , eleanor shellstrop ( the good place ) , wesley wyndam pryce ( buffy / mostly from angel ) , orlo ( the great ) .

pets : doesn't have any :(

iv.

arthur has always been one to prefer the shadows to the spotlight , keeping himself and his circle of companions small . he lost his mother at a young age and though a part of him desired so badly to look up to his father , his judgement over the years drained hope of that away . instead , arthur found safety in his siblings and they became the people he trusted most . they've never been the most peaceful family and their connection is complicated , but even in present time , arthur still wishes all the best for them both .

though being the middle child let him have more freedom and less responsibility growing up , there were still expectations . to marry , to carry on the family name , everything that would help their house prosper . in many ways , art still wants that , but he grew out of living for others in his late teens . he doesn't really care what happens to house hightower tbh but like , he wouldn't do anything to hurt them , you know ? his sisters are cool but his dad can go to hell . also , marriage seems kinda ... dull to him ... he's not looking for anything serious .

he reads a lot , always wanting to know as much information as possible because he's nosy and also thinks it'll benefit him eventually . enjoys nerd things like battle strategies and mapping the stars . has a lot going on in his brain at all times but he's a bit quiet , doesn't really say much unless you initiate conversation . get him started on his interests , though , you might never get him to shut up . he's always trying to be the smartest person in the room .

likes to travel a lot ( his father hates it but he does it anyway ) , has a lute that he strums when he's alone , and is convinced horses hate him because he's been thrown off them three times now . he's very displeased about it . doesn't like violence but loves to sword fight and can defend himself if needed . he's just here to quietly have a good time .

v. - wanted.

pen pals - people art met while on his travels who kept in touch ! could be various people , he likes hearing about other people's stories so if you tell good ones then you'd be a good fit .

past suitors - arthur has zero interest in marriage and would not be subtle about letting someone down if they were interested in a betrothal ... especially women because he has no interest in them either .

scheming buds - this would have to be someone who is more of the devil on arthur's shoulder , since he has no issue doing what needs to be done to achieve his goals , but he is not someone who starts things . he's a loyal follower as long as the loyalty is mutual .

anything really !

#thrones.intro

[daylightcommand3]

Kelly Hu, Eric Bauza, and Christian Lanz all reprise their roles as Karai, Tiger Claw, and Fishface respectively. Both Tiger Claw and Fishface sound straight out of the show. (Though it is weird that Tiger Claw refers to us as “green guys”). Karai sounds a bit off, but it is undeniably her. I may also just need to hear her voice in the game more as her boss fight was (as I feared) incredibly easy, so i didn’t get to hear her much.

Clancy Brown did not reprise his role as Rahzar. Instead, Fred Tatasciore provides the voice. Much like Arif Kinchen with Bebop, Tatasciore does a good job of capturing the spirit of the character, though it very clearly isn’t the original voice.

Tatasciore also “voices” The Creep. Granted, it’s just a bunch of incomprehensible mumbling. I really don’t like this as a bunch of The Creep’s appeal is how silent they were. Though I guess maybe this was a way to make him less… creepy I suppose.

Kevin Micheal Richardson returns to provide some lines for Super Shredder. Fantastic job as always.

Seth Green, Sean Astin, Rob Paulsen, and Greg Cipes all reprise their roles as the titular Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. All of them do a great job bringing back the 2012 turtles.

Except with Mikey. For whatever reason, Mikey sounds off often. I don’t know if Greg Cipes had like a different direction, or he was just phoning it in, or the game lied and just got some random dude in. But when getting hurt, Mikey doesn’t sound right. I’ve watched 5 seasons of the show. I know what Mikey sounds like when he gets hurt, and that is not it.

Regardless, amazing voice work from all. Brought me right back to 2012-2017.

#tmnt #tmnt 2012 #wrath of the mutants

[7-oh-ta1]

Oh yeah I never said how I felt abt lis2 as a whole rather than just the ending I got. Yeah 7/10 had pacing issues due to the episodic release structure and lost itself a bit but pulled back together for the final confrontation and I was moderately satisfied with the ending considering they probably just wanted to be done with it since it didn't take off like the first game lmao. Sad bit is that I don't understand why it didn't!! I enjoyed it a lot more than the first by a longshot, probably because even tho it edged on corny with its attempts to show it's themes it also was more than a coming of age story with a not like other girls protagonist bec I was a big reader when I was younger and I've read 10 different stories like it, this one is just has indie music

---

Lis2 had it's fair share of weird attempts at making a statement but falling flat. The main themes of loyalty, morality, and racism are consistently brought up and I appreciate that they tackled such topics without attempting to hide the very ugly and disgusting parts of it -- that's exactly what early lis2 tries to accomplish. I don't need to tell you why racism is bad. The "do or die" nature of loyalty. Choosing what's morally correct over what you truly want. Teaching Daniel a balance of both, like Sean has.

Then in the end it says, "you can be separated from your cute little brother forever, who will always surrender to the police because he doesn't want to hurt anyone" OR "you stay together with a lunatic who uses violence first to solve his problems & is dangerous not only to your enemies but to YOU, he's already permanently disfigured you with little remorse."

It's like the messaging changed halfway through development. The first two episodes absolutely felt as though Sean was doing the right thing, because the police would racially profile him and lock him up away from his brother, who would go into the brutal foster system. America is unkind, and Sean & Daniel are victims of multiple situations that are completely out of their control. (Keep in mind this was peak Trump America and he was very aggressively encouraging violence against poc, specifically mexicans.) Without an adult, they're almost helpless to survive a country with no compassion for two orphans. Sean ran in the first place because the justice system is fucked. Then, by the end of the game, we're outright told due to Daniel's morality system that submitting to the police and "answering for your crimes" is the morally correct thing to do. Huh??

The whole point was that Sean didn't even kill that cop he was accused of, so what exactly is he answering for, morally? Everything he did after that was because the law was wrongfully pursuing him and he was a child with absolutely no resources and no help. He can make less moral decisions sure, but why does that mean GOING TO PRISON FOR A CRIME HE DIDN'T COMMIT? What did he do that he needed to answer for, morally? It doesn't make sense to me. Was the message, "no matter how hard you try you can't keep running, so just take it and don't put up a fight"? Really? Mind you the main themes are RACISM, loyalty, and morality. What the actual fuck are they trying to say with this game? They bring up topics, and never actually SAY ANYTHING ABOUT THEM!! Is the message, "life is unfair", maybe? Because it certainly wasn't just STRANGE. Also yeah, that's usually how conflict in a story works, I don't know why I had to sit thru the 9 hours of this poor kid getting his shit rocked just to for it to say, "that sucks, huh? :(" I will kill us both.

Despite these things bothering me, I actually DID enjoy experiencing the story. Lis games aren't about the destination or how you get there but the experience of travelling at all. I really liked Sean as a character, yeah he does annoying teenage boy things here and there but, well. That's what he is. One thing I wish was different is that after his initial development from lax brother to protective guardian, Sean never changes at all throughout the story and I really wish he could've grown a tiiiiiny spine instead of just becoming the punching bag of the game the last couple hours. Daniel was also really likable and super realistic as a kid dealing with life or death situations, developing from relying entirely on Sean to outright refusing to let Sean take the lead. I think ep 4 was easily the weakest chapter and it really backtracks on ep 3, where Daniel was straight up a direct danger to Sean. (Not just destroying his eye, but he repeatedly knocks Sean to the ground, refuses to even hear him out, and threatens him with that display at the lake) Still, I like em. :)

Even though the messaging is very stilted and the final two episodes feel like they were just. Balls off the walks high and took two coherent ideas and fucked them up, I still enjoyed the game. There were times at the end that it felt like it was written/planned around the same time of ep1 or ep2 because it felt less stiff. I would've been very happy if there was a sequel or anything tbh connected to the story of the brothers because I came to really care about them!! <3 Alright, back to complaining enough sap!!!!!!

#lindsay speaks #lis2 #i have a couple other things to say esp abt ep 3 but I'll save it bec this post is long

[elnotwoods]

One thing I particularly enjoy about the evolution of Sean’s feelings and his relationship with White is that it happened slowly but you can clearly see when the switch flicked on for Sean…

From the first moment Sean has been watching “Black” like a hawk… you can see him being perplexed and a bit suspicious about Black’s sudden personality change.

When Sean opens the door to his room suddenly and raises his fist, “Black” backtracks and covers his face which must be a very unBlack thing to do. From what we saw of the past, Black has always been the more hotheaded one, the one ready to fight and stand up for himself. So for “Black” to instead cover his face and actually wait for the punch,instead of throwing one himself, is already suspicious.

And Sean noticed. Because of course he does. I bet he notices so much more because his and Blacks relationship is the rockiest one out of all of them at the garage. Gram seems to be in love with Black and also carries a lot of guilt and shame for kissing Eugene and maybe that’s why he doesn’t notice as much. Yok noticed too, but he also has Dan on his mind 24/7 so he isn’t as invested. But Sean is the one always at the garage and always watching “Black”.

Black has trouble riding his bike, doing work around the garage… he also suddenly questions their actions and how they will be viewed by the public. And he is also gentler, less aggressive and actually gives a damn about Sean. The old Black wouldn’t have cared about Sean, he already left him behind once. Yet suddenly, “Black” hugs him through his nightmares and consoles him, he cares about Sean and if he is hurt.

All of this tips Sean off and that’s why he starts to question this whole thing. I think their moment under the pride flag also shifted something between them. It looks to me like Sean acknowledged that he himself has different feelings for “Black” and for a moment he lets himself be and enjoy the moment. “Black” being this unusually smiling, cheerful and energetic just adds to the list of weird unBlack like behaviours.

Once Sean sorts his head out he investigates. He comes over to “Black” and the moment they have is significant and another milestone in their relationship. Because Sean opens up and “Black” accepts him, consoles him and thanks him for opening up. He trusts him and thanks him for giving that trust back.

And Sean does trust him. Him snooping around isn’t about not trusting him. I think he actually trusts this version of “Black” even more than the real one. Sean just really wants answers because he must be confused too. Cause suddenly he has feelings for someone he never really got along with and this person seems so different yet so identical to the one he had beef with. Sean just needs to confirm all of this.

You can see it once White wakes up and asks about being tied up. Sean already knows, but he isn’t angry. He’s actually amused.

(I also think that out of all of them, Sean was the one much more likely to not be mad at White for lying. I think Sean gets that something must have happened for White to come in and pretend to be Black. And Sean understands the need to protect his family and the ones he loves.)

Now that we know why Sean tied “Black” up, him checking that the “Black” who came over for the stake out is the one Sean wants there. Because the ropes left a mark on his wrists and Sean can confirm his identity without tipping White off.

The rest of the episode Sean seems way gentler himself. Every time he is anywhere near White he visibly softens. He teases him and engages with him but it’s not so rough. He also smiles much more and looks giddy when he runs across the rooftop with White’s hand tightly holding his.

It’s also worth pointing out that from the moment Sean confirms that “Black” is not Black… Sean doesn’t address him as Black anymore.

He is also way touchier with White, he seeks his presence and he openly flirts with him on that rooftop. Sean takes a breather to collect himself after that trust fall, giving himself a moment to calm his nerves down before making his move.

(Don’t even get me started on the trust fall and how it’s basically Sean’s way of asking White that if he fell for him, would White be there to catch him? Can Sean trust him with his heart?)

And once Sean is a 100% sure about this all, he goes for it. He seizes the opportunity and actually lets himself go and kisses White. Because now he knows and now trusts him too.

#not me #not me the series #seanwhite #seanblack #sean x white #i loved the way Sean worked this out on his own #not me meta #stream of consciousness #el’s thoughts

[heretherebedork]

Oh this new episode of Not Me was so much but mainly just amazing. Sean is so happy~ when he calls White because he is so in love and ready to tell him, like the nervousness and his hands and just everything, Off foes this brilliantly. Also, shout out to Gumpa, love that man. And then the scene when Sean doesn't fight back, you described it so beautifully, it broke my heart. Also, Namo illustrating Sean's hurt graffiti was such a beautiful and unique thing.

The next episode is going to be a wild ride I think, but I am so happy White is back at Sean's side.

Sorry for all the rambling, Thank You for the lovely commentary, I am always so excited to go to your blog after I finished an episode.

-🌸

Sean not fighting back is immensely painful because Sean has always fought back. He has never let anyone hit him without bringing his fists into action. That was the first thing he ever did with White, grab him and almost punch him.

And now.

Now he lies on the ground and stares up at the face of the man he loves and he does nothing. Because he cannot handle the dichotomy of the softness and love they shared and the way Black is just... mercilessly beating him. He cannot fight back against a broken heart because the real pain is in his chest, the real pain is his heart getting torn apart.

Gumpa's support was so darling. I just wish we could know more of what he knows. Because there's no way he doesn't know that Black wasn't Black for a while there. But he also has no way of knowing that Black was back. So... there's so much going on. And it all hurts so much.

Namo giving Sean the comfort of art was absolutely beautiful. She let him release and then showed him how much more there is than just the words that broke his heart and the words that took his apart and the broken heart that still beats in his chest.

Now he just has to understand who White is and who Black is and the truth will set them free.

I actually think next episode is going to be less of a ride than this week. I think next week is the full White reveal and some pain for DanYok and Black off doing his own thing and then we get in the penultimate and finale and that's where shit hits the fan. I really do suspect that next week is going to be a tiny bit of a lull. Rough and rocky, yes, but more of an emotional lull with some comfort for most of the characters.

Never apologize for rambling! :D That's all I ever do. Thank you for enjoying my stuff and I hope I did well again this week. This episode needs a bit of time to sit, I think, and I'm slowly realizing more and more little bits the longer I sit after.

#not me #not me the series #not me series #seanwhite #sean x white #thai drama #thai series #gmmtv #gmmtv series #gmmtv drama #i love them all so much #i am so destroyed

[thealexchen]

i’ve actually read both of the articles that you mentioned earlier! I could see where both of them were coming from at varying points, though shannon liao’s struck me as a tad harsh, as someone who felt very seen by Alex, particularly with regard to her asian-american identity, and the cultural details and familial attitudes you see displayed throughout the game (especially in episode 5.) I could see why others would like them to be more overt, but they’re still present & relevant as is, imo.

I'm happy you read and enjoyed them! Well, since we’re on the subject, I might as well give my fuller thoughts about all this. This answer got horrendously long, so I'm putting it under a read more. I really wanted to talk about this more fully, so thank you for sending this ask!

I definitely see Robert's point in his article. Alex didn’t need to be Asian for the story of True Colors to be told, but it’s still meaningful that she is so that Asian fans and fans of color can look up to her and feel represented. The Chens buck a lot of stereotypes too: Mrs. Chen was not a “tiger mom” and her kids and husband remember her fondly. Mr. Chen doesn’t push Alex and Gabe to excel in school, and in fact neither Alex nor Gabe went to college, but they still had happy futures. Alex isn’t the best friend or the Asian schoolgirl or the dragon lady or the Asian nerd. But at the same time, when Robert says "Alex never really talks about her thoughts on Chinese culture,” that’s like— well, what’s wrong with talking about it? Why not talk about it more explicitly? The words “Asian” and “Chinese” and “Vietnamese” aren’t even used in the game when "gay" and "lesbian" were, and that's a little disappointing.

I figured people would figure out Alex was at least Chinese because of her last name, but I saw some streamers unsure of what Alex’s ethnicity even was (“Alex is… Chinese, right?”). That was disappointing because Asians tend to be treated as a monolith when we’re so internally diverse. Also, it’s completely possible to miss that Alex and Gabe are also half-Vietnamese. Their mother’s name is Giang “Wendy” Chen, a Vietnamese name, but that’s only in the credits. There’s far less Vietnamese (and Southeast Asian) rep than Chinese, so I wish that had been made more explicit.

In Life is Strange 2, Sean and Daniel’s struggles (personal and institutional) were centered around their identity as half-Mexican boys. True Colors almost seemed to be going in the opposite direction in that Alex’s Asian heritage never really becomes plot-relevant, but Alex and Gabe’s background comes into focus in the last chapter.

Part of Shannon’s critique was that because Alex’s parents aren’t in the picture, the game can’t explore Asian culture through a familial lens. There is some truth to that: for children of immigrants in particular, their parents are their strongest (and sometimes only) link to their race and culture. I thought a big missed opportunity was exploring Alex’s possible sense of isolation and struggle to reconnect with her Asian heritage after being separated from her family.

After growing up with two Asian parents, eating Asian food, celebrating Asian holidays, likely speaking Asian languages, etc. it would have likely been disorienting and lonely for Alex to suddenly be raised by non-Asian foster parents and lose all those traditions all at once. Possible comments like “I really miss Mom’s pho” or “Do you know how difficult it is to find hoisin sauce in the stores around here?” could have inferred more at that specific kind of loss and isolation in Haven Springs. The game touches upon this very briefly when you look at Gabe’s shrine, and Alex does comment “I don’t even know if I’m doing this right… but I felt like I had to do something.” In this way, I find it especially poignant that she still held onto cultural traditions after so long.

But I still thought Shannon’s critique was overly harsh. The little details really do add up, like in Alex’s childhood home, and meant a lot to me too. And most importantly, there was representation behind the scenes too: Alex was voiced by two(!) Asian American women and the lead writer, Felice Kuan, is Chinese. I think Alex naming her mouse Shu-shu was my favorite detail. Because it’s the one detail you can’t miss. Every streamer remembers Shu-Shu’s name and loves how cute she is and they can probably infer it’s a Chinese term. It just is so visible and empowering in that way and my heart felt warm every time I heard someone say “Aw! Shu-shu!"

But that doesn't mean Alex's Asian heritage didn't matter at all. I really appreciated that Alex's backstory still mattered because she came from a poor, working-class immigrant family. Her life circumstances were used for drama, but none of Alex's suffering was racially motivated and that felt tastefully done. I’m gonna paraphrase a comment I saw on alliebeemac’s playthrough of episode 5: "It's no coincidence that both Alex and Ryan lost their mothers at a young age, but because Ryan's father was a military veteran and had a high-paying job as a Typhon foreman, he got to keep his childhood whereas Alex's entire world was torn apart... And if you want to look at it even more metaphorically, the white patriarch Jed was able to preserve his own image as a hero and 'good old boy' of Haven by literally sacrificing an immigrant family to the mines with the expectation that nobody would come looking for them. Whether you're an immigrant or whether you're a foster child, the system is saying 'we don't care about you.'"

And at the end, Alex tells Jed, "You want to look away and pretend the men you hurt weren't people. But I won't let you.” It's a deliberate stand against Jed (a white man)’s dehumanization of poor laborers, including her Chinese immigrant father. Jed isn't explicitly portrayed as a racist, but his actions come from a privileged, and subsequently racist and classist place. For me, it worked better than LiS2's portrayal of racism because it was subtler and more personal. Alex stands up against Jed out of a personal sense of justice for her brother (and her father).

Do I wish we had more? Yeah, absolutely. I wish Alex got to actually speak Mandarin or Vietnamese in the game because that's so rare in games, even though I knew that would be unrealistic because Erika Mori is Japanese. I wish the character artists had at least made a version of Alex and Gabe’s models without shoes, because it just didn’t look right to see them wear shoes in the house (especially in bed??) and even LiS2 had Sean and Daniel in their socks in some scenes. I wish Alex and Gabe talked more about their family while Gabe was still alive and Alex could have had that comfort of someone who misses the food and customs they used to celebrate. But like I said, one piece of media isn’t gonna please everyone. And Asian representation in particular is so tricky because not only is there not enough of it, but Asian Americans are so diverse and come from so many different backgrounds. Children of immigrants are going to feel more connected to their Asian heritage than third or fourth gen kids or mixed race kids for example. Everyone is going to have a different definition of “Asian culture” and “accurate representation.”

But on a meta-level, it really means so much to simply have an Asian face on the box of a major Western game ❤️ Like even just seeing the way Alex's eyes crinkle when she smiles or how other characters find her attractive (like Steph’s note during the LARP preferring Alex’s natural black hair), it feels so affirming. It’s incredible to see an Asian girl be called the hero of her own story, to see her succeed and fail and cry and laugh and fall in love and kiss another woman and be comfortable in her bisexuality. It acknowledges that the queer community includes Asians, that Asian girls can also be curvy, that Asian girls can and do struggle with mental health. And like Erika Mori said, Alex is a fully-realized character and that’s what makes her so compelling, first and foremost. She also has a strong moral compass and dreams and fears and is such an incredible role model for people of all backgrounds, and that’s what makes her identity as a queer woman of color so much more meaningful.

#life is strange true colors #listc #asian representation #answered asks #anon #alex chen #gabe chen #chen sibs #life is strange #true colors #true colours #lis: tc #life is strange 3 #my post

[sideblogformindtrash]

First, I got Sean interested in a Facebook Marketplace listing attached to my fake account, but it’s a 3 hour drive. But it’s a really, really good deal. Pumpkin has at least 6 hours alone.

And the address is one of those isolated addresses that GPS never gets quite right, so he’ll be driving around for a while. 😈

Next, I get a first aid kit and bring a burner phone with me because I don’t trust Sean. I googled “how to remove tongue piercing” and “healing tongue piercing” so I TOTALLY know what I’m doing.

I brought my Cabbage Patch Kid doll for Pumpkin to squeeze and keep. With my nitrile gloves on, I gently encourage Pumpkin to open his mouth, and let him know that Sean won’t be back for some hours. I follow the instructions about removing the tongue piercing, taking liberties as necessary since a nail is a lot messier. Luckily the gauze in the first aid kit soaks up the blood.

Once the nail is removed, I give it to Pumpkin because he knows Sean better than I do - I assume he would be less angry if he assumed Pumpkin took it out himself instead of knowing Pumpkin has a trespasser ally.

I encourage Pumpkin to hold the gauze to his tongue with pressure to stop the bleeding as I make a lukewarm saltwater solution for him to rinse with.

After rinsing with the warm salt water, I bring Pumpkin a large glass of water to drink as needed. I wipe the blood from his mouth and face with a warm washcloth and wrap him in the blanket I gave him.

Then I hug Pumpkin and tell him he’s a really, really good boy and that I love him and that he can keep the doll if he likes it.

Finally, I take the remnants of my first aid kit and get out of that place before Sean comes back and writes down my license plate number and description of my car.

I applaud your preparation 👀👀🥺

He has never felt so loved in his life and hearing that he is a good boy brings tears to his eyes. The water feels amazing, soothing his aching throat, and closing his mouth hurts a lot, before feeling relieving.

Pumpkin is so so so so scared, though. He thinks they'll be hurt so much more, so much worse, now that he is out of the punishment.

...even more so because Sean will be so angry and frustrated after losing his entire day following a fake ad, that he will need to take the anger out on someone, you know?

He hugs the doll, curled up on his new blanket, thinking of where he can hide them so Sean doesn't take them away.

He does that and prepares his meal for the next day and hides it too, because he knows he won't have enough stenght to do anything after Sean is done with him.

#pumpkin the whumpee #pumpkin the poor little meow meow

[tamsin-moon]

Home With You

Notes: Charles Smith x GN Reader. Warnings of capture, injuries, cursing, but overall is happy. Reader and Charles got together about two months after he joined the gang. Reader joined the gang at about the same time as Javier so is quite close with everyone. Reader got captured in Blackwater by Ike Skelding, but taken separately from Sean.

How long had you been tied up? That was the question most prominent in your mind most days. At first you had been able to keep track, but after a couple of weeks now at least, you had no idea. The memory of what had happened was as fresh in your mind as it was blurry with how much of a mess Blackwater had turned into. You know the job had started well and things were going to plan, but then as if a switch had been flipped everything was hell. You remember being with Sean when more then just the Pinkertons had shown up. You then remembered a searing pain in your side as a bullet hit you, followed by a couple men grabbing you and tying you up.

From there between the pain, adrenaline and blood loss everything had gone dark. Eventually you had woken up in a shack, still tied and gagged with your wound patched up and things gone. Angry and scared you had tried to get free, but it hadn’t worked. Eventually you learned who had you, Ike Skelding and his gang, but you did not know much more then that they were big and nasty. As days passed you would be barely fed, but kept alive and your wound cleaned up till it eventually healed. The gang debating what to do with you as the Pinketons bounty was good, but the O’Driscolls were paying for information as well. At least that is what you gathered when the men slipped up and talked around you.

Overall you had gotten thinner and weak, just wishing they would make up their minds already on what to do with you. As much as you still hoped for a rescue by your family it was looking less and less likely by the day and as much as it hurt to think about they probably thought you were dead. Your mind drifting to Charles in the end, as it always did, you would cry if you had any tears left as you once again realized you may never see him again.

Unknown to you, though, your hope for a rescue should actually be much higher as the day after Sean’s welcome home party the Irishman was going to find Arthur. Though he was quite hungover and his head was pounding it had sparked a memory in him. Just tidbits of stuff he had heard during his own capture, but if it was correct then someone needed to look into it fast. He would make sure, though, that Charles was not around as it was about you and he did not want to get his hopes up if he were to end up being wrong. Luckily it seemed the man was out of camp so when Sean found Arthur he was speaking plainly, “Hey Arthur, need to talk to ya’ about something”

At first Arthur would let out a sigh as he was settled at one of the tables and nursing his own hangover, but looking up and seeing Sean’s face he knew when the man was actually serious. Motioning for him to sit he would nod, “What is it? Can’t wait till my head stops pounding?” he asks a bit gruffly, but was rubbing a hand over his face when Sean shook his head and started speaking. “Was my own pounding head that had me remembering, when Skeldings boys had me tied up now and again I heard ‘em talking about someone else. Was busy trying to keep my own hide alive so it never really sunk in, but I heard ‘em mention grabbing the person from Blackwater. It might be Y/n.”

This would have Arthurs attention real quick and he was glad they were talking low, looking around to see most of the camp still asleep or just coming around as he did not want them overhearing such a sensitive topic. “Any idea where they are? Even if it isn’t them it needs to be looked into” he say after a moment and Sean would be scratching the side of his face, “Hoping I heard right but someplace called Widow Rock. Sounds like a spot they like to keep supplies more than folk so might be easy to search, but that’s all I really know”

It was a bit vague, but Arthur had been by the spot once, but not close enough to really see what was there. Eventually nodding he would get up, “Let’s go talk to Dutch about this.” Not even letting the man respond before he was heading for the tent in the middle of camp to do just that. Once everything was explained Dutch would be looking between the two of them, eventually nodding. “Arthur, take Lenny and go check it out. Try to keep it quiet cause we do not need to fight these boys again if it’s nothing” he instruct and it was easily agreed upon, Lenny looked the least threatening so if they were spotted it would be easier to play it off.

Sean did want to protest it had been his tip, but just being rescued himself he was not in right enough shape to really be useful. He would go and see the two off once they were ready and Lenny was in the loop, giving them both a nod before they were off, “Hope I am actually right about this” being all he said, the pair just nodding in return before turning and heading off at a trot. It would be a bit of a trip to get there and it was fairly quiet one once Lenny had asked all the questions he could think of, evening falling by the time they got into the vicinity.

Hitching their horses to a couple trees they would go the rest of the way on foot, guards up of course and soon reaching a vantage point. Looking over at what seemed to be a cabin, a few tents around and a couple wagons it actually seemed very quiet, definitely more of a supply hub. “So what’s the plan,” Lenny ask quietly once they put down their binoculars and Arthur would think, “Seems everyone is asleep or gone, you keep watch from here while I check out the cabin. If Y/n is here that’s where I’d keep a hostage. Whistle if someone starts coming to it.” It was a simple plan, really, but sometimes those worked the best and putting up his mask he would move.

Slow and steady he would keep low and to any bushes, hand ready to go to his gun, but for once things seemed to be on their side as he got to the door. Pushing inside quietly he would almost gasp as he came to the sight of you tied up on the bed, though asleep at the moment. Steadying himself he would creep close and gave your shoulder a shake, finger over his masked lips as you jolted awake, but the gag kept you from making any sound as it was. Your eyes widening as your senses came back to you, you would recognize him easily as he pulled his mask down a moment, “Just keep quiet, getting you out of here” he assure and once you nodded he was removing the gag.

From there he would cut your bonds and was returning your hug when you wrapped your arms around him tightly before you were hearing a whistle, “I got ya’, but we gotta move” he speak quietly before helping you up. Your legs wanting to give out on you as you did he pull your arm over his shoulder to keep you up. Getting back out the cabin he would have you both in the bushes as a man round the corner, but luckily he would not go inside giving you time to get back to Lenny. Hugging the younger man just as tightly as you had Arthur it would not be until you were back to the horses that you finally found your voice again, “Thank you, both of you”

It was hoarse, your throat dry from the damn rag near constantly in your mouth and never getting much to drink, but it was steady. “Just sorry we didn’t know where you were sooner” Arthur say as he help you up behind Lenny once he had mounted, “You’re safe now, let’s get back” the younger would add. Both spurring their horses into a trot once you were ready as a shout got your attention. Seemed they noticed you were gone, but you had a good enough lead they wouldn’t find you and the ride settled easily enough.

The trip back they would get you caught up on everything that had happened, who had survived, the train robbery and rescuing Sean. Letting you know it was said Irishman who got them to you as well and you would hum, “Will have to make sure to thank him” you agree before asking the question most on your mind, “How is Charles?” They had assured he was alive, but had he given up on you? Did he still want you? You were worried and Arthur would just give you a look, “He misses you, a lot, been even quieter than usual and does anything to keep himself busy” he tell you in a firm tone, all of them having been starting to worry about the man and if he was heading towards a breaking point.

As morning began to dawn again would be when the three of you were finally getting back and you could feel your heart pounding. You were eager to see everyone again of course, yet oddly nervous, so much had happened, but as you heard Javier calling out to you the happiness was winning out. Nearly falling as you slip from the saddle you were nearly tackling the surprised man in a hug, just needing the contact to know all of this wasn’t some dream. Feeling him hug you back tightly you would hear him say something in Spanish before repeating himself so you understood, “Y/n, you feel like a stick, but it is so good to see you”

Giving you a squeeze he push you along gently, though your legs were wobbly still with how weak you were, but you were determined to walk back to camp on your own, “Have Grimshaw look you over and Charles should be back tonight, think he went hunting boars on Pearsons request” he explain to you and you thank him, at least you would be able to clean up a bit then. Taking a deep breath as you head up the path with the others you could feel tears forming as you saw the wagons and everything turning into a blur as Tilly spot you first.

Your name shouted you would be pulled into different hugs and embraces before Grimshaw was getting hold of you. Being ushered into a tent she would be checking you over, fussing over every bruise and bump. Your wrists would be wrapped where the rope had rubbed them raw and any other cut would be patched up before she was letting you go, reminding you to eat slowly till your body could handle food fully again before she was hugging you tight herself. From there you would make your way to you and Charles tent, Tilly showing you where it was, and you felt your heart nearly in your throat as you enter.

Your trunk and bedroll were in a corner of it, though clearly there and taken care of, and when you open the trunk you would feel fresh tears. Inside would be a new gunbelt, looking to be trapper made, a clean knife and revolver settled inside, but it would make it clear your love had faith you would return. Moving the items carefully you would find fresh pants and a shirt to change into and for the first time in weeks you felt as clean as you could without a bath. Coming back out you would take the dirty clothes to be used for rags, they were torn up anyways and you weren’t sure if you could wear them again.

Heading to talk to Dutch and Hosea next you would tell them everything you could, though it really was not much, about what had happened to you. Both of them encouraging you to get your strength back up you thank them, eventually just settling by the main campfire and talking with any who came by. Mary-Beth bringing you water now and again along with a can of fruit to start getting you healthy. You would be sitting in front of the log, leaning against it and drifting into a nap now and again, the noise and bustle soothing over all.

Eventually evening would begin to fall again and you would have a little bit of stew. Looking up as Javier came to you once more he would be smiling, nodding towards Pearsons area, “Just saw Charles bringing stuff over there” he tell you and it had your heart clenching a moment as you look over. Getting to your feet you would not care what happened to the bowl as you made your way over, but once you were close you could not even find your voice.

Charles, meanwhile, was a bit confused. Was the camp really still in such a good mood from Sean coming back? He supposed it could be true, but yet at the same time everyone had just been giving him almost knowing looks and like they had something to say. It had him a bit frustrated as he brought over the pork, boar tusks and hides he had gathered. Honestly he had not cared why the man wanted the stuff in particular, he would take any distraction to keep his mind off of you. He did not want to forget you, no not that at all, just it hurt to think about as by now if you had not been found you were most likely dead.

He just couldn’t accept that, though, and could feel his thoughts wandering again before he realized Pearson was talking to him, “Mr. Smith I said you may want to turn around.” The cook would have that same knowing look and it had Charles arching a brow, just what was going on, but he would do as told. When he did it would be as if the world stopped, eyes widening as they fell on you, and he realized he was frozen as when a deep first sees a cougar. Had he died suddenly? He couldn’t even breathe and could feel his vision starting to go dark.

You would see him freeze and at first would stop moving yourself, but as you saw him starting to almost shake you were closing the distance. Hands cupping his cheeks quickly, “Charles? Sweetheart you need to breathe” you tell him firmly, worry beginning to build until you saw him take a breath. For him the world would seem to move again at your touch and your voice, his body reacting before his mind even could. Arms wrapping around you tightly he would be pulling you into his chest as his face buried into your shoulder, “Y/n?” It would come out almost as a whisper, but you heard it clearly.

Wrapping him tight in your arms in return you would be pressing kisses to his head, one hand coming up to run your fingers through his hair gently, “I’m here, I’m alive” you assure as you could feel him shaking and hot tears soaking into the shoulder of your shirt. Around you the others would be giving you space, but you would gently coax him over to a log in the tree line for a little privacy. You were almost surprised as he pulled you onto his lap, but would relish the closeness. His embrace what you had missed most of all and as your eyes met you could see all the emotion in them.

It matched your own in the fear and loneliness you had been feeling while captured, changing to the immense relief and happiness you felt now in his arms. Cupping his cheeks again to brush his tears away you did not miss as he leaned into your touch, asking slowly what had happened. Of course you would tell him what you remembered and then being rescued by Arthur and Lenny. The silence following a serene one as his forehead came to rest against your own, though he soon spoke, “I was just about to give up, when we found Sean and not you it was another blow and it seemed hopeless” he admit and it just had you softening.

You could understand, though, you had heard about them losing a bounty when it had happened. They had been so mad and it was where some of your recent bruises were from, but you would just lean in and kiss him slowly. Assuring you both you were together again, “I’m here, I am home.” Being all you said before his lips were on yours again in a deeper kiss, his hands finding your waist to pull you closer. You would feel him pause, though, breaking the kiss as he looked at you closely. He could see the thinness of your face and it had his worry spiking.

“I will get you healthy again” he say, his tone serious and it would have a chuckle coming from your lips, the first in so long. You would kiss his nose lightly, “I am sure you will and I am not going anywhere” you promise in return before he was wrapping you in his arms again. You could hear Javier begin to play his guitar, the others getting louder as they were celebrating another good thing, but right now you just stayed where you were, relishing the embrace of your love. You were home.

#rdr2 #rdr2 reader insert #charles smith x gn reader #charles smith x reader #gn reader #charles smith

[bananxious]

Tell me more about Stinky I love the way you write about him

Thank you 😭 I have some snippets of writing I've been sitting on so maybe I will dump them here ! In the meantime here's a bunch of notes I kept for my writing under the cut:

I like the idea of a him being mostly unwilling guardian to them while Granny Ruth is away on deployment, and she'd be calling his diner from a phone box in Gibraltar during her brief moments on land to check up on her boys. The two of them would have some pretty frosty interactions, and Granny Ruth would definitely know of some dark secret that could get him arrested/deported which she uses as blackmail. If even a hair on either of Sam or Max's head were to get hurt, she'd be on his doorstep with a binder of surveillance photos and call transcripts with a small troop of FBI agents in tow. OR she'll just beat the snot out of him, it's all the same to her!

He lives on a decommissioned tug boat, no doubt Sam n Max will manage to sink that thing by the time I'm finished writing. It's basically your grandparents attic, but with a hull.

He's probably lying about ever having been in the navy.

His actual surname would be Smellie but he changed it upon emigrating to the US. Or it's a spy thing. Or both!

He'd lie about where in Scotland he's from constantly, Glasgow, outer Hebrides, Orkney islands, whatever sounds coolest. But he's bound to be from some place with a crap name like Skegness. (No hate to Skegness). All I can really say is with his accent, he sounds like he's meant to be from the west coast.

I assume in-game his tattoos are the same image due to some design/time limitations or something but I like to think he'd have a varied collection of sun-faded and blown out sailor tats, maybe a few on the chest and back of differing quality. Monsters, mermaids, ships, and of course the obligatory Scottish flag/lion rampant/thistle motifs. Maybe a local football club? Junior Sam and Max think they are Bad Ass either way.

I'd make a joke about him putting haggis in everything but right now in Scotland you really CAN get haggis in/on everything (including only the food I've actually had: haggis burgers, hot dogs, gyoza, burritos, curry, various pasta dishes, nachos, pizza, bao buns) "Hag Spag" aka haggis spaghetti would be the leftover food for the night chucked in a pot with haggis, pasta, and tomato sauce, which Gramps calls the "staff meal" to make it sound less like he's offloading food waste. He's essentially using Sam and Max as a garbage disposal and they love it, and Gramps quietly attributes Sam's impressive height and weight to the constant diet of off-cuts and offal he's been feeding him, a silent point of pride even if Max is still stuck at around 3 feet tall. He'd be the kind to keep shovelling the food onto Sam's plate and then excuse it as "well it wiz goin' out anyway!" (Grandparent instinct strong even if he won't admit it. Eat up lad!)

I also thought it'd be funny if he were a particularly crap spy for the USSR (Sam n Max have a floaty timeline but I'm pinning the childhood stuff pre-90s). This is a direct reference to Sean Connery in Hunt for Red October who despite apparently playing a Russian sailor he has the exact same Scottish accent he has in every other film. It also gives Grandma Ruth some blackmail fodder, but she knows he's harmless - he's essentially a noisy decoy meant to pull attention away from the ACTUAL espionage going on. All of this goes over the heads of child/teen Sam n Max who just wanna play with all the dangerous antiques in his home and don't know/care what a communist is.

He's a fatal combination of both arrogant and gullible (he falls for everything Skun'ka'pe says and does for instance). Sam and Max learn very young that it's super easy to get out of trouble with him through thinly veiled flattery and blatant lying. Defuse his tirade by complimenting his chilli con carne and he'll totally forget what it was he was even raging on about! The two of them would wind him up constantly and he'd never cotton on to their tricks.

Bluster Blaster has definitely booted himself up in the middle of the night and almost sent Grandpa Stinky into cardiac arrest from shock.

He would almost never be affectionate or give compliments without qualifiers, but Sam and Max have long since assumed this is just how Scottish people are and don't take it personally. If anything they love it, it's great to have a guardian who's the opposite of overbearing, and they know fine well if he genuinely hated their guts he'd be aggressively ignoring them before fetching his shotgun, which they have seen only once much to Max's disappointment. What matters more to them is he's one of the few adults that actually listen (even if his advice is mostly worthless) and he'll stick up for them if need be (even if he just enjoys picking a fight). Unreasonable teacher at school? Call grandpa! Someone cutting in line at the store? Grandpa won't stand for that. Someone called Sam fat? Grandpa says let's take this outside.

Alright I think that's enough for now. I haven't really touched on Girl Stinky yet but cantankerous old eejit + sardonic valley girl mermaid sounds like a pretty funny combo ripe for comedic mining. Next time I guess!

#according to the devs he was based on Sean Connery + Ernest Hemingway #and I thank them for not giving him an obvious Connery impression. instead he sounds like an impression of someones miserable uncle #bananxious babbling

[kim-ruzek]

sometimes you just don't know the answer

Summary: But typical Kim, typical naive, always believing the best in people Kim, thought that even though Adam and her have been out of sync, even though any time any serious conversations comes up it seems like Adam doesn’t listen or pay attention, even though things haven’t been exactly good, Kim thought they both had the same end goal. To be married, happy, in a strong relationship.

Evidently, she was wrong.

Set in S3, fix it bc it circumvents the breakup.

Warnings: Bob Ruzek's A+ parenting, alluding to sexist thoughts, swearing

Word Count: 4k

Read on AO3

Notes: So. A few days ago Lexi ( @adamruz ) answered an ask and said her hc about Adam is that he never actually told Bob about the dinner with her mom and well.... My mind ran with it. And thus this was born.

I hope y'all enjoy (especially you Lexi ♥️)

“Coffee?” Kim looks over at Officer Samuel Innings, her assigned partner for her overtime shift. It’s the first time on the whole shift that Kim is glad, not irritated, at the sight of him—although it’s more to do with the coffee cup he’s holding out for her than him.

“Thanks.” She gives him a smile—he may be one of my most irritating people she’s ever met, but she’s still polite, especially when there’s coffee involved. Innings only needed to go into the shop because he needed the toilet—or, ‘needed to take a whiz’, as he so elegantly put ten minutes earlier—she didn’t expect that he’d pick her up a coffee. From what she had seen from the hours she’s already been on this shift, he’s annoying and she had thought not very considerate.

“It’s two sugars, no cream, right?” Innings double checked.

It’s not, but coffee is coffee so Kim smiles gratefully at him, nodding, before taking a sip, feeling better already knowing that coffee will be soon coursing through her body.

“Do you think we’re gonna get a call?” He only gives Kim a few seconds peace of silence before he speaks again and she has to resist so hard to not roll her eyes. Innings is young, green, and maybe his eagerness could be seen as admirable if it wasn’t so grating. He has no restraint, nattering on and bothering her, and offering his unsolicited complaints about what members of public they’ve dealt with in this shift.

He’s not the kind of partner she’d like on her regular shift, but even more on this graveyard shift, when she’s tired, when she’s already in a mood, when all she wants is just peace and quiet.

He almost makes her wish she had taken Sean up on his offer to join her on this shift. Kim had turned him down, stating she didn’t want to take away his day off just because she’s giving it up—and of course, that was a reason for it, but it wasn’t the only reason.

She just wanted silence, monotony, and she wouldn’t get that with Sean. Her mind is clouded, and he—as well intended as Kim’s sure he is—would only make it worse. But she hadn’t anticipated Innings, and is debating if the devil she knows would’ve been better than the devil she doesn’t.

“You never know.” She says in answer to his question. Her voice is dry, plain, monotone, not having it in her to bring any fake interest or life into it, even if she’s making sure she’s still being polite. Officers talk, and she doesn’t want to be known as a bitch who was in a mood—even if she’s very much feeling that way.

“I hope we do. But nothing like that last call, breaking up drunken sluts is no fun. Like they’re so dramatic, just go home with whatever man you picked up and fuck him and leave us out of it.” Kim screws up her nose at his words, taking another sip of her coffee to hide her disgust at his attitude, making a mental note to tell Trudy about it.

Not that she might necessary be able to do anything about it; Kim’s been outsourced to a beat in another district, Innings not working at hers. Trudy’s wrath would come down like a wall of bricks on any officer in the twenty-first that she gets a whiff of this kind of attitude, but Innings reports to a different desk Sargent.

Although, Trudy Platt is a formidable woman, and Kim knows that she’ll take this up with the other desk Sargent, and god help him if he doesn’t at least hear Platt out.

Even when Kim was new at the twenty-first, she was glad that she had Platt as a desk sergeant, admiring her no nonsense personality. She’s exactly the kind of Sargent cops need, and as Kim listens to Innings prattle on, it makes her wonder whatever possessed her to sign up for this overtime, to willingly seek work—willing seek to interact with officers who aren’t Trudy’s—outside her district.

Of course, Kim does know what possessed her. When seeking this, she had told everyone—well, Platt, Adam and Roman—that she wanted the overtime money, for the expenses in her near future. It’s believable, and it won’t hurt to have the money, of course.

Even though Kim has her doubts whether or not she’ll actually need it—those expenses will only happen if they can actually set a date for their wedding and pick out a place to live. And as more time goes on, the less convinced she becomes that it’ll actually happen.

Which, really, is why she chose to work on her day off.

Everything in her life, her feelings, her relationship, Adam, it’s all very confusing in her head currently and the thought of sitting at home, doing nothing but letting it continue to fester, was an unbearable one.

Kim can’t help but feel guilty, though. It’s also Adam’s day off, and since Intelligence has been thigh deep in a case recently, they haven’t spent much time together and the time they have, all they’ve done is fight—if they’ve even done much talking. It’s usually silent, even when they’re curled up on the couch together, the silence permeates through the air, making it feel like they’re worlds apart.

But she also knows it being Adam’s day off makes this a good decision even more. There’s some serious questions that Kim’s having to ponder upon, and she fears that if they were alone, no work or distractions, they might truly fight. Most of their fights end before they begin—verbally, at least—them exchanging a few heated words before they let their deafening silence say all the things they don’t.

But if they were alone, Kim fears that things might come to blows. And as much as she’s questioning her relationship with Adam, questioning his commitment to them, to her, to their future, she really doesn’t want that to happen. She doesn’t want to call quits on their relationship. And she knows how dangerously close they are to that happening; all it’ll take is one wrong thing to occur.

Like her, accidentally, in anger, yelling her half formed thoughts, her ineloquently put feelings about all what is annoying her.

They need the space, that’s what she tells herself. In a few days, Adam—and Bob Ruzek—will be meeting her mother, and while that won’t fix things, or makes her think they’ll set a date—even if that’s what Roman assumes she thinks—but it’ll be a hurdle they’ve gotten over, which means there’ll be one less hurdle in their way.

One hurdle closer to getting their relationship back in sync, to return to how they were, to being married and happy, even if it feels like they’ll never get there in this moment.

“Burgess? Burgess?” Kim is pulled out her thoughts by Innings, him lightly prodding at her. She’s alert straight away, going to her radio, assuming she had missed a call.

She hasn’t, as Innings quickly explains. He had just been talking to her and she had zoned out. He did, at least, apologize for alarming her.

“Sorry, my mind was somewhere else. What was you saying?” Kim really couldn’t care less what he was saying, but the politeness in her overrides.

“Your ring. I was asking if you’re engaged.” Innings indicates to her ring, and Kim smiles down at it for a couple seconds, reliving the happiness she felt when Adam first gave it to her months ago in her memories.

“Yeah, I am.” There’s a slight giddy feeling in her stomach, like butterflies flapping their wings, at the thought of Adam—her fiancé—and it’s the feeling that is what keeps her wanting to wait out this storm—even if she runs away like this on their days off—because surely, if she still feels like that, even if it’s lessened, if it’s hiding more from her, then the relationship is worth fighting for.

“What does he do?” Innings then asks.

“He’s a cop too. A patrol officer assigned to Intelligence.” Kim answers, while thinking that the pride that still swells in her heart as she talks about him is another reason to keep fighting. And suddenly, the guilt over leaving Adam alone on their day off surges and all she wants to do is go to him, to cuddle up and kiss him all over his face in apology—even if he didn’t know she needs to.

“Wow. Snagged yourself a good man, there.” Innings says and she’s annoyed at the words he used, at his tone, how Kim gets the impression that he’s more impressed with Adam’s achievements than he would be hers, but she repeats his words in her mind, because she has, and she wonders if her forgetting that might be the reason for their problems.

Luckily, they get some calls after that, and Kim doesn’t have to deal with just how much Innings irritates her—although his attitude towards the public really rubs her up wrong.

“Kim? I didn’t know you worked nights.” It’s a few hours later, and they’ve stopped into a twenty-four hour diner to get some coffee and a bite to eat and right as Kim gets served, she runs into Bob Ruzek, her future father in law.

As if her night couldn’t get any worse.

Adam’s father is not one of her favourite people, to say the least. She’s accepted that he’ll have to be a part of her life, of her children’s, and that Adam loves his dad but unexpectedly running into him is not something she’s very happy about.

“Bob, hi,” That politeness overrides again, and she greets her future father in law with a smile. For Adam, she reminds herself. He’s Adam��s dad, and Adam’s going to have to deal with the neuroticism that is her mother soon, so she can deal.

“I don’t usually, I’m putting in some overtime. The wedding won’t pay for itself,” Kim answers him, cracking a light smile, laughing slightly.

They chat for a few minutes, nothing too deep or substantial. Kim always wanted to have a good relationship with her in-laws growing up, but she’s glad that Bob seemingly doesn’t want to spend much time getting to know her like she feels towards him. From the corner of her eye, she sees Innings looking at her, and them, clearly trying to work out how they know each other.

“Right, I should be off.” Kim tells him as her food is handed over to her.

“Yeah. Tell Adam I said hi.” Bob nods and she forces a smile, hoping it doesn’t seem strained.

“Will do. Bye—until this Saturday, of course.” She says, referencing their arranged meal. Bob frowns, looking confused.

“What’s this Saturday?”

“The meal with my mom?” Kim prompts him, but Bob’s face is looking blank. Annoyance bubbles up in her, at him forgetting but then dots connect and she realises that Bob isn’t being the worst father in law right now—that he hasn’t forgotten, he just hasn’t been told.

Adam didn’t tell his dad.

Adam lied to her that he did.

“Never mind,” Kim waves him off, casually, even though her world is crumbling around her. They had discussions about how important this dinner is, how it’ll be unpleasant but they need it, and Adam had looked her in the eye and said his dad was on-board.

And he hadn’t even bothered to ask him, to tell him.

Roman had been saying from the start that Adam is just in this for the fun things, not the commitment, not the gruelling stuff. Her partner means well—even if sometimes it feels like he’s being contrary just for the sake of it—and Kim always listens to him because, well, because he’s her partner, but even when Adam failed that push test Roman recommended, she didn’t put much stock in what Roman had been saying.

She really should’ve.

But typical Kim, typical naive, always believing the best in people Kim, thought that even though Adam and her have been out of sync, even though any time any serious conversations comes up it seems like Adam doesn’t listen or pay attention, even though things haven’t been exactly good, Kim thought they both had the same end goal. To be married, happy, in a strong relationship.

Evidently, she was wrong.

Even though Adam has been letting her talk about this dinner. Even though he knows how nervous she is for him to meet her mom. Even though he knew all this, he still looked her in the eye and he lied to her.

Had told her he talked to his dad. Had told her Bob agreed. Had told her all this, had told her that he understood how important this was to her.

He had held her in their—his, because they still haven’t found a place that is theirs—bed and told her this all while knowing he was lying.

Kim spends the rest of her shift in a daze, trying to wrap her mind around this. Trying to process that everything Roman said was right, that Adam isn’t serious, that he doesn’t want to be married, that he doesn’t want to be on the hook.

That Adam’s just prolonging and putting off the wedding, doing everything he can too, because he doesn’t want to marry her.

Even though he was the one who proposed.

Kim’s mind wasn’t even thinking about marriage, before he proposed. Yes, the thought that she would like to—one day—marry him had propped up, of course it had. Adam is sweet, loving. He made her laugh, smile and comforted her when she had nightmares. And he was vulnerable around her, not afraid to show his softness... Of course thinking about making that man her husband had crossed her mind.

But as a serious thought, as a thought to happen at this time... That wasn’t even near close to being a thought in her head into she saw that ring.

Why would he do that, why would he introduce marriage into the equation, if it wasn’t serious about marrying her, about making her his wife and building a life with her?

It’s the morning when Kim’s shift finishes, and Adam’s still slumbering away in their—his—bed when she comes home. Normally, she’d concentrate on how cute, how peaceful he looks when he sleeps but she feels sick at the sight of him, all these thoughts and questions flooding her mind.

There’s room in the bed for her to climb into, but she can’t—she just can’t. Not when she’s just learnt this. She can’t lay her head next to his with betrayal sits in her heart, burning like a fierce woodland fire.

She grabs some spare blankets and pillows and sets up something on the sofa. She knows that when Adam wakes up, and sees her there, he’ll know something is up, something is wrong but Kim can’t find it in herself to care—not even with the knowledge that she had told Adam that she was sleeping for, hopefully, twelve hours today, so he’d know he wouldn’t get an answer to why she was on the sofa for hours.

When Kim comes too, it’s not the uncomfortable sofa lying under her back, but the nice comfortableness of Adam’s bed. She frowns slightly, as she sits up, confused to as she got here. She wonders, briefly, if she had imagined falling asleep on the couch before her mind wakes up properly and she realises that Adam must’ve carried her in here.

A sweet gesture like that would usually dampen the angry fire burning away in her heart but it doesn’t now; she’s too angry for it to. In fact, Kim thinks, it spurs on the fire, adding kindling to the flames, because how dare he move her? How dare he act as if he cares for her, as he clearly doesn’t, if he can look her in the eye and lie to her.

It’s not long before Kim’s heading out the bedroom, going to the living room. Sounds of Adam’s video games rings out and a darkness grips her heart as she wonders if the gesture wasn’t even that sweet, if it’s just because he needed the sofa to play his stupid games.

The gesture did nothing to melt her heart, but the thought of Adam not being motivated with kindness makes it more stony.

Kim is glad she doesn’t enter the room, guns blazing, as when she does, she sees that Adam is not alone, that Kevin is over, playing with him. She normally loves seeing the two most important men in her life hanging out, the sight always making her heart twist, but just like when she woke up in bed, in does nothing for her now.

“Hey, darlin’,” Adam spots her first, glancing briefly away from the TV to give her a smile. Kevin is then greeting her and she wishes she wasn’t so angry that she could even think about greeting Kevin back.

“You’ve been asleep for ages—I’m sorry about taking up all the bed. I assume that’s why you were on the sofa?” Adam continues talking, his eyes still looking at the TV as he does so, having not realised that something is up.

“Adam, stop the game.” Kim’s voice is devoid of it’s usual warmth.

“I will in a sec. Sorry, darlin’, I’m just so close to beating Kev,” Adam still doesn’t realise.

“The game’s not over yet, Ruzek.” Kevin apparently hasn’t either.

“Adam.” The word is chilled. “Turn it off. We need to talk, now. Kev, please, if you could leave.”

The game is paused then, the two turning to look at her. It’s almost comical how identical their oh fuck expressions are, and if Kim wasn’t so angry, so betrayed, so confused, she might’ve laughed at it.

Kevin moves first, quickly scrambling to get his stuff together, clearly seeing she means business. “Yeah, I should get home before Vinessa and Jordan do and wants dinner. Uh, nice seeing you. Bye.”

Kevin is not someone anyone messes with, even Adam having a moment of being spooked by him and the damage he could do to a person. But he looks like nothing more than a timid schoolboy now, as he hurries on out.

“What’s wrong, darlin’?” Adam asks as soon as Kevin shuts the door, having turned off the TV. He rises and he goes to come near here, his arms out, looking concerned. But she steps back, not wanting him anywhere near her.

“Why didn’t you tell your dad about the dinner?” She cuts straight to the point. Kim can see the moment, the oh shit moment, that Adam gets what she’s on about, but he plays dumb because apparently he wants to anger her more.

“What do you mean?”

“You know exactly what I mean. On my shift, I ran into your dad and I mentioned Saturday—only he had no idea what I was on about. So yeah, Adam, I know you know what I mean.” Really, Kim is surprised how even she manages to keep her voice.

“I..uh.. I...” He flounders and Kim’s anger rises.

“It’s a simple question! You had a reason for not telling him, so tell me it.” when continues to flounder, Kim snaps. “Or don’t. It’s okay. I know why—you don’t want to marry me.”

“I—what?” Adam stares at her.

“I knew this was coming, I guess. But just answer me this—why lie? You do realise I’m going to have to tell my mother this? My mother! And she might not be your mother in law, now, but she’s still my mother and god, I thought you’d care enough about me to at least not create another thing for her to hold over me. And what was your end goal, tell me that? What was you going to do, on Saturday, when you needed to explain why Bob wasn’t coming?” Kim rants at him, letting all her hurt and betrayal out.

“I, uh. I was going to say that he cancelled, for overtime?” Adam looks sheepish, his expression showing he knows he fucked up.

“So, let me recap. Instead of just saying you don’t want to marry me you: lied, ensured you’d break my heart, make me think your dad prioritised overtime over his son and his son’s fiancée and what? Was you going to ditch my mom and I, as well?” Kim had thought her last boyfriend had told her the most outlandish lie ever, that she had left those days behind her.

“I’ll admit, it wasn’t very well thought out. But, baby, I promise you, it wasn’t because I don’t want to marry you. I love you, I want to marry you. With all my heart, darlin’, I swear.” She has to admit, with his earnest he sounds, how genuinely distraught he looks, Kim almost believes him.

“If that’s true, then why? Why would you ever lie about this? What do you have to gain from it?!” She asks, desperation and confusion clawing at her voice. Adam runs a hand through his hair, and it takes a few seconds, with a lot of hesitation, but then he’s speaking, explaining himself.

“Because! Because I was scared. Scared that if you really got to know Bob Ruzek, and saw how rude he no doubt would be to your mom, that you’d realise what kind of man he is? That he’s a screw up and not a particularly good man—or dad, honestly—and that... I was scared that you’d see who he really is, and think I’m the same. That you’d jump ship before you got yourself locked in with the junior Ruzek screw-up.” Adam started off loud, desperate, but ends so quiet, so sad it immediately puts out the flames in her heart, and her heart twists and all what she was feeling fades away, her love coming back tenfold and she questions why she ever doubted him.

“Adam. I already know that. Do you really think I like your father? I’ll deal, because he’s your pops, but I know who he really is.” Adam’s head jerks up at her words, a look Kim has never seen on his face before appearing and she realises that he hasn’t quite understood.

“But Adam, Adam look at me,” Kim moves towards him now, gently resting her hands on either side of his jaw, making him look at her. “And I know who you are. I know you’re not your father, because you are not a screw-up. You are a good man. Today? My partner asked about my fiancé, and I was so filled with pride at even the thought of you because I know exactly who you are.”

Kim knows she’s going to have to spend time questioning why she didn’t think to hear Adam out first, she knows it as she says this and realises the answers to all the questions she’s been having lately doesn’t lie in her head, or in the mouth of others like Roman, or even in Adam’s actions that initially confuses her, when she doesn’t give him a chance to explain; the answers aren’t anywhere but in her own heart.

Because she knows Adam Ruzek, her fiancé. And he is a good man, a man who loves her, who would never hurt her. A man who loves her so much that after just a year wanted to make her his wife.

A man who’s not perfect, who’s flawed and human—just like she, and everyone else is. And that means his behaviour will hurt and be confusing, but that doesn’t negate what she knows is in his heart.

“Kim, darlin’. If that’s true, then why would you think I don’t want to marry you? It’s okay, I know I’m a screw up and that I’ve been on borrowed time to have even a bit of you.” Adam says, quietly, resting his forehead against hers and her heart aches, hurts, as she realises just how much he hurts inside, how little he thinks of himself.

And that’s when she knows she doesn’t care when they get married, or move in properly, or any of that—all she cares about is making sure he knows, for the rest of his life, that he’s a good man, a definitely not a screw-up.

“I thought it because I was being stupid. I got caught up in this whole thing, this rut we’ve been in. I probably put more stock in other’s opinions more than what I know in my heart. But, baby, I know now. I promise. I love you,” Kim gently tilts her head to kiss him, softly, on his lips. She used to think the most love was in the passionate, all consuming kisses.

But loving Adam taught her that it’s these kinds of kisses that show the most love. The soft, gentle but oh so filled with love, affection, adoration kisses. The only kisses done when you truly know someone, when you love them all the way down, deep into your bones, your soul.

And that’s how she loves Adam.

#burzek #adam ruzek #kim burgess #chicago pd #kim burgess x adam ruzek #chicago pd fanfiction #fuck bob ruzek #ree writes #ree's.writing

[sebastianstanbuckybarnes]

The Order Season 2 (SPOILERS)

2x01 

I like Blond Jack <3 

GABRIELLE DUPRES IS IN JACK’S BED?!?!

That goddamn powder 

“And you think all blonde girls are stuck-up skanks,” WOW GABRIELLE 

Jack. Is. Dancing. For. Cheer. Squad.

It hurt me to see all the Knights not know each other and be in the same area 

I don’t trust Professor Foley 

A guy’s body just burned with bright light - are we sure angels don’t exist in The Order? 

For reals though, who’s that witch in the corridor? 

I forgot Brandon was in the cat ornament 

Can I sAY i love Werewolves? 

 Deja vu, you say Hamish? I WONDER WHY. 

The Knights taking down those acolytes gives me so much satisfaction

 “Stuck-up skank,” Dammit Gabrielle 

Huh, a body disguised as a statue? The rogue witch? 

“Alien Superheroes,” Never change Randall <3

Jack transforming into his wolf form to get the others too is high-key awesome 

DID YOU JUST REMOVE THEIR MEMORIES AGAIN, ALYSSA?! 

OH, THANK GOD! I may hate you Alyssa, but thank you for returning their memories. 

KILL THE ORDERRRRR 

2x02 

The cleaning returnsssss

“Youthful optimism,” I say this again, Randall, never change 

Poisonous Kombucha - out of curiousity, why are people so obsessed by Kombucha?

More cleaningggg 

Andddd Vera just cleaned it up for them 

I love a good Star Wars reference 

THE ADEPTI 

HAM SANDWICH?!?!? RANDALLL

Randall awkwardly sitting there, my poor boy :( 

No, Lilith making Randall even more sad :(

Does Jack have two hides now?

PROFESSOR CLARKE RETURNSSS 

HAM RADIO?!?!? Omg RANDALL 

That remembering potion made everyone go temporarily insane. 

I LOVE PROFESSOR CLARKE, THEY DID DIRTY BY KILLING HIM 

DAMN! ALYSSA JUST KILLED THAT ELLIE TAYLOR WITCHY PERSON 

Jack being really sweet while Alyssa was upset just shows how wholesome Jack actually is after everything she did to him 

2x03 

HAMISH AND RANDALL. THE KISS AND THE ESKIMO KISS. NEED I SAY MORE?

LILITH AND NICOLE KISS TOO! 

MAGIC HEIST! 

Honestly, I get Hamish’s fear, I hate dolls, including ventriloquist ones.   

Hamish making cocktails is life. 

I had a feeling it wouldn’t work, mostly because it was only 20 minutes in 

I’VE SEEN FROM ENOUGH MOVIES AND TV SHOWS THAT YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND ANY CIRCUMSTANCES SUMMON A MOTHERFUCKING DEMON! IT’S COMMON SENSE!

Randall drinking milk is so wholesome and sweet 

Alyssa is now drinking the milk 

Zecchia looks like me from my goth/alternative days 

Can I say that I’m loving Lilith’s blue streaks in her hair? Looks awesome! 

AND SOMEONE STOLE THE ARTIFACTS 

2x04 

Honestly, Zecchia is all of us on Tumblr 

The Excidium sounds like a very bad thing. 

CAPTAIN SEAN RENARD IS EMPEROR ROGWAN?! 

aND aLYssa’s fears have been eaten 

Gabrielle deserved that punch but maybe not from Alyssa...Maybe Nicole? OR BRANDON?! 

Of course Vera knows that they have their memories back 

NO! HAMISH! RANDALL! 

SHE PUT HER HAND IN THE BLENDER?! 

hONESTLY, I like Alyssa without her fears, she’s so much more fun 

Alyssa saying goodbye to Lilith and Jack is actually really sweet, and made me hate her less... 

NO! LILITH! FUCK! 

2x05 

Brunette Jack returns 

Sending Jack and Alyssa, a werewolf and a broken witch, behind enemy lines is the worse idea ever - remember the necromancer incident? 

“Remember when she murdered Kyle,” I love Randall so much 

For some reason, I don’t trust these Prometheans 

Randall walking in heels and succeeding is making my day 

“Hold my purse,” RANDALL <3 

Hamish being an absolute gentleman and holding out his arm for Randall to hold onto as he walks - i’M LIVING FOR THIS

THat juice is having a weird effect on Alyssa - STOP DRINKING IT! 

A surprising team up between Randall and Gabrielle - I actually like it 

“Dear God, help us,” HAMISH 

I’m kinda shipping Orbin and Alyssa in a way

WTF?! THERE IS AN EYE IN THAT TREE! 

Jack writing SOS on his forehead to tip Vera off was genius 

2x06

CANNIBALISM! 

This is why you don’t trust Foley 

Alyssa is withdrawing 

FUCKING BLOOD ATONEMENT?!?!

THEY’RE TURNING JACK INTO A TREE AND ALYSSA IS JUST FUCKING STANDING THERE!? 

YES! YOU GO GABRIELLE!

Jack is still turning into a tree

Vera using their Egregore connection and her pain to her advantage - you go Queen! 

And Jack is now cured with no help from Alyssa whatsoever

Gabrielle having a concussion and Randall taking care of her is goals <3 

AND the Prometheans are dead

2x07 

Poor Nicole :(

ALyssa is clearly not coping well

Hamish mentioning Cassie :( 

Invoking Privilege = Beer Pong  

Lilith is going to kill the boys for joining the Order 

Orbin lives on Campus?! 

I really hate Kepler - can someone kill her?

I really don’t like Alyssa or Salvador 

I love Vera messaging Hamish for a drink 

KARAOKE! <3 

OMG HAMISH 

OMG VERA 

Dat KISS and SEX?!

ALYSSA! After sex etiquette does not include stealing their hair! 

Gabrielle slapping Jack is so dramatic of her but I love it 

But then Gabrielle has Randall’s shirt, so, I’m pretty sure they slept together? Or at least made out? 

Jack going werewolf at Angus because he tries to keep Jack out of the Temple is hilarious

VERA IS ALIVE! THANK GOD! 

Because Improvising plans always goes well, Jack 

Alyssa, you are very selfish for drinking that tea even if it didn’t work 

...How did Salvador choke hold a supposed werewolf against a wall? 

Clearly, Salvador is the leader and playing the long game 

Foley is eating a blue scarab? I wonder what that does... 

The way Vera asks if “everyone is okay?” when they drag Foley in but looks at Hamish the entire time who briefly smirks is everything 

I SWEAR TO GOD IF THIS IS ANOTHER ATTEMPT ON VERA’S LIFE AND SHE DIES, I’M SUING THE WRITERS! 

2x08 

Well, she’s alive

What exactly does Angus have against werewolves? 

I really hate Angus at the moment 

That poor man who I don’t know the name of..? 

Quarantining? How on point for what’s happening at the moment... 

Alyssa committing B&E 

Adepti walking in is very sinister 

A cameo from Ian Ziering playing himself 

And Salvador hits Alyssa with the sleeping spell 

TWO PRINCESS BRIDE REFERENCES?! YASSSSSS! 

Ew. You just ruined your white shoe, Randall.

FFS ANGUS! 

And Jason Priestley is a part of the Adepti too! 

THEY ARE NEGOTIATING COMIC CON APPEARANCES!

JASON PRIESTLEY IS DEAD! 

Kepler certainly changed her tune 

OMG! THEY POWDERED ALYSSA! 

Ian Ziering is now Jason Priestley?! 

So, Alyssa does remember because Salvador protected her memories with the Risotto

2x09 

And Alyssa has stabbed her hand

3 month time skip? 

VERMISH?! 

Randall and puppies <3

I still really hate Angus. Like he’s cute but also a dick 

Magistratus though, they’re moving up in the ranks 

Salvador cured a blind woman? 

“You’re like a little sister,” Did Gabrielle just get friend-zoned by Randall? 

“She kinda scares me,” Oh, Randall, all women should scare you :) 

More sex

Hamish having Vera’s lipstick on him. I CAN’T BREATHE 

The Plagues of Egypt. Pompeii. Tunguska. All caused by an apocalyptic eruption. Damn. 

I STILL HATE ANGUS. AND SELENA.

Hame-Burger Helper. Jesus, Randall!

Randall and Jack trying to pull a fast one on Hamish, but hurting Hamish’s feelings as well. Of course he would help Lilith, you nimrods! 

Plausible deniability! You’re failure in pre-law is coming in handy Hamish! 

Kepler’s eye is now lizard like? 

Alpha is in Salvador? 

“Does anyone have classes anymore?” Gabrielle speaks the truth! Why aren’t you all in classes? 

No, Gabrielle! YOU ARE BETTER THAN THIS! 

Vera and Salvador meet...this isn’t going to go well

Yes, Gabrielle! You are better than this! CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT! 

Wait, no! Midnight! I swear to god if you hurt her!

OMG! EW! But pretty cool effect of Vera’s fingers splitting open 

Vera using a gun rather than magic is awesome - shows human weapons work just as well as magic 

And Alyssa has disappeared...again. 

2x10 

“Simply slowed time,” Can time be slowed that simply, Vera?

 “Cut the head off a snake?” In the words of many Supernatural and Superhero based TV shows and films I have watched, two more grow back in it’s place. *Cough* HYDRA *Cough*. Just saying...

“She’s just waiting to make an entrance,” That basically sums Gabrielle up if we’re being honest! 

KYLE IS IN THE COLLECTIVE UNCONSCIOUS?!?! For real though, Jedidiah Goodacre making a brief cameo as Kyle is awesome! I love him as Dorian Gray too!

Goddammit, Alyssa! 

Gabrielle saying no to killing Jack is definite Character Development! 

“Bring it,” Gabrielle standing up for herself! 

“Open a passage to the demon realm,” Jack has finally hit the brick wall of oh god, this is all real? How is this all real? Jack only wanted to be a marine biologist 

Okay, yeah, Midnight is totally riding Gabrielle around while Gabrielle is going through hell in the collective unconscious 

Yaldson = Archaic; term for the son of a prostitute! I’m using that! 

Tartarus eruption almost killing the knights...

...But they opened a portal to hell in Timber’s locker

Fuck, Alyssa knocked out Hamish and paralysed Vera with that stupid necklace that Salvador used against her 

Randall chopping off the heads of demons that come through the portal <3 

Midnight collapsing as Gabrielle 

VERA DOESN’T HAVE HER POWERS?!?!?! 

Jack poking Gabrielle with a stick :’) 

gABRIELLE waking up briefly to tell Jack midnight wants to kill him before fainting again 

Midnight not killing Jack and going with Jack’s plan instead. Character development from Midnight! 

And Alyssa’s in the toilet 

So, they need a witch not an owl, how did she get them mixed up?

Randall making use of the powder on Nicole 

MAddox makes a reappearance?! 

Randall kidnapping Kepler. Probably killing her for the ritual! 

LILITH IS BACK! I HAVE BEEN WAITING HALF A SEASON GUYS! 

OH, NO! HOW DARE YOU! YOU MADE LILITH A DEMON?! ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?! 

oH, WELL, Alyssa got her just desserts! 

Randall burying a body again 

Oh, poor Gabrielle, she’s really upset and I’m upset with her. And Randall hugging her, I ship them so hard <3 

I’m shipping Vera and Hamish too but I hope Vera doesn’t break Hamish’s heart... 

And Jack carrying Alyssa with the Vade Maecum through the meadow and forest

with the song in the background...

MAGNIFICENT! 

#the order #the order season 2 #jack morton #alyssa drake #lilith bathory #randall carpio #hamish duke #vera stone #gabrielle dupres #nicole birch #zecchia #rogwan #elizabeth kepler #spoilers

[shannendoherty-fans]

People, November 9, 1992

Nobody's Pussycat

By Tom Gliatto. Photos by Neal Preston.

Ever Outspoken, Shannen Doherty Defends Family Values, Her Turf on Beverly Hills, 90210—and Her Rowdy Reputation in Hollywood.

THERE ARE TWO ISSUES TO BE CLEARED UP HERE. Both of them are dear to the heart of Shannen Doherty, 21-year-old star of Fox's Beverly Hills, 90210, the Aaron Spelling high school hit that is now in its third season, one in which Doherty's character, Brenda Walsh—who might be described as Gidget with attitude—will break up with that lean-hipped rebel, Dylan (Luke Perry). First issue: Why has Doherty—alone among 90210 costars and teen idols Perry, Jason Priestley, Jennie Garth, Tori Spelling, Ian Ziering, Gabrielle Carteris and Brian Austin Green—come to be regarded as "difficult"? Like, is she, in contrast to the feisty but fairly civilized Brenda, one of those women who rhyme with rich? Is she, as the tabloids have gleefully reported, impossible on the set? Is she a prima donna? Also: After hours, does she party too much? And where was she being driven, in those recent tabloid photos, by rapper Marky Mark?

Second issue: What has become of the youngest of her dogs, a rottweiler named Jake? Doherty has arrived home, at her three-bedroom house in Beverly Hills, expecting to find golden retriever Sally gone (her dad was going to slop by to take her to the vet's), but now only black Lab Penelope is here to greet her. And why is there blood around the hack patio? Unnerved, Doherty phones her parents. No luck. She calls the vet. Gets the machine. Perhaps this is not the ideal moment for Doherty to sit down with a visitor and size up that delicate first issue. She chooses an armless chair in the living room and takes out a cigarette. She smiles, but it is not a happy smile, and her fingers shake as the match reaches the cigarette. "Yeah," she says, exhaling smoke with her sigh, "you've really caught me on a good day."

"People think I'm a bitch," she says with a shrug. "There was a group of four girls at Torrance High, when; we film the show, and they walked by and said, 'Oh, what a bitch!' You can walk away from that, but you really want to turn around and say, 'Why?' " She can give you a couple of whys, actually. "The tabloids make up stuff," she says. "Somebody will call [the tabs] up and say, They're yelling at each other on the [90210] set,' and they will turn around and make it 10 times worse," Doherty says. And maybe, she reasons, the tabloids pick on her. specifically, because "I'm a strong woman. There are still some people out there who can't deal with that."

Aaron Spelling, whose company produces 90210, describes her as "the best young actress I've seen in a long time," and has no problem with Doherty or her manner. "She is a very honest person who wears her emotions on her sleeve," he says. "If you ask her a direct question, she'll give you a direct answer." For instance, Doherty isn't afraid to tell friend, costar and daughter-of-the-boss Tori Spelling if she's wearing the wrong blouse. "Of all my friends, Shannen is the really honest one," says Tori, one of the few 90210ers who talked about her. Doherty's comments are "all meant in the best way," she adds. "But I can see [her reputation] hurts her feelings a bit." If so, Doherty is not about to expose her wounded heart in public. And why should she? Her image hasn't hurt her endorsement power (she does ads for Gitano jeans). "I'm not saying I don't have my moments of bitchiness," Doherty says, not defensively at all, "because everybody has them. But it's never for no reason. I think that life is short, you should live it and be happy. I've always been a ballsy kid," she adds. "I know it pisses some people off, but isn't the end result much better?"

In fact, Doherty, who won her first series role when she was 11 (she played Jenny Wilder on Little House: A New Beginning), thinks her "bitch" reputation started with 1989's cull black-comedy movie Heathers (in which she was one of the three nasty title teens). Doherty says she let a behind-the-cameras player on that film know, in no uncertain terms, that she didn't approve of an extramarital affair he was conducting with an extra. "It was the first time I actually saw somebody take advantage of the extras," she says. "He knew I disliked him, and he was the first person to call me a bitch." In the past year, though, she also earned the enmity of prince of sarcasm Dennis Miller when she appeared on his short-lived talk show and embarrassed him by teasing him for not being at ease. (Her photo, tacked up backstage, was subsequently defaced with a devil's horn and goatee.) And would Peter Duchow, who produced her recent TV movie Obsessed, like to work with Doherty again? "How much are you going to pay me?" he asks. He notes that she was late to the set several times ("Professionals," he says, "make an absolute effort to be on time") but then clarifies: "Like a lot of talented people, she has mood swings. Hers are perhaps a lot more exaggerated than others. And any 21-year-old is difficult to work with. She has to learn some lessons that everybody has to learn." Then there was the headline-grabbing flap at this year's Emmys show. The day before the ceremony, Doherty dropped out of presenting an award with John Stamos of Full House and 90210 costar Jennie Garth. "She was a colossal pain in the ass," says Walter Miller, who produced and directed the program. There have been numerous explanations of that pain. Initially a spokesperson said that she was suffering from bronchitis. Miller, who refers to Doherty as "a barracuda," thinks she was unhappy that Garth was given the opening line of Emmy dialogue—even though Doherty would have announced the winning name. But Doherty says she was upset that the entire 90210 cast was not given tickets to the ceremonies. "I just said, "This is ridiculous, our cast can't go,' " she explains. " 'I just don't understand that.' " Doherty's manager, Mike Gursey, says he yanked her from the telecast because "tiny" promises about her role, including what category she would present in, went unfulfilled.

Having offended the gods of Hollywood, though, the young "barracuda" arrived in tears al a luncheon the day of the Emmys, reports Aaron Spelling, "afraid even one would be mad at her." If so, it was a rare display of public insecurity from a young woman who, says her father, Tom, 48, "has always been self-assured." Shannen was born in Memphis, the younger of two children (her brother, Sean, 25, is a USC law student) and, on her mother Rosa's side, the latest in a long line of Southern Baptists. Shannen's conservative upbringing may have something to do with her public displeasure over 90210's Brenda's losing her virginity last year ("We have a whole cast that is sexually active," she complained in one interview); her disgust with that unnamed. womanizing Heathers crew member; and her August appearance at that feast of family values, the Republican National Convention, at which she led the Pledge of Allegiance. ("I don't think Clinton would be any different than Bush," says Doherty, a Jack Kemp supporter, "except maybe he'd do a hell of a lot worse.") Growing up in the male-dominated South, though, had its drawbacks. "I saw how women were treated," she says, "and I wasn't going to be treated like that." In fact, she seems to have a Scarlett O'Hara, I'll-never-go-hungry-again tenacity, developed after her family moved to the comfortable Palos Verdes neighborhood of Los Angeles when she was 6. Her father had bought a trucking firm, but within a few years the business collapsed. "Shannen has seen both sides of the coin," says her dad, now a mortgage consultant. "We lived in a prestigious area, with an ocean view. Then we had the rug pulled out from under us. There was a time when the doorbell would ring and it might be the utility man there to cut off the power." The experience seared Doherty. "People think, 'She's sitting up there in a nice house and has money,' " Shannen says of herself, suddenly irritated. "Somebody said that to me last night, and I got really pissed off. My parents went from having money to having nothing, to eating rice every single day."

As Tom Doherty's company was sinking, his daughter was getting into another business—acting. Initially, Shannen tagged along when Sean tried out for a church production. In short order, she went on to play Sneezy the dwarf in Snow White, also at church ("I hammed it up"), and by age 10 she was doing commercials for Pepsi. Her big break came in 1982, when she did a voice for the animated feature The Secret of NIMH. Then Michael Landon hired her for Little House. "That show changed my life," says Doherty. "Michael Landon was the one who said to me, 'Always slick up for yourself. Never let anybody walk all over you. Be a strong woman.' " The principal of the Baptist school she attended after her stint on Little House paid the price for Landon's advice. "I hated that school," says Doherty, her voice turning sharp again. "It was very repressed. They thought that dancing was evil, and I disagreed. I organized a big dance, and the principal called me in. He wasn't pleased. He had his Bible out there on his desk and told me how God would punish me. I flipped through his Bible and found references to people dancing and rejoicing. I said to him, 'It clearly shows they danced and rejoiced. Just what the f—is wrong with you?' " Her father had reservations about Shannen and show business, but he supported her in her fight at the school, which she left alter a year. She finished her studies at the Lycée Français, a private school in L.A. (by then, the family was back on its feet financially). "Shannen believed in something," says her dad, who didn't know beforehand about the prohibition on happy feet. "She did nothing wrong." The family was less approving when she left home at 18 and moved in with a 31-year-old boyfriend (who had told her he was 28). "I wanted so much to be on my own," she says now. "I wanted to prove I could do things myself". But the boy friend turned out to be involved with drugs. "And I tried drugs and drinking," says Doherty softly. "I was drinking up a storm. Cocaine was something that I tried and didn't really like. It was more the lifestyle I was into. Every single night I was out clubbing and drinking. It was a bad scene." This went on, she estimates, for six months and ended—with a shock—the night her boy-friend struck her. "I just remember one slap across the lace." she says, "and I was out of there." She went across the street to a convenience store, phoned her parents and went home. She has since bought and moved into her own place, but remains close lo her parents. She was there for her father in 1983 and again in 1990 when he suffered strokes (his right side is now slightly paralyzed). "She has done the single most important thing lo help my recovery," he says. "She makes me laugh." It was in 1986. while playing Kris Witherspoon on her second NBC series, Our House, that Doherty first caught the attention of an influential member of the viewing audience named Tori Spelling. Tori also liked Doherty in Heathers and recommended her to her father. Doherty got the 90210 job on a Wednesday, started work on a Monday, and now she's so famous she needs a dog to protect her when she goes jogging.

(The dogs! What about those dogs? Every time the phone rings, Doherty hops up and runs off to answer, only to return with a look of dejection—no news.) Doherty doesn't deny that she may have earned her reputation for being tough in the early days of 90210. "I always stood up for the right causes, but I don't think I was always diplomatic," she says. "But recently I have learned lo be diplomatic." That hasn't prevented the occasional on-set misunderstanding—like the time recently when the day's shoot ran past midnight and Doherty announced (with the producers' permission, she says) that it was time to go home. She suspects Jennie Garth may have resented that show of authority. "I don't think Jennie was very happy," she says. At any rate, she adds, their friendship has suffered—and the Emmy business didn't help. "There's some weird tension there," she says. "We haven't really talked about what happened. But Jennie is a great girl, and this is something that can be worked on." There are no complaints from Jason Priestley, who plays Doherty's brother, Brandon. "All of the stories about Shannen are so blown out of proportion," he says. "She's a very intelligent young woman who isn't afraid to speak her mind. I really enjoy working with her. We have a good relationship on-and offscreen."

For the past year, Doherty's primary offscreen relationship has been with Chris Foufas, 25, a Chicago-based real estate manager. They met through a friend of Foufas's (in fact, she was dating the friend at the time). They announced their engagement earlier this year, but now it has been called off. "He is a wonderful man whom I love very much," says Doherty, "but I'm 21, and it's not exactly the right time to gel married. Friendship has taken over the romance.' " Marriage hasn't been completely ruled out, she says. And "if he goes out with another girl, it's [only] because he's bored." Now as to the famous night on the town with Marky Mark. Doherty maintains that they were not on a date—it was just a friendly foursome that included 90210 costars Green and Spelling. Someday, Doherty may have her own rock-and-roll groupies to distract her. A big fan of U2, Guns N' Roses and Pearl Jam (she would love to meet lead singer Eddie Vedder), she enjoys toying with the idea of having her own band. The basic career plan, of course, is to land some movie roles alter 90210, but Doherty says, "I gel into these modes of sitting in my house writing poetry that could be converted into songs."

She pauses to light another cigarette and inhales, turning her head toward the sound of a car door slamming and the scuttle of approaching paws. Sally comes bounding in, and Tom Doherty enters carrying Jake, the dog's back paws wrapped in bandages. Shannen's father explains that when he arrived to take Sally to the vet, he found Jake in the pool. The pup had fallen in and was frantically clawing the pool trying to get out. "He looks so funny," Shannen says. "I'm so relieved!" She pats him on the head, and he regards her contentedly. You will never hear a bad word from Jake about Shannen Doherty.

*** 💜♀️International Women's Day♀️💜

#Shannen Doherty #Article #People magazine #People 1992 #1992 article #1992 magazine #1992 #1992 magazine cover #People November 9 1992 #1992 Quotes #Neal Preston #1992 Neal Preston #International Women's Day #Tom Doherty #Beverly Hills 90210 #Aaron Spelling #Michael Landon #Chris Foufas #Tori Spelling #Jason Priestley #Jennie Garth

[sunflowerspecter]

any moment, any time (a.h.)

summary: being in love is hard, in your line of work. you only hope you can tell him all of your feelings before it’s too late. unrelated, his brother is your best friend. 

warnings: yep, this part is angsty too... but there’s so much more fluff, i promise. 

pairing: aaron hotchner x reader (gender neutral) 

words: 2408

part: 2/2 part one

note: i forgot last part that if i italicize something on my doc, it won’t transfer onto tumblr. however, now that there are no italics last part, why start now? i’m sorry

Everyone took shifts waiting, while the others went back to the hotel and rested and recharged. You almost didn’t, because you wanted to be there for Aaron for every last moment, but Emily practically forced you to (you only ended up being gone for an hour, and then you fell asleep in the chair beside his bed).  It was your third day of sitting and waiting. Except for the daily hour in which the team forcibly removed you and made you eat and rest, you sat beside him for three days. You did paperwork on your knees as you sat there, waiting for him. You tried playing a game on your phone after the paperwork had finished, to not seem quite as bothered as you were, but in the end, it was three days of sitting, holding his hand, and waiting for him to wake up. 

On the rare occasion you were alone with him, you whispered things to him. 

“Wake up,” you said. “Please, wake up. I’ll fight for you, I will, until the day I die, I swear. I’ll never turn away. Just wake up.” 

“I love you, and I didn’t tell you, and I’m so sorry.” 

“I’ll hold you every single night, all you have to do is get better.” 

It didn’t ease your soul to say such things, but you hoped it eased his. 

Other times, you would sit alone with JJ. She also didn’t want to leave Hotch’s side, but not in the same way you did. 

“You know, he’s going to wake up,” JJ said. She was sitting across the room, by the window, one knee pulled to her chest. 

“I know that,” you said. 

“You’re staring at him like you’re trying to force life into him with your mind.” 

You shook your head as Rossi walked in the room, handing a coffee to both you and JJ. 

“No movement?” he said, sitting by the door. 

“Nope,” JJ said. Your phone rang, then— it was Sean. 

You stepped out of the room, just far enough that your conversation couldn’t be heard, but close enough that you could watch Aaron through the door. 

“Hey,” you said. 

“Hi,” Sean said, “How is he?” 

“No change. How’s Jack?” 

“He misses his dad.” There was a shuffle on the other side of the phone. “He wants to talk to you, is that alright?” 

Tears brimmed your eyes (how were you supposed to talk to your comatose boss’s son?) and you turned away from the room, but you said, “Yeah, of course,” nonetheless. 

“Ms. Y/n?” the boy's voice said, shaking. 

“Hey, Jack, how are you doing?” 

“I am worried about my dad,” he said quietly, and your heart wanted to burst. 

“He’s going to be okay, I promise. He’s resting, right now, but he’s going to get better.” 

‘Hey, if there’s anyone up there listening, please ensure that I did not just lie to a child.’ 

“I trust you,” the quivering voice said, and you broke. Hot, heavy tears down your cheeks, as silently as possible because you cannot let Jack know that you’re upset. 

“Hey, bud, it’s kinda late, right? I think your dad would want you to get some rest, yeah?” 

The boy yawned loudly. “‘Kay.” 

Sean was back on the phone, then. “Can you keep the promises you made him?” 

“I don’t know, Sean,” you muttered. “How are you holding up? He is your brother.” 

“I mean,” he hesitated. “I don’t want to lose him. What about you? JJ told me you were a mess on the ride to the hospital.” 

“You were talking to JJ—no, wait, of course you were.” 

“Well, plus, I mean, you’re in love with him, so I figured.” 

“I’m what?” you said, too loudly. A few nurses looked over at you, and you could feel JJ’s eyes on the back of your head. 

Sean laughed. “Come on, you’re my best friend, Y/n, I know when you’re in love.” 

“Wait, so you aren’t upset?” 

“Why would I be upset?” 

You sighed. Of course he wasn’t upset, you felt silly for even thinking he would be. “I’m in love with my best friend’s brother. That’s like, a high school trope, isn’t it?” 

Another laugh (at least you were getting laughs out of him. That had to count for something). “I suppose, but I’ve always marched to the beat of my own drum, haven’t I?” 

“That you have, Sean Hotchner.” 

“I gotta go put my nephew in bed, but you should call me later, okay? Love you, bye!” 

You smiled as the phone clicked off. Leave it to Sean to make you feel better in the middle of a very serious situation. 

Speaking of which, there was a commotion of noise behind you (a heart rate monitor was beeping rapidly). You turned and Aaron was awake, looking rather discombobulated. 

(“Is the team okay? Is Y/n okay? Here? Where?”)  

“Hey,” you said, walking in the door. He looked at you and his eyes softened, and JJ and Rossi froze. 

“See, I told you Y/n was right outside,” JJ said to him, patting his shoulder lightly. To you, she said, “I’m going to go get the nurse.” 

You and Rossi sat on opposite sides of Aaron as he gathered himself. 

“Everything hurts,” he mumbled, and it made your heart ache, so you grabbed his hand in yours and pressed a kiss to his knuckles. 

“I’m so sorry, love,” you said. “I’m so sorry.” 

“Is anyone else hurt?” he asked, looking between you and Rossi. 

“No, Aaron,” Rossi said. “We got the guy.” 

Aaron nodded, and JJ walked in with the nurse. “Let’s give the nurse some space, help me call the team?” JJ said, and you and Rossi nodded, standing. Aaron didn’t let go of your hand. 

“Stay?” he murmured, and you shook your head, kissing his forehead. 

In his ear, you whispered, “Tell me in the morning if you mean it.” 

And as you pulled away, he gave you puppy-eyes (he was very obviously very drugged up) and you blew him a kiss. 

JJ elbowed you as you stood in the waiting room. “So, you and the boss-man?” 

“You sound like Morgan,” you said. 

“I agree with JJ,” Rossi said, and you groaned. 

“Okay, but that’s how you’re supposed to act when people were just shot and are now really drugged up. Sensitive.” 

“Does sensitive include kissing him and calling him love?” JJ asked, smirking. 

Maintaining eye contact with her the entire time, you picked up your phone and dialed Reid. “Hotch is awake,” you said. 

“We’re still talking about this, later,” JJ said. 

~~~oOo~~~

He wanted to hold your hand. 

He was helpless in the eyes of the team, all surrounding him, but you could tell he wanted to hold your hand again. His palm was open toward the ceiling, right in front of where you sat. 

And, hell, you would have held his hand, if not for JJ, staring daggers (well, more appropriately, cupid’s arrows, because Garcia was fueling JJ’s matchmaking tendencies) into your soul.  

“When do we get out of here?” Aaron asked, clearly already restless after having been awake for less than an hour. 

“When the doctor says it’s okay,” Rossi said. “We’ll probably end up driving you back.” 

You could see the look of horror on Hotch’s face. “That’s like… a lot of time.” 

“About 28 hours, to be exact,” Reid said, and no one on the team said anything, they just smiled. 

“Well, sorry Hotch, but you’re on your own for that one,” Emily said, and you giggled, elbowing her knee. 

“I’ll drive with you,” you said, and he smiled dopely at you. JJ checked her watch. 

“It’s late, we should let Hotch rest,” she said. “He needs to get better so that hopefully he can fly back.” 

The team slowly said goodnight and filed out, save for you. 

“There goes me being in the field for a while,” he joked. You laughed halfheartedly, then sighed. 

“I thought I lost you,” you mumbled. “I was so worried, Hotch.” 

“I’m sorry,” he said, looking down at his hands, folded in his lap. 

“It isn’t your fault, not at all, love.” You dropped your elbows onto your knees and then your head into your hands. “Sean’s taking care of Jack, by the way. I’ve been calling with him. Jack misses you.” 

He glanced up at you, then said, “Is it too late to tell you I love you?” 

“Hmm,” you mused, grinning (and trying to ignore the blush crawling up your neck). “No, I think it’s okay if you tell me now.” 

“Well,” he said, and you could see him almost shying out of it, “I… I love you.” 

“Good,” you said, “because I love you, too.” 

He smiled at you, a big goofy grin, and you stood halfway, kissing his cheek, and then pecking his lips. 

“Go to sleep, and we’ll talk in the morning.” You made to leave the room, but he stopped you. 

“Please stay?” he asked. “Just until I fall asleep?” 

You nodded, sitting back in your chair. “But only because I love you.” 

He grinned and closed his eyes as you ran a hand through his hair. “That feels nice,” he said. 

“You know what else would feel nice? Sleeping.” He laughed, and you pressed your finger against his lips. “Go to sleep, my love.” 

“Do you promise to come back?” he said, opening his eyes. You practically melted under his gaze. 

“I promise.” 

You didn’t have to pray to know you would keep that promise. 

~~~oOo~~~

“Remind me again why we do this when we could spend the evening by ourselves,” he whispered, pressing soft and sweet kisses against your neck from behind you, his hands on your hips as you set the table. 

“Because neither of us can cook and Rossi offered?” you said, turning around in his arms, kissing him quickly. He smiled lazily down at you, hair in his face. “And also because we promised to let them see you everyone once in a while while you’re on leave? We’ve done this every other week for the past six months, Hotchner.” 

“You know, we probably have time before anyone gets here,” he said, right as the doorbell rang. “Damn,” he muttered, and you stepped away from him, giggling. 

“Hey Spence, hey Emily!” you said, ushering the pair inside. “Emily, it’s unlike you to be so punctual. I expect this behavior from Spencer, but—”

“Spencer offered to give me a lift,” Emily said, shaking her head. You were going to shut the door, but a car pulled up and you recognized JJ’s car. She and Will stepped out, Henry in her arms. She set the boy down and he ran to you, and you bent down to hug him. 

“Jack’s in his room, you know where it is,” you whispered to him, and he ran off. 

Soon, your kitchen was full, Garcia and Morgan having a heated debate with Reid about… something, you weren’t exactly sure, JJ and Emily bothering Rossi while he cooked, and Will and Aaron discussing… crime, probably. Or children. 

You smiled, throwing an arm over Garcia’s shoulders. “I’m just saying that it would probably be cheaper for us to fly commercial,” Reid said. 

“Yeah, that’s not a conversation I want to have,” you giggled, and Garcia poked your side. 

“So, I know you said we’re not allowed to ask in the office, but how’s Hotch?” Morgan asked. 

You shook your head. “You ask about Hotch all the time; he’s doing fine. Getting stronger.” 

“He means,” Garcia sighed, “how are you and Hotch.”

“We’re good,” you said sighing, realizing you would have to tell her sooner or later anyway. “We’re really good.” 

The group of you moved to sit at the table, and Aaron sat beside you as everyone settled into chairs, squeezing your shoulder. JJ came in with the kids, who sat next to each other at the far end of the table. 

“So, Hotch, when are you coming back?” Emily asked the inevitable question. 

He shrugged. “Soon, I hope. I’m becoming domestic.” The table giggled, and you shared a look with Reid. 

“We miss you,” he said, and Aaron smiled. 

“I miss all of you, too, but we’re here now, so,” he said, and the conversation took three million different turns, then. 

After dinner, the group moved to the living room, where you all were set to watch a kids movie (about so-and-so who wanted to do something or other and then met so-and-so who inspired them, according to Rossi). Jack sat on your lap and you leaned into Aaron’s side, and across from you, Will, JJ, and Henry practically mirrored you. Morgan and Prentiss were sitting practically on top of each other, and Garcia and Rossi were being respectable and sitting normally, and Reid was sitting between you and JJ, holding the hands of Jack and Henry. 

Family. 

The doorbell rang, and Aaron looked at you, raising an eyebrow (who could that be?). You grinned and put Jack in his arms, running to the door.

“Sean!” you said, throwing yourself into his arms. “God, it’s so good to see you.” 

He laughed, hugging you back. “Good to see you too, stranger.” You pulled him through the door and into the living room. 

“Sean Hotchner, everyone, everyone, Sean Hotchner!” you said loudly, glancing over to see Aaron. 

Jack ran to his uncle, getting a hug, and Sean looked at you. 

“You didn’t tell him,” Sean said through his teeth in your ear. 

“It was a surprise,” you said in a smile. 

But then Aaron smiled and embraced his brother (being exclusively domestic for so long had made him go a little soft, having not had to go into work-mode in so long, and you absolutely adored him like this). “Good to see you, Sean,” he said. 

“You too, Aaron,” he said. Then Sean turned to you, and said, “I feel like this speech goes for both of you, now, as my brother and my best friend, but if you hurt each other, I’m going to hurt both of you.” 

You threw your head back and laughed and Aaron pulled you into his arms, grinning at his brother. “Not a chance.” He kissed your temple, and Sean made a face, going to introduce himself to Garcia and Morgan. “Thank you,” Aaron whispered in your ear. 

“Forever and always, love,” you said. 

“Good, love.”

hotch taglist (lemme know if you want to be added or removed)- 

@quillvine​ @winterscaptain​ @genevievedarcygranger​ @word-scribbless​ @angelsbabey​ @agenthotchner​

#aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner imagine #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds imagine #hot cheetos #hotch x reader #hotch imagine