#crab fics

[crab-instruments]

The Crime Lord’s New Groove Part 5

Master <Part 4 Part 6>

Pairing: Silco x GN Reader

Summary: You find that your boss, Silco, has been turned into a cat.

Warnings: none

a/n: I'm not dead, just listening to podcast about people with delusions of grandeur, and maybe that's where this story will end up.

Smuggling cat-Silco into his office was much easier than getting him out. It helped Sevika could glare anyone into submission, forcing them to look down at the ground while you carried the precious cargo that was your boss.

You and Sevika tore the office apart, searching for any clues. Random cursed objects, cat claws and whiskers used for a sacrifice, even Shimmer tainted catnip. There was nothing, though it’s not like either of you knew what to look for. Besides, neither of you spent enough time in the office to know if something was out of place.

The cat himself clearly had other things to do. You watched as Silco tapped objects around with mild interest, using some to test the gravity in the office. A small pile of trinkets and pens amassed on the floor as time went on. Every once and a while, Silco would sit his scruffy-looking ass down, tail wrapped over his front paws, and stare holes into you and Sevika. His look was bored, as if expecting to be entertained. Neither of you knew what he wanted, so he would go back to tapping objects.

“So, what you’re telling me is… you know nothing.”

Never taking your eye off a pen as it rolled under the desk, you responded dejectedly. “Well, when you put it that way, it sounds like I didn’t try. However, I think I’ve gone above and beyond the call of duty here.”

Sevika scoffed. “Right. You have no answers and no leads but you definitely deserve a raise.”

You groaned and swiveled your head toward the golden armed warrior. “It’s not like I was here when it happened and I already told you my suspect is—”

“A lady with no appointment, who said something, and left without anyone noticing.”

“Yeah so, I mean, that’s not nothing—”

“There are many ladies in Zaun, you moron, it barely narrows it down.”

“I’m not exactly an expert in therianthropy or shapeshifting. I work behind the bar most nights! Y’all don’t even trust me enough to do inventory, so I fail to see how this is remotely my problem.” You dug the heals of your hands into your eyes and sighed, annoyed at how unlucky you were to have been the one to have found Silco. “Do you remember what that old hag looked like, from yesterday? She was the last one you saw come in here, right? Could you describe her enough so I could draw her face and see if we can use that to ask around?”

It was quiet for a moment. You looked up to see both Silco and Sevika staring at you incredulously. Raising your arms in question, you glared back at the two.

Sevika huffed, “You can draw? I’ve seen your handwriting, it’s dogshit.”

Underpaid and underappreciated, you wondered why you even offered and why you were still here. You grabbed a pen off the floor and some loose paper, making room on the messy desk. The sketch of the woman’s face started out generic, a base for Sevika to go off of.

It was all going fine until a few lines started to get out of hand and the pen became difficult to use. You scowled at Silco, who was much closer and swatting the moving pen. Lifting the pen out of reach, you frowned, trying to convey your annoyance. No emotion showed on his face, only focused on his target.

A silent battle was fought between the two of you. Silco looked at you with defiant eyes. This was Silco’s desk, pen, paper, and office, and if he wanted to play with the pen, it was his right. However, you were trying to help make him not a cat and his little paws were interfering with that work. After a few seconds, you made your attack. You lifted Silco up, keeping him at arms length, and placed him on the chair all while ignoring the deepening scowl the scruffy feline gave.

“If Silco remembers what happened while he was a cat, he’ll kill you. Maybe worse.”

You sighed, “He’ll have to get in line. Just tell me what the lady looked like.”

Silco accepted his fate, stretching his claws into the seat of the chair, walking in a circle, and curling up into a fluffy ball.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

After pulling the details out from Sevika, which was more difficult than you could have imagined (like it was Sevika’s job to keep them secret and close to her heart), you had a sketch to go off of. When you had a moment to finally look at it, you were sure you messed up somewhere.

You turned to Sevika, the sketch outstretched in your hands. “Is this what she looked like?”

“Shit, that looks just like the woman. It’s almost like you’ve seen her before.”

Silco snapped his head up, eyes bleary from sleep, now alert. He uncurled himself from the chair to leap onto the desk for a better vantage point. A single paw tapped your wrist impatiently a few times until you laid out the sketch on the desk. Silco took a few steps back, taking in the portrait. His head tilted from side to side before he pounced on the paper and looked up at you, meowing in approval.

“Even Silco agrees.” You rubbed your face, giving yourself a moment to think. “Well, the good news is, I know who the woman is.”

“Really? Who?”

“My landlord.”

Seivka stood and started making her way toward the door. “Then what are we waiting for? Let’s get going.”

“Wait! But I live there! I can’t go accusing my landlord of witchcraft, she’ll evict me.”

“How is that my problem?”

You sputtered, thrown off kilter by Sevika’s lack of empathy. “Where would I live?”

Before Sevika could answer, Silco meowed loud enough to startle you both. He held his presence as if he was human again, demanding respect and attention. It was easy to forget how powerful he was when he looked so cute and fluffy.

“Silco will reward you for helping him, of course.”

Sighing, you considered the offer. Realistically, you couldn’t say no to Silco anyway. “Fine, but let me talk to her first. I’ll try to negotiate nicely and if that doesn’t work, you can be the bad cop.”

The golden armed brute looked toward that cat sitting on the desk, waiting for approval. Silco sat up straight, regal as always, and looked between the two of you. He nodded and blinked slowly. It was a weird scene to experience, waiting for a cat to dictate the path of your future.

The same cat that started grooming himself on top of the desk.

“The boss has spoken, let’s go.”

Part 6

*~*~*

#crab fics #silco x reader #silco x you #lol silco #arcane silco #the crime lord's new groove

[crabsnpersimmons]

just wanted to say thank you for all the LOVE for Clip! he's happy to be here!

Clip is hella competitive 😅

and here are some doodles inspired by some of your comments and tags!

@nowiknowthislooksbad @normal-about-the-dca

he's having fun (: (the kind of fun i would hate because i don't like the sound of balloons popping..)

@vacantfields @petrixmuserb

i like to think the hair salon does these kinds of things for charity often. would you be in line? what would you pick?

@ramblingsofacotlfangirl @salamansir

oh dear..

@bennydunbar

loved this tag so i HAD to draw something for it--

oop well okay! i think that's enough for today! thanks again!

#fnaf eclipse #fnaf sun #fnaf moon #fnaf dca #dca fandom #fnaf oc #dca oc #New Do Same You AU #Clip New Do Same You AU #Sun New Do Same You AU #Moon New Do Same You AU #crab art #traditional art #bright colours #long post #i'm so glad y'all like Clip #he's such a fun guy #it was an adventure designing and creating his character #i hope you'll like him in the fic too once it's out #don't worry he's got his own baggage to deal with (;

[aelkitofsunset]

i just love svsss fanfics where Bing-ge meets his own Shen Yuan and just. undergoes bingmeification. he gets hit with the love beams that radiate from Shen Yuan and it’s all over for him. unparalleled.

#kit-thoughts #text post #svsss #like crab evolution #the ultimate form of the Luo Binghe is the Bingmei #i also enjoy fics that acknowledge that it would. in fact. be a difficult process #but the bingmeification speed run fics are just. so fun. #luo bingge #bingyuan #the luo binghe brainrot continues

[sea-buns]

desperate to know what crab mountain is so maybe it can tell me how i'm supposed to feel about this interaction

#thats either a drunk ill tell you when ive had enough 'break your fuckin spine' #or a :eyes: 'bitch get on the fuckin crab mountain' #idk man maybe the fics are getting to me lol #dimension 20 #d20 #fantasy high junior year #fhjy spoilers #fhjy #gorgug thistlespring #ragh barkrock

[g1ngerbeer]

Boots.

#my art #sw #tcw #star wars #the clone wars #obi-wan kenobi #anakin skywalker #ahsoka tano #don't tag as ship #screencap redraw #or at least the first one is #joke for two (2) people & the context will never see the light of day #CRAB CORE FIC CORE

[denaliwrites]

Horrible Things

Tenth Doctor x GN!Reader

Summary: The Doctor notices you like to cuddle the crab plushie he got you, so he decides to get you another one. Sequel to Cute Things.

Requests: Open!

Warnings: The most horrifically realistic crab plushie ever.

Tag List: @nyxiethesimp

"You -- you get that thing away from me!" you whined as you backed up into one of the seats by the console. Carefully, but simultaneously in something of a panicked hurry, you crawled on top of it and perched precariously. All the while, you had a finger pointed menacingly at what the Doctor held in his hand.

"What?" he asked innocently. "What's wrong with it? I thought you'd like it!"

You wagged your finger at the object he held. "That is evil! Cursed. Possessed by the souls of every crab that's ever died by human hands."

"What?"

The barely contained laughter in just that one word only spurred you to press deeper into the seat. "You heard me, jackass. Now get it away!"

"Aw, but it's cute," he protested, turning the crab plush to look at him. "I rather thought you'd name it the CRABIS."

"The -- Doctor!" you whimpered. "It -- I'm sorry, but it's way too realistic to be cute! And where the fuck are its eyes!?"

He looked at the crab thoughtfully, turning it this way and that so as to examine it. "Huh. That's a good question," he admitted.

"Crabs have eyes," you said. "But that cursed crustacean has none!"

You could tell that the Doctor was having a great time with this. His lips kept twitching up in flashes of crooked smiles that he struggled to rein in.

"Eyes are the windows to the soul, yeah?" you asked.

"Sure," he agreed, his voice curious.

"Well, that thing doesn't have eyes -- and it looks soulless!"

"Hey, now," he said, managing to sound somewhat serious, "plenty of things don't have eyes but have plenty of soul --"

"But not that!" you protested. "That's some Chucky shit!"

"What--"

"That thing's gonna come alive in the middle of the night and kill me!"

"Now you're just being mean," the Doctor pouted, settling the crab neatly on the console. "Look at it. Harmless little thing. Cute."

You hissed, much like a cat, in the crab's direction before slinking off the seat and down the hall towards the bedrooms, also much like a cat.

You awoke that night to strange shuffling outside your door. Forgetting all about the events of earlier that day, you got up and opened it, expecting to see the Doctor. Instead, you were met with empty air.

You looked down the hall in both directions before shrugging and turning to close the door.

Just before you did, though, something caught your eye and you looked down.

Sitting just outside the entrance to your room was the little crab plush, and in one of its claws was a knife.

The scream that came out of you was loud enough to rattle the TARDIS. It echoed down the hall and the sound of the Doctor's jubilant laugh echoed back from somewhere to your left.

You picked up the crab and its knife and stared at it balefully. "I'm gonna kill him," you told it. "I'm gonna take this stupid knife and I'm gonna kill him with it." Though the crab didn't answer you, you suspected the Doctor heard you, based on the gleeful cackle you heard in the distance.

#tenth doctor x reader #tenth doctor x you #doctor who x reader #the doctor x reader #the doctor x you #reader insert #doctor who fic #doctor who fanfiction #doctor who #the doctor #david tennant #that crab plush is terrifying and the only reason it didnt give me nightmares is because i dont dream

[catofaurora]

just a silly doodle of silly OCs~

My Blurp and Heraldo the first from @locallygrowndaikon

#I was gonna say semi forgotten OCs but maybe Heraldo has emerged in that fic by now?? #crab walk #hellsyeah #cat of aurora #my art #skyblr #sky cotl #my sky kid #blurp #heraldo the first #ms paint

[crabofthewoods]

whose fuckin idea was it for alastor to fight adam. adam is one of if not the most powerful exorcist angel and the entire group was just like yeah sure. leave him to the random overlord. he can figure it out himself i’m sure it’ll be fine

#like no shit he got his ass kicked #husk were you trying to kill off your boss again #stop trying to get alastor killed you fuckers #(im kidding it was worth it for the whump fics) #hazbin hotel #hazbin #alastor #alastor hazbin #hazbin alastor #alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel alastor #thoughts of a crab

[higgsbison]

I have finished 10k+ words of a dramatic tale about Tyrants, Guards, Diplomacy, Stories, Shellfish*, and some Truly Terrifying Creatures that haunt it all

*the Damn Shrimp Conference may contain less on-screen seafood than pictured in this promotional material

#Discworld #havelock vetinari #lord vetinari #sam vimes #samuel vimes #my art #wish I wrote more live crabs in it I couldve found a way im sure of it #these are clickbait crustaceans #in the last pic I forgot Vimes' supposed to be in his horrible ducal uniform the entire time #fixed it here I feel it adds another dimension to the situation #my fic

[crab-instruments]

Snippet of a potential fic

Just This One Time

Teen Wolf x Supernatural crossover

a/n: It's been a long time since I've really written anything, even with ideas floating around. I've been rewatching Teen Wolf and it's my current, stupid obsession. Reading other people's fics, I kept thinking about how I would want a crossover to play out, but never finding one I liked. Hell, I don't even care about Supernatural but I found myself researching Polish rock bands for Dean and Sam's identities for a scene where Stiles would point out they can't say the Polish names right, so I started to just write. I don't know if I'll actually finish this but I am posting it more for myself as accountability (though if people like it, that would be encouraging). Not sure of a pairing and if there is one, it'll likely be pre-slash but Sterek since Stiles will be one of the main narrators.

Stiles knew something was up the moment he laid eyes in the two men dressed in suits, parading around the sheriff’s station as FBI agents. He didn’t need werewolf senses to know these two were sketchy. Sheriff Stilinski, his very cruel flesh and blood, had kicked Stiles out of his office when the two had arrived and introduced themselves. It was like the Sheriff didn’t trust his own son with information about high priority cases.

The officers in the room ignored Stiles as he sank quietly to his knees in front of the door, pressing his ear against the door. They were quite used to Stiles snooping and it was always better to ignore the teenager because dealing with him was much more work.

While he was uncomfortable in the position, Stiles didn’t dare move. He didn’t want to create any noise that could bring attention to himself, forcing the Sheriff to kick him out further. It was at moments like this he really envied his furry friends, unable to hear much through the door. The teenager focused a little harder and his efforts were rewarded.

Agent Ciechowski and Agent Ciesielski.

Stiles barely heard the names through the door but it was hard for him to mistake Polish names. Not with an abomination like his first name. Other phrases like ‘animal attacks’ and ‘claw related injuries’ seeped through the door. He couldn’t hear anything else though, as Deputy Parrish yanked him away from the door by the collar of his shirt.

“Hey! Hey! Don’t stretch the shirt out, man! Come on!” The sound of his sneakers squeaked in the bustling room and his arms flailed wildly as he attempted to stand under Parrish’s grip.

“Stiles, I heard the Sheriff tell you to go home, so you should get going. You’re already on thin ice.” Deputy Parrish was young, competent, and well acquainted with the teenager’s shenanigans. He heard enough from the Sheriff and observed the rest with his own eyes.

Stiles faced the deputy, trying to convey his uneasiness with the several expressions flittering across his face in seconds. His brain worked quickly to figure out how he could convince Parrish to help him. “But…! Parrish, don’t they seem weird? They don’t give off an ‘FBI’ vibe. Something is off about them.” To drive the point home, Stiles shifted his weight from foot to foot, uneasy.

Parrish considered the words for a moment, deciphering if this was Stiles’ instincts hitting the mark once again, or it if this was Stiles’ usual brand of bullshit and he was just trying to stick his nose where it didn’t belong. “Why do you think that?” He questioned, lowering his voice and leaning into the teenager’s space to make the conversation more private.

His mouth in a thin line, Stiles eyes scanned the room for answers. “Well, it’s just… I have a feeling.”

“A feeling?”

“Yeah. A feeling. Can’t you see it? About their…” Stiles gestured wildly with his arms, “everything?”

The deputy frowned, almost disappointed in the kid. He expected a better excuse. Parrish straightened his posture and put his hands on his tactical belt. “Go home, Stiles. I’ll keep an eye on them, and I promise, if I see anything suspicious—“

“You’ll tell me?”

“—I’ll talk to your father, the Sheriff of Beacon Hills and my boss, and I’ll share our concerns.”

An exasperated sigh escaped the teenager. Without Parrish on his side, there wasn’t much else he could do at the station. Stiles would have to go do research on his own, possibly give Danny a call and somehow bribe him to break the law again. Had Danny hacked the FBI database before? Maybe if Stiles presented it as a challenge, it could work.

Stiles made his way to his Jeep in the parking lot, but stopped abruptly when he saw a vintage car he didn’t recognize parked a few spots away. Beacon Hills wasn’t that big; he’d have recognized that car if he had seen it before. The only black, noteworthy car in this town was Derek’s Camaro. Therefore, this had to be the car the FBI agents rolled up in. Looking around to make sure there wasn’t eyes on him, Stiles pulled out his phone and took pictures of the car, making sure to get the license plate number to check out later. He noted that the plates were from Kansas and there was nothing signifying that this was a government vehicle.

The Jeep pulled out of the parking lot quickly, much on the teenagers mind.

Opening his laptop, Stiles typed in the first agents name, Ciechowski, into Google. The name sounded familiar, possibly from his mom telling stories of her Polish friends. When the results popped up, Stiles squinted. He wasn’t sure what he expected, but it sure wasn’t the bio of a Polish rock star. The band, Republika, sounded familiar but Stiles couldn’t place why.

Digging a bit more, he found the band’s website. Stiles opened the page and couldn’t stop himself from playing one of the songs, Bikini Death.

The staccato notes from the guitar played through his speakers and Stiles realized why he recognized the singer. The band Grzegorz Ciechowski was a part of was one his mom used to play for him when he was younger, to connect him with his heritage. She had told the story of how she saw them live once and cried when Grzegorz had died.

The memories of his mother ripped a scar open inside his chest, but he couldn’t stop now.

It all came together when Stiles read the names of the band members. One in particular stood out.

Sławomir Ciesielski.

The FBI agents had taken their identities from the Polish rock band. It was what Stiles needed to confirm his suspicions.

These two men were likely hunters checking up on the werewolf population of Beacon Hills.

***

Here's a link to the song, Bikini Death by Republika. There is a Polish version, but I like this remastered version. The title is a line from the song. Mamona and Psy Pawłowa were runner ups.

#crab writes #crab fics #teen wolf fic #supernatural fic #teen wolf #just this one time #wip #while self indulgent the fic will be semi realistic #supernatural #I'm writing this so it stops fermenting and poisoning my brain #also so I will stop listening to behind the bastards and hating people throughout history #snippet #stiles stilinski #teen wolf stiles

[crabsnpersimmons]

Dear Crabsie,

I have brought thou a gift to defend thyself against any fishy thoughts, especially those which bringeth with them sadness and disdain, have these items to fortify your mind :

Okay have a nice day 🫂✨💕💥‼️

Dearest Starrie,

I was so thrilled upon receiving your notice of such a thoughtful gift that my joy rivalled that of my passing exam mark! However, I was simply aghast to discover that your gift had fell victim to the capricious nature of my postal service! I was looking forward to disrupting the tender tranquility of my housemates with my sweet kicks, but alas, the universe deemed this gift too powerful—too dangerous on the wrong feet. I am unworthy of such a gift. I only pray that whoever has received such a paragon of personal footwear will give them the honour and care that they deserve.

Your Humble Jestie,

Crabs

meanwhile...

but where did the other shoe go?

#fnaf moon #fnaf sun #fnaf eclipse #New Do Same You AU #Clip New Do Same You AU #Moon New Do Same You AU #Sun New Do Same You AU #oooh some new (ish) faces! #wasn't planning to introduce them so early #but the fish slippers really did fortify my mind enough for me to quickly sketch out some character designs #which are really just based off the waiters at a cafe i went to the other day #they're the Moon and Sun from an AU i've had on the backburner for a while #they're a fun bunch just maybe a little underdone right now #i promised myself i'd finish the New Do Same You fic first #and then these two will be ready to open their doors! #crab art #traditional art #bright colours

[dazais-crab-addiction]

Need to write a little oneshot where Ranpo gives Karl cotton candy and gleefully watches him dip it in water and even gives him more so he can just, keep dipping it and be devastated when it disappears. Meanwhile Poe is frantically trying to get him to stop because of how sad Karl looks.

Secretly this is 100% to make up for the fact my two ranpoe fics don't have Karl in them because I may or may not have forgotten to add him.....

#crab says words #crab writes fics #ranpoe #listen listen in my defense!! i was too busy focusing on the emotional turmoil and angst okay #i swear i love and adore Karl so so much #Karl centric oneshot in the future real not clickbait !!

[zeldathusiast]

While the fandom is on the topic of our favorite panels, here's mine:

Four's face here will never not be funny to me

#linked universe #four linked universe #hyrule linked universe #shoutout to that one fic I read where Hyrule's cooking SCUTTLES AWAY using the bowl it was in as a shell like a fucking HERMIT CRAB #i think about it every day

[crehador]

i am not immune to characters who are Strong enough to pick their grown man partner up like a sack of potatoes.........

#crab watches #buddy daddies #if you know how i write my Ultimate Blorbo #you already know this about me #i'm dafklsdjslfd #hm #this may require a fifth fic lol

[artaxlivs]

It's not everyday that you get excited that your friend gave you crabs but here we are! Thanks @doomcheese! I love them 😍 Here's a little drabble I wrote just for you because I think you might like creepy little creatures:

“Eddie, stop bringing me crabs.” “But they want to meet you!” Eddie says, excitedly shoving yet another tiny crab toward Steve’s face in his cupped palms. “Look how happy this little guy is!” The crab rears back, pulling itself down into a defensive position before charging a few little side steps and brandishing a claw like a little battle ax.  “Aawwww,” Eddie coos, “he’s like a tiny little barbarian!” It’s barely bigger than a quarter so Steve’s not cowed. He just sighs and points to the outcropping of rocks with their puddles of teaming tidepools.  Grumbling, Eddie takes the crab back, gently releasing it back where he found it. Steve watches him with a smile. He’d known that Eddie had never seen a beach before but his absolute joy upon discovering the tidepools had been a thing of beauty.  There’s a happy sounding squeal, much like the five year old who’d been here earlier, then Eddie is sneaking slowly around to another of the pools. Steve hears him mutter “roll for stealth.” And then he dips one hand into the pool.  When Eddie sits back up, he’s got a small octopus, no bigger than his palm, clinging to his fingers. The grin he turns toward Steve is all teeth and happiness. Steve wants to kiss him silly.  “Careful, they love shiny—“ the octopus slides off of Eddie’s hand and plops back into the water, probably nestling itself between some rocks or back into a little cave. “—things.” Steve warns too late, eyes focused on Eddie’s now empty middle finger. The skull ring missing. Throwing his head back, Eddie laughs gleefully, “So octopuses are rogues. Noted. I’ll guard my shiny bits next time.” Flashing another grin at Steve, he clamors over to the next pool like a toddler looking for trouble.

#stories for crabs #creepy crawlies #it's octopuses not octopi #steddie #steve harrington #stranger things #eddie munson loves creepy creatures #you can't change my mind #gift fic

[weepylucifer]

i wanna write a post abt how sad the crab man is, but my brain is so full of thoughts idk where to start

#posts by me #there's your pale acceleration believer right there. crab man. it doesn't get more glamorous than crab man #at some point my brain started looking at tiago through the lens of steban and at steban through the lens of tiago. and it is so #interesting and sad #i'm making them talk in my next fic chapter but it's not enough. it's just one conversation that serves a very specific purpose #i wanna do More with them in General