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#cause I can’t breathe without it
illshineforyou · 28 days ago
I love taylor’s version but there’s no gasp in ybwm and I’m feeling like I just lost a friend
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alloutshirt · 4 months ago
#hahaha i hate this so much#i avoided ranting abt my problems cause it’s a happy on my dash so ignore me#this is my dairy#i just hate how much i silently beg for my moms attention after she treated me like shit#i literally had a panic attack earlier and showed the symptoms i opened up about a few days ago like the scary physical movements i can’t#control and not be able to take a breath in and of course when im not having an episode she’s all listening and supportive#but then the ugly part of the illness shows and she gets mad at me#she loves to pretend she cares but as long as she doesn’t have to make efforts to help than i need to stop my drama#she fucking left me not being able to breathe in the car#it was this afternoon it’s now 2am and i haven’t left my room and she didn’t even check on my i haven’t eaten since breakfast and i could#hear her laughing like nothings going on#she always turns her back on the smallest inconvenience and it’s truly what a feel like#a weight on everyone’s shoulders#and now she came into the room saw me still sobbing took her stuff and left without a word#when we talked about how it hurts me that she never checks on me during episodes and she said she would just a few days ago#i hate to compare them but even if my dad never even did a google research about my mental illness and he’s clumsy and can be hurtful#at least he apologizes and openly says he doesn’t know how to help instead of acting all aware™️ but gets mad when the ugly side shows#id rather someone who doesn’t know what to do and what words to use but brings food till it gets better than someone goes#yelling then silent treatment then calls me darling in a sweet voice like nothing happened then that convo about making efforts only to#start the same circle at the next episode
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jennabonenna · 7 months ago
You ever just feel like
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#so fucking tired today my dudes#i feel bad for my dnd group cause I'm gonna be checked out#granted as much as I love dnd I always have a real hard time focusing on it for more than an hr without feeling suuuuper drained afterwards#which kinda doesn't lend itself to 3-4 hr sessions very well#I want to take a break from dnd after this campaign but everyone's very hyped for the next one so I know there's no way that's happening#I do love dnd it's just EXHAUSTING for me in a way I don't think it is for my friends#and I've never been an 'eat-sleep-breathe' it kinda person like a few of them are#Our campaigns are always fun but I'm also lowkey at a point where I miss the times before we played#when we had conversations about other stuff and did other things and casually hung out#I miss being a friend group and not an rpg party#I've kinda brought that up with them but everyone else wants to just do dnd so I'm outnumbered 🤷‍♀️#I really hope the next campaign isn't long#bc I would just sit it out but it's one friends 1st time dming for us and she'd be really bummed if I didn't play#and I've already done all the character setup and everything#so I can't just not play at this point lol#but hopefully it'll be a few months and not like a year bc I want to take a break from dnd soon#man these tags do make me sound like I'm not having fun lmao I am!#I'm just also very tired and dnd is a very high spoons activity for me#also it's really hard to do anything else together bc of quarantine so what can you do
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familiaanteomnia · 8 months ago
I just realized that I legit write Xavior with room to if I was lucky write him against a Nathan/without having it too already developed
Which tbh is slim odds but tis the dream (honestly just the thought of the whole dynamics to be had are so interesting)
#♥ ?i can’t breathe. 》 mun post#mobile#(Like seeing nathan first thing when goes outpatient to see him in the play and in comfy clothes that get changed out before going home)#(Or family dinner after the few awkward days and xavior just snaps at their father it gets yikes)#(So come early morning xavior is like gotta dip back to the hospital before anybody wakes up)#(But also just them at various points before everything or during lis1)#(Just maybe talking and distracting themselves from their sister and dad fightinf downstairs)#(Xavior deciding to paint his room for a change of scenery and the two gettting covered in paint)#(The awkward space of time he starts at blackwell and wants to interact more with nathan but steps forward only to step backwards)#(Avoidance in general a large part so nobody realizes theyre related cause neither of them need that or the family drama to be at school too#(Situations like where Xavior is getting high with Hayden and Nathan comes to bring some by)#(So Xavior just watches the exchange too out of it but still not enough and hoping to melt through the floor)#(Getting trashed at a vortex party and maybe nathan spots him half dead in the corner drags xaviors stupid ass back to his dorm room)#(Xavior developing a system to get things without going through Nathan or to frank but sometimes having to awkwardly reach out to nate)#(And he hates it everytime because maybe itll be shrugged or maybe theyll fight so he also keeps it to stuff like weed)#(Xavior having an episode where he thinks hes alone and he crumples to the ground but nathan is there)#(Likewise xavior just audiably stops breathing in a corner of a party and maybe nathans nearby cause victoria is non verbally reacting to it#(Xavior actually slipping Logan laxatives for being the biggest bully on campus and how he bullies nathan)#(Nobody knowing who did it and maybe they should cancel practice)#(Id die for the two of them and oh wow this isnt a fraction of potentional)#(Cause obviously most are elgible for everything from the fuck to fuck you etc)
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alexthedrummerboy · an hour ago
179 and flarrie ?? :))
179. I Believe by The Jonas Brothers
'Cause you show me something I can't live without I believe, I believe, I believe When you hold me, it's like Heaven coming down I believe, I believe, I believe
Flynn isn’t sure how she lived before knowing what it felt like to hug Carrie wilson, before knowing what it felt like to bury her face in the crook of her neck and just stay there for as long as she wanted, breathing in the scent of warm vanilla sugar body mist. 
It’s something close to a religious experience, getting to see her smile everyday. And the fact that that smile is often directed at Flynn? She can hardly believe it.
After so many years of pain and anger and insults thrown without thought, they’re finally together. And Flynn finally knows what it feels like to kiss Carrie without the hopeless feeling of guilt and shame that used to pile up in her chest.
"Flynnie,” Carrie asks one day, not taking her eyes off her magazine. They’re at the Wilson’s, lounging by the pool and not talking so much as just enjoying the silence together. “Do you wanna do this ‘who’s your boy band soulmate’ quiz with me?”
Flynn pushes her sunglasses up until they’re resting on her head. “Of course.” And soon enough, Carrie is reciting inane, shallow questions from her teen magazine and Flynn is answering them with a little too much thought and precision. 
It feels like when they were in middle school, giggling at each other under duvets, shining flashlights at magazines stolen from Flynn’s older sister and marking all the pages with cute boys (and girls, secretly) on them. 
The feeling is so familiar yet so new that it makes Flynn’s chest hurt. 
She can’t believe how lucky she is.
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peacepey · an hour ago
Hi! I hope your having a good day/night I was wondering if you can do an imagine where Marko shows the reader his vamp face for first time? And he expects her to freak out but she's saying that he looks really adorable and beautiful :) just some Marko x Reader moment (I love Marko❤️)
Hey hun! Sorry this took me so long to get to, I’ve been super busy! Here you go, I hope you enjoy it :)
You leaned heavily against Marko’s shoulder as you looked up at the stars above Santa Carla. You both gently swayed back and forth from your spot on the ferris wheel, at the very top of it, overlooking all of the boardwalk. Marko had been a sweetheart tonight, insisting on taking you on a good ole fashioned date without the boys, taking you out to dinner, winning you prizes from various games, and of course taking you on the ferris wheel for a romantic moment alone.
Tonight felt different, almost as if a puzzle piece finally clicked together inside of you. You had been seeing Marko for awhile, but for the longest time you had treated it like more of a friendship than a relationship. But as the two of you had grown closer you started to realize you held feelings towards him, and you hoped with the way that he treated you he held them towards you also. You decided tonight you were gonna admit your feelings towards him and just bite the bullet. You had stalled for long enough, and the space you were currently in that was between friendship and relationship was absolutely driving you crazy. It was now or never you decided, but that still didn’t help the nervous butterflies that erupted in your stomach as you looked down at the people below you.
“Marko, I gotta talk to you” You suddenly sat up from your position on him and crossed your arms in front of you, feeling vulnerable and scared. Marko sensed the change in mood and leaned away too, giving you some much needed room as you decided your next words.
“You’ve been talking to me all night.” He responded with a light chuckle, but you could tell he was also nervous as to what you had to say. You snorted at his lame joke and sobered yourself up again as you took a deep breath.
“Marko, I... I really like you, you know?” You said quietly into the night air, knowing he could hear your words from his spot so close to you.
You figured he was waiting for you to elaborate so you continued, “I just, I know we aren’t technically an item, but I-I think I’d really like that? If you-”
“(Y/N), stop. Just stop.”
Before you could finish the sentence, Marko was cutting you off abruptly. You stared at him shocked, the feeling of embarrassment and rejection causing tears to well in your eyes as you waited for him to talk. His head was ducked down, and he looked incredibly sad as he tried to avoid your gaze.
“(Y/N), I’m so sorry but we can’t. You don’t know me, don’t know what I am. I could never do that to you-”
Enraged, you quickly cut him off, seeing through the self-loathing bullshit he was pulling.
“Then let me get to know you Marko! That’s not a fucking excuse and you know it, at least give me a chance!” You seethed at him, angered that he was so quick to shut something down before it even started. You knew you guys had something, he would have to provide a hell of a better excuse if he was going to reject you.
“(Y/N), that’s not it, okay! It’s fucking complicated, I can’t just-” A scoff left your lips before you could let it as you rolled your eyes at his words.
“Complicated? Yeah right Marko, I’ve heard that line before-”
Before you could continue, an enraged snarl escaped Marko before he was suddenly crowding your space, lunging onto you in your corner of the ferris wheel seat, pinning you in place. You stared in shock at the face that was in front of you, the Marko you had known was gone. His eyes were a bright glowing yellow, his brow bone more prominent on his face as fangs extended past his lips. He stared you down, waiting for you to run, reject him, anything. 
What you did next, however, he could have never predicted, not in a million years. You stared up at him for a second, too shocked to say anything, before leaning forward and pressing a soft kiss to his cheek, and then tucking your head in his neck as you pulled him into a hug.
He froze in shock for a solid minute, before letting himself melt into your embrace. 
“Marko.. is that what all that was about? You’re worried I won’t like this side of you?” You asked quietly, not wanting him to leave your arms. You felt him hesitate, before slowly nodding, staying silent.
You sighed and pushed him back so he could see you, face to face. His vampiric features were long gone now, and he looked back at you with curiosity and guilt.
“I’m willing to love every side of you, no matter what. That’s how strong my feelings are for you. You are so.... beautiful to me, I will never be able to put it into words.” You assured him, already worrying that you went too far. You had let yourself be so vulnerable, and you were so terrified of rejection. 
Again, he looked down at his feet quietly as he seemed to ponder what you had just said, before you felt him crashing his lips against yours as his hand held the back of your neck steady. You immediately responded, relieved beyond belief. 
“I love you too, (Y/N), and don’t you ever forget it.”
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whispersatdawn · 2 hours ago
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on the rebound | jeong jaehyun social media!au | part 15
↳ In an attempt to finally move on from his ex-girlfriend, basketball star Jeong Jaehyun reaches out to Y/N, who he knows has a crush on him.
prev | next || masterlist
word count: ~2.3k
You continued to stare at your phone, waiting for a response from your date, but there was nothing. When the host had requested everyone to take a seat, you overheard the basketball coach ask some of the team members for Jaehyun’s whereabouts since the team captain was supposed to say a few words. However, no one recalled seeing Jaehyun after the group photo.
Being at the event alone, you felt out of place. You recognized most of players on the basketball team, but you barely spoke to any of them. Everyone chatted amongst themselves while you stayed quiet, occasionally taking sips of water out of nervousness. Maybe you were overreacting. Other than some of the alumni who had looked forward to engage in conversation with the talented athlete, nobody else really seemed to be concerned about Jaehyun’s disappearance. You looked at your phone for the nth time. Half an hour without sight of or reply from him.
As you continue to think of potential reasons for Jaehyun’s absence, you felt a hand on your shoulder, causing you to jump in surprise. “Woah there, sorry, it’s just me.” You glanced up at the owner and found Yuta, hair cleanly slicked back, dressed in a sleek black suit and bowtie. “Yuta, hey,” you breathed in relief, standing up to greet your friend with a quick hug before pulling away. “Sorry. I was just thinking. You look good.”
“So do you,” he replied, gesturing to your red dress. “I had no idea you were going to be here. I didn’t spot you until I was on the stage a minute ago.”
You blinked, glancing at the stage before looking back at Yuta. He noticed and grinned, slightly amused. “I’m guessing you weren’t even listening, ha. Yeah, Coach had me give a little impromptu speech last minute since Jaehyun’s nowhere to be found. Are you his date tonight?”
You nodded, sighing as you sat back down. “You haven’t happened to see where he went? I can’t seem to reach him. Am I getting stood up or something?” A small laugh escaped as you attempted a joke, but it quickly died down as the possibility tugged in the back of your mind.
“He wouldn’t do that,” Yuta answered seriously, giving a head tilt as if he was judging you for even having such thought. “This is one of our most important events. Even though the money tonight goes towards a charity, we still have to kiss ass to the donors so that we can receive donations for our own athletic funds. Besides, I don’t think he’d purposely miss this, especially with his parents in attendance.”
Following the flicker of Yuta’s eyes to the front of the room, you found an older couple exchanging dialogue with the rest of the guests at their table. Like their son, both Jaehyun’s father and mother stood out among others. They were good-looking, radiating confidence, and they held everyone’s attention whenever they spoke. You tore your eyes away from them as soon as you registered Yuta’s voice again. “How about this?” he suggested as he took a seat in the chair next to you that was meant for Jaehyun. “I know this you’re not used to these kinds of parties, so if it makes you feel more comfortable, I’ll sit with you until Jaehyun comes back. Okay?”
You noticed that waiters were starting to bring entrees out, and even though you were excited to eat before, you barely had an appetite now. You were grateful for Yuta because at least you were no longer alone in an unfamiliar setting. “Please?” you replied, mustering a smile as you accepted your friend’s request to stay. Still, as the night continued on, your hand kept a tight grip on your phone, holding onto the chance that Jaehyun would respond any minute. He went out of his way to invite you, and his parents were present. There had to be a reasonable explanation for him to step out. There had to be.
Jaehyun angrily loosened his tie as he pushed his way through the crowd in the  bar. As expected, when he approached the middle of the bar counter, Hyejin had a full shot glass in her hand. Jaehyun immediately seized the drink, handing the liquor back to the bartender. “Finally, you’re here!” Hyejin exclaimed, eagerly patting the seat next to her. “Join me.”
“Was there no one else for her to call?” Jaehyun asked, refusing to acknowledge the tipsy girl, directing his question towards the bartender.
The bartender shrugged. “I offered to get her an Uber or something, but she begged for me to look through her contacts and call someone named ‘Jaehyun.’ I’m guessing that’s you.”
Jaehyun closed his eyes, letting out an exasperated sigh as he rubbed his temples. At first, he wanted to ignore the call from Hyejin and pretended like he never saw anything. He was supposed to enjoy his evening with Y/N, replaying different scenarios of how he was going to ask her to be his girlfriend by the end of the night. However, when Jaehyun heard the bartender explain Hyejin’s situation over the phone, it did not feel right to just leave Hyejin in that state since she sought him for help. He also took it as an opportunity to let his ex know that this was the last time he would ever be at her beck and call ever again. Jaehyun checked the time on his watch, assuring himself that he would make it back to the charity event before it was over. “Get up,” Jaehyun demanded as he quickly pulled out his wallet and set down money for the drinks Hyejin consumed.
“No,” the girl refused adamantly, remaining in her seat. “If we leave, you’re just going to go back to Y/N. I don’t want that.”
“You’re better than this. Since when do you act like such a child?”
“Yeah, I’m fucking immature...” That was when Jaehyun heard a sniffle and noticed that Hyejin was crying, taking him aback. Hyejin buried her face into her hands as her cries turned into sobs, and Jaehyun felt awkward, hoping that there were not many spectators. Sensing it would take some time, defeated, he finally took a seat beside her.
Hyejin tried her best to wipe her tears, but they continued to fall. “I just want to fix things between us. Hyejin said in between her sniffles. “What can I do to make things right again?”
Jaehyun almost laughed but fought against it. He remembered how hard he tried to win Hyejin back after their breakup. The constant voice messages, the gift deliveries, the “coincidental” run-ins at social events. It was rejection after rejection, but he thought she was the one. He was willing to wait until she was ready to take him back, and he would have accepted her in a heartbeat. Yet, at the moment, she was doing exactly that, and he felt indifferent. “I don’t think we could ever go back to how things were,” Jaehyun admitted.
Hyejin scoffed, straining a smile, but it wavered. “So you choose her?”
“You can’t stand it when I’m with Y/N, but has it ever occurred to you that I felt the exact same way for the longest time when you were with some other guy? As much as I tried, I couldn’t really do anything about it because it was your choice, and you seemed happy. But what you’re doing right now is hurting Y/N and she doesn’t deserve it.”
“And what you’re doing isn’t?” Hyejin countered. “Have you taken a look at your own actions and considered that despite how much you reprimand me for getting in the way of you and Y/N, you never outright told me to stop? Why? Is it because you were trying to see whether your months with Y/N compared to your two years with me? And if she could not measure up, you would give me another chance and leave her? Maybe what I did was bad, but you...” Hyejin shook her head. “Don’t think you’re the good guy here.”
Jaehyun’s lips pressed into a thin line as her words hit him. Was that how he came off? No... that was never his intention. It was not like his feelings for Y/N were fake. She had to know that he did not think of her as some kind of replacement. Jaehyun stood up. “Come on. Let’s go. I have somewhere to be.”
Jaehyun tightened his grip as his head fell onto the steering wheel in dismay. He had the worst luck. “Fucking finally,” he whispered, sitting back up, pulling into the parking lot of the charity venue almost 40 minutes since he left the bar.
“Oh, look at that. You made it back to see everyone leave,” Hyejin said as she unbuckled her seatbelt.
Jaehyun rolled his eyes. “If I wasn’t clear before, let me make it crystal now. I like Y/N, and since we’re over for good, I’d appreciate it if you never call me again for something like this.”
The two of them stepped out of Jaehyun’s car. Jaehyun adjusted his tie and smoothed his jacket. As soon as he looked back up, he froze at the sight of you, and the look on your face broke his heart into a million pieces.
“Do you need a ride home?” Yuta asked, shoving his hands into his pockets as the both of you walked out into the hallway.
“If you don’t mind,” you replied softly, gaze on the ground. Two hours later, the event ended, and everyone was saying their goodbyes before heading home. Jaehyun was supposed to be your ride, but since he never showed up, you took Yuta’s offer.
Yuta sighed. “Sorry.”
You smiled sadly. “Don’t be. It’s not like this was your fault.”
You followed Yuta out of the building and towards the parking lot to his car. At the same time, you recognized a familiar car pull in several spaces across. You watched as the headlights turned off and the car engine shut down. The passenger door opened first, revealing Hyejin who also noticed you. Then you heard the driver’s door close, and when you looked over, your heart dropped.
The first thing you thought was that you should not cry. There were still people getting to their cars, and you did not want to make a scene. Anger. Disappointment. Betrayal. You didn’t want to speak to him. You didn’t even want to see him. So, cowardly or not, you would run.
The moment Jaehyun realized what you were thinking, he immediately started towards you. “Y/N. Y/N!”
“Jaehyun?” his father called out to him from a few feet away. “Where have you been? We’ve tried looking for you.”
But Jaehyun could not pay his parents any attention, not when you were picking up your pace to get away from him. “Y/N, please stop!” You almost opened the door to Yuta’s car when the door slammed back to a close right away. You turned around to find yourself face-to-face with Jaehyun, and your eyes started to tear. “It’s not what it looks-”
“I don’t care,” you said, cutting him off.
“Please. I’m sorry. Just let me explain.”
“No, let me explain. It doesn’t matter to me what happened because it doesn’t make me forget the fact that you left me for two hours on my own without a word. I am owed that much. I texted your friends, but they had no idea where you were. I thought you might’ve suddenly gotten sick, or that you were an accident... But this? Somehow this is so much worse.” You furiously tried to wipe your tears away. So much for no crying. “I had no problems with you talking about her because I thought it would help you get over her, but I should’ve known that you never really did. The pace at which we started getting closer, I thought you really liked me, but when it seemed like we would make our relationship exclusive, you didn’t. Her blatantly showing up to the game... the frat party...”
Your fingers ran through your hair as you paused, and the realization sank in. “Oh my god. I’m an idiot.” You met Jaehyun’s eyes. “I’m a rebound.”
“No, Y/N, that’s not-”
“I must’ve been such an easy target knowing that I liked you. Knowing that if you’d asked me out, there was no way I’d decline. Well, you got me. And it worked, right? I helped fill the emptiness, and because Hyejin wants you back, now the both of you can be together again.”
You felt sick to your stomach. Was that why his friends were acting so weird? Did Taeyong, Mark and Lucas know? How have these thoughts never crossed your mind until now? You watched as Jaehyun tried to take a step closer to you, forcing you to take another step back. “It’s not like I expected to be something serious with you, but I don’t know if I can get past you leading me on when I thought I was the only one you were talking to. I don’t want half of your heart, Jaehyun. I told you that if you didn’t want to be anything more, you could have been honest with me, and we would still be friends. I would’ve been okay with staying friends,” you said weakly. “Now I don’t want anything to do with you ever again.”
Your hand shook as you opened the door and entered Yuta’s car. You did not dare look out the window as Yuta locked the doors and backed out of the parking lot. He said nothing during the whole ride, and the car was mostly silent, except when you exhaled deeply, and then tears welled up in your eyes, and the suppressed cries finally flowed out.
taglist: @fluffyjaes @hwangful @seeking-faces @urlocalnctstan @justineasian @127-jaehyun @dearjaehyxn @taesty-jams @jeneyesmile @taeiluv127 @mango-bear @marklexleaf @generantionct @tyxsaturn @247byun @yourchasingsunsetslove @2000-september @jaeficrecs @bitchenderyy @thorscrown @leaurcitee @erisxczenie @minavenue @phoenixes-and-wizards @renjunf00ls @notminniie @sanisms @sunflowerhae @jeyyes @ohmy-fandoms @artfulbarnes @anotherfullsun @moons00 @nctlovesme @unmanageable-day @raywishii @thejungjaehyun @venusprada @doyobun @nshitae @andrea-chanel @llamabouquet @joeycheungg @tobiobb @wkhdery @itsdnguyenxoxo @ngayongabi @queen-of-himbos @beemarkie @jackyeongljin @seventeeneration @bdxxbi @joeokotoro @cacaubs @kwanseo @h1acynth @flwrtbz @jaehyunismine @alifethatsonlyonthepage @heheimsoft @m1ss-foodi3 @notsooperfect @ruthiechanumon @ukiyoneo @neo-teenkidz
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buttercup--bee · 2 hours ago
A/N: I am absolutely blown away by the reception the first chapter got. I honestly didn’t expect this to go anywhere, but I couldn’t help but write it since the idea wouldn’t leave my head. Thank you all so much for supporting it! I also want to mention, depending on perspective, the gifs will change from Javier to Sara! 
CH II: By Chance
Summary: Sara and Javier attempt to resolve the issue, instead they butt heads.
Pairing: Javier Peña/Sara Murphy
Warning(s): Mentions of drug-trade; mentions of death; period-typical sexism; mentions of sexual content;
Count: 2.8k ~ Masterlist ~ Ao3 ~ Playlist ~ Next Chapter
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They’re sent to Medellín on her first day. 
It comes in waves, the anticipation, her nervous fidgeting repetitive the entire flight there, even on the drive. It’s worse beside Javier, having no time to absorb the situation she’d stumbled into, at least not in private. Sara’s glued to his side without a choice, the entire way there is stuffy and uncomfortable. He hides it, but she senses it on his part as well. 
How he attempts to steal away looks, slips past her just close enough that he undoubtedly got a waft of her perfume, and his terrible act of nonchalance edges her further down a line - one of brittle hedge stone, creaking and shabby and ready to crumble. 
All she wants to do is scream, hit something maybe. 
The temptation grows when he grunts in doing something idly, whether it be rubbing his sore neck, twisting uncomfortably during your drive, or settling into his seat. It’s too similar to that night, or the same, maybe it is; she doesn’t want to remember. 
She’s relieved when they arrive at the motel just across the street where the Narcos are supposedly hosting a meeting. 
It’s the first time in recorded Narcos history that they adjoin in one, shared location. She does her best to focus on this. On the several vehicles that pull up to the hotel, those who trail inside without a care in the world. It’s annoying, a fixture of disinterest they wear. 
As if they aren’t the cause for millions of deaths. Something built in rage pinches at her sternum, Sara taking a light breath to rein it in. 
The situation uproots itself in malaise, just beneath it’s thimbles of anger, and her camera fits oddly in her grasp, heavier than she remembers it being. More so when she pends - unwillingly mind you - in just how exactly they learned this information. 
A bundle of regret, confusion, and irritation corralling itself into her abdomen. The rumors about Javier, and his preferred way to get information out of his CI’s, hits her uneasily. There’s a tingle of disgust laden there too, knowing she’d allowed a man who fucked just about every woman he could, inside her. 
Sara huffs, outwardly much to her embarrassment, and scoots towards the widow, angles herself left to get a better view. It was too late for regret, all she can do now is forget, move on, and focus on her job. 
In turn, she’s closer to the first Colombian head of the Search Bloc unit. He seemed kind enough, in that stoic sort of way. Though, she can tell her movement unsettles him. 
She can’t pin why, flinching when Carillo hisses, “Get pictures of that fucker.”
Quickly, she zero’s in on the very man she and her partner are after in full. Pablo Escobar. He steps out as if he owns the property, Sara flexes at the button of her camera. The distinct click of each shot she takes filling the room. 
He’s heavy set, black curls, a button up, and shorter than she thought he’d be. The man looks nothing like the pictures she’s seen. Here, he’s too human, too real, in her opinion.
An unsettling heat settles beside her, Javier pushing the curtain aside just a tad to get a view. His smells the same, bergamot hidden under a layer of smoke and liquor. It unnerves her, how vivid it is, vibrant and unwanted.
Memory upon memory flooding her mind in one snap-second. 
Sara ignores it, forces it far away, leaves it out to dry. It had no place here, none of those fictions of time do, and she refuses to let it affect her job - it already has, even in the smallest of ways. And its her first fucking day.
Biting the inside of her cheek when she casts Gustavo Escobar within her lens, she glares. Pablo’s cousin, if she remembers correctly, and his right hand man. He’s just as dangerous, not as reckless; perhaps the only man that Pablo listens to. That’s what is said, at least. 
Witnessing the amount of wanted men that trail inside the hotel, she had to give it to agent Peña. It’s because of him they’re here now, gathering intel, capturing faces to pair with names. 
When there is no one else left to wait for, Sara drags herself from the window, plucking at her camera as the two behind her speak. Annoyance leashes itself at her neck, building upwards until a rock swells there. It’s not that she doesn’t understand that angers her, it’s a sense of purpose. 
One meant to keep her out, a tall wall built of wire, stone, and thorned steel. They know she doesn’t recognize whatever they're saying, can’t attach one word to the next. They’re keeping her out, and it’s on purpose. 
She wants to wring them out for it, smack some sense into them. Why the hell is she here if they’re going to lock her out? Lost in thought, Sara doesn’t notice the figure inches from her, drawn well above her stature. 
“You get all of them?” the familiar baritone seeps at her, digs itself deep inside her person, memorizes the notch at the end. 
Sara turns to find Javier about a foot from her, arms folded, a questionable curl at his mouth. She’d laugh at the expression if it weren’t for her own concerns, remnants of the night before attacking her without remorse; how could they not, with him this close, broad shouldered and tall and looking at her with no intention of letting her escape. 
Those familiar bruises seem to beat with her heart then, from hip to thigh to ass, all of it thrums. Sara maintains her stoic composure, despite aching to touch them, trace over each blemish in wonder as she’d done last night. That awe isn’t the same anymore, she reasons then, knowing whose hands had marked her. 
The universe had to be playing a joke on her, why else would the very person she’d intended to meet once, be her partner? That same partner she’d be stuck with for however long it’d take to have Escobar behind bars. 
It’s more than subtle, the way he plays with his denim jeans, prodding at his pockets and belt. He must be skittish, even if he tries to hide it. It makes her feel a little better knowing he might be as nervous as her. It’s different having a full-faced view of these anxious ticks. None of which she caught a glimpse of beforehand.
Nodding, she allows the camera to lower itself from her chest, “Yeah, profile and forward facing,” Sara clarifies, “should be enough for Messina.” 
A moment passes, the atmosphere waging between calm and tense. Sara is certain it’s her, but the way Javier is standing, hunched in on himself, deep frown indenting his features; Sara can feel it within her person, adamant, worried, and those who occupy the shared space feel it too. 
“Could you give us a minute?” Javier asks, “We won’t be long.” 
Carillo huffs, orders his men to leave - she assumes, given she doesn’t understand him, but they all leave nonetheless. It isn’t long until they’re left alone, Sara refusing to meet his eyes, and the very man attempting to do so regardless. 
A pregnant pause is all that ties together their shared thread of anxiety. Javier, upon realizing she won’t meet his eyes, pulls out a pack of cigarettes, lights one up, and offers a smoke in her line of sight. 
Sara shakes her head, “I quit about a year ago,” she can’t hide forever, it isn’t in her. It’d be odd to refuse something as simple as eye contact if they were going to be working together. Finding his cedar blaise hue, he lifts a brow.  
He has no issue in slipping it back in it’s case, tucking it back in his inner jacket pocket. 
They both know what he wants to confront, though Sara isn’t sure she’s ready to approach the subject. It seems he’s going to regardless, no matter how she feels about it. 
“What happened last night,” he starts, jaw ticking, “I think it’d be best we forgot it ever happened.” 
That was the obvious way to go, but it’s easier said than done. Humming in agreement, she nods. Nothing else is said, only what happened lingers between them, an undisputed want tugging at her heartstrings. 
He leans back, inhaling heavy and hot. 
While he says nothing, he does take note of it, pursing his lips under the intense past night threatening to overwhelm them. 
Taking a drag from his cigarette, plumes of smoke slithering out into the open, he inclines his head towards the exit. He’s moving without thought, near leaving Sara behind. 
Urgency crawls up her spine, heart quickening, “I’m taking your word on that,” he halts, turning to face her, “if it gets out that we -”
“I won’t talk,” he assures, brows furrowing in a strained, near offended crinkle, “I promise.”
They’ve left her behind in search of Javier’s CI. He claims she needs to stay and keep a lookout, make sure if she comes back or not while they’re out. 
Sara gets it, she does. Even the smallest possibility of this woman returning sat in her stomach in a tight, unbearable knot. She didn’t need to know the CI to want her safe, to have her go home unharmed or for better, America. A new start, get away from people like them, people like Narcos. 
Yet a part of her fumes over their blatant discarding of her person. They’d looked at her like she was a nuisance in the predicament they’d found themselves. Someone to be tossed aside or sent back.
The way Javier had scanned her, uncertain, features drawn down in worry; it’d burrowed inside her. Questionable intentions aside, it didn’t numb the burn she’d felt at being told to stay put. She’s his partner, not a watchdog. Men were stationed here for a reason. To make matters worse, she couldn’t communicate with Carillo’s men because her dumbass hadn’t learnt Spanish. 
Then there’s the prospect of them having possibly been injured. What was she to do then? Sara isn’t there to watch their backs, to help and impede threats. For all the knew, agent Peña could be hurt, and she had no fucking clue to where they went. 
The duo hadn’t bothered to let her in on the plan, exploit any amount of information for her assurance, ignoring her shouts of confusion as they sauntered off. 
It was as if all her worries were crashing down on her in one fell swoop. What if this became the norm? Them rejecting her service, the very right she had to work the field, to be an active member of the DEA that mattered, at least in a way that mattered to her. What if they decided among the many ‘explanations’ - the very excuses she’s fought against since joining the DEA - meant they would keep her away from the action, apart from what she was good at. 
It was wrong and she wouldn’t stand for it. 
Tension boils until it nips at her chest, fumes red at her cheeks, nails pinching into her forearms as she awaits their return. What else can she do? Sara has already attempted to communicate with the officers at her side, and was turned away no matter what she did. 
Not that she could blame them, it wasn’t their fault she lacked the necessary knowledge to speak with them without problems. 
Heavens know how long she waits until she’s loaded up into the truck and driven to their new location. As she exits she finds an officer closest to her, anger flush on her face, “Where the fuck is Peña?”
He seemingly understands, thank god, and points her in their direction. Rounding another car, she finds them across the street, neither harmed. Despite her fury, relief floods her with each step she takes. 
Carillo see’s her first, Javier situated against a sidewalk rail, back turned to her. The head of Search Bloc nods to her in welcome, a cast of blinding white from the shop behind them creates a heavy shadow off their frames. Conceals Carillo in a dark cloud, while Javier illuminates under the thick atmosphere. 
When she halts within their half formed circle, she immediately catches sight of an ambulance, a woman being transferred inside it. Sara frowns, sorrow sprouting at her gut, its ever long vines slicing into her swollen heart. 
“Is she going to be okay?” Sara asks, genuine worry masking any irritation she’d had seconds ago. 
Looking in her direction, Javier takes a long drag from his cigarette, thinking. “Physically, yeah,” he begins, and Sara’s entire being plummets, “mentally, I don’t have a fucking clue.” 
He doesn’t need to say more for Sara to catch on, the near invisible insinuation vibrant and real in her own mind, an everyday concern she and women alike face. And that innocent CI had faced, what Sara has to presume, the worst of it. She can’t imagine the damage, gnawing at her lip in apprehending sympathy. 
Zeroing in on Javier’s features, Sara allows the moment to settle, because despite the tragedy she’d prefer to mourn, she needed to get a point across. Otherwise this, right now, would be the usual go about. She’d always be informed of the aftermath, never there in the present action.
“You left me behind on purpose,” Sara hisses, inching closer, brows furrowed. 
Javier opens his mouth, an excuse prepared she’s sure, and she wouldn’t let it see the light of day. Not now, not ever. 
“If we’re going to be partners, I don’t get left behind,” she’s in his space then, glaring up at him, an invitation daring he interrupt her, daring he try anything, “I didn’t come all the way down here to be put on the fucking sidelines.” 
Carillo bristles behind her, stunned into silence, even as Javier glances his way. When he says nothing, a frown evident in all his glorious shock, Sara twirls to face the head of Search Bloc. “You’re going to keep me in the loop,” before she can examine his amplified shock, she returns to Javier, determined to set in stone exactly who they were dealing with. 
Rightful rage prickles at her limbs, consumes her calm, “I’m in all the way, Peña,” she never leaves his eyes, pierces through them with an icy temperament to match, “is that understood?” 
A pause, a thoughtful glimmer in his cedar hue, and he finally steals his gaze away. Inhales his smoke down to the bottom of his lungs, holding it, allows the aftermath to flutter through the humid Colombian heat in the purposeful direction of her face. She’d smacked him if it weren’t for her stubborn need for dominance. 
“Understood.” He mutters, meandering towards the open window of the shop, popping two beers open, and takes his time in making his way back; offers her one expectantly. 
Sara takes it, it’s cold soothing to her clammy hands, her heart jumping when he leans down close enough to take in each little fault in his flesh. Crows feet and stress lines paint his tawny complexion, his expression twisting into morbid steel.  
“I hope you know what that means.” 
He’s gone from her, strained, Sara swigging at his proffered beverage. 
Sara isn’t naïve, she knew what it meant, Peña should have recognized that the moment he saw her in the US embassy. 
Noonan should be pliant, Sara thinks, while taking in the board she’d put together. It’s reasonable, no doubt about it, fixtures filling what holes her boss claimed there to be. 
She had to admit, she’d done a damn good job - each shot had the lighting, position, and clarity they needed to push this mission tenfold. Securing her sandwich in hand, humming happily to herself, she takes a bite. 
There couldn’t be a denial to their request now, one meant to push boundaries, have those fuckers cornered. At least, that’s what she was told by Carillo, not Javier. 
He hasn’t spoken to her since she’d confronted him. It’s been hours since then, the transaction still fresh, a pleasant cacophony made into proud enlightenment. If her declaration hadn’t gotten through to him, she had no issue ensuring it did, no matter the amount of times it took. 
Hopefully, that wouldn’t be necessary. 
It’s almost out of nowhere, the sensation of eyes on her, watching. Taking another mouthful of dinner, she pivots and finds Javier in the doorway. Guilt passes over his features, hesitant, then fades into astoundment, perhaps even beholden confusion. 
Studying her well jointed collage of photography, he wavers a moment longer, Sara tempted to laugh, that is if she had the energy. 
“Welcome to the Medellín cartel.” 
“Well,” he lingers, sighs, “shit.”
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jenosfreak · 2 hours ago
double team | nomin
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pairing: jeno x female reader x jaemin
genre: smut
tags: threesome, spitroast, orgasm denial, praise kink, dirty talk, degradation, creampie, oral sex, gagging, cum swallowing, finger fucking p.s. do take note that everything is fully consensual for all three parties involved
word count: 2.4k
* GIF is from @neotechs​ !
“Who the actual fuck chose this movie?”
You try your very best to maintain a blank expression even though you have been silently panicking for the past few minutes, uneasy from the extremely steamy scene being shown on the television screen at this moment.
The main characters of the movie you're watching with Jeno and Jaemin are currently in the midst of an intense kiss while the female lead is riding the male lead at the back of his car. The two boys are neutral — unbothered, even — as though there's absolutely nothing wrong with how the three of you are huddled close together on the couch while a heated sex scene is being displayed in front of all of you.
Clearly, Jeno and Jaemin are fully aware of how restless you've become because they are able to feel the way you have been quietly squirming as you press your thighs together, while trying to discreetly move away from the two of them. When you slightly lean forward to create some distance between you and the two boys by both your sides, they exchange a knowing glance as a smug smile builds on both their faces.
Jeno wraps his arm around your shoulder and pulls you back to the couch, causing your heart to start beating faster as your body comes into contact with Jeno and Jaemin again. As you try to regulate your breathing by slowly inhaling and exhaling, you force yourself to look at the screen ahead again. Before this, you never knew that the sound of another woman's moans could bring so much distress to you, face heating up as your throat suddenly goes dry.
“Is there something wrong, Y/N?” Jaemin sweetly whispers in your ear, feigning innocence as his hand moves to caress your arm, causing you to slightly jump up from the direct skin contact.
“Yeah, baby, why are you so tense?” Jeno also caresses your arm, making you turn your head to face him, who's already gazing at you with a certain look you could not decipher.
“N-nothing, I'm fine,” you lie, not wanting to admit how turned on you are as you immediately look away from Jeno, fixing your gaze on the ground because you do not want to make eye contact with either of them.
“Are you sure about that?” Jeno asks in faux concern once again. “I don't think you're fine, baby. Let me help you,” he coos into your ear, and without any warning, he then dives into the crook of your neck to start licking and sucking on your sensitive, tender skin.
“Ah, shit, Jen- Jeno!” you call his name in between loud gasps, shocked by his sudden actions which only makes him suck harder. “Jeno…” you whine, breathing heavily as your head starts to tilt to the side, feeling Jeno's teeth gently nibbling on your neck. The way Jeno is acting already makes you know where this is going to go.
Because sex with Jeno always starts with kisses.
Jaemin grabs a hold of your jaw to get your attention, and you can't help but to let out a small giggle when you see the slight pout on his lips, slightly upset that he has been forgotten. Your hands cup his cheeks, pulling him close to you as he crashes his lips against yours, though the kiss doesn't last for long because Jeno is lifting your shirt up as he attempts to take it off.
After your top has been removed with Jeno's aid, your lips meet Jaemin's again, while the other man continues leaving love bites along the outline of your jaw and your neck. The deep, intense kiss leaves you breathless, causing you to pull away as you try to regain control of your breathing, and that's when Jeno and Jaemin decide that they are done with kissing you. They both pull your shorts and panties down at the same time, thereafter removing their own as well.
With your legs spread wide, one placed over Jeno's thigh and the other over Jaemin's thigh, Jaemin's digits slowly go in and out of your soaking wet cunt, while Jeno rubs fast circles around your clit. Jeno is using his other hand to hold your quivering thigh down while Jaemin uses his other hand to stroke his own half-hard cock.
“I'm gonna cum, I'm gonna cum, please,” you cry out, pleasure spreading through your core as your hands grip tighter onto their thighs. However, instead of going faster on you, Jeno and Jaemin both pull away at an instant, making you whine at the sudden loss of contact.
“No, princess. Not yet,” Jeno laughs as he gets up and stands at the side of the couch, facing you and Jaemin who is already guiding you to get on your hands and knees. “Come here, baby. I want to have my cock in your lovely mouth tonight while Jaemin drills into you.”
You quickly nod as a shy smile forms on your face, not wasting any time in moving forward to bring yourself closer to Jeno while Jaemin adjusts his position behind you, pulling your ass back as he begins pumping his cock.
You reach out to hold Jeno's big, rock hard cock with both your hands, letting a string of your spit fall on its tip before you slowly move your hands up and down his length. You look up at Jeno, fluttering your long eyelashes at him as you give him an innocent gaze, only giving the head of his cock a few kitten licks. A small, playful smile creeps up onto your face when you see that Jeno does not look too pleased as all you're doing is swirling your tongue around his head, cock not even inside your mouth yet.
Jeno harshly grabs your face, forcing your head to tilt up to make both your eyes meet. “Tease me one more time and I won't fuck you for the next three months, princess,” he warns lowly, jaw clenched with darkened eyes as he gives you a cold stare. His deep voice, dripping with lust and desire, sends shivers down your spine while your pussy becomes even more wet with every passing second.
Being the obedient girl you are, you immediately open your mouth wide, letting Jeno's cock brush past your lips before he plunges into your mouth. At the same time, Jaemin also slams into you, causing you to jerk forward which makes Jeno's cock hit the back of your throat in a harsh motion. You immediately gag, some of your saliva dripping down your mouth because you were unprepared to have his entire length in your mouth right away.
“Holy fuck,” Jeno grunts, throwing his head back as he runs his fingers through your hair, clutching them tightly. While maintaining your breathing, you focus on relaxing your throat before you slightly pull away. Holding onto his thighs for support, you sink down onto his cock again, moaning around his length and sending vibrations to his throat. “Yes baby, just like that, yes. Fuck, fuck!”
By now, you are starting to get overwhelmed by the way Jeno is brutally face-fucking you while Jaemin's cock is slowly going in and out of you. The living room is only filled with all sorts of dirty, filthy sounds — skin slapping against skin, the wet, squelching noises of their cocks ramming in and out of your holes, the grunts and moans coming from the two boys, but you loved every second of it.
“Jeno, her little pussy is clenching so tight around my cock,” Jaemin's breathing becomes heavier as his hands sink deeper into the sides of your waist, still steadily thrusting in and out of you. “Her tight cunt feels so fucking good.”
“Oh yeah?” A huge grin slowly builds on Jeno's face as he witnesses Jaemin being in a state of bliss. He averts his gaze back to you before stroking your hair, pushing it away from being plastered to your face and neck. “Being such a good girl tonight, aren't you, Y/N? Do you like having both your holes filled up with our cocks that much?”
With your mouth stuffed full of Jeno's cock, clearly you can't manage to say anything, which only makes the two men start laughing as they watch you frantically nodding.
“Princess, I'm close, can I come inside you?” Jaemin tenderly asks for your permission as he holds onto your waist. Realizing that Jaemin needs to hear you saying it out verbally, Jeno removes his cock from your mouth right away. A string of spit connects your lips to Jeno's cock when he abruptly pulls away after repeatedly hitting the back of your throat, leaving you to let out a violent cough as you struggle to catch your breath.
“I'm on the pill, just come inside,” you plead, voice raw and hoarse as you reach out to grab his arm while turning your head to look at him. Jaemin merely smiles, bending his body over yours before he thrusts faster into you, chasing after his high. His hand moves to grab and squeeze your breast as he litters small kisses on your shoulders and neck. You can tell that he's already really, really close, so you clench your pussy tighter around his cock, and not long after, ropes of his hot, thick semen shoot into you, filling your pussy up with his release.
Jaemin jerks his hips into you a couple of times before he slowly pulls out, a few drops of his cum spilling out of you. You quickly clench your pussy so that there won't be any more spilling out, and you turn around to look at him with a smile on your face. His cum in you makes you feel so warm, and it truly feels so good.
He leans forward, bending over you as he gently places his hand on your shoulder. “You okay?” Jaemin whispers into your ear, voice filled with genuine concern and care, and you immediately nod in reassurance with your eyes squeezed shut. Jaemin gives you a light peck on your cheek and only leaves after he's convinced that you're fine, muttering a “I'll go clean myself” while telling Jeno to take care of you for the rest of the time.
You open your eyes again to see Jeno jerking his cock as he smiles down at you.
“You know? You look so beautiful like this,” Jeno mutters as he slides his hand up and down his cock one last time, collecting your saliva and some pre-cum on his fingers before bringing them to your face. You close your eyes when his wet fingertips come into contact with your skin as he smears those liquids all over your cheeks and nose, and when you feel his digits brushing over your lips, you open them again as you part your lips to give access to him.
“Good girl, such a good girl.” Jeno places his cock on the flat of your tongue before slamming it inside your mouth again. He bucks his hip up into your mouth and starts pistoning in and out at a crazy speed, fucking your mouth mercilessly to come as fast as possible. As you hollow your cheeks, your throat becomes increasingly constricted because of how Jeno's cock is pushing past your airway.
The sight of your red eyes brimming with tears and swollen lips shining with spit makes Jeno come in hot spurts with a loud groan just a few seconds later.
“Don't swallow it yet,” Jeno pants as he slowly pulls out of your mouth, before lightly slapping your cheek a couple of times and gripping your chin. “Open up, baby. Show me what's inside that filthy mouth of yours.” Hearing his words, you open your mouth right away, sticking your tongue out while forming a smile, which causes some of your saliva and his cum to fall out of your mouth.
“You're such a good cumslut, aren't you?” Jeno sighs, using his fingers to collect the mixture of liquids before pushing them back into your mouth. “Swallow.” You nod, swallowing all his semen right away before sticking your tongue out while grinning, showing him your empty mouth which is no longer filled with his hot cum.
Jeno smiles in satisfaction. “Good bitch, now lie down. It's my turn to pleasure you.” You comply right away, shifting around to lay on your back while Jeno also gets onto the couch as he softly laughs at your eagerness.
“Jeno, please, please!” you cry out, thighs trembling as your fingers grips onto Jeno's soft black hair tightly. He has been sucking on your clit and fucking his tongue in and out of your wet heat for the past minute, and you can't hold on any longer.
“Are you close?” Jeno asks innocently, fingers digging into your skin as he uses more strength to push your thighs apart. He laps at your folds again before plunging three fingers into your cunt right away, eliciting a loud, shaky moan out of you as he maintains strong eye contact with you. “Tell me, baby. Are you about to come soon?”
“Y-yes, Jeno. Yes! Please let me come,” you cry out, sobbing as you grind your hips against his face, desperate to reach your orgasm. Jeno scissors his fingers inside of you as he quickly thrusts them in and out of you, stimulating your walls with a terrifying focus as you continue to beg, mind fogged by arousal and the need to come.
At his command, you immediately come around his fingers, toes curling as your eyes roll back into your head from the overwhelming pleasure that Jeno is giving you. 
For a few seconds, all you could do is just stay still as you silently gasp for air, recovering from the mind-blowing orgasm.
As your high fades away, you carefully bring down your trembling legs while Jeno pulls his fingers out of your sore pussy. You stay idle for a minute or two, not having the strength to even move after getting absolutely wrecked by Jaemin and Jeno. Slowly, you place one foot on the floor, intending to go to the toilet and clean yourself up but Jeno presses your hips down, preventing you from getting up from the couch.
“What makes you think that I'm done with you?”
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reflectedreflectionz · 5 hours ago
9:31 pm
Pairing: Jungwon x Gender Neutral! Reader
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Comfort
Warnings: TW: Body insecurities, TW: Reader is mentioned to be more petite, TW: Mentions of not eating enough (This is not meant to glorify people with more petite or smaller bodies, or say that they’re better, it is meant to comfort anyone who is insecure about having a thinner body. I also have a comfort fic w/ Donghyuck for a reader who is insecure about being thicker in my “Comfort Series”)
Notes: Felt compelled because yes. I was going to self project a comfort fic with Jisung, but I wanted to write someone who I haven’t done a comfort fic with so yEAH +++ this was going to be more about ed but is now about body insecurity. Please know all of your bodies are so very perfect and beautiful, no matter what you look like 🥺 I love you all, and if anyone ever says anything to make you feel any less than loved, I’ll sock them in the jaw and give you a hug
Staring at your reflection in the mirror causes negativity to flood your mind, looking at your thin arms and legs with disdain. You’ve always wished to have a little more meat on your bones, hating your fast metabolism despite how everyone says you’re so lucky for it. Eating more, working out, eating more and not working out- nothing seemed to work. The constant comments about your body don’t help either, only sharp stabs to your already crumbling self confidence.
“Oh my gosh, it must be so nice to be skinny!”
“Do you eat enough?”
“I wish I had fast metabolism like you!”
It’s so tiring hearing it over and over again, those same comments or something of the likes. If only they knew of the inner turmoil you went through, constantly beating yourself up over it when you couldn’t really control it. You’re so lost in your thoughts that you don’t even register the door opening and Jungwon’s soft greeting. The tears in your eyes and your pursed lips make him immediately rush to your side though, gently turning you to face him. You can’t even say anything before you’re crying into his chest, and Jungwon wraps you in his arms while softly asking what’s wrong, sitting with you on his bed.
“Hey, hey, you’re ok... What’s wrong?” You’re trying to answer, but you can’t stop sniffling and covering your face. Jungwon just patiently waits until you’ve calmed down, patting your back and whispering soft assurances to you, occasionally reaching over to wipe your tears. Once you’re able to properly breathe without a new set of tears springing to your eyes, you tentatively explain why you’re crying, almost shrinking under Jungwon’s gaze. You’re scared of what he’ll say, scared he might agree with you, but you’re only brought back to tears when hugs you tighter and kisses your forehead adoringly.
“I’d love you no matter what you looked like, ok? It breaks my heart seeing you think you’re any less than what I see you as. You’re beautiful as you are, and I hope you know I like you for more than your looks too.” Jungwon continues to hold you, cradling you in his arms as you cry harder into his chest, clinging to the sleeves of his hoodie tightly. His words hit right to your very core, a calm to the raging sea of insecurities that plague your mind. Hearing someone say that, hearing them tell you that you’re beautiful no matter what, really just hit harder than you thought it would. You’re muttering soft “I love you’s” while trying to calm your breathing again, but Jungwon continues to patiently hold you and press kisses to your face. It makes you feel like you’ve got all the time in the world to thank him for loving you so unconditionally, and it makes you want to show him just how much you love him for that as well.
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twitterprompts · 6 hours ago
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starters  /  prompts taken from various songs .  feel free to change pronouns  /  tenses as necessary .
“ and i even maintained the illusion. “
“ i have no choice now but lose myself in an abyss of sadness and tears. “
“ i could lose my heart tonight if you don't turn and walk away. “
“ cause the way i feel i might lose control and let you stay. “
“ but if i take that chance right now tomorrow will you want me still? “
“ so i should keep this to myself and never let you know . . . “
“ why would you ever kiss me? “
“ but how could i hate you, you’re such an angel . . . “
“ we went for a drive, 2:30 in the morning i kissed you, it was pouring . . . “
“ how long i had to fight to be living my life . . . to get better and never have to try. "
“ not to think of you until you reached out and said, “remember that night?“ "
“ did you say the same shit you told me? “
“ did you cry to them while you lied by them? “
“ but constant reassurance can’t mend a broken heart. "
“ only if you didn't leave me so hurt . . . “
“ but tell me how to fix them when i have a broken heart? “
“ i bet that you call her when you're sober. “
“ that mistake is something of yesterday. “
“ guess i was in the wrong place at the wrong time. “
“ want my heart to be breaking? “
“ falling for her/him was like falling from grace . . “
“ and if you ask me i would do it again. “
“ nothing in this world prepares you for that . . . “
“ there's no regrets i just thought it was fun. “
“ i still remember the moment we met the touch that she/he planted, the garden she/he left. “
“ and i can still feel your hand when it touches my skin . . . “
“ and there's no one to blame but the drink in my wandering hands. “
“ forget what i said it’s not what i mean’t. “
“ what if im someone i don't want around? “
“ and i get the feeling that you'll never need me again . . . “
“ what if im someone you won't talk about?
“ trying to remember how it feels to have a heartbeat . . “
“ we’re just two ghosts swimming in a glass half empty. “
“ and i don't wanna make you feel bad, but i’ve been trying hard not to talk to you. “
“ tell me how to breathe in and feel no hurt? “
“ tell me when the light goes down that even in the dark we will find a way out. “
“ you never said that it would be this hard . . “
“ there’s gotta be a better way for me to say what’s on my heart without leaving scars . . “
“ am i the reason for your endless sorrow? “
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nastybuckybarnes · 7 hours ago
In a Heartbeat  -  Epilogue
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Pairing: Fireman!Bucky X Reader
Summary: You’ve always been careful with your heart. With your condition, you don’t exactly have any other choice. The last time you let someone in, you paid the price. A price you don’t plan on paying again. Until Bucky comes in and shatters your carefully crafted world.
Warnings: Angst, Language, Minor Fluff
Word Count: 1.2K
A/n: Grande finale! Oof plz don’t kill me but it’s so cute I loved writing this series so much and low-key I’m sad it’s over but it was so fun to write. If y’all have any ideas for anything you want me to write in the future, send em my way!
Series Masterlist
The wind is crisp, biting at the exposed skin of his face, his fingers.
He doesn’t mind too much though.
The sky is gloomy, like it might rain later in the day. The clouds are a deep grey colour and there's sorrow on the wind. He can’t help but feel like it’s fitting.
“I uh, I’m not sure what to say, I guess. Bonnie said it would be good to come swing by for a little while but uh I’m not sure if she was right.” His voice is shaky and he closes his eyes, hating the silence that meets him.
“I got you flowers. Didn’t wanna get roses cause it didn’t feel right, so I got you some carnations. Nat said that they last a while too which is nice. They’re real pretty. A light yellow type. Maybe peach is a better description of the colour but-” he cuts himself off with a laugh, shaking his head.
“Here I am, trying to describe the colour of the flowers to you when I’m sure you’ve got other things you wanna hear about.”
Deep breath in, deep breath out, just like the two of you always practiced.
“She uh, she turns two in a few weeks, but you know that. I don’t know if I can do it though. Not without you.”
A cold drop of water splashes against his cheek and it’s only then that he notices the warm tears falling down his face.
“I miss you, doll. Every day it feels like it gets harder, and Bonnie says that’s normal, but I don’t know. I feel like it should get easier with time.” He huffs a breath and squeezes his eyes shut.
“Doesn’t help that Beccs is the spitting image of her mom, that’s for damn sure. But you knew that from the first moment you laid eyes on her. You were all smug about it too, said you gave her all the good genes.” He chuckles softly and shrugs his shoulders, “you were right about that.”
He stuffs his free hand into his pocket, rocking back on his heels and trying not to break down right then and there.
“She’s beautiful, (Y/n). Absolutely gorgeous. She’s stubborn, just like you. Real talkative too. I asked Steve when to expect this kinda stuff but he says each kid develops at a different speed.” He clenches his jaw tightly, trying to swallow the lump in his throat.
“I miss you so fucking much. So damn much. I wish... fuck...” He stops, wiping away the tears and leaning his head back to allow the rain to clear his thoughts.
“I wish you were here. This whole ‘parenting’ gig would be a lot easier if you were here to do it with me. I feel like I can never do it right. And Beccs needs her mom. She’s got Nat, but she needs you.” He sniffles and wipes his nose on the back of his hand.
“I’m not saying this to make you feel bad, doll, I swear. I just... I can't keep it in. I feel like a failure. I need your help.” His bottom lip trembles and he makes the split-second decision not to hide it. No, he opens the floodgates and he lets the tears fall.
“Her uh, her favourite word is still ‘mama’. Got her sayin’ ‘dada’ though. And she absolutely adores Tommy. That’s her partner in crime.” He chuckles once, thinking about how the two interact.
A fresh wave of sorrow washes over him and he drops his head, looking down at the ground and letting out a shaky breath.
“I uh, I still can’t sleep in our bed. Steve says I should try but... I can’t. I need you there and I can’t sleep without you. I stay on the couch most nights. Nat gets worried but I think I’m okay. Yeah... I think I’ll be okay.” He lets out another pained breath then shakes his head and falls to his knees, eyes squeezed shut tightly.
“I miss you. I fucking miss you so much. And some days it just hits me so damn hard that I’ll never see your smile o-or hear you laugh. You won't be there t-to see Becca on her wedding day... you won’t hold your grandchildren... you won’t be there when she graduates and we won’t grow old together. No, you won’t see me all gross and wrinkled and old and you won’t tease me when I can barely lift my own damn body. Fuck, I’d give anything to have you back. I would give absolutely anything to see you again. I miss you so much and it’s so hard to live without you.”
He puts his face in his hands, shoulders shaking with sobs as he finally lets himself break.
And break, he does.
He shatters there on that gloomy Thursday morning, heart out for the gods to see, to pick apart. He bears his goddamn soul and he cries. He sobs and he all but screams out his sorrows.
It’s agony.
Living without you has been the hardest thing he’s ever done.
He’d lose his arm ten times over if it meant he could see you again.
When you died you took a piece of him with you, and he knows he’ll never get it back.
“I love you, Doll. So damn much. To the fucking moon and back.”
He kneels there for a long time, long enough for the rain to come and go, the sun peeking through the clouds and the birds emerging from their hiding spots.
He kneels there until his tears have run dry and his heart has stopped aching, his shoulders lighter even if the bags under his eyes are heavier.
“Daddy!” He glances over his shoulder, a wet smile spreading on his face as Rebecca bounds over to him clumsily.
He opens his arms and she runs straight into them, giggling madly and pushing her hair out of her face.
“Do you wanna give mommy the flowers this time?” He asks, handing her the bouquet of carnations. She nods eagerly, sliding out of his grip and gently placing the flowers down in front of the headstone.
“Love you, mommy,” she says quietly, pressing a kiss to the polished granite.
A gentle hand pats Bucky on the shoulder, and he looks up at the source.
Nat stands over his shoulder, a sad smile on her face.
“You’ve been here for a while. Thought we should come check up on you.” He nods, pushing himself to his feet and taking a deep breath.
“I’m okay now. Therapist said I should really talk to her, not just... lay down the flowers.” Natasha nods, pulling the man into a hug.
“We all miss her, it’s okay.” Bucky huffs out a breath, trying to fight the tears but they fall anyway.
“I want one too!” Rebecca exclaims, tugging on his pant leg. He chuckles and pulls away from Nat to pick up his daughter, holding her tightly to his chest and trying with all his might to keep it together, if only for her.
“C’mon. Let’s go get ice cream. My treat,” Nat says, ruffling Becca’s hair then leading the way to her car.
Bucky follows after, pausing for a moment and glancing over his shoulder, eyes tracing over the writing carved into the stone.
(Y/n) (Y/m/n) Barnes.
Beloved Mother, Daughter, Wife, and Friend.
Always on our minds.
Forever in our hearts.
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dragonninjafanfictions · 10 hours ago
The World Ends With You  ~ꕥ~ Joshua x Nova (OC) ~ꕥ~ Part 1/?
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Picture found where: Pinterest *Note: I always find my pictures either on Google or Pinterest, none of them belong to me*
I am seriously obsessed with Joshua right now. I always find it funny how he teases Neku.
About my OC: Name: Nova Kobayashi Hair Color: Black  Eye Color: right eye: Red   left eye: Rose Pink Skin Color: Peach Height: a little bit shorter than Joshua Age: one year older than Joshua Race: Draconai
 ꕥ • ꕥ • ꕥ • ꕥ • ꕥ • ꕥ • ꕥ • ꕥ • ꕥ • ꕥ • ꕥ • ꕥ
“What time is it?” I ask myself as I look at the clock only to see that it was almost midnight. I know that I wouldn’t be able to get myself to fall asleep until I know he gets back safe.
I get up from my bed, shivering as my feet meet the cold surface of the floor. I then make sure my bed was made before leaving.  I turn the handle with one hand, while my other was placed on the surface of the door to silence it from making any noise that would wake Mr. Hanekoma up.
Once I successfully open the door, without making any sounds I head down the stairs to the kitchen in hopes of finding something to eat. So while I was looking through the fridge I didn’t notice that I was no longer alone until that person spoke, “Nova what are you doing up?” I jump upon hear them speak.
I turn around to see Mr. Hanekoma leaning against the counter with concern filled eyes. 
“I couldn’t sleep so I decided to get something that will help me go to sleep, sorry if I woke you Mr. Hanekoma,” I apologize to him. He then gestures for me to come sit in the seat next to him I nod, once I sit next to him he asks me again.
I then decide to tell him what was really bothering me. “I am worried about Josh, he has never been late. I am worried that something might have happened to him.” I explain trying my best to keep my tears hidden.
I take a deep breath before continuing, “I can’t shake this feeling that someone is trying to harm him, and that makes it even harder for me to sleep.”
Mr. Hanekoma then gets up from his seat, I look at him trying to figure out what he is trying to do. It wasn’t until he set down a cup of coffee, I then thank him before taking a sip of the relaxing drink. 
I was about to say something but Mr. Hanekoma intercepts, “Joshua is strong he has been through tough times, so Nova you don’t have to worry” I just smile and nod taking another sip of my drink before setting it back down.
I stair at my cup seeing the ripples if the warm liquid as I recall some unwanted memories.
“Nova, come on it is time to head home” my mother calls me, I run up to her and my big sister. My mom’s name was Eclipsis and my sisters was Yuna, my mom had long snowy white hair that reached to her knees she also had scarlet-pink eyes. My sister had the same hair color as my mom, but instead of scarlet-pink eyes like my mom she had a pair of deep crimson eyes.
“Hey mom can we come visit again?” I ask her, we had come from our home where our dad lived to the home of the Draconai. She gives me a soft smile “we will see, you know it isn’t safe to come here that often because of the chance of him finding us.” when she said “him” her voice had so much venom in it made my body tremble.
I nod, she then turns to the stone structure and as she was about to open the portal for us to head back home it happened. One minute we were together going back home the next my mom is forcing us to go separate ways. 
That was the last time I ever saw my mother and sister, by the time I was able to travel though dimensions the dimension of the Draconai was gone.
I still remember the man that had caused that, he was the one I was worried about harming Joshua. Before I was sent through the portal to this world I heard his name, Beleth. even the thought of him angers and worries me.
I am brought out of my thoughts by Mr. Hanekoma heading for the door. “Don’t stay up too long Nova” he tells me before finally leaving to get some sleep.
Minutes pass before I decided to head back to my room to attempt to get some sleep, so once I finish washing my cup. I head to my room passing by Joshua’s on the way, I glance at his room one more time before finally closing my door.  I then head to my bed and lay down once my head reaches the pillow I fall asleep.
Well that is the end of the first part, let me know what you thought about it. So another note, Nova is actually the daughter of Muzan Kibutsuji and Eclipsis Kibutsuji, Kobayashi was Nova’s mothers last name before she married Muzan. The reason I didn’t add that last name is because one they are total different eras. Two is I wasn’t sure about having that last name yet, I might add it later on.
Also you may have seen the race that Nova is, Draconai are a species I thought of. If you want to know more about them you can read my book titled Draconai or you could read the story.
Well with that said, I hope you enjoyed. I also plan on releasing the second part today...I am not fully sure.
My work is also found here:
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Mud is Thicker then Blood: Test
Verse: ROTTMNT Fantasy Verse
Summary: Being a father is one thing, but also being a teacher is another matter entirely. Especially with a son as stubborn as Donnie
Characters: Leonard, Donnie, Mickey, and Danny
Pairings: Why are you like this?
Rated: G
Dedicated to: @star-boy-blue for all the amazing art you made us!
“Focus Donnie”
The fifteen year old in front of him rolled his eyes, but as a parent he’s used to that. Donnie brought up his bo staff again. “I am, Dad.” As he expected, Don responded with an attack. Whenever Don got frustrated, he’d always respond with physical retaliation. Len took a step back, avoiding the blow before forcing his way into Don’s space. The teen immediately got a flustered look on his face before doing a corkscrew dodge away. Len could see Don’s eyes shift to his left. The teen started charging to move past him when Len swept his hook staff out, catching him around the ankle. With a squawk, that Len struggled not to laugh at, Don hit the ground on his plastron.
Len couldn’t help but wince. ”You ok?” He stepped closer, kneeling down looking over his son's form with a critical eye. Other than some dirt on his clothes, there didn’t seem to be anything wrong. “How’s your leg?”
“It's fine.” Of course Don wanted to do things the hard way. He rolled away and back to his feet with his training staff in hand. A part of Leonard is proud, but he can’t help but sigh as he stood up. “Dee, you don’t have to do this. If you need more practice and training it's fine. No one will think less of you.”
The teen looked at him with what can only be described as exasperation. “No, you don’t get to decide when I’m done. After how many times you made me try ‘just one more time’. No, I’m not done till I say I’m done.” He spun his staff for a moment, probably to vent some anger before slamming the end into the ground and settling into a stance.
Len studied him for a moment. He knew that Donnie is determined not to fail today. He knew what’s at stake. “Then listen. When you bottle up your feelings you get clumsy. You lose your advantage. Just breath and you’ll succeed.” He slid back into a ready stance.
A moment later, Donnie was on him again. The two deflected each other’s attacks for a few moments before Don pivoted in his step. Bringing his staff up to swing at Len’s head. With more defense then necessary he brought his shoulder up to shove Don away before taking several steps back. Without breaking eye contact he reached up to test his ponytail to make sure it wasn’t undone. With that, Len couldn’t help but grin. A surge of energy went through him as his hand caught the incoming bo, his hand now traced with an almost translucent black flame that made Don give an offended noise. “No fair, you didn’t say we could use magic!”
“Come on, rule number one is sometimes you gotta make up your own rules.” Len freed his hand, allowing his kinetic magic to flow through his body. Don, who knew better at this point, bent his knees and jumped backwards. Len could see the gears rolling in his son’s head as Don decides his next move. Len shot forward to retaliate, causing Don to jump again with a furrowed brow when his levitation kicked in and allowed him to float further away and try to stay out of his reach.
Len was on him the minute he hit the ground with an almost inhuman speed. His son was able to deflect his blows but was forced to take several steps back till his shell was up against a tree. Len brought the hooked staff down from above as Don quickly blocked with his own. Len can see his brow is furrowed in frustration, struggling to come up with a solution to the problem. The part of him that is Donnie’s father, silently begged him to surrender. They can always try again later. The teacher in him begs his son not to give up.
Don suddenly released his bo staff and ducks away, the staff snapping to the ground causing Len to stumble. Before Len can move, Don twisted his body and gave him a kick in the ribs. The blow broke his concentration and he lost his kinetic magic as he held his ribs with one arm hand. “Nice hit,” he commented, even though he didn’t have a broken rib or even a bruise, it was enough to knock the air out of him. “It’s not enough to beat your old man though.”
Don grinned. “You said I didn’t have to beat you though.” In his free hand Don held up a familiar blue headband with a gold coin held between his fingers that made Len blink rapidly. He reached for his ponytail again, only to find that the headband he used to tie it back was replaced by a cheap, frayed string, that fell apart at his touch letting his hair fall in his face. He could only stare in surprise for a moment before grinning. “Yeah, I did say that.” He stood up. “When did you realize that’s where I hid the coin?”
“This morning I saw you putting product in your hair, which you wouldn’t have done unless you were worried something might fall out.” Donnie held up the coin. “This counts as a win right? I found the coin, stole the coin, all without you noticing.”
Len’s proud smile sank into a slightly sadder one, one he hoped donnie wouldn’t notice. “Yeah kiddo, you win.”
Barely a moment later, Mickey burst out of the bushes, flailing his flippers in the air “WOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO go cookieee!” He shrieked with glee before sliding over and wrapping the teen in a hug. “Your Uncle Mickey is so so proud of you baby Deeeeeeeeeeeee.”
Don gave a loud gasp as he struggled to free himself. “Yeah I know Uncle Mickey! Air, turtles need air! Gah!” He squirmed around but Mickey’s hugs are a power all in themselves and they both end up in a somewhat escape/wrestling match (escape for Donnie, wrestling for Mickey), Len grinned as Danny approached him. “Well, he won.”
“Only because you went easy on him.”
Len glanced at the wrestling nephew and uncle, thankfully too enraptured in their wrestling match to notice them. “Don’t tell him that. He’s my kid, I’m not going to go all out on my kid.”
“I know, you big softy.” Danny wrapped his arm around Len’s neck and pulled him into a side hug for a moment before Len gave him a playful elbow to the ribs and steped away, he brought down his hook staff hard enough to catch the two wrestlers attention (though Mickey had Donnie in a nonlethal head lock, Donnie had a grip on either side of Mickey’s cheeks and was now trying to stretch his face out), Len snapped his fingers with his free hand and pointed to the ground just in front of him. Mickey squirmed free and went to his side while Don stood up.
Hesitating long enough to take a deep breath and move closer, readjusting his hood as though it were a safety blanket. In almost a blink the confident teen who wanted to challenge the world around him was again wracked with insecurity. But, as Donnie stepped up, Len knew his neverending courage would never fail him. “Um,” Donnie started quietly, “I did what you asked. I haven’t snuck out, I’ve listened to everything you said, trained with you everyday, and I got the coin without you noticing.” Despite the anxiety in his eyes, there’s a glimmer of hope. “Do I pass?”
Len had always waited for this day with dread and excitement. He let out a breath through his nostrils before putting on a brave smile. “Yeah you pass. You can be a Mud Dog now.” Don’s eyes filled with excitement as he curled his hands under his wide smile, a strangled squeal started emitting from his throat that sounded sorta like that time Mickey drank that bottle of rainbow liquid that made him radioactive for three days before he stood back up again. Seeming to understand there was more Len wanted to say.
“You’ve earned it. I always knew this day would come, but-” he reached out and cupped the side of his son's face. An act most sons would have detested but Don gently tilted his head into the touch with a smile “-It seems like yesterday I found you, a tiny little child with not even a name. I’ve seen you grow, get better, get stronger, smarter. More stubborn.” He used his thumb to rub his cheek, “You grew up too fast for me kid.”
“Are you saying you’re old now?” Don said with a wicked grin, trying to alleviate the swelling of Len’s melancholy. But Len responded with an equally wicked grin.
“Not too old to put you in a corner you brat.” He reached up and pulled down Don’s hood, causing him to let out a loud laugh before adjusting it to his standards. Len gestured to Danny and Mickey, “Alright, these two softies said they wanted to give you something in case you passed today. So I’ll let them at it.”
The teen blinked and looked in between the two, “Wait, no you don’t have to-“ but Danny waved him off. “Come on kid, I promise it isn’t vegetables this time.” With a dark blush, Don ducked his face into his scarf, save for his dark pink eyes but didn't protest further.
Danny went first. “From me.” He dug into his pocket, and drew out a familiar silver old pocket watch that he held out. It was probably twice Danny’s age and the only thing on it that had been replaced in its time was the fine dark purple cord that would hold it to the user's form. Don took it with both hands, eyes widening. “Recognize it? It’s the same one you fixed for me when we first found you. Been running ever since. Took care of it so when this day came you’d have something from your favorite Uncle.” Danny ignored Mickey’s offended look in his direction. “And see?” Danny pointed to the outside of the pocket watch, “it even has our initials.” Referring to the giant D on it. “It’s the closest thing I can give you to a family relic.” Danny gave a shrug that he probably hoped to seem nonchalant but failed at the slight quiver to Danny’s breath. “Hopefully you’ll think of me every time you use it,” he said rubbing Don’s scalp over his head.
With that he stepped back and turned away for a moment, probably hoping no one would catch him quickly dabbing at his eyes with his sleeve. If anyone but Len noticed they gave no indication. Don looked at the pocket watch with a smile and glint in his eyes before putting it back in his pocket and looking over to Mickey as he squiggled forward. “Well from your ACTUAL favorite Uncle,” Mickey made sure to give Danny a pout (who had collected himself to turn back around) before turning back to Donnie, “I made this a while ago, and figured you’d make good use out of it.” He held out a dark purple bag. That, to an observer may have looked like a terrible gift but Don’s eyes widened showing how valuable it really was. “It’s an infinite bag, you can load it up with a ton of stuff and carry it with you like it was nothing!” He flailed his tentacles excitedly. “Just like what we have!”
Don took the bag with both hands with a look of awe before he smirked weakly, “There’s not a criminal in this right? I don’t want another Registration Day fiasco-”
“IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!!!” Mickey cried loud enough for nearby birds to take off, flailing his tentacles again dramatically. “An accident! I didn’t know Heinous Green was in it, I didn't!” He probably would have spent another hour defending himself had Danny not reached out and pulled Mickey back. “I know buddy, I know.” Danny said, pulling off his fedora and setting it on the eel’s head as a way to appease him. Which you wouldn't think would have worked except Mickey immediately deflated, his head sinking into his neck as he let out a sigh, feeling the brim of the silk fedora with a giggle.
Donnie let out a chuckle at his uncle's antics before tying the bag to his waist. He opened his mouth again, probably to thank everyone when Len held up his hand, “I got you something too. It’s not exactly new but I think you’ll enjoy it.” He swung his hook staff around. The moment Don’s eyes set on it he gave a loud gasp.
“I-No-Dad I can't, I can’t!” he protested immediately, taking a physical step back. But Len gave him a stern, but warm look that made him move back into place. Len let the staff rest in the palm of his hand as it returned to its handle form with a flash. “The Dragon Claw staff has been in our family for generations. Only a few of us have been able to use it to its full power. My mom, your grandma, was the first to use it fully in three hundred years. Then me, then you. The staff accepted you as part of the Yukimura family ever since it formed in your hands when you were five. When you wield this staff, it’ll be like me and your grandma are always protecting you.” He extended it out to him.
In that moment, he remembered watching his Mother train with this same staff. He remembered learning how to use it under a bridge, his only shelter from the snow and the only distraction from his hunger. And finally, he remembered a small, green hand, far too curious for his own good, reaching out and touching it, only for it to flash and form. Scaring the poor child for a good day in a half. It had only been when it formed again at Don’s touch (days later under the protective eye of him and Danny) that Len knew it had claimed Donnie.
Donnie looked up to him, only when he saw Len’s affirming smile and nod, did the fourteen year old take it. Cradling it in his hands like a sacred treasure. Len could see the tears form in Don’s eyes and was in a way grateful that his son understood how important a moment this was. He’s about to step up and console him when Donnie scrubbed his eyes on his sleeve
“Th-thanks you guys. Thank you dad. I know I wasn’t always the easiest kid in the world, but you never laid a hand on me or gave up on me. Even though we aren’t blood, I never felt like we weren't….” He took a breath, “Family.”
At that moment, the tables are quickly turned and suddenly it's Len with rapidly filling eyes that he can’t blink away. “Aw hell,” he said, wrapping his arms around his son. He could feel Donnie hug him back just as tightly, his smaller hands gripping the back of his jacket as though terrified Len would disappear from his grasp. “I’m so damn proud to be your dad,” he said, pressing his face into Don’s scalp after giving it a small peck.
Don’s muffled voice broke out from its place in Len’s chest. “Are you crying?”
“No!” Len quickly rubbed his face with his free arm to hide his lies before rewrapping it around Don. “Of course not!”
“Oh, definitely, he’s barely keeping it together,” Danny said with a grin that made Len promise to burn all his romance novels later.
“He’s going to cry big time,” Mickey added.
Len glared at them both, “You two are assholes you know that!?” He used this thumb to wipe his newest stream of tears away. Despite what he said, and despite the laughter, the two Uncles joined in the hug, holding them together as close as they could. The world saw them as thieves, as criminals. Wanted posters said three of them were unreformable monsters. But in that moment, and in so many more, he was a father. The luckiest Dad in the world.
They were a family.
They would always be a family.
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MORGAN LANDER Says There Could 'Absolutely' Be New Music From KITTIE In The Future
Morgan Lander says that there could "absolutely" be new music from KITTIE at some point in the future.
After the London, Ontario, Canada-based metallers completed the touring cycle for 2011's "I've Failed You" album, KITTIE entered a long period of inactivity during which the guitarist/vocalist focused on a marketing job for a chain of fitness clubs, while her sister, drummer Mercedes Lander, worked in real estate and more recently at a software company. The group also began work on a career-spanning documentary, "Origins/Evolutions", which finally saw the light of day in 2018 via Lightyear Entertainment in North America.
Asked in a new interview with Pierre Gutiérrez of Rock Talks if KITTIE is still "on hiatus," Morgan responded (as transcribed by BLABBERMOUTH.NET): "As of right now, yes. Since the documentary was filmed and has been released, there's been some changes. We are no longer a signed act. So if we were going to make new music, it would be released independently. But we do still have a number of legacy-type projects that we are going to be releasing and working on for the future. We love to be able to pay tribute to the things that we've done in the past. And I know that a lot of people are even just excited for re-releases of old stuff and whatnot. We're always looking for ways to reintroduce people [to KITTIE's music] and whatnot. So we do have a couple of things coming down the pipeline. I can't really give too many details yet, but there will be announcements and it will be awesome and it should be pretty fun. But no new music as of right now."
Regarding when KITTE fans can expect an announcement regarding said "legacy" projects, Morgan said: "I'm not quite sure, actually. It's still sort of in the development kind of stages, but it's just a fun legacy project that I think that certain people and collectors will be stoked about."
Morgan also confirmed that KITTIE is still very much alive, even if the band isn't active as a recording and touring entity.
"The thing is, especially for myself and for Mercedes, KITTIE is a part of our lives, and it never will stop being a part of our lives," she said. "Whether it's going into a deal to do some re-releases or the 'Live In London' concert that we did, or just digging through the archives to give people little snippets of the past. So KITTIE never will die because it lives within us still. We're still working on the KITTIE legacy, and we still live and breathe that every day. And so absolutely there could be new music. But I just don't think that — it's not the right time yet. But there's always a right time for everything, and I think it could very well happen."
Last October, Mercedes told the "Thunder Underground" podcast that there were no plans for KITTIE to reunite anytime soon. "I know that we're lucky to have the experiences that we have had," she said. And we had a really amazing time when we did that 'Live In London' show a couple of years, where we brought everybody back that wanted to come back. And we did like a 'travel through time' with all the different members and stuff like that. So that was really cool. We had a lot of fun doing that. But at this point, unless we got a really good offer… I don't think we would do anything unless it was a really great offer and we could include everyone, in one fashion or another. And I think because at this point, we're kind of one of those legacy bands, I feel like it would probably really help, or it would be really cool, if we could something with some of the past members as well. 'Cause right now, we don't necessarily have… I mean, besides my sister, myself and Tara, it's just the three of us, technically, in the band.
"It's kind of hard for us to continue on without Trish, because it would feel kind of weird not to have her there," she continued. "So there's a lot of stuff going on with that. But you never know what might happen. If somebody decides that they wanna give us a good offer, and it works out for us, and it's feasible for us and we're able to do it, I don't see why not. But at the same time, we wanna make sure that things are good for the fans as well. We wanna make sure that the people that are coming to the show are getting a good experience, 'cause it might be the last time. [Laughs] We don't wanna shortchange anybody and have a 'lesser than' experience, if that makes sense — we wanna make sure that everybody that comes to a show gets blown away. So we kind of have to outdo ourselves. But we'll see what happens. You never know."
Doan passed away in February 2017. The KITTIE bassist was only 31 years old at the time of her death.
Born in Gwangju, South Korea (about 270 kilometers from the capital Seoul), Doan joined KITTIE in 2005 and was in the band for two years before leaving in 2007 and then rejoining in 2012. She can be heard on KITTIE's 2006 EP "Never Again" and the 2007 full-length album "Funeral For Yesterday".
In early 2008, it was reported that Doan originally left KITTIE due to the eating disorder anorexia-athletica-nervosa, which she had been struggling with for almost two years.
Doan relocated to Australia in 2009 to get a degree and try to surf before returning to Canada in 2011. She apparently moved back to Australia in 2013 and kept an active Twitter account and Facebook page where she frequently posted about her life struggles and battles with depression.
"I've Failed You" sold 3,000 copies in the United States in its first week of release to debut at position No. 178 on The Billboard 200 chart.
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magioftheseas · 11 hours ago
Don’t End This Dreaming
For @badthingshappenbingo
Prompt: Bundled Up In Blankets taken from here.
Rating: T
Warnings: Suicide ideation and implied brainwashing. Angst. Not a good time despite what Ren thinks.
Notes: It’s based off the Missed Deadline ending from Persona 5 Royal! Which is pretty messed up but also known as the Sleeping Beauty ending. I thought this would be a fun take on it...and yes, I had a lot of Omori on the brain while writing...
***Alternate Ao3 Link***
Commission? Donate?
When he was a kid, his mother wanted to vacation by the lake. Something about the idea of watching those calm waters to bring her a peace that would help her think about things. To get it all together and clear her head of any unnecessary toxins. She was usually such a serious person, but even she dreamed of taking breaks from everything now and then.
“It’s important to pace yourself, Ren,” she had said with the kind of dry smile she had whenever she was forcing herself. “If you don’t take a vacation, you’ll just...burn out.”
Sometimes, she talked about bringing him to a lake house. Making his dad teach him how to fish. Laughing at the idea. Other times, she’d ask him in a small whisper if he wouldn’t mind leaving dad behind.
“He might need a break from us, too,” she’d say, and that dry smile would start to crack. “I’m just worried about the mess he’s going to make without us there to keep him on the straight and narrow.”
He’s not sure when he figured out that things were unstable, but had resolved himself to just doing the best he can. Not causing a fuss. Being quiet. Being polite. The ideal worker bee, his mother would fondly call him.
They eventually did go to that lake house. His dad went along, forcing a similar kind of smile. They took him to the lake where they watched keenly as he stepped into the water.
“Do you think about jumping in?” his dad would ask in a low voice, and he could only shrug helplessly. His dad laughed lightly. “Not much of a daredevil, huh? Definitely your mother’s kid.”
It’s not that he sounded resentful, but maybe he had sounded disappointed.
As Ren stepped further into the water, he would look back, expecting something to happen. His dad would wave, his mother still wearing her most professional smile. If he got far enough into the water, they still wouldn’t change much.
Despite that. Despite that.
As Ren floated peacefully on the lake’s surface, he dreamed about drowning.
He imagined this is what drowning would feel like.
Drifting. Drifting.
Sinking to the bottom with a gentle pull.
Everything getting colder, but as he sank lower and lower, his thoughts—his parents—everything would get further and further away. He didn’t have to think and he wouldn’t want to think.
He’d just lose himself in the calm.
In reality, drowning wasn’t a peaceful process at all. Really, he was just hoping for something like—falling asleep.
And never.
“Don’t worry. There’s no need to obsess over it anymore. I’ll bring you your happiness.”
It’s strange. For someone like him who never really thought about his happiness at any point, it was almost a relief to hear.
Even if he thought about it now, he’d decide he doesn’t need anything special or extravagant.
Just—contentment would be fine.
“Amamiya, get UP!!”
Akechi’s voice cuts through the fog with as much mercy as the man himself would spare for shadows. Gloved fingers dig viciously into the front of his shirt and yank with such ferocity that the seams nearly split open. It leaves Ren’s head spinning, his vision blurring as his eyes force themselves to open.
This. This is what drowning is actually like. It hurts just to breathe and he can’t keep a grasp on himself at all. He doesn’t even know if he wants to, he just would rather it all end—but Akechi grabs him by the shoulders.
“You can’t do this to me, you can’t,” he hisses, shaking him. “Amamiya, for fuck’s sake, you gave me your word.”
...what word was that?
It hurts to think. He doesn’t want to think anymore.
“Ren!” Akechi’s yelling again. Booming so much it’s like a storm disrupting calm waters. “Keep it together or I’ll kill you!”
Ren can’t help but giggle. Then, he’s smacked for that. It’s almost a shock. He sees his mother for a moment, but that image dissipates and Akechi’s glaring at him with such desperate intensity.
No, that’s not the kind of face she’d make at all.
Only Akechi could make his heart stir like this.
Oh, Akechi.
“It’s okay,” he babbles, slurs really as he attempts a low croon. He reaches for Akechi unsteadily to wipe away those unshed tears. Akechi quite temperamentally yanks himself away, out of Ren’s reach, which is enough to make Ren whine. “Aww.”
“What the hell is wrong with you,” Akechi mutters. “What the fuck did that bastard do to you?”
“You’re so worked up,” Ren mutters back even as it remains difficult to speak. Because it’s Akechi, he can push himself a little. He likes him, after all. “Come to bed with me.”
Akechi smacks him again. And again. And again.
It stings so much that it makes Ren’s eyes burn with tears, but whatever resolve that grants him is the kind that drives him to grab Akechi’s wrist. To cage it in the circle of his grip and yank Akechi towards him. Akechi, who stumbles with a curse and grabs the front of Ren’s nightshirt to steady himself.
“Ren,” Akechi murmurs, now, voice controlled but threatening to break in a way that Ren’s all too familiar with. “Ren, please, snap out of it. Whatever Maruki did to you, you have to snap out of it.”
Akechi’s trembling.
“That fucking bastard—I’ll kill him. I’ll fucking kill him.”
His mother would hate to be comforted, but Ren has no qualms about holding Akechi close. About rubbing his back and crooning into his hair. If Akechi tries to shove him away, then Ren will just wrap the two of them up in blankets, bundling them together so tightly that Akechi wouldn’t be able to escape.
“Akechi,” he sighs adoringly. “Bedtime.”
Oh, Akechi fights. Because Akechi is stubborn and spiteful and knows nothing else. But no matter how much Akechi screamed and begged him, it was fine. Even Akechi would tire himself out eventually. Everyone had their limit.
Once that limit was reached, there was little to do but fall apart. He was well-versed in that by this point. Why had he ever tried in the first place?
...there was something, wasn’t there?
But he’s so tired, he doesn’t want to think, and Akechi’s so warm. Perfect to snuggle and relax against, even as Akechi’s breathing grew strained.
Ren entwines their fingers.
It hurts. His face really hurts. The choked little sounds that Akechi makes sound like they hurt, too. Akechi lets out a seized up little gasp when Ren presses into him.
They’re so close. The blanket traps their heat. It’s like a nice little pocket from everything and everywhere else. Nice enough to doze in, even amidst all the hurt.
“Let’s not think anymore...”
The words are slurred, but Ren hopes that Akechi hears him before he tumbles into that darkness.
What is he forgetting? How long has it been?
When and how did Akechi find him?
Ren does stir awake briefly, but with Akechi tucked against him—what did anything else matter? Akechi finally looks at peace and the moment is only disturbed when Ren thinks that Akechi almost looks as motionless as a corpse.
But then Akechi breathes, and there’s nothing to worry about. Nothing at all. Akechi is with him. Everything is fine.
He doesn’t have to worry. He doesn’t have to think.
He can just sleep.
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elgringo300 · 11 hours ago
Day 10 question:) I love your dragons: were they the one who caused the storm? If not, what connection do they have to it? Do they have any connection to Aether? This is a bit of a stretch, but: could they travel to other planets? Feel free to tell us anything about the dragons!
Ok, so here’s how I decided to include the dragons. I had been thinking about putting some kind of monster in the Abyss, but thought that dragons were too on the nose and tropey. But then, I found this prompt on Reddit that went something along the lines of, “Every time there’s a thunderstorm, your father stands outside with a shotgun. Today, you found out why.”
And boom, the entire story was right there. It fit in so well with the rest of the universe, it practically wrote itself. 
Here’s a link to that story, so you can read it. It's not long at all, but it's one of my favorite things I’ve ever written. 
One question you might have is: Why doesn’t anyone know about the dragons in the story? And it is a good question. The answer is, because I wanted to preserve the tension until the end. I think I’ll just make that bit non-canon, because it's a little hard to explain how everybody is completely ignorant to the giant monsters that repeatedly threaten their home. 
Connection to the aether? Yes, indirectly. One of the titans is named Caorr, titan of the Abyss. All the titans have a physical form somewhere in the world, but in the case of Felenor, Lralso, Ildra, and the titan of love, I don’t know what those forms are yet. I do know Caorr’s form though: He’s a massive dragon. 
As Titan of the Abyss, he has control over all the dragons and over the Eternal Storm. The only reason humans know about him is because he had a paladin once, named Azor. The result was a massive war, resulting in the destruction of almost all historical documents, which is why nobody remembers Earth. That was just one paladin. That was also hundreds of years ago. 
So Caorr was the one who caused the storm, the one that destroyed the artificial islands and forced migration to the floating isles. I don’t know what limits his power has, or the power of any of the titans. 
More about the actual dragons!
They almost never leave the storm. I’m even considering making them unable to survive without it. So, yeah, they can’t go to other planets. 
They don’t breathe fire, but they can shoot lightning out of their mouths. They have no legs, because down in the Abyss, the air is very thick, and they can practically swim through it. 
The storms haven’t stopped though. They’re not nearly as big as the first one, but storms still come up from time to time. So everywhere that has any kind of government also has a Storm Guard along the coast. Galras has the biggest storm guard, which, to be fair is true of most things Galras has, to be fair. The storm guard is an entire branch of the navy, run by the infamous Captain Flucky. 
(Here’s a short story about Captain Flucky fending off a raid)
Endora has like a few private ships which are hired by the companies who run the port, as well as some guns on the port itself. Destra has no storm guard to speak of, given that the isle is currently fallen in anarchy. The dwarves don’t even have to worry about it, because they all live underground in their labyrinths.
And those are my dragons! 
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actlikeyoudidntdoit · 15 hours ago
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College Professor
-We all know that Altaïr has spent most of his life teaching, so what better job does he have than a college professor?
-He knows what he’s talking about, that much is certain, but sometimes he gets a little too lost in his lesson to realize that his students are scratching their heads. So it’s normal to have students staying after class, but they leave understanding every word of what he said.
-He’s not the fun teacher, but he’ll be able to teach you what you need and still remember it at the end of the day.
-He’s pretty lenient, and even with the obnoxious students who cause a scene, he calmly gets them to at least do their work.
-Other teachers always use him as a reference when it comes to the perfect teacher.
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-I can see Ezio being a public speaker since he’s not all that scared of crowds and spends a lot of time giving advice, so I think he’d really enjoy being able to help a crowd of people whose lives are falling apart
-Ezio would be the single anchor in a sea of storms because he always seems to have an answer for everything. He’s a man whose words are turned into inspirational quotes that people hang on their walls.
-When he says that things will be okay, no one doubts him since they know that he lost his father and his brothers very early on and that it took years for Ezio to accept the loss the way he had. If he could soldier through it, why couldn’t they?
-He doesn’t involve himself in politics, finding them to be a waste of time and breath despite how many people ask for his input on the political status of the country he’s staying in.
-He speaks to a lot of people in private, letting them speak their minds and giving his advice if they want it. He’s a therapist without a license, and you always feel hopeful about life leaving his office.
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Construction or Sports
-This boy was designed for heavy work, and I’ve heard some good points in saying that not only would he be amazing at sports, but he’d also really enjoy it too.
-In my personal headcanon, I think he’d be a good construction worker as well. Not the high end kind that build skyscrapers or anything, but I can see him building simple houses for small communities, taking the lower jobs that can’t afford much help like the sweetheart he is. He definitely volunteers to make houses for the homeless.
-Since most of the homeless he helps don’t have much money, he makes sure to offer them baked goods because he’s definitely a baker.
Edward Kenway
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-As a young man, he definitely joins the navy
-Once he’s on his own, he definitely buys his own boat and treats it like royalty.
-He’s not a pirate himself, but he does let less legal people on board for a price. At the time, it was just an easy cash pay since people paid good money when they were desperate.
-When he’s older and gets a grip on some of the people he’s helping (like the REALLY bad criminals) he quickly lets it go.
-Yet after seeing some of the more decent people and the places they were running from, I can see him being a sort of smuggler, but instead of smuggling drugs or weapons, he sells medicines, canned foods, and clothes to the regions where they’re scarce or hard to pay for.
-When he’s older and found a fortune over time, he starts up his own official charity, hiring various sailers to sail supplies to more places than he himself could alone.
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-Okay, I have to say it. Shay would DEFINITELY be an FBI spy. Maybe I haven’t thought of it as heavily as I could, but he just strikes me as a man who could kill someone in plain sight and still not be seen.
-He already knows everything he can about infiltrating and getting vital information
-He knows exactly how to manipulate people to get what he wants.
-He’s like Macgyver but as an agent.
-He does things that make sleeping at night impossible, but he tells himself that every long night for him is another person somewhere else having a peaceful night, and peaceful nights means he’s doing his job. Right?
-Constantly questions his morals, but he can’t bring himself to stop, not knowing that he’d do if he stopped, because at least here he’s doing something. He’s contributing.
-That and maybe I might or might not want to see Shay in a suit 🤷‍♀️
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-Actress. And a damn good one. She’s one of the kind of people who get paid millions each job and gives most of her cash on people who really need it. Not only that, she’s a fan favorite everywhere.
-She takes extra jobs in smaller businesses barely staying afloat, and public morality boosts has nothing to do with it. In fact, she keeps her fame life out of everything, choosing to see it just as another job.
-I can see her sharing similarities of Zendaya or Zoe Zaldana
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-High school teacher or actor, I can’t decide.
-Because let’s be honest, this guys brain is more wrinkled than a raisin. He knows his stuff.
-He’s good at simplifying what he’s saying, and that happens to be a very useful trait when it comes to teaching.
-If he was a teacher, he’d be a damn good one, that’s for sure. No one will fail his class because he’s so good at explaining things, and he’d be the one who actually cares for his students.
-When it comes to acting... just admit that Arno’s a theater boy through and through. If you need proof, he’s the only one with a crazy amount of fancy robes and colors. FOR GODS SAKE HE OWNS A THEATER! So on modern day, I could totally see him as an actor as well.
-He’d be the Ewan Mcgregor of the modern day, because everyone recognizes him from SOMEWHERE because he’s really tested his acting ability on multiple various roles. Well read, charming, and level headed, he’d totally rock being an actor. He’s good friends with Aveline, and when they both have time in their busy schedules, they stop by for coffee and fill each other in on their life.
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-I saw the photoshops of Jacob in boxer life, and I have not been the same because oh my god that is amazing.
-but absolutely he’d be a boxer. He’s the shortest guy in the entire match, but he doesn’t need a stool to knock you on your ass before you can laugh about it.
-His opponents are lucky shattering bones is against the rules because he knows how to make someone wish their dad wore a condom.
-A lot of people think that his rounds must be rigged, and his sister had to physically hold him back every time Jacob threatened to give him a close up of how ‘rigged’ his fights were.
-Jacobs a powder keg, so it doesn’t take much to make him explode, and a lot of the less respectful people he has to fight picks particularly sore spots to do just that.
-He might be pissed, but his punch isn’t the only thing that stings. He knows exactly what words to use, and when they’ve gone too far, he doesn’t hold back.
-Might have a temper, but he has a good heart despite it all. He visits schools and completely turns his personality around with kids. He signs autographs, takes pictures, and makes sure that every one of them have a fun day because he knows that there’s some kids in this school that don’t have those kinds of days. He pays the school for field days each time, making sure they all get out. They bring out the scooters, parachutes, capture the flag, and ‘wrestling’ matches for the kids who want to face him. He loses every time. He never has a bigger smile on his face than when he has children fans walk up to him.
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-She is totally a lawyer and you can’t change my mind.
-Logic and Facts are her strongest weapons, and so far she has yet to lose a debate.
-Every other lawyer knows that seeing Evie walk into court is an instant death sentence, because like her brother, her words are sharp as a knife and her mind is even sharper.
-If they didn’t look identical, no one would believe that she would be related with Jacob the hot headed boxer, because she was level as water and was near impossible to make angry, but god help the poor sod that presses her.
-Her clients almost always get the best case scenario with Evie by their side by how good she is.
-Also like her brother, children are her weak spot, and her hard composure melts whenever she needs to speak to a child in the witness post, making sure that the child feel comfortable unlike the others that drill the kid with questions when they’re too skittish to answer. She takes her time and gets the kid feeling safe, and gently asks their side.
-Evie might not do it as a profession, but Evie has beaten Jacob in the boxing ring in the gym. She knows damn well how to handle herself, knowing she’d need it since she’d be fighting corrupt politicians or gang members who have too often tried attempts at her life. Every time she emerged unscathed, using the attempt at even more evidence against them and insuring a spot in jail. No one dared try attacking her again after that.
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-I’m thinking police officer or motivational speaker for trauma.
-Either way, he’s a guardian who takes care of the people he’s in charge of. He knows words well, and having been down the dark path himself, he knows exactly what people experience and what they want to hear.
-Be the change you want to see in the world, and that’s exactly what he’s doing.
-He’d be a well respected officer, and he’s not afraid of telling off a comrade if someone is wrongfully accused. He’s not very popular in the police station, but as long as he’s doing his job, he’s satisfied.
-He’s saved several people over the course in his life, and his word is well honored since he’s on no ones side. He sees things as what they are and doesn’t twist events he disagreed with to his point of view. Even if it hurts him personally, he doesn’t lie.
-He’s divorced, but they’re still best friends with each other and visit when they can.
AYA (ran out of gifs. Sorry)
-She is hands down a self defense teacher for women
-She sells hidden self defense tools for less than ten dollars, always sure to keep constantly supply of them since many have confessed that they’ve saved them from dangerous situations.
-Like her former husband, she’s a protector and makes sure she provides her students with the best.
-She teaches children what to do if they ever get grabbed, and she’s had many parents in years thanking her when that information ended up saving their child’s life.
-Hands down he is a stunt double
- Preferably Arno’s since he relies more on flexibility than brute strength. Then there’s the fact that they look similar enough in features
-He does the moves that would probably be safer if they were just CGI, but he hates those computers with a passion, preferring to do the real thing instead of giving out something fake. He’s broken more bones than he can count, and the companies he works with always have a medic on standby when something goes wrong.
-They tried convincing him that they only needed him for a few spots, but after realizing that he wanted this (and him assuring them that he doesn’t bother with suing), they let him do his thing. The results are fruitful since the most nitpicky movie fans are absolutely thrilled when there’s a particular move done right.
-He teaches Arno a good few things about how to do action scenes, and they’re definitely good friends.
-Roller Derby
-She lives for throwing people and smacking them without being judged for it, so the Derby’s her safe spot.
-Everyone on the opposing team is terrified of her, always scared when they see her devilish smile, knowing that they’re about to get their asses handed to them. Like her brother, she’s an adrenaline junky, and when she’s not doing the derby, she’s going off into car races in a water trench. She’s surprisingly very good with cars too, knowing the inside and out of a car like the back of her hand.
-She loves it when men try to catcall her. It gives her a perfect opportunity to punch them in the face.
-She loves the races themselves because no one expects it. Sometimes she pretends to act like a beginner and absolutely slaughter them, giving them a nice wink before driving out with her cash.
-Only has a soft spot for the girl who visits her on weekends. She’s practically her older sister, and there will be hell to pay if her favorite kid gets hurt in any way.
-BACA(Bikers Against Child Abuse)
-The moment I saw this, I instantly thought about them.
-they would absolutely be a part of this
-Looking all badass in leather while turning into a softie for children? That’s Eivors entire character right there.
-Eivors not afraid to get physical with an abuser. They’d beat the abuser to a pulp and right after take the child out for ice cream.
-No one messes with Eivor, knowing that their lenience was stretched only for children. Anyone else tried to pressure her? Your teeth would be shattered and they’d wear the bits for a necklace.
-Children are much more brave around them because they’re tougher than their parent and on their side, so they’re not afraid to give them to the police
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yogatherapy · 16 hours ago
Proven Yoga Poses for Weight Loss
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I will illustrate some proven yoga poses for weight loss, but first you need to understand the value of fat. The fat is very beneficial or must have for everyone as it safeguards the temperature of your body. And without fat, you can't walk, you can't sit and many other benefit fat provides the body system to work properly.
Now if the reserve fat exceeds the limit, then it creates a disease like overweight or obesity. It is also seen that, women suffer more than men from obesity problems.
As the fat is essential for the entire body system to function properly, also it is very dangerous when the reserve fat exceeds the limit.
Because of overweight the very common diseases are like: High blood pressure, heart diseases, and respiratory problems.
Laziness in doing hard work
Day sleeping
Over eating mainly of meat, fish, etc.
Modern day wrong lifestyle: Late night parties
30 % of the overweight problem comes from genetic disorders
Lesser digestion of food also creates overweight
When the Pituitary and Thyroid glands tend to work very less or forced to work little due to wrong lifestyle you are more likely to gain weight fast.
Warning!: Every single pound of excessive fat may cost you, a month deduction from your life...
Yoga poses for weight loss:
As most of the yoga poses are very effective in reducing excessive fat from the body. However, some of the poses are extremely effective in reducing weight very fast with a proper diet and some precautions.
In the very morning, perform some purification processes like:
Sahaja Bastikriya:
Wake up at the early morning and then drink a glass of warm water with lemon and little salt added to it, then without any interval practice Viparitkarani Mudra for four times followed by Shalbhasana four times and then Padahastasana four times.
Viparitkarani Mudra: Lie flat on a mat with hands and legs are straight and inside area of your legs is touching each other. Now place your palms on the side of the respective hips and inhale deeply. Now slowly raise your hips and legs upwards of the ground with the help of your palms by bending the hands in the elbow joint and exhale. Remain in this position up to six counts and then slowly drop your hips first and return to the starting position and breathe normally.
Shalbhasana: Lie on your stomach with your hands is placed on the respective sides. Now slowly raise your legs upwards up to the thighs and inhale. At the final position, you hold your breath there for 5-6 seconds and then slowly drop your legs to the starting position and exhale. If you find difficult to practice lifting both legs together you should practice with a single leg lifting.
Padahastasana: First stand erect while the heels are touching each other and raise your hands upward by the side of your ears and then slowly bend forward in the waist and make sure your knees are straight. In this position, the hands are straight as well. Now keep your palms just next to the side of your respective feet and position your forehead between your knee joints. Remain in this position up to eight seconds.
Then some pressures will be created in the intestines and will help you remove any prolonged constipation problem.
After this, practice Agnisara Dhauti. First take a seat and inhale deeply as well as slowly squeeze your navel and lower abdomen. Now you should try to touch your spine by this squeezing and slowly exhale and release the holding. Practice this at least 10 times.
Then practice Bhraman Pranayama. This Pranayama is very easy to perform and effective too. Now walk gentle as a step-by-step and count 1-2-3-4. Now make your first step and count one and inhale, then make your second step and count two and inhale and do this up to four counts. After this, exhale and count one, then exhale and count two and go on up to four counts. This Pranayama is done at the rhythm of every step of yours thus it is named as Bhraman (Travelling) Pranayama. Practice this Pranayama up to six minutes.
You are done with your morning exercises and follow the diet below.
Breakfast with fresh fruits, before taking fruits take half glasses of water with one tablespoon of honey added to it and drink. Five minutes after this, you can eat fruits as breakfast.
Lunch is very much with the seasonal vegetables and with regional food habits. Please do not eat fish and meat, etc. very frequently. It is better to limit yourself from using dairy products much.
In the evening, some yoga poses are to be performed again. Makarasana four times, Paschimottanasana four times and Yogamudra eight times, then perform simple Anulom-Vilom Pranayama.
Makarasana: Lie down on your stomach and place your hands by the side of your thighs, then spread your legs out by keeping your heels inward and toes pointing outwards. Now first bend your left hand in the elbow and keep it on your right shoulder. Bend your right hand in the elbow joint and keep it on your left shoulder. Place your head between your elbows. Breathe normal.
Paschimottanasana: This is the exact pose as described above in the Padahastasana, but here it should be done while sitting on the ground.
Yogamudra: Now first take a seat and perform Padmasana or Siddhasana posture. Keep your spine erect and move both your hands behind the back, and catch hold of your right wrist with the left hand. Women should hold the left wrist with the right hand. Now exhale and bend in the waist downwards until your forehead touches the ground. Remain in this position up to five seconds and hold your breath. Now inhale and slowly return to the starting position. Practice this at least seven times.
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