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suffarustuffaru · 2 months

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What's your thoughts on Garfield

i really really like garfiel!! its been a while since ive read arc 5-6 though so like specific plot details get a little murky in my brain (....also arc 7-8's chaotic plotline sometimes too HAH), but yeah like. garfiel and his family add to like those familial relationship themes in rezero i think, and im Invested in their family drama. and yknow i do like garfiel a lot on his own. dudes like a shounen protagonist in the best way possible i think? like i like that hes introduced as a somewhat unpredictable minor antagonist in arc 4 - i remember being interested when reading arc 4 wn (this was before s2 came out HAH) bc it was like. whys garf acting like this from loop to loop. whats going on with him. AND THEN HIS BACKSTORY REVEAL AND THE TRIAL AND THE REVEAL THAT HES SO YOUNG HAH... its perfect. explains his behavior perfectly. and my fondness for him was cemented in that exact moment.

so like garfiel isnt a rezero character that i obsessively go insane over atm (......thats reserved for subaru emilia reinhard otto heinkel i suppose......) but i really like him a lot. i like how he has like. slight misogynistic moments that he gets called out for LMAO T^TT but hes such a sweetheart with the elderly in sanctuary - hes a mamas boy...... and hes pretty earnest and determined at heart. and he likes to READ... HES A BOOKWORM... hes. such a teenage boy. the teenage boy of all time. that i cannot help but feel fond of him, and hes grown even kinder by arc 8 with all the connections hes made... like i absolutely lovee his arc 8 development. its amazing, and i cant wait to see where he goes from here!!! garfiel's arc 8 chapter with the theatre dream is one of my favorite arc 8 moments of all time!!!! and im terrified of whatll happen thatll cause garfiel's line in emilia's third trial :,))))) but very excited. and also i like the garfiel-heinkel dynamic okay sue me (dont sue me literally im a college student). and i think its really fucking funny that they were both cats in garfiel's theatre dream okay.

also ofc i love the three idiots (subaru otto garfiel) dynamic. absolutely hilarious. and as an older sibling myself to a little brother its very relatable LMAO. but also that moment in gluttony if... where the three of them come to a head bc subarus Like That :(((( man............. but on a lighter note the three idiots ss were very fun reads for me!!! <3

AND OK i want to get more garfiel frederica stuff too. like ofc i want to learn more about frederica and im kind of disappointed that we have to wait so long for that if tappeis word of god stuff on that is true :,) and a tinyyy bit disappointed that frederica didnt get to experience the stuff in arc 5 about her and garfiel's mom and new extended family and stuff :<< but i did enjoy the post-arc 4 wn garfiel frederica bonding :,))) and i did actually consider making a fanfic about garfiel and frederica's mom bc her story is just really, really sad - and if i did do that, id do a lot of research into garfiel, frederica, and their family!! which id love to do i just have limited time bc Real Life HAH so maybe someday!!!

in conclusion i absolutely love garfiel. im on the garfiel defense squad. id die for garfiel. garfiel??? little brother material. absolutely great. spectacular. i love him. i support his endeavors. hes amazing hes soooooooo cool hes - *gets shot*

#this entire ask was me fanboying about garfiel and less about analysis but i do really like him ok HAH #im no expert on him but im fond of him <3 he has a very noogie-able head.#rezero #re:zero #garfiel tinsel #ask #arc 5 spoilers #arc 8 spoilers

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soldier-poet-king · 8 months

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career anxiety which turned into existential dread which turned into me guiltily defending my use of stories as narrative framing devices for my own life & human existence as storytelling more broadly (smthn smthn sometimes you gotta be a little mentally unwell to be mentally well)

what is possibly the longest cringe worst thing ive ever put on this webbed site, but i gotta get it out in writing to clear my head and i type more quickly than i write and if there's a post length limit by god i'm gonna find out

with my deepest apologies if this readmore doesnt work

so we had a Big Fancy Meeting at work today, with a group of information professionals from an Outside Institution (some of whom i had met previously), and which i got to sit in on/play tech support for, which was all fine and well for the actual presentation portion of the event, but afterwards when it was informal chatting and the like it was just???

The following things are true:

i actually got to speak with people close-ish to my age and in my profession

it was a very nice and enjoyable experience and we got to talk both seriously about professional things and also jokingly shoot the shit about shared woes with this one outdated archival software that everyone under the age of 60 hates with a passion

i was also incredibly jealous of this group of archivists & librarians because they're all /friendly/ with each other and i am lonely being the youngest person at work

i am also jealous because theyre working on very exciting projects at A Big Institution with Actual Resources and Technology and PROCEDURES my beloved, and not the slapdash kinda thing going on at my work

this in turn made me anxious because there were certain elements of the conversation i couldn't follow and i worry about my professional development at my current job, and that my technical skills are either atrophying, or not growing in a way that would enable me to get hired at A Big Institution like this one (which is the ultimate goal)

this in turn made me more stressed about my current job, which i just got promoted to fulltime permanent for the following

beyond the skill atrophy fear there is also the fact that my boss is grooming me to be her successor when she retires in 5 yrs and i very Much Do Not Want to be here in 5 years

this adds several layers of guilt

i was just promoted so im getting really sweet messages of congrats from random ppl in other departments who i didnt even think knew/care i existed - the people at this workplace are extremely nice, even if im like. meh. about some of the work/procedures/etc

a large part of my promotion being approved hinged on the fact that im undertaking this big technical project that my boss doesnt have the technical know-how to do. so i cant just bail and leave them high and dry without feeling guilt. but also. it's not so fancy a project that someone else couldnt do it. anyone in my field worth their salt and not super old should be able to handle it. sure i work hard and im friendly, but surely that's not that rare in an employee

i dont even KNOW if there's better opportunities out there. but i see stuff on the listserv all the time, and assuming i could land those jobs, they pay better and are at larger orgs and more in line with what i want

there is an element to working non-profit adjacent that is guilt inducing as well as [redacted thing about my work that would make me feel even guiltier for leaving, i cannot say what, but it is Significant]

this of course, tapped into my larger, ongoing sense of ennui and being 'stuck' and fears about unchosen monotony and purposelessness and all that mid 20s recent grad existential bullshit. i cant really do anything to solve it bc yknow, unprecedented housing crisis, rent is insane, im stuck living in a dysfunctional household which traumatized me as a child, etc etc etc. but broadly:

i am afraid of being stuck in a mediocre job forever. my boss has worked for two (2) archives her whole life and has always done non-profit adjacent work and is like. a one man small archive thing. i VERY MUCH DO NOT WANT THAT

i feel guilty for wanting

idk how to want things or be a person (separate issue), but i know very much what i want career wise. i know what makes me happy and satisfied. and i know what im good at. im doing fine at my current job but i know i could be so much MORE and i want that desperately

if my personal life is always doomed to be dismal, as is my family life, can i at least have one thing

i gave up academia for my mental health and some degree of financial stability, can i at least satisfy SOME of my ambitions here?? just a few??

yes this is pride. yes this is ambition. just bc i spent so long extremely depressed and with 0 self esteem does not make me immune to ambition, even if non traditional.

i feel immense guilt over this but i dont stop wanting it

ofc, my brain is a web, all existence is inextricably interconnected, and im listening to the tge audiobook on my commute and rotating csevet in my brain, thara is more personal, more beloved maybe, but csevet is my fave lil guy babygirl and i have a thing for fantasy secretaries, so i am now thinking even MORE of ambition, and how i have it, and how i love that im good at this one complex but boring thing, i am thinking of kip mdang, of kamet, of muire lo, of how some of my deepest loves, in no particular order, include: organization and scheduling, devotion, competency, well-ordered policies and procedures, righteous anger, boring skills being used to change the world for good, small kindnesses, Duty, loyalty to a person or ideal which goes beyond the functional and the expected and which extends into unprecedented levels of intimacy - whether it be friendship, qprs, romance, etc, and also, metadata and research

so. as i sit there sorting this all out in my brain i am like. wow you are a pathetic human being. you are not even a person. like. why is everything being framed in terms of narrative and story. why does everything relate to a Broader Theme or Arc or Meaning.

i am forcibly reminded of being undiagnosed, unmedicated, aged 18/19 and trying to explain smthn really personal about myself to someone i knew from youth group and him being like. wow. you describe everything and relate to everything from stories.

to this day i live in embarassment over this moment. but also. lowkey. fuck him. and tradcath circles be WILD, the social dynamics BAD, and it was not the place for me to be, even tho i latched on to it lacking any other social contact at the time. if a complete mental breakdown, latent OCD, and a really painful loss of friends is what it took to get me out. like. i cant say i dont regret the loss, but also, i like who im becoming much better now

ANYWAY. i got thinking about stories and why i am and am not extremely cringe

i am a big believer in storytelling is the oldest human activity. it's the most fundamental human activity. this isn't some nihilistic devaluing of the human person, the soul, the human experience, it is instead and elevation of the story. because like. stories are what we do to live. it's why we live. it's how we communicate. storytelling is how we turn to another person and we attempt to communicate the innermost secrets of our heart. language is a flawed tool always ultimately falling short. but we use stories to share ourselves with each other, to be recognized and known, and throughout the ages, to share our grief and love, to know to oneself, no, i'm not the only one, others have experienced this before too. stories are balms and inspirations and are ultimately reflections of their creators, they reflect some Truth about the human experience back to us

im not even talking like. published stories. tv shows. mcu ification of media. i mean /stories/. in whatever form. from whatever time. this isn't a fandom thing - though there is overlap, im not talking about consumption for the sake of consumption, or consumption as a personality trait

i mean like. stories as the bedrock of humanity because it is the only way we can attempt to understand ourselves. stories are foundational because the human person is too complex, having too much of the image of the divine in it, to ever be really fully successfully understood. and so of course. of course we turn to stories in times of trouble, and triumph, and all the times in between. how could we not turn to stories to attempt the divine understanding that is always ultimately beyond us?

(i have a whole other locked and loaded series of thoughts on storytelling in faith traditions, and specifically how the bible is a literary work as well as a spiritual one, and the reasons for this reflected in the human soul, but i digress)

so really. maybe i am pathetic and cringe and a fake not real person (i am all of those things), but i hope it's not because i think in stories, in themes, in arcs. everything is tangled in my brain, inextricable, i can do nothing else, i know nothing else, i would not want anything else, unless it were the full divine understanding beyond mortal means

and besides. i am trying. to be better. to be more. to have comforts and hobbies beyond this. the crafting. the cooking. the career ambitions that arose when i found something that i was good at and enjoyed and was /me/. my insatiable need to learn to dance.

i dont know where im going with this. i barely know where i started. it's stories all the way down, because it's people all the way down, and we are all mirrors of each other and we are all connections with each other in a vast caring world. or. so i like to think

#franposting #long post #im so sorry but also i needed this so.#smthn smthn you go to the circus (my blog) dont be surprised when there's clowns (me) etc etc #i had to take a break in the middle of typing this bc i got worn out emotionally #should that have been a sign to stop? maybe. but i cant read so that sign wont stop me etc #this is the most embarassing cringe thing i have ever posed in my ELEVEN YEARS on this site #ah well #gotta weed out the weak. natural selection for my horribleness #and now. i am going to play bg3 for a bit. and then read. and then bed bc alas. commuting

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zapsoda · 5 months

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fursonas arent necessarily your ideal self... like my guy is transgender but thats not because its how i particularly want to be or how ideally would be. hes trans cause i already am and he is me but with fur and horns and no organs.

not acting like its a curse or a blight on my existence but its not like. my favorite thing in the world either. it really really really fucking sucks sometimes. ideally i would be cis because it would make my life a whole lot easier. ideally i would not be mentally ill or socially inept, obsessive, weird looking, or short, the list goes on. but i am those things and if i were an anthropomorphic animal i probably would still be all those things. just because its not my favorite way to be doesnt mean im not gonna depict it in my art. just cause its not my favorite way to be doesnt mean i find it repulsive or off limits or anything like that

trans fursonas arent cool because in every trans furrys wish fulfillment fantasy they are still transgender man dont fuckin speak for all of us. theyre cool because you dont have to hide things even if theyre not perfect or glamorous you dont have to portray everything in fiction that way. theyre cool because being trans is something that deserves to be seen and depicted and trans people deserve to exist even in fiction.

even if theyre not real you can make your edgy dogself trans and thats cool as hell because being trans is an experience people can have and portraying it in ficiton is valid. for me its like making them dye their hair instead of having it be naturally colored or giving them scars even though you dont have to put them through hardship. like okay i could make him perfect in every way or i could make him ME. yknow?

anyways dont read this and act like im saying every trans person hates themselves and hates being trans fuck you i didnt say that im just talking about my experience as a trans furry.

#guy who gets offended at every little thing and never shuts up #i cant even be happy with trans allies if they do it in a way that rubs me personally the wrong way ahaha TwT;;;;;;#anyways ignore this post

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slugtranslation-hypmic · 2 years

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different media anon here, thank you so much for your answer! It really pushed me to try watching the stageplays someday in my own time... somehow... haha qq if you dont mind me asking again (sorry if theres like a limit on ask per week or something), yknow how theres rivalries between divisions? Had the DRBs not been a thing, which divisions/groups do you think would actually be pretty friendly with each other, and which ones would still be pretty tense despite the lack of hypnosis mics lmao

What a super interesting idea. I tried to consider each team's dynamic with the other team, and it got a little long, so sticking this under a cut.

First, I want to properly define how this thought experiment will work, as removing tension/the Hypmics altogether makes the plot collapse entirely and raises a few questions about how several groups got together and what certain team members are up to, if not orchestrating tension. If Rei isn’t slinking around in the background looking shady and cooking up some DRB-related shenanigans, is he really still Rei? And so on.

Therefore, I am going to stick to the letter of the question. What if there were no DRBs? The DRBs seemed to have come about because Otome had the bright idea of pitting two rap boys against each other for sport in a bloodless, more marketable version of a gladiator match, so what if she just... didn’t do that? When Ramuda called Ichijiku and went, “Yo, what up, homie G, did you know the boys are planning a revolution?” what if Otome didn’t have anything lined up and kind of had to be like, “Well, shit”? So then she sent out Ramuda to break the crew up but in a totally lame, Ramude-esque way.

You know in FP/M+ chapter 11 when Hifumi tries to guess the reason TDD broke up and guesses that someone ate someone else’s pudding? Yeah. That’s what we’re going with here. Ramuda went around, ate everyone else’s pudding, and blamed it all on someone else. (We can assume Jakurai caught him in the act or something.) The mild anger on the Ichirou-Samatoki end and the sheer “wtf, Ramuda?” factor on the Ramuda-Jakurai end was enough for TDD to take a temporary hiatus, and when all tempers cooled down, they decided to go their separate ways but remain friends.

And while this may not be necessary for the letter of this prompt, let’s throw Sasara and Kuukou a bone and say that their tiffs with Samatoki and Ichirou happened in a similar fashion. Would Samatoki blow up and send Sasara’s ass packing back to Osaka (temporarily) if he thought Sasara touched his shit and Sasara, sensing an opportunity to clown on Samatoki for it, did what he does best? Absolutely! Would Ichirou and Kuukou butt heads in a he-said, she-said argument over who drank Ichirou’s last Coke? You know it. But as in TDD’s split, these arguments wouldn’t last long, and everyone would be pretty admicable before long.

Now our stage is set. Welcome... to the pudding AU.

BB/MTC: Samatoki and Ichirou are still homies to some extent, and this means that Ichirou still looks up to him as an older brother figure. By the sort of transitive property of older brothers, Jirou and Saburou would probably likewise respect him and at the very least would play nice with the rest of MTC. Samatoki likes kids, so he’d have no issue with the younger BBs, and Riou enjoys company as well. The group would probably have a lot of fun camping and having cook-outs at Riou’s place in the woods. However, there is an issue, and it is the one person I haven’t mentioned yet. I do not think Juuto “Mature Adult” Iruma would enjoy spending his free time with a middle schooler, especially if that middle schooler is as liable to sass back as Saburou is. Thus, the cook-outs would likely devolve into a very different sort of roasting over a campfire and would end with both Juuto and Saburou in time out.

BB/FP: After Ichirou cools off in regards to the Coke and pudding incidents (which may take a while), I figure he and Ramuda would fall back into a similar dynamic that they have in canon, wherein Ichirou thinks Ramuda’s a little weird but not enough to really do anything about it. FP and BB have fairly dissimilar interests, so I don’t think they would hang out a ton. Additionally, I think Ichirou would be a bit concerned about Dice and Gentarou’s bad behaviors (gambling and lying) rubbing off on the little BBs. Still, they might all get food or something every once in a while. The TDD manga suggests that Ramuda will, when he’s not pestering Ichirou, be occasionally struck with the desire to feed him, so I could see him popping up ever so often to treat the BBs to a nice dinner in some cozy little family restaurant. FP is like the weird uncle and the weird uncle’s irresponsible friends who give baller presents at Christmas and teaches you all the cool swear words you’re too young to know.

BB/MTR: This is a dynamic that I don’t think would work super well, not because of any sort of animosity, but simply that these two groups have such big differences in maturity and interests. The Buster Bros certainly wouldn’t mind fishing or dinner/drinking parties after work, but they wouldn’t have much to contribute to the adult conversation. Likewise, I’m sure that MTR would listen politely (Hifumi maybe not so much) to conversations about anime and school, but they wouldn’t be personally invested in it. I’m sure they all think well of each other but are probably casual acquaintances at best. They might have more luck mixing in a bigger, blended group, such as in TDD.

BB/DH: Despite how surprisingly easy it is to remove the DRBs from Hypmic and replace them with pudding without losing a significant chunk of the story and its character dynamics, I do not think we can conceivably make whatever the hell is going on between the Buster Bros and Rei be about pudding. Therefore, this group does not get along. Sasara and Ichirou probably keep in touch in a vague, acquaintances way. In canon, Ichirou doesn’t really reach out to him after he splits from Samatoki (even though there’s nothing really preventing him from doing so), so I imagine something similar would happen here.

BB/BAT: Oh they would kick so much ass. You know Kuukou and Ichirou would be making monthly trips to hang out with the bestie and try to beat each other’s ass in a parking lot somewhere. Jirou and Juushi would bond over music, and if anyone tried to bully Juushi again, Jirou, Kuukou, and Ichirou would show up to whoop their asses. (Saburou’s on standby waiting with a phone ready to call their lawyer (Hitoya)). I think Saburou and Hitoya would annoy the absolute hell out of one another, so they would end up very close friends too. Somewhere, there’s a group picture of all 6 smiling and hugging, and Hitoya texts it to Jakurai with the caption, “Look at this! Five kids, you bitch. And no child support, no less. You wish. You wish you were me.”

MTC/FP: It surprises me that Chuuouku had to make a reason for Samatoki to hate Ramuda, because the grasshopper arc shows that FP manages to piss off MTC plenty just by virtue of being themselves. I do sort of think that the only reason TDD works as well as it does is because Jakurai is a buffer absorbing the worst of Ramuda’s obnoxious energy, thus stopping him from trying to speedrun becoming a Ramupancake by annoying the absolute shit out of Samatoki until Samatoki beats the absolute shit out of him. And I mean... I do get it. I love the character Samatoki to death, but if he were a real person, by god there is something about him that would make it physically impossible for me to not fuck with him. His bravado is purely a bastard magnet. (I think that’s part of why he and Juuto get along so well.) Also, Gentarou appears to be allergic to cops and would be unable to resist making Juuto’s life hell (there’s a bastard magnet on Juuto too). So I have a feeling this would devolve into an absolute shitfit for four members of this little gang while Dice and Riou are just chillin’ on the side. So long as Dice and Riou can keep chillin’, everything’s all good. To be honest, I think Dice could get along well with MTC provided he left Gentarou and Ramuda at home - hell, I think Dice could get along with virtually anyone in the cast provided he left Gentarou and Ramuda at home. He’s as chill as could be while Gen+Ramu are chill in the same way that the surface of the sun is chill.

MTC/MTR: Hmm.. a mixed bag. Riou and Jakurai would become best friends overnight, partially because they’re on eye level with one another for a change, partially because they can commiserate about war, and partially because Riou would suggest, “Would you care to come into the woods with me to cook absolute batshit ingredients, fish in mountain streams with your bare hands, and wrestle the local wildlife into submisson?” and Jakurai would be like, “Oh! :) Would I!” A match made in heaven. As for the rest, I’m not sure. I think Hifumi and Riou would actually be able to get along in an odd sort of way - they’d swap recipes, and Riou would share some of his plants in exchange for spices he can’t get in the woods - since Riou’s absolutely patient enough to handle Hifumi’s high energy. Doppo and Riou would also work. Like Dice, I think Riou’s chill enough that you can send him to virtually everyone (barring Saburou, who is fourteen - apologies to the fourteen-year-olds reading this, but someday you will understand what I mean) and expect him to come home with a new best friend. Honestly, I think this whole dynamic would actually shake out pretty nicely. They seem like they could be trusted to have a chill time drinking/eating together someday. MTR are like MTC’s square cousins, and MTC’s like MTR’s slightly sketchy friend you know from high school who’s cool but definitely runs with the wrong crowd. (I would say they’re the weed dealer if not for Juuto’s obvious hatred of the topic.) The only reason why I called this a mixed bag in the first place is because I was a bit concerned about leaving Juuto and/or Samatoki and Hifumi in a room together - see the bastard magnet comment above - but knowing that Juuto is Doppo’s acquaintance would probably mitigate that a bit. (Although, knowing that Juuto is a potential Doppal may inspire Hifumi to do something embarassing like share Doppo’s baby pictures.) So hey, why not? Friends.

MTC/DH: God, what an interesting concept. Assuming that Samatoki and Sasara make up, I think Samatoki’d treat him in a “Haha, you knucklehead :) *beats his ass*” kind of way, which is all well and good. Running from an angry Samatoki gives Sasara good exercise. So Sasara would introduce him to Dotsuhonsters like, “Hey haha this is the yakuza leader who tries to beat me up all the time :)” and Roshou would go, “GOOD for him.” Samatoki and Roshou are, of course, instant best friends. The only awkwardness is when one day Roshou and Samatoki both share some pics of themselves a few years back, and Rei doesn’t say anything, but he does lean over and give poor Sasara (who is sweating bullets) a Look. There is not anything this man does not know. (Roshou and Samatoki, of course, are fucking oblivious, god bless their dumb asses.) Introducing Riou to the crew would go well, although I think Riou would be a bit baffled at their high-speed sense of humor. Introducing Juuto would go less well - and here I would like to pause and apologize to all the Juuto fans, since I feel like I’ve been making him out to be a cantankerous bitch, but he really is canonically closed off and prickly. That’s a big part of his character and what makes Juuto opening up to MTC so special and wonderful. At any rate, none of what I said above about Juuto was meant to be insulting, and I am now going to immediately fly in the face of that and lay into him - because I am 100% certain Rei has lured Juuto into an NFT scam, catfished him online, or both. The meetup quickly devolves into a game of tag as Juuto scrambles to get Rei into handcuffs.

MTC/BAT: Like FP, I think BAT’s obnoxious energy is a bit much for Samatoki. However, I think Juuto and Hitoya could be absolutely amazing friends, as they have pretty similar approaches to how they treat the justice system and how it plays into their respective missions. They also seem to have similar-enough tastes that they’d probably hang out in their free time. Hitoya would cry with relief that Juuto actually knows how to spell “charcuterie” after three days holed up in the mountains with Kuukou. Riou and Kuukou would likely respect one another for their strong conviction to their beliefs. I could see Riou being interested in training with Kuukou. Survival rhythm, survival monk. Survival rhymes and survival funk. Get sprayed in the woods by a survival skunk.

FP/MTR: There are two ways I can see this going, and one ends in the apocalypse, which is why I think King Records saw it vital to pry Jakurai and Ramuda apart before their respective groups mixed. On the one hand, I can see this having the same dynamic as a couple who have wildly different friend groups so you know the other dudes in a very second-hand, say “hey” when you pass on the street way. I don’t mean that in the sense that Jakurai and Ramuda would be a couple in this AU, but considering Jakurai’s willingness to forgive Ramuda for much more egregious shit, I think it’s fair to assume they’d make up after maybe four days tops for something as insignificant as “trying to break up the friend group” and “secretly being a government spy”. At any rate, assuming they each go on to build their own friend groups on their own time while still remaining close friends, I don’t think they would try to make one supergroup of pals because Jakurai and Ramuda’s one-on-one dynamic is very different than their group dynamic. Jakurai tends to... maybe babysit isn’t the right word, but mitigate, perhaps, Ramuda in group scenarios like TDD, and that wouldn’t work well with either MTR or FP. Both groups rely on them treating and being treated as equals while being able to express their true selves. Therefore, Jakurai-Doppo-Hifumi would be good friends, and Jakurai-Ramuda would be good friends, and Ramuda-Gentarou-Dice would be good friends, but there’d be no Jakurai-Doppo-Hifumi-Ramuda-Gentarou-Dice supercluster. On the other hand, if that did exist, the results would be disastrous. Yes, I think Jakurai would love this because he’d Hayami Show the hell out of Dice (Jakurai and Dice’s voice actors are very good friends), but if you allowed Dice and Doppo to meet on good terms, their mutual hatred of the systems they live in would spark a revolution overnight. As for Hifumi and Gentarou... Jesus Christ... it might be a good thing that they dislike one another in canon, because I cannot imagine a more chaotic pair of good friends. Together, they have the collective energy of those posts which show someone swerving through incoming traffic at roughly the speed of sound with the caption “Can’t help being a Gemini! <3 Live, Laugh, Love”.

FP/DH: Putting Gentarou and Sasara together is likewise a recipe for disaster. I think they’d try to one up one another, resulting in horrible casualties. I don’t think Ramuda would voluntarily want to hang out with Rei either - he doesn’t seem to be that fond of Rei in canon - so I don’t think these groups would ever naturally mix.

FP/BAT: Honestly, if left to their own devices, I think FP would try to adopt Juushi. Ramuda and Gentarou would, I think, find him very charming, even if Dice might be put off a bit by the crying. I don’t know how things would work with the rest of the crew, though. Kuukou might hold some resentment for Ramuda causing a fight between him and Ichirou, and Gentarou+Dice would be too protective of Ramuda to let this go easily. It’s probably best that these two groups don’t mix, apart from FP trying to arrange custody for Juushi on weekends.

MTR/DH: In theory, this could work pretty well, especially because Hifumi would kill to host a house party for his friends. They’re all mature enough to be able to connect well, if they ever had a reason to connect (I’m not sure what this would be, though - probably a friend of a friend recommendation via Samatoki). In practice, this would be a terrible disaster, because Sasara would goad Jakurai into drinking and then immediately regret it, if he lived to tell the tale afterwards. Still, talk about an interesting experience, huh? Oh, on that note, Jakurai and Sasara may actually get along by virtue of being into interesting people/things, although for somewhat different reasons.

MTR/BAT: Unfortunately, the Jakurai-Hitoya split is another relationship break we can’t pudding our way out of, boys. Hifumi and Juushi seem like they have the potential to connect due to their similar ways of coping with traumatic situations, but god... Poor Doppo... Imagine trying to sleep while the two of them are going, “HA HA HA HA!!!!” in the other room. Kuukou seems a bit too rough and wild to fit in with most of the group, although he and Jakurai might enjoy meditating together.

DH/BAT: Honestly? I could see it. Kuukou and Sasara have a strong dynamic back in MCD, so I could see them staying casual pals and eventually bringing the rest of their crew around to hang out. Both groups also have similar dynamics of younger, energetic dudes roughhousing while an older man looks on and gives timely advice, so I think they wouldn’t clash too much, even in terms of Kuukou and Juushi’s relative immaturity. Sasara enjoys that kind of commotion, and Roshou, while despairing about the state they leave his apartment in, enjoys encouraging kids and younger people. The one point of contention I’m foreseeing is Hitoya being alarmed by Rei’s flagrant law violating.

Super fun thing to think about! Thanks for sending this in.

#not a translation #asks #hypmic asks #humor asks

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sparksnevadas · 8 months

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OKAY, Anon was broken for me last night so I couldn’t send my reaction SO now that it’s fixed, I’ve re-read the last 2 chapters and…

AUgHHhHHh, Sparks, Sparks-,,,, I want SO SO bad to get the HA’s ass myself, like at this point with everything that has gone down, I want them defeated

Also, your writing keeps getting to me, I really really love how you thread words to bring out a picture that you can feel without it seeming like the only thing, I really love how much care and thoughts you’ve put into the backstories we’ve got to see so far AND I’m also a sucker for how you deal with knowledge by limiting us to Grian, who is really out of the loop so we get to experience the same ride and just- I’m stuck in my morning lecture giggling like a schoolgirl, and I’m??? Thank you so much for writing this story

-Zeph (sorry for the rambling btw, autism got to me)

Hehehe hi zeph!

Anon was turned off recently ish because I was feeling guilty about not updating and it took me a moment to remember to turn it back oopsies!

Ah, if things were so simple… the HA has uh. Multiple asses. So to say? Idk my dude im typing this very quickly while im on break

The backstories are very important to me!!!! I thought of the main threes background very early on and have just been waiting for the right time to share it. We’re nearing the end of gihasm, so it felt correct now :)

Limited pov is my favorite!!! And i got to try out a bit of scar limited pov too this chapter. Grian is fun because he clearly has a set of rules and expectations for everyone around him, draws little neat boxes around everyone and categorizes them as good or bad, but hes starting to see the human in scar and the human in mumbo and the human in himself, yknow? I thought the way to really cement that was to literally put him in scars shoes Boots and let him *see* the hirt cause by the HA directly. I hope that came across!!!

Anyways, lov u hope youre doing well!! Dont apologize for rambling in my inbox, ive missed it very much during my accidental hiatus

#gihasm

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galaxygrv · 3 months

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oh jeez,, a sys blog we really liked is proship.. i know we are neutral/neither on the shipcourse topic but like. calling yourself either title is very uh. hmm.

big ass long rant about our shipcourse stance under the cut. in short: its complicated and varies a lot. we do not like the black/white views on proship/antiship stances, it is a giant grey area with a shit ton of shades in it. reminder that we are on neither side for a reason.

we have all proship dni because they are typically not following their own stance correctly and we dont want to interact w most comshippers (which.. technically we would fall under that title but . yknow. we are not into that label. and it implies we are on a specific side of the argument. plus a lot of them make us uncomfortable) and then our "violent antishippers" dni is when someone is actively supporting harassment over fictional topics.

we also fall under a lot of different parts of either side. our opinions throughout the system are different. spyte and pebbles r a lot more relaxed with "problematic" stuff (we hate that term), while some of us are more strict w it.

we absolutely go by "dont like, dont read. also tag your shit correctly". we do not harass people, we might not like the things theyre writing, we might think its disgusting and a red flag, but we are not going to click on it and make a comment about it or interact in any way. we will simply block and move on.

while we technically fall under the "comship" label: no, our fictional interests are not triggering nor does it impact our outside experiences. we are not "loli/shotacon". we enjoy genuine and realistic depictions of abuse, while keeping it interesting in a fictional standpoint (which makes it a little unrealistic like the limits of the human body. but the impact of abuse is realistic). it is mainly for the enjoyment of reading the story and/or enjoying the plot, or to vent if we're the ones writing it. we have never read anything fictional (that wasnt intended to be taken as a real, intentional opinion) that has severely impacted our world view. and i doubt it ever will.

fiction is able to be seperated from reality in specific topics. ex: abuse, even when "romanticized", can either be posted with a disclaimer of "i dont find this hot irl". or not, and you should assume they dont find it hot anyway. you should expect that person to not support genuine non consensual abuse unless there is evidence of the contrary (btw! having smth as a kink does not mean theyre into GENUINE non consensual things!! the fact that its labeled a kink strongly suggests that it is a consensual thing)

HOWEVER, when things are treated as they would in reality, ex: bigoted political comics, they are supposed to be taken as a reality equivalent!! they are trying to turn that comic into a real scenario! that is what they want! THAT is when fiction absolutely impacts reality!

now it gets a lot more complicated when it comes to stuff like COD or whatever other war/combat games like that, which can be taken as anti-military or pro-military. which.. it really depends on who youre taking to. which is the point. it gets complicated, it sometimes changes peoples opinions about reality, and sometimes it doesnt. should the intentions of the game be expressed explicitly, whether outside the game or not? yeah, probably. but it doesnt (to the majority of the public, at least). thats why its complicated. do violent video games inherently make people violent by exposure? no, of course they dont. CAN they impact someones world view, thus their morals and such? yes. they have before, and they always will. it gets complicated, like i said. its from person to person depending if other people were the reason, their environment, or simply the video game alone (which i dont believe is very common)

its all about intention and the way it is expressed. COD does not explicitly (to my knowledge) express its intentions, so people can take it any way they want. political comics are aiming for a specific opinion change, and is explicit about that (its a political comic). now: ao3 fics about sexualized domestic abuse? thats.. REALLY unlikely to be expressed in a way that means "yeah i like this irl when non consensual." if it is? they should probably be investigated for that behavior, that is obviously not fucking good. if it isnt? its just a sexualized abuse fic. who knows why theyre writing it. could be to cope, could be for fun, could be to get off on it, etc. people have always had "weird" kinks n shit like that. im not here to dictate censorship for others comfort or whatever.

cw on various things for this list but if ur curious about what "comship" stuff we like if its important to you: its mostly various types of abuse, yandere topics, "noncon", and teenage underage (which we generally do not read, though we have a few exceptions). the underage we do not find attractive or "hot" and it is ALWAYS for vent writing purposes and the underage character are typically self inserts. any character younger than 15 is repulsive to us to imagine writing about in a way that we would with the older teenagers. we have been writing about/making art of most of these topics since we were a little over 4 years old /serious

anyways uhhh yeah. shipcourse! fucking hate it! everything is black and white over here! where are the shades of grey!!! fuck !!!!!

#cw shipcourse #shipcourse cw #abuse cw #cw abuse #our posts #🐾#i KNOW we said we didnt want to talk abt this but its haunting me #🌸

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kaibascorpse · 5 months

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trying to figure out a way to articulate my thoughts on autism and being autistic without coming across like im glorifying or romanticizing it in some way but its tricky. like okay i know its wrong to romanticize a disability but 1) i genuinely believe that autism (at least in my case) is ONLY a disability because we live in a society that only values neurotypicality so like. removed from that context (which is rly only possible in theory atm, not in practice) autism ISNT a disability it’s just like. a Particular Way of Being a Person and 2) i fucking!! LOVE being autistic!! like, theoretically removing all the difficulties of being autistic that, again, only arise because of arbitrary structures built against me, everything about being autistic is pretty fucking cool imo!! i love my autistic traits!! and maybe it’s just because i can’t imagine any other way of being, but given the opportunity to magically become neurotypical i would not fucking take it!!

like to me being autistic feels like i was born with an innate understanding that human beings are literally just animals and all the things that are a part of typical human society like money, jobs, gender, social expectations and etc. are just like. made up, yknow? and thats not to say that those things aren’t real just because they’re constructed, and they’re also not devoid of value or meaningful function, but like. ime neurotypical ppl just seem to treat these things as Fundamental and Unchanging Facets of Reality. and again, constructs are real and do serve a purpose, but i also dont think you can underestimate the value of being able to peer behind the curtain and say that “Hey these things are made up and therefor we can change them if we want to.”

but again, we live in a society that Does Not see the value in that perspective, and in fact THRIVES on convincing everyone that this Performance of Humanness is not only Very Real, but also The Only Way It Could Possibly Be, yknow? so they really dont like it when they have to deal with an entire population of people who are constantly pointing out that their precious Rules are arbitrary, and who are unwilling and in some cases literally unable to keep pretending that the performance is real. I feel like an actor who keeps getting scolded for not knowing my lines and breaking the fourth wall, except nobody even gave me the fucking script or told me what the play is about in the first place!!

word salad out of the way though, maybe i’m totally off base and this has nothing to do with being autistic, or it does but i’m missing the perspective of autistic folks other than myself. i only realized i was autistic within the past couple years and i only really understand autism in the way it affects me personally (and even that level of understanding is still limited). its very likely that there are many who will say that their autism would be a disability regardless of the societal environment. maybe other autistic people don’t experience that same feeling of peering behind the screen, or maybe that feeling generalizes to a group that is connected by traits other than autism. im totally willing to admit that i may just be talking nonsense here, but i cant seem to shake the feeling that a good deal of the autistic experience is a feeling of Pretending To Be Human, except this version of Human that we’re pretending to be is so exaggerated in its normalcy that its entirely alienating, and its just so ridiculous because being autistic IS a normal way to be a human being, and we shouldnt have to pretend all the time just to be fucking accepted

#my post #pls dont take anything i said here Too Seriously im just like. processing my thoughts ok #that said if other autistic people relate/dont relate to this im curious to hear your thoughts #again for those who may think im pissing on the poor: these are just raw thoughts not fully formed opinions

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intergalactic-chameleon · 1 year

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rambling train of thought

oddly vulnerable for me 2 admit but i admire transmasc ppl a lot and think they r cool and wanna be their friend. transfemmes too. just trans ppl in general i fucking guess lmfao. but transmascs in particular bc i really admire the particular way that they practice / express masculinity

on a related note, this is why i know im somewhere on the trans spectrum bc i admire trans ppl too much to not be one myself, yknow. still frustrating tho bc i feel like everyone sees me as a cis girl and i just wanna be like Hey Um ACTUALLY I Have A Rich Inner Life… I’ll Have You Know… just bc im a girl doesnt mean that’s all i am, i dont relate to a lot things typically prescribed to women, im super duper queer, etc etc

also lots weird back and forth in my head between identifying as a woman purposefully but also on a variation of technicalities. and also wanting to look like a boy, but a very Specific vision of one that i have in my head, and also lacking the want or need to “pass.” very confusing to say the least.

i got a binder recently and i remember thinking to myself “am i getting anything out of this.” part of that definitely has to do with the style of binder i got, which doesnt do that much when u got big tits like i do (i need to get a tank binder sometime). but ive been trying to understand how i feel about my chest, and my body at large. basically, i dont hate my body. i dont. i dont even rly experience gender dysphoria atp. often, i even love my body. it’s attractive. but my body makes me feel frustrated because i feel like i only have so much control over what it looks like. esp bc i dont rly want breast reduction/removal or hormones. i see an attractive man/masc and experience a mixture of reactions. attraction. lust. jealousy. a tinge of sadness. agitation.

again, i really dont hate my body. i just wish i could do more with its silhouette and shape it to my liking with ease. im rly short (4’10”), have big boobs, small frame, curvy figure, long hair… all these things i enjoy or at least am okay with, but put em all together and that’s all anyone can ever see: a woman. and being a woman is cool, and i identify with it. but no matter what it never feels like enough for me. i break out of that box as much as i can because i cant stand being so limited. like if i can so easily be a woman, why cant i so easily be a man (so to speak)? i most aspire to be a fag, tbqh. in my own way that is.

idk if any of this made sense lol

#personal #gender #thinking thoughts #rambles

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transfiguratiion-ooc · 2 years

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01. Please do not softblock me, I will think tumblr has glitched. If you want to softblock please hardblock instead.

02. Asks from anybody are cool with me! Whether it be ic or ooc However things like anon hate will just be deleted i don't have time for that bs.

03. Mun is a minor and also AroAce, I am not interested in romantic or sexual ships. All others are fine though.

04. Please tag animal abuse and irl animal death/injury for me. as well as mentions of bug parasitism. These aren't triggers per say they just gross me out/make me mildly upset.

05. If your blog is 18+ only i will block you. This is so i don't get confused and yknow forget your a 18+ blog, no bad vibes man! We're chill just y'know.

06. I have no time limit on memes! However If its a few days old i ask that you link to it in your ask. I may eventually add a time limit on threads however I currently don't have one.

07. Please be patient with me! I'm still learning all the different Lingo and such. As well as getting grounded with how I want this blog to look and how to format my posts.

08. I will try to match my partner's length when roleplaying. Though it may fluctuate on how much muse I have for that thread. This blog will be sporadic activity.

09. I would appreciate it if you notified me if you drop a thread of ours. I have had some bad experiences with getting ghosted in the past. Oh- and don't be afraid to ask about my replies!

10. I am multi-muse and oc friendly.

11. Even if im not up for roleplay that day my dms are always open! However they are for ooc/planning talk only! However I may be a bit late on replies. I am often on late at night and may fall asleep by accident. I also tend to get sucked into tasks and am usually doing a task while chatting. So it may take a bit for me to remember to check my dms and reply.

13. This blog is a W.I.P, Please be mindful of that.

14. This blog will be (mostly) iconless, This may change in the future however its no icons for now.

15. Please Reblog things from the source, the exception to this rule is if the source is deactivated.

16. Dont interact with me if ur: A kink/nsfw blog, racist, or LGBTQ-phobic in any way. Icon credit:

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diomedrian · 3 years

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...does anyone else feel like if they got better they’d be doing something wrong? especially after a relapse, like a disservice to what was keeping you going before it fell apart again? like you’re betraying everyone including yourself by getting better the way you are? like you’re betraying your own trauma by getting better in the same place that caused it/its rooted in?

#i. i feel better i feel a lot better than i have in months?? but then. i am like its because i am home and i am not doing anything #most of my anxiety comes from being at home bc my parents never let me do anything so you see. i am still seven and i need my dad to make #every call for me and i need mum to make me tea. i am not 22 when i am home and altho i did get better. i got a lot better in 2018/19 and #it was wonderful. i loved that and i loved travelling to offices to get my visa stuff sorted and to get to know everyone and i was #confident and i have never had a good self esteem and i think its because when in seventh grade when we had a workshop on self esteem and #were given an assignment with it i crumpled it up because i didn't want to write anything down i didn't want to admit if i was low on self #esteem let alone what was causing it. and i am not very confident and i have an awful amount of anxiety - to the point that i felt #i felt like i couldn't do the diss and ended up with a ptsd that is only now beginning to look like i will be okay from and i will have to #repeat my master's so like. anyway the point was i am home and i am feeling better and i feel like i am undoing the progress i made before #the relapse.#because that progress was good. i was independent and i didn't cry as much and i handled all my paperwork and i made friends easy and i was #open to every new experience and i was driven and focused and. now. i am not? i am none of those things and i am so scared that this time i #recover it will be...in line with my parents which is to say i will be confident because i have them and not in spite of them and #i know how good it is to have parents who have your back (its very complicated and i am trying to use the nicest words)#but its also scaring me to bits bc i dont want to be like that. i want to be independent and work thru that. being around my parents...is #i get dependable. as one is bound to. i dont want to wake up at seven bc if its late than they will be angry i want to wake up at seven bc #i can and i like doing that. it just feels like crap to get better in a place that i know can only offer me limited growth but that if i go #outside and try growing i will crumble and have to come back to start again bc all growth starts here #its...like a trap? not sure if i am explaining it right but its just. so messy? i want to get better but it also cannot happen until i #exist outside of this house yknow? bc otherwise i will always always fall apart. its just the way its built. you stay away from it too long #and you see everything that is wrong with you and then your growth doesn't feel like growth but that something you put on and suddenly it #doesn't fit and look awfully ugly and everyone's laughing at you and no one believes you and even tho you made it yourself you know its the #crappiest sweater ever and you need to get out of it and so you burn it down and then you realize you have to start over again but #you are exhausted from the fire so you take time away and then you feel better so you head to the store to get the yarn again bc you burned #it all used it all up on the sweater and the wool comes at a price. and without the wool there is no sweater. so like. what do u do.#anyway i m v sorry if this was confusing and you read all of it for nothing. and i am also v sorry about how long the tags got lao #personal

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oriigirii · 3 years

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💞 MC is a Genshin Simp 💞

=====

{ AN: Omg! This is my first ask so thank you anon (๑ↀᆺↀ๑)/!! This is such a vibe too haha, I hope you like it! } Warnings: None [Maybe Refs and Chars you wont get if you dont play Genshin Impact] * Probably a bit OOC too *

Reader: Gender-Neutral [Default]

( ⓛ ω ⓛ *)

========

< Genshin Impact was a game that took the human realm by storm, with its open-world gameplay, its competitive PvE and aesthatic settings, it was truly something that captured you the moment the beta was announced. Although, as with any Gacha games, you weren’t only attracted to the world and its setting.

No no.

The characters were truly the main eye candy of the game. You’d been worried that when you had been sucked into Devildom, you wouldn’t be able to access the game due to, yknow, realm differences, but luckily that wasn’t the case thanks to Levi, and hence why the moment it dropped, you had been spending your life savings simping for characters on every banner.

Yknow theres handsome bois in devildom too... Theyre just kinda waiting for you to put your game down for a moment and kinda notice em ～((Φ◇Φ)‡ >

------

ฅ⁽͑ ˚̀ ˙̭ ˚́ ⁾̉ฅ Lucifer

He usually doesn’t mind you playing games

Although, He would’ve preferred if you didn’t cause you kinda need to focus on your studies yknow?

But hey he’s not stopping you

Usually you would stay with him as he works, but he can’t seem to focus with you constantly begging beside him

Small little ‘please’ would be heard every now and then, and a sudden look of disappointment would show on your face.

He tried to ignore it, even giving little cues for you to quiet down, like clearing his throat

You didnt seem to pick up the hint though

He was just about to ask you what you were doing in the first place that has you praying beside him (which is hella rude) but your scream of happiness has him a little more irked and kinda taken back

“LUCIFER! I GOT HIM! LOOK LOOK I GOT HIM!”

You show him the screen showing your pull results

The character held a giant claymore with bright red hair

Before he can get another word in, you snatch your phone back and just sigh as if youd just had a heavenly (ironic) experience and mumble

“I seriously love him, Im so happy...”

Bro same though, Diluc pls come home

You were truly one of a kind, because youve just managed to break the Avatar of Pride’s... well.... Pride.

Did he just get cucked by a man in a video game?

Truly outrageous.

He seems to scoff and holds back a bit of an eye roll as he tries to focus back on his work

But boy oh boy, his salt is high

“If you are going to be causing a ruckus MC, May i suggest you doing it with Levi instead, I have no time for such games. I dont see why youre so caught up in such a character anyways, he looks quite basic.”

His words were sharp, and that was enough to shake you out of your fangirl/boy mode.

You were literally ready to fight the first born, a literal fucking fallen angel, for dissing Diluc like that

how dare

But then you notice how he seems to avoid your gaze and a small little red tint was on the tip of his ears.

Lucifer wouldve wanted to see you that happy with him, but no, a game character steals that spotlight.

Angey.

Instead of being intimidated by the sudden coldness, you giggle and finally close your phone and set it aside

You can continue celebrating and bragging about it later, for now, you wrap your arms around his arm and give him a small smooch on the cheek, which definitely makes him blush a tad bit

“Awww Luci dont be like that, Yknow I love you more”

Potential apocalypse has been diverted

But Lucifer does smile the smallest of smiles as he sighs, finding it silly to really get jealous over such a small thing and says

“I love you too, my dear... but you do have to make up for distracting me from my work...”

Well you kinda deserve it, so it wasnt long before both his work and your phone had been ditched

( After a while you do kinda see him quite similar to Diluc and it just makes you smile everytime you think about it, seems you have a thing for the strict cold men huh?)

===

Σ(‘◉⌓◉’) Mammon

Why you simping for a fictional character when you already have him?!

He’s your first man!

Your homie!

“Yeah well hes my first 5* so can you blame me?”

S A D N E S S

But for real, this man is just so clingy

He has heard from Levi that you were playing a new game from the human world, and of course, he had wanted to see what it was about by watching you play.

But since it was quite grind-heavy gacha game, he grew a bit bored and asked you to come with him to hang out somewhere else, or even go to the casino and gamble his money away cause he just got goldie back

But no matter what he suggests, you were just so focused on your grinding.

He’d prefer a different kinda grinding right about now with how lonely he is, ya feel me?

But no, you still werent interested.

“Oi! Cmon MC, whats even so important about this?”

“I already told you Mammon, Im grinding for primogems from the event! Theyre gonna be gone soon and I just HAVE to get them! Ugh I swear to Diavolo, if I dont, Imma cry! I didnt get him on their first banner too... ugh!”

Wait no--

Cmon he doesnt want you to cry!

Mammon kinda stays silent for a bit as he watches you struggle to fight the monsters with your low level team, frustration growing on your face.

But as you finish, Mammon seems to snatch your phone

“Hey! whats the big deal Mammon?!”

“Shut up and show me where the store is geez”

Mammon’s demands kinda surprises you and you raise an eyebrow at him, but you do show where it was, and sit back for a while as Mammon just fiddles around with it. You werent sure what he was doing honestly, was he interested? Did you say anything that made him act this way? All you talked about the game was the gacha system so--

oh…

“Mammon! Wait you dont have to---”

“There! I got you as much primo things, or whatever theyre called”

He already has tossed you your phone back and he crossed his arms, looking away as the red blush covers most of his cheeks.

You look at your phone and you honestly felt your heart speed up and stop at the same time at the amount of primos on your account, it was enough for a full 180 pull! If you dont get the limited character on the first 50-50, you have another shot!

You felt your own heart speed up and your face burn so hard, but you do mumble him a quick “But... But why though?”

“Cuz! If you start cryin’ Lucifer’s gonna beat my ass! Dont think I did it for you, you human! I just dont want him taking away Goldie again!”

“But I thought this was your gambling money, isnt it?”

“w-well!... I mean... Hmph.. Gachas kinda like gambling right?, I know Lucifers gonna hang me if he catches me in the casino again anyways, so I thought I might as well just do this... with you...or whatever...” Hes dying, help

But so are you!

Hes too fucking cute and you just glomp him and just hug him as tight as you can!!

Flusterred boi 100

But you do spend you afternoon on his lap, both of you rolling the full 180 in excitement, whether you get that boi/gal you simped for on the banner or not, you still were happy to spend some time with Mammon

He doesnt mind losing a bit of cash for you

but you do promise to pay him back (maybe with a few kissy)

But to be honest, Gacha probably will help him with his gambling addiction...

kinda...

He doesnt go to casinos anymore but he does whale with you now

Lucifer has such a mix feeling with these results.

But he still confiscates Goldie and your card on the end, yall need to chill.

====

ヽ(。_°)ノ Leviathan

He probably wasn’t even interested on the game at first

He already has enough games to play, and it just looks like another rip off of some other game he saw not too long ago with that elf looking guy

But when you came to him asking for his help to get the game, you bet your ass that he felt a switch click

Suddenly it was incredibly interesting!

You do share your interests to him almost immediately

By interests, of course i mean the peeps you simp for

The sexy ara ara in the library of mondstat, the pirate looking ass of the guards, the pirate looking ass’s brother thats a wine owner and still highkey reminds you of Lucifer, the demon slayer--- You were actually unsure if you should talk about Xiao but hey hes cool

You explain it all!

From their lore to their voice lines and whatever

But honestly what do you expect from the Avatar of Envy?

Of course hes gonna be a bit jealous! He cant compare to any of these characters! Hes not as witty as that eye patch man, hes not as sophisticated as that red head, hes not as flirty as that ara ara either!

As you go on, you notice that Levi was kinda... half listening....

It made you pout, but then, it made you worried

Uh-oh you know that look

its that, ‘im overthinking’ look

So to snap him out of it, you kinda grab his face as gently as you can

“Need Grimm for your thoughts?”

He flushes and he immediately looks away, but you usher him to look at you as you coo and ask him whats wrong

It takes a bit till he kinda explains to you how hes feeling

In your relationship, you both were practicing being more open with each other, hence why you were proud of Levi for saying it

but you did feel kinda sad and frowned as he finishes explaining

“You... feel jealous?”

“Ugh d-dont say it out loud normie....”

He covers his face with his arm and you just cant help but shake your head with a fond smile, but you do need to address this and comfort him.

“Levi... when you fanboy about Ruri chan, did you ever think she was better than me?”

Your question made him frown and look at you in absolute worry

Did you actually think that you were below Ruri chan?

Of course hes an absolute simp for Ruri but.. cmon

Now that he thinks about it, he does talk about her a lot doesnt he? oh no...

“MC O-Of course not! I love Ruri chan yes, but you... I... I Love... you more...” Levi exe do be dying

But you smile at his response and gently kisses his cheek

“I think thats sweet Levi... But thats how I am too... Youre still better than any of these characters, youre real and they arent, youre mine and I am yours~ Youre my personal 5 star!” You wink at him and Levi just dips

his heart couldnt handle the cuteness and he died, ladies and gentlemen

but for real he did pass out

Must be from all the blood on his head from the blush

But ah, he does get it, and after being showered with love from you, He kinda slowly got over his jealousy

its not immediate but with simple reassurances, you can manage to reel him in and have fun with you

He does end up enjoying the game cause he gets to spend time with you, and he gets to show off when events happen

He also goes out of his way to memorize locations for materials for you, and when youre sick or busy, he pilots your account

true gamer

But ironically enough hed probably start simping for a character too and of course, you both start bonding over that, which just makes Levi absolutely happy

I wonder if hed simp for Barbara, she is an idol afterall like Ruri chan

Probably lowkey for now

Afterall she looks like a minor so-----

( I dunno i searched shes 16-18 lol )

But regardless, I can imagine you both just cosplaying each others fav characters too

Its a wack looking ship cosplay but yall just simp for each other cause of it, its pretty fun but the rest of the brothers just finds it hella weird

----

I only have energy for these 3 as always, Im sorry! But i promise Ill do the rest!! I hope you guys do enjoy, and Id love some feedback on the characters personalities cause I know they can be a bit Ooc, But feel free to send me an ask! Im pretty open lol 〜(￣△￣〜)

#Obey me #Obey me x reader #Obey me x mc #Obey me shall we date #obey me Mammon x reader #Obey me Lucifer x reader #Obey me Leviathan x reader #Obey me fanfic #Obey me HCs #anon request

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comradedream · 2 years

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1/2 before all this i was a tommy/benchtrio/jack main n never rlly considered myself that big of a dream fan but like. seeing all of their fans' bad takes genuinely makes me want to be exclusively a dtkq + foolish + tina main instead 😭 like inniters have such bad opinions its insane

((im sorry for just now getting to this ive had rly limited time online today lawl))

okay well i’m biased so my first reaction is omg the drama yasss b a dtkq main this is my perfect victory and the sentence “inniters have such bad opinions it’s insane” from a someone in their community is gonna make me CRYYY ur over them omfg speak ur truth 😭😭😭

but like on a srs note yeah i totally understand that, im sorry ur subfandoms made ur uncomfortable :/ ik one of the things keeping me sane last week was that at least the ppl i follow on here and twt were relatively on the same page so i cant imagine being bombarded w shit takes i disagree w from them on top of that, that mustve sucked im srry :( ur always always welcome here if u feel it’s a better fit 🙏🙏 i love dtblr so i think you’ll have fun here and i adore the ccs i main sm i can’t imagine maining anyone else LOL. but also, i dont watch any of those ppl u listed but dont let bad fans turn u off from the content of the ccs themselves that u may still care ab, like dont feel like u have to pick one set and denounce the other if u want to continue watching both yknow. but 10000% center ur account itself around whoever u want and follow from whatever community ur comfortable w, a community is huge part of the entire experience imo so CURATE IT 🌟 cleanse urself fr fr they dont deserve u anyway 🙄 n also it’s not an overreaction, im sure seeing the ppl around u in a totally different light is a shock in addition to u being hurt over the mess(es) last week, that’s 100% valid, it was a Lot

good luck w whatever u do nextttt again ur always welcome here ^_^ <3

#asks

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notquiteaghost · 3 years

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no pressure if you do not want to, but that sounds interesting and i would definitely be down to hear about szpd and bpd being two sides of a coin

ok so. apologies if this doesnt make sense i only talk about this with other crazy people, n also disclaimer i do not have bpd but half my loved ones do, but like. all personality disorders are just subgenres of cptsd, right? the concept of a personality disorder in of itself is a bit [grimaces] because it's like... it's a series of maladaptive coping mechanisms that u have baked so deep into urself as to be essentially irremovable but. people who have NOT done that need to watch how they talk about it. and like, how PDs as a diagnosis started as psychs looking at the end result of childhood trauma n saying 'well that's fucked up that shld be A Disorder' and then only later going wait. wait do you think they're fucked up for a reason????

but, anyway, PDs are cptsd. cptsd is when u experience ongoing trauma when u are not done becoming a person so it fucks up the process of u becoming a person. there's an argument to make that yknow show me a well-adjusted person but. cptsd isnt garden variety fucked up. cptsd IS more prevalent than most people want to admit but it is still like. lots of people do make it to adulthood and aren't rotten at the core. somehow my mother is one of them even. everyone has neuroses but not everyone compulsively ruins their own life any time it might improve.

so. so! lots of things cause cptsd! there are many ways to fuck kids up! and the thing about trauma is the severity isnt actually in The Bad Thing the severity is determined by how supported u are in the aftermath. people can go thru some real gnarly shit and be fine because they had the mental health equivalent of all their safety gear on. people can twist their ankle slightly just walking up some stairs n then never ever recover because no one lets them rest to heal it.

obviously, some people with bpd & szpd did in fact go thru some real gnarly shit. but my two sides of the same coin thesis isnt about the actual trauma. or it is but like. bpd & szpd are about feelings. bpd is too many feelings szpd is no feelings ever.

i dont wanna say bpd n szpd affect more neurodivergent people than other PDs cuz. a) i know almost fuckall abt most other PDs but well u see neurodivergent people tend to be traumatised, b) having Big Feelings as a kid isnt a neurodivergent thing. or, it is but i can say that cuz im neurodivergent n it's complicated. anyway what i WILL say is bpd & szpd start at the same point and that point is having Too Much Feelings

theyre two paths that diverge in the wood. bpd is deciding maybe if i embrace the feelings wholeheartedly i'll be able to control them??? (this doesnt work), szpd is deciding maybe i can destroy the feelings entirely (this also doesnt work). also, '''deciding''', no one wakes up n says Today I Will Pick This Maladaptive Coping Mechanism, this is smth u do gradually while still a child and then later u look back at ur childhood and go Oh Well. That Was Dumb Huh.

this is also imo why both bpd n szpd are so comorbid with derealisation/depersonalisation disorder, cuz the brain only has so many things it can do and dissociating is deceptively nice at first, and like. makes feelings go away! bpd is kinda a vicious circle of being triggered into dissociating then coming back then being triggered etc, szpd is What If I Lived Like This Actually.

anyway it's wild to me always that this is a ~hot take because there's this idea that bpd feelings are? only like that because of the bpd??? and maybe there's an argument that everyone's feelings are that strong at first n most people learn to modulate them but. that just rings so false to me. i learnt to modulate my feelings and ive been informed that's A Disorder. i think everyone has an emotional capacity & the upper limit of it naturally varies. i assume there are people out there who don't feel things as strongly as i do because lots of people sure act like it.

uhhhh in conclusion. bpd & szpd are both about having Well This Is The Worst Thing To Ever Happen And I Have To Die About It be basically your only reaction to anything bad, and choosing to cope with that in two very different ways. endless love to my borderline folks i could NOT live like that.

#asks #like dissolvable sutures #i do not read psych literature so i cant cite like. any of that. NO idea how much '''professionals''' agree with me here #however i have cptsd and so does like half my social circle and that is qualification enough #me n my sister had the exact same childhood n came out with opposite PDs. is my primary source.#this is ALSO why it's really incredibly stupid to decide u cant be schizoid if ur autistic #because like. genuinely. the inherent trauma of growing up autistic in western society is one of the main causes of szpd #no one gets this fucked up for no reason!!!!!!#(western society caveat cuz that's what i Know) (how ctpsd presents is very cultural i am only speaking to the culture i know)#this IS ok to reblog but do not argue w me if ur a neurotypical studying psychology because i hate u. anyone else have at it #szpd tag #psych

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sothischickshe · 3 years

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1 pretty please

1. How did you learn to stop striving for perfection?

an EXCELLENT question, ty my dear <3

hmm, i guess.... experience, kindness, openness & a desire to protect my ~sanity...?

i deffo think i have some perfectionist tendencies, im prone to rereading drafts (of w/e, including work emails) a buuuunch, im easily embarrassed by e.g., typos, im inclined to fact check etc etc etc & i think there's an obvi link btwn that & stress/anxiety. and i dont like being stressed!!!!!! i like having fun!!!!! so i think the desire to not be overly stressed out by something i enjoy is an important factor!!!!

further! perfection is clearly an unrealistic aim! and actually....kind of a depressing one? perfection is... stasis. and not even like homeostasis type stasis really bc if you're having to modify to account for changes....is that perfect...? perfection is death! perfection implies no more learning, no more growth, no more...anything really?! and whatever the fuck perfection means...assuming it was achievable (which...i mean i assume it isnt but definitional criteria blah blah blah), if you managed to hit it once, surely that becomes then an albatross round the neck? i can't see how a desire for perfection can lead to anything but arrogance (upon assuming it's been achieved or even neared) or distress (bc not achieved or neared). that's ugly!!!

so much of (the joy of) writing is, i think anyway, in improving and learning!!! a belief that perfection is something that can or should be reached denies that!!! nothing more to gain or learn?! where is the fun in that??? and there are SO many aspects to writing.... so so SO many! i feel like ppl tend to be drawn to one or a few initially bc that’s what they find most interesting or that’s what they’re good at or w/e, & yea maybe perfection seems like a reasonable aim if your lens is fairly limited but the more that lens widens to Understand and Identify and maybe even Unidentify allllllll these facets & form your own approach/es.... the further away and inherently sillier the notion of reaching perfection must become, no?!

fur!ther!!!! perfection for whom???? perfection for oneself? ok, arguable a sensical concept i guess. for other ppl? hmm. for everyone??? illogical by default. hi, tastes are obvi not homogenous!!!! annnnnd even if snipped back somewhat to be: for ~the masses or ~the critics or ~the tastemakers or whatever the fuck............ like..... who & what are the arbiters of good taste, or the ‘correct’ way to do things, & why? this is obviously underpinned by structural societal forces sooooo........ do you want to be bogged down by ~mainstream notions of ‘perfection’ or even ‘good’ necessarily, yknow?

HOWSOEVER! joy, love, catharsis, healing, learning, teaching........ well perhaps in and of themselves these things are not ‘perfect’, but they come pretty close, no?! i love love love having a process-oriented (rather than product-oriented) approach to writing & i would say ‘perfecting’ (as in improving, honing) HAS to be a better goal than ‘perfection’, no? i have perfected nothing, i will probably perfect nothing ever, but we can always be within the action of perfecting, i suppose? and, not to be full cheeseball, but blah blah journey > destination and it IS the imperfections which make the things that humans make HUMAN, & the messy non-linear weird journey is perhaps de facto perfection so............... well ultimately i dont think striving for perfection is in itself ‘bad’ or ‘silly’ bc well what does it even mean but i would rather strive to enjoy & grow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

write right rite

#AND im not gonna proof this properly COS i gotta get dressed to go get on my hippie shit #(i was on the phone to my mum in the midst of this so i mighta changed tack in the middle or left something out idk but such!! is!!! life!!!#writing #on writing #creativity #art #*)#also ty jozebel #this was a v fun one! <3 <3 <3

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