#both have their value

[cinemaocd]

this is probably going to be long

OK, I lived through the AIDS crisis. I was a young person questioning my sexuality at arguably the worst possible time in American history. I discovered the word "bisexual" (hooray I have a label) only to read a few days later in mainstream news about how "bisexuals were responsible for spreading AIDS to the hetero community" which was a take that was tolerated on national news shows at the time. The only sex education I had in my entire public education was a film we were forced to watch about how you could get AIDS from french kissing (you can't) and heavy petting (which we didn't know what it was because it was outdated old people code for oral lol)...

The entire LGBTQIA plus community was not attacked as a monolith, the focus of hate came on gay men, because they were the most obviously effected and also the most visible and prominent in the community. The rest of the community did their best to embrace and protect them. (For example lesbian groups that were on the front lines of caring for people who were sick when no one else would...).

And there were people like myself who identified as allies but were in a place where they didn't feel safe to come out themselves. I did not come out at that time because even though I was in accepting local community at University and working at a feminist journal I knew I would lose friends and family and possibly future work opportunities. Being Bi it was easier to blend in for me and I took advantage of that. Part of the reason I hesitated so long about coming out was I felt a lot of guilt that I didn't come out in the 90s during the AIDS crisis. I felt like a coward who wasn't worthy to stand with such brave people.

It took me a long time to let go of that self-hate to the point where I could come out. A big part of it was acknowledging how fucked up the climate for LGBTQIA folks in the 80s and 90s. We had two family friends (which is how I knew I would probably be rejected by a lot of my family) who died of AIDS. Yes, these were brilliant, creative men who worked in theater. One of them was the props coordinator for Late Night with David Letterman (responsible for building Dave's velcro suit etc.). I also have a peer who died of AIDS in the early 2000s, long after the disease had supposedly been "not a death sentence" who also happened to be an actor.

Despite their lack of political involvement, they were be seen as radical just because they lived openly as gay men in a society that hated them and wanted them dead, and only tolerated them if they were the "fun gays" who weren't actually threatening the status quo...

Being in theater or the arts was a survival tactic for a lot of people ya know because it was a more accepting environment and because it wasn't considered important like politics, medicine, science etc. (Miss me with the gays can't do math jokes. A gay man invented the fucking computer).

The gay men I knew in long-term monogamous relationships survived the worst of the crisis and they automatically became "respectability queers" for having not died and wanting jobs with health insurance etc. Because one dude follows his dream of working in theater and the other quits theater and goes to work at the phone company and buys a house with his partner, one is fun and the other boring? One is a creative genius creating culture and the other is a consumer of cultural pap? Wow. Great take.

FUCK. I'm just getting so angry thinking about this. You want to know why it took me till I was FIFTY fucking years old to come out: AIDS. That's it. ONE Fucking word.

Sorry I have no idea WHY I fucking started this other than I saw a shitty post that said, our culture became boring because all the fun gays died and left only the boring gays who only care about marriage or whatever.

#Also: what the fuck is wrong with CATS and ghostbusters??? #both are great #both have their value #if you want to bitch about marvel or shitty broadway musicals then do it #please don't throw all the old gays under the bus for being boring while you do it #also there was that post yesterday about Anthony Perkins and I did not realize he died of AIDS #I don't know how I missed it...oh it happened in 1992 when I wasn't living at home and didn't have a tv... #sometimes the sex positive bubble of tumblr will prefer the LOLZ lifetime achievment of fucking take #over the he was conflicted because all of society hated him for being gay and many many shitty people rejoiced I'm sure when he died take #as they did when other prominent gay men died of AIDS #PS: those are the same people trying to pass legislation attacking trans people #the same fucking people

[lastoneout]

the whole guilt-tripping language in posts about important topics paired with how I'm still getting bitches in my notes talking about why it's actually good to tell "bad" people to kill themselves continues to prove to me that a lot of people have absolutely no concept of social justice or activism outside of assuming the worst of and then viciously attacking strangers on the internet

#the worst part too is this is just the logical conclusion of the hyper-individualistic society #that thrives on isolating us from each other and our communities #anyway pls get out and go volunteer to clean up litter or at the soup kitchen or something #y'all need to see that your actions can have both good and bad real world consequences #and also interact with people who share your values but come from different walks of life #and also how to organize with people you don't always 100% agree with #so yeah hang out at the farmer's market or smthn y'all really need to connect with your communities

[kasieli]

When they said “blend in with the crowd,” they didn’t mean that. | From this scene in Winter Soldier because I saw it again and had to recreate it with these two

Bonus:

Feat. Poppy forgetting that Ominis is blind

#hogwarts legacy #sebastian sallow #ominis gaunt #poppy sweeting #fanart #hogwarts legacy mc #sebastian x mc #I’m sorry I HAD to #someone pls stop me #i’m having too much fun #I realized I really enjoy drawing people kissing? #something I’m kinda proud of? idk lol #we love boss babes that take initiative and cute flustered boys #Am I the only one that thinks poppy and ominis would be cute together? #like they both come from families whose values don’t align with theirs? #no? Just me? #Poppy is so cute I surprisingly really enjoyed her quest line! #sebastian sallow x mc

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

When discussing or analyzing Dazai, one thing I hope you will keep in mind when reading anything I write about him is that from my perspective, he is always, always both.

What do I mean by this? Well, I find there tends to be a general split among people who hold the opinion that "he's a manipulator and will always be manipulative" and "he's doing his best to be good and helpful and live up to Oda's last wishes for him", of which, neither is completely right - because he is both. But even among the people who hold to this dual-nature interpretation, I find that his individual actions and motivations still tend to be thought of in a dichotomous manner - is it manipulative, or genuine?

Again, I think it's always both.

Dazai has a very pragmatic view on a lot of things - he is always looking for the usefulness of things and people so that the situation turns out in his favour. He's incredibly adept at this, and his prediction and placement and careful reveals are all manipulation tactics to get his allies and enemies doing exactly what he needs them to. I don't think anyone can contest this since we see it over and over in the series.

But that's not all there is to it. He's not solely manipulative and he does, to some extent, sympathize with others - I think there are several instances of this in the series, but I want to stress that this has been apparent since Chapter 1!

For context, Dazai is recalling what Atsushi said to him a few minutes earlier, but it's very interesting that it should be this specific part of the conversation. He could've flashed back to the part where Atsushi said he had nowhere to go; no money, no food - he is about to trick him into joining, after all, and this is the key piece he uses to basically force Atsushi into the Agency. But instead it's Atsushi's self-deprecation that catches his attention, and it really does, because even during the conversation, he turns to look at him after he says this with an odd expression.

You could say that this makes Atsushi easier to manipulate, if that's your angle, but that can't be solely it, because in the later conversation with Hirotsu, we know Dazai was planning to bring Atsushi into the Agency and set him up as one half of the new Double Black the moment he met him. The panel shown there is the riverbank, set much earlier in the day than this scene. He was already planning to pair him with Akutagawa since he figured out he was the tiger, so what's with this reaction?

Well. Sometimes the simplest explanation is the best.

He manipulated Atsushi into joining with the intention of utilizing him in his future plans. He also helped him and gave him a place to belong, and importantly, he likes this kid! It's both.

I think much of it might be that his brain just kinda works way too fast - he's such a natural at crafting these elaborate plots and seeing how things connect and gathering useful people like resources that it's practically automatic - though this is not a great means when you're trying to be a kinder person. There's an omake, I believe, that has him saying "I like using my head for justice", i.e. using these underhanded means to act for the better. Not great, but those are the kind of gifts he has. He's way more suited to exploitation, but is choosing to use these tactics to save people now, which is quite reminiscent of what he tells Kyouka. Kyouka's talents lie in killing people - when what you're good at isn't who you want to be, what do you do? Well, I expect you use what you have, even if it's not ideal.

Now, about the current situation with Sigma - I think he definitely likes him, and is intrigued by him and his situation. We did get a little thought bubble where the guy amusedly compares him to Atsushi, and you can't tell me he doesn't care about Atsushi (listen to the onsen drama cd, or read 55 Minutes if you somehow don't believe me). But also, it's undeniable that Sigma is in a very vulnerable position of being homeless and having had no one be genuinely kind to him before. His trust is very easy to earn, and with the latest chapter, Dazai has now saved his life multiple times. There is, as always, a practical purpose he needs him for. And I have to be somewhat amused because Dazai is quite literally telling Sigma everything he ever wanted and needed to hear. It's a brilliant means of quickly endearing himself to Sigma - but I don't think that's all it is.

Look. The most honest moments we get in this series from Dazai are, interestingly for an expert manipulator, when people are at their most vulnerable. In spite of every pointlessly cruel act he inflicted on Akutagawa, his first meeting with him was open and transparent; much like the orphanage director, it seems he thought this treatment would make him strong and adaptable (he's wrong but that's not the point of this). He cuts Kyouka off in irritation and says "don't give me that" when she implies that she would fail the entrance exam. He tells Atsushi it's normal to cry after losing a father figure and to feel however you feel, even if that person caused you nothing but incredible pain and cannot be forgiven. He refuses to entertain Sigma's assumptions that Dazai sees himself as a superior being to him.

Selective honesty can also be utilized to great effect; Mori does this, and undoubtedly it serves this purpose for Dazai too. But I want to stress that I do sincerely believe this is all still honesty from him. Manipulation, or genuine?

Both. It's both.

#or to summarize: Dazai is a gemini (derogatory) #<- said as a fellow gemini (also derogatory) #the few exceptions to the always both rule are basically any of his interactions with odasaku #and the bit in sb where he tells chuuya about what activating corruption will entail #most everything else appears to have a dual reason. #to be clear: there's lots of ways to interpret dazai - but this is the approach i personally use in my analyses #so i'd love it if you guys would read my dazai analyses keeping this standpoint in mind :) #i think instead of debating 'is dazai bad' which is seriously kind of irrelevant to me #i'd love to talk a bit more about how dazai is actually quite helpful but also equally presumptuous about what will help people #we could also talk about the fine line between protectiveness and possessiveness with him too. #or about how drawn he is to kind people who value life likely because he's hoping to find answers or a vicarious experience #anything except the 'is he good or bad' debate. i don't like it. :/ #bsd #bsd meta #bsd analysis #bsd dazai #storyrambles #oof i never know how things like this are going to go over.

[realbeefman]

choreman is the beautiful love story between two men who are so deeply morally fucked and repressed and who have been through hell together but who are still both. at their core. deeply boring and uninteresting people. their ideal date is going out to a nice restaurant together and sharing a bottle of wine. they go home every night to a picture perfect apartment that they clean together every sunday afternoon and read medical journals next to each other on the couch. they play video games together on the weekends semi-regularly and it’s the closest either of them ever get to having a hobby. on special occasions chase gets foreman a new tie and foreman gets chase a new cologne and then they have sex in missionary and fall asleep at a reasonable hour.

#they yearn to be normal and they could achieve normalcy in each other #i mean. theyre both fucked in the head so theyd definitelh both WANT to have crazy kinky sex together #and do exciting things #but i think what theyd most value in each other #is that they understand each other’s desire to just be regular and boring #and to be at peace with each other #they both have stressful jobs they dont need that sort of constant excitement/stimulation in their personal life #choreman #robert chase #eric foreman #house md

[athina-blaine]

for my money, labru is head and shoulders above other ships involving them simply due to the unmatched yap potential, i imagine them feeding off each other's energy like they're slipstreaming in mario kart until they start going fast enough to break the sound barrier

#dungeon meshi #dunmesh spoilers #labru #the Compounding Yap Effect #thinking about kabru wanting to understand the value of monsterhood despite how much pain they caused him ... #laios wanting to understand the value of humanity despite how much pain they caused him ... #none of this even mentioning how much kabru needs a person like laios to spur his character growth #kabru is a schemy schemer who schemes and it's one of his best qualities #but it's also what gets him killed over and over again in an attempt to get closer to laios and co when none of his usual tricks worked #it took until the absolute 11th hour where kabru HAD to choose #between potentially unlocking the secrets of the dungeon or giving it up to the canaries and losing his chance forever #if kabru had fallen back on what he knew he would have killed laios then and never got what he wanted #laios forcing kabru to be honest with his feelings #(a feeling kabru had buried so deep he was barely aware he had it in the first place) #is what finally gets laios to stop and listen #and he finally gives kabru enough of a reason to trust him and make kabru stop the canaries and give the party time to escape #and it's ONLY then that kabru is able to get what he wants #legit i cant imagine a more fulfilling ending for kabru than getting to directly engage his interest in a way that directly helps people #with someone who both needs wants and sincerely appreciates his skills #literally riding off into the sunset gay ass ending im #im going to be sick #day 28 being normal about them

[philtstone]

things monkey man does that are far more interesting than the “violent revenge good actually” take ive been seeing a lot of

constructed facsimile of godhood w the trappings of power glamour wealth etc used for evil vs real potential of godliness/divine in the average person with no power or trappings other than the true beauty found in nature and human connection

wisdom and healing found in connection with diverse peoples vs trauma and evil found in manipulated division of peoples

rage against injustice as a form of worship

leveraging a very specific genre of action movie (one man kills all bad guys in his path) to explore these ideas

#anyway it wasn’t a perfect movie but a very interesting one and it saddens me that ppl are simplifying it to revenge good #esp bc they compare it to movies in totally different genres that say revenge bad #firstly both ideas can have value to explore! but secondly I don’t actually think monkey man ever says revenge good in an absolute sense #phil.txt #monkey man #delete later maybe

[tangledinink]

new gemini update was so good as always but I can't stop thinking:

big mama: there's nothing wrong with my sons

splinter: you fucked up two perfectly good kids is what you did. look at blue. he's got an eating disorder

wwhhhattttt? nooo, don't be silly. leo doesn't have an eating disorder.

leo and donnie have eating disorders--

#this is a Joke but also No It's Not #it's just different flavors lmao #but both of them have absolutely fucked relationships with food #my poor babies... :(... who did this to you...? #(it was me i did) #leo spends a lot of time worrying about whAT hes eating and how mUCH hes eating and if hes eating the rIGHT thing #largely due to his mom and also just being a celebrity/child celebrity in general #but also in part due to: #donnie has a lot of food sensitivities which have really never been accommodated for at all and as a result he just #has a very negative association with food and eating. he doesnt LIKE eating and he avoids it a majority of the time. #its stressful and unpleasant and he doesnt like it #which ofc only gave leo another reason to hyperfixate on food and calories and nutritional value etc etc etc #which leads to #ironically #leo (who def has an undiagnosed ed and restricts/denies himself food regularly): worrying abt making sure donnie eats enough #donnie will do the same thing back sometimes but not with the same obsessiveness that leo does #esp because the ideals surrounding eating and dieting set up around them really kind of just #lead them both to believe (at least to an extent) that leo is fine and eats a totally healthy and ok amount of food (esp in comparison to d #(no he doesnt)(and even when he does thats not the point) #tw eating disorders #cw eating disorders #eating disorders #tw disorders eating #cw disordered eating #disordered eating #gemini au asks #asks #anon

[bumblingbabooshka]

[Tuvok & Janeway: Control, Distance, Duty & Connection.] Sources: St Voyager Transcripts / Mitski 'First Love Late Spring' / Disco Elysium

#web weaving #star trek web weaving #st voyager #Kathryn Janeway #Tuvok #be the change you want to see in the world - make a long post about Tuvok & Janeway's similarities <- angel on my shoulder #I feel like a lot of people see them as 'opposites attract' sort of friends where Janeway is unhinged & Tuvok reigns her in #but in reality I think that while there is that element in there (exacerbated HEAVILY by their delta quad circumstances) #what I see most in their relationship is how they both value loyalty and duty above all and are extremely rigid with themselves #and the people around them. How they both have to maintain distance from others bc of their positions as captain & vulcan #I hate when people dismiss Tuvok as not being remotely interested in Maryana or Noss - it erases an interesting struggle that he and Janewa #both share - their desire to stay loyal to their spouses vs the 70 years of loneliness that that loyalty demands of them #But they BOTH triumph and they BOTH remain loyal (Tuvok until he returns to T'Pel and Janeway until Mark informs her that it's over) #and for both of them it's a little bit insane for them to do that. #Isn't it more interesting that Janeway and Tuvok both have feelings for people other than their spouses but don't give in #to that temptation? #They're both people who live very fastidiously by codes. Either written codes or moral codes - they very rarely if ever do things because #it's what THEY want to do. I'd say they're the least emotion-driven members of the crew and yes I'm including Seven because Seven #has a very...how to describe? It's a blunt and insular selfishness. She does what SHE wants to do and doesn't really care about others. #To me that's emotion-driven. Or...personal desire-driven? Not a bad thing at all but very different from Janeway & Tuvok who #are always more 'this is logical' or 'this is for the crew' rarely do they think 'this is what I want' bc they can't afford to #for different reasons (captain & vulcan) #they both also are in the most 'caretaking' positions on the ship from my POV. Security and Captain - both are directly in charge of #ship and crew safety. #Janeway & Tuvok #star trek voyager #st voy #when I say caretaking I'm NOT saying they're everyone's mom and dad or whatever - I'm saying they're in positions where they always #have to think about the greater good and the crew as a whole and how much danger is acceptable etc etc. #Janeway is always killing herself for the crew but Tuvok is right there beside her

[msnihilist]

Headcanon that, as Timmy gets older, he kind of starts to hate his last name. He already has some bad connotations with his full name after the Wishology situation (Timmy having a fear-response to his own name lives in my head rent free), but the older he gets, the more he dislikes it.

It's the last name of his parents, who neglect him and don't try to learn the first thing about him. It's the name that teachers snap at him when he's failed yet again. It's another reminder that the family he has with his fairies isn't really his and he can't keep them. He doesn't have a single good connection to his last name.

Anyway, all of this to say that I'm thinking about the way Jimmy says Timmy's last name in Part 3 of the crossover. Not with disappointment or disdain, but fondness. Like it's just Timmy's name. He uses his last name, "Turner," and it doesn't mean "terrible student" or "useless kid," it means "friend." Like Jimmy looks at him and just sees a person instead of everything that everyone's ever told Timmy is wrong with him.

#fairly oddparents #timmy turner #nicktoons unite #jimmy neutron #jimmytimmy #timmyjimmy #jerkinators #am I thinking a little too hard about this? perhaps #I'm just kind of a little bit obsessed with timmy going to other dimensions and being WANTED there #like he has that whole episode about feeling unwanted and then s6 has the fairy-lympics episode— #—where the pixies and anti fairies were both clamoring for his approval #so many fairies showed up for his birthday!! #so many fairies LOVE timmy like THEY HAVE A STATUE OF HIM OMG #and in retroville timmy has five friends who think he's amazing!! #sure Jimmy took a while to warm up to him #but they're BUDDIES #they're a great team!! #in jimmy's dimension timmy is VALUED and WANTED #follow me for more normal thoughts in the dead of night

[bfdifan26]

started thinking really hard about one the other day for some reason

#i odnt feel like talking but im just gonna say if they turn out like my perception of them in my head oh man. i might have a 5th favourite #also i LOVR the idea of them having a way more clearly alien appearance compared to the other algebraliens #both bc of them being isolated unlike the others we know who r either in the playground or with the objects #and also bc they just . like the way they look n dont want to change to appear less threatening to objects #which is what four two and x did #but ididnt feel like coming up with and putting all the alien features n extra limbs and stuff here rn #they’re so cool dude…… moon alien……………..augh #battle for dream island #x finds out his value #bfdi #bfb #tpot #xfohv #bfdi one #xfohv one #tpot one #odieart

[dayurno]

what do u like about allison? not attacking u or anything she's just always fell flat to me and im open to enlightenment

shes funny to me :) i like that she's catty and entitled and insufferable, but that there are moments where it slips (namely grieving seth, but also offering herself up to be a confidante to neil, crumpling into renee after andrew hurts her) and we get to see that she's terrified of herself And others and that money could not buy her a sense of self nor a reasonable emotional framework. there are also small things about her that i just find endearing, like the few times where her and matt act like siblings (when the foxes get rained on and matt takes a picture of her looking soaked, much to her horror, and when jeremy shows the foxes his game plan for the semi finals and allison tugs incessantly at matts sleeve to let her see it) and her horrible betting problem, the way she knew neil caused seth's death but also knew she couldn't live her whole life with that grudge, her gossip habits, the way she desperately wants to fix everything with money (taking the foxes out to the cabins after neil got kidnapped always seemed like such an obvious attempt to soothe the team to me, but allison was not raised on affection and the only way she can conceive it is through what she can offer them in monetary terms + i'm reminded of the bit in the ec that allison keeps a trustfund for the foxes' children and that she pays for renee's child's medical bills) etc!

i do mean it when i say that allison and kevin are not all that different, and they have a very similar understanding (or lack thereof) of the way relationships work, but allison can be such a steorotype sometimes it's hard to allow ourselves to see her as anything but a tall hot glass of skank, whereas we naturally give kevin more nuance and space for humanity because we are taught to believe men are more capable of complexity than women. one of my favorite allison is kevin in a wig moments is the fact that allison's goal with seth ('to make a real man out of him', to give him something to live for, to make him want to achieve it) is exactly the same as kevin's goal with andrew

#asks #allison #i think this is all? #but yeah i feel like allison can be very misunderstood because at face value she's playing the role of heiress perfectly #and its well its not unlike kevin's exy robot bit is it #i think they are both people who have developed a very specific shield to protect them from the world outside #and just because allison's is easier to be around doesn't mean that she's not just as lonely as kevin at the end of the day #thank you for letting me ramble about her! made me remember how fond i am of this horrible woman

[fromtheseventhhell]

"It's normal for siblings to fight" Okay well it's not normal to be extremely classist and look down on your sister for being non-conforming. Or to go to the woman who ordered the death of your pet to tell her about your father's plans, when he specifically warned you against doing so, because you want to marry the boy you saw attack your sister and her friend (contributing partially to said father's death and your sister being unable to escape on the ship he chartered). Or to think of your sibling as unsatisfactory in comparison to another when you believe her to be dead. I notice that none of the "Sansa and Arya are going to reunite and instantly have no issues" crowd ever acknowledge any of this, which makes it seem like they don't actually believe what they say about their relationship being normal and easily reconciled. People wanting them to have no issues simply because they're siblings is another example of how fandom likes to flatten complex characters and relationships. They get reduced to being bickering siblings when their conflict runs deeper than that. If the author is telling you that they have "deep issues" to work out [X], I don't understand being so adamant about ignoring said issues. I also get the sense it's about ignoring the capacity for a certain character to be flawed, but that isn't going to change the fact that her "slip of the tongue" is very likely to be revealed and a source of further conflict 🤷🏾‍♀️

#arya stark #sansa stark #house stark #asoiaf #also if it's so normal for siblings to fight then why are you guys losing your minds over us theorizing they won't get along?? #the amount of condescending /that's just how siblings act/ takes I see 🙄 #sorry I guess? that we read the book and don't just delete parts of the story because we find it convenient? #it's not even like takes about them being enemies is widespread the most I see is that they aren't instantly bffs when they reunite 😭 #some people theorize they'll never be close but guess what? that's a completely fair and valid assumption based on their relationship! #personally I think they'll have a sweet reunion before the issues they have inevitably surface again because while they've been through #a lot they haven't fundamentally changed as people or the values they hold #and I think that's going to be very interesting to read about! #I can't figure out why people always take the most boring bland route for how things will play out #mostly because people seem to be unable to swallow the concept that Sansa is a flawed character who isn't perfectly sweet all the time #and the fact that their conflict is instigated by Sansa's classism #which is funny cause in the grand scheme of things her being mean to Arya is such a mild thing that opens the door to a ton of growth #never seen anybody but stansas equating her being a bully to her sister to her being evil/a villain #all we do is point out that it exists in the story...people in this fandom have no concept of nuance I stg 😭 #anyways they're both complex characters and their conflict is interesting and I hope we get to see how it plays out #cause it's definitely going to be better then that trash d&d came up with 🙏🏾

[designernishiki]

it’s kinda funny to me how that dumb scene in kiwami 1 of majima getting shot and left for dead in the harbor was basically just added as a half-assed way to explain majima not being around for a bit of the plot, but they accidentally(?) just made it seem like start of a chain reaction where majima ended up feeling slighted and heartbroken after being abandoned like that and then lashed out about it via smashing a big truck into the building kiryu was in. and yeah that isn’t inherently a romantic thing as-is but then they go and add the part where majima grabs a hostess and performatively hits on her as in-kiryu’s-face as possible, she says she’s already in love with someone, and majima lets her go immediately, no questions asked, making a big fucking point of it just to say see THAT kiryu? I appreciate when people are HONEST about their FEELINGS. people who won’t just BACKSTAB someone who CARES about them to save themselves. is that so crazy kiryu?? huh??? anyway make it up to me get down here and fight me right fucking now

#I think on another level he was sorta saying like ‘hey kiryu. you’re making it extremely clear that you don’t trust me and my intentions #and I’ve been trying to show you- over and over again- that I’d do just about anything for you and your safety #but I can’t just let my mask fall off in front of everyone- I need to keep up the unpredictable morally grey wildcard act for both my sake #AND yours. because disguising my helping you as crazy random violent outbursts and weird stalker behavior #is the only way I CAN help you. do you think it would go over well with shimano or literally anyone else if I was outright helping you out #of the kindness of my heart and fondness for you? stop being so fucking dense and look past the crazy wacky nonsense for a second and #maybe you’ll realize that all I do at the end of the day- really- is help you and put my own life and reputation on the line for you. #I am an honest guy when it comes to my real values and when I told you I wouldn’t let anyone kill you unelss it was myself- I meant it. #I’ve taken a knife and a bullet for you now. can you REALLY not see through the act yet? am I REALLY that unpredictable when you think about #it?’ #that was a longer explanation than i intended but. it was difficult to put into words #I basically feel like it could be read as him implying kiryu shouldn’t backstab the people who put themselves on the line to help him #and/or pointing out that he’s never actually done kiryu dirty and has stuck to his word protecting him in the ways he can #trying to say yeah all this is a crazy act and all but when it comes down to it you Can trust me #it really makes sense when you think about it that he’d have to help kiryu/show affection towards kiryu in unpredictable convoluted ways #at that point in time because. I mean. there’s a reason he was the only person who showed up to welcome kiryu when he got out of prison #and that’s because A) he sticks to his word and his loyalty to people he cares about and B) no one else had the balls or the batshit insane #mask to wear to ward off anyone asking real questions like majima did. because ANYONE associating themselves with the supposed #patriarch-killer was a HUGE NO-NO at the time. someone important showing up for kiryu and welcoming him back outright could’ve caused #all-out warfare probably. except majima. because majima was dedicated and smart enough to use his widely-feared wildcard persona #(that everyone tended to view as incapable of having any Real agenda to worry about) to his And kiryu’s advantage #does that make sense??? I feel like it makes a lot of sense if you get it to click in your head #kazumaji #majima #kiryu #yakuza #kiwami 1 #yk1 #rambling

[nobodymitskigabriel]

I love the idea that Gabriel is one of the few beings in existence capable of understanding the scale of Sam's torture in the Cage. Sam's trauma might make him "out of reach" to ordinary people in some respects, but it also gives him an otherworldliness that puts him on more even footing with supernatural beings like Gabriel.

#but i also dont think gabriel could understand sam very well and wouldnt even want to if he hadnt suffered himself #not that u need to suffer to be empathetic just that gabriel is naturally scornful and self absorbed #he doesnt care about sam until he has a reason to #yes gabriel is one of the few angels to value humans but he doesnt see them as perfect equals #but the fact that sam 1. took a nosedive into LUCIFER'S CAGE for all of humanity's sins #and 2. somehow SURVIVED the ordeal and came out the other end walking and talking #dramatically alters the way gabriel sees him specifically and wouldve to some extent even if the asmodeus arc hadnt happened #by the end of s13 after everything both of them have been through he's unable to see sam as anything other than his equal #and i think having someone capable of understanding the cage and lucifer the way gabriel does would end up making all the difference #supernatural #gabriel spn #sam winchester #sabriel

[codacheetah]

DID I EVER SHOW YOU ALL MY LITTLE GUYS...... LOOK AT THEM

#codacheetah #my art #in stars and time #isat #isat loop #isat siffrin #clay art #polymer clay #look at them..... my children #they're both kinda scuffed siffrin is very obviously my first ever clay guy and loop has smudged paint #but i heart them so much. my sillies #and i just happened to have a tiny tree on my desk!!! so it works out!!!!! #edit: oh btw sorry if my tablet looks disgustang it's from the clay i don't value my belongings #also sorry if my desk looks disgustang it's because i like Stuff