#aqua love notes waterproof notepad

[vermin-disciple]

With Apologies to Shakespeare

No one's given me a prompt on my shower notepad for awhile, alas, so this morning I scribbled out a Garashir pastiche of my favorite Shakespearean sonnet instead. As you do.

(Transcribed with light editing below the photo. The original poem is Sonnet 138: When my love swears that she is made of truth, which I memorized on a whim in high school and has thus been rattling around in my brain for the last 20 years or so.)

When my love swears that he is made of truth I do believe him, though I know he lies For his culture finds honesty uncouth (Or so he says, with mischief in his eyes) Whene’er I question him about his aims In response to my many wearied sighs He sits across our table and proclaims That all is true, especially the lies! But when I think on secrets that I keep Not just from him, but all those I love best This seeming lack of trust cuts not so deep For on both sides is simple truth suppressed And I have learned a new truth of my own: That love lies not in trust of words alone.

(Also on AO3)

#I feel like I have achieved new heights (or alternatively sunk to new depths) of nerdism here #aqua love notes waterproof notepad #my fanfic #my poetry #garashir #star trek #ds9 #fanfic #fan poetry #sonnets #poetry #shakespeare #vermin rites

[spnfanficpond]

March 2020 Angel Fish Awards and Raffle

Send us the fics that make you wanna bathe in holy water, that make you sob into a pint of ice-cream, that make you squee and giggle like a schoolgirl. This is one of the best ways to shine light on the fics that are near and dear to your heart- the fics that you absolutely love that aren’t talked about enough- the fics that stop you in your tracks- the fics that deserve all the love in the world.

SOUL OR NO SOUL, IT’S EASY TO GET IN ON THE ANGEL FISH AWARDS AND SHARE SOME LOVE!

Not sure if you or the writer is in the Pond? No worries, just shoot us a message (@manawhaat or @mrswhozeewhatsis) or check out our registries and we’ll help you find out.

Does the fic have to be from this month? Nope! As long as they are a SPN Fanfic Pond member, you can nominate any (spn related) fic they’ve written.

How do I make a nomination? Easy! Simply send us a submission / ask /IM with the link to their fic (or title and author’s url) and a review of why it stood out to you. Tell us your favorite thing about it, about the author’s writing. Tell us why we need to read it and show your favorite authors some love. Any fic, old or new, is welcome and will be listed on our masterlist as long as the writer is a member of the pond.

*We kindly ask that you keep your noms to a max of 4 noms per author. If you really love that writer, great, but the point of these monthly ‘awards’ is to share the love, not make it a one person show.

Thanks, Management

BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE!!

Nominate a fellow Pond member’s story and get yourself an entry into the raffle! Remember, every nomination is an entry, and you can nominate as many as you want! So, share the love, guys!!

Deadline for Angel Fish nominations is Midnight, PST on Tuesday, March 31st!

Details on prizes, how to enter, and how it all works below the cut!

To see the complete list of prizes and pictures of all of them, CLICK HERE to go to the prize post!

Every month, the winner gets an SPNFanFicPond journal from the CafePress shop! 

Along with this fabulous prize, the winner also gets to choose from this list of prizes:

The SPNFanFicPond shop over at CafePress has all kinds of items with our logo on it (logo designed by @revwinchester) that you can choose as a prize! T-shirts, sweatshirts, hoodies, totes, phone cases, keychains, baby clothes, duvet covers, throw pillows, shower curtains, hats, and even jammies and underwear!! Want a thong with our logo on it? YOU CAN GET THAT!!

Story Commission from @queen-of-deans-booty!! Have a request you want written by an awesome writer? Here’s your chance to commission one! If you choose this prize, you would negotiate the details like ships/reader insert, characters, and content, and we would pay the fee! Story is subject to the writer’s individual commission rules.

GISH box prizes!! One of our Big Fish, @girl-with-a-fandom-fettish, donated a whole box full of stuff that she got from GISH! All of these items are still in their original packaging where possible. - Unicorn Pool Floatie - GISH silly straw (If you choose this prize, you can also choose another prize from the GISH box!) - GISH sock monkey hat - GISH Assbutt plushie - GISH tote bag - GISH flag - The Rebel’s Workbook - GISH sticker 3″  (If you choose this prize, you can also choose another prize from the GISH box!) - GISH enamel pin 1″  (If you choose this prize, you can also choose another prize from the GISH box!) - GISH merit badge  (If you choose this prize, you can also choose another prize from the GISH box!) - GISH dice set  (If you choose this prize, you can also choose another prize from the GISH box!) - GISH assbutt charm  (If you choose this prize, you can also choose another prize from the GISH box!)

Writer Emergency Pack (Click here for more info on this prize!)

The Writer’s Toolbox (Click here for more info on this prize!)

Aqua Notes - Waterproof notepad and pencil so you don’t forget ideas that hit you when you’re in the shower!

Vintage Enochian Pendant from Supernatural-Things.com

Supernatural charm bracelet from Supernatural-Things.com

8x10 season 4 promo print from CultureFly

8x10 art print (Dean/Castiel/Crowley) from CultureFly

9x12 art print (s4 Dean/Sam/snake) from CultureFly

9x12 art print (s14 promo pic Sam/Dean/Cas) from CultureFly

Gil McKinney’s (Henry Winchester) Christmas album (signed CD)

I wish for this enamel pin 1″

I wish for this t-shirt, size XL (Misha not included)

You Are Not Alone enamel pin 1″

What a great load of prizes!!

How To Enter:

All you have to do is submit a story by another Pond member for an Angel Fish Award, and you get an entry for the raffle! Each nomination equals one entry, and you can nominate as many stories as you want!

HERE’S THE SCOOP ON THE ANGEL FISH AWARDS, IN CASE YOU’RE NEW:

Every month all of you fantastic writers work your asses off to post some truly incredible stories. Our Angel Fish Awards are the way for all of us, as a community of writers and readers, to lift each other up and give praise to those who have captured our attention and deserve a few kind words.

ANGEL FISH AWARDS ARE PEER-NOMINATED, WHICH MEANS ANY POND MEMBER CAN NOMINATE ANY OTHER POND MEMBER’S STORY!

AND REMEMBER, SUBMITTING FICS TO THE POND MAKES THEM SUPER-EASY FOR OTHER FISH TO FIND AND ENJOY!

If you have any questions about submitting nominations or prizes, send a message to either @manawhaat or @mrswhozeewhatsis​ and they’ll help you out!

#afa reminder #angel fish raffle

[vermin-disciple]

The shower notepad returns! I actually wrote this months ago and for some reason never got around to posting it. Oops. Transcribed with some light editing below (or follow the link to read on AO3).

FIC: Gentlemen of Fortune

Prompt: Bashir asks Garak to design and construct a costume for a holosuite pirate adventure with Miles.

“I find it so fascinating,” said Garak, “that for as much as humans love to talk about their species’ supposed enlightenment, you’re still so inclined to romanticize some of the more unsavory elements from your own history.”

He did not look up from his embroidery, so he did not see Julian’s expression, though he could imagine it well enough, and he could hear the fond exasperation in the reply.

“It’s a game, Garak. And not even a terribly accurate one. Otherwise, there’d be far less action and far more time spent watching people die of dysentery and scurvy.”

“Yes, but you did say that this program is set during the golden age of piracy, and not, for instance, the dark age of piracy. That implies a certain nostalgia for the era, does it not?”

“You’ve got me there.” Garak looked up in time to see a lopsided, somewhat rueful smile. “The truth is, it was a pretty grim period in human history. Imperialism and colonialism. Constant warfare between the major powers. Whole economies built on slavery. I suppose that’s part of what makes the pirates more appealing.”

“I’m not sure how the presence of petty criminals would improve the situation.”

“I’m not saying they did, necessarily. I’m just saying that when all the legitimate institutions are brutal and oppressive, it’s easy to sympathize with the outlaws. They don’t look so bad in comparison. Take my character, for instance - “Black Sam” Bellamy - he always tried to avoid unnecessary violence and bloodshed, and tried to be a sort of Robin Hood figure - robbing the rich to give to the poor, that sort of thing.”

Garak raised his eye ridges. “And did this charity of his distribute wealth to the most deserving and destitute, or merely to himself and his cronies?”

Julian chuckled. “Very much the latter. I didn’t claim he was a saint. Just an exciting rogue with an excellent costume.” He jabbed his finger at the PADD he’d set down on Garak’s table for emphasis.

That, at least, Garak could agree with, and he lost himself for a moment envisioning Julian’s long legs wrapped in those silk stockings.

“Can you have it finished by next Friday?”

“Of course, my dear Doctor. You’ll be as dashing as you are disreputable.”

---

Note: The title is a reference to Long John Silver's preferred euphemism for pirates in Robert Louis Stevenson's Treasure Island. And no points for guessing what pirate romcom inspired the prompt.

#my fanfic #aqua love notes waterproof notepad #star trek #ds9 #fanfic #garashir #garak #bashir #vermin rites #verminmom

[vermin-disciple]

This prompt has been sitting on my shower wall for ages, mocking me. (The additions in red were my mom getting impatient with me lol.) Finally did something with it:

Transcribed (with some light editing):

Prompt: During a conference excursion to Starfleet Academy, Bashir plots to provoke heat-seeking behavior in Garak by proposing a stroll thru Golden Gate Park on a “warm San Francisco night”

“You’ve done this to me on purpose,” said Garak, with a dramatic shiver.

“Great though my powers may be, I don’t control the weather,” said Julian. He wrapped his arm more tightly around his companion, who snuggled closer.

“Starfleet could, if they had any sense.”

“San Francisco without the fog just wouldn’t be San Francisco.”

“It’s not the fog I mind—at least under these conditions I don’t have to subject myself to those hideous sunglasses you packed. The temperature on the other hand…”

“It’s not that bad, by Earth standards. It doesn’t even snow here.”

Garak shuddered.

“But to return to your original point,” continued Julian, “how is this my fault?”

“It stems from your human prejudice against Cardassian standards of propriety.”

“What?” asked Julian, nonplussed. “I think I’ve been very accommodating of Cardassian social mores over the past year.”

“That may be. But coming from such an unrestrained, demonstrative people, you naturally feel constrained by our rules regarding public displays of intimacy.”

“That’s rich, coming from someone who groped my shoulders in full view of the entire replimat within five minutes of meeting me.”

“And so,” continued Garak, ignoring this comment, “you lure me out to this park, using my appreciation for the natural world and plant life in particular against me, in order to force me to seek warmth from the most readily available heat source.”

“That’s my nefarious plan, is it? To take you out into the cold so you have to cuddle up to me in public?”

“Quite insidious,” said Garak, with a sage nod. “Actually, I’m rather proud of you.”

Julian rolled his eyes in an exaggerated way that belied an underlying fondness. “You could have just looked up the weather before we left the hotel, love.”

#fyi there is no such thing as a warm night in san francisco #this is a city that barely even manages warm days #my fanfic #aqua love notes waterproof notepad #verminmom #garashir #vermin rites

[vermin-disciple]

Fanfic: In Vino Falsitas

AKA the shower notepad returns! I realized this one was getting away from me so I decided to get out of the shower and finish it in my regular notebook instead. Transcribed and lightly edited below.

Prompt: In order to eavesdrop on Garak’s and Bashir’s intimate conversations at Quark’s bar, Odo shape-shifts into a bottle of kanar.

Odo had not really believed the rumors that the station’s lone resident Cardassian was a spy. It was not the Obsidian Order’s usual practice to send an undercover operative who stuck out like a riding hound in a kana field. Still, he was an anomaly, and Odo regarded anomalies as inherently suspicious, so he had kept a close eye on Garak ever since the Cardassian withdrawal.

Now, with the recent revelation that Garak was (almost certainly) a former member of the Obsidian Order, Odo was determined to keep him under much closer observation. An exiled agent was potentially even more dangerous and definitely more unpredictable than an active one.

Odo was also increasingly concerned about the station’s CMO, who was naive even by Federation standards. A sensible person, having learned about his ‘friend’s’ unsavory background, would surely have ended their association beyond that of doctor and patient. Dr. Bashir, however, had instead substantially increased the amount of time he spent with Garak during his off-duty hours ever since the business with the cranial implant concluded. He had even lately curtailed his usual evening pursuit — namely, trying to mate with any attractive humanoid who would have him — in favor of sharing a bottle of kanar with Garak at the most secluded corner table in Quark’s.

The kanar bottle was very interested in their conversation.

Odo had bullied Quark into giving him the actual kanar, since he didn’t fancy the idea of traveling through a humanoid digestive system. It was a viscous, slightly acidic liquid and the sensation of being filled with it was somewhat unpleasant. Still, he hoped they didn’t finish it too quickly, as he had yet to decipher their conversation.

Continue on AO3

#my fanfic #aqua love notes waterproof notepad #verminmom #star trek #ds9 #fanfic #garashir #odo #vermin rites

[vermin-disciple]

My brother left some graffiti on my shower notepad, so naturally I decided to interpret it as a prompt.

(Note: As usual, I wrote this after turning the water off - we are in the middle of a drought here, after all. I also had to stop hogging the bathroom eventually, so I wrote the page above and then finished it on my laptop.)

Prompt: Hi. (And the 'i' is dotted with a heart.)

“Hi, Garak,” said Julian, taking his accustomed seat in the Replimat.

“Good afternoon, Doctor,” said Garak. “What a curious greeting. Does it have something to do with our current altitude relative to Bajor?”

“What? Oh. No, it’s just a more casual way of saying ‘hello’ I suppose. But I’m a doctor, not an etymologist. ‘Hi’ — H-I — and ‘high’ — H-I-G-H — are just homophones.”

Garak gave him a blank look (though knowing him, it might have been feigned).

“You know, two words that sound alike but mean different things?”

“No, I don’t know. Kardasi is a precise and specific language that always allows us to say exactly what we mean with little ambiguity.”

Garak’s tone was rather stuffy, but his eyes were twinkling.

Julian snorted. “In short, the ideal language for a plain and simple man such as yourself—”

“Of course.”

“—who has never been anything but completely straight with me—”

“Oh I’ve never claimed to be straight,” said Garak, his closed-lipped smile shifting into more of a leer. “Especially not with you.”

Julian flushed, but soldiered on. “—who clearly has no use for puns—”

“A very low form of humor.”

“—and who is definitely not full of it.”

“Full of what, Doctor? Kardasi pronouns never lack antecedents. I’m not full of anything but Yigrish cream pie at the moment.”

“Come back to my quarters and I’ll come up with something.”

“You’d like me to sample some other variety of cream pie, perhaps?”

“My dear Mr. Garak, I’m glad that we’re finally speaking the same language.”

***

Note: I tore the page off after finishing and photographing it, and this morning this is what I found on my notepad:

Sigh. I suppose that means I have to write a sequel...

#my fanfic #aqua love notes waterproof notepad #garashir #star trek #ds9 #fanfic #vermin rites

[vermin-disciple]

Bad Shower Poetry II

Mom hadn't come up with a new prompt for me yet, so I decided to give her one as a joke. Then my brother hijacked it, and further silliness ensued.

(This one requires a bit of explanation: my mom is an antique dealer, but she also buys and sells a lot of rocks, and Quartzite is a town in Arizona that hosts a giant rock and mineral show every year.)

Transcription (me = italics, brother = ALL CAPS, mom = bold):

Prompt: Julian and Garak acquire some ROCKS!

WHEN GARAK AND BASHIR WENT TO QUARTZITE

THEY HADN'T THE KNOWLEDGE, NOR FORESIGHT...

They found an ophidian

Carved from obsidian

A reptile the doctor can't bite!

#aqua love notes waterproof notepad #verminmom #verminbroski #my family and other rodents #my fanfic #sort of #poetry #vermin rites

[vermin-disciple]

I just want you all to know that the shower notepad situation gets even more absurd when my brother shows up.

Transcription (with my brother's additions in bold, mine in italics):

There once was a doc named McCoy...

Who preferred bacon bits made of soy...

He ate them all day

To the Captain's dismay

Because Jim preferred bits made of poi!!

If that "Hi" looks familiar, it's because this is the first time he did that, it resulted in Cunning Linguists. The second time, I just responded with this little attempt at fanart.

#aqua love notes waterproof notepad #verminbroski #my family and other rodents #my fanfic #sort of i guess #my fanart #aka why I stick to writing lol #poetry #technically #star trek #tos #ds9 #mccoy #kirk #garak #vermin rites

[vermin-disciple]

This prompt has been taunting me for a couple of weeks now, and apparently I’m too stubborn to just tear off the page and ask for a new one. Finally took a crack at it this morning, and here are the results. (And my previous shower notepad works can now be found here.)

Prompt: Unintended Consequences: In an ill-conceived attempt to provoke a jealous response from Garak, Ziyal flirts with Julian…

Ziyal always tried to give people the benefit of the doubt, and so far this policy had served her well. However, perhaps she should have listened to Nerys about the dangers of taking advice from Quark. He sauntered over now, as if summoned by her thoughts, and topped up her root beer.

“I just hate to see one of my loyal customers so miserable,” he said. He nodded his head in the direction of a table in the far corner, where Garak and Dr. Bashir were gleefully disagreeing with each other about something or other. “I’m telling you, you should march right over there and start flirting with Bashir. Jealousy! It works every time.”

“Oh, it worked alright,” said Ziyal, gloomily.

“Then why the long face?” asked Quark. “I did warn you about his profit margin. The problem with custom garment production is too much overhead and too much time spent on labor. If you ask me—”

“It’s not that,” said Ziyal quickly.

“Then what is it?”

She sighed. “The problem is that it wasn’t me he was jealous of.” 

#my fanfic #aqua love notes waterproof notepad #verminmom #garashir #star trek #ds9 #fanfic #tora ziyal #quark

[vermin-disciple]

Further adventures with my mother and the Aqua Love Notes Waterproof Notepad:

Mom’s Prompt: Rootbeer Revisited! On a date at Quark’s Bar, Elim and Julian share a vile libation…

“It’s a vile libation. I don’t see how it would be improved by the addition of ice cream.” 

“Oh c’mon. You like sweet things,” said Julian, sliding his glass over. “Just try it.” 

Garak was tempted, though not for the reasons Julian might think. But how wretched and pathetic was it, to take a sip merely because that was the closest his lips would ever come to touching Julian’s?

He did it anyway, and grimaced theatrically. “Every bit as dreadful as I anticipated. As I told you, my dear Doctor—” He paused, actually considering the flavor now settled on his tongue. “Is there alcohol in this?” 

“More than you’d guess from the taste. As you see, my dear Mr. Garak, some sweet things do have a little bite to them, underneath the surface,” said Julian, aiming an absolutely devilish grin in his direction. Garak’s mouth very suddenly went dry. 

He took another sip.

#aqua love notes waterproof notepad #may add more to this one later idk #my fanfic #verminmom #ds9 #garashir

[vermin-disciple]

Finished about half of this one before I had to vacate the shower so that Mom could use it for its intended purpose. Finished it in my other, non-waterproof notebook later, and you can find the continuation at AO3. 

Prompt: Garak and Bashir argue the merits of James Bond’s methodology (i.e. spycraft a/o seduction)

“How do I know you’re not just after Starfleet medical secrets?” asked Julian playfully.

Garak pulled his lips just far enough from Julian’s neck to say, “If Starfleet Medical wanted to keep any secrets, they would use more sophisticated security encryptions.” When Julian tensed, he lifted his head to offer an innocent smile, and added, “I’m only joking, of course, Doctor.”

“Of course,” said Julian, rolling his eyes.”

“Besides,” said Garak, “I’m sure that no Cardassian intelligence agency would stoop to a tactic as crass as seduction.”

“Not that you, a simple tailor, would know anything about it.” Julian didn’t roll his eyes this time, but the eye roll was certainly implied.

“Precisely,” agreed Garak. “Though it wouldn’t surprise me if such methods were common in human spycraft, as evidenced by that James Bond personage.”

“We’ve been over this, Garak. James Bond is a fictional character, not a historical figure, and he was invented in the mid-20th century. Hardly a representation of modern Starfleet espionage.”

“And yet he’s still featured in contemporary holonovels,” said Garak. “I would say that fiction tells us a great deal about what a culture values, and how it approaches problem-solving.”

Continued on AO3

#my fanfic #aqua love notes waterproof notepad #verminmom #garashir #star trek #ds9 #fanfic #my photos

[vermin-disciple]

Fic: The Care and Keeping of Reptiles

Following our previous adventures with my shower notepad, I told Mom she could try writing me a prompt next time. 

(Then I got a bit carried away this morning answering it. As with last time, I did write most of this after turning the water off.)

Still can’t decide if this notepad is the best or worst shower-related purchase I’ve ever made. XD

(I will post a typed version of this later as well. I am well aware that the legibility of my handwriting is not much improved when it’s scrawled on a bathroom wall.)

#my fanfic #verminmom #ds9 #garashir #aqua love notes waterproof notepad

[vermin-disciple]

2021: Fanfic Year in Review

Happy new year, everyone! Thought I'd start off 2022 with a review of all the fic I posted during 2021.

The Spy Who Robbed Me (January, 2,939 words): Julian's dress uniform has mysteriously vanished. He has his suspicions about who might have stolen it.

Taking Steps Is Easy, Standing Still Is Hard (February, 2,346 words): Tain had briefly considered having Bashir eliminated shortly after Garak’s implant malfunctioned, before determining that it was more trouble than it was worth.

A Tone Which Is Now Forever Fled (February, 1,301 words): Dax realizes something a couple of centuries too late.

Unintended Consequences (February, 180 words): Ziyal always tried to give people the benefit of the doubt, and so far this policy had served her well. But perhaps she should have listened to Nerys about the dangers of taking advice from Quark. (Part of the Aqua Love Notes Waterproof Notepad series)

License to Twill (February, 472 words): “I’m sure that no Cardassian intelligence agency would stoop to a tactic as crass as seduction.” (Part of the Aqua Love Notes Waterproof Notepad series)

The Piano Man Comes to Quark’s (March, 347 words)

I’m in Quark’s Bar on Deep Space 9 The dabo wheel’s starting to spin There is old Morn sittin’ next to me Makin’ love to his Tellarite gin

Press Your Advantage (April, 645 words): During the Dominion occupation of DS9, Weyoun explores Garak's shop.

Five People Garak (Probably) Never Had Sex With (April, 3,080 words): ...and one he (definitely) did.

Tell Me You See Me (Started May 2020, finished June 2021, 78,481 words total, 14,846 posted in 2021): After Garak receives an unexpected communication from Amsha Bashir, Julian finds himself trying to navigate both newfound parenthood and his own unresolved parental issues, in the midst of an increasingly tense situation on war-torn Cardassia.

Cunning Linguists (July, 254 words): “No, I don’t know. Kardasi is a precise and specific language that always allows us to say exactly what we mean with little ambiguity.” (Part of the Aqua Love Notes Waterproof Notepad series)

When Fair Is Foul (October, 415 words): “What’s an Ireland?” asked Ensign Golwat.

Deprivation (October, 954 words): “I didn’t want to disturb you. You haven’t been getting enough sleep lately,” said Julian, in his reasonable doctor voice. Then, in far less elevated tone, he added, “And it looked like you were having a very pleasant dream.”

Quid Pro Quo (Started in August, finished in October, 10,317 words)

“Now, Chief, it’s hardly polite to insult me, under the circumstances.”

“Insult you?” Miles’ frown deepened. “I’m not trying to insult you, I’m just trying to…”

“You’re insinuating that you would rather die an agonizing and untimely death than have sex with me,” said Garak. “I’d call that very insulting.”

Communication(October, 544 words): “Well, this particular alien body isn’t all that complicated. Not in this context, anyway.”

Proper Procedure (October, 971 words): Sometimes even doctors need to be reminded of the importance of following Starfleet's medical protocols.

Inimicus Inimici Mei (October, 1,506 words): Tekeny Ghemor considers whether to accept an offer of assistance from an old enemy.

Deplorable Company (October, 772 words)

“I’m not a rat,” said Bashir.

“You’re a Terran. All Terrans are rats,” said Garak. “But some rats eat better than others."

Courtship Displays (October, 1,659 words)

“I hope Garak does take me up on my offer to teach him to play,” said Julian, once they’d ordered their drinks and seated themselves at a table. “Do you think he enjoyed watching the game? He said he did, but it’s difficult to tell with him.”

“From what he saw of it,” said Miles, rolling his eyes.

Julian’s brows furrowed. “What do you mean?”

“I mean that it wasn’t exactly the game that he had his eye on.”

Casualties (Causalities) (November, 2,015 words)

“Good afternoon, Doctor,” he said, without looking up or betraying any surprise at Julian’s abrupt and uninvited appearance.

“Hello.” Julian leaned against the doorway, still as a statue in spite of the hum of frenetic energy still whirring away under his skin, and watched him in silence.

After a few minutes, Garak shot him a wry smile. “Did you come barging in here merely to enjoy the view?”

A Bag Full of God (WIP, started November, last updated December, 13430 words): 19-year-old Elim Garak wakes up in bed with an alien he’s never seen before, and things just get stranger from there.

The Children Are Cool, They Don’t Raise Fools (December, 294 words)

“You’ve done this to me on purpose,” said Garak, with a dramatic shiver.

“Great though my powers may be, I don’t control the weather,” said Julian.

(Part of the Aqua Love Notes Waterproof Notepad series)

Total word count: 59,287

That's 20 fics completed in 2021 (including one WIP from 2020), and the first few chapters of one WIP.

POV characters: Julian Bashir (9 fics), Elim Garak (4), Miles O'Brien (2), Enabran Tain (1), Jadzia Dax (1), Tora Ziyal (1), Bill the Piano Man (1), Weyoun (1), Amsha Bashir (1), OC: Crewman Duane (1), Benjamin Sisko (1), Tekeny Ghemor (1), Mirror!Bashir (1), OC: Galen Bashir-Garak (1)

Some statistics:

(I'm excluding Tell Me You See Me for these, since most of it was posted in 2020)

Top 3 by hits: A Bag Full of God (1556), Quid Pro Quo (1238), Taking Steps Is Easy, Standing Still Is Hard (953)

Top 3 by kudos: Taking Steps Is Easy, Standing Still Is Hard (176), Quid Pro Quo (175), A Tone Which Is Now Forever Fled (159)

Top 3 by bookmarks: Taking Steps Is Easy, Standing Still Is Hard (24), Quid Pro Quo (23), Proper Procedure (14)

Top 3 by kudos/hits: Inimicus Inimici Mei (35.2%), When Fair Is Foul (34.4%), The Piano Man Comes to Quark’s (33.6%)

Top 3 by bookmarks/kudos: Taking Steps Is Easy, Standing Still Is Hard (13.6%), Press Your Advantage (13.2%), Quid Pro Quo (13.1%)

Clearly the big winner this year is Taking Steps Is Easy, Standing Still Is Hard, which came out on top in 3 categories and ranked 3rd in another. The kudos/hits stat is skewed in favor of fics with the lowest hit count, though it's rather nice to see that even though fewer people clicked on those fics, more of those who did liked what they read enough to leave kudos.

Biggest accomplishment: finishing my first novel-length fanfic, Tell Me You See Me! I'm honestly still a bit shocked that I managed it.

Most surprising fic: The two fics that really took me by surprise were The Piano Man Comes to Quark’s and Quid Pro Quo. They both just sort of jumped into my brain out of nowhere and then completely devoured it (and QPQ ended up being about 5 times longer than I'd envisioned). Piano Man is particularly strange, because I'm not musically inclined, haven't written much poetry since high school, and have never made a serious attempt at filk before. And I was even quite pleased with the result!

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