#and i fear it's only gonna get worse

[epavirees]

I'm sorry in advance for the person i'm about to become when the kärika song drops

#i'm already insane because of it #and i fear it's only gonna get worse #LIKE DO YOU GET IT THAT'S MY DREAM COLLAB #käärijä #erika vikman #neo.txt

[maevionart]

reading erha for the first time rn and i knew that jumping from mxtx novels to a meatbun danmei would be quite the change but holy fucking shit these mfs are traumatised

#i'm honestly feeling so much while reading #chapter 32 made me tear up holy shit #“without cwn he had nothing more to live for” ???? #man im gonna draw the hell out of these two #it's only gonna get worse i fear #2ha #erha #ranwan #danmei talk

[belpheg0r-luna]

The Magnus archives are giving me anxiety and not for the reason you might think so. Its just im not very good at remembering names and all this people are being re mentioned and im sitting there like an idiot waiting for jonathan to give me some hints

#im only 23 episodes in though #i fear its only gonna get worse #the magnus archives #tma #MAG 23 #jonathan sims #martin blackwood #belphegor luna

[0possil]

oh god. oh fuck. im shaking like a wet cat rn

so i watched episode 4 of the second season of good omens

what the hell. i have no words

im gonna need a therapist after this

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#crowley #ineffable husbands #good omens #aziraphale #i live in pain and fear #and i know its only gonna get worse #parker's good omens thoughts

[oblako]

she is just a girl who is so so scared </3

#i love yoo #x #the narrative is set up to make us hate her but i could never hate her <//3 #when it switched to their younger selves... that hurt 😔💔 #she was so scared then and she's still so scared now #so controlled by fear it influences everything she does and she keeps digging herself deeper and deeper into this hole #yui 'saved' her from one abusive environment only to put her into another abusive environment #took her out of one cage and put her into another #and alyssa views her as her savior #it's just so tragic bc alyssa is so unlikely to get a happy ending and it hurts my heart <//3 #someone please save this girl. but at this point who's gonna do it? #i have so many thoughts on alyssa and nol and their conversation #how they both just don't talk don't listen aren't honest with each other #and how similar yet different they are and how that's what makes them so incompatible #how the timing of the conversation couldn't possibly be worse!!! my god #alyssa went to nol bc she needed to be comforted by a friend and she doesn't really have anyone else #but at that point nol was so done pretending so done with his fake relationships #so hurt by her and on behalf of shinae as well #(and rightfully so) #it all just crashed and burned #alyssa really was doomed by the narrative from the very beginning #the tragedy of it all is just killing me 👍

[irritablepoe]

i really hope i'm not annoying you with my posts about ranpoe/poe btw bc it's not gonna stop anytime soon

#and i also fear it's only gonna get worse once i upload one specific chapter #i'm sorry in advance #that's some real angst shit right there >:3

[graciousdragon]

*walks in, covered in ash and emanating smoke, like a Looney Tunes character after surviving an explosion* hey guys i'm back

#rys.txt #uh. long ass tags that are mostly me venting below #second semester of college down and i think i did even worse than the first one #i've definitely failed at least one class but probably more than that. in fact i can only confidently say that i passed one class #i'm too scared to look at the grades on canvas. everything gets finalized on like. wednesday i think #i'm not getting worked up about it. my dad's gonna be pissed but you know what? i'm also pissed! #i am genuinely unable to focus on my work! i've genuinely tried everything i can think of to help and it has only barely helped! #every time i try to focus on my school work it feels like my brain just disconnects! no matter what the fuck i do! #and if i try to ask my dad for help he's like “just focus on your work” BITCH I TRIED! I'VE BEEN TRYING SO HARD! I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO! #so help me god i WILL be evaluated for adhd this summer otherwise i'm just not gonna fucking go back #MY BROTHER IN CHRIST THERE IS CLEARLY SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME AND THERE HAS BEEN FOR YEARS!! #SORRY YOU WERE NEVER AROUND AND NEVER INTERACTED WITH ME ENOUGH TO SEE IT!! SORRY I LEARNED TO MASK AROUND YOU FOR FEAR OF BEING TOLD OFF!! #ok. venting about my father in the tags aside. things are looking up for me now!! :D #school is over! i don't have to worry about that for another 4 months! my friends are back in town! i have time alone during the day! #I HAVE A DISC DRIVE FOR MY COMPUTER I CAN BURN CDS NOW!! I'M SO HYPE I'VE WANTED THIS FOR SO LONG #I'M LITERALLY GOING THROUGH THIS BIG BOX OF OLD CDS AND FLOPPY DISKS AND SHIT FROM OUR BASEMENT AND THERES BLANKS I CAN BURN!! #MY MENTAL HEALTH IS NO LONGER TOTALLY IN THE SHITTER BABY!! I'M BACK!!

[dutybcrne]

Concepts of Diluc somehow getting/having to keep the Pyro Gnosis and Kaeya being absolutely enraged at the gods over it & Kaeya getting caught up in some Abyss Order mess and Diluc goin absolutely fucken John Wick to get him back, my absolute beloveds-

#☆ ┆ ( .ooc. ); #//Fics and plot bunnies like that are fucken crack cocaine to me #//Its abt the loyalty and bond that is STILL THERE; even after everything; even after the years and changes #//Its abt seein yer estranged sworn brother get into a shitstorm; and knowing the situation is only gonna get worse for him & everyone Else #//& how despite the divide between them; despite how even as they are slowly mending and working through things again; the Instant #they see the other being actively doomed by the goddamn narrative; they go ‘I will undoom him myself or doom us both;so help me Celestia-‘ #//It’s abt them living up to the oath they swore to each other years ago; protecting eachother w everything they have; whatever the cost #//It’s abt them going ‘I turned my back on/hurt him before; I will NOT let that happen ever again. Not this time’ #//Anywho; I got inspo to finish a Thing I’d been working on nfbfb #//While also starting a whole OTHER thing #//No; Kae’s lil throwaway line in that one island event is NEVER gonna leave my brain #//I fear SO much for their story to continue; esp Kae’s jfbfb #//But also SO looking forward to it djfbfbb

[werebutch]

Ok goodnight I’ve been anxiety ridden over seemingly everything the past week or so to the point where my TUMMY won’t stop HURTING for ONE MINUTE the whole time. I’m scared I’m so scared of everuthing I’m scared

#my hrt appointment is on tues I’m scared. math I’m scared. socializing I’m scared. #will I ever stop feeling like I’m going to die whenever I hang out with people. like I thought this was stupid kid stuff but genuinely #makes my blood run cold sometimes just thinking about it. like I’m sooo special enough to be hated that much. get over urself. OMG #but I can’t. I think my problem is that I’m kind of a control freak and I have NO control over how people perceive me. not really #UGH SOOOO STUPID. even if it’s just going to get food or something. literally debilitating it’s horrible it like freezes me in place #being alone gets rid of the fear in the moment but I’ve been feeding that for like a couple years now. and the more I do the worse it gets #UGH. #I know the only way out is through but I’m gonna whine about it the entire time. why the hell is it so stressful for me.. even if I know #the person really likes me.. -__-

[widevibratobitch]

aaaaaaand it's starting. mom's bestie just texted me asking to come over this weekend cause it's Bad and it's probably the last chance to talk and maybe say goodbye to my mom's husband and i need to take care of her. god. i wont get through this weekend unless im high or drunk istg.

#time to slightly overdose my depression meds again ig lol #anyway. it is a little better with me these last two weeks. turns out the meds do work when you actually take em regularly #but first my best friend's break up that she's blowing up to unimaginable size #acting as if she just got divorced with the love of her life after 20 years #and not ended a few months long relationship with a guy who's been the source of most of her troubles since the moment they started dating #(ofc she's valid and id never tell her that because like. i get it. some people feel stuff more deeply. but its hard to be supportive #when you genuinely feel like this is the best possible outcome for her and that the relationship was only dragging her down all this time) #and now this. and this is gonna be infinitely worse. and then it's gonna get a million times worse when he actually does die. #and i feel like the worst most selfish person ever which like. probably am. but i did tell my cousin who actually knows my mom really well #and she said she understands and that my fears ARE valid because SHE'S terrified of how she's gonna handle my mom #and she wouldn't wanna be me in that situation cause it's gonna be so much worse for me lmao #like i feel like people who know my mother casually really dont understand just how unhinged emotionally she is #anyway. i feel so overwhelmed. i cant handle this jesus. #but im also emotionally unavailable and refuse to actually confide in another person because i dont want to be a bother <3333 #god i love tumblr. i can literally type anything in those tags lol it's the perfect form of venting since you can just scroll by #but i will still have let it out of myself anyway uwu i literally dont need that therapy fr #anyway. i feel so unbelievably fucking lonely and on one hand it's my own fault for withdrawing and refusing to ask for help. #but on the other hand. i AM alone. like there's no one who can help me in this particular situation. #i have no siblings. obviously my dad isnt gonna help. it all falls down to me. good god. i wanna throw up.

[seventh-district]

screaming shaking crying trembling wailing sobbing throwing up punching the wall in anguish and agony and angst etc etc etc

#Seven.txt #Seven’s Public Diary #cw vent post #kinda?? i guess?? #cw dentist #anyways yeah. i have to go to the dentist soon and i wanna throw up just thinking abt it #someone just fucking hit me with a tranq gun and get it over with already oh my god i don’t wanna do thisssssss #but don’t actually do that cause i would deadass revoke someone’s breathing privileges if they ever sedated me without my consent #that’s part of what i’m so afraid of. i don’t know what i’m gonna do if they say i have to be put under general anesthesia for this. #i will literally cry and run out of the building #so here’s hoping that they can just numb it and keep me awake #i need to stay awake for this man it’s the only way i can handle it. i don’t wanna be vulnerable like that. #hhhhhhh last time i was in a dentist chair i was shaking uncontrollably and it’s so embarrassing when my body does that shit #i’m so afraid it’s gonna be like that again cause my fear has gotten so much worse as i’ve put off going #but my father will be there with me so maybe my need to appear strong in front of him will override my body’s need to shake in fear lmao #so i’ve got someone to take me and i’ve thankfully got the money saved to afford it so realistically i shouldn’t be upset #but i am so so afraid and no amount of logic is gonna help me out here. i already know that #i just have to go do it like i have to force myself to do all the other things i’m afraid of #ugh. i can’t tell if i’m nauseous cause of the pain radiating from my jaw bone to my brow bone or if it’s anxiety #or if it’s cause i couldn’t eat last night. or all three. probably all three #i’ve never had any cavities or serious issues with my teeth before in my life so this is so so so new and scary and i hate it #but i want the pain to stop so i gotta get this fixed. and never eat anything with sugar or acid or anything ever again #and brush my teeth one million times a day so this doesn’t happen again #sighs and collapses on the floor. i guess i couldn’t run from the consequences of my mentally ill actions forever #also no for once i didn’t actually punch anything. that was just a figure of speech. and i’m in enough pain as it is rn lmao

[gregmarriage]

sideshow bob is the funniest fucker alive. his nemesis is a ten year old, who put him in jail for the crime he LITERALLY committed. he’s not above child murder, or just murder in general. he used to hate krusty, but apparently bart takes first place after he puts him in jail, again, for the crime he LITERALLY committed!! he’s insane <3

#love him getting mad when he literally did it imaoooo #i know it’s more the fact that he didn’t get away with the crime as he wanted to #also in cape feare when he’s sending threatening letters to bart #like sir first of all that’s a ten year old #second of all was he supposed to let you murder his aunt???? #there’s many bob eps and at this point it’s like is bob still mad about the original failed crime or is he mad for the whole stack of other #bart has stopped him from committing? #i think it’s the latter bc yeah bart is making it worse for himself in bob’s eyes but also he’s not gonna let bob get away with whatever #plan he’s got??? #especially when it’s murdering him or a family member #i can’t remember if there’s an episode which further explores his and krusty’s relationship and his jealousy of mel #i feel like he and mel should talk they have a lot in common ie. loving and idolising a man who treats them like shit #see: bob framing krusty in the first place bc he’d finally had enough #i suppose the only difference is mel always seems to go back #see: him claiming he won’t return for the comeback special but he still does anyways #it’s just an interesting dynamic krusty has with the sideshows that i feel should get explored more #like i love krusty but the whole point is he kinda sucks like he’s not super great at times but it’s sometimes glossed over #there’s nuance to the bob framing him stuff but nonetheless #am i making simpsons too deep? perhaps but 💁🏻‍♀️ #gwen rambles #gwenposting #simp(son) posting

[bloodyke]

next person to bring up project 2025 to fearmonger support for genocide joe is getting blown up i cannot stand you bitches

#zenith.txt #yall know NOTHING #you only have 1 talking point and its never worked #if you want people to vote you need to give them something to vote FOR not something to vote against or else all arguments are meaningless #second of all who the fuck do you think is currently laying the groundwork for project 2025? its literally biden #all the shit you fear is gonna happen is ALREADY STARTED UNDER HIS PRESIDENCY #third of all you all sound like fucking GHOULS when you say 'yeah genocide is bad but if we dont vote itll inconvenience ME this time' #what the fuck is wrong with you #joe biden will not get a second term that is a fact and it will be his own fault #if you guys ACTUALLY cared about these issues you would be mobilizing in your communities instead of yelling vote blue no matter who #its the fact that weve known about project 2025 for a whole year now but yall are only just now bringing it up bc people #are criticing biden more than ever and it scares you that your precious status quo is being challenged #legitimately fuck all of you trying to weaponize the fears of marginalized communities #the privilege in saying that under repubs things will get worse... #itll get worse FOR YOU. all of the things you worry about finally affecting YOU are literally already fucking happening #to black and brown (particularly black and brown disabled people) for DECADES #and im saying this from a place of privilege being white myself #yes i am a gay disabled puerto rican but i am white first and have been able to for the most part avoid a lot of the shit that has been #KILLING my family and the people in my communities #all of the things youve been saying will happen in project 2025 are things i have already fucking watched happen to the people around me #the only difference between now and this hypothetical project 2025 is now it will effect white people too #and thats the only reason yall even fucking care about it because now YOUR life is going to terrible and YOU cannot ignore it anymore #everything you criticized trump for biden and his team also does. #yall are so fucking pathetic wringing your hands and spouting the lie of electoralism but you refuse to do anything #that could enact meaningful change beacuse the point is you guys dont actually want change #the only thing yall want is to have people stop talking about all of this so you can continue to walk around with your head down #and not be inconvenience in your daily life bc you actually enjoy the status quo #saying you have to vote for the wolf in sheeps clothing over the wolf is not fucking better they are the exact same thing #and its time yall opened your fucking eyes to the world around you #'i domt support genocide but-' THERE IS NO BUT HERE.

[aroace-poly-show]

oh that’s not good

#marlo’s stuff #ya’ll i think i’m gonna throw up #ohhh the horrors #<- anxiety. #really really bad #i am. scared i think. #for such a STUPID reason too #so so stupid #and yet it is completely fucking me over right now #me when i have stupid irrational fears of stuff that was in the past and shouldn’t matter now and yet the fear never ever leaves #and only gets worse as time goes on #hhaahahadhfs #vent

[taegularities]

RID WHAT IS GOING ON WITH JUNGKOOK?!? I’m screaming I am afraid for my life😭😭 he decided it’s time to end us all or something🫠

ella, my dear........ i'm afraid u're right

#i fear it's only gonna get worse bcos these are just.... just teasers #good luck to us all we can do it </3 #notes for rid 🌹 #ella <3

[tiixij]

I need to meet some transgender gay communists irl nowwww

#thinking abt contacting the ml group on campus when the semester starts but also. hmmm the terrors (entirely irrational anxiety that I can't #do anything about) #It's so fucked up how I can tell myself exactly why I don't need to be worried about basic things but then it just makes the anxiety worse #Also meds haven't helped and neither has therapy so. Like what am I supposed to do? Live in fear and die alone? #I'm not upset rn btw I'm just really really annoyed #Like the only thing that works for me is actually doing the thing a few times like getting used to it or whatever #But the only way I'm able to do that is if I'm with someone in familiar with but literally the only people in familiar with are my parents. #So basically. I can only do things with my mom like I'm a toddler or something #Okay now I'm a little upset bc I'm thinking about how I haven't had any irl friends in like. Five years?? #And even then I never spent time with any of them outside of school once they all started making other friends and then it turned out I was #incapable of doing that! #Okay whatever I'm gonna try to get back to sleep now -_-