#and how he interacts with their lack of formal education

[bambiraptorx]

Part One

Draxum and Mikey:

Similarly to Raph, Draxum struggles quite a bit at first with adjusting to Mikey's nigh-on ridiculous learning speed. However, Mikey's main 'barrier', so to speak, is that scheduling specific times for lessons as Draxum prefers to do doesn't work well for him. Sometimes it works out, and Mikey progresses in leaps and bounds, but other times when his focus is exhausted? Sure, he can kind of force himself to pay attention during their lessons, but that only works so well and for so long. It is not, by any means, an effective way to learn.

The real issue isn't Mikey's ability or potential to learn, but that he's never really had to learn how to consistently engage with something even when he doesn't feel like it. He's never really had to force himself to keep working on something when he isn't really feeling it. Which isn't inherently a negative trait, but it makes it harder for Draxum to teach him, as Draxum has most definitely learned how to force himself to do things and doesn't immediately realize that that's not a universal thing.

The problem Draxum has here isn't so much about getting Mikey to focus, but rather not only figuring out how to create an environment that is continually engaging enough that Mikey can focus, but also knowing when to just call it quits. Some days are fantastic, others just don't work out for training, and there's nothing wrong with that. He might end up kinda just showing Mikey a wide range of the ways that mystic powers can be used and hoping that some of it sticks.

Draxum and Leo:

This might seem a be counter intuitive, but Leo is actually the one who Draxum can train most effectively (at least, given the specific context of Minor Interference). See, based on the point in time that this story diverges from canon, Leo is still struggling to figure out how his powers work and, although he doesn't want to admit it, deeply insecure about his place on the team because of that.

That, combined with his tendency to latch onto paternal figures (see: Jupiter Jim and Tim Dunkman) means that Leo actually really does want to learn from Draxum and sort of starts looking up to him. "Sort of" being the key phrase here, as Leo doesn't want to admit to himself that he craves the approval Draxum happens to be offering. So Leo wants to learn from Draxum, but at the same time, he doesn't want to get too close, if that makes sense.

On Draxum's end, Leo's training is the easiest (at least in terms of technique) because Draxum is teaching him a skill set that he himself actively uses: portals. Draxum knows from first hand experience how tricky portals can be to use and how hard they are to learn, so he actually has more reasonable expectations for Leo than Leo himself does.

However, what makes training Leo difficult is that Leo continually ignores the safety rules Draxum tries to teach him. This is partly because Leo's already broken most of those rules with little to no consequences and doesn't see why it's such a big deal, but also because he can tell it's extremely frustrating for Draxum when he breaks those rules.

What Leo doesn't really realize is that Draxum's frustration comes from a place of concern about his wellbeing, because portals can be very, very dangerous, especially when you're as reckless with them as Leo is. You can get lost somewhere, you can get portal-jacked, you could portal chop yourself, etc. Portals are not a form of magic to be taken lightly, and Leo's a bit too cavalier about how he uses them.

#rottmnt #rottmnt au #minor interference au #minor interference lore #rottmnt baron draxum #rottmnt mikey #rottmnt leo #michelangelo hamato #leonardo hamato #rise of the tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #as i said in the tags of part one #a lot of how draxum ends up training the turtles becomes highly dependent on how his neurodivergencies interact with theirs #and how he interacts with their lack of formal education #no shade to splinter whatsoever because he had literally no resources for teaching his kids #but like. he probably left them to fend for themselves education wise after a while #like how is splinter (a rat man in the sewers) supposed to homeschool his kids when he can barely even go to a public library? #at some point i think he just let them figure out how to teach themselves about their interests like cooking circuitry etc #not to mention that he may or may not have the knowledge and background needed to effectively homeschool four kids #but that's another can of worms entirely

[atinyladybug-art]

Dr Abirt Kravitz [Updated version]

Hello here is the long awaited reference to my 963 Rewrite named Dr Abirt Kravitz! [Here is the old version <- The fun facts from here hasn't changed and is still canon.]

She uses any pronouns! She's too old and overworked to give a shit how you refer to/perceive her.

He's O5-7 aka 'The Eternal'. He's been around for more than 3 centuries. A historian but also enjoys archaeology and linguistics. His responsibilities on the council are the Foundation's Housing system (due to his past as personnel director) as well as a slight hand in Foundation Educations.

I drew a lot of inspiration from Phosphophyllite in Houseki No Kuni / Land Of The Lustrous for my SCP-963 and also Abirt's concept in general. Something something Ship Of Theseus thing going on over there.

I'm also rewriting the entire family into the Kravitz family. The AU for them is called Recollection AU and you can look at Rec AU's lore here <- link to Toyhouse!

Abirt does have a tumblr rp blog called @seven-pink-glasses but the things on there aren't 100% canon (especially with the character interaction) but it does peek a lil into Abirt's daily life + shenanigans!

Also if you're interested in Abirt things, they're all tagged under #Abirt Kravitz. The AU this is from is #Recollection AU where non-Abirt stuff is at. #The Kravitz Family is for the entire family stuff

Texts from the first image under the cut:

Dr Abirt Kravitz || 'The Eternal'

O5 Council member (O5-7)

Genderfluid. Jewish Origin. Age unknown though is rumoured to be above 3 centuries. Varying appearance but is fond of jewelry. Word says they're immortal due to a cursed bloodline.

O5-7 plays a major role in personnel and housing, and a minor one in Foundation education. Big on mentoring too. Many personnel were handpicked and taught by her.

Most know him for his lack of formalities and fatherly tendencies but is also easily irritable and holds personnel to a high standard.

(Summarised from The Black Queen's report)

Scp-963 Description:

A teardrop-shaped gemstone made of amber approximately 3.5cm in length. Within it contains a piece of unidentified flora from The Land Where No Name Is Spoken .

Heals and regenerates any injuries by replacing flesh and bone with amber and resin. Foreign limbs introduced to him will be reconnected and transformed to its former state.

Sometimes the amber and tree resin in xer body hardens, causing mobility issues. Frequently switches mobility aids.

#alt draws #abirt kravitz #scp #scp foundation #amuletverse #scp 963 rewrite #recollection au #the kravitz family #ref sheet #scp oc #long post #dr kravitz

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

"Bonjour, dear Headmage!" Rook's voice resonates before the hunter appears out of seemingly nowhere, like usual. "Don't mind me, I just couldn't help but need to sate my curiosity. After all, for how long you've been here, not much is known about you. Where you're from, what's the extent of your powers, ce genre de choses (things like that). I'm not the only one curious, even: a little rose mentioned something along those lines during an impromptu visit of yours truly to his Alchemy class."

I believe the asker is referring to a voice line that Riddle has when Crowley drops into Alchemy for a Special Lesson. He wonders what kind of magic the headmaster must use--though knowledge of this line isn't necessary to enjoy this interaction.

Enter; An Unkindness of Ravens.

It's odd, Rook had concluded, that he cannot discern anything meaningful about Crowley. It’s unlike the huntsman to be lacking in information, in details—but when it came to him, it became a jumbled mess. Unknown birthday, unknown home country, unknown past and powers. No records in any textbooks or formal documentation he could find.

All that was known was the name, occupation, height and weight. The bare basics. Hardly anything to work off of.

Rook regarded Crowley with curious eyes carved into emerald crescents. He provided his brightest smile, his warmest voice. He was a hunter laying out a nasty snare for his prey.

“By all means, I invite you to elucidate. I would personally love to learn more of our dearly beloved headmaster and his long and most illustrious career.”

“It seems as though my students have been gossiping about me once again… even my most studious boys!” Crowley mumbled to himself. (Rook’s hypersensitive ears had no issues picking up his words.) “Dear me, I’m too popular for my own good!!”

Then, addressing Rook in full, “I understand that you are all dying to know more about your dashing, intelligent, highly competent headmaster—however, prying into the personal matters of your teachers is not necessary to your pursuit of a magic education. I ask that you grant your instructors and myself our much-needed privacy.

“Adult matters are just that: adult matters! One day you will understand when you, too, get to be of that age.”

Rook's brows pinched ever so slightly. It's as though the briefest of clouds has passed by the sun, drowning out its light--but it returned, the momentary shift imperceptible to the naked eye.

“Je suis désolé,” he said, lowering into an apologetic bow. "I will mind my words when speaking to my superiors."

"Good, good! I shall be off, then. There are important snacks--" Crowley stopped and hurriedly corrected himself. "Erm, I mean important paperwork in my office which I must attend to. Enjoy the rest of your day, my student!"

The headmaster turned and started to make his way out of the courtyard. His back, exposed.

When the arrow came flying at his head, Crowley didn't flinch, didn't move--didn't have to. It froze midair, nowhere near its intended target, then dropped to the ground. A second later, a crystalline shield flickered into view, then vanished again.

Oh là là!

Rook's heart leapt with excitement. His interest, piqued.

Crowley craned his head back at him.

"Oops! Slip of the hand," the huntsman chuckled, not sounding so innocent with his excuse. He made no effort to hide the bow and a quiver he had somehow produced from his robes.

Bait left out to lure him in.

“Careful, Hunt-kun,” Crowley tuts, wagging a finger. “I may be a kind man, but even my kindness has its limits. I assure you, you do not wish to incur my wrath."

The headmaster--it was the same headmaster, harmless as ever, but... His shadow, it seemed to stretch along the path, taking on a new sinister shape. A monstrous raven, beak full of dagger-like teeth and blood-red eyes.

A chilling thrill bolted through Rook.

"That man seems so preoccupied with trivial matters," Riddle had once said. "It's difficult to believe he is a formidable mage."

Non, Roi des Roses. It appears that our headmaster is, in fact, quite the formidable mage indeed.

"... Bien sûr." Rook knelt, laying his bow and arrows on the ground. "You have my word. No more trickery or deception, fufu."

"Excellent! I'm glad we understand each other," Crowley chirped with the twirl of his cane. "Because I am so very generous, I shall overlook this transgression and allow you to be on your merry way."

He taped his lips together and whistled as he walked off. A cheery tune lifted up into the air like a bird taking flight.

Rook silently marveled at the beauty--and horror--of it.

#twst #twisted wonderland #Dire Crowley #Rook Hunt #disney twisted wonderland #disney twst #Two Ravens at the Writing Desk #twst interactions #twisted wonderland interactions #Riddle Rosehearts

[vigilskeep]

Dunno if this this ask makes much sense, but how do you suppose Irving’s favoritism looks day to day? Barring extreme circumstances like Anders’ escapes from Kinloch Hold…I imagine it’s probably just additional responsibility and tutorship, but I also doubt Anders would have agreed with that so maybe it depends on the individual? Maybe with some mages he thinks are promising he’ll intervene, but otherwise leave them alone? Idk

ok SO

while i have compared the two to make funney posts, there is actually a distinction between irving's Anders Style Favouritism Behaviour and his Mage Warden Style Favouritism Behaviour. irving's favouritism to anders is notable in comparison to his lack of preference for someone like jowan, clearly seeing one as dangerous and to be sacrificed for the greater good, and the other as harmless and charming and generally of value/salvageable. (irving's all or nothing perspective towards blood magic comes into play here.) irving was "endeared" to him, and it was irving who "in particular looked upon anders with sympathy", counselled the templars to make allowances for him, and warned him against going too far after karl was sent away, because at some point he would no longer be able to protect him. the style of day-to-day interaction during anders' circle days is probably shown in this from irving's codex: "he can soothe templars angered by some childish magical prank at the same time that he lauds the pranksters, and everyone walks away satisfied." irving probably let him get away with a lot when it was harmless, and his fondness shows in his continued efforts to protect a troublemaker who had been trying to flee the circle since he arrived. it's clear that he cared about the kid! and continued to care about him no matter anders' less than grateful response, even after everything: "when asked if he regretted not punishing anders more severely, perhaps with tranquillity, irving only sighed and would not discuss the matter further."

but i emphasise that irving cared because all of this is more of a personal attachment, simply an interest taken in, and a fondness for, a young mage of the circle who happened to by nature stood out. it's not suggested that anders necessarily had the specific, formal relationship or day-to-day interaction that irving and the mage warden have: mentor and apprentice. in kinloch hold, each apprentice has a specific mentor; keili mentions her mentor, you meet wynne's apprentice during her personal quest, various ambient dialogue mages discuss their mentor or their apprentice, etc. etc. and because they are the specialest little guy, amell/surana's mentor is the first enchanter himself! irving has talked about your progress personally to loghain himself prior to ostagar, wynne can potentially say at ostagar "you advanced so quickly in your training that irving never sent you to work under me" (i imagine this is suggesting wynne helps tutor most young mages), people like uldred refer to you as "irving's star pupil", duncan says "i am sure irving is very proud to have had you as a pupil", irving of course personally recommends you to the wardens and ensures your recruitment, etc. etc.

while i imagine the mage warden had many other teachers, as irving is responsible for the entire tower and also not the most powerful mage in it for a star student to learn from, irving would presumably be primarily responsible for the mage warden's education. it would be irving they went to for tutorship or if they had any difficulties. keili says that her mentor allows only a certain amount of time a day for religious contemplation, so they clearly have authority over their apprentices' daily life and curriculum. irving after all says to the mage warden after the harrowing "take your time to rest, or study in the library. the day is yours", and i would imagine he usually has more specific plans for them to... do more studying in the library. (it's kinloch, what else are you going to do?) i very much doubt irving's teaching was just magic, too! irving is a competent mage, but his greatest skills and primary interests are administration and diplomacy. there's a reason people keep recognising you as irving's favoured student; he's setting you up to be a political player, and he's the one who successfully organises you becoming a grey warden. i imagine any mage warden would have a grounding in the associated skills

it is of course up to the player's choice whether irving's favouritism for the mage warden would have also had to involve smoothing things over with the templars like he did for anders. it may also be up for hc whether anders was indeed his apprentice too; to my knowledge there's no information on a specific mentor for anders, though considering the detail with which world of thedas covers their relationship it seems odd that being his primary teacher wouldn't come into it. it's not necessarily required for anders' mentor to have been a fellow spirit healer/creation specialist, as it's not like the mage warden was specialised when they finished their apprenticeship or like they have to follow any of irving's magical preferences, so that's no reason he couldn't be. (i checked and irving actually does have more spells in creation than any other school. i'm not going to analyse that spell list too hard right now because we could genuinely be here forever.) i would assume that circle mages only tend to specialise after their apprenticeship is completed anyhow, kind of like how you'd only do a degree after you finish high school. also because, you know. why invest in specialist training before you know if the kid's going to make it through the harrowing, am i right

as an aside it kind of alters irving's vibe a lot what kind of mage warden you play. but i think it's very interesting that he clearly cared about anders and that he is so invested in the mage warden and publicly proud of their talent regardless of whether they're loyal or defiant, studious or disobedient, amell or surana

#this got very distracted but i hope the answer you're looking for is in here somewhere #irving #warden amell #warden surana #anders #sorry. this is SO distracted. im reading back through it now. i fucking love talking about these guys. anyway [hits post button] #zevsurana academics

[nicki0kaye]

random kallus hc inspired by someone else's post #3

I think getting him to socialize will be like pulling teeth. It obvs depends on how you interpret his few lines in season 4, but I don't think he was doing the bond villain voice as a joke when he greeted the Spectres. I think he's just like that.

And I think he knows it's off-putting, and is using that as a shield of sorts so he doesn't have to go too far into the unknown after entirely uprooting his life and leaving the Empire.

the explanation I always come back to is 'be what they expect', like that's his strategy within the Rebellion. This is important bc my main hc for Kallus is that everything about his presentation is fake. His accent and cadence was taken from the big bad in a show he liked as a tween. His only formal education is from the Academy, so he lacks a lot of standard knowledge others take for granted. He was an entirely different person before entering the Empire (though it was the Republic at his time of enlistment), and even though he's been in character for the last 20-ish years, there's nothing stopping him from constructing a new one. Nothing but himself and his goals.

Now there's also the comfort aspect. Creating a whole new life is terrifying, and I do think there's a measure of comfort he takes for having 'valid reasons' for not reinventing himself. He's also been shaped by the Empire (and his life before, as a gang lord's son) to expect the worst of people--to make formalities weapons, to always expect the knife in the back, to take any opportunity to tear someone else down so he can rise higher. That's created a paranoid, hyper-alert state re: other people, and the people of the Rebellion have every reason to distrust and ostracize him bc of his past as an ISB officer.

All of this is to say, 'be what they expect' is both a strategy to lessen the friction between him and the Rebellion, and also as a means of protecting his own sense of stability. Changing shit up now could draw unwanted attention, give Rebels cause to distrust his goals and intentions, call into question who he is what he's capable of, and ultimately would be taxing and anxiety inducing for him.

I think he's a proud guy who doesn't do shit in half measures, and that means taking 'failure' very seriously, including social failure. If he's a stuck up asshole ex-Imp, he's not gonna win anyone over, which means he won't feel bad or like he's fucked up if no one likes him much. He's setting himself up for failure as a means of controlling the situation, bc he is very out of his depths and hyper aware of what a mistake could cost.

that isn't to say I don't love hcs where he loosens the sphincter and genuinely tries to socialize and make nice, I fucking adore those, I just think getting him there would be a process. He's a recovering perfectionist, he's gonna need the help.

I also just...look, one of my criteria for imprinting on a character is how likely they are to sit there with a neutral expression while mentally furiously playing 4D chess against themselves and their perceived opponent re: literally any social interaction. I love the mfs who look like they have their shit together but in reality are one misstep away from a meltdown over 'failing' at being a human. It's the autistic people pleaser in me.

and I love the idea of that person being worth saving. That they can bond and find love and friendship and learn to be better at this shit. I like exploring that process, warts and all. I like forcing them to admit they need other people, they want other people, even if it scares them shitless.

There's a song from the musical Company called 'Being Alive' that reminds me a lot of what I feel is the core driving force for Kallus' change. It starts with the character more or less listing all the reasons love sucks, actually, but there's a turn midway where he starts begging for all these little inconveniences because; "Alone is alone, not alive"

And I think Kallus is deeply embarrassed that he feels that way. That for all the perfectly understandable reasons to hate the Empire, he ultimately changed because he was tired of being alone and wanted to be alive. So there's also this layer of penance and self-denial that is informed by his guilt for all he's done, but is ultimately him punishing himself for wanting something so selfish and being so 'weak'.

He hasn't earned friends yet. He doesn't deserve to be loved. He has so much evil to make up for, so much work to do, it'd just be a distraction, and worse a selfish distraction.

And there's reason to consider him an inherently selfish character, I think it should probably be applied to him more, it's a much more realistic take on him, but I personally prefer the obnoxious martyrism of it all. That he's able to flip his morals because they were, ultimately, a put-on anyway. That he is aware of right and wrong and his ability to empathize hasn't withered into nothing after years of violence and cruelty. And even if he can't feel empathy as strongly as he once could, he is at least hyper aware he now runs with a crowd that draws strength from empathy and needs to readjust himself accordingly.

So I guess even if he is still talking and acting like a bond villain, he is tailoring his words and actions to suit the Rebel's sensibilities. And I think he's hyper aware that's a choice--that other people (like Zeb) are just naturally care about the right things and treating others the right way. That he's already deceiving them in a way, which inherently makes him a two-faced liar, and it would just make things messy if he added to that deceit by acting personable and kind and understanding. It's so important the Rebels trust him, so important that they not question his intel and motivations, so it just makes sense that he not push too far and make it obvious he can be anyone. That he could mirror them perfectly, say exactly what they want to hear just how they want to hear it.

No one knows he's a fake person, so he has to keep the mask on. He has to stay in his little ex-imp box and put the real reasons he defected on the back-burner so that this under-funded, over-worked, run-on-shoe-laces-and-hope band of misfits don't die on his watch.

And i really like it when he's proven wrong, and forced to abandon the box and face the horrible ordeal of being known better than he knows himself.

#kallus #nik v sw

[altocat]

Take this with a handful of salt cause its been like 3-4 years since i took this class and things have probably changed or i could be misremembering. Anyways, i was in a child development class and one thing that we were taught that is very important to a child’s development as just a functional human being is being talked to and interacted with ie being held and feeding whether by bottle or not.

Pretty sure that’s also common knowledge you gotta talk to infants but yeah.

I would honestly be surprised if Sephiroth wasn’t interacted with and talked to as an infant. We start learning language and interaction in some capacity or form when we are born and Sephiroth doesn’t have any issues with language. And from how he speaks, (and i think we all assume this anyways and also the halloween event) he was probably surrounded by scientific and formal speech from the very beginning. I would also assume he wasn’t really read any stories as a baby/child more so based on how he interacts with the trio in tfs. He doesn’t know what fun feels like and that tells me he doesn’t really have much of an imagination to make his own fun since stories are how we form a lot of our early imagination. And toys but i think this is getting into wild speculation lol

Sorry if this is long winded or comes off weird. This has been on my mind for a while

Sephiroth strikes me as someone with a lot of social delays, likely brought on by how he was raised.

I do believe that Gast was likely the only really positive caregiver he could have had. I think it was a communication heavy environment (orders), but not an emotionally nurturing one. Sephiroth was probably given directives to follow from an early age, but his emotional needs weren't being met at all. He barely even knows what's out there in the real world beyond war. He's studious and well read, so he's clearly educated. But he lacks the positive experiences necessary to form a whole person. It just reads to me that his childhood environment was cold and clinical and more focused on goals and results and data instead of the here and now social and emotional aspects that form a healthy childhood.

Sephiroth is a sad case. He's brilliant in so many areas, yet delayed in others. Incredibly tactical and focused, but also immature and guileless.

#asks #ff7 #ffvii #final fantasy 7 #sephcanons #sephiroth #crisis core

[minecraftbookshelf]

How to Become the King of Mythland

(For Dummies)

Since I already made the posts for the Roseblings, I figured I'd go ahead and write the one for the third core member of the WRA. (I am still accepting suggestions for who to do next for this series, so far I've done Pix, the Seablings, and the Roseblings)

The usual copy+paste of Relevant Notes to start...

Also a general note relevant to the succession criteria of the majority of the empires. Remember this whole thing, where Pix kind of accidentally changed the formal definition of war in the empires? That had a lot of implications for how royalty functioned in the Empires. While they still absolutely have internal duties and responsibilities and privileges, ultimately their most important job is that they stand ready to defend their empire and its people at all times. Part of this is that they also function as international ambassadors in a way, while most empires also have official ambassadors, the relationships and interactions between the emperors themselves are a very important (sometimes volatile) facet of international relations. A country cannot be recognized internationally as an autonomous nation without an official Emperor/Head of State.

Mythland is one of the oldest mortal realms, neck and neck with Helianthia (the exact order there is a hotly debated point) it's population is about equal parts human and hybrid and, like the Grimlands, it is not uncommon to find faint traces of various fae ancestries among the populace.

It is not the largest kingdom, but it is one of the strongest. And is famed for its beautiful and efficient infrastructure.

Mythland is one of the empires with a more "traditional" monarchy, traced through bloodline. The current royal family, House Sausage, has held the throne for about ten or twelve generations.

Since the advent of the role of royalty changing, the heirs to the throne have undergone a slightly altered education, culminating in a "final exam"/"quest" in which they are required to meet certain requirements to prove their worth to inherit the crown and defend the empire and its people.

Usually after their quest is completed and they have officially graduated from their (rigorous) military training, they have a few years to focus on less martial elements of education before their parent abdicates and passes on the crown, but in Sausage's case his parents were assassinated at the same time as the Count of the Grimlands, and he was crowned shortly thereafter, the very day after his parents were buried.

(Yes, there was a coordinated attack on several rulers at once, yes this is relevant to several of their backstories. This is also when Pearl became Queen of Helianthia.)

And obviously this kind of trauma and lack of time and space to grieve properly had no negative effects on Mythical J Sausage whatsoever. :)

-

AU Masterpost

#empires smp #mythland #empires s1 #mythical j sausage #there is a reason the mortal-majority kingdoms mostly have young rulers who are all right about the same age #rain rambles #marriage of state au #mos: worldbuilding #mos: mythland #mos: sausage

[ranboo5]

Math headcanons because I am sane and normal

- Ranboo (sourced in part from the orphan^2 joke) like, has some handle on arithmetic operations from Being Around, the lab, etc. He would do well in a good math class – they have the analytical/pattern analysis brain enough + are curious in the ~right direction that a well presented/explained could probably teach them without much trouble – but they never got that bc they never had reason to be taught it nor to seek it out, so right now like their knowledge gets mostly fuzzy around exponents etc.. He knows they Exist but doesn't have a solid grasp on their mechanics or purpose. He has a 40% chance of recalling how to do long division at any given time

- Techno on the other hand is canonically ~educated right like even if you take the English major bit as ccbleed joke he still like, directly interacts with and frames himself in character thru the lens of a character that ~has education in Literary Analysis. Techno definitely Went To School and I can pretty easily see him doing OK in math class. He has not retained Any of this though – these days a lot of stuff is like "OK I know there's a way to do this that I learned at some point . But I don't recall what it is ."

- Phil is not fluent in standard math notation at all and was probably never formally taught, certainly not well. If you ask him he will be like Oh I'm fuckin useless at math I'm not smart like that lol. This is because Philza Minecraft undervalues himself as his day job. He has a great intuition for applied math and the lack of notation knowledge is ~a strength for stuff like doing pretty easy conversions between counting bases (esp base 8); he has a great sense of magnitude and some great methods of estimation and a sense for first principle calculus and applied trig in the sense of like He's Observed And Derived a lot of these. He doesn't have them in formulas but like he can sensically estimate distances off trig angles, recognize what ~kind of rate of change he's looking at, etc.. Meanwhile peerpress are trying to calculate the tip and Techno is frowning at the receipt remembering there's a really simple way to do this – maybe another day he would've even remembered the "move the decimal point" thing but it's escaping him rn – and Ranboo is two sheets of scratch paper in to trying to re-derive long division. He is failing.

[artemisia-black]

I really like the way you write the Blacks, because you don’t shy away from their(many lol) flaws, but you also write them in a way that makes them super entertaining. They’re so wrapped up in their own beliefs and old fashioned that the entire family comes across as deeply absurd. (And in Pietas I like how Aeliana definitely sees that and how it affects her thoughts and interactions with them).

Also their formal attitudes become even more absurd when you read about them as kids/teenagers, because most people that age are not that formal at all and so it just becomes sort of ridiculous to see someone like Regulus or a young Orion act that way lol

Aww thank you so much.

Part of the reason, I write them being observed by this other pureblood family is because I see them as so emotionally constipated and so proud that they lack introspection/self-awareness.

In Pietas, the Marcellus' are elitists who also believe in their own inherent superiority (based on their last name) and want to prevent the education of muggle-borns as it upsets their 'traditions' (they also have their own family dysfunction). But they are also loving and indulge in hobbies and when in their own home aren't performing an act of superority at all times. Dalia Marcellus (who isn't exactly mother of the year) even calls the Blacks out for it.

Ironically for how much they berate Sirius, they are the ones who (in the eyes of Aeliana) are coming across as really odd. Regulus certainly is bordering on creepy (especially as he's only spoken to her twice).

#lovely tumblr friends #the blacks are ridiculous #and I think that gets lost sometimes #they are self agrandising #and that lends itself to absurdity

[balladofthewhitehorse]

14, 19, 28, and 46 for whomever you'd like!

Thank you for your ask! I appreciate it, I’ll answer these with England (and others, depending on my muse which is- fickle. Love how my brain can spend an hour and a half researching a singular event in Irish history, but not even lift a neuron to glance at my still unfinished fics).

Were they involved at school? Sports? Clubs? Debate? Were they unconnected?

This is a kind of hard one to answer given the lack of a curriculum or even any formal schooling outside of the clergy in the Anglo-Saxon era (the era I consider England to be spawned into like some shrub come to life); He would’ve mostly learned hands on from his father and his brother, learning how to defend himself and speak latin (Wessex would’ve most likely taught how to write in runic, with England learning how to write latin later on during Alfred the Great’s reign, who’s known for promoting education during the Saxon times and proposing for primary education to be conducted in English - making it more accessible to the those that weren’t just clergy or nobility, most likely).

The same would go for Scotland and Wales (in their own respective languages too, with Wales obviously learning Cymraeg while Scotland learned Gaelic and later on Scots as the language developed); All three of them are more familiar with learning skills as they go, far better with their hands than anything else. England even had a short while with Normandy learning French (and of all things, embroidery, mostly from sitting with France who acted as a bit of an impromptu babysitter whenever Normandy was away or too busy to focus on this new territory he’d gained).

The idea of sitting at a desk, listening to the teacher tell you things is a bit of a Victorian thing.

That. Is exactly what Northern Ireland is very familiar with: The poor mite was often a bit of an odd-one-out, initially homeschooled until Ireland decided it might be better for him to interact with people…more his age (or at least looking more his age). He did find it hard to connect, it is not uncommon for England, Scotland and Wales to forget that Northern Ireland at his core, no matter how youthful, that he is a nation. Northern Ireland had a bit of a tendency to flare up or argue with others, known to the teachers as a bit of a trouble-maker - which, of course: Scotland, Wales, England and Ireland all simultaneously gave one another the side-eye, wondering just where that came from.

The reality of it is that Northern Ireland is a deeply empathetic individual - and he’s very aware of all the little things that stop him from being allowed to simply exist. He takes part in the football club (but of course,) and the rugby club - as well as Irish hurling, mostly because it’s something he and Ireland can do together (like it or lump it, Ireland is probably the closest to understanding N. Ireland than anyone else here). Northern Ireland is prone to thinking his problems are very, very small compared to the others - it is hard to get a word in edgewise when they won’t stop talking about this or that battle (England, in particular, seems to have zero remorse about casually remarking on his father’s death occuring right in front of him).

But, nations have a way of feeling the impact of things on their land; Physical, Mental…it’s all the same to them, and Northern Ireland is a student throughout all of this…sucks, innit?

What were your character’s deepest disillusions? In life? What are they now?

England? England? England hasn’t even begun to crawl entirely from his disillusions.

The first one is the fact Wales doesn’t consider him a brother anymore. It was quite the shock when he realized, and initially England was very defensive; He was quick to push the blame onto her and spew vitriol. In recent years, it’s…better between them, but England always feels subtly disappointed that they’re not as close as they used to be - and well, all signs point to England as the main reason why, which…

Is the second disillusion. England is not a pleasant person to know; His actions have reasons, they’re guided by (twisted) morality and it’s not surprising that he’s like this. Yet, it must be said that England does not recognise himself as the villain, does not immediately connect the dots that all the things that have happened between then and now with Scotland and Wales, are entirely because of him. Spite, bitterness, loss…certainly, Scotland and Wales had their moments (Wales did ambush England in the midst of a forest and nearly decapitate him, but to be fair, England was invading her), but England was slow on the uptake to say the least and extremely arrogant, with…quite frankly alarming conceptions of what family and protection were - Normandy wasn’t exactly the grandest role model, but it’s not enough to wash England of the blood. He realizes this now, of course, and it’s a great shame - but perhaps the next disillusion is most likely…

The idea that he can never get better. It seems foreign to him that he could get better; He seems almost content to stew and it’s…tiring, frustrating trying to change when you know things are never going to go back to before. England struggles with the concept, with the satisfaction of retribution denied; Scotland and Wales are not going to retaliate, they are not going to seek revenge on him - nor is anyone else, and this deeply unsettles England who is all too familiar with the old adage of an eye for an eye, and a knife for the ribs.

As for the disillusions of the past, I will quickly two below:

The idea that Normandy cared for him as more than a vassal: England took a long time to come to terms with the fact his brotherhood was less than ideal and it was unfair of Normandy to have just left him with France, though at this point England was already winding up to fight with her, vicious and dog-toothed.

The idea that France was little more than a villain; For a long time, he tucked away any pleasant memories that had been shared between them - England had a tendency to think in shades of black and white back then, viewing France as an oppressor in its entirety. To him, she seemed to be a grown-up - but now, England views such a time as the feuding between two children; One of which was only a little older than the other.

Who is your character’s mate? How do they relate to him or her? How did they make their choice?

Hmm, I’ll answer this one for Scotland because I think it’s a tad easier with Scotland in comparison to Wales and England; He’s quite introverted for the most part, preferring peace and quiet in comparison to more social pursuits, but Scotland does have one close friend: Ireland. Obvious answer, but it just makes so much sense. While certainly they’ve had their ups and downs, with Scotland not always seeing eye to eye with Ireland (they are two individuals after-all, and there are plenty of situations where Scotland did not always do right by her - do please remember Scotland’s role in the Ulster Plantations/British Empire), but fundamentally they have each others back these days.

Scotland and Ireland have almost the same neuroses; Scotland doesn’t like insects while Ireland feels queasy about the prospect of mould, and so they tend to be very clean about their spaces around them. They’re also quite similar in humour, being very dry and quick-witted, with Ireland often affectionately teasing Scotland (‘’William Wallace wasn’t a drag queen-’’ ‘’He’s wearing a skirt and has a full face of foundation, Scotland’’ - Derry Girls, 2022). It’s not uncommon for some people to assume they’re dating, but Scotland is an AroAce icon and Ireland is just not into Scotland in that way.

I am not…really sure what the question means by ‘how did they make their choice’ mostly because it was more of a natural conclusion to them. Something that just happened naturally over time, through periods of ups and downs, finally settling into something comfortable. A good friendship, one that got them through periods of time, and perhaps the one that makes them feel the most close to human.

Is your character tall? Short? What about size? Weight? Posture? How do they feel about their physical body?

This is going to make the England-Stan Anon (pspspsps) very annoyed, but England is fat, always was to varying degrees. He did have an awkward growth spurt from chubby little rosy-cheeked infant to some sort of lanky teenager, but filled out quickly; Lanky teenagers have no place on a battlefield and England had to get used to wearing suits of armour…especially given his weapon of a choice was a fucking war-hammer, is anyone surprised to find him quite thick-set? As he grew up, he rounded out - and these days, England is more a little soft than solid due to a lifetime now mostly sedentary - and in his opinion, much more happy. Gone are aching muscles and hunger pangs, gone was the constant need to be on-guard, and now he can just enjoy the sweet treats he desires.

(Sweets back then were far, far less affordable.)

England is about 5’’9, just shy of beating Wales’ height; And yet, he still seems to tower over others, in part due to how he carries himself - constantly a brooding expression on his face, thick (one scarred and the other a prosthetic) arms crossed over his chest, big round belly only making him seem that much more formidable. Yet, one can recognise that England feels more at ease - He doesn’t walk so fast anymore, far less in a hurry, and he seems to genuinely for the first time take care of his appearance; England’s hair was a bird’s nest of greasy hair, England going in spirals and just simply hacking it off, too frustrated to do anything with it and just…generally feeling terrible about how he looked. He rarely thought about what he wore, mostly utilizing whatever fit the standards of the time - and now those expectations, those weighty standards are gone and England is much more satisfied now.

For a start, he’s not hiding his scars so much - he used to be ashamed of his missing arm, but these days, England recognises it as another part of himself; He’s more accepting of his disability and much more attentive about how he dresses and whether or not it makes him happy. Good lord, England absolutely went mad for the punk scene when it swept through England, I’ll tell you that much. He still has the studded leather jacket in his closet and wears it on occasion - and his hair is longer now, more brushed and genuinely healthier.

So in short, England’s in a much better place about his physical body.

#hws england #hws scotland #hws wales #hws france #hws ireland #hws northern ireland #aph england #aph scotland #aph wales #aph france #aph ireland #aph northern ireland

[modernwizard]

Why I love the Spymaster #90: He's an ace at being a Russian love machine!

Find my full series under the HELP I WUVS HIM tag.

#90: He's an ace at being a Russian love machine!

I've already brought up the Spymaster's performance as Rasputin, including a dance to Boney M's Rasputin, in several of my reasons, including #55: He's a mess as the Doctor! [discussing symbolism of Rasputin costume], #65: Ra-Ra-Rasputin! [discussing why he disguises himself as Rasputin], and #69: OMINOUS yet dweeby dancing [discussing his dance moves].

I have not, however, examined an interesting juxtaposition of the historical Rasputin and the Rasputin in the song with the Spymaster's Rasputin. Real-life Rasputin and Rasputin in the Boney M song have reputations as seductive sexual dynamos. The Spymaster's Rasputin, quite simply, doesn't.

Historical Grigori Rasputin [shown in photo below hanging out with Tsarina Alexandra and her kids] caused an uproar in the Russian royal court for several reasons. First, he was a person with little formal education who hailed from rural Siberia who, despite these origins, ingratiated himself with the elite of St. Petersburg. Second, he was a Christian mystic who impressed religious leaders and claimed miraculous healing abilities. Third, he banged a lot of high-class Russian women. Rumors circulated that he and Tsarina Alexandra had sex and that he seduced her daughters, though who knows if this was true? Anyway, he was sleeping around a lot and, despite his status as confidant and advisor to the royal family, also pissing lots of people off.

The version of Rasputin in the Boney M song draws on historical fact. The lyrics acknowledge him that the tsarina "believed he was a holy healer who would heal her son" and allude to his influence in matters of state: "In all affairs of state, he was the man to please."

Boney M's song, however, lavishes most of its description on Rasputin's alleged sexual prowess. Besides his other gifts, "he was also the kind of man that women would desire," the song reports. "Though he was a brute," the song says a little later, "they just fell into his arms." Even though the chorus claims that "it was a shame how he carried on," it also celebrates Rasputin as "Russia's greatest love machine." According to the lyrics, Rasputin embodied sexual power, skill, and magnetism, and his uncontrollable lust contributed to his demise.

And then there's the Spymaster's Rasputin. Early on in The Power of the Doctor, he goes by "Father Grigori" and says that "these special times...must strengthen our faith," so he's clearly playing into Rasputin's religious reputation. He comments about Prince Alexei's illness and gives Tsar Nicholas some political advice about an ongoing war, so he's also using Rasputin's renown as a healer and a political advisor. Given that Rasputin is supposed to be a sexually attractive and irresistible person, it's notable that the Spymaster's Rasputin evinces none of this in his interactions with the tsar and the tsarina, one of Rasputin's alleged sex partners. By compelling the tsar to say, "You are the Master, and I will obey you," the Spymaster shows that he's less interested in banging the tsarina than he is controlling both tsar and tsarina with his magical mesmerism of mental muddling.

The Spymaster's interpretation of Rasputin rather lacks the irresistible sex appeal that the Rasputin of history and song supposedly had. Even when the Spymaster is bumping and grinding to Rasputin in front of Thirteen, the movements may allude to sex, but they don't seem particularly sexy or sexual to me. I point out in #64: He gets off on performing villainy! that the Spymaster gets really excited by dominating people and in #69: OMINOUS yet dweeby dancing that this dance is essentially a wordless, full-body gloat. The constant and almost hostile eye contact between the Spymaster and Thirteen reinforces that this is his attempt to stare her down [see pic below]. Regardless of whether viewers think that the actor and/or the character is sexy, the Spymaster seems not to be performing irresistible sensuality here as much as highly focused intimidation.

The Spymaster's sexuality and/or desires and/or erotic activities are interesting. I think that all Masters are kinky as hell, including the Spymaster [#60]. In particular, the Spymaster's kinks include being choked [#43: His provoking Ashad!], robots [#45: He's robosexual!], and domination/playing the villain [#64: He gets off on performing villainy!].

He reads to me as some kind of ace who thinks that erotic activities can be enjoyable, especially his preferred kinks, and who can perform sexualized interaction if he wants to [ref. flirtation with Yaz in Spyfall II], but who ultimately desires power and control more than he desires certain activities or certain people. Even though he dances to lyrics about Rasputin being "Russia's greatest love machine," the Spymaster uses the Rasputin role to control minds [in the case of the tsar and tsarina] and emphasize his victim's powerlessness [in the case of the Doctor]. Thus he downplays Rasputin's reputed lusts, underlining instead Rasputin's mesmerizing hold over people's minds. The Spymaster's omission of Rasputin's being "the kind of man that women would desire" indirectly suggests that the Spymaster does not experience or perceive sexual desire in a usual way. Way to ace the love machine role, Spymaster! 😉

@natalunasans @timeladyjamie @rowanthestrange @whovianuncle

#rasputin #grigori rasputin #spymaster #the spymaster #sacha dhawan #HELP I WUVS HIM #ra-ra-rasputin #boney m #russia's greatest love machine? #he's acing it #an ace love machine #bad puns ahoy!!

[seeminglyseph]

I feel like I don’t know what to do with the part of my brain prone to wild speculation and deep interpretation for a live-play improv game that yes, is thoroughly planned to be interpreted and speculated upon.... but like Cinderella’s armour sometimes you’re running a show and the best way to end a scene is to make a joke about how there’s a handy spell for cleaning up if you piss yourself in your armour. Sometimes it’s what feels right because LARP and TTRPG and improv acting is so much submerging into a character that sometimes *you* don’t understand the full motivation until you go home that night and break down all the pieces. Because sometimes you train yourself to act off basic things and you don’t realize until you’re in it. Like Emily said she didn’t realize being a tank was about redirecting and soaking damage more than dealing it and it changed how she looked at her character, her arc and her interaction with her deity, but it didn’t make her necessarily wrong. it was just like... you don’t know until you start working with a character or a game or a world exactly how it’s going to go. No plan survives first contact with the enemy.

So sometimes I do feel like... “I have wild speculation about the nature of the wolf as a trickster” and then Brennan I think does not consider the Wolf or Death to be a Trickster. and I have to deal with my interpretation of the topic at hand being different from that of the author, because I still see him as having put those themes in the story whether he himself considers the Wolf as Death to be among the Trickster animals like Fox and Hare. Or if my being raised more Germanic and his being raised more Celtic effects our approaches to storytelling and interpretation? my patchwork and lacking of formal education? Is this the true purpose of death of the author? Is it 5am and I am very stoned?

I’m still making a twice upon a time OC for my own imaginary daydreaming because it hurts a total of nobody to make up my own version of Hansel who is some tragic young adult now. idk. isn’t it the nature of watching people solve puzzles to wonder how you might’ve tried solving them yourself?

#seph watches d20 neverafter #d20 spoilers

[thesocialjusticewitch]

Izzy Hands was Almost Certainly in the British Navy

We learn a lot about Edward through his interactions with Stede, and through Edward, Izzy's dialogue, and a bit of historical knowledge, we can infer a great deal about Mr. Hands. Edward cannot read or write. We know this because when he signed himself into the king's custody, he signed his name with a simple "X". Because of this lack of education, he is unfamiliar with some concepts such as "retirement" and is fascinated by those who come from a place of learning/privilege. This is unsurprising, given his poor upbringing. What is surprising is that when he asked Izzy if he knew about retirement, Izzy was familiar with it and had already discarded it as something not pertinent to his life. This suggests that Izzy has some degree of education and was around people for whom retirement was an option. Edward leaves most attacks these days to Izzy and acknowledges that he doesn't even have to be on the ship. Izzy is certainly skilled with a sword, enough so that Ed is reasonably certain he will kill Stede with ease, and enough so that he can feel safe showing off his prowess against a person of higher rank. This is another factor suggesting that Izzy received some formal education. Izzy has enough contacts to know how to ransom an officer back to the British. Geraldo mentions that Izzy hasn't been in Spanish Jackie's for quite some time, suggesting Izzy does not need to make use of average fences in order to sell captured officers. And speaking of Spanish Jackie's... Izzy says that the reason he hasn't been in Spanish Jackie's for awhile is because he "fookin' hates" it there. Some time later, when the British navy shows up and Jackie says she doesn't like their kind in her establishment, he assures her that if it makes her feel any better they hate being there, too. He delivers the line with such calm surety that we can suspect that his own hatred of her place (odd, considering how macho and pirate-y it is, it would seem like just his sort of place) maybe stems from his time with them further back. Edward usually has hostages that aren't valuable disposed of. His interaction with Izzy suggests the standard practice is that captured ship crew members that are not valuable are forced to repair damages before they are executed. But if Izzy was part of the British navy, how did he come to work for Edward? We know that Edward is fascinated by those with an education who come from more privileged lives than he had growing up. I suspect that Izzy was a petty officer on board a British naval ship. He was likely educated to some degree as a member of the military, and rose only because he was dedicated, hard-working, and became skillful at swordplay and working onboard a ship. Still, most higher-ranking positions were purchased in the British military, and Izzy almost certainly did not come from a wealthy family. Rather, he probably became disgusted that rich fops bought their way to the top and held authority over him, despite his skills and hard work. If Edward succeeded in capturing a British ship (perhaps this is how he gained his ship?), he would have tried to ransom the officers. It may have been that the higher officers had their ransoms paid, but that the military was content to abandon Izzy and the other crew members as inconsequential. We know that, historically, captured crew members were sometimes pressed into service by the pirates who caught them. This was certainly preferable to being killed. It is very likely that Edward was impressed by what he saw in Izzy and offered him a position on his ship. Izzy would have found his potential to rise within Ed's crew much greater than within the military, and he would have been grateful to Ed for sparing him. Izzy thus traded in a life that would have turned out unremarkable and very likely cut short in a war, to one in which he gained prominence as Blackbeard's first mate. This also goes a long way towards explaining Izzy's intense animosity for Stede early on, if he sees Stede as another rich dandy playing with ships.

#izzy hands #ofmd #izzy our flag means death #stede #izzy x blackbeard

[hiraya-rawr]

So I ask mom and mama (Grandma) who are they going to vote and they Marcos.

What are you thoughts on that I don't know anything about him so.. 🤔

03 tw: PH Politics

There's a reason why the vast majority of students and universities are against BB M4rcos :')) In fact, there's really a lot so I'll try to sum it up.

Aside from the post below, I highly encourage you to do research at reliable sources! (Like reports from the united nations, international news stations, etc.) Avoid opinion articles without references!

I know politics is really stressful and heavy, but let's carefully (and slowly) expose ourselves for the sake of awareness and our future!

(last part has my personal note to you!)

(From my logical side) His platform and political activity is underwhelming. He lacks a stand for environment, women, and territorial disputes. He also doesn't have a built campaign for education and agriculture (remember, our farmers and fishermen are vital for stable communities!).

(From my petty side as a human rights advocate) Imagine being the son of a dictator, with hundreds of survivors sharing their experiences and stories. More than 11,000 victims, 2,000 murders and missing people. Most of which were students and lawyers. Your own mother CONFIRMED the use of torture and military force, the international court also confirmed it, the United Nations Human Rights Council (UNHRC) also confirmed it — yet as you stand on stage to spread your campaign, you denied ever single one of their experience.

My own uncle was imprisoned as a student actually. They called him a terrorist and his acquaintances were beaten.

Whereas, the richer side of my family profited (shamefully). We were part of the "rich growing richer" and "the poor growing poorer". This is also why a part of my family supports him. It's called crony capitalism (his father's rule is a textbook example of it too!)

Things his diehard supporters need to know:

1. Why are you so adamant to defend someone who won't even show up on debates for you? All of the other candidates show up to defend and present themselves, spread their agenda, interact, etc.

2. Compared to his infamous dictator father, isn't he underwhelming? His ambition, as stated in a live interview, was that he went into politics for money. Isn't that clear enough?

3. He doesn't have a degree. He lied about his Oxford diploma to the point that Oxford released a formal statement denying him. Don't you dare tell me a "degree isn't everything" when so many people work hard to get a great education in this country. He is a candidate for presidency, why not have one with a degree.

4. Martial law was never the golden age. Check every international textbook, every peso-to-dollar exchange rate, we were dropping rapidly.

5. "A lot of infrastructure were built during his father's time!" Those were debt-driven reforms, meaning buildings were built through debts left unpaid. We still continue to pay them UNTIL NOW. There are court hearings demanding the money back but, well, justice systems are unfair.

6. The "achievements" of the father are not the achievements of the son. He needs to build himself, not use his last name.

7. Again with him supporting people that have a negative presence for women's rights, environment, and LGBTQ.

8. The world is watching. I have friends abroad asking "is your country really voting for a dictator's son?" and it's humiliating that theyre more aware than us :(

There's so much more I have to say and clarify but please do take the time to research. Especially if you're entering the voting age! I started delving into politics at grade 9 and I understand how heavy it can be, especially when we're dealing with stubborn family members, but for the sake of educating the people around us, let's do our best!

note: I don't want to be THAT person encouraging family fights, but please do try convincing your family :')) there's only a few days left and it's crazy how people choose so carelessly. Let them consider other candidates, like Leni or Ka Leody, Kiko, or senators in the pink party list.

I'm lucky that most of my family is Leni-Kiko, but I can no longer deal with the ignorance of my BBM family side, especially if it negatively impacts the future of others :( they don't even have actual reasons, they don't know a thing about his campaign etc, they love him for his father and it really gives me cult-mindset vibes. It's very closed minded and harmful for us, especially for the less privileged 😖

Politics stresses me and I wish I never have to campaign for something as basic as compassion hcjshdjdjhed

#hira politics #tw: politics #hira coleluuviida #leni kiko 2022 #bongbong marcos #lenikiko2022 #politics #ipanalona10to #kulayrosasangbukas

[lured-into-wonderland]

(( Enemies to lovers is sometimes a juicy trope. If I remember correctly, Nunnally has a problem with Yuma... So, turning that into a ship is an intriguing thought.

“…”

“…”

“No, absolutely not! I would not even consider staying in the same room with that brute! Not to mention anything else. How insulting!”

A few more words from Lizzy:

No, I do not think Yuma and Nunnally would ever work together. I honestly think it would already be a success if they ever had a proper (and friendly conversation). But to dwell on it more. Nunnally hating Yuma was not actually designed. I originally planned she knew nobody from the Mukami household. It was a result of one of Nunnally’s interactions. But then when I started to think about it a bit deeper, this coincidence made perfect sense. Yuma would definitely the one that Nunnally would have most difficulties to accept to be equal with. Firstly, she was brought up a princess (and she considers herself one) and Yuma is on the other end of the society. Nunnally would despise his lack of manners, lack of formal education, the way he’s speaking and dressing up, and even his hobbies... Well, gardening is something that the servants do, right? In addition, giving his backstory (and friendship with Shuu), Nunnally would definitely blame him for destroying “her family” (meaning Shuu and Reiji) and causing pain to Lady Beatrix. No, I do not see they could even become friends.

I do not know Yuma well, as a character, but I’d imagine he would also see her as an entitled and rude person that considers herself better only because of her surname… So, that’s a very bad start. However, if there was actual Yuma to interact with, they might end up as friends, but I cannot imagine them as a ship.

#ask game #yuriko tsukino rp #Nunnally #Nunnally Sakamaki #Yuma Mukami

[qui-qui-quee]

Thoughts Are Fleeting (Post-Duty Stream of Consciousness)

There’s a good reason I’ve barely been writing, barely been journaling lately. Because I’ve seen a consistent pattern of feeling one thing, thinking one thing and then the next day, my outlook changes and the cycle repeats itself.

“You lack conviction” One might say. Maybe it’s true. Maybe it’s not. It really depends on the topic. There are a few things that I remain steadfast in, including my faith in Christ, my love of art (regardless how intense or faint it gets), and whatnot. But meanwhile, I sit here writing all this in my condo unit, trying to mentally assess all the events I went through for the past two months while I was in face-to-face hospital duty.

For those who don’t know (since I rarely post here anyway), I was working in the wards of our teaching hospital as the final hurdle of our medical education. Needless to say, it was the busiest I’d ever been in...well ages. Twelve and 24-hour duties, constant monitoring of patients, participating in surgical operations and bonding or clashing with my groupmates (I didn’t have much of the latter though, thank God), it was a lot to take in and so my thoughts and my feelings were mostly put in the back burner (minus the times I went through emotional breakdowns from exhaustion and stress). As always, I was questioning my choices, doubting myself, you know the usual from your neurodivergent, possibly mentally-ill individual. All the masking, creating social energy just to talk to peers and superiors. all the works.

I’m not even sure what else there is to say as I write all this. My stream of consciousness is once again beginning to wane but perhaps that’s because I choose not to share the deeper thoughts that’s been echoing in my head for...quite some time now, and has probably contributed to my lack of initiative when it comes to human relationships and interactions and social behavior. Anyway I won’t go any further than that, seeing how this is a public space and though I intend to be talking to a void, I know I still have a bit of an audience here.

Anyway.

Medicine is hard guys. And yet it was during this time that I appreciated being and working with people again. You all have no idea how much I missed spending time with folks other than my family members and now that we’re back to online (heck we’re not even doing anything as we speak), I’m feeling some slight pseudo separation anxiety because of how abrupt our clerkship duties ended. I got to know my groupmates more, saw both their flaws and strengths (and they saw mine). It’s just...boy this COVID business has made so many things difficult. I still feel like a fish out of water, a baby giraffe just starting out on its legs. Two months simply isn’t enough and I don’t even know if I’ve completely settled on becoming a doctor past boards.

And what about now? What am I to do now? I have comprehensive exams that everyone else but me is getting anxious about. I’m doing what I can to study but it I’ve learned that there are many things that are simply out of my control and sadly it might be contributing to a sense of learned helplessness I’d developed from the past (yes I think I need a therapist and have yet to find one). 

And loss. Loss is something I’m so used to I think I’ve become numb to it. It all started with high school, even middle school when close friends would leave the country, then my entire HS barkada left after graduation leaving me behind, then there’s losing my cousin to some unknown illness, so...it really became easy for me to let go of relationships if it seemed like the other wasn’t meeting me halfway.

Why am I being this honest here? I dunno. Maybe because no one else feels right to talk to and even if I did have a therapist, it feels too formal of a setting. I know God can read exactly what I’m saying. After all, doesn’t He know what I need before I even get to say or figure it out?

Anyway my stream of consciousness is starting to feel forced so I’m gonna end my thoughts here. Keep me in your prayers, folks. Thank you.

#qooky rambles #qooky's med life #DO NOT REBLOG #q life #q text #sorry this is a lot more depressing than my past posts