#and I will still leave them a gift

[spookebich]

there is a holiday party tomorrow and I should go. I should… but I could just sneak upstairs and hyperventilate in the stick insect room???

#the holidays may be a nice time for some people but they get worse for me every fuckinh year #relatives I barely see making unsolicited comments on my appearance #not enough money to get gifts for people #the unending lonely void I live in that may be broken for a few moments before being ripped open anew #I am making bread and treats to pass along to people who can’t stand to look at me and blocked me on everything #and I will still leave them a gift #hear second hand that this bread is amazing #I will wake up on December 26th and still live alone and see no one for another week. #I just hate hate hate this

[werecreature-addicted]

for someone who wants to bang a werewolf, I sure do scream like a fire alarm when my dog brings me "gifts" (dead lizard) realistically if a man brought me his hunt as a gift I'd pass out.

#she brought me an ALIVE turtle once and I still don't know how to unpack that like emotionally #where the fuck did you get that #my little hunter #i'm so proud of her but also please stop bringing me birds and mice and lizards #she leaves them right outside my bedroom which is very sweet but also means I almost step on them every time #screaming crying throwing up trying to clean up her gifts

[sysig]

Chewtoy (Patreon)

#Doodles #Handplates #UT #Fellplates #Gaster #Papyrus #Sans #Squeeze him - he makes a squeaky toy noise #Everyone needs to bite Gaster! He doesn't yield like flesh so it probably doesn't even hurt right? Yeahhhh he'll be fiiiine #There is something very funny to me about him just sitting there and taking it tho lol - feeds into his martyr play ♪ #As if I don't already have a favourite martyr hmmm don't worry about it lol #What was he even doing why is he just letting 2-P bite him lol #Socialization? That's not a good thing to just let him do! He's still got a young mind! Boundaries are important #He does offer a way out - hehe ♫ - but he doesn't enforce it! You're setting them up for failure #Hehehehe #The bone gift was fun to doodle hehe ♪ He leaves it with him and it goes completely untouched while his arm is covered in teeth-marks pfft #Even with Papyrus a bit more unruly I still like to imagine he acts mean in largely harmless ways haha #Like yeah he's being naughty and biting when he knows better and offered other options - Gaster. Gentle enforcement - but he's not Hurting #He's not using his entire bite force - probably lol or he's just got weak little baby bites (though those can be quite painful!) #Sans on the other hand would absolutely go 100% full power - and still only do 1HP lol what an unfortunate design quirk for him #If only he had a jaw he could open! He'd bite the heck outta Gaster! Alas #I do like to imagine Fellplates!Sans has just fast-tracked to classic's conclusion of ''You suck and I hate you. Die'' about Gaster lol #Even the possibility of not being mean to him is so alien! What do you /mean/ not hurt you?? Do you know who you're talking to?? #He'll find another way to mess with him in good time haha

[bloodbathfortwo]

What does everyone think of Nigel Forbes-Colbie ever getting pregnant? It doesn't matter how you interpret it: Omegaverse, males can get pregnant Au, Trans! Nigel. Just tell me your guys' headcanons of Nigel's pregnancy: The changes, the hardships, the softness, and the vulnerabilities.

#murderous intent #like minds 2006 #like minds #alex forbes #nigel colbie #Alex Forbes X Nigel Colbie #Nigel Colbie x Alex Forbes #If you guys haven't noticed my recent posts I've been feeling way too soft for this fandom #Like #Too soft #And it's both Nigel and Alex's fault for making me too soft when all I want is to cause chaos and do crimes #To be honest I'd like to Imagine Nigel's pregnancy as an arduous one: Swollen feet . Sore back. Weird cravings. Mood swings. Everything. #And he isn't used to seeing himself get swollen with life each and every day. While Alex is so gullible first thing in the morning because #of the baby bump growing every single day. And Nigel getting rounder every week. #Sure. Nigel is enjoying being pampered by Alex with all these services and gifts but sometimes he thinks that he isn't that attractive #Anymore for Alex. And that while he's carrying his children he will leave him like a used toy. #He'd have instances where he'd feel conflicting feelings for their child and think of possibilities of removing her from his body #But he'd soon regret it. He just breaks down into tiny little pieces of ever thinking of their daughter that way. His and ALEX"S #He can never stomach killing her. He can never stomach ruining her beautiful life that he has yet witnessed. #He still has his self-harm tendencies but he avoids it. He avoids harming his angel. His miracle. His life. #He wants to be a good father to his child. He wants to nurture her. Feed her knowledge and love. Cater to her needs and be at her beck #and call: be a father. #Alex knows what's happening to Nigel. They talk. And they talk everyday. He knows how much it can be hard for Nigel during his pregnancy #And he will always be there to protect his spouse and his unborn child. #He will spite their original purpose in order to create their own purpose. Which Nigel had a hard time letting go of. #It was hard. Seeing the history that made them into the people they are today. But it had to #they had to change #change for their family. #For their miracle. #And Nigel seeing Alex being this doting makes him fall for him ten times more

[hgrve]

harringrove angst (kind of mean steve for those who aren't into that)

thinking of steve and billy having bad fights after starting a relationship, and during those fights steve always brings up the night at the byers.

steve doesn’t really know why he does it, him and billy have made amends, they’re together now and they love each other. except, he kind of does know why he brings it up. it wins him the argument. billy goes quiet and hurt and they don’t fight anymore.

because billy doesn’t want to be like neil, wants to show steve (show everyone) that he’s better. he knows he fucked up, that he’s not perfect and probably never will be, but he thought steve had forgiven him. that they’d forgiven each other, because steve apologized to him too. and how can billy bring that up without looking like he’s making excuses? can’t say you hit me too or you know what happened before with my dad or what was i supposed to think about what i found?

eventually steve does it so much that they stop fighting completely. and, yeah, steve no longer has to deal with the arguments, he and billy don’t scream at each other until they’re both in tears anymore. it’s the best they’ve gotten along since they got together or, well, ever.

but he’s also lost the shy smiles billy gives him when it’s just the two of them, and the little laugh that billy is embarrassed of, the one that hiccups out of him and scrunches up his nose. and, most importantly, he’s lost the quiet nights where billy opens up to him, about the abuse from his dad, and how he felt when his mom left, how much he misses her and how he wishes she’d loved him enough to take him with her.

maybe steve starts getting angrier, and more hurt as time goes on and billy doesn’t open back up. he decides that if billy is going to withhold things from him, steve should start being able to take things from billy too. they still have sex, billy still sighs into steve’s neck when steve slides into him but steve starts not kissing billy, turning his head away when billy tries, turning billy on his belly when billy gets too persistent. leaves billy to clean up by himself as soon as they’re done rather than stay in bed holding each other, enjoying the afterglow together like they’ve always done before. stops taking billy out with him when he hangs out with the party or the other teens, stops telling billy when he goes out at all.

and so, the resentment starts to build up, for both of them, and they’re right back where they started, fighting and screaming at each other. but neither of them will leave. they love each other, after all. steve refuses to have another failed relationship, because what does that say about steve? that he isn’t good enough, loveable enough, worthy enough, just not ever enough. and as much as billy doesn’t want to be like neil, he also doesn’t really want to be like his mom either. doesn’t want to abandon steve like his mom abandoned him, knows how it affected him, how it made him feel, and he won’t do that to someone he cares about.

so they stay stuck in this endless cycle because maybe steve loves billy and billy loves steve, but they don’t always like each other, and they definitely don’t trust each other.

#*w #harringrove #billy hargrove #steve h #i'm not great at writing so grammar/syntax are probably all over the place here so apologies for that #but i had this thought and it wouldn't leave #bc as much as i love happy healthy harringrove i also love angst and can see them bringing out the worst in each other #i also have so much more i wanted to add to this but it would have made it start to go all over the place so i will be adding here #but in short i think billy gets nasty when they fight but steve gets nasty and /personal/ #steve would regret it as soon as he does it and i feel like he would be the type to love bomb (not necessarily meaning it to be malicious) #but bc he's following the example of his parents (my hc) & also a lot of his self worth is tied into what he can give to/do for his partner #whether that is gifting material objects or an over abundance of attention #and i think most of billy's self worth is tied to his appearance/body and he thinks the way to show he cares is through sex #so even though he doesn't feel like he can share more personal stuff with steve anymore #(or maybe he views steve bringing up the fight as steve saying he views billy bringing up his past as making excuses) #he still feels like he can show steve he loves him by sleeping together #and i hc that sex with steve was a whole nother ball game for billy #that he never kissed with anyone as much as he does with steve or that anyone ever showed as much /care/ as steve does for him during sex #so when steve starts not kissing him or treating him like he did previously it sends billy into a tail spin #and i love emotional billy and emotional billy is canon #but i also feel that billy is so use to hiding his emotions (even if he doesn't succeed at it) bc of what neil would do to him #and he would try to do so doubly for someone he cares for bc he views himself and his emotions as something shameful and volatile and bad #and so those emotions would build and build until he just couldn't keep them in anymore #which of course just starts another fight and so on #they are both deeply insecure individuals your honor #whoops these tags got long sorry

[arklay]

RESIDENT EVIL → DR. DIANA WESKER

"This is how a girl becomes holy: first she becomes empty." — Brynne Rebele-Henry, Prelude

[templates × & × — insp — playlist]

#mine. #oc: diana #tw: snakes #hi hii hello i'm alive and i bring gifts!! click for better quality as always ♡ #so. it's still jan 15 (my hc birthday for wesker based on natal chart i did for him) somewhere in the world so diana gets an edit instead of #him. peace and love on planet earth lmao he gets a lil square but she's my beloved my gal... i was wondering if i should just leave this for #next month as you can see by that date on there for her lil creation anniversary but hehe anyhow i saw emily do this a bit ago with meshing #these two templates together and went omg i wanna do that i wanna but then i took this break and had some more shit happen so hiii #also i'm very behind on notifs i promise i'll get to them i've just been aughgh and haven't even scrolled or anything like i just queued #posts in my tracked tag this morning and oh man i didn't realise i was gone for so long huh... but anyways rambling as always but miss diana #my beloved the loml!!! sorry i use those two pictures for her all the time but also it's really hard to find hd ones of her fc in like the #era i see for her and the hair i like... like a lot of her pictures she has straight and like shoulder length hair and i'm like mmm that's #not it... but whatever. also cause i can't be bothered looking for nice pretty quotes and there's already one in there have that post #which multiple people sent to me a bit ago akdsjkjd oopsies

[burinazar]

It's a bit funny that to parts of my circles I'm 'the fandom one'/'the fanfic one'/'the shipping one' as the person they know most prominently into such things

because as much as i love writing my fics and shipping my ships my interest in both of those things is, I think, very narrow and specific compared to most people who are into them? due to my habits being like. very particular

#i think some ppl think of me as ahh my buddy who is always reading fanfic and i'm like. look. i would LIKE to be that. but i'm not #it's comically difficult to get me to sit down and read a new fanfic. for no discernable reason #the fandoms i like to read for don't even have big fic scenes but i've still checked out such a narrow portion of them #(and these fandoms are like. just a few. leaving aside MiA's dead tag. LOGH + T&B + Vorkosigan + ...anything else here would be a lie) #(Queen's Thief + Temeraire + TMA are on the backburner rn for reading fic but they were faves before yet i read SO little of what existed) #(everything else i just check out very occasionally or when directly recc'd) #i think mmmaaaybe 'my buddy who reads tons of fic' would be the case if there were new fics about the sages coming out every day #they're sort of a unique hyperfixation for me lol #but there are NOT. instead there are ((checks)) #four (4) english language belavue fics on AO3 that are not by me #AND two of them i would say do not actually have any ship content and were likely just tagged that to be safe #as far as non ship content there are ((checks again)) 21 English language fics tagged with Belaf and I wrote 13 of them ........ #(and 17 for Vueko and i wrote 10. two of the others barely mention her and shouldn’t be tagged lol) …guys i'm starving............ #ok you read to the bottom of the tags you get to hear a selfish wish #i kind of hope that someday...someone will...write some fic about the sages either because of me or for me #gen or ship it doesnt matter #but this kind of thing usually happens in AO3 exchanges though and there aren't ones in this fandom because the fic scene is so miniscule #i'm literally running one right now off AO3 but have a feeling it will end up being mostly art and also didn't put myself in as a requester #since the people participating have largely made stuff for me as gifts before and i have a glut of lovely work from them #and again that exchange will mostly end up being art i feel and not fic. but some other time... i still wish ... more fic... pleae..plaeabs #there are very specific reasons i don't want to host an MiA fic exchange through AO3. i can guess the kind of stuff some people will reques #(the kind of stuff that's already in the tag.) and it's not stuff i feel like moderating an exchange involving >_> so i won't #but god.. ... ..... someday......i hope....there can be an exchange where i ask for somethinga bout these people.............

[dutybcrne]

Thinkings thinkings of Fatui!Kaeya have been reawakened in reviewing Arle's teasers/animations

#☆ ┆ ( .ooc. ); #//Whether it's Dad!Pierro or not; I do love the idea of him being left in the care of the Fatui/House of Hearth #//Tho timelines considered; he prolly would be in Pierro's personal care while Arle goes through her Traumatic Matricide Experience #//Doubt the man would want to leave him out of his sight; Khaenri'ahn/Alberich ties considered #//Or maybe he was raised/trained to fight under Signora. Or even for Columbina (her namesake's ties to Pierro's; considered) #//Tho also do LOVE the idea of Kae and Taru growin up together in the Fatui ranks and being the disastrous + shy boi duo #//Tho Kae'd prolly have less to hide/fear with them when it comes to his heritage. The strictness he'd be raised with though... #//Eh; Taru could bring him out of his shell even still jdbgfkf. If anyone can; he deffo could. His little wintry sunshine #//So maybe he'd grow into his peacock self a little more naturally; even if perhaps still out of necessity/for ease of his missions #//Less of a facade to hide his grief/missing pieces tho; more like the way Taru is charming & goofy to lower people's guards #//Still has his little habit of testing people deffo is Much worse and much more sadistic when it comes down to it #//Particularly towards fellow Fatui who disrespect him or their comrades; or just someone he ends up disliking in general #//Does 'test' new comrades; but is more willing to step in & help them if need be. Wants UTMOST trust; determination & loyalty in his men #//So will only ever take those who push to complete the mission at all costs; even themselves/willingly ask him for help when they need it #//Dislikes those who run; & LOATHES cowards who abandon comrades to save themselves; he WILL deliberately make sure they don't make it back #//Still employs his intel gathering methods as normal verse; but has preying mantis tendencies when it comes down to it nbcfjgf #//ESP if they try to take advantage of/blackmail him in some way. Or worse; those who betray him. He is meticulous & VERY ruthless abt it #//His signature is decapitation & an unmelting (Abyssal energy-laced) ice shard through the heart; around which he'd carve a stylized one #//If those informants keep being useful to him; they are safe; and treated so lovingly by him; spoiled rotten with gifts & favors aplenty #//Once they lose their usefulness...well; regrettably he cannot leave any loose ends. These become frozen as statues for him to keep #//'Precious mementos of lovers & conspirators'; he'd call them. He'd keep them in his private home in Snezhnaya #v; glacialis pavonis (fatui!kaeya) #//If he had to have a Harbinger title/name (maybe bumped up for when Scara erases himself); he'd prolly be l'Innamorato #//Fitting of his methods (is also the remaining role of Commedia dell'arte lololol). He is saccharine sweet; pretty & deadly as a belladonn #//Deffo would have tango-based motifs rather than waltz; would favor frost-laced roses. Might even leave those with his victims too #//Can you tell I listened to Rondo Across Countless Kalpas as I wrote this up jhbfjgkfhf #hc; kaeya #//I mean yeah lol. I have so many more thinkings abt this verse aaAAAA #//Am torn if I want his to use a Cryo Delusion; or have him with Cryo Vision and an Anemo Delusion. Do like that for Cryo Swirls #//Then his rage/scorn could be likened to a Blizzard. Do like that image. Deffo favors his Abyssal powers more tho; maybe THAT'd be better

[secret-keeper-speaks]

hello again. apologies, i haven't been very active. here's some christmas news for you all because it's in two days: i've been keeping myself quite busy. my mother bought the wrong cake mix for her rum cake, so my father and i had to go get some for her. he's lucky i have a good memory, otherwise he would have made the same mistake she did, mixing up golden cake with vanilla cake. after finishing that, we did a typical christmas tradition. well, another one, technically, since the cake was ALSO a christmas tradition... THE POINT IS, we made gingerbread. we have to let the dough chill overnight, however, so don't expect to see many pictures of them, because they havent quite been made yet.

#sk logs #speaking of christmas #i still havent gotten presents for others #i've already gotten erica a grappling hook #she's been wanting it all year #and i got gooch a new computer #since he accidentally broke his old one a couple months ago #i've been thinking on what to give captain #he sure seemed to like my concept for a nannycam disguised as a plush toy #maybe he likes plushies? #maybe i could find one at the mall tomorrow when i go with erica #i'm kinda afraid to go on my own #its very big #and slightly intimidating #especially with all the teenagers around #i've also been thinking on if i should get george and harold anything #they're quite a couple of nuisances to me #but it wouldnt be courteous to leave them without a gift would it? #i gotta think on that decision a little more in the morning too

[bigothteddies]

maybe a house would be nice. admittedly I am only saying that because I realized I could have a housewarming party and try to invite my favorite people to come visit

#unimportant thoughts #itd be so fun! just imagining sharing my space with the people i love and having them in my space to celebrate it #its all I could want ! im gonna be daydreaming about it sctually #i mean i still could do that with an apartment BUT less space also noise restrictions #UGH i could throw a yearly christmas party! #my family had a big christmas party every year when i was a kid with some families we were close with :( #i miss it a LOT #nostalgic about the fact that there were kids my age i could play toys with and eat at the kids table sure but STILL #i could do that for my friends ! #i could maybe cover a plane ticket or two and get some of my favorite people together for a nice dinner and sleepover ;( #i could decorate and cook a meal and have wrapped gifts for everyone under the tree :( #meatz has a friend that throws a big halloween party every year and i really admire it #to throw and host a party rvery year where the prople you love can gather and see each other snd have a good time #is a PRICELESS fucking thing to provide and its something i admire #DOING things and hosting events and making stuff happen is a Big Deal #its a value and service many people dont appreciate #fortunately its been BEAT into me by the BMX scene #that the most importsnt thing you can do for BMX isnt to post your opinions online #but to host your own event to provide for the sport your own way to get people involved and to have a good time #and i wsnt to do that in life ! #its hard ive arranged beach trips where no one shows up ive hosted movie nights where people leave halfway through #but I know ill find people that want to do things and hang out just as badly as I do !

[diodellet]

So many good options for the art appreciation asks but let's go with 3, 4, 13, 14 and 27.

hi hi ner! thanks forda qs!! these are all prettie incharestinge!! (<-girlie who didn't know she'd be Yapping-Yapping)

3. and 4.) Go to [fandom] tag and reblog some art you like that has under 100 notes ++ Go to the art tag (or similar) and reblog some art you like that has under 100 notes

noted, i will undertake this mission with great care 🫡🫡

13. What are your go-to Ao3 filters?

ok i have a confession, i used to be a sort by word count++completed works only++exclude crossovers-kinda person 🤧🤧ANYWAY that was changed, now i only really exclude chat fics (ahaha,,,,theyre not really my go-to genre, like sure they're amusing but i read a really good one once* and it ruined every other chatfic for me)

*this one's for u haikyuu-natics, esp team captain stannies

hm.... i'm not super-duper picky so most of the time i can just scroll through each work's summary and tags.

but if a fandom is popular (or if i dont have the spoons for sifting through works), i stick to just reader inserts HAHAHA, maybe oc x canon if there haven't been any new x reader fics and if there's rlly nothing oough ig i have to write her myself 😭😭 sometimes doe, the curiosity strikes and i'll try looking if there are any fanfics in filipino... i really find it interesting to see how a chara's dialogue reads if theyre speaking in tagalog (tbh i think one would have more luck finding filo socmed aus on twt? but i only know about haikyuu socmed aus)

14. Best fanfic tropes ever?

oH...there are too many... u can't make me choose the best out of all my faves that's unfair 🥺jk lol

i read* this jamikali fic (i like my ships with a bit [read: a LOT] of tragedy/disaster-ness to them. it's so so so compelling to read!) and i just love the "Dubiously Unrequited Love" tag. bcs yes, the feelings are technically mutual, but there is a whole slew of other factors keeping the relationship from being a thing, which it could be a thing, but there's also that awareness that it won't last, sometimes a couple doesn't have to be endgame for the love to mean something, ykw?

this entire oneshot series....has me in a chokehold... my introduction to "Non-Sexual Intimacy" (and "Non-Sexual Nudity" i guess?) like??? holy shit??? the tension?? the way op just encapsulates the poignancy of being in such a vulnerable position without teetering too much into the cliche of roëmænce it has me On My Knees!! (like i love my smut and romance cliches, but some days i jus want a liiiitle bit more spice and variety)

Shoutout to the "Unreliable Narrator"++"Ambiguous Ending" combi that reaaaaally makes you work for understanding the plot, idk how to word it but being able to leave Just Enough Breadcrumbs and having enough trust in your readers to Get what ur implying, also forcing me to reread the fic immediately is so foul (in a good way). like there's an enjoyment in a good satisfying read, and then there's the Itch of never being sure in your interpretation, the feeling that u just need to go over it another time, spot another detail u missed, get wrecked all over again, rinse and repeat. idk i love fic.

27. If someone wanted to make you a creative gift, what's the thing that would make you the happiest?

oh anything featuring my fave charas is sure to make me happy! i mean i'm just not super picky abt gifts. well, maybe a creative gift has to be smth that can last a long while? (a strong hoard-ability kaya idk im senti??)

as long as the thought and intent was there, i'm already happy enough🥰💕💕 but i guess in the context of getting fic gifted to you, probably what matters most to me is that the writer enjoyed the process of making it as well. (i'm kinda drawing off of my experience writing this fic for one of m'oomfies and the vdays drabbles*** so i could be just rambling who knows?**)

(art appreciation ask questions, please bug me to rb some underrated art and fic)

#dellet-asks #oooh i was reading national hot dad alliance back it was still in progress thats d kind of haikyuu stannie i am oopsie #ACTUALLY WAIT... im suddenly remembering abt wcidfy in its draft-draft stages #the placeholder used to be an exchange betw yuu ace and deuce in tagalog (smtimes banter hits better in ur native lang) #i try to put Some kind of substance on my wips instead of leaving them blank with only a title #*i lied i reread that jamikali fic whenever i want to feel smth. #jamikali mention #jamiazu mention #**on a more personal note i think ive always had that sense of sentimentality in my gifts #like during my highschool class's christmas exchange gifts i alw wanted a heartfelt letter along w my gift #it didnt matter if the gift was jus snacks or smth not on-theme i cared abt the words from the gift giver lmao #words are hard so ig it makes me happy to see someone overcome that anyway #***about those last 3 vdays drabble requests... ill finish em... the ideas are brewing i just need spoons #nerenda

[rivilu]

While we all know about Hawke's character-assasination in inquisition, I personally remain.. preplexed? a morbid kind of impressed? with how that game also managed to butcher my Warden with only about 5 lines of dialogue referring to him and a letter.

#dragon age #dai critical #mostly everything leliana says #because look. they were friends in origins. But it was doomed from the get-go #and that's kind of the beauty of it in origins isn't it? The setting of war makes a lot of room for relationships that would in any other- #place in time- any other scenario be impossible- to happen! #for Orion this applies to Sten and Morrigan too. #The whole thing of- one day you will walk out of Denerim and into a life that will entirely contrast my every value; #Stealing Dalish artifacts. Becoming Arishok. Working as left hand of the Divine. #Next time we see eachother chances are we will no longer be on the same side #we both know this but tonight we still gather around the campfire. we still sing. we still laugh; exchange gifts and talk about the world. #it's bittersweet yes but it's the type of tragedy that feels like everyone involved already knows and is at peace about it #So when inquisition comes around and Leliana tells me Orion is still a close friend of hers? It feels like it cheapens the whole thing #Yes the devs can't possibly account for every possible way either installment can be played just for those small moments #But that is WHY they should either be bringing the old protagonists back as playable or simply not include them at all #The warden I made would not even leave room to question that he and leli are now on hostile terms #and he CERTAINLY would not send a polite little letter to a force whose purpose is to restore the chantry to power #And then you have the throne room chatter. which i straight up hate im not going to be poetic about it #the fucking da keep remains horrendous #oh we desperately need to have shithead npcs shittalk the hof . what? your hof did NOTHING that would warrant that? haha too bad #you simply can't pick what you actually DID in those quests #You found Bevin didnt take the sword and just gave them 5 gold out of the goodness of your heart? No you didnt #You just persuaded the random mercenaries in the gnawed noble tavern to leave? No you killed them #it infuriates me

[rahabs]

I have given up entirely on my birthday this year after today.

#text #chey.txt #Mmm less than a week away and I'm already like. Cool. Better than getting my hopes up for another year only to have them dashed I suppose #So we won't be doing anything for it as usual I assume #We are just curled on the couch miserably #With nothing to look forward to but bills and bills and more fucking bills as the cost of living in this shithole country soars #My sisters gets gifts and dinners #I get told it's 'too expensive' #I know it's stupid to whinge it's not that I never get things in general but #My birthdays have been shit since I turned 19 #And I was left writing exams while my family had the trip of a goddamn lifetime to Disney World. #It's been ten years of shit ever since. #And they didn't mean to leave me there they just #Forgot that university exams were in April; I'm the oldest child #But still. #My birthday has been forgotten in other years since #I'm just like. A little. #Upset. #That on top of having to pay for the new dishwasher and to fix my fireplace etc etc #Which is nearly $2000 #I'm being told I have to repay my parents for other things #While they drop 2k on dog collars for my younger sister.

[zappedbyzabka]

Kreerence <3 (gnaws on ceiling fan)

#The way Kreese is so possessive and obsesssive about Johnny is so good #The way Kreese would not hesitate to kill someone for him. He’s so fuckin obssessed he nearly killed JOHNNY #We never see him show a soft spot unless it’s with Johnny or women….and don’t even get me started on what that implies #He would literally throw Daniel off a cliff ZERO hesitation if Johnny wanted it. He would be elated actually #Daniel is nothing more than a pest to him. it’d be like squishing a bug in his eyes #but alas Johnny isn’t into killing people. He’s still so soft at heart even after all his training #and ​still seems to LIKE Daniel (a nice guy with a good soul and gentle hands) in some ways. which is so damn annoying to Kreese #And gosh Johnny’s love for him. So wild and confused. wanting his love back and to make him happy. Make him TELL him he’s happy #Kreese was at his absolute lowest after he lost Johnny for his own actions #for hurting whats precious to him. For losing everything important #That’s why he didn’t leave Johnny alone throughout the entirety of CK #Johnny really said ‘fuck off and learn to treat me right’ #Kreese: WaH Baby no I care about you more than anyone come back— #can’t wait to see how this pathetic❤️ behaviour continues in the new season #But what would have happened if Johnny had stayed after the choking? came back the next day to Kreese who was like a bitey dog with its tai #between it’s legs. staring at the marks on Johnny’s neck with disgust. he likes leaving his marks on Johnny #Likes hurting people with no mercy—But god. not Johnny. At least Not this much. How can he possibly make it up? #He does end up making it up. Gets Johnny back by slowly allowing himself to love better #at least with Johnny. Now they cuddle on the couch together and buy each other holiday gifts #Gosh I could talk about them so much #john kreese #kreerence #tw possessive behavior #tw unhealthy relationship #Turned healthy

[illumiera]

it's amazing how i always feel something within me shift once spring comes and a little bit of sun comes out. i smile a lot in this kind of weather. i feel like saying "hello!" when i see the blossoms or the magnolias or the new leaves or the daffodils. the body feels light, everything feels possible, even when some aspects of life are very dark. as mary oliver said, "well, who doesn't want the sun after a long winter?"

#lollygagging with lumi #i think life gives you little gifts often if you look for them #it's been just over five months since the worst day of my life so far #i remember looking at the trees losing their leaves and doubting if i'd still have my grandma when they came back again #but the leaves are coming back and she's still with us and still herself and that too is a gift

[lesbeet]

*bolts upright in bed* DO MY HOUSEPLANTS KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE THEM

#oh yeah i'm a houseplant bitch now #it's actually getting to be a problem lmfao in the little over a month since i moved ive collected 21 plants 😬 #my brother in law told me about an app that reminds you when to water (that was the main reason ive killed plants in the past) #and it sparked a hyperfixation but i genuinely still love taking care of them even weeks later #i really miss my dog but don't really have the money to spend on a pet right now so in the meantime it's nice to have smth to care for yk #(in my defense a little bit 6 of those plants are in my classroom but. the rest are in my apartment lol) #it all started with one baby spider plant that my friend propagated for me as a housewarming gift and now it's a full grown (ha) obsession #i have a spider; pearls and jade pothos; blue star fern; aloe vera;( #jade; wandering jew (affectionate); 2 pileas; heart shaped philodendron+ a brasil #a peace lily i got for $10 (!!!!) on fb marketplace #a corn plant i got for $6 at the grocery store #2 zz plants; a snake plant; a fishbone cactus; a tiger jaw; a watermelon pepperomia; and a hoya #i think that's all of them lmfao #anyway im having a blast ♥️ #oh and i bought a jewel orchid starter plant on etsy last night bc the leaves are insane looking #oh the aloe vera sad face is a typo. i love her