#and i wsnt to do that in life !

[demadogs]

just discovered through tiktok that some girls have been shaving their widows peak for years cuz they hate it????? you share a physical trait with a vampire and you DONT LIKE IT????

#i have one and ive never even thought about it like its such a small thing to hate?? #if you are young and impressionable DONT DO IT OH MY GOD #you will literally have to maintain it for like the rest of your life unless you wsnt to suffer through a painfully awakard phase #if you fr cant stand it just get bangs

[clits-and-clips]

Since writing the affirmations and starting manifestation again, I've actually been in a much better headspace. It's crazy how things align, and you end up where you need to be, especially through pain

#txt #have been reading the affirmations every day twice a day sometimes #doing my intentions and manifesting what i wsnt #which is mainly independence #also a good relationship with my ex from here #mainly stuff for me tho #and the full moon on Wednesday which is in scorpio which is his sun sign #will be a big release and maybe i can let go a bit or a lot lol #i need to move on and focus on myself and what i want in life and doing it all on my own #with support obviously but ive never been fully independent and im so ready for the blessings and the open doors #i dont know if ill truly ever be over him but i have to try for my own sanity at this point #i dont want to manifest anything selfish like him coming back to me because it probably wont happen anyway lmao #i hope i dont sound crazy lmao but coming back into my spiritual journey is definitely what i need #connecting with myself and my purpose feels like the only thing i can do rn #have a driving lesson tomorrow but in all honesty i could just go do the test and pass cause ive been driving forever and im good at it #just need to practice certain things but im nearly there! so close i can feel it and see it #anyway i hope i can keep this energy up and continue to head in a positive direction because it feels really good #if i need to cry about him and the loss then i will but im not going to dwell on it too much #i just need to take it as a lesson and let it go :) #cause at the end of the day i really did lead myself here whether it was his choice to end it or not #blah

[theood]

Have to a call a job place back and it's giving me.so much fucking dread to do it

#elias howls #I just. i never wsnt to work anywhere. I really dont want to work there. i do not. but eveyones going to be mad at me if i dont tske the job #amd everyones already so fucking mad at me for not having a job and being stupid snd not going to college and not having friends and for not #making news one and not being able to do fucking anything #im so stressed over this and it's so fucking stupid I'm so fucking stupid its just a job so fucking what the manager put me off. boohoo #and its. ive been thinking since the interview that oh. no. i dont want to work thrte. that interview truly made me Not Want Too but I have #to right? because its the only place that has reached out. so i have to fucking take it or im wasting everyone's time and making them more #mad for having to keep fucking job searching. #my life is in fucking shambles. i dont even know why i do anything anymore 👍 like i can't do shit no fucking wonder i cant get hired look #at me

[bigothteddies]

maybe a house would be nice. admittedly I am only saying that because I realized I could have a housewarming party and try to invite my favorite people to come visit

#unimportant thoughts #itd be so fun! just imagining sharing my space with the people i love and having them in my space to celebrate it #its all I could want ! im gonna be daydreaming about it sctually #i mean i still could do that with an apartment BUT less space also noise restrictions #UGH i could throw a yearly christmas party! #my family had a big christmas party every year when i was a kid with some families we were close with :( #i miss it a LOT #nostalgic about the fact that there were kids my age i could play toys with and eat at the kids table sure but STILL #i could do that for my friends ! #i could maybe cover a plane ticket or two and get some of my favorite people together for a nice dinner and sleepover ;( #i could decorate and cook a meal and have wrapped gifts for everyone under the tree :( #meatz has a friend that throws a big halloween party every year and i really admire it #to throw and host a party rvery year where the prople you love can gather and see each other snd have a good time #is a PRICELESS fucking thing to provide and its something i admire #DOING things and hosting events and making stuff happen is a Big Deal #its a value and service many people dont appreciate #fortunately its been BEAT into me by the BMX scene #that the most importsnt thing you can do for BMX isnt to post your opinions online #but to host your own event to provide for the sport your own way to get people involved and to have a good time #and i wsnt to do that in life ! #its hard ive arranged beach trips where no one shows up ive hosted movie nights where people leave halfway through #but I know ill find people that want to do things and hang out just as badly as I do !

[arsenicflame]

anyway ive been thinking a hell of a lot about my past experiences with the nhs for my mental health and it just. makes me feel so fucking defeated

like even if i was prepared to go out n try n get help and do everything that goes with that its. not gonna fucking get me anywhere is it? im just gonna get brushed aside and dumped back out the system and ignored if i imply i think its more than simple situational depression

i cant do anything about this. i dont get a choice. i cant get the help i need and i simply dont have the energy to fight for myself. i don't even really want to try. im stuck like this for the rest of my life

#nyxtalks #vent #i could expand on bits in here but its my vent n i don't care to rn #i dont want to fight i dont wsnt to try i just want it to be over #and if that means doing something myself? so be it #its not like ive got any other choice #i cant live like this for the rest of my life

[trafficpan-ic]

Remind me why i am doing this

#i just wsnt to have fun? #not worht it? idk #in a few months im going to stockholm a'd actualky stressing out bcs of it #if i cant even go away for 2 days with friends #hox can i do it to a xhole other country plane and all with a clncert in it xith a friend a'd her sister #yh nope i dont see it anymore #xhy can people just do this betwee' work and all? #you all crazy #so full panic #want to ca'cel my whole life #and be in the comfort of ly own home #i just xant to have fun with friends???? #😭😭😭😭 #i just 😭😭😭😭

[medicaltechnician]

back in my pissy at some people in my friend group a little bit era!!! ✨✨

i am just gonna, not be online and social until new years i think. (might be online a little. Just want to get away from everything though. Still will be active and spreading info on twt so maybe /maybe/ it’ll get thru some of their heads.)

just, dont want to talk to some of em again. In my evil era. All I see is the worst in people era. Tired era. 🙄 In my wish I was ignorant again but i cant even wish that because of everything era.

#ker talks #broskies is 0230 like #i just wanna sleep #and get thru xmas and then get on a bus and go to my dads and disconnect from my stupid life in this city #more and more it seems appealing to restart my life in another city #and just leave all my friends behind #theres like. 1 i want to keep. #and they wanna move out anyways so LMAO #it sort of sucks the one person who i actually think would be healthy to keep in my life is just about to graduate hs. #I would fucking love to keep my friends in uni but y’all suck. #>://// need to get new friends. how does one do that idk im not very socialblr #literatly my entire friend group rn i made friends with thru my bestie #who im sort of :/ at #but feel a strong sense of loyalty towards to the point i think its detrimental to me #and i have no idea how to make friends outside of mutual friends #id really like a responisble friend group who was out creating thing and i could help with creative projects #really thinking im being held down. #God I just want to sleep man #like just i wsnt to go to my dads rn #i need to talk to him bout all this or like reset while im there

[lemongogo]

yall post grad isnt it

#post grad life.still debating thr phd route #tho thts gna be suck x10000000 i dont thjnk im gna do it or if i will maybe i master out teehee #THIS SUCKSKSSSS ITS SO BORING EVERYONES SO BUSY #n when i get home im so tired i dnt wven want ro do anything. homer simpson couch core #anyways when ppl said life after college is fun.they r literally lying to u #college wsnt even fun bc half of it was online but it still felt ljke SMTHINGGG #me when ii when i mwe when w

[aropride]

what if i made an exact replica of my house in the sims ..

#insane thing to do & it wouldnt be exact #for lots of reasons partically just like #game mechanic stuff? like how close u can place things #partially cuz i dont wsnt to figure out the exact scale of sims to real life #partially cuz my house is a disaster and is genuinely being held together by duct tape in some spots #BUT ! i think itd be fun idk #text #i wouldnt post it obviously im not giving u guys my floor plan godbless

[bulletsfrank]

we took tenacious to the vet and he got blood work and x-rays done and all of his organ function is fine, though he has high white blood cell count due to infection, but they aren't exactly sure what said infection is. i don't have the money for them to be able to take CT scans or x-rays of the inside of his throat and mouth to check for tumor/polyps, so he very well could have one of those too... but as it is, he still isn't eating, he still isn't moving, and he isn't breathing well at all. he got antibiotics at the vet but we aren't even sure if that's the issue. if he doesn't eat by monday they say to call but it's been two days since he ate last. i can't sleep. i've never been this scared in my life

#block me block me block me NOW if youre thinking Its just A Cat whats The deal #tenacious has been the center of my lifr dince i was a cjild. hes saved my life so msny times. he is my #best friend. it feels like someone is tearing my hesrt out sbd stomp8ng on it #ive cried aboutnhim dying while hes healthy sutting on me... i wsnt to die i am not strong enough plesse dont take away my kitty #i had 1000 dollsrs bht its still not e ough whst do i do

[girlwithfish]

iwent to dc once as a kid rheres a pic of me w my mom n siblings holding a pink ds somewhere when i was like 7 or 8

#my mom loves dc and virginia in general. kind of crazy she has lived a lot of places. and had a whole life #b4 #im excited to leave the state of nc bc i havent gone on a trip or left the state since 2020 it feels like 4ever #maybe i dont want to b in nc rn.so im excited to go to dc even tho itll b a shortt trip nd i wont do anything besides go to the alex g show #nd come back #but idk maybe we could stay nd do one thing or idk. #i just wsnt to go smewhere so bad i want to go on a short trip somewhere after i graduate or somethinggg #little paranoid my car will break down or smth bad will happen when im 4 hrs away tho Idk #irs a 4 hr drive so not too long but im paranoid abt car stuff a lot even tho my car runs fine i think but #i alwaus feel it will break down or ill hit something nd bad things will happem

[myfirstandlast]

i’ve been so so depressed thinking about school and how just . clueless i was with everything and being blinded by the envy and the desire to be friends with and be like all the cool interesting people that seemed to surround me and walk straight through me but for so many reasons i have this ridiculous difficulty with seeing people as multi-faceted and understanding that they could have cultivated a personality and life that seems to take so much effort and equally be putting effort into work and career and studies and i just. wasted everything. years and years of not knowing what i want to do not knowing much of anything seriously at all and just thinking it was going to work out all laissez-faire like those cool people make it seem but suddenly they’re all talking about their classes and everything and i’m realising oh i really am just as stupid as i was trying to avoid acknowledging. like i actually don’t know what to do with my life at all and because i’m antisocial and trapped in my parents’ house i can’t have a crisis while living on my own with friends to talk to that i literally don’t have so i know i’m just gonna have to kill myself soon. it is so. bleak. and so utterly depressing and i have to spend my last moments with the people who probably understand me the least on earth. i feel shame and i feel just complete and utter misery for everything wasted and everything lost

#i don’t know how to recover. i cant. im so empty and worthless as a person i have no desire to do anything #i have no idea what passions i feel anymore if any #i wish i could pass away in my sleep but i think such peaceful death is reserved for only a certain few #oh i hate my life so deeply. it makes me wsnt to pull my guts out my throat

[depressedzelda]

kind of thinking maybe I am finally reaping some of the many consequences of loving to drink so much as my liver pretty much started swelling up and hurting halfway through today umm <3 that coupled with the general mental confusion that I can no longer tell if it's normal or not + the complete lack of appetite I almost always have. ok maybe these things are related

#i have technically been drinking heavily for 7 years now. so hm #doesnt seem normal to wake up okay and then hakfway thriugh the day BAM your liver feels extended and hurts. and is tenderrr 2 the touch ok #i fuckin hate going to the doctor i dont wsnt to and she doesnt even like me and the other ppl there are rude too lawl #augdh. aughh fine fuck. but i cannot imagine quitting drinking it sucks so bad #i Need it. i Need it i Cannot live without it. i cannor Fathom not drinking regularly #its like the one fuckin thing that i get to do that relaxes me and makes life tolerable for a bit GOD GOD GOD #. bleak. sooo upset rn idk what to do lol #i hope the pain goes away <3 and i hope i dont cave into drinking and the fuckin pub my mom is forcing me to go to after my 9 hour shift #tomorrow :)

[volatilechemicalz]

so many people I want to talk to . obviously I should do anything but talk to them

#noodle talks #not art #augh . i wanna make friends n shit on this website but unfortunately my brain is terrible n i cant because . scared #bahhh #ill just assume everyone knows that i wsnt to talk to them and wait for them to reach out . surely there will be no consequence to this #<- /j this has literally never worked in my entire life even once but i keep doing it #🔪

[h3nsh1n]

reading the things people post here apparently my unpopular opinion is that is always bad to cut someone off without warning and explanation unless that person is actually dangerous to you/has abused you

#like if a friend just sompletely stopped talking to me for no reason and didn't guve me an explanation i would go insane #but people here seem to thibk that is justified if you just don't want to talk to them or sum??? #like you don't have to keep people you don't want in your life but at least tell them why you are doing that #and if you don't expect people to be justifiedly mad about it #this talking about someone that isn't an abuser or want to hurt you of course #but if you just don't wsnt to hang out with someone #and specially if you have been friends for a while or have a intense relationship #tell them at least jesus

[orphudice]

i am exhausted actuslly

#i wsnt to do nothing ever in my life