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x-liv25-jamieswife · 1 month

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avery head canons

@ariscats requested these, and avery's my fav girl so of course i'm gonna make them. hope you like them<3! (i apologize for any spelling mistakes). @catapparently helped me with some of these.

avery loves phoebe bridgers

she's also secretly a swiftie (she was a hugeeee love story stan when she was younger bc she dreamt of a love like that)

she relates to nothing new (ft. phoebe bridgers). she's always blasting that song in her room, crying. (jamie finds out she feels like that song and tries to comfort her by telling her she isn't just something that everyone will get tired of eventually).

she lovesss thrifting her own clothes.

avery pretends to hate her new wardrobe but she secretly likes it.

she used to only drink black coffee but then she found out she actually really likes flavored coffee (vanilla, caramel etc). she loves making her own little coffees at home (xander loves it too)

she went to the eras tour with a reputation/midnights crossover outfit

she loves candles, she has a ton of them in her room

the sheffield grayson kidnapping affects her more than she lets on (sometimes she imagines sheffield walking behind her while she's taking walks and stuff or she'll see his face everywhere)

she has an addiction to those shitty app store games

she used to be a huge star wars fan. she would force libby to watch the movies with her.

sometimes, during family dinners, she'll look at all the people around her (libby, max, the hawthornes, rebecca, etc) and think about how lucky she is to be loved by so many people. she sometimes tears up cause she used to wish to be that loved when she was younger. jamie always notices but knows that she doesn't like it when people point it out.

she loves fanfiction (xander and max introduced it to her)

she loves taking pictures of nature (her and grayson have a shared aesthetic insta account where they post all of their pictures) (i personally really love this one)

avery used to have a percy jackson fan account on insta when she was really young (her mom was her biggest fan) (the hawthornes found the account and find it adorable)

she's a huge percabeth shipper

her favorite book genre is murder mystery (holly jackson stan)

she used to love editing (there was this one percabeth edit of hers to my blood by ellie goulding that went viral)

her mom and her used to love watching rom coms

she used to wonder why no one wanted to be her friend when she was younger (cause she only has max)

ok this one's a bit dark and sad, but we all know she grew up poor in a shitty old town, and that's where you find all the weird creeps. based on the books, she seems to not really be comfortable with physical touch from strangers, so i hc that the reason why is bc walking home from school, she'd sometimes be harassed by these creeps.

she has scars from the bombing and the attempted shooting. she's insecure about them, but jamie always tells her they look beautiful (he also tells her they're proof of how strong she is)

she loves the beach (jamie brings her on dates there all the time)

she tends to get hate comments about her looks (this isn't really a head canon since it was kinda implied in tbh when those people were whispering about her looks (i may be imagining this). sometimes she gets insecure, but jamie always makes sure she knows how beautiful she is by kissing her and whispering sweet nothings in her ear etc. (this one was more of an aj one but oh well, i can never escape them)

avery has really good taste in clothing. her fans are always commenting about how hot she is.

she was times person of the year once

(this one is based off of a pic i saw on pinterest) avery once did a shoot for vogue where she wore a suit vest and nothing underneath and everyone went crazyyy (jamie too). (i'll insert a pic at the bottom)

she's convinced people hate her

she sometimes has nightmares about jamie breaking up with her (jamie proves her wrong in bed if you know what i mean)

she loves interacting with fans (she comments on posts, take pics with them in public, etc)

when libby and her used to live together in lib's apartment and they were struggling to buy food bc of money issues, avery would always leave the food to libby and tell her she ate at the diner (she actually didn't bc she once tried to steal some food but got caught. she didn't want to lose her job so she stopped).

avery secretly loves heels (they make her more confident)

her and rebecca vent to each other sometimes (avery feels really comfortable with her).

she lovesss sushi

absolutely love my girl avery (fav character of all time). i sort of see myself in her so i might be projecting in some of these. she's so underrated and it pisses me off (she easily solos all of the brothers).

#the inheritance games #the hawthorne legacy #the final gambit #the brothers hawthorne #averyjameson #avery grambs #jameson hawthorne #grayson hawthorne #libby grambs #xander hawthorne #maxine liu #she's my favorite character ever

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sweetkpopmusings · 1 year

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jeonghan best friend headcanons <3

a/n: posting this for the lovely anon who requested it ! <3 jeonghan is a libra icon and my best friend's contact photo in my phone is a silly photo of jeonghan like i love him sm actually <333

content: fluff | wc: 0.8k | warnings: none! | pairing: bestfriend!jeonghan x gn!reader | requests: open

he is SUCH a caring best friend

he's so observant with the people he is closest to, which means you can't get away with anything when it comes to jeonghan

he probably knows you're getting sick before you do. he can just tell your sneeze is different and he's making you tea and nagging you about how to avoid getting ill

and you're like bro ?? i just sneezed ??

but a few days later you're down with a cold and he's gloating about the fact he knew you were getting sick like he's being so annoying about it because he's so competitive <3

don't worry he's also dropping off a care package so you can get well soon!!

he jokes that he won't come near you because he doesn't want to catch the plague but in reality he'll come inside and make sure you have enough food, water, blankets, etc.

he also knows when you're overworked/stressed/exhausted before most other people see the signs

so he'll check in on you a lil more frequently but he won't push it until you are ready to open up about it

while he wants to give tons of advice to help you, whenever you vent to him, he just listens very intently and comforts you and validates all your feelings and will only offer his insight when you ask/have finished expressing your thoughts

you get to hear ALL of his laughs. i mean ALL of them!!!

sometimes you're just standing in line getting coffee and he starts laughing because you made a funny face at a weird thing a stranger said

now what that stranger said has become an inside joke and you two will say it to each other every once in a while for a good laugh

you have a lot of lil inside jokes/phrases/sounds/hand gestures that you do together

sometimes they're so strange it's concerning to outsiders but everyone who knows you and jeonghan knows that it's just your special little language :,-)

he has a dumb nickname for you that he uses in every way possible. tbh sometimes you wonder if he even remembers your name because you never hear him say it, he always addresses cards to your nickname, etc

but if someone else uses that dumb nickname ??? jeonghan is immediately >:-( because that's HIS nickname for HIS best friend

it's like a prideful thing that he gets to call you that lol

when you give him a dumb nickname, he laughs so hard the first time you use it that you're worried you broke his brain

he giggles at it every time you say it for about 6 months because it's so funny to him and he thinks you're adorable :,-)

i think he's the type of best friend that wants to know all about your family (whether biological or chosen) and friends

like he's always asking you how so-and-so is doing, did your cousin get that job they wanted, and how was your coworker's dog's birthday

sometimes it's shocking that he remembers so much about people in your life that he's never met but he's genuinely interested because they matter to you! and he's a big fan of you spilling the tea lmfao

he also loves sharing that kind of info with you about his family and friends so you just walk around with a wealth of knowledge on jeonghan's sister's friendgroup drama you and jeonghan gossip about it regularly

big fan of self-care nights!

when he wants to hang out, it pretty much means he wants to sit around, eat food, do face masks, and watch funny videos together

depending on his mood it's either a night filled with chitchat or a night filled with comfortable silence but either way it's some of the most fun you've ever had

he also loves playing games with you

and he cheats every time <3 if you win when he cheats he'll be so proud <3 and brag about it to his members <3

he also definitely teaches you how to cheat so whenever you two are playing games with other friends you can team up and unleash absolute chaos

seventeen complains about there being two jeonghans whenever you're around

and jeonghan's always like "yeah and???" and seungkwan's across the room glaring at you ready to give a big speech on integrity he's just mad because y'all pranked him the day before and dino got video of him looking shocked and embarrassed

it's always fun to watch you two together because after becoming so close you share a braincell and it's so endearing to witness two besties being besties

at the core of it, jeonghan is a super solid best friend who values you and all the wonderful things you bring to the friendship and his life

sometimes jeonghan's babying you. most other times he's being a demon. through it all, he's always showing you how much he loves you and cherishes you <3

i would like to put in a request for one jeonghan thank you very much !

#seventeen #seventeen headcanons #bestfriend!seventeen #seventeen imagines #svt #jeonghan #seventeen jeonghan #seventeen fluff #seventeen x reader #jeonghan x reader #jeonghan fluff #svt jeonghan #svt headcanons #seventeen au #svt au #yoon jeonghan #sweetkpopmusings

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golbrocklovely · 4 months

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you know, I thought i might of been annoying with the amount of asks i send you, and that still might be true but people apparently love me… so im sticking around 😂 gotta build this aussie anon fandom… buy the merch (its just a tshirt with koala ears on the anon icon and ‘xplr me daddy’ across the shoulder blades)

also absolute fkn ditto to your post abt snc needing a villain era. especially colby. I learnt just the other day that apparently he goes thru this m drama every time he’s snapped with a girl. like every time, for years. that’s gotta be so horrible. like imagine being the constant reason your friends or dates get harassed online just for being around you. you’d feel like poison. i truly hope he finds someone who couldnt give two flying quacks abt that stuff. heck, if it were me (lemme dream, alright) and i knew this wasn’t just a once off thing… i was going to say my acct would be private and i’d have ‘message from strangers’ turned off… but i already have all that… Colby, I’m ready!!! lmao i jk i jk (or do I 👀)

anyway, back to colby fighting in the clubs. you said he’s possessive… im curious about that. like in a protective way over the people he cares about, or actually like “this is my person, back off” type? either way, hella shmexxyy

- aussie anon

omg this is such a long response so i'm sorry in advance lol

haha no you're totally okay to keep sending in asks. no one has a problem with it, especially me :)

and omg an "xplr me daddy" shirt would be hysterical and i'm surprised they haven't done one (even jokingly) before lol

and yes, it's not just girls colby is interested in either. it's EVERY girl - date, friend, stranger - it doesn't matter. if fans can find out who she is, they will send her hate. or at the very least bombard her with questions as to how she knows colby, what's he like, ect. it's honestly very embarrassing to be in this fandom sometimes strictly bc of that type of shit.

i've talked about how i've felt on colby's love life ad nauseum on here, but i don't mind speaking on it more. i genuinely believe this fandom needs a HUGE reality check. bc there are too many ppl in this fandom that believe they have a say in what he does with said love life. and now it's bled over into sam's.

the golden child apparently can do wrong now lol

like on xplrclub, they literally APOLOGIZED (half-heartedly, but still said sorry) for the pics of them with the girls leaking over new years. and that's just fucking bonkers to me. there is no reason two 27 year old men should be saying sorry to a bunch of random girls they have never met before and don't even know exist bc they are going out and having fun and dating. and what makes it worse is snc felt the need to do this. they don't need to explain anything to us, especially about their private lives.

and the amount of fucking fans i saw saying "well if you wanted to have a private life, keep it private. don't post things." and it's like…… idk how many times i have to say this, but SNC ARE NOT YOUR FRIENDS. them not telling you about a girl they are fucking with is not a betrayal. they don't know you. they couldn't even pick you out of a line up of two ppl. stop thinking your opinion is neccessary, especially when it comes to their personal lives. you aren't owed an explanation. idc if you've been in this fandom for years, given them tons of money, have a fan account dedicated to them on every site, repost their content all the time - NONE of that matters. you are a random person, you are a statistic. a view count. and while yes, snc care about us, that doesn't mean they KNOW you or that your opinion is VALID.

you wouldn't like a random person coming onto your account and bitching at you about your life choices, right? so why do you think snc deserve that? bc they're public figures? NOPE, not a good enough reason. you want to bitch at them about content and the choices they make on that? that's fine. but private, personal shit they do is none of your concern or business.

and i know there are plenty of fucking ppl that will call me a hypocrite bc god forbid i talk about snc's love lives - but reality is i know my opinion isn't worth shit. i'm not coming up into their comments, @ ing them every chance i get, just to give them my two cents. i do my best to keep it light hearted and silly. none of what i talk about is serious or direly needed info. which is also why i do it on a site they aren't privy to. they're not on here. me complaining into the void doesn't effect them. and i'm also extremely aware of the fact that i don't know everything. i don't know the full story, never will, and i'm not OWED it either.

sorry, that was a really long rant. but i'm just…. so done with the fandom rn lol i've been reading ppl complaining for too long about shit they don't deserve to complain about and it's just annoying at this point.

but to bring it back to your ask - i hope colby, and sam too, find a girl that fucking PARADES that she's dating him. of course, with colby or sam's consent. if i was dating one of them, i would rub in these fans' faces, and i mean that wholeheartedly. aww, you're upset i'm fucking your man? TOO BAD WOMP WOMP lmao

and as for colby being possessive, he's said it in some tweets in years' past. he's tweeted out before "Im such a protective, jealous person wow" and "I'm overly protective" followed by someone asking him "so that means if you had a girlfriend you'd protect her a lot" and he replied with "protect her with my life". so, i see him as being a very loyal person, who is protective of the ppl he deems as "his", so to speak.

in a relationship, my guess is that while he's not obsessive or demanding, he is very much like "you are my girlfriend". i don't see him to be the type to say you can't talk to this guy or be friends with these ppl, nothing like that. but he reads to me like the type to keep his arm around you while at the club, that way any guy that sees you know you're taken by him.

also side note, i know as a woman i should be like i'm my own person, i'm no one's but my own, blah blah blah. but a guy that's just a twinge bit possessive is hot. i'm sorry, it's my red flag and i know it is sksksks

#ask #personal #colby brock #sg ll #cb ll

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kiddosaurus · 11 months

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(hi im so sorry i wanted to just agree with a point you made and then wrote a full rant feel free to ignore me/delete this ask)

I definitely agree about the average age feeling like it's dropping (I also think that's just the Internet as a whole, coming from someone who literally got their first tumblr account at 11. also think it's because kids don't lie about their ages as much anymore, like I was lying until I was at least 15 and still vague about it until I turned 18) and part of me gets a little concerned by it? like yeah, I definitely showed interest in things like agere once I hit puberty age but most of my actual age regressing/dreaming I've only done since I was 16 when I had gotten past the initial wave of that

maybe it's the old age (I'm literally 18 lol) but I do worry when I see super young people in this community about the effects that regressing may have on them and their future development? or at least when I see 13-14 year olds post saying they're looking for cgs like I get so scared some weirdo is going to see it and use it as an opportunity to gain some power over them or gain their trust because the kid is too young to be able to realise what's happening

i hope it's alright for me to respond to this, just lmk if you want me to delete this reply

i feel a lot of what you're saying tbh. i still try to be understanding towards the super young folks, as i myself was super young when i first discovered the agere community, but idk. i was 12 at the time, but my situation was fairly odd compared to most folks (at that point i was already well into puberty, and there were times where i was involuntarily regressing from stress and trauma long before i knew what agere was, and finding the community helped me put a name to my experiences), so even then it's still hard to understand a lot of the youngest people in the community now, as the reasons for them getting into it are VASTLY different than any of my own. im only a couple months short of 18, and it never fails to shock me how old this stuff makes me feel :')

i DEFINITELY agree on the whole thing about worrying over possible issues with development and safety, though. i do feel like there's a (for lack of a better way to describe it) "honeymoon phase" for a lot of young teens discovering something like this that makes them happy and helps them cope, where they put a huge focus on it in a ton of aspects of their life, and that's something they just gotta get outta their system before they start to even things out. however, i definitely worry about development for kids who don't seem to learn how to balance agere with the rest of their life; any coping mechanism (including the healthy ones) can become unhealthy if it takes over your life in ways that cause repeated stress or harm, which seems to be the case for a lot of young folks discovering agere.

the whole cg safety thing is valid too. seeing so many 13-14 year olds giving out tons of personal info to strangers in hopes that they'll find a cg that they've never even talked to always makes me anxious. i don't think there's anything wrong with them wanting someone like that in their lives, and i think there are ways to kind of explore that while still staying safe, but the way people actually go about it is worrying. like... when i was young and discovering agere, at least there were plenty of adults in the community who made an effort to teach younger folks how to stay safe with stuff like this, but that doesn't seem to be as much of a thing anymore since the demographic has shifted to be so young as a whole and there are way more teens than adults. 2017-2018 was a very different time compared to 2023.

im sorry that this reply got so long, this whole thing has just been on my mind and it's nice hearing someone who at least understands part of what im saying

#asks

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themollyzone · 1 year

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unfluencing

Lee Tilghman, aka former wellness influencer Lee From America, was featured in the NYTimes recently for her turn away from influencing and into a murky post-influencing lifestyle. I find her story fascinating!

I don't think I would have known about Lee if I hadn't been working at Well+Good. At the peak of her influence, she was posting elaborate smoothie bowls layered with neat toppings and gooey nut butters, managing her PCOS symptoms through something called "seed cycling" (basically eating different seeds at different times of the month to balance hormones), drinking gallons of matcha... Her wellness practices were incredibly photogenic, therefore perfect for IG, and she used the platform to reach an audience of people who were delighted by dreamy parfaits and who had serious health issues they were hoping to address outside of the realm of the doctor's office.

Classic wellness conundrum: there is way more to Health than prescription drugs and one-size-fits-all medical recommendations ("lose 10 pounds"); women's health especially is a realm of a ton of understudied pain; "wellness" of course is a zone ripe for scams, charlatanism and trickery. Plant medicine, for example, is thousands of years old and absolutely has real effects...but do you want to consume that ashwagandha in the form of a gummy marketed by a Kardashian?

I reached out to Lee's business email once during my time at W+G when I was producing videos. I want to say I was looking for a source to talk about smoothies, maybe matcha? Her response was a blunt ask for the editorial budget, which was zero, and I never responded to her. Her request was fair enough — in the Times article she said she her peak influencer take was something like $300,000 a year, which is obviously a healthy income, but also seems like not enough money to essentially live one's entire life online, post photos of every meal and beverage, act as a sounding board for strangers' health problems in the comments of IG posts, etc.

Lee's wellness arc ended with an announcement that her commitment to a life of juices and yoga and avoiding grains and "toxins" had left her orthorexic, and seeking treatment. Since then, she ditched the smoothieposting, had a brief interlude where she put up a lot of pictures of her rescue dog, was at one point going to study to become an interior designer, and now has landed in a position where she appears to be technically unemployed (by a traditional employer that is), publishing a newsletter to 20,000 readers, and hosting a workshop where she shows other influencers how to detach from and leave behind their influencer careers. She bills herself as an "ex wellness influencer recovering from too much kale."

I find her thing so interesting because it seems like even by calling herself as an ex influencer, she is now even still influencing...as an ex influencer. Influence as I am increasingly seeing it, is more than just posting about stuff you like and consume and having others like and consume it too — it is the embodiment of a combination of knowledge and taste that can only be expressed through you, yourself, your life. And the expression, ideally, involves some sort of personal stakes. People can get health advice from anywhere on the internet, and smoothie recipes from anywhere on the internet, but when that info is embodied in a person who you can look at and judge — judge their weight, the quality of their skin, the size and cleanliness of their apartment, their success in romance, the vacations they take, whether it looks like they're really having a good time — it becomes weighted, parasocial, and of course extreeeemely valuable to brands.

I have no idea what the content of Lee's un-influencing course is. I would imagine some of it would have to do with the process of detaching from the steady flow of attention that comes to you when you live your life online and others admire it. I can't imagine how addictive that shit is. I think we're only at the beginning of an understanding the addictiveness of internet attention, both good and bad. It's something I have to personally be careful about! I see a change in my own mood when I post something that a lot of people see and like. There's a certain mania that I feel when something I post goes viral. I recently put a TikTok up on the Alt's account that ended up with a modest amount of views, and it freaked me out. That many people have seen me, that many people have judged me in some way.

I feel like the common female American dream of the past century has involved monetizing being the center of attention. For a long time that meant being a movie star. Then it was being a model — runway model, Victoria's Secret model. Now it's being an influencer. Get paid to travel, paid to wear clothes, paid to do makeup, paid to eat food, paid to be. But the gap between the center of attention and the source of the attention is closing. You could have probably holed up in Hollywood while starring in motion pictures on a studio contract and stayed relatively unbothered. Maybe you'd have to answer some fan mail. Now you have a thousand people a post screaming at you because you once said you were avoiding gluten and now you're eating a bagel. Is it worth it to build a particular brand online if it means you can't change? Even though you're no longer peddling a lifestyle that contributed to your own eating disorder?

I keep saying privacy is going to be the last real luxury. I'm imagining some kind of demifluencer, who has taste and style and a point of view, but who hasn't posted in a way that has people drawing floor plans of their apartment or stalking their preferred workout class.......monetizing mystery.......

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finsterhund · 1 year

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Today is a frustrating day.

Went to get my prescriptions and that went well. Then I got to go to value village after begging my roommate.

Friday must be the day they put out new stuff because there were a ton of parasites there. Thrift flippers. The scalpers of the secondhand world. People who buy everything even remotely worth anything from thrift stores and then toss them up on etsy for super inflated prices. And they can afford to buy the entirety of X Y Z in value village all at once because they're upper middle class at the lowest. They're the justification thrift stores then use to super inflate their prices to near ebay rates also. And it leads to things in glass cases and security guards and essentially gentrification. And the end result is the people who actually rely on thrift stores having a harder time. God how I fucking hate them. There were two specifically that really grinded my gears. One had two carts. One piled HIGH. to overflowing. With toys. and they were an ultra mega bitch to the kid they brought with them. And pretty much anyone who entered the toy section also. The kid wanted to keep one stuffed animal for themselves from the literal mountain of toys and the grown ass adult was giving them shit and finally relented with a "shut up and put it in the keep pile then." if you have to differentiate a "keep pile" when going to a thrift store you shouldn't be going to a thrift store. Join a pyramid scheme for your military spouse #girlboss side hustle or whatever the fuck you cunts did before the invention of poshmark. Die.

The other thrift flipper had also taken it upon themselves to clear out the trinkets section and had put every single music box in their cart and then they left their cart in the middle of the isle and fucked off somewhere. You know what I did? I took one (1) music box from their cart. I'm kicking myself I didn't take another because I fucking hate these people so much. Price gougers and thrift flippers and scalpers deserve electric chair.

So I leave with my music box and should have been in a much better mood because I got to explore the thrift store today but instead I'm reminded that people who suck exist. It's like having to breathe the same air as a landlord. I guess they're more human than landlords are. Barely.

Then on top of that my roommate got mean to me. I don't know if he tried to gaslight me or if he just forgot but he acted like he was justified in taking all my recycling money from my bottles and cans by telling me that I "didn't put the bottles in the bag" when I distinctly remember doing that. Maybe Scott dragged the bottles out of the bag who knows. But he was going off at me for wanting to go to the thrift store and wanting my bottle returns and such. I was defending myself but had to stop when a complete stranger approached him for some fucking reason to talk about stupid fucking alcohol.

Am I irrationally going of the deep end? Yes. But I'm not doing well mentally.

Also the entire time I've been writing out this vent post my roommate has been pestering the hell out of me to send him "everything you have on PayPal" as if I somehow owe HIM money. I'm not going to obviously.

Christ.

#text post #negative #long post

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chasholidays · 6 years

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You're awesome for doing this again! How about: Clarke is internet crushing on a food blogger and flirts with him over the comments, but he doesn't put his real name online and she has no idea what he looks like. ALSO, she's real life crushing on her BFF's brother Bellamy. Surprise - they're the same person. (please and thank you, I love all of your work!!)

Not to be completely shallow or anything, but Clarke starts reading Grumio’s blog because of a screenshot of his hands.

His hands are the only parts of his body that are really visible on any part of his website, but they’re more than enough for her to decide to follow up on him. She’s always had a thing for hands, and Grumio’s are basically perfect. Clarke is aggressively here for smart boys with perfect hands who know how to cook.

Granted, he knows how to cook in the dorkiest way possible, but Clarke’s kind of into that too. She likes people who are passionate and dedicated, regardless of what the passion is for or the dedication is to.

Unless it’s passion about racism or something. Fuck that.

But Grumio is passionate about Roman cooking. Well, okay, he seems to be passionate about Roman culture in general, but the focus of his blog is on researching and recreating historical cuisine using period-appropriate ingredients and tools. It’s not really the kind of thing Clarke is usually into but, again, he has amazing hands. Every once in a while, he’ll do a video, and even though he just plays music in the background instead of speaking, they’re still pretty much her favorite thing to watch.

And, yes, she knows how sad that is. But Grumio is interesting. He’d have to be, to have gotten the following he has. He’s a popular internet dork who cares deeply about history. She’s not the only one who thinks he’s cool.

Which is probably why she decides to tell Bellamy about him.

There is an irrational part of Clarke that feels wrong, talking to Bellamy about Grumio. After all, Grumio is her internet crush, and Bellamy is her real-life crush, and it feels as though talking about one to the other is crossing the streams. But Bellamy teaches Latin, so she’s brought him up a couple times in her comments to Grumio, and it seems only logical to bring Grumio up to him.

If she’s honest, it’s felt logical for a while, but she was putting it off, and Bellamy reminds her of exactly why as soon as she does it.

“Have you heard of Cooking with Grumio?” she asks, and he frowns in a way that suggests less that he isn’t familiar with the blog and more that he’s confused she that she is.

“Have you?”

“No, I put together a random string of syllables and hit a real thing. You know about it?”

“I’m a Latin teacher,” he says, voice gently teasing. “My students have mentioned it once or twice.”

“Okay, yeah. I probably should have seen that coming.”

“I appreciate the head’s up anyway.” He takes a drink of his beer, and Clarke’s worried it’s going to turn into an awkward silence, but instead it turns into an awkward question. “How did you find it?”

“How does anyone find anything on the internet? I followed a link and liked it enough to add it to my bookmarks.”

“Oh wow, it’s on your bookmarks,” he teases. “That’s the real sign of internet dedication.”

“What, do you not like it?”

He shrugs. “It’s cool, I guess. I approve of anything that’s educational but tricks kids into thinking it’s fun. I just didn’t think it would be your thing.”

“He’s a good writer,” she says, trying to be just as casual. “And it’s interesting. Just because I’m not an ancient Rome enthusiast, it doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate a cool project.”

“I guess so. Well, thanks for letting me know about it.”

“Even if I’m the thousandth person to tell you.”

He smiles; the expression looks a little off to Clarke, but she can’t really figure out why. It’s not like they’re really friends. Clarke is friends with Octavia, and Octavia is close to her brother. They see each other a few times a month, and Clarke tries very hard to not be into him, because, again, Octavia is close to her brother. There’s nothing inherently wrong with dating a friend’s sibling, but given how Octavia and Bellamy grew up, it’s more like dating a friend’s surrogate father figure. Which is definitely a little weird.

None of which matters, because Bellamy’s not interested in her anyway. He’s just an incredibly attractive person she hangs out with sometimes, and they end up talking mostly by default. Everyone else is kind of paired off.

“Hey, you could always hit the Latin thing I haven’t heard about. Stranger things have happened.”

“Are there Latin things you don’t know about?”

“If there are, I wouldn’t know, so–”

She laughs. “So I’ll let you know if I find any other cool blogs.”

“Yeah, I’d appreciate it.”

Comments on post You Asked, Grumio Drank Until He Was Okay With It: Time to Bake Bread

Sea Geez Have you seriously never made bread before???

GrumioDon’t judge, I’m not much of a baker.

Sea GeezReally? Why not? Baking is basically all I’m good at.

GrumioI don’t know. It seems boring. I like trying to figure stuff out, and when I’m baking, I basically have all the answers. Add this much, and if you add any more, you fuck it up.

Also, yeast weirds me out.

Sea GeezYeast weirds you out?

GrumioIt’s ALIVE.

Sea GeezYou eat meat. You know what meat is, right?

GrumioAnd in a life or death situation, I’d probably be fine killing my own food. But I still feel bad for yeast.

Sea GeezThat’s actually kind of adorable.

GrumioThanks, I try.

“So, uh, did you see that Grumio post about Saturnalia?” Bellamy asks. He sounds so profoundly awkward, she can’t help smiling.

“Are you trying to make conversation? Because you’re a lot better at it when you’re not trying. That was so awkward.”

“Thanks. I was just curious. I thought it was pretty cool.”

“Yeah, I liked it too. If I were better at cooking, I might try some of it out.”

“Really?”

“I feel weird reading a food blog where I never try to make any of the recipes. Like I’m missing out.”

He rubs the back of his neck, looking oddly nervous. “I’m not a bad cook,” he offers. “If you ever found one you really wanted to try, I could probably help out.”

It’s the first time he’s ever made any offer to hang out with her one-on-one, which is simultaneously awesome and kind of–suspect. Which is ridiculous, obviously. She and Bellamy are friends. There’s nothing at all suspicious about his offering to help her with cooking. That’s a normal, friendly thing.

“Have you made any yourself?”

“Again, Latin teacher. I do them all the time for school events. The kids love seeing stuff they recognize from Grumio, honestly.”

“So, do you have any favorites? Anything you want to show me?”

“I could probably come up with something. I won’t be offended if you don’t want to,” he adds.

He’s so nervous. About offering to cook for her, of all things.

If it’s suspicious, it’s the best kind of suspicious.

“No, that would be awesome. Was there something in the Saturnalia post you thought would be good? Anything you recommend?”

“The Roman cheesecake balls looked pretty cool. I could probably come up with something else to go with them.”

“A full Grumio meal?”

He smiles a little. “That’s the idea.”

Comments on post Walk Like an Egyptian, Drink Like a Roman

Sea GeezTop three recipes you’ve ever made?

GrumioThat’s like asking me to pick my top three children.

Sea Geez1. Is it?2. How many children do you have?

GrumioI see your transparent attempt to trick me into giving out demographic information and I’m not falling for it. But good effort. Here are some of my favorite recipes for your effort.

Clarke’s never actually been to Bellamy’s apartment, but when she told him about the incredibly sorry state of her kitchen, he invited her over to his place instead. There is something of a datelike feeling to the whole evening, and she’s doing her best to not read into it. After all, they’re already friendly, and this is a logical way to take it a step further to being actual friends.

It’s not a date. Definitely not a date.

When she knocks on the door, he just calls, “It’s open!” and when she goes in, she finds him in the kitchen, apparently reviewing his giant pile of ingredients.

“Wow. You really didn’t have to go to all this trouble.”

“It’s no trouble.”

She makes a show of looking at his crowded counter tops. “Yeah, that’s just clearly a lie. You went to a ton of trouble.”

“I saved the receipts, you said you’d Venmo me.”

“Yeah, but–it’s still a lot of effort. Not just money.”

“I like cooking,” he says, with a shrug. “I don’t mind.”

“You say that now, but you haven’t seen how shitty I am at cooking yet.”

“You can’t be that bad,” he says, with the confidence of someone who has never witnessed her in the kitchen.

“Don’t jinx it,” she says. “What am I doing?”

It should be unspeakably awkward, being not just alone with Bellamy, but in his kitchen, but to Clarke’s surprise, it’s actually pretty fun. He really is a good cook, obviously familiar with not only cooking in general, but all the recipes he’s showing her. And even though she’s about the farthest thing possible from an expert, Bellamy is mostly patient, and at least amused when she fucks up.

The two of them agreed on a menu without much trouble, and it is cool, seeing the dishes she’s seen online come together in real life.

And as she watches him chop some herbs, she realizes exactly how much what she’s watching resembles what she’s seen online. Her jaw drops, and before she can think it through, she says, “Holy shit, you’re Grumio.”

He freezes. “What?”

There’s no going back, so she just has to plow forward. “I recognize your hands.”

“My hands?” he asks, incredulous.

She should have noticed before, honestly. Of course Bellamy has nice hands, he always has. She’s caught herself on more than one occasion watching the way he gestures when he talks, but it’s hard to really identify someone from their hands alone. It’s seeing the way they look in action, cooking, that’s so familiar, and somehow she’s sure. Bellamy’s list of dishes was very similar to the one she proposed. He was always a little shifty about the whole thing. It makes sense, for all it feels impossible. Grumio could be anyone, but somehow, he’s Bellamy.

“I was going to tell you,” he says, slumping.

“When?”

“When I figured out how. I didn’t think anyone I knew actually read it. O mentioned it once but just, you know, she saw a link.”

“So no one knows?”

“You know.”

“No one else.”

He shrugs, a little awkward. “I didn’t want my students to know, so it just seemed easier to not tell anyone.” He laughs, shaking his head. “Fuck, I can’t believe you recognized my hands. I didn’t think they were that special.”

“Maybe I’m just a big fan.”

“Are you? Do you comment or anything?”

Part of her wants to lie, but he easily could have denied his own identity, so it’s only fair. “Yeah, um. Sea Geez.”

He stares at her, and then starts laughing. “Holy shit. Seriously?”

“What?”

“You’re my favorite commenter.”

A warm glow of pride fills her chest. “Well, you’re my favorite Roman food blogger.”

“Thanks.” He turns his attention back to the chopping, deliberate. “This was, uh. The best way I could figure out to use it as a pickup. If I’d know you were Sea Geez I would have just asked you out, honestly.”

“Really?”

“You were definitely flirting with me.”

“You were definitely flirting back!”

He grins. “I was. So—did this work?”

“This?”

He gestures to his kitchen. “First date.”

“Does Octavia know it’s a first date?”

“Fuck, she always knows when I have a crush. It’s the world’s most annoying super power. She knows.”

“Then yeah,” she says. “Anything would have worked, honestly.”

“Awesome. Go check the meat, will you?”

“Romantic,” she teases, and he just raises one shoulder, smiles.

“I thought so, yeah.”

Comments on post First Anniversary Dinner for Poppaea

Helen of Troy, NYWow, that’s a really nice spread!! Poppaea is a very lucky woman. I hope she appreciates you ;)

GrumioYeah, don’t worry, I’m pretty sure she does.

Sea GeezWell, who wouldn’t?

#live-laugh-loaf

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