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casiia · 3 months

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༉‧₊˚. — simon 'GHOST' riley; cooties.

warnings .: x reader, dad simon, afab ! reader, soso much fluff, unedited.

.: masterlist.

imagine simon’s daughter coming home with tears just running down her face, you’re trailing in behind and trying your best to hide your laugh as you console her.

“it’s just a myth, dear.”

but that only makes her cry harder, because she’s 7 and doesn’t know what the fuck a myth is. who is she supposed to believe…her loving mother who raised her and has never lied to her a day in her life, or the girl she’d met just an hour ago on the playground.

“it’s true!” she gasps out, wiping her wet cheeks with her palms, dramatically dragging her hands down her face as another sob wracked her tiny body.

you could only snicker silently as you brushed away baby hairs that clung to her cheeks. frankly, you didn’t know what to say; you’d tried everything to help your daughter and ease her of this new world ending conflict.

simon’s on immediate alert, normally he’s welcomed home with kisses and hugs and bottomless babbles about pointless things. hearing his baby’s loud cry followed by her quick and urgent footsteps makes him panic and his mind instantly goes to the worst.

hurriedly, simon makes his way down the stairs nearly breaking his neck when he trips over a stray toy — but he manages to grab the banister before falling to his death and peaks into the living room.

you’re sitting on the couch with her cradled in your arms, a tender and gentle shush whispered off of your lips as you untangle knots in her hair. your attempts to calm her down don’t, she’s as stubborn as her father, if not more.

“what’s going on, sweet pea?” simon asks, treading carefully as he inches closer to you, his eyes clouded with a mix of worry and question.

before he can sit down, the girl in your arms shrieks so loud he can hear it ringing in his temple. wincing at the loud intrusion, simon watches as his daughter shoots from your arms all the way across the living room, her back pressed to the wall and eyes wide with what seems to be horror.

now simon’s afraid, is there something on his face? did he forget to shave? is he even simon?

you only snort behind your palm, furrowing your eyebrows and returning back to your playful yet serious expression. “go on, babygirl. tell dad what she said.”

his heart is hammering in his chest now, what did she say — who are you talking about?

and he doesn’t know if that scream altered him deaf but all he can see is her lips moving. the sound of your quiet giggles calms him though, and you have to ask her to say it again.

“she said boys have cootie!” she screams, looking horrified — looking at her dad as if he’d grown a third head and eaten all of her halloween candy.

simon begins to open his mouth to say something, something along the lines of “who fuckin’ told ya that.” although the more he thinks it over he’s compelled to play into the roll. he pauses for a moment, concentrated on weighing out the pros and cons.

on one hand, it breaks his heart to see his girl avoiding him like this. going to the edge of the earth just to distance herself from him. crying out because her world is shattered, her dad? having cooties? what nonsense.

on the other hand. simon’s been hearing about this ‘jack’ boy that she’s been in love with on the playground, he even proposed to her with a fucking stick. his daughter can do better than that. and hell, she’s too young to be dating, she doesn’t even know her alphabet!

so with some quick thinking a small smile paints his lips, he opens his arms and watches as she hesitantly takes a step forward. his heart leaps at that, she’s willing to catch a fake disease of cooties just for a daily hug from her father.

“boys do have cooties, but not me, see this?” he reaches inside of his shirt and pulls out the dog tag that hangs around his neck, he gives it a nice tug and smiles a bit. “it’s cootie-repellent.”

another step, hesitant but slowly the small girl is inching away from the wall and closer to the awaiting arms of her dad. “r-really?” she asks, a hiccup following her shaky breath as she calms down.

simon only nods, he’s grateful that your daughter isn’t one to question much. a hard believer in anything she hears, to this day she still believes that fairy’s live in the freezer. he’s not sure what story he would make up if she began questioning him, maybe something with fairies. they were always his go to.

“y’want it?” simon begins to take the necklace off, holding it out to her. shes just an arms reach away, but she’s curious.

“yes.” she mumbles, her heartbroken expression from moments ago turning into that beaming smile that warms simon’s chest. “i’ll give it to jack!”

simon stills. fuck. no way was he going to lose his girl this soon. “nuh uh.” he laughs, quickly tucking the chain back under his shirt and pulling his daughter into his chest.

you watch as he ruffles her hair, her muffled screams falling onto deaf ears as she squirms and punches her dad, begging for him to let go. simon only tightens his arms around the flailing girl, peppering kisses all over tear stained face, watching her once glossy eyes crinkle with joy at her dad’s affection.

thank god for cooties.

#[ ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ — 𝐒𝐈𝐀 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐒. ]#do 7 year olds know the alphabet #?!??!?!#silly lil thing i wrote at 5am #( 𝐒𝐈𝐌𝐎𝐍 𝐑𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐘 ᡣ𐭩 ྀིྀ )#simon riley x reader #simon riley #dad simon #cod #call of duty

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chisatowo · 2 years

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Man I've been in such a bad mood lately I don't wanna feel this bitter and spiteful abt everything but idk how to try and feel better since the root cause is smth I can't avoid hhhhhh

#rat rambles #rat vents #I was given a choice to avoid it a while back but my mom changed her mind so now I dont get a choice #which sucks because I rly rly dont wanna have to spend time around my cousins and other relatives on that side #ig I can only hope that the one stepcousin I actually like is still around but I probably wont get to see them much even still #theres technically another cousin I like but even hes become exhausting to be around #and then theres the shithead cousin and his shithead dad who I hate and am tired of pretending I dont hate #I kinda wanna shave my head before going just to spite them tbh but I wont #like my grandparents from that side's house is nice and stuff and theyre nice but like its all just become so. tainted to me.#but I cant rly avoid any of my cousins because itd take a god damn miracle for my mom to let me #which is bullshit tbh Im an adult now Im willing to visit my dad but I dont think I should be forced to do anything more #but like what else am I gonna do my mom has already payed for shit :/#I just dont wanna have to keep playing nice with ppl who dont think I exist yknow? even if they dont know Im trans #if I have to hear 'we can disagree while still respecting eachother's opinion' one more time Ill fucking snap #like bestie I dont respect your opinion thats the point #caculating the pros and cons of bringing my trans flag and just wearing it the whole time #pros: get to snap and be fueled by spite #cons: might get hate crimed :/#gonna double down on my threats of violence against transphobes this time if that bitch whines abt it Ill just deck him /j #Im so so tired of being nice I wanna go apeshit so so badly #I dont wanna debate ppl I just wanna be able to chill while on vacation without having to tollerate bigotry to do it

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lunarw0rks · 8 months

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Hey Rachel, how have you been? Can I request 141 + Alejandro + Konig with a f!reader who says things very directly and they don't have anything official, just little flirts here and there and one day she is just looking at them (you choose whether it's in front of other people or not) and they ask what's wrong and she says "I'm just looking at my future husband"? Thank you<333

˖⁺｡˚⋆˙✧⋆｡°⋆࿓ "Looking At My Future Husband" // 141 Headcanons (ale + k)

『♡』 masterlist ♡ rules ♡ ask box Warning(s): established relationship, fem!reader, sfw Word Count: 1k A/N: domestic!fluff is my fav genre, they deserve to be happy and settle down ୧(๑•̀ᗝ•́)૭

______ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐ ┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊ ⋆˚ ⁭ ⁭ ⁭ ⁭ ⁭ ⁭ ⁭ ⁭ ⁭ ✧. ┊ ⁭ ⁭ ⁭ ⁭ ⁭ ⁭ ⁭ ⁭ ⋆ ★ 「 ✦ ❝ 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘩𝘶𝘴𝘣𝘢𝘯𝘥 ❞ ✦ 」

⋮ ─── price ୨୧

let's be honest, it's rare for him to date without factoring in marriage early on. he had brought it up before, proposing it like some fantasy — though in his head he was entirely serious.

„we'll find a cabin, few miles out of the city. wedding in the field or the forest, flowers and everything. and all the critters you want, sweetheart.〞is what he said, mere months into the relationship. in the present, he no longer had to wonder if him popping the question would scare you off. you said it all for him, that you wanted him to be your future husband.

of course, you did it when he was half-awake, staring at his morning cup of coffee. ❝Then we'll get hitched. after I've shaved. don't want this mess in the pictures, do we?❞ his gruff morning voice drummed through the dim kitchen as john's fingers played with the whispies on his beard that needed trimmed.

he was humoring you {for now} — but he couldn't be any more serious.

︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ⭑

⋮ ─── simon ୨୧

he's clueless. downright mule-headed. oh, you like him? you mean you've lived with him, shared a bed, cooked him dinner, cuddled with him... and you like him? it's still a shock to simon, no matter the length of the relationship. how he ended up with someone so good to him.

❝husband? you should hate my guts for how I am some days, love.❞ whether the statement was true or not; you didn't hate him, otherwise you wouldn't have said it. he was worth more than he would ever give himself credit for.

he contemplates for a few moments, tapping his fingers against his thigh curiously, ❝alrigh' fine. I do like the sound of that, lovie. but i'm holding you to it, you know that, right?❞ it's only fair. you wouldn't let him live it down if he said something like that. perhaps your self-will is what made you two work so well.

︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ⭑

⋮ ─── soap ୨୧

you said it so casually as if you weren't just staring holes into him for several seconds. then, when he asked why you were staring so long; you turned your back, putting away the remainder of the dinner you just shared.

soap felt his face heat up instantly but concealed it with a smug smirk. ❝future husband, eh? suppose I'm off the hook for droppin' to my knee, then.❞ he questions playfully, slithering an arm around your shoulders. he thought little about the future ahead of him — which was both a flaw and a gift of his. but now that you had mentioned it, even as a jab, he hadn't ever wanted anything more for his future.

his breath tickles your ear as he leans close, infatuated by your firm, unyielding expression. the one you always kept, even in the midst of cheeky banter with him. ❝what can I say? I love me a woman who takes charge...❞

︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ⭑

⋮ ─── gaz ୨୧

kyle always wanted to be one hundred percent sure of his wants and desires. to think them through, to weigh pros and cons. even— no, especially concerning you. marriage was one he hadn't figured out yet, but it had nothing to do with your side of things. could he be a good husband? was he cut out for it? would it end in divorce, just like his parents?

he could only stew for so long, though. and you did the hardest part for him; bringing up the subject. gaz smiles and leans in for a kiss, hooking his arms around your waist. ❝that's my job, love. you should know better.❞

he kept it lowkey — one of his many talents.

but his mind wasn't buzzing, or swamped with hypotheticals about you two as a match. no, he had made up his mind when you said that. he now knew he wanted to marry you, no more existential crisis necessary. ❝we wouldn't do so bad, would we?❞ he asks rhetorically, his tone becoming more playful as he gives your jawline a gentle bite — purely to shatter your stone expression.

︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ⭑

⋮ ─── alejandro ୨୧

he's observant; annoyingly observant. he knew you weren't upset when you were staring into his soul. you wanted to say something to him, a potentially serious expression at that. ❝you're staring at me, querida. use your words.❞ he sets his glass down on the table, then the report in his hands next.

when you said it, you had successfully stroked his ego. as well as made his mind buzz with the wedding he had already mentally pictured a hundred times.

alejandro snickered to himself quietly, eyes roaming you. ❝you would look divine in a wedding dress, amor.❞ then his mind jumped to his family. his sisters, his mother, and any of his other crazy relatives that he dreaded introducing you to when the day came. he loved them to pieces, but his family could be... a handful.

❝ten cuidado con lo que deseas...❞ he mutters to himself, already picturing that overwhelmed look on your face when surrounded by all of them.

︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ⭑

⋮ ─── könig ୨୧

your unflinching stare had him on the edge of his seat. was there a special date he'd forgotten? had he said something to upset you? but, you wouldn't stay silent for this long if you were genuinely peeved. ❝what is it, schatz?❞

and then, you said it.

he could physically feel the tightness in his chest uncoil, the bounce of his leg ceasing just a bit. sure, he could be forward, be direct. but concerning you — his nerves always gnawed at him more aggressively than in the midst of warfare.

❝it would be an honor. just say the words, and we will.❞ he truly would wait if he had to. days, weeks, months; however long it would take you to make him your husband in the present.

‧˚₊•┈┈┈┈୨୧┈┈┈┈•‧₊˚⊹ divider cred. - cafekitsune

translate; ten cuidado con lo que deseas = be careful what you wish for.

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captainmalewriter · 8 months

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College Janitor

Alright, I'll be the first to admit that working as a janitor fucking sucks. Nobody has ever said "Wow! I wanna clean up other people's shit for a living!" and for good reason too. It's disgusting and more often than not it's completely thankless job. This shit fucking sucks, pun not intended.

So why did the hell did I willing decide to become a janitor when I hate it so much? Well, let me tell you. Even though there's a lot of cons to the job, there is one pro that singlehandedly makes it all worth it. I didn't just become a janitor at some random place, no, I became one at a college residence hall. This place is just teeming with young, horny bodies everywhere! And since college students are always coming and going every year, my catalog of bodies just keeps on growing! This place is perfect for a body hopper like me, especially since nobody ever suspects the nameless janitor...

Take my most recent body for example. This clueless freshman had no idea he would get possessed when he first moved into the dorms!

I just love the way a fresh body feels after I possess them! My personal favorites are all the skinny guys with no meat or hair on their bones. It's always so much fun seeing my beer belly of a gut squeeze into them as I possess and take over their bodies for myself. They get all bloated and fat while I squeeze my spiritual form down their throats. It always take me a couple of minutes to slither down into their bodies, but the effort is always worth it. The sound of them grunting and gagging while getting filled up by my essence is always so hot!

Their bodies inflate to the max and they stumble around due to all the extra weight they just took on with my soul. Then they get all surprised when their hands start moving on their own. They don't have a clue that it's actually me controlling them from the inside! I love forcing them to moan as I start exploring my new body, slowly but surely taking over control while I rub myself down. Then, once the possession is complete and I get total control, my new vessel adjusts itself to welcome me in as its new host. My new skin snaps into place like an elastic band as all the extra body weight disappears like it never existed. Their body is all mine now, and I just can't help but smile at a job well done.

I wonder how it feels to be skinny and to have a hairy, heavy bear like me possess my body. I bet it feels good to swallow up my long, curly beard as I force myself in. It must feel pretty warm to absorb a beefy, mature man like me. Like a bear hug, only on a much deeper level. Not that I would ever know, I'm the possessor, not the possessee. Just the way I like it! I just really can't believe this twink keeps shaving all this beautiful body hair! No razor is gonna touch this body while I'm in charge, let's see if he can grow a majestic beard and a pelt of chest hair like mine. I can tell this ass is already broken in. What a shame, this long dick isn't getting action. That's gonna change too, there's plenty of ass to fuck in college!

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to enjoy my first month of college... Hope the new, temporary janitor knows how to get cum off the shower tiles!

#male possession #male body possession #male takeover #male body theft #caption

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canyourfavesurvivecastledracula · 23 days

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I'd love a redo or a poll for Light Yagami, given some information

Pros: - evil mastermind. very smart - If he can write someone's name and knows what their face looks like, they die. He can also control their actions to a limited extent leading up to the death, but can only make them do things they would normally have some reason to do. It may not work on undead. - If he's really desperate, he can give up half his remaining lifespan to be able to see people's names just by looking at them - He's reasonably athletic, and could climb a wall Cons: - delicious mmmmmmm tasty

You know that's entirely fair. Since my last attempt I have learned several important things about this character, most critically, Light is the one who kills people with the Death Note, he's not L, and he's not God either.

@lukewarmglassofsuudsu writes:

And @lucyshiningstar writes:

It sounds to me like Dracula and Light Yagami might have, uhhhhhh, incompatible personality types. I am getting the impression that Light wants to play 4D chess against a worthy opponent but Dracula keeps eating the pieces. There's no way this guy is accepting the old lady's crucifix if he already thinks he's God and he also has a magic book he can murder people with. Now here's a question - does he believe himself to be God to a sufficient extent that he assumes he will be physically repulsive to vampires? You say he's smart - is he smarter than he is arrogan, or the other way around?

The notion that he may want to become a vampire is fascinating. Maybe he thinks that if he's immortal the "give up half your life to learn the name" has no cost because half of infinity is still infinity. Do we think he's right about that?

Does he know what vampires are? If he clocks Dracula as a killer, he might try to kill him with the Death Note... but that doesn't prove itself till May 16th, and if he cuts himself shaving he's dead May 8th. Is he willing to kill people who aren't serial killers in self defense?

Is Dracula willing to reveal his own name? He doesn't to Jonathan Harker. Nor do the Girlies.

...........is Light Yagami just anime Rodya Raskolnikov, but with a magic book?

I still think I want to bring this to a poll because the possibilities fascinate me and I love to see you guys theorize

#light yagami #death note #anime and manga #crooks #sort of #academics #also sort of

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gin-juice-tonic · 3 months

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cons to shaving mustache: mustache is gone

pros to shaving mustache: fabric feels very soft on my face

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yaut-jaknowit · 4 months

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Reader introducing Woftik to the concept of ooman winter holidays, maybe some gift giving. Tooth rotting fluff

The Holidays

Pairing: Woftik (male Yautja) x GN!reader

Word Count: 2744

Summary: In the vast winter lands of Yautja Prime, Woftik and his mate get to learn about ooman holidays. Woftik doesn't understand it but with the help of his ooman mate, he comes to learn and participate in it. If it means keeping you happy, he's up for it.

Author Note: Merry Christmas and/or happy holidays everyone! Hope everyone has a great end of the year and is preparing for the next. Here's your present! If you guys want a second part, let me know!

Masterlist

Ao3

The Yautja calendar and yours were different. Very different. After your time on Yautja Prime, the days have blended together far too much to remember when was when back home. Truly, it didn’t matter. You’ve made your choice to stick it out on Woftik’s planet. There was nothing to change your mind… besides the damned blizzards that forcefully board up the huts in your small village. The clan, Nacht Klinge, gets wiped off of the map for the time being.

During those months where little light would shine on the lands, casting them in darkness, you considered those to be the winter months. Similar to your own planet. It was the only way to make sense of the changing scenes.

For a fact, you knew the days were longer. On your first week, let alone day on the planet, you knew this immediately. At first, you believed it to be jet lag, or whatever you would consider traveling from planet to planet was. Yet, you later learned they have an extra five hours to their day.

Yautja’s calendars were something you didn’t dare mess with. Confusing with all the changes that happen. The months were weird. The days long, The weeks were six days compared to seven. You just went along with it. They weren’t anything you needed to fret over. If a day of importance came up, Woftik would remind you or let you know. He grew up with said calendar. It’s best to let him handle the confusion than the headache it would surely give you.

When the winter months rolled over the Nacht Klinge clan, an idea came to mind. The winter holidays. Presents; lights; gifts; family; joy. All of it. Your face soured. With the pros of living under your mate’s house, came cons as well. No people to celebrate with. Humans, at least. The Yautjas aren’t ones to have extreme holidays. Though in a sense, they had religion. Holidays usually came from religion.

Now, what could you even get Woftik as a present? He’s the caretaker and hunter. You do outside every once awhile, under the careful watch of those black eyes of his. The lands may look desolate but monsters, predators stalk their prey under the snow. The opposite of a fox or snow owl. Woftik ensured you understood, though not feared, the dangers that lurk beyond the protection of his home.

And you did. As a human though, you required the sun. Through your time in your new home, the color of your skin has lightened over time. Just enough to be noticeable.

Some time ago, you remember coming down with a terrible illness that could even affect a Yautja. Woftik freaked out. Yautja’s rarely got sick. So when they do, it’s serious. He sprinted the whole way to get you to the doctor of the village. Though younger than Woftik by a couple hundred years, she laughed at him before explaining how weak ‘ooman’ systems are. Poor man looked like he had a couple of years shaved off.

Deep in thought, you smiled subconsciously, eyes glazed over. Your head shook side to side to clear any memories still lingering. Times like that bulldoze any doubts over. Like weeds, they do return. But, hey, you’re human. Nothing can change the way you or your species thought.

Hard keratin gently pressed to the top of your head. Jolted from your thoughts, your head whipped up to find the dark gaze of your mate peering over the edge of the couch at you. “Woftik!” you spoke his name in surprise before lifting yourself to your knees and spinning around to face the off-white Yautja.

Small bits of snow clung to his clothing on his shoulders. Nothing out of ordinary. The low light of the twenty-nine hour days didn’t require him to use the googles designed to protect his eyes from the harsh sun or the reflective snow.

The chief of his clan dipped his head in greetings. You instantly wrapped your arms around the large male’s waist, not able to touch your hands together behind him. A size and heaviness needed in these harsher climates.

His body stayed soft in your hold, arms reaching to rub between your shoulder blades. Then, you let your arms fall to the couch, orbs still looking up at him. Woftik chuffed then leaned down to place another closed mandible kiss on the top of your head. “What has my little minx been up to?” he rumbled and walked around the short couch.

The lumbering giant scooped you from the seat, sat down himself, and let you rest on the new open spot. Muscular arms stayed wrapped around your smaller frame. A kind smile broke across your face, unable to glance away from those dark, light-consuming eyes of his. “Nothing much.”

Former thoughts flashed in your mind. A bittersweet feeling swelling behind your breastbone. Woftik was your new family.

A sharp, light grey claw tapped the tip of your nose and brought you from your mind. Eyes once glazed over peered back into the dark orbs of Woftik’s. “What is on your mind, mate?” his deep voice vibrated through his chest and into your side.

“Well…” you trailed off for a moment to think about how to explain this. From your limited knowledge, Yautjas have holidays but nothing like how human do or even celebrate. You chewed at the inside of your lip for a second before a light bulb shined above your head. “Okay, so humans have holidays. Presents, gatherings, family drama, the whole nine yards. Chaos in a pot. Well, I was wondering if we could maybe celebrate?”

There was an expression of indifference on his older features. The darkness of his eyes didn’t allow many of emotions to reflect in them. This left you to ponder what was rolling around in his massive head.

“Of course, if you don’t want to, I won’t make you. I… I just miss those things from my home, you know?” A nervous look presented itself as my expression. Not one born of fear, but from the known if Woftik would do this with you.

The arms around you unwrapped themselves to rest on the back of the couch. He looked like peace itself when he presented himself like this. “What does this holiday or holiday entail?”

Instantly, you perked up with a wide smile spilting your lips. “Really?!” Amusement flash through his eyes. “Yes! Okay, so I celebrate a day called Christmas. It’s really big in the states. It’s about a man named santa who delievers presents to children who’ve been good. The bad kids get coal.”

Off-white brows furrowed the longer you talked. “Wait, are you saying a random male breaks into your dwelling and gives you something?” he questioned in disbelief. How could anyone be okay with that?! He rarely let anyone over to his private hut. You are here, protected from the dangers of his world. To alone another of species to enter could endanger your life. A risk he wasn’t willing to take.

The laugh in return didn’t ease the tension in his body. “No, silly! It’s a sham. Santa doesn’t exist. It’s a story to tell to kids so they be good or else they won’t get any toys as a reward,” you explained and smack his chest with the back of your hand. It hurt you more than him.

Woftik hummed. “Strange. Does it work?” From the little experience he had with the oomans home planet, he truly didn’t know if it worked. His species use a more physical, firmer approach to unruly offspring. He’s had his fair share of smacks when he was a child. He learned from his mother not to do that the safer way then figuring it out if it stole his life.

You reached behind your neck to scratch an nonextant itch. “Eh, from the last year I was back on earth, the new generation was growing worse with their attitude and disrespect. Thankfully, I won’t have to worry about that being here and with you.”

By Paya’s grace, he loved the way you looked up at him, such a compassionate look. The day you died, he would wish to keep your eyes for the rest of his life. He knew it wouldn’t be the same, a fact that would forever sit heavy in his chest.

“So, what do you say? Wanna have a Christmas with me this year?” you asked with hope sparkling in your pupils. Woftik was a harden chief, a stern hand when it came to ensuring his clan survived every harsh month in these barren lands. When it came to you, his sweet, little ooman, he could never say no. Not when you look at him like that. Plus, the holiday sounded fun.

A grunt sounded from his deep barrel chest. “Why not.” You squealed and hugged the big male again, hands unable to touch each other.

“Thank you! Thank you!” you chanted then stood up on the couch. The added height was just enough to reach his face. Your lips touched at one of his lower mandibles in a mock kiss. The best the two of you could do while he had no lips to return he affection.

From the happiness apparent on your alien face, Woftik internally smiled at the sight. It was the right choice to do this with you. He rubbed a brow against your temple in affection. “Of course, my mate.” Woftik pulled back enough to look you in eye, a scaly brow raised in question. “When shall this ‘Christmas’ occur?”

Your lips pursed in thought. First off, you’ll need to go out and gather something for him as a present. That would require possibly sneaking past him and heading into town. With the weather getting worse during this months, venturing out would be dangerous. Especially for a human like you without your protector of a Yautja. The preparation and whatnot would take you some time to plan.

Since the winter was only about one-third over, there was plenty of time to work. “Okay, let’s do it in three weeks,” you offered.

Yes, the weeks are a day shorter, but the days are longer. They weren’t the same back on home but relatively close enough that it could work.

“Alright, three weeks from today shall be our ‘Christmas’,” Woftik agreed.

Another idea came to mind. “Oh! And I want to other things too. Like, wearing matching PJs and hot cocoa.” Your face was spilt wide with a grinning smile that would take a god’s force to remove. Not that Woftik would even dare to. Knowing that showing your teeth for oomans was a sign of happiness now, he would kill to see you like this all the time. His mate deserved to be ecstatic.

The thought of what would come from this new chapter in his life had him sighing on the outside. His normal, grumpy looking self on display. What had he gotten himself into now?

“You won’t regret it. I promise, Wof!” you reassured the male. Your soft, supple hands cupped his scaly outer jaw. Instantly, Woftik melted into this new hold on him, eyes hooding over. Despite his mind slowing, he was planning out how to execute this new holiday with you.

Hot cocoa? He’ll have to look it up but it must be a sweet drink. This far north from the warmth of the sun, little to planet life grew. This would require him to go into the bustling city towards the equator to get what you wanted. Maybe he would take you with him. Carefully. Not all clans are accepting of oomans. Almost all still saw them for the weak species they are, some of those just leave them alone as whole. A small amount go out of their way to kill any that stray away from the protection of either mate or clan. Woftik would have to keep you close and practically on a leash to ensure you don’t fall victim to those said clans.

This would be good though. Woftik does spend plenty of time with you but mostly here, in his private dwelling, protected and safe. The male would never think about taking you out for a hunt, risking unnecessary injury when he could easily provide for the two of you. To take you from here, into the heart of Yautja Prime… he saw it as a good thing. Exploration, change.

Internally, he nodded. Woftik would plan this as a day trip and use his ship to head to the equator to find the necessary items.

“I do have a plan, little ooman.” You tilted your head in silent question. “I shall take you with me to Eourov. From there, I will gather supplies for this ‘Christmas’ and we can celebrate together.”

Your eyes widened. Woftik has spoken some about the biggest city on Yautja Prime: Eourov. The fact he was willing to take you from his clan’s territory was surprising. But to the largest city?

As human, the natural feeling of fear crawled up your back like the legs of a spider. But you pushed that down and looked at him fearlessly. “When do we leave?” You brought forth the courage and excitement of exploring a new plan to your heart. Not only were you having Christmas with the person you loved, but he was taking you to somewhere new!

“I will have to bring up Totolak up to speed about this.” Totolak was Woftik’s second in command. “This will be a day trip but we will return at the end of the day cycle back here. So, he will need to cover for the day while I’m gone with you. We shall plan for two days.” Those dark brown, on the verge of black, eyes pierced through yours.

“Alrighty! I can’t wait,” you squealed and rewrapped your around him. This time, ensnaring his neck tightly. Woftik gently returned the act with just one arm around your torso. His free hand resting on your hip, his thumb mindlessly rubbing over your comfortable t-shirt.

“Is my mate happy?” he questioned. The first thought to come to mind was how ridiculous of a question that was!

“Of course I am! I get to spend more time with you. My favorite thing is to spend time with you. Even if it’s just lounging around with nothing to do,” you stated firmly towards the end. You prayed he wasn’t having doubts about your feelings towards him. You simply brushed off that stupid idea and kept grinning up at him.

The off-white Yautja saw devotion shining back in those pools of emotions. His heart squeezed at the sight. The hand on your hip scaled up your body to cup your jaw and tilted your head up, exposing your throat to him. An action only mates and deeply trusted ones would offer to one another. His pink tongue flickered out for a fleeting moment. “But you must stay close to me. At all times. You have to be glued at my side the whole time we are out,” Woftik demanded, voice growing lower to show his seriousness.

His hand tightened on your jaw. You took his words straight to your heart. Woftik wants to protect you from all harm as his mate. “I will,” you promised Woftik, only knowing the hint of dangers he spoke in fleeting talks before. All you knew was some Yautja hated your species and won’t hesitate to kill you. Thankfully, you have your heart placed in Woftik’s hands. He would keep you safe from danger.

Woftik purred and rubbed his brow once more to your temple. “Tomorrow, I will alert Totolak to our adventure. For now, I shall enjoy my time with my mate.”

The thick arm wrapped around your torso tightened. You were promptly lifted off of the couch and tossed onto the shoulder of Woftik. Said Yautja kept his limb secure around you and began his march to your shared room.

Your laugh echoed off of the walls of your home. “Woftik!” you tried to scold him through the laughter bubbling in your chest but was unsuccessful.

You soon found yourself trapped underneath Woftik’s lumbering frame as he buried his face into the crook of your neck. Both of his arms were locked around you. No chance of escape, not that you want ed to in the first place. This is where you belonged. Forever.

#yautja #predator #yautja x you #yautja x reader #predator x reader #yautja x human #predator x you #predator x human #x reader #Woftik

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kindaasrikal · 6 months

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You know how it’s rlly obvious what Morro’s favourite colour is? Imagine he actually hated it.

Like if you asked him the pros and cons of being the green ninja, he’d list off the fact that you’re destined for greatness, you’re strong, you’re badass, you’re a hero, and so on.

And then when he starts with the cons its just “its green.”

Like he just despises the colour and he doesn’t even know why but it ended up being everywhere in his life.

Yknow the green streak in his hair? Mf didn’t dye it on purpose it grew out of his scalp in the middle of the night. He’s tried dyeing it back to black/brown, he tried cutting it off, hes tried SHAVING it off. It just grows back. He’s just stuck with a specific section of his hair growing green now.

When he died? This man was raging about the fact that he was now green and transparent. His skin, his clothes, his hair, his face. All of it, was just an ugly shade of green.

And when he saw the green gi for the first time? He swore on his life that he would dye it pink, as long as it wasn’t green.

He hates green more then he hates Lloyd. Yet, green is his signature colour.

#morro ninjago #lego emo #lloyd ninjago #zane julien #ninjago morro #morro wu #morrowind #lego ninjago #pink ninja #green #green ninja #ew green #he just really hates green #but everyone thinks he’s obsessed with it #so now his whole life and afterlife is just green

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purplehanfu · 5 months

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Rating the Husbandos: The Story of Kunning Palace

notes: Spoilers! You really have your pick of men in this drama- but are any of them husband material?

Thoughtfully considered ratings behind the cut:

Xie Wei

A mysterious, tragic past is not a personality.

pros: Sexy as he looms over you in his fur collared capes. Exhibits very progressive thinking on women's issues. Which is strange considering all of his cons (see below).

cons: Explosive temper; violent; acts like he owns you; keeps trying to choke you (and not in a sexy consensual way); expects you to be grateful when he doesn't kill you in service to his grand revenge plan. Tough guy demeanor which he can only back up with the judicious application of his lackeys. Backstory so complicated you kind of lose interest. Looks like he has conjunctivitis a lot of the time.

hobbies: Making qins and tracking the wood shavings all over the house. Being afraid of snow except when the plot requires him not to be.

sexxin: Endless stamina and exquisite anatomy. Too bad he has no idea what he's doing. Cries after sex and gets mad when you laugh about it (why would you do that you monster).

Grade: C-

Zhang Zhe

Sometimes being hot is enough.

pros: HANDSOME

cons: His devotion to truth and justice will probably get him killed in the course of some courtly intrigues but the real tragedy is that he will never lie to spare your feelings. He will, however, compare your cooking unfavorably to his mother's.

hobbies: Restoring antiques; doing his own laundry

sexxin: Pathetic but you have to pretend it's great or he will become obsessed with improvement. At least the view is nice.

Grade: C

Yan Lin

A cheerful sweet ray of murderous sunshine.

pros: Smart, handsome, thoughtful, loyal, excellent martial arts, terrifying military skillset. You're his one and only, his ride-or-die, his day one.

cons: Related to Xie Wei

hobbies: Swordplay (see below)

sexxin: Complete freak in the sheets. Hope you have a strong bed and a soundproof bedroom, you're going to need both.

Grade: A+

Yan Lin's Dad

Reporting for duty.

pros: Has his own army but doesn't make a big thing about it (the Emperor and Xue family do, however).

cons: Frequently has the intensity dialed up to 11 when the situation clearly calls for a 6.

hobbies: Carving figurines for his 3-D map sandbox thing

sexxin: As expected of a military man he is good at taking orders and completing missions. His courage tongue should be awarded for its service to the nation you

grade: B+

Emperor

Heaven must have a sense of humor because it mandated this guy.

pros: Easily seduced by you.

cons: Easily seduced by people other than you. Married. Paranoid. Sickly but that might just be poison (if so add "unable to poison him" to the con list).

hobbies: Marveling at how good he is at seducing people.

sexxin: His game is as weak as his constitution.

grade: a solid F unless you want to murder your way to Empress, then he's a D

Fake Xie Wei

Ain't nothing like the real thing.

pros: social butterfly at parties, everyone knows him, can give you a wild night out on the town even if it's Tuesday and you're in some backwater village.

cons: is an actual con artist

hobbies: Collecting STDs

sexxin: so good you might be tempted to forgive him for his wandering eye. Don't. Just enjoy him if you must and move on.

Grade: D-

Gu Chun Fang

Hear me out.

You've been married more than 40 years. When your parents first arranged your marriage he snuck into your rooms that night to make sure you were ok with it. You fell in love at first sight. You never had children despite years of trying but he has never so much as looked at another woman. You come from a huge family and he has many young subordinates so your mansion is always very lively. Your New Year's parties are the stuff of legend.

pros: In all his years as an official he has never once made you get up early to help him get ready for court sessions.

cons: Would have no clothes if you did not buy them for him, would never eat if you did not arrange his meals, would fall asleep at his desk if you did not force him to come to bed.

hobbies: Collecting weird ugly giant rocks which he deposits in the various courtyard gardens of your mansion. Pretending to fish but really just taking a nap.

sexxin: After all these years you can still make him blush with a whispered invitation. Adorable.

Grade: A+ but he's not available and never will be

Dao Qin

It's always the quiet ones.

pros: Loyal; physique that was created as though by the gods themselves; surprisingly high EQ

cons: Kinda sad life made this guy an NPC when he has such strong main character energy.

hobbies: designing and crafting hidden weapons and/or cat toys

sexxin: You have seen the top of the mountain, and it is good.

Grade: B+

Master list of all show recaps etc.

#the story of kunning palace #zhang ling he #zhou jun wei #wang xingyue #this may become a regular feature #rating the husbandos

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