As much as I love the Director's Cut for Little Shop I find it incredibly endearing that test audiences wanted so badly for the underdog protags to come out on top that an alternate happier ending had to be made for public release. I think that's indicative of actual real human nature of wanting others to be cared for and happy rather than that flimsy crab-in-a-bucket metaphor or whatever.
What fictional lawyer would you choose to represent you in a court of law?
For this poll assume: they’re acting as a criminal defense attorney, they’re licensed to work in your state and/or country, the others you don’t choose will be working for the prosecution, and you didn’t do it.
Bonus question: Would your answer change if you did do it?
(If you include your reasoning in the tags you get a gold star and a candy of your choice)
I fucking love loser characters. Give me your lamest guy. I want to pick him up and throw him in the best way possible. Bonus points if it’s a grown ass man.