#Mafia Target | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

raxacoricofallapatorius10 · 24 days

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No but imagine how absolutely FUCKING FUNNY it'll be if mafia!dazai and chuuya had an undercover mission in a school right? And their education level isnt up to date yes? So like they're okay in practical subjects but absolutely clueless in any type of science where theory is required and both of them thought they'd be kinda okay at math since dazai is SMART smart and chuuya is somewhere there beside him at the intelligence level

But then suddenly they have mathematics more than your usual add, minus, multiply, divide and both of them are like ??????

Because why the FUCK do u need to learn some weird trigonometric table??? And proving a triangle is a triangle???? And ratios ???

Both of them are the last students in class but they're like mehh because they dont give a shit like that but their math teacher is absolutely LOSING IT because 2 boys who should have ample knowledge about these topics at this class dont have a SINGLE clue and he wants to fix this since SOMEONE has to and its unideal for them to lag behind like that

Chuuya and dazai absolutely fuck up the guy's schedules for everything because hey they might as well have some entertainment while they're at it right? And the teacher does the most awsome tricks whenever he's mad (counting to ten and holding in his anger while chuuya is reciting his MULTIPLICATION TABLES WRONG) (staring at dazai with a look of absolute HORROR when dazai just recites suicide drugs from the top of his head after not being able to understand angles)

Bonus: at the end of the mission both of them kind of disappear and the teacher gets super fucking concerned because their contacts, guardians, everything is just missing and he thinks oh god maybe the taller kid killed himself or maybe the shorter one got himself wind up somewhere he shouldnt be because he talks too much

And to figure where the students are because NO ONE is doing anything, he ends up at the ADA

#bungou stray dogs #bungou gay dogs #bsd #bsd dazai #bsd chuuya #yes the teacher is kunikida #he sees dazai at the agency years later #and just absolutely beats the shit out of him #because he can now #he isnt stopped by petty school rules #and dazai is STILL a pain in the ass #kunikida asks dazai where he disappeared #and dazai said he got kidnapped and trafficked because he panicked #kunikida asks him what happened to his short friend #and dazai says he died speeding his bike because he panicked #when kunikida finds out both of them are in the mafia #he asks dazai who was the target #it was him #because of his ability #the mafia wanted to remove him #just in case #but chuuya and dazai didnt do anything #because hey they're teacher kind of nice #in a temper issues kind of way #and chuuya likes that he can talk shit about dazai #cue kunikida meets chuuya for the first time #and instantly starts reprimanding him for his fashion #his speech #his swearing #“did you finally learn your multiplication tables?” “pls stfu”

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skeletorswaifu · 4 months

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WOLFSTAR AU.

Summary- Remus Lupin is a Mafia hit man who wants out. His last job is to eliminate the Black family heir.

(word count unknown)

(very short though, promise!)

~~~~~~🐺~~~~~~⭐~~~~~~

Remus works for the notorious Mafia boss Grayback. He wants out, but to do so he needs to finish one last job.

Kill the Heir to a rival family, The Blacks.

He shows up to the Gala looking for a clean cut man trying to prove himself to his family. Someone sophisticated, someone who will have his own goons protecting him.

He hears the voice of a nearby man, lanky and tall, covered in tattoos, seemingly uncomfortable in the suit he was wearing.

"of course Mr. Black."

"Thank you Crouch, be quick."

Remus eyed the man at the table in front of him. He's younger than Remus assumed he would be. Short curls falling into his cold observing eyes, framing his sharp features. He looked exactly like the son of someone dangerous, he had the glint of venom in his stare. At first glance he wasn't intimidating, beautiful and pretentious, but not intimidating. A predator all the same though.

He had one man sitting next to him, not a threat, some old codger, probably a family friend he was forced to suck up to. Another man standing behind him leaning against a pillar, casually drinking a glass of wine and scanning the room.

Remus would have to wait for an opening, perhaps when Black went to the bathroom....otherwise he'd have to find a way to distract or...take care of the guards discreetly.

A silver, slinky dress sunk into the chair next to Remus.

"Ugh, he looks so snooty." The person heaved a long pointed breath, blowing hair from their face. The long black strand flitted hopelessly into the air and back down in the exact same spot.

Remus looked at him wide eyed and confused. "Excuse me?" Honestly, Remus couldn't care less who this person was. He would rather take them behind a pillar and shove his tongue in their mouth. Remus noticed one strap of the dress was slightly off shoulder, draped over a slender collar bone, he felt his mouth water. His fingers twitched with the desire to reach over and fix it.

The angel nodded towards the Black Heir.

"him," He attempted to smooth the dress, crossing his long legs. "He looks exactly like his father when he makes that face," A server passed by offering champagne, he took one gratefully. Remus watched as he slowly sipped the bubbly drink still eyeing the heir. He scoffed and turned his eyes to Remus.

Whoever he was he knew the Black family. Maybe he could use this to his advantage, but it was hard to think of much when two piercing eyes of an angel were sizing you up.

"You're drooling." He took another sip of champagne. An amused smile quirked the corner of his dark wine stained mouth. Remus wasn't supposed to drink on the job but...god, did he want just a taste of those lips.

Remus smiled back, leaning back in his chair attempting to act unbothered. The eyes slowly raked Remus' body, languid and thorough.

"Out of mind numbing boredom, naturally." He drawled, rolling his eyes playfully. He could flirt and still keep an eye on the target. Multitask, he was a damn hit man, if he couldn't do that he should have died a long time ago.

"hmmm," the stranger nodded in agreement. "What are you doing here?" He asked curiously. "You don't...fit. it's distracting." The eyes squinted trying to detect suspicious ticks.

Remus glanced at the table with the heir. He was talking to the guy behind him. He was talking quickly and glaring at Remus' table guest. Something was wrong. Was he found out? How would that even be possible? This stranger, this impossibly gorgeous stranger, were they a target of the Black Family?

Remus cleared his throat. "Work thing." He knew he sounded rude but then again he was busy trying to figure out different scenarios in which he could quickly kill the Black Heir and possibly save the gorgeous man in front of him if needed....and he was also slightly offended.

"Me? You're the brightest star in this place," Remus scoffed waving a hand at the slinky silver dress and black heels. "The minute you sat down I was in trouble." He quirked an eyebrow.

"I've been known to be....troublesome." A wide smile broke across his face.

Remus was tempted to say "fuck it" and offer him a good time. He could finish killing the Black Heir later, make up some excuse about too many people.

"Ahem," The guard was no longer speaking to the Black Heir but standing just behind the stranger. Remus tensed. He didn't even care what this guy had done to upset the Blacks or that there were upwards of two hundred people at the gala, If anyone tried putting a finger on him, Remus would fucking kill them all.

He shivered at the thought. He didn't even know this man but something in his gut told him he was important.

"Yeah yeah," he tried shooing the guard away.

The man sighed and cleared his throat again, louder this time.

"For Christ's sake Rosier, what does he want now?" He flung around, eyes shooting darts.

"He wants and I quote," The guard, Rosier, folded his arms in front of him smirking. "Stop flirting and do your job."

He scowled at Rosier, flipped the Black Heir off, and smiled. "Fine, but I'm finishing my conversation." He leaned in, placing a hand on Remus knee, with the other he beckoned him closer.

He felt the electricity stutter through his body. Remus leaned forward

He had been in dangerous situations before. He had been shot at, stabbed, and chased by the police and criminals (if there was a difference), but his heart had never beat faster.

"I hate this place. I hate these people. I have to go mingle now but I wanted you to know you don't fit, that's a good thing. A very good thing," He tilted his head up and slightly away, hot breath in Remus' ear. He shuddered "I like you, what's your name?"

Remus almost purred at the heat in his ear. He took a breath to steady himself.

"Remus."

The eyes found his again.

"I'm Sirius."

Remus knew confusion flashed behind his eyes and this close there was no doubt he saw it.

"That's my name, honest." He smiled again.

Remus could stare into those eyes forever. He would jump into the storm of them and tread the wild waves until he drowned.

"Ay, you found him!"

Remus startled out of his trance. Both guards were staring right at them. Rosier and the tattooed one.

"I can't have one minute can I?" Sirius was still staring at Remus but the question was aimed at the guards.

"Nope, sorry boss. Reg is getting pretty anxious. You haven't talked to a single buyer all night."

Boss? Why were the guards who worked for the Black Heir calling Sirius boss?

"I found a pretty shiny thing," Sirius stood up rolling his neck. "I'm easily distracted, you know that Crouch." Sirius took a deep breath and turned back to Remus.

"sorry, I have to go, but I will absolutely be finding you later....if you're still here."

But if there was one thing he knew about himself, it was that he would rather die than not be a gentleman. So, he stood and bent slightly at the waist. Remus took Sirius' hand in his and kissed the smooth skin of the knuckles.

If they were calling him boss then he was in charge somehow. Perhaps Orion Black didn't trust his son to go out alone and Sirius was watching over him. Maybe he was in charge of security. Maybe that's why the three of them were so casual, they worked together.

Which was a god damn shame because it meant that at some point he might have to incapacitate or even, God forbid, kill Sirius.

The thought made him ill.

"I'll be waiting," Remus did purr this time but only to let Sirius know that when he did find him again Remus was not letting him go.

Sirius flushed red, wide eyes staring at Remus' lips.

They must have been taking too long because now another person had appeared.

"Sirius," he hissed the name like a snake. "Father wanted you to mingle. Get to know people for when-"

Regulus pursed his lips and nodded in Remus' general direction. "Hello."

"Remus, my little brother Regulus," Sirius swiveled to face his brother. "Reg, this is my new best friend, Remus."

Holy shit. Remus prayed to every god he could think of to let him see Sirius again. Maybe even in a dark secluded room with a soft bed or a fucking couch, a futon, whatever, you know what? It didn't matter, he'd take a cold hard floor if it meant he could pin Sirius beneath him. Explore every divot and curve of his body until he had claimed every inch of land with his hands and conquered every moan with his lips...

"Yes, Regulus," Sirius put on a, well, serious voice. "I must mingle with old ugly rich men so that when father inevitably and by god...." he pressed his hands together in mock prayer. "Finally leaves this mortal coil to burn in hell, I can take over the family business and make him proud!" Sirius rolled his eyes, slipping back into a flirty lilt.

"Bye Remus, hopefully this won't be the last time we meet." Sirius' gaze swept up the entirety of Remus once more, it felt like a wild fire, before he turned away and left with the other three men.

But then....

Oh.

OH.

That meant Regulus wasn't the heir to the Black family.

If Regulus, his initial target and heir to the Black family, was Sirius' little brother...

If Sirius was to take over the family business when Orion Black died....

It meant Sirius was the heir.

Remus had to kill Sirius.

His target was Sirius.

Sirius Black.

Fuck.

#the marauders #fanfic #mafia au #remus is a hitman #but hes in love with his target #crime family au #remus lupin #Sirius black #regulus black #evan rosier #barty crouch jr #wolfstar #rosekiller #jegulus #hehehehe #i thought about this on my drive home from work and decided to write it out

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jackalspine · 2 months

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The way I collected them all like Pokémon.

#I subconsciously seek out um. a specific group of people.#this was in middle school when none of them were out.#to this fucking day all of my closest friends are not Not part of the alphabet mafia..#I really speed ran the LGBT before any of us fycking realized #none of my closest friends are people I knew were queer when I befriended them #inevitable tbh I targeted the artists in my charter ass middle school

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mdemn · 3 months

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[taps mic] is this thing on ? [doesn’t wait for an answer before i start speaking] much younger and much more naïve sarah and paulie but it’s fast car by tracy chapman. right ? right .

#walk with me #i’m gonna throw up #and when i write this for my target audience of just me . then what #head in hands #sarah marino #paulie lombardo #paulie lombardo x sarah marino #mde #mafia definitive edition #post: personal

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martianbugsbunny · 7 months

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Yesterday I was catching a ride home with a new irl friend (friend?!?!?!!) and the directions on my phone said "go straight" and I was like "ew" and she laughed and then today as we were about to part ways she was like y'know I wanted to ask you smthn and I was like shoot and then she was like about that joke you made yesterday...you part of the alphabet mafia? and I was like yuh except I don't kill people but I DO slay and she laughed (again!!!!) and then I was like with pants like these? duh. and she was like man my gaydar is just no good and I was like so happy at the idea that a good gaydar would pick me up, at the idea of being on the gaydar, I think it was one of the best days I've had in a while

#cargo pants btw #I love them #I also love my cargo shorts that I got on clearance in the men's department at target I wanted to cry the first time I put them on #but like a fool I was suckered in by a few cool days into believing it was actually 'fall' enough to wear my long pants more often #I should be better at this I was born in the Midwest #shame on me #it was so awesome #she was like yes I finally have one queer friend #GIRL I'm literally the queer friend #that makes me so happy #I'm the queer friend #part of the alphabet mafia #share my joy!!!! I'm literally so ecstatic about that entire exchange #gaydar #queer joy #bisexual #bi #lgbtq #queer

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nights-at-the-opera · 8 months

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I'm getting promoted posts from Targeted Individuals on TikTok again.

#targeted individual #Mafia #Real SANposting #Sanposting #Conspiracy

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mermaidsirennikita · 8 months

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gave my mom sara cate's praise for her birthday and now she texts me today to announce that she's reading her "first gay romance"

#romance novel blogging #it's mafia target by mila finelli #which if you've ever read that book......#she went from reading het romance only to reading a book where the meet cute is an assassin sucking his target off #in a nightclub #and making deep eye contact before deliberately swallowing #so she really jumped some levels #but it's a gr8 book so #she didn't really read more high heat/erotic romances until fairly recently so she's learning

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greenlog17 · 28 days

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Each mafia in my archon mafia au have their own headquarters and ways of dealing with... issues, as they would say.

Mondstat: as mentioned in previous posts, mondstats mafia has a front in the church of favonious, their main hq meanwhile is hidden within old mondstat and protected by devalin. Their mo in terms of the rare killings they do is suffocation.

Liyue: the adepti have various hideouts and safehouses all over liyue, but the main hq is junyun karst, their mo is burying most of the body underground and depending on who did it it may only be the head sticking out (zhongli) or all the body parts seperate and sticking out (xiao, shenhe).

Inazuma: within inazuma pretty much every religious site is a front for a mafia, the raidens have grand narukami shrines, and the watasumi have their shrine. The kamisatos have their estate and the komore teahouse. the raidens deal with people just like lightning: quick, painfuly and with alot of electricity, while the watasumi and kamisatos perfer the classic stabing and poisoning respectively.

Sumeru: sumerus mafia has pretty much the entire forrest at their disposal, but with the favor of the ¹aranara, they use varnara as a hq they can fall back to. to help prove their point and keep the public in their favor instead of killing anybody they just stick em in trees with the aranaras help.

Fontaine: with the mafia in control of the goverment the need for a hideout decreases drastically, but still the spina de rosula have many-a safe houses in possion and the underground of the court. If you somehow piss off the spina de rosula, avoid the ensuing court order, warrant, and gardes sent for your arrest, then you may get a personal visit from furina making sure your sleeping with the fishes. Aka shes gonna drown ya. be thankful its not nuevellette whod just cut you in half with his water jet of a charged attack.

The fatui: northland bank being a very popular and widespread bank allows for the fatui to get from nation to nation without arousing suspicion while also being very profitable. If you anger the fatui, any loans you may have with northland bank may spike dramatically in interest rates, if you escalate the situation to the point that a harbinger gets personally sent after you? Then might as well write your will now because you wont be escaping the cold fury of the fatui.

Abyss order: the abyss orders main hq is in well... the abyss. Though they do have safe houses in the chasm and ekdnomiya due to how dangerous the abyss can be. the abyss order loves to use monster "accidents" to deal with their targets.

¹without the archons being gods of the elements in this au the aranara wouldnt just blindly follow nahida, but with the mafia in sumeru focusing a large amount of their efforts in stopping the pollution of sumeru they are willing to work togother to help save the forrests.

#genshin impact #genshin au #archon mafia au #fatui #genshin impact au #aranara #abyss order #each mafias hq and other fronts #also how they eliminate problems and targets.

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msclaritea · 1 month

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#Brendan Fraser #A Whole Ass Tool To The Hollywood Mafia and Scientology #HFPA #Hollywood Foreign Press Association Was Targeted #Oscars Good Guy Cover

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dropped-the-soap · 1 year

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you know what i would want to see (among other things)

scene in a pub, joe and henry and vito. they joke around, and henry drops a line along the one he had told vito back when he’d found him in a wardrobe with galante. and vito doesn’t even react and joe laughs-

and then there goes someone else who makes a gay joke about vito, and again, vito doesn’t even react, it’s possible he can’t even tell at this point, he hears it so often that he wouldn’t waste his breath getting angry, it’s just words, so he only shrugs and

cut to henry's jaw dropping in disbelief, the nerve of the guy

and joe hurling himself over the table, smashing a bottle on the guy’s head

#mafia 2 #m2 #mafia 2 talk #joe barbaro #henry tomasino #vito scaletta #vito argues that he hears it all the time from them #henry and joe going yeah but we say it with LOVE #as they should #would be easy to think for some guys around that vito is a target for gay jokes #WRONG my dude you will die if you talk shit about him

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phantomwised · 1 year

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Thinking abt how the first time I watched kinnporsche, the first time we see Pete use a gun I had to pause and rewind bc I was like "WAIT IS THE WEIRD ROOMMATE A LEFTIE??" and I was later extremely validated to learn that Build is, in fact, left handed.

And then I found it funny that despite Bible also being a leftie, every gun Vegas uses in the show is held as if he's righthanded.

(Not that you shoot a gun based on your handedness, it's based on sightedness, so you could be left-handed but right-eye dominant so you would shoot righthanded, but cross-sightedness isnt super common)

#Of all the niche things about me my time spent competitively target shooting is a real benefit with all these mafia shows lately #shit shaye posts #vegaspete #kinnporsche #kinnporshe the series #kpts

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intertexts-moving · 7 months

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THIS IS WHAT IVE BEEN FUCKING SAYING.however. oh god. okay. im certain the SIU director knows what's up. abt the metaverse. makoto (who i don't trust worth shit)(she is also the most likely suspect 2 be this "black mask" i think) is keeping an eye eye on the gang because the principal told her. i don't remember who told the principal except it was some guy in a position of authority above him. she also knows the gay little argyle freak who knows (interns with?????) sae who i also know is plot relevant. god. fuck.

#also i bet the fucking. mafia guy who their next target is is related 2 sojiro somehow. thats my prediction.#txt #p5 lb #p5

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pseudonympls · 1 year

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How do we all feel about a modern day Swan Lake retelling, set in New York with mafia/dark magic themes? 🦢✨

#oc/reader as princess odette. the wealthy daughter of a business mogul #and bo as the prince. a soulful artist #they grew up together. bo pulled her pigtails and she outsmarted him on many an occasion #but as they bloomed into young adults. so did their feelings for one another.#but the young girls father is a target of a dangerous mafia plot. what methods will they employ to take it all #will young love triumph over the darkened hearts of the greedy. the desperate #or will a shadow fall over the city that never sleeps #love - a forgotten shrivelled leaf at the bottom of the pond

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softlyfiercely · 1 year

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sorry I’m not over this yet. I am so tired of seeing people on tumblr make fun of other people for having “icky” interests or hobbies. I hate the way people talk about “gross freaks” or “shameful sex” or “who even likes that lol” or “something is wrong with them” as if they’re confident that no one who that applies to could possibly be listening.

Well…we are. We’re here on this website (and your discord servers btw) hanging out with you and our nasty gross little freak feelings do get hurt when we are just minding our own business and then see someone casually use us as a punchline or imply that they’d prefer not to share a society with us or that our media preferences are inherently wrong.

Anti kink terf swerf whatevers - at least I can mostly avoid them, and ignore them, because they’ve got this entire belief system i find abhorrent. But when someone who otherwise shares my interests and who I like and respect just casually drops a “[people like me] should all be in prison” well it’s not very nice

And I know a lot of it is hyperbole, jokes, whatever. But that kind of makes it worse? Like why are people with (my) specific hobbies or interests suddenly the casual, conversational target of cruelty? I’d really prefer for there not to be a category of “people it’s okay to bully in the name of having something to say”

Also, even the people in the notes of that mafia romance post trying to explain or defend it were doing so from this distant, third person, almost anthropological way. It’s frankly condescending. No one speaking up saying “actually I like this, because it’s fun for me, and that’s okay.” Gee I wonder why.

I’m tired of all the brainrot on here about whether ao3 should be illegal or whether anyone who likes XYZ kink is committing thought crime or which specific sexual minority or fiction genre is NastyBad today. Some people actually believe it and others have just ambiently picked up on the notion that oh, okay, we’re making fun of THESE people now.

Maybe just chill out and accept that other people like stuff that you don’t. You don’t have to see the appeal. You don’t have to understand it. You don’t have to click on our ao3 tags. But you also don’t have to start acting like our very existence is funny - at best - and horrifying and dangerous. Chill the fuck out and let people enjoy things.

#I’ve been made fun of for my hobbies and interests my entire life #you’re not funny or righteous you’re just a bully #if you’d never make fun of someone for being really into moss or comics or Mesopotamian history #maybe consider not treating other interests as acceptable targets for nastiness #i read mafia romance and I vote

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