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#Lee Jihoon Recommendation
ahlovelightaflame · 7 months
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Seventeen Recommendations ~ Lee Jihoon
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Take a Chance With Me by @februaryflowers
Slytherin!Jihoon X Slytherin!Reader by @lovelylunarwriting
Handwriting by @soundofseventeen
Single Dad!Jihoon by @hanniiesuckle17
Late Night Distractions by @hansolmates
Versace on the Floor by @miraclewoozi
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nixtape-foryou · 3 months
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✿ SHOP LOTUSES
The lotus flower, a symbol of purity, overcoming adversity, and rebirth, carries positive meanings across various cultures and religions. Thriving in swampy and unpleasant waters, its symbolism is rooted in the plant's ability to produce beautiful flowers amidst challenging conditions, which remind us that beauty can emerge even when life looks ugly.
LIMITED STOCK - VENDORS NEEDED
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Bouquets = Series | Stems = Oneshots | Seeds = Drabbles | In Shipment = Ongoing
STEMS
On Film by seungcheolownsmyheart (14.0k) || Strangers to Lovers || You don’t think you’re ever going to get used to being in the spotlight. You secretly loathe the feeling that you get when somebody is watching you. You aren’t very keen on people taking your picture when you aren’t looking and don’t want it. But for some reason, whenever you see him, your whole word view flips. After all, what’s the harm in a few measly pictures?
Give Us A Chance by mxxndreams (1.8k) ☆☆ || College AU, Exes to Lovers || After your roommate ditched you at a party you didn't want to be at, your only way to get home is to call someone, and that someone happens to be your ex, Jihoon.
A (K)night & Consequences by mxxndreams (5.3k) ☆☆ || Supernatural AU, Angst || Finally, Y/N gathered the courage to ask him out. What she wasn’t expecting was what would happen afterward...
Second Life by chocosvt (9.2k) || Angst || Freedom was a word that had completely lost its meaning - unable to escape from a toxic relationship, you can only find happiness upon confiding in Jihoon, the spirit of a writer who died a century ago.
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fantasyescapes17 · 11 months
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Manners (Part 2, Final)
Viscount Joshua Hong is by far the most eligible bachelor in London. Rich, handsome, and renowned for his excellent manners and refined tastes. Young woman would kill for the chance to be the Viscount's chosen bride. But nobody can quite determine which of the young ladies he prefers, and you are beginning to have your doubts. Is the Viscount really as gentlemanly as the ton seems to think?
Genre: Joshua Hong x Female!reader. Regency!AU (It's sort of Bridgerton-esque in the sense that I give zero attention to historical accuracy and prioritize aesthetics lmao) You are a sibling to all the Lees (Woozi, DK, Dino) so your last name is Lee but the reader has no other specific characteristics, physical or otherwise.
Word Count: 5.2k+
Part 1
Series Masterlist [I would highly recommend reading the earlier stories in this series, Patience, and Candle, before this one but it's not strictly necessary.]
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You had never been formally courted before, and therefore had no inkling of what to expect from your new courtship with Viscount Hong. Indeed, you had scarcely even processed the events of the night before. The entire evening- right from Viscount Hongs' unannounced arrival up until his proposal of marriage- felt rather like an intense fever dream.
You were awoken from a fitful sleep early that morning by your maid. 
“Miss- oh miss, you must  awaken, there has been a delivery for you!” she cried frantically. 
You sat up in bed and rubbed your tired eyes. Lily and Nessie ran into your room in their nightgowns, giggling as they climbed up onto the bedcovers. They were followed by two maids struggling to carry an enormous basket of arranged pink and red roses between them. They placed the assortment precariously on your bedside table. 
“What is this?” you asked, confused. 
“A delivery for you miss- there is a card as well.” 
The maid handed you the card and your sisters climbed up behind you eagerly to peek at it. 
“Read it aloud!” Lily ordered, and you had no choice but to take the card into your hands and read out the message written in Viscount Hong’s neat and careful handwriting. 
Miss Lee,
I thought perhaps some flowers would brighten your morning- I hope the events of last night have not caused you too much distress. I did fear that writing to you would be too forward but then again, I believe we can agree that the mistake I have made so far is failing to be forward enough. 
May I persuade you to join me for a ride in the park this evening? If you are concerned about the lack of a chaperone, you may bring Chan- I will ensure an extra horse is available for him. 
Yours, 
Joshua
Lily and Nessie squealed in delight and even the maids were biting back their smiles. Sending flowers and a personalised invitation was a bold and romantic gesture indeed; you could not help the fluttering that arose in your heart. 
It appeared that Viscount Hong meant business. 
—-----------------------------------------
“I did suspect that Joshua might harbour some affection for you,” Jihoon admitted over breakfast. Your father was eating in his study, leaving you and your siblings to speak freely about the previous night's events in the dining room. “He always asks after you whenever he sees me or Seokmin.” 
Seokmin agreed, mouth full of scrambled eggs. “He does ask about you often, now that I think of it, but I thought he was only being polite. The Viscount is always so well-mannered.” 
You frowned at your brother. “Unlike you, Seokmin. Please swallow your food before you speak.” 
“It’s only us siblings here,” Seokmin protested.  
“You should be setting a better example as a gentleman for Chan.” 
Chan scoffed before sipping at his tea. “Please don’t insult me, sister. I know better than to emulate anything Seokmin does.” 
They began to argue and you did not have the energy or inclination to interrupt them. The gravity of your situation was slowly beginning to set in. You still harboured a certain girlish pleasure at the thought of Viscount Hong being in love with you- but you were also forced to begin thinking about what this proposal from a nobleman so superior in station to you would mean for you and your family. 
Jihoon noticed your expression. 
“Are you all right, sister?” he asked gently as Seokmin and Chan continued to argue. 
You turned to your elder brother with a hesitant smile. Jihoon was certainly the most mature of your siblings, and you trusted him implicitly.
"Do you think it will be alright? The entire ton has been watching to see whom the Viscount will marry. I cannot even begin to think of  how many young ladies must have their sights set on him. The thought of the gossip alone…"
Jihoon smiled kindly. "I did not think you were the sort of woman to be easily disturbed by gossip, sister."
"I-I am not, but you must admit that people will talk about it and you know that everyone holds him in exceedingly high regard while I am…" you bit your lip and looked at your brother, hoping he would understand your fears. 
Jihoon sighed and nodded. "I won't lie. It is an unexpected proposal and will certainly generate some surprise among the ton."
"What should I do?"
"I am sure word has not spread just yet. You should speak to Joshua about your fears."
You sighed and nodded. Perhaps you should. 
—--------------------------------------------------
It was a warm and pleasant afternoon; perfect for a ride in the park. Unfortunately, this meant that many other members of the ton had made similar plans. You were uncomfortably aware of the curious stares of some young ladies who passed by you on the walking trail. 
The Viscount was already waiting for you and Chan with the horses, but you had to stand aside and wait for a few moments as Chan monopolised the Viscount's attention. Once your younger brother's questions had been answered and he had taken his pick of the horses, the Viscount carefully took the reins of the horse you would ride and turned to you with a smile. 
"May I help you up, Miss Lee?"
Joshua stepped closer to you when you nodded. You tried not to show how flustered you felt when he gently took your hand and placed it on his shoulder, giving you the boost you needed to push yourself up onto the horse and seat yourself side-saddle. 
"Are you comfortable?" he asked with a caring smile. 
"Uh-yes, yes thank you very much," you replied. 
The Viscount and Chan each mounted their own horses. The three of you began a slow-paced ride around the park, but Chan could not resist pushing the purebred horse for a little more speed. 
"Chan! Don't go far, stay within sight!" you called after your brother as he went further ahead. Your brother merely lifted a hand to signal that he'd heard you. 
The Viscount brought his horse up to trot gently alongside yours. He was a skilled rider. 
"I… I received the flowers you sent me this morning," you began awkwardly in an attempt to make some conversation with Joshua. "Thank you. They were beautiful."
He nodded. "I am glad you liked them."
"I did. Very much."
"Have I made you uncomfortable, Miss Lee?" Joshua asked suddenly. He had a worried smile on his face. 
"N-no, why would you think so?"
"You seem to be avoiding my eyes."
You cleared your throat. Why did Joshua have to notice? It was true. You couldn't look at him, and not only because he was extremely handsome and his kind eyes caused butterflies to erupt in your stomach. You were simply too aware of the people watching you- there was a group of young ladies near the trees that gaped at you openly, and another pair of gentlemen who had been casting glances at you since Viscount Hong had helped you up onto your horse. 
"It… it is nothing," you said quickly. 
Joshua sighed. "Miss Lee. Please. The intention behind this courtship is to make you more comfortable with me and to trust me. If there is anything that troubles you-"
"There are too many eyes on us," you blurted out. 
Joshua was silent for a long moment. 
"I see. I've made another mistake," he said quietly. 
You turned to him with wide eyes. "No, not at all-"
"I have. It was quite foolish of me to ask you to come here with just your brother and no proper chaperone- and our courtship is not yet common knowledge to the ton. I failed to take your feelings into consideration, and-"
You felt miserable and rushed to correct him. "Viscount Hong, please, I never meant to suggest that you were responsible for this-"
"But I am responsible."
You shook your head and began to explain that it wasn't his fault, that it was your own insecurities and fears that were making you uncomfortable. But Joshua had already set his lips in a straight line and spurred his horse forward to catch up with Chan, leaving you behind. 
This was not a good start. 
Not at all. 
—-------------------------------------------
The ride at the park ended earlier than it should have; Chan was vocally disappointed but you were too mortified by the entire incident to object and Joshua was firm in sending you home safely escorted by his servants. 
Still; the damage was done. 
Word of your potential courtship with Joshua Hong had spread among the ton and you were faced with the full extent of the situation not three days later, at the ball hosted by the Hessingtons. 
Joshua had sent you flowers every single morning leading up to the ball, and had even written to apologise for his thoughtless invitation to ride in the park. He requested you to reserve him a dance at the Hessingtons' ball. 
You had, of course, accepted. 
The reality that this would be the first, formal social event where almost every single person in the room would have their eyes on you was clear from the moment you made your entrance with Jihoon and Seokmin. 
You had become accustomed to blending into the background at balls- Seokmin was lively and charming, hence rarely had trouble obtaining his desired female dance partners. Jihoon was more reserved when it came to women and dancing. But he had many friends among the ton and was often in the company of other gentlemen engaging in conversations about business. You had always been content to sit at the sidelines, accepting the offer of a dance when you received one and mingling with other ladies when they approached you.
But a lady being courted by Viscount Joshua Hong did not have the luxury of being ignored by the ton. 
“Miss Lee!” cried one of the more obnoxious gossip-mongers, Mrs. Patty, as soon as she found you alone at a bench. “You must come and dispel these strange rumours about you. Is it true that you are being courted by our lovely Viscount Hong?” 
You hesitated. “Erm…”
“Ha!” Mrs. Patty cried triumphantly, turning to her companions. She understood your hesitation to be a confirmation of her beliefs. “I knew there was no chance that little Miss Lee could capture our Viscount. I have been quite observant of his attention to the Duchess of Graham of late and I believe it is only a matter of time until they announce their engagement.” 
One of the other ladies tutted with disapproval. “But then Miss Lee must explain how she came to be riding in the park with Viscount Hong!” 
Your response was interrupted by the sound of a strong female voice behind you. 
“Miss Lee is not required to explain anything,” a young lady said sharply as she took your arm. You recognised her immediately, despite never having conversed with her before. 
This was Miss Hong. Viscount Hong’s infamous younger sister. 
"Miss Hong-" you began to greet her. 
"Come, Miss Lee. I have saved a seat for you near the refreshment tables, and you must sit with me until the dancing begins," Miss Hong said simply. 
You allowed her to lead you away from the gossip-mongers. 
You knew what everyone in London society said about Miss Hong. She was praised for being the most skilled pianoforte player among the ton, and it was well established that there was no young lady who could rival the musical talents of the Viscount's sister. 
But Miss Hong also had a reputation for being excessively fashionable, vain, and quick-tempered. While her status and wealth prevented anyone from saying so to her face, Miss Hong did not enjoy the same universal approval of society that her older brother did. 
"Miss Hong," you said gently. "Thank you for interrupting on my behalf. I really did not know how to answer their questions."
She brushed off your gratitude. "You need not bother about Mrs. Patty. That odious woman has been trying to make my life miserable since I was a child. I am not surprised she attempted to sink her claws into you."
You smiled awkwardly. "I see."
"I have been looking forward to meeting this elusive Miss Lee that seems to have the power to make my brother miserable," she said. You were shocked by her words, but when you turned to look at her, she was giggling. 
"I-I am so sorry, I really have no intention of upsetting the Viscount," you tried to explain. 
"Oh Miss Lee, you are such a sweetheart!" Miss Hong said with a carefree laugh. "I meant that my normally suave brother makes the most foolish mistakes around you and then renders himself miserable afterwards. You needn't apologise to me, I find the whole affair quite entertaining."
You relaxed a little. You had been anxious about how Viscount Hong's family would react to your courtship but, judging from Miss Hong's behaviour, she at least did not openly disapprove of you. 
"I warned Joshua he was being hasty about the proposal and that he should have someone speak to you first to assess your reaction," Miss Hong continued as she gestured for you to join her on the bench. "But he said it was not appropriate and that naturally he had to seek your father's permission before speaking to you."
You nodded. "I see…"
Miss Hong gave you a sympathetic smile. "My brother is kind but he is still a man. Society is more forgiving towards his type. He does not understand the fears and pressures that we face as young ladies."
You felt the need to defend your Viscount. 
"He has certainly been very thoughtful and considerate towards me-"
Miss Hong laughed. "Has he? Or perhaps you are blinded by your love for him."
"But the entire ton agrees that the Viscount has the most excellent manners, and-"
"Oh," Miss Hong said scornfully. "The ton. Miss Lee, I am sorry to say that if you intend to marry my brother, you must learn to take the opinions of the ton with a pinch of salt. Being a Viscountess is not an easy job. And it is certainly not one for a weak or feeble-minded woman."
Her words struck you like a blow to the face. 
A Viscountess. You would be a Viscountess if you were to marry Joshua. It suddenly occurred to you how much power and authority came from a title like that, and the strength and poise with which women carrying such coveted titles conducted themselves. 
You had certainly never seen a Viscountess who stumbled over her words in front of gossiping old women. 
Miss Hong noticed your sudden silence. 
"I apologise if I have offended you, Miss Lee," she said quickly. "It was not my intention to call you weak or feeble-minded. I am sure you are neither. But if I may be so bold as to make a suggestion, purely coming from my goodwill as your potential future sister-in-law…"
You nodded at her. You did not know if Miss Hong was as vain or quick-tempered as the ton claimed. But in this confusing reality, she was the only person willing to tell you the truth. 
 "Please do," you said. 
"You should use this courtship wisely. Not only to consider whether you wish to marry my brother… but also whether you wish to become a Viscountess. If you choose to marry Joshua, you should carry his title as a matter of pride, not as a burden. That is the only way you can be happy together."
Oh. 
You took a deep breath as you considered her words and then turned to Miss Hong, clasping her hand in yours.
"Thank you," you told her quietly. "For your honesty."
She smiled- a sudden, genuine smile that was rare for the fashionable young debutante. 
"Thank you for not being offended by it," Miss Hong replied. "Now, I regret to inform you that the dancing has begun and my brother approaches to claim your company for the first dance."
You nodded before turning to see that Joshua had indeed appeared from the crowd with his usual handsome smile. 
"Miss Lee," the Viscount greeted you warmly, offering you his hand. He raised an eyebrow at his sister. "I hope my sister has not been troubling you."
"Not at all!" you said quickly. "She has been very kind."
Miss Hong stood and smiled as she smoothed down the front of her fashionably decorated ball-gown. "Excuse me- I have promised this dance to Mr. Hessington," she said lightly before disappearing into the crowd. 
The Viscount turned to you. 
"And I believe you have promised this dance to me," he reminded you with a smile. 
"So I have."
You allowed Joshua to lead you out onto the floor for a pleasant waltz. The dance was not very demanding- and it allowed you both the chance to have a much-needed conversation. 
"I do hope my sister did not trouble you," Joshua said slowly. "She is known to be rather…"
"Honest?" you asked. 
"I was going to say impudent," he replied with a chuckle. "Although I dare say she usually means well."
"No, not at all. She helped me put things in perspective. I will admit that everything about our courtship is… new to me. I cannot help but have some fears and concerns about it all, and… I… I do not want you to think that I am ungrateful for the flowers and letters because I really am not, you have been very thoughtful and kind, I-I only…"
You were beginning to stumble over your words and your cheeks turned hot. Joshua's hand squeezed your gloved one reassuringly. 
"Tell me," he pressed you softly. "I would like nothing more than to hear your feelings."
"I wish we could have a conversation," you admitted slowly. "Only the two of us. Without- without any interruptions or eavesdropping chaperones so that-that we could have an honest discussion about the future and what this really means for each of us."
Joshua's expression was gentle. 
"Of course, Miss Lee. I agree entirely. I think we have stumbled blindly through this courtship without understanding each other. An open discussion would certainly help."
You nodded. "Well, yes. Open but…" you cleared your throat and glanced around you anxiously. "Well. Discreet, if you understand my meaning. Since we are not officially engaged."
He chuckled. 
"Of course. I understand perfectly. Would you do me the honour of coming to the assembly rooms on Thursday evening? I believe I can arrange for our… discreet discussion there."
You smiled and nodded. 
"Yes. Yes, that sounds wonderful."
"Excellent."
—---------------------------------------------------
Viscount Hong was a man of his word. 
You arrived at the assembly rooms on Thursday; Seokmin had been glad to accompany you as he had a bet to settle at the card tables with Mr. Yoon Jeonghan. 
Upon your arrival, the Viscount offered you his arm and requested your company for a walk around the gardens. You accepted- after all, you were now openly courting him, what harm could a walk about the gardens do? To your surprise, Joshua led you towards a thick copse of trees at the end of the path that provided complete cover and privacy from the rest of the gardens and the assembly rooms. 
"Shall we speak here?" Viscount Hong asked you. 
You nodded hesitantly. "Yes- I am shocked that you discovered this, it is such a private little corner."
Joshua looked slightly embarrassed. "The spot was recommended to me by Mr. Kim Mingyu. He is rather more… experienced than I am when it comes to finding ways to do things that society may not approve of."
You giggled. "You mean he is a rake."
"He admits it quite openly," Joshua agreed. 
"And we will not be interrupted- nobody will accidentally stumble upon us here?" you asked nervously.
"It is unlikely. In any case, I have asked Mr. Kim to watch over the garden path from the balcony. If anyone begins to walk in this direction, he will send us a warning," Joshua replied. 
You were flattered that Joshua would go to so much effort to indulge your simple request for a private conversation. 
"Thank you," you told him honestly. 
"It is the least I could do, Miss Lee. I understand that I have thrown quite a wrench in your life this past week. You have me quite flustered- I seem to repeatedly make poor judgements in your regard, and I will strive to remedy that."
You looked up to see the genuine regret in his eyes. It was still so strange to you that the Viscount should care so much about you and you could not help but feel a warmth towards him. 
"Viscount Hong, please do not say so. You have not made any mistakes, really."
Joshua reached his hands out hesitantly towards yours. You realised that he was seeking permission to hold your hands- and you offered them to him freely. 
His warm hands clasped yours. 
"May I go first?" he asked. 
You nodded.
"You asked me the other night why I wanted to marry you," Joshua began. He spoke slowly- as though every word was being carefully considered. "I will admit I was not prepared for that question, and I did a poor job of answering it. Will you allow me to answer it again?"
"Of course."
"Over the last year, ever since it became clear that the time had come for me to marry- I have met and considered many young women of my acquaintance. They all have their charms, of course, but I found that only your charms made a consistent and lasting impact on me."
You looked at him with surprise. 
"My charms? I must insist you tell me what these are, Viscount Hong, since I am entirely unaware of them," you laughed as your cheeks slowly turned hot.
Joshua chuckled. "I would be glad to elaborate. I know your brothers well, Miss Lee, and I am familiar with the difficulties that your family has faced. I have watched you bear them with quiet dignity. You have a strength and maturity that is rare among young women of your age- indeed, rare for any person at all. Even in the face of my hasty proposal, you had the presence of mind to stop me and question me. You are kind and generous; but not a woman who is easily swayed. That is what makes me confident that you would be a perfect choice for a life partner, and makes me want more than anything in the world to be your husband."
Your heart swelled. It was strange; you had expected some vague words from him about love and admiration- something along the lines of what you read in novels. 
But Joshua's answer gave you more confidence than any declaration of love could have. 
You now understood that his proposal, as sudden as it may have seemed to you, was not a rash or hasty decision on his part. Joshua had watched you, considered you, understood you… and still chosen you. 
"I… don't know if I deserve such praise," you told him softly. "I have not behaved very maturely this past week."
"What makes you say that?" he asked gently. 
"I have been selfish. My fears and insecurities got the better of me, and I worried about the gossip that our courtship would create and what people would think. How they would react to you proposing to someone like me."
Joshua shook his head. "Those are reasonable fears. And I have not done a very good job of protecting you from the ton's speculations."
You took a deep breath and looked up at him. 
"You do not need to protect me."
Joshua looked startled. "Miss Lee…"
"I have had time to think about what I want from our courtship, and what I can offer.  Entering into this with the expectation that I should be protected from the hardships involved is foolish. If we are to be married, then I will be a Viscountess. I cannot live my life fearing the opinions of the ton."
Joshua smiled. Your face had taken on a determined expression. It was the first time since the night of his proposal that you looked like yourself again- without that fear and anxiety looming behind your eyes. 
"You have nothing to fear from the ton," he assured you. "I will always be with you."
"Your sister said something to me that struck me deeply," you told him. "She said that if I was to become a Viscountess, then I should carry the title as a matter of pride and not as a burden."
Joshua sighed. "My sister has a strange relationship with pride."
"Perhaps so, but I think there is some truth in what she said," you replied. "It boils down to this… I would be proud to call myself your wife. And as long as you would be proud to call yourself my husband, then I do not think that there is anything society can do to ruin our happiness."
Joshua's eyes twinkled. His grip on your hands pulled you closer to him- you were mere inches away from him now and you could not tear your eyes away from his. 
"Dangerous words, Miss Lee," he warned. 
"Oh?"
"You are only making me fall more in love with you."
Your cheeks turned hot but you smiled up at him. "And you are treading dangerous waters, Viscount Hong. We are alone here, without a chaperone. I thought you were a gentleman?"
Joshua nodded. His eyes briefly flickered down to your lips. "I am. Will you allow me to kiss you?"
You flushed. "We are not even engaged…"
"I will stop if you ask me to."
"... Do not stop."
Joshua's right arm wrapped around your waist and pulled you closer to him. Your hands naturally placed themselves on his shoulders as he leaned down and pressed his lips to yours. 
It was a delicate kiss; one filled with passion and longing. Joshua was careful with you. One of his hands cupped your cheek as he pulled away slightly. He pressed his forehead to yours and gave you a small smile. 
"Have I made another mistake?" he asked breathlessly. 
You felt light-headed from the kiss but you managed to look up at him with a small pout. 
"You know perfectly well that you have not," you scolded him. 
"I had to check- my judgement always fails me around you. You cloud my senses," Joshua whispered. "You are the only woman that can make me doubt my own actions."
You looked up at the handsome man in front of you with adoration.
"I would never want you to doubt yourself," you told him firmly. 
"Then shall I kiss you again?"
"Please."
Joshua kissed you again- and again, and again, until you were both entangled in a mess of lips and tongues and limbs, allowing your bodies to express the adoration that words could not satisfy. In your heated whispers between soft, sensuous kisses, Viscount Hong became Joshua, and Joshua became my love. 
—---------------------------------------------------------
The passionate courtship that ensued had the ton in an uproar. 
It was all over the gossip sheets, and on the lips of every member of the ton: Miss Lee had cast a spell on Viscount Joshua Hong and he was absolutely smitten with her. 
Joshua made no effort to abate the gossip. Instead, flowers and letters arrived at your doorstep every single morning. Some days he would send you presents; pretty little hand mirrors, ribbons, satin gloves…. always accompanied by love notes stating how they made him think of you. (He even once sent you a set of silk garters that was almost opened by Nessie. You scolded him thoroughly and his gifts remained family-appropriate thereafter). 
Joshua danced with you-and only you- at every ball. It caused an immense displeasure among the ladies of the ton and Mrs. Patty even saw fit to complain to you on one occasion. 
"How unfortunate that Viscount Hong will not look at the Duchess anymore," Mrs. Patty bemoaned openly to you. "She would have suited him so well- so rich and with her own title."
"Yes," you said to the older woman calmly. "It is unfortunate indeed that Viscount Hong has no need to marry for riches or titles. He shall have to settle with marrying for love, instead."
Mrs. Patty gave you a sharp look but you heard no more from her on the subject. 
The whispers were not all pleasant, naturally. Many gossiped about how Viscount Hong was clearly marrying down, how your dowry and station and beauty were so far beneath his. It was painful when these whispers reached your ears- but it was a pain that you would gladly bear for the privilege of being with Joshua. To his credit, Joshua swiftly and politely silenced anything that reached his ears. 
The weeks flew by; and on the 30th day from his initial hasty proposal, Viscount Joshua Hong appeared once more on your doorstep just before suppertime. (This time with notice- Dotty had been able to prepare her venison pie.)
"My father is away on business," you informed Joshua as you led him to the dining room where your siblings were all waiting for supper to be served. "So I am afraid that you will not be able to ask for his permission to  propose to me again."
"How unfortunate," Joshua said with a chuckle as Lily ran up to him and greeted him with a hug. He lifted her into his arms easily and set her down in her seat at the table. "It would be very inappropriate to propose to you without permission- but whose permission shall I seek?"
Chan piped up. "You could ask Jihoon."
Jihoon looked up from his plate with a raised eyebrow. "I would not dare to assume such a monumental responsibility. You will have to seek permission elsewhere."
"Seokmin?" Joshua asked. 
Seokmin shrugged. "Ask me again after supper. I am too hungry to grant any permissions at the moment."
Joshua chuckled. "Chan?"
Chan rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "I could be persuaded… for the price of an Arabian horse, perhaps?"
"Absolutely not," you said firmly. 
Joshua settled down into his seat and turned to your little sister Lily, who was looking up at him with a big smile and a gap in her teeth. 
"What shall I do, Lily?" Joshua asked her with a mock sigh. "I had hoped to propose to your elder sister tonight, but your father is not in town and none of your brothers will grant me permission."
Lily frowned. "Why do you need permission?"
"It is good manners to seek the permission of a woman's loved ones before making an offer to her."
"Then I shall grant you permission, Viscount Hong! You may marry my sister."
You couldn't hold back your laugh; Nessie giggled and the corner of even Jihoon's lips curved upwards. Joshua gracefully accepted her permission and then turned to you with his usual handsome, charming smile. 
"Well, Miss Lee; what say you? Will you do me the honour of becoming my wife?" Joshua asked you with a chuckle. Lily looked up at you expectantly with big eyes. 
You smiled back at Joshua. 
"Well, since Lily has granted her permission…"
"Is that a yes?"
"Yes, Viscount Hong. I would be honoured to become your wife."
—--------------------------------------------------------
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babyleostuff · 9 months
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heyyy hope ur doing ok !! I’d really love to hear ur thoughts on how the svt members would teach u to drive (or the ones that can drive anyways!) lots of love xoxo
oh my god, this was SO much fun to write (and now i can't think about anything else but them driving)
seventeen teaching you how to drive | ot13
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CHOI SEUNGCHEOL 
𓆩♡𓆪 kind of like driving with your dad (or your dad trying to explain you maths) - at some point you end up crying. He wants to teach you, he really does, but in the end he gets too impatient, so he just yells and takes the steering wheel from you. 
YOON JEONGHAN 
𓆩♡𓆪 has a kind of “meh” attitude. He teaches you as best as he can, but whatever happens later, happens. Not his issue anymore. But he really tries his best, it’s not like he wants you or anyone else to get hurt. 
 HONG JOSHUA 
𓆩♡𓆪 very patient and gentle, but maybe too gentle. He doesn’t have the heart to scold you, so even if you speed past a “stop” sign and doesn’t stop, he doesn’t say anything. And every time you ask if you did good, he says yes (and cries a little bit inside). 
WEN JUNHUI 
𓆩♡𓆪 he tries his best, but teaching someone how to drive is very hard. You’d probably not even make it out of the parking lot, but you’d be a pro at parking the car. Would scream if you got too close to another car. 
KWON SOONYOUNG 
𓆩♡𓆪 a big no no to this guy. I adore him with my entire heart, but there is no way I would trust him to teach anyone how to drive. He doesn’t care about the speed limits, so there would be a 90% chance you’d get a speeding ticket on your first drive. Also, he’d tell you to turn left at the “no left turn” sign. The music would be blasting and he wouldn’t give a single fuck about anything. 
JEON WONWOO
𓆩♡𓆪 a very patient teacher, would recommend 10/10. Explains everything like a pro (is he an idol or a F1 driver). He would be kind of strict though, but just because he wants to properly teach you how to drive and not harm yourself and others in the process. 
LEE JIHOON
𓆩♡𓆪 sorry bae, not this time <3
XU MINGHAO 
𓆩♡𓆪 takes the job very seriously. Explains everything from the basics about the car itself, but for some reason forgets to teach you the signs. So anytime you ask about a sign, he panics and tells you to just drive faster. As long as you don’t crash into anyone, it’s all good. 
KIM MINGYU  
𓆩♡𓆪 alongside Wonwoo, the best teacher you could have ever asked for. We know that he taught Chan how to drive, so he would have no problem teaching you how to drive as well. I don’t think I can say anything more about him, except for that I wish he was my driving instructor (mine was more like Seungcheol, it was not live, laugh, love). 
LEE SEOKMIN 
𓆩♡𓆪 for some reason he makes you drive very slowly, so you’re more rolling down the street than driving. A kid literally passed you on their scooter. Also, he’d focus too much on the nice view and forget that you technically can’t drive (you almost hit an old lady on the zebra crossing).
BOO SEUNGKWAN 
𓆩♡𓆪 oh no. no. just no. It’s not that he is a bad teacher, he is just too scared. He doesn’t trust himself enough. He’d be clutching the grab handle above the door and his eyes would be closed at all times. He’d just tell you to drive forward and that would be it. 
CHWE VERNON
𓆩♡𓆪 chaotic, but very chill at the same time. He’d mostly be like: you do you boo. You’d have a lot of fun, that’s for sure. If you ever passed the speed limit, he’d be like “yo bro, that’s crazy”.  
LEE CHAN 
𓆩♡𓆪 another great teacher. Might be a bit scared, because he isn’t that experienced himself, but he does his best. His driving lessons would be very safe and he’d make sure that you felt safe and confident behind the wheel.
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sungbeam · 1 year
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nonidol!lee hyunjae x fem!reader
your best friend hyunjae ain't no romeo, but you're still in love... so let's hope he doesn't find out you wrote a whole play about him!
▷ genre, warnings. bffs2l, fluff, angst, comedy/humor, swearing, college au, pining, hyunyn r kinda franchise movie buffs, shirtless hyunjae......, slow burn-ish lol, if ur a theater kid i am so sorry, stress and academic pressures, mentions of a bitter ex-friendship and ex-relationship, sabotaging and low-key terrorizing by an ex-friend, kissing, insecurity, lots of jargon i looked up and hope i'm using correctly, massive leaps in time and multiple chapters that span one day 💀, denial is a river in egypt so ig hyunjae's in egypt
▷ total wc. 30.9k (i actually overshot this one r we surprised 0_0)
this is the fourth installment of the love in unity series! this can be read as a standalone, but there will be references to other fics, and all prev and future yns will be referred to as __!yn !! i do recommend reading at least one of the prior storylines ;')
a/n: mmmmmmmmmm idk what to say but have fun bye!!! AND REBLOG FOR GOD'S SAKE REBLOG PLEASE—
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EPISODE ONE (PILOT): ONE ON ONE
“HAVE you always wanted to be a playwright?”
The question caught you off guard as you glanced up from your tablet screen, the white blue-light contrasting sharply against the warm amber radiating from the small, battery-operated lamp seated on the plastic folding table. There were a couple of technical issues going on behind the curtain at the moment, so the transition to the next person auditioning would be delayed by a couple minutes. In retrospect, it was nothing, but when you were already a couple weeks late behind schedule, a couple of minutes was everything.
A young and bright second-year student sat to your right in the middle rows of the university performing arts center nosebleeds. She was peppy and eager and passionate—all the things that you sometimes saw yourself as when you were her age. Her name was Bae Sumin, and she wasn’t here to audition, nor was she here for you. She was actually here to interview a few of the dancers for the winter showcase in representation of the university’s premier newspaper called The Daily. She had asked if she could sit in for a few of the auditions and observe, maybe ask a few questions; who were you to refuse an eagle-eyed undergrad who reminded you so much of yourself?
“Oh, well,” you began, eyes flitting to the velvet curtain where you saw a man in a dark baseball cap—Lee Jihoon—give you a swift thumbs up, “kind of. Playwriting was my first love, but it eventually turned into screenwriting over time.”
“So why choose playwriting for your capstone instead of screenwriting?” Sumin followed up, as you and her attention turned to the spotlit stage where your next auditioner walked out onto.
You knew the answer to that; you really did. But the audition was beginning, and though he was introducing himself to you, you couldn’t quite get your head in the game. Why did you choose to write a play over directing a film? You quickly murmured an answer to the second-year beside you as the student onstage had gotten so nervous he dropped his copy of the script on the floor. “I guess, when it counts, you always go back to your first love.”
— ✶
It was times like these where you really valued a good, strong cup of coffee.
“—I’m gonna stop you right there.” The poor kid—you really did feel bad for cutting people off sometimes, but you swore it was wholly necessary—froze like a deer in headlights. You stood up from your chair and began making your way down the aisle and into one of the rows that were closer to the stage. “Michael, is it?”
Michael, the student on stage who had been auditioning to play the role of a Napa Valley wine salesman, bobbed his head in affirmation.
You dipped your head. “Okay, Michael. Let me ask you: what is your motivation for this scene as a wine salesman? Because, if I’m being honest, dude, I’ve counted like… four different ways you’re playing this character.” In this singular scene alone. Your head was spinning from stress, and his mannerisms felt right for the role, but his acting itself just wasn’t hitting the mark. (If that even made sense, but your initial thought when he first walked onto stage gave you the aura of a business major.)
“Um,” he stammered, scratching the back of his head, “my motivation is to… sell wine?”
“Sell wine, and? What else?” Please pick up on the lines. Please tell me you read the other lines of this character.
He rifled through his packet of stapled script papers, clammy fingers flipping through and his eyes racing over lines. He probably printed out multiple sheets to audition for multiple parts in case this one fell through. “Oh! I, uhm, I’m supposed to eventually lock Alex and Kai in the wine cellar.”
“Because…” You prompted.
“Because… my boss is the… second cousin of the bride’s uncle?” He quickly added on, and you could see the cogs in his brain turning like rent was due (your rent—your rent was due—oh shit), “Wait! Wait! And Uncle Lee overheard the ex-boyfriend plotting to get Alex alone, so he asked me to hide Alex, and I do it because I want to get promoted.”
You punched the admittedly sky-high ceiling of the performance art hall. “Bingo. Now give me desperate, ass-kissing wine salesman, Michael.”
Michael did indeed give you a desperate, ass-kissing wine salesman. He did so, very well, in fact, that you declared that you were done for the day. Because you definitely were. If you saw any more people and heard the same lines of script over and over for any longer, you were going to commit murder. At least, not without filling your stomach first. When Michael was done and scurrying off stage, you caught one of the sophomores working with Jihoon—you thought her name was SW!Yn—and asked if she could have the house lights turned on.
You trudged back up to your original seat up in the nosebleeds and found that Sumin had disappeared off somewhere. However, she left a baby pink-colored sticky note on the table for you to read: I realized that I have an actual job to do, but watching you work was so cool. Thank you for letting me sit in! x, Sumin. She’d scrawled her phone number below the message line in case you were up for a proper session to let her pick your brain, and you felt yourself smile as you tucked the note into the back of your phone case for later.
“Yn-ie!”
You settled into your seat, an eyebrow cocked in blatant amusement as you watched your best friend, Lee Hyunjae, leap down from the stage and bound up the aisle to where you were. “Where’ve you been for the past two hours?” You mused as you began packing your things away into your backpack at your feet. Hyunjae had come in with you early this morning at seven, and for the three out of five hours you’d been conducting callbacks and auditions, he had been seated beside you to keep you (relatively) sane and to give you his opinion.
He, of course, had not been allowed to sit in for Kim Younghoon’s audition, because that was favoritism. Hyunjae tried to convince you by saying he would be even more judgmental of Younghoon, but you had effectively booted him out of the auditorium. After that, he disappeared to god knew where, and Sumin replaced him.
“I’ve been around,” he said to you casually. Instead of coming into the aisle were you were, he went up one more row. “I’ll tell you about it at lunch. Hungry?”
You patted your stomach, leaning back in your chair and stretching your limbs over your head like a cat. “Yes, sir. I can go for a buffet and a half right about now.”
“Oh, a buffet and a half?” He chuckled. He came up behind you and wrapped his arms over your upper half and rested his chin on top of your head. Your heart skipped about a dozen beats then; his embrace was always very warm. “So that must mean you're resuming this train in the afternoon, too.”
“Glad to know you pay attention.”
“Hey!” He squawked indignantly, no doubt jutting his bottom lip out in a Younghoon-esque pout. “I do pay attention to you.”
You made a face that he couldn’t see, but he could feel you pat his hands. “Sure, buddy, sure.”
Cleaning up didn’t take too long, as you reassured (more so reminded) Jihoon that you would be back at around 3 o’clock sharp. If he or Chan weren’t in to turn on lights and the like, you were certain you could hold your own. You and Hyunjae agreed on heading over to one of the closer restaurants on the Ave, only a few minutes’ walk from the performing arts hall. It was a cozy sort of cafe that served really good wonton noodle soup for both winter and summer days (Hyunjae always teased you for drinking hot soup on hot days, but it was something you had done since you were a kid).
Once the two of you had settled in a booth tucked away into the corner of the establishment, you were both swift to relay your orders to the waiter. Saying you were starving would be an understatement.
“You know, there are just some people who I can’t understand how they’ve made it so far in the program,” Hyunjae said to you as you squeezed a wedge of lemon juice into his glass of water. “Thank you,” he beamed boyishly, accepting the lemony beverage to sip. “—I mean, I’m sure they got in somehow, and like—I have no right to judge, but at this point, shouldn’t you understand the basic principles of design?”
You gave a meager bob of your head, taking your own glass to repeat your actions with a new lemon wedge. “They should if they’re all graduating in one quarter, too.”
“They’re all doing capstones,” he confirmed.
You offered him an amused smile. “Well at least you know that you’re doing okay, then.”
Hyunjae sighed, leaning back against his booth seat. His gaze flickered out the window for a second, then his lip curled upward as he returned his attention to you. “I guess so. Oh!”
He straightened and leaned forward again, bracing his forearms onto the table so he inclined himself toward you. “I was gonna tell you all about my backstage adventure!”
You chuckled. “Do tell, Jae.”
“Well, we begin our adventure with collecting dance kids like Pokemon—”
You sputtered around your straw, nearly snorting water from your nose and you swiftly slapped a hand over your mouth. Hyunjae’s eyes lit up as he laughed, but he was reaching over to hand you a napkin from the dispenser on the table. “I did not expect you to say that,” you managed to croak through your miserable laughter.
Hyunjae wagged his eyebrows at you. “What can I say? I am hilarious.”
“One out of a dozen times.”
“One out of one.”
“One out of ten.”
Hyunjae simply smiled. He could do this all day. “One out of one.”
But so could you. “One out of ten.”
He leaned closer. “One out of one.”
Not one to be beaten out by your best friend, you inched closer with a slightly narrowed gaze. “One. Out. Of. Ten—”
“Order of wonton noodle soup and an order of dan dan mian?” Both you and Hyunjae shot apart, heat crawling up to your cheeks, and you wondered if it was obvious to the bored-looking waiter setting your food down on the table. You passed a glance across the table at Hyunjae, but as always, he seemed practically unfazed. In fact, he was grinning like a madman.
You sighed, rolling your eyes. When the waiter disappeared and left you and Hyunjae to your own, strange devices, Hyunjae took a pair of plastic chopsticks from the collection on the table, wiping the pair down, then handing them to you. You thanked him as you accepted the utensils from him and wiped down a soup spoon for yourself.
As the two of you began digging into your separate dishes—with Hyunjae dipping a spoon into your soup and with you reaching over to pluck a couple pieces of minced pork from his bowl—it seemed that a silent truce about the matter prior had come to settle.
Hyunjae suddenly cleared his throat, gesturing with the hand that wasn’t using his chopsticks. “So as I was saying earlier—I found Juyeonie somewhere—I can’t remember. And then we found Sunwoo. The poor kid was just wandering around like a lost sheep; he was looking for Changmin, so we all went searching for him. And then Younghoon caught up with us—how’d his callback go, by the way?”
You swallowed the bite you had in your mouth before answering. “He did great, as usual. But you’re not allowed to know more than that.”
He sent you a playfully unsatisfied deadpan. “Hmph.”
“Hmph, back at ya,” you teased. You arranged a perfect spoonful of noodles, soup and wonton, carefully blowing on the surface. “So where did you guys end up finding Changmin?”
"In a closet."
You lurched, furiously holding back your snort as you closed your mouth around your bite. Bad. Idea.
Hyunjae didn't bother hiding his giggles as he watched you struggle to chew and swallow your bite of food. "You okay over there?"
With a glare that needed no extended interpretation, you wrestled the food down your throat. "I hate you."
"Hehe, whatever you say," he sang. "He was technically in a dressing room, but same thing. He was miserable, dude. Looked so perturbed."
You scoffed. "Perturbed? What is this? The Fast and the Furious?"
"Hey! Leave my man Vin Diesel alone!"
You cocked a brow at him as you slurped noodles into your mouth. "No." And then you added, "There is literally no reason for there to be so many Fast and Furious movies."
He huffed at you. "You know, that's exactly what people say about all franchises. What would you say if somebody came after Star Wars or Marvel like that, hm?"
"I'd murder them, and you'd help me hide the bodies."
A beat passed. "Touché."
Your lip curled in mild satisfaction. "Okay, so why's the squirrel feeling so down in the dumps? Something about that ex of his?"
Hyunjae motioned vaguely with his free hand. "Ex dance partner. Apparently, it was this whole thing that happened in high school, but I didn't get all the details."
"Ah," you replied. "I'm sure a good cup of coffee can get him to perk up just fine."
"Agreed." Hyunjae's eyes went skyward as a thought occurred to him. You couldn't help but admire the definition in his jawline as he did so. "There was something weird that happened."
"Oh?"
He quirked his mouth to the side and a crease formed in his forehead. "Yeah… we were talking about your play, right? And I was agreeing with Changmin that the whole thing was my favorite because you wrote it—"
Oh. You nodded your head indulgently, expression set in a way that seemed like you were incredibly invested in what he was saying. In reality though, your insides were flaring and you could feel the sweat dripping down the back of your neck.
"—and they just looked at each other? Like that thing you and I do when we know exactly what the other person is thinking, but I didn't get it." Hyunjae wrinkled his nose, reaching for his water. "Wondered what that was about."
You averted your eyes to your bowl of soup, trying to get ahold of yourself. "Yeah," you laughed, and you hoped it didn't sound as nervous as you thought it did, "I have no idea what that's about."
He simply shrugged then. "It's probably just something stupid," Hyunjae mused, then chuckled. "Just my friends for you. Silly geese."
You cleared your throat. "Yeah…silly geese, for sure."
And you were going to have a talk with those silly geese.
EPISODE TWO: LET'S ROCK 'N' ROLL
THIS was not your first rodeo, and it certainly would not be your last. It was approximately two weeks later, the Saturday at the caboose of Spring Break, that you found yourself standing in one of the first few rows of nosebleeds with your hair pulled up and out of your face and a packet copy of your script in hand. The entire acting cast sat in a sort of half circle mass on the stage with their own copies of the script. Today was Script Read-Through Day—as well as an intermittent fitting day.
Thanks to the efforts of your fellow workaholic, drama nerd classmate Kim Hongjoong, a handful of costumes for the entire play had been completed over the length of Spring Break. You'd asked your cast to find time over finals week and Spring Break to get a quick fitting done by Hongjoong and his team, and luckily, all of that had gone smoothly.
Now, it was your turn to lean in.
"Let's get down to business, everyone!" You said with a clap of your hands to capture everyone's attention. Your eyes roamed over the faces of the people who were selected and your heart thundered in excitement. This—this was just one part of the rush you lived for. You didn't bother to suppress your grin. "Thanks for being on time and making it back here; I know I cut your break short, but we're on a very tight schedule. Can we start with going around and introducing ourselves with name, year, major, and role?"
The circlet of introductions began at Cha Eunwoo, the young man in your year who you selected for the role of Kai, the main male lead. Younghoon was cast as Ryan, Kai's best friend, and the guy who was marrying Choi Miyeon's character Lily. Minatozaki Sana was playing Alex, opposite Eunwoo. You had been surprised Younghoon hadn't auditioned specifically for the role of Kai, but you were content that he'd gone for Ryan instead—a simple chemistry reading with the four main leads the week prior had confirmed to you that you'd made all the right choices.
The main cast also included Jung Eunbi, Jung Yerin, Choi San, and Dong Sicheng, another close friend of yours. All in all, you had been incredibly lucky with the ending line up of cast members, and the supporting cast, too.
The read-through carried along smoothly—well, mostly.
“—why, of course, dear Prim! It mainly trickles down to a few… specific details—Yn,” said San as he abruptly broke out of character. Everyone’s heads shot up from their scripts, including yours, as you watched San’s hand air-gesture to an invisible beard on his face. “I’m getting one of those weird old man beards, right?”
There was a murmur of chuckles throughout the group, and you gave him a small smile. “Of course, you are. I asked Hongjoong for the perverted-looking ones, specifically.”
He grinned, nodding. “Nice!” He thought about it, “Wait…”
Younghoon coughed up a laugh. “Shall we continue?”
You inclined your head in affirmation. “Thanks, Hoon. Yes, let’s get back to it. We were at Uncle Lee’s line about ‘specific details’.”
San had been selected to play the character of Uncle Lee, the role quite literally taken from the original Shakespeare play yours was based upon: Much Ado About Nothing. Your thesis play, the biggest project you would ever conduct in your undergraduate years, was called Jasmine. The storyline centered around ex-somethings, Alex and Kai, who were Maid of Honor and Best Man to their best friends Lily and Ryan, respectively. Because of Alex and Kai’s troublesome past, they acted like they hated each other, and Lily schemed to make them finally see eye to eye—as a wedding gift to herself, of course. She also convinced a party of characters to get in on the plan with her. It had all been very fun for you to write, and you imagined that the actors up on this stage now would make it all the better when they brought it to life.
With the read-through completed, you began splitting up groups to begin chemistry exploration readings. While you ushered Sicheng, Eunwoo, Sana, and a couple of the key supporting cast members onto stage, everyone else hopped down and scattered into the nosebleeds so they could get to know their fellow cast members more intimately.
You stood in the second row of the audience in the smack middle, one arm crossed over your stomach and the other propping your script up for yourself. Younghoon settled on one of the seats next to you, a small smile appearing onto his face as he folded his leg over the other. "Why hello Miss Director."
You hummed good-naturedly. "Why hello Mister Groom. Not up to saying hello to your fellow cast members yet?" Usually he was good about introducing himself to everyone; he was quite the charmer.
"I told the lovebirds I would pay attention to their chemistry reading for pointers," he grinned, eyes sparkling beneath the dim lights. "Kai's nervous about it."
"Ah," you voiced, glancing back to the stage where Eunwoo and Sana began interacting with Sicheng and the others on stage. "Awful nice of you, Ryan. Where's your darling bride?"
He gave you a show of wistful glance as he turned his eyes toward the ceiling and propped his cheek against his fist. "My beloved? Well, she is working her magic for the wedding. I told her—" he leaned forward onto his knees then, gesturing with his hands, "—I told her, darling! This is your special day. Anything you want is what I want. You should have seen the smile on her face—a daisy in bloom, Miss Ln.”
An amused expression fixed upon your face, you tipped your imaginary hat to him. “I think you should go find your bride, sir, before her plans get out of hand.”
“Her plans could never get out of hand,” he dismissed with the flick of his wrist.
“So you’re a Yes Man now?” You replied, your brain racking for the one part in the script you had written with this exact dialogue.
You saw the recognition flicker in Younghoon’s eyes. “That’s what love does to you, my friend. It’s not the same as those tally marks you always draw in that notebook,” he replied swiftly, gesturing to your script like it was the notebook that Kai was supposed to keep. “Say, you’ve never told me what those were for.”
Pleased, you arched an eyebrow. “That’s not the line, Hoon.”
You saw the moment he snapped out of character. He smiled, the kind of Younghoon trademark everyone could recognize and become spellbound by. “I don’t have the entire script memorized yet, Yn-ie.”
“I bet you have at least half of it memorized.”
He opened his mouth to remark something when someone hollered, “Oy” from the stage. Both you and Younghoon turned your attention to Eunwoo, who had captured both of your attention. He threw his arms open wide with a teasing grin. “Ryan, you’re supposed to be watching my back, man!”
Sana shot him a scowl. “Hey, if you get a second in this duel, then I get one, too. Lily!”
“As much fun as dueling you and winning would be, Alex, I’m not stuck in ye old days—”
“Your savior has arrived!” Everyone’s heads whirled in the direction of the doors at the back of the auditorium. There was a good handful of people who began filing in through the doors, with a very familiar blond at the helm of all the madness. Reminiscent of that one fiery Elmo meme, your best friend had his arms raised with an ear-splitting grin on his face.
Kevin Moon, one of the people amongst the masses, rolled his eyes as he passed Hyunjae to enter the auditorium. “They’re rehearsing, man.”
Choi Chanhee was swift to follow his friend. “Yeah, Hyunjae,” he teased with a grin.
You fixed your friend with a confused look. “Uhm… Hyunjae, what’s happening?”
Hyunjae jogged down to where you were, leaving his army of… people? behind. “You said you needed volunteers to help you prepare set pieces, right? Well, I told you I’d recruit some people and—” He made a wide, sweeping gesture toward the large group of people now simply crowded at the back of the room, awaiting instructions. Kevin and Chanhee sent you boyish smiles as they waved in greeting. “—I did!”
The lightbulb went off in your head. You couldn’t believe you forgot. “Oh, my god. You actually listened.”
Hyunjae wrinkled his nose. “Hurtful.”
Younghoon laid his head against his arms over the back of his seat with a teasing gleam in his eyes. “Aw, how romantic.”
Hyunjae pointed to his lanky actor friend. “Is he in character?”
“No.”
“Yes.”
Your head shot over to Younghoon just as his eyes met yours. The man shrugged with feigned innocence, standing up to greet Chanhee and Kevin as the other two began slowly leading the army of volunteers down to where you all were setting up. You wondered how on Earth that man’s partner could stand his impish antics.
Hyunjae slipped into the row with you with a wince. “Aish, I can never figure out when he’s in proper character or not.”
“He is,” you blurted. You knew for a fact that Younghoon hadn’t been in character, but Hyunjae didn’t need to know that. Ignorance was bliss, after all. “But that’s besides the point—Jaehyun—”
He flashed you a smile, bringing his hands up to make a jazz hands gesture. “Uh oh, that’s my name-name. I either did really well or screwed up big time.”
You laughed, pressing your free hand to your forehead. “You did really well—”
“Yes!” He cheered while punching the sky. He laughed, bumbling over to you with arms open wide to embrace you. You simply could not escape him. “You’re welcome.”
You lightly punched his chest. “I never said thank you. But thank you. I appreciate it a lot.”
He let you go, lightly patting your head. A warm wave of energy made your nerves feel fuzzy at their synapses. “You don’t have to thank me for doing this for you. By the way, YH!Yn is on her way over; she’s just coming back from her internship.”
Younghoon suddenly, out of nowhere, appeared in the row again. “I heard YH!Yn’s name,” he chirped with a smile that looked like a heart. He waved his phone screen around, as if you could actually read what was on his screen, “Yeah, she said she’s on her way now.”
You nearly melted. “Oh, really? She doesn’t have to if she’s uncomfortable, Hoon. I know big crowds make her anxious—”
“Ah, it’s all good,” he said. “She’s happy to do it, really. It’s not that big of a crowd here, and you’re her friend, Yn. She wants to help out.”
“Speaking of more friends helping out—” cut in Kevin with Chanhee in tow (where did all of them pop up from, goodness), “—Cobie just texted that he, Sangyeon, Juyeon, and JC!Yn are all on their way, too. What’s the plan for all the set pieces then, Yn?”
All eyes went to you, and you felt your heart swell with love, pride—quite literally every happy emotion there was. This whole project had plagued your every waking and unconscious thought for months now. The pressure for this production to be good… there were too many people watching you now. But as you led your friends and your supposed army of volunteers to the backstage area, you felt like there was no way you could fail.
Right?
— ✶
You were cleaning up for the night. Your throat ached and exhaustion wore at your bones from the very extensive day you and everyone else had. Almost the entire cast and volunteer and tech crew members had cleared out by now—your friends had all decided to get dinner together, and you would all head over once you had finished with your business here.
You hiked the strap of your bag over your shoulder with a haggard sigh as you passed beneath the ghost light hanging backstage that signaled that Jihoon was practically done for the night. You caught a glimpse of the man hustling down the corridor and you called out to him.
“Hey, Jihoon-ah! I was hoping I could catch you on your way out.”
Jihoon glanced up from his phone, his slight smile illuminated in the pale blue-light of his phone screen. “Ah, hey, Yn-ie. Good first rehearsal today?”
You fell into step with him as you both maneuvered the dark backstage corridors together. “Yeah, actually. I’m very proud of everyone’s progress so far. I was so stressed about being a couple weeks behind, but… I’m lucky I have such a good group of people here.”
He hummed, nodding. “Definitely. That one—your Hyunjae—”
Your heart stumbled. “Hyunjae? What about him?”
“It’s nothing, but I thought I should mention that I heard a couple girls gossiping earlier—”
You nearly stopped in your tracks, and you felt something crawl beneath your skin. “What’d they say?”
Jihoon glanced over at you, maybe a bit surprised at how sharp your tone was, but he continued on smoothly, “You know that I don’t like involving myself in that petty drama, right? But they were volunteering with the set pieces and stuff, and they were talking shit about him. The usual, like, cocky, arrogant bullshit. Something about wondering how you put up with him all the time.”
You felt your heart drop into the pit of your stomach. “Jesus,” you swore. “Who were they? I’ll deal with them—”
“Don’t worry about it,” he said to you, firmly but not unkindly. The two of you had stopped in the middle of the corridor now, your voices hushed yet harsh still. “Hey, Yn—I took care of it. I don’t tolerate that shit in my theater, you hear? You have a lot on your plate, so I didn’t want you to worry, but I wanted to make sure you knew.”
Breathe, Yn. Your eyes shuddered for a moment. Hyunjae wasn’t always as well-mannered around other people as he was around you and his friends. He was like that for good reason—there were some things in one’s past that shaped who you would become, and unfortunately, that was one thing that you hadn’t been able to protect him from back then. So hearing something like this? You felt awful.
You finally gave Jihoon a nod. “Right, yeah… thanks Jihoon. Really.”
He nodded back. “Of course. Does that happen often?”
You rubbed the place between your eyes where an ache had formed. “No—I mean, he’s just got a front he puts on, but it’s not often. Maybe those girls just witnessed him on one of his bad days. He—” You shook your head.
“I get it; no need to explain it to me,” Jihoon murmured. He gently guided you toward the door out into the main auditorium where Hyunjae said he’d be waiting for you. “He’s a good kid.”
“I know. He’s great.” I love him.
When the two of you emerged into the darkened auditorium, the only light present was the one from Hyunjae’s phone. Your best friend glanced up from his screen, pocketing it away as he stood up to meet you. “Hey, everything okay?”
You and Jihoon exchanged glances. You met Hyunjae’s eyes, your smile small. “Yeah, everything’s fine.”
EPISODE THREE: WE’RE ALL JUST TRYING TO KEEP THE STAGE LIGHTS ON
IT was Monday evening when you determined that you had reached the point in time where everything would only escalate from here. There was something about seeing the backstage crowded with techies that made everything seem ten times more real. Your day had begun an hour or two earlier than the actors’ as you came in to meet Jihoon and Bang Chan about set pieces and creative direction. When your actors had come in, rehearsal commenced by working through the first act of the script and creating a deeper understanding of motivations and purpose.
On Saturday, along with the chemistry explorations, there was also a moment where you had to sit everyone down and give them a better understanding of what this project even came from. (There was a real inspiration to the story, but there was no way you could expose yourself like that, especially in front of Hyunjae.) There had been yet another run through of the script, with some of your actors switching up the way they played their parts just slightly. That same experimentation would continue today.
You were in the box with Chan and a couple of his underclassmen peers as the few of you were discussing the matter of spotlights and the like. It was early in the rehearsal process, but it definitely killed to be early.
You heard a slight commotion as the doors at the back of the auditorium opened.
“You got it covered in here?” You asked Chan, already one foot out of the tech box.
Chan flashed you a dimpled smile and a thumb’s up, and you were on your way out and toward the sounds of newcomers. You could already make out the figures of your friends Park Jihyo and Wen Junhui from where you were running up to them.
“YN!” Jihyo squealed as she rushed to come bury you in a hug.
“Oh my god, thanks for coming, you guys,” you gushed, crushing yourself to her.
Jun scurried over, wrapping his limbs around the two of you, as well. The two of them had quite literally insisted on coming to this rehearsal as your sanity check, which you deeply appreciated. Well that, and the fact that Jihyo was helping you manage the finances for this project, as well as any sponsors who came through to support the play. You had never been good with that stuff, but luckily, your econ-business-major friend was. (Jun was always there for moral support; him being versed in acting also helped, too, with directing when you couldn’t.)
The three of you immediately got to work, and you were finally able to return to your own actors as the lot of you worked through the first couple of scenes of act one.
“What do you suggest we talk about?” Eunwoo asked from stage left where he and Younghoon lingered with their scripts in hand. They were standing opposite the stage from Miyeon and Sana, who were supposed to walk onto the stage from the right like walking into a restaurant. The main focus of the scene was supposed to be Miyeon and Sana, but because Younghoon and Eunwoo were still onstage, they had to act like they were actually doing something even if their microphones wouldn’t be activated.
Younghoon gave a shrug and an easygoing smile. “What do you think Kai and Ryan talk about?”
“Kai feels like the kind of pompous jerk who speaks only in Ralph Waldo Emerson and Sylvia Plath.”
“That could be an interesting dynamic,” Jun chimed in.
You lifted a shoulder in agreement. “I say ‘yes’. Let’s just see what this looks like—Eunwoo, play that; Younghoon, play the exact opposite.”
Younghoon sputtered a laugh, but he saluted, understanding your directions (somehow… it was probably because you had worked with him for a long time over the course of both of your academic careers). “Aye-aye.”
You made a waving motion toward stage right where Miyeon and Sana were poking their heads out from behind the curtains. “Ready? Action.”
It turned out that the overly smart version of Kai was not what the scene needed. After a couple of new directions to Eunwoo about this little thing, you eventually settled on a nice in-between that reminded you awfully of a certain someone…
Lo and behold, you heard the doors at the back of the auditorium open up once more. You didn’t turn your attention away from the scene playing out before you, but you had an inkling of who had entered the sphere of the dramatic.
It wasn’t until the brunch scene had finished, you pursed your lips, nodding. “I like that.”
“I like it, too,” Jihyo said, paired with a nod from Jun.
You flipped through your script, asking for the actors taking part in the next scene—the bar scene—to come to the stage. “Uhm, let’s see… I need all of the main cast, barring Kai and Alex, to the stage. I also need Bartender 1 to come out, as well.” You waved your hand around toward the middle of the stage. “Make a little cult circle or something—yes, Younghoon, you have to stand next to Miyeon, silly goose.”
It was now that you finally turned around to confirm your prediction of who had joined the crowd. Just a few rows up from where you and your friends were sat three eager faces. Presently, it was Hyunjae, Eric, and his girlfriend, the former of which greeted you by raising up what looked like an iced caramel macchiato. God bless.
You hustled up to where they were, making grabby hands at the frost drink. “Thank you,” you sighed, accepting the drink and straw from him.
“Aye! Hyunjae!” Younghoon hollered from the stage. “Where’s my drink?”
Hyunjae cupped his hands around his mouth. “The kid has it!”
“I’m not a kid,” Eric sulked as he attempted to cross his arms over his chest while also not spilling the iced americano he was in possession of.
“That’s right!” EC!Yn mused, then added, “You’re my baby.”
Hyunjae wrinkled his nose at the lovey-dovey young lovers. “Oh, now that was awful, EC!Yn,” he groaned. He nudged your elbow from where you stood next to his seat. “Wasn’t that gross?”
Your brain was filled with caramel and caffeine. “Leave them be, Jae. At least they have someone to be gross with.”
Hyunjae mocked a face of offense, and Eric and his girlfriend slipped past you two in youthful giggles to go deliver Younghoon’s drink to him down at the bottom stage. When the two of you were left alone, Hyunjae pressed his cheek against his fist as he peered up at you. “How’s today been so far?”
You finished your sip, swallowing down the sugary, caffeinated goodness. “It’s been alright so far. I didn’t know you were coming.”
“Well,” he sighed, “I knew you were probably going hours without water, so I thought I’d at least bring you something pleasant.”
You sat down on the floor beside his aisle seat, silently offering him a sip of the drink he had treated you to. “You know me too well. And what do you mean? You did bring me something pleasant.”
Hyunjae took a ginger sip of the drink then pushed the cup back toward you. He grinned, flipping a lock of imaginary hair behind his shoulder. “Ah, you mean me—”
“I meant the kids,” you teased as you smiled around your straw with a look that was hardly innocent.
He deadpanned at you. “Never letting my head stay in the clouds ever, huh, Miss Ln?”
“Someone has to keep you humble.”
A soft laugh fell from his lips as he shook his head, then pressed his lips to his knuckles. “Well I guess if it's gotta be anybody, it should be you. Then again, that Chanhee keeps me on my toes, too."
"Weren't you the one who said he had no ass first?"
He let out a snort. "I only speak the truth."
"That you do," you agreed.
Hyunjae flicked his phone screen on for a second to catch the time and grunted. "Ugh, I have to go meet with my group members for a project in Public Infrastructure."
Your lips curled downward. "It's literally the first day of the quarter—you have a project already?"
He huffed sharply out of his mouth, sending one of his longer bits of bangs flying upward. "That's what I'm saying. Professor is insane this quarter, especially for putting me in this group. He said he picked our groups for us because we 'don't always get to choose in the real world'." He made a face. "Somebody has hurt that man, and we are paying for it. Pretty sure the people in my group don't even like me."
Your chest ached at that, and you leaned your chin onto his arm rest while he settled his head against the back of his chair. "I'm sorry, Jae. I know group projects are hard with strangers, but maybe they'll be cool with you? Are you just a little anxious maybe?"
"Dunno," he mumbled, picking at a stray thread on the red seat. He raked a hand through his hair, shifting. "I'm just dreading it, I guess. I just have that feeling y'know?"
"Yeah, I get that." You bumped your hand against his, mustering up an encouraging smile. "You're gonna be okay, Jae. I believe in you."
Hyunjae collected himself enough to smile back. "I can always count on you, Yn."
"Of course," you said, as easy as breathing air. You exhaled, "What are best friends for?"
— ✶
You found yourself seated in the darkness of the auditorium seats, the ghost light of the stage your only company. The ghost light was a single bulb that hung from mid stage in order to prevent any mishaps or accidents from happening when one had to stumble about in the darkness of the theater. It was a single part of theater superstition, as well as a sign that Jihoon and Chan had gone on their way for the night, leaving you to lock up. You'd been given charge of empty theaters before, and frankly, the peace and quiet was something you needed.
The time was nearing nine o'clock though, and your stomach growled at the thought of going back to your warm townhouse shelter for some pity ramen.
You finally shut the lid of your laptop, slipping it into your bag so you could stretch your aching limbs. You popped a couple joints as you did, then reached for your drained cup of iced caramel macchiato.
The rest of rehearsal had gone reasonably well. You were making progress, and that was the important part. Eric and his girlfriend had left a little before Hyunjae had in order to go get dinner together. Hyunjae had understandably been reluctant to leave, but he basically convinced you to let him call you while he made his way over to his project meet up location. You were directing as he did, but he didn't seem to mind and listened quietly with the occasional humorous comment.
You hoped he was doing okay.
Just as you slung your bag over your shoulder, typing out a fast text to Hyunjae to ask about how it went, your ears picked up the faint sound of creaking wood.
You froze, your head whipping around the very empty theater for the sound.
You heard it again—it was the slow, haunting creeeak, like someone was taking a deliberately drawn-out step. The hand around your phone tightened as you turned your gaze to the stage. The ghost light hung eerily in the now-quiet hall, its amber light creating a circle of light beneath it like a beacon for creatures of the night.
Creeeak… creeeak…
"Jihoon?" You called out. "Chan? Is that you?"
The creaking stopped; a shiver crawled down your spine.
"Is someone there?"
When you were met with silence, you pressed a hand to your forehead, speed-walking up the aisle of the theater and out into the lobby. Swiftly locking all the doors behind you as you made your exit, you figured you were probably just hearing things.
As you deposited your empty cup into the trash bin just outside the theater doors, you received a reply from Hyunjae. The performance hall door thunked closed after you twisted the lock mechanism into place.
With no more than a glance at the dark windows, you turned on your heel and made a beeline for the bus stop.
EPISODE FOUR: IT'S ALWAYS THE DARK AND STORMY NIGHTS
FRIDAY night brought an onslaught of the sky's wrath in the form of a storm. Rehearsal had progressed decently, and while you did appreciate how hard everyone was working, you had to remind yourself that you couldn’t rush the process if you wanted a phenomenal end product. You just needed to have faith in the people you were working with.
Nearly everyone had gone home by now, barring yourself, Jihoon, Chan, and a couple of undergrads they were keeping around to show them the ropes. You were in the backstage area packing up your things to head out for the night. You could hear the voices of your peers echoing slightly through the bowels of the theater, but none of them were too near to your location.
The hairs on the back of your neck suddenly stood up as you reached for a page of script cues that one of the techies had left behind on a stool.
You straightened, your eyes scanning the backstage area. All the lights were on tonight since Jihoon and Chan were still here. The ghost light was not your only companion tonight, and yet…
There had been a feeling creeping up on you this past week… something unsettling like you were being watched. Perhaps it wasn’t you specifically being watched—it was more so that you were never truly alone when you knew no one else was here with you. There was something bothering you about the shadows of the theater lately, and they had almost never been anything but comforting.
You had to visibly suppress your soul from jumping out of your skin when you heard that goddamn wooden creaking sound.
“Yn-ie?”
Your heart did about five cartwheels and a barrel leap as you whirled around to find Chan coming in from the other side of the curtain. He noticed your jumpiness and concern fell over his features. “Hey, you good?”
You usually weren’t so much of a scaredy cat, dear god. You let out a laugh, though it sounded more nervous than you liked. “Yeah—no, yeah, I’m fine. Just a little antsy, is all.” Yeah, that’s it. You slung the strap of your bag over your shoulder and walked over to Chan to bump fists with him in greeting. “You and the others wrapping up?”
Chan’s eyes swept over you and his mouth quirked into an expression that told you he didn’t believe your “I’m fine” bit at all. But he was never one to pry where he believed to be crossing a line. “Not really, actually,” he sighed, cupping the back of his neck above the headset hanging there, as the two of you moved back into the main auditorium together. “We just realized that some of the speakers have been left on for the past week. They seem to keep coming on even though we turn them off; just outdated tech, I guess. But we’re trying to see if we can fix them before considering getting new ones.”
The hammering in your heart subsided for a moment as your brows pinched together and your brain switched into work-mode. “Really? Okay, well, let me know if I can do anything to help—that is weird.”
You eventually said goodnight to everyone left in the performing arts hall as you let yourself out through the front doors. The rain seemed to have subsided from earlier, and the night was left with dark cumulus clouds looming above your head, and rain-soaked streets that smelled heavily of metal and petrichor. A cold, biting wind swept past your face and nipped at your extremities as you pulled your jacket around you tighter.
The walk to the bus stop wasn’t an awfully long one, but…
You stopped.
You swore you just heard a clattering sound from just behind you. Your attention went to a collection of trash cans sitting only a few meters behind you. When no animal revealed itself to be the source of the noise, you clutched your small canister of mace into your fist.
A tingling sensation crawled down your spine, and you turned on your heel to start walking faster toward the bus stop.
There weren’t many street lights posted in this area of campus, but if you could just get—
“YN!”
You nearly screamed when someone grabbed you by the shoulder, and you lifted the can of mace up in between you and the person.
“Shit, Yn. It’s just me!” Hyunjae slapped his palm over yours and shoved the nozzle of the mace can down and out of his vision. He wrestled your body to a stop, anchoring you to reality. “Holy shit, honey. Shhh, calm down. It’s just me.”
You furiously inhaled and exhaled, your chest rising and falling as you pressed a hand to your sternum. “Lee Hyunjae, what is wrong with you?” You growled. Had it been him this whole time?
Hyunjae dared a cheeky smile. “Well, I just saw you from down the street and I thought you saw me, but you kept walking. I guessed you were just in your head tonight, so I thought it’d be fun to surprise you.”
“You don’t grab a girl in the middle of a darkened, abandoned street and yell in her ear to surprise her.” Your eyes were hard as you reprimanded him; he was your best friend, yes, but you nearly had a heart attack right then. Your nerves were so on-edge that you just couldn’t joke with him at this moment.
He winced then. “Ah, when you put it like that…” He pressed his lips together, eyes taking in your tense form. There was something else in your face other than annoyance at his stupidity—something that troubled him. His voice grew soft, his touch even softer, as his hand cupped the back of your shoulder in a warm hold. “Hey, everything okay? I’m really sorry for doing that; it was stupid of me.”
You huffed a sigh and avoided his eyes. “This isn’t the first time I thought someone was watching me,” you confessed lowly, so not even the wind could hear you.
Hyunjae’s eyes widened when you said that, and he was swift to wrap an arm around your shoulders and gather you against him. His gaze surveyed your surroundings and the shadows seemed to dance in his view; his breath hitched. “Let’s get you home,” he murmured then, “I’m parked nearby.”
EPISODE FIVE: THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM
THE next day, Jihyo, Jun, Jacob, and Kevin were seated deep into the nosebleeds within the dim areas of the theater. Straight ahead, you and Hyunjae stood in the first few rows of seats as the actors were doing a run-through of the first act of the play. Hyunjae simply sat in the seat next to you, but you were doing your director thing. It wasn’t out of the ordinary at all to see you two so close, but something had shifted overnight from the last time all of them had seen you and he interact.
“Remind me again why you guys are here so early?” Jihyo’s question was directed toward Jacob and Kevin as she sipped on her morning cup of coffee. Everyone in the row was armed with their own cup of caffeinated brew, too; that was simply what being awake at nine on a Saturday morning called for.
Kevin peered at the other two from around Jacob. “His girlfriend and Chanhee are grocery shopping.”
Jun snorted. “Are they roommates? Why’s Chanhee grocery shopping with JC!Yn? Sounds a bit random.”
“They’re with her roommate and Changmin, too,” Jacob replied with a joking roll of his eyes. “Kevin’s just petty that they’ve never thought to extend the invitation to us.”
“Hey! You always hint at wanting to join them, too. It’s not just me, good sir.”
“I asked once, and when she said no, I never asked again—”
“—he’d only say that because he’s been scorned by love,” Younghoon lamented from the stage, his arm braced along the back of Miyeon’s folding chair. Props were still being finalized between a couple options, but Jun had found a bunch of folding chairs in a closet that you could use for the bar scene. Everyone’s attention moved away from invitation-less friends to friends playing pretend. He made a dramatic gesture, clutching his heart, then straightening with a laugh as he teased his friend who wasn’t in the scene. “I still think it’s stupid that he and Alex never worked out.”
Eunbi’s eyebrows flew up to her hairline as her hand, holding a water bottle that would later be replaced with a drink glass, froze in mid-air. “I’m sorry? This is news to me. Since when did Kai and Alex even have a chance at ‘working out’?”
Miyeon let out a delighted gasp. “Oh, where to begin?”
Yerin piped in with a lazier gesture with her water bottle. “They weren’t always sworn enemies, y'know. Once upon a time, the ‘lovebirds’ were actually lovebirds,” she chuckled at her own joke—or, her character’s joke.
Younghoon explained, "Their parents pretty much pitted them against each other since the end of middle school. They used to be friends, actually, and they were top of their class in practically everything. Except…"
"Academic League?" Eunbi guessed with her brows twisted. "I remember hearing about something like that."
"Yeah, I mean," Miyeon added, "something happened in junior year and it's been like that since."
"What happened in junior year?—"
Jihyo watched the performance with narrowed eyes, her body leaned forward onto her knees. "This sounds awfully familiar."
The three boys turned their heads her way. "What do you mean?"
She shook her head, eyes fluttering. She made a face and cocked her head to the side in thought. "Okay, maybe it's not exactly like what I'm… Jun, you remember when Yn told us about—you know?"
"That she almost confessed to Hyunjae? Ow! I'm sorry!" Jun yelped as Jihyo slapped his shoulder, hard.
Jacob and Kevin exchanged wide-eyed glances. "She almost confessed to Hyunjae? When?"
Jihyo sent Jun another hard glare, to which he sheepishly raised his hands in surrender, before replying, "Yn said offhandedly once that in junior year of high school, she was almost going to confess her feelings to Hyunjae, but then suddenly decided not to."
Kevin leaned his chin onto his fist. "Huh…"
"I don't know how I didn't even notice this before when I read through the script," Jihyo thought aloud. "Alex and Kai are Yn and Hyunjae—just…with a different ending."
All four heads turned to face forward once more, except, their attention zeroed in on you and Hyunjae. YH!Yn had appeared beside you, most likely updating you on the progress of the massive prop project she was working on for the play. You listened to her report intently as Hyunjae sat next to you, his head leaned onto your shoulder as he played some game on his phone. It was far too soft, far too—there was no way you based this all off of your own experience with Hyunjae, right?
In fact, it was possible.
As YH!Yn let you know that she would have to buy a few more PVC pipes from the hardware store, you assured her that she would be reimbursed for those expenses.
“—I know how busy you are—”
YH!Yn smiled sweetly as she cut you off, “Oh, no worries at all! I’m happy to help, as Hoon said before. Plus, this is a lot more fun than my internship; feels like a little creative project I get to nerd out on.”
You grinned at that sentiment. “Ah, I totally get that. Well, I won’t keep you from it any longer. Thanks again.”
YH!Yn gave a brief goodbye, then stood up to head back out to the backstage area where she was putting together the portable fountain she was building (you had given her a list of possible “show-stopping” prop ideas you had and she had picked the fountain). As she left, you watched as she passed by the bottom stage to catch Younghoon’s hand. Something like yearning ached in your chest. One day…
The mass weighing on your opposite shoulder stirred as he let out a noise of surprise. “Huh?”
You glanced over at him as best you could, then flashed Younghoon a thumb’s up to signal him that you were paying attention now. “Huh what?”
Hyunjae sat up straight, his nose scrunched, eyes pinned to his phone screen. “Didn’t you have a friend named Ellie in like, high school?”
Your lips curled into a slight frown at the name; it definitely rang a bell. “I did, what about her?” You asked. The sounds of the dialogue happening on stage faded to glorified background noise as you leaned over to peer at Hyunjae’s phone screen. There, he had a new text thread pulled up with an unknown number introducing herself as Ellie, a “classmate of his from high school”. Not only were you frowning, but your forehead creased, too. It had been ages since you had last been in contact with her. The two of you had been the best of friends before you drifted apart.
To be honest, you had no idea how the two of you drifted apart so easily when you’d been so close to her, but you ended up getting closer to Hyunjae anyway. You chalked it up to differences in interests, but maybe now you could get some answers. Well, that was depending on why she was texting Hyunjae.
“She texted me,” he said, holding the screen between you two. “Recognize the number?”
You could barely remember your own number. Shaking your head, you lifted your gaze back up to the stage where your actors had already moved through most of the scene. “Nope. Might be a new one since it’s been so long. Wonder how she got your phone number.”
Hyunjae blew out a puff of air as he laughed—you saw him begin to type out a response from the corner of your eye. “How do people not get my number at this point,” he grumbled under his breath.
— ✶
It wasn’t until you were seated in the booth of Junhui’s favorite Chinese restaurant on the Ave that he and Jihyo ambushed you with The Question™.
“So when were you going to tell us that the play was about you and Hyunjae?”
Your movements paused, then resumed so you could properly settle into your seat. "At least let me order first."
To their credit, your friends withheld from further questioning until the waiter had come by to take the table's order. When she had gone and was out of earshot, Jihyo pounced, whipping her head over to you and placing a hand on the table between you. You realized suddenly that you were trapped between her and the wall.
"Spill."
Your eyes widened a smidge, intimidated. "How did you guys figure it out? I mean, it's not that obvious, is it?"
Jun shook his head. "Nah, not really. Ji was just on five shots of espresso this morning apparently."
Jihyo sent him a pointed look. "I was not on five shots of espresso…" She murmured, "It was two."
"Okay, five shots, two shots—" Jihyo flapped her hands around as she angled her body toward you. "It was the bar scene and they were all talking about Alex and Kai. And I thought that the bit about junior year sounded really familiar."
"I can't believe you didn't confess to him back then," Jun feigned a disproving shake of his head while clicking his tongue.
You leaned your face against the palm of your hand with an unpretty fwump. "Guys, the play is basically centered around the idea: what if I had confessed to Hyunjae and it went wrong?"
"Just ten times more dramatic," Jun pointed out.
"And," Jihyo added, "their roles are switched. Kai's the one who confesses to Alex in the play, and it's Alex's ex who makes a grand showing at the wedding festivities to cause trouble. Yn doesn't have an ex."
"Uncalled for," you grunted.
Jihyo gave a charmingly beautiful smile that could make all the world fall at her feet. "You love me."
"You're lucky you're cute."
Jun sipped on his water. "I'm right here."
You and Jihyo bursted into giggles, the sound like twinkling bells. Jun sighed softly, but you saw the corners of his lips lift up into a small smile. For a moment, you had forgotten what the topic of this conversation was.
You sobered slightly, your hands reaching for your water glass to take a gulp, then nurse it between your palms. "Have you ever heard the saying that we always try to recreate our first heartbreak in order to rewrite how it ends?"
Jihyo and Jun quieted. They peered at you with eyes that could peer straight into your soul if you let them. That was why you couldn't exactly meet their eyes as you tried to articulate your thoughts behind writing this whole mess. "I mean," you pursed your lips, "it wasn't a heartbreak; it was never a heartbreak. My heart hadn't been broken because how could it be broken if I never even let it. You know?"
"That's not how a lot of hearts are broken, Yn," Jun murmured with a sincere depth to his dark brown eyes. There was something so soulful about them. "Most are broken in silence."
You huffed slightly. "That was a great line."
"I know—"
"Ahem," Jihyo said, reigning the both of you drama geeks back into the realm of real talk. She leaned over to wrap her arms around you, her head resting on top of your own. "So you wrote this… to conquer your fears? To comprehend your feelings?"
"To imagine, to wish, to dream," you added. It was quite sad, really. You couldn't quite think of writing anything else when the time had come to start drafting your thesis. "We write what we know best."
"I thought Hyunjae was basically there throughout this whole process," Jun said, his elbows resting on top of the table as he gestured vaguely. "How has he not figured out that Alex is him?"
You gave a shrug. You couldn't imagine how he hadn't yet figured it out, but it wasn't exactly the most obvious thing. You would soon rather go missing than Hyunjae ever figuring out the truth behind the play's inspiration. Whenever he asked you, it was always "I was so inspired by Kenneth Branuagh and Emma Thompson's rendition of the play" and "I wanted to spice up an old, timeless play and give it a kick of Today". He believed that you were writing a play based solely upon the themes of childhood manipulation, academic pressure, and miscommunication. And you were—just not only those things.
Your thesis would have never been accepted if you'd only presented a skeleton of a play about your nonexistent love life. All of the additions and embellishments to the story had come easy as you pieced together the plotline. But the two main characters had never changed.
With that now settled, the food arrived at your table. (What a brilliantly timed, cosmic coincidence!) You and your friends thought it best to move onto other topics of conversation. Somehow, you had reached the topic of your recent week of weird feelings. Not just about Hyunjae, but about the strange feeling of constantly not being alone. You'd even explained the entire debacle from last night, with Hyunjae scaring you then rushing you home.
Jihyo and Jun both replied appropriately: "Girl, what the fuck?"
You brushed it off with a nonchalance that was not convincing. (Then again, you were never an actress yourself.)
The rest of dinner progressed relatively smoothly, and when the check had come and gone, you wanted to offer a mint to your friends.
"—shit," you swore as you dug around in your bag. When your hand came up empty-handed, you brushed that same hand through your hair. "I left my Altoids in the theater."
Jihyo finished signing her bill, tucking her card away. "Oh? Well, let's go get them."
Jun bobbed his head as he shouldered his coat on. "Yeah, it's no problem, Yn-ie."
"Really? You guys don't have to; they're just min—"
"Nonsense!" Jihyo chirped. She stood up and out of the booth, giving you the space to slip out after her. She then linked your arm with hers, then hooked her other with Jun's. "Power in numbers, my love."
You could do nothing but agree—wholeheartedly. The way your heart rate slowed when she insisted that she and Jun would accompany you showed just how grateful you were. You probably wouldn't have even gone to retrieve them tonight, but waited until Monday instead. They were just mints, after all, but you were appreciative nonetheless. Even for a small item, they would be by your side.
The journey back to the theater was a brief one as Jun drove the three of you back to the performing arts center and pulled into the space right by the stairs up to the hall. You recalled leaving them on one of the dressing room tables in the back corridors, so you used your student ID to buzz into the back hallway of the performing arts building.
You and your friends' voices hushed as you all crept into the dark, abandoned building. When the door closed behind you all, you turned your phone flashlight on to guide your way toward the dressing rooms.
"It should be in one of these rooms," you told your friends as you entered the hallway of doors. You located a familiar number and pushed into the room, swiftly retrieving the teal-colored metal box of minty sweets on the vanity table.
The door closed softly when you slipped out.
"Hey, how's YH!Yn's fountain project coming along?" Jun asked as the three of you began to make your way back toward the back door.
"Oh yeah!" Jihyo perked up. "How's that going? She's so badass for that."
"Isn't she?" You gushed. "Do you guys wanna see her progress?"
There was an obvious answer to that, and the three of you made a hard one hundred eighty degree turn, swerving back down the corridor from which you had just come from. Your conspiratorial giggles echoed within the rafters and bowels of the theater, as if you were pixies from A Midsummer Night's Dream, frolicking through the forest in which they dwelled.
When you reached the vicinity of the backstage area, your footsteps faltered.
It was still dark.
You frowned, slowly stepping into the backstage area.
"Yn? What's wrong?"
Jun said it before you could, "Huh. The ghost light's not on."
Indeed, the bulb that was supposed to be on when no light was, was pitch black. A cool breeze drifted down your spine, making the hairs on the back of your neck and your arms stand up.
"Could Jihoon or Chan have forgotten on their way out?"
"You know Jihoon's not one to forget."
You drifted away from your friends as you slowly stepped into the backstage area. Your flashlight shone toward the walls first as you aimed to make your way toward the lights panel. It would be an easy fix—
Your heart dropped clean into the pit of your stomach.
The light of your flashlight illuminated the absolute chaos.
Setting and backdrop pieces that had been painted by volunteers, articles of clothing collected for people's costumes, scripts left behind torn out of their staples—all of it was flung about and scattered over the backstage floor. It was like a tornado had swept through the area, and you knew your friends were seeing what you were seeing now.
You held your breath for so long you were pretty sure you were imagining the hands shaking you.
Somebody had come in and took their rage out on your play. But who, and more importantly, why?
EPISODE SIX: PHANTOM OF THE PERFORMING ARTS HALL
"WHAT'S up with the ghost light anyway?"
There was a group of you gathered by the stage of the performing arts hall, the house lights having been turned on after you'd made a call to Jihoon and campus security. Along with Jihoon and campus security, however, Hyunjae, Juyeon, Eric, and Younghoon had also appeared. You had shot Hyunjae a text about what had happened and he'd rushed over with his friends—you felt awful about pulling them away from whatever they were doing, but Hyunjae didn't say anything about it.
You sat on the edge of the stage next to Jihyo with Jun and Hyunjae standing by you both on the floor of the auditorium. Well, Hyunjae stood in front of you and you leaned your chin on top of his beanie-covered head while the lot of you waited for whatever security pulled up from the limited amount of cameras. Jihoon had disappeared somewhere to make a call—you would hear from him, too, soon.
The question had been posed by Juyeon, who sat next to Eric and Younghoon in the first row of nosebleeds.
Jun dragged a hand down the side of his face, then rubbed his mouth. "Ah, it's uhm, old theater superstition," he replied. "Usually, backstage crew leaves the ghost light on so anybody coming in doesn't trip on anything or accidentally get hurt or, y'know—break anything."
"It couldn't have just gone out because of the power then?" Hyunjae asked.
Younghoon shook his head. "Usually it runs on the same electricity that every other light runs on. I've never been in a theater where the ghost light just randomly goes out, and there weren't any power outages today either."
"The problem isn't even about the ghost light," you said. Everyone's eyes flickered over to you and Hyunjae. Hyunjae patted one of the legs you had on either side of his upper body as a means of consolation or comfort. "It's about the props and costumes. We're just lucky that they were just scattered and not properly damaged. We would've been set back another week at least."
Eric perked up. "Maybe it's the ghost of Shakespeare haunting the hall!"
A snort fell from your lips as you mused, "Shakespeare in the park?"
Hyunjae cleared his throat as he prepared his best rendition of the Iron Man line: "Doth mother know you weareth her drapes?"
As the two of you shared a giggle and fistbump, the other remaining members of your party sent you strange, confused looks.
Younghoon gave an eye roll. "Oh dear god, you two really are meant for each other."
You caught Jun and Jihyo whip their heads toward you, but before anything else could be said, Jihoon was hustling back into the auditorium from the lobby doors in the back. He brushed the hair out of his eyes as he jogged over to where all of you were gathered, those signature bags under his eyes prominently featured. Oh, you definitely felt terrible.
"What'd they say, Jihoon?" Jihyo asked first.
Jihoon tucked his hands into his pockets as he joined the loose cult circle. "Security found that the locks on the front of the hall were picked open, so they wouldn't have gotten a record of somebody's card being used. Cams picked up someone dressed in black, but they knew where the camera would have gotten a clear shot of them. But because there wasn't anything officially damaged, there isn't much legal action we can take."
Juyeon offered quietly, "Breaking and entering."
Jihoon gestured to him. "Right. Breaking and entering, but that's about it." He pinched the bridge of his nose between his eyes. "It wasn't just a prank or whatever. At least, I don't think so. What do you think, Yn?"
You swallowed, straightening slightly. "I don't think so either. I mean, I don't think any drunk pranksters would go through the trouble of picking open a lock. Even a sober one."
"Maybe a spiteful classmate," Jun suggested with a meager shrug. "Some people are ruthless."
"If there isn't much we can do, or much security is willing to do," you muttered, "then we should call it a night. We just have to take pains to lock everything up every rehearsal now."
Jihoon nodded sharply. "Right. Pains, but necessary ones."
"I'm sorry this happened to you," Eric frowned. A murmur of agreement echoed from everyone else in the group.
You pursed your lips. "It's okay, I—it's not okay, obviously, but I'm glad no one's hard work was properly destroyed. That's all that matters." Even if your nerves were a little shaken. Who could have done this?
The remainder of your time spent in the theater was picking everything up and putting them in their rightful places. By the time the group of you had finished locking everything up, the night had slipped away into its proper depths. Everyone was ready to get the hell out of here and go home to their beds, and Jihoon was certain to show you the ghost light being turned and sustaining for at least a couple minutes before the two of you were the last out.
Juyeon, Eric, Younghoon, and Jihoon said their goodnights and goodbyes, already departing their separate ways to go home. You lifted your head up to find where Jihyo and Jun were waiting for you when you saw Hyunjae standing closer to the entryway of the hall. He gave you a sleepy smile, opening up his arms for you to walk right into.
"Tired?" He chuckled, the sound creating a soft vibration in his chest as you shoved your face into his pretty-smelling sweater.
"Mm," you grunted. "You didn't go home with Younghoon?"
"Nah. I wanna go home with you."
In any other context, in any other situation, that would have meant something completely different. You swallowed, wrapping your arms around his frame. With a nod, you screwed your eyes shut and swept away those wistful thoughts. "Okay, fine."
You didn't know why you kept doing this to yourself. But he was your best friend, and tonight was… a lot. A friendly sleepover was something you needed—at least, that was what you were telling yourself.
— ✶
Being the oh-so courteous guest he was (especially since he practically invited himself over), Hyunjae let you take the shower first. You shared a townhouse a bus ride away from the university campus with two others whom you knew from rooming with them your first year of college. You had lucked out with the random roommate assignments that year, and the three of you weren't the closest nor best of friends, but you found great housemates in each other, which was just as valuable.
You had your own room and ensuite up on the topmost floor, so you and Hyunjae had a bit of privacy and wouldn't bother your friends below. You had finished with your shower a bit ago, so you were settled on your bed, flipping through emails and ensuring no important ones had ended up in the spam folder.
When you heard the door open from the bathroom, you glanced up, but returned your gaze back to this one email about a sponsorship that needed to be added to the playbill later.
"I accidentally grabbed the wrong shirt."
You hummed in question as you quickly forwarded the email to Jihyo, then looked up. A laugh sputtered out of your mouth as you took in Hyunjae taking up the space of your doorway. He was in a pair of his own sweatpants that he often left here, but instead of one of his t-shirts, he must have accidentally grabbed one of your tops. It was a Hello Kitty one you'd found in the back of your closet awhile ago, and fit you pretty nicely, so it looked strained on Hyunjae.
You flopped onto the bed, rolling around in your own laughter. "Jae!—your tits don't fit in that, honey."
Hyunjae's mouth stretched into a grin, his tongue darting out for a second. His dirty blond hair, damp and curly, hung slightly in his eyes over his forehead. "Oh, shut up."
To your detriment (you deserved this, you really did), he then smiled (more like, smirked) as he casually lifted the top over his head.
Your eyes widened just as your entire body lit up on fire. "Hey, woah there! Dude!" You jokingly covered your eyes—your whole face—with your hands as he flicked the shirt off, straightened it out, then stalked over to your closet to swap tops.
Hyunjae rolled his eyes as he ripped another shirt from a hanger and came to take a seat on the edge of the bed. "You've seen me shirtless before, Yn. Calm down."
No. How could you just calm down—? It was nearly impossible when you saw the way the muscles in his back rippled as he yanked the new, white T-shirt over his head. With muted sadness, you watched as the toned muscle on his stomach disappeared beneath the fabric.
Damn.
"You're drooling."
Your eyes darted up to where he was grinning down at his phone screen now, only looking at you from his periphery where you were still lying on the bed.
You huffed, rising onto your knees and hoping your embarrassment wasn't plain as day. But you subtly swiped your thumb across your lower lip to make sure you weren't actually drooling. This is your best friend, Yn; control yourself. "Loser."
"Child."
"Chicken."
"Weirdo."
"Nerd!" You shot back, making him laugh as you draped yourself over his back and tucked his head under your chin. His wet, cold hair tickled your skin, but it was a welcome sensation.
You peered down at his phone with him from your perch. "Who's that?" You asked as he opened up a new text notification from a new number.
You were scanning the message the sender had texted while Hyunjae huffed. "Another of your suitors, milady," he drawled sarcastically.
The message said something like "would she be interested?", the "she" referring to you.
Hyunjae typed out: In you? Probably not.
You let out a gasp, hitting him playfully on the (muscle of his) shoulder. "Hyunjae!"
He snickered, exiting out of the text chain, then deleting the number. "What? I'm just being honest. I feel like every dude who's interested in you goes through me to ask and it's so lame."
You absentmindedly watched as he opened up Instagram and started brainlessly doom-scrolling. "Maybe it's 'cause you've so clearly friendzoned me," you muttered incoherently under your breath.
"Huh? What was that?"
"Maybe it's 'cause they see you as the gatekeeper," you amended, leaving him to climb off your bed and step into the bathroom to prepare your toothbrush for use.
You could hear the incredulity in his voice. "Gatekeeper? Pfft, no way. They're all just cowards; they don't deserve you if they can't ask you out to your face." After a second, he added, "Hey, I don't gatekeep you!"
You made a face at yourself in the mirror as you brushed your teeth. "Uh-huh."
"That's not reassuring, Yn-ie."
You poked your head out of the bathroom and made eye contact with where he had rearranged his position so he sat up against the headboard. "I was just agreeing with you," you teased, then retreated back into the bathroom to finish up your night routine.
"No, you weren't, you menace."
You flicked the lights in the bathroom and bedroom off and rolled onto the bed next to him. The two of you laid facing each other in the dark, your bodies kept to your own sides of the bed and blanket. You both were propped onto your sides, one arm tucked beneath your head.
"I don't gatekeep you," he said into the silence, his voice lowering to match the volume of darkness. He poked your cheek with a finger, as if he could stamp the declaration there.
You gave a small smile. "Okay, Jae." A thought suddenly occurred to you as you broke your stare-down to twist around and grab your phone from the nightstand to see if Jihyo and Jun had said something to the group chat. "Oh, by the way, did you ever figure out what Ellie wanted?"
Hyunjae shifted so he was on his back now, one hand still braced behind his head and the other resting on his stomach—but his eyes still watched you. "Something about a random high school project from senior year. She couldn't find the file for it and wanted to draw inspiration from it or something."
"I didn't know you had a project with her in senior year," you said offhandedly, shutting your phone off and replacing it onto the nightstand. You sighed, slipping further beneath the covers and closer to Hyunjae.
He drew you close, tucking you beneath his chin this time. "Yeah, it wasn't really important. Nothing to worry about."
"I wasn't worrying."
You could already feel yourself drifting off into dreamland, the exhaustion in your eyes making your eyelids close like valance curtains at the very front, lowering to mask the backstage magic from the audience. Except, the magic were your thoughts rocketing into the realm of the fictional. For a split second, you thought about somebody being in your position with your best friend one day. Would it hurt to think about then as much as it did now?
You couldn't exactly think about that future right now. Hyunjae, you liked to think, was far from letting anyone new into his carefully-maintained walls. He had been hurt by people before, and you'd be damned if you didn't protect him from that ever happening again.
You thought Hyunjae had fallen asleep until you felt his thumb brush against the back of your shoulder. "When have I ever friend-zoned you?"
Your heart stuttered in your chest for a moment, but it wasn't enough to wake you up completely. As you drifted off fully, you convinced yourself that you had imagined him saying that. You were both awfully tired, anyway.
EPISODE SEVEN: OH SHIT, WAS MY MIC ON?
TWO whirlwind weeks had flown by. You could hardly even soak in the moments of this last undergraduate project before it all began to blur together. The only ways you were able to properly tell time were crossing out calendar dates and—
“Oh my god, oh my god! Get it out, get it out!”
You, along with everyone present in the main auditorium of the performing arts hall, came to a screeching halt as a flurry of squeals erupted from somewhere deep backstage. You and the conductor of the pit orchestra exchanged concerned expressions before you were making a beeline for the fastest access point backstage. Younghoon and Eunwoo were swift to accompany you, and though you had a sinking feeling you knew what this was, you held your grimace for when you confirmed your suspicions.
Over the past couple of weeks, the feeling of being watched had not faded from the back of your mind. You tried to adjust rehearsal schedules so that they were a little earlier in the evening, but people had lives and you simply could not inconvenience them based on someone trying to scare you. Plus, with the spring season flying in swiftly, the sun retired a lot later, which gave you some peace of mind, at least.
But over that same time, the person meddling with your show had ceased to cease. One day it was sky blue fabric strewn all over the main stage; another day it was peacock feathers left in the projection box; there were cables missing from tech, headsets changed to radio channels. Somebody was clearly pulling out all the stops to ensure that this theater and production was full of old theater superstitions and bad luck, either to scare you or the people you were working with (or both), and frankly—it was working. To an extent.
You stormed into the back corridor of the performing arts hall, the supporting cast and tech crew all sprinkled about the hallway, anxiously watching you and your friends pass by them toward one of the larger dressing rooms.
“What is going on?” You demanded as you entered the dressing room. There was a small gathering of people gawking at something—the dressing room vanity mirror. The breath left your lungs at the sight.
The surface of the mirror was vandalized, the infamous word “Macbeth” scrawled all over its reflective plane in red lipstick. Some of the product had begun to melt from the heat of the lightbulbs around the mirror and dripped down the mirror like blood. It would have been a comical prank if this wasn’t a theater. You felt a stiff, cool breeze run across your skin.
Somebody was really trying to fuck you over, huh.
You shoved down a swallow. “Somebody get me some Windex,” you croaked. When nobody moved, you repeated yourself, forcing a bit more strength into your voice.
Chan appeared in the room, his own eyes pinned to the subject matter upon the mirror, as he handed you a bottle of Windex and an old rag.
You snatched it out of his hands with a “thank you”, then marched up to the mirror. With shaky hands, you began scrubbing away at the word written over and over on the mirror. You heard Chan corral everyone out of the dressing room and back to their original activities. All your senses had dulled by now, and you felt Younghoon gently pry the rag from your hands so he could reach the spaces that you couldn’t.
“Who is doing this?” You voiced to the now sparsely populated dressing room. You sat in one of the dressing room chairs with your hand pressed to your forehead with Younghoon, Chan, and Jihoon present. Eunwoo had gone out to calm people down, but you knew that this was going to draw a line for some people. It was a known superstition not to utter the name of the notorious Scottish Play in a theater, and it had just been named about a couple dozen times on the mirror behind you.
Your friends could offer no suggestions.
Your pride took an even bigger hit when you decided to cut the remainder of rehearsal for the day; you were certain there were at least a handful of people who were scandalized by what just happened.
“Are you okay, though?” Younghoon asked you for the third time as the two of you watched people leave the performing arts hall from the base of the nosebleeds. “I know that you’re not usually so… swayed by superstition.”
You could only give a stiff shrug. “I’m not,” you agreed, “but this is going to be the biggest project and production of my undergrad career. I don’t—I can’t take any chances.” You smoothed a hand over one half of your face. “God, I’m just tired, Hoon. I’m so stressed, and cutting rehearsal short today—we’re gonna be set back another day—”
“Hey,” he soothed, grasping you by the shoulders so you would look him in the eye. He offered a kind smile, “You’re doing great, Yn. I can’t imagine the pressure you’re under right now for this to go perfectly, but I think you have to have a little faith in all of us, including yourself. One rehearsal is not going to make a difference in the long run. We’ve got a lot of talented, hard-working people who will sleep this mishap off and come right back to make up for lost time.”
He squeezed your shoulder. “And whoever’s been doing this? They’ll get their due karma.”
You let his words soak into your brain. You needed this; you needed those words said to you. With a nod, you and Younghoon deigned to head out with everyone else. Jihoon and Chan were swift to shut the theater down for the evening, as well.
As you and Younghoon stepped out into the early evening, the sky still glowed a buttery yellow swirled in purpley-blue. There was another breeze wafting by, but instead of the chills you got before, it was slightly warmer and made you inhale deeply. The air out here made your lungs less constricted, you realized, and maybe you’d been stuck in that theater for too long lately. This would be good for you, as well as everyone else.
“I think me and some of the cast are gonna get together to go over some scenes at the grove,” said Younghoon as he peered down at his phone screen. “Wanna come with?”
You brushed a strand of hair from your face, a decision coming to surface. “Nah, I think I’m gonna take a walk. Get some fresh air.”
Younghoon passed you a brilliant-sort of smile that gleamed in the golden hour light. “Alrighty, director. Sounds good. Have a good night then, Yn-ie.”
“Yeah, you too. Thanks for today, Hoon.”
You and Younghoon parted ways there, and while he traveled down the stairs toward east campus, you traveled northward toward the quad. The quad, a place most known for the cherry blossom trees that bloomed in the early spring, was no doubt full of people taking late afternoon strolls in the temperate spring climate. It was the perfect environment for you to relax and let some of the stress and pressure fade from your pulsing temples.
There were no longer cherry blossom flowers blooming upon the dark branches, but healthy, dark green leaves. Even if they were shades of pink, they were still beautiful nonetheless.
After making a full loop around the quad lawn’s perimeter, you made a detour down one of the side pathways that were lined in trees that yawned toward its partner on the other side of the pathway. It was noticeably quieter and less populated here, and for once, you actually didn’t feel like you were being watched.
You were walking for only a few minutes in the serenity when you saw a pair of people standing in a clearing of trees just to your two o'clock. You stopped, a familiar blond haired best friend catching your eyes.
"What the fuck is your problem?" Was what you heard from Hyunjae, and you almost marched right up to them to defend him.
That was, until you saw the girl's face.
You hadn't recognized her at first because she had her back facing you and she had changed her hair. But it wasn't difficult to recognize your old friend, Ellie, the one who Hyunjae said had contacted her. Your eyebrows furrowed in utter confusion. Why were they together right now? You thought Hyunjae had said weeks ago that she was just trying to get ahold of an old project they'd done together in high school.
Ellie placed her hands on her hips, her facial expression stony and unreadable. "Can you think rationally for a second and listen to me all the way through? That's what you agreed to when you said you'd meet me."
Huh?
You pressed your side against the nearest tree trunk, your heart thundering your eardrums.
When Hyunjae said nothing, Ellie continued, exhaling sharply, "Okay. As I was saying earlier, do you even know what the play's about? …No. Look at you; can't you see? You don't even know what it's really about."
"Of course, I know what it's about," Hyunjae sneered. "It's about how academic pressure and miscommunication can ruin relationships—"
Ellie laughed, the sound mirthful, and yet carried an air of malice that made your skin crawl. This wasn't the Ellie you remembered… "That's funny, oh my god! You really don't know what it's about."
"What are you going on about?"
"I think you should ask her," she said with a smile. You peered around the tree, feeling utterly stupid like one of those characters from a teen drama eavesdropping on their lover and their nemesis. "Ask her, Hyunjae. I'm sure she'll tell you what it's really about when you mention that I told you she st—"
"Yn?"
Oh, for fuck's sake. You nearly jumped out of your skin at the sound of Jihyo's voice from behind you. You quickly grabbed her and dragged her down behind the tree trunk next to you. When she sent you a look that told you she thought you were completely deranged, you pressed a finger to your lips.
She indulged you, thank god, and followed your lead as you crept around the tree trunk again.
"It's cute that you have so much trust in her," was what you heard Ellie say next.
Jihyo squinted as she tried to identify the girl. "Who the fuck…?"
You kept your eyes glued to the pair before you, but muttered to Jihyo quickly, "That's Ellie. Old friend of mine from high school, but we drifted apart. Haven't talked to her since."
"She and Hyunjae are friends?"
"No, I have no clue what's going on." Yet, your stomach twisted and churned and you felt bile crawl up the length of your throat.
A muscle feathered in Hyunjae's jaw, but he couldn't seem to get himself to say something.
Ellie looked upon him pitifully. "One day, she'll drop you, too—when she finds someone better. That's what she did to me, y'know? I don't know why she went to you, though. You are awful. I've heard all the stories."
You saw red.
This time, Jihyo had to grab a fist full of your shirt and yank you down next to her to prevent you from clawing Ellie's vocal chords clean out of her throat. Because you would have.
Anything—you would've done anything to never see the flash of shame, hurt, and anger across Hyunjae's face when she said that. It was like she'd slapped him, clean and hard. Your chest ached as you watched his hand tighten into a fist at his side.
"You don't know anything about me," he said icily.
And it was over all too soon. Ellie said something to Hyunjae, but it was too quiet to hear. When Ellie left her own way, Hyunjae stalked off in a different direction, leaving you and Jihyo where the two of you remained hunched behind the tree.
You made to get up, but Jihyo pulled you back down again. "Ji, I have to go make sure he's okay—"
"I know you do," she told you firmly while keeping you seated down next to her. "But you're not in the right headspace, and neither is he. You need to breathe, especially after today and whatever the hell that was."
When you sent her a questionable look, she explained, "I bumped into Sana on my way to the performing arts center and she told me what happened. Then Younghoon told me you went on a walk and I just tracked your phone to here."
Your jaw dropped. "You tracked my—"
"Shhh," she shushed you, pressing a finger against your lips. "That's besides the point! Are you okay, Yn? For real."
You leaned back onto your palms, a frown coming up to your lips. "Everyone keeps asking me that lately."
"It's a valid question."
That was fair, you supposed. You released a sigh. "I mean… not really? I'm just stressed, and I don't even know what to think or how to comprehend what we just witnessed." Your brain was buzzing with every one of Ellie's biting words. What had she meant by all of that? She sounded so bitter, so malicious… What had happened?
Jihyo pressed her lips together, sitting down properly onto the grass. "What was that? Did you and Ellie end on bad terms?"
Your brows creased together and you absentmindedly scratched your jaw. "No," you murmured. "Not that I remember. It was just like we drifted apart over time. At least, that's how I remember it. I dunno."
You blew out another breath of air. Ellie and you had both been really good at what you did—theater, writing, all of the works. You two were a dynamic duo; if people now claimed you were a prodigy, then Ellie was your twin. In a way, you could probably say that your characters from the play you wrote almost mimicked yours and Ellie's creative abilities and technical prowess, but just in different spheres. While the love story was based upon you and Hyunjae, the foundation had been from you and Ellie.
But it eventually faded, that friendship. You figured that was just how things worked, as unfortunate as it was. You both moved on, and you found Hyunjae.
You relayed all of this to Jihyo, your friend listening to your words intently.
"—but I've never carried any ill will toward her," you reiterated at the end of your spiel. "I truly haven't heard from her since and she hasn't reached out either. I don't know what could have caused her to tell Hyunjae all of that."
Jihyo pressed her mouth to her knuckles as a thoughtful frown graced her porcelain features. "Hm, yeah. It's curious, for sure. What were they saying before I got here?"
You gnawed on your top lip. "She kept insisting that he didn't know what the play was really about and that he should ask me."
"Huh."
"I know right." You carded a hand through your hair. "I'm screwed."
"Only if he actually works up the guts to ask," she countered. "Though, I think you should beat him to it."
You cocked your head to the side in question. "What do you mean?"
She lifted her shoulders in a half-hearted shrug. "Y'know—like you have to confront him about meeting with Ellie. You can't keep this from him; I know you."
Yeah, she was right. It would eat at you if you let that guilt swirl in your stomach. Plus, all of those things Ellie had said to him… you hoped he was okay. Dear god, you hoped he was okay.
(But the question now, you supposed, was who would bring it up first?)
EPISODE EIGHT: EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT SHE'S THE BO-BO-BO-BOSS
FUNNY story: it took a week before you and Hyunjae could even have a proper conversation, in person.
With the quarter well underway, there was little to no time to stop and smell the flowers anymore. This had now become a race toward graduation, meaning that everyone was focused on their own problems. The “pranks” had dulled down, but they were, by no means, completely gone. There were always the occasional cord missing, or that dreaded creaking noise in the wings on late nights.
You’d grown used to it by this point, and so had your peers, luckily. The conversation between Ellie and Hyunjae sat in the back of your mind at all times. You always knew it was there, but you had so many things to worry about. Act two was just about wrapping up though, and so, play progress was chugging along well on schedule.
You really did have nothing to worry about—maybe it had all been jitters. Maybe it would all just finally go smoothly.
Friday night rehearsal was a little slower tonight since everyone had been here since noon. You’d all practically spent the entire day together, having lunch first, then diving into proper rehearsal. It had been a rehearsal full of laughs and a good time, and by the time Hyunjae stepped foot into the performing arts hall, you felt that you could take on anything. Even the conversation that needed to take place.
“Hey, you said you wanted to talk to me about something?” He said as the two of you stepped into the privacy of the sound booth, the tails of laughter still lingering in the air from the scene he had come into. You were currently rehearsing the directions of the first scene of act three, where Younghoon’s character was going through a full-on “groom-zilla” mode while Eunwoo’s character couldn’t stop talking about Sana’s character. It had been a full one-eighty character swap between the two friends.
You licked your lips, trying to press your smile down a little. “Oh, yeah. I was taking a walk, like, a week ago—and I saw you and Ellie talking.” You figured it would be better to just air it out right away; there was no need to beat around the bush. You lowered yourself onto the edge of one of the tables inside the booth, the air turning stuffy from the insulation inside the box. Crossing your arms loosely over your front, you watched as Hyunjae’s mood shifted, his body shuffling as he sought a comfortable position against the wall by the door.
Hyunjae cleared his throat, head ducking as his hand cupped the back of his neck. “Oh, really? You saw that?”
“I heard what she said to you—”
His head whipped up at that.
“—and I can’t believe she said that,” you said, those dagger-sharp words echoing in your mind from what Ellie had said to him about his own character. “Are you… are you okay?”
Hyunjae’s eyes widened a millimeter. “Am—am I okay?” He stammered.
“Yeah, I mean, she said that you were awful and it was…” You shook your head with a haggard sigh. “I’m sorry she said all that to you.”
“Thanks,” he exhaled, peering over at you through his eyelashes. He looked so small for once. “I—” He huffed air out from his nostrils, leaning his head back against the wall as he struggled to find the words he wanted to say. “Is that all you heard though?”
No, I also heard her insist you ask me what the play is about. You blinked, your own voice seemingly trapped in your throat. Why couldn’t you just own up to it?
But he must have taken your silence as you saying that you hadn’t heard anything else, so he gathered his wits to ask you, “Yn, what’s the play really about?”
The breath left your lungs. “You know what it’s about, Jae. You were there while I wrote it.” Please don’t make me say it. Please don’t make me say it. Because a part of you knew that if he pushed, you would give. You would tell him because… how could you not? If he wanted you to be honest with him, then… oh god, would you really? Would you risk this little secret of yours and ruin a friendship? Either way—it could go either way.
His tongue darted out for a moment as he carded a hand through his hair; he took a couple steps toward you. “I know, Yn. But—Ellie kept on insisting that I ask you what the real idea behind the play is. And she—and she,” he laughed, the sound disbelieving, “she said that you stole the idea from her, which is crazy! I know it’s crazy, because I watched you labor over this thing for months.”
She what? All thoughts except for one left your brain at that moment: why in the world would Ellie tell Hyunjae that you stole the idea for Jasmine from her? You didn’t remember ever seeing this kind of work from her before. “I didn’t steal anything from her.”
“I know,” he replied again, placating you. He now stood right in front of you, but your eyes raced back and forth about a mile a minute as you mentally went through the things you remember ever writing with her. You couldn’t remember; you couldn’t think. Why would she say that? “So I just wanted to ask,” he said slowly, his words drawn out as he leaned down slightly so you would look him in the eyes, “what is the play really about? The real meaning.”
There were pros and cons to telling him. On the one hand, you could spew the same surface-level bullshit that you usually did, but you had a feeling that one wouldn’t work this time. On the other hand, you could tell him—the truth. That was the worst pill to swallow. It could end in utter catastrophe or it could end in your wildest dreams. But what if, when he didn’t feel the same about you, had to let you down easy and your friendship would never be the same ever again? You couldn’t bear losing him, you just couldn’t. You loved Hyunjae…
“Yn, you’re scaring me,” he said with an anxious laugh.
You met his eyes then. “You don’t trust me?” You blurted before you could stop yourself. Those words, that tone… it sounded to you like he really was starting to believe what Ellie told him.
Something flashed across his face, and he was racing to defend himself. “What? No, of course I trust you. I just—I just want to know what the real meaning behind the play was about; that’s all!” And if you can’t tell me, then what else am I supposed to believe? “Yn, come on, honey—please—”
“It’s about you.”
All breath left him. You saw the way one hundred and one emotions flickered through his eyes; all of thoughts racing about at once as he tried to comprehend. “What? I don’t—I don’t understand.”
You balled your hands into fists in front of you as the frustration suddenly bubbled to the surface. “I wrote it about us, Hyunjae,” you told him. “Alex is based on you, Kai is based on me. I’ve been in love with you since junior year of high school, and that is what the true premise of the play is about.” Your hands were shaking now, gesturing between the two of you in stiff, constrained motions like the feeling of your chest’s range of movements at this time.
You watched it dawn on him, watched him swallow—hard. “Yn, I’m sorry—”
“Jaehyun.”
He shut up immediately.
You pressed your fingers to the space between your eyes. For a second, you swore you could feel tears tickle the insides of your eyes, and you blinked them away, inhaling deeply to get your body to calm the fuck down. Why were you crying? There was no reason to be crying right now. “Can you—” you stumbled over your words for once, “—can you give me some space. I can’t… I can’t think.”
He obliged you, backing up a few steps, and you said fuck it. “Hyunjae, I need space. Please.”
You thought you saw hurt flash across his face, but you just wanted to be out of his eyesight. You couldn’t bear to feel those soft, sympathetic eyes on you. You couldn’t bear the weight of his “I’m sorry I don’t feel the same” right now.
“Okay,” he said, though barely audible.
It took a minute, but he left and you were finally able to suck in a large gulp of air. You strode out of the sound box and realized that everyone on stage was either looking your way, or had quickly turned their heads to pretend they hadn’t just seen that silent argument take place through the sound box window.
Your face and neck were on fire, but you swallowed your pride and returned to your rightful place in the middle aisles of the floor seats. You picked up your script from where you’d abandoned it by your bag. “Right,” you said, your voice shaky until you cleared your throat. (Your hands were definitely still a bit wobbly, but that wasn’t your greatest concern right now.) “Where were we? Scene one, right?”
Everyone slowly began making their way back to their original positions, but Younghoon walked up to the bottom stage and lowered his voice to say, “Yn, we can take a break if you need one. Take five, then reconvene.”
He probably knew what just went down in the sound box. Yet, you found yourself shaking your head. “No, it’s fine,” you assured him, un-reassuringly. “I can do this, Hoon.”
He frowned at you then—those damn, soulful eyes—but nodded, respecting your decision. Like everyone else, he returned to the original position his character was in at the top of the scene.
I’m sorry, his voice seemed to echo in your ears. A part of you ached at the thought of that stark hurt on his face, but you were hurting, too. Why would you send him away like that?
You blinked, your head clearing. “Okay, everyone. Let’s see it.”
— ✶
A few hours later, you finally had everyone wrap up for the night.
“Thanks for all your hard work today!” You exclaimed as the actors and techies began swarming the stage to put props away. You climbed up to the stage, too, jumping onto one of the backdrops that Younghoon was wheeling backstage to help him direct it through the heavy folds of the backdrop curtain.
Younghoon shot you a smile from the other side of the prop. “Well, Miss Director, nice work today.”
You returned the expression wholeheartedly. “Thanks, man. The same goes to you; I appreciate all your hard work today. And that idea for the wedding sequence was absolutely brilliant.”
He chuckled at that, and the two of you worked together to slot the prop onto the cart with the rest of the ones that were just like it. A couple of stagehands then moved the assembly line along and rolled the cart down the hall to lock up in one of the dressing rooms. “I like to think I’ve been to enough weddings at this point to know how to spice them up.”
“Ah, that’s right,” you mused along with him as the two of you began walking down the backstage corridor to where you knew his partner was hard at work with that miraculous fountain. “I remember something about yours and YH!Yn’s first proper outing being to your cousin’s wedding?”
Younghoon threw his head back with a hearty chuckle at that. “Your memory serves you correctly then,” he confirmed. “Well, it wasn’t our first proper outing together. Technically, we met at an outing—”
“What do you think they were arguing about? It looked like they broke up or something.”
The line caught you off guard, and your footsteps faltered. Younghoon gave you a confused look, eyebrow arched. Your ears strained to eavesdrop on the conversation happening in one of the open dressing rooms you just passed by.
“No way that they were dating! … okay, I guess that would make sense why she put up with him all the time,” a second voice scoffed. “Maybe she finally got tired of his bullshit and cut him off.”
“That would make sense as to why he got out of the theater so fast. I went to their high school, and even after Hyunjae left, the year above me still talked about him—”
Your hand slammed against the doorframe of the dressing room, effectively making the two stagehands inside jump in surprise. They gaped at you with wide eyes, lips parted in shock as you addressed them with a carefully-made blank expression. “Let’s not go sticking our noses where they aren’t appreciated, yeah? Worry about yourselves, thanks.”
The two bowed their heads, apologies crawling from their mouths, and you turned back into the hallway where Younghoon was waiting for you.
You resumed your walk down the hall, and your friend casted you a side-long glance. “Thanks for standing up for him like you do,” he said to you. “I don’t know what happened today, but…”
“It doesn’t matter what happened today,” you said to Younghoon with a small exhale. You gave him a smile, even though you knew it wasn’t convincing. “I’ll always stand up for him.”
“Even when he doesn’t deserve it?” Younghoon joked with a laugh.
Your smile curled a little wider. “Even when he doesn’t deserve it.” In reality, you knew that he deserved to have someone stand up for him. Whether that be you, or Younghoon, or even Jihoon—you knew that everyone deserved to have someone watch their back when they weren’t around. You might have pushed him away earlier this evening, but that would never stop you from continuing to protect him. It was simple, really; you loved him.
EPISODE NINE: ARE DRAMA MAJORS ALWAYS SO DRAMATIC? WAIT, DON’T ANSWER THAT.
“I don’t understand why we couldn’t have done this in the grocery store like you guys always do,” Hyunjae grumbled as sounds of livelihood raged all around him: pots and pans clanged to the sizzle of food on the stove, the TV played some random American murder mystery show on low volume, and Hyunjae was sandwiched in between two others on his and Younghoon’s apartment couch.
Chanhee, who sat on the other side of Juyeon (who was on one side of Hyunjae), snorted. His nose was in his phone as he scrolled through Instagram, but didn’t look up as he replied, “As if we’d let you into Grocery Aisle Therapy. That’s exclusive admission.”
“That’s true,” Jacob chimed in from Hyunjae’s other side, as the man spooned a generous helping of Frosted Flakes into his mouth, “I tried.”
“And if even Jacob was denied entry,” Sangyeon mused from the kitchen as he turned off the stove and hood range, carrying over a bowl of the fried rice he had made for himself. Haknyeon skipped behind him with his own bowl and his cheeks were already full of the delicious food. Eric and Sunwoo were swift to follow their friend’s lead and raced into the kitchen to get a helping for themselves.
Changmin made a face from where he sat on the floor below Chanhee and Younghoon. “Not for lack of trying. You should’ve seen JC!Yn try to resist his goo-goo eyes. Bleh,” he gagged.
“I admire her tenacity then,” Hyunjae sniffed. “Not everyone can resist Jacob.”
Jacob beamed.
Kevin narrowed his eyes at Changmin. He sat just a few spaces away from the glasses-wearing menace, but carefully cross-legged and cradling a bowl of popcorn in his hands. “You say that when you literally pined after your girlfriend like an angsty teenager for three years.” He feigned a face of contemplation, then added, “Oh wait, you actually are an angsty teen—aye! Dad, Changmin hit me!”
“I am so sick of this family,” Sangyeon mumbled under his breath as he collapsed into the armchair adjacent to the sofa-sectional everyone else flocked upon. “Enough, both of you. Why were we all called here, again?”
Eric slid back into the living room on the polished wood floors in his socks, then perched atop the arm of Sangyeon’s armchair as he feasted upon his bowl of fried rice. He carefully lowered each spoonful of rice into his mouth so he wouldn’t dirty the fluffy cardigan he now wore. "Hyung's in trouble with his lady lover."
“Lady lover?” Sunwoo echoed with his face scrunched up like he just ate something sour. He had taken the spot between Kevin and Changmin to hopefully stop one from kicking the other again (hopefully).
"You're so judgmental."
"And you're—"
Sangyeon massaged the migraine pulsing in his temples away furiously with a clear grimace. "Shush, children. What did you do this time, Hyunjae?"
Hyunjae's jaw dropped, an image akin to one particular Pikachu meme. "Why am I immediately assumed to be the one at fault?"
"You summoned us all here," Haknyeon said with a shrug. "And Younghoon hyung said that it looked like you and Yn-ie suffered a break up in front of the entire main cast of Jasmine."
Hyunjae threw a displeased glance Younghoon's way; the tall man grinned sheepishly as if saying "what was I supposed to do—lie?" Hyunjae stared down at his lap, fidgeting with his fingers and the watch on his wrist. "It wasn't a break up…"
Kevin made a disapproving noise. "Oh, we know."
Hyunjae glared down at the top of Kevin's head. "Rude."
"Okay, so explain what happened," Juyeon prompted.
The man in question sucked in a breath. Where to begin? Someone muted the TV, so Hyunjae and Younghoon's apartment descended into a coat of silence. Everyone waited for Hyunjae's response.
Hyunjae decided that there was only one logical way to start. He began when he first received a text message from the elusive 'Ellie', your supposed best friend before him. He couldn't believe you had a soulmate other than him, but it only mattered that you two had found each other—not that that mattered—
He went through the entire spiel: Ellie had texted him about some project they worked on together in senior year of high school. He hadn't known why she would even care about something dumb they'd done in high school especially when she was a fourth year in college like the rest of you. But she had asked politely and he wasn't one to just dismiss someone when it was a simple, innocent request. However, when he had finished with this little task, he should have stopped there.
Their conversations eventually escalated from innocent "oh, you remember when…" to "if we meet, you have to agree to hear my side of the argument." He remembered her exact words: "You'll be very shocked to hear the truth" regarding your business with the play. He wanted to look out for you like you always did for him (and screw it, he was curious), so he obliged Ellie and met with her.
That had been one of many mistakes he made. The biggest mistake was what went down at the theater a couple of days ago. And now? He had just made you confess to him, he had broken your trust, and he didn't know how he was going to make it up to you.
(He had to admit though, that once he finally got space to think about what you said to him, there was something about the prospect of you being in love with him that gave his heart a lively kick-start—)
Chanhee reached over Juyeon's head and swatted Hyunjae's neck like there was a very large mosquito there. "You dumbass!"
Hyunjae yelped, his hand reaching up to rub the aching place furiously. "Ow!"
"Deserved," Kevin sang as he tossed a handful of popcorn into his mouth. "That was super not cool, man."
"You don't think I know that?" He rolled his eyes.
"Yes," everyone chorused together.
Cue his next set of eye rolls.
"Hyung," said Sunwoo as he shifted so he faced Hyunjae. His eyes squinted up at him, his curly bangs falling into his pupils as they usually did. "How could you not see that she was in love with you? You have to be blinder than a bat."
"You've been hanging out with SW!Yn too much," Changmin teased.
"Hey, don't bring her into this and taint her good name! Even she saw how perfectly enraptured Yn-ie is."
Changmin opened his mouth to make another unnecessary comment, but Sunwoo slapped a palm over his friend's mouth.
"I guess that leaves one question," said Juyeon, finally, after a long stretch of his silence.
"And what's that, Juyeonie?" Sangyeon asked.
Juyeon pursed his lips together in a slight pout. "What else? Are you in love with Yn, too, Hyunjae?"
Oh—
Hyunjae's thoughts careened to a stop when he felt his phone buzz in his pocket. He maneuvered around on the couch cushion to retrieve the device, his heart pounding in anticipation—but that emotion was immediately swapped out with utter disdain.
His friends observed this flip with great interest. "Who—"
An indignant spark lit Hyunjae's dark irises as he furiously typed something to the sender and promptly blocked the number.
Jacob and Juyeon, who were able to peer over at Hyunjae's phone screen, both widened their eyes in scandal. Jacob grinned, lifting his hand to delicately hide his snickers. "Well that answers our question."
Hyunjae sulked, swiping through his contacts, then blocking Ellie's number, too. He should have done that so damn long ago.
"It was some guy asking if he knew if Yn was free in two weeks—"
"And she's not," Hyunjae grunted, shoving his phone back into his pocket, then standing up to go get Sangyeon's fried rice in the kitchen. "These fucking guys, man. Like, what the fuck am I gonna do? Hype you up to her? No way in hell—" He scoffed, slapping a spatula of rice into his bowl with a strength that the bowl, rice, and utensil didn't deserve.
He couldn't believe that one stupid, little thing the two of you had done in freshman year of college had led to this spam of dudes flooding his inbox for you. If he had half a mind, he would declare that you weren't on the market anymore and that you weren't even interested in seeing any… body…
The thought marinated in his head for a moment as he slowly chewed the fried rice. Why did he want you "off the market"? You were his best friend, but you weren't his to covet or shield or speak for. You weren't his.
You weren't… his.
"Oh my god, you can actually see the neurons firing in his brain for once."
Hyunjae plopped himself back into his original place on the couch. "I hate you guys."
"So you've realized that you're in love with her?" Younghoon asked exasperatedly, his hands splayed out on his legs like he was begging to the cosmos.
Hyunjae made a face and pretended that his heart wasn't palpitating and that a drop of sweat wasn't dripping down the back of his neck right now. "What? Of course not," he said through a mouthful of fried rice.
One could hear the collective exhale of disappointment all the way to your townhouse.
— ✶
It was Thursday evening when you found yourself walking out of the performing arts hall after yet another rehearsal, and coming face to face with the person who had become one of your greatest problems over the past month.
Your hand stopped in midair from which you were brushing the hair out of your face when you and a young woman made eye contact. She was seated on one of the benches facing the entryway of the performing arts hall, her attention lifting away from her phone and to you. The sky remained alight and streaked in its dazzling sunset colors, and yet, the sight of her made everything feel grayed.
She smiled at you. "Ah, you're done."
Something crawled beneath the surface of your skin. For a second, you thought it was disgust, but upon further thought, it was really something bittersweet. You swallowed, adjusting your hold on your bag strap. "Can I help you?"
"Do you remember me, Yn?"
"Of course, I do, Ellie." How could I forget you?
Ellie's smile shuddered and you suddenly couldn't read her face. It was strange seeing her four years into the future. You remembered catching glimpses of her in the hallways, her sweet smile and button nose, the freckles sprinkled across her cheekbones like kisses from the sun. "I guess that's one thing out of the way."
Her biting words to Hyunjae appeared in the forefront of your mind. "What you said to Hyunjae—"
"Was true," she cut in. "And based on the fact that he blocked me a few days ago, I'm guessing that something happened between you two." Her lips curled upward, "How does it feel to know he actually doubted you? If I'm being honest, it makes me fucking sing, Yn!" There was a shiver-inducing giddiness to her voice and you wondered if this was all a joke. It would be a cruel joke, but anything would be better than this.
Could she see the horror on your face? "Ellie, we were friends," you managed to say.
She pressed her lips together. "We were friends until you decided that we weren't."
"What are you talking about?" You threw back at her. "We drifted apart—"
"You abandoned me," she quipped. The smile was gone now, her mouth set into a taut line. "You left me to rot."
Your heart dropped into your stomach. About a million things flashed through your mind, but most of all, you came to a very fast epiphany: you'd always thought she was happy. "Ellie," you said, slowly, softly, "I'm sorry that you felt that way. Really, I am so sorry."
"I've made sure you feel that way."
"But you should have left Hyunjae out of this."
Ellie laughed and the sound was harsh. "This isn't about your stupid best friend, or whatever. This is about you and me. I can't believe you thought—how could you prefer him over me? Why did you stop talking to me, Yn?"
You were so confused. All this time, you had thought that yours and Ellie's friendship ended on a mutually neutral ground. You thought that you had just drifted away from one another from the eventuality of time. Was that not how she saw it this entire time?
The end of Ellie's question took on a raspy undertone, the gleam in her eyes less so that of anger, but the melancholy underneath. You wanted to make things right, but you didn't know what that was.
When you had yet to say anything except for letting the breeze waft past your face, she let out a scoff. It was a somewhat embarrassed sound, her eyes skittish. "You know that my parents always compared me to you. Constantly. You remember what you said to me?"
You swallowed. "'They can compare all they want, but you'll always be enough for me.'"
"I didn't want to bother you when we 'drifted apart', as you say," she continued on with a huff. "And then I saw you and Hyunjae, and the way you looked at him—god, I knew right away, Yn. And I was so bitter. Just so, so bitter." She shook her head. "I've been thinking about this for a long time."
Dear god, you hadn't known this whole time. You'd wished you had known. You didn't know what you might have done differently—maybe not have been so blind—but… what if you couldn't have saved that friendship? Was this always meant to happen in the grand scheme of the universe's stage?
You made your way toward her and she simply watched as you stopped a handful of paces away from her. “I didn’t mean to drift away from you or to make you feel like I was replacing you in any way.” For a moment, you were quiet, and you inhaled a deep breath to query, "What made you suddenly want to confront me after so long then?"
She peered up at you, a mixture of sadness and something sharper in the reflection of her irises. "You didn't have to keep getting better and showing off. I just got sick of living in your shadow when you weren't even there."
You bristled at that. “What else could I have done? I’m sorry you felt that way, really, but I had a lot of pressure on my shoulders, too. I wanted them to stop expecting more from me, but each time I did something right, they kept pushing for more. And I—”
“I just wanted my friend back!” She exclaimed.
The words died on your tongue, dissipating in the tense air between you two. The fight left you then, seeing the hard break in her expression, a sliver of the girl you remembered from so long ago. What happened to her? She’d been poisoned by whatever feelings were locked inside her, and you supposed that it was only inevitable that those same feelings would one day be unleashed. You wished she didn’t have to confront you this way. "So you thought lying to Hyunjae would have done the trick?" You finally murmured.
"You didn't figure out who's been messing around with your production all quarter?"
The question caught you off guard, but you were quick to catch on nonetheless. Your breath hitched as you stood there, stunned. "That was you?"
A nod.
"All of it?" Disbelief struck you clean across the face and you felt like you'd just been slapped. A new level of anger boiled in your blood; all of those nights you spent creeped out of your mind, the extra stress from all the superstitious bullshit—
"This is our last act," she said, her tongue darting out for a moment. "I don't want anything else from you after this."
You couldn’t believe she would go through all of this trouble—all for what? All to prove what? It was utterly childish, preposterous, dramatic. “Good,” you asserted, as firmly as you could muster, “I don’t want anything from you either.”
And there was a split-second where you saw a crack in her expression, truly. Before, when you’d seen that bit of melancholy seep through, it must have been purposeful. Perhaps it was to draw some kind of sympathy or guilt from you, but after she admitted to doing all of that crap to you and your peers, you weren’t about to lean into that, old friend be damned. Of course you felt bad that she had felt like that for so long. You pitied her. But it didn’t mean you had to forgive her; not for this.
Maybe this was it though: all she wanted from you was for you to feel as helpless as she had, but you simply couldn’t feel that way. All that you could feel was cold fury.
“Fine,” she cleared her throat, straightening. “I hope you learned your lesson.”
You let out a scoff, the sound making her eyelids shudder. Your teeth grated against each other as you closed yours and her “final act”: “And I hope you’ve learned yours. I hope I never see you again.”
You turned brusquely on your heel to walk away before you did anything rash. But a sudden thought appeared on the tip of your tongue, and you found yourself stopping. When you glanced back at her, she was watching you leave with an emotion you couldn’t quite detect. The two of you had been such good friends, and… you really wished you could understand her position better. “I just don’t understand why you went through all this trouble. If you had just—texted me, called me—” You made a gesture with your hand then let the limb fall limply to your side, “You could’ve just said hi.”
You left her behind after that, purposefully this time. Did people like Ellie deserve their chance at redemption? Maybe when the dust had settled, but for now, you hoped she received her due karma.
EPISODE TEN: GOOGLE, DEFINE DRAMATIC IRONY.
THEY said that a terrible dress rehearsal marked a production for a brilliant opening night. As Michael, the wine salesman dude, forgot his fifth line of the rehearsal; as the tech staff in the box forgot their second lighting cue of the night; and as Hongjoong continued to have to fuss over San’s Uncle™ beard for the third time, you were trying very hard to keep that saying in mind.
Weeks had passed—you didn’t know how many, maybe five, maybe two, maybe an entire year—but that entire time, you didn’t feel Ellie’s presence haunting you anymore, nor had you heard from Hyunjae yet. He was busy with his architectural capstone project, anyway, and you felt that you both needed to take this time to yourselves to focus on more important things. (You thought this as if your friendship with him didn’t mean the absolute fucking world, but you were pretty sure you were seconds away from setting this building on fire so—)
The dreaded Tech Week had descended upon the cast and crew of Jasmine. Not only that, but it was also Finals Week, meaning everyone in this room was just as stressed out as they usually were, except, five times more. It made for a great rehearsal, clearly.
“—remember that as soon as she says ‘fine!’, you have to be out here to pull the rug out from beneath her feet,” you instructed the stagehand, who looked a millisecond away from passing out right there on the stage.
When they nodded their understanding, you turned away with a migraine pounding away at your temples. You just had to get through one more act, and you could call it a night. Opening night was literally in four days, and you were trying not to yearn after your best friend and feel guilty about pushing him away—and then there was the guilt that had slowly bubbled up over the past few weeks from what happened with Ellie. Maybe it had been all your fault—
“Yn, your eye is twitching.”
“Huh?” You perked up from where you were seemingly glaring a hole in the ground of the nosebleeds. Younghoon shot you an amused, yet mildly concerned look from within the winds of the stage. “Oh, sorry. Can we take it from the top of act three, please? One more act, people; let’s hang in there.”
That latter bit was more for you.
By the end of rehearsal, everyone was just as happy as you were to head home. Today was Monday, the beginning of the week, and yet you wished it was Saturday already—graduation. Now that was the light at the end of the tunnel.
Younghoon held the door open for you as the two of you exited out the front doors of the performing arts hall. When you murmured a thank you to him, he fell into step with you easily. The walk to the bus station seemed impossibly long with the ache in your legs.
Younghoon released a low-sounding whistle. “So…”
“Hm?”
“Are you coming to Cobie’s surprise birthday party tomorrow? I know it’s finals week and tech week, but it’d be nice to have that little break beforehand.”
Oh, right. Hyunjae’s friend Jacob was having his birthday party—well, it wasn’t him who was hosting, but his girlfriend. She had organized all of it, and had even had the good will to extend an invitation to you. At the time, you couldn’t find it in you to say no, despite the knowledge of your busy month at the forefront of your mind. But even now, you found it hard to really formulate a concrete response. The uneasiness was creeping up on you again.
“I dunno, Hoon…” you said lowly with a wince. “Maybe I should just catch up on sleep, y’know? And plus, I don’t want my feelings for Hyunjae to ruin the mood or anything. I’m kind of a Debby Downer right now,” you laughed pitifully.
Younghoon’s mouth curved into a frown. “Yn, you’re not a downer. You’re stressed and you have a lot of burden on your shoulders, but… I think something carefree will be good for you, no? Maybe you should at least stop by and say hello to people—take advantage of Hyunjae having to be in charge of providing free booze for everyone.”
You glanced up at him, meeting his kind eyes. “I’ll think about it,” you promised. You were probably too tired to think logically about going anywhere else but your bed at this moment.
Younghoon nodded. “Okay.”
As the two of you carried on down the stairs now, the bus stop in sight, you gathered your wits about you. “How is… how is he, by the way?” You asked.
Younghoon peered at you with something akin to gentleness and sympathy. “He’s… I think he’s okay.” He squinted one eye as he looked up toward the night sky, the thoughts meandering about his head. “You just have to give him some time. You know how stubborn he is,” he joked.
You could only give a shallow nod at that.
Not one to let a friend leave him so upset, he nudged you with the back of his hand. “Hey, don’t worry too much about him, okay? You have a lot on your plate right now, and you deserve to have your head in the game, okay? It’s all gonna be okay.”
“You always have such a way with words,” you laughed lightly as you wiped a tear from your eye—whether it was from emotions or just being plain exhausted, you couldn’t tell.
He smiled again then. “If I wrote down these words, I’d be stealing your job, Miss Director.”
Your laugh was a little brighter at that note. “Okay, Actor Extraordinaire. We’ll see about that.”
The two of you shared a laugh, and when you reached the bus stop, Younghoon waited until the bus came by to pick you up. It wasn’t yet deep night, but he was a gentleman all the same. You climbed up into the bus, scanning your transportation card as you went, then sat by a window to wave to Younghoon.
When the bus pulled away from the curb and away into the night, Younghoon pulled out his phone to the text chain with his partner. He’d come to a decision then, and as hungry as he was, he figured he could channel this annoyance into confronting one certain man by the name of Lee Jaehyun.
younghoon’s phone: love, i think i’m going to be late for dinner
beloved mastermind: i’ll save u a seat &lt;;3
— ✶
The lights beneath the swimming pool glowed an ethereal shade of fluorescent blue. It reminded Younghoon of a mermaid's cove with the way the light waves reflected off the ceilings of the building to create scales on the rafters. The emptiness of the indoor swimming pool was offset by the thrashing of flesh against water as a lone swimmer stole lap after lap across the great blue.
Younghoon lowered himself onto a steel bleacher and watched Hyunjae bolt from one end of the pool to the next, hardly taking the time to breathe air, like he breathed chlorine and water instead. The familiarity of the smell—warm stone, pungent chemicals—sent flashes of Younghoon's own days on the high school swim team to his mind.
At last, Hyunjae took his final lap, his breathing coming out labored as he swept a hand up his face and through his hair. His locks slicked all the way back, and his chest rose and fell harshly as adrenaline pumped through his veins and his lungs fought to consume oxygen without asphyxiating on it.
Hyunjae clambered his elbows onto the deck. "How'd you—know I was here?" He managed to say, nodding his thanks as Younghoon handed him the water bottle at the other end of the bench from him where Hyunjae's duffle bag sat.
Younghoon gave a meager shoulder shrug. "I know you too well not to," he said. The two were both swimmers, and where else would swimmers go to put their head somewhere else and to escape the world?
Hyunjae couldn't argue with that.
The two friends were quiet for a minute as Younghoon let Hyunjae catch his breath. There was something troubling about seeing him so tense, even after pumping out so many laps. The exhaustion didn't seem to outweigh the conflict warring in his mind.
Finally— "Hyunjae-ah, what are you doing?"
Hyunjae blinked up at him, perplexed. "Huh?"
Younghoon leaned his cheek against his palm, elbow resting on top of his knee. He fixed him with a stare. "What are you doing?" He repeated.
This time, the message seemed to have been delivered successfully. Hyunjae licked his lips, his gaze averting away from Younghoon. "Did you come here just to scold me?"
"No, I came here to tell you you're being an angsty teen."
Hyunjae scowled, his lips pressed into a pout. "No, I'm not."
Younghoon rolled his eyes just as his stomach grumbled in protest at him not going straight to meet his partner for dinner. Instead, here he was, trying to talk sense to a wall. "You're so childish sometimes."
He quieted. Hyunjae leaned his head against the meat of his forearm, eyes fluttering closed against the warmth of the heated pool deck. "How is she?"
"She's not good, but she's also not bad," Younghoon replied. He sighed, leaning forward onto his forearms for a more comfortable confrontation position. His lips pulled into a line. "Stressed, of course, but I think that was a given."
Hyunjae rubbed his eyes. "I fucked up, Younghoon."
A solemn nod. "I'm glad you see it now."
"This isn't a joke."
"I'm not saying it's a joke."
Hyunjae squinted at him. "Sometimes I don't believe you."
Younghoon smiled cheekily. "Well, sometimes you have to pick who and what to believe."
That hit a nerve, even if Younghoon didn't mean it to. Hyunjae immediately thought of yours and his last conversation. He couldn't get the image out of his head of the look of betrayal on your face when you asked him if he didn't trust you. He'd been stupid to be so curious, but of course he trusted you. He'd always trusted you. Who else could he trust but the very person who always protected him and was by his side? So why did he have to go and be so stupid?
He backed away from the wall for a minute and simply stood in the middle of the shallow lane as if the water could give him wisdom. "I," he began, then sighed, "I miss her a lot. I've wanted to text her, to call her so many times." He smiled, but it wasn't a happy one. "I think I just don't know what I would say."
"An apology would be a good start," suggested Younghoon.
"Right…" That was obvious, and yet, it was always the most difficult step. Would you let him come back into your life after a reveal like that? Feelings were such fragile, fickle things.
His heart sank at the idea of losing you forever though.
One day, she'll drop you, too, those damned words replayed over and over in his head like a broken record. —When she finds someone better… I don't know why she went to you, though. You are awful. I've heard all the stories.
Once upon a time, Hyunjae hadn't always been "awful" or dogged down by other people's negative testimonials about his attitude. So what if he had been "scorned by love" as you so lovingly put it one time? That experience had been enough for him to shut down all access points, keeping you sheltered in with him. It was hard for him to think of wanting to be with anyone else… but you.
He didn't mean to latch onto you so tight, but perhaps he had grown so dependent on you all this time. You had never given him reason to doubt how much you cared—god, why had he been so stupid?
Younghoon watched Hyunjae's inner conflict through the windows to his soul, glowing with the cerulean blue of the chemically altered pool water. "Hyunjae, do you love her?"
Of course he loved you. That was out of the question. But this was a different type of love that Younghoon was referring to, and it called for something much larger in the grand scheme of things.
That kind of love—what a frightening prospect, he thought. But didn't you make everything so much less frightening?
EPISODE ELEVEN: PLACES, EVERYONE!
"YOU stole my boyfriend, by the way." Hyunjae huffed as he set down the last two grocery bags he had helped bring up to the apartment from Juyeon's car.
JC!Yn barely batted an eyelash at him as she swept past to organize the utensils and cups set out on the breakfast table. “You snooze, you lose, Lee,” she teased with a sing-song tone.
From the front door, Sangyeon bumbled in with a clean, crisp white box, as he whistled a happy tune under his breath. JC!Yn greeted him at the entryway, thanking him profusely for picking up the cake, then taking the box from him so she could transfer it to the fridge for safe keeping.
“Chanhee says that he’s bringing his best friend, so he wants everyone to—I quote—‘not be embarrassing’,” Changmin snorted and giggled loudly from the couch where he relayed the information from his texts with Chanhee.
“That’ll be difficult for you,” CM!Yn quipped back so fast that Hyunjae couldn’t even suppress the high-pitched laugh he let out. Not that he wanted to suppress it; he had to admit that Changmin’s girlfriend was just as much a menace as her boyfriend was.
As Changmin’s jaw dropped and he pounced on top of her to tickle her into submission, Hyunjae averted his gaze elsewhere. He pulled his phone out, leaning against the granite kitchen countertop while he read Younghoon’s latest text notifications.
bread face: we’ll be there soon
bread face: i think i saw kevin and jacob a few cars behind us at the intersection, so i’m making haknyeon step on it
hyunjae’s phone: lol i was gonna chastise u about texting and driving hoon
bread face: tch pls, i’m better than that 🙄
bread face: i would at least make yh!yn do my texts for me 🤪
Hyunjae glanced up just in time to see JC!Yn’s front door open to reveal Chanhee and Eric, along with their plus ones. He tongued the inside of his cheek, thinking offhandedly at the fact that so many of his friends had found people to be with. It felt like they were all growing up far too fast; even as a fourth-year in university, it was unimaginable. Where would they all be in ten years? Where would he be?
He hoped, at the very least, that he might see you in his future—one way or another. As long as he could pull his shit together and finally talk to you.
hyunjae’s phone: almost everyone’s here btw r u guys close??
bread face: yeah, pulling up one block over so they don’t see hak’s car
bread face: hey, do yk if yn’s coming today?
Hyunjae’s thumbs hovered over the keyboard, then he typed in the clear answer: no, not a clue. I have a feeling she won’t be here though.
He tucked his phone away, looking over to see that JC!Yn’s roommate, Kei, had just stepped out of her room with a finished “Happy Birthday, Jacob” banner. “Hey, you need help with that?”
— ✶
The party was well under way, and suffice to say, the surprise party had been an entire success. Because Jacob was definitely not a fan of being jumpscared, it was good foresight that everyone was just in sight when he and Kevin opened the door. He had no clue that his partner had organized this for everyone and that everyone else was in on it. (Even Eric was able to keep the secret in the wraps, no doubt with the help of his significant other.) Almost all of his friends had brought along a plus-one, minus the singletons (himself, Juyeon, Kevin, and Sangyeon—though, that was still debatable) and Haknyeon and Sunwoo who’s significant others weren’t too close with the group just yet. It was a marvel that Younghoon’s girlfriend decided to come, too, but she said she would probably leave early anyway.
“You’re so sad-looking,” said Juyeon as he hopped onto the island counter next to Hyunjae. The two of them could scope out the whole apartment from this vantage point; the mood seemed to be at an all-time high, despite it being an incredibly stressful week for everyone.
Hyunjae made an indignant noise and he lifted his plastic cup of soda to his lips. “Pfft. I’m not sad-looking.”
Juyeon gave a meager shrug. “Every time you see someone and their partner, you look like your puppy just got taken.”
“That’s—” he stammered in protest, “—that’s not true. I—I just keep thinking about my arch capstone, that’s all! School is ruining my life.” The lie was so stark that even Hyunje winced to himself.
“Ah, well, I can relate to that,” his friend sighed. The two gazed out at the party, their ears perking up when they heard Sangyeon say something about him and Jacob needing to step outside for Jacob’s birthday gift—whatever that meant. Hyunjae and Juyeon exchanged strange looks with one another, before bursting into laughter.
Not even a few minutes had passed before Jacob and Sangyeon walked back into the apartment with everyone’s curiosity piqued. Jacob had on the best poker face that he could muster, his lips pressed together but a muscle in the corner of his mouth twitching upward like he was either trying not to laugh or smile.
“Well?” Kevin was the first to voice. He, along with everyone else over at the couch, leaned over the back of the furniture, their eyes wide like dogs waiting for a treat. Hyunjae and Juyeon probably looked similar from their perches.
“He asked for proof of my girlfriend,” Sangyeon said as he closed the front door behind him.
Hyunjae snorted, catching a slight glare from the eldest in the room. For however long, their friend group had an ongoing inside joke that Sangyeon pretended to have a “secret girlfriend.” It was only because Sangyeon had never once provided concrete proof, and maybe it was because he purposefully withheld it, but Hyunjae simply couldn’t understand why. Thus, the hilarious teasing of their eldest friend. Nonetheless, Hyunjae and everyone else remained curious as to the truth.
“Well then?” Juyeon pressed, “What’s the verdict, Cobie?”
The smile on his face really couldn’t be suppressed anymore, and it looked so close to a smirk. Jacob grinned, strolling over to the couch to resume his place between his best friend and girlfriend. “No comment.”
The room erupted into a loud groan from seemingly everyone. “What kind of answer—”
Even Sangyeon looked frustrated and his eyebrows furrowed together, paired with a slight parting of his lips. “Birthday Boy has so much audacity today. Dude, I literally showed you—”
At the sound of the doorbell tone, everyone paused. Hyunjae hopped off the counter, chirping, “I’ll get it!”
No one was opposed to Hyunjae opening the door as everyone else engaged in a battle of wits commenting on Jacob's refusal to confirm nor deny the existence of a future Mrs. Lee Sangyeon. Hyunjae reached the front door and peered through the peephole curiously—then stiffened.
You stood on the other side, your hands fidgety as you played around with the little gift bag in your hands, no doubt for Jacob.
He could hardly believe his eyes—you actually came.
He opened the door without much else left to do. Your gazes clashed in the front threshold of JC!Yn's apartment, your breaths leaving your lungs at the sight of the other. Hyunjae swallowed; he hated this tension, hated the way he couldn't just wind his arms around you as easily as he had done before. The palpitations of his heart were teetering on dangerous territory, and he chalked it up to the fact that he was nervous he might be making you uncomfortable.
"Hey, come in," he murmured low but soft, stepping aside to give you space. He barely registered the background noise at this point.
"Thanks," you said back, your voice barely audible. You stepped out of your shoes and nudged them toward the massive pile by the shoe rack, like an ocean of footwear wherein one must play a matching game in order to leave. You coughed, "Uhm, is there a place where I can put this?" You lifted your gift bag half-heartedly.
"Oh, I can put it—" he automatically reached out for it, and when his fingers grazed against yours, the two of you jolted, "—away," he stammered. You let go of it so he could quickly grab hold and make his very awkward escape.
He dipped into JC!Yn's room where all the presents were being stashed, allowing himself to soak in a bit of quiet, even if he could still hear the muffled party just outside the room. That had to be the worst thing ever. Why was he so jumpy around you? It couldn't be that you professed your being in love with him, right? He wished it wasn't like this.
He needed to talk to you, damn it, he needed to fix this—
But when he emerged from the room and into the main living space, he saw you chatting with YH!Yn and Kevin and Changmin. He watched you smile at them and laugh and look way less awkward than you'd been with him just a minute ago. He remembered what this week was, what Friday was.
Opening night: the culmination of months' worth of blood, sweat, and tears.
He'd been there for you since the beginning of it. He couldn't see you fail, and this was the first time he'd seen you not stressed. He didn't have the heart to ruin that for you right now.
So instead of marching up to you and requesting an audience, he made his way over to a few of his other friends to join whatever conversation they were having. He would fix things when you didn't have five thousand other things to worry about. Today wasn't about him, after all.
EPISODE TWELVE: CALL TIME, BABY!
TONIGHT was the night. You thought you were going to throw up, to be honest, and you gently sipped on an iced caramel macchiato to keep your energy up. Perhaps the caffeine was making you just a little jittery, but it was probably the nerves—
"Yn!"
"Yeah, what's up?" You exclaimed, stopping in your tracks and just barely dodging the pair of stagehands hustling a backdrop past you.
Jihoon gestured wide with his arms. "Where are you going? Preshow's in seven minutes."
Oh, right. Your eyes widened in incredulity at your absentmindedness and practically jogged over to Jihoon and the other end of the corridor that led back toward backstage, instead of wherever the fuck you were off to… "Sorry," you muttered, waving vaguely to your head, "dunno what's up with me right now. Is everyone ready? Everything in place?"
He nodded, his eyes leaving you for a second while someone said something to him in his headset. "Ugh, shit. We can't find SW!Yn—ever since she got that boyfriend of hers—"
Your hands flapped between the two of you as you nodded your head vigorously—yeah, it was definitely the caffeine. "She's probably in the sound booth with Chan and the others. She's not that boy crazy."
Jihoon made an unconvinced expression, but bid you farewell nonetheless. He probably knew more than you did, but that was expected since you weren't exactly a long-term staff member working backstage. Jihoon ran a tight ship; there was no way anyone would risk a Jihoon stare by saying hi to their significant other.
You held your head in your hand and set your drink down on one of the stools by the edge of the room so it wouldn't get knocked over. Tonight was Opening Night—the night. Tonight, there was a full house, including your friends and family, everyone at school, and about a dozen or so industry experts. The latter weren't just here for you, but for your acting peers, as well. This was a critical night for everyone. It absolutely had to go right.
You shifted the headset on top of your head and made your way back down the corridor. You were far too antsy to just stay in one spot.
"—can one of you go check Jess's hair and makeup—no, don't just rip it, hon, that's not how it works!" You recognized that anguished cry anywhere, and you peered into the dressing room Hongjoong and a swarm of other busy people were.
"What's going on?" You asked.
Hongjoong's head whipped around so fast you were surprised he didn't get whiplash. "Yn, thank God! You know how to braid?"
"Jess still needs hair and makeup?"
"Yes, one of my people had to call out sick—thanks Yn-ie!" You were already on your way to find where Jess was before he had finished his sentence. You'd hardly even processed the fact that one of the costume staff had to call out sick—that wasn't your main concern right now—you literally had less than five minutes to locate Jess and yeet yourself backstage.
The sound in your headset sparked to life. "Sound to Yn, Yn to sound. Can you hear me?" Bang Chan's voice echoed into your ears.
You narrowly got beheaded by a portion of the wedding arch coming down the hallway. "Loud and clear; fuck, it's a mess back here, Chan." God, your head hurt and the play hadn't even begun yet.
"Hey, man. Take a little breath, okay? Yeah, there you go."
You sucked in a very large breath of air. The adrenaline was pumping through your veins and your hands suddenly felt very cold. "Hyunjae usually helped me through opening nights," you exhaled, your head swerving left and right as you checked each room for Jess's presence. "Where is she?"
"I know, Yn," he said gently. "You can do this though. I know you can. You've been waiting for this for four years—hell, even longer than that."
Your head bobbed up and down as if he could see you—oh shit, was that her you just saw?
"He's probably sitting in one of those velvet seats, absolutely pumped for you."
"Even though I completely fucked up our friendship?" You choked out, flagging Jess down. The poor girl looked frantic as she was trying to finish her stage makeup while also braiding her hair. There was no way she could do both, but you admired the attempt. You began to help her out with her hair as she used her phone as a mirror.
"I don't know what happened, Yn, but he loves you too much to not be here tonight."
It was suddenly very difficult to swallow.
"Preshow in two. Are you ready for this, Director Ln?"
You finished the braid, snapping the elastic with a crisp thwip. Tapping Jess to let her know she was good to go, you made an immediate reverse maneuver to backstage. You took a deep breath in once more—held it—
Get your head in the game. Chan was right—you'd been waiting for this for far too long, worked far too hard. You needed to put faith in your abilities and your peers. "Let's do this."
When you returned to the main backstage portion, you found techies ready to go, as well as your main cast. You caught Younghoon's eyes, silently asking for him to round up Eunwoo while you got Sana and Miyeon. Quickly, the five of you met in the middle.
"Everyone feeling okay?" You asked them, making eye contact with each and every one of them.
There was a buzz about the air, both nervous and excited. You could feel it in the way your hands shook, but you reminded yourself this was what you lived for. Someone, probably Chan, gave you the one minute warning.
"We're gonna do great out there," Younghoon affirmed.
"And when in doubt," Miyeon chimed in, "just improvise."
A small chuckle rang out, and you could hear the countdown in your ear. You had to go out on stage and greet everyone.
"Okay, I got my cue," you said to them. "Break a leg, everyone. Chins up, alright?"
"You too, Yn," Younghoon said to you with a pointed look.
A smile graced your face then, and something settled within your chest—finally—something like a calm. "I will."
— ✶
The only reason why Hyunjae knew how expensive flowers were was because he was well-versed in the nature of presenting you with them after each production you'd completed, whether that be through theater or film. It was all standard practice, and he couldn't believe Sunwoo had the audacity to argue with him and his girlfriend about when to send flowers backstage.
Flowers were to be withheld from reaching the actor, staff, or director until the end of the performance. It was just one of those other superstitious things.
So here he was, sitting shoulder to shoulder between Juyeon and a stranger, with a lap full of vibrant blooms in what he thought were the best seats in the house: the lower balcony seats. They were probably his favorite place to get a proper view of the stage while also not being as high as the top balcony and seeing the top of actors' heads. Maybe it was the child in him that liked anything concerning the balcony.
The play had been going strong for the entire run time. You had come out on stage at the very beginning to welcome everyone and thank them for coming tonight. All the relevant information about the play could be found in the playbills that were handed out at the door, and he had instinctively flipped through each page until he could confirm your name and Younghoon's were there. That had definitely brought a smile to his face.
But even now, as the play was coming to an end and the main characters ended up happy together, Hyunjae still couldn't get the smile off his face.
At curtain call, all the actors lined up on stage to take their bows. When you came out to gesture to your acting peers and take your own bow, everyone in Hyunjae's row, especially himself, stood to give you the standing ovation you deserved. Hyunjae's eyes watered as he whooped and cheered and whistled as loud as he could since the flowers made it difficult to clap.
As he and everyone else sat back into their seats, he had to sneak a hand up to delicately wipe his right eye.
"That's my best friend," he said to no one in particular, his laugh watery but proud.
The woman next to him heard him, though. "She's incredible."
Hyunjae smiled at her, then turned his head toward the stage again where you were corralling the main cast in a massive hug onstage. "I know; she's amazing." I love her.
— ✶
The entire performing arts hall was in a state of utter pandemonium. Both the auditorium and the backstage areas were swarmed with people trying to get out of the building, trying to find their friends, and a butt load of other things. You and all the cast members began helping backstage crew take everything down and lock them up; after all, they would need to be preserved for the next two performances of the show that would carry on through the first couple of weeks of summer. Opening Night was only the "presentation" of your thesis.
Tomorrow was Commencement Day—there were a great handful of you graduating literally tomorrow, including yourself, and so you'd all resolved to go home and save the celebration for another night.
As you wandered through the corridors and dressing rooms, you were sure to congratulate everyone for their hard work tonight. Your cheeks ached from smiling, pride singing through your blood, as well as the lingering adrenaline. But you couldn't deny that you were relieved that the night had gone, and gone well.
Friends and family members of the cast and crew began trickling into the backstage area, so the space to roam lessened considerably.
Unbeknownst to you, Hyunjae had rushed back here faster than his friends could stop him, antsy to finally congratulate you and let you know how proud he was and how great the play was. He craned his head over the sea of people, half his bouquet no doubt squished, but he was still determined.
There—he spotted the blazer you wore on stage—but you were all the way at the end of the corridor. There was no easy way through the people, and who knew if you would leave before he could get to you.
"Yn!" He hollered over all the noise.
Like clockwork, your head whipped around from the stagehand you were speaking animatedly with in search of who had called your name. You locked gazes with him, and there was a softening in your features.
(In a crowded room, all I'd see is y—)
His heart leapt and his legs jump-started into high gear, murmuring out sorries as he maneuvered his way toward you. There were tears pricking at his vision; he never cried for anything or anyone, but you'd been the only one to draw such emotion from him. You were the only one who deserved that emotion.
"Jae, you're here," you breathed out, but then somebody tapped your shoulder and nodded in the direction from which you came.
He saw the concern on your face, the sense of responsibility, and yet the reluctance, as well. "Call me when you're done," he said. He mustered a smile, pushing the flowers into your dumbfounded hands. "Promise to call me."
You managed to nod. "Yeah," you swallowed, "thanks for coming tonight."
"I wouldn't miss it for the world."
EPISODE THIRTEEN: ALL THE WORLD'S OUR STAGE
A couple of hours later, you'd managed to express your gratitude to nearly everyone and their mother for their work and help, as well as convince Jihyo to answer any calls that came in regarding the play tonight. It was a big ask and you had been reluctant to ask that of her, but you also knew you needed to talk to Hyunjae.
You made your way out the back door of the performing arts hall and into the warm, early Summer night. There weren’t too many people still around since the only handful of people left in the performing arts center were all older staff members and faculty. You spotted Hyunjae leaning against the wall by the staircase, his gaze lifting from his phone when he sensed you coming toward him. A small smile curled onto his lips, and you realized how much you missed the sight of it.
“Hey, sorry you had to wait for a while,” you said as you approached.
He tucked his hands into his pockets. “No, don’t worry about it. The play was—it was incredible, Yn. I’m really proud of you.”
Those words struck you even harder than you imagined him saying he loved you back would have. It meant a lot coming from other people, but it meant the most coming from him. “Thanks,” you rasped, the emotion shining through your voice, and you had to consciously reign yourself in. “I’m really sorry for what happened. I shouldn’t have pushed you away like that, and I know that my confession was kind of unexpected.”
“You shouldn’t have to apologize for that, Yn,” he said gently, his teeth biting down on his lower lip slightly. “I’m the sorry one. I mean, it was so stupid that I even entertained the idea of Ellie being remotely correct. It was a breach of trust and I crossed a boundary that I shouldn’t have. For that, I’m so sorry.”
You motioned to the path leading down the stairs and toward a path even you knew not where it would lead the two of you tonight. Hyunjae heard your silent suggestion, and the two of you began descending the stairs together, side by side. “Maybe I thought I wasn’t ready at that moment,” you confessed, “but maybe it was what needed to be said, you know?”
When you glanced over at him, you found that he was already looking back at you, clinging onto every word that came out of your mouth.
Your heart rate was still rocketing into the atmosphere right now, but you knew that it wasn’t from the play. “I think that I needed to say that—no matter if I was ‘ready’ or not. I don’t think I would have ever been ready, but…” Your foot hit the bottom step of the stairs, and you turned on the ball of your feet to face him, guiding the two of you down the path and away from your normal direction toward the bus station. “Before you say anything, just hear me out, okay?”
Hyunjae gave a nod, and your heart stuttered in your chest as you forged onward. “You don’t have to affirm my feelings if you don’t feel the same way,” you said, returning to your normal position at his side, “I think that was why I’ve been so afraid of telling you all this time—that you wouldn’t feel the same. That, and the fact that I was scared that telling you would absolutely wreck our friendship like it did these past few weeks.”
From beside you, Hyunjae managed to keep quiet, but his voice was also jammed inside his throat. It was filled up with all the things he’d wanted to say to you first, all the things that he wanted to say in response to what you were telling him now.
“Ellie confronted me the week after our fallout.” Hyunjae stiffened—had she done anything to you? “She told me that she was the one behind all the ‘pranks’ or whatever throughout the play rehearsals.”
“Yn, those weren’t pranks,” Hyunjae couldn’t help but cut in, “it was plain sabotage.”
Sabotage. You’d come to fear labeling her actions with that word, simply because you didn’t want to believe that that was her true intention. You struggled to swallow, stopping in the middle of the walkway. The two of you faced each other then, his eyebrows pressed together in shock and anger and every emotion in between. “She told me she did it to get back at me.”
“For what?”
“I abandoned her,” you told him. That emotion on his face shuddered like ripples in a pool of water. “It’s neither of your faults either, but I guess what I thought was drifting away from her and becoming closer to you, she saw in a more malicious light. And she said that she’d been sick of living in my shadow despite not even being in my life, and I’ve just been thinking about that for a while.” You said you’d be there for her, that she’d always be enough for you… how ironic that you’d been the one to drift away.
Hyunjae peered at you, a mess of things going through his head. You couldn’t imagine what he was thinking about right now, but you knew he was never the best at expressing his emotions and vulnerabilities.
It was okay, though. He didn’t have to say anything. “In that moment, I cut off all ties with her,” you clarified, “when she told me it was all her doing. Now, I just feel a little sad; I wished she would’ve just said hi to me.”
Hyunjae wet his lips, grasping your shoulders to get your attention. “You know you didn’t deserve any of that, right? All that shit she gave you? I mean, she pretty much terrorized you, Yn, and I’m so sorry you had to go through that.”
You wondered—no, you knew—he was probably beating himself up inside for the argument the two of you had, too. The combined force of all of those tough conversations, as well as the pressure from the play… “I’m okay, Jae,” you reassured him. This time, you even believed what you said. “I’m shaken, no doubt, but it’s something that will pass with time.”
In this lighting, he was beautiful, ethereal. The amber streetlight casted a heavenly glow upon him, and made his eyes glimmer like the moon off a still body of water. You’d written something like that description somewhere in the original script, and you realized just how intimately you’d projected your reality into the lines of that production. Perhaps one day, you’d have the strength to point them all out to him.
A thought suddenly occurred to you in the silence, and your eyes widened to the size of saucers. “Oh my god.”
“What? What’s wrong—”
“I never got to see your finalized capstone project!” You gasped, your hands flying to your mouth in scandal. “Shit, the showcase for it was yesterday, wasn’t it? Oh shit, I’m awful—” For as supportive as Hyunjae had been with your final project, you had neglected to even think about his thesis these last weeks. Guilt coursed through your body in waves and you wanted to screech—
“Hey, honey,” he chuckled good-naturedly, “it’s okay. You were busy; don’t sweat it.” He bit his lip again, but it did nothing to suppress the shit-eating grin on his face. “Wanna go see it now? I’m sure they haven’t cleaned everything up yet.”
Your heart skipped for a new reason now. “You’re gonna break into the architecture building?” You laughed.
“It’s not breaking and entering if you have access,” he said in a “duh” tone, waving around his student ID.
As the two of you made a swift reverse back up the stairs from which you’d come from, you gaped at his ID card in disbelief. “I can’t believe they gave you clearance.”
He wrinkled his nose at you. “Why wouldn’t they grant their top student clearance on his last week?” He sniffed jokingly.
The pairing of dialogue and execution made a giggle sputter out of you, the sound making Hyunjae’s chest feel warm and fuzzy. He hated the tension that had wrapped itself around the bones of his ribcage, but those vines were slowly loosening and blooming into something familiar, and yet new.
The trek to the architecture building was well-worn by both you and him. You hadn’t been by the architecture building in awhile because of your busy schedule, but you used to always pop by to either walk him to lecture or to come visit him while he was working. The building was built in a Greco-Roman style with columns and arches, and beautifully carved marble murals and statues around the perimeter of the roof. You knew that the building style in particular was never Hyunjae’s taste, but you remembered when the two of you had toured the school in your senior year of high school, he had been awestruck nonetheless.
Just as he had said it would, his ID card slid against the panel outside the front doors to the architecture building and came up green.
The two of you, feeling just like you were kids again, giggled as you crept into the darkness of the foyer. Hyunjae grabbed your hand without thinking and dragged you down the right hallway toward one of the larger conference-style classrooms on the ground floor. He didn’t bother turning on any lights in case security came by and saw, but there was a conveniently-placed streetlight right outside the window anyway.
“There’s my masterpiece,” he said quietly, a sort of jitteriness coming through his voice.
You let go of his hand so you could inspect the model he constructed. The feature piece seemed to be the massive clear dome on the top, as well as the smaller, surrounding establishments. “It’s amazing, Jae. This is so cool.”
He almost looked shy as he leaned against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest and watched you. “Ah, thanks. It’s, uh, a proposed model for a new performing arts department.”
Your head turned to him then. “No way.”
“Yes way,” he smiled. “I don’t know if it’ll get taken up by the board or not, but I gave them my whole spiel yesterday.”
“You’re gonna give me the spiel, too, right?”
Hyunjae made a face, feigning reluctance, but you were already dragging one of the chairs over so you could sit for his little presentation. “I mean, I guess I remember enough to do it again.” He took up his rightful place right next to his model, in front you, and cleared his throat to give you his speech.
The speech went wonderfully; you cheered as quietly loud as you possibly could. Your face was split by a bright smile that you were sure was enough to power the lights in this building if you really wanted to. If the board didn’t take up Hyunjae’s proposed new model after that, then you were about to send a strongly worded letter to the dean.
Hyunjae took on a boyish sort of smile after the moment had come and gone. “Hey, you wanna see something cool?”
“Cooler than this?”
“Pfft,” he dismissed nonchalantly, “you flatter me. But yeah, actually. Come on—it’s on the second floor.”
You quickly shoved your chair back into place and followed Hyunjae as he practically ran out of the room and up the stairs to the second floor. He had far too much energy for it being around ten o’clock at night, but when you saw the absolute glow on his face when he took you from project to project, gushing and nerding out about all the clever designs, you didn’t have the energy to even question his energy. There was something utterly contagious about hearing him talk about his major with such passion; you were so glad he had found a home in this field.
When the two of you finally let yourselves out of the architecture building, it was probably around an hour later. Your body ached with exhaustion, but your brain was abuzz with activity. You had missed this, missed him so much. For the first time in a very long time, you had never felt this carefree before.
“Can you believe we’re actually graduating tomorrow?” You asked him as the two of you walked toward the direction of the street your town house was on.
Hyunjae snorted. “No, not at all,” he said with a shake of his head. “Well, I’m actually so glad that I’m finally getting out of here, but it’s kind of scary, too.”
You gave a nod, then tilted your head back to breathe in the comfortable, night air. There were stars up in the sky tonight. “Yeah, I get that. Like, where will we all be, y’know?”
“Right.”
“But I think that the unknown in general will always be scary,” you added. “In the end, we’ll always know that everything will turn out okay.”
“And if it’s not okay, then it isn’t the end yet,” Hyunjae replied with a pointed look.
“Exactly.” You had a few options lined up for you after graduation, but you’d told yourself beforehand that you would deal with all of that after commencement day. After months and years of working nonstop, you deserved a little rest before fully stepping into the adult world. Wow, what a scary thought, indeed. "I'm proud of you, Hyunjae."
He had to stop himself from breaking down right there. "I'm proud of you, too, Yn."
The walk home was quiet, but it was as if a layer of film had been laid over just you and Hyunjae. The white noise of the night became somewhat calming for you, and you felt yourself sinking into a state of serenity. You had confessed your love for him already—he finally knew how you felt—but funny enough, that was freeing.
That had been your biggest secret, and finally being able to lift that burden from your chest was… it was good. Everything was good now.
Hyunjae softly said, "I know that you probably have so much to do after graduation tomorrow, but we've always wanted to go on a road trip cross-country."
When you looked up over at him, he could read the excitement glittering in your irises. "You're right! Man, that conversation was so long ago. I mean… I won't be so busy after graduation, not immediately. I want time to enjoy freedom with you," you laughed, lightly punching his shoulder.
He chuckled, your words soaking into his skin like sunlight on the first warm day after a harsh winter season. "I think it'd be nice, just the two of us." He couldn't wait.
There was an earnestness in the way you looked at him then. His thoughts had been all over the place before, but now, they were beginning to clear. "I think that'd be nice, too."
Your townhouse was now in sight, and a distinct feeling of anxiety rose in his throat. It was bitter-tasting, the way he dreaded leaving you for the night even if he would most definitely see you again tomorrow. He didn't know why inviting himself in like he usually did was so difficult now, but suddenly, you were both standing in the middle of the entryway and you were getting your keys from your bag.
It was late; he shouldn't keep you up. You'd had a long day.
"—you tomorrow then. Thanks for tonight, Jae."
He wrapped his arms around you just as you hugged him, his face pressed against the crown of your head and yours pressed into his shoulder. He didn't want to let go, but it was late—
"Good night," he said, nearly inaudibly.
"'Night," you said, going into the house and closing the door.
Maybe it was the physical, literal visual of you closing the door on him, but the epiphany hit him like a bus.
EPISODE FOURTEEN: AAAND THAT'S A WRAP!
YOU were about five steps from dropping to the floor and sleeping for about five years. Of course, you could not do that because you literally had to wake up to graduate tomorrow, but right this moment, you were so excited to just face plant into your pillow.
Tap!
The first time, you hadn't even heard the tiny noise as you shuffled into your attic bedroom and set your bag on the floor at the foot of your bed.
TAP!
Actually, you hadn't even heard it the second time—
BONK!
"What the…" Your head whirled around toward the window. You could have sworn you heard something hit the window pane. Cautiously, you walked up to the glass and peered out into the darkened street. It was a little difficult to see given the contrast between the light of your bedroom, the dark of night, and the fogging acrylic pane—
You nearly screeched as a small pebbled hit the window, right where your face would have been. What the fuck—?
Immediately, the hairs on the back of your neck stood up. Could this have been Ellie trying to spook you again? No way, right? Plus, wasn't Hyunjae just walking by?...
Oh, wait.
With a huff of indignation, you wrestled with the latch on the window pane just as another tiny rock came flying at the glass. "Hold your horses," you muttered, finally managing to haul the dusty window up. You only ever really opened this window during the warmer months, and so you hadn't used it since probably late fall quarter.
You stuck your head out the window, and surprise surprise, Hyunjae was tossing another piece of ammo up and down in his palm, down at street level. "What is wrong with you?" You stage whispered.
His mouth curved into a frown, head tilting, eyebrows furrowing. "What?"
"What," you repeated firmer this time, "is wrong with you?"
"I needed to get your attention," he shrugged.
"You couldn't just text?"
"Isn't this what Romeo did?"
Clearly, someone hadn't been paying attention when you were studying for your classes on Shakespeare in both high school and second year of college. "No," you quipped, "and Romeo was stupid."
Hyunjae sighed, reaching up to cup the back of his neck, dropping the pebble in his hand to the ground. "Okay, so maybe I'm not some Romeo—" You weren't quite sure where he was going with this.
He started walking around, pacing the sidewalk in front of your townhouse since he couldn't stand directly below the window (your roommate would kill him if he killed her azaleas). For a moment, you were ready to go down there yourself and shake the words from him, but it seemed he was able to snap himself into focus.
"I just… it's taken me a long time—god, it always takes me a long time to come up with the words for this type of stuff," he stumbled over his words, and you felt yourself grow increasingly tender. He was never good at wearing his heart on his sleeve. "And my friends have been saying it this whole time—hell, I've probably been aware of it unconsciously this whole time, too! But you know how I am. I'm too damn stubborn to cave, even to myself."
You let him continue on without breaking his monologue. Though you couldn't be too sure what this was, your heart still galloped in hope.
"Yn, I'm—" he said, head tilting back to meet your eyes so you could see those beautiful irises of his, "—I'm in love with you, too."
This was really happening, huh? Your fingers curled around the window sill and you opened your mouth in an effort to say something, but then you closed it. The words and the thoughts were there, but it was so foggy in your mind that you couldn't even string the words together yourself either.
You watched the hope, the light, gradually fade from his expression, even if he wasn't actively trying to show it. "Please tell me to go home if you're not gonna say anything," he said to you next. "I know you're tired, but god, I just stood here and realized I wouldn't be able to sleep if I didn't tell you. I know it's selfish, but…" He lifted his hands in sort of a helpless gesture, his hands then falling limp at his sides.
Finally, you found your voice. You cleared your throat, then asked quietly, albeit a tad nervously, "This—this isn't just because you feel bad about what I said about not reciprocating, right? I mean, higher levels of excitement and arousal can be misattributed to feelings sometimes—"
Hyunjae shook his head. "Dear god, no. I've just been… I've just been really stupid, so, uhm, maybe I am like Romeo?"
You fought the smile on your face, but it seemed you lost the battle. "Silly goose," you teased, laughing as you shook your head. "You ain't no Romeo, Lee Jaehyun, but I've never wanted anyone but you anyway."
He broke into a laugh at that, the sound echoing in the streets, and it sounded like, if one could bottle up pure delight and release it to the world. "You're so much better at this than me."
"Clearly."
"Well," he bit his lip, his smile impish, "can I kiss you to make up for it?"
Oh, there went your heart—there it went, carrying you down the stairs and out the door—you would have leapt out the window if you were physically able (you weren't). Your heart carried you all the way outside again until you arrived in your best friend's arms, his face, his smile illuminated in the soft glow of the streetlight.
And he held you so tight, you couldn't tell if that beating at your chest was his heart or yours. The two of you wasted no time in pressing your mouths to the other, tasting the other's smile in one more way than you'd ever done before.
It felt, at that moment, that this might have marked act three of one part of your life—but act one of the next was just beginning.
Perhaps it was true then: when it counted, you always went back to your first love.
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a/n: heyy thank you for reading thru!! i hope u enjoyed and if u did, pls do consider commenting, reblogging, or sending an ask :] we do love a bit of humility in the end ayo :3 the original plan is to go for sunwoo's next o7
permanent taglist: @tayunji @im-a-big-mess @honeyhuii @crazywittysassy @seomisaho @stopeatread @enhacolor @rnjfy @jaehunnyy @kpopjackie @spiderrenjunfics @soobin-chois @stayarmytinyzenmoa-l @mingiholic @ethereal-engene @ja4hyvn @vatterie @yogurteume @justalildumpling @hyunjaespresent-deobi @hongyangi @pxppxrminty @nerdypastacalzonespy @zhaixiaowen @wtfhyuck @jcmdoll @kflixnet
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haoboutyou · 3 months
Text
masterlist
track with me!
works | recommended | navigation
── ⋆⋅♡⋅⋆ ──
f: fluff | a: angst
seventeen
choi seungcheol
haircut (f)
picture perfect (f)
my little graduand (f)
secret superpower (f)
wen junhui
till death do us part (a)
jeon wonwoo
mornings with you (f)
lee jihoon
when jihoon is in love (f)
congratulations! (a)
kim mingyu
for your convenience (f)
xu minghao
11:55pm (f)
taking it slow (a, f)
stray kids
bang chan
fight for you (f)
lee minho
pretty kitty (f)
changbin
all of the stars (f)
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pepperonidk · 7 days
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All I Could Do || l.jh
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Summary: falling in love is easy. falling out of love is not. a lot can change in five years. (based pretty heavily on the musical The Last 5 Years... i recommend listening to the soundtrack for maximum angst) Pairing: Lee Jihoon x fem!Reader Genre: angst... mostly (specific warnings and content warnings in each chapter)
A/N: my last series was based on books, this one is based on the musical The Last 5 Years, my favorite musical. Jihoon is honestly a really shitty guy in this i'm so sorry
start: 04.28.24
masterlist || the playlist || ao3
join the taglist here!
table of contents under the cut!
i. ride the sun away ii. someone like you iii. i can do better than that iv. schmuel of klimovich v. the next ten minutes vi. in a perfect world vii. where else can i go? viii. everyone bleeds ix. the next five years
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hellohannie · 9 months
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Enchantress of the Forest (m) | ljh
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“𝙅𝙞𝙝𝙤𝙤𝙣, 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙗𝙚𝙚𝙣 𝙞𝙣 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚?”
after struggling to fall asleep one night, jihoon decides to try his luck at the campsite set up deeper in the forest, away from his drunk members filming content for "seventeen in the soop". what he didn't expect was to run into you. mysterious, enchanting, you. part of the enchantress of the forest series. read part two here!
♡ PLAYERS - lee jihoon x f.reader
♡ WORD COUNT - 7.0K
♡ TAGS - fantasy au, faerie!reader, fluff, minor angst, smut (MDNI): implied virgin!reader, unprotected sex
♡ NOTES - hi again :) so, this is not part of my taylor swift x seventeen collection, but i just couldn't get myself to sit and write for those stories. i was rewatching ITS season 1 and then inspiration struck so... i ended up writing this instead!
it's also my first time writing smut, so i apologize if it's not very good
also, i'm thinking about starting a permanent taglist, so if anyone wants to be on it, please drop a request in the ask box! thank you! I hope you enjoy!
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It amazed Jihoon every time how loud his members could be, despite the size of the space they were in. It’s one thing to be able to hear Mingyu and Seungcheol bickering in the kitchen from his bedroom in their apartment, but how is it that he can hear Soonyoung screaming from the dining hall while he’s in the upper house? That’s a whole separate building. Not to mention they are in a literal forest, with so much vast space, yet that man’s voice still carries. Every door and window in the upper house was closed, for God’s sake. Jihoon even has on Hansol’s headphones with a pillow mashed to them, and he still can’t fall asleep. It’s just too loud. 
Listen, Jihoon understands, ok? Karaoke, drunk karaoke at that, is meant to be loud and obnoxious. But, he’s been working as an unofficial workout trainer all day to his members who were worried they’d let their diets go too much on this trip. They only had two more days in the soop, and Jihoon wanted nothing more than to add as much sleep to his reservoir as he could since he knew it would be time to grind out in his studio the minute they returned to Seoul.
Jihoon kicked the blankets off his body with a loud groan before swinging his legs to the ground. 
“Jihoonie,” Jeonghan cooed from the other side of the bed. “Can’t sleep?”
Jihoon shot his elder brother with a dry look. “What does it look like?”
“Oof, no need to be so snarky,” Jeonghan teased, turning his phone screen off and placing the device on his chest. “Where are you going?”
Jihoon roughly tugged on a hoodie, uncaring of how his hair was sticking up in clumps. “I’m gonna shove that microphone down Soonyoung’s throat,” he griped. 
“Yeah, I don’t think so.” Jeonghan was sitting up by this point and digging around in the closet. “Here,” he chucked a duffel bag at Jihoon, who caught it with a grunt. “Take this and go down to the campsite by the stream. Joshua and I slept down there last night when the very intense foot volleyball match was happening. Very peaceful. No screaming K-idols. Highly recommend.”   
Jihoon shot him a grossed out look. “You really expect me to believe you two snuck away to a secluded tent for peace and quiet to sleep?” The blush creeping up the blonde’s ears was enough of an answer for Jihoon. “Yeah, thanks, but no thanks.” He dropped the duffel bag with a thud. 
“Oh, don’t be ridiculous Ji,” Jeonghan scolded, arms crossed over his chest, half in embarrassment and half in annoyance. “We brought the soiled sleeping bag home. The one left behind is clean. That duffel bag has all the essentials: water, snacks, extra clothes. Everything you need for a good night’s sleep. Go, light a fire, enjoy nature. Maybe you’ll find some inspiration for our next album.” The wink he sent Jihoon seemed a bit suspicious, as if he knew something more than he was letting on. 
Too exhausted to question him any further, Jihoon picked the duffel bag up off the floor and headed out the door. 
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The trek to the campsite was silent, and Jihoon was thankful. He couldn’t remember the last time he could hear himself just breathe. When he was in Seoul he was either rehearsing with the members or in his studio. When he was in his studio, he was always making music or listening to guides. Come to think of it, Jihoon rarely slept without noise. So what was he thinking wandering off into the forest in search of sleep? Maybe he should’ve put up with Sooonyoung’s drunk crooning. 
Suddenly, the smell of burning wood and the sound of crackling fire overtook his senses. Is someone else here? Jihoon thought. It couldn’t be any of the members. They were all drinking or asleep. He started walking quicker, the campsite more visible the closer he got to it. There was definitely a bonfire lit by the tent, and Jihoon was pretty sure he could see the silhouette of a person sitting on the log near it, their back facing him with waist length hair that shimmered like glitter. Definitely not a member. 
“Excuse me?” Jihoon called out, now merely feet from the campsite. The unknown woman turned to look over her shoulder and Jihoon felt his breath catch in his throat. Whoever this girl was, she was glowing, literally. Like a star, she had pure white light surrounding her body. 
Big, doe eyes blinked at him. “Hello.” You only said one word, but your silvery voice left Jihoon in awe. There was silence for a few minutes before you cocked your head questioningly. “You are?”
Jihoon snapped out of his reverie, clearing his throat as he looked away, willing his face not to flush with color. “I’m Ji-” he stopped, appalled. He almost gave his identity away to a total stranger. You could be a sasaeng for all he knows and here he was ready to spew out his social security number if you asked, all because he thought you were beautiful. “I’m the owner of this camp,” he said, firmly, “and you are?”
“Liar,” you stood up, the white, satin dress adorning your body swishing delicately around your calves as you walked towards Jihoon. “The owners are the two men who were here the night before. You,” you came to a still directly in front of Jihoon, “are not either of them.”
Jihoon sighed, crossing his arms over his chest. “Those were my friends, we share this area. That doesn’t matter though because you obviously don’t own this area-”
“False,” you cut in, and Jihoon would’ve been irritated if he didn’t find your melodious voice so soothing. “While I may not own these objects,” you gracefully extended an arm towards the camp set-up, “this land does in fact belong to me.”
Jihoon raised a skeptical eyebrow. “You own the forest?”
“This part of it, yes,” you said, candidly. 
“What? Do you work for the Korea Forest Service or something?” Jihoon laughed, disbelievingly. You simply gave him a confused look. Jihoon huffed, walking towards the tent so he could toss the duffel bag inside. “Listen, you can stop with the games now. I know you were probably hired by Jeonghan and Joshua to prank me or something so let’s just say you got me, ok? Ha ha, that was so funny, I totally fell for it, you can go home now.”
“I’m not quite sure who Jeonghan and Joshua are, but I can assure you this is not a joke. This part of the forest belongs to me,” you called out, eyes following Jihoon as he messed around at the entrance of the tent. 
“God, why do you have to be so stubborn? Are you seriously not gonna leave until you’re done playing the part? Fine,” Jihoon turned to face you again, faking a surprised look. “Oh, you’re a government official? Please don’t arrest me.” He held his hands up by his head to really sell it.
You did not understand the joke. Instead, you simply straightened your posture and clasped your hands in front of you. “I am not a government official. I am Y/N, a forest nymph.”
There was a pause before Jihoon burst into laughter. He bent forward, clutching his stomach as he laughed and laughed, all while you stood there, watching him blankly. 
“You do not believe me.” It was a statement, not a question.
“Wow,” Jihoon flicked a tear from his eye. “I don’t know if the hyungs told you to say that or if it was improv. Either way, bravo, you really got me there.” He started to walk towards you. “A forest nymph, now the all white outfit makes sense. How did they get this glow around you, do you have some sort of glow in the dark paint on?” Jihoon reached out as if to touch your forearm. 
You stepped back, your right arm shooting out to your side, two fingers flicking upwards as if directing something towards Jihoon. At that very moment, a dark green vine shot up from the ground and wrapped around his wrist, preventing Jihoon’s hand from touching you. 
“What the hell?” he exclaimed, eyes wide in incredulity as he stared at the vines coiling around his arms and legs. Then he moved his glare to you. “What is going on?”
You brought your hands together in front of your body once more. “As I said, I am a forest nymph. You have not only trespassed on my land, but have also tried to touch me without my consent. In the land of Faerie, this offense is punishable by dismemberment of your arms and legs.” Jihoon began to trash, trying to break free of his binds. “But,” you proclaimed, louder this time. “As you are human, and seem to be unaware of my kind, I shall let you free. However, if you commit another offense towards me, I will not let you go so easily.”
You willed the vines to loosen from Jihoon’s body as he apologized to you. “I’m sorry, I had no idea you were telling the truth. I thought this was all part of a prank my members orchestrated. I didn’t mean to offend you, I mean it,” he rambled, clearly still shaken by what had just transpired. 
“You are forgiven. I believe you, so do not fret Human,” you strode towards the logs arranged by the fire, dress fluttering around your ankles as you sat. You gestured to the log next to yours, “Please, sit.”
Jihoon sat, noticing the fire was starting to go down. He looked around for extra firewood, but couldn’t find any. He went to stand up, “Let me go find some more wood for the fire.”
“No need,” you held your hand out to the fire, palm facing up. Jihoon watched the fire grow as you curled your fingers into your hand, mesmerized. You noticed and giggled, your tinkling laughter drawing Jihoon’s attention to your eyes. “You behave as if you've never seen magic before.”
“I haven’t,” Jihoon responded. “I didn’t even know faeries were real. I live in Seoul, so unless there are city nymphs…”
You giggled again and shook your head. “There is no such thing as city nymphs. We faeries prefer to stay in our own land, which is in a dimension separate from the human world. Every once in a while, nymphs, such as myself, like to come to the human world to tend to your nature. Forest nymphs care for the trees, flora nymphs help flowers bloom in the spring, water nymphs keep the freshwater running. Of course, there are many other nymphs, but it would take me much too long to explain, and you would likely be bored after hearing me speak for so long.”
Jihoon, who had been entranced by your voice, shouted, “No!” You jumped, startled by the volume of his voice. “I mean, no, I could never get bored listening to you speak. Please, keep going.” A hand shot up to his mouth as Jihoon blushed. He couldn’t believe he’d said all of that. It was like the words just flowed out of his mouth before he could stop them. 
You smiled, adored by this man beside you. “It’s a symptom of being exposed to Faerie magic, the candor. Now that my magic has touched you, you’ll find it a bit difficult to lie to me. It will wear off by morning, so do not worry Sweet Human.”
“It’s Jihoon.” You tilted your head and raised your eyebrows in question. “My name. It’s Jihoon. You can call me Jihoon instead of human.”
“Ah,” you nodded in understanding. “Alright then, Sweet Jihoon.” You gave him a blinding smile. 
Jihoon was unsure whether you were flirting with him, or if it was simply faerie practice to use adjectives before people’s names, but either way, he was sure his cheeks were going to stay pink as long as he was around you. He wondered how Jeonghan and Joshua reacted to you. Suddenly, Jihoon felt his chest begin to tighten. The thought of you speaking, possibly flirting, with his brothers made Jihoon feel…jealous? The realization caught him off guard. He barely knew you, yet here he was, getting jealous at the thought of you interacting with someone that wasn’t him. 
Stop it, Ji, he thought to himself, stop thinking like an incel and get over yourself. 
Jihoon cleared his throat, catching your attention as you turned your face away from the night sky, from the stars you were gazing at. You had a pleasant smile on your face, and for the first time that night, Jihoon noticed you had dimples, as if you were kissed delicately on either cheek by an angel. He felt the sudden urge to do the same. 
“You mentioned the two guys from yesterday, Jeonghan and Joshua. Did you…did you speak to them?” 
Your eyes turned soft and your face filled with longing as you responded, “No. They were surrounded by an aura of love so strong I do not believe they would’ve noticed anyone else around them. I, too, did not have the heart to bother them, so I let them stay.” Jihoon nodded. That sounded like his hyungs, too wrapped up in each other to pay attention to much else. It left Jihoon and the others feeling a bit envious of them and their relationship. 
“Jihoon, have you ever been in love?” 
Jihoon choked on his saliva, surprised by your sudden question. “C-Come again?”
“Have you ever been in love?” 
Your eyes glittered as you looked at him, wide and curious. Jihoon stared back, thinking about your question. “I’ve dated a few girls, I guess, but I wouldn’t say any of it was love. But…” But I might be in love with you, he thought.
You leaned in a bit, “But?” 
You smelled clean, like the morning dew after a night of rain. Jihoon wanted it bottled into a perfume so he could smell it wherever he went. 
“But,” his eyes flicked down to your lips, plush and pink with a perfect cupid’s bow and a slight dent in the middle of your bottom lip. He gulped, and forced himself to pull away, turning his gaze towards the fire. “But maybe someday…” he trailed off.   
He could see you straighten as well from his periphery. A chance glance in your direction told him that you looked slightly disappointed, but he didn’t believe it. Why would you be disappointed by his answer? Why would you care if he was in love?
“What about you? Do faeries fall in love?” Jihoon asked, though he immediately regretted it when you left out a disappointed laugh. The light surrounding you dimmed as a physical indicator of your emotions.
“Faeries mate for life. We believe that Mother Nature has selected a partner for each of us, and we are destined to be together for as long as we live. I suppose humans would call them soulmates.” Your head was bent down, a curtain of shimmering hair hiding your face from Jihoon’s view. You picked at the flower bracelets around your wrists as you spoke. “Everyone in my cohort has met and bonded with their mates. I have not. They all believe the person fated for me does not exist, and I believe the same.” You sniffled, and the sound shattered Jihoon’s heart. 
“Y/N,” he said, in an effort to comfort you. 
“It’s alright, Jihoon,” you looked up at him with a smile despite the tears that brimmed your eyes. “I have nature, I have my forest. I have the trees and the birds and the insects and the deer. I do not need a faerie mate to be happy. I am alright, will be alright, without one.”
“Or maybe your fated mate isn’t a faerie,” Jihoon mumbled under his breath, hoping you hadn’t heard.  
The slight shock on your face said otherwise. “What did you say?”
Jihoon turned to face you completely, looking you in the eyes. “Maybe you aren’t meant to be with a faerie. Look, I don’t know how faerie rules work when it comes to interracial, or I guess inter-species, relationships, but I know this pull I feel towards you isn’t something to be taken lightly. Ever since I saw you, I’ve felt this thrumming in my heart that I’ve never felt before, like it’s calling out to you. I want to hold you and touch you and kiss you. I want to stay up all night and keep talking with you because I’m afraid. Afraid that you won’t be there in the morning. Or worse. That I’ll wake up in the room at the upper house and find out I dreamt the whole thing. I-” Jihoon broke off with a smile, a small laugh escaping his lips when he saw the astonished look on your face. He reached a hand out, as if to touch your face, before dropping it back down to his lap. “You asked me if I’d ever been in love. I think I might be right now. I think I might be in love with you.”
The air around you was charged and silent. Even the plants and fauna were still, as if awaiting your answer with a bated breath. After about ten seconds had passed, Jihoon was a bit anxious. Maybe he shouldn't have said anything. Maybe this was all too much for you, finding out that a mere human was in love with you. What was he thinking, proclaiming his love to a faerie. You’re a whole otherworldly being, way out of his league! What if you were disgusted? Oh God, what if you decided to take him to Faerieland so he could be punished? What if-
Cool, soft hands cupped his cheeks, pulling him from his thoughts. All he got was a glimpse of glimmering eyes before he felt soft lips being pressed into his. He froze. You were kissing him. You were really kissing him. Your lips, soft as rose petals, were on his own. Until they weren’t.
You had pulled away, unsure of your actions considering Jihoon wasn’t kissing you back. “I’m sorry,” you whispered, hands still on his face. “Was I not supposed to do that?”
Jihoon couldn’t help but laugh, his right hand coming up to cup your cheek while the other tucked a lock of silky hair behind your ear. “It was perfect. Can we kiss again?”
You nodded, shyly, letting Jihoon pull you into another kiss. This time, he kissed back, the pressure giving you the courage to move your lips against his own. You gasped when Jihoon’s arms circled your waist, pulling you plush against his chest. You moved your hands to rest on his broad shoulders, your fingers playing with the tips of his hair that curled on the nape of his neck. Jihoon kissed you for what felt like hours before he pulled away, chest heaving as he took big breaths. 
“How are you not out of breath?” Jihoon asked in bewilderment. 
You simply shrugged, tracing his bottom lip with your thumb, awed by how those lips had made you feel more pleasure in a few minutes than you had in your entire lifetime. “I suppose it’s another faerie skill.”
You squealed in delight when Jihoon picked you up and twirled you around. “You are mind blowing, you know that?” He kissed your forehead after setting you down on your feet. “Amazing. Fuck, I think I really love you.” 
You took a hold of Jihoon’s wrist, bringing his palm to your chest, above your heart. Then, you placed your own hand on his. You closed your eyes, concentrating on the beat of his heart. Jihoon watched you silently, his eyes flitting over your face as he committed your features to memory. The brush of your eyelashes against your cheekbones, the gentle slope of your nose, the freckles that dotted your skin. After a few seconds, your eyes shot open, a big grin on your face. 
“Do you feel that?” you asked, in excitement.
“Your heartbeat?” 
You nodded quickly, “Yes! It matches your own.”
Jihoon focused on your hand on his chest, trying to feel his own pulse as it tapped a rhythm against your palm. Each heart beat of his was identical to yours. As your heart picked up speed the more excited you got, his did the same. 
“That’s so cool! What does that mean?” he was smiling widely, your elation contagious.
“It’s how we identify when two people belong to one another in Faerie. Their hearts beat as one. Jihoon,” you were bouncing on your feet now. “We are fated.”
Jihoon could do nothing but dive in to kiss you again. You were laughing as you kissed him, unable to hold back your glee. “I love you,” Jihoon mumbled against your lips. “I love you, I love you.”
“I love you,” you responded, with equal fervor. Faeries did not tell each other of their love. They found no use for words when their hearts proved it. Still, you told Jihoon you loved him in hopes that it would make him as happy to hear it as it did you. 
“Jihoon, my sweet Jihoon,” you looked dazed, as if drunk on the kisses you shared. “Will you show me how much you love me?”
Jihoon, enraptured by the sound of my Jihoon, responded, “Of course, my love, I’ve been showing you all this time.” He bent to rest his head in the crook of your neck, his fingers tracing delicate patterns on your back as he placed a kiss on your collarbone, exposed by the neckline of your dress. 
“No,” you whispered, breath tickling the shell of Jihoon’s ear as you wrapped your arms around his shoulders. “I want you to show me the way the men from last night showed each other. Your friends. As the night went on, the aura around them grew stronger. I want to be loved like that, however they loved each other.”
Jihoon’s body stiffened, before he groaned into your neck. “Fuck, you can’t just say things like that Faerie.”
You pushed Jihoon’s body up so you could look at him. “Why not? What did I say wrong?” You held his hands in yours. 
“Nothing, it’s just- well they-” Jihoon stumbled over his words, a bit embarrassed now that he has to have the birds and the bees talk with you. Unsure of how to broach the topic he decided to go right for it. “Do you know what intercourse is?” Jihoon’s face was flushed bright red, his hands turning clammy in your grip.
“Of course,” you affirmed with a nod. 
“Well,” Jihoon gave you a look. 
You stared for a second before recognition lit in your eyes. You smiled. “Oh!” Your smile dropped. “Oh.”
“Yeah,” Jihoon said, dumbly. 
“But, I do not understand. Were your friends trying to have a child?” 
Jihoon spluttered. “What?? No! Of course not!”
“Then why be intimate?” You asked him, innocently. Jihoon sighed. The cultural differences surrounding intimacy must be far more different than he anticipated. 
“Here,” he tugged at your intertwined hands. The fire has almost completely died by now. “Let’s sit in the tent where it’s warmer and I’ll explain.”
Jihoon ushered you inside, zipping the tent closed before sitting down on the blankets opposite you. “What’s the traditional practice in Faerie, if you want to…procreate,” he cringed internally at his odd word choice.
You did not seem thrown off, however. “After faeries find their mates, they have a ceremony, similar to a human wedding ceremony. The faeries will combine their auras, which allows them to share their powers and essentially become one unified entity. Then, there will be a mating ritual, in which they are intimate. Their auras are most powerful immediately after the ceremony, so that one night is enough to create a child. Faeries do not have more than one.” You explained, methodically. 
Jihoon nodded. “Ok, so Faeries aren’t intimate for pleasure?”
You shook your head, “I suppose not. Humans are, I presume?”
“Yes. Many humans see intercourse as a means of seeking pleasure first, and reproduction second. There are medical advancements that can prevent pregnancy, so humans can be intimate without worrying about children. The guys from last night…They are intimate because they love each other. Make sense?” Jihoon searched your face for a hint of confusion.
“I understand!” you chirped. “Are you someone who correlates intimacy to love, Jihoon?”
At this point Jihoon has no choice but to assume that you say things to make him blush on purpose. “I mean, yeah, I- I guess so,” he stuttered, a complete opposite to your eloquent way of speech. 
“Then, I would like you to be intimate with me.”
His breath hitched. “My love,” Jihoon started, hesitantly. “Are you sure? There’s no rush, we can take things slowly-”
You moved closer to him, your knees pressed against his. “Sweet Jihoon,” you held his hands, stroking the backs of them with your thumbs. “I am unsure what will become of us tomorrow. I must return to Faerie in the morning, and you live in the city, so you will eventually leave as well. I do not want to wait in hopes of a day that may not come soon, if at all. I do not wish to dampen the mood, but it is the harsh truth. That is why I want to do this now. I want to love you completely. Tonight.”
Your eyes were blazing, the grip on his hands firm. You meant what you said. You would not let Jihoon go tonight, not like this. 
“You have to know, I’d do anything for you Y/N. I’d leave Seoul, hell, I’d leave this dimension for you. I’d go to Faerie, go wherever you want,” Jihoon rambled. 
You pressed a finger to his lips. “Hush. We can talk about it all later. Right now,” you leaned in, bumping the tip of his nose with your own, “I want you to…fuck me.”
Your yelp of surprise was swallowed by Jihoon when he surged forward to kiss you. The force pushed you back and you were laying flat on the blankets, Jihoon hovering over your body, his hands braced by your shoulders. You pushed him up with a press to his chest, unable to hold back giggles. 
“What was that for?”
“Where did you learn to say that, you little minx?” Jihoon moved to press butterfly soft kisses to the slope of your neck, moving up towards your ear. 
“I heard,” you gasped at a particularly biting kiss, “I heard the blonde man from yesterday tell his partner that. He seemed to like hearing it.” Your hands were now clasped against your chest as you were unsure what to do with them. 
Jihoon teasingly bit your earlobe. “Ah, didn’t know my innocent forest nymph was actually a voyeur.”
“Jihoon,” you slapped at his shoulder, scandalized. Jihoon pulled away, sitting back on his heels as he laughed. “It was not as if I meant to intrude! I did not know about human customs of love.” There was a slight pout on your lips, as you turned your head to the side, pointedly looking away from Jihoon in embarrassment. 
He couldn’t help but place a kiss on your reddening cheek. “Cute,” he mumbled. “I’m just teasing, Faerie.” He held your chin with two of his fingers and turned you back to face him. “I think you’re cute,” his voice dropped a few pitches, seductively. “Bet you sat up in those trees, listening, wishing it was you that they were touching, hm?” Jihoon ran his fingers up your right leg, tickling your calves. You whimpered. “My poor Faerie felt so lonely. Thought she’d never find someone. But I’m here now,” he pressed a kiss in the dip between your collarbones, “I’ll take care of you baby.”
By now, your dress was rucked up by your knees, Jihoon’s hand splayed out against your thigh. Your hands were tangled in his curls, the grip allowing you to tug him back to your lips. “Jihoon, please,” you whined. 
Jihoon held you by your shoulders as he pulled you up to sit on his lap, your legs wrapping around his hips. “Can I take your dress off?” he asked as he toyed with the straps of your dress. You nodded, demurely. Jihoon slipped the cloth off your right shoulder, pressing a kiss to your skin before doing the same on the other side. Like water, the dress slid down your chest, bunching at your waist when the straps caught on your forearms. You pointedly kept your eyes trained on the neckline of Jihoon’s shirt, feeling a bit too self-conscious to look him in the eyes. Jihoon must’ve understood this. 
“Breathtaking,” he said, trailing a finger along your face, down the side of your neck. “You’re absolutely breathtaking, my love.” His finger dipped into the valley of your breasts before twirling around your left nipple. You whimpered, the sound morphing into a moan when he took the other nipple into his mouth. Your body felt warm and the bottom of your feet were tingling. You’d never felt so good before. Had never imagined you could ever feel like this. 
Jihoon moved to kiss you again as he laid you back down on the ground, helping slip your dress off your body. Even though it had only been a few hours, you were sure you’d never tire of kissing Jihoon. 
You grew more and more impatient as Jihoon slipped his tongue into your mouths, pulling desperately at his clothes. “Why are you wearing so many layers?” Jihoon found your eagerness endearing, the way you wanted his clothes off his body but refused to let him part from your mouth. Somehow, after a few failed attempts and limbs getting awkwardly caught in fabric, you were both naked, bodies pressed tightly together. 
Your arms were gripped like a vice around Jihoon’s neck, loudly whining as you bucked your hips up, trying to find some sort of friction.
“Desperate little thing, aren’t you,” Jihoon chuckled, tauntingly. “Looked so innocent when I first saw you, but you’re really just aching for cock.” Your mewl was indication enough that you liked the way Jihoon was speaking to you.  
“Please, need it. Need you in me now!” you begged. It was too much for Jihoon. The way your hair was splayed around your head like a halo, the way your skin was glistening with a thin layer of sweat from the heat, the way your neck and chest were red from his ministrations. As his gaze slid down your body, he took note of your heaving chest, the smooth skin of your belly, the way your pussy was dripping wet. He couldn't take it anymore. 
“Already so ready for me baby. Don’t even need my fingers or my mouth on you, do you? Bet I could slip right in.”
“Yes,” you wailed. “Please, put it in, please-” you broke off with a cry, hands shooting to grip at Jihoon’s biceps as he pushed into you with a single thrust. 
“Fuck, I’m sorry Faerie, did I hurt you, I didn’t mean to-”
“No, no, felt good, don’t stop Jihoonie,” you babbled, desperate for more. 
Slowly, he pulled out, moving until just the head of his cock was still in you before pushing back in. The strokes were gentle and languid. Your heat was so warm and tight, he felt like he was on cloud nine. Jihoon dropped his head to your neck, licking and kissing at the skin there as you dug your nails into his shoulder blades. 
“Jihoon,” you moaned, feeling overstimulated by the feeling of his lips on your skin, his hands stroking your body, his cock inside you. “Don’t stop, don’t ever stop.”
“Never,” he said vehemently. He pressed his forehead to yours. “Wanna be with you forever. Wanna be inside you forever. Never letting you go after this.” 
You cant your hips up to his, the feeling of your clit grazing his skin adding an extra level of pleasure. 
“Jihoon, feel something, feel pressure,” you gasped. 
Jihoon slipped a hand between your bodies, pressing delicate circles against your clit. “That’s it Faerie, let go. Come for me,” his voice was breathy and strained, as if trying to hold himself together. 
You let out a loud, long-winded moan as you came, your orgasm washing over you in waves. Vivid colors splashed like fireworks against the back of your tightly shut eyes. You threw your head back, arching your body up as if chasing more, more, more. 
You vaguely felt Jihoon pull away, and whined pathetically, too enveloped in this newfound sense of pleasure to do much else. Your chest heaved as you slowly regained awareness, prying your eyes open. The world was blurry, and you realized your eyes were filled with tears. You saw Jihoon begin to stand, and whined as he walked away. 
“Not going anywhere, baby,” he chuckled. “Just gonna clean you up.” He grabbed a washcloth from his bag and wiped away the sweat and fluid on your body. He tossed the cloth to a corner of the tent, along with the blanket he was sitting on that seemed to be stained with something white. 
Jihoon laid down beside you, gathering you in his arms. You whimpered a bit, your skin sensitive everywhere, as if every nerve ending was exposed to Jihoon’s touch. Your head rested against his heart as you traced silly patterns on his abdomen.  
“I meant what I said earlier,” Jihoon said, the vibration of his chest tickling your cheek. “I want to stay with you. I don’t want to leave.” 
You sighed. “I know, my sweet, but we must part. It is inevitable. We are from different worlds. However,” you lifted your head, “I have a plan. I will request an audience with the Queen come morning, and request to give up my powers, so that I may become human.”
Jihoon began to argue, “No, Y/N, I can’t ask you to do that.”
You shook your head firmly. “You are not asking me for anything. This is my decision. There is nothing waiting for me in Faerie, Jihoon. I do not have family, and anyone who I would consider a friend has a mate of their own. Here, in the human world, I have you.” You placed a hand gently to his heart, letting the steady beat relax you. “I want to be with you. Eat with you, sleep with you. I want to meet your friends and your family. I want to build a life with you here. That is all I desire.” 
Jihoon still looked hesitant, worried that you may not completely understand the depth of what you were saying. “Y/N, to give up the only world, the only life, you’ve ever known…are you sure you want that? Are there no consequences?”
You cut him off with a kiss. “That is nothing for you to worry your beautiful head about. For now, let us sleep.” 
Jihoon watched curiously as you placed a hand to the bottom of the tent. Suddenly, the ground beneath him started to feel soft, as if he was laying on a cloud, not solid ground. Through the white cloth, he could faintly see the yellow and green shades of moss and grass growing to create a makeshift bed. You laid back down, pressing one last kiss to his lips. “Good night, Sweet Jihoon.”
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You awoke at the first sign of daybreak the next morning. It was time to return to Faerie, but you were in high spirits. You have a purpose this time: to fight for your freedom and return to Jihoon. 
You gently brushed the strands of hair away from his forehead as you cooed his name to wake him. Jihoon’s eyes fluttered open, lips splitting into a wide grin when he caught sight of you. 
“Morning beautiful,” his voice was raspy and deep. You felt the sudden urge to repeat last night’s events. You clambered to your feet, dusting off the skirt of your dress you had thrown on when you woke up. No, there was no time to fall back into the sheets with your lover. You had a job to do. 
“It’s time for me to go,” you said, faintly, holding Jihoon’s hand as you led him out of the tent into the cool morning air. He then wrapped you up in his arms and kissed you, lips slightly chapped from the chilly night air. 
“When can I see you again?” He brushed his thumb over your cheekbone. 
“Give me one year. In exactly one year’s time, I will be here again, whether it be with good news or bad news. Should the Queen grant my wish, I shall return home with you. Should the Queen not grant my wish…” you looked away, “I will return for just an hour, to tell you goodbye.” 
Jihoon nodded, knowing there was nothing he could say to change your mind. “One year then. I’ll be here, waiting.” 
As you stared at the grass, something caught your eye. Quickly, you bent down to pluck a lone dandelion flower from the ground. After analyzing it for a while, you placed it in the palm of your hand, enveloping the flower with shimmering white light. Then, you twisted the stem into a ring, before taking Jihoon’s left hand, and sliding the flower ring onto his pinky finger, opposite the silver ring on his other hand. “This flower is enchanted, and will never wilt. I hope it will serve as a reminder of me, so you never forget this time we shared.”
Jihoon caught your hands, holding them tightly. “You know I will never forget you. But, thank you. I will treasure it forever.”
You nodded, eyes welling with tears as you leaned in to press one last kiss to Jihoon’s lips. “See you in one year, my Sweet Jihoon.” 
You stepped back, fingers slipping from his hold. 
“See you in a year.” 
With that you turned to walk into the forest. Jihoon watched until your silhouette disappeared into thin air.
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“Hyung!” Seungkwan called, shaking Jihoon out of his stupor. Somehow, he had walked all the way from the camp back to the main houses. He didn’t remember a single moment of the trek. “You’re back! Come on, we have to wrap up shooting!”
Oh, that’s right, the broadcast, Jihoon thought, desolately. We are going back to Seoul tonight. 
Jihoon silently trudged into the upper house, all his members watching. 
“What happened to him?” Seungcheol demanded, glaring at Jeonghan accusingly. 
The blonde held his hands up defensively. “Me? Why do you assume I did something?”
“You’re the one who sent him to the tent last night! Now look, he came back more depressed than ever!” 
Jeonghan glanced at Joshua, the two sharing a silent look of confusion. “We’ll go check on him,” the latter said to placate Seungcheol. 
Together, the two boys went into the house, noticing Jihoon belly flopped onto the bed. 
“Oh, Jihoonie, what’s wrong?” Jeonghan sat on the edge of the bed, patting the younger reassuringly on the back. 
Jihoon mumbled something incoherent into the pillows. 
The two older boys exchanged another glance, as if urging the other to say something. Finally, Joshua sighed. “We thought you would’ve enjoyed the company waiting at the campsite. That’s why Jeonghan sent you there last night. We are really sorry if that was the wrong call.”
Jihoon shot up straight, turning to level his members with a glare. “What do you mean by company? You two knew? About Y/N?!”  
“Ah, so that’s her name,” Jeonghan said. “We noticed a girl sitting, well hiding, up in the trees when we first got there. She had this mystical air around her, we figured she was something nonhuman.” He turned to Joshua, who shrugged.
“Yeah and, I don’t know, she seemed so lonely. Reminded us of you, so we thought why not have you go the next night? If she returned, you’d meet. If not, then you’d get some good rest. So, win-win.” He then climbed onto the bed to take a seat by Jihoon, wrapping an arm around his shoulders in a side hug. “What happened last night Ji?”
Jihoon began to recount the story to the two men, starting from when he met you to when you left. All of it. By the end, Joshua was giving him a sympathetic hug, while Jeonghan had a determined look in his eyes. 
“Well,” the blonde clapped his hands together. “Looks like we have no choice but to return next year then!” He shot Jihoon a wink. “Let me go tell the other boys!” He ran from the room. 
Jihoon stared with his mouth wide open as Joshua sighed. “What he means to say is, we’ll set up a meeting with the producers. No matter what, we’ll get you back here in a year so you can see her Jihoon. It seems like Y/N is pretty optimistic that everything is going to work out, so you should be too.” With one final caring pat to the back of his head, Joshua too left the room. 
As Jihoon sat alone, thinking about what his brothers had said, he heard raucous laughter and cheering coming from outside. It seemed like Jeonghan had told everyone else the news about them returning. Jihoon let out an endeared laugh. He knew that he would have to tell the rest of the boys about you, and that they would be nothing but supportive. Jihoon stood from the bed, his confidence in seeing you again growing. 
In a year, he’d return here and bring you home with him. With a hopeful smile, he placed a kiss on his flower ring and headed out to meet his friends. 
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nevernonline · 6 months
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✧.* seventeen masterlist ✧.*
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one shots;
remind me; wen junhui x reader.
remember when you spent the night with your best friend? or do you need a reminder of what it was like all these years later
sweet disposition; hong jisoo x reader.
the innocence of youth, isn't it blissful? your youth was your childhood crush, joshua. a pretty boy from your hometown who became your best friend.
change my mind; kim mingyu x reader.
you were an enigma. mingyu knew you to be not afraid of anything, except for falling in love.
just for one night; yoon jeonghan x reader.
for jeonghan's birthday he teased the gift he wanted wrapped in a pretty bow this time was you. little did he know that his joke would turn into his favorite present.
crash into me; lee seokmin x reader.
Lee Dokyeom was your closest friend. After a friendly dinner you head back to his apartment, to play a game little did you know it would crash the friendship barrier between you two.
written series;
means something; choi seungcheol x reader.
Choi Seungcheol used to be the bane of your existence, but through a year of seasonal rotations, something felt different. It has to be overwhelming realizing you could fall for the person you always thought you hated.
ninety minute movies; svt one shot series.
smau series;
grow as we go; svt x reader.
synopsis: over the past ten years you've fallen in love many times. one day someone happens to stumble across your journal sitting out on your nightstand and started posting your entries online. after all of your secrets are leaked it's clear things would ever be the same again.
pancakes for dinner?; seungcheol x reader.
✧.* synopsis: y/n while in her third year at greenwood international university  finally gets an opportunity to move off campus into a new complex, the only problem is having her childhood crush as a new next door neighbor.
head cannons;
seventeen as songs from 1989 (taylors version.)
seventeen as thirteen reasons why.
seventeen vocal unit as the five love languages.
seventeen hip hop unit as the four seasons.
svt ask recommendations;
svt tags;
seventeen
seungcheol
jeonghan
joshua
junhui
hoshi
wonwoo
jihoon
seokmin
mingyu
minghao
seungkwan
vernon
chan
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ahlovelightaflame · 7 months
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Seventeen Recommendations ~ OT13
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Confessions Gone Wrong (Vocal Unit) by @sukisdeliveryservice
Vocal Unit as Demigods by @clareisa
Hip Hop Unit as Demigods by @clareisa
How Seventeen Helps Their Mentally Exhausted S/O by @fairyhaos
How Seventeen Would Act as a Webtoon Fantasy World Prince by @fairyhaos
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ellaak · 2 months
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SEVENTEEN RECOMMENDATION LIST
✉~Smau ✏~Written Series 🃁~Oneshot ☆~Headcanon ♡~Fluff ☔︎︎~Angst ☊~Crack ⌧~MDNI
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CHOI SEUNGCHEOL Nothing Here Yet...
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YOON JEONGHAN The Unoriginal Villain Origin Story 🃁 ~ ♡ ~ ☊ @twogyuu Miscommunication is a powerful plot weapon fr. This fic is good Daisies 🃁 ~ ☔︎︎ ~ ♡ @viastro I WAS NOT PREPARED FOR THIS EMOTIONAL FIC, MINJI IS EVIL Fake It Til You Make It 🃁 ~ ♡ @bitterie-sweetie THE FACT THAT THEY HAD EVERYONE FOOLED FOR YEARS Just One Day 🃁 ~ ☔︎︎ ~ ♡ @wonwoonlight STOP THIS WAS SO CUTE AND SAD.
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JOSHUA HONG My Favorite Person 🃁 ~ ♡ @babyleostuff This fic giving me advice too
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WEN JUNHUI HOME 🃁 ~ ☔︎︎ ~ ♡ @hazz-a-bear BREAKING MY HEART IN TWO. JUN :((
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KWON SOONYOUNG Nothing Here Yet...
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JEON WONWOO Nothing Here Yet...
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LEE JIHOON Nothing Here Yet...
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LEE SEOKMIN Nothing Here Yet...
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KIM MINGYU Nothing Here Yet...
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XU MINGHAO The Letter 🃁 ~ ☔︎︎ ~ ♡ @toruro This is definitely a must read Blocked Contacts 🃁 ~ ♡ @jae-bummer Annoying exs Painting 🃁 ~ ♡ @rubywonu Who says you can't find love in museums His Portrait 🃁 ~ ♡ @ahlovelightaflame Getting caught was embarrassing but at least we got something
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BOO SEUNGKWAN You Say The Stupidest (Sweetest) Things 🃁 ~ ♡ @savventeen The concept was so cute When I Grow Up 🃁 ~ ☔︎︎ ~ ♡ @wooahaes THE WAY THEY MET HAS ME GUSHING Mission Possible 🃁 ~ ♡ @thepixelelf Sujeong was the op this whole fic The First Step 🃁 ~ ♡ @bluehoodiewoozi SEUNGKWAN WAS SUCH A SWEETHEART
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CHWE HANSOL Nothing Here Yet...
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LEE CHAN Nothing Here Yet...
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OT13 seventeen and how they would launch their relationship with idol!you ☆ ~ ♡ @hrts4hanniehae Fun to read Together 🃁 ~ ☔︎︎ ~ ♡ @wooahaes This was so sweet, crying at the end REDAMANCY ✉ ~ ☔︎︎ ~ ♡ - Minghao & Junhui @escapewriter I knew there was something off about [Redacted] since the beginning
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fantasyescapes17 · 1 year
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Manners (Part 1)
Viscount Joshua Hong is by far the most eligible bachelor in London. Rich, handsome, and renowned for his excellent manners and refined tastes. Young woman would kill for the chance to be the Viscount's chosen bride. But nobody can quite determine which of the young ladies he prefers, and you are beginning to have your doubts. Is the Viscount really as gentlemanly as the ton seems to think?
Genre: Joshua Hong x Female!reader. Regency!AU (It's sort of Bridgerton-esque in the sense that I give zero attention to historical accuracy and prioritize aesthetics lmao) You are a sibling to all the Lees (Woozi, DK, Dino) so your last name is Lee but the reader has no other specific characteristics, physical or otherwise.
Word Count: 3.2k+
Part 2
Series Masterlist [I would highly recommend reading the earlier stories in this series, Patience, and Candle, before this one but it's not strictly necessary.]
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It was a warm evening in June when your life suddenly changed. 
You had, at that point, been out in London society for almost two years without having received a single marriage proposal. Being the third child and eldest daughter of the Lee family, your responsibilities were far greater than your charms. 
Most young ladies your age possessed a bountiful dowry and carefully developed talents to attract a husband. Instead, you possessed the responsibility of managing five siblings, an absentee father, and a mediocre dowry. Only three of the siblings were younger than you (but really, from the way he sometimes behaved, Seokmin might as well have been younger than you). 
Mr. Lee (your father) was often away and busy managing affairs of the estate. He had ceased to care for society or matrimony since the death of your beloved mother. The responsibility of ensuring your siblings were raised well had naturally fallen on you, the eldest daughter. You did not entirely resent the circumstances. You loved all your siblings equally- even sullen Jihoon and cheeky little Chan- but your future was quite clear. 
You would probably end up an old maid. 
Or you would have, if not for that fateful June evening when Viscount Joshua Hong appeared unannounced on the doorstep of your London home. 
—----------------------------------------------------------
The kitchens were in an uproar. 
“These noblemen are quite careless!” the cook cried out as she struggled angrily to light the large coal fire. “To come around unannounced for dinner-the Viscount, you say- oh, what am I supposed to serve him? I was going to prepare a simple soup and fish for the family supper but that will certainly not suffice for a Viscount!”
You tried in vain to calm the cook. 
“Really, Dotty, it is all right- I am sure the Viscount will not demand anything more than what we usually eat,” you told her gently. 
“Of course he will not demand it- I am quite aware that the Viscount Joshua Hong has the most excellent manners. He should likely eat stale bread without complaint if we served it to him. But how would I ever be able to live with myself if I did that? Oh- how unfortunate that the Viscount should come for supper on the one night when there is no venison to be had…��
There was no calming the cook down. You sighed. 
“Dotty, I must go upstairs to dress for dinner. Please do not worry and serve whatever you are able. The Viscount is a good friend of Jihoon and he will not mind a simple supper after having arrived unannounced.” 
Dotty gave you a miserable look. “I should very much have liked to serve the Viscount my venison pie…”
You laughed. “I shall ask Jihoon to invite him to dinner again soon; and you shall be told well in advance so that you can serve your venison pie. But soup and fish will do for tonight.” 
“Yes, miss…” 
You left the kitchens through the back entrance and hurried up to the bedchambers through a side corridor; carefully avoiding the drawing room where Viscount Hong sat in conversation with your father and older brothers. 
It was perfectly understandable that Dotty had panicked when the Viscount suddenly appeared at the doorstep of your London home to call on your brothers. 
Viscount Joshua Hong was not only one of the richest noblemen in London, he was also the most handsome eligible bachelor. He was the epitome of impeccable manners and fine breeding. The entire ton had been waiting with bated breath ever since it had become public knowledge that he was in search of a wife. 
You could not deny that you were equally curious. Any young lady that could catch the eye of Viscount Hong would surely be perfection incarnate. You could not think of a single woman that could compare. Perhaps the Duchess of Graham? Even she did not possess Viscount Hong's excellent manners. 
As you reached the top of the stairs, you discovered that the entrance to your bedroom was barred by two of your younger siblings. Chan looked upset and angry, while little Nessie looked delighted. 
You took a deep breath and prepared yourself for the onslaught. 
“Why am I not allowed to sit with the gentleman downstairs?” demanded Chan, at the same time that Nessie cried, “Is it true Viscount Hong is here? Does he really have a golden carriage?"
You ushered them into your room before their loud voices could carry downstairs to the drawing room. 
"You are not yet old enough to sit with the gentlemen," you told Chan firmly, before turning to Nessie. "Yes, Viscount Hong is here and you will be allowed to see him at supper. No, his carriage is not made of real gold."
"I'm sixteen-" Chan protested.
"Sixteen is not old enough."
"It's too old to be sitting upstairs with the girls," Chan insisted with a pout. 
You sighed. "Stay upstairs for now. After supper, if Father permits, you may sit with the gentlemen," you told him. "Now go dress for supper quickly. Both of you."
You called for your maid to help you dress and then wrestled little Nessie and Lily into appropriate gowns. Fortunately, Chan managed to make himself look presentable on his own and you were able to get them all downstairs in time for supper.
The gentlemen were already seated for dinner; your father at the head of the table and Viscount Hong to his right along with your brothers- Mr. Lee Jihoon and Mr. Lee Seokmin. 
"Remember to curtsey," you reminded your little sisters quietly. 
They both curtsied prettily for the benefit of Viscount Hong, who greeted you and your younger siblings warmly with a handsome smile and bright eyes. He was characteristically patient when little Lily suddenly threw a tantrum and insisted on being allowed to sit beside him. 
"I will sit beside the Viscount, you never allow me to sit beside the Viscount!" Lily cried, stomping your feet. You laughed nervously, taking your six-year old sister gently by the arm. 
"Come now, Lily, I've told you before that you must behave when we have company-" you scolded lightly. 
"I should very much like to sit beside Lily," Viscount Hong said with a kind smile, before turning to your father quickly. "Unless, sir, you should have any objection."
Your father waved a hand dismissively. "Let the child sit where she likes, we must get on with dinner."
Jihoon surrendered his seat to little Lily and moved around the table to sit beside you instead. You lowered your voice and mumbled in a low voice to your elder brother. 
"Of course we are delighted to have the Viscount here for dinner, it's not that anyone dislikes his company," you mumbled. "But perhaps you could ask him to give us notice next time? Dotty was quite a mess about what to serve for dinner."
Jihoon coughed into his napkin. 
"I don't know why he is even here," your brother whispered. "It's quite unlike Joshua. He is usually incredibly well-mannered but really, neither Seokmin nor I invited him here tonight and he simply won't leave."
You looked at your brother in surprise- you had thought that the Viscount was surely here to discuss urgent business with your brothers or father. 
"Oh…"
The servants entered with dinner, so your conversation with Jihoon was cut short. You were forced to turn your attention to the Viscount, who sat opposite you and was listening patiently to a fairy tale that Lily was reciting. 
"Lily, stop boring the Viscount," Chan scolded her lightly. He turned to the older gentleman with bright eyes. "Viscount Hong, is it true that you have five thoroughbred horses and three pure white Arabian horses in your stables? And that the Arabians were brought from overseas?"
Joshua smiled. "Yes, that is correct. Are you interested in horses, Chan?"
Chan flushed. "I've studied them a little."
"He's studied them far more than he's studied mathematics," you said lightly. Chan frowned but Viscount Hong's dark eyes flickered towards you in amusement. He gave you a small smile. 
"I see your sister doesn't like your interest in horses," Joshua remarked.
"My sister doesn't like anything interesting," Chan complained and you nearly choked on your soup in embarrassment before giving your younger brother a stern look.
"Chan! "
But Joshua only turned to look at you with his usual kind smile. "If you can vouch for Chan having completed his mathematics, Miss Lee, then I should be glad to invite him to visit our stables next week to see the horses."
Chan's eyes widened in delight and he jumped out of his seat. 
"Viscount Hong, would you really-"
"I believe the Viscount said the invitation was dependent upon you completing your mathematics," you reminded your brother calmly. "So sit down and finish your dinner. And thank you, Viscount Hong, I would not want us to intrude upon your hospitality."
Viscount Hong smiled. "I do not consider it an intrusion. It is the least I can do."
"We are grateful, all the same."
Your father cleared his throat as he finished his soup. The senior Mr. Lee was not generally a social man, but even he could not ignore the need to engage in polite conversation when there was a man of such noble standing as the Viscount at his table. 
"Were you in attendance at the Hastings' ball yesterday, Viscount Hong?" your father asked. "My children tell me it was quite a wonderful event. And since you are looking for a wife, I suppose attending these events is of more importance than ever."
Joshua nodded respectfully at your father.
"Indeed, sir, I was in attendance. In fact- I was fortunate enough to have danced once with your daughter," Joshua replied with a small smile. 
You nodded. Viscount Hong was very much an in-demand dance partner, but you were grateful that he had still asked you to dance with him a number of times over the course of the season. You knew better than to read too much into a mere dance, however. Joshua also regularly danced with plenty of women far more eligible than you- Miss Jeon, the Duchess of Graham, Miss Williams, Miss Yoon…
It was a long list that you did not care to repeat. 
Mr. Lee nodded. "Yes- I am sure my daughter is quite grateful for your company."
You flushed in embarrassment at the implication that the Viscount had danced with you out of pity, but the topic of conversation was quickly rerouted by Chan- who had been unable to take his mind off the horses. 
"Viscount Hong, when you said that I might visit your stables next week," Chan pressed eagerly. "Which day of the week were you suggesting, as I have my lessons on Thursdays…"
You frowned. "Chan!"
Viscount Hong laughed. "It is quite all right, Miss Lee. Shall we say Wednesday, Chan?"
"Wednesday sounds excellent…"
The supper passed in a pleasant manner. Joshua's unannounced arrival was certainly not convenient but you had to admire how smoothly the gentleman blended himself into your family supper. He was polite, but without showing any of the airs and superiority that someone of his station could have displayed around your family. 
He showed enthusiasm for Lily's stories, patiently answered Chan's questions about horses and even joked around with Jihoon and Seokmin, whom he had known for many years. You knew that Viscount Joshua Hong was as far, far, far out of your reach as a man could possibly be but…
Well, there was no harm in silently admiring such a wonderful specimen of the opposite gender, was there? 
You ushered your sisters upstairs to bed after dinner. Chan, stubborn as ever, insisted on being allowed to stay in the drawing room while the gentlemen smoked a pipe. You left him be: disciplining Chan was quite out of your hands and you had decided that you would begin to leave it to Jihoon. 
You had just put the girls to bed and were about to undress for bed yourself when there was a frantic knocking at your door.
You opened the door, startled. 
"Chan?" 
Your brother was pink in the face and his eyes wide as he squeezed inside your room and closed the door behind him. 
"Shhh! You will not believe what is happening downstairs!" Chan hissed. 
You raised an eyebrow. "What is it?"
"We were all in the drawing room- and suddenly Viscount Hong and Father went into Father's study alone. Even Jihoon and Seokmin agreed that it was extremely strange for them to go off alone so I snuck into the study to listen in on their conversation and-"
"Chan!" you scolded him. "You cannot be eavesdropping on Father's-"
"You may scold me later! Only listen for now- Viscount Hong has asked father for permission to offer for your hand!" Chan whisper-yelled. 
You froze. 
"Sorry, my what?" you asked. 
"Your hand," Chan repeated. "In marriage?" he added unhelpfully. 
Your face felt hot. "Don't be foolish. You must have misunderstood their conversation. Viscount Hong would certainly marry a woman more suited to his station. To even suggest otherwise is nonsense-"
Chan looked angry. "I know what I heard, sister! He clearly said 'I seek your blessing to offer for your daughter's hand'- and surely, he is not intending to marry Lily!"
"He is not intending to marry me either-"
There was another sharp knock on your door and both you and Chan jumped, startled. You opened it to find a maid standing outside and she greeted you with a bow. 
"Miss Lee- your father has requested you to come downstairs to his study."
—-----------------------------------------------
You went downstairs in a mixture of disbelief and anxiety. It was impossible that Viscount Joshua Hong had made an offer for your hand- Chan meant well but he was hardly the most brilliant young boy of his age. He had clearly misunderstood something. 
You entered your father's study anxiously. 
"Father?"
Mr. Lee stood from his desk. Joshua was seated quietly on a chair across from it- his expression was unreadable. 
"Ah-daughter. Here you are. I believe the Viscount has something to say to you. I am afraid I left my pipe in the drawing room so I shall return to it. You may both converse here in my study."
And your father briskly left the room, closing the study door behind him and leaving you entirely alone with Viscount Hong. 
Oh no. 
Oh no. 
"Miss Lee?" Viscount Hong asked you gently as you stared frozen at the now closed study door. He stood and stepped closer to you. "Would you like to take a seat?"
You turned to face him sharply. 
"What is the meaning of this?" you demanded. 
Viscount Hong gave you a small smile. He seemed a little surprised by your sharp reaction but reached for your bare hand- you were not wearing gloves so his soft fingers glided over your knuckles- and gently drew you closer to himself. 
"Miss Lee. I suppose the present circumstances make my object in speaking to you here quite evident, but I will still pose the question to you," Joshua said slowly. His hand pressed yours. "Would you do me the honour of becoming my wife?"
You felt faint. You could not make sense of what was happening. 
"But-but…" you stuttered awkwardly. "But why?"
Joshua looked taken aback. 
"Why?" he repeated. 
"Why would you want to marry me?" you cried.
Joshua let out a small, bewildered laugh. Your question seemed to amuse him. "Well- for the very reasons that any man would want to marry a woman, I suppose. For love! Should I perhaps have started with that instead of directly jumping to marriage?"
"Yes-I mean no-, I mean…" you trailed off and pulled your hand out of his grasp before moving to learn against the study table. "Oh my god, I feel rather faint."
Joshua followed you, concerned. 
"Do you need help-"
"I am fine," you brushed him off. Your heart was beating at an unnaturally fast rate and you worried that it might suddenly explode in your chest. "I just… I don't really know what to say…"
Joshua took a step back from you warily. 
"Am I to understand from your reaction," he began slowly and carefully, "that my affections are unwelcome?"
"No, not… not unwelcome, exactly, more shocking," you replied hastily. You took a deep breath and tried to calm yourself down and digest this strange situation that you had suddenly been thrust into. "Viscount Hong, do you expect me to believe that out of all the beautiful, talented and rich young ladies of the ton, you are in love with me?"
The Viscount slowly kneeled in front of you and took your hand into his once more, with a soft smile. 
"I thought you would have noticed my affections. Perhaps I concealed them better than I imagined. I believed that my admiration for you was quite evident," Joshua said quietly. 
"Clearly it was not," you told him firmly. "I have it on quite good authority that there is a running bet in the assembly rooms regarding which young lady the eligible Viscount Hong will propose to by the end of the season, and I can tell you with absolute confidence that not a single person has put their money on me! Even Seokmin has placed his bet on the Duchess of Graham!"
Joshua took a deep breath and nodded. 
"I see my mistake."
"Do you?" you asked weakly. 
"Yes," Joshua replied simply. He stood up and stepped back from you. "I thought it was prudent to be a little more… guarded about displaying my affections for you in public but I see now that I should not have held back so much. You did not even realise you were being courted."
You stared at him. "I… I do not think anyone realised, Viscount Hong."
Joshua's cheeks flushed pink. "Yes- well. Allow me to remedy my mistake. I will retract my offer for your hand for the moment, Miss Lee, as I see now that I have been hasty. And instead, I seek permission to enter into a formal courtship with you."
"Ah…"
"I will court you for one month before I will ask you once again to marry me," Joshua continued. "And if by then you still do not believe my affections for you are true, I will accept your rejection as gracefully as I can."
You still could not believe it. The image- the thought of yourself marrying Viscount Joshua Hong simply would not manifest completely in your mind. Even when you closed your eyes for a brief moment and tried to picture Viscount Hong at the altar, you still saw him with women more suited to his station- the Duchess of Graham, Miss Jeon, Miss Williams…
"Do you really love me?" you asked him weakly. You hated how exposed and vulnerable you felt in this moment, looking up at this man that was better than you in every conceivable way. "Me? Out of all the more eligible young ladies in the ton… you are quite sure you wish to marry me?"
Joshua stepped forward and seized your hand before bringing it up to his lips. His fingers pressed softly but firmly against your knuckles. 
"I am sorry," he told you kindly, his dark eyes shining in the dimly lit study. "If I  have made you feel unworthy."
You swallowed. "It is not… it is not that you have made me feel unworthy, only-"
"Yes. I wish to marry you, and only you, Miss Lee. By the end of this month, I shall ensure that you will never again question my love or commitment towards you."
He turned and left your study. 
And so began, on a warm June night, your courtship with Viscount Joshua Hong- the most elite and sought-after bachelor in London.
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A/N: As always, thanks for reading and feel free to share your thoughts or inputs!
Since Wonwoo and Joshua were neck-and-neck on the poll as of the time of me posting this, I've decided to go ahead with Joshua since his is shorter/simpler and we'll be doing Wonwoo next.
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yurababy · 1 year
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you’re a whole constellation— l.jh
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synopsis woozi’s new studio looks a bit too perfect for his liking. he has no idea what to write for his next song, but he has a thought on how to make his new space a bit more homely.
notes idol!lee jihoon (woozi) x afab!reader, ONLY 2.9K WHAT. NO WAY. i’m sorry. some angst, fluff, and smut, implied squirting or whatever u wanna call it, fingering, yeah. the vibe here is: “i call u babe, baby’s called my happiness.”
➤ happy bday. ⭐️🍰 wrote this on a whim. title from “nasty” by ariana grande bc jihoon has recommended it before. refer to pics of the universe factory if u don’t know what it looks like. he publically showed his new studio november 2021 for reference. not proofread i’ll do it later! universe factory is unbelievably gorgeous so i needed to do this. i’m sorry this took forever. it took me 4 months. mb bro.
part of the don’t listen in secret series.
taglist ♡ @zen003xx @seung-sungs @angelwonie @rubyreduji @vvsmydiamonds127 @shualicious @whyokoa @dreamhannies @313hwa @minnie-mouser22 @knucklesdeepmingi @lenireads @oolanderr @bestboysvt @misssugarlips @whereisgyu @kodzukein @i4kt @wonushuasworld  @aurumness @bibinnieposts @venusprada @ikissvernon  @listxn @starlight-nightz @svtrbi​ @bakugosbottombitch @kooklovesu @alluringlino @hiddlesdweeb
༺♡༻
“holy shit, ji,” you said as a heel clicked against the hard floor upon entering the room. a chuckle was more exhaled than laughed beside you, and if you weren’t busy admiring the setting, you’d see a suddenly shy woozi scratching his neck.
“i like it so much,” he admitted, trailing behind your wandering figure. “i’m so excited to work in here.”
“universe factory” couldn’t have been executed more perfectly than this. the purple-pink LED lights through the area with a small corner designated to a warm yellow glow, the surprising prism with drawings plastered on each side, and the ceiling.
you felt like a little kid peering through a telescope, wide eyed at the invisible celestials. the nebula and twinkling stars scattered on top were more reminiscent to an old trend of galaxy-print than a NASA sighting. but, as you turned to jihoon for the first time since entering his new studio, you found the stars in his prideful eyes. in that moment, he was sparkling.
you grinned harder as your vision was suddenly becoming blurry. “wow,” you turned your attention to something down, something to conceal the drama of your happiness. “i’m really proud of you.”
he was fixing the positions of some figurines on shelves ever-so-slightly, if you thought about it more it seemed like he was distracting himself the same way you were. he was never one to get emotional. “thank you. i am too… i just need to fill it with music now.”
your interest piqued at that. it was always so exciting to see how in the zone woozi was while creating music, but also, how his mind worked. his abilities never failed to astonish you— it was so hot how he just hummed a random melody and it would then be the chorus of a number one title track. he was nothing less than a genius.
“y/n?”
since when was he standing in front of you?
you blinked once, then twice. “yeah?”
you watched his eyes squint and the corners of his lips tug upwards, but you didn’t comment. did he have a thermostat? he should get one. the room is hot, the air feels thick. maybe you can buy him one of those hand-held fans. maybe you can fan him while he composes.
“i asked if you wanted to help. like, now, just casually.”
definitely casually, you thought, but the furrow of your eyebrows was made evident to jihoon. “i mean,” he continued, an eyebrow of his own raised, “maybe you’ll have some kind of fresh idea. new studio, new sound?”
“oh.” did he want you to sing? to play an instrument? this was woozi, what could you do that he couldn’t? “i’m not sure how i could possibly help you make a song, but sure,” you smiled. you’ll figure it out, probably, and why wouldn’t you want to spend some time with jihoon?
“trust me, you can help me in more ways than you can imagine. we’ll make a song like the kpop industry has never seen before.”
that had you holding back a scoff— what hadn’t the kpop industry seen? woozi likes it when people are honest around him. you decided to share your confusion out loud.
it only earned a wider grin from the boy who was making his way towards his long sofa. you followed in suit, taking note of the mirror right in front, taking up the full length of the wall, and his piano to the right of the mirror. the brief wonder of why such a large mirror was in his studio was held back from being verbally expressed when your earlier question received comment from the boy who had sat on the soft ivory.
for someone of jihoon’s stature, his hands were truly suprisingly large. his veins exposed themselves as nimble fingers spun a pencil in one hand, the other setting aside a notepad. he still held his smile, exhaling a bit dramatically as he patted the space on the cushions beside him, inviting you. “fans seem to think otherwise. i’m sure we could figure something out.”
that’s how you and jihoon found the first half of the evening’s end, the loud laughter and attempts at piano during dusk melting into squints to find starlight in the midst of pollution. the failed musical endevour had been given up for catch-up time accompanied by a previously hidden wine bottle.
“i wish we could see real stars more often,” you sighed, emphasizing the adjective as to not discredit the admiration for the universe factory. your eyes flickered from the faint glows above seoul to the lilac luminescence in your surroundings. a chuckle had you tilting your head at the boy beside you.
he shaked his hand as if to say “no, nothing,” but still provided context. “that reminded me a lot of a song i worked on earlier this year. you know i wish, right?”
your lips involuntary curved upwards as you nodded and sat up facing him. it was better this way, hearing jihoon talk about something he was so enamored with. you wondered if all his writing credits allowed for casual eloquency practice.
something was suddenly quiet, like jihoon was lost in his thoughts. you decided upon asking a question.
“how do you come up with sad lyrics?”
woozi seemed somewhat taken aback by that, evident in the widening of his eyes, but he regained his composure as soon as he lost it. in fact, he eaned back and stretched his triceps. “usually just imagining what it would be like, i watch anime too.”
you furrowed your eyebrows. “not experience?”
he now looked in the space between his lap, clicking his tongue. “not usually, to be honest. i don’t have time to get experience,” he laced the words with a laugh, a silent understanding between the two of you that he was talking about love. “it gets a little tiring sometimes.”
you couldn’t help the words that came out of your mouth next, a bit too fast as if instinct: “romantic or not, you’re surrounded by love, ji, that counts.”
times like these had you regretting your awful memory, when jihoon would break his front and look fragile. the look that followed your response was not quite hurt but held the same pain and shock, like it was miles away from what he expected. you turned away, once again regretfully—  it was a face that you were not supposed to see. and woozi recognized that a beat too late, because a frown already painted your face at the sight of his blush-streaked pale.
you knew he did not want to talk about that outburst from his initiation of affection. he extended an arm, an invitation which you accepted by meeting the boy who sat up almost diagonally on the corner of the couch. your body fit in between his spread legs as the back of your head hit his shoulder, woozi’s arm swinging around your own.
one, two, and some more kisses were planted somewhere among your hair and forehead. the distance between the two of you was small, but you still questioned your hearing when hot breath accompanied his lips, a plush sensation against your skin as if he was saying something but you couldn’t make out anything more than mumbles. you did make out one thing though, a little, “at least i have my friend baby.”
at the therapeutic atmosphere, your eyes has subconsciously fluttered shut, and you hadn’t realized until you remembered the joy of being in the moment with jihoon, seeing him. you must have looked starstruck when your gaze met his considering how his gibbous eyes waned into crescents, his mouth replicating the semi-circle shape as well with his smile. for some reason it made you smile too, maybe too hard for the moment.
“i love music,” he suddenly confessed, grin evident in his voice. your eyes coincidentally fell towards the wine bottle from earlier.
your face knit in confusion and you exhaled a laugh, but he kept smiling. “what’s got you so happy now?”
jihoon wet his lips and looked down at you, eyes back to their standard size. “i’ve always had this idea that i don’t think anyone else has really done.” a pause. you waited before questioning because it was so easy to tell when he was thinking. you felt the returned contact of his lips on your face in that duration. “in kpop. something you can help me with.” he then added.
you occupied yourself with his hand, ever-so reminiscent of jade and silk. “i’m listening.”
you felt the vibration of a hum in the place of a verbal answer, then jihoon’s other hand tilting up your chin. (somewhere along the way of the words you blame his wine on, your gaze fell down on his sculpted hands.)
then, a kiss, to which you eagerly responded. jihoon did not talk much about his past, his relationships, his feelings to begin with, but had you not know his schedule, he might as well have been hitting the club daily. he used his mouth like a paintbrush covering canvas, not quite hungry and overly passionate but not gentle either. the two of you were not doing this often, but you swallowed down a question that you knew was too much.  has there ever been anyone?
the action had the boy make a noise that was only comparable to a purr.
he slowy unweaved the two of you, taking his time to break the touch. you didn’t whine, you knew it was not a true goodbye. he wasn’t one for short or half-assed affection.
“i won’t do it if you say no, i swear, but if you feel like doing something, could i record the audio?” his explanation of his idea had him getting a bit timid, scarlet airbrushed against his cheeks as you watched him. 
“like a video of us fucking?” 
he cringed a bit at that, you coud see it in the scrunch of his nose.“no, no, definitely not, i wouldn’t- no. i just meant the audio? phone face-down.”
“what will you do with it?”
“delete it if you want, but i wanted to try playing an excerpt really quiet in the back of a song. thinking of releasing a solo soon.”
your head moved further up against his shoulder as you nodded. “okay.”
“what?”
you giggled and sat up, allowing him room to get up. “why so surprised? i trust you, musical genius.”
jihoon squinted a bit and shook his head but didn’t verbalize any thoughts as he quietly made his way towards his sound equipment. from there, he pressed a few buttons and did some other stuff that made no sense to you, but watching his veins flex on his nimble hands as he swiftly worked was a nice view. it didn’t take long before he exhaled, almost shyly, “one, two,” and assured the audio was working.
“it’s recording. our voices.” he spoke a bit stiffly, but you knew how he was feeling. it only took the painfully slow cracking of each of his knuckles, a deep breath, and a slightly hesitant would music interfere with the recording? probably, right? before he planted himself onto the chair closest to his recording desk. suddenly, he seemed perfectly comfortable, the evidence in his lax recline and manspread.
“come here,” his eyes dwelled on the ground for a second too long, waiting for your steps across the floor before he would look up. once you made your way over to him, a silent understanding of your designated place to be on his lap, he run his palms up and down your sides. there was a tilt to his head, eyes not leaving yours now. the recording picked up heavy breaths and the smooth of skin against skin with no real contact yet.
then, another breath, trying to come out as a laugh, but the only assurance of this is the disappearance of jihoon’s eyes and the apples of his cheeks. “well,” he started, big hands caging your waist as he circled the dimples of your back beneath your shirt. “let’s make music, then.”
in search of friction, you begin rocking yourself on his lap and take note to catch him in the gym one day. it’s too easy, the way you already begin gasping at the notice of jihoon bucking his hips up. when you bury your face in the crook of his shoulder, his lips latch onto as far as they can reach, near your neck.
“i always liked the color red. lucky me, babygirl wears it so often,” he spoke while pushing your head to face his, taking in the sight of your scarlet blush and lips tinted vermilion.
“jihoon,” you managed to form, though slightly incoherent. “get on with it.”
this earned a smile out of the latter, stroking your hair in what almost seemed like an assert of dominance. “can you go against the soundboard? give me a second.” you got into the requested position, turning your head to watch him fish through a drawer. when he revealed a sweet flavored lube bottle, he ever so nimbley poured a generous amount on his fingers (the way he moved the bottle to cover the entirety of his long digits made you salviate a bit) and approached you at what seemed like a centimeter per second.
one hand met your waist, rubbing circles while the other pulled down your skirt. he allowed it to hit the ground before he let himself see what you had other, a hidden ruby jewel just for him.
“baby’s so kind, coloring me red everytime i see her. thank you for the gift.”
he talked and moved much too slow, the wetness of your cunt darkening the color of your underwear. jihoon rubbed against the cloth with a coo and two fingers before he pushed it to the side.
with the pad of his index against your clit, you took the opportunity to rock against it. woozi didn’t punish, he simpy moved his hand to grip your hip still and gave a light slap to your pussy, eliciting a breathy moan from you. 
(he would have a hard time fitting this into a song, he thinks. he doesn’t think he could produce without being unbearably hard. he figures he could just enjoy the sex and stop thinking about work.)
“jihoon, please, please go ahead, sorry,” you begged. he kissed your shoulder and rubbed your clit with two fingers before thrusting his middle into you. no worries.
and you really loved that about jihoon, that he didn’t understand punishment during pleasure. it wasn’t that you disliked punishment, no, but sometimes you just needed to get on with it. you and him both.
“two,” you almost immedietly spoke, and he followed with his index. they curled knuckle-deep and hit into you in such a calculated rhythm, speeding up into a chorus, making you wonder if he was already composing. 
then, an anti-drop. he slowed and you made incoherable sounds. “y/n, do you want to cum now, or later?”
“both,” you whined, and the beat came back.
“is that so,” he lightly chuckled, speeding up to a pace you didn’t know could still be enjoyable. as he pushed his fingers in further, you gasped, the penetration serving as yet another reminder of how long they are. balancing yourself on the soundboard, you reached for the hand that was steady on your hip and brought it up, up, until his fingers touched your tongue. you smiled against the skin when you heard jihoon grunt.
he pushed the digits further into your mouth, allowing you to circle your spit around his skin. “you have 5 seconds. maybe you forgot, but i can’t have your noises muffled.” muffed, they were, as far as you could tell with the protesting scream that came out as a mere grumble. punishment or not, he was a bit sadistic, something he would dwell on if he had more chances with intimacy like this.
when the time was up, you did not have much time to miss the sensation in your mouth. woozi pulled out his fingers, flipped you around, supported the two of you against the soundboard, replaced his fingers, and kissed you. he knew what he was doing, working at his fast pace with his hand and keeping your mouth busy at the same time. he released your lips everytime he touched them, allowing you to still moan openly while getting what you both wanted. 
“right there,” you breathed out, though it took you a couple of tries to get out the phrase. your g-spot, he figured, angling his fingers to the area.
when he looked at where you were being recorded, he saw the frequency wave showcasing your high-pitched noises, understanding you were close before you whimpered it out. a last minute decision, jihoon’s pinky slid into you accompanied by the other two digits, his fingers rubbing and pumping and the words, “thank you, baby” against your mouth sending you over the edge. he smirked at the frequency wave when you screamed, kissing a tear that slipped from your eye as you came. only, he realized you were still cumming.
“baby,” he looked at your tightly-shut eyes and parted lips, free hand coming up to your neck to cushion your body. “are you okay?”
“huh?” you opened your eyes, becoming aware of just how wet you were. you looked down, only to see his fingers escape from your folds and relocate to his mouth. he seemed to think for a moment, tongue settled against your release, before capturing the hem of your panties between his fingers.
“sorry i ruined these, babygirl. song’s not quite finished yet, though.”
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blueberrykenn · 5 months
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Kennie's Top 10 Yearly Fic Recommendations
Okay so this is the 2nd year of me doing this (but this year I wont delete) butttt I show my top 10 fic and authors for each member/group( some members of bts repeat due to the amount of poly fics I read and its what I mainly read) (A handful of these have smut so heres your warning)
(I would also love to be your guys friends as every single one of you seems absolutely amazing)
LETS GET STARTED
10. @guqwrvte Make it Three (Jungkook, Jimin and Taehyung)
Oh where do I start with this fic I found it in the spring looking for a Soulmate fic and oh boy I was in for a ride THREE SOULMATES?! ummm YES and the arcade chapter was ABSOULELY AMAZING! I hope you're doing well Author!! as this fic hasn't been updated in a while
9. @yonkimint Without You (Yoongi with a side of Hoseok or "Jay")
OHHHH BOY When I wanted a love triangle I WAS NOT DISAPPOINTED I found this fic in April looking for angst and ANGST I GOT without spoiling it its a Pregnancy/ Single Mom AU and one of the best ones Ive read in a longgggg time
8. @guksthighs Bloom (Yoongi)
OH BOY This is a recent one actually. This one shot was made SIX YEARS AGO?! OMG Hanahaki AUs are one of my favorites angst type of fics so when I read this I literally sobbed like a baby I cant say much else without spoiling it
7. @kimnjss cyberslut (Yoongi), less of you/VINTAGE (Jimin), Strawberry Kisses(Jungkook)
MISS HAS ALWAYS BEEN ONE OF MY FAVES SINCE 2019 like when I first read beside you YESS I reread Cyberslut and HAD to include it but reading less of you in June as I was dealing with my own breakup it was a tear jerker towards the end of less of you, for me I wont spoil it but there a plot twist that I was not expecting towards the end of the sequel, Vintage. BUT STRAWBERRY KISSES OH MY GAHD I read that on my way home in August even though its a SMUTTY I enjoyed it a lot and the FLUFF I think some people looked at me crazy when I took the bus home that day
6. @skazoo if you tell me about yourself( Stray Kids' Felix)
Okay here me out! Demon Slayer. Its one of my favorite manga and anime series and with CHANBIN as a hashira UMMM YES ynand chanbin are literally Genya and Sanemi if Genya was a girl and not YK (demon slayer spoiler!!) eating demons, but this 2 parter was ABSOULTELY AMAZING
5. @ugh-yoongi a word from our sponsors (Namjoon)
How do you get a idoit podcasters to not realize they have feelings but read smut YOU GET THESE TWO MFERS This one shot was sooooooo good!! like I read a lot of smut but this? TOP TEIR OF ONESHOTS OF 2023
4. @sopebubbles Bulletproof Heart (2Seok)
THIS ROLLERCOASTER If I had to describe my childhood in fanfictions this one would be one (check #1 for the other) I wont say why because spoilers but this angst was OMG THE YOONGI HATE WAS UNREAL NOT MY YOONGLES but I loved it soooooooo much
3.@jihoonotes Yearning(SVT's Woozi)
Lee Jihoon is literally my ult bias. Do I need to say more? ITS WORTH THE READ
2. @solemnreads Way Back Home(Jungkook)
THIS FIC HAD ME FUCKING EVERYWHERE with the twins to CEO Kook THE JEALOUSLY I LOVE IT by far the best exes to lovers fic I read this year
before I tell yall #1 I wanna give an honorable mention to @purpleyoonn they would be on the main list if I was done reading you complete us BUTTTT RED STRING is amazing even though there only 2 parts so far
Okay Okay this should be expected if you been here for a bit
1.@theharrowing Literally anything they write but mainly Rose Tinted Obsessions and Collateral
Boy Blue and Collateral Taehyungs literally Remained me of In between Taehyung so much that I got inspired to write in between again everything I read from them is Absolutely Amazing, Top Tier just Yes DARK FICS are literally my go to so reading them had me sooooo happy and wanting more
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fantasy-svt · 11 months
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Stop laughing
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Previous | Magic or Not Masterlist | Next
Synopsis: Jihoon never thought he'd fall in love, he found the concept appalling. Yet here he was, falling for someone and he hates every second of it.
Pairing: Lee Jihoon x fem!reader Word Count: 2.3k words
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The lake was larger than Jihoon had expected, the water a light blueish green and the plants surrounding it seemed to glow. It was a recommended spot for finding cultivated plants, the lake itself magic and thus an excellent spot for the alchemist to search around. Another plus was the quietness, something Jihoon loved and yet he could never really enjoy it. He loved his friends, they were like his family when his actual one didn't want him, but they were loud. Too loud... Then again, that is kind of excited of 11 full grown men and the fairy, Chan.
"Alright, now where do I fi-Ah!" Jihoon let out a loud yelp as he turned around, face to face with a large creature. It's head was larger than his whole body and the (e/c) colored eyes were staring him down like he was vermin. The creature looked familiar, the seaweed-like hair and the greenish color of its body indicated that it lived in the lake itself. Falling down on his butt, Jihoon could only stare at the creature in disbelief The kelpie huffed at him, water hitting Jihoon in the face and wetting his clothes and books. Now, Jihoon didn't mind water at all. But his books? Those were precious to him, mostly full of his own work and notes that took him years to write and create. So with an angry huff of his own, he got up and pointed an accusing finger at the creature.
"You!" He stopped, not knowing what on earth he should say. He wasn't even sure if the creature would understand him, but he tried anyway. "Do you know how long it took to make these? You, you insolent-" Another huff of the kelpie and Jihoon screamed in annoyance, dropping back to the ground on his knees. He assumed that he was semi-lucky that his own notebook was fine, but the book he had been holding was also full on notes of how to use certain flowers and why. Things that he needed years for to figure out and certainly didn't know of the top of his head what he had written down in those years. Glancing up again, Jihoon was only met with an empty lake again and no sign of the creature from before. Not knowing out of his head which plants he needed and with the list gone, Jihoon decided that returning to the palace was the best idea. Even with the warm weather, Jihoon didn't feel like catching a cold. So he returned to the palace with all of his books, grumbling on and on about how he would have the kelpie's head on a stick next time.
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The next time Jihoon returned, it was with magic protection spells on all of his books and an extra set of clothing just to be sure. However, the kelpie was no where in sight. Instead, only a bunch of flowers laid on the spot where Jihoon stood last time. Looking at the flowers for awhile, Jihoon was quick to realize that those were the flowers that he needed the last time. They seemed fresh, but how they were was a mystery. It had been a week and a half since Jihoon came here, but maybe cultivated flowers didn't wilt. Jihoon would have to experiment a bit to find out, he had never used them before.
"Are they the right ones?" For the second time here, Jihoon screamed loudly as he jumped back from where the voice came and due to this he stumbled before falling back into the water. His lungs were empty, no air there for when he fell and he quickly swam back up to catch some air. When he resurfaced, he was met with some curious eyes.
"Sorry..." You apologized as you held out your hand, pulling the mystery man from the water with a sheepish grin. Jihoon grumbled again, realizing that he was now soaked and he did not bring a fresh pair of underwear. So for the second time, he'd have to return home in wet clothes. Speaking of clothes, Jihoon soon enough noticed that you were none. Your body was covered with your hair, long locks that turned green near the end of the strands and thick enough to not be see-through. So Jihoon grabbed his bag and handed you a shirt of his, all while trying to fight of the red flush that started to rise up to his face. You looked confused by his gesture, but took the shirt nonetheless and pulled it on. It was small on you, Jihoon noted, the shirt barely covering your torso. Luckily, you were covered with some sort of skirt from the waist down, one made from what looked like seaweed-
"You're the kelpie!" Jihoon finally figured it out why your eyes looked familiar, the stare now looked kinder and more curious than it had before. You smiled, sharp teeth appearing that almost made Jihoon jump once more. You didn't seem to notice as you leaned closer to the human man and it was then that Jihoon noticed your height. You were taller than him, probably even as tall as Mingyu or even taller. Jihoon didn't know for sure, but he could check if you ever stood up. Almost like reading his thoughts, you stood up to your full height and held out your hand for him. He took it before gulping when he realized that you were a full head taller than him.
"So are they the right ones? I don't know the names that you wrote down since we call them by different names, but I guessed you needed these." You rambled on and Jihoon was instantly reminded of his friends, something that he wasn't sure if it should please or annoy him. A quick glance at the flowers again confirmed that they were right like he first guess, so he gave you a short nod. You gleamed, clapping your hands in slight excitement before picking them up and holding them out to the man before you.
"Thank you..?" It sounded more like a question, but you didn't seem to notice it and instead just smiled brightly once more. With that, you dove back into the water and Jihoon was left in shock of everything that had just happened with flowers still in hand.
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Nori was leading the way at this point, Jihoon trying to stop the serpent in doing so but failing miserably. When he told everyone of the mysterious kelpie that he had met, Nori had shown the most interest and basically forced Jihoon to let her join him for the next time. It wasn't like he planned on it, but the flowers he had gotten were already gone due to experiments. Telling the sea serpent to slow down was pointless, it was better to just set her go and make sure that she wouldn't trip over her own feet. When the lake was reached, you were nowhere in sight and Nori let out a disappointed whine.
"Stop whining, you're an adult." Jihoon spoke as he started to search for the flowers he needed, ignoring the whines that kept coming from Nori. The whines stopped soon enough when you reached the surface, looking at both Jihoon and Nori before lowering yourself slightly back into the water until only the top half of your face was only visible. Nori was kind enough to not greet you too loudly, instead she just showed off her own scales and this was enough for you to resurface. Jihoon noticed that you still wore his shirt, although the fabric was soaked and slightly see-through, and he couldn't help but chuckle. Your hair looked different today, not the sea-weed strands like before and rather just normal (h/c) hair. Although you looked normal at first, Jihoon could also spot the tail that floated to the surface and he couldn't help but wonder if that meant that you were still half kelpie underneath the water or not. This was quickly answered said question when you came up from the water with Nori's help, sitting in between the grass while you happily talked to the sea serpent. It didn't take long for him to collect everything, but he dared not to interrupt your conversation.
"Oh, wait! I have something for you." You dove back under the water before resurfacing with something that looked like paper. Notes were scribbled down, a messy form of his language that confused Jihoon slightly.
"I tried my best to copy what you wrote, but I do not know the language besides speaking. I hope you can read it." You said shyly and Jihoon picked up the notes, confused at whatever it was written on before reading it shortly. It looked decent, it was exactly what he wrote and the letters were able to be read. So he thanked you with a nod and you smiled.
"How about joining us to the castle?" Nori asked and you looked at her before looking at the area around you. You'd have to leave all the flowers, they'd wilt or be stolen. Then again, you could relocate closer to the palace. After all, you wanted to join the pair and you wanted to live closer to Nori... and maybe a bit closer to Jihoon as well. You glanced at the man, flinching when you noticed that his eyes were already on yours. Nonetheless, you just nodded in agreement before diving down to gather your stuff. Once done, you followed the two back to the palace.
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"Are they growing yet?" Jihoon asked as he reached the pond and you looked up, smiling as you spotted Jihoon before shaking your head.
"They take awhile to grow in a new place, but the palace is placed on magic grounds. It won't take long, don't worry. You look stressed, what's wrong?" You asked and Jihoon shrugged, sitting down. Somehow, throughout the weeks that you had build your home here by the palace, Jihoon had grown closer to you and tended to visit you every single day. Normally, he looked fine but now he looked tired and stressed.
"Work, nothing more. Cheol-hyung needs something and I can't figure out how to make it." Jihoon spoke and you nodded, sitting beside him before giving him a smirk.
"Wanna do something fun then?" You asked, which confused Jihoon. He didn't disagree, instead he just nodded and let you drag him off to the river. Once reached, you dove in and when you resurfaced you were not human looking anymore. Instead, you were in kelpie form. A giant horse that seemed to be made from sea-weed, long strands floating in the water beside you. You neighed, but in Jihoon's head it sounded like you were just asking him to jump in.
Although he had doubts, he followed your order and jumped into the water. It was cold, freezing even with the thick clothes he wore. His hand came in contact with you and he quickly grabbed on, surprised with how warm your body felt compared to the water. Then you started, diving under again and racing in the water before jumping up. The air felt even colder, but even then Jihoon felt excited. It was like he flew, but when he finally felt free in the air you suddenly dived back into the water before going back up. After only 5 jumps, both of you were somewhat exhausted and you were quick to guide the man back to the surface.
"That was awesome!" Jihoon exclaimed and you joined him again, this time human once more. You laid in the grass beside him, chuckling softly before turning your head to watch Jihoon. He looked handsome, hair dripping and his shirt was now see-through like yours. The staring didn't stop, not even when Jihoon looked back at you.
"Thank you, I feel better now." He spoke and you smiled at him before rolling over and leaning above him. He seemed shocked by what you did, but instead of removing yourself from on top of him you just leaned your forehead against his.
Now what Jihoon didn't know, is that it is a way to confess ones love to another for kelpies and thus he didn't return the gesture.
For a few seconds, you were sad until you realized that he was in fact human and not a kelpie. So with an awkward chuckle, you quickly start to explain.
"I like you... That's why I did that, it's a kelpie thing." You speak, your voice a bit softer than it usually was, and Jihoon nodded in understanding. It took a couple of seconds before he realized that you just confessed to him, but when he did he was quick to sit up. With a finger pointed in his own direction, he asked if you meant him for certain to which you nodded with a smile. So Jihoon came closer again and followed your previous action, leaning his forehead against yours while trying to fight back the blush. You giggled, pushing back against his head slightly before pulling back.
"Want to help me plant the rest of the plants?" You asked as you got up, pulling him up with you before guiding him along back to the castle. Now, Jihoon didn't like the outdoors much and plowing through mud didn't seem his thing either. Yet, his answer was clearly against his previous thoughts.
"I can do that, yes." He spoke, surprised by his own words as they rolled off of his tongue. But the smile on your face made it okay, it made his heart skip a beat and his face light up in a red hue.
In the end, not much work got done. Instead, all you did was laugh as Jihoon tried to plant everything and failing miserably. The man didn't have a green thumb, but you did so it was okay. That didn't stop Jihoon's grumbling for you to stop laughing.
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hannie-dul-set · 5 months
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— arranged by: member (eldest to youngest) | date (latest to oldest) | type (full-length to drabbles to blurbs) i don’t recommend reading my older works because they’re terrible. still putting them on here for the sake of bookkeeping | last updated: 23.12.18 
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HUMILITY. lucky 7 collab with @haokyeom; humility /(h)yo͞oˈmilədē/ — a modest or low view of one’s own importance; humbleness.
PAIRING. choi seungcheol x reader. GENRE. royal! au, romance, fluff, prince! seungcheol. WARNINGS. none. WORD COUNT. 4.8k.
EVEN IN DEATH. even in death, you’ll never win.
PAIRING. choi seungcheol x reader. GENRE. dystopian! au, angst. WARNINGS. suicide, major character death, swearing. WORD COUNT. 569.
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LUST. lucky 7 collab with @haokyeom; lust /ləst/ — the mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the spirit is life and peace - romans 8:6.
PAIRING. yoon jeonghan x reader. GENRE. college! au, extremely suggestive, angst. WARNINGS. borderline smut, implied smut, nsfw themes obviously lmao but no actual doing the dirty because i can’t write smut for shit, swearing, jeonghan is the literal devil. WORD COUNT. 4.5k.
[pink bedroom! aesthetic]
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RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU. it’s easy to miss things when you’re preoccupied. but sometimes the obvious answer is just simply right in front of you.
PAIRING. joshua hong x reader. GENRE. coffee shop! au, fluff, humor, underlying pining. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 996.
BLANC & NOIR. there’s no plot, just joshua being a devil, really.
PAIRING. joshua hong x reader. GENRE. suggestive, power dynamics. WARNINGS. nswf-ish lol, finger in mouth yes u heard me. WORD COUNT. 634.
[boyfriend! au]
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PRIDE. lucky 7 collab with @haokyeom; pride /prīd/ — it was pride that changed angels into devils; it is humility that makes men as angels - st. augustine.
PAIRING. kwon soonyoung x reader. GENRE. dystopian! au, angst, suggestive, romance-ish. WARNINGS. major character death, mentions of death, unhealthy relationships, one slightly nsfw scene. WORD COUNT. 3.7k.
[art hoe! aesthetic]
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DILIGENCE. lucky 7 collab with @haokyeom; diligence /ˈdiləjəns/ — thoroughness, completeness, and persistence of an action, particularly in matters of faith.
PAIRING. lee jihoon x reader. GENRE. canon compliant, established relationship! au, comfort fluff. WARNINGS. none. WORD COUNT. 679.
[cottagecore! aesthetic]
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BETWEEN THE AISLES. wherein you discover your feelings for your best friend in between the grocery aisles.
PAIRING. kim mingyu x reader. GENRE. best friends! au, fluff, humor. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 2k.
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HONEYDEW. seokmin smoochies.
PAIRING. lee seokmin x reader. GENRE. tooth rotting fluff. WARNINGS. none. WORD COUNT. 410.
BE CAREFUL. sunset at the beach with seokmin.
PAIRING. lee seokmin x reader. GENRE. summer! au, fluff. WARNINGS. none. WORD COUNT. 461.
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THINGS YOU CAN’T HIDE. seungkwan decides that you’re his best bet to get his annoying friends to finally fuck off.
PAIRING. boo seungkwan x reader. GENRE. college! au, volleyball! au, fake dating! au, fluff. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 2.1k.
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[vernon punk! au] [vernon red movie theatre! aesthetic]
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SEVENTEEN MASTERLIST. © hannie-dul-set.
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