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malamira · 2 months

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QUIET LOVE, OH HOW IT SCREAMS

synopsis: "i'd never let anything happen to you, if i could help it."

a/n: GOD, i love doctor!au inukag. i did a lot of editing and revising for this, so it's a different beast from what it was when smutmas version came out. i'm not 100% happy with the ending, but i mean. if i did any more i had a feeling i would just ruin it instead of help it.

— 💓 —

“You’re going to love me,” Sango sing-songed, sliding into the seat next to Kagome’s.

Kagome grunted, massaging her temple. The bar wasn't too crowded, thankfully, but the noise level was high enough that she had to speak up to be heard. “Why? Did you kill the hospital director yet?”

“No,” Sango said primly; Onigumo Industries owned the hospital Kagome was a surgeon at, and Sango's father was vice president of one of the subsidiaries. “But,” she said, grasping her friend’s arm, “I kind of have a solution to your extended shift problem.”

“You mean the hospital is hiring another surgeon?” Kagome mumbled grumpily, knocking back her watered down whisky. The moisture that collected outside the glass splattered unto the bar when she slammed it down.

“No! A guy!”

Kagome stared at her best friend, first blankly, then sourly. “Sango, I love you and I know you only have my best interests at heart, but seriously? I barely have time to bathe Buyo. I don’t have time for a guy.”

“No, I mean like to fuck!” her friend said encouragingly. “It’s been rough the past few weeks. Maybe a good orgasm will fix you right up!"

Kagome's cheeks colored. "I don't—"

Sango wasn't having any of it. "Aw, come on! It's just some harmless fun. He’s right over there, by the booth—”

“Now?” Kagome said incredulously. “I’m in my scrubs. I have a stain on my shirt!”

“So? Is it a shit stain?”

“I’m not even going to correct you on how many hospital protocols I would’ve broken if it were a shit stain.”

“Lighten up, Kagome!” Sango insisted, jumping up from her chair and tugging at her friend's arm. “It’s Friday and you deserve to get laid. Come on.”

“It is a testament to our ten-year friendship that I am choosing to trust you,” Kagome said flatly, throwing a few bills on the counter to cover her drink. She called over the bartender before letting Sango pull her away.

“Hello, gentlemen,” Sango said brightly, then brandished her friend from behind her. “As promised, my lady doctor friend.”

“Hi,” the guy at the edge of the booth said, dark hair and bright, blue eyes. He was cute, Kagome could admit, if a little too... pedestrian, for her tastes. He extended a hand to shake. “I’m Kōga.”

“Kagome,” she introduced herself, taking his hand for a brief shake. He scooted over and motioned for her to sit next to him.

Sango had already settled into the side of a guy who had a short ponytail and earrings. “I’m Miroku,” that guy said.

She only just managed to land her butt on the leather seat of the booth, she felt a familiar vibration pattern in her pocket. Her emergency pattern.

Before Kōga—or Sango, for that matter—could utter a word, she’d straightened and fished out her phone. “Hospital. Gotta go.”

Without so much as a look back, she bolted.

—

“I’m here,” Kagome panted, running into the ER. "I'm here!"

“Doc!” Jinenji, one of the nurses on shift, called out, timidly holding a clipboard to his chest as he approached from the nurses' station. “I know you just got out—”

“It’s fine.” She waved away his concern. “What do you need?”

“We did a test for Nazuna, the one who had the appendectomy earlier today, and the results required a change in dosage,” he informed her, then turned sheepish when he continued, “I’m really sorry; her mother was getting… irate, and I couldn't get another physician—”

Kagome shook her head and let out a breath. “It’s okay, Jinenji; it's not your fault. Good thing I was nearby.” A bar two blocks away wasn't necessarily nearby, but Jinenji didn’t have to know that. She took the clipboard. "Nazuna... the one with anemia, right? Can we check if she needs a transfusion? Her RBC's looking pretty low..."

“Dr. Higurashi!” another nurse cried as soon as Jinenji took off with her advice. “Thank God you're here; I need you!”

Kagome sighed and got to work.

—

A few hours later, she yawned as she pushed back against the desk in the middle of the doctor's lounge, her chair screeching against the floor. "Oh my God," she groaned, exhausted.

“I hear Higurashi,” a gruff voice called a few hours later, and a light-haired head popped into the admin room doorway. Gold eyes peered at her with interest. “Hey. Isn’t your shift over? Why are you still here?”

Kagome stretched in her chair and rubbed her eye with the back of her hand. She smiled tiredly at Inuyasha, who regarded her with curious eyes. “Had to do something. You haven’t left yet?”

He strode into the room, hands in his pockets. He’d forgone his lab coat and scrubs, changing into jeans and a button-up shirt. “About to, yeah. Where'd you come from? Your house?”

She shook her head. “No, I was at the bar two blocks down. You know Shikon?”

Inuyasha smirked and jerked his head. “Come on. I’ll drive you back. Unless you wanna walk…?”

“Nah, you’re good,” she said, collecting her things and leaving the room. She fell into step next to him. “And excuse you, I had one drink.”

He opened the door to the stairwell and let her pass; the elevator to the parking was under repair. “Shikon’s for kids anyway. Why not head to, I don’t know, Totosai’s, or something?”

“I didn’t pick the place,” Kagome mumbled. Her phone vibrated in her pocket and she fumbled for it, shoes echoing as they made their way down the cement steps.

“Oh? Were you out with friends, then?”

"Yeah." Kagome groaned, pausing in the middle of the stairwell, "And she’s fucking pissed at me.”

Inuyasha raised an eyebrow, curious. He hopped back up a few steps to get back to her level and peered at her phone, eyes widening at the slew of texts she'd apparently ignored.

Sango 23:44 Is everything ok?

Sango 00:22 Kagome we’re still at the bar in case u wanna come back, I’m telling Koga ur coming back

Sango 00:28 Can u reply so i can give an update

Sango 01:18 Kagome PLS!! Trying to call u, pls answer

Sango 01:31 Koga left. He’s kinda pissed and I’m super embarrassed

Sango 01:56 Leaving too, it’s been 2 hours

Sango 02:03 Call me in the morning when I’m more important than your job

He whistled lowly. “She’s really mad, huh?”

“No, really? What gave that away?” Kagome said blankly, furiously typing back. Sorry, stuff at the hospital got hectic. Will make it up to you tomorrow. She sent the message and pocketed her phone, pressing a hand to her forehead. She took a deep breath before turning to climb back up the stairs.

“What’s up?”

“You go on ahead,” she said.

“What?" She could hear Inuyasha climb up after her. "Why?”

“I’m heading home,” she said, looking back at him. She lived on the other side of town, opposite the direction of Shikon.

Inuyasha put his hands in his pockets and looked at her like she was crazy. “Are you crazy? It’s two in the morning, Higurashi. I’ll drive you home."

She gaped. “Are you crazy? I live an hour away!”

“Traffic won’t be too bad,” he said with a shrug, not looking at her. “I don’t mind. Seriously.”

“But—”

He sighed and climbed further up the stairs until they were a step apart, his eyes meeting hers with barely a tilt of his head. “Kagome, seriously. You work too hard and give too much."

She rolled her eyes, "I'm fine—"

"Oh, come on," Inuyasha said, clearly exasperated. "Don’t think I hadn’t heard of you being wheeled out of the operating room after that cystectomy last week.”

She flushed at that. “I—How’d you know about that?”

“Jinenji’s very easy to manipulate.”

She gaped and lightly smacked his arm. “That’s mean! You know he’s scared of you.”

“He’s scared of a lot of things,” Inuyasha shot back. “And I would’ve known anyway.”

“How?”

“Kagome,” he said, one of his hands slipping out of his pocket to gently grasp her wrist. He raised it so it hovered in between their faces. “You’re shaking.”

Her hand twitched before her eyes, and she bit her lip. “I'm fine, I'm just tired—"

"Tired? But you're consistently taking 24-hour shifts?" He lowered her hand, but didn't let go of her wrist. "Come on, Kagome. Admit it; you're overworking yourself."

She sniffed. "I didn’t know you watched me so closely.” It was meant to corner him, but it came out feeble and shy.

He sighed and lowered their clasped hands. “Seriously, Kagome,” he mumbled as he, to her surprise, rubbed his thumb over the back of her hand. “You need to take care of yourself more.”

She looked down at his hand, watching as his thumb dragged tenderly over her skin.

Her relationship with Inuyasha was both surprisingly simple and terrifyingly complicated. They had met in medical school, when she was a sophomore and he was in his last year. They'd gone to different schools—rival schools—but they had a mutual friend who introduced them, thinking they’d be perfect for each other.

It couldn’t have gone more wrong.

She looked too much like his ex, he said, while she claimed that he was too big of an asshole. While they were both planning to eventually become surgeons, it seemed like the similarities stopped there. Whenever they managed to come across each other it was like they wanted to bite each other’s head off for the smallest of things—like breathing too loud, or walking too slow—until they discovered that they’d work together in the same hospital, in the same operating team.

They'd learned to deal with each other. At least until the day Kagome’s brother had been wheeled in into the ER.

Sōta had been shot.

Kagome had nearly lost her mind with worry, snapping at anyone who denied her access to her brother, until Inuyasha had to practically manhandle her to sit down on the couch in the physician’s lounge. He had talked her down, told her that he was handling the operation, he'd be the one to take care of her brother, but she needed to calm the fuck down, okay?

She'd grabbed his hand and made him promise to do everything—everything—he could.

He'd kissed her forehead, unbidden, and left the room. The shock of it was like the icing on the proverbial cake, rendering her speechless. It was too much all at once, and she ended up sleeping on the lounge couch. A few hours later, Inuyasha woke Kagome up and she bolted to see her brother.

Sōta had made it, albeit looking a little worse for wear. Her mother had screamed at the police on the phone, the angriest Kagome had ever seen her. Turned out Sōta had been shot by an unknown assailant after being mugged, and the man was still on the loose.

The police had found him eventually, Kagome had told Inuyasha when he asked, and she hadn't known anything beyond that. The other surgeon nodded, looking pensive. Kagome had realized she hadn’t thanked him yet, for all he’d done. She had suggested that she pick up his shifts in return.

He'd declined (surprisingly politely). Instead, he'd offered to pick up her shifts while she took a break. When she'd asked what for, all he said was, "To take care of your brother," and left it at that.

She'd thought he'd take one or two shifts, but he'd crossed her name out of the shift sheet for a total of three weeks, declaring that hanyōs didn't really need sleep, and therefore could take on more work. ("I'm the ideal ER doctor, if you think about it," he'd said.)

"Inuyasha," she said.

His thumb resumed its motions. "Hm?"

"Why are you being so nice to me?" she asked him.

That seemed to snap him out of whatever stupor he'd landed himself in, and he let go. She kind of missed it.

With a blush on his face, he scoffed and looked away. "I—You know, I pick up your shifts when you're out, you know? I—You shouldn't take—If you get sick, I'll have to take more shifts."

Awkward silence settled over them, and Kagome stepped down to stand closer to him. They were practically nose to nose, and Inuyasha's gold gaze met hers with an intensity that made her want to shiver.

"You're lying," she challenged boldly, and that made him scoff again, sounding completely offended this time around.

"Why would I lie?" he said with a roll of his eyes, turning away and stepping down.

Kagome was growing frustrated. She couldn't put into words what she wanted to tell him.

"You're always—" She shook her head. She was ready to yell, but she wasn't angry. Once upon a time, she would have snapped, called him a coward, and stomped past him. But gone was the pure loathing that defined the early stages of their relationship. So where did that leave them?

Where did that leave her?

He turned and looked back up at her. "Look. I can drive you home, and I—" He ran a frustrated hand through his hair. "Just get some rest, okay? You've had a long day. I can take your shift tomorrow, just... just get some rest."

The next thing she knew, she was watching his back as he climbed down the stairs, and that's when it dawned on her.

Her brother, her job, her wellbeing—why hadn't she realized sooner that—

"Inuyasha."

He paused and sighed, turning back to face her. "Kagome, just—"

Maybe it was the exhaustion, but the way he looked at her made her eyes prick with heat. She bounded towards him and wrapped her arms around his neck, burying her face in his shirt collar. "Thank you."

He was clearly taken aback, but managed to keep both of them upright. "Wh—For what—"

"For taking care of me," she mumbled. "That's what you're doing, right?"

She felt his body go rigid before relaxing. His arms slowly came around her middle. "Stupid girl," he murmured with so much affection it made her heart skip, "Only because you're doing a terrible job at it."

She sobbed. "I'm sorry for worrying you."

"It's okay."

"And I'm sorry for not noticing sooner," she sniffled. "I'm sorry for being a workaholic, and for being exhausted, and for crying."

His arms tightened just a bit. "It's okay."

"I'm sorry for being annoying about it."

His low laughter rumbled in his chest. "It's okay."

She hugged him tighter. "And I'm sorry I never thanked you for Sōta."

He lets out a breath and turn his head. "You don't have to apologize or thank me for that, Kagome," he told her gently. Pressing a soft kiss to the shell of her ear, he continued, "Your family is important to you. I'd never let anything happen to them." Then, softer yet louder at the same time, "I'd never let anything happen to you, if I could help it."

That made her gut wrench and heart swell and it made her cry harder.

He held her close as she did.

#inukag #inukag fluff #inukag fanfic #inuyasha fic #inuyasha fanfiction #inuyasha x kagome #💞.writing

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theragethatisdesire · 10 months

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much ado about nothing chapter 4 - plug!eren x reader, 18+!!!

DISCLAIMER: this post contains MATURE CONTENT that is intended only for those over 18. minors and ageless blogs, please do not read below the cut.

hiiiii again!! here to update you on our lovely reader and her darling eren. now that they've finally done the deed, where does it leave them? will the one night only rule stand? time to learn a little more about our eren...i hope you guys love it so much, i had to play around a LOT with this one to get everything set up for the next chapter. pay attention because every detail counts!!

want to get caught up? series masterlist here :)

chapter-specific cws: alcohol, swearing, mentions of smut but no actual smut, crying in the club

“If it proves so, then loving goes by haps; Some Cupid kills with arrows, some with traps.” Much Ado About Nothing by William Shakespeare (Act III, Scene 2)

“I was worried sick! Sick!” Historia cries as you enter your apartment, still wearing Eren’s obnoxious Grill Dad t-shirt. “You never texted me, never told me you were staying over, and…what is that shirt? Ew.”

“It’s what I woke up in. Tragic, I know.” Not a complete lie, if you ignore the part where Eren ripped it off of you immediately upon waking, pulling you into his lap to ride him for the umpteenth time.

“Woke up in? It’s four in the afternoon. Did you forget we have plans with Sasha?”

You nearly smack your forehead– you do have plans, it’s Saturday night, which means you're due at Scout’s. “Shit, yeah, I did forget.”

“Get ready then,” Historia gives you a knowing once-over, “you look like you’ve been hit by a truck.”

“Quit flirting with me.”

You drag your tired heap of a body into the shower, wanting nothing more than to lay in your bed for all eternity and kick your feet like a schoolgirl, thinking about last night. You and Eren had stayed up all night. Making burgers on the back porch in your matching t-shirts and underwear had turned into him bending you over the kitchen counter, grading your quizzes had turned into a competition of who could hold out the longest with the other’s head between their legs, the shower had turned into you on your knees, swallowing him down your sore throat. You had talked about everything and nothing until you passed out, wrapped in each other, and woke up only to do the same thing all over again.

Historia is absolutely correct. You do look like you’ve been hit by a truck, and you feel like it too. Your cunt throbs between your legs, fucked raw time and time again, and bruises litter your skin, from your hips to your arms to your collarbones, gifted to you by Eren’s mouth and hands. Your fingers trace absentmindedly along a particularly nasty one on your shoulder, and you shudder.

The hot water feels godsent against your skin until you hear the door creak open. You roll your eyes, brace yourself for the interrogation.

“So?” Historia calls over the water.

“So?”

“Don’t be stupid. How was it?”

“Can it wait for Scout’s? I’m going to have to say it all over again to Sasha, anyway.” You’re playing coy; really, you could talk about your night for hours. How he held you, how all the rumors were true, how cute he looked grilling for you. Hours.

“Fine,” Historia sighs dramatically, “most of it can. At least tell me if the rumors are true or not. I’ve literally been dying to know, and Ymir won’t hypothesize with me.”

You poke your head out through the curtain, grinning like a maniac. “It’s huge.”

“Like, objectively huge?”

“Like, bigger-than-I’ve-ever-seen-outside-of-porn huge.”

“So it was good?” Historia returns your half-crazed smile, only making your own grow.

“So good.”

“Aaah!” Historia squeals, reaching through the curtain to grab your hand excitedly. “I literally have to hear everything. Every. Single. Thing. Hurry up and get ready, Sasha’s off at 5:30.”

You do hurry, flying out the door with wet hair, nothing more than a tinted moisturizer on your face and Historia on your arm, skipping and giggling the whole way to Scout’s like schoolgirls. Sasha greets you with stale peanuts and a round of drinks, something fruity and horrible like most of Sasha’s choices, but you’re too excited to comment on it, settling on your stool with a long sip. Just as you’re about to bring up your night, the details fizzing on your tongue like sweet champagne, Sasha leans over Historia to grin at you.

“Guess who got laid last night?” Sasha crows, pointing her fingers at herself. Historia and you both glance at each other, frowning in confusion.

“Wait, what? Who did you hook up with?” Historia tilts her head.

Sasha bites her lips and wiggles her eyebrows. “Hitch. Didn’t you two meet her at Eren’s? She’s like, so gorgeous.”

“What?” You and Historia shriek simultaneously, drinks forgotten.

“You didn’t even tell us–”

“When did you get her number–”

“She’s a lesb–”

“Okay, okay, chill,” Sasha laughs, holding her hands out in front of her, “I got her number the other day from Connie, and yes, she’s bi. Huge win for the gays, if you ask me.”

“Is it anything? Or just, like, a one-night stand?” You venture, voicing your own concern without realizing it. Sasha swats her hand through the air.

“One night for sure,” she says, “you know me, I’m like a tumbleweed. Just blowing on through, and onto the next.”

You visibly flinch. Just blowing on through, and onto the next. That was what you were doing, right? And Eren, too. You slurp the rest of your fruity drink down, flagging Levi over for a beer more to your taste. Historia’s got a pair of pitying eyes trained on you– fuck, it’s annoying how she can practically read your mind– but you don’t care. Drowning your sorrows before they can begin is a perfectly acceptable option in your mind.

“Um…I know someone else that got laid last night,” Historia ventures, smiling encouragingly at you.

“Finally!” Sasha pumps her fist obnoxiously. “Eren?”

Your face warms. “Yeah.”

“How was it?” Sasha’s practically squealing, ignoring the side eye that the Captain shoots her. “Is it really that big?”

“Um,” you hesitate, suddenly feeling bashful.

“Yes,” Historia’s eyes sparkle, “tell her!”

“Well,” your smile grows a little with her encouragement, “the rumors are true. It’s huge, and he was like–”

“I knew it!” Sasha jeers. Levi walks over, shooting her a glare.

“Be quiet,” you push her lightly, “I was saying, he was like, the best fuck I’ve ever had, hands down. I mean, literally all night and all morning. Oh, and it was so embarrassing, when he was cooking breakfast–”

Sasha interrupts you with a frown. “Breakfast? You slept over?”

You return her knitted-brow expression. “Well, yeah. Is something wrong with that?”

“No, it’s just weird,” Sasha mulls her words over before spilling, “Hitch and I got to gossiping, and he just…well, I don’t want to kill your vibe, but from everything Hitch said, he seems like a one-and-done kind of guy.”

“It’s still just a one night stand. I don’t think it matters all that much that I slept over.” You shrug, ignoring the sinking feeling in your stomach. That was what you had agreed upon with yourself, one and done, and it should be music to your ears that Eren’s to eventually fade out of your life now that you’ve gotten the sex out of the way, but it’s just not relieving you like it should.

“And he made you breakfast?”

“Well, he tried. We sort of got…occupied and burnt everything,” you flush, “but he did make some kickass burgers the night before, so no harm no foul.”

Sasha and Historia exchange a look, one you don’t understand, and one you’re not sure you want to pick apart.

“I mean, knowing Eren, that’s crazy. When he was hooking up with Amy back in the day, he would like, summon her in the middle of the night and call her Uber home before she could even get her panties back on,” Sasha laughs to herself, seemingly unaware of the stunned expression all over your face.

You know his history, and yet it still surprises you that the Eren with the silly t-shirts, the Eren that had insisted on grading your students’ quizzes with a pink glitter pen, the Eren that had debated anime lore with you until the wee hours of the morning was the same Eren that Sasha was describing.

“To be fair, he’s only like that because of Breeze,” Historia points out, “he’s not a total asshole.”

“Breeze?” You ran through the mental list of people you knew that were associated with Eren, but you had never heard a Breeze in the mix. You hated her name already, so manic-pixie-dream-girl that your brain was already doing you the favor of painting a picture of her. Beautiful, artsy, effortlessly cool. Blech.

“His ex,” Sasha explains, “apparently he was so in love with her back in college, like beyond in love, buy-a-ring kind of in love.”

“Okay,” you say slowly, “what does that have to do with anything?”

Sasha raises her eyebrows as if it should have been obvious. “Breeze dumping him is what started his whole ‘womanizer’ thing. Apparently she really did a number on him. Like, that’s why he pumps and dumps like crazy. If I had a dollar for every girl I’ve heard of that cried over Eren, I could afford to tip Levi until he actually liked me.”

What the hell? You can feel your face contort in annoyance, trying to mask the way the idea of Eren just adding you to the notches in his bedpost hurts something small and already wounded deep in your chest, but Historia beats you to the chase.

“Don’t say it like that,” Historia nudges Sasha meaningfully, “you’re going to ruin it for her.”

“I’m not, if you would let me finish. Hitch just told me not to let you get your feelings hurt when he kicked you out, but I guess we don’t have to worry about that. You must have something magic in between your legs.” Sasha pinches your thigh with a crude smile. You swat her away, irritated.

“How would Hitch even know–”

“Okay, be serious here,” Historia cuts you off with an eye roll, “you two were all over each other when we went to Armin’s little pregame. Anyone with eyes would know you two were going to fuck each other silly at some point.”

“It’s not like we went out to a candlelit dinner or anything,” you scoff, “it was literally just sex.”

Sasha offers you a sheepish half-smile. “No, I know I just…I told her about your history with that kind of stuff. She was worried.”

“God, Sasha, why would you do that?” You rub your hands over your face miserably. “That’s so embarrassing. What if she tells Eren and he thinks I’m going to, like, fall all over myself just because we hooked up?”

“It just came up!”

“No point in denying it, especially not after Luke.” Historia looks at you pointedly, knowing the weight that that particular name held. You sort of want to smack her, but you haven’t heard his name in so long that you’re frozen. “But it sounds like it was fun, I think you needed it. A little TLC, if you will.”

Your heart thuds in a way it hasn’t in months, in a way it shouldn’t. “I don’t know what you expect me to say. It was late, it was just easier to fall asleep there, it wasn’t some fucking rom-com.”

“Mhm,” Historia eyes you, sipping her drink. You roll your eyes.

“I’m serious. I was dead after everything was said and done. I didn’t even realize I was asleep until I woke up.” Again, not a complete lie. Not exactly, at least. You decide to omit that Eren had brushed your hair softly with his fingers, pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead, whispered a goodnight against your skin, woken you up with his head between your legs and his fingers threaded through yours. Those moments feel better nestled in your consciousness, just for you.

“What, did he wear you out?” Sasha smiles evilly at you. The excitement crops back up in your chest– you realize you haven’t even gotten into half of the antics of the night before.

“Honestly, it was so good that I–” you’re cut off by a familiar weight slinging around your shoulders. Shit.

“Talking about my burgers, right?” Eren’s materialized out of nowhere, smirking at you. Your face burns bright red.

Historia grins wickedly. “Yeah, she was telling us all about your burgers.”

“Stor!” You smack at her, embarrassed.

Eren ignores your chagrin, studying you until a little smile curls his mouth. “You look pretty.”

It’s simple, but it makes your stomach do a backflip. You need to get away from him, get away from what he’s already doing to you, but to your own disappointment, you know you’ll sit firmly on this barstool as long as he stands beside you. “I literally got out of the shower and came straight here.”

“So?” Eren smiles wider, thumbing at your lip. “Pretty.”

“What are you even doing here? Stalking me now?”

“Of course,” Eren shrugs, reaching over the bar to grab his beer from Levi’s ice well, a habit you don’t think you’ll ever get used to, “didn’t get a chance to murder you last night, so I’m here to finish the job.”

You’re confused until Historia pipes up. “Not funny, Jaeger. She wasn’t answering her phone!”

Eren scoffs. “Texting someone to ask if they’ve murdered your friend isn’t really a great game plan if you think she’s getting stabbed to death.”

“You did what?” You turn on your friend, eyes blazing.

“I was just checking,” Historia shrugs, unbothered, “he could be some psycho.”

“He’s not some psycho,” you roll your eyes at her, “haven’t you known each other for like, five years?”

“Are you sure?” Eren leans in, voice low and hot against the shell of your ear just like it had been last night as he pounded into you. The memory makes your chest tighten. “Might do all sorts of awful things to you if you’re not careful.”

“Don’t be a menace,” you muster up enough composure to shove him back away from your face, laughing lightly as if he hadn’t just made you weak in the knees.

“Can’t promise anything,” Eren chuckles, sipping his beer, “Armin and Connie will be here any minute, so it’ll go one of two ways. Either I’m babysitting Connie, or I’m going to make an ass of myself. Guess we’re rolling the dice.”

“You’re not working tonight?”

“Sort of,” Eren shrugs, “just a couple guys coming in, so I actually might have fun for once.”

“For once,” you repeat, letting a wicked smile tug at your lips. “Didn’t have fun last night?”

“I think you know exactly how much fun I had last night,” Eren digs his thumb into the bruise at the junction of your neck and shoulder, like he’d memorized exactly where he’d marked you. God knows he had seen you naked enough times to have the opportunity.

“A-Armin!” You choke out a greeting, relieved to see your mutual friend approaching before you completely lose the remaining self-control you have and tackle Eren in the middle of the bar. “Hi! It’s good to see you.”

“What’s it been, six hours now?” Armin smirks at you knowingly. You nearly cover your face in shame. Eren has an open-door policy with his closest friends, something you discovered this morning when Armin had strolled into the kitchen to find you sitting on the kitchen counter in nothing but a t-shirt and your panties, Eren between your legs and kissing you passionately amidst the smell of burning toast.

“She slept over?” Connie’s approached now, eyebrows raised as if Armin had just suggested that you’d run a marathon this morning. Maybe Sasha’s tidbit of gossip did hold some weight. Something flutters in your stomach, something you need to drown with a long swig of beer. “What, did you buy her flowers, too?”

“Mind your fucking business, dude,” Eren spits at him, unusually terse.

“Minding my business,” Connie holds his hands up defensively, eyes wide.

“Are you always this crabby, or are you just on your period?” you ask Eren, smiling up at him good-naturedly.

“Just don’t want them giving you any shit,” Eren shrugs, points at Historia and Sasha, “you’ve got these two for that.”

“They’ve been working overtime, trust me.” You narrow your eyes at Historia and Sasha, who widen their eyes innocently. Eren’s phone buzzes on the counter; he scowls when he checks it.

“Yo, get a load of this asshole,” he calls to Armin, “not walking with that much on me. Come to the Kappa house. What does this guy think I am, fucking UberEats?”

“He buys a lot, though,” Armin says thoughtfully, pausing in his conversation with Sasha to amble over and take a closer look at Eren’s phone.

“Yeah bro, I wouldn’t be saying ‘no’ to the dude dropping $1,500 every two weeks,” Connie agrees, nodding behind his beer. Eren groans.

“You think I should go?”

“Probably,” Armin smiles regretfully, patting Eren’s back, “but it’s around the corner, won’t even take you ten minutes.”

“I’ll come with you, if you want,” Connie says, noticing that Levi’s pointedly ignoring his efforts to order a drink.

Eren glares at Armin, slides his gaze over to you. “I’m sorry this keeps happening, do you mind? I’ll be back in five.”

“Don’t stress on my account,” you laugh, “get to work, you.”

“Five minutes,” Eren promises, abandoning his drink and heading for the door, muttering and swearing under his breath. That leaves you with Armin, who you can’t help but feel guilty around after the incident earlier today.

“So,” you let a deep breath fill your lungs, looking at Armin sheepishly, “I’m sorry about this morning. Obviously we weren’t expecting company.”

Armin waves you off, chuckling. “Don’t worry about it. Wouldn’t be the first time me or Eren walked in on each other in a compromising position.”

You raise an eyebrow, intrigued. “Oh? Do tell.”

“My lips are sealed,” Armin mimes locking his mouth with a key, “although…”

“What?”

“I can’t say I’ve walked in on anything quite so…domestic recently,” he grins. You frown, wishing more than anything that everyone would stop playing into this idea that you and Eren had a “thing” going on. Sure, he gave you butterflies and cooked you breakfast and all of the shit that people that had a “thing” together did, but it’s been one night, and you know you need to hold your horses before you drop your glass heart all over the sidewalk again.

“I wasn’t aware that one night stands were so serious these days,” you grumble into your beer. Armin laughs again, rubbing your shoulder.

“I’m just teasing you. Eren’s just…not the type to do breakfast in the morning, so you must be something special.”

You’re only capable of a wavering smile in return, already feeling the raw plucking of your overactive heartstrings in your chest. You knew this would happen if you took a chance on him, knew you were playing with fire, but you couldn’t help yourself, and now it’s biting you in the ass.

With your mind wandering into a terribly nostalgic state, you have half a mind to up and leave, especially when Armin wanders back over to Sasha to continue whatever fervent conversation they were having about Game of Thrones. Historia bringing Luke up sure didn’t help to quell the horrible twisting in your stomach; even hearing his name makes the hair on your arms stand up. You can feel the ghost of a shark tooth necklace dangling over you, digging into the back of your head as a pair of arms wrap around you. A booming laugh, sky-blue eyes…

Historia seems to be able to gather as much based on the look on your face, leaning over and placing a sympathetic hand on your arm.

“Are you okay? You seem…off.”

“I wish you wouldn’t have brought Luke up.” Your words lack the venom you want to unleash, sagging under the weight of your heavy heart. Historia nods understandingly.

“I know. It was so long ago, I didn’t know if it was still bugging you.”

“It’s not bugging me, I just wish that he…” you rub at your eyes, not even entirely sure of what you wish of him. Your admission comes out quiet, wounded. “I wish it had never happened.”

“But that’s why you need to move on,” Historia insists, rubbing your shoulder, “to get over someone, you have to get under someone else. That’s like, the rule of breakups.”

“It wasn’t a breakup, we weren’t even dating.” You feel guilty, in a way, for dragging down the mood. You’d run in here, all sunshine and aching legs, ready for a fun night of recounting every nasty detail of your time with Eren, and you hate how just the thought of Luke can pull you right back between your own bedsheets, curled around a carton of ice cream and surrounded by used tissues.

“Hey,” Historia lowers her voice, “just because he was too stupid to throw a label on it doesn’t mean it wasn’t real, okay?”

“It’s ridiculous that I’m still this hung up on him, though. Like, it’s pathetic.”

“It’s not pathetic, but you’re not giving yourself a chance. You had your little fling with Floch—which again, yuck—and now you need to start opening your heart instead of your legs.”

“Poetic, Stor.”

“You’re not the only one who has a way with words,” Historia grins proudly.

“I just don’t even know where to start,” you admit, feeling a dangerous pressure behind your eyes. Fuck, you aren’t doing this, are you? Crying in Scouts over a guy that hasn’t even spoken to you in six months?

“Eren might be a good place to–”

“No,” you snap, “don’t even start with that, okay? Eren and I just met, and it was a one night thing anyway. Besides, it’s…it’s too soon. I’m just not ready to date again.”

“You are,” Historia insists, “you just don’t want to let go of him yet.”

Jesus, you are doing this. You go to respond and cut yourself off with a sniffle, wiping desperately underneath your eyes to mediate the salty tears threatening to slide down your cheeks.

The master of perfect timing today, Eren appears in the doorway, searching the room and locking his eyes on you. You can see the different emotions flicker across his face: happy to confused to concerned. Damn it. You duck behind Historia, grabbing her purse out of her lap and digging around for tissues.

“What happened?” Eren’s behind you, rubbing a large hand between your shoulder blades. You want to bolt for the bathroom and come back out refreshed as if nothing ever happened, but something tells you Eren won’t be so easily shaken off.

“Eren,” Historia sighs, snatching her purse back from you and finding a pack of tissues quickly, handing you one, “I don’t think this is the best time–”

“It’s fine, it’s nothing,” you dab at your tears, “Historia was just telling me about her…her dead grandma, and I got a little emotional, that’s all.”

Eren cocks an eyebrow at Historia, who’s glaring at you. “Dead grandma, huh?”

“They were very close,” Historia lies effortlessly, giving you a sharp pinch of punishment on your thigh.

“I’m buying a round,” Connie nods determinedly, flagging down Levi, much to the barkeep’s dismay, “no crying over dead grandmas tonight. We’re having fun, damn it.”

Historia pales. “I don’t know if that’s–”

“Tequila,” you cut her off, “thanks.”

Connie nods at you, so unusually solemn that you almost feel bad for your little white lie. “When my grandma died, I was a wreck. I’ve got you.”

“Nana’s not even dead!” Historia whispers urgently in your ear, still shooting daggers at you.

“I panicked!” You whisper-shout back, eyes wide. Historia rolls her eyes and grumbles something, but nods along.

“Tequila again?” Eren makes a face, slipping his arm around your waist– fuck, you really wish he’d stop touching you so casually, as if it wasn’t enough to spark a fire in your core– and reaching over the bar for a new beer.

“Well…grandmas are a very sensitive topic for me, so yes, tequila.” You can’t hide the snark in your voice, but you’re not sure where it’s coming from. Eren frowns, removes his arm from you.

“I was just worried, sorry if I overstepped.”

You throw your shot back, shaking your head at the taste. Your hands scramble around for the lime that you set on the bar, Eren chuckling beside you despite himself. Once you’ve collected yourself, feeling the haze of the liquor hit you like a truck, you face him.

“You didn’t overstep,” you sigh, “I just…you know when a bad memory pops up in your mind, and you can’t really get it out, and then all your feelings just start coming out and you can’t– okay, I sound crazy, but I swear I’m not. Maybe it’s just like, a girl thing or something.”

To your surprise, Eren doesn’t look absolutely horrified at your haywire emotions. He only nods, looking at you thoughtfully. It occurs to you that he’s beginning to realize that you are not, in fact, crying over Historia’s very-much-alive grandmother.

“Actually, yeah, I do understand. It’s the worst.” Something about the earnest tone in his voice soothes you, makes you drop your shoulders from where they’re hunched and tense. “Are you sure you don’t want to talk about it?”

“Positive. Can we just pretend that I’m not crying at the bar for no reason like a crazy person?”

Eren laughs and nods, mercifully deciding not to press you any further, redirecting your attention to where Connie and Sasha are now pelting each other with peanuts. The night ambles on, jokes are exchanged, more shots are taken, and before you know it, it’s reached near eleven. You check your watch and groan; in a little more than seven hours, you’ll be waking up at what’s seemingly the ass-crack of dawn to make a fresh weekly syllabus for the rising English experts of America. A hefty sigh leaves you as you set your phone down, recline back into Eren’s chest where he’s got both arms tossed around your shoulders.

“What is it?” Eren murmurs, nibbling on your ear. You swallow the swell of arousal rising in your throat; that little voice in the back of your head reminding you of your just one night! rule grows quieter.

“I need to wake up early,” you admit, playing with his fingers, “need to leave.”

“We can leave,” Eren doesn’t move from his position, placing a kiss behind your ear that sends goosebumps running up and down your arms, “‘m ready if you are.”

“Leave alone,” you chuckle, finally breaking free of his grip to spin on your barstool and face him. He’s pouting, a little furrow between his brows and a sad glint to his eyes. You have to consciously stop yourself from pulling his face down to yours, pressing your lips to his.

“Alone?”

“I have work to do in the morning.” You’re nervously chewing on your bottom lip, showing your own dishonesty. In truth, you don’t care what time you have to limp over to the library, but you fucked him just last night. And this morning. And over lunch this afternoon. Are you really so insatiable that you can’t follow your one-night-only rule, have to break your fast this soon?

“Even better,” Eren grins, “wasn’t I helpful last night?”

“No,” you roll your eyes, “not exactly.”

“Guess you’ll have to teach me, then.”

“I…” you trail off, how can you even begin to say “no” to a guy this gorgeous?

“You?” Eren cocks an eyebrow.

“I’m not really looking for anything right now.” Blue eyes. Red lips. The shark tooth necklace. It’s a bad response, too vague and too assuming, but it’s all you can come up with.

“Me neither,” Eren shrugs, something unreadable flickering over his features, “but we have fun together. Doesn’t have to be anything serious.”

"I'm not saying it does," god, you are so bad at this, "casual hookups just aren't the best thing for me."

"If we're going to stick a label on it," Eren muses, swirling the beer in his bottle around, "why not friends? With some...benefits?"

"Are we friends?"

"Are we not?"

You’re about to offer another feeble excuse, ignoring the way your heart cracks a little in your chest, when Eren’s phone buzzes on the bar. His eyes flit over to it, and something strange happens. Eren’s cool confidence slides right off of him, a look of…what? Bewilderment? Panic? Something comes across his face, something shaking and fragile and hurt. He snatches his phone off of the bar, angling it so you can’t see, staring at it intently.

“Eren?” you venture, raising a hand to grab his arm in concern, but thinking better of it, and shrinking away. “You okay?”

Eren blinks at you, like he can’t quite remember who you are. “What?”

“Are you okay? You seem…shaken.”

“Yeah, m’fine,” he shrugs you off, pain glittering behind his eyes.

“But you–”

“Said I’m fine.” Eren’s voice is harsh, close to a bark. You visibly flinch, a frown contorting your face. You don’t know him well, but even you can tell that this isn’t like him.

“Okay,” you say, quiet and wounded. An awkward silence settles between you both; you need to leave, but you’re unsure of how to make your move after that. It doesn’t necessarily seem like he wants your company anymore, but the idea of leaving him there so upset isn’t appealing either.

“You ready?” Historia’s voice, dripping with drunkenness, floats over your shoulder.

“Yeah.” You haven’t taken your eyes off of him, waiting for something, anything that might betray what’s going on in his head. Eren’s still staring at his phone, but when you voice your approval to Historia, he turns.

“Leaving?”

“Guess so.” You throw a thumb over your shoulder to where Sasha’s practically falling out of her barstool, demanding a piggy-back ride home from Connie. Eren sighs, something weighted and hefty.

“Sorry I’m being weird, it’s just–”

“We don’t need to talk about it. I get it.” You force a smile onto your face. Maybe you won’t be sleeping with Eren anytime soon, but against all odds, you already care about him, that damned too-big heart of yours thumping sadly in your chest at the defeated expression on his face.

“C’mere.” Eren tugs you to him, hugging you tighter than he ever has. You feel his lips crushing into the part in your hair, as if you’re something precious to him, something valuable. It makes your knees weak, makes alarm bells ring in your head. “I’ll tell you someday, alright? Just…not now.”

You nod against his chest, a watery, wet feeling gathering behind your ribs. “Okay. Only if you want to.”

When Eren pulls out of the embrace, he’s smiling again, light and breezy as if nothing had happened. “You strike me as a good listener.”

“Guilty as charged.”

"See?" Eren offers a small smile. "Friends."

You're so relieved to see that little smile grace his features that you can't argue the point with him any further. You smile back. "Friends."

“Get home safe, okay?”

"I always do. Stop worrying so much," you swipe playfully at his shoulder. It’s been a dizzying night, but the unwavering stability that Eren’s presence offers still grounds you, eases the butterflies in your stomach.

“Never.” Eren waves you off with a wink, and you collect your friends, heading for the exit. When you toss one last look over your shoulder, expecting to meet his playful gaze, you only find Eren frowning at his phone screen, peeling the label off of his beer bottle. Friends.

#eren x reader #eren jaeger x reader #eren jaeger series #aot x reader #snk x reader #snk series #aot series #aot fanfic #eren jaeger fanfic #eren jaeger fanfiction #much ado about nothing

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honeytonedhottie · 8 months

Note

so you're my only hope and i really wish for your advice. it's humiliating to say my story but i really need help. so i was misdiagnosed with schizofrenia (i 100% know i'm healthy) i need to lie that i have schizofrenia because my mother needs money. and here comes my desires : revision and desired age/grade level and maaany more. i have no responsibilities literally zero! the way i manifest is i walk around my room and viseualise, affirm and overall manifest which is fun but the thing is do you think i should build healthy day routine instead of just pacing around my room all day long? could you provide me a routine? thank you for help because yall are saving me for real. it could be even self care habits to do every day anything to avoid pacing around

thank you for coming to me 💗 and im so sorry about ur story. im so happy that you know the law because you deserve all of ur desires and more!! 💗

so to build a healthy routine and schedule for urself. doing so builds discipline. im gonna give u some healthy habits, a morning and evening routine, and resources for those things. a good place to start tho is making a weekly agenda that changes with the week, something to switch things up every week. just make one 💗💗💗

—healthy habits🩰⊹ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ♡̴ ⋆⁺₊⋆

♡ moving ur body/pilates - i personally do pilates and i recommend it to literally everybody. but the basic idea is to move around (and that does not mean pacing in ur bedroom) i mean get ur blood flowing and get moving. it doesn’t have to be pilates it can be running, a sport, dancing, yoga etc

here’s a link to one of the pilates workouts that i recommend if ur a beginner :

♡ get a hobby - some hobby recommendations: if u are good at writing try poetry, try teaching urself how to draw or paint or sculpt, learn how to dance, learn how to play an instrument, learn a sport, learn languages, become a good cook, write stories, start a blog, learn to sew or crotchet, learn tech, read lots of books, watch/listen to lots of podcasts. literally just get busy

♡ meditating and journaling - this is so good not only for ur mental health but it can also improve focus and keep u grounded. keep a journal or start meditating every day

here’s a link to a guided meditation for self love :

youtube

♡ self care - i LOVE self care. literally practice self care every single day. take care of ur nails, skin, hair, lashes EVERYTHING. be super intentional with ur self care bcuz it tells our brains that we are worthy of effort and it’ll LITERALLY make u feel like a princess.

♡ manifesting - you mentioned that u wanted to do some revision so something that i recommend for revising is using SATS. or state akin to sleep. once ur in state akin to sleep go back in ur mind and revise whatever u want. or just do SATS before bed every night. this is such a powerful manifesting tool

♡ sleep - aim to get between eight to ten hours of sleep a night. you’ll look better, feel better, and your physical and mental health will just skyrocket

—morning🌸⊹ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ♡̴ ⋆⁺₊⋆

♡̴ first thing in the morning, fix ur bed

♡ open the blinds/windows if the sun is out, this all depends on what time u wake up but if the sun isn’t out just skip this step

♡ stretch for a couple minutes

♡ write down at least three things that ur grateful for (don’t write down what u aren’t grateful for AT THAT MOMENT, literally just write down three things that ur grateful for right then and there)

♡ brush ur teeth and use a tongue scraper

♡ have a glass of water with some lemon slices

♡ take a warm shower and moisturize

♡ skincare routine

♡ put on an outfit that makes u feel pretty

♡ if u get nauseous when u eat breakfast then try eating something light, but if that doesn’t work then listen to ur body and just skip breakfast. if that’s not the case tho eat a balanced breakfast

THEN GET TO WORK ON YOUR AGENDA THAT I MENTIONED IN THE BEGINNING<3

—evening🍥⊹ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ♡̴ ⋆⁺₊⋆

♡ take a warm shower and moisturize

♡ 30-60 minutes of self care and pampering

♡ make a yummy dinner that’s nourishing

♡ read for 20 minutes or watch something that enriches u

♡ evening yoga

♡ drink water 15 minutes before bed

THEN GO TO SLEEP AND HAVE SWEET DREAMS <3

this is just an idea, or a basic guideline to follow if u need it. customize it to ur specific needs and day-to-day life. im so excited for all ur desires to manifest cuz u deserve it! mwah 💗💗💗

#self care #law of assumption #self concept #it girl #becoming that girl #self love #manifesting #loa tumblr #neville goddard #that girl #dream girl #it girl energy #advice #daily routine #self care routine

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manicplank · 1 month

Text

The Color Pink (Part 6)

This fic is going to go on forever I love noisecouple so much.

Hazel's alarm went off in the morning. She turned it off without hesitation as opposed to her usual grumpiness. She had an extra pep in her step. She brushed her teeth and swished mouthwash before spitting it out. She hummed as she washed her face and applied moisturizer. She brushed her hair before she added a slight upward curl to the ends. She dressed up in her usual uniform.

She strutted down to the cafe with no fear. She couldn't seem to wipe the smile off her face. She unlocked the door, the bell above it rang as she walked in. Before she reached halfway to the counter, the bell rang again. She turned around. It was The Vigilante. He seemed to be disturbed. "Oh, hi Vi-"

"HAZEL!" He interrupted her. "YOU'RE ALIVE!"

"What? Of course I'm alive. I'm more alive than I've ever been in my entire life!" She twirled and giggled.

"So... he didn't try to kill ya?"

"Who?"

"The Noise!"

"Nope! In fact, our date went incredibly well! He actually asked if I would be willing to go on another date!"

"Really?!"

"Yep! Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get the coffee started."

"Well, I'll see ya at the counter."

The Vigilante got up on a stool as Hazel walked behind the counter. She didn't close well the night before, so she had a bit of extra work to do. It didn't bother her, though. It was worth it considering she had an amazing date. She put the pots on and filled the tanks with water. She poured ground coffee into the filters and began the brew cycle. She grabbed the dishes from the night before from the drying rack and put them away. The Vigilante pulled out a newspaper and opened it up. As he read it, Hazel placed a mug in front of him and filled it with fresh, hot black coffee. "Thank you, dear," he smiled.

"So, when are you gonna admit it?"

"Huh? Admit what?"

"That you were wrong." Hazel tilted her head with a smug smile.

The Vigilante sighed. "I won't admit anything just yet. It's too early. Just wait 'til he shows his true colors. It'll take some time, but it'll happen."

Hazel rolled her eyes. "Why are you so negative? Why can't you let me make my own mistakes?"

"I'm just trying to protect you."

"I don't need your protection! I appreciate it your concern, but I'm more than capable of taking care of myself."

"Sorry, I didn't mean to upset you."

"Well, you did."

Theodore went in to work that day with a different attitude. He didn't seem as stoic and crabby as he usually was. It could be felt in the air. He walked into set and saw everything in the right place. He headed over to his dressing room. A sweet woman from the Gnome Forest knocked and walked in. "Mornin', Mr. Noise!"

"Mornin', love."

"Well, someone's spry today!"

"Yeah. I'm feeling good."

She pulled out some concealer and foundation as well as a blending sponge. She also pulled out some skin colored powder and a nude color palette. The Noise sat back in his chair and closed his eyes. She flipped a switch, and the lights around the mirror lit up. "So," she spoke, "what's got you so happy?"

"Uhh, it's kind of personal."

She pulled back and gave him a look.

He laughed, "Don't look at me like that! It's nothing dirty."

She chuckled. "I'm just giving you sass. It's okay if you don't want to tell me. As long as you're happy, I'm pleased."

"Of course, you are. Makes your job easier, doesn't it, Mary?"

"It sure does!" She grabbed a concealer that was a few shades lighter than his skin. She applied it around his eyes and blended it with the sponge. "Still got those dark circles, though."

He sighed. "Always and forever."

Mary applied powder from the palette to set the concealer. "Now I'm curious as to what's making you so happy."

"What? I can't just have a good day?"

She giggled. She applied foundation all around his face with a brush. She took the sponge and began to blend it in. "Well, after you acting so strange all week... I can't help but wonder what's going on with you." She stopped. "Oh, no..."

The Noise opened his eyes and furrowed his brow. "What?"

"Are you... doing okay?"

"What do you mean?"

"Please, honey, tell me this isn't the surge."

"The surge?"

"When some people are depressed or sick, they get a surge of energy and joy, before..."

"Oh! Oh, no no no no no!"

Mary sighed with relief. "Oh, thank goodness. My heart sank." She dipped a small pad in the powdered foundation and pat it all over his face.

"No, I have something to look forward to, especially lately."

"Is it a woman?"

His eyes widened, and he cleared his throat. "Um..."

"It is!"

"Shhh! Don't say anything! I don't want that getting leaked into the media!"

"Your secret is safe with me. So... Tell me all about her."

"It's a little early... We just went on our first date yesterday."

"And?"

"It went well. I mean, at least I think it did."

She blew on his face, and all the excess powder was off. "If this is the mood that one date put you in, then my fingers are crossed that it lasts."

"Just please don't say anything. I don't want the paparazzi swarming her and scaring her away. I want to take things slow."

"You like her," Mary teased.

"Shush!"

She laughed again and pat him on the shoulder. "You're all set. I'll leave you to get changed."

Theodore looked in the mirror as Mary left the room. He couldn't believe he just admitted to someone that he liked her... He got into his costume one leg at a time. He was flexible enough to zip the zipper on his back. He tied the cape around his shoulders. He sighed again as he grabbed his mask and put it over his head. "Alright," he aired, "let's do this."

"Cut," the director Noisy shouted. "Great job, everyone! Noise, you were incredible today! Much better than you were the other day." The Noise smiled and shrugged. "No, seriously," the director continued, "I think that was one of your best performances yet! Keep that up, and this movie's gonna be great!" Mary looked over at him and winked. His eyes grew wide, and he blushed. While the others went over to mingle, Theodore headed back to his dressing room. He took off his mask and untied the cape. He grabbed a pack of cleansing wipes from one of the drawers and cleaned the makeup off his face. He thought about her all day. He acted as if she was there watching him. He couldn't shake the idea of what she would think of him. For some reason, he wanted to impress her. He unzipped his costume and let it fall. He changed into sweatpants and a hoodie. As he made his way out of the building, a few people tried to stop and talk to him. "Sorry," he said, "I'm tired. I wanna go home and catch a nap."

Theodore took out a cigarette as he walked home. It was only a short walk, but sometimes it was nagging. He thought that he might head to the cafe and grab a coffee since he felt a bit groggy after work, but he didn't want to seem desperate or clingy. Though, he did want to see her again. He shrugged it off and continued walking as he smoked. He walked through his door and locked it behind him. He suddenly felt super lethargic. He yawned as he dragged himself to his bed. He laid down and closed his eyes. Before he knew it, he was asleep.

He woke up to his phone ringing beside him. He checked the number, but he didn't recognize it. He answered it tiredly, "Hello...?"

"Hey, it's me!"

"Who???"

"Hazel."

"Oh!" He sat up. "Sorry, I still haven't saved your number in my contacts. I probably should, huh."

She snickered. "Were you sleeping? You sound tired."

"Yeah, I was napping."

"Theodore..."

"What?"

"It's seven o'clock at night."

"Is it really?!" He looked over at his alarm clock. "Oh shit, it is."

She laughed again. "How long have you been asleep?"

"Well, I got off of work at three, probably got home and laid down at around three fifteen..."

"That's almost four hours!"

"Yeah..."

"Naps are supposed to be like... thirty minutes to an hour."

"Not for me." He lay back down and rested one of his ankles on his bent knee. "My naps can last anywhere from an hour to six hours."

"Sheesh... Was it a rough day at work or something?"

"No, it was actually a great day. Everything went smoothly."

"That's good!"

"How about your day?"

"It was alright. A bit boring. Business at the cafe was slow as usual. The Vigilante came in, but he can be annoying sometimes."

"I don't really care for that guy. He's too uptight."

"Yeah, he uh... doesn't really like you, either."

"That doesn't surprise me."

Hazel lay in her bed on her stomach, kicking her legs back and forth like a little schoolgirl. "Yeah, he sort of chewed me out for going out with you."

"Why?"

"I don't know. He said he was scared you were going to hurt me. He's just being paranoid."

"That's why I don't like him much. I swear, he's got it out for me."

"He thinks you're a criminal."

"Well... He's not entirely wrong."

"Oh, I know. I've seen you on the news. I remember when you were on that Cops show."

He laughed. "Which time?"

"When you broke out of the cuffs and stole the same cop car twice in one night."

He laughed again but harder. "And that doesn't scare you?"

"I'm not a cop."

"Sounds like something a cop would say."

She giggled. "Oh, shut up. You know, between the two of us... I have a criminal record, too."

He gasped and sat up super quickly. "You're shitting me!"

"Nope."

"What did you do?"

"Assault and battery."

"No way. I don't believe you."

"It happened. Some girl was pushing me around and screaming in my face. She slapped me and uh... I sort of lost my temper. I punched her in the nose, and I just kept throwing punches."

"Oh, my god, that is HILARIOUS!"

"I mean, I'm not necessarily proud of it, but..."

"She had to be completely out of line to piss you off that much."

"Yeah. I don't take shit. I have a good temper, but eventually enough is enough."

"I can't believe it. I never would've guessed that coming from you. You're so sweet..."

"Aww, stop. You're the sweet one."

"Only to you."

They laughed together. "Anyways," she continued, "I'm not afraid of you. I don't think you'd do anything to hurt me."

"Of course, not. I don't put my hands on women."

"I could take you."

Theodore cackled. "You what?"

"I could take you in a fight."

"Nuh-uh."

"Yuh-huh!"

"Because I'd let you win."

"Mmm, no, I'd whoop your butt."

"No way."

"Yes way."

"You wouldn't be able to do anything if I picked you up."

"Yes, I would! I'd bite you!"

"Well, just know that I bite back. Hard."

Hazel blushed and giggled. "That wouldn't surprise me. Didn't you get in trouble for biting somebody?"

"Yes, several times."

"I remember seeing something about that. They had to get stitches."

"Mhm. You sure you want to get into a bite fight with me, now?"

"Try me."

"Oh, oh, okay, relax. Someone's got her claws out."

"I guess The Vigilante is just paranoid. He's unusually protective of me. I get where he's coming from, and I appreciate it, but I'm more than capable of taking care of myself. I don't need him to hold my hand. I'd rather that be you."

Theo blushed and giggled. "Oh, stop."

"What? Did I make you bluuush?" She teased.

"Maaaybe."

She giggled again then yawned. "Oh gosh, I can't believe it's already nine!"

"Seriously?! It feels like it's been two minutes..."

"I know. I should get to bed. I have to be up early for the cafe."

"I get it. Your business comes first."

"Goodnight, Theodore."

"Goodnight."

The Noise lay on his back with a grin from ear to ear. His nose and cheeks were pink. He really liked her, he finally was starting to accept it. They had an undeniable chemistry. Something about her made him feel like a teenager again, but it felt good. He stared at the ceiling as he thought about her; her laugh, her smile. He couldn't believe how comfortable she was with him already... and how comfortable he was with her. He was so excited to see her and talk to her again. He wished he had her beside him in his bed as he closed his eyes and drifted off back to sleep.

#pizza tower #noise #the noise #noisette #pizza tower fanfic #fanfic #pink fic

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jenni42085 · 2 years

Text

Sunburnt

“Bunny. . . Bunny.” Chris gently nudged you to wake up. “If little bunny wants to go kayaking with Daddy and Seb you gotta get up.”

Hearing the words kayaking made you perk up a little but you were just enjoying you bed and blanket so much you snuggled deeper in your bed. “No Daddy wanna stay in bed.”

Chris sighs at your snuggled up body. “Bunny remember you promised Seb you would go and we would do snow cones.”

“Snow cones!” You perked up.

“Yes bunny snow cones but only if you get up and go kayaking with Daddy and Seb.” He pulls you out of bed and gives you a hug. He already knows you aren’t a morning person so he carries you into the bathroom for a quick shower.

After your shower he wraps you in your favorite unicorn towel and starts putting sunscreen on you for a base coat. He learned last summer the hard way that your already brown skin needs more protection. You squirm a little but patiently wait for him to finish.

“Daddy, can we do braided pigtails? And my hello kitty bathing suit?“ you ask sweetly while he finishes rubbing sunblock on your back.

He looks at the time and your round brown eyes knowing you are already in littlespace and happy so he doesn’t have you pouty on the river. “Yes bunny but we have to do it quick. Seb will be here soon to get us.”

You squeal and nod at him and grab your hair box. Chris is thankful he learned how to do natural hair when you are feeling little. He detangles and moisturized you naturally curly hair and gets them braided into two braids that go a little past your shoulders. He kisses your forehead as he helps you get dressed. To keep your legs covered a little he put your gray tennis skirt.

Once you see yourself in the mirror you gasp. “Daddy! I look so cute.”

“I know you do Bunny. Now go ahead and grab your backpack and wait by the door for Seb ok?”

“Yes daddy.” You eagerly say as you run off to your playroom where you helped him pack a backpack last night.

Chris finished getting ready and also putting sunblock on himself, he hears the door bell go off and hears your squeal. “Daddy he’s here. Daddy. Daddy. Daddy.”

“Bunny. I heard you sweet heart. Are you sure it’s him? If so then let him in.”

“It’s him. He did our secret knock.” You unlock the door and Seb is dressed in neon board shorts and a white t shirt. He smiles as you run to him as he picks you up with a squeal. “Morning Sebby. Are we going to play in the water today?”

“Good morning sweet princess and yes we are then snow cones but only if you are good and don’t make your daddy upset.” Seb knew you were a little before Chris and always has been intrigued by it and watching you and Chris always made him want a little of his own. Until he finds her, he will spoil you silly and watches you when Chris is out of town. “And if you are really good I’ll get you rainbow floaty.”

He loved watching your eyes perk up. “A real rainbow! I’ll be extra good.”

He set you down on the couch as Chris is coming down the stairs. “Hey man. You ready to go? Looks like Bunny is ready and already promised to be good.”

Chris tilts his head “and what did you promise her in return?”

“Just a new floaty that I already got her but she doesn’t know it yet.”

“Seb you are spoiling my girl too much. I swear. It’s bad enough that I’m wrapped but now you are also.” Chris says with a chuckle.

Seb run his hands through his hair. “I can’t help it. When she is in the headspace everything makes her excited and I love it. Also at least I know what you mean when you saw it’s hard to tell her no.”

At that moment you come into view with your blanket. “I’m ready.”

“Bunny you can’t take the blanket with you. It’ll get wet. How about you hold it until we get there then you leave it in the car.” Chris says. Originally he was going to tell you to leave it at home but saw her face fall a little and didn’t want the tears just yet.

After loading into the car and arriving at the river Chris applied more sunblock to you as you squirmed wanting to play in the water.

“Bunny he is almost done. Ok?” Seb tells you getting you stop moving. “Look what did I tell you all done.”

You turn and give Chris a hug, “thank you daddy. Now the water?”

“Give Seb and me a few moments and we will be ready ok? Go ahead and put on your life vest. Once we are sure you are safe enough I’ll let you take it off.”

“Yes daddy.”

After 20 minutes Chris and Seb were able to get both kayaks tied to a big unicorn inflatable raft. Chris took a two person one for you just because you get panicked easy at times.

“Alright Bunny we are good to go. Where do you want to start off on the raft or with me?” Chris asks while double checking your straps.

“Ummm.” You think about it a minute. “I wanna try the raft first Daddy.”

“Ok Bunny. Now if you need me or Seb blow your whistle. We aren’t that far ahead of you but if I don’t reply then whistle. Do you have your Hello Kitty water bottle?” You give him a nod. “Want me to buckle it to your vest? And words.”

“Yes daddy.” You grab his hand as he walks you into the water where Seb is standing there holding the unicorn still while Chris helped you on it. Your eyes get big as it moves once Seb let’s go.

“You’re ok. I promise.” Seb reassures you. As him and Chris climb into their kayaks. “You ready?”

“Yes Sebby. I think so.” You reply nervously. You wanna be a brave girl so you stretch your legs out in front of you and try to relax.

After two hours the sun starts getting really hot and your body is thirsty. “Daddy.”

“Yes Bunny.” He turns around to look at you. He takes in your pink and red appearance. “Seb we need to pull off soon she looks a little dehydrated.”

Once they pull off into a little island Chris grabs you off the raft and sets you on a rock. “You ok Bunny.”

“I thirsty and tummy hurts.”

“I bet you are. I forgot to make you breakfast before we left. I’m sorry. Let’s get you an uncrustable, some apple slices, and a Gatorade.”

You ate but still don’t feel the best. Once everyone had eaten Seb puts you back on the float. He handed you a frozen water bottle to keep you cool since you already drank all your water.

After a few hours Chris realized he hadn’t heard a peep from you which is not common. He turned to see your body laid out and figured you were just asleep. Finally you guys get to the docking area and when Chris and Seb called to you with no answer got worried.

Chris jumps in the water to get to you. He climbs on the raft making you wake up for a moment. He notices that there is dried vomit on some of the raft and tears in your eyes.

“Bunny. Are you ok? You don’t look so good. Did you throw up?” Concern is laced with his voice but is keeping an even tone to not freak you out.

A small head shake. “No daddy my tummy hurts and my head hurts.”

Chris looks at the top of your head and sees your scalp is red. He didn’t bring her hat or at the very least sunblock her scalp.

“Is she ok?” Seb asks worriedly seeing how tired you looked.

“No honestly I don’t think so. Her scalp is red and she’s thrown up.” Chris pulls you gently into the water to cool you off and get the dried on vomit wash off of you. “Is there a first aid station near here?”

“Yeah there actually is. I can get the kayaks loaded get her up there. She doesn’t look to good.”

“Daddy. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.” You say so sadly that it breaks both men’s hearts for not checking on you more.

“Bunny it is ok. It was my fault. Let’s have them look at you just to make sure you are ok.” Seb and Chris help you out of the water as Chris walks you to the first aid station.

After a few moments they walk back down and he pulls you into the water. “What did they say?” Seb asked after getting one kayak put away.

“Dehydrated with some sun poisoning. Gotta cool her down but not too quickly. Do you need any help?” Chris asked as he held you in the water.

“I really don’t want to ask for help when she’s like this but this is heavier to lift.” Seb says.

Chris pulls you over to a rock and has you sit on it as the water slowly washes over your body. He quickly helps Seb get the kayak out of the water and into the truck. He loads the rafts and the cooler while Seb gets into the water and picks you up. You nestle your head into the crook of his neck.

“Sebby.” You say tiredly.

“Yes pumpkin nose?” He replies grabbing the towel on the ledge.

“I sowwie. I didn’t mean to. Just got too hot.”

“Oh honey. Like your daddy already said. No one is mad. No need to be sorry. Do you want a snow cone or a slushy with nerds?”

A small sigh escapes you as your eyes are getting heavy again. “Blue slushy with nerds please.”

“Is she ok?” Chris asks as he walks over to pick you out of Seb’s arms and wrap you in a towel.

Seb chuckles. “Yeah she is but no snow cone but a slushy. And she used her manners.”

“Ohhh bunny you are the sweetest little princess. Let’s get you in the car for a slushy and you have your blanket also. So daddy will sit with you ok?” Chris asks as he takes the wet shirt off you and puts his oversized shirt on you with your blanket wrapped around you.

“Yes daddy sounds like a plan.” You reply as he buckles you in with his phone and blanket. You wait as Seb and him clean up and secure everything. Seb turned the car on to help cool you down some more.

By the time they got into the car to head to sonic you were fast asleep. Chris pulled the phone from your hands and unbuckled you so he could have your head laying in his lap. “So no slushy?” Seb asks looking at her sleeping form.

“Nah, we’ll grab one and put it in the freezer for her and she’ll still be happy. She’s starting to cool down so that is a plus but her arms have some bumps but she’s a fighter.”

After getting the kayaks dropped back off and the slushy Chris with Seb’s help got you and the cooler back into the house. When Chris laid you on the couch you slowly starting waking up. “Daddy.”

“Yes bunny.”

“Can I eat my slushy in the bathtub tonight?” Another small yawn and stretch. Chris and Seb looked from each other to you with a grin.

“Yeah she’ll be just fine.” Chris replied with a chuckle.

#daddy chris evans x little reader #daddy!chris evans #uncle Bucky x little reader #chris evans x black!reader

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that-one-anxious-mango · 2 years

Note

Hi!!! I love the days of our lives oneshots and how it pieces together the main puzzle!! It’s really really good and I really like your writing style! If you’re taking prompts for it can you do one where austin helps with your hair on wash day and spend time together talking about what’s been planned for the rest of the week?

Wash Day Whims

Summary: It’s wash day at the butler residence and you better believe Austin butler is involved.

Contents: Wash day Stuff! Shampoo. Product talk! Mad amounts of fluff. Little angst if you squint. Sleepy Magnus! Gooey Feelings.

Pairing: Austin Butler x Black! Reader

A/N: Hey guys! Arie here! To the person who requested this oh so long ago. Thank you so much for the love! I try my best and I really enjoy writing this series! Your words mean a lot! Also I am sorry lol I was trying to figure out the best way to write this and it accidentally started collecting dust in the drafts lol But hey we’re here now! So I hope you enjoy!

P.S I am still actively working on pushing out the drabble event things so bare with me. Comments are always encouraged as well as sending me letters with drabble and prompt ideas!

Much love! * Hugs*

_______

" The water's not too hot is it? " Austin questioned for what seemed like the hundredth time making you giggle. He was too cute sometimes.

" No Austin. The water is perfect. Thank you." You reassured reaching up to rub your man’s bare arm that was exposed due to his rolled up sleeves.

" Good. Now lean your head back for me, baby." Austin instructed softly cradling your head as you leaned your head back into the sink.

Doing as you were told you now closed your eyes and relaxed as Austin grabbed the TGIN moisture rich shampoo dropping some in his hands before going to work lathering up your hair.

You proceeded to coach him on how hard to scrub in some areas to get the gunk out and what areas he had to be especially careful with to avoid any bruises or tugging while he handled your springy coils.

All in all, it was a good experience. You loved the way he was in no rush and took his time with you. You couldn't help how ever so often you would let out the tiniest breathy moan or wiggle around a little bit at how good his hands felt on you.

They always felt good on you.

Especially in other places.

Austin couldn't lie and say he wasn't purposely scrubbing and massaging your head certain ways to provoke these sounds that was music to his ears. He enjoyed being with you like this. Taking care of you.

The intimacy of this act of service like this was what both of you loved.

He knew that his baby definitely didn’t just let anyone play in her head. So the fact that you were allowing him to do this silently told him how much you trusted him.

He loved that.

After washing twice and rinsing twice. Austin shut off the water helping slowly guide you up while wrapping a soft microfiber towel around your head, making sure to wipe any stray specks if water off your lovely face.

Once you were all the way upright, you got out of the chair grabbing your honey manuka hair mask and going over to your side of the his and hers sink.

Taking off your towel you proceeded to section your damp hair into four parts ( of course with Austin helping you straighten and clean up the parts with your rat-tail comb) You attempted to apply a even amount ( it wasn't) of the hair mask to your hair while gently detangling along the way.

Situating yourself and popping on your deep conditioning cap you set the timer for thirty minutes and decided to venture into the bedroom to find Austin lying flat on his back with a content magnus perched on his stomach listening to unreleased Elvis tracks.

Walking over you tapped his leg grabbing his attention, " Baby?"

" Yeah, Mama? " He answered turning his attention to you.

" Do you maybe wanna...maybe....i dunno....order in some Celia's and watch Ozark." You sheepishly suggested putting a innocent smile on your face and swaying back and forth.

You knew in prep for Dune there were certain things Austin wasn't allowed to eat which included the glorious taste of the flavorful birria tacos from a little family owned shop around the way.

Popping his head up quirking a eyebrow to shoot you a knowing look, you did your best to keep us this sweet seduction you had going. You reached a hand out rubbing his leg in a soft way to match the cute pout you had going.

Groaning he smirked running a hand over his face.

This woman will be the death of me...but what a beautiful way to go. He thought.

Sighing he reluctantly agreed, " Of course babe...You already know I can’t say no to that face. Grab my phone honey so I make the order." He confirmed watching you giddily jumping up and down.

Anything to see his best girl happy.

Happily handing him the phone you left to go rinse your hair as he dialed the number of the taco house.

Upon thoroughly rinsing out the mask, you applied nice amounts of Shea moisture JBCO leave in conditioner, Jojoba oil, and Mielle Hawaiian ginger hair butter. You flat twisted twelve twists into your head for the twist out you had planned for this week.

And letting his scary accurate intuition kick in, on queue to you picking up the hair oil to oil your scalp Austin's voice bellowed from the bedroom, " You got to the part where your oiling your scalp yet? "

Grinning you responded, " Yeah babe I am. I got it."

Which you didn't know why you even replied because you knew he'd whine back a , " NO! Bring it in here so I can do it please, baby." He called back.

Knowing better than to argue with your man you gathered the needed items and entered the bedroom to a already, ready Austin who had a throw pillow set up on the floor for you to sit on in-between his legs.

Not wasting anytime you plopped down handing him the oil before letting him do his thing.

You both sat in comfortable silence for a minute until a curious question popped in your head, " So what do you have planned up for this week, honey? " You inquired.

Slathering his fingertips in oil he went on to say ," Well, tommorow Monday Baz has me heading to the studio to do some vocal corrections on that's all right and hound dog so I might be late coming home depending on how late he decides to keep all of us. Then Tuesday and Wednesday are going to be press days so interviews with E!, Mojo and all them guys. Thursday I'll be having a meeting with Ian and the team about things for Dune 2 and some other offers that have come in." He listed letting his hands slip into your now clean parted head gently using his fingertips to massage your scalp while being careful not to pull or snag anything loose.

" Mmhmm. You mumbled leaning your head back, eyes shut as you soaked in the feeling you were getting. It felt so good.

Smiling at your face he continued, " And then.....on Friday I have dinner plans that more than likely will run later into the night... sweetheart. He finished.

Upon hearing his last statement you couldn't help the way your eyebrows bunched to accompany the frown that took on your face.

Dinner Plans?

On Friday?

Friday is date night.

Austin could feel your body tense up against him a little bit. He already could practically hear the wheels starting to turn in your head. So he opted to keep massaging.

At the start of your relationship you and Austin had hit some bumps in the road about time management and how often you guys were seeing each other. It was really bothering you both to not be together as consistently as you wanted to.

So you two came up with age old idea of Friday date night. A time where no matter if you guys were a whole ocean apart on facetime watching a movie together, dressing up and going to try some new restaurant, or even just staying in tangled up together while someone read to the other. Friday was your guy's night and usually nothing ever came between that.

Ever.

" Oh sounds like your super busy, babe." You whispered out wrapping your arms around yourself a bit.

He sighed noticing, " Yeah it's a jam packed week, honey. So that's why it'll all be worth getting through it to have dinner with you Friday night and then go back to my place to have some...dessert." Austin teased causing a heavy sigh to escape you as you hit him on his knee only encouraging his laughter to get louder.

" Austin don't do that! You had me thinking you had up and abandoned our date-night to have dinner with god knows who, you pointy eared elf. " You insulted never letting him forget his Shannara chronicles days.

Craning his head down laughing he assaulted your cheek and neck with kisses mumbling a " sorry." and a " You know Friday is all about me and my best girl, baby. Always." he affirmed.

And then there it was that gooey feeling that made your cheeks hurt and turned your stomach into a butterfly garden.

This man. That’s it. That’s the thought.

Reaching your hands up to cup his face and bring his lips to yours in a spiderman type kiss, you claimed his lips lovingly before pulling away and saying, " Yeah they are. And they better stay that way buddy."

#austin butler x black! reader #austin butler x reader #mangoasks #austin butler #dayofourloves #austin butler x black reader

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inkyquince · 2 years

Text

SNAKE EYES Remy x PC x Wren

This was a commission from our beloved Lurker anon! Features Monster AU!Remy and Wren, as a Naga and Trickster respectively. AFAB Reader with GN pronouns used.

content warning. blood play, kidnapping, noncon turned dubcon but the reader is having a lot of fun. Biting, oviposition, Wren is a complete dick but we love him for it. 10K words.

The sun beat down on the fields, making sweat bead on your neck and brow, the moisture dripping down and hitting the dry soil as you worked on pulling the weeds up. Your shirt stuck to your back unpleasantly and you could hear the distant sounds of the cattle, lazing about or gathered by the troughs to dunk their snouts into the water. You felt gross, dust coating your skin and the humidity of the day making everything feel swampy, as if you were on the Moors.

Just the thought of the vast expanse had you eyeing the sky, looking for the huge circling bird that had snatched you up before. Once, just the thought of seeing those huge beating wings would have struck fear into your heart, but after finding out it was somewhat harmless, lonely, you began to appreciate him. At least he was open about being what he was.

A whistle sounded and you glanced at the cottage you shared with Alex in the distance. A figure, hazy by the sweltering heat, was waving for you to come over. Your gait was slow, sore, and when you arrived at the house, Alex had already retreated back inside, into the nice cool air brought on by the cold cloths laid over the rickety fans he brought down.

“Took you long enough.” Alex said, spitting out water from where he was dunking his head in the sink, cold water running to wet his hair. He looked like one of those wet dogs that had just found the joys of a running hosepipe.

“Yeah, yeah.” You swung open the fridge to grab a cold drink, pressing the can against the back of your neck before switching it to your forehead. “What did you want?”

“What, can’t even hang out with my buddy?” Alex lifted his head from the sink, water streaming from the strands of his hair, eyes twinkling behind the darkened strands.

Alex certainly was not your first choice in employment, long hours with dismal pay, but he was the safest out of everyone else. You were sure he didn’t know exactly how safe he was in comparison.

“Just a warning, I gotta be in town overnight.” Alex continued on at your small smile, pushing his messy, wet hair back.

“What, tonight?”

“Yeah, family thing. Probably best if you also head back with me, y’know?” Alex said, his tone forced to be light and airy.

“… Why?” You stared at him.

“I…” He struggled to find his words before sighing, expression strangely stricken for the upbeat farmer. “I just think… It might not be safe, staying here all alone. Y’know? What if Remy attacks and I’m not here?”

“What if he attacks and no one is here? Think of the damage to the farm!”

“Yeah, but if you’re here all alone, you could get hurt.” Alex said firmly, small blush dusting his tanned cheeks.

You felt a bit stunned, the thought that he was more worried about you getting injured over the farm, his family legacy, being ruined and needing to be fixed up all over again. You two awkwardly let the sentence hang before you shrug.

“I don’t really want to head back to the orphanage. I’d prefer to stay here, Alex. I’ll be fine, I mean it.”

The farmer scrunched his nose and gave you a long, lingering look before sighing and shrugging as well.

“Can’t force you out. Just don’t… Don’t do anything stupid. Head to town if it gets dangerous out there.” His face filled with dismay as you didn’t respond, your stance of setting a single foot back there clear.

You hummed a vague answer and took the chance for a break inside the house, Alex heading upstairs to pack his overnight bag. You leaned against the counter, basking in the cool air. No, Alex would never understand your reluctance to return to town. He only thought it was because of the orphanage, your caretaker being a cold-blooded bastard, the wandering hands and looks, but it stopped being just that a long time ago. You had hoped he also saw what you did, but the last time you two met his adversary, it was clear he didn’t.

Glancing out the window, at the sun beaten fields, you sighed and decided to call it a day. You and Alex normally worked till dusk, sharing a meal before bed, but the heat had drained you fully. You were sweaty, dirty and you could enjoy the evening just for yourself. You had nothing against Alex, but sometimes, you needed proper privacy, which was hard, given the shared shower, the shared work and living space. Hell, the two of you shared a wall. Alex probably wanted to share far more, but you were unsure. Just one wrong comment, one confession about what fuelled the nightmares that scared you awake, and he’d give you that same look the others had. Pity, worry, maybe a bit nervous about your mental state.

No, this was better. Distance. Even if it hurts.

You had managed to take a quick shower, just in time to watch Alex head with his bag towards an idling car. You could make out his mother, waving fondly at you and you returned the gesture with a weak smile. Alex shouted a farewell as he got in and you watched the car pull out, kicking up dust clouds as it pulled out into the main road back to town.

You hoped they stayed safe. With that, you headed back inside, still wiping off the water from the shower, clothes sticking to you again but now in a refreshing way.

As you poked around for food to make, scrunching your nose at an ancient chocolate egg right at the back of the cupboard, your thoughts lingered on the town. Dread prickled the inside of your stomach. The farm felt different without Alex. Like how the hospital felt different at night. Or the entire town. The safety of his warmness was gone, and everything felt just a bit off without him. It was strange. You didn’t used to depend on him like this. The farm always felt safe, spending hours outside working, even feeling safe enough to work during the night sometimes. You were able to wander, without making sure to keep him in your peripherals, without asking him sheepishly to keep a whistle on him to alert you, which just turned into him using it to get your attention for anything.

Remembering the day your happy little bubble burst still made you shiver, and you struggled to put it out of your thoughts. It crept in the back of your mind, lurking.

You didn’t see him first. You heard him.

Not his horse. Him.

The fellow farmer made his way towards you and Alex, hat pulled low over his face to protect himself from sunburn, his kerchief pulled up over his nose. The horse spooked you, not as much as the man himself, but still. There was something dead eyed about it, like it had gotten used to a daily hell.

You didn’t know what the sound coming from him was. To this day, you were unsure. It was… Like if two pieces of leather gliding against each other. But more metallic. Something smoother. Whatever it was, it made the hair on your arms stand up as he dismounted, patting the horse briefly before turning to the two of you. Cold eyes immediately landed on you before dragging to Alex.

The farmhand was on edge, but not for the same reason you were. You had so hoped he was able to see what you could, but apparently not. You could tell from the way he raved and ranted about Remy later that night, a beer bottle threatening to spill as he gestured with it. Called him an asshole who took whatever he wanted, that underhanded prick. Which was true, but as you sat there, your stomach sank, knowing Remy was worse than Alex could ever comprehend and worst of all, you would never be able to tell him.

Bailey was the same. Telling Robin he was a monster had her agreeing, but when you insisted on it, she worriedly asked if you needed a lie down. Same with Briar. Same with Harper. Same with Leighton. No one you tried to tell took you seriously. They would laugh and agree but if you dared to go any further, they’d eye you with a newfound nervousness. The kind of look that landed you in Harper’s little playpen for a while, the doctor staring at you with hunger, murmuring about your clever little eyes. The hospital had made everything warp in your head, which was worse. You could always count on yourself, but on certain days in the chilly room, with the bare mattress uncomfortable at your back, you struggled to recall months at a time, even though your tally by your head proved that you were only in there for two weeks at that point. But could you even trust that now? It felt as if everytime you blinked, only seconds had gone by, but according to the changing scenery outside your window, it was months. Finding new marks on your body, whips lashes across your thighs, bruises dotted all over your throat, weird puncture wounds, you finally broke in that hospital.

And Harper “fixed you”. You still had months missing and felt strangely floaty, but you were released after a few more weeks. You bade him farewell with a smile but when the van dropped you off in front of the orphanage, you simply turned left, down the street and walked. You walked and walked until you hit the main road, dropping your “medication” pill by pill as you went.

So, weeks later, you still refused to take a step closer to the town, happily helping Alex in the farmlands. Safe from the monsters that looked at you hungrily, strange eyes blinking wrong and teeth glinting in the light. All for naught now. You had a home finally, and Remy threatened the safety of it. So, as you stared at your dinner you made, picking at it, you resolved to go back over there, despite the last time you did, you swore to never step foot on the estate again.

The estate had scared you. Playing card games with Wren did nothing to stop the feeling that eyes were on you, the walls, the windows, even the cards felt like they were watching your every move, ready for you to fail. The fires did deter the sabotage attempts for a few days but unless you did something extreme, this hellish ouroboros situation would continue. Unless…

Unless the fire spread to the actual estate, not just the fields. Remy’s hideout would be gone and he’d need to leave, or rebuild.

Sweat prickled at your palms and you felt sick, a chill settling over you. Maybe Doctor Harper was right, and you had finally gone crazy. Seriously considering arson? Just because a man made you uneasy?

You stood, feeling queasy. Tucking the dinner back into the fridge, you stood and went upstairs, each creak of the wood making the hair on your arms stand up. The paranoia was now so great, you felt as if the panelling of the walls had warped as you ascended, the wood patterns forming into insidious eyes, staring at your every move.

“Pull yourself together, idiot.” You muttered to yourself, palms itching and sweating despite your whispers to yourself.

Yes, do.

You paused on the landing, carpet struggling to muffle the creak of the wood. The whisper had come and gone, tickling the shell of your ear. You knew the windows could never close all the way, because of how old and rickety they were, so the whistling of the wind never quietened, not once, but… This wasn’t that. It was soft, warm, as if teasing you.

“Alex? Did you forget something?” You shakily called out, knowing it was futile.

There was no sheepish shout back, Alex tripping over himself in embarrassment to grab something he forgot, his ears blushing red. Just the quiet whistling of the wind against the windows, the cattle outside, and your own thudding heart.

A few months earlier, you would have blamed the medication, even deluded yourself into believing it was the wind, or just a stray thought of your own. But not now. All that remained of your self doubt had been long since crushed into the tarmac of the road, chalky residue no one would ever look twice at.

… Maybe setting fire to the estate was a solid idea after all.

Feeling the sanest you have in a long while, you continued into your room, tugging on the clothes you reserved for the nights Remy’s men would prowl the tree line, the smell of smoke never leaving the fabric now matter how many times you washed them. A creeping, gleeful mania curled in your stomach, the adrenaline surpassing your initial doubt.

The gasoline was easy to find. Alex used to burn the foliage from when the two of you were clearing the fields, it was just easier to get rid of it that way. The two containers were still about half way filled, the liquid making a low bassy noise as it swished inside.

The hike to the estate wasn’t pretty. Dragging the two containers the distance was a sticky job, the weight having made your fingers go numb by the time you got halfway. Sweat crept down your nape, making your dark clothes stick to your skin. Walking in the dark meant you stumbled a lot, twisting your ankle or nearly falling off the overgrown path sometimes. You had stuck your lighter in your pocket and you were tempted to take it out just to light your way, but you neither wanted to stick a flaming lighter between your teeth to light your way, probably setting your nose on fire, or have an open flame near the two canisters, paranoia whispering that the dripping you could hear was from the plastic eroding. It meant that not only your shoes were stained with the liquid, but the trail might light up the entire path back to the farm. You had to keep shaking the thought off, needing to just get to the estate before dealing with anything else.

Before too long, the estate loomed ahead, with a few lights still on, with lanterns bobbing in the distance around the enclosed paddock.You stopped walking as you reached the crest of the hill just beside the estate and you took a moment to survey the manor. A shiver ran up your spine at the sight of it. The sight of the big house always made you feel slightly nauseous. Or maybe it was your empathy for the people brainwashed into their current predicament, the taste of grass tinging your tongue as you watched them be herded back into the barn.

Setting the two canisters down on the damp dirt, you patted your pockets for the lighter. Empty. You froze up, hands shaking against your filthy jeans before desperately turning out your pockets, wildly checking all pockets, even the nonfunctional ones sewed shut.

“Shit.” You whispered, the beads of sweat trailing against your temples now ice cold against your skin.

You dropped to your knees, patting the ground around you, hoping it only recently fell out of your pocket, desperately wishing to feel the metal casing among the rotting leaves and dead grass. Blinded by panic, your movements grew wilder, raking your fingers through the dirt, whispering profanities to yourself.

Suddenly, while grasping at the dirt, you reached too far and smacked the canister with the back of your hand, making it wobble precariously on the mound of dirt.

“Shit, no!”

You lunged forward, hoping to grab it before it upended, but in your panic, you leaned too far, losing your balance, the muck shifting. Both you and the container toppled, the dirt giving away and sending you both skidding down the hill. The fall was steep and the ground too wet to use your palms to slow your descent. Twigs and loose branches of the shrubs and trees scratched your face, loose pebbles scratching your fingers as you scrabbled at them. Luckily, despite all the forest debris, the soft ground meant you didn’t break anything when you finally rolled to a stop at the bottom. The canister wasn’t so lucky, leaking out from where it had impacted a rock, the heady fumes gathering in the air quickly.

You spat out whatever dirt got into your mouth and shakily glanced back up, where the other container still stood, unbothered by the tumble that its two companions just took. With a grumble you patted your legs and arms, making sure the worst injury you had were just bruises and a few scrapes. Your spine felt tender, with your fingers scruffed and cut up. You could feel something oozing down your temple, no longer ice cold sweat, but something hot and sticky. Shakily you raised your hand to touch the liquid-

“Nuh uh.”

A voice startled you and you jerked to look over your shoulder only for a black baton swinging down on you to be the last thing you saw before it knocked you unconscious.

—

Your mouth tasted like cotton balls was your first thought. Your tongue felt dry, and wearily rubbing your lips together did nothing to make the taste dissipate.

You always felt… Cold.

Your eyes shot open, the familiar feeling of the chilling wind against your bare body reminiscent of waking up at the farm house with your bedsheets on the floor, nights at the brothel, even the asylum. You scrambled upright, yanking your legs up to cover your bare torso but metal cuffs bit into your feet.

Disconcerted, you sat up, blinking at the restraints around your ankles, connected to a metal loop cemented into the floor. You yanked at the chain weakly before giving up when it reopened the deeper scratches on your fingers. Looking around, you were… In a pen… A cattle pen…

“Fuck.” You whispered.

A loud smack against your pen walls made you freeze up, the farmhand giving you an ugly look at your swearing as she patrolled. She walked past after a moment, revealing the rest of the barn to you, to the people moseying about on their hands and knees, just as naked as you. Dread pooled in your stomach as you watched them, doe eyed and mooing at each other softly, some napping as others blinked at the patrolling farmhands, cocks and tits leaking milk as they pressed themselves against the wood.

Trying to get their attention did nothing, just had them blink and smile at you. Talking was also out. When you weren’t being shouted at for it by the farmhands, with the butts of their prongs smacked against your enclosure door, you only either got dumb or nervous looks. You eventually gave up and tried to get comfortable, despite the clunky restraints around your ankles making it hard to move.

Hours later, as dawn slowly crept into the barn, farmhands began letting the cattle out, urging them along by nudging them with their dirty boots if they were too drowsy to move. Fear built as they got closer and closer to you. This is how it starts. Being forced into the paddock, only being able to eat grass, sprouting a tail and cow ears and being.. .Being used. You tried to scramble away as they paused at your door, but couldn’t move an inch. The farmhand leered at your naked body but didn’t come in to let you out with the rest of the cattle, instead moving on. You weren’t… Going to…

You were left alone in the barn as everyone else was cleared out. The silence was intolerable, making you wish for the moos and sighs back instead of the monotonous nothing.

No one came back in the barn, even to check on you. The cows were herded in and out, but you were left alone for days. Farmhands would spray you with a hosepipe to make sure you never got too filthy, refreshing your bucket of oats they dumped into your pen on the first night. You almost wished that they were going to turn you, just to not have to keep staring at these four walls. Was this how they made the cattle so obedient? Isolate them until they begged to go outside, crawl around and eat grass? As you struggled chewing on the oats, the food clumping together in your mouth, you wondered if Alex was back yet. Was he worried? Or did he think you had left him of your own accord? Or did something make him forget you. Alex wouldn’t abandon you, would he?

With that thought churning just as unpleasantly as the oats in your belly, you lay down to sleep for another night. You struggled to fall any deeper into unconsciousness than a light doze, your eyes opening for a few seconds during the night but not waking up entirely. Your half asleep brain saw strange people gathering, looking at the cows in their pens. Whispering softly so as not to wake anyone. As you drifted back under, one of the farm hands, one you never saw before leaned against the walls of your enclosure, brilliant white teeth glinting in the low lamp light as low sounds of a tussle erupted behind him.

The sun wasn’t what woke you this morning. Nor was it the birds usual singing, now silent. It was the heartbroken moos, the pained noises coming from the pens surrounding you. That and the overwhelming smell of copper, blanketing the entire barn in its stench.

It was hard to see, even using your arms to drag yourself forward on your belly to look out from the gaps in your gate. Farmhands paced and smacked rowdier members of the cattle but didn’t let anyone out. The noises quietened eventually, just choked noises of distress piquing up every now and then. Once it was all quiet, the others, as per, were let out into the fields. That’s when you could see.

The pen a little way down from your on the opposite side, usually home to a particularly beefy person, was empty. Puddles of dried blood pooled on the floor leading out, sticking dirt and straw together, footprints stamped into the muck. Your stomach flipped unpleasantly and you rolled onto your back, staring at the roof. Squeezing your eyes shut did nothing, the darkness of your eyelids projecting the scene more vibrantly than you could bear. Even as the farmhands returned, muttering and throwing pails of water to dissolve the dried mess, the realisation that the bloodied sight had brought on couldn’t be as easily washed away, trickling into the sewer grate built into the cement of the floor.

How could you have been so stupid. These cows weren’t fed and bred for milk. They were food.

And an insistent part of you wouldn’t stay quiet, nagging at you that what they were feeding was not the people of the town.

“Why the frown, sunshine?” A chuckle jerked you out of your horrified trance, loosening the grip your thoughts had on you.

You opened your eyes and blinked at the person leaning over the walls of your enclosure. Wren… Wren?

“Wren!” You sat upright, suddenly aware of your nudity, caring for the first time in days.

“Hey, sweet thing.” The smuggler rolled a cigarette between his fingers, twinkling eyes never leaving your flushed face. “Fancy meeting you here.”

Your initial elation at the sight of him faded just as quickly as it came and your smile dropped.

“Wren, please, help get me out, they’re going to kill me!” Your voice came out high and panicky and you quickly glanced around him, only for the cleaning farmhands to be gone altogether.

He blinked at you, a strange amused smile pulling at his lips. Tucking the cigarette into the curve of his bottom lip, he pulled out a lighter from his pocket, flicked it a few times before lighting it. The battered casing looked… Familiar-

“I would if I could.” Wren shrugged, snapping the lighter back shut and exhaling smoke slowly. “But doll, my employer ain’t so nuts about your lil arson antics.”

You gaped at him before gritting your teeth and jutting your chin out in defiance.

“Which ones? I feel like that bastard would love to know about the ones you helped with.” You said angrily.

The smuggler just looked at you, eyes twinkling with mirth, turning over the lighter with his fingers steadily.

“Got me there, I guess.” He finally shrugged, straightening up. “Tell you what… We play a round, I win, you stay, you win, I get you out of the barn.”

“Wren!” You struggled not to let his name escape in a panicked shout. “This is my life on the line!”

“So you don’t wanna play? Fine by me. Gonna miss ya, sweetheart.” Wren exhaled and turned away.

“Wait! Okay, okay! Fine, get the stupid cards out.”

The smuggler grinned around his cigarette before turning back towards you, gleefully hopping over the gate into your pen. Sinking down onto the floor with his legs crossed, he routed around in his pockets, tossing out random sweets, the lighter, your underwear from the last time you played Blackjack with him, a weird broken off fang before yanking out a dirty drawstring pouch. Wren upturned it and shook, four dice clattering out and onto the floor. You had never seen him play with these before. They looked to be made out of wood but you couldn’t be sure.

“No cards this time.” Wren tossed the pouch over his shoulder without a care, instead scooping the dice into his palm. “We’re gonna play one round of dice. Less hassle, y’know?”

“Wait, no, I don’t know how to play!”

“Then just roll the dice.” Wren set two of them down in front of you and rubbed his own against his shirt.

You didn’t pick them up, shifting nervously. Dread pricked your skin, the downy hair of your arms standing straight up in the chilled air of the barn. You always regarded Wren as someone who would be on your side, having helped you numerous times before, as long as you made it fun. So you shouldn’t be as surprised as you are now really. But Wren never actually left you in certain danger like he was willing to do right now. Stupid of you to expect anything different, you guessed.

“What, don’t trust me?” Wren grinned, as if able to read your emotions easily. “I like you, darlin’. Believe me, I’ll tell ya if you win.”

His grin and your gut objected to that sentiment. Nevertheless, you picked up the dice.

Wren winked at you before rolling the pair in cupped in his palm, the quiet clicking filling the barn, louder than they ever should be. The smuggler finally dropped them straight from his palm, letting them bounce on the ground. Their little faces stared up at you. A seven and a nine. That was… A good score, presumably?

He nodded to himself, before nudging you with his boot.

“Shake that money maker.”

You stared at him.

“Your hand, sweetheart. Word gets around, y’know.” Wren grinned.

“Shut up.” You muttered and weakly rolled the dice in your palm, the sound far more subdued that it had been for him. Sweat gathered in your palm, too aware that your life hung in the balance.

You quickly turned over your hand to let them fall, just like Wren did. The damp of your palm made one stick to your skin a moment longer before gravity freed it anyway. They hit the ground like a rock.

Two ones. Snake eyes.

You didn’t know much about dice, but you never heard that phrase used in a positive light. The two black dots stared at you and you shut your eyes, stomach twisting. Wren gave a low whistle that ended with a soft laugh.

“Time to collect your earnings, I guess.”

“Huh?” You opened your eyes, staring at him.

“Ya won.” Wren got to his feet, tucking his little treasures back into his pockets, patting at them before turning his gaze back to you. “So, let’s scoot.”

“What?” You didn’t dare believe him.

“Me. You. Leaving. Maybe getting a milkshake.”

Still stunned, you didn’t move as the smuggler leaned over the gate and pawed at something on the opposite side of your pen walls before pulling back to reveal a large ring of keys. The bastards had kept your salvation on the other side of your enclosure! Stupidly close if you hadn’t been chained down by your feet. Wren deftly unlocked the cuffs around your ankles and grasped your forearms, pulling you up onto your feet.

You sway slightly, unused to standing up after so many days being forced to sit on the floor. As you get your balance again, the pins and needles slowly fading, Wren shrugged off his coat and draped it over your shoulders, the bottom ending around your thighs. You tugged it closer around you and you shot him a grateful smile.

“Time to scoot.” Wren returned the gesture, slipping his gloved hand into yours and opening the gate with one of the keys.

He led you through the barn, gingerly stepping over the watered down blood stains and through the large doors leading out. You hadn’t realised how much time had passed from when the cattle was first let out, a gentle twilight setting over the estate. Farmhands were too focused on the cows milling about to give you and Wren any attention, as the two of you snuck away, his hand never leaving yours.

You froze up as he neared the manor, instead of heading out through the trees surrounding the property. Wren glanced back at you, just a few steps away from the double doors leading in.

“Why-”

“Sweetheart, they’re gonna comb the area when they realise you’re missing. Which imbecile would escape through the house, huh?” Wren tugged on your hand before you finally trotted after him again, the window blowing the coat up around your thighs.

The inside of the manor wasn’t any warmer than the outside. The ceiling lights were strange, nearly baking you with heat as you passed underneath them, with everywhere else tinged with cold. Wren didn’t seem to notice the change of temperature everytime you passed one, heading from the backdoors, through a coat room, down a hallway before arriving at what must be the ostentatious front doors, looming tall above the two of you.

“Wren… I… I cannot thank you enough.” You squeezed his hand, your other reaching out to rest on the frigid metal handles.

“Hey…” Wren’s voice was quiet, strangely sincere. “You didn’t think I would leave you back there, did you?”

Your cheeks flushed and you stared at the floor, guilt churning in your chest.

“Look at me, baby.” His finger tilted your chin up, up until your eyes met his, warm brown and…

You couldn’t move.

Not even a flick of your finger. Frozen in place as Wren gazed directly into your eyes.

“I wasn’t gonna leave ya out there.” His lips curved into a grin, sharper than the ones you expected from him. “Not when it's comfier inside.”

… Oh.

Wren was one of them.

“Now.” The smuggler sighed, letting go of your chin and dropping his hands to your waist. “It’s been too long since you gave me some lovin’, huh?”

His eyes swirled like a kaleidoscope as he leaned in, pressing his lips to your ear.

“Been dyin’ to fuck you on Mister Remy’s bed for ages.”

Wren guided your frozen hand to his crotch, erection tented against his trousers.

“Feel that? So cruel to leave me with blue balls for so long.”

Using the hand he was still holding, he began to guide you towards the staircase, humming as the lamps began to sway by themselves. You stumbled over the carpeted stairs, feeling like a puppet being yanked about by a puppeteer as you both headed to the landing. Wren kept looking over his shoulder at you, shooting you a greedy smirk as he led you along, only stopping at an ornate door.

“Don’t mind the mess. He’s pissy.” He shrugged before turning the handle.

Wren let the door slowly shiver open, revealing a nearly pitch black room. Warmth hit you all at once, relaxing your shoulders as the smuggler glanced around before tugging you inside. You almost tripped over something heavy at your foot, scrambling to get your footing. He just snickered and yanked you deeper in. You hadn’t been able to see, but there was something taking up the entirety of the flooring. Cool, and slippery. Your lack of balance wasn’t aided by Wren easily climbing over the obstacles, pulling you towards the king sized bed with rumpled sheets. Your feet kept slipping over the cold, dry surfaces.

Finally you were pushed onto the bed, bouncing a bit. You felt something crinkle underneath you, cracking like crinkled paper.

“Whoopsie. He didn’t clean up after himself.” Wren scrunched his nose before rolling you on your side, yanking the material out from under you before letting you rest back on your back.

Your eyes flicked to…

He…

Wren was holding up a huge piece of shedded snake skin. Opaque, almost parchment like in appearance, and double your width. Your breath quickened in panic. You didn’t know what any of the people in town actually were, just that they were… Wrong. But you… Never expected… Something like… Like…

“This,” Wren sighed. “This is why I told him not to fire the maids.”

He tossed the limp skin to the side, wiping his broad hands on his thighs as if to get rid of the feeling. His smile returned as he gazed down at you, drifting a finger over your cheek before dropping to the coat you still had on.

“As cute as you are in my stuff… I’ve missed those tits.” Wren gripped the shoulders of the garment and yanked it straight off, revealing your bare body to the room. “Anyway, Remy really didn’t believe me when I said you had the cutest cunt I’d ever seen.”

You were fighting to get feeling back in your body as panic gripped your heart. Nothing was making sense, not the snake skin, not the way he was talking, both about Remy, nor about when he claimed to have seen you entirely naked. You never slept with him, you knew that, only once did you hand over your underwear during a game, but hid your cunt with your shirt until you won. Wren patted your cheek again, blind to your turmoil. before unzipping his trousers and fishing his erect cock out of his scuffed jeans, the tip already leaking thickly. Precum droplets hit your bare thighs as he fiddled with his shirt, tossing the fabric to the side to reveal his bare chest. You exhaled shakily, catching Wren’s attention, cock bobbing with his movements. His eyes dragged over your body appreciatively before humming softly.

“Sorry, darling, forgot.” He tilted his head and snapped his fingers. “I know you’re a fantastic fuck and I really ain’t in the mood to ruin you on my cock while you lie there like a mannequin.”

You could move again! You swung your leg upwards to kick Wren in the cock and make your escape when…

Your leg swung up, over his hips, pulling him closer.

“Eager.” You were nose to nose with the smuggler, his cool breath tickling your skin.

His cock throbbed against your bare cunt, still dribbling pre-cum, almost at an inhuman rate.

You wanted to hit him, smack him, scream at him for doing this to you, but your movements weren’t your own. You wound your arms around his neck, whining softly as he idly rutted against your lips, leaning down to press his lips against yours with a sigh.

His cockhead rutting against your clit had you rocking against him, anger draining far too soon, only to be replaced with the hazy lust you knew too well from losing blackjack nights and once in a blue moon at the brothel.

Despite the two of you just sloppily grinding against each other, you felt your orgasm building far, far too soon. Whatever Wren had done to you had your brain fuzzy, your body overly sensitive to his touches.

“God, missed this hole.” Wren broke away to admire your cunt, running his thumb over your clit before spitting on your opening.

You just bucked your hips and sighed happily, your fingers gripping his belt loops to drag him in closer again. The smuggler slowly pressed into you, his cockhead making more than enough lube to slip into you with ease. You arched your back, feeling his erection throb inside of you, tightening your legs around his hips.

“Fuck.” Wren sighed as he bottomed out inside of you, cockhead dragging against your walls.

Instead of laying back on top of you, caging you between his arms, he gripped your hips as he fell back into a seated position, dragging you up onto his lap.

“I always liked you best like this, all naked on my lap.”

Your arms tightened around his neck as his cock nudged deeper inside you than before, pleasure thrumming through your body. Sloppily rocking on his dick, your eyes struggled to focus on any one thing in the room. All that existed was Wren’s soft hair trapped under your arms, his hungrily thrusts upwards, into you, his bare skin against yours as his chest hair lightly tickled you.

You would have been utterly lost in the pleasure if something moving out the corner of your eye grabbed your attention. Moan cut off, you looked to your right, eyes adjusting to the dark.

The strange mound covering the floor shifted as you fought to figure out what the shadows in the room really were. Wren continued to moan as he enjoyed your cunt, fingers digging into your ass, his magic struggling to pull you back into the blanket of pleasure he had you in.

“W-Wren.” You gasped out, and the mound shifted again.

… Fuck. The strange heap wasn’t.. It…

A snake tail. Long, thick, and winding through the entirety of the room, you had climbed over it with Wren to get to the bed. The bed with… The shedded snake skin.

“Wren!” You whimpered and the smuggler paused in his thrusts, settling into just rocking you on his cock.

“Don’t be so scared, buttercup. He likes to watch.” Wren sucked a love mark into your shoulder with a sigh.

Your heart thudded in your chest as your eyes followed the glossy black and green iridescent scales, growing thicker and thicker until they stopped at someone’s hips. Tanned with a prominent v-line. A taut stomach, a broad chest, strong shoulders…

Remy gazed at you from where he relaxed in his own coils. A small smirk played on his lips as he watched your eyes widen in horror and try to pull away from Wren’s embrace. The smuggler gently shushed your noises of terror as you tried to scramble away to no avail, his strong arms refusing to let go of you.

“Skittish little thing.” Remy finally spoke, cold eyes never leaving yours. “You were so fearless the last time you were here.”

He… He knew you were the one who set the fires? How-

“He ain’t talkin’ about that, sweetheart.” Wren murmured against your ear. “Remy talking about when the good doctor handed you over. Thought your therapy would improve if you had nothing on the mind but grass and cock. To be fair, it looked like it worked.”

Panic forced all the breath from your lungs as you became utterly light headed.

Therapy… Harper.. Handed over..? Your missing memories, were you here? The whip marks, the taste of grass on your tongue that you thought was empathy? How-

Wren started up his brutal pace again, bouncing you on his cock with gusto. Remy shifted in his coils, finally coming closer, the entire room fluctuating all at once as his coils tightened with his movements.

“God, you were cute.” Wren sighed, relaxing from his upright position, instead laying on his back, grabbing at your shins to make sure to keep you rocking on his leaking cock, pre-cum dribbling out of you and over his stomach. “You loved it when I grabbed your horns and held you down to fuck you. Those cute brain dead moo’s, god, Remy was so pissed he couldn’t fuck you, weren’t you?”

Remy finally was close enough to the bed, gripping the sheets by Wren’s head as his eyes trained on your cunt greedily swallowing his cock with every thrust. He just scowled at his mate’s teasing and leaned over, brushing his sharpened nails over your pubic area.

“Believe me,” Remy murmured, frigid eyes meeting yours once more. “I'd have ruined you worse than Wren ever could.”

Wren chuckled and raised his head to press a kiss to Remy’s jaw. You helplessly scrabbled at the smuggler’s stomach as your pussy was ruthlessly fucked, fear and pleasure warping togther and making you dizzy.

“Restraint, babe.” Wren sighed, one of his hands drifted up to squeeze your breast. “You wouldn’t have let them waddle back like that. Not with all those eggs you’ve been saving for them.”

You froze up, nails digging into the blond’s stomach in horror, as he arched his back and swore.

“Fuck, they got tighter. Like that thought, sweetheart? Being our lil breeding bitch? You get to carry his eggs, babe, ain’t that nice?” Wren panted as Remy stared at the ring of cream around the base of his partner’s cock.

“N-no, please, d-don’t, I can’t-.” You were cut off by Remy’s low hiss before he lunged at you, pinning your shoulders down against the bed, sharp fangs inches from your vulnerable throat.

Before you could try to pull away from him, his dripping fangs bit into your throat, hot tongue pressed against the sensitive skin. Wren chuckled as he sat up, still hard cock dragging out from your poor sensitive, puffy cunt. Your initial terror ebbed away as you felt something cold spread through your veins, Remy’s venom rushing into your body.

Your fear faded completely and the naga released his grip on you, fangs sliding out from your punctured skin, blood dotting his lips. The throb between your legs worsened dramatically, your hips bucking instinctively. Your skin felt too sensitive for the humid air of the room, your cunt too empty, your brain too filled with cotton to function.

“Please…” You whimpered. “Please… It hurts.”

You began to paw at your pussy, raising your hips for anyone, anything to fill you up, to rip you with a fat cock. Wren’s eyes fixed upon your hole, leaking slick and precum and he reached out to finger you before Remy smacked his hand away, still scowling at you.

“So, now you need something in your stupid cunt? When you so rudely refused my eggs, my offspring, my protection?”

“I’m sorry.” You began to cry, bucking your hips weakly. Honestly, he was right. You felt so empty, so horribly empty, and you knew his clutch would give you nothing but pleasure. You could already feel them, the way his eggs would shift inside you, like a phantom pregnancy already taking root inside of you. You’d be nothing but blissful if he let you carry his heirs.

“Are you? Really?” Remy sneered, settling onto his side next to you, face so close to yours, you could press a desperate kiss to his lips if you found the strength.

“Yes, yes, please, yes!” You pressed closer to him, fingers weakly pawing at his taut stomach.

“C’mon, Rems. They’re about to start drooling as hungrily as their cunt.” Wren sighed, sliding two fingers down over your swollen clit to your hole, making you jerk your hips and cry out.

Remy stared into your eyes before quickly flicking towards your pussy, Wren playing with your clit cruelly. Enraptured with the sight, his resolve began to weaken before he furrowed his brows, still deeply insulted. You had no choice.

“Please.” You whispered, hand drifting down, clumsily pawing at where his pubic area ended and his scales began, hoping against hope that you were touching him in a way he liked. “I want you to fill me up. ‘M gonna be so good for you, please, Remy.”

That did it. He stiffened up like a board before swearing under his breath, his coils tightening against each other.

Before he could say anything, Wren gripped your hips and yanked you down, to just below Remy’s hips, with the smuggler lying beside you, facing the shimmering scales.

“Watch this, darling.” He murmured into your ear and ran the same two fingers he used on your earlier down Remy’s stomach, over his hips, to directly below his pubic bone, where the scales began.

His slick covered fingers traced over the same area, where the scales warped weirdly as Remy flushed above the two of you, beginning to roll his hips. Wren put a bit more pressure on his final stroke, dipping his coarse fingers into a slit you only noticed now. The rancher groaned deeply, the end of his tail slithering onto the bed and wrapping around your wrist, tightening and loosening as Wren continued. You stroked the cool scales but kept your eyes trained on his slit relaxing, fleshy pink insides widening as the smuggler pushed another finger in.

“He fucking loves this.” Wren sighed, low and conspiratorial. “Loves his slit being touched, even when he fusses that he doesn’t.”

He used his other hand to grab your free wrist, resting it on his throbbing cock, still spilling out precum. Whatever Wren really was, he was no doubt a creature of pleasure, some sort of messy breeder.

“I even fucked his slit.” He grinned against your ear, rolling his hips against your grip. “I recommend tongue fucking it, but that’s for later.”

You stared as Wren finally withdrew his fingers, followed immediately by two, large fleshy cocks, springing free, dripping transparent liquid from their tips. You shivered against the smuggler, cunt immediately aching more as you gazed at them. As if feeling your hungry gaze, they dribbled more liquid out, twitching. You felt drool pool under your tongue, the venom making its way around your body causing everything but the thought of getting one, no, both of Remy’s fat cock into you. Even Wren went quiet, only to lean in and take the tip of one into his mouth, sighing as he tasted the dribbling slick. Pawing at Wren, you nudged him to the side to be able to reach over as well, running the tip of your tongue from the base to the tip of his dick. It throbbed under your tongue, tasting… Tasting of nothing you’ve ever had before, but it made your head fuzzier, heavier.

Remy groaned as the two of you tasted him, both mouthing as sucking at his sensitive cock, fighting back a primal urge to force you both all the way down, to the base. He felt something deeper inside of him shift, eggs beginning to tremble, trying to press into the tight, heady warmth sucking at him.

“Stop.” He finally snapped, stomach twisting at the thought of a single member of his clutch going to waste. For god’s sake, he waited all this time because he refused to send you back to the asylum while carrying his eggs, knowing that Harper loved his parasites and would be nothing but gleeful to have naga eggs. He wasn’t going to ruin breeding you full now because you and Wren slobbering over his dicks.

Speaking of, his little mates reluctantly pulled off his cocks, slick dripping from your lips. With a sigh, Wren sat up, scooting behind you to grip your waist.

“Now, darlin’, you’re gonna want my help with this bit.”

Remy dragged himself to the centre of the bed, cocks bobbing with the movement as Wren hauled you upright, making you straddle his waist, where his partner’s human skin met his scales. Wren tried to distract you by cooing at you, kissing down the nape of your neck as he lifted you, cunt barely brushing the tips of the naga’s dual dicks.

Your cunt throbbed with need, brain too fuzzy to realise you were going to be forced to take both of his cocks, too vacant to ever wonder if it would hurt. Wren glanced at Remy over your shoulder, and when the naga nodded, he began to slowly push you down as the other man gripped the base of both of his cocks so they would for sure press into you. You gave a shaky squeak as the tips pressed together into you, stretching you already, as if the prep Wren gave you earlier meant nothing.

Wren felt you stiffen up and tutted softly, wrapping his arms more securely around you so you couldn’t squirm out of his hold. His pressure around your body increased, his movement less like lightly trying to push you, more like wrestling you down onto two throbbing cocks. You gasped, twitching and arching your back as they pressed deeper into you, somehow expanding even more now that they were inside of your body. Remy, meanwhile, jerking his hips upwards to bully your cunt with his dicks, your hole struggling to take them.

With a final stuttering whine, you sank to the base, his scales cool against your poor puffy pussy. The naga immediately gave an experimental thrust into you, his cocks seemingly expanding far more now that they were into you. You squeak turned into a loud moan, his scales nudging your clit just right as your walls squeezed around him.

“Look at you.” Wren sighed, his hold around you loosening and his hands dropping to your lower stomach, swollen from how stuffed your cunt was. He gave an experimental squeeze and both you and Remy moaned, bucking against each other.

The smuggler chuckled and started moving your hips for you, you already too fucked out to move by yourself, weakly rocking and bouncing while feeling far too full to even think. Remy gripped the sheets as you rolled your hips, his tail tightening around your wrist until you could feel your bones creak under his strength. The naga eyed Wren as he pressed kisses to your temple, dragging his tongue over the shell of your ear, a greedy hand groping your chest. Something curled in his stomach and with an annoyed hiss, Remy gripped your wrists and yanked you away from the smuggler, making you lie against his chest, the predatory part of his brain taking over as he felt his eggs slowly shift along, making their way through his cocks. You shivered at the sudden shift in position, trying to arch your back as you felt the first load of eggs squeeze past your entrance, travelling into you as Remy began to push his clutch into you. With every egg pushing into you, your orgasm quickly had you shaking and whimpering. Something about the venom had fried your nerves, so when an egg squeezed into you, just one touch had you cumming over and over again and they way your body stiffened with every new one didn’t help.

Wren didn’t seem to mean that you were ripped from his arms, lips quirking in amusement. He seemed to understand Remy’s reptile brain needed its egg carrier to be marked by him, and only him. Instead, he shifted his weight, lying on his stomach to mouth at the base of his partner’s cock as eggs briefly expanded the flesh before pushing into you. Wren greedily lapped at your slick coating the twin cocks, indulging in the moans and whines coming from the both of you.

Meanwhile, your neck and throat were no safer from Remy’s fangs than it had been from Wren’s wandering nips. In fact, the naga couldn’t help but bite into you hungrily, losing himself as your blood dribbled from the puncture wounds only to be lapped at by his split tongue. You were soon completely filled with cum and eggs, shoulders and throat marked up completely.

Weak and overstimulated, you finally went completely limp against Remy’s chest.

Before you knew it, your eyes closed and you were lost in sleep, despite the pair of hands trailing over your body, lifting your abused cunt so that Remy’s cocks could slip out, thick globs of cum dribbling out of you.

When you awoke, it was not yet light outside. You… Guessed? It felt painful to open your eyes, eyes flicking to the curtains slightly parted with no sunshine streaming in.

Sitting up, you froze, feeling the eggs gently shift inside of you, snug and secure. You gave a whimper, torn between feeling horrified and aroused. To your side, Remy still slept, the pink tips of his cocks still peeking out from his slit, the human part of his body snug on the bed while his hellishly large and long snake tail hung over the bottom of the bed, still completely filling up the room. At least the tip of his tail had unwrapped from your wrist, now gently flicking against your stomach. You gently lifted it and placed it by Remy’s own hand.

Wren, of course, nowhere to be seen.

Now was your chance. Maybe get back to Alex, get back to town, get… Get… Get these things out of you…

The thought twisted your swollen stomach, a sour taste settling on your tongue. Still, you had to go, now or never.

Nervously but carefully, you slide off the bed, toes trying to find any gaps in between the naga’s coils to touch the floor and not disturb him. Impossible. He was huge, covering every inch. You bit your lip and exhaled slowly. Fuck it. You quickly squirmed across the huge mounds of cold, dry scales, trying not to slip under the muscle. It was weirdly fun, reminding you of a ball pit they had at your school when you were way younger, except… Well, this was… This.

You managed to wriggle over to the door, clutching your stomach protectively. You glanced at the bed, but Remy hadn’t moved, still snoozing with the end of his tail curled around his own pinkie now.

You fled through the door.

—-

It was honestly unfair how fast people always realised you were gone.

You were barely a few steps into the forest, huddled in a coat you snatched out of a closet by the entrance, when a whistle blew, shrill and loud enough to reach your ears easily. You weren’t naive. You knew without a doubt, that was for you.

You sped through the underbrush, your feet stinging from the cold and the stones, too afraid to be caught than to worry about any superficial scratches you would get. Near tears, you scanned around for a place to hide, feeling far too heavy from all the eggs and not wanting to hurt them. You slapped your own cheek in frustration at the thought and just as hot tears began to spill over your cheeks, you saw it. A little outcropping, hidden by jagged rocks and covered by a fallen tree. It wasn’t even a proper chance, but you hoped against hope that they would miss you if you hid there.

You scrabbled to squish into your hiding place, covering your stomach with your arms as you crouched, shivering. A few minutes passed and the sounds of dogs and shouts of the farmhands grew closer before growing far more distant. You waited a few more seconds before sighing in relief.

“Stupid thing, aren’t you?” An angry voice hissed above you.

Before you could even blink, you were yanked up by the coat’s hood, dangling helpless above the ground before being slammed against a tree, far off the ground. Your fingers scrabbled helpless against the tree bark before gripping the sturdy branches.

Remy stared at you with fury, fangs dripping venom as he bared them at you.

“You little bitch. Here we thought you had learned your place. Apparently not.”

You gave a squeak of terror as Remy crowded you against the tree, still bare chested. You felt a familiar feeling of his cocks squirming to crowd into your sore hole and you wildly kicked your legs to no avail, helplessly flailing at the air so far above the ground.

“You think I’d let my stupid breeding bitch get away? No, I’d rather stick a blue ribbon around your throat and let me men fuck you like the prized dog you are. You’re lucky you’re carrying my clutch.”

The blood rushing to your ears deafened you to Remy’s words as his cocks wound themselves back inside of you, filling you up once more. Your cunt ached, but as if it had missed the weight of him inside of you. You began to moan once more as the naga roughly pumped his hips, snarling and hissing as you began to cling to him once more.

“Is this what I must do? Keep you full of cock at all times of the day so at least your whore hole recognises who you belong to. Fuck you until you realise it too.” Remy bit down on your neck once more, this time not releasing your venom, knowing that you already craved what only he and Wren could give you now.

Remy toyed with the idea of letting you stumble back to your farm boy. Round with his offspring and unable to take his pathetic cock anymore. He knew from the moment he saw you again, standing there with the red head, you two must be intimate. How could you not be, when you were such a fine thing, perfect and bound to make anyone go crazy with lust.

You, meanwhile, stiffened up, the familiar feeling of an egg pushing through from the base of Remy’s cock, into you before being released with the rest of the clutch. The naga gave a slow sigh.

“You forgot one.” He sneered as his cocks slowly pulled out of you, unwillingly as they tried to squirm their way back into your cunt.

You breathed out slowly, something that sounded too close to relief to Remy’s ears. Gritting his teeth, he gave in, and slammed back into you, making you squeal loudly and arch your back, his cocks hungrily exploring you once more.

“Let one of them slip out, and I’ll tie you up outside for a toy for my men, got it?” He hissed, heart warming slightly as you whined and clung to him, wrapping your legs obediently around his hips.

His tail uncoiled from its defensive position, lowering both of you from the great height he had you at. Instead, he started heading back to the manor, his cocks kept snug inside of you even as you passed his men, and went up the stairs.

“Don’t move an inch.” Remy snapped, laying on his back with you on his chest.

You heard a soft pop as Wren reappeared out of the darkness, looking delighted.

“Silly runaway. Got that out of your system?” He murmured to you as he crawled onto the bed. You nodded, teary eyed but still clinging to the naga. “Good.”

Wren straightened up momentarily, just to dip behind the both of you, pressing a kiss to where Remy’s cocks were curled into your cunt, making you both sigh at the warm tongue caressing the sensitive nerves.

He flopped back on the bed, pressing close to the two of you, arm splayed over the small of your back.

“No need to wander off anymore, darling. You’re where you’re supposed to be.”

Kofi

Masterlist

AO3

#commission #remy the farmer #wren the smuggler #wremussy #wremy #dol #nsft #degrees of lewdity #quincewrites #lurker anon #lurker the beloved

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ugh-yoongi · 1 year

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bts members as my skincare routine

(+ bonus smut recommendations)

inspired by @reliablemitten’s skincare & smut recs list that i was lucky enough to be included on. here, i will assign each member of bts a skincare product i am currently using with a smut recommendation to go with it. it is a little unhinged.

please enjoy. 🖤

park jimin • cleanser

i use the cetaphil gentle skin cleanser, and who is more gentle than jimin. he’s the person you want after a long, hard day. he’s the cleanser that’s going to see you fresh from the club, skin grubby from makeup and sweat and other associated grime, and he’s not going to bat an eye. he’s been in those trenches, too, no judgment. just make sure that water is room temperature. stop washing your face in the shower.

smut recommendation: the devil in his details by @johobi

jung hoseok • sunscreen

the obvious choice. hoseok is our resident sunshine, but sometimes he’s too hot and you need protection. i use the isntree hyaluronic acid sun gel. it’s spf 50+ and pa++++ so you know it’s putting in the work, just like our dance captain. it’s gentle and calming and protective. sounds familiar, doesn’t it?

smut recommendation: just practice by @lamourche

min yoongi • water

now you might be thinking, jewel, what do you mean yoongi is water. i mean yoongi is water! yoongi is our resident pisces with those little pisces teeth; he is water personified. plus, sometimes the best thing you can do for your skin is the simplest, and yoongi is a simple guy. you might think you like other things more, but you always return to water. (wash your face. btw i use tap water.)

smut recommendation: tear you apart by nutting on ao3

kim seokjin • moisturizer

water might be what’s best for your skin overall, but for a dry bitch like me, a good moisturizer is a holy grail. i use two: neutrogena hydro boost water gel, and seoul ceuticals multifunction all in one anti-aging snail repair cream. as a wise friend once said: jewel, you love your snail products. yes i do, but not as much as i love kim seokjin.

smut recommendation: all you’re giving me is friction by @hot-soop

kim namjoon • toner

sometimes i don’t know what’s best for me and i need an adult. also someone who’s way smarter than me. that’s why namjoon’s my toner. i use the ordinary’s glycolic acid 7% toning solution. it has solved all my problems, just like namjoon. ingrown hairs? gone. uneven skin? gone. the stubborn kp on my legs? mostly gone. however, they do both make me a little sticky…

smut recommendation: easy by tentigers on ao3

kim taehyung • exfoliator

let’s be serious, tae is a sweetheart but he’s also got an aries moon. as a fellow aries moon-haver, i get it. he’s baby but he’s also on weverse threatening to shoot someone in the neck, so he’s peak exfoliator. again, i use a couple: the slmd body smoothing system for my kp, the tropical mango tree hut shea sugar scrub for cheap general maintenance, and you can’t forget your noggin, so i use the kristin ess instant exfoliating scalp scrub there.

smut recommendation: pour up by @jungkxook

jeon jungkook • face mask

i need to be very honest for a second: i have a deep, deep fear that 2023 will be my jk stan era. a hot man with long hair and tattoos? he’s my type all over. but i’ve been strong. i’ve resisted. but i feel my resolve weakening, and that’s why jungkook is a face mask. i ordered the dr. jart+ ceramidin facial barrier mask to get free shipping from sukoshi mart, and joke’s on me, now i’m obsessed with it. i didn’t want to be obsessed with it, but sometimes the universe has other plans. i hate it here.

smut recommendation: city of trees by ginforink on ao3

[please note, some of these recs are mxm fics. totally cool if it’s not your thing! but don’t be a dickhead about it. thank u love u!]

#i have no idea how to tag this #bts as skincare #???#idk man

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eldritchsurveys · 2 months

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1177.

Have you ever bought a YouTuber’s merch? >> I haven't and I wouldn't.

Do you think oatmeal tastes better when made with water or milk? >> Milk. I like almond milk in mine, the unsweetened vanilla flavour especially.

Have you ever left a note in a library book? >> I have not.

What time of day do you prefer to wash your hair? >> I prefer to shower in the evening, so that's when I wash my scalp. Has anyone ever spread lies about you? >> Certainly.

Have you ever taken a photograph with a celebrity? If so, did it turn out the way you wanted, or do you wish you could retake it? >> I have. The one with Julianne Moore came out fine. I think my worst photo with a performer of any renown was the one with Pete Steele of Type O Negative, because the person taking the photo didn't wait for me to stop laughing before they snapped it. (This wouldn't have been a problem if I had a smartphone and could see it instantly, but this was 2009. I was still rockin with disposable cameras back then.) Which sucks because I will never get a chance to retake that photo and normally I would have been really happy to have it at all but it's ruined by how I look.

If you could move out of your home country permanently, would you? If so, where would you go? >> Most likely. I would want to go somewhere close to the Equator, mainly. I haven't researched specific countries because there's no point if it's never going to be possible, so that's as specific as my answer would get right now.

Is there a celebrity that everyone else seems to love, but you find totally overrated? Why is it that you don’t like them? >> I think that's just celebrities, period. The concept of celebrity in general is wildly overrated to me. I have favourite performers, of course, but I don't participate in any fandom/stan culture around celebrities or anything. If you could volunteer for any charity, which one would you choose? Do you think it’s more important to help humans, or are animal and environmental charities equally important? .

Do you prefer holidays where you relax, or actually do things? .

Do you think that after we die our spirit is still alive? >> I don't have a single solid belief about what happens to a sapient person's spirit post-death. I think many possibilities are likely.

Has anybody ever told you that you could be a model? >> I've had men say that to me as either a come-on or to try to get me to do sex work.

Do you use different kinds of moisturizer for different body parts? ie. hand lotion for your hands, face cream for your face. Or do you just use one moisturizer for all body parts? >> I have a face moisturiser and a body moisturiser. I could probably get more granular than that but that gets expensive so I think I'll stick to this unless I develop a problem area that demands special attention.

Have you ever felt like you were someone’s rebound? >> I haven't felt that.

Has anybody ever broken up with you over something really pathetic? What was it? Have you ever been dumped in a disrespectful way? (eg. through text, through a friend..) >> I don't think so.

Did you have a lot of role models as a kid? >> I don't recall ever having a role model. Do you feel like anyone looks up to you? Why or why not? >> I do not feel this. What do you mean, why not...

What was the last thing you found offensive? . Who is the nicest person you know? .

Do you feel safe in your country? >> Not especially. I mean, mostly, but also not. There's a pretty broad spectrum between "I live in an active war zone/a hellish fascist regime" and "I live in a free and liberal utopia" and when it comes to marginalised peoples the United States really likes playing around in spaces that are closer to the former than you'd gather from all the propaganda about it being the latter.

Do you feel safe where you live? >> In this city, specifically? More or less, although there's been stuff like racially-motivated police brutality/murder here too just like damn near everywhere in this country. Also, once you step a pinky toe outside the city limits the conservatism level skyrockets. So.

Have you been falsely diagnosed with something by a bad doctor? >> I don't think it's entirely accurate to say that all my misdiagnoses were because the clinicians were bad at their job. I mean, they might have been! But I also think that both autism and complex developmental trauma (and their intersections with each other and other social factors) are consistently wildly misunderstood by the exact professionals whose job it is to understand them, which is a systemic issue as opposed to specific individuals being bad at doctoring.

Have you ever had a doctor refuse to treat you? >> I have not had this experience. Name the strangest game you’ve ever played (video game or real game): >> lol "real game". There are some Twine games and Itch.io games that could fit this description, I think. That's where you're going to get truly weird, offbeat, occult shit -- in very small games made by one or two weird people who had a vision and nothing to keep them from realising that vision.

Do you know anyone who has been struck by lightning before? >> I don't think so.

Which cartoon character would you want to keep as a pet? .

Do you like marshmallows? >> I do.

What is your favorite flavor of candy cane? >> I don't care for candy canes mainly because I find their shape inconvenient and frustrating. Have you ever fostered an animal? >> I have not.

Do you still take hot showers when it’s hot out? >> Sure. When writing $ sign, do you draw one line through the S or two? >> One. What animal have you always wanted as a pet but couldn’t have? . List three people you’ve had crushes on: .

Have you ever thrown up from cramps? >> Way too many times. I can't believe we're just expected to live like that.

List three people you had a hard time forgiving. .

Who is the most spiritual person you know? .

Would you ever start a vlog? >> I wouldn't. I can't even be bothered to make TikToks.

Are your dreams coming true yet? .

Do you struggle with depression? >> I struggle with some things that do sometimes look like depression.

Are you haunted by your past? >> I don't think I'd use this phrasing, but the more I think about it, the more it maybe is accurate. What is the inner critic if not the ghostly echoes of all the people who mistreated and neglected me, for example?

What medical conditions do you have? . Do you use a Magic Bullet? >> Oh my god... I definitely was thinking of Magic Wand at first. Good thing my other brain cell kicked in and made me second-guess that, lmao. Anyway, no, I don't have a Magic Bullet (or a Magic Wand, for the record).

What does your apron look like? . What are your favorite spicy foods? >> Oh, I don't know. I just like foods in general to have a bit of spice.

Which do you like better: being an adult or being a kid? >> I would never, ever, ever in my fucking life want to be a child with no rights or agency that is subject to the whims of bigger people again. Were you excited to be a teenager on your thirteenth birthday? >> I don't know.

Did you feel insecure in high school? >> I don't know, man. I just felt bad. Generally bad. All the time.

Would you ever be friends with someone who was suicidal? >> The nuance required to answer this question is astronomical and I'm not doin that right now. Who was the biggest bully in high school? .

What was your favorite class in high school? .

Would you rather have a daughter or a son? . Have you ever written to an advice columnist? >> I haven't, although sometimes I wish I could write to Ask Polly.

Have you ever had a doctor not believe what you told him? >> I have rarely had any concerns to bring to a doctor in the first place.

If you’re female, would you feel uncomfortable having a male gynecologist? >> I'm not female and it doesn't matter what gender my hypothetical gynaecologist is. I'll be massively triggered the entire time anyway, it has nothing to do with the person who is (ideally) just doing their job.

Do you like Lisa Frank? >> Sure. Also, one time I saw a YouTube video about the whole drama behind the Lisa Frank brand and it was juicy. What gives you nightmares? .

Were you ever hospitalized as a child? >> I was not.

Did you get senior pictures taken? >> I did.

What color is your bicycle? >> Orange and black.

Did you ever have to take home a fake baby in health class? >> This was probably the highlight of my ninth grade year. I took the Life Skills (or whatever it was called... something like that) class specifically to get the computerised baby. I also angled to get a weekend instead of just an overnight. I did really well, too, lol.

Would you rather wear ivory or white on your wedding day? What color will your bridesmaids wear? >> Neither of us wore white and we didn't have bridesmaids.

Would you rather have a swimming pool or trampoline? >> Trampoline.

Do you think babies are cute? >> Sure.

Do you dream about the future a lot? >> I don't dream about the future at all.

Do you think about your past a lot? >> I don't think about it, like, consciously. It just informs a lot of my present. I'm always carrying it around with me.

How good are you at living in the moment? >> I am always in the moment. Even when I am actively in flashback I am still in the moment. That's the strange thing about it all -- being in this strange liminal time warp where I am clearly my present self but also clearly feeling and acting from another point in time. A disorienting tension, the illusion of linearity collapsing in on itself.

Have you ever questioned God’s existence? >> Sure, long ago. Vanilla frosting or chocolate? >> I am a frosting hater as a rule but every once in a while I hit upon some good frosting that I can appreciate (sparingly -- I still don't like it in abundance, just as a little extra flavour/texture boost). That could apply to vanilla or chocolate.

What’s your favorite foreign cuisine? >> My favourite cultural cuisine is hard to pinpoint, I just like many, many different kinds of foods.

Have you ever moved to another state? >> I have.

Did you do anything productive today? >> I made some progress in Control, I kept myself fed, I started a new anime, and I managed whatever's going on with my nervous system with some THC. Can you say the alphabet backwards? >> Eventually.

Do you like flowers? >> Sure.

Have you ever thought you were gonna die? >> Sure. What kind of mood are you in today? >> I've been in some kind of fatigue-y dysregulated funk these past couple of days. Today was better than yesterday but I still don't feel fully out of the abyss just yet.

What are you craving right now? >> Nothing. Is there anyone you would seriously punch right now if you had the chance? >> There is not.

What is worse, physical or emotional pain? .

Have you ever walked in on somebody doing something… questionable? >> Questionable???

If you were to make videos on YouTube, what would they be of? .

Posting pictures of yourself in a bathing suit on the internet - ok or not? . Do you typically laugh when somebody falls down? >> Typically not, but every once in a while someone just eats it in a real comical way and I can't help but laugh.

What is the most disturbing movie you’ve ever watched? >> I mean, I've seen just about every movie that usually appears on those "10 Most Disturbing Films" listicles and shit. That's kind of a thing I'm into, movies that are just super fucked up and disgusting.

Your opinion of Katy Perry, please? >> I have none. Genuinely could not care less about this person or their art.

If you could say anything to your Mom right now… what would it be? .

#surveys #survey #random survey

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