Something that kills me about q!Charlie is that he really wasn’t a good parent. At first.
It’s canon that he doesn’t come from a great household, and it’s obvious that he was trying.
He didn’t know how to parent, and the early days of Juanaflippa and Charlie were ROUGH to say the least!
And then he was getting better, there was a turning point in his parenting, for the better!
And then she died.
I wonder if part of the reason why Charlie has had such a visceral reaction to Flippa’s death (between trying to kill the other eggs, eggzile, just his general awful mental health and coping mechanisms), was because she was deprived from the life she deserved, the life Charlie and Mariana, after everything happened, after Charlie realized he wasn’t a good parent and was doing his best to become better and was on the way to that, were going to give her.
She was taken away, after everything, and now she will never get the life, the nice happy life, that she would have been given, that she deserved.
Charlie was mad at himself, for failing as a father (even if it wasnt his fault), and for not giving Juanaflippa the life she rightfully deserved.
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do any of you guys ever feel like theres still things youre still childishly dumb about that u wouldnt be able to talk about with like relatives or like in polite conversation with like a potential employer or some shit. Like just now i was thinking mainly of geography im so unbearably geographically incompetent that even just trying to describe where i live makes me break out into a sweat. if someones describing a location or place to me i say ahh yeah and in my head is a monkey clapping cymbols togerher
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spent so long today trying to set up my laptop so that i can still draw stuff when i visit home and be able to sync files between it and my desktop automatically and sat down now and realized my laptop's screen being about 50% the size of my desktop monitor may be a bit of an issue actually
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Thoughts on odazai? I wondered if your reasons for disliking dazai apply to this ship since it doesn't seem to function the same way other popular dazai ships do
Mmmmhh okay first off, I'm afraid my dislike for Dazai transcends all ships (╥﹏╥)
But I do think odazai is very enjoyable for its own uniqueness!! Oda is the only person Dazai respects, literally, and that's bound to make their relationship distinctive and unique. I feel like respect should come with every healthy relationship, so you see the appeal here? Odazai is the only ship that shows a side of Dazai that finally feels authentic– it shows a side of Dazai that is willing to care. For the rest of the franchise Dazai's character is pretty much up to interpretation, there's the mystery element of never being able to tell what's going through his mind, but Oda's existence alone is enough to show us a true face of Dazai for once– which is nice, because Oda showed us a side of Dazai that is capable of love. Which wasn't exactly predictable given Dazai's nihilism, cruelty and apparent disregard of human life; and yet even him is capable of love. And he truly is! Even if you don't like them romantically, Dazai's love (platonic, if you prefer) for Oda is undeniably there, and it's nice, it's miraculous to get to witness it. In a way, Anon, maybe you're right! I don't like Dazai, and still odazai has the power of making Dazai feel sympathetic: because it shows you a man who cares about another person, and who would do anything for them; and then that person is taken away from him. You just can't not feel sympathy for that, it's inherently human to relate to and be touched by another man's suffering, and a thousand times more so when such suffering is moved by love. Odazai is the only ship that makes me want to ship it because I think it would make Dazai happy, and makes me feel happy for him.
Odazai is a sweet, tragic, comforting ship. People have definitely put it more eloquently and in detail than me, but it's just the completely lack of judgement on both sides which is SUCH an appealing aspect. They can be their true authentic selves with each other, and it must have been so staggering and exhilarating and overwhelming for Dazai specifically who probably didn't even know who he himself was– how much human he could be. There's the mutual respect, the genuine admiration. There's the feeling of being accepted and understood like they aren't by anyone else– they both share this morally grey view of the world, and they are the only ones who aren't judgemental of the other's lack of morals; they get each other. In a world that results meaningless to them, they can be each other's reason to live. Then there's the making each other better?? Seriously, what other ship makes Dazai even slightly better. Oda canonically changed Dazai's whole existence prompting him to do good for the rest of his life with six words. And again, the fact alone that Oda is the only person to ever make Dazai capable of love– that's as good as it can get! Dazai is the best he can be as soon as he allows himself to be vulnerable and emotional and soft and honest, and Oda prompted him to do exactly that. And I know that's very arguable, but we literally do not know if Dazai ever truly loved anyone after joining the good guys, or if he's just doing good things because Oda asked him to instead of having an innate will to do good for a genuine love of human beings– maybe he's really doing all of that solely because he loved a man and he will never love anyone else; we really have no way to know, and it's up to interpretation. My take, while we're at it (because I'm drunk on tiredness and I can't stop talking), is that Dazai, even if coming from a place of having no fondness for humans and exclusively doing good because he was asked to rather than for a true conviction, got so accustomed to doing good, he actually... Became good (Aristotle and moral virtue being something you can get better at by practicing it). In that case, Oda would be someone who literally taught Dazai to love, and that's beautiful in its own way.
I didn't get much into Oda's side of the relationship; I feel like I don't know Oda a lot, I only watched the Dark Era episodes of the anime once ten months ago and even Beast doesn't feel like giving away much of his personality. But I do like to think he would love Dazai; if else, I feel like Dazai too is a special person to Oda like no one else is.
Also like, there's the fact that they're quite literally canon. Like I don't know what to tell you it's literally there. Not that many men out there Osamu Dazai would literally abandon everything he's ever known, completely turn his life upside down, start doing good without even believing in good, for. Characters who aren't canonically gay but who's actions don't make any sense until you interpret them as gay and stuff. It barely even count as queerbating tbh like it's just right there.
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❛ with all due respect, i am gonna completely ignore everything you just said. ❜ / @roysenal
dick rolled his eyes. but this time, it wasn't with his heart pounding in his ears at the fear of failure in his friend's bravado. the words weren't taken with taut shoulders, tightly wound to compartmentalize and pack in all the stress a high stakes mission could create. it wasn't setting off that little nerve that pulsated too close to his brain --- made the seed of annoyance grow until the roots gripped his rationality with blinding fear and anger.
instead, it was marked by a knowing smile cracking his sun-warmed face and all the ease of summer. " i'm telling you it won't hold, speedy. " because OF COURSE, roy couldn't let dick's cannonball record be the winner. sitting on the little dock just left of the trees and still sopping wet from where he'd just exited his grandest performance, dick has to squint into the sun to get even a glimpse of ginger hair. he finds him eventually, muscled archer's arms reaching up, branch after branch to get HIGHER than the usual jumping spot. the trees weren't even tall enough for them to ever reach worrisome heights, and any spot but the center was over deep enough water that all a slip would do is bruise one very large ego. but right at the end --- right where showman roy harper was sure to eye as his great diving board was too thin to get any real balance before jumping. it would snap, and down it would fall, dragging with it one, second place stuntman. the acrobat swipes at the little droplets of water obscuring his vision, getting the bulk of damp bangs out from his face and squinting one blue eye back up at his target before deciding to raise the stakes of roy's vying for gold. " i'll bet you . . . " dick gives himself a second for roy to gain even footing and himself to decide on the wager, corner of his mouth in what seemed like a permanent uptick as june progressed. " anything that you don't get a single flip in. "
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me every week at my therapist: i just dont see the value in drawing unless i can show it to someone
also me for 800+ hours building an acnh island where idc if no one sees it bc i get to run around on it myself:
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