#I genuinely wonder if people actually read through all these sandbox thoughts

[aijee]

tw // mentions of rape

imo u shouldn’t stop updating bc of the accusations against mg. headlines were fucking misleading, i actually thought he raped someone at first bcos of the word choice. ure writing about his public persona, not him irl. we dk him either way so is not like ure violating something or breaking ur morals or whatever. op literally stated that mg never made any comments towards her or touched her in any way, he just made jokes that made her uncomfortable but never directed to her, she explicitly said that mg was not the cause for her to go to therapy & the bullying accusations have been proven to be fake. i-carats decided to translate the new SA accusations without being fluent in korean and that caused a huge misunderstanding, that’s why k- and j- carats have been calmer about it. u shouldn’t believe the screenshots of the other op either bcos there has also been a lot of inconsistencies of them, like the time stamp with the battery issue, etc. due to some mistranslations, all of us thought that the chest touching person was a girl when it’s a guy, inconsistencies like that make the this op more invalid cuz with changes happening constantly, the story becomes less believable, hope yk what i mean. fuck i-carats for mistranslating and blaming him for everything, and for making this issue more complicated than it has to be, like with the chest op. they’re even the cause some ppl don’t believe anything. sorry if i sound like an asshole but i’m mad. if he did make the comments, i believe he’s most likely changed. i used to make rape jokes but now i definitely know better. pretty sure he does as well, yk how the treats ppl now, how gentle and kind he is now, etc. however, if he did touch the guy, obviously i will not support him anymore. i’m not trying to defend him but i’m clearing some things up. hope ure neutral abt this. have a good day & really hope u don’t stop updating.

Thank you for your honesty and raw feelings, anon. It’s okay to be mad and have feelings, especially when those feelings aren’t exactly good feelings. Unrelated to the actual Situation(tm), my therapist told me something like, “Try thinking of feelings as just feelings. They come and go. They aren’t necessarily reflective of you as a person.” I thought that my bad feelings or opinions of others prevented me from being good or a functioning person. Fact: people are multifaceted as hell and that’s valid.

Re: morals, that’s fair insight for sure. I think my hesitation comes with the inherent visualization and association of that persona with the person himself, if that makes sense. E.g. when I’m reading RPF, I still visualize the faces of the individuals involved like actors in my mind. In that sense, perhaps it’s a personal discomfort mixing with morals with regard to writing RPF with a certain name and face in mind, who happen to be attached to a persona/person attached to allegations that may or may not be true. In short, it’s messy and vague and I’m still in the middle of figuring things out myself.

I have and always will be a proponent of professional, paid translations—as in, looking towards people who translate for a living. Professional translation is extremely serious work; imagine how important it is in medicine, law, business? There is always a doubtful voice in my head towards fan translations, regardless of the content. That’s not to undermine the hard work of people learning another language, engaging in content they enjoy, wanting to share it with people, etc. But in very serious cases that could possibly really, really hurt people, I will never fully trust translations I can’t pin to a reliable source. It’s easy to reflexively trust fan translations since they objectively control so much of international fans’ consumption of content. It’s also easy for international fans to fixate on wordings in translations when suddenly the faves are doing something questionable (Do we question fansubs on casual videos? Not really). In reality what we need to focus on is the ideas presented, because translations will never be 100% accurate, especially those done by fans.

If it gives you any perspective, an interesting problem for POC’s healthcare experience is that bilingual kids of monolingual parents are often pinned as the “translator.” Yes, they’re able to communicate in multiple languages, but the specificity of the information presented, and the importance of detail, can be lost in translation, even for those who grew up learning two languages natively. Why? Because they don’t learn the minutiae of translation. You’ll often see professional translators constantly using references, relearning things over and over again, etc. Normal multilingual people focus on getting messages across, not those tiny, tiny details. Food for thought.

How people approach, perceive and interact with people attached to abuse is a very messy thing. There is very rarely a “right” answer. I fully support your approach with whatever happens, whether it stays the same or evolves. For my two cents, I think it’s important to remember that the most important relationship in this moment remains that of Mingyu with the potential victim(s) involved; we hold our relationships with our faves so sacred, but I’m just putting that out there for some more perspective I personally think is important. And a third cent: there are people really close to me in my life who have, frankly, abused me. That’s partly why I’m seeing a therapist. But that doesn’t mean I fully reject them, or will never harbor good feelings towards them ever. Abusive behavior can still be exhibited by fundamentally good people, as paradoxical as that sounds. People are capable of growth; goodness and badness aren’t necessarily inherent and unchangeable. I fully respect and admire you for owning your emotions like that! That can be hard to do comfortably.

I’m not invalidating your response whatsoever! At least, that’s not my intention. I just wanted to present some things to think about. It’s also okay if your opinions don’t or do change. It’s still pretty early in the fiasco.

#askaijee #I just...write so much #I genuinely wonder if people actually read through all these sandbox thoughts

[bookofmirth]

I had thoughts about the acotar fandom and fandom etiquette and I'm not sorry.

I genuinely wonder if people wandered into the acotar fandom last year, after having read acosf, and didn't understand what corner of the internet they ended up in. Fandom is inherently very queer, in the broadest sense of the word. In the Judith Butler sense. Not just that there are gays everywhere, but there are disabled and neurodivergent and minoritized identities. We are here looking for more from canon, not just reinforcement that what we thought about canon was right. Fandom has existed for a long time to give stories to people who never saw themselves in the story, or who felt constricted by the mainstream, who felt like there wasn't a place for them in the media they consumed.

So when I see the acotar fandom being snide about "crackships" - though that's not an insult, it's just a description of how likely the pairing is in canon - and when I see the acotar fandom acting like shipping is a political stance/social justice cause, or when I see this fandom not understanding that you can ship things that have not been confirmed on the page, I have to wonder - where do these people think they are???

The most important thing about fandom imo is that there are no rules other than the number 1 rule: you are in control of your experience. That means that you block tags, or people, or follow tags, or people, or create, or consume, or whatever it is you want, but you cannot try to force your version of fandom on anyone else. If you don't like how someone else is engaging in the fandom, you block them and move on. It's that simple. There is no such thing as fandom police, it's every person for themselves. If you personally cannot stand the idea of Elain and Mor, then block that tag. If you really feel incredibly strongly about it, then block the people who use that tag. It's super simple, and it's been fandom practice for... literally decades now.

The acotar fandom has actually made this rule quite difficult in the past year because, for example, I have blocked upwards of 150 people on tumblr, and yet I know that some of those people continue to stalk my blog and make posts vaguing me. I've made my boundaries clear, those boundaries have been disrespected, and I know I am not the only one who experiences this. At least two times, people have taken me blocking them as a "challenge" to still try to interact with me despite the block. Thus far, my choices are to either attack those people head on, or act like they don't exist. I quite like pretending that they don't exist because those people are a waste of my time. However, I am not the only person they do this to and I know that turning the other cheek isn't that easy all the time, especially when certain people are so aggressive about being assholes.

The fact that people get mad at other users blocking them, that just baffles me. Again, blocking people is a time-honored and necessary tradition in fandom. You do not have to scroll through content you don't want, and having a presence in the fandom doesn't mean you have to allow all people access to your content! "This person blocked a bunch of us so we can't interact!" Yes, well, that's the point! They have drawn a line in the sandbox, you are not entitled to interact with whomever you want, and you should definitely respect the fact that someone has, for literally whatever reason they want, decided that they don't want to interact with you. The audacity of people getting mad about being blocked - is that harming you, somehow? Is that preventing you from screaming whatever you want to scream on your own blog? No? So what's the problem, exactly?

no 👏 one 👏 here 👏 owes 👏 you 👏 anything 👏

Disrespecting people's right to ship or headcanon or imagine whatever the fuck they want is another way that this rule continues to be violated. People are allowed to dislike/like whatever they want. Again, this is all about the only rule, you are in charge of your experience. Shaming people for what they like - whether it's a fluffy crackship or an abusive rarepair - is not okay. If you don't like something, then it's on you to block the content. It's not on you to show people the "error" of their ways because that's literally the opposite of why we are here!

It is not okay to tell other people how to exist in the fandom, and this moralistic high ground that people are taking in order to justify their shaming of other people is especially not it. That's the exact rationale that people are now using to say that in certain schools in the U.S., the idea of queer people existing is verboten. Why, oh why, do people think it's okay to come into one of the queerest space on the internet, and start throwing around morality-based arguments, when those types of morality-based argument are being used IRL to silence us??? Because people ended up in fandom and had no idea where they were (and apparently, still don't).

We exist in fandom (in part) because we already feel like there isn't a place for us in the mainstream. We are not going to allow a bunch of people who are so stuck up their ass in heteronormativity and whiteness and canon, to tell us what we can and cannot ship in fandom, a space that was historically made by and for queer people.

Example: if you don't like a specific ship, then you block that tag. The end. Maybe you talk about why you, personally, are not into it. We all have squicks. but you do not shame people for liking it, or try to tell them how and why it's bad that they like it. There is a HUGE difference between saying "here is why I don't like this" and saying "no one should ever like this!"

Fandom has etiquette, including tagging things appropriately, but the flip side of that is the understanding that tagging is a privilege, not a right. Fandom functions on the assumption that we are each looking out for one another by tagging content appropriately, but the second part of that assumption is that we do not tell one another what to do - if someone breaks rule number 1, then you decide if that bothers you or not. You cannot force them to comply, but you can block their ass. This is only tangentially related, but still relevant. It's still part of the whole "you are in control of your own experience" rule that we all live by.

I guess the whole point of this is to say: live and let live, y'all.

If someone draws a boundary, respect that.

Learn how to draw your own boundaries.

Stop being so freaking stuck on canon because that is not why we are here.

And have a gay gay gay gay day.

#acotar #acosf #fandom things #acotar fandom

[incarnateirony]

I think the issue with death as a happy ending (to a story, I should point out - death can be many things in many places, but I’m specifically talking about it in fiction) is that it’s usually written so badly that it doesn’t feel like a happy ending and it just feels like shit. There’s a very limited number of fictional works that I’ve seen actually manage it well - though in saying that, I have a very limited range, and I don’t really enjoy new things because (reasons). The ones I do recall, it’s because they were just that good and bittersweet is exactly the way I would describe them as a happy ending.

Firebringer was a novel I read when I was 12 or 13, and I still recall it. It was about a deer and it was his entire life - birth to death - and it was a happy ending. I cried through the last few chapters. Then I reread it and cried some more. It was good.

There’s also a fic I want to mention, because it’s on the topic. It’s called The white whale. and it’s by an author named orange_crushed. The entire premise of the fic is that Dean (and Sam, but it’s a destiel fic) is already dead. He died years ago. The title itself should say a lot, and the fic itself is about finding peace. It’s brilliant and beautiful, and I love it.

My perspective on death is a bit. Odd, maybe? I grew up somewhere between Christian (mum and dad and church, a mix of Baptist and Anglican) and animist (local indigenous spirituality), and while bit of both inform my interpretation, I’m very nearly atheist.

I don’t really believe in an afterlife, or rebirth, or anything like that. I believe that this is it. We get one shot at being who we want to be and acting as we choose with what we’re given. (“And isn’t it so wonderful, that we were alive at the same time?”)

I first heard the Freedom From vs Freedom To argument when reading the handmaid’s tale in my English class at school. It wasn’t even presented as an argument, everyone just seemed to agree that freedom to is better. I believe that, too. But freedom from has structure. It’s not “peaceful” and it can’t be when it is enforced, but it is informed by rules, and there it has expectations and is reliable (where reliable means we know what the consequences are, even if they’re awful). Freedom to is anarchy (which I have come to appreciate more). But neither freedom is peace.

There’s a quote I really love, and I can never recall it properly and it goes something like this: “War is an ugly thing, but it is not the ugliest. The decayed and degraded state of moral feeling which thinks nothing is worth war is much worse. A man who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing more important than his own personal fucking safety, is [the worst thing]” clearly I don’t recall it very well. It’s from an old bit of hp fanfic, of all things, a very violent and disgusting version of civil war - as war is. It was the beginning of why I’m not a pacifist.

I dunno. I guess I really feel like peace - true, genuine peace - can’t be done. It’s certainly worth striving for, worth trying, but peace is either isolation and loneliness or death. Peace is knowing you’ve done everything you can, that it was enough, and being able to let it go.

Any way I think I had a point somewhere in this, maybe something about being unable to put down a fight while you’re living, maybe something about how death can be kind, maybe something about how good writing can make sad things happy, maybe that bittersweet is still sweet. Idk.

Feel free to reply to this mess of ideas or not - or pick and choose what you want to reply to, if you’d like to reply to specific parts. I mostly just wanted to share (I can do discussion, but idk if I’m still gunna have any focus later to do so, or if I’ll even see a response) some thoughts and you’re usually the only person I see on my dash with this sort of ~vague philosophy things~.

Woah when did anons get to let someone submit something so long.

Either way, a few points on this.

1. a thoughtful piece, this is a philosophy piece I will gladly entertain. However, if we are entertaining philosophy we must

2. acknowledge this is a nihilistic piece contingent on your personal world views, that while valid, and I will not take any effort to undermine on a personal belief system level

3. do not have much to do with (dependent on fringe atheism or, perhaps, agnosticism) a piece that is far from secular and atheistic while also

4. relying on the idea that “I really feel like peace - true, genuine peace - can’t be done. It’s certainly worth striving for, worth trying, but peace is either isolation and loneliness or death.”, which is itself the very nihilistic idea imparted by Chuck’s matrix but, whether you believe it in the real world, is the active target of subversion within this fantasy world, (eg, a heaven revolution where the doors are opened just like they were in hell.)

5. Finally, presumptuous that it would not be ‘well written’ and predesignating a potential discontent with the delivery that would sour it, especially with the previous points.

That said, while I’m not going to argue directly with your real life belief system -- even if they clearly disagree with my own -- I do remind you--falling back to your point that you do not believe in an afterlife: we know this fictional story does not hold this belief, ergo using that as a judgment for how it would deliver the concept of eternity is itself already wounding oneself to receiving the moral of the canon. One can not suddenly expect SPN to become a secular show just because a viewer has secular and atheistic beliefs. It is inherently asecular, theistic, and gnostic in its bones and the story will thus tell itself within that structure, which then begs if one is willing to suspend a personal belief system for a fictional canon setting they are digesting the story of.

Similarly-and-so, this is contingent on believing that the heroes’ journey will end with them maintaining the current status quo, rather than making a world where--in this fictional world in which an afterlife exists--death does not itself mean loneliness, but rather reunion.

If we can suspend our beliefs in some shows with fighting dragons or farting lightning bolts (after all, nonnie references HP fanfic), I would hope people could suspend them in regards to a moral telling of found family and the sovereignty of man in a divine and moral play.

If one were to demand SPN have entirely atheistic storytelling, the only real way to handle an ending would be to have one of the characters wake up from a 15 year coma where none of it was real and it was all a dream or something to that affect which--lol, we’re not doing, I promise. I’m sorry, but we’re not.  We’re not taking the “none of it mattered because none of it happened” angle. We’re not going to a world where angels and the afterlife don’t exist, we’re not going to collapse it where suddenly death IS the true end and life sucks and then you die, it’s just not going to happen.

So the point then is an active choice on the part of the viewer: is this suddenly the line you draw after watching a theistic show for 15 years, doubling down that this specific theistic point is the one thing we can’t accept (despite it existing in the past already), or do we continue to watch a theistic show and interpret its theistic points as the story is trying to depict? And if it’s the “drawing the sudden line,” that is, quite frankly, a personal choice to have spontaneous discontent with a critical part of a canon story’s telling at a very sudden drawn line in the sand. 

The point to exit would have been pilot 1.01 if we were going to have fundamental problems with spirits and an afterlife as crucial elements of a story. And if not then, 4.01 with angels. And if not then-- you see where this goes on. There were multiple exit ramps if the idea of an afterlife, which became more and more directly explored, was going to be an issue in reception of or enjoyment of a text. So now we’re 15 years later, and we can’t expect the highway to reroute just because we didn’t take the other 100 ramps.

SPN will tell the full spread of its moral and divine play within the full spread of its moral and divine sandbox, which someone has--to reach the ending--accepted for fifteen years at this point. If one has a fundamental problem with the entire premise of the show, it is not an obligation to any writer to cater to someone who intrinsically disagrees with the entire structure of the body of work to fulfill something within a completely different paradigm. It’s not.

Am I lucky in that it matches my beliefs? Maybe. Also cursed. Very very cursed. Because it’s led to being Through The Looking Glass for two years to the point there’s a segment of fandom that treats me as a magic 8 ball--and sometimes rightfully so, not to sound like I’m tooting my own horn or whatever. It just knows I get the structure in play to a fault. But cursed knowledge aside -- and trust me, it’s cursed as FUCK most of the time -- in the end, even when I watch shows that don’t match my personal theology, I don’t sit here and suddenly expect them to do so. There’s plenty of shows I completely suspend my beliefs in to enjoy within the sandbox they were designed in the constraints of so I find it very weird to project a discontent with a body of fictional canon presenting ideas within its own rule set based on personal beliefs in a real life lens. I mean, I don’t believe dragons exist, but if I watch the Dragon Prince for many seasons, I can’t suddenly expect the ending to have nothing to do with Dragons?

I mean, the show is literally called Supernatural. It's right there in the name. There are going to be supernatural elements about the show. My banner image is literally a reborn soul floating down the aisle. This isn't gonna suddenly be irrelevant at the end.

#supernatural #fandom #meta #pagan life #my meta #philosophy

[britesparc]

Weekend Top Ten #454

Top Ten Launch Games 

Oooh, it’s finally here!  

By the time you read this, the Xbox Series X/S consoles will be out, and the PlayStation 5 will be imminent if not already with us. At the time of writing I’ve yet to sample either console, although hopefully that will soon change. However, it’s a bit of a weird console launch, especially for Xbox owners, as there’s not much in the way of actual launch titles. PlayStation has the excellent-looking technical showcase (in that it shows off their sexy new controller, if not necessarily the excesses of the console’s visual prowess) Astro’s Playroom. But on the Xbox side, the only genuine first-party exclusive (not including the port of rather smashing PC title Gears Tactics) was to be the troubled Halo Infinite, which has now been pushed to next year to deal with some of its apparent graphical deficiencies. For what it’s worth, as a Halo fan, I thought the actual gameplay presented looked as good as it always has, so I’m still very excited, but it’s a shame not to sample something genuinely new and shiny at launch. For me, then – as someone not getting a PlayStation this year – I’m going to have to contend myself with updated versions of older games, and hopefully something like the really exciting-looking The Falconeer or, eventually, Cyberpunk 2077.  

Of course, it’s not always been like this; in the past, a landmark game has often been the core reason to upgrade to a new console. Certain titles have defined their hardware platforms, offering a taste of the experiences to come, be it through revolutionary control systems, previously-unimaginable graphics, or simply by shattering preconceptions and expectations. As such, this weekend I’m celebrating my favourite launch titles. 

Now, a couple of my usual caveats. I’ve hardly owned any consoles in the grand scheme of things; I was a computer gamer until the launch of the first Xbox, and even then was PC-first until about midway through the 360’s life. As such I came to a lot of these late, or played them on friends’ systems. I’m sure a videogame historian would give you another list, one that was able to put each title into its historical perspective. For my part, I’m mostly basing it on how much I like the game, but I am also trying to weight it in terms of its “importance”. I mean, one of my favourite “launch titles” of all time would be Lego Marvel Super Heroes on the Xbox One/PS4, but that seems a bit of a ridiculous game to call a launch title, especially as it doesn’t really show off the hardware or define the generation in any particular way. I just think it rocks. So I’m trying to judge it also in terms of how effective a given game was at being a launch title, as well as my personal preference; as such, some games, which I think are more emblematic of their time or their hardware, might end up higher in the list than if I was otherwise just ranking my favourites.  

Christ, that was boring. Look, here are ten games that I like that came out when a console came out. Have at it. 

Halo: Combat Evolved (Xbox, 2001): it’s not just that it made playing an FPS on a console as comfortable and enjoyable as on PC, but it revolutionised what an FPS could do. Expansive open landscapes, dynamic combat with intelligent enemies, an ingenious shield/health combo, two weapons, drivable vehicles, and frankly outstanding graphics. And for Xbox – a curious underdog, a big black sheep devoid of cool or class and feeling like Microsoft was trying to buy its way into the console space with a hefty dose of brute force – here was something unique, something incredible. I don’t think anyone quite expected Halo, and it’s arguable that it single-handedly changed not only Microsoft and Xbox’s fortunes but the entire game industry too.  

Wii Sports (Wii, 2005): the Wii was this strange outlier, a tiny white box that eschewed the grunt and girth of its rivals, and seemingly built around its unique motion controller. Would it work? Wii Sports proved that yes it would, a delightful bundle of games that perfectly showed what the console and controller could do. Immense fun in and of itself, but the Wii’s ability to lower the barrier of entry to non-gamers meant that your dad could thrash your brother at bowling. And that is a thing to cherish forever. 

Tetris (GameBoy, 1989): depending on where you look, Tetris may just be the best-selling game of all time. It’s on everything now, from the Xbox Series X to your watch. But there was a time when “Tetris” meant “GameBoy”; that four-colour greenscreen box of wonder that everybody had but me. It was beyond ubiquitous, and its short-form nature and simplistic styling made it ideal for the portable console, its chirpy and iconic music sounding perfect coming from those tiny speakers. And above all else, of course, Tetris is fantastic, one of the greatest games of all time. It was a perfect marriage of software and hardware. 

The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild (Switch, 2017): so here’s the thing: I like Zelda, but I’ve never fallen in love with it. I didn’t grow up with it, so coming to Ocarina of Time, there were too many old-fashioned trappings in the way; it just didn’t feel as enthralling or as fun to play as, say, Half-Life or Deus Ex. BOTW changed that; the limitations were gone, the world was blown wide open. It no longer felt like an 80s game in three dimensions, it felt new. Better than new – it felt like tomorrow. Despite the Switch being graphically weaker than its contemporaries, BOTW was and is simply gorgeous to look at, but it’s how it plays, how it feels like a vast but real world, how it has its own rules and they make sense instantly. It’s the greatest open world game of all time, and emergent physics sandbox, and yet it’s still unquestionably Zelda, emphatically Nintendo. Okay, it technically came out on the Wii U at the same time, but who the hell played that? This was the game that made you want a Switch.  

Super Mario 64 (N64, 1997): this is often the game people cite as being one of the great revolutionary launch titles, but I must confess its charms were lost to me at first. Taking what was great about Mario and converting it expertly into 3D was a heck of a feat; graphically for the time it certainly impressed in the scale of its worlds, and whilst back then I felt it lacked the detail and granularity of some PC titles, in retrospect it was a perfectly-suited art style, offering smooth textures even when right up close. But it was its precise controls and the open, hub-based nature of its worlds that was revolutionary; many games aped its style, but it took a long time before anything really matched it.  

Hexic HD (Xbox 360, 2005): not every game here has to be some genre-busting graphical powerhouse; they can be simple but quietly revolutionary. Hexic HD is a terrific puzzle game with a simple hook, brilliantly executed, and enough intrigue and nuance to keep you coming back for one more go, to beat your high score, to get to the next tricksy level. But the time and manner of its release, and what that signified, marked it out as something more important. It was the first Xbox Live Arcade title; Microsoft’s curated gallery of smaller, more indie-flavoured games. More than that, it was free, coming pre-installed on all Xbox 360 Pros (the ones with the removable hard drive). It was a taste of what was to come, introducing audiences not only to the idea of playing these kinds of smaller, less intense games on a console, but also the idea of purchasing and downloading them digitally. It was great and ground-breaking in equal measure.  

WipEout (PlayStation, 1995): I kinda missed the PlayStation generation. I was still, more or less, in my PC-centric “consoles are toys” mindset (which I wouldn’t fully shake off till the release of the N64). But I came to appreciate its qualities as a cool, exciting, super-fast futuristic racer. I’m pretty sure it’s not the first 3D hover-car racing game, but it was presented in such a groovy package that it ticket all the boxes, and helped show off just what the PlayStation was capable of in terms of its 3D graphics and CD sound. And, of course, it helped define the console as being a bit more edgy and grown-up than the previous Nintendo and Sega stalwarts. 

Super Mario Bros. (NES, 1988): what can be said about one of the most iconic games of all time? Mario Bros defined not only a console, not only a generation, but arguably an entire artform. Creating what we now know as a platform game, it expanded and surpassed the basic template of Donkey Kong into a roaming adventure, part twitch-gaming reaction test, part puzzle game. I played a lot of copycat games on my Amiga, but even then, as a whiny computer brat, I knew that Mario was better. Even when my cousins got a MegaDrive and Sonic, I knew – deep in my heart – that Mario was better. It's a deep game, an endlessly replayable game, a supremely fair game despite its difficulty. I think it’s hard to overstate just how good, or how influential, Mario was. 

Project Gotham Racing (Xbox, 2001): I tried hard to pick a different platform for every game in this list, but I couldn’t exclude PGR. This may be tied up with my biography a little bit, but my other half and I played this game to death. I never think of myself as a big racer fan, but every once in a while a title comes out that I just really, really get into – Jaguar XJ220 on the Amiga, Midtown Madness on PC, the Forza Horizon series nowadays – and PGR did that in spades. A gorgeous arcade racer, it was a great launch title to show off the sheer grunt of the Xbox; then, as now, the most powerful console on the market. It also offered a terrific four-player split-screen. But its Kudos feature – borrowed from semi-prequel Metropolis Street Racer – offered ways to win outside of sheer racing graft, awarding cool driving. I still love the original, and I kinda wish they’d bring back or reimagine its city-based driving for a future release or Forza spin-off. 

Lumines: Puzzle Fusion (PSP, 2004): okay, so this is a bit of a cheat as I've barely played the original PSP version, but Lumines is just phenomenal; the best moving-blocks-around game since Tetris, and probably the most influential one since then too (for the record, I've played it extensively on multiple other platforms). An excellent spin on a Tetris-a-like, its use of music and colour made it a beautiful, brilliant sensory experience. With Sony entering the handheld market, the PSP needed a USP, something vibrant and cool that suited a portable experience, and Lumines provided it in spades; also its funky visuals and music was a good fit for Sony’s brand.  

Well, that was fun, and a lot harder than I expected. If you’re enjoying a new console this Christmas, then hopefully you’ll have fun with one of the new launch titles too – even if I doubt any (apart from maybe Astro) would trouble a list like this in the future (although I do think The Falconeer looks all kinds of cool). 

#top ten #games #gaming #launch games #xbox series x #xbox series s #playstation 5 #nintendo #switch #halo #mario #zelda

[erin-gilberts]

Bc It’s such a good post will you answer all the cafe asks?

Yessss totally! 

Vanilla Chai Latte : Are you in love?

Yes, wholeheartedly and unapologetically, I am. 

My girlfriend and I have only been together for two months, but it’s one of those things where when you know, you know. I’ve been in relationships lasting upwards of a year where I still didn’t know at the end of them whether or not I was in love. Early on in the year, I was actually even having conversations with my mom about how I wasn’t sure I’d ever been in love; I had no concept of what that felt like. I didn’t feel like I was feeling what I was supposed to be in relationships. I wondered if I was aromantic and if I wasn’t meant to experience romantic love.

With her, I’ve realized everything love IS supposed to feel like, and I’ve realized I AM capable of feeling those feelings - I just hadn’t met the right person yet. My heart was waiting for her. 

We daydream of the life we intend to build together, and it delights me to be able to wake up every day and choose her, again and again, as we run boldly and breathlessly into the future we now share. We totally u-hauled but we’re both so committed to blooming and becoming together; it’s unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before despite having quite a bit of experience in relationships. 

Flat White : Coffee or Tea?

Coffee. It feels more substantial to me with more ways to customize it exactly how you like it. I also just have a lot of really positive memories being in coffee shops! I’m currently obsessing over Starbucks’s seasonal salted caramel mocha. 

Cappuccino : What’s your middle name?

Elizabeth! I was named after my mother and grandmother, so it’s the only part of my birth name I kept when I changed my name. 

Mocha : Dream Job?

A famous professional organizer on the same level as Marie Kondo and Dorothy Breininger! They’re my inspiration and the reason I went into this kind of work. Also, the executive director of my own LGBT-focused nonprofit (which I have been, and I intend to be again!). 

Pumpkin Spice : Dream car?

The super fancy bike I’ll use the day I ride in the AIDS LifeCycle? Haha, I don’t drive and I don’t intend to! 

Jasmine Tea : If you could go anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?

Ugh, if I could visit any place in the world right this moment, I’d choose to go back to Toronto in a heartbeat. I went there in 2015 for the Inside Out LGBT Film Festival and I LOVED that city. It was so fun and the people were so welcoming. Other than that? Moscow, because it’s where @googoogojob lives, or New York City, because I just learned Hook & Ladder 8 (the Ghostbusters firehouse) is a real place and I want to see it! 

Old English : You’re stranded on an island, who do you bring with you?

Do I have a limit?? If I have a choice, I’m definitely bringing my mom, brother, maternal grandparents, best friend, best friend’s family, cat, and girlfriend! That’s like the minimum amount of people in my life I couldn’t go without. 

Iced Chocolate : Do you have a crush on someone?

My girlfriend, who I continually redevelop a big gay crush on every day! But I feel like that’s not quite the spirit of what this question is asking, so - I also have a big gay crush on Kristen Wiig, which my girlfriend endlessly makes fun of me for! Like, to the point I named my cat Erin Gilbert. 

Caramel Frappe : Favorite video game?

It’s a tie between Minecraft and Undertale. I swing wildly between playing Minecraft daily to not playing for months, but it never gets old. The sandbox nature of the game enables infinite creativity, and the low stakes make it both accessible to me (not a gamer) and relaxing. And Undertale with its story and unique mechanics remains to this day the game to inspire the biggest emotional response in me. I’ve thought about having, “Despite everything, it’s still you” tattooed. 

Iced Lemon Tea : Favorite song/band?

My favorite songs of all time are “The Greatest” by Sia and “I Know a Place” by MUNA, both of which were written in the aftermath of the Pulse shooting and can be interpreted as the process of rediscovering queer joy at the same time your community is constantly faced with tragedy and pain. They hit hard in a beautiful way as a hate crime survivor. 

Iced Cafe Mocha : Favorite thing to do on rainy days?

I like to go out as soon as the storm passes and just walk downtown in the rain. The air always smells and feels so good; it clarifies me and I feel renewed. Walking in the light rain or before / after the storm always feels like breathing, really breathing, for the first time. It reminds me I exist and it reminds me that’s neat. 

Hot Chocolate : Are you an affectionate person?

Yessssss oh my god. I live and breathe being affectionate and not even in a strictly romantic sense. I’m naturally an exuberant person and I delight in making people happy. My girlfriend would also say I engage in “cat behavior” with my demands to be held or touching constantly. XD 

Caramel Macchiato : You’re travelling the entire world but you can only take one person with you. Who do you take?

My girlfriend @sweetmckinnon. Not only would we have the unprecedented opportunity to be gay in every country and continent, but we’re both writers, and we’d write an excellent book about these adventures! 

Green Tea : How tall are you?

5’7. 

Early Grey Tea : The inevitable Zombie Apocalypse is upon us! What’s your plan of action?

I’m rounding up everyone I care about and taking us to the nearest commune of marginalized people. We’ll be avoiding those uber-macho survivalist types like the plague, because their arrogance will 100% get everyone killed. At least marginalized communities would be more likely to understand working together and looking out for the community, not just yourself. 

Mint Tea : How do you relax?

Indoor cycling is my drug of choice. It’s HARD to be mad or stressed when you’re exerting that intensely. I might also write self-indulgent fanfics or indulge in a little controlled chaos (I’m an acrylic pour and collage artist). And talking to my girlfriend, best friend, or mom always makes me feel better, too. 

Vanilla Latte : Board games or drinking games?

I genuinely love board games and wish I had more people to play them with. 

Iced Coffee : Do you like reading? If so, what’s your favorite book?

I like reading, but having ADHD has made it extremely hard to read entire books in recent years. My favorite book is probably The Radium Girls by Kate Moore. The author takes what’s already a horrific story and a dark chapter in American history and with her devastating writing style, humanizes each woman involved to the point it makes you ache to read knowing the inevitability of their fate. Anytime anyone asks me for a book recommendation, this is the book I suggest. 

Italian Soda : Describe your dream date

My dream date would be after we’ve been together for a while - maybe on a date that’s special to us, like our anniversary, or maybe just on a random night because we feel like it, we have one of those super romantic dates like you see in the movies. We dress up super cute, go out to dinner and come home to a bedroom full of candles and rose petals on the floor, and every moment is spent just enjoying each other and what we have together in every way we can. <3 

Sparkling Water : Describe what qualities you look for in a person

Passion - I’m an activist who became the executive director of their own nonprofit at the age of 16. I’m not going to mesh with someone who’s just going through the motions of life without any aspirations. 

Flexibility - It’s a turnoff for me when someone is EXTREMELY committed to a very specific view of how their life is going to be. It tells me right away I’m going to have to continually contort myself to fit into their unbending path, because I accept I can’t predict the direction of my life with any degree of precision and I’m not rigid about it as a result. 

Creative - I’m currently dating another writer and it’s the most fun I’ve ever had in a relationship. The quickest way to get us to pop off into a spirited debate is to get us started about story structure and characterization. We. Go. OFF. And could go off for days. Our shared creative passion gives us endless ground to connect and bond on. 

Those are just a few, but definitely a few important ones for me! 

Orange Juice : Have you ever had a valentine?

My first girlfriend, who I dated from 12-17, is the only valentine I’ve ever had. The timing of my relationships as an adult has never worked out for me to be partnered on Valentine’s Day. We weren’t super out about our relationship at the time and didn’t spend Valentine’s Day together, but I still have the love letters she sent me copied into my 7th grade diary, and I still have the antique gold heart necklace with enamel roses she gave me one year, too! Lots of lovely memories from that relationship. 

Rose Hip Tea : Describe your first kiss

My first girlfriend and I were 12-13, cutting class in the bathroom because she was often bullied for her sexuality. She was having an especially rough day that day and I knew exactly where to find her. She kissed me out of the blue while I was comforting her and in all of my baby gay naivety, I hadn’t fully realized I was gay or that she liked me that way prior to that. Turns out I was and she did. We dated for five years. 

Herbal Tea : You’re at a candle shop, what scented candle do you buy?

Oh, I’m going right to the bakery scent section. I’m not a huge fan of chocolate-scented candles, but vanilla? Christmas cookies? Gingerbread? Sign me the FUCK up. 

Sandalwood is also one of my favorite scents, but depending on what it’s blended with, it can be hit or miss for me in candles. 

[hellzyeahthewebwieldingavenger]

Superior Spider-Man #17-19, 23, 27-32 and Superior Team-Up #5, #7 Thoughts...Sorta

Because of the 2099 event coming up I have ambitions (and lord knows if I will succeed) of re-reading the 2099 centric stories published in the 2010s, chiefly Peter David’s Spider-Man 2099 solo-books. I never actually finished reading that stuff nor did I finish writing posts for each issue/arc but I’m willing to try again.

It’s been so long though and now the stuff has been collected I thought it’d be best to not simply pick up where I left off but both refresh my memory and be more of a completionist about it.

Hence I decided to skim  the Superior issues featuring Miguel O’Hara and to a lesser extent Alchemax with a mind towards the scenes featuring both. This is both to save me time (no pun intended) and because you know...fuck Superior.

As such this is far from comprehensive and I’m likely missing information but for the sake of completion I’m making these posts.

So first of all I’m not going to overly critique the inherent concept of Superior, Otto’s characterization, or anyone else’s characterization (sans 2099 relevant characters); especially as they relate to the Superior concept. It’s shit. I’ve said that endlessly before. If you are chomping at the bit to hear specifics regarding these issues then all I shall say is Slott writes Otto as cartoonish with Saturday Morning style villain dialogue whilst Yost in Team-Up, just like virtually EVERY writer sans Slott to handle the character, did better.

NO ONE hearing Otto talk as Spider-Man should be fooled into thinking he’s the real Spider-Man because he doesn’t sound anything like he did before he changed his outfit, started using more violent methods, employed supervillains as part of his Superior Six, had 4 metal arms come out of his back and had a hold gang of henchmen at his beck and call. But in spite of that at least Yost’s dialogue was more nuanced. Whilst it sounds like something Otto would say it also sounds like the Peter Parker Spider-Man merely skewed. He’s more condescending, egotistical and bluntly insulting than Peter ever was but he also doesn’t sound like a middle aged man from a 1960s comic book.

This brings us to the dialogue in general in fact. As a fan of the MC2 universe and older comics I ENJOY older style dialogue...in MC2 stories or older comics. The MC2 universe was it’s own off to the side sandbox that was deliberately trying to evoke the Silver Age, but it could break from that when appropriate. And older comics were just written by the standards of the time. Slott though his dialogue was written if anything in a more antiquated style than what the MC2 usually went for. Seriously all he’d need is to throw in some old fashioned words and social attitudes and it’d be ripped from the 1960s.

In a mainstream, main universe set title the dialogue style should be reflective of the times, whilst obviously avoiding the bad stuff regarding modern dialogue. One of my frustrations with many modern comics is that characters will speak outloud because modern standards dictate that thought balloons for anyone who isn’t the lead character of the story are bad for some asinine reason. On that front I do give Slott credit as he avoids this. He has no problem giving any character he wants internal thoughts and even still makes the lead, Otto, stand out as he has thought captions not thought balloons like everyone else. It’s just literally the word choices he makes that’s the problem. It’s inorganic even by comic book standards and is overly exposition laden. This is where editorial boxes or the recap pages could help out by getting that exposition out of the way. But instead we need to explain a story from over 20 issues earlier twice across 2 issues or alternatively just take it on faith the reader remembers the stories.

It doesn’t help that he inconsistently will use the third person narrator once in a blue moon.

The dialogue also impacts upon the characterization because frankly Miguel and Tyler Stone are...off...

In fact a lot of the characters besides Otto feel rather bland and samey because they are just actors in the plot that is being told and nothing more. Miguel is distinct for little reason beyond his use of future slang. Now I’ve only read the first trade of Spider-Man 2099 so maybe some of these terms pop up later but if Slott invented ‘bithead’ and ‘jammit’ it’s cause for cringe. The larger issue though is that Miguel’s status quo is set up by Slott but not his you know...personality. Okay in fairness he gets across Miguel has a little bit more edge to him than the regular Spider-Man and is not as prone to the same kind of humour in battle. But the latter is likely less Slott getting the character and more him just writing him pretty generically. The sarcasm, the arrogance, the sardonic aspect of Miguel is totally absent.

This is a problem if you were a 2099 fan showing up to see your fav or if this was intended as set up for a spin-off which it absolutely was. I mean shouldn’t set up for a spin-off character give you an impression of their personality. Shouldn’t you want to follow the character as opposed to the admittedly interesting situation the character is in?

But that’s Slott all over. He’s awful on characters 99% of the time but he’s good on concepts 50% of the time. The initial 2099 arc is a great microcosm of this.

Miguel wants to avert Alchemax’s evil influence in the future but we are merely TOLD that it is evil but see little evidence to corroborate that. He is willing to destroy himself, his grandfather and his family lineage to do that but then he has a change of heart. The set up for that change of heart is briefly presented and we smash cut to after it has already happened, we see none of the internal gears turning to demonstrate his mind changing, not even a quick panel of his eyes narrowing or his brow furrowing.

O the flipside (again no pun intended) though I genuinely adore the idea that Liz Allan and Norman Osborn in effect founded Alchemax and the involvement of Tiberius Stone and the conundrum of Miguel needing to protect him. In fact Tiberius comes off as one of the more interesting characters in this. I liked how he deduced his own relevance to the future and was just a sleazy asshole.

Another thing compromising the introduction of Miguel is his presentation.

The arc is rather bewildering because it introduces functionally an alternate version of the original Spider-Man 2099 but also takes it on faith you already know about Spider-Man 2099 in the first place.

Which frankly wasn’t a reasonable presumption.

Like okay sure people know OF Spider-Man 2099 because if you are a comic book or Spider-Man fan long enough your pick up there was a future version of him sooner or later, it’s just plain osmosis. And he’d been featured in two video games in the then recent past.

But not everyone plays video games, watches Let’s Plays, or would have read comics from 20 years ago, especially considering the 2099 stories haven’t even been collected in trade yet. Hell the last time A version of Spidey 2099 appeared it was in 2009 and was a distinctly different version altogether.

So Miguel’s reintroduction should’ve been handled differently, the first shot of him in action should have been the Stegman splash page not him preparing to leap off into action, we should’ve seen his supervision in action instead of just being told about it, we should’ve had his other abilities demonstrated to us. I mean I  know what they are and how they work for the most part but how would someone who’s a new/unfamiliar fan have a clue?

Perhaps the worst example of this is the fact that Slott’s stories, both in the initial 2099 arc and later, reference Miguel and Peter meeting before. There is no further exposition, there is no editorial caption referring to when this occurred (in the initial arc anyway), you are just supposed to accept this has happened before. That is until Superior #32 but more on that in a moment.

But even for new readers this is bewildering. Newer fans might in their head’s wonder if this is referencing the Edge of Time or the Shattered Dimensions video games, which it definitely isn’t because those are clearly not canon to Peter Parker. Older fans like myself might immediately jump to the Spider-Man Meets Spider-Man 2099 one shot from the mid 1990s. But that’s never explicitly referred to until Superior #32 which was published not just after Superior wrapped up but in fact after Miguel’s solo-book had been launched!

More confusingly  IIRC the one shot factors into the original 2099 series so it shouldn’t apply to this alternate version of Miguel and indeed the marvel.wiki lists the one shot as featuring the original Miguel NOT the one starring in these stories. Much like Spider-Girl #10 Slott decided to canonize something he had no business canonizing.

Anyway one final little criticism I have of these stories in terms of writing is that Miguel helped create Spider Slayers using future technology (why would you fuck up the timeline like that??????) and he was able to deduce Otto wasn’t the true Spider-Man. How the fuck can a guy from the future who met Peter Parker ONCE and very briefly tell Superior Spidey is an imposter but Aunt May, Kaine and Mary Jane can’t?

Because contrivance thy name is Slott.

Let’s briefly discuss Superior Team up and Superior #32.

Miguel’s involvement is essentially meaningless in the former and he’s absent from the latter but credit where credit is due Slott did give us a fun little jaunt through the 2099 future...which is not the setting of Miguel O’Hara’s solo book so you know...that was kind of pointless beyond setting up Spider-Worst (not my joke but it’s appropriate). I have little else to say on the issue beyond that seeing more murdered Spider-Heroes sickens me.

Finally let’s talk art.

These books were drawn by Ryan Stegman (Superior #17-19), Marco Checchetto (Superior Team-Up), Humberto Ramos (Superior #23) and Giuseppe Camuncoli (Superior #27.NOW, #28-31).

Ramos is Ramos which is to say anatomically offensive though seeing him briefly draw Miguel wasn’t too bad. Camuncoli was better but I’ve never liked his style. True he got better but still not great.

Stegman meanwhile I think was good. Now this is 2013 Stegman. His RYV, Venom and Absolute Carnage work runs rings around his work back then and before that. It’s very stylized but it’s still good. In fact the stylized look of it works for the concept behind the series. Characters look darker, edgier, in a way uglier and somewhat caricatured which fits in a series about a villain. His double page spread for Miguel though looks awesome, one of the all time great images of the character.

Checchetto meanwhile was the stand out. His work just look gorgeous to look at but it was still evoking a darker aesthetic it fit the idea of a book about a villain very, very well.

Not much to say about these issues. I am debating if I’m going to make a similar multi-issue post when I skim through the Miguel parts of Spider-Verse since I never posted about them back when it was happening, but we will see.

So I recommend reading these?

No. No I do not. I recommend flipping to the pages of Miguel in costume and looking at the art but that’s it.

#Spider-Man 2099 #2099 Thoughts #Miguel O'Hara #Peter Parker #otto octavius #Dan Slott #superior spider-man #Doc Ock #doctor octopus #Ryan Stegman #Chris Yost #Spider-Verse #marco checchetto #Giuseppe Camuncoli #Marvel 2099

[13eyond13]

8.21.19

I’m seeing a bit of stuff going around lately that suggests other fans are being condescending because they prefer the manga to the anime, and I’m not 100% sure because nobody’s talked to me about it directly, but I can’t help but wonder if some of my recent more opinionated posts about this might have contributed to that feeling in the fandom for some people. So I’m just going to explain myself a little better here, because I definitely don’t want to hurt feelings or make other fans feel bad about their enjoyment of Death Note or the anime or their personal interpretations of things!

I felt the need to specify more clearly that I prefer to usually go by the manga only for things now because I’ve been receiving an unusually large amount of meta asks on anon the past month or so, mostly about basic things in the series and straight-forward interpretations of events and characterizations. This led me to assume that there must be a lot of new fans trickling in who are not already immersed in the fandom. They probably aren't aware of the general consensus or inside jokes about most things, and they might not know what is actually canon and what is just fanon, nor what was changed when the manga was adapted to the anime. This makes me have to carefully consider which source to draw from when I am answering these questions and attempting to explain things to the best of my ability to a person who is genuinely asking me to give them insight into the source material and the fandom's views. When doing this I found that 98% of the time or more I was always defaulting to the manga for everything, not only because it's the original source but because I think it's the best version of the story and the characters. But I wasn’t sure if the people asking me questions would actually KNOW that I was basing my ideas of the characters and plot off the manga instead of the anime.

I imagine the anime is probably the most popular way for people to be introduced to Death Note, and that’s for a very good reason, it’s extremely good and I do love it very much! SO much of my idea of L is based around AJ’s voice acting, and it’s a super enjoyable watch that for the most part sticks pretty darn close to the events in the manga as well. I didn’t mean to come off like I was trashing it or trashing people who prefer it or who haven't read the manga by saying that I take issue with certain changes the anime made throughout to the themes or the characters or their interactions. I just have to make a lot of assumptions when getting asks from people whose identities I have no clue about, and sometimes this leads to me having to air my more opinionated thoughts publicly about everything in order to avoid having to clarify this stuff every time I answer an ask. Normally I wouldn’t want to split hairs like this at all, I really like them both, but I do think that there are significant enough differences between the two sources that it warrants me mentioning this for people who are genuinely new to things and trying to learn stuff from someone who has been nerding out about it for way too long already.

That’s all, and I do apologize if I came off short or condescending or made anyone feel bad at any point. I’ve been a bit overworked lately and I think this made me more blunt and impatient sometimes than I usually am as well. I do love the fandom a lot and all the creative takes and ways of engaging with it I see around, and my blog is a testament to that. I think DN is a wonderful sandbox to play in and extremely versatile for fans, and I don’t mean to imply everyone must stick to manga canon or else suffer the wrath of the uppity meta writer who is going through everything with a fine tooth comb, haha. I’ve made TONS of posts and writing and drawings and such myself that most definitely aren’t manga accurate whatsoever, and it would be silly to insist that it’s the only way to enjoy or interpret the series or the characters. I just want to be clear as possible when answering the more standard asks, and I think my interest in DN has mostly switched over to studying the manga very closely now as well. But I don’t think that’s what everyone else has to be doing by any means.

#p #long post #fandom #meta

[thinkingaboutyoungroyals]

Tyrus Month: Wedding

Renewal Of Vows (AO3)

A/N: This is the last of the prompts for Tyrus Month and I just want to say how much fun it was to participate! I know I didn't do all of the prompts due to my own busy life schedule but I'm so thankful to everyone who took the time to read and enjoy what I've put out!I'm looking forward to what else this show has in store for us!

It was a warm sunny day. The sun was shining. The birds were singing. The kids were out playing. And Cyrus and TJ were on the playground swinging.

The two friends talked about everything and nothing, at the same time.

TJ talked about his summer math tutoring. Cyrus relayed ideas for his future screenplays. TJ narrated stories about the kids at work. Cyrus shared his anxiety about the upcoming school year, as he was finally entering high school.

“High school is a completely different territory from middle school,” Cyrus ranted as he kicked his legs in the air to gain a little more height (just a little). “The halls are probably more crowded and the classes are harder and the social status quo is stricter! I don’t know if I’ll survive!”

On the swing next to him, TJ let out a chuckle. “I can definitely attest to the crowded hallways. There are a lot of tall seniors and they’ll just push past you to get to class. If you need a bodyguard, I’ll volunteer.”

Cyrus blushed. In the two years he had known TJ, the older boy always seemed to say the sappiest things. Considering he was, at one time, a scary-basketball-guy to Cyrus, the younger couldn’t seem to get used to his flirtatiousness. He often wondered if the athlete’s words meant more than simple playfulness.

Sometimes, he even allowed himself to hope that his feelings for the older boy were reciprocated.

“Oh, look at that,” TJ’s voice broke through his thoughts.

Cyrus slowed his swinging and shifted his head in the direction the other boy was pointing at.

A group of kids were gathered around a little girl and a little boy standing side-by-side, their arms linked. They were standing by the sandbox and little girl was holding a bunch of flowers they probably pulled from one of the beds around the playground. In front of them was another little boy, holding a book upside down.

“Awww, they’re having a playground wedding,” Cyrus realized, a smile on his face. “I remember having one of those.”

At that, TJ chuckled again. “You married someone on a playground?” he asked, genuinely amused.

Up ahead of them, the two kids exchanged candy rings.

“Yeah.” Cyrus began to reminisce. “It was back in kindergarten. I was the new kid and I didn’t really have any friends yet. But there was this one kid who played with me and one day, he asked me to marry him on the playground." He let out a soft chuckle. "That should have clued me in that I was gay when I didn’t see anything wrong with it and said ‘yes’.”

“Awww, that’s cute,” TJ said, his lips quirked into an amused smile as he kept swinging. “Who was it?”

The memory of a blonde-haired kid with pretty blue eyes and played dinosaurs with him on the sandbox floated in Cyrus' memory. The other boy had proposed with a blueberry ring pop and another kid married them in front of all their plastic dinosaur toys.

“His name was Tyler," Cyrus narrated. "He was so cool. But, a week later, he moved and I never saw him again.”

He remembered being so upset when Tyler didn’t show up to school after that and then his teacher told him that he had moved. That was probably his first time experiencing heartbreak yet he didn’t even realize.

Meanwhile, beside him, TJ had dragged his feet on the ground as his head swiveled to Cyrus. His eyes were wide with shock and disbelief.

Cyrus furrowed his brows. “What?”

“Where did you go to kindergarten?”

Odd question but okay. “Maple Heights Nursery and Kindergarten. Why?”

TJ swallowed. “I went there too. When I was 6, my dad got a new job and we moved. Then, when I was 9, he lost his job and we had to move back here.”

Cyrus smiled, excitedly. “Really? Wow! Maybe we were in the same class!”

The older boy managed a smile. “Before we moved, though, I also married this kid on the playground. But I can’t remember his name. I felt so guilty for not telling him I was moving. But, I remember that I really liked him ‘cause he was fun to play with. And, he had a mole on his cheek… like you.”

It took Cyrus a moment for TJ’s words to sink in. And when they did, his eyes were wide and his words were caught in his throat.

“Do you know my full name, Underdog?” TJ asked.

Cyrus swallowed and shook his head.

“Tyler Joseph Kippen. People didn’t start calling me TJ until the first grade because there were three Tylers in my class and it just stuck.”

Cyrus’ breath hitched. “T-Tyler? Y-You're... Tyler?”

TJ smiled. “Hi, husband.”

His heart fluttered. “B-But… your hair… and your eyes… they’re different.”

TJ shrugged. “Hair got darker. Eyes changed color, I guess.”

Cyrus’ mind was blank at that point and all he could seem to do was look at TJ. As in, really look at him, trying to find glimpses of his kindergarten husband. Granted, his memory of the time was hazy since he was only 5 back then and TJ had changed a lot. He still felt skeptical.

TJ must have sensed his skepticism as he added, “I proposed to you with a blueberry ring pop and I kissed your nose. And I told you that when we grew up, I would marry you for real and we will have a house with a giant swimming pool and-.”

“And a dolphin named Flipper,” Cyrus finished, bits of the memory coming back.

TJ smiled. “We still have a lot of growing up to do but I don’t think we can have that dolphin.”

Cyrus felt himself glare. “You left me.”

TJ’s smile dropped. “I’m sorry.”

“I can’t believe you didn’t remember my name! Or me!”

“I remembered you! I just suck at names!”

Cyrus huffed. “What kind of husband just leaves his husband without saying goodbye?! You should make it up to me!”

“Okay, I will. Anything you want.”

“Good. You should marry me again,” Cyrus said, absentmindedly before his words registered and the horror sunk in. “No, wait, that’s not what I-.”

“Okay.”

Cyrus blinked. “Okay?”

TJ was grinning as he got on his feet and walked in front of Cyrus’ swing. “Where do you want it? Here in the swings or over by the sandbox like old times?”

“TJ, I was kidding.”

“I’m not. Because I like you, Cyrus.”

Cyrus blinked again. And again. And again.

He heard the words. He could comprehend the words. But those words only existed in his dreams. Surely, no way in real life did TJ just confess his feelings to him… right?

His silence made TJ’s smile falter. “If… If you don’t feel the same way, then you can forget what I said. I can buy you baby taters and a milkshake if you want.”

But, he did. Cyrus liked TJ. He liked him a lot.

“H-Here,” he managed.

It was TJ’s turn to blink and stare, blankly.

“I-I… want the wedding here,” Cyrus continued. “And… I like you too, TJ. I like you a lot.”

That was all it took for TJ to take Cyrus’ hand and pull him off the swing and into a tight hug. Cyrus’ heart was beating faster than ever and he felt his head swirling with so many emotions that he couldn’t say another word.

Because not only was TJ ended up being Tyler, his childhood husband, he also liked Cyrus back.

He liked Cyrus back!

“So… about that wedding…”

Cyrus briefly pulled away from the hug and beamed. “Don’t you worry. I have it all planned.”

The wedding march blared out of Andi’s smartphone and she was kind of glad that they had chosen a late afternoon when most kids and their parents were not around to witness this or else they would be getting so many strange looks.

She couldn’t believe that she actually agreed to spend one of her summer days at the swing set of the children’s playground, a small notebook in her hands, and watching Cyrus and TJ walk down a pretend aisle towards her, their “minister”.

Buffy was next to her, acting as witness and ring bearer. She had not stopped rolling her eyes since the “ceremony” began.

“Is this really for real?” her athletic friend whispered. “So they found out they were each other’s kindergarten husbands. Do they have to get married again?”

Andi chuckled. “It’s a renewal of their vows since they found each other again.”

“But…” Buffy trailed off when the two reached them.

Cyrus was practically vibrating with excitement and TJ had the softest look on his face that the two girls had never seen before. How their friend managed to get the normally cool and serious jock to agree to this, was a total mystery. The two's entire relationship was still a bizarre mystery to them, but at this point, they knew Cyrus was happy. Who were they to get in the way of that?

Andi cleared her throat as she opened the notebook that Cyrus had prepared for her and began to read. “Friends and… well, friends, we are gathered here today to witness the renewal of vows between Cyrus Goodman and… Tyler Joseph Kippen?”

She looked up at the two boys in confusion but both nodded so she continued. “Do you, Cyrus Goodman, take Tyler Joseph Kippen, as your playground husband, again, to have and to hold, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health? Wait, where’s the ‘til death do you part?”

“That’s a little too morbid for a playground wedding so I got rid of it,” Cyrus answered. “And, yes, I do.”

Andi pursed her lips. “Okay then. And do you, Tyler Joseph Kippen-.”

“Yeah, I do,” interrupted the older boy.

Andi flashed him a glare for the interruption and was surprised at herself for actually taking her position as minister, seriously. “Okay then.” She quickly scanned the next part of the instructions, raising her eyebrow at the ridiculousness of it. “Buffy? The rings, please.”

With a resigned sigh, Buffy stepped forward and handed her two packs of ring pops.

“Which flavors do either of you want?” Andi asked the two boys. “There’s blueberry and green apple.”

“I’ll take the blueberry,” Cyrus said with a knowing smile at TJ.

“Green apple for me then.”

So, Andi gave the blueberry to TJ and the green apple to Cyrus. She and Buffy watched as the two opened the packs and slipped the candy into each other’s fingers.

“By the power vested in me by… well, Cyrus,” Andi continued and she couldn’t help her smile at the next line. “I now pronounce you playground husbands, again. You may now kiss.”

Grinning, Cyrus closed his eyes. TJ leaned down and pecked his nose.

Andi resisted the urge to squeal because no matter how absurd this pretend wedding was and they were getting way too old for these games, it was still so darn cute.

Cyrus opened his eyes, beaming at his new boyfriend slash husband.

“I… kinda want our first kiss to be a little less… public,” TJ said, side-eyeing Andi and Buffy who were still watching them closely.

The younger boy let out a giggle before reaching into his pocket and throwing a plastic bottle on the ground before stepping on it.

“I’d step on glass but it’s a hazard to the children and I don’t want to clean it up,” he stated at everyone’s questioning faces before picking up the plastic bottle again. “It’s the symbolism that counts. So… Reception at The Spoon?”

“Finally!” Buffy exclaimed. “You two are so weird but… congrats.” She sent a glare at TJ. “Don’t hurt him, Kippen.”

The older boy chuckled. “Wouldn’t dream of it, Driscoll.”

Hand-in-hand, the two led the way to the diner, their intertwined hands swinging between them.

Meanwhile, Andi and Buffy were still standing together, staring at them and unable to believe that they actually just did that.

“Well… that was a lovely ceremony,” Andi stated.

“He better not hurt Cyrus or I'll hurt him,” Buffy said with a secret fond smile.

“Come on, we both know TJ wouldn’t do that to Cyrus. His crush was so obvious! Can’t believe it took him remembering Cyrus in kindergarten for him to make a move.”

Buffy sighed. “I guess. Anyway, they promised us free taters and milkshakes. So, let’s go!”

Arm-in-arm, the two girls followed after the happy new couple.

#tyrus #tyrus month #tyrus month 2018 #tyrus week #tyrus week 2018

[themyskira]

Wonder Woman #50 postmortem: “You know how strident Wonder Woman fans can be”

I want to cap off my readthrough of this unmitigated shitshow with a look at a recent interview James Robinson did with Newsarama, reflecting back on his twenty-issue Wonder Woman run.

I’m doing this for two reasons: One, because having read the full run and formed my own impressions (and, dare I say, some rather strident opinions), I genuinely do think it can be interesting to see what the writer has to say about it, what they were trying to achieve with it and, looking back, how they feel about the run.

And two, because having read what Robinson has to say, HOOBOY, I HAVE A FEW THOUGHTS OF MY OWN.

Newsarama: James, the one through-line of your entire run is Wonder Woman's twin brother, Jason. I know he was the motivation for you working on this book. Did you know the whole story before you started? Or did this story evolve as you wrote it?

James Robinson: I knew to a degree. As you said, I was specifically asked to pay off the gigantic plot point that Geoff Johns had left at the end of "Darkseid War." So it was always part of my plan.

Are. You. FUCKING. KIDDING ME.

The entire premise of this run. The wholesale derailment of Wondy’s Rebirth story. The rampant shredding of her newly-established Rebirth backstory. Sidelining Diana for the better part of a year in favour of a repulsive twin brother and some shit with Darkseid.

ALL OF THAT.

Served no wider purpose.

Was not intended to build towards some Rebirth metaplot or contribute to an overarching Justice League story.

Was mandated, in fact, for no other reason than that Geoff motherfucking Johns wanted to TIE UP A DANGLING PLOT THREAD FROM TWO-YEAR-OLD CROSSOVER.

He goes on.

Originally, I was going to be on it for a shorter period of time. I had originally planned to be on it for about eight issues, I think. And then when I was getting the twice-monthly book in on time (which is tough; they really beat you up), they asked me to stay on.

There are better, more eloquent arguments against the fortnightly publishing schedule — which is incredibly punishing for creators and prioritises quantity ahead of quality — but none, perhaps, are more simple or succinct than James Robinson got to write twenty issues of Wonder Woman because he got his scripts in on time.

And that gave me more time to develop Jason and play with him more.

I was careful to make sure it wasn't only about Jason, however. I was already getting crap from social media about how this is Wonder Woman's book and she should be the center of attention at all time. You know how strident Wonder Woman fans can be.

Well, that’s an interesting and thoroughly disingenuous interpretation of the critique.

The criticism was not that Wondy must be “the centre of attention at all times”, and therefore Robinson was wrong to spend any time developing any character other than her.

It was that Robinson turned Diana into such a passive, reactive — and, frankly, incompetent — character that she became barely necessary to the story at all. You could remove her from most of the issues in the Darkseid arc without affecting the progression of the plot at all, because she never does anything.

Yes, I got irate when Diana would routinely show up in six or seven pages of an issue, if she appeared at all. Funny thing, when I pick up a book titled Wonder Woman, I expect to occasionally see some actual WONDER WOMAN.

But that was the symptom rather than the problem. Because even when Diana was on the page, she was absent from the story.

And part of this is also about the characters Robinson chose to focus on instead of Wondy: Jason, Grail and Darkseid. Three characters that a lot of fans weren’t interested in, didn’t like and frankly resented having shoehorned into Wondy’s story. True, Robinson may have been asked to include them in the story, but it was his choice to prioritise them over Diana, and it was his writing that shaped Jason into such an odious character (something he confirms in the interview: Johns came up with the idea, he says, but “Most of who the character is now is stuff that I've actually come up with.”)

Put it this way: I didn’t see anybody complaining in December 2016 when Greg Rucka devoted an entire issue to Barbara Minerva’s backstory, did you?

But oh, I’m sorry, was that too strident for you?

Nrama: During your run, you tied into several events that were going on elsewhere in the DC Universe. Even this current story arc ties into Dark Nights: Metal and involves the Justice League. Was that a goal, to make Jason part of the greater DCU?

Robinson: Yes. I always do that stuff, though. I always try to tie into bigger stories. Whether it was my stuff at DC or what I did at Marvel, like Fantastic Four and Invaders and what-not, I always enjoy that about comic book universes. I like when writers try to embrace the whole place.

Here’s the thing about this.

I like the sandbox nature of a shared universe. I’m not a fan of event tie-ins, which have a tendency to derail the stories of individual books in order to aggressively market some company-wide crossover that I couldn’t care less about, but I like that there’s this whole wider world of heroes and villains and settings and mythologies that writers can draw on and play with. And you can tell some really cool stories out of the collision of those different mythologies and characters — think Phil Jimenez’s ‘Gods of Gotham’, for instance, where the Wonderfam and the Batfam are forced to team up when some of Batman’s most powerful rogues are possessed by Ares’ children.

That’s not the way Robinson loops the wider DCU into his stories, or at least it wasn’t in Wonder Woman.

Robinson goes for insider references, often obscure ones, of the sort that will only make sense to people who’ve been reading the same comics as him over the past three decades.

In WW #33, he introduced and then immediately killed off a rebooted version of the Atomic Knights in a four-page sequence that added nothing to the plot.

In WW #42, he featured a flashback to Jason fighting the Deep Six, a group of Jack Kirby villains. Ostensibly this is framed as a set-up by Grail to orchestrate her first meeting with Jason, but Robinson milks it to crack jokes about Kirby’s 1970s dialogue — and if you’re not familiar with the characters (as I wasn’t), their inclusion makes little sense.

In the same issue, Robinson also works in the Wild Huntsman… apparently for no other reason than to amuse himself… and again, if you don’t know who he is, you’ll have no idea why Grail is trying so hard to kill him or why you should care.

And then there’s the Metal tie-in.

Like I said, I don’t like event tie-ins, but it is possible to make them work. G. Willow Wilson’s Ms Marvel has been looped into a number of crossover events over the course of its life, and while I’d prefer that clusterfucks like Civil War II stayed the hell away from Kamala and her pals, Wilson has done an effective job of using these events as a springboard for some really interesting personal conflicts and character work. There’s no extra required reading for these stories; she gives you everything you need to know, so those who aren’t following the event aren’t at a disadvantage.

Robinson gives you nothing.

This is how he links the Dark Gods’ story into Metal:

Diana [narration]: Could I really have summoned this? When we wielded the Tenth Metal against Barbatos, it had the ability to wish thoughts into reality.* Ed. note: * See Dark Nights: Metal #6! — Chris

And a couple of pages later —

Karnell [narration]: ...our beautiful world — which you regard as the ‘Dark Multiverse’ — we see as a paradise… where we were more than even gods to our worshippers… we were everything!

I didn’t read Metal and I’m not planning to. That’s not a value judgement, it’s just not something that sparks my interest.

But it means I don’t know who the bloody hell Barbatos is, and I’ve never heard of the Tenth Metal. I don’t know what the Dark Multiverse is, or how it works, or how it differs from the regular multiverse. When Robinson says Diana made an inadvertent wish while she was wielding this Tenth Metal, I don’t know if he’s picking up on a story point in Metal that I need to read up on.

So right off the bat, Robinson has alienated anybody who isn’t familiar with the event comic he’s drawing from.

And what infuriates me is that at the same time as he was doing all this, Robinson was getting muddled by Wonder Woman’s continuity, conflating superseded New 52 canon with (contradictory) Rebirth canon, inadvertently retconning things and failing even to keep his own narrative consistent. I’d argue he needed to spend less time making references to other comics and more time making sure he understood the one he was writing.

Robinson: [...] what I've always loved about Wonder Woman is her strength. Even when she was in that phase in the white costume, where she didn't have her powers, she had great strength.

Oh, you mean this era?

The era where Diana lost not only her powers, but all of her training and skills? Where she became a weepy, insecure romantic heroine, reliant on men to guide and save her from her own inexperience and her uncontrollable female emotionality? The era where she was constantly crying over her latest rugged love interests? That awesome era?

(Also misogynistic, racist and homophobic as fuuuuuck, but that’s another discussion.)

One of the reasons that era ended was because Gloria Steinham [sic] said, "Hey, she's Wonder Woman! She's a superhero and you've taken away her powers!"

But I actually thought her lacking powers was like saying, I don't need them to be a strong woman. And I think that was almost a more powerful message. I was surprised Ms. Steinem didn't get that, to be quite honest with you.

This is a characterisation of Steinem’s role in that period of Wondy’s history that I’ve seen before (always from men in the comics field), and it’s never sit well with me. It carries an unpleasant shade of gatekeeping.

The implication is that Steinem’s feelings about Wonder Woman (a character had loved since childhood) were less valid or even flat-out incorrect because she hadn’t read the right comics, that she was an ignorant outsider who ruined a good thing by coming in with a political agenda and trying to make Wonder Woman about feminism, that she didn’t have a right to complain about the comic because she wasn’t a ‘real’ fan.

And what Robinson doesn’t mention, as critics of Steinem and Ms. Magazine’s lobbying for a return to the classic Wondy rarely do, is that this campaign was set against a backdrop of unimpressive sales numbers and a struggle over the new direction that eventually gave rise to an ambitious and quite likely divisive ‘women’s lib’ arc written by African-American sci-fi writer Samuel R. Delany, which was intended to culminate in Diana triumphing over a group of male thugs attempting to shut down an abortion clinic run by women surgeons.

I have no doubt that Steinem played an important role in the way events panned out, but I’m also not surprised the ‘women’s lib’ arc never made it past its first issue.

(It was a truly dreadful first issue, btw, though the whole story behind it and what Delany was trying to do with it is fascinating.)

But that didn’t stop DC from kicking off Wondy’s superpowered return with the murder of a composite character representing Steinem and female DC editor Dorothy Woolfolk (whose name had previously been floated as editor for the book).

Then as now, Steinem got blamed by the gatekeepers for daring to interfere with Wonder Woman.

Nrama: Do you think Jason picked up some of her strength over the course of his story arc during your run?

Robinson: I think so, at least at the beginning as he was starting to develop. Now, technically, I suppose he's more powerful than her in that he has the power of their father Zeus and the power of storms and air control and things like that.

I like the fact that when he's given this armor, he realizes that his sister should have gotten it.

And he knows that the powers he has do not make him the better hero.

He knows his sister is the better hero.

So by the end of it, he just wants to be worthy of her, which I think was a nice character arc for him.

I can see how Robinson tried to achieve this character arc, but I wouldn’t call it anything close to a success.

Jason started as a deeply, deeply unlikeable character. He’s deeply selfish and emotionally immature. He doesn’t think about the consequences of his actions, mostly because he’s only ever concerned about how things affect him. When he learns about the mother he never met, when his adoptive father vanishes, every time Hercules leaves on one of his journeys, as he follows his twin sister’s heroics through the media — his thoughts are never about them and what they’re doing, or how they’re feeling, or if they’re okay. It’s always about how they’ve failed him, wronged him, abandoned him.

When we first meet him, he is helping goddamn Darkseid to systematically murder his own siblings. And it’s not because he’s being mind-controlled, or elaborately manipulated into believing that Darkseid is the good guy. It’s because he hates the guts out of Diana, the sister he’s never met, because he believes he’s entitled to the life that she has, and he wants to kill her for it.

If you want to get your readers past all that, you need one hell of a redemptive arc, and that’s one thing Jason never gets.

Because what happens next, after Jason gets an attack of conscience and switches sides, is that he freeloads off Diana, trashes her house, guilt trips her when she tries to set boundaries, and then when, heroism and glory don’t immediately come easily to him, runs away from home in the middle of the night.

The next time we see him is when he returns with the armour and a personality change. He’s still inexperienced, brash, impulsive and annoying, but that’s more or less the extent of it — he’s no longer the thoroughly objectionable character we saw in his first seven issues, and there’s no real explanation for the change.

Really, the vast majority of Jason’s character development takes place in the space between his disappearing at the end of WW #40 and reappearing at the end of WW #41.

Nrama: Wonder Woman #50 definitely feels like it's an ending to your time on Jason's character, and even his time in the book.

Robinson: It definitely has an element of finality to it, but Jason can be there for other writers, or indeed me, if I ever got to write him again.

Excuse me? If you ever got to what now?

Nrama: Is that a hint?

Robinson: I do enjoy writing him. I have this vague fantasy of one day doing a story and calling the comic Jason's Quest, which is an old DC title.

But no one's asked me so far and probably won't. So it's just something in my mind right now.

please, dear god in heaven, please let it stay there.

#the james robinson shitshow #comics talk

[ofasteroids]

CHRISTIAN’S TWENTY FIVE GIFTS OF CHRISTMAS FOR LOTTIE !!

GIFT ONE OF TWENTY FIVE: heart of gold, a self para of franklin davenport.

EVERYTHING HAD TO be perfect. christmas was a time of joy, family, and cheer... but not for franklin davenport. it was always chaos for him. he had to pose for the family christmas card, make appearances at fundraisers, make the rounds of family friends’ christmas parties... it was no wonder why he had barely had time to even plan out his christmas with his boyfriend will. he was going nonstop during the most wonderful time of the year, and frankie couldn’t wait for things to start slowing down.

IT WAS ALMOST christmas, literally days away, before he’d even gotten any shopping done. his parents were accounted for, his friends from college’s, his aunts’ and uncles’, his cousins’, and even will’s little brother’s gift were all wrapped up. now, frankie just needed to put the finishing touches on will’s gifts. while the others had all been professionally wrapped, he made it even more of a challenge to wrap his boyfriend’s gifts himself.

BUT FRANKIE HAD come to a fork in the road. he’d already purchased will a bunch of clothes--not that he needed them--and cute little stocking stuffers... but it wasn’t enough in his eyes. he had to make it personable, not like he was a robot... which seemed the case to some people. but the only thing that seemed to come to mind was a locket. he’d toyed with the idea for weeks now, pushing it back further and further because he thought he’d get a better idea... but the more he thought about, the more it appealed to frankie. and it was the afternoon right before christmas eve that he marched himself into the jewelry store.

FRANKLIN WANTED IT to be special, it had to be.the jeweler presented him with locks of all shapes and sizes and colors... but nothing really struck him as noteworthy. the bronze was too orange, or the heart didn’t look perfect enough fro him. he was sure he’d gone through at least fifty lockets, almost admitting defeat.

“ THESE ARE THE last ones we’ve got, ” she announced to the boy, annoyance growing evident with each syllable.

NOTHING CAUGHT HIS eye at first glance. frankie didn’t want to get him silver, it looked too cheap and tacky, in his opinion. an circle or oval wouldn’t do either, it had to be a heart... but then on closer examination, his hazel hues locked in on the one. the locket was shaped in the image of heart, and it was gold... real eighteen karat gold... and to make it even better, the whole left side of the heart was encrusted with diamonds. franklin didn’t care the price; he was going to get it.

FRANKIE WAS CONTENT with himself as he left the store. he’d fished out a healthy sum of cash, but he didn’t care. will deserved it. he deserved a real christmas, one where he didn’t have to pretend.to be happy, where he could genuinely be happy. frankie just wanted to make will feel at home, even if his actual home wasn’t the most friendly.

THAT NIGHT, HE’D cut out a photo of them to slip inside the locket. frankie’s fingers ran over it, flipping it over. i am hidden in your heart, o flower, the engraved back read. it was cheesy, sure, but it was true... frankie couldn’t help but smile... but the gift wasn’t complete yet. far from it... taking out the most christmas-themed stationery he could find at the store, frankie’s pen soon started looping words on the page beneath him.

william chambers,

you are my most favorite person in the world. not to be corny, but you are my sunshine. you’re the reason i get out of bed. you’re the reason i smile. you’re the reason i’m happy... and i know i’m not perfect, but i just want to make you as happy as you make me. we’ve come a long way from playing in the sandbox to hating each other’s guts to drunken hookups... but i’m very pleased with the way we turned out. i hope you can say the same... so as for a token of my love, i got you a locket, so you know i’m always with you. inside is a picture of us, and even if you don’t wear it, i hope you’ll keep it with you, in case you get lonely... because i am always with you, will... in spirit. in your heart. no matter if you’re in dc or tulsa or denver or halfway across the globe. i love you, darling.

all my love and merry christmas,  franklin davenport

FRANKIE CAREFULLY WRAPS it in paper so metallic and shiny, it could be seen from a small planet. it sticks in the bottom of will’s stocking, wanting to save the best gift for last. he finishes up stuffing the stockings for will and his little brother eddie, humming “have yourself a merry little christmas” the whole time... and he did.

#* // FRANKLIN. #* // SHIP: franklin & william. #* // VERSE: canon. #* // INTERACTIONS: franklin.

[sincerelybluevase]

The Perks of Writing Fanfiction

At the start of this year, I promised myself I would write something every day. After all, if you want to be a writer, the best thing you can do is sit down and write, write, write. My head is full of stories that I constantly add to, but I will never confront and, hopefully, conquer my weaknesses if I don’t actually make myself write through them. Anyway, I started off pretty well; I wrote every day in January on an idea I had for a novel. However, I found my interest waning, and as the enthusiasm that had initially urged me to keep going puttered out it became increasingly hard to keep going. My insecurities reared their ugly little heads and I quit. Now, I don’t like being a quitter, but I didn’t know what to write, either. That is, until I read a lot of fanfiction, thought Why the hell not? and wrote my very first fic, and have not looked back since. I’ve written something every day and had more fun writing than I’ve had in years. Fanfiction is not generally considered to be the highest form of writing (it is frowned upon in many circles, I’m sure), but I’d say there are actually a lot of benefits to it, namely:

-          Fanfiction allows you to interact with other fans. Writing can be very lonely, so getting into touch with people who like the same thing as you do is wonderful.

-          It is also a great way to delve deeper into the stories you love. Sitting down and thinking about the emotions and actions of your favourite characters may allow you to explore depths of the story that you may not have reached without.

-          Don’t get me wrong: there are absolute wonderful fics out there. If their writers would churn out some original fiction, I’d buy it without hesitation. Even so, fanfiction doesn’t have to be up to the standards of published fiction, and that’s alright: it can be highly enjoyable despite not being terribly good. I’m a perfectionist, so being ‘allowed’ to write things that may not be up to my usual standard without beating myself over the head with every single mistake is really quite refreshing.

-          Fanfiction gives you the possibility to hone your writing skills. From writing fics of only a couple of hundred words to massive stories that would fill hundreds of pages, you undoubtedly learn something from every fic you write. This is partly because of the high rate of interaction with fellow fanfic writers, who can give tips and advice to help you improve. I especially like this, because the atmosphere remains relaxed and people are genuinely helpful.

-          There’s an almost instant reward (when you post your stuff, that is). People will read it and review it or like it, which is a great boost to your confidence as a budding writer. Writing novels is a long and often tedious process with little security; there is no guarantee that your story will be published, let alone read and loved. I think every writer needs a little compliment every now and then, and fanfiction is a good way to get it.

Overall, fanfiction seems a bit like a sandbox to me: it is great fun and a great place to learn without feeling insecure or overwhelmed.

#writing tag #fanfiction #about me

[eowynstwin]

so!

looks like i’m gonna replay andromeda, although i might wait until at least one story dlc has been released (depending on the price of the dlc and the content). there were a lot of elements i thought could have been strengthened, but the resolution of the main plot (excluding the boss battle bc it was...not challenging) was very satisfying, and I’m glad that the writing team took it in the direction they did.

the ending also leaves room for possible sequels, which, depending on how those are pulled off, I’m opening to also playing (also even paying for--I got this copy of mea by trading in my laptop at best buy for store credit).

my final criticisms and praises for the game, if anyone is interested, are under the cut (heavy spoiler alert (also they’re pretty comprehensive)):

CONS (so we can end on a good note):

-Too many goddamn fetch quests. I left the tasks unfinished, because a ton of them were broken, and almost none of them were worth doing.

-i cannot stress enough, the character creator needs a MAJOR revamp. bioware has stated that they will be implementing changes, and they cannot come fast enough. staples of bioware CCs were missing and very much mourned, and it made the game feel too experimental. 

-the final boss fight felt lackluster. wave after wave of easy enemies and an architect that didn’t feel as challenging as the previous four, and i never got to personally shove my boot up the archon’s bony ass. i think it would have felt a lot more satisfying if i had fought the archon himself--he could’ve been a souped-up ascendant, or something.

-i did not get to yell my lungs out at kennedy for making that stupid goddamn decision. “are you gonna name your kid after me?” is not how i would respond to a woman who decided to conceive a child in the middle of an ongoing crisis. it would have been more along the lines of “you’re fucking lucky i’m letting you keep that kid, because you clearly do not have good decision-making skills and are selfish enough to endanger others to get what you want, AND you seem to think whatever you do is justified”

-the armor options were lackluster--there were only one or two that i liked, and there were very few variations altogether.

-i would have liked more environments to explore very much. the four that we got were nice (excluding the nexus, of course), but again i compare to DAI--there were at least nine huge sandboxes to play in, and all extremely diverse, from mountain valleys to plague-ridden swamps to rocky deserts. in andromeda, we had a snowy planet, a small rainforest, and two desert planets. and a destroyed planet, but i’ll be honest, i didn’t do much there besides vetra’s loyalty mission.

-despite loving the bejeesus out of jaal...there wasn’t enough content there to satisfy me. the culmination of the romance is wonderful, don’t get me wrong, but i just didn’t feel like the scenes i got with him were enough. that’s not me saying THERE’S NEVER ENOUGH I LOVE HIM SO MUCH OMG, that’s me saying that some opportunities to work in the existence of jaal and ryder’s relationship weren’t taken when they really would have made the romance felt less immaterial. i don’t recall hearing anyone comment on our relationship, except for Peebee, and that was only when prompted to give her opinion on the crew (a dialogue option which most likely players would have already exhausted). this goes for all romance options--content videos are twenty minutes at best. mea claimed to be the largest, most dialogue-heavy game bioware has produced--if all the effort put into those additional tasks had instead been put into stuffing all the romances with fluffy, smoochy, sexy goodness, i think this game really could have shined in the romance department.

-speaking of Peebee (and this might come from the above listed bias): there is a limit to my toleration of romance options flirting with each other, and peebs exceeds it.

-lastly, i do not appreciate that the entire prologue of the game, which established major characters, the arrival of the first people from the milky way in heleus, and their reaction to the less-than-favorable circumstances were all catalogued in a comic. this is like DAI all over again--with major, game-defining plot elements being covered in novels and comics that most players aren’t going to buy or even read. i certainly didn’t read it, i don’t plan to until it’s easily accessible, and i don’t at all like that once again, bioware decided to essentially make important parts of the plot far less easy to access.

PROS:

-The environments, though not as diverse as I would like, are stunning. Remember how pretty the DAI environments looked? These are better, so much better that DAI’s now feel like downgrades. That’s a big step forward.

-some moments in this game genuinely had me on the edge of my seat, had me close to tears, had me giggling and blushing uncontrollably. Drack’s monologue about finding a reason to live again in his baby granddaughter? That moment when you learn that the archon has stolen the hyperion, and disconnected you from SAM? Jaal’s soft kisses behind the waterfall? incredible moments.

-the nomad banter is priceless. we love hearing our squadmates interact, and mea delivers there and on the tempest, in which your crew and squadmates explore and interact with each other just as much as you do.

-the animation for romance culmination scenes is soooo satisfying. i can actually see my ryder’s lips touch her love interest’s. there’s really nothing more i could’ve asked for.

-the wide variety of weapons! i was pleasantly surprised by how easy it was to tailor my loadout to perfectly fit my playstyle. (i stuck with the sweeper and black widow throughout the game and had oodles of fun,)

-HAIR PHYSICS. BIOWARE FINALLY GOT IT. GOLD STAR

-more cutscenes! previously, DAI only had a camera zoom when you’d talk to your squad mates at your base of operations. not any more! i very much hope they’ll keep this mechanic.

-the wiiiiiiiide variety of hair colors is so great. i can have neon or pastel hair if i want to. not to mention all the variations in red, black, brown, and blond.

-JUMP JETS. VERTICAL MOVEMENT. BLESS.

-combat is so much more fun! it feels smoother than it ever has.

-Ryder’s snark has me in fits of laughter almost every time i boot up the game. It’s like Bioware installed a funnel that transferred every thought I had into Ryder’s mouth.

-speaking of Ryder--I felt like I could seriously relate to the character I played, thanks to her being so close to me in age, and i really, really like that. I could immerse myself more fully in-game because Ryder and I were so alike: early twenties, having to suddenly handle a huge load of responsibilities they didn’t expect or train for, dealing with a whole new environment separate from the one they grew up in. I felt as though the stuff i go through (and how monumental it feels) was represented in-game, and given the proper concern it merits. Ryder is very dear to me.

-Mental illness is handled very well. Lexi reminds everyone that should they exhibit symptoms of PTSD and depression, they should seek treatment for it and have no shame in doing so. As someone who lives with mental illness, I felt pretty good having read that entry she wrote.

-The whole feeling of the game--exploration, discovery, working together to make a home--came across really well. A lot of what Ryder does is what people my age dream about: going to foreign places and meeting new people, seeing what the world (and universe) is made up of, building a life for yourself surrounded by friends and family who care about you. That, in my opinion, was the most valuable part of the game, for players like me: you get to live out your dream on a much grander scale, with much higher rewards.

#mine: chatter #me:a

[thatguysamaniac-blog]

In roughly a week a swathe of 30-40 somethings are going to relive and re-start a habit in a bid to re-misspend a misspent youth. There is a swell of hype in niche pockets of the Internet as people get more and more excited for the launch of World of Warcraft Classic. But why? Why is there the familiar toot-toot of the hype-train on the horizon for a product that is over a decade old, has a newer shinier iteration currently out and available to play, and a product that held marmite-like, positive and negative criticism when it was out. Just to clear things up I have bought my ticket (ed: and a train drivers hat, matching t-shirt, undies and socks and the special edition coke cans) and I am on the hype train! I am genuinely looking forward to Classic, but my goals and approach are going to be massively different to it, as will it be for much of the community. So I'm gonna play a little bit of devils advocate here... Upon launch many, many people will just be diving in for the pure nostalgia of the game, and very few of us will (ed: should) spend the amount of time and effort that we previously had done in the original WoW. Especially since because of our demographic, most of us are now grownups* with grownup commitments. Being an adult aside, and just comparing current WoW and Classic WoW, part of what I have seen about why Classic has such a following, it that current WoW (retail) sees a bit of backlash in regard to how it plays nowadays, it is considered "dumbed down", the game has streamlined, homogenised, and refined itself to large degree making interaction minimal, levelling, dungeoning and raiding are all infinitely more accessible, and faster. The game has become easier, where, in classic, you would have to learn an individual enemy boars moves so you know how to kill him before he killed you, now you kill several boars, and don't even have time to read what moves it did on you. Where you used to chat to your guildmates or just general chat and group together and adventure your way to a dungeon, it has now been replaced by a couple of button presses followed by a teleport to the dungeon entrance. In short the game has become more of an action fantasy RPG, than an MMORPG. This is in part Echoed by my friend and fellow WoW classic returnee Joldrath: That being said, as we are all grownups* with grown up commitments, is Retail actually just the game we need for our hectic lives?! Is it WoW for adults? The game is so refined that it now sectioned off up into bitesize chunks, rather than the infamous 16-hour junk food stuffing, poop-socking sessions. As with most things on the Internets nowadays, hype lives in a bubble, and a select few loud voices are the ones that get heard. Does Classic exist just for these voices? Does this only exist for private server people? Is it just for streamers? The private server community and the streamers go hand in hand and the tin foil hat theory is that Blizzard just wanna cash in on this... Private servers have been running for years, and streamers sit on their ad revenue, when Blizz ain't even getting a subscription. Will Classic just be a way to regulate private servers will it be World of Warcraft: public private server edition. Probably. The thing is the WoW from 2004 did not have the influencer/content-creator machine to work with, but it did have a lot more eccentricities, character builds and fun to be had in that fashion, that in all honestly it is going to be a great place for content creation! 15 minute bites of "Look at this build kill this thing" or "10 Paladins take down Ragnaros".  But is that the reason the folks diving into nostalgia want to play it again? Probably not. For me, part of the nostalgia was that this game was emerging, new builds were coming out, people discussed strategies and new patches brought all sorts of shenanigans with them. WoW was a sandbox playground allowing for meta-gaming of all kinds and involving everyone in the community. With WoW Classic we are getting the final patch of WoW, we are getting  "phases" where content is opening up but nothing more, and I think that may be a drop off point for a lot of people, "what's next" is very much a thing in WoW hence the plethora of patches, content and expansions that's essentially kept WoW going and with a few other games created the Games as a Service Hellscape we now live in. What we are getting is a little slice of life, a snapshot of WoW as it existed for maybe a few months (?) and a few things will cycle around it. Yeah, don't worry,  I hear myself "Finally, WoW Classic, what's next?", but that is definitely a thing, and I'm sure it's not just me, I wonder what the hook will be to keep people on if there is nothing around the corner... or is there? One hot topic is, what will happen after the phases? simply a reset and start the phases again? there is debate that based on it's success will Blizz just dive into The Burning Crusade and so on... Or it is also speculated that there could be some horizontal development continuing development but keeping the lvl 60 WoW classic experience, Could we see Death knights join us at lvl 60 or could we see Paladins on the horde side? Maybe some pandas could join the fight? Could we see tweaking to see viable Ret-lol DPS?!?? There was also a suggestion that WoW Classic could potentially enter seasonal play, akin to that of Diablo 3 with buffs and effects and such at lvl 60, changing up gameplay. Personally I would love to lift a couple of the non-gameplay elements from modern WoW, Specifically the overhaul to the character models to make them prettier, and hand-in-hand, I heart my transmogging and would love to allow collecting those looks at lvl 60 be made viable (without the masses and stacks of bank room being used up by mats you need to just go to a dungeon in Classic). In any case I do hope there are plans post final phase, given the world we live in for the effort/time we have made with our lvl 60 this time round, it would be nice to have new challenges and change-ups to actually look forward to. So do we need WoW Classic? Based on my grumpy contrarian ramblings above: all we are getting is a non-updated game intended for private server veterans and content creators that due to its time sink qualities will mostly be inaccessible to the commitment-laden nostalgia crowd that actually want to wallow about there! What is the pull to bring people back and, and then stay back? I am fully a part of the mid-life-crisis-got-commitments-nostalgia crowd, I got shit I need to do! I actually spend my evenings with loved ones rather than skulking in "my mom's basement". I cook food rather than picking away at luke-warm kebab on a Molten Core run etc etc. So why should I look forward to a game known to be a time-sink when I can a similar dopamine hit from Retail or even just any other game. Jesus fucking hell, Richie Who's a Debbie Downer! Ha, well unfortunately much of the above is true and quite honestly when this was announced, I immediately thought and realised this was going to be hyped behind a lot of rose-tinted glasses and to echo my parting statement from this post after the announcement, I was always going to play it, just to dip my toe-in at the very least. WoW was arduous, it was not an easy game. And I had to ask myself a few hard questions like: Why do I want to play that grind again? Can I find the time to play again? Do I even want a faithful recreation of that game from 15 years ago? What do I want from another WoW experience!? And Boom! that was the question that re-ignited my passion to play! Personally I love the Paladin class, I played my Blood Elf Paladin at from the first expansion onwards, but in WoW I (badly) played a Mage. I think what I want from WoW Classic is... Drum roll... ...wait for it... ... "Redemption" ... ... ... geddit? Cuz redemption is the name of a paladin spell?... ...Fine whatever, geez... I want to experience the original paladin or play WoW Paladin: Classic Flavour. I wanna do the Paladin Horsey quests (at least the alliance version), I want to do the multitude of Paladin-ish quests in the game, the Scarlet Monasteries and the Scarlet Crusade through Hearthglen, and on to getting Exhalted with the Argent Dawn. And so I realised that I have almost set myself a Goal, a path to go through the game with My goal will simply be lvl 60 hitting the iconic Paladin quests along the way. As much as I have had a grumble about what WoW classic is and if we need it, but it cannot be denied that when WoW came out it was so impactful on everything (media, games, etc), and perhaps this resurgence of Classic can rekindle some of what sparked that zeitgeist. Wow is old, and that cant be denied, just have a look at her face, her non existent nose, and the world is the same, jagged polygonal models, scenery with seams etc etc. However most of the time it can be very beautiful, Each zone has a different flavour, musical theme, and atmosphere, and its hard to any parallels that rival this even today. And it's Huge, yes you can argue that today its huger, with all of the additional zones being added in, but in all actuality because of the addition of flying mounts the world is just so much smaller. Recently I had a chat with Thatguyer, Doppelganger, discussing about how that leap from 16-bit to 3D was so impressive and awe-inspiring, but nowadays you can almost feel like you are just playing an N64/PS1 game, just with smoother graphics. What is the next leap in games? Where do we go from here? logically it should have been VR/AR, but is too much of an ask for the consumer, despite it being forced into our eyesockets. I would argue that mainstream MMO machine of WoW was a leap at that time, moving to online play but at the same time generating community spirit was a massive turning point for games. The traction it gained led the way for the online console experiences and ultimately the community based games we see dominating the Twitch-osphere. Is there more that revisiting this monolith can change/teach the new generation of people who think playing computer games is a job? As the hype-train has been getting ever closer to its destination, I have had to change my news-getting methods, where I used to haunt/feature on WoW Insider, it is now a shadow of it's former self. I have been looking to Podcasts, Reddit and even joined Discord. In particular I wanna give a shout out to countdowntoclassic.com and a big shout out to the shows host Josh on @count2classic who has kept the hype train running with interviews with Class leaders, the original designers and generally great WoW Classic content! It has been a bit part of what is making me excited about Classic! Anyways right, I guess see you in Azeroth? Love and Seal, Judge, Rave, Repeat. Richie X *Grownups absolutely use the word grownups, we're definitely not three cats in a trench coat, fake nose, glasses and a hat. No sir.

http://www.thatguys.co.uk/2019/08/wow-classic-do-we-need-this.html