#I accidentally posted this on the wrong blog first because I'm an idiot

[towelclips]

Oc lore please

*insert holding knife & fork like toon*

YOOO LFG

*ahem* I'm normal now

So, uh, I've got a lotta oc lore, so this is gonna be a long post that I'm gonna break into chunks

Toon mystery-verse (one of my favs)

The main players in this one are Millie Grey, Benson Elwood, and Percy De Luca (tho I if I make this idea a full webcomic, I'm gonna include some of @naviofortido's ocs as major players too)

The story is about these main three looking into mysterious happenings and alleged cult activity in their town (mostly Millie and Benson being dragged into it by Percy, who's a major enthusiast about that kinda stuff). After an incident while they're investigating stuff, Millie winds up with the ability to turn into a cartoon character, and she and Benson wind up having to keep it a secret from Percy (because how tf do you explain that) while continuing to try and figure things out.

Extra tidbits: Millie and Percy are very gay for each other (making Millie hiding toon shenanigannery even harder), Benson likes prog rock and nearly killed Millie when she called Roundabout "the song from JoJo", the idiot trio had a movie night one time and Percy and Benson accidentally traumatized Millie by showing her An American Werewolf in London (stuff like that horrifies her)(she spent half an hour in the bathroom throwing up), the gang's mains in Mario Kart are Bowser (Millie), Wiggler (Benson), and Mii (Percy), Benson gets tooned later on, I'm running an ask blog exploring one of the major antagonists' origins (@archive-askblog), and one of the other major antagonists is a bitch (gotta do more with her soon)

Sci-fi stuffs (been violently rotating recently)

Haven't really figured out a plot yet, but I have figured out lots of worldbuilding, such as some aspects of alien cultures, and splitting humans into 2 different factions (the nature entwined and primarily agriculture and exploration focused Nations of the Free Planet, and the wealthy Sovereign Union of Mars)

Alien species (that I have yet to digitally draw -v-;):

E'Ymahi, kinda built like a llama with gorilla hands and crab eyes, they're very artsy and get along really well with the NotFP, and one of the first alien species humans have made contact with. Technologically in their equivalent of the 1960's before humans made contact.

(notebook doodles I need to digitize +a clay doll I made)

Temi, the E'Ymahi already had some crablike features, but these guys are very crablike. They don't like either faction of humans much, thinking the NotFP are gross and uncivilized for living with nature (a lot of their art and expression comes from cold and geometric architecture), and the SUoM are cruel to their workers and obnoxious in their gaudy displays of wealth. They were the first aliens humans made contact with, but they took one look at humans and were like "Fuck this".

(notebook doodles)

Skarmovian, towering, warmongers who resemble a combination of a shark and a minotaur. They're not really affiliated with humans, mostly because they don't care. Their religion is based around chaos, and it's a major ritual to eat those who died in battle. (Made these guys in Spore when I decided it'd be funny to kill everything, but then they stuck in my brain and are a part of this thing)(the cannibalism thing came from Spore too)

Don't have any notebook doodles, but I do have the original Spore creature!

Ovistrite, centaurian and amphibious creatures, they are a very wealthy species and get along very well with and recently joined the SUoM.

(also originated from Spore and wound up sticking, they're from my first ever playthrough of the game)

The notebook doodles are fairly recent, as I was thinking about them recently

What if Terminator role reversal?

Don't have much plot figured out for this one, but it's basically what it says on the tin. I was watching Terminator with my dad and I thought to myself "What if there was a story about humans trying to overthrow robots, but they were in the wrong and the robots were actually taking better care of the planet than they were)

I've figured out the basic beats and characters tho!

Basically, after rich people kinda fucked up the planet and the surviving members of humanity isolated themselves in bunkers, robots started tending to the planet, thousands of years later, the bunker humans try to destroy the robots, because one of the major bunker human leaders (a member of the wealthy elite who remained from the apocalypse pretending to be a god by keeping themselves alive with cybernetics) wants control of the planet again. The two major characters are Fern, a robot shepherd, and Albron, a human from the major bunker tribe, who rebels after learning the robots aren't evil and that they've been lied to.

Random tidbits

The robot town I wanna focus on is named Megan, and the town worships a decrepit service robot (who was owned by someone named Megan, hence the town name) as a deity of prophecy

The robots are named after plants and artists (in English, as language hasn't evolved for them due to being computers), and the humans are named after scientists, with their names being somewhat jumbled and corrupted to kinda represent the evolution of language, examples include: Albron (Albert), Niklai (Nikola), and Eldson (Edison)

(bonus note, Eldson is the false god, and is exploitative of Niklai :) )(edison can suck an egg)

#long post #ocs #my ocs #stimmed so hard seeing this notif #eat well my good chum #cw emetophobia #cannibalism mention #<-forgot to tag those...

[elecalice]

[VENT] "The Collateral Damage of Love"

Full Image Below

TW// ABUSE AND GROOMING

I posted this drawing that I made on 2023 on DeviantART, but I forgot to post it here. That's because I wasn't unsure to post this here. I felt unsure to post this because... It's a really sensible drawing for me.

That's because this vent art reminiscing of my failures towards love, in any forms. Not just romantic, although It was a significant part of it.

The first one, we were unexperienced (it was literally our first romantic relationship) and had a wrong idea on how to love. So it became "overly-sweet" (Or "Empalagoso" in Spanish, which is the best way to describe it) who were constantly saying "I love you" all the time. And we didn't do much like talk other things outside of love. We were so inmature at that time. I'm thankful that we're better as friends than lovers, and we're still friends to this day.

The second one, was my abusive ex. I already told what happened between me and him in a blog entry as well as the vent art "Slave". I became his emotional punching bag, he was SO self-destructive it was affecting me psychologically and emotionally. I tried to told him to get help and get better, and he said that he was going to be better, but he continued those self-destructive attitudes for years, to the point that it became difficult for me to cry for him, but I became shaky due to the amount of stress I had to deal with. And it even generated those painful white spots on my mouth. (I just remembered that he made a discussion because I ended up sleep-texting to him because I was dealing with stress due to high school) Yes. There was moments he made good stuff for me, but it was not worth the pain I had to endure for years. As well as, me being unexperienced with love and he having multiple partners before me, said a lot of the power dynamics. (as well as the 3-year-gap but yeah...)

And also... there was another person related to him. He used to be his best friend, but he was more protective towards me, since I told him about the horrible relationship I was in. He was one of my most trusted "best friends". He actually listened to my special interests, he was interested on those, we also did RPs, especially since I love doing RPs (and still do!)

But he also groomed me. He got SO sexual towards me, and we even did sexual RPs and even commented how horny he gets towards me. I don't want to tell more information about it, the more I realized this, the more I felt awful. (Especially towards one series of sexual RPs we did that were TOO ALARMING in retrospective. I used to be secretly SO horny due to accidentally going on Danbooru when I was 13 years old, which I now realized that I got took advantanged of him because of that... sigh me. I'm a complete massive idiot...)

The things is that he was 7-8 years older than me, and I didn't knew that until 2023, when I asked his nephew how old he was, and we were equally shocked to that information. He died on late 2020, even if I hoped he could recover. He died of cancer. His death killed my hope, and It was one of the main reasons why I became a doomer and got into my dark age. But after realizing this and freeing of my abusive ex, I... still need to reflect on that. That "best friend" loved me, after all. But he was too horny and he used the "my penis will hurt me a lot if I don't 'liberate'" excuse... (I remember watching a video about grooming and when that excuse showed as one of the excuses groomers use to make their victims continue the sexual attitude, I screamed internally and later scream at a pillow since that's EXACTLY what he did and I felt HORRIBLE afterwards)

But all of these, remembering these failures... I remembered my bad moments of those relationships, my failures...

And I thought I didn't deserved to be in a relationship. I thought I was going to be alone, and I would run away of the idea of being in a relationship.

Thankfully, I don't have philophobia (the fear of love) and I feel secure on the idea of love. Especially since I'm healing and, after all, I was a victim.

The first ex, again, he's the cool one. We're still friends to this day.

My second ex and the dead groomer... I don't want to come back to that.

Hence that's why I initially hesitated on posting this. But... I posted on DA, I had to post it here.

#elec vents #vent art #tw abusive relationship #TW grooming #traditional art

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Hi Steph! I'm new to the fandom, could you please share with me the best Johnlock fanfics (in your opinion)? There is so much of them I'm lost... and I don't know which are the 'legendary' and 'must read' ones. Thank you so much!

Hi Nonny!

First of all, WELCOME!! I hope you are enjoying your time here!! OH GOSH, okay so funny thing, I’m actually currently making a list of ALL of my favourite fics ever, because someone else asked me ages ago, and now I have 5 other people asking me LOL.

As I explained in this post here, many people have already made great lists of “the best fanfics” in the fandom… But of course I’m stupidly picky about my fics.

Anyway, since I’m already working on an entire list of my biggest most fave fics ever in every place everywhere, how about for now, since I’m due for it, I give you my last bookmarked fics since I last did a list last month? I hope these will tide you over Lovely! In the meantime, you can also check out my ‘my fic recs’ blog tag, and I’ve a tonne of lists, some of which you can see here. 

I-J’s Last Bookmarked Fics (July 2017)

Upon Reflection, Tenable Frippery by emmagrant01 (T, 1,299 w. || John’s Beard, First Kiss, Fluff) – John was, inexplicably, growing a beard.

Gigantic by BubbleGumLizard (E, 2,135 w. || Size Kink, PWP) – John seems to avoid Sherlock seeing him naked. Sherlock wants to fix that.This is porn. Part 19 of Mystrade NaNoWriMo 2015

What He’s Like by magikspell (E, 2,919 w. || Love Confessions, Fluff, First Time, Inexperienced Sherlock) – Realistic first time. They love each other so much.

Straight Shooter by nefariosity (E, 3,249 w. || Est. Rel., Light Dom/Sub, Military Kink, PWP, Bottomlock) – Sherlock has a military kink. John indulges him.

The Prize We Sought Is Won by deathfrisbees (E, 4,610 w. || First Time, Mild D/S, Oral, Military Kink, Bottomlock) – Sherlock’s in love, or in lust, or both–unfortunately, the object of his affections is not only his completely oblivious flatmate, but said flatmate would probably run screaming into the hills should he find out. John’s been invited to a wedding–unfortunately, the groom used to serve under him back in Afghanistan, and requests that John wear a uniform he’s honestly not sure he fits into. Unfortunately for both flatmates, Sherlock’s got a military kink the size of Kandahar and John wants to know if he actually can fit into this uniform or if his eyes are deceiving him. It goes from there.

Facade by distantstarlight (M, 4,715 w. || Fluff, John’s Beard, No-Shave November, Grumpy Sherlock, Clueless Sherlock) – Sherlock is highly irritated with a challenge John has agreed to undertake. Why does he need to grow a beard anyway?

Telling the Bees by siennna (G, 5,174 w. || Fluff, Beekeeping, POV Sherlock, Love Confessions) – It took a beat of silence for the words to settle in, before both of them realized what John said. “You—” Sherlock started. “I—” John said at the same time. “Love me? You love me?” Sherlock asked faintly. Part 3 of sienna’s favorites

The Death of Doubt by Gingerhermit (E, 6,584 w. || Alternate Canon, BAMF John, POV Sherlock, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Hurt/Comfort, Angst/Drama, Meddling Mycroft) – Mycroft asks for John’s help in rescuing Sherlock from his Serbian captors.

Illogical, even. by magikspell (E, 9,119 w. || Grey-Ace Sherlock, Character Study, Growing Up, Victor Trevor, Romance, First Time/Kiss, Sherlock-centric) – Five reasons Sherlock never believed in love and one reason he does now.

With This Ring by Quesarasara (E, 9,121 w. || Est. Rel., Marriage Proposal, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Idiots in Love, Embarrassing Hospital Visits) – Sometimes even the best of plans go wrong. And sometimes wrong turns out to be exactly right.

The Painted Man by jinglebell (E, 9,894 w. || Tattoos, Scent / Tattoo Kink, Rough & Tender Sex, Fluff and Smut, Obsessive / Jealous Sherlock, Touch Starvation) – Here stood John Watson – middle name, Hamish, ex-RAMC captain and field medic, favourite brand of jam: Duerr’s, preferred toothpaste: Mentadent. Loyal, steadfast, interesting John had just done the most unpredictable thing merely by being.John’s body was covered, neck-to-waistband, shoulder-to-elbow, in tattoos.

Confidential by sussexbound (M, 10,654 w. || Epistolary, John’s Journal, First Kiss / Time, Fluff, Self-Acceptance/Discovery, John’s Sexuality) – When John accidentally stumbles upon the Confidential file Sherlock’s been keeping on him he is both angry and curious. What he learns about himself, though–well, that changes everything.

At the Edge of Desire by philalethia (E, 16,375 w. || Post S3, Pining, Arse Worship, Humour, First Kiss / TIme, Sexual Fantasy, Awkwardness) – While helping John move back in to the flat, Sherlock discovers a strap-on among John’s things. He finds the discovery considerably difficult to move past.

Tomorrow’s Song by agirlsname (M, 24,645 w. || Post-TRF, POV Sherlock, Angst with a Happy Ending, Virgin / Repressed Sherlock, Love Confessions, Slow Burn, Pining) – How can he think a relationship with me would be a good idea? I am the sort of person to take a break from my life and when I come back after two years, I expect to find it exactly as I left it. In reality I find it shattered to pieces. (I actually equate you with my life. When did I start doing that?)

Where Else Would I Be? by cwb (E, 34,910 w. || Retirementlock, Domestic Fluff, Falling in Love, Parentlock, Fluff and Smut, Reminiscing) – John and Sherlock’s five-year-old granddaughter spends the weekend with them in Sussex. Sherlock happily indulges her whims, and John takes care of them while quietly revisiting the past thirty years of their lives together.

Left by lifeonmars (M, 45,153 w. || Magical Realism) – John Watson is left-handed. He’s tried not to let it affect his life, but as any Lefty knows, that’s almost impossible. {{for some reason this wasn’t bookmarked??? I’ve loved this story for years and apparently I didn’t bookmark it??? News to me.}}}

Bridging the Ravine by SilentAuror (E, 58,883 w. || Post S4, Couple For a Case, Bed-Sharing, First Times, Confessions, Awkwardness, Sex Trafficking) – Sherlock and John go undercover at Ravine Valley, a therapy centre for same-sex male couples in an investigation into a possible human trafficking ring. As they pose as a couple and fake their way through the therapy sessions for the sake of the case, it quickly becomes difficult to avoid discussing their very real issues. Set roughly six nine months after series 4.

#steph replies #my fic recs #fave fics #Anonymous #johnlock fic recs #july 2017

[kingsuckjin]

Hey moon, i just read your post on how fanfic writing can be such a pressure. You know you're one of the first writers i read fanfics of and decided to open a tumblr account. Your writing is so good moon. I hope you know it. And i actually understand where you are coming from. Maybe not with writing but with other stuff that i love to do. I think it's only human nature that we feel like doing better that we did before. Fear of failure, rejection it gets everyone i believe. So i think it's okay that u feel like that? Like okay in the sense that i happens cause we're all humans and it's part of the struggle. Pretty shitty but that's just how it is. When i get overwhelmed i usually take some time off of everything and everyone. Like get in solitude type until i feel like i fixed myself enough to face the world again. Whatever it is that's making you feel so tired or guilty (which it shouldn't be) i hope you let yourself heal from it. Life is changing all the time, so even though if you feel like you can't do this anymore right now. Sometimes later you might get the enthusiasm back to do it again. And then it wouldn't matter if anyone is liking it or following it much or not. It'll be only about your happiness. I hope you find that soon moon. But attaining you inner peace is the first thing here.

Idk if what i'm trying to say made much sense. You don't have to reply. I just wanted you to know this. I hope you feel better soon. Sending positive vibes and good wishes. Take a virtual hug and stay blessed sweetheart. Love you tons ❤💜❤💜❤💜❤

Hey there love🖤 it made perfect sense. This is going to be a long one and I'm gonna put warnings Tw: sexual harassment, bad friends, mental health, name calling, bullying and just a lot of terrible things I've been through and me explaining why I just can't be here on this blog. I know I've said dome of it before but I'm telling you, you all really have no idea.

I don't know if it's as much burnout or guilt as this blog is becoming overwhelming and I'm not sure how to maintain it. Before I started writing is casually comment on fics and leave reviews and compliments, and sometimes writers wouldn't answer them and I felt like it was something I did or said or they just didn't care, I was a whole idiot then. Even when I started writing and began to kind of gain a following I said to myself “this is easy to reply to comments and messages and requests, I don't have to accidentally hurt anyone by not replying” and then I just kept growing and learned how dumb I was. I love the interaction, and I read it all, every comment, every ask, every message and I'm unbelievably grateful for it and I'm fully aware other writers lack it and need it (and to even say all of this makes me feel terrible, I also deal with the feeling that I don't deserve all the kindness and comments) like, other writers get little to no interaction but sometimes when you aren't at your best mentally it's hard to keep up with even the slightest amount of interaction with people and often times id take a break after putting out something that did well because it was a little overwhelming and I also didn't feel like I deserved it (good old imposter syndrome). I have so many friends I've made on here that don't do as well as I do but in my opinion are MUCH better writers. On the opposite end, I've also had “friends” on here that would talk to me only to ask me to reblog their fics. Idk that's the other end of it, you just don't know who to trust on here and who actually cares and wants to really be friends. Since I've announced that I'm leaving this blog it's really shown me who actually cares about me as a person and not only whatever little measly about of influence I can give and bring to others. So I just want away from it all.

My actual plan is to shut it down here on kingsuckjin and keep writing on my other blog where I have set up boundaries for limited personal interactions. I don't care about the likes or reblogs, I just don't want the tangled web of this blog anymore. This is a hobby and it should never be this deep, but I know it was my fault for making it this deep so now I'm just going to start again and just keep it as a hobby and not let it take over so much of my time. It's not that I don't have the willpower to write, I'll always write, it's what I love, I just don't have the willpower to deal with some of the toxic stuff and people that come along with it all when you're in too deep here.

It's all just draining, and that's not even counting the terrible and scarring asks I get telling me bad things that someone is going to do to you all and myself, you wouldn't believe the stuff I've gotten and that I know others close to me have gotten in their ask boxes. Some people say they don't get anon hate and it makes me so happy to hear them say that, I long for that, I know a lot of us do. But leaving this blog is like leaving a bad relationship. I see my peers get a wave of anon hate and I say “fuck, not this again, that makes me feel so bad”, I see a wave of fics being stolen and say the same thing, I see other writers bullying smaller ones and say the same thing, I see racist people, gatekeepers, people hating on olderpeople here, people scrutinizing others hard work, people hating on genders and sexualities. You know what one of my first asks was when I started? “You need to be using more commas, it's hard to read your fics and you look illiterate” and English isn't even my first language, it's not the language first learned, I didn't learn it until I started school. I'm not a professional writer I've had never claimed to be a good writer, I didn't ask for any “constructive criticism” or anyone's two cents and honestly some people just need to keep stuff to themselves.

I've seen too much shit and while I spent a lot of time fighting all sorts of shit on here because it feels right, but it gets me nowhere and nothing but being labeled as some sort of a problematic blog and I’ve been told by other writers “yeah, I blocked you because I don't want to see that problematic shit on my dash” after I was fucking bullied along with countless others by one group of people. You can imagine after taking all of this, everything I've mentioned so far, how someone could feel too drained and scared to interact with people on here.

I know blogs that don't get into stuff or talk about things like that and I'm definitely not saying they're wrong because I now have a blog that I do that on too. Tbh, sadly, I think that's where a chunk of my followers came from, not my fics but me saying something isn't right and it feels in a way that I've gained followers off of “drama” and that makes me a little sick. While not saying anything and ignoring problems on here might not be great and also ignoring it won't make it go away, neither will me getting all fighty and upset over it, that just hurts me. I just want things to be more shallow, I just want this to be just a hobby again.

Anyway, the point I suppose is that I just need to shut the hell up and keep this place as it's needed to be for me, a place for me to share my writing and that's all because it's what best for me mentally. While interaction and stuff is great and myself and other writers do love it, there can be a darker shadow that comes with it like asks that state gross shit in detail that they would do to me or all the hateful the comments on fics id have to delete. I've been stalked, sexually harassed, plain old harassed, bullied, manipulated, made fun of, blackmailed, backstabbed, lied about, exposed, yelled at, and called horrible names more than I've ever publically and openly ever shared with any of you on this blog and more times than I can count on two hands or even four. Some people are fuckin just... well, they're not good, and it's made me just a little bit bonkers as well. it could be manageable, any one or two or even three of these things I've listed could be manageable and enough to carry on, but it's been a lot to keep carrying with all of this built up over the past few years. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love this place and how it brings people together and helps make changes and do so much good, but at the same time FUCK this place and I say that from the bottom of my soul. It's time for me to stand back away from it all and start again where I limit everything. I just wanna chill and write somewhere fresh and that's what I've been doing and I love it so much and I don't think if trade any about of followers, notes, popularity, or whatever else for it, that's not what it's about for me and if it is for someone else then that's okay, that's fine, as long as they're not hurting others to get it. I'm just saying I'm having a hard time engaging normally on here with everything else that's happening and has happened, it's just a me thing and I speak for no one else and it's nothing at all that all of my kind, supportive, loving, and talkative followers and moots have done.

#anon #im sorry for the rant #lub you 🖤