#I THINK I DID WELL HERE DUDE

[dungeons-and-dragon-age]

Sum Hawke kimsses <3

#well deserved postgame fluff <3 #once again practice that got out of hand gjsgdkd #i think they turned out nice tho :] #cant decide if i like the colored or uncolored ones more so i just put both here lol #also please ignore that fenris and belas hair looks different every time i draw them <3 #fenris #isabela #oc: liam hawke #oc: lilian hawke #my ocs #my art #maybe shouldve given liam more greys cos this dude starts greying by act 3 already jdfjksd #lilian gets em later but her hair looked so empty and i think she deserves some grey streaks (bela too <3 #also fenris did have ear piercings but it was distracting to have so much shinies in one area so i removed them #just pretend theyre still there lol

[crazymecjc]

shuake week day 2 - new game plus

plus, bonus!

#shuake week 2023 #oof my art i guess #persona 5 #goro akechi #akira kurusu #shuake #this is soooooooo incredibly silly goofy #there was this one post floating around on Twitter abt how akira had a matching pair of gloves when he did ng+ #and I went “ok but make it bigger #and like it’s silly yes but it’s also the tragedy of repeating the same events with the hope that they’ll turn out differently #until you’re physically overwhelmed with the reminder that no matter what you do you cannot change the fate of the person you love #idk I’m Crazy abt them dude #the angst spawned out of nowhere tbh she was a last minute addition #also this whole thing is kinda sketchy and rough but like I work full time during the summer #and I think I’d explode if I was dropping a fully rendered piece every day #so here we are #still a fun silly time regardless I hope!! #if all goes well I’ll be back tomorrow with another :))

[moeblob]

Deacon loves two things: Ymber and digging himself a grave.

Fulj hates one thing: Deacon.

#my characters #waiting on some info on the next commission so i indulged in ocs today bc i doubt i will have as much time for lil comics for a bit #deacon is so devoted hes like yeah i would kill for a deity that could easily kill anything himself but yknow teehee #and fulj just did you tell him you needed therapy also does he even know youd murder in his name #deacon caught red handed haha no of course i havent told him it should be obvious enough haha.... and its in his defense not his name :c #man really does have some issues but i love him so much and hes so devoted but like. unhealthily after a while #he does in fact need a chill pill and therapy but to be fair #ymber has needed therapy for centuries and yet he just bottles it all up and suffers so #its pretty unhealthy until they yell at each other one (1) time bc they are so insecure about things and get mad over very valid reasons #but then theyre like you know what that was necessary and i still want to stay by your side if you let me #and then fulj is like dude hey sorry you seem really happy did you fu- and ymber is like no please stop there we have not #fulj just squinting cause have not is very different than will not but whatever she doesnt wanna think about that with deacon involved ew #and eventually fulj is like hey ymber im sorry to say but i really do hate deacon and i dont even know why but he makes me uncomfortable #while deacon is just. in the room. hearing this and thinking how he knows she thinks hes weird but wow that wording hurts #and ymber doesnt wanna fill in memories better forgotten by fulj which she had forcefully removed #so he just says oh well his hair and clothing are black and you had someone in the past that you might see in him and its not a pleasant en #so you know maybe its that idk #and fulj is then WHATST i was rude to him for someone i cant even remember? lame im gonna try SO HARD to be nice to him now #and deacon just still sitting there with some food like this is v awkward and i wish i could not be here for it #and later he asks ymber about who he resembled and as ymber is descibing her it clicks in deacons head and he gets really sad #that he might somehow remind fulj of the woman she loved before she was punished for loving a mortal #and he feels kinda bad pestering her so much with his curiosities about deities and he kinda gets it #the fact hes close to ymber might remind her at the core that she was once that close with a mortal if not closer #anyway story time in the tags again #im so obsessed with these peeps and i have made them suffer so much but they do all end on a happy note #its still funny and nice to me that while fulj is creeped out by deacon and doesnt like talking to him #he still expresses the most emotions to her - he tries hard to remain serious around ymber and collected and obedient at all times #and when out and about with ymber he has to be intimidating and refuses smiling but fulj?? all sunshine and smiles and emotions easy to rea #and she is just that is so weird go away i hate you

[fellhellion]

Something something the spot’s goofy antics distract from how dangerous his own entitlement and resentment is

#I don’t want to be that guy but I feel a little bit like spot gets sanded down a tad into just the fact he’s funny #and he IS funny I get it. but what makes him scary is the power to lash out with his entitlement and resentment towards miles #it’s you did this TO ME (miles didn’t #he was busy getting pummeled by kingpin and then venom shocking him back and the building was being EVACUATED it’s literally no one’s fault #but spot’s that he was there AND miles didn’t even know he was there when the collider exploded) #so I’m owed the role that you made me into <- miles literally didn’t do this #I’m OWED being your nemesis because I created you <- when all of itsv is about its miles own choices that make him heroic and not the bite #spot can’t even take ownership of his own actions. he’s like oh IM not robbing you that’s the bank. well buddy I don’t see you robbing the #bank I see you harassing some guy owning a corner store #like I get it. ur a cosmic horror and it sucks capitalism is pushing u down and u can’t get a job but like OWN UP TO WHAT THE HELL YOU DO #LMAO #and even miles trying to genuinely reach out and say look I’m sorry I made u feel bad (even though this isn’t an owed apology) and spot #STILL is hellbent on breaking miles back for an imagined slight #I AM GOING TO KILL YOUR LITERAL FATHER BECAUSE I BLAME YOU FOR SOMETHING YOU DIDNT DO #like god lmao. he’s a fun silly villain but there’s legitimate anger and spite and RESENTMENT motivating him purely to try hurt miles back a #as* badly as he imagines miles hurt him. when it’s like dude. own tf up to who’s responsible here #I’m not angry at the spot btw I actually think he’s a fun villain but I think recognising that resentment is what makes him effective as a #*​frightening* villain and one that poses legitimate danger #tunes talks spiderverse #apologies xinakwans ik u said you didn’t want to read any spot posts hopefully this snags on ur filtered content block shdjfjfk

[the-deadlock-south]

scion

#overwatch #overwatch 2 #hanzo #hanzo shimada #art tag #in essence this is a redraw #i found a drawing i did of this skin years back when it was first released and i wanted to try drawing it again #in terms of a redraw it kinda failed but thats for a good reason cause i didnt even give dude arms in the first one whoops #much happier with whatever i got going on here #while im here though drawing this made me realize that hanzo's sleeves are different colors ?? #i dont know how i didnt notice that at first but. Huh. #how the hell does that look underneath then. i feel like if i saw it id become violent so lets just keep it this way #yeah this is nice :) im happy with this :) #i will say before i find something i am not happy with :) #oh too late #whatever im posting it now #maybe ill redraw /this/ four years down the line too #oh yeah i dont mean ?? to draw all of hanzos skins ?? just the ones i really like apparently #i remember i drew the cyberninja one years ago too but i think i lost the og files for that #oh well maybe one day ill draw it for fun

[padfootastic]

hello! here’s a lil drabble/ficlet situation about sirius being super invested in baby harry’s life, to the point he gets annoyed and jealous when he’s not immediately caught up on every little thing.

x

“I can’t believe you’d do this to me.”

Lily entered the dining room to an unusually confrontational scene. On one end of the table was her husband, hands held up, palms facing outward in a gesture matched by the pleading look on his face. Right across from him was Sirius, arms crossed across his chest and a severe frown on his face. In the middle, Harry was sitting with a thumb in mouth, watching his father and godfather intently. Lily was a bit surprised at how quiet he was being—usually the presence of his favorite people meant an overload of squeals and shouts and giggles.

“Padfoot—“ James began only to be cut off by Sirius’ hand swiping through the air.

“No, James, I didn’t expect this from you of all people,” he took a deep breath and Lily was startled to see the emotions play out on his face. “How could you?”

Lily decided to enter the conversation then before things could devolve any further.

“Er, what’s going on here?” In any other situation, the way in which both their heads swivelled to look at her, coupled with the surprise on their face, would’ve been comical but Lily was too distracted to care about that right now. She couldn’t even remember the last time James and Sirius had had a disagreement. Those two just didn’t do that.

Which was another issue all in itself and if she focused too long on it, it made her head hurt (how can two people who spend as much time as they do together never have any tension?? she didn’t get it, didn’t think she ever would). But for now, she had more important things to tend to.

“Well?” She asked again, seeing the expressions change on their face. James was making a face, not unlike a child who’d been caught with their hand in a biscuit jar whereas Sirius had doubled down. His brows were furrowed, lips pressed into a straight line, and the most stubborn expression Lily had ever seen on his face.

“We, er, that is—“ James tried, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. “It’s nothing, hon.”

Lily snorted in response. She could see Sirius staring incredulously at James and really, this was just getting weirder by the second.

“Evans,” Sirius said, curtly. She didn’t even bother correcting him knowing it was a lost cause at this point. “Will you please remind your husband that we had an understanding and I won’t stand for him breaking it as he pleases?”

“Sirius—“

Lily doesn’t let James finish his groan before cutting in. “What understanding?”

“Did you and your husband not name me Harry’s godfather for a reason?”

“…yes?”

“And does that not entail certain responsibilities and obligations on my part—“

“…Yes.”

“—as well as yours?” Sirius finished, speaking over her uncertain agreement. Now she was a bit stumped.

“Ours?” She blinked at him, wondering what he was on about. A quick glance in James’ direction showed no help from that side. Her husband had the most resigned expression of exasperation on his face, which was really saying something, considering how often he looked like that.

“But of course!” Sirius said, “You are aware that James has the mirrors, yes?” This time he didn’t even bother waiting for her to nod before continuing. “Which means instantaneous communication.” He stressed the last two words, eyes squinting and a stern wrinkle appearing on his brow.

“Si, stop being so dramatic,” James cut in. “You’re confusing the dragonshite out of Lily.”

She grimaced lightly. “Very elegantly put, darling.” Her dear, dear husband only sent her a cheeky wink in return.

“Fine,” Sirius sneered. “Let me ask you this, then.” He pointed one long, pale finger in her direction, her eyebrows raising at the attempt at intimidation.

“Is it or is it not true that Harry, my godson, crawled on his bum across the living room exactly eight days and three hours ago as of right now?”

She opened her mouth to say—not sure what, exactly, but something. Before she could, though, Sirius had already cut in with an overemphasised, “And. Is it or is it not true that James, once my dearest friend—“

“Once?” James yelped.

“—and you, fellow co-wife—“

“You can’t be serious right now,” James groaned, clearly distressed if he wasn’t considering his egregious word choice.

“—did not even bother to use aforementioned mirror to inform me, post-haste?” Sirius finished dramatically, with the air of someone throwing down the gauntlet. He stared at them with a ridiculous air of triumph around him, daring them to disagree.

Lily could only stare in bemused disbelief at her husband’s best friend, nay, brother. One of her closest friends in his own right. Someone who, by all accounts, was incredibly smart and articulate.

Perhaps his bloodline was making more of an appearance here?

“He really has gone off his rocker, hasn’t he, Lils?” James’ spoke what she dared not say out loud. “Should’ve considered this before putting him in charge of the sprog.”

The words had the intended effect. In front of her wide eyes, Sirius basically puffed up in outrage, reminding her terribly of a charm-dried duck. He leaned forward to wrap a possessive arm around Harry, as if James could’ve been anything but joking and they’d take his precious godchild away from him, keeping him plastered to his chest. Harry, for his part, was as overjoyed as ever. He happily wrapped his chubby fingers around two of Sirius’ and prompt tried to insert the whole thing in his mouth, drooling and chewing gummily.

And Sirius, who was notorious for not even deigning to shake hands with strangers (and on one unavoidable occasion, had actually cast a cleaning charm on his palm the moment they’d stepped back from the handshake), someone who applied three different kinds of purifying charms on anything before using it, barely even spared a glance in his direction beyond pressing a kiss to his crown.

“Well, nothing for it then,” Sirius sniffed, nose slightly in the air in a way that reminded Lily entirely too much of Narcissa Black—not that Sirius would appreciate the comparison, of course. “I’m afraid I must take my godson out and away from this dishonourable institution then.”

And in front of both the Potters’ disbelieving eyes, Sirius actually swept out of the room with their child happily lounging in his arms, neither of them looking back even once.

“James…”

He made an answering squeak, still looking at the doorway through which Harry had basically been kidnapped by an over zealous godfather.

“What just happened?”

Her only response was the sound of his head landing on the table with a thunk.

#sirius black #harry potter #james potter #good godfather sirius black #well hello there first piece of fic i’ve writtten in a while #also coincidentally first something of 2023 lol #listen this just came to me a while ago—the thought of sirius throwing a hissa fit bc james didn’t mirror call him as soon as harry did sumn #even if it’s the most irrelevant inconsequential thing ever #and that just kinda snowballed into lowkey crack scenarios #like s in the middle of a fight and picking up his mirror to talk to harry #or he’s spying on death eaters but james is calling to tell him that harry ate his first piece of solid food and sirius just has to listen #and of course tell harry he’s so very proud of him for being such a big boy #so. yknow what i mean? #it’s just rly fun lol #also now that i’m reading it over—it’s funny how sirius here is exactly like those dramatic s asks i got a while ago lol #making a big deal out of small things sort of a dude #lowkey this was so hard to write #it just felt so unnatural #i think i’ve forgotten how writing works #everything feels weird #the co wife thing is a not so sneaky reference to wife wars #~lore. if u will 😌 #pen’s writing #tumblr works

[spider-man-2o99]

Just wanted to say that I have been thinking of you and pre-emptively empathizing with the nonsense you are no doubt being flooded with and the psychic damage it must be causing. Keep stanning the king ignore the weirdos <3

thankg u.,, i feel like ive been trapped in a fuckign . Torture Labyrinth these past coupl days . but. wwe will. We Will Yet Persist onwards w/ our hand on the left wall till we;re either out or at the center i swear 2 fucking GOD,

#talking tag #asks #th pain is forever the Horrors r unending the lack of media comprehension on all sides is Disappointin But Also My Goddamn Life I Guess lol #though i will say ppl in my inbox have actually been.. surprisingly polite overall? if not outright rather kind as a whole. um. post-atsv. #but. god. i have not Talked About so much of that movie because i kind of just. #..ok actually i realize this is gonna sound rude as hell lmao. but. hhaha i Kinda Just. was fool enough to Assume that everbody would yknow #like. Comprehend The Film yk yk yk. since it is a well-written movie that doesnt try to Hide any of what it;s abt? yk? #i come On Here onto tumblr dot bumblr and i make my stupid esoteric gddamn complaints abt 2099 Themes for Me Only so my head doesnt blow up #n silly ol me i really do like earnestly honestly in my Heart think. like. we all saw the same movie. right? mayb thingsll calm down. #but oh oh oh oh oh no no no No No. they do Not calm down they get So Much Worse. #and now hypothetical Internet Strangers might be Passing Judgement bcuz we look like an Apologist 4 assuming Everyone Knew Media Literacy #CHRIST. do people think i think mig was. like. In The Right. in atsv. no ive known he would be Wrong for years dudes. #why do yall think i was so low-key Disappointed he was placed in a role that couldve better suited. like. Superior Spider-Man. #public image. DING-DONGs. man he is Never Going To Be In Movies Again After This Hes An AU SPIDER-MAN FROM THE 90S. LORD! #i had SO MUCH FUN watching atsv!!!!!!!!!!!!! #i dont like the choices it made to put miguel in the situation that it did. Bizarre Thematic Changes to 2099 that Only I Care Abt. but like #that is SUCH a fuckin SMALL and insanely autistic nitpick like i earnestly loved the hell out of the film and its mig is-- #--Earnestly One Of His Better/Best Adaptations despite bein within the limited confines of th plot nd setting he is In & w/o his inner mono #..i just. Hate So Much That This Movies Version Of Miguel Will Be The Only One That Anybody Knows For The Next Seven Years At Least. yknow. #i lov watching that fuckers trainwreck of a slowmotion mental breakdown for two hours but the movie gave practically Zero Context 2 newbies #BTSV please save me BTSV please save me BTSV PLEASE save me PLEASE please please please PLEASE BTSV youre my last hope.... #(arthur clenching his fist meme) ppl r Already so shitty 2 ppl w/ Messy Symtptoms i could Handle losing MK but SM2099 means too much 2 me..

[dutybcrne]

Kaeya once jokingly referred to Bennett as 'Bennett Guildson' in lightly scolding him over endangering himself, and Bennett most Definitely considered making that his actual name on his official Adventurer's Guild paperwork, send post-

#hc; kaeya #hc; bennett #//Forver love the idea of Kae saying smth to clown; and the person going Wait a sec; you COOKED here- #//And Kae just flounders and/or laughs his ass off bc WHY are you listening to me of all people; I wasn't SERIOUS 😅- #//Dude can handle people being Done with his clowning or rejecting it; but taking it Seriously and it ACTUALLY working well??? #//Dude would be both stunned but also flattered #//This case however; he was very much caught off guard #//This is a Very Impressionable Kiddo after all! #//However between the two of them; the name did stick. Kae will call him that in the typical Full Named By Mom fashion #//And Benny will introduce himself like that at the start of training or when they play up dramatics #//Benny DOES want to make it official; but Kae did gently talk him out of it. For the moment #//Bc Kae thought Bennet might regret taking it on later; so he ought to let him think on if he might want one of his dads' names instead #//But won't press any further if Benny truly does have his heart set on it. Low key is down to give Benny his own last name if he wants #//And would be so happy if he'd want to take it; bc the kid; like Klee and Noelle; is sb he's fond of like family #//Benny actually likes Guildson tho; bc it includes them ALL. He might even make it official on/near an upcoming father's day #//Keeps forgetting to tho. or losing the paperwork when he does get it

[ldobmm]

was only natural of me to make the teenage version of him since he is finally getting a proper google doc after a whole year and a half </3 too lazy to make a proper render now, but it will be in the doc

#he grew up well but #he really did experience chaos in its most #unadulterated form in every phase of his life #no wonder he looks so damn mean at 23 bro #hes a nice dude istg #he just has like... anger management issues bad #he conceals it well tho me thinks #anyway #might drop the doc when its all done #cause i dont think ive ever told his story on here? #its wild #its wonderful #simblr #OCVincent

[quietwingsinthesky]

wait when Metatron was talking about the archangels sending him in for reprogramming… he did just mean Michael & Raphael, right? There’s no way the timeline works it God is already gone but Lucifer was part of trying to control Metatron, cause God had to be there to get Lucifer in the Cage. And obviously Gabriel either left before or shortly after Lucifer got Caged, he couldn’t stick around.

why am i trying to puzzle out the timeline of a show that didn’t care about it

#tbc this is not coming from a ‘well here’s another thing we can’t blame Lucifer for’ place although. yeah? #but specifically from a ‘I think it’s funnier if Metatron holds this huge grudge against Heaven and The Archangels when really it was just #Raphael & Michael who did anything. lmao. lol even. what is wrong with this dude.’ #(also obviously the show doesn’t care. the show gave up on consistent timelines with the mark of Cain demon rewrite and God’s secret evil #sister no one ever mentioned and Lucifer’s crypts being a thing he totally had the power to create while he was at the time supposed to be #in his cage and Eve coming from ???????? in the timeline who made her did god make her does she just exist. spn doesn’t care.’ #BUT I CARE. I CARE ABOUT THE TIMELINE. I CARE ABOUT MAKING CHARACTERS MOTIVATIONS CONSISTENT. #I CARE! I CARE! screaming into an uncaring void. I CARE!)

[deus-and-the-machina]

ffxiv garlemald discourse is so funny because people will go "ugh people just cant stand it when things aren't black and white" and then you look at how the empire are portrayed in stormblood and shadowbringers and its like hm. that seems like a pretty intense and accurate display of violent imperialism to me! Wow I wonder why people in this day and age may find it hard to feel sympathy for them or even hate them on principal. god its such a mystery.

the games like 50/50 to me on how it tackles these themes because I actually like the garlemald arc in EW, I think it has a lot of horrific and powerful scenes depicting how self destructive fascist propaganda and beliefs are, but I also think it doesn't go far enough on some fronts. the garleans' xenophobia is most notably and obstacle to getting them to accept the contingent's help, which is what they're there to do,

but there's never an admission of harm from any garleans on the uuuuuuuuh massive amount of war crimes the nations around them are still suffering from they're just kind of like "we misjudged you...but you actually wanted to help us all along" like yeah thats great now can we get you all some deprogramming because you keep talking about returning to your prime and glory days and I think we need to unpack some stuff you really SHOULDNT return to. im not even really talking about EW proper but the patches where things are a bit more chilled out and people are recovering.

It feels like they wanted to have their critique of imperialism and also have things end with the beauty of human connection and reaching out and these things just don't mesh well because hey a lot of your modern day audience is not gonna like having to treat people yelling xenophobic things at the cast and your character with kid gloves after you showed them hours and hours of the awful things these people's beliefs have done. especially in the present day hoo boy.

#im kind of torn between 'no characters dont need to be 'punished' to be redeemed but also the characters just being so lenient with the #colonizers after we see far too many people being lenient if not supportive of the colonizers irl. well. it really blows afslkjfalkf and #yeah you can argue if they'd gone through with the garlemald expansion they would've had more time to go into this but the fact is that its #absent from what they did do and I especially think the patches when we go to garlemald and the EW role quests going 'hey maybe the #provinces can help us rebuild' as if they'd have any goddamn right to ask that just make me feel like they didnt stick the landing #seeing all the characters who have suffering time and time again bc of the garleans or seen the results of their actions having to clamp #their mouths shut every time someone said something xenophobic in EW isnt satisfying and it leaves so much unsaid! #also some people feel like the narrative didnt blame emet enough but ngl I think thats reductive even with his micromanaging scheming littl #ass and the intention of garlemald turning out a shitshow that doesnt make anyone else less complicit. most governments like this exaggerat #and lie and spread propaganda but I dont think most people here excuse the actions of a bigot because 'they were raised that way' #this is also my issue with gaius' writing. hes primarily upset that ascians were behind what he thought was his good old fashioned natural #conquering ideology :( and doesnt it suck so much he killed people for it. like yeah he seems pretty aware what he did was wrong but his #ideology remains bizarrely intact and unchallenged by the characters around him. no dude it wasnt just the ascians the system is a lot more #complex than that by this point aaaaaugh #final fantasy xiv #ffxiv #siren says #I hope people are nice to me about this I dont think I said anything particularly controversial to the Tumblr crowd (twt maybe but fuck em) #ig my main point with this post is that the game isnt perfect at writing this and also that look. I actually liked the main arc in EW and I #like quite a few garlean characters but I completely understand why others didnt like it or any garleans esp if they have their own persona #experiences with colonialism and I dont get to tell them they're invalid for that. too many people get judgmental about this understandably #upsetting topic and you just gotta accept that this is a big line for many people

[rivilu]

Ooo...

#arueshalae's quest... Delicious #i love it when companion quests not only are amazing in their own right but also allow room for me to expand on the pc... good shit #context-> i been thinking #since elluin died and came back very very wrong via botched wild hunt hunt or something of the sort #(dont ask me details this is all vague hc i only have the wiki to go off of for lore ) #just. where would his soul have landed if he had just died normally? #well. he's always been chaotic good. so #he should be at the club meme voice: he should be at elysium #something something the personification of the values Dimalchio abandoned staring him in the face #something about immortality granted through birth along with gifts unfathomable to mortals #versus immortality granted unwillingly. about the things one now considers trivial being what another was eternally barred from #something something envy something something rage #i cant wait to get here on azata path this is going to be JUICY to compare.... #ellu and arue are such a good pair to think about friendship wise in general... #trust me im talking about him more but mostly because it's a first run and im still developing him in my mind #but like dude... guy whose morals are the only part of himself he even considers vaguely salvageable #(even though he actually doesnt consider himself good- fun fact) #paired with girl trying desperately to learn and understand morality and undo the damage she did #also the fact that a bunch of the things elluin says to her he mostly says with the intent of putting some responsibility on the corrupted #which she instead interprets as him trying to absolve her of responsibility .. #i juist love them! #love them so much. throwing them in the microwave #(then there's also the azata-blooded assimar-shaped elephant in the room but im going to refrain from talking about him #because we dont have time to unpack aaaall that) #riv finds the path that sure is wrathfully righteous #oc: elluin

[meowonhao]

my ticket finally came!! 🩷

#i rarely have to use my full english name unless it’s stuff like this that i have to verify myself #and it always reminds me just how long it is ajshsbsjsk #like especially in korea but honestly even by like american standards #think it’s like 26 characters total including the two spaces since i have to do my first middle and last name 😅 #long ass line blacking it out taking up half the ticket #diamond life #anyways story time! #no one knows the stress interpark has put me through in the process of actualy receiving this ticket…. #was supposed to be mailed out like within a week of buying it #took forever to do that #Then they finally did like sometime last week and said expect it to come 3-5 days #and it came thru the post office and i was like okay probably next week because they don’t deliver on weekends #or so i thought #anyways that was like thursday i think? then i get a text like friday afternoon #saying oh we tried to call you to come deliver the ticket (bc i have to sign for it) but you didn’t answer so #even though i did not have a single call that wasn’t a saved number all day #so i immediately called the number that texted me and they were like well it’s too late to come today #(it was like 4pm) #and it’s about to be the weekend so we’ll come on monday just make sure you answer the phone this time #even though they literally never called me in the first place 🙄 #pretty sure they were just pretending so they could go home early on a friday ahsjsks #but the thing was. i wasn’t even expecting it until this upcoming week so they could have just waited and i never would have known #ANYWAYS so i was like okay fine i’ll make sure someone is here to get it on monday #tell me why i slept in bc it’s sunday and i don’t have rehearsal and i was woken up by a call #they’re like i’ll be coming to deliver your ticket in about an hour! #like it is literally sunday and you said you couldn’t deliver on weekends…..but whatever i was like oh 네 감사합니다 you know #then dude came like. 5 mins later i’m still basically half asleep and look like a mess #but anyways none of that really matters now bc i finally have my ticket but #it put me through so much unnecessary stress bc i’m always paranoid about stuff like this until i have it physically in my hand #even though i knew it was gonna come and be okay

[sux2be]

taking my heart out and stomping into the ground dont you dare get another friend crush. dont fucking do it.

#ITS SO FRUSTRATING !!!!! #i think someone is cool and then they pay an attention to me and i am lost #i am drawing them pics and making them little gifts and thinking about all the fun things we can do together #i spend my free time thinking of reasons to talk to them #u might be like hmm this sounds like a romantic crush #but i can assure it is not #it CAN turn into one over many years #i kno bc one did and i suffer even more for it #its Very Obvious bc when its a non-platonic crush i will get suuuuuper possesive and jealous #but UGH friend crushes suck especially bc i dont have the bandwidth to rly pursue them AND #i always feel like i come at it too intensely so in order to escape rejection i run #its fine i am fine i can be Normal about things #its okay i will hide from this one like ive done all the others #its this person named Toad and they are so cool they do like climate activisim and they support local punk bands #its also reminding me of Dev. i am so sorry dev. #he was this super cool ass dude that i worked with for 4 years and he was So Neat and interesting to talk to #he knew soooooo much about cooking and he was really well read #and his humor was great. super dry and sarcastic i was always laughing lol #i wanted to be friends with him SO BAADDD #and he has no social media or even like. texting #so before i left i demanded his email address #and I emailed him One time and he replied and i ghosted him #bc here is another issue: i cant fucking communicate #how keep friends if u dont talk to them???? #anyways the brain worms are eating good tonight

[ronanlynchbf]

hell day today and i'm only two hours into my EIGHT HOUR SHIFT

#9 to 5 by dolly parton starts playing in the background.. #literally had to open up shop alone 2day and also was entirely alone for the first 45 min. of my shift so that was already a negative start #to the day + i heard that i can't have my break later than two thirty which is very bad for me bc 1) there'll be a lot of ppl all around me #when i'm eating which i already dislike and 2) like 85% of ppl taking their break around that time are VERY noisy eaters so even worse and #then 3) it'll be really loud in the room as well bc everyone's talking loudly and eating and the cutlery's clanging against plates and such #and also some ppl have actual full-blown arguments with each other in the break room bc half the ppl here hate each other's guts so more #negatives to the day and then on top of that we've had sooooo many annoying customers already today who r just. intent on making u stressed #out and upset and literally will tell u to your face to 'do your job better' like bro...i can easily tell you haven't worked in retail.... #also someone hung their clothes on the rack outside the fitting rooms which is where u hang ur clothes when you're DONE fitting them & don' #want them bc they don't fit or don't sit right or u just don't rlly like them after all so if clothes are hanging there we the ppl working #there WILL take them and hang them back in their original places what did u expect to happen?? anyway someone hung the clothes they had #tried on already and did want there and i reached out to take them bc like. that's what we do here..we hang the clothes on the 'discard #rack' back in the store bc else the rack gets stuffed and the woman literally grabbed my arm and said 'those are mine what do u think you'r #doing' LIKE?????? GIRL THE RACK'S THERE FOR A REASONNNN ofc i'm going to assume u don't want them anymore if they're hanging there that's #why it's called the DISCARD rack....also how am i to know those specific clothes are yours HONESTLYYYYYY STFU AND GET OFF ME #ALSO some dude was like (to his child but like. looking at me while he said it.) 'this guy needs a haircut doesn't he' bc my hair is kinda #long and apparently i passed today. LIKE 1st of all kind of a rude thing to say to a stranger innit 2nd of all setting a great example to #your child there just casually commenting on other ppl's looks like that👍 3rd of all jokes on you you wouldn't consider me a guy if #you Knew most likely. thanks for that little zing of glee much obliged <3 but also man just piss off will you. 4th of all my hair isn't eve #that long....like the ends of it are just shy of my shoulders wdym LONG if u knew the long-haired guys i know you'd faint. #anyway. great start of the day. i still have six more hours to go 🥴 #ALSO no surprise this always happens but my legs already hurt SOOOOOOOO BADDDDDD :((((((((((( #r.txt

[meatmensch]

The people that have abandoned me really need to stop talking to me like they have any right to tell me what to do, or I swear to God, I'm gonna get the FUCKING hammer.

#inspired by my bitch of a mother sending me a text that basically said u need to get ur life together #as i always say! LET HE WHO IS WITHOUT SIN CAST THE FIRST STONE! #this woman's life is a dumpster fire #and she specifically said 'i won't financially support u. i'll always be there for u but that's a conditional statement' #which is INSANE because that don't make no sense AND she has NEVER financially supported me? genuinely why does she think she has any #fucking right...😭😭😭 #meanwhile. my dad. during the shitstorm that has been my family's existence lately. is being way more lax about me getting a job and moving #out than he has been in the past. because some fucks despite being shitheads aren't total assholes #this post is also inspired by my insufferable sister who fucked off to another fucking continent when i was 7 and treats me...well. exactly #how u would expect an upper middle class dumb jock to treat her awesome nerd little brother. and is always telling me i'm making #the wrong fucking decisions and judging me. #these ppl r so funny bc they think this is normal and that i will endure it bc the power of love or what the fuck ever. wrong! i have been #on the brink of cutting off my entire family since i was fourteen. now that i actually have the power to do some cutting off i'll be honest #i feel pretty great #it is all of course a horrible nightmare and i wish things were different etc etc etc. but in the words of supernatural. i was always going #to end up here. #while i am thinking about such things what's my other sister's deal? she has not reached out to me for years. it was like i turned 18 and #she was like ok who cares abt this dude now #which was incredibly bizarre and makes me feel like a stupid idiot who did something wrong but i know i didn't. and she was always the most #supportive of my siblings. i don't know what her problem is #in her defense her life has been weird lately. but 'lately' has lasted long enough that it's just her life now. and whenever i try to be th #one to reach out she basically gives me...nothing. #while i am thinking about such things i will acknowledge the slays. my one totally kickass sister who is the only other one of my siblings #who understands anything. i am rly grateful for her and she has been so good to me for so long especially during the recent shitstorm #she is moving very far away and that has brought up my abandonment issues but i genuinely am so happy for her and her family and she is ver #adamant about me visiting and PAYING for the visit (or at least doing the scamming that pays for the visit so i don't have to pay lol) and #making sure i'll be ok. #it's not all bad! i am going to be ok! there r so many people in my life who love me and love me in a way that makes sense to me and doesn' #make me feel like the world's worst man #personal log