#FFUCK I’M EMOTIONAL

[wawrthur]

“Ah, f-ffuck, Eddie,” Steve’s eyes shut tightly and he felt a tear overspill and trail down his cheek. He contemplated holding it in but in the end a sob made it through, and Eddie’s concerned face appeared from between his legs.

“Are you okay?”

Steve reached down to stroke Eddie’s brow in reassurance. “Yeah, I’m just – I’m feeling a lot at the moment.”

Eddie’s eyes gleamed tender with trust and love. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah,” Steve smiled, and drew in a stuttering breath. “If you don’t mind my crying noises while you are going down on me, you can continue.”

“Only if you’re crying in the weeping statue of Mary way,” Eddie grinned.

“Huh?”

“Head so good you’re seeing god,” Eddie winked at him and Steve huffed a laugh.

“I thought you were an atheist.”

“Well, by technical terms, that would be a Satanist,” Eddie corrected. “I believe in bodily autonomy, equal rights, freedom of choice and I listen to metal.”

“You forgot performing Satanic rituals in your basement every weekend,” Steve smiled.

“Ah, yes, my DnD group. Hell yeah, roll a twenty and there you go, gotta blow the devil.”

“Is that how you got so good at this?” Steve teased.

“Oh, you have no idea, big boy,” Eddie got a cheeky glint in his eye, wrapping his arms around Steve’s thighs and licking his lips. “Call you Holy Mary cause you’re about to weep, it will feel so good.”

“Is that a promis – ah!” Steve threw his head back as Eddie disappeared between his thighs once again, working his tongue in a way that made Steve’s whole body tremble. He regretted not having a headboard to lean against, kneeling in the middle of the bed with Eddie sprawled underneath.

Steve reached down to cover Eddie’s hands with his own, gripping hard as his breath quickened, matching the speed of him rocking his hips, and once again he felt the prickling in his eyes because it felt so good, and Eddie was so gentle, and hot, and Steve loved him so fucking much, and –

Another sob rippled through his chest but this time, he didn’t even consider holding it back. Steve’s chest heaved, tears streaming down his cheeks as he got closer and closer, and it felt so good to let go, so fucking good to not have to be a big boy and big boys don’t cry and can you please stop it’s so weird; it felt freeing to be this vulnerable with someone, trusting them not to call him weak or pathetic or make fun of him for having emotions.

Steve pressed down and Eddie moaned, squeezing Steve’s thighs in encouragement and drawling a loud “mhmmmm”, mouth too busy to speak.

“Eddie, fuck, Eddie, I’m going to come.” That sounded way more high-pitched and whiny than Steve had intended but it seemingly went straight to Eddie’s dick because he started bucking his hips while sucking Steve off with renewed vigour.

Small, needy noises made their way out of Steve’s mouth as he jerked, once, once more and cried out with his head thrown back, Eddie sucking and licking and touching him all the way through his orgasm.

Steve couldn’t stay upwards a second longer. He fell down next to Eddie, looking up at him when Eddie moved closer. His boyfriend reached out to stroke his cheek.

“Just like Holy Mary, Mary on a, Mary on a cross,” Eddie sang softly with a tender smile.

“I’m pretty sure in that case, I’m the one who’s supposed to be going down on you,” Steve responded dreamily, still in a foggy daze.

“There’s still time,” Eddie grinned. “Besides,” he added, “I’m supposed to worship you since you are the holy one.”

“I thought you were a Satanist?” Steve pulled Eddie closer.

“I can make an exception,” Eddie licked his lips. “You are just too delicious not to.”

Steve laughed. “You sound like you’re about to eat me!”

“Just did,” Eddie winked, “But yeah, I could eat you up, Steve Harrington. I’d start with your ass,” Eddie reached down and stressed his point by kneading Steve’s buttcheek.

“You’re so fucking weird, Eddie Munson,” Steve shook his head with a smile.

“Well, haven’t you heard? I’m the freak,” Eddie stuck out his tongue and opened his eyes wide.

“I fucking love you, you freak,” Steve said, catching Eddie’s tongue with his and pulling him into a kiss. Eddie passionately reciprocated. After a few minutes, Steve broke the kiss to Eddie’s audible displeasure. “You are right, I do taste good. Now, how about you?”

“Wanna find out?” Eddie smirked.

“Let’s see how sweet the forbidden fruit really is,” Steve mused, flipping them over and kissing a trail down Eddie’s torso.

“Ooooh, kinky,” Eddie put the tip on his finger in his mouth while holding eye contact with Steve. They both giggled.

“You’re such a freak, Eddie,” Steve said fondly, shaking his head, and closed his mouth on Eddie.

“Y-you, ah, fuck, love it, Harrington,” Eddie threw his head back, his fingers in Steve’s hair, pulling, petting, scratching as Steve moved his head up and down.Steve’s only response was a very, very muffled “I do”.

#eddie x steve #steddie #steddie fic #stranger things fanfiction #trans eddie munson #trans steve harrington #dacryphilia

[blurrymango]

I need to get ffucked I can’t just jack off to slasher smut forever oh my god. I need a real living breathing person pounding into me WHY AM I NAUSEOUS AND ON THE VERGE OF TEARS????????????? WHAT?

Ugh. No one in their right mind would ever ffuck me I’m just a goddamn over-emotional narcissistic childish tranny fatass. FFUCKING HELL BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH.

Hehe. Typing out swear words is fun. Ffucking cocksucker whore bitch slut asshole dick cock pussy cunt shit piss motherffucker. IT’S FUNNY!!! 

Ugh.

#mango man speaks

[69dias]

fresh linen [jjk, 4/?]

a/n: hi guys!!!! this is post-makeout sesh, hehe. unfortunately, no OC getting slutted out cuz i’m not ovulating anymore. oh well!

w/c: 2.5k

warnings: uh. emotions. lots of em. honorary daddy issues mention !! mentions of alcohol as well. tons. 

jaykay: bbaby [23:10]

jaykay: imw fuvkinh sordy [23;10]

jaykay: tlel me whwt I hahe to do darking [23:10]

jaykay: ill sell my gyutar idonr care i wany you bacj soooooooooooo bafly babyyytyy [23:18]

jaykay: dollfsce mylove I love you I love you I love you [23:20]

jaykay: seeeee i speltthrm out perfetcoly cuz i fuckind loveuuiouuuuuuu im so ffucking sorft I didnt tell dyuouyy [00:57]

jaykay: bbabyyyyyyyy comebback. cokegte me I’m drunjkk [01:20]

jaykay: im slonr. im loneljyydyyyy come get me baby…. Lemem hold u. I miss your boobs and I wann fuck you and inmjssuuouyyyyu i love you. i love you [01:45]

the thing about receiving drunk texts is that you cannot decide whether to believe that ‘drunk words are sober feelings’, or to pass off everything as him being too inebriated to think right. the latter makes more sense because one thing you’ve learned while dating jungkook is that when he’s drunk, he’s drunk, and there’s a very high chance that he didn’t fully understand the things he was typing over the taste of bitter whiskey — because it had to be whiskey — on his tongue, and sent them out for some company. he did say it, after all, he wanted to fuck you, missed your body, missed you so bad.

but there’s this inkling inside of you, a jungkook sized hole that he left in your heart  that pulsates at the thought of his words reigning even a little true;

he loves you.

he’s sorry he didn’t ever tell you.

he loves you.

jungkook loves you. present tense, no take-backs. he’s said it multiple times in the series of messages, confessing his love, singing out his apologies, asking for you back. saying he’d sell his guitar for you, a sentence that doesn’t fail to remind you of being in the trunk of his rover, watching the stars when he’d said that to you for the first time, that he’d sell his guitar and burn the tattoos off his arms if you wanted him to. was that also a profession of love, or was he just sweet talking you then? or does he love you, had he loved you and been afraid to say it all this time, vulnerability having engulfed him whole and pushed him into a labyrinth of his own worst fears as he ran away from you, thinking he’d reached the exit when he came back out the entrance, just a little bit more fucked up than he used to be?

jungkook loves you.

and the scariest thing is, that you know you love him back. you cite a couple of moments for when you knew, because it’s never just one thing. it’s never just finding someone’s eyes across the room, or kissing them under the rain and realizing this is it, no. no. love is nuanced and if you’ve never been in love, it’s hard to put a name to the feeling, it’s hard to even understand that what you’re feeling is love, and when you do, it has the potential to set you off, like it had jungkook, and send you running away from how painfully good, how scarily new it all feels.

for you, it was a series of things, a series of possible realizations — the feeling of his russet curls under your fingers when he’d fallen asleep on your lap after practice (November 15th), the way he’d bought a mistletoe from Daiso and hung it up on his rear-view mirror (December 24th), the feeling his taut abdomen when he’d grabbed your cold hands to warm them under his shirt (January 7th), how he’d kissed the apple of your cheek the first thing in the morning (January 11th), how he got hot easily, so he pulled one arm out when cuddling you to sleep so you’d still have the blanket on you (February 2nd) and when your eyes had met across the club on that fateful March night.

love.

you still love him, and you’re sure of it, because while many cite love as being the purest feeling, many say love is a person who makes you feel at home, many call it a calmness in facing the future with someone, you disagree with all these notions because to you, loving someone is willingly handing over all your inhibitions and letting them destroy every single piece of you and knowing that you’d go back to them because they’ll put all those pieces back together anyways. and you wouldn’t put it past jungkook, not even for a second, to fix you up if you went running back to him now.

he smelled like warm vanilla, you still remember because you love him. he washed his hair every single day and made you blow dry it and card your fingers through his curls at night because he couldn’t fall asleep without it, you remember because you love him. he told you that you reminded him of strawberry season, you remember because you love him. he hated his dad, you remember because you love him. he never got vulnerable until he cried into one of your sweaters while sorting through your closet because it reminded him of one his mother used to have, you remember because you love him. he was a man, and he was just a little broken and that wasn’t an excuse but you loved him then and you love him now and he tore you apart a million times but a series of drunken messages numbed the pain that had been ebbing away at the corner of your chest for 3 months now. he was a man, and you loved him and you never told him either because you were scared too, but never scared enough to chase him away.

and you love him, love, love, love him. you love him, you love jeon jungkook, and you love him so much that you ignore every screaming warning siren in your head telling you not to, and you let yourself dial the phone.

he picks up in two rings.

“jungkook.”

a sob, a hiccup, and then another sob.

“you called. i love you.”

drunk words are just sober thoughts, drunk words are just sober thoughts, he loves you, he just said he loves you. he loves you. drunk words are just sober thoughts, drunk words are just sober thoughts, drunk words — he loves you.

to hear it from his voice, his saccharine sweet honey voice laced with a coat of thick whiskey induced drunkenness, to hear him cry because he missed you, cry because he loves you, it cuts through the white noise you’ve forced yourself to play on loop in your brain as a barrier between the silence and your thoughts and fuck, it feels freeing to get silence back. especially when he says it again.

“I love you, my baby. I love you, I’m sorry for everything —“ a hiccup. his lips is evident whenever he apologizes, another nuance that shows just how drunk he is right now and it almost tempts you into hanging up because he probably doesn’t mean it. “im sorry for the party thing. I’m sorry I — fuck. that I- I broke up over a fucking text —“ a sob, and then another broken hiccup, and then silence.

“jungkook, baby. drink some water, okay?”

“I’ll do whatever you want, please come back —“ a hiccup cuts him off and he seems to swallow wryly, trying to sober himself up.

“jungkook, baby. drink some water, okay?”

there’s a million things you want to say, but you just don’t. maybe it’s because you’re afraid that he’s trying to trap you, trying to fake this vulnerability so he has you wrapped around his finger again, or maybe you just don’t have it in you to accept that he’s telling the truth.

“baby —“ he sounds a little hoarse, a little out of breath, and if you could break past the space time continuum to reach through the phone and grab his face in your hands, wipe his tears away and hold him in your lap and tell him that it’s all forgiven, you would. “I’m sorry, will you forgive me?”

yes, yes. it’s all forgiven. come over, but don’t drive. i love you.

“sober up, jungkook.”

he sobs again, and you want to pull every strand of hair off your head for making him feel this small.

“i was scared, I’d die for you. I’ll never walk into — into another bar and I’ll stop drinking and-and, I’ll never—“ a soft sigh of his own cuts him off this time. “I’ll never forget to pick you up or be mean and I won’t let go and I’ll do it right this time, please.”

okay baby. i know you’ll do me right this time, i know you’re better. you were just scared, weren’t you? I know you were. I’m sorry i walked out, I’m sorry i said you didn’t treat me right.

“my baby,”

you wait for his slight hum to continue, and your heart feels like it’s ready to combust inside of you when he lets out a little giggle.

“baby, we can talk when you’re sober, okay?”

don’t hang up, please. I’m here, put the whiskey down and come to me, jungkook

he laughs, and it’s a bit hollow and it leaves your heart feeling the same way. hollow, empty, a bit worn down from all the work it’s having to do.

“thank you for calling, ___”

“thank you for picking up, jungkook.”

the thing about breaking up, the thing about being in love, is that things change so easily. January of this year, you would be a bit trepidatious in admitting your love for him, but you were deep in it; summer flew by and autumn left you knee deep in winter and both you and, maybe him, as well, were on your way to the climax, the first love confession, but neither of you had the guts or the clarity to get there. and here you are, 3 months later and both of you have said it, both of you know, and it’s over a drunken phone call after you nearly hooked up in a fraternity house bathroom that you affirmed it and you don’t know how to feel. you don’t know if it goes up from here, if he’d even want to speak to you fully sober. you don’t know, and you’re not ready to find out, so you hope that he’s too drunk to remember this tomorrow. and it’s a little scary how fast things have changed so maybe, just maybe, if jungkook does forget, you’re alright with deleting the messages and keeping this night to yourself. maybe.

but for now, the tattoo of pain he placed for you right on your chest sears through your skin and you wonder if that imprint will ever stop burning the way it does, and you wonder if you should get yourself a glass of whiskey as well. maybe it’ll feel like his lips on yours, and maybe it’ll remind you of just how much you love him, and if he even does at all.

///

jungkook doesn’t regret it. he’ll cut the long explanations short because he’s done denying these things and blaming them on the alcohol and maybe he needs to stop drinking but he does not regret it.

he doesn’t think he has it in him to regret anything anymore, but the usual fleeting panic that flashes across his face the morning after he chooses to drown his own sorrows in a bottle of scotch doesn’t last very long this time. there, is, however a weird pressing in his stomach that makes him feel like he’s going to throw up, and he just passes it off as the beginnings of a hangover.

but he doesn’t regret it, no. he remembers your voice, soft honey searing into his brain when you’d spoken to him, so gentle and so soft even after he’d wrecked your whole being and then tried to hook up with you afterwards. he loves you, and it’s out in the air and he has one-upped his father and it’s not the best time to be celebrating that but he doesn’t regret telling you, and he’s almost giddy at the prospect of speaking to you again.

that is, until the alcohol wears off sometime in the afternoon, and he’s sat, throbbing head in his hands as he wonders what the hell he’s gotten himself into.

does he love you? he’s certain. there’s proof, in your shirts in his closet and the paint on his dashboard that he’s sealed onto the material, in the way you taste like his whiskey and his mind is still fuzzy with the remnants of your kiss a few days back. it’s in the way he got out of his car that night and walked to the bus stop instead, knowing you’d tell him off for driving even a little drunk, and it’s in the way he heard your voice last night that reminded him of how he let go of the one real thing he’d ever known and then had the nerve to clear your messages out like they weren’t the only thing keeping him sane.

jungkook, maybe, was a bit too hasty in winning over his father, because he’s almost certain he can’t speak to you without the mask of an ice cold drink running warm through his blood. whether it’s because you make him nervous, or because he, after all the thinking he’s done, is still a little afraid of open vulnerability, he can’t quite place but he knows he’s deathly afraid of looking you in the eyes again; especially when there’s nothing that clouds his vision or makes him see double.

so jungkook ignores it all, like he does best, and let’s his head fall heavy on the soft pillow on his couch, also ignoring the heavy scent of fresh linen and strawberries on it, also ignoring how you used to lay your head on this exact pillow and let him tuck his body against yours over and over and over — he needs to speak to you. it’s a promise you’ve made, and you’re nothing like him, and he’s recited it like a mantra, that you deserve a better version of him, someone who can treat you with more than lousy kisses under fake mistletoes and breakup text messages and he picks up his phone even if his head is about to kill him for ever choosing to drink and he types out a message because fuck it, jungkook.

fuck you, jungkook, you love her. you love her and you miss the way she smells and it’ll be awkward and staring at her sober will make you want to bash your skull in for ever looking into her pretty eyes and deciding that you didn’t need them in your life anymore and you’ll feel like shit the entire time but at least you’ll talk to her.

at least she’ll know it wasn’t drunken shit you were spewing in her ear at an ungodly hour. at least she’ll know you don’t regret it.

///

jaykay: my love, I’m sorry. [14:20]

jaykay: let’s talk, please? I’m sober now, i slept, and I’m sober and I can talk. [14:21]

#jungkook #jungkook/reader #jungkook x reader #bts jungkook #jungkook drabbles #jungkook au #jungkook smut #jungkook series #bts #fresh linen

[logically-asexual]

ladybug had made me emotional but not to the point of crying but now i’m rewatching some episodes and Queen Wasp just ……. made me sob the ugliest sobs and had tears running down my face and i have this ache in my chest that hurts it actually hurts like… how dare they. the ffuck

#i can’t even point at what exactly made me cry #just. everything #gabriel you son of a bitch i love you #miraculous ladybug spoilers

[dirk-rider]

We are definitely not making finals because my partner doesn’t know our fucking lines and she’s been crying all day and I feel bad but also fuck, man, I’ve got shit goin too and instead I’m playin emotional support and theres so much noise in this building I thought I found somewhere quiet and some little shits found me and now they’re sitting next to me talking so ffucking loudly and I’m nearly completely physically nonverbal I cannot bring myself to speak I want to go the fuck home‼️‼️

[jinglingeyes]

That post about making content or your brain will explode is making too much sense fuck I’m not happy or okay

IM GOING TO FUCKING EXPLIDE LIKE Aaaaaaaaaaa fFUCK I CANT WRITD

THIS ISNT FAIR EEEEEEEERGGVFGHJJ

I DONT NOT LIKE THIS FEELING OR EMOTION

#uhhhh what do i tag this

[unitedunionofdave]

IT’S 4:21 AM HELP

#FFUCK I’M EMOTIONAL #I’M LISTENING TO ‘HOME’ PHILIP PHILLIPS ON REPEAT AND GOD I AM HAVING *FEELINGS EMOTIONS* #I LOVE YOU GUYS????????? #I WANT TO GO THE MALL WITH ALL OF YOU AND HAVE A BULLSHIT TIME TOGETHER #AND I WANT TO GO ON ROAD TRIPS AND WATCH MOVIES AND STAY UP TIL 7AM TALKING ABOUT EVERYTHING #YOU GUYS ARE SOME OF THE BEST THINGS THAT HAVE HAPPENED TO ME LATELY AND AS BS AS THE SERVER WAS WHEN IT STARTED #I THINK I AM SO THANKFUL FOR UUOD?? YOU GUYS HAVE HELPED ME THROUGH THE WEIRDEST TIME IN MY LIFE #AND I’M JUST. IMAGINING ALL OUR DELTA KIDS CHILLIN TOGETHER AROUND LIKE. A CAMPFIRE TO THIS SONG #AND INFNFJFKNDNF :HESDEAD: #I LOVE YOU GUYS #AND YOU’RE ALL INCREDIBLE AND I NEED TO GO TO BED #BUT IT’S OK IT’S FINE. IT’S OK. I WILL PASS OUT EVENTUALLY. JESUS FUCK #AAUUGGUGGHHHGG. <3 /P #THIS IS IT. THIS IS THE FOUND FAMILY I’VE ALWAYS FUCKING WANTED 😭😭 #HHGGHRGHJGVHJJHGG #uuod #mod dave #karkat.txt

[scaredpigeons]

Satoru Gojo is touch starved.

Warnings: explicit content, 18+ MDNI. Gojo x reader, no pronouns or gendered language used for reader. Smut, dom(ish)!reader sub(ish)!gojo. Minor dacryphilia, fluff. Not edited, just wrote this down now lol. Reader calls gojo “little dove” and “angel”

—————————

From the moment Satoru Gojo could turn on his infinity, it was protecting him nearly constantly. He could never let his guard down, not even for a moment—Lest the world lose it’s greatest sorcerer. It was always there. It was as natural as breathing to him at this point, but just like every other aspect of his life; you challenged his walls, tore at them with your delicate hands until he finally gave you the satisfaction of being right every single time.

Satoru Gojo had not truly felt the touch of another person since he was an infant. Sure, he could feel things, the breeze on his skin when he towers above the rest of the world, young megumi’s heels digging into his collar bones when he used to hoist the boy on his shoulders, the astounding warmth radiating from Yuuji as he patted the young man on the back. But it all was just faux pressure, the microscopic infinity between he and the rest of the world just pushing against him, against others. A blank being filled in with lesser senses.

Satoru Gojo could say with the utmost certainty that he has never felt more afraid of anything in his recollective history. It wasn’t you— no, never you. He trusted you whole heartedly, without hesitation. You’d seen him broken, you’ve known what he’s lost—what he loses each second of each day carrying the burden and responsibility of his gifts. He can’t hide from you, you see through each facade, call him out on every trick, every fib, and even through you’ve seen first hand what kind of… thing he is capable of being, you never falter in your devotion. So he could never fear you, but he feared the vulnerability you poured from him. He feared his heart beating and the “I’ll do it.” That fell so easily from his lips because for you, of course he would.

Satoru Gojo would do anything for you. So when the doors were locked, and the wards were up, and the world was silent save for the two of you, he only hesitated for a moment. His crystalline eyes churned and swirled with violent emotion, and you smiled at him, because of course you would.

“You’re safe with me,” You whispered. “I would never let anything happen to you.”

“I know, I know,” He said. “Just thinking about what flavour mochi I’m going to have you buy me as a reward for all this good behaviour.”

“Mhm,” you teased, that colourful glint in your eye shining through. (the one that made him fall for you, the one that sparkled when you took his teasing and gave it right back to him— like he deserves.) “You’re stalling, and you’re being cute about it because the world would collapse if the Satoru Gojo took anything serious more than twice a year.”

“Hey now, I take things very seri-“

You cut him off with a gentle kiss, running your hands along his forearms that were sat on either side of him on the armrests of the chair.

“You can let go now, little Dove.” You whispered against his lips. “I’ll catch you if you fall.”

He waited until your hands left his bare arms, until you stood back straight and stepped between his spread legs, until you nodded gently and smiled even more so.

Turning it off completely felt strange. Satoru felt naked, bare, and vulnerable. There was no breeze in the little void youd created for this moment, yet the air on his skin felt crisp and strong. He was nearing a panic at the overwhelming reality that was swirling around him until your hands gently came to cup his face.

The noise that bubbled from his throat was something akin to a whimper crossed with a sharp moan, and you swore you saw something jump between his legs.

“Fuck, ff-ffuck.” He gasped, eyes wide as you slid your hands down his jawline to his throat, running your fingertips along his arteries, his Adam’s apple, his esophagus.

His body had started to vibrate in the chair, and in the back of his mind he wonders if he should have reconsidered the lack of restraints.

“Is it too much for you sweet boy?” You cooed, running your fingertips gently up and down the sides of his neck. “You say the word, and we can stop.”

“N-no.” He whimpered. “No, please don’t stop, please don’t stop.”

He was shirtless, donning only a pair of his most comfortable sweatpants in preparation for this, and as you ran your hands down his arms, back up and around his shoulders only to rest on top of his pectorals, he yelped and squirmed.

“Please,” he begged. “It f-feels… it feels so good.”

“Yeah?” You slid your right hand down, dragging over each abdominal before resting at the tent that had formed, a small wet spot soaking through the gray fabric where the head of his cock pressed against it. “Is that why you’re so hard?”

“No… no.” Tears formed at his lashline, spilling out onto his flushed cheeks as you tapped a single finger over his clothed cock.

“No?” You mused as you tucked your fingers in the waistband of his sweats, smirking as he lifted to help you slip them off even through his shaking head and whines.

His cock stood tall and free, nearly slapping back at his stomach. It was more strained that you’d ever seen before, its tip flushed an angry red as opposed to the pretty pink it usually was, and that thick vein on the underside looked like it was ready to burst. The amount of pre-cum nearly gushing from the tip was what astounded you the most though, it was leaking all over him and slipping down along his shaft, as if each breath caused another bead of the fluid to spill into the mess.

“Why are you so hard and wet then, Angel?” You smiled when he flushed at the nickname, typically only used by him when in the throes of passion, calling you his sweet angel, his perfect, precious treasure sent from heaven. (“if heaven even exists,” he’d said with a teasing smirk. “You’d have been created there just for me.”)

“Y-you.” He whispered, and his words started to slur a bit. “It’s cuz’ve you.”

Unable to think of anything else you’d rather do, you kissed him then. Deep and filthy and filled with every ounce of love and passion that was pouring from you. He moaned into your mouth, blue eyes rolling into white as the sensation of your tongue against his sent an orgasm rushing through him. His cock jumped, splattering his milky white skin with his cum, dripping down his abs as you kissed him through it, devouring each delicious noise he gave you.

“Holy—“ he inhaled a deep and stuttering breath, “—F-fuckk.”

“Was that okay? Are you okay Satoru?” You looked into his dazed eyes, tears drying on his red cheeks.

“Can…” his head wobbled as he regained focus, and a lazy lopsided grin spread across his face. “Can we do that again?”

#gojo smut #gojo x reader #gojo x reader smut #gn reader #gojo x gender neutral reader #no pronouns #or gendered language for reader #touched starved gojo #sub gojo #tw: dacryphilia #gojo cums untouched #jjk smut #jjk #jjk satoru #satoru gojo x reader #gojo satoru #satoru #satoru gojo smut #fluff and smut

[equizona]

ZONATALKS, PART 1

VENTI!NG POST, FUCKING READ IT >:(

Okay so, this is my venting post about how shitty our society is.

So point one

Black Lives Matter

Okay so listen up here ya little racist shittards >:(

Why the FUCK do you think BLACK poeple are BELLOW you? Why cuz your skin is pale and weak? Fucking cunts-

Anyways

BLACK LIVES FUCKING MATTER

And now dont get me wrong, I understand perfectly well that humans are a fearful creature. We fear the unknown and I know things we aren't familiar with scares us. But WE HAVE EVOLVED, y'all dont need to be scared of people who are literally the exact same as you.

And for my other point

JUST BECAUSE I DONT KNOW THE FUCKING DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A KOREAN PERSON AND A CHINESE PERSON, IT DOESN'T MAKE ME RACIST SIMPLY BECAUSE IM WHITE

I want you to put a swedish, Danish and Norwegian together and see if you can see the difference right over the bat. I bet you cant you racist shit- anyways

JUST BECAUSE I CANT TELL WHAT COUNTRY YOUR FROM, IT AIN'T MAKING ME RACIST CUZ IM WHITE fOr fUcKs sake I ain't even completely white you fucking loser-

Anyways

BLACK LIVES MATTER

BLACK MEN MATTER

BLACK WOMEN MATTER

BLACK OTHER GENDERS MATTER

Because yes there is more than one gender and people can change their gender

PRIDE

Now pride is a very big community, and I just so happened to be within this community.

And now, stop being ffucking homophobic or transphobic people.

Now let me ask you, were you born with straight hair but you wanted curly hair? Or mabye you were born with brown eyes but wanted blue eyes? PEOPLE AREN'T ALWAYS BORN AS OR WITH BEING WHAT THEY WANT OR WHAT THEY FEEL COMFTABLS WITH

Meaning if you can change what you look like, they can change their fucking gender. And you can get your fUCKInG AsS oUT oF HeRE-

Anyways onwards to sexuality

FUCK OFF

WHO PEOPLE LIKE DONT HAVE SHIT TO DO WITH YOU UNLESS THEY LIKE YOU

AND IF YOU HAVE A HOMOPHOBIC BITCHY PERSONALITY, I CANT PROMISE YOU

THEY DON'T

So just shut up we dont want ur opinion we can simp for whoever the fuck we want >:v

Also can I just say, that humans are the only thing who dont support gay people? Gay animals is a thing, and animals totally support other animals liking the same gender, humans are just fucking retards

This being me to my next thingy:

Anti-vaxxers

YALL DONT GET VACCINED CUZ YOU DONT WANNA GET RETARDED?

WELL LET ME TELL YOU, YOU BEING AGAISNT VACCINES MAKES YOU RETARDED SO YOUR A BIT TO LATE FOR THAT AINT YA?

That's that, all I have to say

Anywats

SEXISM

Ah yes

Sexism

Which is still a fucking thing thank you

Anyways

I can totally understand where people where coming from in the past, they believed women were born weaker

BUT WE AINT

AND IVE BEATEN THE SHIT OUT OF SO MANY BOYS LEMME JUST TELL YOU

So

Women are not bellow you men.

We are above you.

Because you had the audacity to believe someone was bellow you for something so fucking useless, we now have the right to see you as bellow us

But we wont uwu

As long as your not a little shit like I dont give no fucks bout ur gender if ur going to give me shiT-

Anyways

STOP SHAMING WOMEN FOR BREASTFEEDING THEIR CHILDREN

Abortion

Now listen up

People are out there breastfeeding their children and you guys make it seem wrong, you sexualize it and so much more

Lemme just tell you

If you do that, and your against abortion

Go fuck youself

Cuz your basically saying a mother should let her child starve because you can't be a decent human being and control yourself

So, if your against a woman "killing" a living being that hasn't even developed a brain yet, I want you to shut your trap about a woman doing her best to take care of her child now that it actually is a living being that has developed a brain and emotions

Got it? Got it.

Anyways

Not everyone is like that

But saying women cant get an abortion is wack

Women are people that have had lives, developed a brain and emotions, and either factors. A baby inside her womb that's under 3 months, has not.

Meaning the 'baby' is not a living being with emotions yet, the mother is. And yet you completely ignore the mothers emotions, that do exist, and chose to chose a being without emotions above that. Fucking stupid is what you are >:((((

NO

I AM NOT DONE

BUT THIS ISN'T MY LAST FUCKING POST EITHER SO Y'ALL BETTER STIP BEING RETRADS AND LISTEN TO ME >:V

FUCKING READ THIS, NEXT TIME ON ZONA-TALKS yes I'm naming it zonatalks thank you THEN I'LL BE BRINING UP OTHER FACTORS SUCH AS BULLYING

Thanks for coming to my Ted talk okay bye-

#blm #black lives matter #humans are fucking stupid #sexism #stop sexism #abortion #abortion is legal and good and okay #anti vaxxers #scared of being a retard? #you already are #fucking whores- #transphobic? #go die in a ditch #homophobic? #I'll cut of your dick

[blurrymango]

My most toxic relationship was one that lasted for 9ish years.

On and off again with her,

We were best friends sometimes, able to confide in eachother.

Until I went and screwed up the relationship.

So many times,

She's told me I'm manipulative,

That I use my emotions to get people to do what I want,

That I guilt trip others,

And that I care about no one but myself,

And that I'm always starting fights with her.

And everytime,

We'd break it off for a few months.

And then she'd give me another chance

And it would be the best thing ever.

Until it isn't

And she decides it's not worth it again

And I cry.

So ffucking much

And I hate her.

#mango man speaks

[noonas-kpop-fix]

You are the cause of my Euphoria.

I came up with this like in June and I wanted to upload it for Halloween but procrastination strikes again lol here’s some Jungkook x Reader Smut 

I was hosting a small Halloween party at my house with BTS and a couple close friends.They had stopped by after an event so they were all in suits. I was dressed as a porcelain doll with icy blue contacts. Every time I spoke with Jungkook he seemed to be distracted by something. He was fidgety until he began to have some drinks. The party had gone well, everyone was gone, except for Jungkook. I was in the kitchen getting Jungkook some water when he appeared next to me. His eyes were fixed on mine, like he was under a spell. "Noona, I can't stop looking at your eyes" He said in a trance. I chuckled a bit amused at first but he soon became another person with the alcohol taking effect on him more. He had more drinks at the end of the party which had me concerned. "Jungkook, here, drink water" I pulled him to the table to sit. He smoothly took the water from my hand and placed it on the table then stood firm looking into my eyes again making me release his arm. There was no sign of the shy Jungkook I was used to anymore. He got closer to me tying  both arms around me. "Noona" He began to lean his face closer to mine. I was now the one under his spell. "Jung-" my voice was gone, something took over me. We both closed into a burning kiss. I pulled his neck down closing the gap between us. His arms pulled me closer. We back stepped feeling the sofa behind us and I lay back never pulling away from his arms. I rested my head in the arm of the sofa continuing to be drowned by Jungkooks lips. His hands were at my sides, holding himself up over me. One snaked it's way down to my leg then under my black dress lifting my thigh. I reached my hand down encouraging him on. Jungkook stopped abruptly catching his breath then looked at me. He was a bit drunk but he was fully conscious of his actions and he would never take advantage of me like this. He shook his head trying to get a hold of himself. "Noona, I'm sorry I -" I rose my hand placing my finger on his lips. "Jungkook, it's okay." I smiled then caressed his face along his jawline. With just the look in my eyes, he knew I wanted it as much as him. He breathed out trying to settle his emotions. I dug my hand behind his head into his hair pulling him back down to me. Our lips hovered centimeters away from each other as both we paused. His breathing was shaky and was growing stronger by the second, turning me on more. I breathed him in, able to taste him again and smell of alcohol still lingered. Our lips finally touched, only this time we kissed slowly, embracing our true feelings for one another. I sighed into his lips loving every second of being like this with him. He gently combed his fingers through my hair. "Saranghae Noona " he whispered. I held him tighter. "I love you too Kookie." Our tongues danced around each other in sync. I unbuttoned his shirt, pushing it back and kissed his neck. A soft moan escaped his lips as I began to suck and lick his sensitive spot. He dropped his shirt then reached for my dress which I quickly helped him remove longing to feel his skin on mine. He moved his body on mine and he began to kiss my neck while his hands explored my body. The warmth of his skin had me lost in pure bliss. It began to get hotter and hotter. I traced his firm muscles and I felt safe, everything he did was gentle. "Kookie" I breathed out "Kiss me again" He lifted his head to look at me and smiled softly then leaned down granting my wish. I grabbed his right hand holding it for a moment then placed it on my breast. He grabbed onto it then dug his thumb under my bra massaging my nipple. He reached in and unhooked my bra  tossing it aside. He moved down and sucked on my breasts one at a time. I squeezed my legs together as the throbbing in my lower area grew.  Jungkook quickly noticed. He ran his right hand up and down my leg then into my inner thigh opening my legs. I gasped loudly suddenly unable to control myself getting more excited with his every move. He smiled again thinking how cute I was even under this situation. He licked his lips as his hand sank into my panties and I felt his fingers enter me. "Fffuck" I panted feeling the satisfaction of his fingers in me. He leaned down and began to kiss me as his fingers moved around inside of me, pumping in and out. Every curse word I yelled was swallowed by Jungkook's sweet lips. He went at a steady pace at first then worked his way up.

The pleasure grew as he went faster until I felt a warm blissful feeling in me and I held onto Jungkook until it passed. My hands dropped on the bed.  He looked down at me combing my hair out of my face. "God you're so beautiful Noona" He leaned down planting a sweet kiss on my lips. I lifted my hands holding his chin in my hands kissing him back more, loving the taste of him. He began to unbutton his pants without breaking the kiss. He worked quickly and soon I felt him slowly enter me sending my head back as my moans of pleasure filled the room. Jungkook pushed in and out of me gently at first so I could adjust to his size.  He lowered his head next to mine burying his face into my neck leaving hot wet kisses. "Noona-ahh" he breathed out in pleasure. I held onto his waist pushing into him. He moved faster moaning louder slightly biting my neck sending shivers into me. I lifted one hand wrapping it around his neck. "Yes Jungkook, f-faster ahh-" His thrusts became stronger and I felt the pleasure building up higher. My entire body was in euphoria. Jungkook kissed my lips riding it out, his hips still pushing in as they began to slow down.

“Ffuck--” he sighed feeling satisfied. His body fell on mine holding onto me.

I hugged him back wiping the sweat beads from his angelic features.

He gazed at me with his big doe eyes. “You’re so fucking beautiful Noona”

He gave me a quick kiss and we lay together for a while.

He suddenly stood picking me up like a princess and walked into my room. He lay me down on my bed covering me with the blankets and joined me in the sheets. I rested my head on his chest as he stroked my hair until we both drifted off to sleep. “Goodnight my princess” 

#bts smut #jungkook #BTS jungkook #jungkookxreader #jungkook x you #jungkook smut #jeon jungkook #kookie #jeon jungkook smut #jungkook scenarios #jungkook x y/n #bts scenario #bts

[gayspock]

someone: thinks ive shut about doctor who!! me, about to go on a longass rant about world enough and time, as well as how bill’s “death” is not at all equal to clara’s “death” and im not just saying that bc im gay: :3c

first of all, i have to preface this: kind of peeved that the closest thing a companion (of the new era, before ppl suck their own titties!) has come to Death, JUST so happens to be the companion whos also uhhh... 1) the only LESBIAN companion, and 2) the only black  companion in 10 years (and also the only black one, who wasnt treated like absolute SHITE mind you!!!!!!!). obviously she isn’t DEAD-dead - and does still get a happy, fulfilled “life” with her girlfriend and im happy with that, and its sth i’ll obviously mention more  - but nonetheless the whole thing kind of reeks a widdle bit andim like H. H. H. 

however..  good GOD, despite it all world enough and time is one of my new favourites of the new who - not that i hate doctor falls, just that the former episode is so GOOD. LIKE. christ, everything concerning bill’s entire journey broke my damn heart so much (and i cried, fully, for the first time in a while) and the whole episode was so haunting and everything that happened to bill was so undeniably tragic, in what could hve been a beautiful way had it not been for the above point. like again- ffuck, it skeeves me out when i think that THAT happened to the only black lesbian, because even if she’s technically fine, but also kind of not, and i’m still like. ugudughdig but otherwise it was just so.. like the reveal at the end was obvious, but in the perfectway???

bc GOD it was just heartbreaking- like you KNOW thats her but my ass was sat there begging for it not to be, and the scenes afterwards in the doctor falls with herlooking into the mirror?? good god. NONE of it was helped by the fact bill might just literally be my FAVOURITE companion - tied maybe only with Donna (??who, perhaps, might be bumped up a little simply for nostalgias sake and tennant era points) -  and CHRIST for her, of all of them to become a cyberman??? LIKE-  this... might just me being gay, huh, but what i think i found the most Beautiful about bill in particular, was her vibrancy and her emotion - and again, not to be uhhh gay - but they said it themselves!! when she sees something she doesn’t understand, she smiles and i dddont  know HOW to say it quite well, bc im shite at that shit but god there was just such a warmth to her and just. listen. her becoming a cyberman. fuck off!! its horrible!!! im gonna bawl, bitch!!!!! im ggonna b

because also? okay. OTHER thing: cybermen in the revival have honestly been so lacking, tbh. like i will say- when i first saw them, i was terrified, and the whole sequence in rise of the cybermen/age of steel back in s2 where they just walked in and all you heard was screaming and saw the spinny blades? OKAY. that scared me- but i was six and with a (hopefully) more mature perspective i fee like... they could do so much better?? LIKE- whilst, like... OBVIOUSLY with DW there’s lines to draw, given its nature as a Family Show but  cybermen, as a concept is disturbing as shit. and im not trying to imply darker = better but i feel like.... a lot of the time, they can be reduced a little to something akin to zombies with electric arms, and their true terror is kind of REDUCED to something a lot less unique, and a lot more generic OH LOOK, HOW SCARY! THEYRE GOING TO GET US! with so much emphasis on the bravado, and the flavour that the true substance of them is.. lacking? missing? 

a lot of the same thing happened with the daleks, yet even worse- because christ, a lot of early new who is very rough around the edges, S1&S2&S4 especially but their portrayal of the daleks was brilliant, most especially  in S1′s episode Dalek. which... LISTEN. some parts of that episode aside, the fact that the most terrifying depiction of a DALEK comes from the episode where there’s, like, one of them and the emphasis is put on that only one, and how DESPITE tht the doctor is, for the first time in the revival, unabashedly horrified. and watching it as it eliminates them one by one, in a show  ruthlessness and how infallible it is is thrown into spotlight, rather than the BIG FLASHY WHISK!! situation AND obviously they had to progress past that to keep it fresh, but the reason why i think it falls iflat in later seasons is, because what WORKED about that initial episode was the dalek, at its bare essentials?? and that is, its a product of war, it’s something hellbent on killigng and only killing anything that isnt a dalek , and it wont fucking stop!!

and to stop deviating from the point: what i felt was lacking about the cybermen, was just that. their wasted potential!!! because the SCARIEST thing about them isnt the fact theyre big shooty robot men with guns, it’s what they are, and what they’re a product of. theyre PEOPLE. theyre the product of PEOPLE. they are unchecked, rampant technological advancement; they are  conformity, and erasure of identity; they are people, who don’t feel and don’t care, about anything. like bitch!! what the fuck. that’s what you should have tapped into YEARS ago!! and whilst there were always elements on that, they never truly lingered, or it wasnt shown to the true depth it was world enough??

when i first found out they were using the mondasian cybermen, despite what i just said about them overcompensating with shininess i was kind of worried on account of them being literal 50 yar old designs that consisted of cloth, and shiny fabric, aand a big metal backpac strapped to their frnt bt BY GOD. BY GFFFUCKING GOD!!!!!!! they utilised them perfectly- they  amde them absolutely terrifying which just says so MUCH. becase rather than emphasising how inhuman they were, the emphasis was the dwindling humanity and how it was being slowly, but wllingly corrupted. full faces of metal are so dead, its hard to fathom who that could have been, but stretched cloth and th way it ooks like a person is actually inside is  horrible, and the way it mimicks the hospital bandages from the mutilation... the way they look clumsy, and ugly with the fleshy-coloured hands that are distinctly people-like, but warped....

and the fact that its all willing? and an upgrade? that scene in the hospital, when the person can only repeatedly say the word PAIN PAIN PAIN over and over again and the others beg “KILL ME. KILL ME. KILL ME” and then the nurse comes in, and rather than actually helps them just turns down the volume knob, because this, in their opinion, is whats best. people are dying, and this the better alternative- the constant pain, the loss of humaniy, all of it and... BITCH. thats how you do the CYBERMEN!!! that’s how you show them WELL!!! HEYRE CREEPY AS SHIT !! THEYRE FUCKING FUCKED UP, DUDE!!!

AND OKY. OKAY GOD. OLKAY . I WENT ON A BIG LONG TANGENT ABOUT HOW MUH I LOVED THAT CYBERMAN DEPICTION BUT OKA.Y THE MORE IMPORTANT. THE OST IMPORTANTLY.

B I L L

right off the bat ppl accuse bill of doing the “love at first sight AND IVE LITERALLY... just got to ask where? when... where... what HAPPENED for ppl to accuse it of that, bc they werent in love and nobody. ever sai they were ever in love to begin with. in the episode themselves, they said it was a crush; bill just saw a pretty girl, and tried to tag along with her and hit her up bc yah!! she was cute!! and INTERESTING. and also clearly sth was up ith her, given the whole puddle thing and it isnt... THAT weird for her to come along. the whole “promise” thing was flirting-cute, lighthearted flirting- and never like... some grand love declaration. it was just lesbians, being sweet.

and then when... heather became the pilot, and followed bill around. clearly it wasnt bc she was deeply in love with her and they never even say that during the show.  it was just on the basis of the PROMISE that she made, and nothing more - and it isnt that weird, that when heather became the pilot, wires got fuckn crossed. aliens & everything misinterpret that shit, and take it p 10 pegs all the fuckn time!!  she NEVER LIKE. WAS LIKE. trying to sweep her off her feet and elope with ehr newfund beautiful wife... THAT SHIT WOULD HAVE JUST BEEN MAD SCRAMBLED, and i wouldnt be surprised that that whole Pilot thing would have some. sense of obligation instilled in it too not leave given bill was designated passenger. the whole thing was quite obviously, like... operating on the nature of the alien spaceship, and not bc the y were instantly in love and hounding one another!! what the uck!!

and so of course, like... bill also “cried” (read: was sad) when heather was gone bc no she wasnt mourning her long lost girlfriend she was moURNING. A LITERAL PERSON WHO, YES, SHE UST MET BUT WAS LIKE. LITERALLY JUST... LOST. like heather is no longer a person and maybe she isnt dead but. she isnt human any more and whilst its osmethig she sfine with its still something SAD to see happen.... ppl GET sad when they see sad things.

and maybe, personally, what i WOULD have done from hat point onwards was have heather perhaps appear in places-never interacting, and maybe never bein  seen by bill, but in little teasers similar to how bad wolf was dropped in s1, and rose appeared in s4 (however far less dramatic). that would have, like, made it feel more..... hm, im not sure of the word, but more WEIIGHTED when she did reappear to save bill int he finale??

BUT EVEN THEN, LIKE: I THINK ITS QUITE FINE THE WAY IT IS, GIVEN THE TEASE WITH BILL’S TEARS, AND THE FACT IT WAS ALREADY ESTABLISHED THAT IT COULD HAPPEN AND HEATHER’S FATE WAS LEFT OPEN ENDED IN EPI 1. SO I DONT HTINK IT CAME COMPLETELY OUT OF NOWHERE LIKE SOME PPL SUGGEST AT ALL. 

AND ALSO, it still wasnt.... LOVE. i really ont think so!!! LIKE I DONT THINK THEY LOVE EACH OTHER AT THAT POINT. like, sure- feel an attraction to one nother, sure. but thy dont say its love or anything that brought her back. what simply happened was... heathe just saved bill???????? and that doesnt have t be... LIKE PPL DONT HAVE TO SAVE OTHERS OUT OF LOVE-LOVE, JUST FUCKN. BC ITS GOOD,A ND ITS DECENT AND ALSO IF YOU CAN SAVE A CUTE GIRL, WHY WOULDNT YOU? had she not brought bill along with her, bill would have died there in that suit and would be gone and offering her this different way ofliving... WELL ITS NICE, AND ITS JUST SUCH A PLUS  THAT ITS WITH A VERY ADORABLE GIRL SHE WAS INTERESTED IN, AND CANN FALL IN TRUE AND DEEPLOV WITH AS YOU BOTH. LITERALLY TRAVEL THE GALAXY

SO NO. id ont think it was love that came out of nowhere or was fuckn shoehorned in bc i dont think there was love at all. on the other hand, danny pink andclara? YAH, i wouldcall THAT forced- way too deep feelings, for how long theyd known each other. martha, falling so hard for the doctor? YAH, THAT’SFORCED, just to fuckn. shovel the whole reboundplot on her (wrongfully so, the GREATEST injustice of fucking new who tbh).  but heather, reappearing to ssave bill from justbeing lost and dying entirely?? NNOT.... AT ALL I DONT . SEE IT. ITS JUST OT IT.

and speaking of: i also dont think its AT ALL eequivalent to claras “end” which was an absolute cop out. not this.

first of all, clara’s actual death when the raven took her was a perfect end to her. honestly, there had already been multipleoccaisions when she should have just. left long, long fucking ago but given s9s arc that was a good way for her to go and a nice way to close up and i think. an actual death was definitely deserved at tht point given howLONG its been since someone of note... actually fucking died, and died-died(like... when did that evr even happen th)  to  bring some, UHHH, CONSEQUENCE INTO THE SHOW and then.... AFTER THAT, THERE WAS LITERALLY. THE GODSEND EPISODE HAT IS HEAVEN SENT, THAT WAS A BEAUTFUL AND POIGNANT PROCESSING OF GRIEF, AND THEN-

thats... all just undone??//IN A WAY THAT, LIKE... LITERALLY MADE NO SENSE, WASTED THE WONDERFUL AND EPIC POTENTIAL A GALLIFRYEY PLOT COULD HAVE BROUGHT (gallifrey.... has literally been gone since the beginning of new who and its  role to play oculd have eventually been so fucking MOMENTOUS if theeyd done right by it but they idnt they made a mess of it but IM NOT HERE TO FUCKN SCREAM ABOUT THAT RIGHT NOW)   AND JUST ALL OF IT. HHHHH. THEY INTRODUCED... UST... STEPPING INT TIME AND BRINGING A CHARACTER OUT ?? OF THE MOMENT OF THEIR DEATH AND SHE JUST NOW SHES  JUST. ALIVE AS SHE  IS WITH LITERALLY NO CONSEQUENCE BC EVEN THE DOCTOR. FORGETTING HER WAS UNDON WHICH IS SUCH. BS HORSESHIT BC TBH. NOT TO BE RUDE BUT I DIDNT EVER WANNA SEE HER FACE AGAIN. BUT NO THEY JUST. they litrally just let her die , gave it so much meaning, and then hit undo in an OOC move and now shes  fucking. imortal and like. uh huh. UH HUH.

wheras nbill... they didnt giv us that, for once, and we literally just see her keel over for a fuckn second or something when heather appears and we dont see her dead,. like, we werent given the promise o death, to have ti snatched away if that makes anyy sense... we werent, like, told “oh shes dead” fr them to be like PSYCHE!  in the way... they literally put so much into the griefof clara but th. NEVERMIND huh but MORE IMPPORTANTLY-

herstatus of like. being  alive... is VERY DEBATABLE???

I KNOW IN A FUCKN. COMIC OR WHATEVER THERES MORE STUFF ON THAT BUT dude who taks thaat shit as canon BUT OKAY. LISTNE. LIKE.... SHES LIKE HEATHER. LITERALLY. SHES LIKE EHATHER.

theres still consequence: and though they said “does that feel dead to you” and no, she isn’t dead shes certainly not... alive. like we saw.... heather from OUR perspective in epi 1. she ust stares at ppl and cant communicate or interactwith ppl properly and isnt rlly physical. from this, i really think... that what we see of bill and heather in the final is really. a representation of their actual states more than anything and LIKE. THEM BEING CONSCIOUS, AND ABLE TO TRAEL IS WONDERFUL AND IT ISNT. DEATH NO BUT . they cant... presumably ver properly interact again and. they dont have physical forms at all and theyve become... something more akin to spirits, really, which isnt DEATH no but it isnt... ITS A DIFFERENT WAY OF LIVING, AS THEY SAID AND I DONT KNOW. I DONT THINK... ITS FANTASTIC. NOT AT ALL. I STILL CONSIDER IT A CONSEQUENCE, TBH, AND.

im ranvjasp f  I CANT finish this its 7am just. listne. LISTEN

#egg.txt #dw liveblog

[injuredfairywing]

Through whatever the fuck happens in this, I absolutely REFUSE for his projections to work and for them to make me bitter.

I’m tired of feeling hurt from this, but I’m even more exhausted at allowing myself to be affected so much. I care, but I need to stop. No more…

My heart hurts, like it literally physically hurts. I can’t keep having this my constant emotion. I can’t even ask a simple question without being snapped at. I can’t ask anything about anything that’s ever going on without being yelled at (defensively) and treated like I’m belittling and putting them down. Literally all I am doing is asking a fucking question. For example: i just asked if he knew if the mail room is open even if the office is closed. He snapped at me, yelling unstructured sentences/phrases at me and then said “I just woke up. I haven’t had a chance to go!!! Fuck!!” …. When I was literally just asking… a question. I don’t know what to do anymore. I literally want to bang my head on a ffucking wall when talking to him. He’s so quick to his emotions, being quick to anger and reactions, causing a complete uproar and inability to comprehend what the fuck is actually happening. and I can’t fucking handle this anymore. I’m genuinely cannot handle it. Either I have to take it, and just let him go off and basically say nothing, just be yelled at, or I put my foot down and I’m called a fucking bitch. PLEASE CALL ME A BITCH. If someone standing up for the emotional abuse they’re enduring makes them a bitch THEN PLEASE MAKE ME THE BIGGEST FUCKING BITCH OF THEM ALL. because I CANT. TAKE. THIS. But I’m stuck in a fucking lease and I have no way out. Im so uneasy. My head hurts.

Oh and he just tested positive for covid and I know there’s no way I won’t get it, so yayyyyyyy to this. Yay yay yay. Stuck in the house together for two weeks. How fucking magical.

Im so fucking numb to anything around him. I’m so fucking done saying literally anything. I can’t ask a question, it turns into an argument because I’m always somehow belittling him. When its like…. Why THE FUCK would i waste my fucking time dating someone I felt the goddamn fucking need to fucking belittle, ESPECIALLY how often I’m accused of it?? I can’t express how I feel because all I get in return is “okay” “if that’s how you feel” “I don’t have anything to say. Im just thinking about what you said” FUCKING SAY SOMETHING. I GET HES SCARED. Like fuckig shit he acts like it’s not scary as fuck to constantly voice your feelings KNOWING the person isn’t going to reciprocate. Its hard to voice feelings in general. Im so tired of voicing mine. Either that or I get “why do you have to bring this up everyday” dude because you treat me like this e v e r y daaaaaaay. So when I call you out I’m now a bitch and the problem to what is happening. I understand. I need to end this so fucking soon but I don’t know what to do. How to.

I’m also over the fact I can’t ever talk. Theres no connection. He wants to shut me out. He’s shutting himself out from himself. He wont talk to me. I’m getting nothing. BUT IF IM NAKED oh that’s a different story. And if I call it out, I’m a bitch.

Writing this all out. Wow. Its so hard to not call myself a stupid fucking bitch for not accepting the fact I know this type of behavior was already slightly seen before we moved in together. And now I feel trapped and suffocated. I want to go back to feeling alive but this relationship is literally draining all of my energy. All of it.

[almost-sweet-music]

Hi, I was wondering can you do some angsty jealousy smut? With 90's Damon, maybe like his female S/o flirting with Alex, if that's not to much to ask. Thank you love 💓

Thank you for the request!!

(I’ll try to fill out some shorter ones now like headcanons etc but I can’t promise much since school started… Sorry!)

Hope you’ll enjoy this one!

____

“Get into the fucking car, Y/N.” Damon growled at you, opening the door to the front passenger seat.

“I’m not going anywhere with you.” You spat back, crossing your arms on your chest. “I wanna go back inside.” Damon huffed.

“Oh no, you’re not going anywhere. I am taking you home. You’ve had enough partying for today.” You chuckled dryly.

“Yeah well, that’s not for you to decide Damon.” You growled, staring at him. He frowned and gritted his teeth. “I’m an adult and I can do whatever I want.”

“Oh yeah? And does that include flirting with Alex behind my back?” He asked. Your eyes widened. “Yeah that’s right. I saw you Y/N. Don’t think I didn’t. ”

“I never flirted with Alex, Damon… ” Damon huffed angrily and rolled his eyes.

“How dumb do you think I am Y/N?  Or blind?  I saw you. Now get into the fucking car and let’s go.” You were angry. Oh boy you were ANGRY but you decided it was best for all you just go with him and finish this somewhere else. You sat down in the car and waited for Damon to get in as well.

The ride home was silent.  No one dared to say a word or do anything for that matter. When you reached the complex you were the first one to leave the car.  You slammed the door behind you and walked inside the building,  fumbling in your purse for the keys.  You were a big tipsy but it wasn’t enough to make you do stupid stuff. You waited for the lift and by the time it arrived,  Damon caught up with you which….  Didn’t make you happy.  You were hoping you could go up by yourself making this at least a bit less awkward than it already was.  It shouldn’t be weird, after all you really did not flirt with Alex so Damon’s accusations were completely false and childish.  You got inside the small lift and pressed the button to go up.  The doors closed and it was silent again. Damon sighed and hung his head low, not saying anything. For a second you swear you felt his hand nudge yours but the moment you looked down at them,  Damon yanked it away and shoved it into his pocket. –Damon closed the door to your apartment behind himself and took off his shoes. You put down your purse and sighed, not bothering to turn on the lights inside. Suddenly you felt Damon’s hot breath on your neck and seconds later he was standing right in front of you with his lips inches away. He looked into your eyes with want. It was that kind of predatory look that made your knees grow weak.  You opened your mouth as if to say something but all they came out was a strained whimper. You closed it again and took a deep breath. 

“I didn’t do it Damon. I didn’t flirt with Alex. I didn’t flirt with anyone.” You said but he just chuckled.

“You think I care?” You frowned,  confused before the blonde roughly connected his lips with yours,  pushing you towards the nearest wall.  Once your back hit it,  Damon put one of his palms next to your head and his knee between your legs to keep them apart. He pulled away, biting your bottom lip and looking at you hungrily. “You’re mine. Do you seriously think that I care if Alex shags you or not? I know he wouldn’t because if he did he would regret the day he was born. I own you Y/N. You’re mine and mine only. ” You shivered as his fingertips moved around your body,  leaving a trail of goosebumps. Damon tugged on your earlobe with his teeth,  letting it go after a couple seconds.

“I’m not your toy, Damon. ” You said,  hissed rather before moving away from him and staring at him angrily.  “And you don’t care if Alex fucked me or not? Then why the hell did you make such a fuss about it at the party,  huh? Was your precious little ego hurt?” You snapped and you could see the anger in Damon’s eyes too.  He was getting mad again. “And you know what?  Even if I did flirt with Alex, why should you give a fuck right? After all, this is an open relationship right?” Damon looked at you questioningly. “After all, I never had any problems with all those chicks you fucked right?” You looked down at the floor,  feeling tears well up in your eyes.  “Af… After all I never… I never cared about what you are doing when you don’t come back home in the evening…  It’s not like YOU asked ME out right?!” You yelled.

“I…” Damon stuttered, not really sure what to say or how to reply to your sudden outburst of emotions.

“When you said… When you suggested being in an open relationship… I was… I was fine with it you know? It was fun to have someone to come home to, someone who you could be intimate with whenever you felt like it and still date and fuck other people… But now I know it was never like that… YOU could do that… You could shag whoever you wanted whenever you wanted but if I ever did it… I was just being a slut…Which is exactly why I never did anything like that… Ever since we got together I was faithful to you… And I cared…. A LOT. The only problem is… I don’t think you did. I don’t think you do…” You looked up at Damon again. He… He looked sad.

“Is that how you feel?” He asked,  starting down at his feet. You nodded and mumbled a ‘yeah…’ Damon sighed,  walking closer to you and stopping when he was just a step away. “I uhh…” He muttered looking up. “You’re…You’re not a slut…And I’m really sorry this made you feel the way it did. I…Love you Y/N. I should’ve treated you better than this… Please…” He moved even closer and grabbed your hands gently, “…Let me make this right. Please give me another chance…” You sighed, fighting the urge to lean closer to him and kiss him. He was so close to you, you could feel his breath hot on your cheek.

“I’m…I’m so sick of second chances, Damon.”

“I know, love I know.” He nuzzled his nose against your jawline making you gasp softly. “But please, this last time… No more open relationships, no more coming back home late. I want to show you I care Y/N. I can’t lose you…” Damon pressed a soft kiss against your jaw. You felt yourself melt underneath his touch.

See? That’s what he does to you. He can break your heart, tear you apart and with a couple words and gentle touches stitch you back together until he decides to open your wound again. But he makes the pain feel good so you can’t escape… Or don’t want to.

“I know you don’t believe me… I know you think I’m gonna hurt you again…  But I’m not.” He said breathing into your neck, sending shivers down your spine while his fingers moved against your body,  touching and groping each curve. “Please Y/N…” He suddenly moved his head away and looked at you. “One second chance.  That’s all I ask for.” You stared back at him,  thinking whether you should or not.  Your mind was screaming no… But your heart screamed yes. The truth was…  You loved Damon. You wanted to be with him.  But it was so hard…

“…One chance…  That’s all you get.” Damon smiled.

“Thank you.” He cupped your face and kissed your lips softly. You closed your eyes and shyly moved your hands up his body and placed them on his chest,  kissing him back.  Damon licked your lip,  drawing it into his mouth and sucking lightly.  You moaned quietly, taking a fistful of his shirt. “Y/N… Come with me.” He said against your lips before pulling away and taking your hand. You followed him to the bedroom you shared. He closed the door behind the two of you and quickly returned to your side.

“Damon…  I don’t think I’m… ” He put his hand on your shoulder and gently caressed it.

“I’m uh… Not great at showing emotions and I don’t know how to say it so please let me do this. I want it to be my apology in a way.” He looked at you pleadingly. “I want to actually make you feel good for once… ” Your bottom lip twitched nervously so you bit on it.

“Okay.” You whispered. 

“Okay.” Damon moved closer to you again and put his forehead against yours so your noses touched.  “I love you.” He whispered bringing his palm up to your cheek and stroking it slowly with his thumb. “So much baby girl.” You couldn’t help but smile a little and wonder… Maybe he truly is sorry?  Maybe he really will change? Damon leaned in and crashed his lips into yours again. His other hand made it’s way you your back and he slowly started to getting rid of your dress. You kissed him back hovering your hands over to the hem of his jeans but before you could do more than just popping the button open, he stopped you. “Wait,” you looked at him confused. “Not yet.”

—-

You gasped, feeling his hot breath on the inner part of your thigh, just inches away from your wet slit. He glanced up at you just to make sure you were looking. He smiled cheekily before dipping his tongue between your lips earning a strained yelp from you. Damon flicked his tongue up and down and teased at your entrance,  making you shake lightly.  You bit on your knuckles fighting the urge to buck into his face. His nose brushed against your clit making you whine and wrap your legs around his head It felt… So good…

“Mphhh… Ffuck~” You moaned. Damon glanced up at you and flattened his tongue, dragging it over the entirety of your pussy and then swirling it around the nub on the top. “Oh shiiit~ Damon I ah~” He reached up your body and grazed his nails over your chest and stomach, teasingly sucking on different parts of your cunt. You involuntarily moved your hips upwards at the sudden pain between your legs and moaned. You looked down to see Damon tugging on your clit with his teeth. He let go of it after a few more seconds and moved back down, lapping up the juices coming out of you. Your hands found their way to his hair, pulling on it lightly. Damon groaned into your wetness and shoved his tongue past your entrance, deeper inside. You gasped at the all new feeling arching your back in hopes of making him go further in. Damon let out quiet moans and growls too, groping your breasts and kneading them between his fingers. His jeans must’ve been really tight by now because you could feel him shuffling around uncomfortably.

As much as you wanted to release already you were also desperate to have more of him so you yanked Damon’s head away by his hair earnings a strained moan and a lustful look.

“Damon~ P… Please~ I need more~” He smiled lazily and got up from his knees. He quickly pulled off his shirt and unzipped his pants, pulling them down to his ankles. You stared back at the tent forming in his boxers with a hungry look in your eyes. You moved back on the bed, now laying somewhere around the middle of it. Damon crawled right after you and above you. He kneeled down between your legs and took off the briefs too. You bit your lip and spread your legs a bit further apart. He leaned down, his lips just inches away from yours.

“You sure you’re okay with this? ” you nodded.

“Yes… I need you… ” he nodded as well and aligned himself with your entrance, dipping his tip into your warm and wet pussy and took it out again. He teased you, rubbing the now wet head of his cock against your clit. You moaned and wrapped your arms round his neck, bringing him down. Finally, he decided of stop the teasing and he pushed inside of you, moaning loudly. Quickly, you wrapped your legs around his waist as well and pressed your chest against his. “Please go slow~” You whispered into his ear. He obeyed your request and started to move in and out in a slow and steady pace. You whimpered into his soft skin, dragging your nails over his back.

“Mmm, you’re so warm and wet baby…”

____

You cried out in pleasure. Damon was panting like a dog in heat as he plunged into you on the verge of cumming.

“Oh… Oh shit shit shit shit!” He yelled into your neck.

“I’m so- fuck! Just a tiny bit more!” You groaned feeling your muscles tighten and your toes curl. Damon moved his mouth to your ear.

“I’m gonna cum inside you…Fill you up till my cum drips out of your tight… Wet…. Cunt… "You whined loudly and you couldn’t hold it in anymore. You came in a scream of Damon’s name and a series of involuntary jolts. He followed right behind you, panting and cursing. After your breathing has calmed down, you let go of your lover, letting him pull out of you and collapse on the bed, completely spent. "Phew… That was so good… ” Damon sighed. You didn’t bother with cleaning up and instead curled up to his side, putting your head on his chest. “Do you believe me now? That I’m really sorry?” You shrugged.

“I’ll decide when I see a difference.” Damon chuckled and wrapped his arms around you.

“I promise you, you will.”

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