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#Coping and making the best of a bad situation
luminouslywriting · 2 days
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Angsty stressful BOB headcanon - you accidentally get pregnant during the war and try to hide it but they catch on that’s something wrong w you
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Sweetheart, I LIVE for and LOVE angsty requests, so I’m here for this! For the sake of historical accuracy and simplicity, reader is a medic/nurse that travels with Easy Company! More below the cut, cut for length, angst mentioned, pregnancy things and miscarriages mentioned:
Dick Winters:
-The thought that you might be pregnant is NOT one that crosses his mind initially. You’re distancing yourself and he doesn’t understand why. -He does his best to try and reach out and try to show you that he’s still committed—he’s honestly wondering what he did wrong. -The minute he sees the small little baby bump though?? He knows and he feels IMMENSE guilt over the entire thing. He should’ve been more careful and you definitely deserve better than being an unwed pregnant woman. -He’s now double stressed about the war and how he’s going to fix things with you and reconcile the problem. So his solution is to have a quiet elopement with you. -At least now you have some money to be taken care of. And he begs you to go and stay with his family back in the states so that you have someone taking care of you since he can’t be there. -He’s happy to have you and to be a father but it’s a very angsty and emotional time that won’t be reconciled until the war is over.
Lewis Nixon:
-Well this is a messy situation….if only because he’s well aware he’s getting a divorce but he was also having an affair with you and now you’re pregnant. -Panicked stressed upset—all of the emotions and goes through the five stages of grief tbh…and drinks to cope. -He’s got a lot of mixed emotions about the complexity of the situation. This is a second chance for happiness and also the nail in the coffin to his previous family. He also feels the weight of responsibility pretty heavily. -Also wants to marry you ASAP and cleans up his act so that he can have a chance with you and the kid. -Views it as a messy second chance so he’s very grateful despite the poor timing of everything. Dick helps him see the good in the situation. -He plans on making a very happy life with you as soon as he can.
Ronald Speirs:
-Clocks onto you being more sick than normal and more often….and just puts two and two together. He’s not an idiot, he knows he should’ve been more careful, and he feels bad. -This is a war and it’s not exactly great timing. He doesn’t want to make you commit to anything if you’re not absolutely certain of being with him. -Conversations are had about whether or not you’ll keep the kid and what you’ll do if you decide to keep it. Co-parenting seems to be the safest bet for now. -Don’t get me wrong, he wants a life with you. He just doesn’t want you to feel like he’s trapped you in said life with him. -He’s probably the most logical about things in the sense that he’s making sure you get a transfer back to London and away from the front lines for safety and health purposes. -Also dutifully writes you until the war is over and he can meet the kid and marry you.
Buck Compton:
-Despite the seriousness of the situation, it just depends on if it was before or after Bastogne. Either way, I think he’s a very big nervous wreck about things. -He wants to be a dad, wants to be a husband and have a life with you….but not like this. -Whatever his plan is that he’s figuring out, it gets thrown off by Bastogne and everything that happens there. -I truthfully think that the best thing might be for you to follow him home since you’re pregnant and try to help in his recovery. You can be a big help emotionally to him. -Buck feels a lot of guilt for feeling broken and not able to support or help you as a parent or lover, but the minute that kid is born, he’s getting everything back on track. -After a while, he’ll ask you to marry him and share a life with him.
Carwood Lipton:
-This responsible mother hen?? Feels like the W O R S T person ever. Not his intention to put you in this situation and wants to send you home with a ring on your finger post-haste. -So that’s exactly what he does, he finds the nearest chaplain and gets hitched and then writes his mother
-He has so much guilt over not being there for the birth of the baby and not being there for you
-But it’s the hope of seeing you and the baby that keeps him going and keeps him hopeful, even during times like Bastogne. -Probably quietly talks about the situation with a few pals of his, including Speirs. And he definitely misses you a lot. -And consistently apologizes the rest of your marriage over the entire thing.
Joseph Liebgott:
-Doesn’t know whether or not to hope for the best or the worst because the timing of it all is just super poor and inconvenient?? -Feels guilty over that and while he’s happy that this means he gets to have you in his life, he’s also acutely aware of how complicated he’s made things for you. -It’s an anchor point for him to remember what he’s fighting for and that humanity is a thing though, so there’s that sobering point he gets to. -Probably wants to get married but there’s not a chaplain around so his next bet is to go to Winters and try to get you transferred somewhere else. -Promises he’s going to make it back to you and get married after the war. He thinks of little else during Bastogne and the hard times. -When he goes to Austria, you show up with the baby and he finally gets to meet baby Liebgott and get hitched haha.
Donald Malarkey:
-Excited and sad at the same time?? Doesn’t really know how to feel and is now worried about leaving you on your own with a baby. -Is also really worried he’ll never get to meet the baby and so he tries to make the most of the short times that you do have together. -Insists on getting married so that if he dies, you have some fallback money and something that will take care of you and the baby. -Probably cries about it when he’s alone because it was NOT the plan and he doesn’t think that you should have to put up with any of this stuff anyway. -Tries to find baby stuff in different towns that he can give to you when he gets back to you. -Wrote home to his mother immediately that she was going to be a grandmother lol.
Eugene Roe: (Big sad, I’m sorry):
-Was not intending on getting you pregnant but now that you are, he’s super excited and happy about it….and also terrified because pregnancy has so many complications anyway. -Prays avidly for your safety and for the baby’s safety as you two are figuring things out. Truth be told, it’s probably right around Bastogne that you both figure out that you ARE pregnant. -The guilt is real and he’s coming into the city as much as possible to try and see you and check on you. It’s cold, rations are low, and you’re working a lot anyway. -Now here’s where you’re all going to demand I pay for therapy (get in line kids). You survive the church collapsing but you lose the baby a few weeks later after some severe cramping and being sick. -And the thing is?? He’s horribly awfully and guiltily relieved because it’s probably safer for you this way and there was no way that either of you could have been parents right now. -But he does promise to marry you and that you’ll have more children one day.
Bill Guarnere:
-Finds out about it by accident when you’re telling another nurse and freaking out bc you don’t know what to do. And this man?? Baffled and shocked and trying to figure out what to say. -So he comes to you and quietly lets you know that he knows and is willing to do whatever you need/want for things. -You two get married right before D-Day and then he ships out. You two write letters back and forth faithfully for months. -Everyone knows you’re having a baby and that is the baby of Easy Company lol. -His accident in Bastogne happens and he gets shipped back to London and then back to the states and you go with him. -He’s in recovery when the baby is born and he’s happy about it because it’s really a new life for everyone tbh.
Joe Toye:
-You try to break up with him and the argument gets pretty nasty bc there’s no real reason for the breakup until you drop the bomb that you’re pregnant and he just??? Short circuits?? -He gets really soft and sweet about the entire thing and promises that he’s going to stay by your side through it. -So he writes his family ASAP and marries you in a church in his uniform. Then you’re getting sent back to your family and his and it’s a bit messy. -But he’s writing you and really excited to meet the kid….who is faithfully and dutifully born a few weeks before his accident in Bastogne. -He doesn’t even know the kid had been born until he gets back and there’s a lot of guilt and grief and feelings of inadequacy about the situation. -But he’s a great dad and a great husband so it all works out.
George Luz:
-is honestly trying to come up with every possibly outcome and solution so that he’s prepared for whatever decision you make. -You told him about it shortly after they returned from D-Day and he’s a little shocked (more than a little) and having a hard time keeping a lid on things. -He wanted a whole wedding that everyone could celebrate and be happy with, but going down to a courthouse with you and a few of the guys will do. -Gives the men of Easy Company updates on the pregnancy via letters from you all of the time. And you get the weirdest most random questions from them, I’m sure. -Narrowly survived Bastogne and was really struggling until your letters started coming through again. -Is really excited to meet the baby and see you again once things are over with the war.
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meateater-lamb · 5 months
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(dont read the tags actually)
#vent#god this year has been so fucking hard man#and things have been so strained with my friend#and i love them so much. theyre my best friend. but at this point are they?#cause they just keep getting pissed at me over everything#and acting really weird#and theyve just. turned into this unendingly angry and negative person to the point i feel like i can barely talk to them anymore#they are so short tempered which i mean they always have been but just not with ME yknow#like they for ten years were always so kind to me and weve always gotten along well#until the last like year#and i know theyre in a bad place but jesus theyve made it so hard to even hold a conversation anymore#and i mean i think things will get better if they can get out of their current situation. i really think we can go back to normal but just.#not til then. cause they seem like the only coping mechanism they use is pure fucking anger#and now theyve started directing it at me and im just. getting tired.#i cant tell if they are purposely pushing me away or not. but thats whats happening either way.#and its awful bc i just feel like its all my fault. like im not good enough#im not helpful enough im too annoying im just. not good enough care about anymore#they make me feel like none of my problems are important anymore and like i shouldnt even mention it if im struggling#meanwhile all they do is vent and rant and im really really tired but i dont think i can say anything#im trying to open myself up to being social with people other than them again.#they used to be my best safe space but now they arent anymore#but im still going to be there for them the best i can cause they dont deserve to be abandoned when theyre struggling#but i just hope they can get in a better place and idk. realize theyre kinda being a dick all the time#ugh idk#dont read this shit i just need to get my thoughts straight idk.#i was scrollin when i started thinkin abt this thats the only reason im writin on here abt it#probably gonna delete it in an hour anyway#moon
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eldritch-nightmare · 4 months
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some updates uhm. i finished up cody's valentine's day prompt!! i haven't started on bo's or carmina's but hopefully i cant get started on one of them tomorrow if the universe will permit it.
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l33n1s · 29 days
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Give me Shen Twins with a complicated relationship.
I wanna see Shen Twins that viscerally cannot stand the way that the other copes with the bad things that've happened to them.
Give me SY who pleads with SJ to "just behave" while cleaning his wounds because he's scared his brother is going to get into bigger trouble than they can handle. Because he can't understand SJ's refusal to make himself smaller, can't understand why his brother feels the need to fight the world even at the expense of his own wellbeing.
Give me SJ yelling and shaking SY because he can't stand the way the SY just seems to accept their situation. Because where SY's response to fear and uncertainty is to avoid and hide, SJ's is to fight.
I wanna see SJ resent that he's the Only person that SY will actually fight and I wanna see SY being hurt that his brother just won't listen to him when he's Just trying to help.
And then give be post-Qui Shen Twins who learn to understand. Let SJ learn that SY's anger was only safe with him. Let SY understand SJ's violent need to be seen as a real person. Let them both understand that they Both did their best to keep each other alive.
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pizzapizzadickz · 1 year
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I feel a lil bit better today after getting some rest in. I always feel better when I can spend a day at home. I think tomorrow I'll wear my noise cancelling headphones or something so I can chill even more.
...funny how my way to chill is just trying to eliminate all external stimuli
(Pt 1 for description rant)
#diary#personal#i rly wanna book a therapy appointment but im having a rly hard time trying to get myself to do that bc i need to check i can vid call#cuz my computer monitor is broke and havent fixed it yetttt ugh.#i rly feel like researching autism again. idk. i saw a video about communication badges being used at furry conventions#and by god that sounds so fun ;-; like. i really struggle with interaction with others and talking is sometimes really hard.#mainly bc if theres a lot of noise i usually wanna block it out and if i gotta take my earbuds out to comunicate all the time its not fun#idk. i just wish i could go around writting shit out for ppl to read and thats that. no need to speak to clerks or crap.#bc imma be honest. i have a hard time hearing too. like in crowded places. its so overwhelming all the time.#its both a good and a bad thing that im giving myself the permission to be overwhelmed in situations#but its also making it much more difficult to actually be in those situations.#idk. i used to force myself through it. tell myself i like it or whatever. but by god everything just hurts nowadays#like. i dont like leaving my house mostly bc of the sensory overload.#i wonder how things'll change in the future. just how much more accepting will i and society be. i dont know.#but i hope i learn to cope more. bc life is really hard and imma be honest im struggling at best.#idk. i find it so hard to work lately. i love my thoughts. they are so fluid. and just. language doesnt keep up.#everything i say or write isnt quite right. and it bothers me. i sorta wished telepathy existed just soley so i could comunicate#idk maybe someday ill learn sign language. and maybe that could help. but it wouldnt help when im shut down. or having a meltdown#yknow. i find face to face human to human contacr really scary. i worry theyll want to do something and i wont#i worry i wont be able to get across my reasoning as to why. i worry that theyll see just how odd my behaviour can be.#and above all i just sorta worry they wont work with me to meet me halfway. like. im stuck with my family i dont want that with friends too#i hope if i visit them itll be okay. that like. i wont cause a problem or accidentally offend them or something?#idk. i wanna make friends n hang out. but as ive gotten older ive discovered just how much i hate that.#like i saw a rly cool tik tok about how they set up their home for all their autistic friends when they come over.#like. its established you can just stop talking and remove urself if you wanna. and theres stim toys n plushies n shit. and low lighting#and just. that sounds like heaven. i struggle so much in social situations. bc i eventually get tired.#and it makes me feel sorta burnt out/depressed. so itd be nice if i could just remove myself from a stituation whenever.#or just lay my head down on someones lap and silently observe.#i wish i knew what to do when i get overwhelmed in public. bc it happens a lot. and i freeze. and idk what to do.#and ill cry and get overwhelmed and shutdown or meltdown. and i start to aimlessly wander and its sorta dangerous tbh?
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girlgenius1111 · 1 month
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might just love you 'til the end
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post... that match. a bit of angst, mostly fluff. alexia is not pleased after her performance against chelsea. you aren't quite sure what she needs from you. you decide to give her space, but that isn't really what she needs. alexia tells you... eventually.
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It was a long day, a tiring and difficult match, and Alexia probably would have resorted to one of her coping mechanisms, if she hadn’t missed that last shot on goal. It seemed to take something out of her, and even from your place sitting on the bench, you could see how angry she was acting. Underneath that, though, you could tell that she was really just disappointed in herself. 
Watching her blink back tears as she made her way around the pitch was almost too much for you. You wanted nothing more than to grab her hand, pull her into the tunnel, and hug her until she wasn’t sad anymore. You knew better than to try to comfort her now, though. Alexia hated nothing more than seeming weak, especially in front of the team. Anything she needed or wanted from you would have to wait until you both got home. And even then, you weren’t sure what to expect. Sometimes she’d just shut down after a bad game, go to sleep, and wake up with a new passion the next morning. Sometimes she’d shut down, but her fury at herself would linger for days. Very rarely did she talk about it. Only when she really reached her breaking point, which was admittedly a lot harder to reach than other people’s were, would she let you make her feel better.  
It wasn’t necessarily a healthy array of options that she normally went with, but you couldn’t argue that it didn’t work. It worked for Alexia, and that was what was important. Even if giving her space until she asked for something else hurt, you knew it was what she needed. 
She acted pretty much how you expected her to as you both made your way into the locker room and headed for the showers. The blonde gave you nothing more than a high five and a weak smile, before she launched herself into her post match routine. You did the same, icing various parts of your body that hurt after a rather physical game. You kept your eyes on your girlfriend, though, watching the hollow way she brushed through her hair and the mechanical way she laced up her shoes. You were done before her, sitting in your locker looking at your phone, trying to figure out how bad the social media situation was going to be for her, when her white nikes appeared in front of you. You looked up at her with a smile, though it fell slightly when you took in the completely emotionless look on her face. She’d shut down, then, like you’d expected her to. You knew it was coming, but it didn’t make it easier that she wouldn’t let you help.
“¿Lista?” She asked roughly, not meeting your eyes. 
“Yeah, let’s go.” You replied, getting to your feet, grabbing your bag, and giving Mapi a reassuring look from where she sat waiting for Ingrid to be ready to go. You knew your girlfriend’s best friend worried about her, and that she had tried to talk to her after the match, but it hadn’t really gone anywhere. You were surprised when, as soon as you were out of the locker room and had walked a ways down the hall, Alexia dropped her bag to the ground and pulled you into a tight hug. 
You returned the hug, sighing into her shoulder, feeling her bury her face in your slightly damp hair. The hug was for you, you could tell. To make you feel better, even when Alexia wouldn’t allow you to do anything to make her feel better. She held herself a bit tensely, and when she pulled away, her eyes searched yours, her worry clear on her face. 
“Te amo,” she whispered, pressing a light kiss to your cheek. “I am proud of you, always.” 
“I love you, Ale,” you replied, a thousand more words on the tip of your tongue. You wanted to tell her you were proud of her, too, that it wasn’t her fault, that she didn’t need to deal with today all by herself, but you knew she wouldn’t accept it right now. Instead, you grabbed her hand in yours and squeezed tightly. 
The captain kept her hand in yours as you both walked to her car, and though you expected her to pull away from the contact, you were glad that she was letting herself have something to make herself feel better. The car ride home was silent, and you predicted the rest of the night to be the same.
------
You knew to let Alexia deal with it how she dealt with it, but you did put your foot down on a couple things. When she headed right for the couch, going to put the match replay on the TV and take notes, you shook your head, taking the remote out of her hand. 
“Not tonight. It won’t make you feel better.” 
“I have to watch,” she argued, but you cut her off. 
“You can watch tomorrow. Tonight we are going to watch a movie, order dinner, and go to bed early.” 
“Amor,” Alexia sighed, her brow furrowed, no doubt thinking about how she could convince you to let her do this. 
You switched tactics, knowing there was one sure way to get your girlfriend to agree with you. “Please? For me? I don’t want to watch that again right now.” 
The blonde softened, nodding her head at you. Satisfied, you flopped down on the couch next to her, grabbing her arm and draping it over your shoulder. 
Alexia smiled despite herself, leaving a soft kiss on the top of your head. She was still practically silent as you picked out a movie, but she pulled you close to her, slipping her hand up the front of your shirt and  running her thumb back and forth across your skin. 
Even if she was only letting this happen because she thought she was comforting you, it was still better than nothing. Better than the rare occasions that she’d sleep on the couch, almost as a punishment for herself when she didn’t perform the way she thought she should’ve. The blonde had gotten better since getting together with you, mostly because you pointed out the inconsistencies in how she treated you after a rough game, and how she treated herself. Some rough days sent her spiraling back to her bad habits, though, and you were glad you could pull her away from those, at least for today.
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“Cariño,” Alexia whispered, jostling you slightly. “Let’s go to bed, vale?” 
“Hmm?” You mumbled, barely opening your eyes. “‘M not asleep.” 
“Oh, sure. You are just watching the movie with your eyes closed?” 
“Sí,” you sighed, turning against her slightly until your head was laid on her chest. It vibrated under you as she laughed, and the sound woke you a bit more, glad to hear something even remotely joyful come out of your girlfriend’s mouth. 
“Venga, amor, it is time for bed.” She insisted, gently sitting up and easing you into an upright position. You pouted at her, wishing the smile on her face would reach her eyes. When it didn’t, you rose from the couch, grabbing Alexia’s hand, and pulling her towards the bedroom. 
You both made quick work of your nighttime routines, and you were glad to slide into the bed, undeniably exhausted from the physically and emotionally draining day. Alexia slipped in next to you, though she didn’t really get comfortable; she remained halfway sat up, staring at the ceiling above her. You tucked yourself into her side, burrowing under the covers until you were surrounded by soft fabric and Alexia’s sweatshirt. She seemed wide awake, and you laced your fingers with her, rubbing your thumb comfortingly along the back. 
“Sleep, baby. You need rest. Everything will feel better in the morning.” Alexia nodded mechanically, giving you a half smile that you didn’t buy for a second, before her eyes fluttered shut. “I love you. You’re my favorite person.” You whispered. 
She opened her eyes again at your words, softening slightly. She turned on her side and pulled you into her chest, wrapping you up tightly in her arms. “Te amo, mi niña, eres perfecta.” She whispered. 
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You fell asleep easily. Alexia, evidently, had not. You realized this when you rolled over in the middle of the night, seeking out your girlfriend to curl up against, and only felt cold sheets next to you. 
It woke you up, and you opened your eyes, in your sleepy haze worried Alexia had gotten sick or something. You looked around the room, and towards the bathroom, but no lights were on. You sat up in the bed, forcing yourself to wake up more. Once you had thought about it for a minute, you had a sneaking suspicion about where your girlfriend had disappeared to in the middle of the night. You grabbed your phone from the nightstand, checking Alexia’s location, and sure enough, her little profile picture was at a park a few blocks away. It had a football pitch, and Alexia sometimes slipped away there when she wanted to clear her head, but not deal with seeing people she knew at the Barça training ground. 
You dragged yourself out of bed, even though you had half a mind to call Ale’s mom and get Eli to deal with her, knowing she could scold her daughter much more effectively than you could. It was the middle of the night, though, and you knew that Alexia may need a softer approach. You weren’t really sure what headspace she’d be in when you found her, and it was at this thought that you began to move faster, pulling on joggers and a shirt, and rushing down the stairs. You could visualize what she’d be doing, taking shot after shot on goal, but you couldn’t figure out how she’d be acting. Upset, or sad, or angry, or still completely blank. You grabbed your car keys, not really wanting to waste a second longer than possible by walking to where Alexia was, although it wasn’t far. 
It only took a few minutes to arrive, and you pulled into the parking lot with your attention completely fixed on the figure across the park, running down the pitch with a ball at her feet. As you got closer, you took in how exhausted Alexia looked, as if she’d been at this for hours.
“Ale?” You called, finally arriving at the pitch and trying to get your girlfriend’s attention from the sidelines. She didn’t look over at you, too caught up in her own thoughts, trying to angle her shot in just right. 
You moved closer, and finally she saw you, just out of the corner of her eye. She stopped what she was doing, turning to face you. “Amor?” She questioned. “What are you doing here?” 
You resisted the urge to roll your eyes at her question. “Really? You’re asking me what I’m doing here?” Your girlfriend had the decency to look slightly embarrassed. “It’s the middle of the night, Alexia. What are you doing?”
“I could not fall asleep.” Alexia told you, walking over to you, her ball abandoned behind her. 
“Why didn’t you wake me?” You asked, brushing a few pieces of flyaway hair off her forehead. She melted into your touch, her body slouching down towards you, giving you even more of an idea of how exhausted she was. 
“I wanted you to rest.” She said quietly, and it was a perfectly believable explanation, but for some reason you had a feeling that there was more to it than that. You fixed her with a look, raising one eyebrow. The blonde sighed again, grabbing your hand in hers. “Can we go home?” 
“Only if you promise to talk to me when we get there. Otherwise I’ll make you stand in goal while I shoot.” You teased, happy to see a small smile on your girlfriend’s completely drained face. 
“Promise.” She said, giving your hand a squeeze as you both began to walk towards the park exit. 
-------
You sent Alexia to shower upon arriving home, sitting on the couch until she was done, absolutely sure that if you got back in bed, you’d instantly fall back asleep. Alexia very timidly walked out of the bathroom 20 minutes later, all bundled up in a sweatshirt and sweatpants even though it was rather warm out. 
Alexia looked weirdly nervous as she sat down next to you, her eyes everywhere but on yours. She reached for your hand very hesitantly, relaxing slightly when you intertwined your fingers with hers easily. 
“What’s wrong, Ale?” You asked. 
“I am sorry about today. Really sorry, amor.” 
You opened your mouth, prepared to tell her that you forgave her for sneaking away in the middle of the night instead of waking you up, but you stopped when you looked at her closer, and found tears in her eyes. Something about the way she’d phrased it, too, that she was sorry about ‘today,’ didn’t sit right with you. 
“What are you sorry about?” You asked, frowning when Alexia chewed on her lower lip instead of answering. 
“I disappointed you today.” She said finally. 
“Alexia,” you rushed to contradict her, but she cut you off. 
“No, I know I did. I am sorry, I will do better, mi amor, I promise.” 
“Love, you did not disappoint me.” You insisted, cradling your girlfriend’s cheek and wiping away a stray tear. She shrugged, like she didn’t believe you. “You could never disappoint me, Alexia, especially not by missing a shot. Why do you think that?” 
Her eyes flicked up to yours, finding only sincerity there, as she took a deep breath, and spoke. “I told you I was proud of you.” Alexia mumbled, her cheeks flushing. “You did not say it back. And you normally give me a hug after matches in the locker room, but you did not, not until I hugged you.” 
You were sure you felt your heart crack in two. “Baby, I’m so sorry.” You said, reaching to pull her into a hug. She shrugged out of your grasp, though, and you were furious with yourself in that moment. 
“You do not need to be sorry, I understand.” She said, albeit rather miserably, looking so angry and upset with herself, when she really should have been directing that at you. 
“No, Alexia, look at me.” You insisted, gently tilting her head to look at you. She was barely holding back tears, her lip wavering sadly. “Oh, my love. I didn’t say it back because I didn’t think you’d want to hear it. You never listen after rough games, I was trying to let you have your feelings for the night, and then try to make you feel better tomorrow. I didn’t think you’d want comfort, Alexia, not today. I am so proud of you, Alexia. Every day, I am proud of you, especially today. You did everything you could do, I know that. It just wasn’t our day. Estoy tan orgullosa de ti.” You emphasized. 
Alexia nodded slowly, but you could tell she didn’t fully believe you. 
“Would you ever be disappointed with me for missing a shot?” You asked, slightly amused when the blonde whipped her head up to look at you, a frown set on her features. 
“No. Never.” Alexia said quickly, appalled at even the idea.
You smiled at her sadly. “Can you not imagine that I feel the same way about you, Ale? That I love you just as much as you love me? 
Your girlfriend swallowed roughly, reaching to pull you into her lap, and into a hug. You let her manhandle you the way she wanted, wrapping your arms around her and kissing the side of her head repeatedly once she grabbed on to you. 
“It is hard to believe sometimes. It is… too good to be true. That you love me like I love you. I do not always feel like I deserve it. Especially when I am grumpy all day after we lose, and I sneak out of our bed, and make you come find me in the middle of the night.” Alexia said, her voice dripping with insecurity. 
You pulled back just slightly, pressing your forehead to Alexia’s, threading your fingers through her hair. “You always deserve it. Always, Alexia. And I would get out of bed in the middle of the night to come find you every day if you needed me too. I’d get on a plane in the middle of the night and fly halfway across the world to find you, if that’s what you needed.” You whispered, leaning forward to press your lips to Alexia’s. 
She kissed you back, hard, trying to tell you how much everything you’d said meant to her. 
“I’d rather not, but I’d do it.” You mumbled against her mouth, feeling her smile against your own lips. 
“Okay.” She said finally, and it was clear to you that she believed you a bit more now, and that she’d believe you even more tomorrow. “I will keep my fleeing of the country to a minimum.” 
You laughed. “Good. Because I want to go to bed.” 
Alexia nodded enthusiastically, rising up off the couch with you held securely in her arms. “Me too.” 
She carried you towards the bedroom, already physically more relaxed than she’d been all day. 
“If you set an alarm for the morning, I will make you sleep at the park tomorrow night.” You told her, letting out a rather undignified squeak when she gently threw you down on the bed. 
She smiled at you mischievously, her bad day completely forgotten. How could she think about her performance when you were so perfect, and so pretty, and she was so tired.
“No alarm.” She promised, turning her light off and collapsing onto the bed next to you. It had been a mistake, not waking you up before. Because when you pulled her into you and began to scratch lightly at her back, she went completely limp, and she knew you were all she needed to fall asleep. Alexia didn’t need to practice her shots until her legs were numb. She just needed to lay her head on your chest and hear your heartbeat in her ear, and she’d remember that everything would be okay. 
------
hope you enjoyed :)
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kaiijo · 20 days
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ok. bllk and jealousy rate. how jealous can they get over their gf and what do they do to cope lmao
HOW JEALOUS IS HE? — [BLUE LOCK]
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characters: isagi yoichi, bachira meguru, itoshi rin, itoshi sae, kunigami rensuke, nagi seishiro, mikage reo, oliver aiku content: gn! reader (request says gf but reader is gender neutral) notes: some of these are lowkey toxic, minor spoilers for kunigami’s character arc, nagi is taller than reader
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most jealous: bachira, rin, reo 
bachira meguru ✶
bachira has many, many insecurities. growing up isolated and without many friends, he is more possessive of those he’s close to, which obviously includes you. he just doesn’t want to lose you, which manifests itself in jealousy over anyone he perceives as a threat to your relationship
bachira gets really clingy when he’s jealous. he thinks that inserting himself into the situation, sometimes literally wedging himself between you and the other person. he usually chooses to drape himself over you, nuzzling into your neck and speaking low enough that only you hear, trying his best to divert your attention. third-wheeling is pretty uncomfortable for the other person, especially with the smiling sneer bachira’s shooting at them, so they make a quick irish exit 
itoshi rin ✶
an egoist to his very core, rin can get very jealous. while he’s very sure of himself in nearly every other part of his life, he knows that he is not an ideal partner a lot of the time, though he’ll never admit it. he’s not the most expressive or the most patient, and he’s sure that there are better partners for you out there. 
when rin’s jealous, it’s a silent but deadly thing. like when he’s locked in on the ball in a game, his focus you and his ‘competitor’ is unwavering. he stalks over to stand behind you, his chest bumping right up against your back, and he snarls, “what the hell do you want, you mediocrity?” usually the other person backs off after seeing rin’s bone-chilling glare but if they’re bold enough to answer back, rin bares his teeth and is poised to strike. it’s probably best if you diffuse the situation quickly before it gets uglier  
mikage reo ✶
we already know how jealous reo was over nagi so it’s safe to say that he’s definitely very jealous. having been bored with the world and other people for so long, he’s thrilled when you two get together. it makes his very protective of you and he wants to be one of the most, if not the most, special person in your life. 
reo can go a couple of ways when he feels jealous over someone else but it think his primary response is to tear down the person methodically. he tilts his head a little, looks the person up and down, and notes everything about their appearance — hair, skin, clothes (including brand and cost) and criticizes every little thing. it’s a strategic move in his opinion, using observational skills and knowledge he had given his upbringing to pick apart the other person. he also might make some underhanded comment that includes that he has a black card 
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less jealous: isagi, kunigami, sae 
isagi yoichi ✶
he definitely gets jealous from time to time but he doesn’t feel the need to act on it a lot. he’s pretty mature and for the most part level-headed (plus his ability to piece together future events helps him keep his cool a lot). this doesn’t mean that he isn’t jealous 
when isagi is jealous, he’s sulky. he won’t take immediate action and watch from afar, arms crossed and a little pouty. he tries to look as dejected and as ‘wet-cat pathetic’ as possible to make you feel bad and come over to comfort him. when you inevitably do, looping your arm through his and kissing his cheek, he can’t help but smirk at the other person like a cat who go the cream 
kunigami rensuke ✶
i debated where to put kunigami since there are ‘two sides’ to him — pre- and post-wildcard. pre-wild card kunigami is definitely a lot less bothered; he trusts you 100% and is 100% confident and secure in your relationship and himself. post-wild card kunigami is less chill and more forceful. he’s not a hero anymore but even as he plays a more ‘villainous’ role in soccer, he won’t cross that line in your relationship. he’s still very secure in you and himself, but he’s more protective of your relationship. definitely a ‘i trust you/us but it’s other people i’m worried about’ kind of guy
when pre-wild card kunigami got jealous, he won’t act in the moment and will talk to you about it afterwards, in a private setting. open lines of communication were important to him and working out problems like this. post-wildcard kunigami is all stormy looks and intimidation. like rin, he also stands behind you but in less actively aggressive way and more just to be threatening. it’s 95% effective and the 5% of times it doesn’t work, kunigami is not above muscling the other person away 
itoshi sae ✶
i thought about putting sae in the ‘most jealous’ section but i just think that he is someone whose jealousy simmer just beneath his apathetic surface. he sees most other people as beneath him and believes that they are not worthy of speaking to you, let alone hitting on you, but because he’s sees them as so beneath him, he can’t be bothered half the time to do anything since they’re simply not worth it. he gets the most jealous when it’s people who he can potentially view as equals, like other professional athletes 
when he’s jealous, sae literally just pretends they don’t exist, only talking to you. if the other person tries to interject, he sends them a sideways glare — the only acknowledgment of their existence — and then turns away to continue whatever conversation, suggesting that you both get away from the other person as quickly as possible. if ignoring the person doesn’t work, sae doesn’t shy away from spewing vitriol at the other person
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least jealous: nagi, oliver, michael
nagi seishiro ✶
simply put, being jealous is a hassle to nagi. it makes him too hot and too annoyed for him to want to feel it so he suppresses the feeling a lot. nagi’s height is already intimidating enough for most people so they don’t approach you when they see you two together but that isn’t a deterrent to everyone
when nagi gets jealous, he does one of two things: just gives a thousand-yard stare that freaks people out or he gets whiny and clingy. his stare is eerie and silent, and the lightness of his eyes doesn’t help it. he towers over you like some cryptid companion. when he gets whiny and clingy, nagi tugs at your sleeve and asks drily, “can we go yet? why are you still talking to them?”
oliver aiku ✶
sigh… oliver is undoubtedly someone who thinks and knows he’s the shit. with so many women and men alike fawning over everything about him, his ego is through the roof. he has very little worry about you leaving him for someone else. honestly, he finds it amusing most of the time when someone attempt to draw you away from him, and let’s it play out a lot for his own entertainment. of course, he’ll intervene if it’s making you uncomfortable but he also believes you can handle yourself 
when oliver gets jealous, he acts as casual as possible. he’s friendly towards the other person and but it’s not hard to uncover that it’s all fake, whether it’s from the glint in his eye or the way his smile is stiff and forced. common tells when he gets jealous is that he pokes his tongue against the inside of his cheek or he clenches his teeth and inhales softly but sharply.  he employs the good old tactic of calling the other person the wrong name and making all kind of underhanded comments that slowly chip at their nerves. (“haruya? haruki? oh! you’re haruto! right, right, you know, they’ve never mentioned you before! crazy, huh?”) 
michael kaiser ✶
kaiser in german literally means ‘emperor,’ and it’s no secret that kaiser views himself as one. similar to sae, he see himself as so above others that he’s not even bothered by other people hitting on you. it displeases him greatly, sure, but these cockroaches will never be able to steal you from him so why should an emperor deal with the plebians? the only time that ever happens is when a peasant is particularly forceful and then, kaiser intervenes
when he gets jealous, kaiser puts on a show. if there’s one thing about him, he’s a bit of a drama queen. he will absolutely posture and puff out his chest at the offending person, looking down his nose arrogantly and smirking. he makes a big display of wrapping himself around you, gripping firmly at your hips and saying, “liebling, you’re very charitable to entertain this insect, but it’s time to end this ruse.”
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blondwhowrites · 3 months
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✨My Mattheo Riddle Headcanons✨
Absolutely a playboy and has a high body count manwhore
Despite that, he would never cheat because my boy is EXTREMELY loyal. Once he's locked in he's locked in for life especially since he knows he loves you
You're the one for him
Princess treatment to the max 💅
Would beat up anyone that tries to flirt with you or looks at you badly
He makes sure the boys treat you with absolute respect and though he would never admit it he would love seeing you grow close to his friends
Wouldn't give up smoking for you early in the relationship but after a year or two if you asked him to try quitting he would
Likes to show you off because GODDAMN ARE YOU HOT
He doesn't know how he managed to bag you 😩🙏
Leaves hickeys on your thighs and neck and pouts whenever you try to hide them in public
Doberman energy to the max
He is your guard dog and will follow you around glaring at everyone especially if he knows you're not in the mood to talk to people
Usually is the big spoon but after his father comes back he would want you to hold him since you're one of the few people he truly feels safe with (Draco and Theo are on that list of people he feels safe with along with Narcissa since I headcanon he grew up with the Malfoys)
Has a notebook that he draws in and half of it is just filled with pictures of you that he drew yes some of them are of you nude
Can be aggressive but never with you, and he really only gets aggressive when he's frustrated or mad
He's subtle in his softness towards you in public. He isn't an easy person to read and can come off cold to other people, but he's less rigid when he is with you.
Motherfucker looks at you as if you created this world. To him, you're a goddess
Would be uncomfortable with physical touch at first (he's not used to touch that isn't either platonic or sexual)
Once he does get used to it he will actively seek it out though he wouldn't outright ask for it more like tap your hand when he wants to hold it, or place his hand on your thigh just so he can feel you
Early in the relationship, the arguments would be bad because he doesn't really know how to channel his anger into something healthy
He ends up going to Draco and Theo asking for advice and they just immediately send him to Blaise
He ends up drawing to help cope whenever he is angry and he also grows close to Blaise who had been the one to give him the advice
After that, the arguments get increasingly better along with communication too
Steals your food that little shit
Loves when you wear his clothes
Would absolutely wear anything that you gift him
He doesn't cry a lot and he prefers to be alone when he does cry but he'll let you comfort him even if it is just sitting with him and holding his hand as he lets out his emotions
He enjoys partying but he's not a party animal like others. He just stays with you and the others, drinking and making sure nobody tries anything with you
Is extremely protective of you, especially around anyone that he doesn't know or trust
Despite what everyone thinks he doesn't hate Harry Potter, I mean he doesn't like him, but it's not a mortal enemy type situation
Kinda just stays away from him and his little quartet
Does has some prejudice against muggle-borns because that's just how he was raised but after the war his views would drastically change
Is a dom and that's all I'm gonna say on that 😏
Overall not the worst boyfriend but not the best either. Your relationship with him has its ups and downs, but he truly does love you and tries his best to be good for you.
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supernovafics · 5 months
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𝐖𝐄'𝐑𝐄 𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐒 𝐀𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐘
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pairing: eddie munson x fem!reader
word count: 2.5k words
summary: in which it was a drunkenly suggested idea that actually didn’t sound too bad, and it was somehow easy to turn your friendship into something a little different. the hardest part should be keeping it a secret, but instead, it’s making sure that things don’t change more than they already have
warnings: explicit language, friends with benefits, sexual tension, implied smut, a lil angst 
author’s note: first time writing for eddie (finally!) this is slightly based off the song “homegirl” by king princess. specifically the line “we’re friends at the party, i’ll give you my body at home.” more eddie stuff coming soon? eventually? maybe..?
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
From the beginning, you both had the same understanding of what this was.
Two friends having fun every once in a while. Two friends doing things that two people who were just friends wouldn’t do with one another. Two friends that wanted something completely and utterly not serious because they both had just gotten out of shitty relationships and weren’t in the right headspace to commit to anything. 
You and Eddie agreed on it all. 
And you two also agreed that you could never tell your friends about what you were doing. 
You could only imagine the concerned and confused looks that would’ve been shared amongst them all if you and Eddie sat them down and told them about what had been happening for the past five months. Steve would think it was kinda weird and so random. Robin would say the same thing and also add that you two being each other’s rebounds would only mess things up within the friend group in the long run. Nancy would go on and on about how this was not the way that you two should’ve been coping with your respective break ups, etc, etc. 
Neither of you wanted to hear any of it, so with hushed whispers and the linking of pinkies in the middle of the night— moments after you two had drunkenly made out in the bathroom of The Hideout and were debating on whether or not you should move things to the back of Eddie’s van that was parked right outside— this quickly became the best kept secret. 
During group hangouts and other social situations, you and Eddie were just friends— nothing more, nothing less— but when you were alone, it was different. 
In a way it was fucked up, and on some level you both could recognize that. Falling into each other’s beds most nights was definitely not a good way to cope and deal with everything, just like Nancy would’ve told you both, but so far it was working perfectly fine. And how easy and okay it all was— how it somehow never felt weird or wrong to flip that switch and change your friendship into what it now was— only sometimes confused you. 
And just for a moment, as you and Eddie sat in his van outside of Steve’s house, you were hit with that confused feeling that also slightly surprised you. It was fleeting, as quick as it came it was washed away, and then it was forgotten. 
“Come on,” You mumbled against his lips before fully pulling away. “We need to go inside before they think we got into a tragic car crash while going to get this fucking ice.” 
“One more minute,” Was all Eddie said in response as his lips found your neck. 
You savored the feeling for a second before your hands came up to his chest to softly push him away. “Nope, no way. Do not give me a hickey right now, Munson.”
He only laughed and you simply rolled your eyes at the sound as you opened the door and stepped out of his van. You headed to the back and Eddie followed suit, opening the doors so that you two could grab the ice that you’d been tasked with getting forty minutes earlier. You picked up one and he grabbed the other two, and then you pushed the doors back shut with your free hand. 
“How you getting home tonight?” Eddie asked you. You knew what his question really meant— Are we going home together?
“Not sure yet. Might stay with Robin since it’s her birthday and she said she’s probably gonna just spend the night here. Or I’ll drive with Nance,” You answered, shoulders lifting in a small shrug. 
Neither of those things would end up happening, you knew that you’d probably be leaving here with Eddie in a few hours. But it was nice to tease him right then, push his buttons a bit. 
He only smiled at you, easily reading through the bullshit laced within your words, and was completely okay with playing along. “Okay, got it. I guess I don’t have to worry about bringing you home.” 
“Guess not.”
You two were already standing in front of Steve’s front door, but you simply held Eddie’s gaze for a few beats longer, the smallest smile playing on your lips, before you pushed the door open and the teasing conversation immediately became drowned out by the music. 
Steve waved you both over to the kitchen. “Finally, you’re back.” 
“There was some traffic,” Eddie told him and Steve surprisingly didn’t question the excuse— even though there being traffic in Hawkins was an insanely far-fetched statement to make. 
You handed the bag of ice in your hand over to Steve, which he put in the freezer and then he and Eddie poured the others in the coolers that sat on top of his kitchen island that had beers and sodas in them. 
You were about to walk away— see if you could find Robin, maybe wish her happy birthday for the third time tonight— but Steve slung an arm around you before you could. “I need you to be my beer pong partner.”
“Y’know, Steven, I don’t think it can really be considered as a partnership if I’m the one doing all of the work to make us win,” You said, but still let him drag you to the table littered with red solo cups anyway. 
Two rounds of beer pong later, both of which you and Steve— mainly you— won, you were slightly tipsy. Definitely nowhere near drunk enough to do the karaoke that was set up in the living room, like Robin, Vickie, and Nancy. Although you did enjoy their very theatrical and soulful performance of Somebody to Love by Queen. 
However, you were just the right amount of tipsy to smile when you spotted Eddie through the throngs of people, smoking weed on the couch and talking to Gareth. A part of you wanted to walk over and settle yourself in his lap, but thank God your thinking was still somewhat logical and you reminded yourself that you couldn’t do that. 
Instead, you settled for sitting on the arm of the couch and feet resting on the dark cushion, close enough to Eddie but not so much that it would raise a thousand alarm bells by your friends if they saw you two right then. He looked up at you for a brief second, giving you a small smile that practically melted your insides, and you were the one who had to pull your eyes away from his first. 
A silent conversation played out in a matter of seconds— he held the joint out toward you in offering, not even breaking the conversation with Gareth as he did so, and you grabbed it, taking a long drag before handing it back to him. 
You were only half-paying attention to what they were talking about, some new horror movie that you hadn’t gotten around to seeing yet. All you could really focus on was Eddie moving a bit and leaning against your legs. 
It wasn’t something that was entirely un-innocent— you could’ve easily pictured Robin or Steve or Nancy doing the same thing— but coming from Eddie it nearly drove you insane, and you had a feeling that he knew that. It was always the simplest of touches that made you essentially fold for him, when he’d place a hand on your knee whenever you were in the passenger seat of his van or when his hand would find the small of your back whenever you were at The Hideout and surrounded by way too many people. 
And it was especially easy to fold when you weren’t fully sober.  
You looked down at him and noticed the smirk on his face and you had to hold back your eye roll. If he was going to tease you, you were willing to do the same back. 
You abruptly got up from the couch. “I’m gonna go to the bathroom.” 
You didn’t wait for his response before you started walking away, but you hoped that he picked up on the request that was hidden beneath your words. 
The first floor bathroom was luckily empty and you flicked on the light as you closed the door behind you and faced the mirror above the sink. You were only looking at yourself for a brief second before the door opened and you turned around to face Eddie. 
The same fucking smirk was on his face as he pushed the door closed and locked it behind him and then immediately reached out for you. “C’mere.”
“Mm-mm.” You shook your head as you stepped back away from him. “I just wanted to talk.”
He let out a small laugh at that. “Okay, yeah, let’s talk.”
You leaned back against the sink and looked up at him. “So, what was that movie you and Gareth were talking about?”
He stepped closer to you, closing a bit of the small distance between you two. “A dumb horror movie.”
It was hard to ignore the feeling of his hands coming up to your waist, but you still did so anyway and you didn’t push him away. “Okay, so I shouldn’t go see it?”
Eddie only shook his head no in response. He started slowly rubbing your sides, his warm touch practically burning a hole in the dark high-waisted jeans you were wearing. 
“Do you have any recommendations?” You asked as your arms came up to loosely circle his neck. “I wanna watch something I haven’t seen before.” 
He didn’t answer your question that time around and instead leaned in to kiss you. But, you turned your head at the last second and he groaned into your neck, which only made you smile. 
“We can watch any movie you want right now if you let me take you home,” He mumbled, lips humming against your neck. 
“I have a feeling that we wouldn’t be watching the movie if that happened,” You said and held back your laughter at the second groan he let out. “And besides, we can’t leave yet. The cake hasn’t been cut and we haven’t even sung happy birthday. Don’t you remember how birthday parties work, Munson?”
“Your pretty face is making it really hard to remember anything, sweetheart,” He told you, pulling away and a hand came up to stroke your cheek. The cool feeling of the rings on his fingers brushing your skin was a nice contrast to the burn of your cheeks. 
Things had been changing recently, a shift that neither of you wanted to acknowledge just yet; maybe because it was hard to tell what exactly was changing. And so, things kept continuing as it was.
You shook your head a little and let out a small laugh. “Always such a charmer.”
That time when he leaned in to slot his lips against yours, you didn’t turn your head away. 
“Only for you,” He playfully whispered against your lips. 
He pulled back before either of you could even think about making the kiss deeper and he looked at you so sweetly. You suddenly wished that the light was off and it was dark right then so that you didn’t have to see his face. 
That confused feeling was back, and you finally understood what it meant. It hit you so abruptly and harshly, it almost felt like you were finally being shaken awake to what was so obvious. You liked him— more than just a friend, more than you ever let yourself think before. And you almost instantaneously came to the conclusion that this, the way you were feeling, was entirely one-sided.  
When this first started, it was because both of you were essentially embracing that old saying of “if you wanna get over someone, get under someone else,” and it worked for you. And it wasn’t just the sex, it was the half-awake pillow talk moments after and listening to music in his van as you two sat outside your house when he was dropping you off that meant the most to you, that helped you actually get over your ex and his shittiness. But, you didn’t think that it was the same way for Eddie. 
He loved his ex, anyone with two eyes could see that. And he still loved her, more so than he let on, and that felt like something only you could see. The longing look on his face whenever he talked about her to you, the nostalgic smile he’d get whenever he mentioned something good about how they used to be. It was obvious how he still felt. 
And just like that, the spell that you’d been cast under in this moment was broken. 
You let out the smallest sigh and detangled yourself from him, letting your arms fall to your sides. 
He looked at you, confused. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” Maybe everything. “I’m gonna get some water.” 
You were pulling yourself out of his grasp and brushing past him toward the door, but Eddie’s hand found yours before you could twist the lock. 
Reluctantly, you met his eyes and his voice was soft as he spoke. “You can tell me anything, remember?” 
A few minutes ago that felt entirely true, now you weren’t so sure, but you still nodded anyway. “I know.” 
“So, what happened in the last thirty seconds?” 
A part of you wanted to say it. A part of you wanted to be honest with him. 
But, you couldn’t. 
Because you were convinced of what the outcome would be if you did— you could already imagine the sad and pitying look that would cross his face and essentially say it all. If you told the truth in this moment, it would fuck up your friendship and it would fuck up what you two had turned your friendship into. Therefore, you came to the quick decision that you could bury it all down for however long you needed to so that you didn’t mess anything up.
You bypassed Eddie’s question and instead closed the newfound space between you two, pushing yourself up on your toes and pressing your lips against his. The kiss was different this time around, it was no longer soft and teasing. It was deeper, more needy and desperate, and Eddie reciprocated in a matter of seconds. He turned you both around so that you were pressed up against the sink again and he immediately lifted you onto it, barely detaching from your lips in the process. 
If the circumstances were different, you would’ve fully let him do whatever he wanted to do to you in this bathroom. But, things wouldn’t go farther than this in here; not in Steve’s house, not with your friends just down the hall.
When you pulled away to catch your breath, your lips brushed against his ear as you spoke. “I want you to take me home tonight.”
The smile Eddie gave you made your heart constrict in your chest. It almost made you want to blurt out how you were feeling right then because maybe just maybe he actually did feel the same. 
But, of course, you didn’t say anything. You had another secret to keep and you would force yourself to be entirely okay with that.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。
let me know ur thoughts<333
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Text
Bad Faith Part Two
Part One | Masterlist
Pairing: Harvey Specter x Reader
Rating: Explicit - 18+. Minors, kindly get off my lawn.
Notes: Not beta-read because when is it ever. Read this over six times but there are probably twenty typos that I'll spot the second I hit post, so. Anyway! Welcome to part two of two!! Thank you for reading 💖
Length: 14.2k
Warnings: Angst; fluff! Huzzah!; Reader’s married surname is Hayward; reader is depressed for swaths of the chapter; unhealthy coping mechanisms; lovers to enemies to allies to lovers; explicit sexual content - vaginal sex, oral sex, hate sex, safe sex
Summary: Your life was four walls, a cruddy bed, rickety furniture. You spent too much time awake when you should’ve been sleeping; too much time reminiscing when you should have been moving on; too much time dwelling on the time that you spent with men in your life that probably wouldn’t spare you another thought. 
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“Ross. Mike Ross.” 
“Cut the Bond schtick.” 
“I’m a contender.” 
“Not a chance. Besides, we’ve been over this; you’re Q at best.” 
“Could do a lot worse than Desmond Llewelyn or Ben Whishaw—Hang on, you think you’re Bond?” 
Harvey stopped, gesturing over his body sweepingly before scoffing, “Please.”
“Please is right,” Mike muttered, tucking his hands into his pockets. “You always go to this thing?” 
“...I’ve been once or twice.” In truth, Harvey hadn’t been to the New York City Estate and Properties gala in years. He hadn’t had occasion or reason; the last time he had, he’d made sure that she wouldn’t be there before he’d agreed. Tonight his purpose was manifold—drink good champagne, eat good food, and warn Hayward off of pursuing his lawsuits against his client’s property. 
His client. It wasn’t as simple as all that, but these days, he’d managed to separate her from the work. It was clinical—and clinical was exactly what he needed. 
“Did you see the menu for dinner? I didn’t see a menu.” 
“Get your fill of canapes. I’m talking to Hayward and then we’re going.” 
“What?” Mike pouted. “But I thought we were staying for the ceremony.” 
“You thought wrong. Keep your eyes peeled. Sooner we get this conversation over, the sooner we can get away from this den of cobras.” 
“Never have a mongoose when you need one.” Mike nodded over Harvey’s shoulder. “Found Mrs. Hayward.” 
“Thought she didn’t like you calling her that.” 
“She doesn’t, but around here, it might be better to use that rather than use her maiden name and have someone ask me who the hell I’m talking about…You gonna talk to her?” 
“What for?” 
“So she at least knows what suit to look for when she wants to avoid you.” 
Harvey’s chastising glare was met with a wide, smug grin. 
“Come on,” Mike groaned. “You haven’t spoken to her in weeks.” 
“And have you considered that that may be why things have been going so smoothly?” 
“Fine—I’ll give you another reason you should say hi to her.” 
“You better make it a good one this time.” 
“Jessica is catching on to the fact that you haven’t touched this case with a ten foot pole.” 
Harvey winced slightly as he swallowed the last of his champagne. 
“Fine,” He grudgingly conceded, setting the empty champagne flute on a passing waiter’s tray. “Point me.” 
“She’s at your two o’clock.” 
Harvey turned accordingly, pushed out an annoyed sight—and then felt what breath he had left catch in his throat. 
‘Stunning’ was the first word that came to mind, but in his heart, Harvey knew that it didn’t do her justice. For his lingering, abiding annoyance with her, and with them—with the whole goddamn situation—there were moments when Harvey remembered why he’d fallen in love with her in the first place. 
She didn’t want to be there. Harvey didn’t need to ask to know that—it was common sense. But that didn’t stop her from showing her face, from being impeccably dressed, and maintaining what had to be a meticulously constructed poker face. 
“...You do know what staring isn’t talking, right?” 
Mike’s amusement cut into Harvey’s reverie, and he cleared his throat to refocus himself. 
“Keep an eye out for Hayward,” Harvey ordered before he forced himself forward, slowly weaving through the crowd. 
What the hell was he even going to say to her? Hi wasn’t going to cut it; Come here often? Was almost as stupid. How about something about her dress—Whether or not it was new? That had to be safe, neutral ground— 
Harvey had been so focused on what he planned to say that he hadn’t clocked her turning to face him. He chalked it up to panic radar—her hype-sesitivity given the current situation. He stared. She watched. And then—
“Come here often?” 
Damnit. Stupid, sure, but at least it wasn’t hi. 
-- 
“...Annually, at least.”
Was it your imagination, or was Harvey…Nervous? At the very least, he seemed as confused as you were at the fact that he was talking to you. 
“I’m a little surprised that you made a showing,” He admitted. 
“I could say the same for you. Does Jessica have you prospecting clients to get back in the good graces of the real estate department at the firm?” 
Harvey’s eyes narrowed with playful intrigue,and for a moment, you saw a flash of the man that you used to know—the man who gave you that same look when you slipped your panties off and tucked them into his jacket pocket to find later. 
“What did Mike tell you?” 
You shrugged nonchalantly, glancing around. 
“Nothing impor—...Tant.” You trailed off, falling still and quiet as your eyes landed on Steven. 
Well, he was hard to miss. 
Standing at 6’3, with a manufactured tan, swimmer’s build, full head of gracefully graying hair, and veneers that made his smile look like a neatly arranged row of chiclets gum, Steven Hayward was the very picture of the kind of health that only wealth could buy. With the stress of the last few weeks, you knew that you weren’t looking your absolute best. You’d had so many sleepless nights; you’d swapped out your favorite catered meals in favor of cheaper alternatives, or dollar slices of pizza, or ramen from the bodega down the block from your apartment, pulled gently from beneath the cat that seemed to always be napping on the exact flavor that you wanted. 
You were certain that Steven lost no sleep over the decision to divorce you, or to pull the rug out from beneath you. You expected him to be in tip-top shape—but you saw hints of his rage as he grew closer. 
“Oh—Hell,” You mumbled, tipping your head toward Harvey. “You might wanna clear out.” 
“You kidding? I’ve got a front row seat to the prize fight of the century.” 
“Target acquired.”
You frowned at the sound of Mike’s voice, but you didn’t turn to look at him as you muttered, “Target?” 
“Darling.” The term of affection oozed past Steven’s bleached-white teeth. He stopped just a couple of steps from you—not near enough to touch, but close enough to see the anger sparkling in his dishwater gray eyes. A pulse of vindication swept through your chest at the tense smile, and the tight pull of his jaw. 
“Steven,” You greeted cordially.
“I’m surprised to see you this evening.” 
“If I had a nickel.” 
“Oh, but you do. Putting all of those properties up for sale, I expect you plan on having more than a few nickels.” 
“What can I say? A girl’s gotta get by.” 
“Anything I can do to help?” 
“Have you considered unfreezing our joint account?” 
He chuckled humorlessly. “Anything but that.” 
“Then wire me half.”
“You haven't earned half.” 
It was meant to cut you down and lay you out, but you refused to bow to this man publicly when the other attendees must always hold you in such low regard as it was. 
“I agree,” You offered, and before Steven could preen in his false superiority, you clarified: “I deserve more.” 
Steven bristled, shoulders bunching tight. 
“Perhaps I should just take this evening’s expenses out of that half.” 
You furrowed your brow pointedly, shaking your head. 
“Mmm…I’m not sure I understand what you mean.” 
“Really.” 
“Mm…N—...No—?” 
“Perhaps you’ve been so busy hocking your clothes like a dog snuffling for scraps—” Your face flared with embarrassment as Steven pressed on: “But there was meant to be a reception at my penthouse this evening.” 
My penthouse. If it had only been the two of you in that room, you may have slapped him. How had he been able to detach, to force you from his mind and his heart so quickly? Had he ever loved you? Had any man? 
The heat of Harvey’s body suddenly seemed to flare just behind you. 
“Ah!” You nodded sagely, “It’s all coming back to me.” 
“What could have happened there, I wonder?” 
“You must not have taken care.” 
“Of what?” 
Of me. “Of anything.” 
Steven took you in for another long, cruel moment before he jutted his chin over your shoulder. 
“Friends of yours?” 
Ah yes. Your personal legal peanut gallery. You glanced back to confirm their positioning before raising your hand to gesture: 
“This is Mike Ross.” The name seemed to knock something loose in Steven’s mind as he shook Mike’s hand. 
“Ah, Mr. Ross. I saw your name on some documentation this morning.” 
“You’re about to see it a lot more, Mr. Hayward.” 
“And this is Harvey Specter.” 
Your stomach lurched as Steve’s eyes widened slightly, lips curling into a smile. 
“This is Harvey Specter?” He didn’t bother to hide his amusement as he proffered his hand. ”I didn’t realize I sent you the worst possible port in this storm.” 
“You didn’t,” Harvey insisted, grasping Steven’s hand firmly. “You sent her to the best.” 
“Try not to drop her this time. My arms aren’t open anymore.” 
Your hands tightened where they were clasped around one another. You forced yourself to keep your gaze set stalwartly on Steven, rather than watch the contentious (and no doubt, painful) handshake that the two of them were sharing. 
“Well,” You chirped. “This was a lovely little catch-up.” 
“Yes,” Harvey chimed in, finally extricating his hand from Steven’s and tucking it into his pocket. “We must do it again sometime. Preferably at a deposition.” 
“Maybe in court,” Mike added. You had to fight down a smile at the sudden swell of support, and a wave of warmth that swept through you. Steven’s eyes narrowed just a touch more before he nodded. 
“I do hope you’ll stay for my speech.” 
“Who’d you have write it for you this time?” You asked. 
“I took a crack at writing it myself.” 
If that was true, it was sure to be a mess and a half. You always had been the one to draft his speeches or remarks—or you paired down any drafts sent over by the agency’s PR department. 
“I look forward to it.” 
Steven gave you one last look before he turned away, slapping on his businessman smile as he went, and raising a hand to signal someone like a politician trying to garner votes. 
“...Why didn’t you mention the forgery charges?” Mike asked. 
“It’s too soon to tip our hand...What table are you sitting at?”
“Thirteen,” You sighed. 
“Lucky number,” Mike muttered. 
“Go change our place cards,” Harvey ordered. “Put us on either side of her.” 
You whirled around to face him, stunned at the tight irritation pinching his features. 
“So we are staying for dinner?” Mike grinned. Harvey blinked flatly at him before reiterating: “Go.” 
You watched Mike duck through the crowd, heading for the dining room.
“Were you not going to stay for dinner?” 
“I’ve gotta eat some time. Come on,” Harvey nudged your arm with his, “Buy me a drink.” 
“It’s an open bar.” 
“Good. Then it won’t break the bank.” 
The press of Harvey’s warm hand to your lower back was far more steadying than it should have been, and it managed to dampen the enraged fire in your belly. 
“How’s that good faith deposit doing, anyway?” 
“I threw 98% of it into an HYSA.” 
“Smart move.” 
“I should’ve made moves like it sooner.” 
“Better late than never.” 
“I guess.” 
“...You don’t have to stay for dinner.” 
“We’re going to.” 
“On either side of me as well, I’m flattered. I wasn’t planning on having guard dogs this evening.” 
“As long as you don’t try to keep us on short leashes.” 
“Depends on whether you plan on doing more barking or biting this evening.” 
“I’ve barked enough for now.” 
“Biting?” 
“If you play your cards right, sure.” 
You didn’t bother to hide your open shock at the blatant implication, but when you looked at Harvey, you found him giving you a surprisingly warm smile. 
“Looks like speaking with Steven has put a little pep in your step, Mr. Specter.” 
“I wouldn’t say that.” 
“What did?”
Harvey leaned heavily against the bar, focus set elsewhere as he tried to catch the bartender’s eye. 
“You and I both know that this is going to be a long road. I like a good fight.” 
“You don’t say.” 
“It’s important to me that you’re ready for it, too.” 
You nodded a little. “It may also be prudent for us to keep that fight directed at Steven, and not toward one another.” 
Harvey took the two proffered champagne flutes, passing you one and holding it up to cheers: 
“I’ll drink to that.” 
-- 
It wasn’t perfect right away. You and Harvey still butt heads from time to time. On the purchases that the judges ruled that you were able to move forward with, you disagreed over terms—purchase price, contingencies, negotiations. But the knots unpicked sooner and sooner, and you reached resolutions faster. Mike hardly had to intervene anymore. Harvey gave Jessica status updates openly, and you abidingly ignored the smug, self-satisfied smiles that she gave you as you left her office. 
With the service and tenancy contracts, the two apartment building sales that aren’t mired in paperwork still chugged along slowly. You knew that it was protocol, but it was excruciating. You felt ill every time you got an email from Mike or Harvey, expecting correspondence that spelled disaster. Every little bit of good news only brought marginal relief. 
You spent most of your days in your apartment, packaging clothing or jewelry that you’d sold online. You got your packages sent off by five in the evening, and the rest of your night was your own—though it often ended similarly. Your logical mind often gave over to your emotions in the evening, and you allowed yourself to slip into quiet, depressed oblivion. The methods varied—slurping down two packets worth of dollar-pack ramen, and chasing that with a few bottles of beer as one of your favorite shows played in the background; curling up in your bed and staring at the ceiling at 8 PM, and laying wide awake with your mind racing until the sun came up; hunting through property listings online and plotting a comeback that felt like it would never come.
You never had visitors. Aaron was so entrenched at work that you  only got the odd text from him. Your former friends seemed to have further aligned themselves with Steven after his triumphant speech at the gala—during  which he had gone out of his way to omit any mention of you from his historical record. You had avoided seeing much of Jessica outside of the office, certain that she would council you on a good divorce lawyer, or encourage you to begin dating, or level another lecture about the stupidity with which you had bungled your last marriage.
For as well as you knew she meant, you didn’t have the time or patience—and some little part of you, some stupid, naïve part that knew well enough that the war was already lost, was convinced that Steven would change his mind.
It was unlikely, considering the magnitude of his cruelty over the last couple of months, and further exacerbated by your actions before the gala. Steven would not let you back into his arms, his home, or his heart. You didn’t truly want to be let back into his arms, or his heart, but you missed his home. You had taken such care in the planning, the curation, the furnishing, the upkeep. You were proud of it. You had been happy, and comfortable, and so goddamn foolish.
Now you were tired, and lonely, and you spent so much of your day feeling stupid. 
Sometimes, when the wind blew just a little too hard and rattled the flimsy windows, you let the sound of it cover your sobs against the paper-thin walls that connected you to your neighbor’s apartment (you’d learned just how much sound bled through when you first became privy to your neighbor’s light argument, which had then turned into a full-on shouting match. They’d sounded like they were in the same damn room with you, wall be damned).
It was one such sob session that you managed to hear someone knock on your door. You sniffled, shifting on your bed. You were certain that the sound was from next door, or that you’d misheard the rattle of the window. But when you heard the second, insistent round of knocks, the source couldn’t be mistaken. You sniffled, setting your beer aside onto the bedside table crowded with empties and pushing yourself off of the bed. You swiped haphazardly at the tears on your face as you walked over to it, calling out, “Alright, for fuckssake!” When a third round of knocks rapped against the door.
You threw it open, finally, wincing at the invasive flash of the flickering fluorescent hall light. You weren’t sure what was worse: the flickering, harsh strobe, or Harvey’s stunned confusion.
It may have been a tie.
“…What is it?” You mumbled.
“Have you been crying?”
“Little bit.”
“Are you drunk?”
“Getting there.”
“…Get dressed.”
“What?”
“Get dressed,” Harvey insisted, nodding over your shoulder. “We’re going out.”
“Harvey, I’m really not in the mood,” You sniffled.
“We won’t go far.”
“Then why are we going at all?”
Harvey opened his mouth to answer, but was cut off by a sudden crash! and the swell of yelling voices from next door. His eyes darted toward it before he nodded.
“I’m not listening to that all night.”
“Who the hell says you’re going to be here more than five minutes?”
Your heart stuttered as Harvey’s hands planted firmly on your hips, steering you back into your studio before he nudged the door shut with his foot.
“Get dressed. And hurry up.”
You weren’t sure what it was—his touch, his firm insistence, or your own distaste for your screaming neighbors—but you turned around and began dutifully rifling through one of your remaining trash bags of clothing.
“Where are we going?”
“There’s a diner around the corner.”
“A diner? How down heel of you, Mr. Specter.”
“I can appreciate the simple things.”
You snorted, straightening with a pair of jeans and a sweater. “Since when.” You glanced guardedly toward him before you nodded him toward the door. “Turn around.”
--  
“You can afford better than that place, you know.” 
You didn’t answer him. Instead, you shoved a handful of cheese fries in your mouth and leaned back to chew with laborious slowness. You expected Harvey to fill the silence, but he didn’t. He just watched, and waited, and stared at you until you swallowed. You nudged the plate toward him, offering: “Want one?” 
 You avoided his openly chastising gaze, tired of the fact that it was the only look you get from most of the lawyers in your life these days. 
“You have that good faith deposit.” 
“I told you where it went.” 
“The brownstone payment is on the edge of clearing escrow. Look for somewhere else to live.” 
“Not yet.” 
“Why not?” 
“It’s not a good idea.” 
“Steven isn’t going to weasel into every potential deal and hold it up.” 
“Forgive me for my skepticism, but I don’t exactly have many friends in this city anymore.” 
“...Are you planning on going somewhere else?” 
You’d be lying if you said it hadn’t crossed your mind. There were cities here you could rebuild your life and your practices, places where you were sure Steven wouldn’t bother to try and strike down your attempts to rebuild your life. 
“Maybe,” You admitted. “I liked Cambridge.” 
Harvey’s lips twitched with a gentle, regretful smile. It was his turn to reach out and swipe a few fries and chow down. 
“Realty up there is pricey,” You added. “Could make a polite killing on student housing.” 
“How does one make a polite killing?” 
“Decent rent and coin-operated laundry. Maybe some paid parking, a few overpriced but conveniently placed vending machines.” 
“Redbull?” 
“I was just thinking about snacks, but you know what, Redbull isn’t a bad idea.” You reached out, picking up a fry and drawing it through the splodge of ketchup remaining at the edge of the plate. “Why did you come over?” 
“I wanted to let you know that the inspections are finished.” 
“On which?” 
“The properties that you didn’t know about.” 
“Anything stand out?” 
“A foundational issue on one of the apartment buildings, but it doesn’t cost enough that it should’ve stopped work.” 
“What about the others?” 
“Nothing that popped as catastrophic.” 
“You have the print-outs?” 
“In my car.” 
“Why are they in there?” 
“I was going to offer to take you for a drink, but you seemed to beat me to it.” 
You scoffed, shifting in your seat. “Don’t get all high and mighty on me, Specter.” 
“You do that often?” 
“What, drink?” 
“Yes.” 
“Are you accusing me of having a problem?” 
“I’m asking if you do that often.” 
“Once in a while.” 
“New for you?” 
“Relatively.” 
Harvey eyed you critically for a few moments before he nodded. “Call me the next time you want to have a drink.” 
“So you can talk me out of it?” 
“So you at least don’t do it alone.”
“I’m usually not in a talking mood when it happens.” 
“We don’t have to talk.” 
“Oh, please. As if you don’t love the sound of your own voice.” 
“Call me anyway.” 
You were quiet for a moment before you nodded. “You know, the thought of you dropping by may just be an effective suppressant.” 
Harvey’s smile widened a little. “Do you want to put the other houses on the market?” 
“I want to walk through the apartment buildings myself before I go through them.” 
“What about the ones in the Hamptons and the Cape?” 
“I’ll drive up.” 
“And Gstaad?” 
“A little trickier.” 
“Could bill it.” 
“I doubt it.” 
“You could, under discovery.” 
“This would not be covered under discovery.” 
“How would you know that?” 
“I’m sorry, remind me who used to quiz you for the bar?” 
Harvey scoffed softly, averting his gaze to the diner counter. “Well, this may surprise you, but a few laws have changed since then.” 
“And this may surprise you, but not only am I aware of that, I’ve also been pretty deeply entwined with lawyers since then. So I’m pretty comfortable making that assertion.” 
“And this? You think I’m not billing for this?” 
“Oh, I hope you are. I hope you bill for every second that it took you to walk up the steps to my apartment. I want Jessica to pay for my cheese fries. You know why?” 
“Because it would kill her?”
“It would drive her nuts.” 
“I can’t wait to give her the itemized total.” 
“I await the enraged phone call.” 
-- 
“You don’t have to walk me back up, you know."
“Sure I do. Gotta work off those fries. Besides, I’m billing for this until I officially drop you off.” 
You rolled your eyes, nudging Harvey’s shoulder with yours. Your depressed, tear-ridden, sobbing buzz had worn off over the course of dinner, and you didn’t think that the mood would creep back in once you were alone again. 
“I’ll walk through the apartment buildings tomorrow and see if I can get up to the Cape at some point in the next couple of weeks. The pictures and notes from the inspection look promising. If I dip into the good faith deposit, maybe I could get the Cape Cod house fixed up and sold before the summer.” 
“Or you could keep it as a rental property.” 
“Mm.” “You always liked the Cape in the winter…For some reason.” 
“I kinda like when it’s all grey and gloomy…and quiet.” 
“Be a good base for your Cambridge operation.” 
“Oh, please,” You chuckled. “It’s not even close. The red line doesn’t exactly go all the way to Hyannis.” 
The two of you slowed as you neared your landing, listening closely. 
“...Think the coast is clear?” Harvey murmured. 
“For now, at least.” You fished into your pocket for your keys. “Thanks for dinner.” 
“Sure. Remember what I said.” 
“I will.” 
“Call me if you need anything.” 
Anything. That was new. You nodded, gaze set on your keys as he turned to go back downstairs. 
“...Harvey?” 
“Yeah?” He stopped just a few steps away, and you had to scrounge up your courage to turn and look at him again. 
“I don’t, um…” You swallowed thickly. “I’m gonna wanna talk about it.” You watched Harvey’s face shift with grim understanding. 
“I don’t want to litigate that.” 
“Isn’t that your job?” 
“Not like this.” 
“Not tonight,” You reiterated, “But…Sometime. Please.” 
Harvey’s jaw went tight, but he gave you a short, firm nod before he turned away. You watched him round the corner, and listened until his footsteps faded and the front door opened downstairs. 
--  
The apartment buildings weren’t anything special. Stripped of most of their insulation, and with several of the windows already removed, the wind that pushed through them made the buildings sound like they were breathing. It was eerie, and chilly. You tightened your coat around yourself as you went from floor to floor, eyeing damaged pipes, areas where someone seems to have come in and rooted around for copper wiring, and the billowing plastic that marks off some doors that have been removed. 
The paperwork on this building listed the purchase date as nearly a year ago. 
A year ago, you and Steven had been discussing expanding your current operations. Maybe he hadn’t gotten sick of you yet. Maybe he’d bought you the buildings as a present and stopped work when things turned sour…Whenever that had been. 
There had been signs, sure, but Steven always had been temperamental. 
You pushed the thought away as you drew in a deep breath, turning toward the stairs. It wouldn’t do to overthink this just now. If needed, you could panic looking at the Hamptons, or Cape Cod…Or Gstaad, if you ever found a way to get to Gstaad. 
You reached into your pocket as your phone buzzed, drawing it out to find an incoming call. You groaned, stomping your foot petulantly before you raised it to your ear. 
“Jessica, I’m a little busy—” 
“I need you to come into the office.” 
Your fingers tightened around your phone as your palm began to sweat. 
“What happened?” 
“I’d rather discuss this in person.” “Jessica.” 
“Come to the office.” 
She hung up without another word. You swallowed thickly, lowering your phone and watching her call blink and then disappear. If she wasn’t willing to discuss it over the phone, whatever it was had to be very, very bad. 
-- 
“Cheese fries?” 
“Jessica,” You groaned, “Come on, there is no way that that’s why you called me here.” 
“No, it isn’t. But I’d like to remind you that you should remain fighting fit and cheese fries are not the way to do it.” 
“My life has fallen apart and dipped into a moderately humiliating place. I think I’m allowed to have a few cheese fries. Why did you tell me to come in.” 
“I have someone that I would like you to meet.” 
“I’m not going to start dating anyone now.” 
“Well, we can attack that another time. This is for your defense.” 
“Harvey’s on that.” 
“Your divorce.” 
“You know that I can’t afford a defense right now.” 
“I don’t mind getting a start while you get the pieces in place.” 
The man’s voice caught you off-guard, and you turned to find a man leaning in the doorway. Your brow furrowed a touch as you took him in—the long lean of his body, the neatly fitted charcoal suit and sky-blue tie, the curl of his dark hair, the twinkle of his warm chestnut eyes, and his small, intrigued smile. 
“Well that’s very kind of you, whoever the hell you are, but I don’t exactly have anything on the board right now.” 
“The fact that you even have a board is encouraging.” 
“...This metaphor is beginning to exhaust me.” 
“This,” Jessica stepped past you to gesture the man deeper into the room, “Is David Alford.” 
“Alford?” You repeated. “Like the plea?” 
“No relation. What would you know about an Alford plea?” 
“I know of it.” 
“How’s that?” 
“Well, I used to date a lawyer.” 
“Lucky guy.” 
“I don’t think he’d agree with you, as evidenced by the fact that he is no longer my boyfriend.” 
“It’s nice to meet you.” 
You shook his hand lightly, still wary from the ambush. 
“Look, Mr. Alford—” 
“David, please.” 
“—I don’t know what Jessica’s told you about my situation—” 
“She didn’t have to tell me much. Forgive my bluntness, but your name has come up in our circles over the last couple of weeks.” 
“Well, forgive my bluntness, but it’s not my circle anymore.” 
“It could be again.” 
“Are you going to get me a circle back in the divorce?” 
“I’m gonna get you whatever the hell you want in your divorce.” 
You let out a soft, disbelieving laugh, unable to help yourself. 
“O-kay,” You lowered your hand. 
“Why don’t I see what we can do about getting some coffee,” Jessica offered. “You two talk.” 
Your brows furrowed as she waved the two of you more deeply inside. Jessica, at least pretending to get coffee? Damn, she really did want the two of you to talk. You gave David a polite smile as you lowered yourself to sit.
“I’m sorry she dragged you in here.” 
“Wasn’t much of a drag. My office is a block away.” 
“Well, then I’m glad you haven’t come far for nothing.” 
“Nothing?” His brows jumped as he sat beside you. “I don’t understand.” 
“I’m not currently looking for a divorce lawyer.” 
“You need one.” 
“That is beyond the point, Mr—” 
“David.” 
“...Mister David,” You bit out pointedly, and fought back a wave of annoyance at his amused smile. “I’m not sure how much Jessica has told you, but there are a lot of things up in the air right now. I’ve socked away some money for my defense, but not enough.” 
“How would you know what’s enough?” 
“...Let’s pretend that I don’t know anything about the law, or the legal quagmire that I’ve gotten myself into. Let’s pretend that all I know about my soon to be ex-husband’s business is that he has a lot more money than I do. The two of us went into our marriage with about 600 bucks and a dream held together with tape and spit. I have watched, and I have helped my husband build up his business for the last eleven years. I have signed contracts, I have signed purchase orders, I have signed mortgages, I have signed deeds. Even if I wasn’t paying attention to what I was signing, I would know that Steven has amassed a lot of cash, a massive legal team, as well as a significant number of holdings—in both our names. He has a lot of power in this equation, and I do not. Whatever comes down the pike, it is going to be a protracted legal battle. If I was optimistic, I would figure that this would take about a year, but I’m not, and I know that it could take a few.”  
David’s dark eyes darted fascinatedly across your face before he offered: “But you do know a lot about Mr. Hayward’s business.” 
“Yes, I do.” 
“Because it was your business, too.” 
You averted your gaze from him as that washed over you. His acknowledgement made your heart knock hollowly against your ribs, and it took all of your strength not to slouch dejectedly in your chair. 
“...Yes,” You agreed. “It was.” “I understand that you’re discouraged. I would be, too, a lot of women are in your position.” 
“Exactly what position is that, Mister David.” 
His smile flattened with nerves, and he let out a huffed, joyless laugh. 
“I mean, having been served—” 
“A piping-hot plate of out on my ass?” 
“If that’s what you’d like to call it—”
“I call it that because that’s what it is, not because I like it that way.”
“I understand. Look,” David shifted in his seat, twisting to face you a little more. “I think that regardless of when you get your pieces in place, you have a real case here. I think I can get you half.” 
If you had a touch less decorum, you would have jumped out of your seat and screamed—both from the excitement, and the certainty that David Alford was out of his mind. Instead, you blinked twice, and once you managed to unstick your tongue from the roof of your mouth, asked:
“Half?” 
“Yes ma’am.” 
“There is no way.” 
“You’d be surprised.” 
“I don’t think I would, because I’m almost certain that’s impossible.” 
“Well, it certainly would be before.” 
“What exactly has changed?” 
“You didn’t know me. You do now.” 
You smiled in spite of yourself at the brash, almost fearless way that he said it. As skeptical as you were, you knew that this was exactly what you needed: someone as bold, confident, and fearless as—
“What a cozy little conference this is.” 
You turned back at the sound of Harvey’s voice, smiling a little. “Looking to join the fun?” 
“If I can hazard a guess at Jessica’s matchmaking, Alford is the one joining the fun.” 
“Specter,” David greeted, pushing himself out of his seat. “Haven’t seen you at the squash courts recently.” 
“I’ve been trolling the back nine,” Harvey offered, shaking David’s hand. “Nice to see you, Pleas and thank you.” 
Your brow furrowed at the term. “What?” 
“It’s what some of the guys at the club call me. You know, my name—” 
“Alford pleas and thank you.” You scrubbed your hand across your brow. “God, that’s dumb.” 
“We can’t all be queens of quip.” 
“You poor things,” You shot back scathingly. Harvey shot you a wink before turning back to David. 
“So, David, whaddaya say?” Harvey plied. “You filling the gap?” 
“Yeah, I’d love to fill ‘er in.” 
You didn’t miss his innuendo, nor the speculative, open, sweeping gaze that David leveled at you. Your brows inched toward your hairline, stunned at his brazenness. Surely you hadn’t seen it right—
“Coffee?” 
Your focus was broken at the sound of Jessica’s voice, and the sight of a coffee tray being wheeled in behind her. You let yourself be busied by it. You focused on your coffee, made it the way you liked, and let Jessica and David and Harvey talk about what you could reasonably expect out of the divorce battle. 
Reasonably, as if this entire situation hadn’t been insanely unreasonable. 
But you let yourself sit, and listen, and save your speculation for the train ride home. 
You must’ve read his look wrong, or misunderstood. He didn’t mean it like that. 
And even if he did, finding that look intriguing was incredibly appropriate. But it didn’t matter! Because he didn’t mean it like that. 
…And even if he did, it was probably just something that he tried to bring you on board. But it didn’t matter, because he did not mean it like that. 
Though if he did, it really wouldn’t matter, because it would be grounds for him to be disbarred. Nothing was going to happen…Even if you did find him attractive, and found his blunt approach and self-assured nature very, very hot. 
But you were not going to fuck him.
--  
“Don’t fuck him.” 
You had expected the warning to come from Jessica, but to hear it from Harvey of all goddamn people made you gape at him in shock. He just gave you a knowing look before he turned back toward the beer that he was opening. 
Your urge to have a drink that evening hadn’t been strong, but it had been there, and it had made you think of Harvey’s offer from the day before. You hadn’t expected such a quick response to your simple text of ‘Beer?’, but he had turned up a mere half hour later, a fresh six pack in hand. He had shrugged off his jacket, tossed it on to your bed, and walked over to your kitchenette—where he proceeded to say the most heinous thing.
“Excuse me?” You finally managed. 
“You heard me.” 
“I don’t think I did, actually, not properly, because it sounded like you just gave me an order that you had no business giving.” 
“I have plenty of business.” 
“No—” 
“Don’t—” 
“No no no, you do not, not here, and not like that.” 
“I’m just saying,” Harvey turned from the counter, planting his hand on the cruddy formica, “That I know—” 
“Do not say that you know me.” 
His expression darkened, and you watched as he drew in a deep breath. “I know him.” 
“...He has to be good, or Jessica wouldn’t have pulled him on to my case.” 
“He’s a good lawyer, but he’s a scuzzy asshole.” 
“I know the type.” 
“You think I’m a scuzzy asshole?” 
Your gut dropped at the hint of anger seeping into his tone. 
“I meant Steven.” 
Harvey turned away, hand curling into a fist and knocking lightly on the counter. 
“Just…Be careful with him.” 
“You are the last person that has any right to lecture me on the care that I ought to take with the men in my life.”
“I’m not lecturing you—” 
“No, you’re warning me off, like a little kid that’s playing too close to an electric fence.” 
“It wouldn’t be the first time.” 
“Fuck you.” 
“Fine by me, as long as you don’t fuck David.” “Alright, you know what,” You pushed off of your bed, striding over to your door. “Get out.” 
“We’re not done talking about this.” 
“Yes, we are. Get out.” 
“We’re not done until—” 
“We’re done when I say we’re done!” You began to yank your door open. Harvey was across your small space in a moment, palm flat against the door as he shoved it shut behind you. 
“And what the hell gives you the right to decide that?” 
“Because it’s my turn!” You barked. “I get to decide when we’re done now.” 
“It stopped being your turn when you stormed out of my office.” 
“Then make the damn decision yourself and get the fuck out of my apartment!” 
“If you want to ruin that man’s career and your chances of getting anything that you want out of your divorce, you go right ahead.” 
“I am not going to fuck him, and I’m not going to get him disbarred, you ass.” 
“Good.” 
“And I deeply resent the implication that I’m so sex-starved and desperate that I’m willing to fuck anyone who gives me any goddamn attention.” 
“I did not—” 
“Yes, you did, you did the second you opened your mouth. By rights, if that’s your view of me, I should’ve tried to not only fuck Mike, but you, of all people.” 
“I never implied that you were sex starved, but if you were, you could do a lot worse than Mike—” 
“Oh, really—” 
“And a helluva lot worse than me.” 
“Oh, please! There is no way that I could do worse than you. There are dictators that I’d sooner fall into bed with.” 
“If all you’re cutting out is the bed, I can work with the rest.” 
You could’ve slapped him. He was close enough, and you could just imagine it—the way the flush of red would look spreading across his cheek. 
“What makes you think I’d ever allow you anywhere near me again, Specter?” 
“I’m pretty damn close now.” He shifted closer, stopping as the tips of his shoes brushed your socked feet.
“Against your better judgment.” 
“You want to put me in my place, sweetheart, you go right ahead.” 
“Don't call me that.” 
“Why not.” 
“Don’t you dare call me that.” 
“Give me a good reason not to.” 
“You haven’t earned it back.” 
“Any idea of how I might do that?” 
You bit him. You grasped his tie, tugged him in, and sank your teeth into his lower lip. You expected an argument, but Harvey just groaned, grasping you by the hips and shoving you back against the door. You released his lip, groaning as he swept his tongue into your mouth. Your hand unwound from his tie, breath leaving you in harsh puffs as Harvey’s smearing kisses trailed down your jaw to your neck. You arched up into his touch as his hands slipped under your t-shirt, palming and squeezing whatever skin he could reach. You reached down, hands fumbling with nerves and heat as you worked off his belt. 
Every time your mind began to race, Harvey managed to quiet it, with his teasing tongue, and nipping teeth, and grasping fingers. For all of his big talk about getting David disbarred, Harvey suddenly seemed to not give a damn about his own career—
You whined as Harvey yanked down the cup of your bra, knuckles toying with your pebbling nipple. You palmed his hardening cock through the soft fabric of his trousers, thrilling in his moan, and the press of his hips up against your touch. His fingers snaked beneath the band of your sweatpants, sweeping against your clit before swiping slower. 
“You’re already so goddamn wet,” He growled, easing a finger into you. You pressed into his touch, gritting your teeth as he goaded: “You like pissing me off this much?” 
“Condom?”
“Left pocket.” 
You reached into his pocket, brushing against his cock as you drew out the foil packet. Why wasn’t it tucked somewhere discreet, like his wallet? You pushed the thought away as you ripped the foil packet open with your teeth. Harvey let go of you just long enough to shove his pants down around his thighs, then push your sweatpants. 
“Turn around.” 
You passed him the condom before doing as you were told, leaning heavily against the door. You expected a stretch, but slick heat pressed between your spread thighs. Your mouth dropped open in a moan, eyes squeezing shut as Harvey lapped and laved your slick, heated skin. You reached back, fingers scrabbling to grasp the neat coif of his hair. 
“Harvey, damnit,” You gasped. “Just fuck me already.” 
He groaned in dissent, giving your lips one more sucking kiss before straightening fully. You felt one palm smooth over to your thigh, and saw the other rest against the door as he eased into you. Your lips parted with a gentle whine at the pleasurable throb of his cock stretching you. You planted your hand on the door beside his, steadying yourself as you adjusted.
He didn’t give you long. Harvey drew back before his hips snapped sharply. You pressed your cheek to the door, skin growing clammy between the flimsy particleboard and the hot panting of your breath. The harsh slam of his hips forced your body uncomfortably against the door. You let your eyes slide closed as Harvey’s hands covered yours, drawing them just above your head as he intertwined your fingers. The door rattled in the frame with each thrust. You whimpered as Harvey pressed his face into your neck, felt his hot breath and the rumble of his groans against your skin. 
Your thighs ached, and your heart pounded, and your cunt throbbed, and goddamn it felt so fucking good. 
The swell of your orgasm rose and crested sharply, and you didn’t bother to hide the shuddering of your moan, your grip tightening on Harvey's hands. He followed close behind, hips pounding and juddering before he slowed. The two of you stood still for a few long moments, listening to one another’s panting and coming down. Harvey carefully extricated your hands from yours, drawing away and leaving you half-bare and chilly against the door.
“...I need a beer,” Harvey muttered, voice hoarse.
“You left one on the counter.” 
“You want one?” 
“Yeah.” 
You reach down, tugging up your sweatpants as you gently peel yourself back from the door. 
“It’s probably going to be lukewarm,” Harvey warned.
“I don’t care.” You drew in a shaky breath as you walked back toward your bed. You’d already sworn that you wouldn’t let him into it. You lowered yourself to sit beside it, looking at the door as the swirl of confused thoughts shifted back to the fore. You watched Harvey tie off the condom and drop it into your trash bin. You tracked his movement—from cleaning up, to doing up his pants, to washing his hands. You didn’t bother to hide your open speculation as he opened another beer, then took the two up. You drew your legs together, biting your lip as your slick cunt pulsed.
Harvey lowered himself to sit beside you, holding a beer out and lightly knocking his against yours before you each took a drink. You winced a little at the taste. You should’ve listened to him—the taste of lukewarm beer was not appetizing. You saw Harvey reach up out of the corner of your eye as he loosened his tie. 
“...What was that about getting someone disbarred?” 
“Shuddup.” There was no heat to how he said it, and that was probably why it made you snort a laugh. 
“Harvey?” 
“What.” 
“Did you come over planning to fuck me?” 
“What?” 
“Why was there a condom in your pocket?” 
“I had a date.” 
Your brow furrowed as you took that in. 
“...When?”
“Tonight.” 
“Why aren’t you there?” 
“Because I’m here.” 
Harvey Specter broke a date. Harvey Specter broke a date for you. You leaned back against the bed again, biting the inside of your cheek to quell a wide grin. 
“Don’t read into it,” He added. 
“I’m not reading into anything…Apart from the fact that you seemed pretty sure you were going to get laid.” 
“I was.” 
“Arrange for that, did you?” 
“No need to arrange anything. I’m just good like that.” 
“Well. Can’t argue with that. For the record—” 
“What.” 
“You really have no say over who I do and don’t fuck.” 
“I know.” 
“Good.” 
“...You going to the Hamptons next weekend?” 
“Yeah.” “How are you getting up there?” 
“I was going to take the train.”
“I could give you a ride.” 
“You already have.” You cast Harvey a knowing smile, grin widening as he shot you a sidelong, unimpressed glance. Your smile turned to giggles as Harvey seemed to smile in spite of himself. 
“You really think we could stand to be in the car with one another for more than twenty minutes?” You prodded. 
“If not, we could always pull over and work out our differences.” 
“Pfft. No other weekend plans?” 
“Nope.” 
“Didn’t promise a rain check?” 
“Didn’t specify when it might happen.” 
“Mm. And why would you want to come with me?” 
“Steven could be watching those properties, waiting for you to turn up. You could benefit from having back up.” 
“You make it sound terribly sinister. Have you figured out how to bill Gstaad yet?” 
“I’m working on it.”
“Keep me updated.” 
“Sure.” 
“I don’t mean for, you know—I don’t want a vacation.”
“You’ve earned one.” 
“Whatever, I just don’t like to put something on the market without doing a walk-through myself.” 
“I understand.” 
You leaned back against the bed a little more heavily, gaze wandering toward the door, where a little bit of your makeup was smeared from the press of your cheek. 
“...Harvey?”
“Mm?” 
“Can we talk about it?” 
“The sex or the other thing?” 
“The other thing.” 
“I’ve already had one fight with you today. I don’t think I have the capacity for two...Do you?”
You shook your head. 
“Some other time,” He promised. 
“Sure.” 
-- 
You had seen the paperwork and the inspector’s notes, but to see the house in the Hamptons was a whole other story. The long gravel driveway was lined with a horse fence on the left, and a plain wood fence on the right. You didn’t bother to hide your open, stunned stares as you passed the stables. It was hardly the first time you’d seen a home like it, but it was unfathomable that Steven seemed to have not only put the house in your name, but completely forgotten about it. 
Harvey pulled the car into the neatly manicured lot. 
“Do you want to start in the stables, the house, the pool, the tennis court…?” He shut the car off, waiting for your reply. You shook your head. 
“I only care about the house,” You admitted. 
“So we won’t be walking the expansive lawns? I brought my sneakers.” 
“Do I even want to know how expensive those sneakers are?” 
“They’re worth more than your apartment.” 
“I’m willing to believe that.” You climbed out of the car, eyeing the inspector’s report as you rounded toward the front steps. You turned from the paperwork to take in the house’s appearance more clearly. It was…Ugly. The large, L-shaped, gray-brick building had the modernistic development of the fast-casual apartment buildings in the city, with some of the gauche touches of your penthouse, like the expansive floor-to-ceiling covering nearly the entirety of the bottom of the floor. You could see a balcony on the left side of the house, and another around the other end of the L. 
“...This is different.” 
“It’s criminal,” You muttered. 
“Are you saying that because he forged your signature, or because it’s ugly as sin?” 
“Both. Come on.” 
You walked up to the front door, punching in the code that the realtor had given you to get the door open. 
The foyer was as flat and uninspired as the outside of the house—white marble floors, grey walls, and sterling silver furnishings. You grimaced as you looked around. 
“Are we doing a complete walk through of this millennial grey gulag?”
“If you’re going to hate it, you can wait in the car,” You offered, glancing toward Harvey. “Apparently there are fifteen bedrooms and nine bathrooms, and I don’t know how much of your cute commentary I can deal with today.” 
“Seemed to handle it fine in the car.” Harvey turned left before you could say or do anything else, and you followed him, looking down at the property’s map. 
“This place oughta have one of those fricking mall maps with a star labeled ‘You Are Here’,” You grumbled. 
“Now who’s making cute comments.” 
– 
“My feet hurt,” You groaned, plopping onto a boxy, stiff-cushioned couch. 
“You’d think after the last couple of months of living in that walk-up, you’d be in better shape.”
“You’d think.”
“It’s all those cheese fries.”
“Oh—shut up.” 
“So, what do you think?”
“I think we throw it on the market for 18 million and I forget that it ever existed.”
“Why list it in your name, though?”
You shrugged, looking around. “Maybe it was in both our names when he bought it and the outcome was such a disaster he decided to leave my name on it. I think he designed it.”
“Really?” Harvey’s brows rose as he looked around. 
“Oh, god yeah. Steven can be smart, but he’s never really had any design sense. I wound up taking charge on some of our early flip projects because he just didn’t have the eye for it. He always tried, but I kinda wound up following behind and fixing his messes. If I had to guess, he bought this place to show me that he really could do it, and he just…Can’t.”
“Do you think Cape Cod and Gstaad will be the same?” 
“Doubtful. The report for Cape Cod said that the house was originally built in 1950…what. Four?”
“Something like that.” 
“It looks like he gutted it like he did the apartment buildings and realized how much of a project it would be. Gave up on it.” 
“And Gstaad?” 
“Work out how to expense the trip and we can talk.”
Harvey chuckled, wandering closer. “Should we christen it?”
“Christen what?”
“This house.”
“How?”
Harvey’s brows waggled salaciously, and you laughed, pushing yourself off of the couch. “Oh no, Specter. No way—”
“Why not?”
“You wanna christen every room? You don’t have the stamina for that—And I don’t have the patience.” 
“What about just in here?” He curled his arm around your waist, drawing you closer. “On that stupid couch, over the piano…How about up against the windows?” His voice dropped to a murmur. “There’s no one around for miles.” 
You rolled your eyes despite your amusement. 
“If you said that with the Kubrick stare, I’d think you were going all Jack Torrence on me.”
“Heeeeeeeere’s Harvey.”
“Ugh! God, let’s just go,” You pushed out of Harvey’s arms, heading for the door. “It’s kinda creepy being here, you know. Like Steven’s watching.” 
“The house can’t be haunted, he’s not dead.” 
“He is to me.”
“When are you planning on going to Cape Cod?” 
“Mm…Probably next week.”
“Driving up?”
“Taking the train.”
“Again with the train.” 
“I don’t have a car and I’m not going to rent one.”
“Are you staying overnight?”
“No.”
“You’re going to go up and back on the train in one day? That is a long day.”
“I can handle it.” 
“You’d be more comfortable in a car.” 
“Yeah, obviously—Eyes on the road, Specter.” You reached out, poking his cheek as he glanced over at you. He batted your hand away lazily before turning back to the road. 
“Why do you always insist on doing things in the most difficult way possible?”
“Because in most cases, the most difficult choice is also the most cost-effective. Efficiencies can be cruel, Harvey.”
“Cruel is an understatement.” 
“I can handle a day on the train.”
“If you say so.” 
“I do say so, thank you.” 
“Stubborn.” 
“...Do you wanna come up when we get back to my place?”
“What for?” 
You tipped your head to the side, waiting for Harvey to glance over before you teasingly waggled your brows.
“Oh, so now you want to?” 
“I wanted to then! But I couldn’t do it if I felt Steven looming over me. C’mon, Specter,” You reached out, gently teasing your nails along the back of his neck, and grinning as he shifted slightly in his seat. “See if you can get me any more out of breath than walking up six flights of stairs.” 
--  
“Hey, there you are! Jessica needs to—What’s that face for?” Mike’s concern fell away at the sight of Harvey’s self-satisfied smile as he stepped off of the elevator. Harvey gave a dismissive shrug. What the hell was he going to tell Mike? That he’d spent the weekend somewhere other than his place? That he had fallen asleep with her, and remembered how serene it used to be to wake up with her? That they’d hardly left her cruddy apartment—hell, they’d hardly left her bed? 
“Nothing. What were you saying?” 
“Jessica needs to see you.” 
“Right now?” 
No sooner had the words left his mouth did Jessica step out from around the corner, drawing him up short. 
“Yes,” She insisted firmly. “Right now.” 
Harvey had the strange sense of a child being marched to the principal as she led her way to her office. She shut the door behind the two of them, striding past him to her desk. 
“Can this wait?” Harvey hedged. “I’ve got coffee going cold on my desk.” 
“Well then, I’ll make this quick. Did you have a nice time this weekend?"
That should've been his warning. It was a solid leading question, and one that, on any other Monday, he would not have hesitated to answer. His eyes narrowed slightly, before he decided—Yes, she must have known that he drove to the Hamptons. Someone would have told Jessica: Mike was still in the habit of offering updates when he thought they would be helpful.
"Yes," He finally answered.
"Was it a productive trip?"
A second warning. Jessica was a strategist, and Harvey knew that any lawyer worth a damn didn't ask a question that they didn't already know the answer to. Still, he chose a carefully middle-of-the-road answer:
"She was happy to go through the home herself, set a listing price. Hopefully we can get it on the market and on its way as soon as possible.”
Jessica took that in thoughtfully, lips set in a placid smile.
"Were there any outstanding features?"
A third and final warning, but Harvey couldn't help but lean into it:
"Are we talking about the tennis court, the pool, the stables, or the thousand lawns?"
Jessica let out a tepid, flatly amused, "Hm," Before beckoning him closer. "Well if those all caught your eye, it would explain why you missed the cameras."
Harvey froze in his step, blood running cold. There was no way—Cameras? His gaze dropped to the laptop that she turned to face him. The black and white footage was grainy, but clear enough. Harvey watched as he wrapped his arm around her, drawing her into his chest. He could still feel the heat of her body, and the plush slide of her sweater beneath his fingers. He could see the gentle, adoring way that she gazed up at him before she nudged him away, leading the charge out of the house. 
‘It’s kinda creepy being here, you know. Like Steven’s watching.’ He didn’t know how, but she had felt it. 
"Where did that come from."
"I'll give you three guesses."
"Let me explain—"
"Explain what!" Jessica slammed the laptop closed, rounding the desk with self-righteous strides. "Explain what idiotic idea led to you putting on a show?"
"We didn't know that there were cameras."
"How long has this been going on?"
"We only went to see that one house."
Jessica's expression darkened as she shook her head.
"Don't play dumb with me, Harvey," She warned lowly. "How long have you been sleeping with her."
It hit him low in the gut. For a moment, he was too stunned to speak.
"She told you?"
"No, she didn't tell me. She didn't have to. It'll be plain as day to anyone who sees that footage."
"That’s not true, we were just—"
"Just what?"
"I was teasing her! It didn't mean anything."
"If I call and ask her, she'll say the same thing?"
He was certain of it. "Yes."
"Would she swear to it under oath? At a deposition? In court?"
His surety faltered, and his mouth worked wordlessly before he pursed his lips tightly. Jessica shook her head again.
"I am not the only one with access to this. Luckily for you—for both of you—she still has a friend or two on the inside. Aaron Delaney sent this to me before he deleted the original. He works closely with Steven, and has access to a few property accounts. He got an alert on his phone that someone had used the keypad to open the door."
"Has Steven seen it?"
"He isn't sure, but I'm not willing to take that chance. Louis will be taking over the Hayward case, and Mike will be assisting him."
"No, Jessica, that's not happening."
"It is, because I'm telling you that it is. You should be relieved. You never wanted it in the first place."
"Things are different now."
"You're damn right they are! What the hell were you thinking? Both of you?"
"Let me see this case through."
"If you see this through and Hayward does have access to this footage, you could be disbarred. You're going to hand the files over to Louis by the end of the day. He is expecting them. Mike will bring him up to speed and assist him until this mess is cleared up."
Harvey lowered his gaze to the floor as Jessica stepped around him, opening the door and waiting beside it. He curled his hands into fists in his pockets as he strode resignedly from the office.
"And so help you," Jessica warned as he passed, "If I hear that you are holding Louis up in any way."
Harvey only made it a few feet from the office before he pulled his phone out of his pocket, hurriedly dialing her number. It rang once...Twice...Three times...And went to voicemail.
"Damnit," He hissed, lowering the phone to redial. "C'mon, c'mon..." It rang once, "Pick up." Twice...
"Hey you."
"Where are you?"
"What do you mean?" She laughed, "I'm on my way to see Jessica for our check-in."
Fuck.
"How close are you?"
"I just got off of the elevator. Why?"
Harvey whirled around, eyes desperately searching for her through the gaggle of associates, paralegals, and lawyers going about their business.
"She knows."
"What?"
He could hear her frown. Harvey took three steps toward the elevator bay before he saw her come into view—and lock eyes with Jessica. He saw her body go tense, before her shoulders sagged with dejection.
"Oh."
"Yeah."
"Hell," She sighed before hanging up.
--
"I'm not going to even begin to approach what you may have been thinking—"
"Jessica—"
"—Putting not only your future, Harvey’s future, and the future of this firm in jeopardy."
"I wasn't thinking."
"Clearly."
"We didn't even do anything at the house!"
"That doesn't make the slightest bit of difference."
You slid down in your seat as Jessica paced in front of you, her pace and turn reminiscent of a caged tiger.
"I did you a favor and this is how you repay me?" She finally stilled, nailing you with a cold gaze. You folded further under the crush of her look, so similar to the disbelief that she had leveled you with at her apartment not too long ago.
"I'm sorry."
"You should be." Jessica strode around her desk. "Your case has been reassigned to Louis Litt. Mike will stay on, provided you haven't fucked him, too."
Christ. "I made a mistake, alright? I told you I was sorry, and I meant it," You insisted. "Don't bring Mike into this when he hasn't done anything wrong."
Jessica bristled as she lowered herself into her seat.
"I don't want you associating with Harvey until this is over."
"Oh—Come on."
"If this footage were to come out, Harvey's conduct and ethics will be called into question. He'll be dragged into your divorce proceedings. Is that what you want?"
Your stomach churned uneasily as you considered it. You knew she was right. You shook your head a little, trying desperately to swallow past the lump that was forming in your dry throat.
"Louis and Mike will be in touch."
"Okay." You turned, heading for her office door, and stopping just before you opened it.
"...Is now a bad time to remind you that bringing Harvey onto my case was your idea?"
The chilling glare that she leveled with answered for her: Yes. It was a very bad time to remind her.
--
“You slept with—” 
“Shut the door and keep your voice down,” Harvey warned stonily. Before either of them could move toward his office door, Donna hurried into view, reaching for the handle. 
“You don’t wanna hear this?” Mike’s brows rose. “You of all people?” 
Donna waved him away, offering, “Intercom,” Before she shut the door. Harvey sighed heavily, lowering himself into his chair. 
“What happened?” Mike stepped closer to the desk. “I’m just—You two hate each other.” 
“Thank you for the reminder. I forgot about that.” 
“Harvey, c’mon,” Mike shook his head as he tried (and failed) to keep from smiling. “What happened?” 
“I went over to hang out.” 
“At her apartment?” 
“Yeah.” 
“Okay, and? Instead of hanging out you…Let it all hang out?” 
“Get out of my office.”
“If that was at her apartment, what happened in the Hamptons?” 
“Nothing happened in the Hamptons. The footage just…We got close, that’s all.” 
“That’s not enough to disbar you.” 
“Because you’re the expert on being disbarred? It’s enough to call my ethics into question…And Jessica’s right, no one needs that headache right now.”  
“So I’m stuck with Louis because you got close? Where’s the Specter spirit? No way are you going to watch this one from the sidelines.” 
On any other case, no, he wouldn’t. Harvey would insist on backseat driving. But on this one…He grimaced, dropping his gaze to his desk. 
“I want regular updates,” He insisted. “That’s all.” 
Mike nodded slowly, conceding: “Okay. But I’ll be ready when you change your mind.” 
-- 
"I'll come over."
He sounded so positive about it—like nothing had happened, or changed. You eyed the remaining trash bags, trying to scrounge up the conviction of an excuse. 
"I don't think that's a good idea right now."
"Why not?"
You know why. You shifted your phone from one hand to the other, tucking it between your shoulder and your ear as you reached out, gripping a bag to make it crinkle loudly.
"I've still got some sorting to do."
"I'll help you."
"Not tonight, Harvey."
"...She's not in charge of us, you know."
You tipped your head back against your wall, closing your eyes. "She's actually very much in charge of you."
"At work."
"I know, but I just..." You winced. "I think she's right. We should lay low for a while. If Steven did see that video before Aaron sent it to Jessica, we're both going to have a whole new mess that we're stepping into."
"I'm ready for it."
"...I don't know if I am."
His silence on the other end made you want to crawl out of your skin. "I can only fight one battle at a time, Harvey—And right now, I'm barely managing the big ones."
"Fine."
You knew that fine coming from him. It wasn't fine. It was I'm shutting down. It was I'm finished with this conversation. It was I'm finished with you.
"Harvey—"
You lowered the phone from your ear as the line cut off, watching the inevitable flashing and darkening of his contact. You bit the inside of your cheek, fighting back a fresh wave of tears. How, after all this time, was Harvey Specter still able to make you cry?
-- 
You became solitary again. Life narrowed. You saw Aaron a time or two, but he was so busy either working or gathering intel that you were hardly able to keep up with him. For as much of a lifeline as she had been, Jessica was still pissed, and you hardly spoke more than you needed to. Mike was a dear, checking in to see how you were doing, but most correspondence led inevitably to discussing closings, proceedings, contracts (and you couldn’t blame him for it; he was only doing his job). 
Louis was…A lot. He was very eager, that was clear, and had been working hard to push the sales of the apartment buildings and the home in the Hamptons through. David and his firm were digging into discovery, and were making headway. 
But you had so little life outside of your divorce. Most of your pieces were sold off, so you hardly had any day-to-day tasks to keep you busy—and everything in New York was so goddamn expensive. It felt like you spent $50 just stepping out your front door. There were days when you simply didn’t. It was cheaper to stay in, and quieter (so long as your neighbors didn’t have a screaming match that day).
Your life was four walls, a cruddy bed, rickety furniture. You spent too much time awake when you should’ve been sleeping; too much time reminiscing when you should have been moving on; too much time dwelling on the time that you spent with men in your life that probably wouldn’t spare you another thought. 
--  
Walking back into the firm was uncomfortable. You’d avoided it for as long as you could, but Mike insisted that there were a few documents that absolutely had to be seen and signed in the office. You’d made it an entire three weeks without so much as getting anywhere near the building. You found yourself avoiding even glancing in the direction of Jessica’s office. It was alright, though—Donna was a smiling, comforting presence the second you stepped off of the elevator. 
“Find the place alright?” She teased. 
“I did, thank you. I’ve only been here a dozen times in the last couple of months.” 
“It’s been a few weeks. We thought you’d forgotten where we were.” 
You smiled tightly. You were certain that she knew everything that had gone on—she was the eyes and ears of the place. 
“You know, it’s the funniest thing,” You drawled sarcastically, “I kept coming to the right building and getting off on the wrong floor.” 
“Happens to the best of us. C’mon.” 
You frowned as she led you away from the usual conference rooms, and even further away from Louis’ office. You couldn’t imagine where the heck she was taking you—and your confusion deepened as she opened the door to a room lined with files. She nodded you inside, a knowing smile on her lips as she warned: 
“Two minutes.” 
Two minutes? Until what?
“Thanks, Donna.” Harvey’s voice made you freeze, and you could do nothing but watch Donna close the door behind herself. You looked down at the floor, your hands wringing as you heard Harvey come closer. You felt him stop close behind you, close enough to feel the heat of him.
“...Are you going to look at me?” He hedged softly. 
“No need. I know what you look like.” 
He sighed softly, stepping around to stand in front of you. You watched as his shoes and pant legs came into view. 
“...And you’re just going to look at my shoes now?” 
“They’re nice shoes. Look expensive.” 
“They are.” 
“Figures.” 
“I’m sorry.” 
You looked at him fully, finally, stunned. You were surprised at how drawn he looked. Sure, his suit was impeccable, and his hair was frustratingly perfect, but you could see tiredness around his eyes. 
“You’re going through hell right now,” Harvey went on, “You don’t need me to pile on to that. I shouldn’t have snapped at you.” 
You nodded slowly as you took it all in. “Well. We should never have, um…” You cleared your throat, averting your gaze again. “It was stupid.” 
“You regret it?” 
“It’s not worth risking your career over.” 
“That’s not what I asked.” Harvey closed the space between the two of you, and you had to force yourself not to lean into him the way you wanted—the way you’d missed for weeks. 
“Harvey,” You warned softly. “I can’t keep playing tug of war with you like this. I’m already at the end of my damn rope.” 
“I know.” 
You closed your eyes at the feeling of his palms sliding warmly over your arms, trailing down until he could gently intertwine your fingers. 
“I’ll be on my best behavior,” He promised, “Until we’re on the other side of this, and your business with the firm is closed out.” 
“And then what?” 
“And then I’ll give you hell.” You spluttered a laugh, unable to help it. Harvey chuckled softly, his nose nudging yours gently. 
“I should go,” You warned softly. “Louis will come looking for me.” 
“Donna will keep him at bay.” 
“She said two minutes. It’s been at least three—” You hardly had time to finish your protestation before Harvey kissed you. You swayed into him, lips slipping tenderly against his as he used his grasp to draw you flush against him. You wiggled your hands from his, curling your arms around his shoulders to keep close. You startled at the two knocks on the door, and smiled as Harvey groaned in irritation. 
“I should let you go,” He mumbled. You nodded, murmured,
“Probably.” 
But neither of you rushed to move. 
-- 
“I'm sorry to see you go. I've enjoyed our time together."
You sort of believed it, given the pinched, almost pained look that Louis leveled you across the desk. And, for all of your work with him over the last three months, you'd gained a sort of affinity for the man...Even if he was a little intense in a way that sometimes confused you. You smiled, taking up the final few documents that you would need for your record.
"I appreciate that, and thank you for all of your hard work, Mr. Litt. It's been..." You weighed your words carefully, "Interesting."
"For me, too. Reach out if you need anything else—doc review, mover recommendations, tickets to the ballet. Anything."
"Tickets to the ballet? I'm impressed." You held your hand out, smiling as he stood and pumped it enthusiastically. "Thank you again."
You were hardly four steps out of Louis' office when you found yourself flanked in the hallway.
"We should celebrate," Harvey insisted.
"And how would we do that?"
"Dinner at La Belle Vache."
Your brows rose as you glanced toward Mike.
"’The beautiful cow’?"
"Harvey's idea."
"With a restaurant name like that, it would have to be."
"Hey, that is not fair! I could be posh."
"It wouldn't suit you, Mr. Ross."
"Is that a yes or a no to dinner?" Harvey plied.
"When?"
"You busy tonight?"
"If I told you I had plans, would you believe me?"
"Not for a second."
"Well, I do."
"Cancel 'em."
"It's with my divorce lawyer."
"And here feels like a good stopping point for me." Mike wheeled around, striding back in the direction that he came.
"What the hell does David want with you after hours?" 
"Deposition starts next week. We're drilling testimony."
"As long as that's all he's drilling."
"Watch it, Specter." You reached out, jabbing the down button on the elevator before turning back to Harvey. He pouted contemplatively before offering: "What about this weekend?"
"I think I could swing this weekend. Is dinner on the firm?"
"It's on me."
"Do you think..." You trailed off, glancing toward Jessica's office, "That the powers that be will approve?"
"Honestly?" Harvey lowered his voice,"I don't give a damn. It's been months. Your business here is wrapped. If Jessica wants to give me a good reason why I can't see you, she's welcome to try—but it won't work."
You bit the inside of your cheek to quell a smile as you reached out, gently straightening Harvey's tie.
"Very forceful, Mr. Specter."
"You like it?"
"It's kinda hot." You turned back and stepped onto the elevator as it chimed.
"This weekend," You finally agreed. "Invite Mike—He's earned several dinners."
"He sure has."
The doors began to close, but Harvey darted in, catching them before they could shut all the way. He darted in, pressing a swift, warm kiss to your lips before he drew away again. You grinned as he stepped back, allowing the doors to close.
--
"As long as that's all he's drilling."
The memory of Harvey's teasing warning was on your mind throughout your time with David, and you found yourself fighting back smiles all evening.
"Do you have any plans for the weekend?"
David watched you from beneath his lashes as he asked, and where that look had intrigued you once, you knew better. You gave a short, firm nod, and insisted: "I have a date."
Your battle with Steven was far from over. You still had forgery cases pending, and your divorce case had hardly begun. But things felt a little lighter these days.
You had a direction, you had cash flow...But you didn't quite have the plan that you once did. You had told Harvey months ago that you were considering moving to Cambridge. It hadn’t completely ceased to be true, but it wasn’t your only consideration anymore. 
There were moments when you could see the glimmer of a life to carve out for yourself: a smaller real estate firm with a few employees—maybe Aaron, if you could lure him away from Steven; a more comfortable apartment than where you were now, but you could live with where you were for a few more months as you got things in order; and, at the very least, a friendship with Harvey. You didn’t know if what the two of you were doing would be sustainable, and you weren’t sure whether either of you really wanted to know—but after all this time, you thought that maybe the two of you deserved another chance. 
--  
“Impressed?” 
It was a fair question, but you were doing your best to school your expression. You didn’t want Harvey to know outright how much you did like his apartment. It was nothing less than you expected—large (though not quite in the palatial way that your old penthouse was), tastefully decorated, with a gorgeous view. You knew why Harvey had brought you up, of course, but now he was just showing off. 
Dinner had been its own round of grandstanding. You and Mike had watched, bemused, as Harvey had gone out of his way to pronounce all of the dishes in a French accent to the clearly not French (but feigning awe) waiter (who you were sure had to deal with this multiple times a day). Harvey had also taught you and Mike a thing or two about wine—or he had tried to, until Mike seemed no longer able to help himself and corrected Harvey on multiple facts about the Rhône valley in the south of France. 
It had been a far more pleasant evening that you had expected to have, and far more jovial than you’d had in a long time. Mike and Harvey were close; you and Harvey had a history; you and Mike had become friends over the course of your time working with him. When Mike had insisted that you all had to do this again sometime, you believed that he meant it. And when Harvey had invited you both up for a nightcap, Mike had politely declined with a smile and a shake of his head, offering:
“I think I should let you two have some time to do…Whatever it is that you need to do.” 
You hadn’t been entirely sure what he’d meant, or what Harvey had told him. You were almost certain that he would’ve been told why Harvey had been taken off of your case in the first place. And sure, now and again, over dinner, you and Harvey had caught one another’s eye, maybe shared a smile. Maybe he’d rested his hand on your knee a time or two, given it a squeeze—because he could. Because the two of you were close and on even footing for the first time in a while. 
“It’s…” You trailed off, shrugging. “Certainly an apartment.” 
“Oh, please,” Harvey scoffed, taking two wine glasses down from the cabinet. “You’re impressed.” 
“It’s nicer than I thought it would be.” 
“You’re dazzled.” 
“I like the kitchen.” 
“You’re helplessly turned on.” 
“‘Helplessly’ is pushing it.” 
“So you admit that you’re turned on?” 
You rolled your eyes, no longer bothering to fight your smile off. 
“Maybe,” You offered, settling onto the couch and kicking off your shoes. Harvey joined you moments later, passing you a glass of wine and gently clinking his against yours before you each took sips. His gaze remained heavy on yours, and he leaned in for a gentle kiss as soon as you lowered your glass. You hummed, raising a hand and cupping his jaw. You leaned back just a touch, smiling as he crowded closer, dipping his head to brush kisses along your neck as his warm palm gently smoothed up your thigh. 
“...Harvey?” 
“Sure, I can show you the bedroom.” 
You laughed softly, shaking your head a little. “Can we talk about it?” 
He groaned, forehead dropping heavily against your shoulder. “Why do you always insist on ruining a perfectly good time?” 
“Like when?”
“Like when we were in the Hamptons.” 
“You thank your lucky fucking stars that I put a stop to that.” 
“Yeah,” He grumbled, leaning back. You watched him swirl his wine in his glass. 
“Please,” You pleaded softly. 
“...I didn’t write the note.” 
Fuck. 
“Okay.” 
“I wrote a note, but…Not that one.” 
“Who wrote that one?” 
“Scottie.” 
“...Okay.” 
“I couldn’t find the one I’d written, she insisted that I couldn’t leave you with nothing.” 
“Well, she was right.” 
“Yeah.” 
You that that sink in for a moment before you pressed: “Why did you leave?”
“I had doubts.” 
“About me?” 
“About us. You know how my parents were, you know…” He trailed off, shaking his head. “You know what I saw.” 
“And you thought I would do that to you?” 
“I was afraid of it.” 
“If you were afraid of it, then you thought I was capable of it.” 
“—And when you got married to Steven so quickly—” 
“Oh—!” The heavy, stunned, indignant laugh was pained as it left you. You pushed off of the couch, standing and walking out of Harvey’s reach. You heard him sigh heavily behind you, chased by the clink of him setting his wine glass down as he muttered, “This is why I didn’t want to talk about this.” 
“Do you know why I got married so quickly?” You whirled around to face him. 
“Because you loved Steven?” 
“I never said that. I thought I loved him a bit, sure, but I was afraid that this,” You waved a finger between the two of you, “Would happen again. I thought he would leave. I was afraid that I would spend my entire life being left. So when Steven showed me the slightest bit of attention, I latched on. We eloped. He wanted a big wedding, but I just,” You waved your hand around, “I couldn’t do that a second time. Any of it. I didn’t get a new dress, neither of our families were there, because I knew that they would all watch me, and him, and they’d be thinking it: Is it going to happen again?” 
“You’re saying your entire life with Steven was my fault?” 
“I’m saying that I made a choice, and that what happened with you was a factor—Not a fault, a factor. And why!” You let out another harsh hysterical laugh as tears welled in your eyes, “Why didn’t you just talk to me? What did I do then to make you think that you couldn’t talk to me?”
“I wasn’t ready!” 
“And we could have talked about that! What made you think that I wouldn’t have been alright with moving the wedding back, or going to counseling with you, or whatever you would have needed to get us there?”
“You wanted to get married.”
“I wanted you, Harvey! I would have waited, I—” You turned away, sniffling heavily as tears slipped from your eyes. “Fuck. Ugh.” You raised your glass, draining it before striding over the counter, desperate to put some more distance between the two of you. You set the glass down and yanked a paper towel off of the roll, swiping at your under eyes to clear away any running mascara. You blew your nose as well before balling up the tissue and lobbing it toward the trash can. You heard Harvey’s approaching footsteps, and you pulled in a deep, stuttering breath as he rested his hands on your shoulders. 
“...There’s no way for me to take back or change what I did.” 
“Would you if you could?” 
“Yes.”
“...Okay.” 
“Do you believe me?” 
“I don’t know.” 
He sighed, pressing a kiss to the back of your head as his hands soothingly rubbed over your arms. You sniffled again, swiping away a stray tear before resting your hands on the counter. 
“You changed the way that I love, Harvey,” You shook your head. “For better or worse, whether you meant to or not, you changed it.” You glanced back toward him. “I can’t get those bits of myself back. You took them from me.” 
“I know. I took them from both of us.” 
You nodded, slowly letting yourself lean back against him. His arms curled around your middle, and you heard a soft, almost relieved groan leave him. You let your eyes close as he pressed a kiss to your temple. The two of you stood there in silence for a few moments, allowing yourselves to settle. 
“...Stay tonight?” He murmured after a few moments. You nodded, smiling as his hold tightened on you again, as if wary that you would change your mind. 
-- 
He had a few more smile lines. His hair still mussed the same; he still made little mumbling noises as he slowly rose from sleep to consciousness. He was still a furnace to sleep beside, and he still held you through the night. It was almost a relief that none of that had changed. 
Waking up in his arms made you feel like it had when you were younger: safe, and loved, and wanted. You hadn't appreciated it when you'd had it just a few months ago, but you were desperate to catch on to every little bit of him now.
You were never going to be able to turn back the hands of time—to go back and warn him, or yourself, or someone that your first wedding day would be a disaster, that it would set you off on a path that you could never have anticipated for yourself. Discussing what had happened hadn't truly healed any of your old wounds.
But as the sun began to creep over the Manhattan skyline and seep into Harvey’s bedroom, you felt closer to peace than you had in a long, long time. 
Harvey snuffled, nuzzling your shoulder as his fingers curled in your borrowed nightshirt. 
“You awake?” He mumbled, the same low, gravely murmur that you had once loved, and missed. 
“Mmmhm.” 
“Want coffee?” 
“Yes.” 
He yawned widely, pressing his face into your shoulder and warming your skin through the fabric. “Bagels?” 
“Sure.” 
“‘Kay.” 
Neither of you made a move to get either. Instead, you combed your fingers through his hair, closed your eyes, and listened to the steady rise and fall of his breathing as you both fell back asleep. 
Tag list: @missredherring ; @fantasticcopeaglepasta ; @massivecolorspygiant ; @blueeyesatnight ; @amneris21 ; @ew-erin ; @youngkenobilove ; @carbonated-beverage​​​ ; @lorecraft ; @moonlightburned ; @milf-trinity ; @millllenniawrites ; @chattychell ; @dihra-vesa​ ; @videogamesandpoorlifechoices​ ; @missswriter ; @thembosapphicclown ; @brandyllyn ; @wildmoonflower ; @buckybarneshairpullingkink ; @mad-girl-without-a-box ; @winchestershiresauce ; @gina239 ; @technicallykawaiisoul ; @coldheart-lonelysoul ; @kathrinemelissa ; @jacxx2 ; @pillowjj ; @chanaaaannel ; @avampirescholar ; @kmc1989 ; @mythical-goth ;
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flynnriderishot · 4 months
Note
i needddd cute pt 2
cute pt.2 - m.s
a/n: i’ve been feeling really bad that i missed the original persons request by a mile 😭 so i’m gonna add that into this part lol
warnings: i couldn’t really figure out how to word it but i PROMISE matt wasn’t being creepy about following her to the bathroom‼️ he just really wanted to meet her. we don’t do that weird shit over here 🙄
also, vinnie hacker mention 🗣️ unfortunately, he has nothing to do with the story, i just needed someone to add💀
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you were invited to a party that a friend of a friend was throwing.
did you know who this person was? vaguely.
in your eyes, it didn’t really matter.
what mattered was that matt sturniolo and his brothers would also be attending this party.
while you didn’t really have to go, you were a good friend and rightfully needed some time away from your social media life.
what better way to do that than to surround yourself with social media influencers? cue the sarcasm.
what made this all the more annoying to you was that it was a ‘valentines day’ party.
as if you weren’t all over the age of eighteen. you wanted to roll your eyes at the thought.
sure, the thought was cute and the idea was definitely there. but as you walked into the house, y/f/n’s hand in your own, you couldn’t help but scrunch up your face at the excessive amount of pink and red that flooded your vision.
“i guess we missed the memo?”
“no, i saved us the embarrassment of looking like we were back in third grade.” y/fn laughed out a scoff.
“i should definitely pay you more.”
while she was your friend, she also helped quite a lot with managing your channel. with reminding you of what your supporters wanted to see, to recording you anytime you needed content.
and though before she would say it was out of the kindness of her heart, you felt bad that she did so much for free. and once you started getting popular, you made quick work to pay her for all the stuff she did in the past and now she practically worked for you.
it was a win win situation. you got a best friend and a coworker all in one. it was much better than your previous partner that expected so much more for doing not nearly as much as y/f/n did.
“i definitely wouldn’t complain.”
you shared a laugh, moving your way through the crowed and to the drink table.
“i haven’t been to a party in a while, what are the odds we see a fight break out?”
a voice behind you interrupted before she could respond, “that would make this place so much more entertaining.”
your eyes widen as you froze up, trying to pinpoint where you may have heard the voice before turning around to actually see who it was.
“hi.” nick smiled at you.
“oh my god. hi.” you pulled him into a hug, pulling away to see him do the same to y/f/n, introducing himself to her as they hadn’t known one another very well.
“it’s so nice to finally meet you.”
“you’re telling me.” you stepped aside so he could lean against the wall with you two, “i’ve been wanting to say thank you in person since you’ve sent me that lip balm.”
“i can vouch.” y/f/n spoke up, “after your live together, she wouldn’t shut up about it.”
nick smiled, “i appreciate it, and i’m glad you like it. ive been wanting to meet you too, you’re like one of my favorite youtubers ever.”
“my god, shut up.” you roll your eyes, nick coping the motion.
“speaking of the live…”
“goodness.”
nick didn’t stop, “what’s this crush you have on my brother?”
“no crush, just…admiring his beauty.” you brushed off the teasing look they gave you.
“it’s definitely a crush. you can’t admire matt’s beauty without thinking nick and chris are attractive as well. they’re triplets.” y/f/n stated matter of factly.
“right.” nick agreed, “we literally have the same face.”
“nick and chris are gorgeous.”
“oh, thank you.”
you look back to see chris walking towards you guys, smile on his face. with just a simply glance to the side, you could see matt following closely behind his brother, eyes darting around him.
“oh.” your eyes widen, chris’ snort echoing in your ears as you pass your soda off to him, “i need to go to the bathroom.”
“no, you don’t.” nick laughed.
“i’ll be back!” you shouted, secretly having no intentions of returning until it was clear that matt wouldn’t be around.
“she’s nervous to meet you.” you could hear y/f/n telling matt after the middle triplet asked what was wrong.
if he was absolutely beautiful through your screen, you couldn’t imagine what he’d look like in person.
you barely managed to stop your face from warming up when you saw him in one of their podcasts episodes, how would you react if you got the chance to see him in person? last thing you wanted to do was embarrass yourself.
“hi, yn.” a voice called out, leading you to look over and smile,
“hi, vinnie.”
“you okay?” the hacker frowned at your unusually tense nature.
“i’m fine, i need the bathroom!” you called out, unaware of the blue eyes that were following your figure, also hearing your statement and making it his goal to get there before you.
“you’re going the wrong way.” vinnie laughed, pointing in the opposite direction of which you were walking.
“right, i knew that!” yoh waved off his drunken cackle, managing to make it down the hall and to the bathroom within a minute. you hoped you were lucky enough to walk in a not see some random couple doing it on the counter top.
as you opened the door, letting a sigh of relief and a short, “jesus”, you were startled when a voice spoke to you,
“take it as a compliment, you’re a lot cuter in person.”
opening your eyes in a panic, you spotted matt, arms crossed over his chest as he stood in front of the mirror.
“oh, my god.”
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taglist: @hearts4chris @timmyandsturniolo @mayhem-72 @luvsturns @knowingnothingnoel @mrsmattyb
tags for this fic: @3kslav @bb-1s-blog @annamcdonalds67 @sturns333 @dracoflaco @electrobutterfly @wolfstarfate @landrysflannel @3mm4yung @strnsblog @lexxxiii-iix @patscorner @lemon-criminal
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lost-and-ephemeral · 4 months
Note
Hi �� I have some ideas for our LDS Boys that could be interesting to see 😁 some headcanons for Boys x reader on vacation for two whole weeks (what destination they choose, how they plan this trip, what would they do, some sfw etc). Another one - Let's say the boys have a friend who has a crush on them and she interferes in their lives and tries to make reader jealous. How will they cope in this situation? Thank you ♥️
HCs: Vacation With Them
Pairing: Xavier x reader, Zayne x reader, Rafayel x reader (seperate)
Tags: fluff, established relationships
A/N: thanks for request ♡ i decided to write the first idea, but! later i'm planning to write the second one!
-`♡´- MASTERLIST -`♡´- 
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Rafayel
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As an artist, Rafayel often travels to other cities for various reasons. Sometimes he's looking for inspiration, sometimes his help is needed somewhere.
But a two-week vacation with you?
Just perfect.
Rafayel will personally handle the preparations for this trip.
He'll probably decide to visit a city with beautiful architecture that will "help inspire him". Like Rome, Florence or Venice. Or any other equally beautiful city in the world.
And have no doubt that he'll pick the best hotel he can find.
Rent a big room with a view on the most picturesque part of the city? Sure.
Especially if this will make you happy.
Will definitely take you to the sightseeing spots and tell you about their historical/architectural value.
Either he's very smart or he researched all this information on the internet before coming here. Just to impress you.
Rafayel likes to visit small cafes that have their own special (ahem, romantic) atmosphere. They don't have to be too fancy.
Loves to take you out late at night. You look magical in the streetlights.
Speaking of which, Rafayel always has his camera close to him. He likes to take pictures of you, being able to capture every special moment when your eyes shine with joy.
At the end of the day, he makes sure to cuddle with you in bed while listening to you talk about what you enjoyed the most that day.
Probably fall asleep at the sound of your voice. But he can't help it, you soothe him very much with your presence. He's not doing it on purpose, so don't feel bad.
On "lazy days" likes to stay in the room with you, no going out for walks or anything. After all, you came here to relax.
Rafayel teases you all the time for different reasons, that's his nature, but in this atmosphere he seems to soften a lot. After all, even here you are his favorite sight.
When you point to something you think is beautiful, he keeps looking solely at you and says, "Yes, beautiful."
And then starts blushing like crazy as soon as he realizes exactly what he just said.
Even on vacation, he continues to make some scetches about your trip.
By the end of your vacation, he'll have a couple of drawings of you in his sketchbook. Like you sitting in front of the window with a glass of wine or reading a brochure while lying in bed.
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Xavier
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Let's face it, Xavier just needs a vacation.
This poor guy is ready to sleep even while he's standing because sometimes he spends days and nights without proper rest.
So a two-week vacation with you is just what he needs.
And it will be the most relaxing type of vacation.
You will prepare everything for the trip together, consider different options and choose the most suitable one.
It is best to choose a warm place somewhere by the sea. So both of you can relax and let go of all your worries.
Just imagine a hotel with windows that are facing the sea. Falling asleep and waking up to the lulling whisper of the waves. Right thing for a good rest, yeah?
During your vacation, Xavier's favorite thing is waking up next to you in this serene atmosphere.
Xavier loves it when you wake up before him (which is almost every morning) and gently caress his face or his hair.
He doesn't have to rush anywhere and can just enjoy your time alone with each other.
Especially when you look so beautiful in the morning sunlight.
Xavier could spend every day, from morning till night, in your arms. And it would be the real paradise for him.
Hold him, cover every inch of his face with kisses. As long as he doesn't have to put everything aside and rush to fight Wanderers, he's happy.
I think he wouldn't mind visiting cute small cafes either. The ones with a cozy and almost homely atmosphere.
When you're at the beach, splash water at him and get ready for a playful battle until he catches you and pulls you into the water with him.
Usually reserved Xavier will finally allow himself to fool around a bit.
Cherish this moment.
After that, he will 100% help you dry yourself.
Xavier wouldn't mind napping on your lap right on the beach. Even the sun won't bother him. His one and only sunshine is already with him.
He likes to watch sunsets with you. When you rest your head on his shoulder and talk about anything you can think of.
But even more than that, he likes to stargaze with you.
Spread a blanket on the sand and get comfortable next to him. Even if you fall asleep in the process, he can carry you to bed, don't worry.
The cool night breeze from the sea can't make you cold as long as Xavier is by your side. He'll keep you warm.
He likes to buy souvenirs so that even when you return home and get back to work, he can look at them and remember something nice.
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Zayne
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Zayne is a doctor, and that's the reason why most of the time he works until exhaustion. Even if it seems that he hardly gets tired, this is not so.
He needs rest as much as any other person do.
And a two-week vacation with you will be a breath of fresh air.
It's going to sound cliché, but Zayne wouldn't mind going somewhere a bit more colder.
Vacations aren't always about warm places, right?
A city like Reykjavik would be ideal, the nature of Iceland itself is so beautiful and breathtaking.
How about combining a vacation with hiking in beautiful places? Sounds good.
Even if you insist, Zayne will still do all the preparations by himself. He will select a city, a place to stay and make sure that you take everything you need. Especially warm clothes.
Don’t worry, he won’t force you to travel miles on foot in order to look at pure and untouched nature.
Most of the time, he won't mind walking around the city with you and popping into a couple of shops in search of local sweets.
Zayne is the type of person who puts both your and his hand in the pocket of his coat when you're holding hands. This way your fingers will definitely not freeze. And also he just doesn't want to let go
Sitting in warm and cozy cafes with you while drinking hot chocolate is something he loves the most. Your smile, your reddened from the cold cheeks. Just beautiful.
It's hard for him to show his care verbally, but his actions speak louder than any words, so he doesn't mind hugging you from behind to keep you warm.
Allows you to take as many photos with him as you want. And there's so much love in his eyes as you show him those photos.
He, too, prefers to fully enjoy his vacation and rest, not dazedly run back and forth. And that's understandable.
But that doesn't stop him from waking you up with breakfast in bed every morning. He says it's easier to keep track of your nutrition, but it really melts his heart to see how sleepy and happy you look at that moment.
It's a huge plus if the room you're renting has a fireplace.
In that case, you can spend your evenings warming up next to it while Zane sits behind and holds you in his arms.
He rests his forehead against your shoulder and lets himself relax completely. You don't have to speak at this moment, just gently stroke his scarred hands, hold them, showing your love and care for him.
He will be sure to keep a few photos from your vacation. Always. So that your warm moments together will never be erased from his memory.
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tadc-ragatha · 8 months
Text
Being Their Friend
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TW: Breakdowns/crises (mentioned), knives, swearing, centipedes, bullying, general mental health stuff, Zooble's limbs being (painlessly) moved/stored/body horror
Type: Headcanons
A/N: Hi. These are just for fun; don't get up in arms if they aren't perfect (they can't be anyway, considering how far into the show we are). Requests aren't open (EDIT: they are open now). Spoilers obviously. Includes only the main six because I honestly don't know enough about Caine yet.
Pomni
Being her friend entails a multitude of existential crises. Everyone's trying to find their own way to cope, but expect to be helping her through many a panic attack. She's a hot mess most of the time, and doesn't really know what to do.
As seen in the trailer, she still gets scared of getting hurt, much unlike people like Ragatha who know they can't be harmed by knives or whatever else Caine throws at them. It'd be your job to help calm her down during these situations and help her adjust to not being hurt.
Other than that, I imagine once Pomni gets (semi) used to living in the digital circus you'd spend a lot of time looking for the exit. She definitely wants to get out of there before she becomes abstracted--something she knows is possible with her mental state. She also just wants to get her and everyone else out of there. Even that jackass Jax.
Pomni would take a lot of comfort in the things that connect her to the real world like food. If she offers you some food, you know you're really friends with her. If she had access to drawing/painting equipment or whatnot, I reckon she'd try to draw herself in her real form (if she could remember). She's like to see what you look like, and would compliment you on your appearance.
Ragatha
Ragatha's been in the digital circus for a while, and is much more comfortable with it than some of her other friends (or so she likes to pretend). She's fine with getting hit with knives as seen in her introduction short and likely wouldn't be scared of dying by anything else. As she said, her only fear is centipedes.
Still, it'll be your job to get them out of her room for her. Everyone knows what an arsehole Jax can be, and she sure as hell isn't risking walking into her room to find tens of thousands of them. If you don't do it, she's staying in your room for an indefinite amount of time.
Actually, I think Ragatha would like to have sleepovers anyway. It'd keep her impending thoughts at bay. Even if she doesn't require sleep, it's fun and reminds her of home. Like I said in Pomni's section, I think she'd enjoy drawing or painting. Or any creative visual art really, but especially drawing and painting for the purpose of making pictures of what you look like outside of the digital world.
Though be warned, the sight of her may send her off on a spiral of homesickness. Since Ragatha serves as a kind of rock of stability (as best as her overly optimistic self can), seeing her collapse may cause the others to collapse, too. Except maybe Jax, but it'll be up to you to try and get everyone back together before abstraction happens.
Jax
First of all, I don't know if this is possible. Not only are we so little into the show to really know, but Gooseworx also said he's going to have some really bad scenes. So, I suppose you won the lottery in doing this...Maybe. It really depends on how you look at it.
Because first of all, he's still a massive dick. He's just rude to everyone, so expect nothing different. He'll still be a jerk to you, "prank" you, or really, just straight up bully you. Honestly, half the time you can't even tell this guy is supposed to like you. He doesn't even really say sorry unless it's sarcastic.
The only way you can tell he likes you as a friend is when he gets all up in arms about you being annoyed at him. At first, at least, he's confused as to why you can't just let it go. Over time, though, he gets more in tune with his emotions and starts to mellow out a little.
However, it does come with the perk of having someone who will beat the ever-loving life out of whoever hurt you. Okay, well, not that far--he's got to keep his reputation as someone who doesn't care about other people, so he'll at most just be a bit of a bigger pain in their side. But it's still there.
Things you'd do together include terrorising the other members (or, he tries to get you in on it, anyway), sneaking into people's rooms to snoop around, and all-in-all just being a bit of a pain. But you also do other things; he seems like he's not one for visual arts or theatre, but maybe he could play an instrument and may--very heavy on the "may"--teach you some stuff. Otherwise, I don't think he's an arts guy. He'd enjoy video games, though, if they had those! And going to the digital carnival for thrills along with just exploring the grounds.
Kinger
Kinger would be an interesting friend. I have two routes for this guy based on a theory I saw. Route one follows him actually being on the brink of insanity/abstraction. In this route, you have to make sure he's alright. Just be gentle with him and check up on him every now and then. But don't be in his face all the time. Everyone needs a bit of personal space.
You can still hang out with Kinger, obviously. You can still talk about things you'd normally talk about, whatever that may be. Just don't bring up the abstracted queen (who I shall be calling Queener). It'll bring up some...Bad memories.
Anyways, my second route is this: based on a theory, Kinger is actually one of the more stable ones in the group, and is just pretending to be on the brink of losing it. Basically, if I remember right, he's pretending in order to get out of the activities/shenanigans of the group.
But no matter what his reason for doing it is, he's smart as hell. Having tricked everyone, it'd take a keen eye to figure it out. If you do, he'd be impressed. Once he trusts you enough, the two of you will discuss the other circus members and how to outsmart them secretly. You'll also just hang out, gossip...He feels like a guy who'd be into drama, with his whole being the actual king thing. You two would do some impromptu skits and whatnot to pass the time.
Gangle
Oh, Gangle. What would you do with Gangle? Well, you'd certainly have to be gentle with her. She's a very fragile soul--and also fragile physically--and needs some care. Help her repair her mask, or better yet, stop Jax from breaking it in the first place. In fact, just stop him from doing any mean stuff to her in the first place.
Other than that, Gangle is someone who'd actually enjoy drawing as a hobby and not just a memories thing. She draws anime, and would make you and her anime personas with cool abilities and features like wings and shit. I imagine her art style is very early-mid 2000s anime, with the really big eyes and whatnot.
Anyways, I reckon she'd also write. Mostly fanfiction when she wasn't stuck in the digital world, but since there's no fandoms to write about now she'd start branching out into her own original stories. But don't get me wrong; if anyone was going to write about their friends and fellow members it'd be her. She just hides it somewhere other than her room. Gangle would like to write stories about your sonas going on adventures and saving the world.
Eventually, these stories probably get found by Jax or someone else (but probably Jax). He'd laugh his arse off at them and would run to tell everyone about it. Unless you can absolutely beat the shit out of him, prepare to do some explaining and also comforting for her.
Zooble
Zooble does not give much of a shit about the others. They wouldn't let them die (at least I think so), but they're in no way buddy-buddy with them. In order to be friends with them, you'd have to meet their strict criteria. So, good job on that!
Being friends with them would either involve lots of gossip because they want to talk shit about people and complain, or it'd have no gossip because they honestly couldn't care less about the others. I can't tell. But if you do gossip, I imagine they know a lot about the other members. You'd be filled in on everything they know, too. They've been dying for someone to tell this too.
Zooble's also very particular about their looks, as seen in their introductory short. They have many stored limbs and whatnot to swap around for their mood. Don't mess with their body by switching around their antennae-like things or ripping off their body parts like Jax. They will retaliate.
Going off of this, though, I imagine they're pretty strong. I mean, they choked Jax like that. So, if anyone (him) comes around to piss you off, you best bet they'll be on their way to beat his arse. Though, it probably ends in a tug-of-war with one of their arms.
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gyusrose · 5 months
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➵ 5-star michelin -> p.js
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⚠︎ smut (mdni) , sprinkle of angst
✎ teacher!jay x student, slight age gap (25 & 23), jay is kinda mean, dom!jay + sub!reader, jealous!jay, praising, dirty talk
summary: achieving your dream of becoming a chef is not easy, even worse when your teacher’s always up your ass.
{btw! i don’t cook like at all so bear with me 🙏}
(non!idol jay x fem.reader)
~ late christmas + new year’s gift *ੈ✩‧₊˚🥂*ੈ✩‧₊˚
wc: 4.2k
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you love the kitchen, you pretty much live there day and night. it’s no surprise to anyone that your dream job is eventually becoming a real chef. that’s why you’ve spent almost your whole life perfecting the one skill you’re good at. most of the recipes you use come from your mom. before she passed she left a whole book of recipes in it and what a hell of a good time you had with it.
it helped you cope, that’s what drove it. you feel sad? make something yummy. you feel mad? bake something nice. you feel happy? cool something delicious. your problems seemed to fade away while your cooking.
over the last year, you’ve started attending culinary school. obviously, you’re not perfect and you still need some work on your dishes but you’re not doing too bad to say the least. now though, it’s a new chapter opening for you.
you’ve been wanting to get out of your hometown for a while and move to the city as there were more opportunities down here and to your luck, you got accepted into a (very prestigious) culinary school nearby your apartment, a win-win situation.
like anyone, you were scared, scared to make new friends, scared to meet new people, scared to start from zero, a new place, a new routine. but it’s all for the better.
you sighed as you tied your apron around your waist, almost heading out the door to your first day of school. boxes were still unpacked all around your floor, it was a total mess, you literally slept on the floor last night. it was definitely not the best case scenario for a great morning but eh.
you finally caught your breath trying to calm down grabbing your tote bag and leaving your messy apartment.
the school was no more than five minutes away walking. at least you’re gonna be on time.
your entered the glass doors of the huge white building. the receptionist noticed you, you quickly showed her your ID, which they gave you during your orientation last week. she gave you a nod and you headed into the elevator, pressing the number 13.
your hands were shaking and sweaty. coming into a new school in the middle of the year has got to be the worst scenario for an introvert like you. you finally reached the room where the class will be taking place ( i genuinely don’t know what culinary school is like pls) as soon as you stepped in, all eyes were on you. including the head chef’s.
“you must be the new student right? happy first day you’re late.” one of them spoke, your cheeks couldn’t have become any redder than what they already were. you hated all the attention on you.
late? didn’t class start at 7:30? you thought.
“class started fifteen minutes ago, take a seat and catch up.” almost like he could read your mind he responded.
you muttered a low ‘sorry’ before heading onto an empty seat trying to take as much attention away from you. of course his happens to you.
you gathered all the ingredients you were told to get and set them on the table in front of you. mimicking what the other students were doing. as you weee doing that the chef came up to your side, an evident scowl noticed on his face.
it was until then you realized how handsome he was, he looked very young as well, not someone that you would expect to be a head chef. his jawline was sharper than the knife on your hand. you shook those thoughts away quickly though, he’s your teacher! what are you thinking?
“i’m just letting you know, whatever you did today can’t happen anymore, attendance is very important everyday, this is a very advanced class so you might not want to be missing any of it, got it?” even though he whispered, it felt like he was yelling at you. it was very aggressive and harsh making you flinch.
you quickly nodded, now scared of him even more. suddenly you want to change classes with another chef. finally leaving you let out a big sigh which you were holding in ever since he came over, and resumed cutting your vegetables and stir frying them.
“you need more seasoning on that, it’s too bland!” the chef, which you now you know as ‘Chef Park’ said as he tasted your chicken. you were almost sweating, from the way he speaks and acts, you felt nothing but intimidated by his presence, even more when he’s tasting your first dish for him. throughout the whole lesson today, he seemed to be only picking at you, he didn’t taste any of the other student’s food, only yours. you found it kind of irritating but tried not to think much about it.
“i’ll definitely note that chef.” you smiled at him bowing.
“ i’m expecting a lot from you, ______” he said before heading back to his space.
you were confused. why you? you’re probably the least talented person in this room right now so why you? you had so many questions but decided that maybe you just needed a good nights rest and starting packing up your stuff on your bag.
jay sighed at the empty room in front of him. it was currently 1 am, and he couldn’t find the urge to go home. he was just thinking, thinking about you.
he was the one that read your application into the school, he read your recommendation letters from your past teachers. you were put into his advanced class for a reason.
what he didn’t expect was the glory of a woman that was going to get in that door. it was as if the universe slapped his type right in front of him. that’s what he saw. how could someone look so beautiful in such a simple uniform? he also wonders that.
he can’t let down his demeanor though. yes he finds you attractive, but he can’t soften up just for you, that’s unfair to the rest of the students that have to put up with him. plus he hasn’t forgotten that he’s the teacher and you’re a student, it’s unethical for him to even be thinking of you in that way.
it’s been approximately a month since you’ve started going to this new school and to be honest, it was eating you up. chef park kept nit-picking everything you did, which honestly is what’s. teacher should do but not to that extent. you saw the way he was always looking your way when you were cooking. how he would yell at you across the room when you did something wrong ( even if other people were also doing it) it’s driving you insane to the point that you’re about to actually request for a change of teacher.
you were struggling to cook the steak to chef park’s desired temperature when you felt someone tap your shoulder. you turned your head around to see a boy. if you’re not mistaken his name is jake.
“i see you’re kind of struggling with that, there’s a trick i do that always manages to cook the steak to chef’s park liking. may i?” he asked if he could touch the knobs of your stove. you nodded and he turned the heat to the maximum for a few seconds, turning the steak over on both sides while bathing it in butter , then he turned it to low heat, repeating the same action.
jay obviously noticed this and did not appreciate it. he should be happy seeing another student sharing tips with you but that wasn’t the case this time. without thinking he walked over the two of your laughing figures.
“sim! it’s very inappropriate of you to be talking with your little friend when you should be cooking..”
“oh sorry chef park. i was just giving her a hand. i thought you wouldn’t mind.”
you looked at chef park, noticing his glaring eyes on jake. is it that bad for a student to help another student out?
“well i do! back to your place.” he said not sparing you a glance while jake decided to not respond back and just gave you an apologetic smile before heading off.
“alright everyone, that would be it for today, but don’t forget that by the end of the semester you’re gonna have to cook something of your own, impress me okay? “
as students left you decided to have a word with the chef, wanting to know if he just truly just didn’t like you or if he had a problem with you being here, so you could change chefs.
there was another girl talking to him before you. he acted so different with her, so respectful, kind and smiley. his face sours up every time he’s talking with you, so you barely see him smile and you almost melted at it.
“is there a problem miss ______?”
you jumped out of your other world and looked at him. suddenly feeling shy. you felt your confidence slip away as he was now looking straight at you, waiting for you to speak.
“ well-uh i’ve been noticing how harsh you’re on me compared to the other students, did i do something to cause that?”
jay was taken aback from your straightforwardness, but he responded either way.
“ you just need more toughness out on you _____, do you want to be mediocre?” he was lying through his teeth. jay knew you were if anything, the best of the class, he couldn’t just say that out loud.
you on the other hand, were crushed. was mediocre all he saw in you? have you been lied to by your other teachers?
“ is the yelling necessary though ? there’s way to effectively communicate without yelling.” you hated being yelled at. every time someone raised their voice at you, tears would just fall like a waterfall. thankfully, you’ve managed to hold in your tears during class so chef hasn’t seen you cry.
“are you questioning my teaching skills now? “
shit. now you offended him.
“n-no that’s not what i meant, i just-“
“you don’t think i’m a good teacher ?” he said getting up closer to you, pretty much standing inches in front of you. suddenly you felt your heartbeat fasten.
“i d-do chef, i just kind of find it unfair?” you said, trying to not stutter all your words.
jay smirked, now standing less than a feet in front of you, grabbing your chin and holding it up, making you look straight at him. jay could definitely see your rosy cheeks that you were so embarrassedly trying to hide.
“am i making you nervous miss _____?” you only gulped, you didn’t even know what to respond to that, even though it was bluntly obvious based on your state right now.
the both of you didn’t say anything for a moment, the two just stared at each other, waiting for one to make a move first.
you don’t know exactly where you got the guts to actually make the move. you engulfed your chef into a suffocating kiss. the kiss itself was enough to show how much y’all were yearning for each other. jay was dying to do this ever since he laid his eyes on you, but you on the other hand, didn’t know how much you actually wanted to do this until now. sure you found him handsome and smart and literally perfect but you never expected for him to think of you the same way to the point we’re he’s actually kissing you back and heating up the kiss you once started. his tongue grazed over your lip. his hands moved from your face to your waist, pulling you closer, melting into his embrace. your lips tasted so sweet, jay felt insatiable.
both of you forgot about the fact that this was very much not allowed. the world ceased to exist to exist at that moment. there were no boundaries, no constraints, just the two of you.
jay’s hand traveled down further and further, now down to your ass, giving it a light squeeze. the small action made you moan into his lips. even though your eyes were closed, you could feel him smirking at you.
your own hands travelled along his broad shoulders, down his shoulders. once again, confidence shot through you. your fingertips found their way to his belt buckle, about to undo it when his fingers wrapped around your wrist. stopping your movements.
“see you next class.” that’s all he said before gathering his things and leaving you there. high and dry.
that’s when you woke up. realizing what you were about to do, more like who you were about to do it with.
embarrassed. that’s what you were. he could literally lose his job what were you thinking?!
you let out a shaky sigh and left the empty room. all you need right now is a hot shower and sleep, you need to forget this ever happened. the worse thing is that tomorrow you still have to face him in class.
you knew showing up in the classroom that the two of you almost fucked in yesterday was going to be hard to show your face in. although no one noticed you, you just felt exposed. you refused to make eye contact with jay the whole time. jay definitely noticed this right away. he felt kind of bad in leaving you like that, but he knew that if he stayed there a little longer, he wouldn’t have controlled himself. he did think though, you looked kind of cute all shy and red, avoiding his eyes the whole class.
he took matters to his hands and approached you for the first time today, which was odd since he would’ve already yelled at you for something at this point.
“what are you working on miss ______?” his voice startled you, not even noticing he walked over to you.
“ just finishing the sauce for this.” you shortly said looking down at your food. jay’s stare didn’t leave your face once. and you could feel it very much. it felt hard to breathe at that moment. you have no doubt your face is boiling at his simple presence.
“ look at me when i’m speaking to you.” you didn’t want to. but he was still your teacher and the last thing you want to be is disrespectful so you looked at him. and god you wished you didn’t. those brown eyes have a world of its own. you found yourself staring at him shamelessly, forgetting he was speaking to you.
“are you even listening?” of course you weren’t yet you nodded assuringly.
“great then see you friday night.” you nodded but it took you a moments to realize what he said.
friday night? for what? this is what you get for daydreaming. embarrassingly, you asked him what he meant after you just told him you were listening to what he was saying.
jay chuckled and shook his head at your lie. “ i said if you were coming to the dinner i have set up for the class, since christmas is coming. and you responded yes, so you better be there miss ______.” he said with a smirk, palming your cheek. your eyes widened at his move. you looked around to see if anyone noticed, to your relief no one did as they were too focused on their food. “someone could’ve seen!” you whisper-shouted your chef. he just rolled his eyes and said “ just be there on friday, i have a gift for you.”
the last thing he said before walking away. you were left dumbfounded. what did any of that mean? you didn’t notice that you’ve doesn’t about 10 minutes just standing there thinking until you smelt something burning.
“your meat is overdone _____!!!” jake told you walking up to you turning the stove off.
shit.
you weren’t the one to like social events much. as a teenager, you barely went out with your friends. you were a proud nerd. always focused on school, that’s how you were thought to be, which explains how you’ve only made one friend (jake) ever since been here for months. now you’re gonna be forced to socialize for a whole evening.
you weren’t unprepared thankfully. you brought a couple of classy dresses with you, you could imagine that things like these were gonna happen. you eventually decided on a white silk dress. it was elegant yet comfortable for you. not too short or not too long as well. you decided to not do anything special with your hair and let it down.
you suddenly felt the urge to not go. the last person you want to see is your chef. you don’t see the point of going yet you kept doing your makeup, you just want to change into your pyjamas and lay in bed all night. a ding in your phone caught your attention, revealing a text message from jake.
-I’m here
it seemed like you have to go now. quickly you gathered your things and left your lot.
jay kept waiting and waiting. you was all he was waiting on. a bunch of people kept coming up and talking to him but he didn’t care. girls showed up trying to impress him, but nothing. he wanted you to come up to him, impress him.
what he didn’t expect is you coming in with some company. jake was obviously invited but not as your date, he thought. he could see his hand on your back as he said a few sorry’s for being late due to traffic. jay couldn’t focus on anything but you. what the fuck was jake saying to make you laugh so hard. was that on purpose? to see how he would react? jay couldn’t tell. it didn’t help how beautiful you looked tonight, more than usual. that fucker doesn’t get your beauty like he does.
the whole night jay kept quiet. stealing glances towards you and jake. when someone talked to him he kept his reposes dry. for a moment he could swear you stared at him.
jay didn’t miss when you stood up to go to the bathroom. he obviously took this opportunity to talk to you, if it wasn’t right now then it was never.
you left the bathroom, as a soon as you turned around, you were encaged. your breath hitched seeing who it was.
“c-chef?”
“oh please don’t act all innocent _____, i know what you’re trying to do.”
“i’m sorry..? i don’t know what you’re talking about?”
“coming in here with jake, wearing such tight dress showing off just enough to make me go crazy. do you realize how much power you have over me hm?”
you didn’t know what to respond to that. deep down you loved the way you made him feel. it was planned, at all, but it felt nice knowing how much little effort had an effect on him.
“ it’s not my fault that’s the way you think jay.” honourifics dropped. jay wasn’t expecting that response from you. the alcohol running through your blood was showing at the moment.
jay grabbed your neck and pulled you into a heated kiss. unlike your first kiss, this one was emerged in lust. both of your tongues entangled with each other. your hands rummaged through his hair pulling him closer to you.
all it took was a simple “wanna get out of here?” from jay for you to weaken in the knees, allowing your full submission to him.
“fuck jay, right ther-shit!” so much happened in the last thirty minutes, nothing could’ve prepared you to be eaten out by your teacher at that time.
you don’t even know how jay didn’t crash the car while driving to his house and completely stripping you in seconds. he ate your pussy like he’s been starving for months (which he was) your eyes rolled back, pulling his hair, engulfing him into you, wrapping your legs around his neck. jay was in fucking bliss.
“shit baby, you’re such a mess, so fucking sensitive.” he said pulling away from your cunt, earning a whine from you.
“such a desperate little brat. tell me, what do you want baby.” he said caressing your lips. you couldn’t stop biting them. from your angle, you could see everything of him. his sharp eyes staring down at you, his biceps, his chest, his abs, fuck you could cum right there.
“fuck me jay, i want you to use me.” unlike other instances, you didn’t break eye contact making him moan before grabbing your thighs and spreading them around his pelvis. your core was dying for his cock, it was noticible from how swollen it was.
jay rubbed his head along your folds before looking up at you for reassurance. you nodded, desperate written all over your face.
the first thrust in you was insane. the stretch felt like he was ripping up your insides. it was painful, a good type of pain. “fuck you’re so fucking big jay.” jay only groaned. he couldn’t even say anything, this was better than anything he could ever imagine.
once he was fully in he started to move in and out of your core, grabbing your waist, feeling himself in you. the crude sounds coming out of the both of you echoed throughout the house. jay’s hands played with your tits while you grabbed his waist, making sure he stays inside you as much possible.
“shit you’re so tight, that’s pussy’s all mine ain’t it?” his hand left your tits and started rubbing your clit while his thrusts turned very hostile you couldn’t even form words from the immense amount of pleasure.
“yes yes, it’s all your baby.”
jay didn’t think it could get better than this, but it did.
he flipped you over, now on all-fours, back arched. not wasting any time in fucking you from behind. he groped your ass, leaving his hand marks all over them.
you were about to explode when a ring could be heard, more specifically from your phone. you looked over it on the night stand seeing ‘jake’ displayed on the screen. shit you completely forgot that you just left him at the restaurant. you could call him back lat-
“answer it.” jay said from behind you sternly, fucking you even deeper.
“i don’t think i ca-“
“answer the fucking phone, it must be important.” as much as he didn’t like jake, it turned him on the way you could barely breath let alone speak while he’s fucking you restlessly.
you could barely talk but you managed to grab the phone and answer it, trying to sound as normal as possible.
“ sorry jake, i just wasn’t-hmp feeling well.” your hand went over your mouth to stop you from moaning into the phone. jay was just laughing in the background at your state right now.
“yea yea i-i’m so sorry, have f-fun though.” you nodded at his last sentence before hanging up and glaring at jay from behind you.
“fuck you!” you said then slamming your head into the pillow letting out muffled moans.
“i’m quite literally doing that baby.” you rolled your eyes in pleasure and annoyance. your orgasm was very close, even jay could feel the way you clench around him.
“fuck i’m cumming, so fucking close.” your weak voice said .
jay was on the same boat, he would’ve cum way earlier but it just felt so damn good, he wanted to treasure every moment.
“me too baby, c’mon cum all over my dick, do it baby.” that’s exactly what you did. your body twitched at the sudden feeling. your body going limp.
jay was also on edge, with a few more thrust he pulled out of you and came all over your back moaning in the process.
after the two of you balanced your breathing, jay laid next to you caressing your hair, the both of you were just giggling like little kids.
“so this was the gift you were talking about?”
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thehighladywrites · 6 months
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— “it’ll be our little secret, professor”
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☀︎ - pairing: eris vanserra x reader
☀︎ - summary: you hook up with this delicious older man for one fun night to forget your scummy ex, what do you do when the same man turns out to be your new professor?
☀︎ - warnings: smut, oral (m.receiving), hint of degradation, taboo relationships, student x professor, both are obviously old enough, i just want him so bad GOD
☀︎ - amara’s note: this is going to be a series where i’ll post text threads with prof eris, headcanons, just different things. I’m planning this series to be about 10 chapters, but I literally have no structure, I just write. also i hope you like this as much as I do. and if you see any mistakes, no you don’t
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In the corner of the club, everything felt a bit fuzzy. The air was thick with a mix of excitement and different scents. Dim lights created a soft atmosphere, and the distant sounds of the crowd and music blended together. It was like time slowed down, and you were in your own world, just soaking in the low-key vibe of the club corner.
The earlier shots hit you, and now you're in a blissful, relaxed state. All you could focus on were the hands exploring your body, lips locking with yours, and captivating scent surrounding you.
In the heat of the night, you ended up kissing a stranger without a second thought. The risk of being alone with someone unfamiliar did register – you just didn't care. Discovering your boyfriend's cheating after a difficult three-year relationship, marked by numerous breakups and makeups, left you feeling free from a toxic situation.
Now, free from those shackles, you embraced the chance to breathe and have some carefree fun. You had gone out with your friends, planning to originally get black out drunk but you suppose there’s better ways to cope.
Coming up with the idea of harmless fun, you and Elain came up with new identities for everyone to play out. Providing a random name, you spun a fat lie of being an up-and-coming writer, in the middle of writing your latest novel. Falsely claiming to be older, you described a beautiful house situated on the outskirts of Prythian that you owned. It was all part of a lighthearted game, with no harm intended since you believed you'd never cross paths with the guy again. It was ridiculously easy to bag the man since he didn’t tell you anything about himself, only nodding when you talked about yourself.
The attractive stranger had dark copper hair, captivating amber eyes, and stood several inches taller than you. His eyes glistened in mirth mixed with hunger. His muscular build caught your attention, and you found yourself grabbing onto his strong arms.
If his looks didn't captivate you, his mouth certainly did. His wicked tongue unleashed clever comebacks and tantalizing dirty talk that sent shivers down your spine.
The best part? He was older, more mature, more confident and much more good-looking – just so much more than your ex. Comparisons might be wrong, but if you had to choose, the man in front of you was a no-brainer.
Because he wasn't some guy; he was a man who acted like a man, who spoke like a man and touched you like a real fucking man.
The man had been touching and kissing you for what felt like an eternity. You greedily wanted more from him. You didn't want to regret not taking the chance, and almost as if he could sense it, he invited you back to his place.
You nodded, excusing yourself to let your friends know about leaving. Approaching them, you shared your decision to go with him, and Gwyn, Nesta, Em and Elain cheered you on. However, Feyre, always the protective friend, expressed her concern.
“Go get some, but I swear I’ll hunt him down if anything happens, got it? And have your location on.”
Her words, while somewhat playful, held a genuine undertone of worry.
You nodded and promised her you’d be safe before hurriedly made your way outside to the handsome man.
“Still want to come with me, sweet thing?” he asked curiously, making sure it was still something you wanted.
“Mm, yeah, still wanna go. Unless you've changed your mind?” Stepping forward, you grabbed the man's tie, pulling it gently as you looked up at him with half-lidded eyes. A playful glint clouded your gaze as you cocked your head to the side, oozing confidence.
He smirked down at you with a wicked glint, clearly showing his mind was nowhere near changed. The man stepped forward, rubbing his clothed cock against your dress, making you feel his hard on through his pants
“Does it feel like I’ve changed my mind?”
The chemistry you had was unmatched, he was so clever and witty and you wanted to know more about him as he led you to his car, a sleek, black one, indicating money.
You’d blame your forwardness on the alcohol tomorrow when you remembered how you just blurted out the question.
“Hey, you rich or something?” you giggled.
The man opened up the backseat door for you and through the side of his eye gave you an amused smirk.
“Or something.” he teased.
You rolled your eyes, grinning, as you hopped into the backseat, enjoying the warmth of his hands securing your seatbelt and closing the door.
But hold on, the backseat?
Weren't you supposed to sit upfront with him? Before you could ask, he opened the other backseat door and slid in beside you.
Maintaining eye contact, he grinned at your confusion and said, “Alden, please take us home.” A faint "yes sir" was heard, and the car started moving. Shocked, you realized he had a driver – clearly, he was quite wealthy.
You scanned the spacious car, realizing there was more than enough room for the fun activities on your mind. With a screen separating you from the driver, you unbuckled your seatbelt and moved closer, straddling his lap.
His hands instinctively found your hips, guiding your movements over him. Lips on your neck, he left dark marks as your hands ventured lower, reaching his cock, which elicited a groan from him. Your eyes widened as you felt the size of him. The man simply flashed you a subtle smile and raised his eyebrows.
You unbuckled his belt, maintaining eye contact as you carefully watched his face show pleasure as you put your hand down his pants and stroked him. You gave him a few lazy strokes, eventually shuffling off his lap and kneeling infront of him, ready to put your mouth to use.
Time became irrelevant and all that was heard were the sinful, obscene noises mixed with his hisses of pleasure as you sloppily bobbed your head up and down, swirling your tounge around the head, running your finger over the slit.
“Fuck yeah, that’s it. Could use this slutty little mouth forever.” he rasped, hips bucking as his hands went to your hair, slightly pulling on it as you let out a muffled whimper.
Pre cum and spit dripped down your chin, slowly making it’s way to your chest and floor as you pushed your head down further and further, feeling satisfied at his sounds of pleasure.
Once, twice, you grip on the shaft and slap the tip on your tongue before sucking on the sensitive head.
With a quick twitch of his cock, he cums, experiencing euphoria in his buzzed state. He gasps and moans pitifully as his lips twitch between his teeth and his hips buck into your mouth against his better judgement. You pump your hand at the base of his cock where you are unable to fit, swallowing as much of the hot, sticky ropes that coat your mouth as you can. As he pours into you, the walls of your pussy clench around nothing, so badly wishing your were sitting on the cock that was currently on your tongue.
His cum was everywhere - your hair, your face, your tits. He slumped against the seat and moved his eyes down back to you, catching you licking of the sticky residue of your fingers.
Before either of you have a chance to say something, the car slows down to a halt signaling that you’re probably at his place. He tucks himself into his pants and doesn’t buckle them before he opens the door and grabs you, throwing you over his shoulder as you laugh. Your mind forgets about the fact that you’re covered in his cum and just blanks when you take a look at his so called house, a mansion or a fucking estate is more like it.
The lengthy driveway opened up to a stunning front yard adorned with red and orange-leaved trees, an unusual scene for the end of summer. A well-lit, ornate fountain with three tiers stood proudly infront of the house, enhancing the beauty of the surroundings. The massive Victorian mansion, with its beautiful windows and overgrown vines stunned you.
He set you down and held your hand as he led you into his room, and it overmet your expectations. Instead of a dark, edgy space, it was spacious with earthy tones and bathed in soft ambient lighting. The room exuded comfort, making you wish to stay longer. His bed, adorned with a large fluffy comforter and a million pillows, looked inviting.
Various trinkets and figurines adorned the room, but what captured your attention was a massive bookcase showcasing your favorite books. Intrigued, you dropped his hand and made your way over. Your eyes widened at seeing a book from your wishlist, yet to be released. Confused, you asked how he had it, and he explained that Sellyn Drake was an old family friend and had gifted it to him.
You decided to tease him about the book, saying, “You know, I've heard great many things about this book. How about you tell me what it's about? I heard it had some... exciting scenes.”
His eyes met yours, and with a subtle smile, he stepped closer and closer, “How about I show you instead?” The air seemed to thicken with a hint of tension, leaving you curious and captivated by the possibilities that lingered in his suggestion.
——
Your legs trembled as you hastily stood up, determined to make your exit. Having been fucked stupid all night, dawn was approaching, and the new semester was starting tomorrow, leaving you with a load of preparations. You located your dress, bag, and heels, putting the clothes on carefully. Quietly, you ordered a cab to avoid startling the man still asleep. Before leaving, your eyes lingered on his bookshelf. Tiptoeing closer, you took the book you'd eyed the night before and read the teaser on the back. Glancing between him and the book, grabbed it, and silently left his room and house.
——
Feyre, Elain, Nesta, Gwyn and Em, your friends and roomates, practically pulled you across campus to grab your schedule and check out the new students filling the cafeteria. The buzz of excited chatter and the aroma of coffee and sweet pastries filled the air as you scanned the room. After a few moments, you parted ways, each heading to your respective classrooms, the anticipation of a new semester buzzing in the atmosphere.
You wandered through the literature building, searching for classroom LE4, the place where Advanced Literature with Professor Beron awaited. Memories of your first year with him being an absolute ass lingered, so you hoped he'd calmed down over the summer, giving everyone a fucking break.
You finally entered the huge lecture hall and climbed the stairs, opting for a seat at the back, hoping to fly under the radar in case Professor Beron was in a bad mood.
A few rows down, you spotted your ex, Ilias, with a new girl on his lap. His sleazy smile and wandering hands were more icky than anything ever. Reflecting on why you ever went back to him so many times, you turned around, focused on bringing out your notebook and computer from your bag. As the doors opened, the click-clack of quality shoes echoed through the hall, accompanied by girly giggles and voices creating a murmur in the background.
A jolt of surprise froze you, and your heart seemed to pause for a moment as his voice unexpectedly filled the room. All your previous movement ceased, and a sudden hush fell over the surroundings, creating an atmosphere charged with unexpected tension. The shock of hearing someone you hoped thought to see again made time momentarily stand still.
“Hello. I'm Professor Eris, and I'll be taking over this class. My father used to teach it but has passed away, so I'll be filling his shoes. I anticipate a productive year together. If you doubt your ability to keep up with the rapid pace of this advanced class, I suggest you leave now and spare yourself, as well as me, the trouble.”
Panicking, your eyes scanned the room for any possible escape route. There was just no fucking way you could be in this class when your professor had fucked you against his bookshelf, or when you had his dick shoved down your throat. Sinking in your seat, you desperately opened your computer, using it as a shield, praying he wouldn't notice you. The need to escape intensified, but the fear of drawing attention kept you frozen in your seat.
As dread crept in, he pulled out an attendance list. The sinking feeling deepened as he insisted everyone state why they chose the course. Hiding behind your computer, you debated revealing your presence or attempting to stay under the radar.
"Ilias Smith?"
"Emma Wilson?"
"Jess Lennox?"
"Amanda Gomez?"
Each one confidently declared "here" and delved into passionate remarks about Hemingway, Austen, Kerouac, all the authors that made them choose this course or whatever. Your hands started sweating as Professor Eris called your name. When you hesitated, he repeated it louder, his gaze scanning until it locked onto you.
Anticipating an intense reaction, all you saw was a slight narrowing of his eyes.
“Well? Are you here, Y/N L/N?”
You mumbled a faint "yeah," and when he asked why you were there, your words fumbled, “Uh, I suppose because I like books. A huge fan. Yes.”
Your classmates chuckled at your less-than-impressive answers, and you sunk back into your chair, just observing for the rest of the lecture. A few rows ahead, a group of girls giggled, thinking they were discreet as they whispered about Professor Eris. Their discussions about their fantasies sparked a tiny irritation within you.
Like who the hell gossips about someone, so crudely in broad daylight and during a lecture, especially when it's about a professor? It wasn't jealousy, no, no definitely not.
You just found it… super unsettling.
——
After two suffocating hours, you hastily packed your bag, eager to escape. But just as you were about to disappear, your name echoed in the room.
“Miss L/N, do you mind staying behind? There seems to be a problem with your email,” Professor Eris announced, leaning against his desk with his massive arms crossed. He bid the remaining students goodbye and waited until they all left before locking the doors.
The moment those doors clicked shut, the atmosphere in the room shifted dramatically. The tension became so thick you could practically cut it with a knife.
He turned back around and approached you, merely a few inches away, face a mix of amusement and curiosity.
“Hello there, little liar. I certainly didn’t expect to see you here.”
Your cheeks heated and nervousness filled you at the memory of the depraved moments you'd shared, causing your gaze to involuntarily drop to his chest and wander downward, reliving those sensations.
However any nervousness vanished as you remembered that he was the one who came to your university. If anyone should’ve been surprised it should’ve been you. A mischievous smile played on your lips as you toyed with the idea of making his year more challenging. Testing how good of a man he really was became a tempting game.
After all, a man like him wouldn't indulge a student, right?
This could turn into a fun little project to spice up an otherwise dull year.
Lifting your chin up, you looked him square in the eyes as your lips twitched in anticipation.
“I could say the same, Professor Eris. You definitely don’t seem like the lecturer type.”
His eyes narrowed at you, jaw clenching as his intense gaze bore into yours. The intensity made you shift a little, almost causing you to lose some of your confidence.
“Do you think you're funny? I believe you understand the situation here. You lied and now you're here of all places. As my student. Well, this is an unexpected twist. One of us will have to quit and report this,” he stated, injecting a hint of playfulness into his serious tone.
Wait, quit? No, you really didn't want him to leave. This could turn into such a nice little distraction, and there was no way you were losing it now. The thought of him leaving added a layer of urgency to the situation, making you quickly reassess the potential consequences.
“Come on, professor. It doesn't have to be like this. I won't tell anyone. And who says we have to stay away from each other? I mean, what the dean doesn't know won't hurt him, right?” you suggested, a sly smile playing on your lips as you flirted with the idea of bending the rules.
Eris looked you up and down before throwing his head back and letting out a hearty laugh. Your brows furrowed as you twisted your lips, wondering if he was laughing at you. Was he not taking you seriously? Despite the uncertainty, the desire to keep playing this game with him intensified.
Eris seemed to notice your mood turning sour and promptly clamped his lips shut.
“I promise, sweet thing, I'm not laughing at you. I’m just amazed at your boldness.” he assured you with a more serious tone, attempting to dispel any misunderstanding.
“Promise?”
He stepped forward, “Cross my heart and hope to die.”
You both knew that under no circumstances should you be doing this. If anyone caught you, there would be hell to pay. Expulsion and blacklisting from any other Ivy League universities for you, and definitely prison or some sort of pesky law thingy for him.
Yet the mere thought of engaging in something so wrong and secretive made your stomach flip, a mix of thrill and anxiety churning within you.
Looking up through your lashes, you blushed, a deep crimson hue spreading across your cheeks as you once again grabbed his tie and pulled him closer.
“I promise I won't tell anyone, professor. It'll be our little secret,”you whispered, the words laden with a taboo excitement that sent a shiver down your spine.
A wicked gleam flashed in Eris's eyes, and a subtle smirk tugged at the corners of his lips.
“Well then, miss L/N,”he whispered, his voice low and conspiratorial. “Let's see just how well we can keep our little secret.”
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talkdutchtome · 7 months
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Glitch- chapter three
pairing . . . max verstappen x reader / mason mount x reader )
summary . . . when mason mount finds out that his assistant has been harbouring feelings for him for years, he makes it clear he doesn't feel the same way. but once he sees her become closer with formula 1 world champion max verstappen, he realises he may have underestimated his feelings towards the girl he has now pushed into the arms of another )
genre . . . angst )
song . . . glitch- taylor swift )
warning . . . tbd )
series masterlist . . . available here )
a/n . . . it's been a while but chapter three is here, i'm so sorry for how long it took )
Things between Mason and Y/N only seemed to get worse after he found out that she had given her number to Max; to say she was confused about the whole situation would be putting it lightly. Mason had made it clear that he didn’t feel a thing for her, he was furious that she had feelings for him, so why would he have an issue if something happened between her and Max. His attitude was not simply aimed at Y/N either, he was just pissed off at Max. When Max inevitably qualified on pole and Mason had to present him with the pole award, he did so with a face like thunder and an attitude so bad that even the members of staff that had to deal with him clearly saw that something was wrong. And if Y/N thought his mood was bad during qualifying, it was nothing compared to how he acted during the race. 
The group of four were sat watching the race in the Red Bull garage and whilst Y/N, Ben and Reece tried their best to immerse themselves in the excitement of the race; it was hard to do with Mason sat beside them in a brooding silence. His foul mood had extended beyond his interactions with Y/N too; even Ben and Reece, usually recipients of his lively banter, found themselves met with curt responses and icy glares. It was hard to shake off the tension, especially when Mason's frustration seemed palpable. Every attempt at conversation was met with monosyllabic responses or outright silence. 
As the laps passed and the tension escalated, Reece, who could tell just how uncomfortable Y/N was, decided to break the ice. Leaning over to her, he spoke in a hushed tone, "Hey, Y/N, you alright? Mason seems like he's in a mood today." 
She nodded, a small, forced smile playing on her lips. "Yeah, I don't know what's gotten into him. He’s just so angry I don’t know what to do.” 
Reece sighed sympathetically. "He'll come around. Just give him some time." 
But as the race unfolded, tension in the garage reached its peak. When Max secured the victory, the cheers from everyone in the garage were met with a stark contrast from Mason. His jaw clenched, and he rolled his eyes in frustration, clearly annoyed that Max had won, a stark change from usual races where he cheered Red Bull along.  
Y/N exchanged puzzled glances with Ben and Reece, who shared her confusion at Mason's sudden change of allegiance. The atmosphere was palpably strained, and Y/N needed to get away from it all, so she found herself wandering away from the group as they headed towards the podium.  
However, the silence that followed her being away from her friends only spurred her frustration at Masons behavior, and soon she just couldn’t cope without knowing and understanding why he was acting the way he was. So, determined to find some answers, she made her way through the crowded paddock, navigating the sea of people in their vibrant team colors. Spotting Mason engrossed in conversation with Ben and Recce, Y/N hesitated for a moment before steeling herself to confront the issue head-on. 
As she approached, the murmur of their conversation grew more audible, and her heart sank when she overheard Mason's words. "I don't know what Y/N sees in that guy. He's a real prick, and I can't stand him," Mason grumbled to Ben and Recce, his frustration evident. 
Confusion and hurt etched across Y/N's face. She couldn't understand why Mason would harbor such strong feelings towards Max, especially when he had made it abundantly clear that he didn't reciprocate her feelings. Before she could muster the courage to address Mason, Max's voice unexpectedly cut through the tension. 
"Hey, you guys! Great race, huh?" Max approached the group, a wide grin on his face, seemingly oblivious to the undercurrents of tension. Y/N glanced at Mason, who had abruptly shifted his expression into a forced smile. The contrast between his earlier resentment and his current attempt at friendliness was jarring.  
Max’s energy was contagious as he approached the group with a wide grin. 
"I'm throwing a little after-party to celebrate the win. You guys should come.” 
Caught off guard, Y/N's eyes flickered to Mason, who wore a scowl and crossed arms. "We can't, man. We got some stuff lined up," Mason interjected, his tone sharp, making it clear he had no interest in joining the celebration. 
Y/N hesitated, torn between Mason's obvious displeasure and Max's expectant gaze. The unspoken tension in the air was as thick as fog. Max, sensing the underlying dynamics, looked directly at Y/N, seeking confirmation. "You in, Y/N?" 
She bit her lip, glancing at Mason before meeting Max's gaze. "Yeah, sure, I'll be there," she replied tentatively, a slight quiver in her voice. The decision was made, but the uncertainty lingered. 
Mason's scowl deepened, and the air became even heavier. Y/N, sensing the disapproval, fidgeted uncomfortably. She didn't want to escalate the tension, but at the same time, she couldn't let Mason dictate her every move; not when he made it abundantly clear he didn’t even seem to like her as a friend anymore. 
As Max walked away to extend the invitation to others, Mason shot Y/N a stern look. "Really? You're going to his party?" 
Y/N sighed, feeling the weight of the situation. "Mason, it's just a party. It's not a big deal." Reece and Ben exchanged looks, clearly feeling baffled by the scene playing out in front of them. 
Mason, however, wasn't convinced. "I don't get why you're so eager to hang out with him." 
Y/N took a deep breath, trying to find the right words. "Max seems nice, I like him” 
Mason's expression remained hardened, but he didn't press the matter further. Instead choosing to just walk away from her, almost as if he couldn’t even bare to look at her 
In the dimly lit hotel bar, Mason sat slouched on a barstool, nursing a drink between sips. Ben and Reece sat either side of him, exchanging concerned glances as they observed the weight on Mason's shoulders. The earlier anger that had etched lines on his face had given way to a profound sadness, leaving Mason looking like a shadow of his usual self. 
Reece cleared his throat, breaking the heavy silence that hung over the trio. "Mate, you've been quiet all night. Everything alright?" 
Mason took a deep breath, staring into the amber depths of his drink. "I don't know, man. It's just... everything's a mess." 
Ben chimed in, "Is this about Y/N and Max? Look, Mason, it might not be such a bad thing. If they get together, you won't have to worry about her having feelings for you anymore." 
Mason's eyes flickered with a hint of conflict, but he nodded. "Yeah, I know. It's just..." He trailed off, his shoulders slumping. 
Reece leaned in, genuine concern etched on his face. "Spill it, mate. Why are you so bothered that Y/N and Max are getting along? You've made it clear you don't see her that way." 
Mason sighed, his guard momentarily slipping. "It's not about that. I'm worried about Max. He's got a bit of a reputation with women, and I don't want Y/N getting hurt." 
Ben nodded in understanding, but Reece wasn't convinced. "Mate, I've known you for years. Something's not adding up. Are you sure that's all there is to it?" 
Mason hesitated, his eyes betraying a depth of emotion he hadn't intended to reveal. "I just... It's complicated, okay? I don't want to see her get hurt, and I don't want things to get even messier than they already are." 
Ben placed a reassuring hand on Mason's shoulder. "We get it, mate. Just look out for your friend. If you think Max is trouble, it's good that you're keeping an eye out." 
As Mason nodded in agreement, a pang of conflicting emotions welled up within him. In the quiet recesses of his thoughts, he wondered if, perhaps, he wasn't as indifferent to Y/N's feelings as he had convinced himself. 
Meanwhile, the after-party pulsed with vibrant energy as Max and Y/N found themselves in the heart of the celebration. The music thumped in harmony with the beats of their hearts, and the dimly lit venue became a backdrop to a night that seemed to be unfolding like a story. 
The pair, fueled by a mix of adrenaline and a few well-timed drinks, found themselves drawn to each other, their conversation charged with a playful flirtation that danced on the edges of something more. Max's charm and Y/N's quick wit created a dynamic that was both intriguing and infectious. 
As the night progressed, Y/N began to meet more and more of Max’s friends. The atmosphere was filled with laughter and animated chatter as Y/N navigated the introductions, each friend offering a unique glimpse into Max's life beyond the racetrack. The genuine warmth and camaraderie among Max's friends added a layer of connection to the night, making Y/N feel more at home in the bustling celebration. 
Later in the evening, Max and Y/N found a quieter corner of the venue, away from the pulsating beats and the lively crowd. The chemistry between them lingered in the air, and the flirtation that had been bubbling beneath the surface finally came to the forefront. 
Max, his gaze unwavering, leaned in with a playful grin. "You know, you're making it hard to focus on anything but you tonight." 
Y/N chuckled, her cheeks flushed from the mix of excitement and a few drinks. "Is that so? I could say the same about you, Max." 
Their banter continued, creating a bubble of intimacy that shielded them from the surrounding festivities. As the night wore on, Max's friends occasionally joined their conversation, seamlessly weaving Y/N into the fabric of their tight-knit group. 
Amidst the laughter and shared stories, Max's gaze turned more sincere. "You're different, Y/N. I really like being around you. Can I see you again?” 
Y/N, a mix of surprise and contemplation on her face, considered the question. "I'd like that, Max, but I don’t exactly live local, do I?” she said with a chuckle, still slightly taken aback by his forwardness. 
Max nodded, his eyes reflecting determination. "Well, I'm in the UK quite a bit for factory work. It could work out." 
After a moment's pause, Y/N agreed, a smile playing on her lips. "Alright then, yeah. Let me know when you're in town, and we'll take it from there." 
The vibrant energy of the after-party gradually faded as Y/N decided it was time to call it a night. The music softened, and the laughter in the venue became a distant echo as she made her way back to the hotel. Her mind was a whirlwind of thoughts, the events of the night playing out in her head like a movie reel. 
As she entered her hotel room, she noticed a text message from Mason. "Are you back at the hotel?" it read. She sighed, typing a quick "Yes" in response. Truthfully, she couldn’t deal with anymore of Mason’s childish tantrums today, but she just couldn’t find it in herself to ignore him. A few minutes later, there was a knock at her door. Y/N hesitated before opening it, finding Mason standing there, a complicated mix of emotions written across his face. 
She let him in, the tension palpable in the air. Mason's eyes avoided hers as he walked past her and took a seat on her bed, he seemed unable to find the right words. Minutes passed, but Mason remained silent, the awkwardness growing with each passing second. The atmosphere in the room became thick with unspoken words, and Y/N could no longer contain her frustration. 
"What is your problem?" she burst out, her voice a mix of anger and hurt. "First, you completely ice me out, then you get pissed at me for giving my number to Max, and now you've come into my room in the middle of the night and you're just sitting there in silence. What the fuck do you want from me? I'm sorry for how I feel; I know it makes things awkward, but I never expected you to feel the same way or to want me. I just don't understand why it means you have to treat me like shit. You’re supposed to be my best friend." 
Mason, still avoiding eye contact, took a deep breath before finally speaking. "You are my best friend, the person in the world I'm closest to, and I was scared that because of how you feel, we couldn't be friends anymore." 
The raw honesty in his words caught Y/N off guard. She took a step back, studying his face, and saw a vulnerability she hadn't expected. The room fell silent again as they both grappled with the weight of their unspoken feelings. 
Y/N took a deep breath, the intensity of the moment hanging between them. "Mason, you can't just shut me out when things get complicated. We've been through too much for that." 
Mason nodded, the weight of his actions evident in the lines on his face. "I know, and I'm sorry. I should have talked to you instead of pushing you away." 
"Why did you get so upset about Max?" Y/N asked, her voice a mix of curiosity and frustration. 
Mason hesitated, choosing his words carefully. "I guess I was worried. Max has a bit of a reputation, and I didn't want to see you get hurt." 
Y/N's expression softened, understanding the concern beneath Mason's actions. "You could have just told me that instead of treating me like I did something wrong." 
Mason nodded again, acknowledging her point. "I messed up, Y/N, and I'm sorry for that." 
The room fell into a heavy silence as Y/N processed Mason's apology. After a moment, she sighed, a mix of emotions playing across her face. "I appreciate the apology, Mason, but you need to trust me. I can handle my own feelings, and I value our friendship too much to let it be ruined by something like this." 
Mason nodded once more, a genuine sense of regret in his eyes. "I'm sorry for acting out. I don't want to lose you as a friend." 
Y/N felt a sense of closure in his words. "Let's just put this behind us. We can figure things out, but you can't shut me out like that again, okay?" 
As the weight of their conversation lifted, Y/N and Mason found themselves in an uncertain but hopeful truce. Y/N, moved by Mason's apology, decided to bridge the lingering gap between them. She reached out for a hug, an unspoken acknowledgment of forgiveness and a desire to move forward. 
Mason hesitated for a moment before reciprocating, his arms enveloping Y/N in a tentative embrace. The hug was warm, a silent reassurance that their friendship could weather the storms that had momentarily shaken its foundation. Y/N could feel the tension dissipating as they held each other, and for a moment, everything seemed to be okay. 
However, as they lingered in the embrace, Mason's mind was in turmoil. A wave of conflicting emotions swept over him, and an unsettling realization settled in the pit of his stomach. He started to question the nature of his feelings for Y/N, wondering if there was more to their connection than just friendship. 
Internally, Mason panicked. This wasn't a revelation he was prepared for, and the timing seemed utterly inconvenient. He tried his best to maintain the facade of casual friendship during the hug, desperately suppressing any hint of the internal storm raging within him. 
Y/N pulled away, smiling warmly. "Thank you for apologizing, Mason. I really appreciate it." 
Mason managed a tight-lipped smile in return, the internal turmoil hidden behind his eyes. "Yeah, of course. Friends, right?" 
"Friends," Y/N affirmed, her expression one of genuine warmth. 
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