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spookyboywhump · 7 months

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Ai-less Whumptober Day Two- Overworked/Exhaustion

I'm posting day two even if it is late, I enjoyed it hehe. Combined these two kinda cuz Zander is. Going through it. This one mentions @fairieboywhump's Cathal a little bit.

Fandom: Oc's/Original Work

Word Count: 1,676

CW: No violence or injuries but exhaustion, talk of unhealthy eating habits, in general unhealthy habits on Zander's part

***

Zander never knew when to stop. He didn’t know when to rest, when to take a break, when to grab something to eat. Resting felt like wasting time, he didn’t like to allow himself any free time, it just made him feel empty. He didn’t feel that way when he was working, even if he couldn’t work on Cathal’s case at the moment he could still work, he could still help people, as long as he was doing something, it was better than being alone with his thoughts. Besides, the extra pay from all the overtime he did certainly wouldn’t hurt him.

While the extra pay wouldn’t hurt him, his poor habits certainly would, they already were really, but it’s not like he was ready to admit that, even just to himself. He’d been denying it for so long that it took him by surprise when it finally hit him, as he walked down the hallway with Eli, he was talking but Zander could hardly hear him, unable to focus on anything. One moment he’d felt fine, they’d been having a normal conversation, and the next he couldn’t comprehend what he was saying, he felt like the building was swaying, sweat beaded on the back of his neck but at the same time he was hit with a sudden chill. Eli had noticed something was wrong, he was trying to question him but Zander couldn’t respond, he was shaking as he reached his arm out to the wall to find support, having to lean against it entirely.

“Zander? Zander, I need you to answer me.” He said slowly. He looked worried, but he stayed calm, looking over Zander in concern.

“I-I don’t- I don’t feel good…” He finally managed to stammer out. His legs were shaking, he just wanted to sit down, he could hardly think clearly enough to even form a full sentence. There were dark spots in the corner of his vision and his heart was pounding in his chest, he hadn’t passed out in a long time but he was suddenly remembering just how scary it could be.

“Alright, it’s okay.” Eli said gently. “Here, let me help.” Zander allowed him to take his arm, doing his best to support him despite his much smaller size. He was able to quickly pull him into an empty conference room, helping him sit down in a chair at the table. Zander felt like he was going to be sick, he put his head in his hands and just tried to wait it out.

“Thank you- I’m sorry- I don’t- I don’t know what’s wrong, I’m sorry-”

“It’s okay.” Eli told him again. “Stay here, try to catch your breath, I’ll be right back.” He said. Zander nodded, trying to take deep breaths and calm himself down as Eli left the room. Even though he was nearly shivering, he had to shrug his jacket off and roll his sleeves up, overwhelmed by everything happening at once. He put his head down on the table, he just wanted this all to stop.

He didn’t know how long he sat there, it felt like forever, but eventually Eli came back into the room and Zander sat up to face up, feeling so weak he wasn’t sure he could even keep his head up. Eli handed him a cold bottle of water and set some snacks from the vending machines down on the table, a bag of pretzels and his favorite candy bar. He hadn’t expected to get a treat for nearly passing out but he wasn’t going to complain about it. Eli encouraged him to eat, he watcehd over him worriedly like this would fix all his problems. Zander was almost irritated that it did start to make him feel better, just a little bit. It certainly didn’t cure him and restore him to perfect health, he felt like he’d been hit by a rough wave and was left exhausted and shaking, drained of all his energy, but he could think clearer now.

“Is that helping…?” Eli finally asked him, he’d been watching him like he was worried he’d fall unconscious at any second, the way he used to hover over him when he’d suffered a serious injury.

“I guess…” He shrugged. “I don’t… I don’t feel as bad, yeah…”

“Alright, I’m glad.” Eli sighed. “Zander, please, you’re overworking yourself, I really think you need a break.”

“Eli, I swear, I’m fine-”

“You’re not fine.” Eli said bluntly, shutting him down completely. He realized he was struggling to keep himself calm, to keep from lashing out completely. His hands were shaking, but Zander tried not to stare. He could hardly look at Elias directly, so frustrated with himself and the situation it was difficult to really face him. “You can’t keep treating yourself like this. I’m tired, and I can see that obviously, you are too.”

“Fine, fine, I-I’ll go home and get some sleep, okay?” He said, trying to placate him.

“No! I’m- I’m not letting you go back to that apartment, I’m not just leaving you alone!” He insisted. “You’re not sleeping, you’re not eating, you aren’t taking care of yourself at all! The last time I went over there it was a fucking wreck, and normally I wouldn’t give a shit but that- that’s not like you, something is wrong.”

“It’s really not that bad…” He said, trying to calm him down, but he knew Eli was right. He’d been having awful, recurring nightmares that kept him awake, he was hardly motivated to clean up properly or feed himself, nothing outside of work mattered to him. Every second he spent at home just made him more aware that something was missing, he was so lonely and he knew he couldn’t fill that void easily. “I’ll make sure I eat when I get home, and I’ll get some sleep, okay? I’ll even take tomorrow off if that would make you happy.”

“What would make me happy is if you would just let any of us help you.” Eli told him. “You don’t have to do any of this alone, we’re trying to help. You’ll be taking a few days off, and you won’t be going back to your apartment, not right away.” He said it like it was already decided.

“What? Eli, that’s not- I can’t just-”

“I already talked to our manager and she agrees, you need some time off. I know you want to be here and you want to be working but, there isn’t much you can do if you’re hardly even coherent. You’ve been overworking yourself and then driving yourself crazy when you’re alone and it’s- it’s just not good for you!” He told him.

“Then what else am I supposed to do?! That’s where I live, if I’m taking a few days off- which I still don’t agree with, by the way- then at least I should be there to straighten things up, right?”

“No, I’m not leaving you alone.” He insisted again. “I… I asked your mom to come and get you, while I was out. I think you need to go home for a while, it would be good for you to see them.”

“You called my fucking mom on me?” He asked him, looking at him in disbelief. “I’m not a fucking child, I don’t need you to go and tell my parents whenever I act up!” He snapped.

“I’m not trying to get you in trouble, I’m trying to help.” He told him. “You need it, just, trust me, please? It sounded like they really missed you anyways, they’ll be happy to see you.”

“They’re my moms, of course they’ll be happy to see me.” He said, rolling his eyes. Eli looked irritated, but he was doing his best to not get upset with him, and Zander just kept pushing him, almost like he was testing to see when he’d finally snap.

“Zander, we want to help you, we just… you need to accept it.” He insisted.

“You keep saying that but this doesn’t fucking help!” He snapped. “I don’t feel any better, I just feel more stressed, what am I supposed to do while I’m gone?!”

“You’re supposed to take care of yourself. Get some sleep, try to eat more, do something that makes you fucking happy and you might feel better when you come back!” Eli told him. “You are not working alone, I don’t know why you don’t get that. You know we’re still working too, right? Do you trust us?”

“Of course I do!”

“Then go the fuck home, go to bed, and let us do the work!” He told him. “I promise, I will call you if it is absolutely necessary, I won’t keep anything from you, but you need some time off, whether you want it or not. You’ll feel better at the end of it, okay?” Zander hesitated, he really didn’t want to give in but at the same time, he knew there was no winning against Eli in this argument. He could be incredibly stubborn when he wanted to be, and Zander felt like if he kept pushing him he’d either start crying or he’d start screaming at him, maybe both, so he didn’t have much of a choice.

“Alright.” He sighed. “Fine, I’ll go home, I’ll take a few days off, okay?” He told him. Eli relaxed immediately, like he finally let out a breath he’d been holding this whole time.

”Thank you.” He threw his arms around him, leaning down to hug him tightly around his neck. “I know you want to help, I know how much you care, but… I care about you. We’ll do the hard work for you these next few days, okay? You don’t need to worry.” He assured him.

Zander hugged him back, and despite his uncertainty, he felt himself relax. He knew he didn’t have to worry about them, he did trust them, what he didn’t trust was himself to remain calm when the entire situation made him feel absolutely helpless.