https://www.tumblr.com/distort-opia/693230466074132480/top-10-gayest-things-batman-has-uttered-about-the
Literally screaming reading this. Show this to my friend, they don't even ship batjokes but even they acknowledge how gay it is. A part 2 maybe?
Ah yes, I love that post too. Sorry to have taken so long, but here's a Part 2 to "Gayest things Bruce has uttered about or to Joker"!
11) “It's me you want -- it's me you've always wanted. Free her and I'll let you have me. [...] All the bullets in all their guns won't stop me from reaching you... the adrenalin of all the years between us will carry me straight to your throat, Joker... and when the bullets finally bring me down... I'll drag you down with me.”
-- Detective Comics (1937) #532
12) “...but that isn't my mission here. It's him. I'm just as obsessed with him as you are.”
-- Batman (2016) #135
13) “Does he recognize me? Does he know who I am? I may never know. I'm feeling a terrible sense of finality... We've been linked to each other for so long, neither of us truly understanding the bond.”
-- Batman: A Death in the Family (1988)
14) “Don't you understand? I don't want to hurt you. I don't want either of us to end up killing the other. [...] It doesn't have to end like that. I don't know what it was that bent your life out of shape, but who knows? Maybe I've been there too. Maybe I can help. We could work together. I could rehabilitate you. You needn't be out there on the edge anymore. You needn't be alone. We don't have to kill each other.”
-- Batman: The Killing Joke (1988)
15) “Joker, you need to remember who you are, you just need to take my hand, and you'll remember your old life... [...] Joker! Take my hand! [...] We can beat this. Together.”
-- Batman/Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (2019) #1
16) “I was afraid of what he'd do... when I was gone. [...] I wish he were still alive.”
-- Batman: Damned (2018) #3
17) “I made this wretch... I'll have to mind him.”
-- Batman: Lovers and Madmen (2007)
18) “Is he mirroring my broken psyche with his fake smile? Is the Joker... broken too?”
-- Batman (2016) #128 (I Am A Gun)
19) “If I beat you long enough, hard enough... You'll tell me.”
-- Action Comics (1938) #719
20) “I'm trying to figure out what the Joker was doing naked... does he always remove his clothes first?”
-- Detective Comics (2016) #1000
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Take My Hand
This was supposed to be a @flashfictionfridayofficial , but I was a bit late and got my timezones mixed up, and then the word count went over and... well here it is anyway.
Or read it on AO3 here.
Also tagging @tagloveandthunderbirds 'cos ❤️
Fandom: Thunderbirds/Thunderbirds are Go
Word count: 1048
Warnings: feet/shoes
---------------
“You ready to do this, Sweetheart?”
Lucy took her time smoothing down the front of her dress, purposely not looking at the empty dance floor yawning in front of her.
“Are you? You know dancing isn't exactly my forte; a first dance in front of all these people just seems like asking for trouble." She shuffled in her chair. "Are trampled feet covered by the wedding insurance?”
Jeff snickered. “I checked the policy just before I came over here. We’re all set.”
“Okay, if you’re sure. But I’m wearing heels, don't forget; it's going to be like Bambi on Ice out there.”
He shrugged.
“Well I did suggest the hiking boots instead, but you shot me down; something about ‘the aesthetic’. Which looks stunning on you, by the way.”
He stood back to better take her in, grinning appreciatively.
“Last time I make that mistake,” she muttered, waving away the compliment. “Given ‘the aesthetic’ is currently cutting off the circulation to my pinkie toe, respectfully ‘the aesthetic’ can go jump in a lake.”
She mentally cursed the salesperson who’d talked her into putting fashion ahead of comfort.
Concern flashed across Jeff’s handsome face. “Are they really hurting you, honey? We can get you other shoes.”
She smiled up at him reassuringly. “No really, I’m exaggerating …sort of. They just kinda pinch, that's all.”
If she was totally honest with herself, it wasn't even the salesperson’s fault, really. She’d been the one chasing a dream of being perfect and ladylike, even if it was only this once. Dammit, why was dressing up fancy so hard?!
Of course it didn't help that her new husband managed it so effortlessly. He was currently working ‘the aesthetic’ to within an inch of its life, cutting a very dashing figure in his elegant new grey suit and tie, dress shirt and shoes all perfectly matched and filled out perfectly.
Seriously, where did he get off being so good-looking?
She’d just wanted to appear worthy of him, that’s all. Jeff Tracy: ace pilot, hometown hero, handsomest guy in the county and a genuinely good man to boot. He was the prince, and just once she’d wanted to feel like she could be his match - a princess - instead of some awkward, clutzy science nerd who’d somehow managed to win the husband lottery.
She sighed. Clearly that wasn't to be.
There was a pause, then without another word her very handsome husband - God, he really did look good in that suit - knelt down in front of her and took one of her feet gently in his hands. He examined the delicate and uncharacteristically high-heeled white shoe with utmost seriousness, before removing it and flinging it across the room.
“Jeff!”
Lucy felt her face burst into flames as a roomful of eyes turned towards them.
“What? Doesn't that feel better?”
In all fairness it absolutely did. She wiggled her newly-released toes appreciatively even as she fought the urge to hide underneath the table.
“You can't just go throwing shoes around. You’re making a scene.”
He stopped and looked at her, ignoring the rest of the room, then slowly and deliberately reached out and took hold of her other foot.
“I want to enjoy a dance with my beautiful new wife, and if these admittedly pretty little shoes are getting in the way of that…”
The second shoe flew over his shoulder, just missing a nearby waiter.
“...then they’ve gotta go.”
The room was hushed; everyone was looking at them. Part of her wanted to run and hide in the coatroom until they’d all gone, but he was holding her gaze, keeping her steady.
“I don't want anything getting between me and the most amazing, beautiful, perfect person I ever saw, ever again.”
He rose gracefully to his feet and held out his hand to her.
“So how about it? May I have this dance?”
…
It was late spring and the cicadas were singing. Airbase staff were bustling all around, knocking into her, sending papers flying everywhere. She knelt down to pick them up, and suddenly there was a hand in front of her.
“Can I give you a hand, Miss?”
…
It was fall, and the trees around them were every shade of red. They’d talked about everything and nothing, walking side by side, until he stopped and reached out to her.
“Would it be alright if I held your hand?”
…
It was winter and the snow was falling softly. His ice skates made long swooshing noises on the ice around her, while hers clacked noisily as she tried and failed to keep her footing. Another swoosh and then he was there in front of her, hand extended.
“Okay, so not my best idea. How about we go get a hot chocolate instead? My treat?”
…
It was the last days of summer, and the clear water of the lake lapped at her toes. She’d never felt so happy in her life. A perfect day. Beside her she felt him shift nervously, and then he was holding his hand out, a little red box in it, one knee on the ground.
“I’ve got a question I wanna ask…”
…
Her head flooded with the memories of a hundred moments, small and huge, all of them important. A hundred images of him offering his hand, and at last she understood.
He'd reached out for her.
She was the one. And she was worthy, just as she was.
Smiling, she accepted the offered hand.
“Of course you may, Mr Tracy.”
He grinned and bowed. “Why thankyou, Mrs Tracy.”
She rose and he led her, barefoot and spotlit, to the dance floor without a care in the world. Keeping her hand in his, he wrapped his other arm around her waist, enveloping her like a delicate, precious treasure, safe and protected. Their eyes met and he beamed at her like his face was made of actual sunshine.
She grinned back at him.
“You’re sure about that wedding insurance now? Last chance.”
“Don’t you worry about my toes, darlin’. Just keep a hold of me and we’ll do fine.”
And with that the band struck up an old favourite, and hand-in-hand they danced the night away.
Take my hand
Take my whole life too
For I can't help falling in love with you.
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