#(which makes an ass out of u and me)

[non-un-topo]

All it takes is a wee little nightmare to make you too scared to step foot outside for fear of Bad Things happening, like it’s an omen lol

#also it is p o u r i n g outside and it takes me an hour and fifteen minutes to commute to campus #i'm a good little student but sometimes i just can't be assed #esp with all the crazy stuff that's been happening on public transit and on my campus for that matter #i'm just getting a bad vibe today [insert empath meme here] #warning for me complaining about a graphic nightmare!!!!: #had a few stress dreams(?) last night but one particularly violent one in which a woman got run over by a streetcar-- #--and the paramedics were moving people along but i accidentally got a really good look at her and it fucked me up #she looked like she was just sleeping peacefully but i could only really make out the top half of her body #probably because the bottom half was... yeah. #i think i also had another dream that i was being hunted by a sniper?? and they had called my cell and were threatening me + my folks? #and another one where i had to hide some children from... i don't really know what. some dangerous person who wanted to kill all of us #but the kids wouldn't leave me even though i begged them to. #yeah just a normal collection of dreams for me. literally ugh. #i don't even think i'm stressed in my life rn?? #not any more than normal lol

[oceanwithouthermoon]

i think its weird that i have to make this disclaimer but the internet is crazy so wtvr,, anyway,,

if i say i dont like something, that doesnt mean "that thing is bad and nobody should post it.."

i swear literally every time i even mention that i dislike something, people will go "wow does that mean u fucking hate me cuz i post that thing? ur a fucking stupid bitch and all ur opinions r wrong" LIKE ?? er.. no. just because i say i dont like certain characterizations of certain characters (the saiki k fandom is CRAZY about this cuz i can state an opinion on literally any character and a group of people will still go 'well only we're allowed to post our opinions about them because we're always right!1!1!'), or certain ship tropes (mentioned my hatred of toxic yaoi maybe once or twice on here months ago and people STILL get mad at me as if i said toxic yaoi lovers r evil or something), or certain ships, or WHATEVER, does not mean that i HATE the people who are posting them or that i think they shouldnt post them at all, NO, im just posting about my personal tastes on my personal blog and it would be extremely weird and hypocritical if i decided that i was the ONLY person that was allowed to do that,,

i think the only reason people assume that is because there are a lot of other people on here who ARE like that, and a lot of people toe the line between posting that they dont like something and posting that they think everyone who likes that thing is stupid, annoying, and wrong,, so i guess all i can say is, sorry for whatever made you make these assumptions but they arent true about me so plz leave me alone ʘ‿ʘ ur doing the same thing to me that ur accusing me of but i didnt do it in the first place so ur just actively being a dick for no reason

#crazy that the mindset some people on here have is that theyre the only ones allowed to post their opinions #ive repeated this a lot on this blog but i rlly think people forget that the person on the other side of the screen is in fact a person #if ur harassing people and publicly making fun of them then ur just as bad as any real life bully #that shit isnt as funny or harmless as u like to pretend it is #not once have i ever targetted anyone or went on someones blog to harass them over my opinion #yet people think its fine to do the same to me and treat it as if its like. revenge or something #like ? me saying 'i dont like toxic yaoi' is not equivalent to someone going on someone elses page and going 'how tf do u like toxic yaoi' #I DONT CARE !! all ive ever done is sit in my own little bubble and had opinions and that makes people mad #honestly though the people who will publicly talk and post abt it are significantly meaner #and i want to act like im not bothered by it because i know most of them r just angry that someone has a different opinion #and they want all their followers to bandwagon off of them (idk why maybe for validation or whatever-same reasons anyone would bully) #but seriously if u actually do think that something i said was out of line and crossed thise boundaries- just fucking tell me ? #im a person bro. ur solution to disagreeing with me shouldnt be 'lol im gonna post abt this and make everyone harass them' #have a conversation with me dude i dont bite ? if u cant talk to me like a person then just dont fucking say anything wtf #its so cowardly to be like 'well no i didnt wanna say anything to u cuz i didnt wanna be rude.. so instead i publicly made fun of u!' #LIKE WHATTTT STOPPPPP </3333 #ok anyway this post wasnt supposed to get THAT serious. #MY POINT IS just be considerate of other people and dont base ur hatred off of assumptions #ur deflecting the blame onto someone else because u dont want to admit that ur just a fucking bully lol #being inconsiderate on here is something ive also been guilty of back when i first joined the fandom and was clueless #but grown ass adults who have been on here way longer r still doing that shit which is crazy #and i cant say anything because they have so much leverage over me and idk if its on purpose or if they dont even realize #ok im putting fandom tags cuz i want people to see this sorry. this is my one post thats actually targetted but its at a lot of people #so if u look at this and think 'hey i do that' pls evaluate urself<3 #i mean its also targetted at everyone who does this anonomously so i dont know who it is OKOK IM DONE BYE SORRY HOPE THIS IS UNDERSTANDABLE #watch nobody read this fr #saiki k #tdlosk #the disastrous life of saiki k. #meows post

[nyxi-pixie]

me when im supposed to be studying but instead im thinking abt mori and dazai again

let me go absolutely insane for a second (not a second. this is so long. i just checked mfer its over 2000 words. i need to be sedated. imprisoned. restrained. examined. smthn)

'a young man with a death wish once came to me and i wanted to rescue him but i couldnt' and like yeah. beast mori couldnt rescue him. but to a certain extent, canon mori sort of has (touch wood for long term but as it is, dazai is so much less intent on dying than he was in dark era).

and it just. i always wonder about the actual intentions of the mimic situation. because on the surface, it looks like what dazai calls it, then deeper than that, it looks like a very calculated long term strategy, and deeper than that, its just. kinda sad.

i just think its interesting that he plans the mimic thing the way he does knowing dazai will leave despite the fact that he doesnt want him to. and dazai himself reasons this as mori being afraid of him, that mori doesnt want dazai to kill him the way mori killed the old boss. but thats? not true? mori seems unbothered at worst and downright proud at best when he tells oda that dazai will probably kill him one day.

so. Why. did he do it knowing dazai would leave? it wasnt his only option; he could have set skk on mimic. like 5 second future vision isnt gonna do much when the danger is alr there (as oda says). and in the face of a massive black hole coming right at u or a building being dropped on you, five seconds really isnt gonna do much. so mimic cld have been removed without a casualty and the mafia could still have got the permit, and not lost dazai. (who is Objectively an asset to the organisation.) But thats not how it happens. Mori plans it exactly as he does knowing oda will die and dazai will leave. he also then makes it continually obvious that dazai would be welcomed back.

and ive been trying to think of other reasons for it, but across canon and insight from beast mori the only thing i can think of comes back to the fact that mori wants dazai alive. alive and aware that the pm is the best place for him, but alive more than anything else.

i think he wants dazai as his heir bc he knows dazai is enough like him to manage it, but i wonder if it also comes back to the fact that mori is trying to rescue him, and i imagine his own reason to live (and lord knows he suggests he needs a strong one in fifteen) is probably tied down to legacy and responsibility for the city. mori devotes his life to the mafia because he wants peace and appreciates that control (rather than eradication) of the worst of yokohama is the way to keep that peace. and thats enough of a reason to live for him. but it isnt for dazai.

dazai doesnt give a fuck about the mafia as a concept bc his motivations dont rest on ideals the way moris do. dazai only ever does anything because of the people he cares about. everything we see him do, EVEN in pm era where people claim he was some emotionless rockman, come back to his friends.

its why hes never at the centre of the plot. he cant be, because he never does anything for himself. fifteen, in which he is a titular character, is a plot that rests vastly on chuuyas back story. dazais original motivation prior to meeting him is just to khs, and only upon meeting chuuya and them having their whole weird Thing and dazai deciding to be an obsessive freak, does he actually have personal stakes in the job. then in stormbringer, its all abt chuuya again, and dazai is only involved bc he cares about him (whatever he actually says aside). tdipud is driven by odas storyline, and so is dark era. dazai is only active in them bc he cares abt oda.

even when he has more idealistic motivations come canon era, they come back to the fact that hes doing it for oda. anything Above And Beyond that promise is bc hes acting to save the agency, who are his Friends. his motivations are deeply personal in complete contrast to moris, and it is perhaps the only place they really differ.

now ironically, it seems to be that the only decisions mori makes influenced by personal feelings are because of dazai. which takes me to the fact that i think he let dazai leave because he recognises thats whats best for him (at least in the short term - and we'll get to That in a second). and its not really a loss for the organisation because dazais too practical to ever dismiss the mafia, and he still gut responds with their methods. so its an easy sacrifice, a justifiable one.

then theres the contrast with the kouyou&kyouka thing. kouyou doesnt want kyouka to taste the light only to have it sour on her tongue when she realises she cant actually have it because of what she is. because kouyou believes anyone tainted by darkness the way they are can never be free of it. (because she couldnt get out herself).

i wouldnt be surprised if mori thinks the same way, certainly in regards to someone like dazai who Is naturally built for the mafia in a way kyouka really isnt. mori at least believes dazais blood is mafia black and whether or not this is true is irrelevant. he Does have to actively fight his impulses in order to do the Right Thing even now. And even doing that, he still falls into their methods when its practical, or when he's paranoid or unsettled enough to need the comfort of habit, hence the way he treats aku even four years removed from the mafia. hence the way he treats atsushi immediately after Q appears (the way he so instantly latches onto his older self literally slapping the self pity he detests in himself and in his former kouhai out of his current one). hence the way the parallels to mori spring up most when dazai has just been shaken by something.

so i wonder if mori let dazai walk into the light knowing (or believing) he wouldnt fit there, and would come back with a stronger commitment to the mafia as a whole because it may be a concept of sorts, but its one that embraces him in a way the light doesnt, and while dazai does things for the people He cares about, its a mutual thing - he feels responsibility for the people that care about Him too (which probably ties in to the desire for a quiet suicide without bothering anyone, and also to the disgust he has w the sheep - because it Isnt a mutual exchange there).

i think it was always intended as a temporary thing (five years away from the mafia maybe. the 'five years' right before dazai comes to take moris place). give him a taste of the light and let him come to his own conclusion that he doesnt belong there, and eventually turn back to the mafia where he does belong.

(despite suggestions that dazai Doesnt really belong there - smthn smthn cat/dog symbolism - though people suggest this implies he belongs w the ada and i dont think thats true either esp given the way hes omitted from the group so often. i think the cat symbolism w dazai likens him more to natsume than atsushi&fukuzawa esp given the way theyre shown tgthr so often. dazai doesnt belong to any organisation or rigid group, he just fits in line w whoever he cares abt and wherever he decides hes content to stay. v much like a cat actually.).

anyway, moris idea seems to be that dazai wld realise the mafia is somewhere he is cared for, and he cares for the people within it in return. though it doesnt seem to have really turned out that way (maybe mori j underestimated the power of the ada's one specialty: forced integration into its found family. lmao)

so you could see it from a practical perspective: mori sending dazai out to show him he really belongs w the mafia and shld come back to them when the time is right, thus mori secures his legacy by leaving the pm to dazai and the mafia is led forward by someone who could handle it the way mori has.

but. hes never pushy abt dazai coming back. hes downright polite abt it (contrasting to the way he treats yosano), and he puts an awful lot of effort into saving dazais life. (kinda funny that he sends chuuya to pick dazais ass up every five seconds with no reward for either of them - chuuya post dead apple literally asks and moris just like ? uh the safety of the city?? bragging rights😁👍? - but when he sends chuuya to save the agency as a whole the price is Heavy like. exchange of a member is crazyyy.)

dazai is always very much considered One Of Their Own. his seat is still empty waiting for him to come back, he and mori post guild are Always cooperating (despite the kinda petty way dazai talks to him during the reunion - the whole 'i burnt the coat' thing - its almost childish, spiteful in a way that speaks to personal hurt that undermines any control he might have had of their kind of distant passive aggressive exchange. but. im too insane abt that interaction that my interpretation cld be entirely bs.)

they communicate through this ridiculous game of chess, and rely on each other to keep both their organisations afloat. when anyone else from the ada tries to pull the same thing, mori pulls out contracts for their damn souls but when its dazai hes just like ? oh ur bf needs to save you again? of course i can spare him to go pick you up from european prison yeah not a problem! ill even glue his vampire cosplay teeth in!!

in connection with that, even with dazais commitment to Doing The Right Thing, he does not do it in the right way. hes perfectly content to use mori-typical underhanded methods to get the ada to the right place. he sends aku To His Death Knowingly for the sake of saving atsushi and by extension the rest of the agency (and he may have known that the vampirism wld sorta bring him back?? but he still sends him to die), and its sorta similar to mori sending aku out to deal with hawthorne and mitchell while hes in rlly bad shape.

anyway dazais methods always make me think of that cunty exchange sskk have in dead apple 'thats not the way we do things in the detective agency' 'was that a bad joke😘 ur too much weretiger🌈✨💖'. but like. dazai Doesnt work the way the ada does. at least not when things get tense enough to drive him back to habit.

i think people like to interpret dazai as being a better person now, and i think in some ways he is. because hes always influenced by the people hes around most. but also, his motivations havent really changed from pm era. he still does what he does for his friends, they just happen to be on the right side now.

anyway. mori puts more work into keeping dazai alive than any other character (bar perhaps chuuya - but thats because mori saving dazai runs hand in hand with chuuya doing it given hes the one sending him) which is. aurgh.

mori and the wish to save people is just interesting in general. the fact that he became a doctor in the first place is telling on its own plus the unhinged way he deals with yosano - of course someone obsessed with saving people would want a cheat card for sending Death packing - but maybe i could believe it was just a power thing, more to his sense of control. playing with life and death so that he can play god. and i think that probably is just a little bit part of it, esp during the war.

but theres also the way he treats doctors within the pm (sb calls it respect for his former position but it may also be knowledge that the better treated they are the more people they will save). And the only reason he works w the tripartite agreement is bc he loves yokohama, wants its people, including its underground, alive and all that (honestly it probably links back to war stuff - hes really intent on peace).

so hes already someone that is intent on saving people (and beast mori makes this obvious w the way he treats atsushi) but theres a personal edge to it w dazai, possibly bc dazai is so much like him, and asgr is kind of obsessed w the saving your mirrors bc you cldnt save yourself thing (atsushi. lucy. chuuya with his clone. beast akutagawa siblings. beast atsushi&kyouka. i could continue).

im frothing at the mouth but basically, mori does everything for practical reasons in line with his ideals, his grand vision for the PM, but that doesnt mean he isnt making any emotionally charged decisions. its just that theyre always justified by their practical outcomes. (Especially where dazai is concerned). so he can pretend that theyre not driven by personal feelings but IM WATCHING U MORI U CANT HIDE FROM ME.

yk i sometimes wonder if i see him too sympathetically for a guy thats as so sucks as he is but someone has to counterbalance the 75% of the fandom that thinks hes pure evil for no reason and has no thoughts outside of Being Terrible so. here you go have this from the depths of my brain.

#i appreciate most of this sounds completely unhinged u just have to roll with it #god the fact that dazai rlly doesnt. know. at all. makes me insane #he knows moris reluctant to let him die obviously bc he trusts him to save his ass all the time but the extent of it is lost on him #he knows everything and yet he thinks mori forced him out if the mafia bc he was scared of him #meanwhile real image of mori talking abt dazai killing him one day:🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩👍👍👍👍👍👍👍 #im sorry guys im actually not normal about them #i think abt mori&dazai more than i think abt skk. which is. completely bizarre for me #i dont think ive ever given more attention to a non romantic duo before bc im so ship brained but. lord. #dazai osamu #mori ougai #bsd #bungou stray dogs

[belleandsaintsebastian]

most of the time i really don't care but. today i'm feeling a bit sad that i don't think i'll ever be able to tell my dad i'm queer. and i know it's literally so stupid to think about and its not that bad or anything but just. gahhh idk. i'm just a bit angry and sad bc i feel like it would change everything + i'd just let him down. GAHHHHH :) okay anyways back to the main program....

#actually going 2 overshare a little bit more sorry..... #(<- tumblr user ass thing to say..) #okay like. last year when i was just abt to move out for uni for the first time ever. he wouldnt stop going on abt #how i needed to shave my legs. like he wouldnt stop he kept going on abt how everyone would laugh at me + how i needed to do it #implied that it grossed him out or smth. like he tried to bribe #me??? to shave my legs at one point???? which was. i mean it was kind of funny + also i was so devastated hahaha #like top ten things 2 tell your eighteen year old daughter the month before shes about to leave home... #can't WAIT until i enter my late 20s and he inevitably starts asking me why i dont have a boyfriend etc etc :))) #but yeah it's so like. i love him and i wish i could tell him all abt me #and it makes me really sad that i cant do that anymore. like i used to tell him everything. idk its all different now :( #anyways oopsies so sorry for the oversharing dump umm hello i love u + youve done more for me than youll ever know seriously xx

[roseband]

sammy once again showing why the thirst tweets were too tame for them

#the rose #the rose kia forum livestream q&a #kim woosung #lee hajoon #park dojoon #lee jaehyeong #*gifs #*the rose #ceohan #me who's played tenor for 16 years 👀👀👀👀 #also you DO NOT want to get blown like a saxophone (or any single reed my dude) #they get BITTEN..... <3 like.... they make teeth guards that are little rubber stickers so your top teeth don't #wear out sax/clarinet mouthpieces #soooo on mar 10th when they give me my vvvip uke and sign it #and talk to me and ask me the same basic ass ''do u play an instrument'' q they've asked every other person w/ vvvip #(which i KNOW i'm going to be incredibly unhinged about btw) #i may tell that man... ''clarinet and saxophone for almost two decades (and also you bite reed instruments a lil with ur upper teeth fyi)'' #((this was my most HATED joke in middle school lol))

[b4kuch1n]

damn in the absolute worst case scenario (unlikely) I'm also on cohost now (@/b4kuch1n if the link don't work). otherwise I'm baku_of_healthy on ig and still @/B4KUCH1N on twitter. but they will, in fact, have to surgically remove me from the walls of this site if they want me to pack it in before it literally vanishes from thin air

anyways

#bakuspeech #pattern for this thing by boigameista ! #I'm trying to sew a zipper onto its ass so it can be peeled. bc this is a gift for a baby #and I want it to be easy to wash #mm. I really do need to get my ass in gear and make a portfolio page huh #I'll look into neocities rn. figure something out at least temporarily #you know what I am chuffed tho. that I got a pink fabric for the innard of this thing. its so gross looking #which appeases something in me. naked mole rat in a frog costume #but for now. I sleep #have a good night lads. u can hang out with this thing its ok

[crimeronan]

I've been thinking about Vee and Hunter again and got curious - what is your hc for what will happen if she starts sucking the magic out of Hunter?

there are two possible answers that came to me, both of which i find equally funny.

one is that she just slurps him like a capri sun. delicious

the other is that hunter channels ambient surrounding magic thru his galdorstone. so he's like an all-you-can-eat buffet of constantly-replenishing power. except potentially with the side effect of sucking up the world around him like a capri sun.

i'm sure other people who are more involved in toh's worldbuilding have put a lot more thought into this than i have. it's interesting for sure!

#she did nearly rip belos's ass out of him in TTT without seeming to worry that it would hurt him #which makes me think draining him doesn't have the same effect that it does on witches with bile sacs. u know #funniest and cutest headcanon would be if vee snacking on him like a vampire just puts him to really good sleep #nightly ritual: vee has a warm meal before bed and all of hunter's restless energy goes away so he can just curl up and snz. #perfect for both of them. #replies #toh #vee noceda #hunter toh #as for how this would go if they met in the princess AU. i have no idea.

[toxooz]

omg i literally love wheelbitten as a comic and ur art is amazing

random question but how long have u been drawing as an artist and do u have advice.............

thank uuuu and I've been drawin my ass off since I could hold a pencil and I'm 24 (25 next month) now so this shit wasn't overnight by any means lmfao idk the way i did it was have A Thing that you like drawing and just draw the fuck outa it and eventually you'll get better for sure whether it be the desire to get better at drawing said thing makes you do research and study something to become better at it or just literal muscle memory from drawing said thing so much. I had lil spouts of taking time to get better at specific things like anatomy, shading, ect. by studying it but overall i just subconsciously got better by mentally picking up new things everytime i draw and analyzing the world around me. Even recently i got to see that with drawing tactical gear (that ive never really drawn before and never wanted to draw in my life) soley bc i just REALLY fukkin love Ghost and Konig

i went from being terrified and intimidated of drawing tactical gear (even trying to put a gun in front of it as if that was any better lmfao) it used to be vague as hell and my brain would shut down just trying to look at the references(i remember having a ''shit man am i even gunna be able to draw these characters???'' moment of dread the first time i was drawing Konig pffft) to absolutely loving drawing tactical gear and seeing how much more detailed i can make it with every new drawing, so a complete 180 but that's bc im just totally obsessed with the characters and drawing is how i express that sO thats mainly what i mean by just have a thing that you love and want to draw and the rest should follow with time, patience, and practice. I think it's about training your brain and motivation to pick up on details or a certain way something looks in lighting (or lack thereof) bc my brain is probably wired a certain way after art being like a centerpiece of my development to the point to where drawing is just What I Do and at this point if i dont draw for even a few days i start getting vaguely antsy and fidgety it's crazy lmfao SO idk if this is worded like i need it to but yeah art and the act of drawing can be frustrating as hell but it should be enjoyable and rewarding above all else at the end of the day!

#i drew bc the piece of shit im unfortunately biologically related to drew a lot when we were kids so id just copy her #then i drew winged wolves and dragons and the occasional horse for like 7 years then The Axel obsession started #where i drew axel from kindom hearts literally all the time and had 870000 aus for him where i would draw for all of them #when i tell you the obsession for him was catastrophic u best believe but it kept me drawing like a motherfucker until i made my monster oc #which was around the age of 15 is when i started consistently drawing humanoids #OH YEAH i had a whole lion king phase too in 2011 where i would strictly draw lions all the time and my first record of drawing online was #on the lion king fanart archive (which i still visit to look back its like visiting an old janky friend:') ) #but yeah then my heart was stolen by my ocs and all the potential designs i could make them #and thats where i am now aside from the festering COD masked men obsession boiling over in the corner AHA #so basically latch onto an obsession and pick up that damn pencil #even as a kid if i liked anything the immediate connection was trying to draw it #didnt matter how weird to draw or undrawable it was my ass would be in that notebook bc its the only way i know how to express myself lmfao #this is long as fuck but NOW im out peace skskksk

[captainsjack]

every time an author mentions ethan’s supposed military background i immediately have to close out of the fic. girl ethan hunt would not touch the us military with a mile long pole. clearly you never sat for hours on you basement floor on cold ass tile straining your neck up to look at the tv & click through all of the characters’ background files on the mi1 dvd special features . u don’t KNOW him

#ethan hunt?? a military man?? girl on what planet #he has so much distaste for the us gov let alone any form of authority he wouldn’t have SURVIVED #he’d have quit or been fired within the first week if he even dared to enlist (which he wouldn’t have) #the only reason he’s in the imf is bc he knows what they do is GOOD and he has to work around all the stupid ass gov officials #and when he knows it’s not?? he doesn’t do it!!! he rebels! #man break protocol & is a bitch to authority every 5 minutes #he’s a low class farm boy theater nerd u can’t IGNORE THAT #i’m just saying people that only got into the series post gp aren’t the same….. unfortunately #also the fault of gp producers to let out another file background for the team?? like girl do your research it’s already been decided #-disclaimer- before anyone gets mad i’m not actually hating anyone other than whoever made the gp background files #but i WILL refuse to read any military!ethan fics or posts #anyways #contradictory info in series makes me so mad like how’d you let that happen #mission impossible #ethan hunt #*

[lemongogo]

hi

#yall ths art block is so bad its actually making me so stressed out😭😭😭 #its been awful plenty of times before BUT THISSS???IT FEELS NEVER ENDINGGG #so fucking frustrating-__- and i was finally working on smth i had started to like yday #but i hit this mid point where i didnt know How 2 break thru from like .. rough > finished #and im like T__T . brah . head in my hands #IDK WHAT TO DOOOOOOO . < lamenting . < woe is me . #sry i luv talking abt it . its therapeutic tbh . what do u guys do when u are in this position #i also try to go back to basics and j do gesture studies until i feel more capable #but im like shakig the bars of my cage . let me do smt fun again. please ❤️ PLEASEE ❤️ #i think part of it is also imposter syndrome whre like .. u see so many people u look up to doing so many cool things w their art #and its like . falling back into the trap of comparison and feeling like nothing u make can replicate the feeling of seeing those other #things ykwim�� #sick in da head . i think its also a twt issue #like ever since i started posting on there ive been feeling like i have 2 make . quote unquote good things which . obviously dookie sentimen #bc any art is objectively good art there isnt like . U CANT BE BAD YKWIM HELP #but when i j posted to tumblr it was like . u send it off like slapping a horse on the ass and u see it ride away and its so lowkey #and fun.. the community here is so muchc fun .. j dont feel pressured here #smiles sweetly #<gi influence #maybe ill delete the app 4 a while until i feel normal again #guys we need to kill all social media #guys we need to go back to drawing sheep on rocks (<giotto ref( #if i had 2 elaborate ig it feels like . i am following the path of most resistance -__- like wading hesdstrong in2 waves that keep pushing #me back . theres so much i want to do Wish i could do but its like damn i can barely draw like two complete things over the course of 2-3 mo #from how HARD IT ISSS🚶and my aphantasia compounds it . fumbling arnd in a dark room hoping smth sticks #graa.. i think its the realization that i couldnt ever do art professionally bc im such an obstinate artist T_T #tbh saying all this now its like looking up in2 the eyes of all my art insecurities looming over me #CASTING 100 FT SHADOWWWW🧍 #whteve . check back on me in 2 months hopefully i feel normal ab it then

[skyburger]

venn diagram of these guys

#oh this is not the point but im realizing i accidentally picked pictures where theyre all facing one wat except dio. FUCK!!! #jjba #professor layton #dmc #mgs #<- im sorry for putting tags on btw its mostly for the filtering purposes #muffin mumbles #anyway im not saying theyre all the exact same because they're absolutely not. Ohhh they are NOT the same #but their similarities and differences are so fun to compare and contrast u know #like. do you get it. descole is like dio and dio is like liquid and liquid is liks vergil and vergil is like descole #but also they havs common threads between all of them i think #Off topic but it does bother me that they all have really light hair except for descole. however i couldnt change any of their hair colors #that would be fucked up and evil. can you imaging brunette vergil. blonde descole. Exactly #anyway sorry for getting pictures i actually like of the first three and then just cropping snavid out of the shit twins image #for the last one LOL #maybe i will make a venn diagram of these guys one day. we will see... #i mesn i Would do it. ive tried. but the hardest part to me is formatting the fucking circles bro #i use a site to generate it and it looks like shit. i do it by hand and it looks like shit. i edit it from a template... u get the idea #but like i need you to listen to me i am speaking directly into your ear. i need you to think about v & desmond sycamore. pls do this for me #ok thats it i think im outta stuff to say rn amen 🙏🙏🙏 #edit literally 20 hours later: my stupid ass trying to put a 172x172 image next to the three other 500x500 ones and not realizing #its ok though i just fixed it #ifyou want the old version (?) its in the reblogs twice; i rbed it just now saying id fix it + someone else rbed it #which is why i clicked on it cause i saw it in my notifs #thank u to themrmoki you did me a solid <3

[cloudcountry]

i love how i come back to twst post about how much i hate idia for a few days and then leave again it's such a cycle

#auburn's rambles <3 #i think about that time when people were shipping me w him a lot #and i don't think i ever really addressed how bad it made me feel #like i told people to stop yeah but now whenever i see idia i think about how upset and frustrated i was #like it keeps coming BACK i can't get it out of my HEAD #THIS GOT KINDA VENTISH WAIT #idk man it's late i should be asleep but Fuck i cannot stop thinking about how that got so out of hand #my poor lab partner had to deal w me that day LMAO i like. cried in front of her #and i don't know why my brain keeps coming back to it because nobody makes jokes like that anymore #and everyone who did sent me apologies which was so sweet #anyways hello ygys i think i just needed to get this off my chest goodnight #FOR CLARIFICATION I AM OK!!!! i think im just emotional rn and i did not expect to dump a whole ass essay here #muah muah love ygys thank u for being on my side i hope all of your pillows are cold and you have sweet dreams

[vegaseatsass]

I watched THC ep3 this morning and planned to make a playful post about Pond personally sending home my fave IN THE FIRST ROUND and thus my no longer being a Pond defender, but there's actual major legal shit happening today so it feels in bad taste

so I'll just say that I actually think it's really cool that THC acknowledges and explores the production involvement in elimination, a thing every competitive reality show I've seen in my life keeps strictly hidden from view. Even if Pond was WRONG and Sammon was RIGHT!!!

#the hidden character #the hidden character spoilers #tbf pond was like 'being ambitious and not crying about your irl is prob a strength in other companies' #'we just like boys who cry openly and easily here at BOC' #which is to me a hilarious thing to reveal your company actively looks for #professional ambitious beautiful interesting fierce? ok sure but do you CRY #but he got some great-ass performances out of first time actors with this logic so who am i to argue #i just wanted to get to see spoiler's hidden story like we didn't even get to LEARN the things that might make him vulnerable :'( #i was already intrigued by the like 'my family is very loving but there's no chance in hell any of us will openly say ily' lol #every other boy: mommmmm i'm so tired :( can u comfort me #him: i just want to talk to you since i miss you and i know i can't make you say you love me haha hi mom!

[anotherpapercut]

sorry if this is extraordinarily pretentious but I do think it's wild that lobe piercings count as piercings in the same way a lip piercing does. it feels wrong. I have never thought of ear piercings as real piercings it seems like you should just be born with those right like they should be just in there naturally

#i have had my lobes pierced 3 times so like i have 6 extra holes in my ears but theyre closed and if they werent i dont think id count them #because its just a lobe piercing? if you can get it as a whole ass baby it doesnt count to me jfksvsjsbdbd SORRY if this is mean its just #its SO normie. which isnt a bad thing just in my mind that makes it not count sjbsjsbs #just like if i say i have 3 piercings and I'm talking about on my actual face and then someones like oh i have 2 and its just their lobes #im gonna be like hm ok #anyway umm this is all to say that I'm sorry but if you have no facial piercings at all i am always going to think youre boring #and i dont mean that in a mean way. we need boring people to make the rest of us look cool #just funny to me when people are like oh no facial piercings seem so risky and scawy like have u seen an 80 yr old womans lobe piercings #those mfs may as well have been stretched for gauges. also ear piercings seem to get infected more ime #also ive seen people have their earrings fully ripped out but never a facial piercing unfortunately #also i can't think of anything more metal than that lmfao. that sounds gross and painful but sick as FUCK

[bombusbombus]

recoloured this old warmup to repost cause I had it on my mind.

If Clark is going to be in earth 19 (gotham by gaslight universe) (they're publishing more gbg and clark is going to be there), then listen to me listen to me, he needs to be a cowboy. Superman needs to be a cowboy in the big city. I am SOO serious about this. I am on my knees, DC, let me write for you, I would add so many themes about modern technology versus traditional knowledge and sprinkle in some anticolonialism PLEASE.

You could have a cute little Daily Planet that has to struggle against yellow journalism in a smoky little backroom & setting their own type, a la The Truth. You could have gentlemen's clubs. You could have a brutal war against unions in the streets and one lone titan of industry giving into their demands. You could have the exact same 3 batkids from the movie, there's literally nothing to improve on there. You could have Clark tear down a barbed wire fence with his bare hands, in a futile attempt to unravel colonialist ideas of private land ownership. Imagine the alien knows more about the earth, the real earth, than the knight in his city does. Imagine the American dream failing Clark, who has to go back east to the big city, failing Bruce, who lost his parents, failing everyone over and over until they decide to build something without it. In an era of rampant exploitation, what do real heroes look like?

Or you can make the justice league fight big steampunk robots ig I'm excited either way.

#all that to say ask me about the gotham by gaslight superbat friendship I've been thinking about for a LITERAL YEAR... #the original colouring on this was only the sort of ass you can achieve with a blue light filter at 2am #also I can hear you saying “why do your warmups usually look better than your final drawings Moose?” #(shh let me imagine I have a huge rapt audience) #well. I have aphantasia which makes it much harder to make things up than to draw from life #however my passion is cartooning. so I'm a little fucked #I also have a disability that sometimes makes me run a temperature when I overexert myself mentally #so drawing cartoons can make me run a literal fever #whereas drawing from life is more abt hand skill than brain skill so it doesn't fuck me up #but that's why I don't draw much anymore lol. Arranging people and items and background on a canvas is excruciating trial and error #but when you already have a pic the photographer has done some of that for you and you just need to collage preexisting images together #and once you have the elements of the picture then it's easy to retroactively construct a balanced tableau #tl:dr creativity is hard and makes CPU explode but editing is easy #that being said if a mutual wants me to draw an animal or something for them & gives me a reference I will drop everything to do it. dm me. #seriously I'm good w anything organic like plants or animals or horrible growths #hell if u do thumbnails I'll draw the full thing. I'll write w you. I fuckin love collaboration. #might be a bad writing partner though cause I'm neurotic as hell #. #I just remembered that Dan Garret was in earth 19 last time it was shown in a comic #no offense to all you dan-heads out there. but I think he should die. #cause I would be. obsessed. With 1890s Chicago cryptid Ted Kord #I think he should be 23 and terrible #the most steampunk guy around. Probably takes cocaine. Still a college student (gettin his fourth degree). Hasn't left his house in a month #not to mention futureboy Booster in his kevlar vest with his iphone named skeets

[gncrezan]

buttonkenzie vs. the chicago subway

#warmup for school that spiralled <3 #kent zarneki #laila wiseman #mind blind #both of whom i miss very much . so i drew them in outfits i think they deserve #one thing u must understand about me is that i firmly believe in kenzie wearing dresses #and that i also believe in the gnc capabilities of gender variable ROs. so there #my art #ignore very kindly the half assed background. i have this vivid in my mind and drew a sketch like this some time ago in my notebook #struggled to make it work tho.. #anyways if anyone on this sideblog enjoys m*rvel i have a spideyblog at pbnmj <3 #of which i am currently fixated on. LOL #also playing around with the rendering its half me trying smthn out cause ive been into sketchier stuff #but also partially some amount of just bsing it till i enjoy what it looks like </3