#(there's a method to my sadness)

[krissis-averted]

Mirage

#meow art #lu fanart #lu time #lu time fanart #linked universe fanart #linked universe #angst #he wanted to be a good dad so baaaad #rip time u wouldve been a great dad #iirc in tp he said he died too soon to teach his craft so i think he kicked the bucket before anyof his kid/s were old enough #so sad about him #also if my art seems a lil diff its bc im leanring the loomis method properly now LMAO

[wigglebox]

Sketch dump!

I haven’t been posting a lot for the last couple of months. March through May tend to be struggle months for me in general and I was all set to embrace that this year and try not to feel guilty but - on top of that - there have been a lot of real world factors playing into the fact I hadn’t been motivated to draw. My job went through a lot of changes and as someone who struggles with abrupt changes, every day I got home I just wanted to decompress and not even think about drawing.

But I’m trying to get back into the swing of things. These are all sketches I started either at the end of March or during the last three weeks of craziness. I haven’t been happy with how I keep trying to advance them into full art pieces but I don’t want them to be on my ‘art shelf’ and potentially forgotten about so this is why I am posting here!

I’m hoping life feels a little more stable and balanced starting in May! The good news is this year my allergies aren’t that bad [thanks Flonase and stinging nettle] so I can at least look at my iPad and draw and not have it hurt my head haha.

I know this time of year can be wildly up and down for everyone so I’m hugging you if you need a hug and holding your hand if you need a hand to hold! We’ll get through it!

#wiggleart #destiel #spnfanart #spn art #my sketchbook #usually when this happens it4 also means I need to explore something style wise or method wise #so I will probably be doing that #also I had taking my septum piercing out thinking it was going to #make my sinus issues bad this year like it did last year #but I had it out since the beginning of March #and indeed the hole has closed #I’m so sad

[khytal]

waaaahhhhhh :(

(alternate version w/ blood:)

#kamen rider #shin kamen rider #takeshi hongo #khyt.art #it's been 4 days and I am still so broken up about it #I also haven't. like. drawn with this method in several months so it's a bit rusty but [shaky thumbs up] #(also I did this a few hours after I finished the movie but I didn't pull up any refs so. eeeehh. but it's ok) #if I think about hongo or anything from shin kr for too long my brain starts trying to self-destruct #in a good way (it's not good I am so sad all the time get me out of h-)

[sleepymccoy]

I've spent my morning reading my own fics cos I know I follow up the hurt with comfort!! So here's a link

Oh, Crowley

Includes what is now canon level miscommunications and disasters. Lots of talking badly and being sad. Here's a (highly edited to keep it short) snippet from the start of the fic to whet your appetite

"I don't have a chance with you, do I?" Aziraphale asked. His eyes were wide. He stood a step above Crowley, closer to the door, protected from the few brave and errant drops by Crowley. Crowley's back grew wet for it.

Crowley's heart thumped. "What?"

Aziraphale's fingertips brushed Crowley's cheek, then pressed hesitantly against his jaw. Aziraphale's thumb, soft but worked enough by book pages to have hints of use in its pad, touched Crowley's lower lip and dragged gently, shaking.

Then Aziraphale withdrew.

"Angel," Crowley croaked, although he had no idea what to say, how to discuss anything any more, "are you- ?"

Regret flashed across Aziraphale's face, then settled into place there. His lips trembled in something more like sorrow, but that didn't stick around. The regret remained. "I apologise, dear boy," Aziraphale whispered. "A bit too much champagne, I think. Makes everything a little rose-hued, don't you find?"

Aziraphale looked down, shuffled his feet, adjusted his cuffs, then turned to the door. "Let me know when next suits you for dinner."

The door opened quickly, but closed gently, leaving Crowley alone in the rain.

#good omens #good omens fic rec #self rec? i dunno theres probs a tag for thst #shout out to the person who spent last night reading a bunch if my fics and commenting #made me do the same and i loved it #this one is sad for a while tho #but honestly so cathartic now given season two #i reccomend reading it as a recovery method

[bookishforce]

the only thing I'm grateful to Only Friends about at this stage is introducing me to Force and Book ~~

I will finish it because I want to support them but the glossing over the trauma and not allowing the growth of their characters has actually made me so sad??

Manifesting an excellent series that they're the main couple in next year, they deserve better. I kind of don't rlly understand the hate on them tho? Lots of actors have shitty series & characters (which I don't think is the case with them) and they're still liked? make it make sense plez

#Like some other actor pairs I wasn't impressed with #Even prior to finding ForceBook #but they're loved not hated so #srsly is it because they're older than other actors? #i want to fix the unfairness #it is like watching what happens to talented ppl daily?? #bc they're not talented in the “right” way whatever that is #like talent is subjective anyway? #i often find other characters in ofs to be overreacted #like having set reactions to certain situations #very method acting i guess #but forcebook i don't feel like engage in that as much #not so much method which is not a bad thing at all imo #i haven't been able to take my eyes off of Mew the entire show #because i can see there's a lot more going on #Top too #But the others i kinda got it after a while ik what to expect #they're all v talent #but ik from singing that it's harder to play emotions that aren't sadness & anger #they're sooo much easier to hide behind and tend to look impressive #that's what i feel like is happening here #this feels personal ahhaha

[goldensunset]

from one hot girl to another, the ultimate hot girl has traversed time and space

#i like this pokémon home thing. what a neat trick #kind of peeved it turns out i can’t transfer all my pla shinies #i didn’t even know i had any on this file #i knew about the haunter but i didn’t remember actually managing to catch it #in hindsight i should probably. put that back in pla and evolve it first bc that game’s method doesn’t require trading lol #in addition to this lovely lady today i nabbed skuntank and zubat #the zubat was like. i heard it in the distance and saw the sparkle through the mist #my heart rate shot up. i went to investigate… #and imagine my disappointment. #out of everything it could’ve been it was a zubat. #1. sucky pokémon 2. ugly shiny 3. i literally already had another shiny zubat on that file??? did not know that 4. can’t be transferred #the other sadness is the shiny beautifly i didn’t know i had. what a nice shiny but it’s not compatible with sv either… #man. what is it that determines it. idk #anyway #pokémon #legends arceus #my character isn’t actually hot she’s cute in a dorky way if anything but like. ‘cute girl’ isn’t a Phrase the way hot girl is #i’ve decided to name the samurott ‘pearl’ #in keeping with the gem theme i’ve had with my samurotts #isn’t she lovely? #sv

[chibi-celesti]

Everytime I keep thinking of Malleyuu, I keep thinking back to my Glomas fic and this song.

How Yuu felt powerless to help at the time, and wished they could've done something to help. I swear [Implanter] gives me so many emotions!

#its a sad but hopeful song #i really wish i knew pastalie enough to work on some really good songs of my own #compressed songs like those are beautiful but tough lmao #and dont get me started on Metafalica!! #especially the method version! #twisted wonderland #twst #malleus x reader #chibi-celesti rambles

[pickletrip]

I loved this progression. Yoh didn't even have the will to drink water from the glass, until Segasaki did that.

#my personal weatherman #taikan yoho #bl drama #japanese bl #bl series #segasaki mizuki #segasaki x yoh #how to make your bf drink water when he is having a depressive episode #I wholeheartedly agree with this method #Segasaki is so hot and understanding at the same time #yoh looks like a sad marshmallow

[skrunksthatwunk]

so i read cyrano today. here's some parts i thought were funny in/out of context

cyrano's debut comes with bullying an actor he doesn't like offstage. two acts later he sends a band of musicians after him just to get them off his hands. he also tells them to tell this actor he sent them

and, of course, marmaladegate

#anyway i love cyrano lol #ive seen two different theater productions of it but this is the first time ive read it #anyway. ow. sad. but it's also very beautiful to me #cyrano #cyrano de bergerac #i didnt feel like taking pics of all the space travel methods but those were good. im fond of the magnet most of all i think #theres also bits like where he tells montfleury he's a full moon and after three claps he should eclipse himself #like if you're gonna be fatphobic at least be clever about it yk #plus i think it says more about cyrano's projection of his insecurities than anything else. kinda central idea to the play #i have no idea if these are funny out of context. it's a funny show though. i think seeing it really drives home the humor #kinda like seeing vs reading shakespeare. seeing the actors really breathes life into it #EDIT I FORGOT THE oh wait. an hour? psh PART THATS ONE OF MY FAVORITES. theyre so real for that tbh

[justanotherghostwriter]

.

#I stand by my 7/10 rating for NATLA #But I'm watching the episodes in full (as opposed to flipping through them as I did before) #And I still don't like Bumi or Katara or Iroh's characterisation #But Ozai's is really irking me #Just because I love how the animated version of Ozai is so arrogant #He's not manipulative #Even when going to Azulon to ask for Iroh to be dethroned it's not very subtle. #It's what really sells the “of c I should make a position for myself and rule the world. I'm just that great. And my kid is that great too” #I get what they were going with in NATLA about manipulating Azula with fake affection for Zuko to pit them against each other #But I really think that the animated show's Ozai's abuse is just as damaging. Just different. #“You were born to be perfect like me and every single sign you're not is a disappointment of what you could achieve” is a #psychological MOUNTAIN to put on your kid #IDK. I know it's not a HUGE difference like Bumi but #It irks me. And it's irking me continuously. I liked OG Ozai and his flaws and his methods. #You know in a villain way. It just... #There's a line from “Stormbenders” (yes I've been in fandom that long) where Katara's like #“I have just realised that Ozai and Azula are petty... and that makes them so much more dangerous than I thought” #Similar vein to Yon Rha being “sad and empty” #And for Azula's eventual (need-to-be-hard-earned) redemption arc I just... I want OG Ozai and his nuances #That is the end of my rant I'll go re-watch scarf again

[ruinikaido]

my pinterest board is perfectly curated and perfectly me and my prom dress is so cute and my platforms are huuuuge and the silhouette of the looks nice and i need to lock the fuck in and make sure im actually pretty too for and until prom in may or ill kill myself

#ill do my nails too #anddd i need to get pretty with various methods sad and pained grin #but thats my day today my package cameeeeee

[posixiety]

I just hope everyone will be okay and no one will stay sad for more than a day.

#just screaming into the void #I’ve been sad all day #but tomorrow will be easier #I hope at least #my silly method is that I’m allowed to be sad for a day #then I need to get my shit together and attempt to move forward

[im-pure]

its so ironic that one of the main reasons i got so attracted to baxter's character as early as fuckin, 2021 or 2022 or something--i don't know, way back before his dlc was released--was his strong respect to boundaries. like when he talked about it with conviction i was like "AYO I LIKE THAT."

and then it turns out that very same fucking trait is actually his defense mechanism on STEROIDS that causes EVERY. SINGLE. PROBLEM. in his life.

he puts everything in separate boxes he doesnt let touch. or else it gets MESSY. it's NEAT and TIDIER this way. he can CONTROL things this way.

friends go here. flings go there. hookups go over there. emotions are locked away in a vault in the basement that he's poured concrete over.

he puts a box around himself. it's TINY and he keeps it FAR away from everyone else. he can't even take a step closer to them. when they try to get closer to him, when they dare try to step on the line so close to him, he FREAKS the fuck OUT. you can see his flaws when you're this close. you're STEPPING OVER THE LINE he's set.

he can't let anything mix. he can't let it blur. he can't let it crumble. because everything will be everywhere, and he can't control that. you see, there's a PROPER process to things. and he'll see to it that it gets done right. of course, that process is to be by himself, and leave only footprints behind. to never truly be known. he can't have that. that'll mean you'll leave him; you'll see him for how he really is, how he sees himself: likely actually not that interesting, offering nothing worth staying for. you can't have too many pieces of him, or you'll get the full picture. so he'll hide his pieces in different boxes. you only get one. this is the right way. this is the only way. without ORDER everything is like the ocean: "endlessly deep and unpredictable, with powerful waves and rapid currents." He will get swallowed whole, never to return.

#baxter ur fucking boxes just made things messier oh my god #he's so methodical its sad. he executes his goals well. too well.

[icewindandboringhorror]

Bad news, got back from the vet and my beautiful baby son is going to have to be put down soon, probably tomorrow or the next day, so send him best of wishes for his next few days~ Luckily, he's actually not in a lot of pain (for now, hopefully he won't be) and is acting pretty normal, so I'm hoping he won't suffer at all and everything will be peaceful for him.

#pet death tw #death mention #let me know if I need any other tags #I would post something to help pay for his euthanasia expenses or etc. but I don't know of any secure methods #since I don't know much about stuff like that. I've heard that like on paypal and ebay and stuff people can still get your real name #and some information from their payment receipts or whatever sutff like that. thats part of why I've held off on selling clothes and sculpt #res for so long is trying to find a way to do it that's the most safe. aside from literall yhaving to start an llc and open a business bank #account and run everything on an entirely sepreate thing just so it has no association with my name and etc. #and obviouskly I don't feel like figuring out all of that stuff right now lol #I am busy just trying to make my beautiful meatloaf son comfortable and spend some time with him whilst I can #It's sad. but I'm glad the issues were caught before he was in terrible pain or anything. So suprisingly it was actually a pretty easy #decision. I would rather him go out while he's feeling okay and relatively content then wait until he's in severe #pain or extremely lethargic or etc. So it seems all very sudden but . It's better that way for him. #anyway #of COURSE this has to happen during a heat wave also.. hhrgghhh... #more fuel for my vendetta against summer lol.. Not that it's the season's fault but. something bad happening in the winter #vs. seomthing bad happening in the summer which just adds an extra layer of 'oh yeah on top of everything else #you're going to be sweating and nauseous and chronically uncomfortable!' is like.. >:T #Also for him. part of the issue is lung cancer which has spread and caused a bunch of fluid to build up in his stomach (which is what I #noticed. even though he's acting perfectly fine and normal his stomach was weird and bloated suddenly) #but if part of the problem is his lungs (which look absolutely crazy on xray) then him breathing in hot shitty thick air is definitely #not as comfortable as if he were able to be nice and cool and snuggled in some blankets. etc. etc. #ANYWAY ghhb... send him much luck and positivity!! Really hoping he can make it through the next day or so without #taking a turn for the worst. So hopeing for a peaceful quiet exit and not like tramatic sudden things. etc. etc. #cross your fingers pray to your gods whisper to the night sky so on and so forth. whatever you do that's meaningful to you.

[itspileofgoodthings]

I talk a lot about teaching and all the good parts of it and the powerful parts of it and it’s all true and also there is something so deeply messy and ugly and raw and painful about the real life exchange of it all and how much I just put myself on the line to communicate a truth and how little I get given back in any tangible or metaphysical way.

#wrong use of the word metaphysical but I can’t think of the right one so it will just have to do #if I had certainty that it was doing good then I would take any lack of recompense #but you don’t get certainty. that’s just part of the deal #you just get ingratitude and flatness and boredom and also the knowledge that you’re stupid if you expected any different! #yes yes all the good stuff i say is real #but this part of it is real too! I am really struggling with it at the moment #I wish there was a way to wrangle my expectations and get them in order #and just take what I get as par for the course #because it literally is #I also wish there was a way for me to be more professional in my actual profession #And I am not unprofessional #but I guess every time I’m going to want to put it all on the line even for the smallest chance of changing someone’s mind or heart #but like. Truly sometimes it’s just like—-but i don’t know that it’s wise or worth it to do it #Or if it’s doing any good at all #like truly I don’t mean it in a whiny way #Well a little bit lol #But I also just mean: who knows? Who can say for sure? Not me. #there’s not any guarantee. And also I’m sure some of the methods I use could use work. I’m sure in the grand scheme of things I don’t know #what I’m doing!! anyway I’m so so sad #and it has been a hard week! #it will pass. as will the feeling I’m sure #thanks for listening #teaching tag

[movedtodykedvonte]

The fact that spam ads talk in brackets to get around filters and avoid being blocked. This feature ensures they get to you but also guarantees you know it’s spam and won’t engage with it, no matter what it’s trying to sell you.

Now thinks about the fact that Spamtons speech is effectively this and how the very thing that allows him to continue some type of existence also dooms him to an unhappy, miserable one.

#undertale #deltarune #utdr #thinks about how he was essentially made to constantly be ignored #that the thing that allows him to even get emails out also is the reason they get rejected #and why he is so unlucky and poor #unlucky by the virtue he is not outright dead from ad block or antivirus #like his method is doomed to fail but as spam he has to do it #spamton g addison #Spamton #spamton g spamton #addispam #getting bored being introspective on this guy #I wanna think about him but all my ideas are sad #I just can’t get over how all his contradictions both doom and save him #the moment he is allowed to just be it backfires #send asks about it