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sleekswosobession · 1 month

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but i didn't did pour the whiskey

barça femeni x reader

overview: they said getting over addiction wasn't easy, what about when no one knows? what about when relapse happens after a whole year?

A/N: my requests are sitting... but I can't get to them and im really sorry, ive been so busy atm and dont got much modivation for em'

TW: alcohol addiction, self-hatred, relapse, course language, actual detail instead of me brushing over it

!! viewer discretion is advised, i suggest only mature audiences read this !!

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In all honesty, you'd seen the signs. You'd known the inevitable was coming. The feelings of urge that you'd felt a year ago when trying to stop. You had stopped though, so you ignored it. Then it became more real. To the blank stares at the crates in the stores, rather than the hatred you harboured before after finally being ‘better’.

To walking and judging if you should buy it or not.

To blinking tears out of your eyes, wondering why you'd think that in the first place.

Because why would you, you were better now. Right? That's what you'd told yourself anyways.

It kept amplifying over the course of a week. Until you couldn't take it, until everything you'd worked so hard for for the past year came crashing down. All those memories of countless nights pacing, crying, yelling over a stupid fucking substance fade away.

Guilt. That's all there is. Guilt.

Guilt for betraying your past self who had cried for hours, who felt like she was going psycho over not having a single drink.

But, you can't find it in yourself to stop drinking it. It's just one beer, how harmful could it be? Said by the words of a true fucking alcoholic.

So, you do the only thing you can think of and cry. Cry until your face is numb, your throat burning with every breath, cry until your lungs can't take in any oxygen anymore.

Cry until you feel like you've felt something.

Then when you did stop crying what did you do? The only option you thought you had. Drink more.

- - - - -

You knew you looked like shit, you felt like it too. Your face puffy from the numerous breakdowns the night before, your eyes red from the tears that had an endless flow, dark rings under your eyes from the restless 3 hour sleep you'd got.

Also not to mention the headache you'd acquired. Knowing that only last year if you'd drunk this much, you'd only start to feel something. That's not something to be proud of.

You try your hardest to make yourself look even the slightest bit presentable, getting rid of the puffy face with a shower and taking paracetamol to take away the ache in your skull.

This would do enough to convince them you were fine, it's not like you were the loudest or most obnoxious person on the team. Preferring to observe everything with a smile.

What you didn't consider? Your captains. You're only 22 so even if you're techincally an adult, they're still over 7 years older than you.

So you walk into the lockeroom for training, silently making your way to your cubby as usual. Until, you feel a tug on your sleeve. Alexia is standing there, worry etched into her features.

"You ok? It looks like you've barely slept." Her voice is low and quiet, something you were eternally grateful for.

"Yeah, just a rough night. Thanks capi." You don't lie, but you don't tell the full truth either. She can sense this but doesn't say anymore, allowing you to go back to getting ready.

You take the time to rethink of the previous night, the regret you'd felt immediately after taking the first sip. But, the feeling of being unable to stop.

No matter how much you'd told yourself it was nothing, you know this isn't the end.

You push the thoughts away, clearing your mind of any thoughts before walking out onto the field ready for training.

- - - - -

It was the same people you saw watching you; Alexia, Marta and Mapi. It wasn't every second but enough to showcase they knew something was wrong but just didn't know what.

You had joined in the summer from your old club in Italy. No one knew of the past you'd had with alcohol. It's not like you made an effort to tell them either, they respected your choices not to drink when going out and you didn't need to bring up topics that were from before even moving to Barcelona.

Maybe if they knew, you'd have someone to confide it.

Somehow you'd managed to hide it from your old team as well, but considering the close relationships that Barcelona had with each other you doubted it would be shrugged off as easily.

When training was finally over, you were quick to slip away. As the thoughts and need of what caused you in this melancholic state start to reappear in your mind.

Not now, why after so long did you have to collapse now? When the peak of your career could potentially be around the corner.

You want to survive like a normal person, you want to be able to do things without relying on a fucked up liquid. Why did it have to be you?

And why?

Why is the only thing you can think of to soothe these thoughts, alcohol?

- - - - -

You stare blankly at the open carton, hesitation as you ponder if you should give in or not. Should you drink it? Part of your mind says yes, part of you yearns for it. The rational side says no, and to stop before it's too late.

But wasn't it already?

So you give in. The burning down your throat a painfully familar comfortality.

In a depressing way it makes you more aware of your surroundings, the beer bottles scattered in the room. Liquid all over the floor and on your things. It bothers you, but you can't bring yourself to clean it.

So you sulk, going over past memories. You'd never considered yourself a sad drunk, always being happier and finding a way to goof about while drinking. Then, very rarely toward the end of recovery getting angry. Never sad though.

Times change, people change. You thought you'd changed, but that kind of addiction? It never seemed to leave. Waiting until you're vulnerable to attack. Like an incurable disease.

Before you really comprehend it, the whole box of beers you'd bought yesterday are empty and strown across the floor.

You reach a point of feeling nothing, a numbing feeling brought by guilt, the alcohol making everything seem hazy. Your phone is ringing, but you can't bring yourself to answer. You can't bring yourself to care.

- - - - -

Knocking at your door brings you out of the limboed state you're in. You figure they'll leave soon, and the knocking stops after a minute. Until the door opens revealing the three who had been watching you in the morning.

Alexia is the first to you, the others take in the state of your apartment and walk around elsewhere.

"Hey." It's all she says, but enough for tears to fall from your eyes. You can't bare to look at her face, so you keep your eyes glued to the floor.

"Come on, look at me." She uses her hands to guide your chin so you're looking straight at her.

"Whatever it is, you can tell me." She pauses, "Let's sober you up first." You don't argue, and follow her orders. Exhausted, you pass out as soon as your head hits the pillow.

- - - - -

Waking up was easier than you'd thought it would be, your head not pounding as much as in the morning. It made sense though considering you'd drank less than the night before. There were pills on the side table with a glass of water which you take easily.

The sun is setting so you must have slept for a couple of hours by this point. When you walk into the living room you notice all the rubbish gone, the floors are clean and there's no reminisince of beer anywhere. Alexia, Marta and Mapi are talking quietly amongst themselves and look up once they realise you're awake.

"Come, sit." Mapi pats next to her. You nod silently walking over.

"Would you mind explaining to us what happened? I know you’ve said before don't drink, so this is very new. If you don't want to talk that's also fine but I don't want to see you hurt." Alexia says, she doesn't pry but she does make her point known.

"Ok, but please can you do no talking while I explain? I'm not sure how much I can take if I don't explain it all in one." You're not sure why you opened up so easily, maybe because you desperately craved for someone. Anyone.

"Last year, I was an alcoholic and I can't tell you really when it started. It was to take all the weight and pressure off my shoulders originally, but it turned worse. I just kept drinking regularly and when I tried to settledown, I realised I couldn't. So I didn't stop. It worked for me."

"Then as the season moved on I realised I did desperately need to do something about it but I was just so scared of what people would say to me. How would they react?"

“So instead of getting proper help I did it myself.”

"I got rid of all traces, didn't go out as much. It was horrible. I thought I was going crazy. I wasn't ok at all. I'd obviously relapsed a couple times when trying by myself to recover but it gave me more determination. I'd say it took like 3 months before I truly felt like I was clean."

"Then, I'd had the oppurtunity to play here and it's like everything went away. I should've known better." You sigh.

"Known what? Did you know you were going to relapse again?" Marta asks carefully.

"I saw the signs but ignored them, when I did give in... all I felt was regret, I still do. I think that's why I drank the rest if I'm going to be honest." You look away, not daring to look at any of them.

A pair of arms engulf you, large hands pushing your head to the persons chest.

"Listen to me, we can help you. You won't ever have to do this alone, not while I'm here ok? I don't know much about this, but I'll try. We all will." You start sobbing into her chest, clinging your fists tightly into her shirt. A way to thank them without words.

Because the belief they had in you made you feel like you could do it. Even in these drowning times.

—————————————————————————

i hope you enjoyed fic, this may not be accurate to everyone but this is my experience with battling addiction to alcohol and i write it because i too relapsed after a year recently

this was more for also for awareness and just know that you aren’t alone in anything, if you feel you need someone to talk to i’m always here :)

#woso #woso community #woso x reader #woso fanfics #barcelona femeni #barca femeni #barcelona femeni x reader #barca femeni x reader

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rims-things · 3 years

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Lost in Your Arms

Fanfiction

Genre : Romance / Fluff / Comfort

Pairing : Myul Mang ( Kim Saram) / Tak Dong Kyung

Show : Doom at your Service

Warning : Do not read if you are not comfortable with a little passion between the couple + wound kissing

Setup : It takes place right after episode 12 last elevator scene

Tak Dong Kyung watched him as he stood out of the elevator, with a wrecked look on his face. She was anxious to even think about the fact that this person might be someone she knew. But he, on the other hand, looked confused and afraid at the same time.

She took a step forward to step out of the elevator, but he vanished in thin air. With sheer disappointment, she walked towards her room, blaming everything on her illness.

The next day was a bit hectic for her. She had to go through a lot of tests and some of her initial treatments were getting started. Hardly did she have any time to think of the events of last night. But as the sun went down and midnight approached, she subconsciously waited for him to appear.

She wore her usual hospital dress and an oversized jacket, with her hair loosely tied up in a bun. After unknowingly waiting for him on the terrace, she tried her luck in the parking area.

All she could do was Sigh, looking at all the cars that appeared to be staring at her and asking what exactly was she expecting.

She looked at her bracelet and wondered why it was so precious to her.

I better get back to my room -- she thought.

But just when she was about to head back, she saw the headlights of a car lit up and her eyes instantly fell on a kitten sitting near the tire.

Tak Dong Kyung rushed towards the car and stood right infront, making the person hit the brakes instantly.

She quickly bent down and took the kitten away from the tire.

"Are you okay ? "- she said, caressing the young cat.

"Do you want to die too ??? " yelled the man who came out of the car.

Dong Kyung let the cat slide away as she stood up to face the man. He looked extremely furious.

"I'm sorry Sir, there was a ..." she tried to give an explanation when she noticed a Knife and blood on his hand.

"Is that blood ? What did you do? " She asked, suspecting that he was some sort of a criminal.

Her guess was right, and she could hear a buzz in the hospital. But before she could act on it, the man grabbed her by the hair and tried to put her into the car.

"I'll kill you too " he declared as he opened the door to put her inside, but Dong Kyung couldn't give up so easily. She resisted and tried her best to scream but he covered her mouth with his hand.

"Just get inside the car if you want to live " the man shouted, he wanted to run away before the security got to the parking area and he couldn't leave a witness.

He was almost about to put her inside the car when he sensed a weird tension in the air. Everything was strangely silent all of a sudden.

It was then, that Dong Kyung noticed a tall figure standing at a short distance. As he approached them, she could see who it was. He wore a long wine colored coat with a sweater allowing a generous display of his neck.

He walked towards them with his hands in the pockets of his loose trousers. His face looked pale and eyes red with anger. She noticed the lights starting to flicker, the same way it had happened the night before.

"Who are you " the killer asked.

"Myul Mang " He said , tilting his head slightly to dart his eyes at the killer's hand which had grabbed Dong Kyung's hair.

The killer instantly left her and she fell to the ground.

"Aah.." she said, as she hit the surface.

Myul Mang stared at the killer with fury in his eyes.

The criminal picked up his knife again and tried to reach Dong Kyung, but she was quick enough to get up right on time and run towards Myul Mang.

She crashed on him against his chest and grabbed on to him as tightly as possible.

Myul Mang didn't move. He kept staring at the killer.

"He has killed someone " Dong Kyung whispered to him in terror.

He looked down at her and it was then that he noticed a small scratch on her neck because of the force with which the killer might have grabbed her.

He frowned and looked back at the man who was frozen near his car.

"I would have simply handed you over to the Police, if you had not done that to her " Myul Mang informed before blinking his eyes which was enough to bring doom on the killer.

His neck suddenly tilted and with the sound of a bone crack, he fell to the ground.

Tak Dong Kyung shut her eyes and hugged Myul Mang tightly, scared to imagine what was happening at her back. He gently put one of his hand on her head.

"Are you okay ? " He asked in a whisper, to which she nodded.

When she lifted her head up to look at him, she felt something change around her. When she looked towards her right, she found herself in an entirely different place.

It was a large mysterious hall, with lamps lit with fire. She could see a large circular window behind him which had a dark shade of blue.

Her eyes widened and she looked at him in confusion.

"Where are we ?" She asked.

"It's my home " he said with a straight face.

She walked away from him and looked around. The place felt familiar but she couldn't remember anything.

"Have I been here before?" She asked.

"I hope not. " he said nervously.

She gave him a scared look and went ahead to sit next to the large window. She could see the night sky and twinkling stars.

"It's beautiful.." she exclaimed.

Myul Mang walked up to her which made her stand up instantly. She guessed he was there to say something, but he stood merely inches away from her.

She coughed slightly and looked away, feeling his intense gaze on her.

"Where did he hurt you? " He asked, taking his hand near her neck where he had seen the injury.

But she instantly grabbed his hand and looked back at him.

"What did you mean back then? "

Myul Mang raised his brow.

".. when you said, you would have simply handed the killer to the police if he had not done this to me " she questioned.

He instantly took his hand off from her grip and moved back. He sighed and looked away. Obviously, he had no answer.

" Did you kill him ? " She asked, swallowing a lump in her throat.

Myul Mang stared back at her.

"Would you hate me if I did ? " He asked.

"No." She replied, without giving it a second thought. She herself was clueless how she was so confident that she wouldn't hate him.

"Why?" He asked.

"Because I'm sure you might have done it for a reason. You're that kind of being." She answered in a go, as if it was already there in her subconscious.

He felt he had heard that before, but when? He couldn't recall.

It made him anxious and he walked back to her, raising his hand towards her neck again.

"Let me see please.. " he pleaded, but she backed off.

"Keep your hands away until you answer me " she said.

"What ? " He asked.

Tak Dong Kyung sighed.

"I think.. I know you.. but I dont remember, have we met before ?" She said, searching for answers.

Her questions made him confused, as he already had his doubts. He gulped in and looked away, unable to understand what to say.

"I don't know " he said.

Tak Dong Kyung took a deep breath before continuing.

"I don't remember anything, but I feel, I was happy with you..I feel....

.. I.. loved you" she spoke.

What she said, made him restless and he walked to her staring deep into her eyes which were welling up.

He pursed his lips and tried not to react to what she just said. He wanted to escape the situation as soon as possible, but he was concerned for her as well. And somehow, he knew what she was saying might even be true.

He sighed and gulped in before speaking up.

"Let. Me. See." He said sternly, clearly trying to avoid what she was saying.

She shook her head for a No.

"Keep your hands off. Answer me first."

It was enough to make him loose patience and he instantly pulled her towards him, encircling his hands around her waist.

She was taken aback as she immediately grabbed his coat to prevent herself from falling.

"What are you doing? " She asked, trying to catch her breath.

His gaze pierced her soul. It was just a little scratch she had on her neck, but he wanted it gone as soon as possible. Even he didn't know why he felt that way, given that he already knew she was going to die soon.

"You want me to keep my hands off. Fine."

She looked at him, confused about what he exactly meant.

To her surprise, he suddenly tilted his head, leaned down to her neck, and planted a soft kiss on the scratch.

Her stomach twisted as she felt his lips on her skin. She inhaled sharply and clenched the collar of his coat tighter.

He lifted his head up and looked at the scratch disappear. But he soon realized that he had escalated the tension between them. She had shut her eyes and was gasping for air.

"It's gone now" he said, looking at her intently.

She opened her eyes slowly and gathered courage to look up at him.

She felt a strange comfort when their eyes met.

"It was just a scratch" she whispered.

"Then just thank me " he said, his voice cracking.

She swallowed and gasped, but her mind wasn't working well at all. Without much control on herself , she let her feelings take over and she stood on her toes to reach his lips and cover the gap between them.

He did not know she would do something like that all of a sudden, but given the situation, he surely was expecting it to happen.

He shut his eyes as he felt her lips move against his. It took him few seconds to let his guard down and let his heart decide what was to be done.

She inhaled rigorously when she felt him responding to the kiss. His grip around her waist tightened and he pulled her closer into his himself.

She wrapped her hands around his neck and deepened the kiss. She felt giddy with the rising heat within her. For some reason, his lips felt familiar, she knew she had kissed him before, but she couldn't remember.

He played with her lips as if they belonged to him, and suddenly felt a slight touch of her tongue in his mouth.

She wanted more. Subconsciously.

He gasped and let her enter his mouth, pushing her back against the wall next to the window, without leaving her lips for even a second.

She winced as she felt her back hit the wall and his strong chest pressed against her tiny physique.

He pulled her up a little by her waist so she could stand on his feet, making it easier for her to kiss him back.

He explored her mouth, sending shivers down her spine. She moaned and struggled to breath. He passionately delved into her mouth, making her dig her fingers in his hair and pull it gently.

He groaned and kissed her fervently, feeling her tiny fingers tugging on to his hair.

She felt his hands kneading the soft skin on her waist.

Her hands instinctively grabbed the colar of his coat and with a little effort, she pushed it back. He made a slight movement of his arms to let the coat slip off his body and fall on the ground.

He gave her little time to catch her breath before cupping her face and kissing her back.

She slid her hand to his waist and clenched his sweater. She felt her toes curl with each movement of his tongue in her mouth.

He slipped his hand in her soft hair and opened the loose bun she had, letting her hair flow open.

He carressed her neck as he kissed her more.

After a while, he stopped and looked at her, his face was crimson red with the rush of blood and lips slightly swollen.

Both of them struggled to breathe as he spoke.

"Tak Dong Kyung.. " he panted.

She gasped and felt nervous with the way he took her name. His eyes were filled with passion.

"I don't remember why.. I don't remember how and I don't remember since when.. but.. I love you..."

She smiled a little and a tear rolled down her cheek.

"I feel I Love you too.. Kim Saram" she whispered, before kissing him back.

A/N : Thank you so much reading! This is my first work on the doom couple! :) Sorry if there were any mistakes :( Please leave your reaction here :) I will write more if you all liked it <3

#dong kyung #doom at your service #doomatyourservice #doommates #myeol mang #myul mang #park bo young #seo in guk #kdrama #seo in gook #tak dong kyung #fanfic #fanfiction #romance

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prettyboongi · 4 years

Text

Just a Pesky Night Terror

Reader x Kim Seokjin

Word Count: 828

Genre: Angst, Fluff

Rating: General Audiences (suitable for any age!)

Warning: Night terrors (hence the title lol), implied anxiety

[A/N: Funny enough I thought of this story after waking up from a night terror and feeling hella anxious earlier today (dont worry I’m better now). I’m actually pretty prone to night/sleep terrors. It really sucks waking up feeling restless and panicked and it’s even worse when you wake up feeling this way alone. Fortunately, there are times when my boyfriend is there when I have one and he comforts me until I fall back to sleep :) It’s just nice when there’s someone to make you feel safe again. Haha sorry for rambling, I hope you guys like this one!]

It was a sharp shift of the bed that woke up Seokjin in the early hours of the morning. Sharing a bed with you, his girlfriend, he just assumed you were getting up to use the bathroom. Expecting to see you getting up to go, Jin turns his body to find you still in bed.

You were sitting up right beside him. Something seemed off about the way you were sitting. You were leaning forward with your usually postured back hunched over. Jin could tell you were trying to catch your breath by the way your shoulders repeatedly rise and lower. Jin stared at you for a moment in the dark bedroom, only the bright blue moonlight coming from the window illuminating your tense body.

Jin slowly sits himself up, trying to make sure he doesn't make any sudden movements to startle you. However, his efforts proved to be in vain once he places his hand on your shoulder, causing you to gasp loudly and jump up a bit. You looked back at your boyfriend with a sheer look of panic on your face, your eyes widened and glassy.

Jin was taken aback by the fear of your eyes but still moves closer to comfort you further.

"Hey hey, calm down," he says to you in a soothing tone, "you're safe."

Still a bit dazed, you couldn't find the words to speak, so you just silently shook your head.

"Tell me what's wrong, honey. Did you have a bad dream?"

Jin waits for your answer, even searching for one in your eyes.

"Yeah," you finally replied, "it was a really bad one." You can barely remember what the dream was about but it still managed to make you feel shook to the core.

Jin gently rubs circles on your back. While not totally soaked through, your thin white pajama top was damped with cold sweat, the fabric clinging to your back. "Do you want me to get you some water? It'll help you calm down."

Without looking at him, keeping your eyes on your sheet covered lap, you muttered a quiet, "Yeah, I'd like that."

Jin gives your shoulder a reassuring squeezing and a kind smile that makes your feel safer already. He switches on the lamp on his nightstand before heading out of the room, towards the kitchen. Once there, he swiftly flips the lights on. His sleepy eyes weren't ready for the bright fluorescent lighting so he had to squint his eyes for almost a minute straight as they got adjusted to the light. He takes out a glass from the cabinets and fills it with water from the built-in water filter attached to the faucet. He then quickly grabs a couple of chocolate chip walnut cookies for a late night snack, turns off the lights and heads back to the room.

When Jin arrives back to the room, he now finds you sitting on the edge of the bed, scrolling through your phone. Seeing him, you looked up on your phone and shot him a weak smile. It seemed like you calmed down a bit since Seokjin left the room, though he could still see traces of sadness and anxiety on your face.

"Here you go," he hands you the glass, "makes sure to drink all of it." He says this to you as if you were a helpless child and he was an overprotective parent. But, in all honesty, you really loved that about Jin; it made you feel taken care of.

As you slowly took sips of the cool, refreshing liquid, Jin sits next to you on the bed. Munching on one of the cookies, he silently watches you as you finish up your glass. "I'll take that," he says as he takes your empty glass and places it on his nightstand. Next to you again, he holds up his second cookie, offering it to you.

A gentle smile stretches your lips and you gladly take the cookie from his grasp. "Thank you, Jinnie."

"Is there anything bothering you, Y/N? You know you can tell me."

You finished up your cookie before answering. "To be honest, there are a lot of things on my mind. But I don't feel like talking about it right now."

"Okay, honey." He understood how you felt and didn't want to further pry.

"But later on maybe. I'm just really tired right now."

Jin softly chuckles and leans down to kiss your forehead. "Let's go back to sleep then."

After turning off the lamp, the two of you crawl back into your comfy bed. Immediately settled, you move closely to Jin and rest your head on his strong chest. He instinctively finds his hand on your hair, curling your locks with his fingers.

You let the heaving of Jin's chest slowly put you back to sleep. And knowing that you were more relaxed and fast asleep, he let himself fall asleep with you safe in his arms.

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minjoonalist · 4 years

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Predilection | Chapter five

Pairing : Jikook x Reader [Feat. Taehyung]

Words: 1.8k

Genre: Angst, eventual Smut, fluff

Warnings : explicit wording, characters under the influence, bad judgement, (I will make it clear that the characters in this chapter are definitely of age.)

Description: you want him, he wants you, but he also wants him, and him wants you- but him hurt you. So You hate him.

+++

Its somewhere around 7:00 am in the morning and amongst all your fellow early classmates waiting to board the trip’s bus, you find yourself spacing in and out of your own head. Your stomach in knots, eyes puffier than usual and although you’ve tried to calm yourself through an entire night of restless tossing and turning - you just couldn't shake the miserable feeling of dread.

“ Y/n...Y/N?!” There's a hand waving in your face catching your attention. Like a trance being broken, your best friend watches worriedly while your eyes seem to snap open in shock. Seeing him, makes the question ring in your head for the hundredth time, the very one you lied to. Whether or not you found your own body betraying your emotions for the boy you hated.

You kissed him back.

Jeon jungkook knew what it felt like to have your lips moving desperately against his in such an intimate fashion. Your lips permanently painted with the feel of his impressionable touch. The event, unfortunately, was still on your mind heavy, your thoughts consumed within the strange dilemma that you’d somehow gotten yourself into and to make it worse- you now truly had no one to really talk about it with.

“Did you...D-Did you sleep at all last night?” Taehyung stumbles in front you and it if it weren't for the devastating guilt running through you, you wouldn't have noticed the very clear and real suitcase coming by his side. Which reminded you of your suitcase...and that you were really going to be stuck with those two for an entire week...

Focusing, You try to swallow in your very dry mouth, your eyes blinking slowly to take on the equally as sleep deprived looking boy. His eyes a bit dark all around, hair disheveled, and there's an alarming aura around him that you couldnt say you were used to.

Was he nervous?

“Me? Tae you look like you want to get hit by a train.” you retort yawning in exhaustion “something Tells me I'm not the only one who didn't dream of pillows and sheep”. Letting your bag down from your shoulder, you wince from your tense muscles screaming in agony and a sigh could be heard from him.

“Excuse you, but I did get some sleep- at least that was before you came panicking at my door.” he denounces while creating an evil glare.

“ we only talked for an hour, don't blame your obvious insomnia for yoongi on me” you spit back and while taehyung was too busy dropping his mouth to the floor, the scarce amount of your classmates had begun to fill in including your professor.

By then, the sun was beginning to rise even further in the sky and by the looks of all the tired faces surrounding you, you could tell it was almost time to depart on the trip - aka hell. Your nerves suddenly getting the better of you, you slowly start to sink further into the troubling mess of your emotions and just as you were beginning to realize how surreal your situation was, your eyes catch a notable figure in the distance.

Silver hair shining within the powerful breeze, as a ringed hand comes up to help keep it at bay. He struts up towards the surrounding crowd of students, catching multiple glances of onlookers, but whether or not he acknowledges them through his square rimmed shades, it remains a mystery. A black leathered luggage by his side, Jimin stops his stride just a few feet away from you and tae, however his focus remains on the phone held within his other hand.

“Oh great! The ballerina's here.” taehyung cheers sarcastically, meanwhile every fiber within your body was stilled from how aware you were of his presence. Okay...so this was still just a bit harder than you’d thought it would be...you think while taking a deep breath. As much as you wanted to pretend you felt absolutely nothing for the male hovering by the both of you, you couldn't deny the quickened pace within your chest when he suddenly snaps his head in your direction.

Your gaze quickly goes elsewhere.

“Tae I don't know if I can do this...” you swallow, a hard lump coming into your throat. You think you’re going to be sick…

“Do what?” Taehyung frowns, A deep crease in his brow from your confession, however it disappears once he puts its together himself. Both of his brows now shooting up towards his hairline “You're not thinking of Failing this course are you? Y/n we’ve talked about this, you're going to be fine. I’ve told you, you can stay the night with me and yoongi if you don't want to be on your own.”.

And just like that, You cast your gaze downwards, a feeling of hopelessness washing over. You suddenly find your feet a bit too interesting “ I- I don't know…I think this might be too much Tae. I know you w-want to be alone with yoongi and I...well I’d pretty much just be cock blocking you. Plus, I just don't know if I can handle being with them the way it is-” you stutter shakily.

Stepping closer, Taehyung pulls you into an abrupt warm hug, bringing you closer until your head was resting comfortably on his firm chest “ Hey, Hey- no matter what, I’ll be glad to have you around anytime. Besides, it’s pretty bold of you to assume I wouldn’t be pounding into min yoongi, because you're in the next room- I couldn’t care less if you watched.” he pulls back to look you in your eyes, a clear look of doting support across his features.

Meanwhile you scrunch your face up in disgust “I think I’d rather hear them before I hear you- at least I won't really be able to visualize their faces.”

Tae stares at you blankly before he lifts a brow “...You’re telling me, you wouldnt want to watch me fuck someone else...me? The unbelievably hot best friend who had you shirtless the first time we met?”

You cringe again “ You seriously have to stop talking about that night...I would like to not remember getting my heart broken and then having even my current best friend reject me.” you move to step away from him and more towards the slowly growing crowd. You never liked talking about the night you met Taehyung, because in all honestly- it was probably the worst night of your life. Unfortunately, it also happened to be the night jimin and jungkook had first debuted as couple and on top of that- you really dont want to venture back into a territory where sex was possible between the both of you.

Getting closer towards the others, you feel taehyung easily catching up with your walking figure. His arm comes naturally around your shoulder like always before he speaks “ Well of course I rejected you, you were completely heartbroken like an adorable sad puppy.”

“Wow this conversation just keeps getting better and better....By the way this is doing wonders for my confidence, just thought you should know.” you mutter sarcastically while trying to shove his arm off of your shoulder. He doesnt move it, instead catching on to the hurt hidden behind your sarcasm. He then uses his arm to stop you, the pressure of it keeping you from walking any further.

He rolls his eyes “Wait, because I don't think you understand. The reason I stopped wasn't because you were just some sad random girl. Well- actually yes it was, but it was also because…” he huffs “ You were also really sweet and innocent, you didnt deserve some asshole who was going to fuck you senseless and then disappear the next day. So I stopped and when you broke down then cried, I held you, remember?” he tries to put on a smile that opposes your bitter pout.

As much as you hated to admit it, Everything he’d just said was true. Taehyung did stop that night and you knew that, because you remembered that night vividly.

The both of you bursting through some random bedroom door for privacy.

Only moments ago you’d just seen your best friend and your crush making out in back the of a graduation party together and when you confronted Jungkook about it, he’d acted as if he had no idea what you were talking about. Angry, you stormed off, tears collecting your eyes and you made your way over towards the snack table to down an entire cup of vodka.

Moments later, A firm hand suddenly sliding it’s way onto your back that makes you turn to look at the culprit. Enters Taehyung. Dark hair, boxy smile, but red sultry eyes drinking in your poor body as he pulls you closer towards him “ You look like you could use some fun, want to go upstairs?” he would breathe slowly into your ear.

You remembered sliding your eyes back towards the raven haired boy that just so happened to be watching you and Taehyung like a hawk from across the room. Your eyes just barely being able to find him through the sea of people, An emotion swirling dangerously behind them.

In a time like this, Jungkook would already be there ready to save you when needed. But with the combination of anger, the vodka, and a growing euphoria of feeling Taehyung’s hands roaming all over your waist, you were certain you wouldn't need it.

Which brings you back towards the private room. Taehyung locks the door behind him, reaching for you to slam his mouth onto yours. The kiss is sloppy, aggressive and you were loving every second of it. His teeth nipping and pulling at your delicate lips before he’s lifting you up into his arms. A soft yelp leaves your mouth and he chuckles arrogantly into the kiss while walking the both of you further in. In a flash, he has you landing on top of the small room’s bed, his own body coming to hover above yours and you relish in the feel of his hips sliding between your legs.

As if a chill comes by, you suddenly shudder under him. The heated make-out warming you up enough to definitely have your panties soaked, but for some reason...you felt cold. Taehyung continues unknown to this, laying wet kisses from your mouth and down towards your neck. His own drunken lust, blinding him from the way your arms were desperately hugging him closer to feel any kind of warmth.

It wasn't until he suddenly sat up from you. His hands reaching for the hem of your shirt to pull it above your head and have you falling down onto your back. He takes a moment to look at your half naked torso, a look of appreciation washing over his eyes as he rakes them further up to stare at you.

He-

Why were there tears in your eyes?

+++

Chapter Five | Next Chapter | Masterlist

Taglist: @rkivemagic @peterrogers15 @sessi03 @brokencrownqueen @cainami @icedoutmywristtitanic @kawaiimusiccollection @toddsgirl27

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whimsically-ominously-auspice · 4 years

Text

So this is a good video with lots of details and it should help explain why and how these officers are arrested.

This goes back to George Floyd. Remember i said it didn't matter who and what George Floyd had done -- when those officers put on their uniforms and went to him as cops and purposely killed him in that manner it changed things

Every time I write about how we have specific requirements people have in their death for their criminal activity in lui of prison I write how we have specific people allowed to do it.

Now some demanded they be killed by cops. And i refused that in excepting where they "rat" out their cop friends or up to 4 regular friends or co-workers and we set and/or allow it to occur that way. And i stipulated that they must be off duty if they were going to do anything for the Earth. Off duty cops only. And to which a reluctant agreement and/or an immediate acceptance did occur. And they did rat out their friends already there. So that was in their favor so they accepted off duty out of uniform officers. I said that they could like be listening to the police scanner and then go on their own to a crime in place and then be unidentified in news articles. Just as their clothing did not identify them, the news media and other officers would not identify them either.

We had a whole rule sheet. Which we all 100% agreed to. African American. Caucasian. Hispanic. Latino. Zulululu. Tribeca. Original human. And more. It wasn't a just three or four people we had over 100 people with each and every minority race accept at least twice with 2 different individuals. I worked with the meanest. Moat stubborn and most dictatorial. Then others read over the document I typed as we talked and signed it on approval. 254 people. 10 non criminals signed off. 34% African American criminal.

Because we scheduled on the Black Lives Matter, we wanted a majority of African American of mixed alien and evil human to have their say. They will add the document onto this post. And likely blur the signatures for privacy.

This was a Middle man. He wasn't sure if he wanted to have his family suffer through jail time and all that for his sanity to know he's loved or cut and dry have it over for them immediately and them.

So they signed another form where it was not like the other which was just sign random like a year book. But in a list. At that time those who were undecided could be dismissed if they signed onto one or the other is fine whatever is Destiny is. Or if they were firm. Some like the one whom was hung stayed because he was one of the ones who fought for procedure for the criminals. Then we brought more People in to have their voices on other subjects.

So they were grouped as to how and why. Then at the end we emailed and said this is all we have. Your last time to vote is now. And so if they changed it, then they were taken single and asked why or did they want an option mix so it was a mystery zzz

George Floyd was there and he did rat out his police he was working with and we told him because they were police it was our choice. And we would not ever say he told.

George Floyd then brought over Rayshard and said he had death questions and that was all

And I said "well what are you doing George?! Don't mix him up! He was fine! Hes a strong good one"

"You know. You're so weird you give us love and support although you hate us" George Floyd replied. I didn't know what to say. I did. And it hurt my chest and it was exhausting and literally made me sick. But I still felt it was the right thing to do. But they broke my heart. I did give them all 100% of my love. And it nearly killed me. And I was grateful he noticed. I was killing myself for them and he knew. And he cared about that.

"You know I feel real When I've cared about you and well all the others, too. And you feel that? I've given you all my love as a friend as best i could. My tolerance and patience and I just want to say thank you that you noticed"

He blushed and he admitted that he wanted to get out of the life. And George Floyd, did.

In 2008. I told him, "George Floyd, talk to me. I have a feeling. I see you will die anyway because you're in a dangerous position. So if you are killed while trying to get clean, what do you want me to do for you?"

He was not thrilled and his head spun "by who?"

"Cops. Or someone you think is family. I see not a knife but a manual killing. Like its not an auto like gun But hand to hand but it's fast and you suffer..." I lowered my eyes from his beautiful face and looked down at my laptop key board... "Less" and I kept my head bowed to breathe. To not cry. To keep myself sane and we'll balanced. Then I took a deep breath. And tuned to my left where my officials were "hey I have a problem. He's going to be killed when he's innocent"

George Floyd asked for a riot. All i could tell him was it was a dark and suffocating but fast and nearly painless death. "Almost relaxing when you pass. There's something wrong with you isnt there? See now i actually thought you were a CIA agent sitting over there like under cover. But you die. I am feeling it now --- every thing is too wild inside of you, uncontrolled. Like you're...... Restless for lack of a better word. Here come sit next to me"

"But that's your daughter's chair"

"She will come to me. Sit in my lap if she doesnt like you"

"Is this a test?"

"No i want to talk to you and you're too tall and it's hurting my neck to look up at you"

"Oh it's too tall!"

They explained the bone structure in my neck and how then it had been broken 66 times and it was painful. He got nervous. I let him settle himself.

"So what is it you want to talk to me about"

"Well you meddle ... No... You progress.. What im talking to you. I see you lurking over the lists and talking to everyone that passes and I'm wondering how they're taking it"

"Oh its good. It's good. Can i go now? I feel like I'm in the principal's office"

My daughter and Declan came preventing his escape. And my daughter accepted him, gave him a hug and sat on his long thigh

"That's not Snoop, you know that?!" I asked her

"Oh mommy you're so silly. I know snoop and this isn't"

She talked to him and judged him as "nice"

"So is it money that you're doing your life like this?"

"Oh what? Yeah" tears came from his eyes. "What's more is I didn't know what to do with myself. I was angry at the world. And i just.. Just.. Made a mistake. But I'm ready to admit to it and own up to it and so is he. But he won't stop, he told me. But i will. I'm thinking and that's what i been telling all them folks, the bros, "im stopping. You with me?" And oh woah. I feel so much better i was so nervous like what is with me and now i feel just a release! Thank you for caring about me"

He reminded me of Jesse James.

"What is your least way you want to die?"

"Oh by cop.I signed up for hanging because I knew you didn't want to and you'd check my file and hopefully then see I was worth living"

I felt this emotional turbine inside of me. A mix of extreme joy and sadness because I knew the world wouldn't work out for him but he was so simply amazing and Gracious and just one beautiful soul. And I told him so. Crying then laughing.

So with him we worked out, the last and worst death to be written in yellow. Then a second option, for I don't mind mystery in purple or pink. And the main option in black or blue.

The worst deaths were to be kept secret. In a seperate locked file that no one has access to but tree Which could release it for revenge sake.

I've felt George Floyd around me a lot since his death.

Rayshand Brooks signed on the same line both yellow and purple. For death by cop.

George Floyd wasn't supposed to die at all.

Rayshand. Was. So those that die in manner they dont want but were scheduled to die, we burn one of my buildings. We water the areas and business around the building we will burn before lighting the fire.

The reason why they're looking for our arson in Atlanta for Wendy's is because she didn't water and it was next to a gas station. And it was on her list of things to do. So the news report stating the 10k award to find her means that she will not be paid for that nights activity because the area around must be watered especially at a gas station. She didn't when push the emergency stop button at the station which is recommended if watering cannot be done. All she did was set the fire and it was a great fire. But she didnt do any other protocol. Only after 5 hours did she admit to not following safety practices. Another girl went and checked the gas station after the fire started and asked the cashier what to do and they decided together to push the emergency stop button and then water the areas around the pumps and in the parking lot with a hose.

It doesn't matter before or after but "recommended steps" means you're gonna recommend I pay you to do shit. I can't order you to do shit that is somewhat illegal to my own mind I can't ask someone to break the law. So all my orders are "recommendations" if you do one thing on the list, you do them all.

It was a $12k payout for the "arson and all the recommendations" it's an a la carte list, all jobs are. Each job pays the # at the end.

#1. Arson

#2. Water 6

#3. press emergency stop 4

#4. stick around to not observe but keep people safe 2

That was the order for Wendy's.

Class how much do we pay for arson? Nothing. The public finds it offensive and illegal.

Watering pays $6,000 if there's 10 people it depends on how much they do. All ten may get the full $6,000 and some may not if they were just standing by to be second hand water for emergency. Then it's at least $2k I have it all rigid and perfected but they pay how they do. Like sometimes you'll water but then someone else will come and you gotta pee and you get adhd and go talk to bystanders and go talk to cops and go drive in the car and check the hood. So you began watering with 2 others and a 4th came up. So you get $2k for 10 minutes plus then other pay. ESPECIALLY since it wasn't your job. CIA only.

Pressing the emergency stop. You can do that on your own then you must notify the gas station attendant of the danger they are in so they may flee (which was written in details) it pays $4,000 also you have to block the driveway to stop cars from entering. Using wet floor signs or traffic cones or water buckets for windshield cleaning what ever is available. I secretly then give businesses a GIFT if we have to close them and i label it under some kind of just good business neighborhood gift. For loss of income during our insanity. Which in this case is $10k for the gas station

Now the Wendy's burned so well due to the fuel inside. And this girl didn't have anyone to clear the Wendy's of financial records or goods. Computers and other Shit. I assumed she did.

The furniture inside should been removed due to vivid and it being a potential burn site. Nothing should,remained but the kitchen. The food in this case could been taken out as well. All you have to do is your jobs.

But whatever. People aren't thinking.

I didn't understand so much why the Mayor was so PISSED because i have a different view and job. And so now I see. Which we haven't got to that point yet.

Im going to continue on fire danger.

Wendys is full of oil. Which the storage oil for future use should be removed. As well as bread and vegetables and so on. What the fuck is the point to burn a big ole building of a restaurant if you're not gonna serve vegetable and cheese sandwiches in the parking lot while watching it burn?

A BBQ without the meat! A roast without the marshmallows!

Oil can be given to other fast food restaurants. Idc what i don't want is containers of oil exploding. Usually they're in plastic so they melt so its not a major issue but it needs to be checked.

Our CIA are given a key and the alarm pass code so they have time and ability to be very cautious in what is left inside.

This one did a "stick up" no hostages and lit the fire with the workers still inside. Waving a gun around

Protocol is waving a badge "this restaurant is now closed due to the proximity of the crime scene"

So we have to pay those particular employees for trauma now.

Which is coming 100% out of whoever told her not to do that shit. That she's supposed to do, as well as whatever I decide to pay her due to apparently now I hear some Jack ass running scores and thinking they know more than me. And since she code red at the store were going to evaluate what she was thinking.

And so I will continue. The oil baskets must remain uncovered and open to prevent explosions.

They can be drained to the floor but as long as they're open they don't have to be drained.

And there's a lot done for safety because of the potential for explosions.

So the point is that its an honor. Its lighting a torch. Like the statue of liberty for a bad example.

I asked George because some people walking by twisted my heart. I asked him to help me clarify. Because he would get nervous like. Antsy. So those particular people wanted to be good but they had blockages to prevent them. Deep psychological issues that stopped them.

So I asked for them to be honest and use the yellow.

This is how Mr Brooks took all his deaths and wrote his name on the topic death lists in yellow next to his colors.

It was about more money. But they had such conflict within themselves.

We had my daughter to verify character, i get so busy i like a clear mind to verify.

So like Mr Brooks was confirmed nice. "I don't like what you do but I hope you get better" Declan said and gave him a hug around his neck.

My mouth dropped open.

So our burning of buildings symbolizes the mental hell these people suffered and we continue in hope and prayer for their souls to be set free by then making a community park with freedom, free fresh food and so on.

"Freedom Parks, Miss Rosa Parks" may they find a goal worth suffering for.

And not suffering for money.

Its an extremely spiritual thing.

Its a movement like non other that has ever existed.

We got permission from most governors. When that didn't allow, we went to mayors and city council. To get permits and permission.

For Atlanta they blocked the fire truck's traffic.

I prefer fire truck on sight for community development. The sight of a fireman watering down the area around the burn site -- were not firemen we dont know how to put out a fire.

So protocol. Is watering the infrastructure around,the fire. Talk to by standers and make a community effort in being available and around and there for the community

Every now and again a certain type of not normally used full force blast to show the fire if sprayed directly (in that manner) will make the fire jump and burn higher. To show they're not stupid.

Because me? I'd be all wtf? Put the fire out!!!!

So there's a traditional way since the Black Panthers movement that it's done.

And so fire men are supposed to say "we're letting it burn out" if people ask "because it's safer" from me -.- muhaha.

Then I REALLY like firemen to let people try on and check out their fire gear and explain what happens and how they save people from burning buildings and stuff like that.

Usually i have a low key know it all lurking so he can help explain.

Its like a little carnival full of carnage.

Free food behind the fire truck and the firemen talking to people and "showing off" and so on.

That is what is supposed to happen.

We did that with black Panthers in NYC and so on. But we were extremely careful. 2 or more streets away we had a full street of vendors with food trucks and free food and drinks and some selling things very cheap like me and the shirts and candy and cokes.

Water was always free on fire nights. I was out even id the fires were not burning. And usually it was an abandoned building that wasn't fixable and wasn't historic and we built city parks. Playground mostly. And cashew trees. Nut as oppose to fruit trees Bec they're less messy than rotting fruit on the playground floor.

Sometimes white supremacy burned the buildings and then I would buy them.

That is how it started. The white supremacy began burning a building I just bought for apartments. But it burned too fast to save. I was devastated

I knew the only way to beat them was join them. Besides physically beating them in the street

But if a fire was burning they were happy. Didn't matter who started it they took credit.

Our buildings are death specific. And not many. Mostly for black men that are killed and killed by police in uniform or some how on the yellow

BUT it is A Specific Type of Person we burn for. And we burn to release their Hell. "The building is in inferno to represent Hell. Keep it out of your mind and soul and it will stay out of your life if you let it"

Then we put a Freedom Park that's community based and community benefiting to show them what they could done with the Hell on thier mind as opposed to what they did do.

Now simply Mr. Baker requested incarceration as opposed to death. He thought he could change in prison. Unfortunately he ran out of time.

Now for the officers being charged with homicide. The officers were in uniform.

Nothing more. Nothing less.

A CIA Agent could been requested

We could had a sniper. We could had one getin the car with Mr Baker and kidnap him.

What I saw was the police intervene as showing they had set him up and the kidnapping wouldn't go through because he was a set up.

It could been done in secret.

What happened was IN UNIFORM after being shot, laying down he was kicked in the head then his shoulder stood on. That is what CIA is allowed to do, not regular police men in uniform

That's why they're being arrested

Simply.

As I've ranted on, CIA has extreme protocol.

Police do as well

I fire CIA, sometimes kill.

Police must be held accountable as well.

This particular girl who started the fire will not be paid. She got cash register and safe money which is supposed to be turned in.

So we will see how far she wants to take this not following rules business

Because we don't slap on the wrist this day and age.

I'll have her ass turned in myself and tell the agency to keep the 10k award.

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