#“I TRAINED myself to speak like that do you know the DISCIPLINE it TAKES?”

[callernumberthree]

one of my oldest friends told me a few months ago that when I first told them my pronouns were she/they they thought that it was like. grammatically in that order. like they had to say "she ordered the food. those fries are theirs. she took a vacation. their mom was missing them" and if they didn't say it like that I would shoot them dead

#theyre very cool #and very lovely #i burst out cackling when they told me this #after I explained it to them they were SO frustrated because #“I TRAINED myself to speak like that do you know the DISCIPLINE it TAKES?” #LMFAOOOO #sorry <3 that's funny #she/they

[just-some-random-blogger]

Safe Keeping | 6

Part 1 2 3 4 5 6 7

What say you, lady? Don't you think the Hound would make a fine husband? He would protect you, yes, and you would bear him many babes." I curtsy again but this time, my voice falters when I speak, "I- I think he would," I turn to my left, "Lord Sandor would make a fine husband... a fine father."

Sandor Clegane x Reader | 6k+ | cw: fem!reader, forced marriage, smut (piv, emotional sex, praise kink), enemies to lovers, slow burn, angst, emotional unavailability, emotional vulnerability, The Hound being abrasive, miscommunication, baby fever, fluff!, typos, etc.

A/N: i said i'd end this on p5 but i think i'll be ending at p7 HAHHAH lol. originally posted on ao3 but felt like posting it on here

Tagging: @otteropera @poisonsage808 @glitterandgoldfinds @the-queen-of-sorrows @minttea07 @fluffpudel @j3nn-1 @jelsasnowflakes1

"My lady," followed by high pitched barking made me turn around from where I sat in the garden.

Maester Yannick was walking over to me, with three puppies on his trail. He lifts his robe when he feels one of the critters nip at it. He hisses at them and tells them not to bite. Rose barks and takes it as a challenge.

I chuckle and shush her, raising a finger as I bend down to reinforce the discipline.

Rose looks at me then scurries off.

I straighten up on the bench as Yannick sits beside me. We both then turn to the soldiers in the making, training across the grounds of Brown Wood.

The Hound barks at them when they get their positions wrong.

"He is lovely today," Yannick tells me.

I turn to him and chuckle, but nod nonetheless.

He continues observing my husband, "he's been training long, hasn't he?"

"Mmm. Perhaps a couple hours," I look back at Sandor, "why? Do you think it is bad for his wounds?"

"I think it is bad for you," he looks at me.

I pull my head back, "me?"

The maester stands, "you are wasting precious time. Both of you are in good conditions," he links his hands together, "for the good of your house, it would be wise for you to be more... vigilant about producing heirs."

I feel my face drop and burn.

"As you know, my lady, the herbs I make for you are not cheap. It would be a shame to put them to waste due to a lack of effort."

I clear my throat and turn away from him.

Maester Yannick nods, "which reminds me, I will go and fetch you some tea right now."

I watch him walk away.

Once he was gone, my attention is averted back to Sandor. In truth, now more than ever has his hound persona been more apparent to me. Besides his fierceness, his snarling, his grit, the way he bared his teeth and howled at everyone, I could see his loyalty, his need to do good by the people in his life, his protectiveness, especially when it came to fighting, and his warmth.

I begin to think about Daisy. I turn to my side and watch as the pups begin to wreck the garden with their paws.

I find myself thinking about that night... that night when he said he loved me.

I rub my belly, not liking the way my stomach churned at my string of thoughts.

I watch as Sandor straightens up a boy, who was about to fall flat on his face, with one hand. He shakes his head at the child and says he can't fight if he's fighting himself too.

I imagine him speaking the same way to our son.

It was a horrible mistake. As quickly as I thought of it, I then remember telling him to give me a child by another woman.

I've set him free. He does not belong to me; in truth, he never did.

I quickly stand and wipe my face.

This was no longer leisure, this was torture.

I quickly run inside, retreating to my bedroom. Once I am there, I takes my shoes off, plop on my bed, and stare up at my ceiling. I look at the cobwebs in the distant corners and I wonder why I felt like crying but had no tears to shed. I lie there in silence, wishing nothing but to waste away.

I lift my head up from the sheets and turn to the door when I hear it open. I immediately stand and brush my skirts, "Sandor."

The feel of the cold floor on my bare feet send a shiver down my spine.

Sandor cautiously looks at me, "is everything alright?"

"Mmm?" I raise my brows, "what- why do you ask?"

"You ran inside and left your babes in the garden"

My lips part at his words. My hand instinctively comes to my belly.

"Pups," he raises a hand, "I meant pups. I didn't mean--"

Sandor is cut off by the voice of maester Yannick calling my name as he knocked on my door. Sandor opens the door for him and the old man enters, smiling when he sees the two of us. He is about to hand me the tea but then decides otherwise and puts it on my vanity.

He turns to Sandor, "I am pleased you decided to attend to your wife. Her fertility herbs are slowly being depleted. I was beginning to fear it would be for naught."

I grow frigid.

With that, the maester nods and exits, "please do enjoy each other's company."

The sound of the door closing leaves me red in the face. I lock eyes with Sandor then look away, clearing my throat. I flinch when he calls out my name.

I turn back and rub my arms, "yes... husband?"

"I didn't come here for that," he mutters, raising a hand cautiously.

My chest tightens. Of course not. I open my mouth, but he cuts me off before I could make a sound.

"I came to check if you're alright," he slowly steps forward.

I tense and nod, "I am well."

I feel my heart race when he takes another step towards me.

"Y-you needn't worry about me."

"I always worry about you," he mutters as he walks closer.

My words catch in my throat, "what?"

"Let me help you," he speaks, now only a few steps away from me.

My heart is pounding. I step back slowly, "h-help?"

"In the way only a man can," he lets out a heavy breath.

My calves hit the bed. I stop in my tracks and stand frozen. The Hound is now looking down at me. I am too overwhelmed by his presence to do anything else but stare.

The next thing I know, my gaze is drawn downward as he sits on the bed and peers up at my form.

"If you want a child from me," he whispers, "I'll give you one by no other woman but you." 

I look at him, heart in my mouth, body burning. I scratch my fingers and nod at his words.

Sandor sighs, "I need to hear you say it."

"I-" I shakily speak, "I want a child," I face him, "a child by you... my lord."

His brows knit.

My breath hitches when he touches my waist.

I can hear his heavy breathing as he whispers, "Sandor. Please."

I gulp as his palm rubs slowly across my belly. The action makes my skin prickle with goosebumps. My hand comes atop his. I oblige, "Sandor."

He gently tugs me in between his legs and my breath nearly escapes me. He rests his hands on my hips then pulls me in, sinking his face into my side. My ribs rattle with how quick my pulse was.

Sandor inhales deeply, "gods, you smell good."

I feel my body burn, "i-it's lavender oil."

I squeak when he pulls me down onto his lap. He cages me against him, my back flush against his chest. He sinks his face into my neck and slowly draws in a breath. His arms snake around me as he hotly speaks, "it's you, my pretty squirrel."

I feel his hands slowly lift my skirts up. My hands latch onto his arm that was still around my belly.

"Be calm, my wife, I cleaned up before coming here, in case I had to wipe your tears."

I make a sound as he knocks his nose into my jaw and exposes one of my legs to him. 

"I don't like it when you're upset."

My breath hitches, "I-I'm not upset."

"Good."

Sandor feels the goosebumps on my skin when his hand makes contact with my bare thigh. He shushes me as he rubs and kneads my flesh. I whimper and begin to squirm when his hand hikes up my inner thigh.

His fingers touch my clothed center. He breathes hotly against the pulse of my neck, "I'm going to take this off, mmm?"

I gulp and nod slowly at his words.

I maneuver with him when his hands come under my skirts to rid me of my smallclothes. He doesn't like the space that is created between us and rips me back into him. He ruts his hips into mine to add to his point.

I whine when Sandor's right hand rubs into my heat.

"Fuck," he hisses, "you've worked yourself up over nothing."

I make a louder noise when he prods his fingers into my pulsing entrance. I can feel his fingers slide with ease against my warm folds. I instinctively grip his arm when he sinks into me.

Sandor's other arm, in turn, tightens around me, "you can take it. You've taken more than my fingers, beautiful."

I whimper when he sinks another finger into me and begins to pump in and out. My breathing grows heavier and I throw my head back on his shoulder as he moves into me.

I feel his beard scratch into my neck. I feel his teeth graze lightly into my skin. His fingers languidly move in and out of me, even as I clench my thighs together. He makes no move to part them, and in truth, it doesn't hinder his movements at all.

I feel his tongue dart out on my neck, "I want to taste you."

I slowly lift my head from his shoulder just as he pulls his hand away from my thighs and brings his fingers into his mouth. I feel sobered by his action, taken aback by how filthy it was yet how eagerly he did it.

The next thing I know, he pulls back and lets my body fall in a space between his thighs. He quickly undoes his trousers. After, he pushes me onto my feet, and grips my hips. He rather impatiently rips up my skirts and I feel my thighs shake when he grips my bare flesh.

He pulls me back down on him, and I mewl when I feel his hardened length slip clumsily between my thighs, not yet entering me. I settle on him; the sensation of his clothes on my skin makes my belly roll.

"Fuck," he growls, as my thighs instinctively clamp around him. Sandor is unable to withhold the bucking of his hips.

When he does this, pleasure, crackling like embers, tingle up my body.

"Open up," he hisses, one hand coming between my legs, "I have to be inside you. I have to come inside, have to come inside your weeping cunny."

"Sandor," I whine as I slowly part my legs.

"I know, pretty squirrel. You're so worked up, for me," he breathes against my ear then nips at my lobe, "so fucking eager."

A drawn out whine escapes my lips when he sheathes himself into me.

He wastes no time in moving. I end up squeaking as he braces me against him and firmly thrusts upward into me.

My cries grow louder as his arms tighten beneath my breasts. I feel his hand knead one breast, but it doesn't last very long.

I am throttled onto my chest and pressed down on the sheets. Sandor lifted me up like I was nothing and adjusted me on the edge of the bed.

I'm barely on my tiptoes, as most of my weight was shifted on my spine from of how my husband was hoisting me up to cater to himself.

His movements quickly pick up the pace, and our position becomes reminiscent of the time he had me like this once before, only this time, his one hand was rubbing my scarred hip and he was much more vocal.

"Look at you, all bent over and mine," he groans.

I nails dig into the sheets.

"I'm gonna fill you up. You're going to be so fucking full of me."

I squeal into the sheets. The idea drives me wild. I plead into the bed but I don't think he hears it.

Just as I felt something begin to build in me, he slows.

I open my eyes, not realizing I had closed them as Sandor drops one of my hips. I squeak when I feel him grab my shoulder and slowly turn me on my back.

My jaw drops; I breathe heavily through my mouth. Sandor looks down on me as his hands grip my sides. He pushes me upward and presses my legs by my ribs

He slowly thrusts into me, hands working their way across my body. He rubs my thighs, my belly, my breasts. His brows furrow, "fuck. So fucking soft and warm."

He massages my breasts then works his way up to my shoulders. His one hand rubs my neck before clutching my jaw. His other hand slides back down my hips. I whine when his thumb rubs circles around my sensitive nub. It makes my toes curl.

He sighs, "so fucking beautiful."

I whimper when his other thumb swipes my lips. I find myself licking at it. It makes him groan and buck into me faster.

I push my head back and arch my spine, "fuck- Sandor."

Both his hands land on my hips. He digs his nails into my flesh and begins to move deeper. Eventually, he sinks one hand down by the side of my head for support. My hands latch onto his hips.

"Come for me, pretty girl," he groans, "I'm not gonna last much longer."

I tug at his clothes.

"Be a good girl and come all over my cock, mmm. I want to feel you tighten around me-- get all messy and wet and loud and," he gives deliberate thrusts, "so fucking beautiful."

I whine, "Sandor, I want- I want to-"

I begin to tighten and shake against him. My legs wrap around him and my hands cling onto him for dear life. I find it futile to conceal my sounds, as I cannot find the strength to shut my mouth as I ride the feeling of bliss.

With a loud cuss, Sandor rams into me as deeply as he can. His movements are rough and slow. Both of his hands secured on my waist as he spills his seed into me.

I can feel him throb and can feel myself dripping with warmth.

Sandor takes his time, really drawing out the feeling before slowly coming to a halt. He lets out a final moan when he does stop then takes a deep breath.

I look at him as he closes his eyes and straightens up. My body burns when he looks down at me through hooded eyes and rubs my body again. He enjoys rubbing my breasts the most.

My hands come to his arms, and that seems to stop him.

I am about to tell him not to stop, but he speaks before I can, "wrap your legs round me."

In truth, I didn't have to do anything as he wraps my legs around himself and picks me up in his arms. I hook my feet around each other and am careful not to touch his blistered back as my hands go to his shoulders.

Sandor crawls up the bed with me clinging onto him; I feel the strength in his muscles as he moves. He sets me down on the pillows. He arranges one under my head and brings one beside me.

He looks at me for a moment then whispers, "I'm going to pull away now."

He waits for me to respond before doing anything.

In truth, the thought of him pulling away from me makes my body ache with sadness, but I slowly nod anyway.

I close my eyes as Sandor gently draws away from me. My emotions immediately overcome me in my vulnerable state. I rub my eyes when I feel tears build behind my lids. Sandor fixes my skirt and gathers my legs together. I feel him take the pillow beside me and stuff if bellow my bum.

"This will help keep my spend from dripping out."

His explanation makes my body burn.

I feel Sandor shuffle beside the bed and I hear him fixing his clothing.

I clench my jaw, dreading what I knew exactly was to come next.

I open my eyes when he calls my name. I look at him pathetically, noticing how his skin glowed with sweat, the last evidence that he was ever in me beyond his untucked shirt.

He reaches out to me and I really don't want to take his hand knowing he'll leave me after, so I don't.

I have no idea why he still grabs my hand. The action feels like a betrayal. He rubs my knuckles before kissing them. I chew my lip, feeling wronged over the fact he has never kissed my lips and probably never will.

"I will be leaving now," he mutters.

His words gut me, as always. 

I rip my hand out of his and turn away from him, "very well."

Sandor knits his brows at the sharp withdrawal. He was gentle was he not? Still, he's being turned away.

His mouth goes dry. He slowly steps back, "I..."

I turn my body away from him. I draw in a deep breath and try to make my voice as even as possible, "thank you, Sandor."

Sandor flinches. He steps back some more, "I-I'll bring your dogs here for company."

I chuckle dryly. Company. My voice breaks, "I'm tired."

Sandor's mouth twitches. He backs all the way up to the door, "I'll let you rest then."

I cover my face with my arm and hum in agreement, not trusting myself to speak anymore.

The moment I hear the click of the door, I begin to sob. I whine as his words replay in my head. How could he tell me such things, call me beautiful and say he wants me, then leave me right after? How could he touch me like that then want nothing to do with me?

I pull the pillow from underneath my head and wail into it.

Sandor, who couldn't find it in himself to step away from the door, decides not to walk back in when he hears the crying. His belly curdles with self-loathing. He feels like he's going to choke because of how hurt the noise sounded, nevermind how lovely it was seconds ago; it meant for nothing.

He walks away trying to figure out where he went wrong. He relives every touch, every sound in his memory. His eyes water when he comes to the dreadful realization it must have been horrible being with him. He forced his wretched looks onto an unwilling witness.

He gulps as he sniffles and wipes his face in frustration. He feels like walking into the forest, never to be seen again, but then he steps out to the garden and hears small barking sounds. He looks at the three pups, playing with the boys, who should have been training, and feels his heart twist.

He finds himself imagining what the scene would've been like if Daisy was here... if his pretty squirrel-- he shuts the thought away.

I knock on Sandor's office door and enter when he tells me to come in.

He looks up, does a double take, then immediately stops doing whatever it was he was doing. He clears his throat, "Lady Clegane."

His words pierce through me. He's never called me that before. I close the door and walk towards him, "Lord husband. Good morrow to you. Where is Andrew?"

His shoulders tense, "he... should be here any minute."

I nod as I halt in front of his desk, "he has gotten good enough at reading and balancing coin, I hope?"

Sandor sighs, "yes."

I notice the crumbs on his beard, then I notice a plate on his desk. He must have broken fast here. I fidget with my fingers and wipe my chin, hoping he would get the message. He doesn't. I decide not to note on it and simply get to the point, "maester Yannick said your wounds have dried up, and that if you liked, you could go on your rounds again."

Sandor nods and straightens in his chair, "I think I'll start once I'm confident in the bloke balancing our coin."

I nod slowly and link my hands together, "alright," I shift in my spot and turn to the door.

I look back at him and feel my body burn under his scrutiny. I offer a smile, "that is all I wanted to say," I rub my hands together, "-wanted to check on you."

I gasp when he jumps out of his chair.

I clutch my chest and stare at him. He had an arm raised and reached out to me. It dawns on me he said something but it was too quick for me to catch.

I release a breath, "pardon?"

Sandor lowers his hand, rolls his shoulders back, and clears his throat, "I... I asked how you're doing."

It takes me a few moments to realize the meaning of his words. I shift and my spot and rub my chest. I feel my neck burn when he further clarifies his question.

"Yesterday, when we... bedded, I didn't hurt you, did I?"

I draw out a deep breath and smile softly, "you were... gentle with your touches."

Sandor is unsatisfied.

I aimlessly look around, "and, anyway, I am not as fragile as you think."

He purses his lips and tilts his head. He takes a moment before speaking, and when he does, he does so hesitantly, "I was afraid I made my pretty wife weep again."

I instinctively let out a laugh, but it was clearly unamused and pained. I feel like I was being scorched alive when I look at him looking at me. I shake my hands, suddenly in denial, "no, I was quite satisfied!"

Sandor's eyes widen a fraction.

Fuck. Fuck. Shit. Fuck. What am I saying?

He blinks twice and wipes his mouth. Finally his crumbs fall off. He mutters, "that's... good."

I release my final chuckle. He turns to his desk, fixes some things, then looks back to me. He looks like he means to smile but he doesn't, "I'm glad."

He slowly sits down afterwards.

I feel like I'm being weighed down by anchor.

That was it. That was the conversation.

Sandor is no longer looking at me. He shuffles the paper into a file and I slowly begin to feel the air around us thicken.

He sets the parchment down and darts his eyes to me. He purses his lips again and I catch the way his face twitches. He opens his mouth and slowly points to the door, "if that's all... I would not keep you."

I don't know why I laugh again, but I do. It's not even funny. I feel like being stabbed would have been better, more amusing at this point. I curtsy at him and shuffle backwards, "of course. I do not mean to keep you either."

Sandor feels sick. He clenches his fists and turns to his desk. He breathes in deeply, trying not to rile himself up any more than he already was. Gods knew he would use all his strength to keep this room locked.

I walk towards the door and turn the knob. I feel a wave of tears threatening to spill, and I slap my mouth when a squeak leaves me.

Sandor is immediately alerted. He looks up and pushes himself on the edge of the seat, "what?"

I turn to the ground and wipe my face. I take two seconds for myself then turn to him. I cover up with a chuckle, "I said... y-your beard."

Sandor immediately rubs his beard.

I chuckle louder, trying to convince myself that I actually found it funny, "you have crumbs on your beard."

Sandor looks at me like I grew another head.

I laugh enough that I actually start laughing at myself.

When I stop, the silence is loud.

Sandor clears his throat and cautiously asks, "you find that funny?"

My stomach drops when I see the red tinge of his ears. I walk up to his side and shake my head, "wait, no- I- I didn't mean it like that."

Sandor shakes his head and offers me a quick and small smile, "it's fine. I just wasn't expecting that from you," he looks back to his desk, "anyway, I'm used to it."

I feel like my entrails were being grinded.

A line forms in his brows, "I don't think I've ever heard you laugh before."

"I wasn't laughing at you!" I whimper under my breath. The air in my lungs begin to catch in my throat as I exhale, "I was just- I ju-"

Sandor turns to me, face slipping when he catches my teary eyes.

He stands and takes my shoulders.

I blink my tears away and smile in an attempt to calm myself. I am glad I do not shed a tear. I speak through a loud breath, "I'm just nervous when I'm around you!"

Sandor immediately releases me. He sighs through his nostrils, "scared, you mean."

I shake my head and take his shoulders, "nervous."

The Hound seizes up like there was a knife to his neck. I take a moment to look at him and pull back.

I cannot deny it hurt when he immediately steps away from me.

I really should have left at this point, but my mouth had a mind of its own. I furrow my brows and give him an earnest look, "I can trim your beard for you."

He steps back one last time, then looks at me as if I now had three heads.

I realize my mistake, "if-if you want me to. I'm not saying you should, I'm just offering to-"

"You want to do that for me?"

I turn to stone. I look around nervously, "mmm... o-only if you'd have it... ... my lord."

Sandor's face twitches. He sighs and slumps forward. He furrows his brows, "you'd be staring at my face the whole time."

I watch him as he rummages through his things.

My stomach rolls again and I step back, "ah... I see."

Sandor stops to look at me.

"If you do not feel comfortable, I will not..."

My words run dry when he pulls out shears. I watch him as he straightens up. He grips the tool in his hand, "it's you I'm worried about."

I look up at him, not knowing what to say.

"I don't mean to scare yo-"

"I'm not scared of you," I mutter.

Sandor stares at me. After a moment, he slowly takes my hand and hands me the shears, "maybe you should be."

My chest pounds at fleeting touch.

I cut his beard in the garden, as I didn't want to make a mess in his office.

He sits on the bench there.

The breeze blows at both our hair.

"You needn't touch me so gently, girl," he says, "it will take a lot of you to hurt me."

I do not change the manner in which I touch his cheek. I can feel Sandor looking at me, but I do not avert my attention away from his beard, "just because you do not hurt easily doesn't mean I cannot be gentle with you, Hound."

The Hound reaches out to my thighs when my foot rolls on a rock. I barely even fidget, but, still, he holds me in place to keep me from a potential fall. He does not release me. I gulp when I feel his thumb rub my skirt.

"You can hurt me if you like," he says.

I pull back and furrow my brows, "would you like that?"

He grinds his lower lip in his teeth. He debates for a moment and I decide to snip his mustache. I shush him when he tries to speak. He purses his lips tightly.

A moment passes with just the sound of cutting.

"I wouldn't want to cut your lips off," I shift in front of him, still ever so aware of his touch of my thighs, "you still need them to kiss."

I pull away to check if his mustache was straight. I notice his expression, dumbfounded, and continue snipping. I sigh, "that was a jest."

I pull away and again and move to the other side. Sandor still keeps his hands on me. He looks at me as I gently move his head.

I add, "I'm quite funny actually."

He chuckles lowly.

It makes my heart flutter.

He smiles, "oh, I don't doubt it, little girl."

I flatten my lips into a line, unsure if he was serious or not. I trim the hair by his jaw.

"You must like kissing then."

I freeze in my spot. I stop what I was doing, then continue, "what do you mean?"

He pulls his hands away. I watch him link them together and rest them on his lap. He shrugs, "you thought of kissing."

"Do you like kissing?"

I place a hand on my hip. He turns to me and shrugs again, "s'fine."

I furrow my brows and mimic his shrug, "well, you've never kissed me, so I wouldn't really know, would I?"

"You've never kissed a man before?"

"No," I impatiently respond, "I've kissed you, but you did not kiss me back," I take a few last cuts off his beard, "on our wedding day, remember?"

I see Sandor's look of disbelief when I finish and brush him off. Specks of hair fly off with the wind.

"You never kissed a little lord in secret as a little girl?"

"Only a big lord," I make a face, "as according to you I still am a little girl."

He stands from where he sat and peers down at me.

I purse my lips and cross my arms. I shrug, "point taken."

His brown eyes glimmer with confusion. I find myself raising my brows. Just as he is about to speak-

"MILORD, MILADY!"

We turn to the three young men walking over to us. I recognize them as Sandor's training apprentices. They push each other as I turn and smile at them.

"Good morn', lady!" Harry says, bowing exaggeratedly at me, "your dress is very rambunctious."

I furrow my brows at his words and find myself chuckling, "uhhh, thank you?"

Sandor raises his brows and curls his lips.

Daniel slaps Harry behind the head, "YOU MUG, D'YA KNOW WHAT YOU SAID, EVEN?"

Harry hisses and shoves Daniel, "DON'T HIT ME!"

Daniel gets shoved again when he incidentally elbows Richard, "OI, WATCH IT!"

The boys begin to quarrel. 

I step back before they can accidentally hit me, in turn, knocking my back into Sandor's.

"Enough!" the Hound barks, making the three brothers, or at least they acted like that, stop and turn to him.

My eyes widen at the sound of the Hound telling the boys off. I watch each of them tense as their Lord Clegane goes on a whole speech about biting off more than they can chew, and that, "if you lot want to act all tough around me, know I'll knock all three of your egg-heads with my hands tied."

I turn to the Hound, "Sandor."

He lets out a deep breath then eyes the three before him, "fuck off."

The boys immediately scram.

I bend over and grip my hips as I catch my breath. Lucy laughs at me as she beckons the puppies over with a stick. They come running over then she throws the stick for them to chase.

I huff, "these pups will be the death of me."

Lucy snorts, "and here I thought you wanted children."

I glare at her as the three small dark furred creatures begin to chase her around the garden as she runs. I call out in offence, "I do!"

Lucy runs over to me, "well, don't you know babes are far worse that this!" 

She giggles when she grabs my shoulders and uses me as a shield for the dogs. Though I was still winded, I laugh with her as the puppies prance around me. I grab Lucy's arm and begin to wrangle with her, "at least my babes will learn to speak. These pups know no sense!"

Lucy pushes me forward, encouraging me, "no, no, go on, s'your time to run, milady!"

I whine, "I really can't, Lucy."

"Oh, come on, lovie, you used to be full of energy! You're actin' as old as maester Yannick."

I hold back a laugh and shoot Lucy a look.

She shoots one back, "what? Did I lie?"

"Girls."

Lucy and I stop and turn to whom spoke. Sandor looks at us the way he always did, scrutinizing and serious.

I straighten up and nod in regard, "my lord."

Sandor sighs and looks away with annoyance. Wind blows his hair, adding effect to his expression. He looks down when the puppies begin to run towards him. They stand on their hind legs, pant, and bark. I swear I saw his exterior break into fondness.

But then he looks at me and it's all gone, "this came for you." He holds out a letter to me between his fingers, "I don't recognize the house sigil."

I walk up to him, smoothening my skirt out, then take the letter. I look at the wax seal for only a second then open the letter.

Sandor watches me raise my brows. He chuckles.

Lucy watches Sandor smile softly before purposefully frowning.

I look up at my husband, "it's from house Alistair."

Sandor's face scrunches up, "never heard of it."

I huff and delay my response to stop the puppies from chewing at the Hound's trousers. Sandor watches as I do this and gently shakes the puppies away. He takes my arm, preventing me from bending down, "I don't mind. They're just pups."

I give him a look, "if I don't stop them now when they're tiny, nothing will stop them when they're big."

Sandor watches as I sternly tell off the puppies and shoo them away. He chuckles at it, but then freezes when Lucy chuckles as well. The two make eye contact. Sandor doesn't have time to react.

"Cedric."

He turns to me, face contorting, "what?"

The puppies run off and Lucy runs along with them. I continue to explain, "Cedric is from House Alistair. You know, the lord that gave us a place to stay. You called him pretty bo-"

"I remember the fucker," he snaps.

I tense.

The Hound's nostrils flare, "what does he want?"

Suddenly, the letter in my hand feels heavy. I shrug, "he's invited us to his nameday celebration."

Sandor scoffs, "you mean he's invited you."

I release a frustrated huff when he begins to walk away. I follow after him and open the letter. I clear my throat and read aloud, "Fair greetings to Brown Wood, the home of House Clegane. May this letter find you in good spirits and health."

Sandor rolls his eyes as he walks back inside. He makes no haste, but I do, in order to keep up with him. I continue, "Seven days from now, I, Cedric Alistair, will be celebrating my--"

"I don't fucking care, little girl," he stops in his tracks and turns to me.

I nearly collide with him, but I gladly don't. I purse my lips and continue anyway, skipping to the part that holds my point, "if the Lord and Lady Clegane be so courteous in taking time out of their day to attend my feast, I would gladly-"

"Do you want to go, squirrel?"

I look up at him, blinking at the sight of his stern expression. I have to say, the omission of the word pretty for his petname made it feel... wrong. I clutch the letter by my belly, "he hosted us, me, Lucy... Daisy, even you, when we had nowhere to go. I think it only proper to attend his nameday to show appreciation and respect."

Sandor's eye twitches. He looks away and sighs.

I chew my lower lip, "he was kind to us, Sandor. I only mean to-"

"Fine," he cuts me off, "but if he touches you," he walks off, "I'm going to kill him."

His statement make my stomach churn. I cannot for the life of me understand what the intent of his words are. I chase after him again, "what if he asks me to dance with him?"

Sandor chuckles dryly, "a fine reason to chop him up."

He stops when I grab his arm. He looks at my hand on his bicep then gives me a look as I say, "you cannot kill him."

Sandor places his hand atop mine, "then don't fucking dance with him."

He squeezes my hand but it is not rough at all. It's gentle and extremely warm. He doesn't even try to pry my grip off, in fact, it's like he was tightening it on hm. My lips part and my body begins to burn.

I then realize when he was close enough for me to feel his breathing that he had been leaning in. I catch the way his eyes dart down to my mouth. I find myself slowly pressing my lips together.

I close my eyes when Sandor comes close to my cheek. I swear I felt my heart leap into my mouth when he pressed his face against mine.

He draws in a deep breath then sighs, "have you ever seen a hound share?"

The silence between us is deafening.

"Hmm?" he hums.

I open my mouth but nothing but mindless sounds leave me.

"I don't even think your pups do that."

My breath catches in my throat when he I feel his beard and his lips press gently against the crook of my neck.

Then the next moment, he releases me and pulls away like nothing happened.

We stare at each other for the longest second of my life. I feel like I'm on fire. What's worse is that I don't think he realizes just how affected I am, or actually... maybe it was good he couldn't tell I was dying inside.

"Still," he nods, "a dog is a dog and I will do as my master commands."

I feel light headed when he walks away.

I clutch my belly and walk to the nearest surface for support. I rub my neck, wondering if that really just happened.

#sandor clegane #sandor clegane fanfic #the hound #the hound fanfic #sandor clegane x reader #sandor the hound clegane #sandor fluff #sandor x reader #sandor fanfic #sandor clegane smut #sandor clegane fic #sandor clegane x you #sandor clegane fluff #sandor fic #game of thrones #game of thrones fic #sandor smut #game of thrones fanfic #sandor clegane angst #sandor angst

[octuscle]

I'm on a flight to Tokyo, and I'm definitely going to stand out amongst the locals... what should I do?

I always have the greatest respect for visits to Asian countries myself. So it's more than natural that you need support. I myself have had very good experiences with a preset that I am sending you. I recommend that you activate the preset as soon as possible, the transformation is set to last 12 hours.

Okay, it's exemplary that you had your cell phone in flight mode, so the message only reaches you after the plane is already on the tarmac on its way to the terminal. With your seatbelt still fastened, you activate the default setting. After the first few seconds, the first effect becomes apparent. The tension is gone. This is not the first time you have landed in Haneda. Only tourists and fools jump up and open the luggage compartments before the seatbelt signs have gone out. You are disciplined. Discipline is the only way to survive a juggernaut like Tokyo. You know that. The idiots around you don't.

You say goodbye to the person sitting next to you. You say goodbye to the flight crew when you leave the plane. In broken Japanese. You struggle with the language. Even though you've been learning it for over a year. At least you recognize a few of the characters at the airport. At least you can understand fragments of the conversations around you. And you know your way around the airport. Even if you're not the first to jump on, you're one of the first at the baggage carousel. It pays to have a Japanese ID card. Wait a minute! A Japanese ID card? Sure, you've been living here for years. Tokyo is your second home. Naturalization was only logical. You have a Japanese great-grandmother. That made it easier. You inherited your black hair from her.

You look at the people with the big suitcases with pity. They're either going to waste a fortune on cabs now. Or they'll have real problems on the train during rush hour. You've packed efficiently. And your advantage is that you stand out from the crowd. 190 cm… That makes you a giant in Japan. And a colossus at 120 kg. When you finally take the steps from the subway into the open air, the default setting has already been active for three hours. You walk the last few meters to your hotel. It's so nice to be back here. Yes, you actually live in London. But you spend as much time as you can in Tokyo for business and pleasure. For years now. You speak the language very well, you're up to date with all the fashions and gossip. And a regular guest here at the hotel. The concierge addresses you by name. You greet him back by name. Nevertheless, you exchange business cards. Tradition is tradition. The building trembles. A slight earthquake.You don't know how many earthquakes this is in your life. It's not even worth mentioning in your conversation.

Now a quick bowl of noodle soup. And then to the gym. You've spent too much time motionless on the plane and in the subway. You need action now. The feeling that your body has given its last. And then a hot bath and a massage. Your buddy at reception has already arranged everything. You just quickly take your luggage upstairs and get changed. And then you run down the stairs to the gym. The earth has just shaken a little again. The last thing you need now is to get stuck in the elevator.

Two hours later, when Atsushi presses his elbows into your back, all is right with the world again. Atsushi is a master of his trade. And you've known each other for ages. In fact, you played baseball in the same club as children before you moved to Europe with your parents. It was a real coincidence when you found each other on one of your visits here on Grindr. It's one of the biggest and hardest reasons why you're staying here at the hotel. Rarely have you experienced a better masseur who is both good for your back and offers a first-class happy ending. He stands behind you and massages your neck. And his hard-on sticks out in front of your face. Shit, if he doesn't suck you off right away, you'll cum without him laying a hand on you.

You two spend the evening at karaoke. Unfortunately, Asushi can't stay in your hotel room tonight. But he will take you upstairs. And you fuck him as a thank you. Asushi thanks you with a deep kiss goodbye. He says that your education in Europe has paid off. Nobody fucks like real Japanese men who learned to fuck in Paris. You grin. Well. An almost real Japanese man. Your one grandmother was English. You owe your blue eyes to her.

Get up, go to the gym, take a hot bath. That's how your next morning starts. Not easy with the jet lag. But you have to get back into the rhythm of the city of your ancestors quickly. The first meeting is at 07:30. Time is money. And life in Tokyo is not cheap. "それで、侍よ？よく眠れましたか？" Asushi sent a picture of his morning wood. You return the favor with a selfie, freshly showered. "よく眠れたよ！しかし、私には硬いものと柔らかいものがある。疲れ果てた夜に備えよ," you reply. "はい、侍よ！" You're looking forward to the end of the day!

#male tf #muscle tf #reality change #chronivac #inked man #race change

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Crewel wagging his baton at Rollo. "Hmph. I heard you excel in potionology. A shame you have chosen not to take my alchemy course."

THE WAY ROLLO PROBABLY DOESN'T WANT TO DO ALCHEMY BECAUSE HE REFUSES TO RAISE HIS BUDDY LEVELS WITH MALLEUS, IDIA, AND AZUL 😭 When Rollo's passive aggressiveness spills over into the gameplay...

Like Fire, Hellfire.

“Hah!” Crewel’s laugh was a dry bark. “To think that Trein-sensei and even Vargas-sensei have the opportunity to train you… I’m left feeling like an abandoned puppy on the side of the road.”

"Divus-sensei." Rollo politely bowed his head in reverence. "I apologize, I mean you no disrespect. I'm certain that you are a knowledgeable expert and instructor—I would have loved being under your tutelage."

A truth, white as snow.

He was nothing if not sincere to the man in the striped fur coat. Though the professor was a mage, Rollo would be lying if he claimed no respect for academics. They had some modicum of sense, sullied by the sin they practiced.

I call that a shame, he thought bitterly.

"That begs the question of why." Crewel curled a blood red glove against his chin. His eyes were sharp and discerning.

“Why, sir?” Rollo imperceptibly tensed.

"Why you chose to not enroll in my class. You enjoy Alchemy, correct? Your professors at Noble Bell College all speak highly of your abilities in the lab, even going so far as being involved independent research projects. All the factors indicate you should have been chomping at the bit to engage with my coursework.”

"... Sadly, it did not fit in with my schedule."

A lie, black as night.

Rollo’s stomach clenched at the thought of it—of being trapped in a room with the intoxicating potion fumes, forced to collaborate with heathens. It was a recipe for disaster, for his patience to fail and for his temper to spill over.

The corner of Crewel’s mouth quirked in amusement. “Exceptions can be made. The headmaster could have played around to ensure it fit—especially for a skilled young mage like yourself.”

“Please, I am worthy of no such praise.” Rollo clasped his hands together, one over the ring upon his right. “You must hold your own pupils to high expectations as well.”

“Hmm.”

His baton tapping patiently against his thigh, Crewel quietly assessed the student from the Shaftlands. Everything about him was careful and coordinated: looks, manners, words, actions. Perfect, almost like pure white or pitch black—but adults knew things, and one of those things was that there was no such thing as perfection.

“I can see that you’re of a humble breed, Flamme.” Crewel placed a hand on his shoulder, giving a quick pat. "However, I know a dog on a leash when I see one."

Confusion briefly flashed on Rollo’s face. “I’m afraid I don’t understand what you mean.”

“You’re a disciplined pup, but a restrained one—you aren’t realizing your full potential. You’re holding yourself back from doing what you really want: to let loose and to test your limits.”

Rollo’s eyes widened, repulsion lancing him.

He, desiring to openly revel in the devilry called magic? The man had it all wrong, had fallen for his controlled facade.

Perfect student, perfect boy. A paragon in pure white.

“I was a loose cannon myself back in the day,” Crewel continued, “A bad boy, a troublemaker, for the teachers to tame.”

“But you’re a teacher yourself now.”

“Yes, I’ve been trained well as you can see. That is also why I’ve got an eye for spotting those similar to myself.”

“What…” Rollo fumbled for his words. “Are you, as an instructor, encouraging disobedience and rebellion of your students?!”

“No, not exactly. However, a puppy won’t grow into a fine dog if they’re not granted the opportunity to go wild and experience what the world has to offer them. As the master of this litter of pups, it is also my responsibility to that through.”

Crewel smiled wickedly with his teeth, his canines pointed like some beast’s. A piece of his old self slipping through his well-groomed persona. Something gritty and dark.

Rollo shivered. He didn’t like that look.

“Go wild. Live a little—so long as you don’t cause your teachers any trouble.”

Give’m hell, pup.

#twst #twisted wonderland #Rollo Flamme #Divus Crewel #twst interactions #twisted wonderland interactions #disney twisted wonderland #Rollo at the Writing Desk #idt Crewel knows what he’s fueling here

[sillydumbdoll]

The theme of your last few posts is clear, dolls need to be used. Rank these uses from most to least exciting with a little explanation for your favourites:

Ornamentation - dolls can be used just by being dressed up and left in the corner of the room. A pretty doll in a cute outfit makes people smile.

Sadism - dolls can be decorated with marks too, whether it's a bruised cheek, cuts from removing clothing with a knife, or cane marks running down the back of the thighs. A well trained doll can take anything with barely a sound.

Gratification - dolls are always eager to please, and a good doll can be altered to fit any fantasy an owner likes. A shy schoolgirl, an eager kitty, or the helpless captive that weakly tries to resist.

Training - the act of training a doll can be rewarding in and of itself, dolls are blank slates that can be built upon and wiped clean over and over.

Breaking - turning a captive into a good doll can be more work than simply training an already-eager plaything, but can also be even more rewarding. Depriving a captive of privacy, dignity, and comfory before reintroducing them as rewards for good behaviour can be wonderful when results begin to show.

Entertainment - what good is a doll that's kept shut away where nobody can appreciate it? Dolls can be a prized possession to show off to friends or made into a centrepiece at a party.

Alteration - what makes a doll different from a submissive? You can't take a submissive to a tattoo parlour on a whim and get "Fucktoy" in pretty cursive letters across the back of their thigh. If you want your doll to have bigger breasts, softer lips, or be unable to ever speak again, those are all options!

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG I WANT AN OWNER WHO WILL DO ALL OF THIS TO ME!!! I wanna be a good dolly like this!!!

1. Gratification !!! It’s no surprise that I like to be a moldable dolly that is able to be dressed and used however in whatever scenario or role my owner wants me in!! I like to be the ultimate fantasy, the perfect doll can be put in any situation and play the role perfectly🩷

2. Entertainment — I’m an attention whore!! I think we all know that by now :) Being the center of attention at a party is a dream of mine🩷 I want to be good enough to show off! That will be my reward for being such a good dolly!!

3. Breaking !!! While I like to think of myself as an obedient doll, I sometimes get in moods where I don’t even like being a doll :( I wouldn’t say I’m bratty, just a little resistant to the idea of having to submit all the time, it’s the switch in me🤭 But if I was broken, I would be able to enjoy being a good doll all the time!! 🩷

4. Ornamentation🩷 I want to be shown off just because I’m pretty, untouched and shown off like a pretty prized possession, an expensive pretty decoration to be admired :)

5. Training 🩷🩷 I would love doll training! I’d like to think I’d be a good doll, but I know how resistant I get and how hard it is to get me in the headspace…I need to be better but I have no self discipline

6. Sadism — I love this one, but it can be scary! It’s one of my main fantasies for someone to be sadistic with me BUT it’s so scary because I’m an easily scared sensitive sweet girl 😖 That also means I cry easily….if ur into that 😘

7. Alteration — I think abt this one SOMETIMES when I’m in a rare mood but I’m still into it… it’s just newer for me and also scariest!!! 😣

#bd/sm community #dollification #doll kink #bimbo doll #bd/sm blog #free use doll #bimbo training #bd/sm kink #corruption kink #k1nk blog #bd/sm corruption #bd/sm training #kidnapping k1nk #cnc kidnapping #kidnap roleplay #kidnap fantasy

[blakeswritingimagines]

Love Stinks

Summary: Daemon coming across you training wasn't done on purpose at least not until he took you under his wing, working closely together can cause feelings to rise good or bad.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the House of The Dragon/Fire & Blood characters nor do I claim to own them. I do not own any of the images used nor do I claim to own them.

Word count: 5.2k

You had been learning how to fight the best you could since you were young even when you practiced with other people wanting to learn as much as possible so you might one day be the best, keeping the dream of being the best swordsman in all of Westeros no matter how tired or sore your body became you were always up early and practicing as if nothing else mattered in your world. Daemon raised his brow at your intense training, he'd caught wind of your skill but seeing it first hand was even more impressive. "Good, keep it up and no man can defeat you." He said with a smile, it was always a good thing to see a young person take pride in their learning and skill. "How did I hear tell of your skill as a swordsman?" He chuckled, his own skills were nothing to scoff at.

You were softly panting as you stopped and looked over your shoulder at the voice only to be shocked as you met eye with the rouge prince, smiling brightly at his words as you stood up straight and nodded your head feeling hopeful that he was right. Biting down on your lower lip as you looked down at the ground at his next choice of words and slightly shrugged but couldn't contain your wide grin as you glanced back up at him "I've taken on many men much larger then myself....and won." Daemon could hardly hold back a proud smile, there stood before him was one to watch as you grew older. You had the tenacity a great fighter would have and the discipline to match. "Excellent," His tone was soft, he spoke as if he were a mentor giving his young student the praise they deserved. "What's your name little one?"

Letting out a breath as you took in the small bit of praise he gave you and enjoyed it, since you were often met with rude judging people who didn't think you could pull it off and actually become a swordwoman like you dreamed of. Giving him a respectful bow before meeting his eye once more as you stood tall and proudly after putting your sword away then spoke without realizing how much was going to change for you "Y/n your grace." "Y/n it is then." Daemon chuckled, he had not expected such a pleasant surprise today. He wondered just how far you would go if these were just your early days. You had an infectious energy about you that made it hard not to like, perhaps he needed to find you a mentor so you could truly hone the skill he had found so promising. "You have great potential, do you wish to become the best there is?".

You smiled having thought it would be daunting if you ever had to speak with one of the royals but found talking to him to be quite easy, letting your jaw drop slightly at his words as if your breath got caught in your throat before you smiled brightly and quickly nodded your head not knowing just how hard he would push you "Yes of course it's my dream to become the best." He smirked at your ambition, you looked so much like a younger version of Daemon himself right now. The determination and fire in your eyes would push you forward no matter what obstacles found their way in front of you. He wondered what his brother would say if he asked him about taking you as a ward.

Daemon's smile brightened, he could not help but be warmed by your attitude. "I believe I may have someone that could help you on that journey if you're willing." He offered with a nod. "Although," He added as a caution as you both laughed. "He's certainly not going to hold your hand." There was an implied fondness within the words however, Daemon enjoyed those who were so determined to reach their goals. You felt excited that he knew of someone who could help you even though you didn't know the person he was talking about was himself, smiling at him as you listened closely only to shake your head as you was filled with hope and determination "That's fine nobody has since learning I've wanted this, I can take it I know it."

"Perfect then." Daemon nodded with satisfaction, he hadn't met many others like you, your determination and resolve to be the best made sure of that. "There is one other thing though." Daemon added with his hands clasped together in front of him. "If I am ever to teach you, you must drop the title when speaking with me." He smiled as though he were sharing an inside joke, there was no need for royal titles when you both were alone.

Smiling happily that he would show you more than you could ever dream of learning from anyone not even just the rouge prince, nodding your head in understanding as you looked up at him tilting your head slightly before grinning as you nodded once more "You got it...Daemon." Daemon nodded in response, he wasn't used to being called by his first name. But with you he was able to let his guard down a little, you may have the talent to become the best swordsman in the realm. "Perfect." Daemon smiled, he was looking forward to teaching you. He would certainly teach you the fighting style he himself had developed too. You were too promising to teach the standard way of fighting.

After a few days passed by of learning whatever Daemon passed on you took to everything as quickly as you could, not quite still fully understanding just how hard he was going to be pushing even as he had you do exercises or sparring with him until you couldn't breath or feel your body anymore. But you couldn't stop yourself from enjoying how nice it was talking with him outside of practice as well as learning what he was like as a person and a fighter himself. As some of your lessons passed Daemon couldn't help but be impressed by your skills. To see such improvement so quickly was something to be respected. "You're catching on quickly." He gave you praise as you both finished off your latest session of training, he was glad to have you as his student. You certainly were not the usual student, his lessons were often brutal and unforgiving. He almost felt bad doing the same to you. Almost. "How's the training treating you?" Daemon inquired with that ever present soft demeanor.

You were panting heavily as you tried to catch your breath before allowing your body to drop onto the training grounds with a small huff, closing your eyes as your chest rose and dropped quickly even as you heard his question as you peeked an eye open looking at him ready to answer only to sit up slightly as you threw up before lowering your head again and spoke hoarsely as you used your sleeve to wipe your mouth "Everything I've ever dreamed of." Daemon's eyes widened at your sudden sickness, his concern was quickly replaced by slight amusement. "You weren't expecting quite the push as you've had so far it seems." He couldn't help but be amused by the look on your face, clearly you weren't able to handle his training, yet. "Give yourself a moment to catch your breath, and we'll continue when you are done." Daemon offered, although he still couldn't help but chuckle to himself over the sight.

Taking a few more moments for yourself as you listened to him as you quickly shook your head but still happy you were learning all you could, slowly standing back up as you grabbed your sword not giving yourself a moment to fully relax as you nodded your head toward him not wanting to lose your momentum as you slowly swung your sword looking up at him "Now." Daemon smiled as he saw your eagerness to continue, despite throwing up you were more than willing to get back to work. "Very well then." He didn't waste time as he took up his own blade. "We'll start with a few basics, let me see what you've picked up in the last few days." Daemon raised his blade, his expression was hard to read. "Come on now, give me your best." Daemon's tone was still soft, although it carried an intensity to it.

You tightened your grip on the sword in your hand as your breathing was still slowing down, nodding your head at his words knowing you would push yourself as much as you possibly could before watching him closely as you nodded your head once he gave the okay to start practicing again which you did as you started slow before you started picking up your pace. Daemon's soft smile grew as you began swinging your sword with ever more confidence. Your speed was impressive as it picked up, there was a fluidity to the way your sword moved that impressed him. "Good." He nodded in approval, you had a lot of potential that he would make sure was realized. "That's the attitude you need when we fight." Daemon swung his blade in response, going for your unprotected flank.

You had a soft smile at the small bit of praise before bending over once his blade hit your side roughly, taking a quick deep breath as you knew it would darken into a harsh bruise much like all the other times before you started swinging again as you did your best to focus having slowly been learning how to fight against him. Daemon was impressed by your courage as he watched you continue on despite the bruise you were sure to gain. You were certainly getting the hang of it as your fighting became more fluent, you even started to predict how he would come after you next and manage to avoid the worst of his blows. "Very good." Daemon smiled as he took a step back, the fight had become more of a dance rather than a match of strength, which meant he had taught you well. "You may have a little break if you wish." He offered, your wounds were starting to slow you down.

You kept moving regardless of how your lungs felt like they were on fire or the pain that was starting to heavily throb, as if screaming for you to stop even if for another moment before you took a few more deep breaths and shook your head not wanting to stop yet "Again, I want to keep going." Daemon raised an eyebrow, it was unusual behavior for someone who had been pushed so far already. But he wasn't opposed to training you longer, the choice was yours after all. "Then we train until you decide otherwise." He smiled, his blade slowly moved in a circle as he prepared for another strike. It was clear you had an endless amount of energy to pour into these training drills, he appreciated it greatly.

After what felt like the longest few weeks of your life of training, pushing yourself harder then ever and getting to know the blonde-haired male you couldn't place why he wasn't coming around anymore or training you, still pushing yourself almost as hard as he was thinking he was just busy with his whole princely duties but when you couldn't find him or go out of his way to talk to you until you finally couldn't handle it anymore as you went to find him and ask about it. As you looked for Daemon you had quickly found him in his chambers, his expression was stern as he sat around acting like you being there didn't matter much. You could read his expression like an open book, you had already started to learn much about the rogue prince and how he carried himself. "I see you found me." Daemon spoke softly, his tone held a weight to it. "I'm going to be training you no longer." He stated simply, it was not a question, nor did it invite discussion.

Crossing your arms over your chest not caring how it looked as you went into the rouge prince's private chambers having grown annoyed with him, narrowing your eyes at him when you heard his words even as shocked as you were that he seemed done wanting to help you even after seeing how into he was getting. Throwing your arms to the side in a wide way not understanding why or what this was about but wasn't ready to give up but also wasn't ready for the harshness he was showing you "Why? you've been dodging this for a fortnight now without so much as a word, what happened?".

Daemon raised a brow in surprise as you asked the question so bluntly, it would have been an insult to anyone else. Unfortunately he could not deny you what you were demanding. "I have no interest in wasting my time." Daemon's statement was cold, his expression held only disdain in it. It was clear the prince was done with you as a student, he was never one to let a conversation go on for long not seeing the point in explaining why he was suddenly done being around you. He had other things that demanded his attention he willingly chose to ignore how the shift in heart toward you.

Daemon's eyes were hard as he stared back at you, he knew he had been avoiding you for a while now. "I told you there would be no hand holding." Daemon stated simply, although he was now wondering if he had been too harsh during his lessons. "I had to test your resolve." Daemon's tone was even as he explained his 'reasoning', he was a harsh mentor and didn't hold back when it came to his lessons. "And now I understand as to why nobody believed in you." Daemon chuckled softly. "I don't believe you can actually do it, I've seen all I needed to see." He said bluntly, it was cruel to tell you such a thing given how much enjoyment you had from your lessons. Yet it was something he deemed necessary.

Feeling your jaw dropped in shock at his words feeling like every other hit he had given you before didn't matter anymore until now due to the words he spoke feeling like it broke you from the inside out, shaking your head not knowing how to feel or that he actually came to understand he had feelings for you but let out a sigh as you closed your eyes taking a moment before you looked at him speaking harshly before you left his private chambers only now seeing the person everyone talked about "Your truly are a bastard."

His words cut you deeply more than any wound you had gotten from fighting, that was not what Daemon had intended. He was never a particularly sensitive person, he wasn't exactly the type to share emotional connections with people or so he always thought. That being said he couldn't help but feel some regret in his words as you stormed away hurt by his words. Daemon stayed still in his chambers, your harsh words lingering in his ears. He was unsure how to feel, he simply sighed and turned around to stare out the window Daemon let out a tired sigh. He had been the one to end your lessons, yet at the same time he regretted doing so. Maybe it was because of your potential, or perhaps he was just lonely he tried to force himself into thinking of many other reasons, despite there being women who would happily sleep with him. He hated to disappoint you with his response. "Y/n…" Daemon started but stopped, your response hurt him more than he realized. Yet he couldn't exactly disagree with your statement.

Feeling anger coursing through your veins even as you heard him attempting to call you back but still couldn't believe anything since he had seemed so different around you, shaking your head no longer caring in that moment as you slammed his door shut before making your way through the long hallways as your hands shook with rage but soon found yourself in the training yard alone as everyone had gone off to bed. Grabbing a sword as you took heavy deep breaths trying to calm down even as your thoughts became louder 'What’s the point of trying if it just proves that I’ll never be good enough?' and 'How much pain do you have to go through before giving up is okay?' but started roughly practicing as if all you could see was red as you kept swinging thinking of his words. Daemon looked through his chamber window, he could see your figure from afar practicing with your blade with such rapid succession you almost looked like a beautiful storm. He had been harsh with his words, perhaps he should have been softer, perhaps he should go back, explain everything. But he didn't, he turned away from the window and left you alone to your thoughts and your blade.

During the next so many weeks you had been practicing more and more without Daemon's guidance even going as far to ignore him like he had done to you, no longer caring how much you got hurt or what the weather was like you continued going outside. You were training your sword skill, slashing your blade on targets with great intensity that your hair was tossed around and your body drenched with sweat. However at some point when you got tired and your feet felt numb, you stopped and leaned on your sword breathing heavily but not yet stopping. Your face was filled with emotions. You weren’t sure how to react to Daemon’s words. You continued to train with the sword tightly in hand, the movements of your blade becoming more aggressive and wild without Daemon’s watchful gaze from the window.

A cold wind swept through the castle that night. Daemon was awake in his chambers unable to sleep, the memory of your anger replaying in his mind. He was so sure you held affection for him, the words you had spoken had shattered these thoughts. Was he that blind surely not, he had known love before, but this felt different. He needed to know. The prince rose from his bed, taking a dark cloak as he left his chambers, to find you. Continuing swinging your sword roughly even as it became more and more difficult to see, going to move only to slip as a harsh gasp slipped past your lips as you roughly fell down onto the ground hitting your head causing your vision to blackout not to long after as you now laid on the muddy and wet ground.

Daemon was conflicted in the choice he had made. He enjoyed seeing you train, you were an impressive sight to say the least. But on the other hand he regretted every word he said to you. So here he was, a silent observer of your practice without much clue of what it was he should say to you. You wouldn't respond nicely to more praise after all. No, he would need to win you over again if he was to continue being close to you. Daemon rushed outside looking for you until he went by the training grounds only to see you laying on the ground not moving, his cloak forgotten as he came across your unconscious body laying on the cold and wet ground. "No no no…" Daemon muttered as he ran to your side. You hit your head, that wasn't good, not at all. He cradled you gently in his arms, you were his responsibility, no one else's. "Y/n." Daemon whispered to you as he cradled your body in his arms, he couldn't risk letting anything happen to you. Different maesters looked after you after hearing order from the tall blonde prince, going over what treatment might work best before sighing as one went up to the rouge prince who had been pacing around like a cat knowing he wouldn't like hearing what's been happening "Y/n will be fine just a small fever and some weight loss but with enough rest and some good hearty meals she'll be just fine."

Daemon's expression was one of relief, despite the maester's reassurance that your condition was fine, he wouldn't be satisfied until he knew for sure. "Let me see." Daemon demanded, he knew the maester's weren't entirely trust worthy. If there was any chance of danger to you he wanted to know first. "Now." The prince's tone was firm and cold, he wasn't going to ask again. The maester let out a nervous chuckle but nodded to the prince's word as he started leading the way to where you laid still unconscious, standing on the side as the maester took only a few more notes due to the all bruising your body had before looking over at the blonde prince "I'm unsure when she'll awaken but in the meantime, it's best that you also get some rest and if anything happens you'll be the first to know."

Daemon nodded at the maester's words, but that wasn't enough for him. He followed the maester into the room where you laid in a bed of blankets. When he saw you were still unconscious he let out a sigh, he still wanted to see you even if you were sleeping. "If anything changes… tell me immediately." The rogue prince said coldly. He refused to leave your side until you woke, until he could talk to you again. He was so stubborn. After a few long days you slowly opened your eyes feeling groggy as you looked around wondering where you were, taking your time to sit up as you let out a soft groan at the harsh thumping in your head but saw nobody around knowing you were alone which caused you to make way out of the bed and left the room curious as to how you got there or how long you were even out for as you made way back to the training grounds.

Daemon heard from servants that there had been movement outside of the med bay, it almost sounded as if you were on your way to the training grounds. The rogue prince's brow furrowed at the sound, you were meant to be resting or at least that's what him and the maester's wanted. He followed word and started making his way hoping to see you, not saying a word as he observed what you were doing. He was in the shadows, so you were unaware of his presence. You sighed softly once you stepped foot on the training grounds before slowly picking up a sword, feeling your body was stiff and sore from not moving around in the last few days but rolled your shoulders a little as you started practicing again even if it was much slower due to the pain even as the thumping in your head became to be too much.

Daemon watched you intently from the shadows of the training grounds. His eyes were filled with a strange mix of curiosity and affection as he saw your struggle through your movements. He couldn't let you push yourself like this while you recovered. The prince approached you, his footsteps unheard even as he walked out of the darkness. Daemon's gaze continued to follow you, it was clear his care had grown since being there for you even if it meant being your teacher. Daemon decided it was probably better for him to talk to you now before you hurt yourself, you clearly had a lot of willpower and determination. "I had a feeling you'd be here." The prince emerged from the shadows, his tone held a small amount of amusement. "I'm almost impressed that you still wish to continue your training despite not being in the best of health." Daemon's expression grew serious as he spoke, though a small smile formed. "What of your injuries?"

You sighed softly to yourself by hearing his voice but didn't turn around to face him as you kept swinging, shaking your head as you started to feel angry with him all over again by his words as you recalled him saying otherwise even if you still didn't understand. Shrugging your shoulders as you let out a heavy breath but lowered the sword as you glanced over at him with a raised brow "What about them? why are you here?". The prince could see you were clearly agitated by his presence, there was some tension within you. "You should get some rest, not swing a blade like an idiot." Daemon's tone held no hint of annoyance as he spoke, even if he called you an idiot it was done with an air of respect. "I'm here to train you, not tend your wounds." Daemon spoke as if nothing had happened as he let out a frustrated groan, he had no desire to keep arguing with you. Although he couldn't help but be fascinated by your stubbornness.

Finally turning around to face Daemon as your grip tightened only to roughly throw the sword down onto the ground, narrowing your eyes up at him as you crossed your arms before letting out a scoff at his words and shook your head "You made it clear how you felt about training me don't bother, especially if you can't even give a reason other then being a bastard I don't want to hear it." You spoke not knowing about the feelings he had caught for you. Daemon's face was that of frustration and annoyance, for some reason that he couldn't understand you refused to move on from the previous conversation. At a certain point he considered just leaving but that small curiosity within him wouldn't let him. "Look, I don't know what else you want me to say." Daemon admitted, his words were honest but it felt like that wasn't good enough for you. "I just know I would regret not continuing to train you, that's all." Daemon spoke softly, his gaze was fixed on you.

You glared at him as you became more and more heated before no longer caring if he was a prince or not, walking up closer to him as you continued to speak harshly while making eye contact before you shoved him as much as you could while still weak and injured as you got your emotions out "Then why are you here? why are you pretending to care anymore? what do you want from me?". Daemon stumbled backwards, he hadn't been expecting you to shove him like that. If you were in the best condition there was a good chance you would have thrown him off balance. He looked up at you in surprise before responding. "I don't want anything from you." Daemon's tone held only honesty as he spoke, he was done with keeping his feelings secret. "I care about you." Daemon let out a frustrated groan, he didn't want to shout his words. "Is that so hard for you to believe?" He asked softly.

You stared into his eyes as you listened closely to what he was telling you trying to find a way to see if he were lying or not to you, moving your hands down to your sides as your hands tightened into fists saying nothing while his words slowly processed in your mind before you spoke again with an annoyed tone rather then anger "Prove it." His brows rose up, surprised by the request. "How exactly am I meant to do that?" Daemon's expression grew tense, you wanted him to prove his affection for you. There was no possible way for him to do that surely? But then he thought back to when you first started training and held his sword, the way your eyes met and the sudden flutter of his heart… He felt that moment of fondness again in his heart, it made his decision for him. He could trust you with his feelings. "Take my sword." Daemon said softly.

Shrugging your shoulders but watched him closely as if waiting to see if he actually cared or not like he said he did "I'm sure you'll figure it out", Crossing your arms again as you waited nearly turning around and walking away feeling like he was just lying once more before you gave him a look of confusion before slowly reaching out to his hand that held his sword he's used in battles enough times. Letting your hand and fingers graze his larger one as you took Dark Sister out of his hand but kept looking at him as if waiting for more. Daemon's expression lightened, he had hoped you wouldn't have refused him. Your hands were like ice against his own, yet your grip was strong despite what your body went through. He felt his face grow warm for a moment as they touched. "I'm not lying to you." Daemon's voice was soft, he couldn't bring himself to do that. "I promise." He had to be careful, he couldn't just confess to you then and there. "If you'll trust me." Daemon added “I pushed you away because you deserve better.”

You looked up at him not able to believe he just handed Dark Sister over to you and slowly nodded your head before clicking your tongue "But you lied before?", Only now noticing how close you both were almost as if pressed against one another before you quietly spoke while looking into his violet eyes “It sucks. Because I want to hate you, but I can’t.” Daemon could see the curiosity shining in your eyes, you were still trying to figure him out. "I lied to myself, I thought I could handle not seeing you, not being near you…" Daemon trailed, his voice was quiet as he confessed. "Let us be honest with each other, Y/n." Daemon spoke softly, his eyes were fixed intently on your own. Daemon could feel your proximity to one another, and he couldn't deny that it felt a little pleasant. He tried to ignore it as he focused on what you were saying. He gave a quick nod in response. "You have every right to hate me. I have done… bad things in the past." It almost felt good to admit that, he didn't like to speak openly about the dark things he had done but he felt compelled to be honest with you. "But I don't want you to hate me." Daemon whispered.

He had the opportunity to kiss you in that moment, and his heart desired for him to take it. His heart had made its decision, he just needed to give into what he felt. Daemon's eyes flickered with hesitation before he slowly moved towards you, his face close to yours like a storm waiting to strike. He couldn't help but be curious, would it feel the way he expected? He would never know if he didn't try. “You’re right: I’m a liar. But you can believe me, just this one time.” He softly brushed his lips against hers.

#daemon targaryen #daemon targeryen x reader #daemon x reader #daemon targaryen x reader #daemon x you #hotd daemon #hotd #house of the dragon

[edsanon]

I don’t feel like drawing, so have some platonic Lumi and Alastor headcanons :

They met via Rosie. They had seen each other before, Lumi accidentally helping Alastor taking down on an Overlord, but they officially met via Rosie.

Lumi is terrible at social cues, but they are good at picking up patterns, which is how they can read people, Alastor was no match for that.

Alastor is thankful for that, since Lumi can pick up on people, and Alastor can use that to his advantage to strike deals.

Lumi died in 1917 at 18, while Alastor died in 1933 at 35(ish). They often joke that they could’ve met each other had they lived in the same country, and how they could’ve been around the same age had they died at the same time.

Lumi and Alastor don’t exactly show vulnerability, if at all, so for one of them to show vulnerability, the other will have to show that first. It’s truly a mess.

During the time where Alastor disappeared, Lumi genuinely thought that he had died. They grieved and continued on with their life- until they saw the commercial for the hotel and they recognized him.

Lumi has their little family down in hell : twin sister, younger brother, youngest sister and mother. They do not get along with their mother. Their younger sister and father are in heaven.

Alastor doesn’t really like the twin sister, can barely handle the younger brother. But the youngest sister ? Who is a cannibal ? He adores her ! He doesn’t like children, but Yu is an exception, he secretly spoils her to no end.

Speaking about baby Yu, she resides in cannibal town with Rosie, Lumi visits often.

Alastor believes in discipline that involves hitting children (it’s canon), but he knows better than to hit any of Lumi’s siblings.

Being friends with Lumi made of Alastor a cat person. He hates dogs already, so a friend who is a cat and purrs and smells like happiness and all the best things ever ? Count him in.

Husk dislikes Lumi for this very reason.

Speaking of Husk and Niffty, Lumi likes them, they don’t understand how Husk hates being a cat, they’re apex predators after all, and they like Niffty, and Niffty adores them so much.

Lumi showed her a katana they use when they train with their students, ever since then they became one of Niffty’s favorite person.

Alastor has witnessed how they train their students, they were a samurai after all and he was curious. Let’s just say that watching them gave him new torture ideas with how rough and hard that training looked (He quite felt bad for that one student who had to start over 500 swings because their body wasn’t correctly placed in Lumi’s standards.)

Lumi reads Alastor better than a lot of people, so they know that he loves and craves attention 24/7 among other things. So when the attention is striped away from him (like in episode 5 where Mimzy turned her attention to Lucifer) Lumi is here to give him some attention (“So you used to dance ? Maybe I should accompany you to one of your outings then, I’d like to see that for myself.”)

Which Alastor appreciates immensely.

Lumi has a set of rules they follow to stay on Alastor’s good side.

Alastor was very sour when he learned that Lumi had a partner when they were human. They are the one to always give them the attention he wants and needs, to always praise him in some way, who can understand him like nobody else, he doesn’t want their attention away from him.

In reality when the partner comes along eventually, Alastor has now 2 people hyping him up and giving him attention when he needs it.

And this is Lumi’s partner we’re talking about, when Alastor latches out and tries to make the partner jealous (“I’ve stayed with them for the last 80 years”) instead of being met with anger and jealousy, he is met with patience, gratefulness and understanding. (“I see. Thank you for taking care of them, I am glad they found a friend who cares for them the way you do.”)

Alastor taught Lumi how to cook, and cooks for them sometimes.

And Lumi taught Alastor French. He had a good start, but it could’ve been better.

Lumi speaks 9 languages, and they are native Japanese.

Alastor had to teach himself how to hold chopsticks, and Lumi had to teach themselves how to use a fork.

Whenever Alastor notices that Lumi isn’t doing great (aka they start to melt because when their emotions are too much they become magma and they start to melt), he takes them on a walk in the Bayou side of his room.

Alastor and Lumi fought Adam together, they got severely hurt together and left to lick their wounds together.

Lumi has tagged along on a few radio broadcasts of Alastor, it’s just them sitting next to him, listening and purring quietly.

Alastor loves the sound of their purrs, he wants Husk to make the same sound.

Lumi started to use pet names such as “honey” or “baby” after hanging around Alastor and Rosie as much as they do.

Alastor often calls them “Lumi dear”, and occasionally “Darling” (he found out that the nickname snaps them out when they are panicking or experiencing a flashback of some sort)

Lumi nicknames Alastor “A-kun”

#hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #alastor #alastor headcanons #alastor hazbin hotel #alastor x oc #alastor x reader #hazbin hotel oc #hazbin hotel original character #hazbin oc #oc: lumi

[communistkenobi]

this is maybe silly to tell you about but i'm very envious of how smart you seem and the level of grasp you have on theory that feels incredibly scary to me. i was in uni for sociology, and save for one text that i understood from start to finish, the rest of it always felt like it was deleting my brain cells slowly and made me feel stupid, even as smn who had grown up being a "literature" person. i think it's just a matter of getting started, but it all feels embarrassing >>

what I’m about to say is going to sound very masturbatory and self-aggrandising, but that can’t really helped on account of the fact that the topic is what a smart little boy I am

one, thank you! I’m always very flattered when people give me this compliment. I don’t think it’s silly at all. two, I’m pursuing a PhD in the social sciences with the intent to stay in the academy after I get my doctorate, and my particular field of study skews towards critical theory. on average only 1% of people in canada have a PhD, and a fraction of that percentile have my particular academic trajectory - all of which to say, I am an outlier amongst a peer group of outliers, so I’m an extremely bad measuring stick to use when judging your own critical capabilities. I’ve been in post-secondary school for roughly 7 years now and will be in it for at least four more, and for the past 4ish of those years my main source of employment has been teaching and research, so I am both paying for and being paid to read theory and teach it to undergraduate students in small classroom settings. By the standards of academia I’m very junior, but I have a lot of specialised training in talking and reading, which is to say, it’s taken me a very long time to be where I am now. My academic career depends on my ability to produce original thoughts and write them down in a way that both speaks to existing scholarship while contributing new things to said scholarship, so I’m in an environment that enforces a very particular kind of discipline that is not remotely common or normal. Being a graduate student isn’t a rich profession by any means, but you are paid to learn information and write it down - something I would not be able to do if I was working a full time job.

I also frequently don’t understand the shit I’m reading! It’s extremely difficult to read academic texts because they’re meant to be read in classroom settings where you’re forced to voice your confusion, speak with other people about what you’re reading, defend your positions, connect it to other work, synthesise it in essay format, and so on. My live-blogging of books I’m reading is an attempt to simulate that, because I tend to learn best when writing out why I have the opinions I hold. Being confused isn’t a sign of stupidity but rather a simple fact that you’re brushing up against concepts and theories that take people their whole careers to develop and publish.

My own background in academia is also very eclectic, so I know a little bit about many topics, but there are very little topics can I speak authoritatively on - I can’t speak about the state of knowledge on, say, international relations, or critical race legal scholarship, or employment disability policy, but I know vaguely of those things. I’m not even a well-read marxist lol

All of which is to say - I am a horrible metric to compare yourself to. I am one of the few sickos who genuinely wants to remain in the academy for the rest of my life because I sincerely believe in the pursuit and production of knowledge, and my chance to do so is largely dependant on my ability to explain myself to other people. Put another way, I have spent my entire adult life training to be a marginally popular communist tumblrina on a website primarily known for producing supernatural actor porn. So either way don’t feel bad about it

#asks

[daitranscripts]

Wicked Eyes and Wicked Hearts (optional)

Grand Duke Gaspard

Wicked Eyes and Wicked Hearts Masterpost First: Gaining an Invitation Previous: Dance with the Duchess

The PC finds Gaspard on one of the balconies in the ballroom

Choice dependent dialogue:

First time speaking [1]

Spoken to before [2]

1- First time speaking:

Gaspard: My friend! Come in! Have a drink! What can I do for you?

Gaspard (high court approval): You’ve been busily charming the court, I see.

Gaspard (neutral court approval): If you’re as “delighted” by the court as I am, there’s a decanter of port around here.

Gaspard (low court approval): Not winning over the court? You’re in good company, at least. [3]

2 - Spoken to before:

Gaspard: It is always good to see you, my friend.

Gaspard (high court approval): You seem better at making friends among the nobility than I. Well done.

Gaspard (neutral court approval): Navigating the intrigues all right? Nobody’s poisoned you yet, have they?

Gaspard (low court approval): The nobles may hate you, Inquisitor, but when I am emperor, I’ll have most of them beheaded. [3]

3 - Dialogue options:

Champion: We have something in common. [4]

+20 court approval

Investigate: I’d like to know about you. [5]

Investigate: Let’s talk politics. [6]

Investigate: I found something interesting. [7]

General: Goodbye. [8]

4 - Champion: We have something in common.

PC: I understand you’re a chevalier. I’ve undergone similar training.

Gaspard: Ah, yes—a popular topic of conversation,

PC: Oh?

Gaspard: You may not wear the title, but to study…

Gaspard (Qunari PC): When one thinks of chevaliers, yours is not the image conjured.

Gaspard (dwarf PC): Your colorful background makes it all the more intriguing.

Gaspard (Dalish PC): You’d be more of a scandal, were it not for Briala.

Gaspard (human PC): The Free Marcher turned knight. You’ve captured imaginations.

Dialogue options:

General: Does my background matter? [9]

General: I match the best. [10]

General: I don’t need to prove myself. [11]

9 - General: Does my background matter? Human PC: I respect the honor and discipline required. There’s nothing remarkable in that. Non-human PC: I might not look the part of a knight, but I respect the discipline and skill required. Gaspard: Such reserve! You’ve taken up the sword in pursuit of glory—what could be nobler? [12] 10 - General: I match the best. PC: Minor details. I could best the finest chevaliers. Gaspard: (Laughs.) You have the arrogance for it. [12] 11 - General: I don’t need to prove myself. PC: I don’t need to prove myself to them. Gaspard (high court approval): The court must find your candor novel. Or do you save it for me? Gaspard (neutral/low approval): Such delightful indifference! I doubt the court shared that opinion. [12] 12 - Scene continues. Gaspard: Come, my lady! My comrades-in-arms are rarely so charming. Gaspard: Come! We are kindred spirits, you and I. Brothers-in-arms must stand together. Gaspard: Find a drink, and we shall toast to it. [Back to 3]

5 - Investigate: I’d like to know about you.

PC: I’d like to know more about you.

Gaspard: All of Orlais knows my story. But you, are far too sensible to be Orlesian. The heart of it is simple: I am the rightful heir to the throne of Orlais. But my cousin Celene is a politician, while I am a man of action. She charmed the council of Heralds. They gave the crown to her. And while it looks fetching on her, I intend to take it back.

13 - Dialogue options:

Investigate: You’re the true heir? [14]

Investigate: How did Celene take power? [15]

General: You’re here to negotiate. [16]

General: The crown, or her head? [17]

General: Fair enough. [18]

14 - Investigate: You’re the true heir? PC: What’s your claim to the throne? Gaspard: The Hundred Days Cough swept Val Royeaux in 8:77. It killed thousands of children—royalty and commoner alike. There are only three living grandchildren of Emperor Judicael the First: myself, my sister Florianne, and Celene. And I am the eldest. By rights, the crown should have passed to me. [Back to 13] 15 - Investigate: How did Celene take power? PC: If you’re the rightful heir, how did Celene become empress? Gaspard: I am the oldest, but I lack the Valmont name. My mother was the late emperor’s sister. Celene is a Valmont. her honored father was my mother’s brother. But she is the youngest. When there is any doubt surrounding the line of succession, the matter falls to the Council of Heralds. Celene outplayed me, forming alliances on the council for support. So they passed over me in her favor. [Back to 13] 16 - General: You’re here to negotiate. PC: So you intend to out-negotiate your cousin. Gaspard: It will take heroic effort on my part, Inquisitor. And a lot of brandy. The talks will take most of the evening. Maker willing, we will emerge triumphant. [Back to 3] 17 - General: The crown, or her head? PC: Just what are you claiming? Her crown, or her head? Gaspard: If Celene loses her head, it will not be my doing. I want my empire. I do not wish harm on my cousin, but I would not weep at her demise. [Back to 3] 18 - General: Fair enough. PC: A straightforward goal. Gaspard: We are straightforward people, you and I. But at court, twists and turns are in fashion. We must navigate a maze of vipers, my friend. Maker willing, there will be enough port. [Back to 3]

6 - Investigate: Let’s talk politics.

PC: I have a question about the peace talks.

19 - Dialogue options:

Investigate: What do you get out of this? [20]

Investigate: Tell me about your politics. [21]

Investigate: If Celene dies, what happens? [22]

Investigate: How are the talks going? [23]

Investigate (danced with Florianne): Your sister names you traitor. [24]

20 - Investigate: What do you get out of this? PC: You didn’t extend this invitation out of the goodness of your heart, Grand Duke. Gaspard: As you might have guessed, I am not the most political man. If the nobles believe the Inquisition supports me, it will help in negotiations. And I take little joy in watching the scandalized expressions when they see us together. 25 - Dialogue options: - Investigate: Tell me about the others. [26] - Investigate: Tell me about the peace talks. [27] - [Back to 19] 26 - Investigate: Tell me about the others. PC: What can you tell me about Celene and Briala? Gaspard: Briala may be called “ambassador,” but she is purely a spy. She works toward some hidden agenda. Elves have no place in politics. Her presence here is suspicious. Celene is a skilled player in the Game. She knows how to het her way with a few words an a smile. But the Game is a farce. I will prove that a few hundred chevaliers are better than diplomacy. [Back to 25] 27 - Investigate: Tell me about the peace talks. PC: What will be going on in these negotiations? Gaspard: We will whittle one another down with words until we are bored into agreement. Celene will talk circles around us, that elf will glower and cast suspicion everywhere, and I will get very drunk. Somehow, but the time they stop serving drinks, a war will be ended. Politics, my friend. (Sighs.) Dialogue options: - General: You sound less than pleased. [28] - General: And if the drinks run out? [29] - General: What a waste of time. [30] 28 - General: You sound less than pleased. PC: I get the distinct impression that you don’t enjoy politics, Duke Gaspard. Gaspard: In Orlais, the call it “the Great Game.” They believe it is something you can play and win. But there are no winners. Like dogs playing Wicked Grace, it is a mockery of action. [31] 29 - General: And if the drinks run out? PC: What calamities befall us if they stop serving drinks early? Gaspard: If we’re lucky? Another war will break out. I cannot abide by “the Game,” my friend. I prefer my enemies armed and facing me. I like clear winners and losers. [31] 30 - General: What a waste of time. PC: We have a giant whole in the sky. None of this matters. Gaspard: You and I are in complete agreement, my friend. The court sees this as the Game, but it is nothing of the sort. [31] 31 - Scene continues. Gaspard: Give me a battlefield, Inquisitor. I will show you who the victors are. When I am emperor, there will be changes. No more of this courtier’s nonsense. The nobles may not like it, but after a few lose their heads, they’ll fall in line. [Back to 25]

21 - Investigate: Tell me about your politics. PC: What are you hoping to achieve at the negotiations? Gaspard: I intend to take back what is rightfully mine. Celene stole the crown through politicking, but I am the rightful Emperor of Orlais. The empress has been mired in intrigue for too long. We need a clear course of action. 32 - Dialogue options: - Investigate: What course of action? [33] - General: But you’re here for politics. [34] - General: You want to fight more wars. [35] - General: That makes sense. [36] 33 - Investigate: What course of action? PC: What action did you have in mind? Gaspard: The empire is declining. We cannot allow Nevarra and Ferelden to chip away at our borders. I will see Orlais return to glory as the strongest nation in Thedas. [Back to 32] 34 - General: But you’re here for politics. PC: You say you hate politics, but you’re here to negotiate. Gaspard: I can play the Game when I must. If I couldn’t, I’d be dead by now, Inquisitor. But it is not my choice. Celene has my sister involved in this mess. I would prefer to settle this on the battlefield, but for Florianne… I will sit and talk. [Back to 25] 35 - General: You want to fight more wars. PC: You intend to return to expansionism. Gaspard: I like to solve problems in the simplest answer, my friend. [Back to 25] 36 - General: That makes sense. PC: I can understand that. Gaspard: I knew we were both called to action, my friend. [Back to 25]

22 - Investigate: If Celene dies, what happens?

PC: If something were to happen to the empress, how would that change your plans?

Gaspard: Celene has not declared an heir. If the Maker called her home, the crown would fall to me. But the Council of Heralds would try to implicate me in any misfortune. If they succeeded, the crown could pass to my sister or one of our more distant cousin.

23 - Investigate: How are the talks going?

PC: How have the negotiations been so far?

Gaspard: The port won’t last the evening, I’m afraid. We will end the night will nothing settled. Which should surprise nobody, but it will disappoint my sister. I don’t know why she had such high hopes for this ball. Florianne always was hopelessly optimistic.

24 - Investigate: Your sister names you traitor.

PC: The grad duchess says you’re plotting to kill Celene.

Gaspard: Resorting to rumormongering, Inquisitor? Come, we are beyond such childish stratagems. My sister would never say that. There are no words to convince me that Florianne would turn on me.

7 - Investigate: I found something interesting.

PC: I discovered something you might be interested in.

37 - Dialogue options:

General (found elven locket): I’ve got something on Celene. [38]

General: I’ve got something on Briala. [39]

General: I found something on you. [40]

38 - General: I’ve got something on Celene. PC: It’s about Celene. Dialogue option: - General: Celene kept an elven locket. [41] - [Back to 37] 41 - General: Celene kept an elven locket. PC: She had an elven locket sealed in the vault. Gaspard: Briala’s no doubt. What that sentiment, Celene? How unlike you. Blackmail, perhaps. Not quite damning enough for a scandal, but such a trinket could be useful leverage against one or both of them. [Back to 38]

39 - General: I’ve got something on Briala. PC: It’s about Briala. 42 - Dialogue options: - General (found negotiations): Briala’s sabotaging the talks. [43] - General (found cylinder seal): Some servants spy for Briala. [44] - [Back to 37] 43 - General: Briala’s sabotaging the talks. PC; She’s killed ambassadors and changed their documents. Gaspard: You can prove this? Now that is interesting. What is she trying to accomplish? She bears closer watching than I thought. [Back to 42] 44 - General: Some servants spy for Briala. PC: She’s got people hidden among the servants all over the place. Gaspard: I suspected as much, but couldn’t confirm it. She’s difficult adversary to predict. There’s no telling what move she intends to make. [Back to 42]

40 - General: I found something on you. PC: It’s about you, in fact. 45 - Dialogue options: - General (spoke to his vassal): You threatened the council. [46] - General (found secret orders): You snuck men in tonight. [47] - General (found dagger in servants’ quarters): You killed a council emissary. [48] - [Back to 37] 46 - General: You threatened the council. PC: Want to tell me why you were threatening the members of the Council of Heralds? Gaspard: The language of politics, Inquisitor. If you cannot bribe politicians, you threaten them into backing down. Most of the council are Celene’s lapdogs. There was little chance I could win their support any other way. [Back to 45] 47 - General: You snuck men in tonight. PC: I have the orders issued to your general to sneak troops into the palace. Gaspard: Of course I did. The Winter Palace is hardly neutral ground for a peace talk. I would be disappointed in Celene if she were not using this opportunity to set a trap. And while we rarely agree on anything, I have never yet been disappointed in out empress. [Back to 45] 48 - General: You killed a council emissary. PC: There’s a Council of Heralds emissary in the servants’ quarters. Stabbed to death with your knife. Gaspard: No, that’s impossible. Who would try to pin such a crime on me? The elf? It seems unlike Celene. [Back to 45]

8 - General: Goodbye.

PC: We’ll speak later, Duke Gaspard.

Gaspard: Another time, friend.

Next (optional): The Trophy Room Next (optional): Ladies-In-Waiting Next (optional): An Elven Locket Next (optional): The Elven Ambassador Next (optional): Dance with the Dowager Next (optional): The Court Historian Next (optional): The Lower Garden

Next: The Royal Wing

#dragon age inquisition #dragon age #dai transcripts #dragon age transcripts #dragon age dialogue #wewh #wicked eyes and wicked hearts #long post #thank god #this was misery

[weightlossideea]

When you’re trying to lose weight, it’s important to stay healthy and not just focus on the number on the scale. That’s why this list of healthy weight loss tips will help you shed pounds in a safe way that doesn’t sacrifice your overall well-being. Whether you want to lose 10 pounds or more, these suggestions will help ensure your weight loss is as healthy as possible and keeps up with your goals!

Shedding excess pounds safely

You’ve likely heard of crash diets, which come with severe limitations. They also come with extremely quick weight loss, but at a cost. If you’re trying to lose weight for good without putting your health at risk, it’s best to look into safe ways to shed excess pounds. Here are a few tips that can help you on your journey towards a healthier lifestyle. For example, check out how some of these tips have helped me personally. I’m confident they can work for you too! For example, I recently decided to focus on losing fat in my belly region (I had gained a lot over time) by cutting back my calories significantly—without going hungry or resorting to extreme measures like unsafe fad diets or unhealthy supplements—and simply eating natural foods while exercising regularly. It took some time and dedication, but in less than two months I was able to go from carrying around 10 extra pounds around my belly region down to 6. Not only did I get rid of those pesky extra inches; but more importantly, I felt better about myself knowing that I achieved my goal safely and naturally! Good luck on your journey towards healthy weight loss!

Keep an eye on your nutrient levels

It’s one thing to exercise regularly and take in a healthy, nutrient-dense diet—but it’s important to monitor your levels of vitamins, minerals, electrolytes, etc. This is especially true if you have a health condition or an ongoing illness that might make it difficult for you to feel (or see) any effects of making dietary changes. For example, someone with Type 1 diabetes may need higher levels of magnesium and/or zinc than someone without a medical condition. If you find you aren’t losing weight as quickly as expected or experiencing side effects from your efforts, speak with your doctor about supplementing your plan with extra nutrients.

Understand Why Some People Fail

Many of us assume our weight loss struggles stem from a lack of discipline or willpower, but research shows that our body is not as simple as we'd like it to be. For example, certain foods don't just pack on pounds; they also trigger hormones in your body that tell you you're hungry even when you've already eaten. Similarly, sometimes we don't gain weight because we eat too much—we gain weight because a hormone imbalance tells us not to stop eating. Many factors affect our bodies ability to lose fat; some are still mysteries for scientists, so it's best not to take yourself or your own health for granted.

Make Weight Lifting Part of Your Routine

Lifting weights is an excellent way to lose weight. It boosts metabolism, burns calories during exercise, and builds muscle. Increasing your muscle mass will also increase your resting metabolic rate—the number of calories you burn while at rest. Most important, lifting weights doesn't require much time or equipment: A good, 30-minute full-body workout can be done with just one pair of dumbbells, which you can find at most sporting goods stores for less than $50. You don't need a gym membership; all you need is enough space in your home to do a few basic exercises like squats and pushups.

Get Moving in Moderation

One of the biggest mistakes people make when they want to lose weight is over-exercising. It’s common for people trying to shed pounds to do lots of cardio, but what you really need are high-intensity exercises that work your muscles in new ways. High-intensity interval training, where you alternate between low- and high-intensity exercise for periods of 20–30 seconds like sprinting or shadowboxing is one way to do it. Try mixing in resistance training with plyometrics (exercises like squat jumps) which will help build muscle mass without adding a lot of bulk. Follow up these exercises with a 5-minute cool down where you stretch out all your muscles again, rather than rushing off right after your workout is done – cooling down prevents injury.

Change Your Diet, But Don’t Overdo It

Diet plays a crucial role in weight loss. Yet one of the most common mistakes people make when trying to lose weight is going on an extreme diet that leaves them hungry. Try eating small, regular meals instead of large ones (just be sure not to overeat). Make sure you have fiber-rich foods at each meal so you can stay full longer. Drink plenty of water—this will help keep you hydrated, which leads to healthy bowel movements. What’s more, according to research, staying well-hydrated may also prompt your body’s muscles to use more fat as fuel! These are just a few healthy weight loss tips you should start incorporating into your daily routine today.

#lose weight #weight loss tips #lose fat #healthy #healthy eating #clean eating #ketoweightloss #usa health #gym body #weightloss goals #website #healthy food #follow

[lihikainanea]

Hi Lei! I saw you mentioned in your bio that you're a martial artist. I've been wanting to get into martial arts for like, fitness purposes and to learn how to defend myself (I'm an eeny teeny 4'11 girl). There are so many kinds though, I don't know how to choose?? do you have recommendations? 🙏

oh babes, I was SO excited to answer this. I could literally talk about martial arts ALL DAY. I've been a student for...oof, I think it's 14 years now? maybe 15.

You have to think about what's important to you, and what you like. Do you want styles that are more grappling, more focused on taking your opponent to the ground? If so, then judo and Brazilian jiu jitsu is more up your alley. Do you want to focus on flexibility and speed? If so, then tae kwon do might be more what you're looking for. Do you want a street style, one where you learn to take a punch as much as you learn to throw one? If so, then maybe kyokushin is for you.

Every martial art--any martial art--is better than no martial art. There's weird attitudes between the disciplines--grappling is superior to stand up styles, and harsher ones are better than soft and more fluid ones--but it's a ridiculous argument. Every martial art will teach you to defend yourself, and to be more aware of your surroundings.

I do kyokushin karate, but before I tell you why I chose that, let's review some of the other common styles.

Judo and BJJ are great if you're tiny (like me!), because it teaches you how to use an opponent's brute force and weight against them. You don't have to be strong to throw someone into a wall. But these styles are more focused on ground work, and on taking the fight to the ground--these styles won't teach you how to punch, or how to take a punch, or necessarily teach you how to avoid one from somebody who's throwing haymakers in a bar. These styles are focused on the joints and on avoidance--how to lock up an opponent in a real painful way so that they CAN'T throw a punch. If you want a ground style, one that focuses not on strikes but more on locks and literally tying up your opponent with your own body, then go for one of these.

Tae kwon do on the other hand is a stand up style, and one that focuses primarily on the legs. Tae kwon do's philosophy is that the legs are the longest, strongest part of any human body--so they should be used as weapons. Tae kwon do martial artists are INCREDIBLY flexible and very quick, they use their legs to both strike and block. A huge emphasis is on flexibility so if that's your jam, then this style is for you. You will learn to strike and to block, and you'll get some sparring experience in a safe environment. Even in the dojo (the karate school/training hall), all protective gear is worn when sparring with fellow students. You'll be fully padded, and there's minimal risk for things like a black eye or an injury.

Chinese forms of martial arts deserve much consideration as well-things like kung fu/wushu, wing chun. These are more deeply rooted in tradition and you'll learn a fluidity of movements along with what we call kata, a series of movements a bit like a dance. I don't know how much fighting is involved in these because I'm not very well versed in them, but they are by FAR one of my favourite martial arts to watch. Their kata are nothing short of absolutely poetic and mesmerizing.

Now, I can speak more to kyokushin karate because that's my discipline--I've been practicing it for well over a decade and I earned my shodan, my black belt, 4 years ago.

Kyokushin is a brutal style, and I continuously refer to this passage in quite possibly my favourite book ever:

“Kyokushin fighters, you can see it the minute they step into a sparring ring. Kyokushin fighters—Kyokushinkai, they call themselves—do one thing: they fight. They don’t circle, they don’t work angles, they don’t dance around, and they don’t do a lot of fancy kicking. They go straight in, and they don’t stop. They block solely to clear a path for their own strikes.

Other styles of karate have pronounced strategic preferences—for example, the linearity of Shotokan karate, the circular tactics of Goju-ryu. But the only thing like a kyokushin sparring strategy that I’ve ever been able to discern is: hit the other guy first, and hit him so hard he can’t hit you back. It is ferocious and brutal and, frankly, not an especially artistic approach to the martial arts. “One punch,” Sensei used to tell us, “should be all you need.” That is Kyokushin. It’s a ruthless approach to karate and to life; it’s the way the bad guys fought in The Karate Kid."

We fight. I chose kyokushin because it was very important to me that I 1) would learn how to take a punch, and 2) would learn how to fight someone considerably bigger than me, because I'm 5'2. Kyokushin's basic operating principle is that you will likely never get attacked by someone smaller than you.

It was also really important to me that I learned what it was like to get hit--to get well and truly punched, because let me tell you, the firs time it happens--it's shocking. Your brain just shuts down. You might cry. You go into shock over the fact that someone is trying to hurt you. Your body has zero fight or flight response, and instead just stays there stunned.

In kyokushin, we don't wear protective gear when we fight. We believe in the importance of feeling the pain, and most importantly--of quickly getting over it. Of overcoming it. Of barely registering it anymore. I go into a fight and I get socked full force to the gut and I just have zero response, because any flight response has been trained out of me through 15 years of getting punched in the gut. Furthermore, we learn not to show pain--in tournaments if we take a hit, not only are we docked points for taking the hit but we're docked FURTHER points if our face registers any pain--a grimace, an oof, a contortion of features--more points lost.

Because you need to learn to take the punch and to not even feel it. Your only response should be indignation, anger that they got one in.

I chose kyokushin for its brutality, it's emphasis on the real world. We go through exercises where we're blindfolded and have to defend ourselves, we go through exercises where we can only fight with either one or two limbs. And it's to mimic a real life scenario where maybe we won't have all of our senses when we need to fight, or maybe we won't have all of our limbs in good enough shape to strike--so how do you defend yourself, at a disadvantage? This is why I chose it. I chose it because I liked that it emphasized that if you're being attacked, you're already at a disadvantage--so what the fuck do you do from there?

But it's not for everyone. I've gone to work with a black eye. I've broken almost every bone in my body. For an entire week after my yudansha shinsa--my black belt grading that lasted over 8 hours--I was pissing blood from so many hits to the kidneys. Kyokushin hurts. But moreimportantly--it teaches you that pain is no reason to panic, and it teaches you to get angry when someone tries to hurt you.

Do some research, watch some videos on YouTube. Find a style that speaks to you--and it's okay to try some, until you find one you like. It's okay to do several. I still practice in Kyokushin, but I snag a Krav Maga or a BJJ class whenever I can too.

[jjungkooksthighs]

"I've told you before that by the time I'm done with you, you won't be able to walk. "

W-wait.. I thought that was just an e-expression. You were being serious, alpha..?*whimpering*

"Have you considered that if I can render you incapable of walking with how hard and rough I can fuck you–my mate–there are other ways I deal with wolves that think it wise to cross me?"

*eyes tearing up as I sink into my chair*

I n- never thought of it that way..

Oh my fucking god.

I think I'm going to faint with how terrified I am right now. Omfg omfg I'm crying. Sobbing. Bawling my eyes out.

Ok...

Alpha, I've understood the number of humongous fucking mistakes I've made over the past few days. I just wanted to see how far I could push you, and I think in the future, I'd have to think twice, thrice, infinite times before doing regrettable yet enjoyable no sorry, sorry shit like this.. I've pushed your buttons far too much, and I've realised it far too late. I beg for your forgiveness. I'm so fucking terrified right now, am bawling my eyes out, and my hands and spine are trembling, so please, show me mercy. Be the bigger person here and please be merciful with your omega. I don't know what possessed my being to speak so disrespectfully, misbehave, to even try and challenge your words and you, my alpha. I don't know how I could have allowed myself to be possessed by anything other than you.

I'll do as you say regarding listening to the audios, please guide me. However, I beg of you to please.. show me mercy. I will do as you say. I now realise that I have no choice. I submit. I have no choice. I'll never forget how you are capable of beastly intimidation ever again.. I'll try not to forget that you own every single part of my soul, body, me. Please, I beg of you alpha... grant me your forgiveness.. Forgive your dear omega, your mate..

Cry for me more. Your tears fall so readily onto my tongue. Even now, you cannot help but to get wet for me.

Look at you now, my omega. How far you have cracked from that wooden facade that crumbled so easily under me. Trembling and stuttering just like you always do in my presence.

You had better think about your actions next time or risk severe punishment, little wolf, because I assure you that next time I will not entertain your rebellious act as I did this time. Next time, you'll be dragged to my chambers by the scruff of your neck by my own teeth. I'll bend you over my knee and discipline you with some slaps on that pretty ass of yours before you get thrown over the nearest surface and taken from behind while I hold your hands with one of mine behind your fucking back.

You say you are terrified now, but you were on the cusp of awakening another side of me. A side that is entirely primal. Unhinged and unrelenting.

You can beg all you wish–and you're so cute when you plead for me like that–but I've already made up my mind. You made your bed; now you have to lie in it.

I will make sure that this does not happen again. And the only way to do that is to teach you a lesson. One where you will be punished for your wrongs.

"Be the bigger person here," you say...well, I am big in many aspects of myself. Big arms, big thighs, big hands...big cock, too. All of which I will use to pound you, rail you, and take you until all you can do is pass out from it all.

And when you wake, there will be no more rest. I'll mount you as many times as I need to until I'm satisfied and secure in the knowledge that you've been thoroughly tamed and trained to obey me.

Because you'll know then what happens if you do not.

You wanted this. You wanted to play with fire. It's why you let yourself continue even after I told you to put the damn stick down.

This whole thing started with your disloyalty in succumbing to the voices of other males. You do not need any when you have me. Clearly I have not done well in assuring you of that, but you'll learn tonight. Tonight, you're going to be instructed over and over on who the only male is that can please you. That can touch you. That can screw you.

You tell me you'll try not to forget that I own you, but it is only a matter of time before you are shown, without a doubt, that it is but a fact that you belong to me and me alone.

No amount of pleading will aid you now. Your fate is sealed.

It is a fortunate thing that it is colder due to the winter that has come. It will be fun to rip your clothes to shreds and watch your skin pebble and your pretty, perky nipples harden without my body to keep you warm.

And you'll beg for me then just as you do now, but I won't come to you. You'll remain exactly where I tell you to, bound by silver that I made for you that I'll put on your wrists and ankles.

You'll whine for me. You'll whimper for me. You'll even cry for me.

I will not let you escape from this. You will repent with those words of yours and you will fucking mean it. And if you can convince me that you are sincere and earnest in those apologies, maybe then I will take off the anklets. The bracelets will stay on. The entire night.

You will not get to touch me. Not until you're drooling and limp underneath me, your throat aching from how loud you'll have screamed my name over and over again.

[ciaraloves]

hello ciara!! i have a bit of an...issue in fanfic writing. See, when i write i kind of have to immerse myself in the pov character' head. (does everyone do this?) and cannot write if I'm in my head (eg. during college hours, college days - where my head cannot be in anyone else's) any suggestions on how to deal with this? it isn't entirely a bad thing but it does prevent me from balancing fic and studies and that...sucks. so any suggestions from you or your followers?

hiiiiii!! I am so so so sorry for taking a thousand years to get back to you

honestly lovely anon, I cannot speak on this too much because I write in bursts and don’t hold myself to any kind of schedule or discipline when it comes to writing

some things I’ve heard work for writing consistency are:

1. dedicate time in your day to write. the same time every day. whether that be in the evening, or early morning, or midday. train yourself to associate writing with a certain time and you might be able to slip in and out of your writing headspace with more ease

2. don’t set unrealistic goals when it comes to writing. if you know you cannot write 1000 words every day (simply because you don’t have the mental energy, time or motivation) then don’t hold yourself to those standards. it’s easy to lose motivation for writing simply because you aren’t doing what you thought you could do. if all you can manage one day is 10 words then that’s enough. if you can’t manage any words that’s also fine.

consistency is important but enjoying the process is more important. that’s really what keeps the writing motivation going.

3. experiment with different characters and different situations. if you love to write coffee shop aus for a specific fandom try writing them for another. or try putting your favourite characters into a completely different genre. if you’re switching up your writing style just a little to suit the genre you have a sort of goal to work towards and a change of scenery (so to speak)

I’m not saying don’t write what you want or what you’re comfortable writing, I’m just saying keep trying to find more things to write about and more ways to write it. a big part of writing (much like drawing) is continually changing and prodding and poking at unfamiliar things to see what changes and how it works with what you already know.

chocolate cake is delicious, but adding a little coffee makes it that much better, you know?

beyond this I don’t have much for you. I hope you find your sweet spot and learn for yourself how to keep school and writing and anything else you like in the juggling pool :)

again I am forever sorry for taking so long to respond to this :( it’s been sitting in my drafts for eons and I just hadn’t had the chance to catch it

anyway, if any of my lovely humans have advice tor anon please do add it here ! it’s always wonderful to spread good writing mojo around

mwah! stay bright, stay well sweet anon <3

#anon loves #when I say this has been here for like 8 months :((((( #I’m sorrryyyyy #ciara’s convos #writing #ciara’s guides

[news4usonline]

Actress Kelley Poling talks values and ‘Peter Five Eight’

(News4usonline) - Speaking with actress Kelley Poling is like sitting down in some quaint little breakfast nook and having a cup of coffee with your best friend. The “Peter Five Eight” star is easy to chat with and gives off no airs of being a celebrity as she talks about her latest starring role in the Kevin Spacey-fronted thriller. Although she makes a living from portraying other people, Poling is a fitness and athletic model turned thespian with a grounded in family values personality that makes her a breath of fresh air in the land of Hollywood. Much of that comes from her Midwest roots. Poling hails from Cleveland, Ohio, home to the famous Dawg Pound. Poling is also a reflection of her home life where picking up a firearm and properly using them became secondhand. Actually, when you review and consider her background, Poling is a badass of sorts. Coming from a military family, Poling developed into a lady who knows how to pop off a few rounds of ammo with excellence and one who is a marksman with the bow and arrow, thanks to her archery experience. That’s not to mention that Poling also knows how to run swords around the average person as a classical fencer. Tough lady. Yet when Poling speaks it is as gentle as the morning breeze.    “My dad was a military man, so our weekends were…we had a cabin in Pennsylvania and he would take us and it was hunting, fishing, shooting skills, all kinds of skills, having to do with outdoors, staying alive,” said Poling. “But it gave me a strong appreciation for nature and adventure growing up and hard work and what it takes to balance those two.” Poling’s appreciation of weaponry grew exponentially when her dad and his buddies would get together for some target practice. “My dad loved his friends that…they would all get together and do these re-enactments, they would their powder gun thing where they would shoot the targets,” Poling said. “So I had an appreciation for the mechanism of weapons. But my favorite was always the sword because No. 1, they were pretty and I was a girl and they didn’t smell like gunpowder, and they weren’t loud and noisy.”   The sword or the attraction to the weapon took on a new meaning for Poling when she would watch swashbuckling film star Errol Flynn (The Adventures of Robin Hood). “I watched the older movies,” remarked Poling. “I loved Errol Flynn. Now it’s Star Wars, kids with their light sabers. Back then, for me, it was the sword. So I always wanted to learn how to use it. So it influenced me. I got into fencing and that’s how it kind of started, but I also knew how to use all the guns, how to take care of myself, you know, on an adventure in the wilderness and outdoors. We were always doing something.” Doing something growing up usually meant fulfilling household chores and the like for Poling. “I grew up in a midwestern family, strong values, good religion,” Poling said. “I had to do chores every day. My grandmother didn’t let us rest for a second. I mean, the minute we woke up, it was breakfast, then cleaning and then preparing lunch, and more cleaning, then harvesting some vegetables.” Poling said that early discipline of a rigorous work ethic is something she applies all the time in her line of work today. “The first thing that I would do in the morning when I would wake up as a kid is we had to make our beds,” Poling. “You could be mindless and tired and out of it at 6 a.m and don’t want to go to school…it didn’t matter. You got up, you made your bed. You can do that mindlessly. It’s sort of having that routine of this is what you do, then you do this, then you this. It makes it a little black and white, but it also helped with time management and responsibility, and even if it wasn’t super important to have a made bed, it was more about how it trained you to do something.” That childhood training is something Poling banks on in everything that she does. “I feel like it gave me a discipline and a responsibility to do everything in my life,” Poling said. “I feel like that’s the No. 1 reason; faith and family. Of course, how I got this far in my career. I could have never done it without my childhood being the way it was. I’m very grateful for it.”

Actress Kelley Poling, who stars in the thriller, "Peter Five Eight," is a master in firearms and weaponry. Courtesy photo Poling’s first gig on the screen is an uncredited appearance in “Weekend at Bernie’s in 1989.” It would not be until 2019, when she appeared in the short “Still Your Son,” that Poling re-emerged as a viable actor. She is also listed as appearing in another short in 2016. Either way, that’s quite a career gap. Before she dived full-time into acting, Poling made her money working as a bathing suit and athletic model, crediting Nike, Yamaha, and Harley Davidson, among her clients. “I was never like the high fashion runway model,” said Poling. “I was always the one that was if it was a motorcycle, I’m on the motorcycles. If it was Waverunners, I was on the Yamaha..I was always like doing something which was a lot of fun for me. That was the biggest draw. I think it wasn’t actually getting my picture taken. I think that just actually led into the acting part.” Poling may have just gotten back into the acting swing a couple of years ago, she has been high in demand as of late. In just 2022 alone, Poling is scheduled to appear in as many as eight projects, including “Peter Five Eight.” She is also involved in other acting gigs as well, according to her IMDB page. Making the transition to go from doing photo shoots to acting has been a natural progression for her, Poling said.  

Before she became an actress, Kelley Poling made a living as a fitness and athletic model. Courtesy photo/Kelley Poling “It’s completely natural,” said Poling. “I feel like everything that I’ve learned in my life has come into play. Like I couldn’t be doing the things that I’m doing now at a younger age. It’s like the real world experience. You have to experience  being an adult doing different careers, meeting different people to know how to truly be authentic in your characters instead of reading about them.” In regards to her character in “Peter Five Eight,” her latest film delivery, Poling plays the role of Jen who is looking to buy a house in a small community. Without giving anything away about the film, Poling did say it was great to work with Spacey.  “I am so proud to be working with the two-time Oscar-winning actor,” Poling said. “I mean, it’s a dream for most actors to be able to work with somebody with so much depth and talent.” Spacey is one of the most heralded actors of this generation. He has won a Tony Award (Lost in Yonkers). He has also been the recipient of four Screen Actors Guild Awards and two Academy Awards (Usual Suspects, American Beauty). Besides his incredulous acting chops, what impressed Poling the most about Spacey was his sense of humor. “He was charismatic. He was a complete gentleman,” said Poling. He had us laughing in between takes. I mean, everyone on set was laughing. The bad thing was you had to be a really good actor because he would take you out of character laughing so much and then you’d have to come right back into character when they were ready to film again.” Read the full article

#KelleyPoling #KevinSpacey #model #PeterFiveEight

[ratralsis]

Eleven

(Table of Contents)

"Whom did you kill?" He asked her as she entered the training hall.

"What are you talking about?" She countered, slipping her shoes off and walking across the room.

"You took a sword out of the training hall. On whom did you use it?" His gaze was unwavering as he looked down at her. She was taller than some adults she knew, but he was still taller.

"Nobody," She said. "I didn't kill anybody. And what makes you think I took a sword out of here?"

"The fact that you took a sword is what makes me think you took a sword," He said. "Why?"

"No, of course I--" She lost her nerve. "I wanted to try practicing with one. To see how different it would feel compared to a training sword."

"If you want to practice with one, use one meant for practicing," He said. "Swords are tools for cutting people."

"Swordsmanship can be an art, too, though!" She said, her voice rising. "We've been to displays of swordsmanship before, and some people learn it simply for the discipline and exercise."

"Some people do," He said. "You and I do not."

"Why keep real ones in here, then?" She asked.

He shrugged. "Now that I know a certain child may be trying to sneak out with them, I will have to find a better place."

"I don't understand what the big deal is," She said. "I didn't hurt anybody, least of all myself. Why teach me this thing that you don't want me to do?"

"I do want you to do it, but only when you need to." He looked over her head at the wall behind her, deep in thought. "To take a life is not something to be done lightly. I would like you to grow up to live in a world where nobody needs to die, but the world will not likely change that drastically in your lifetime. The number of times in the last few years I have been asked to help solve a murder case have convinced me of that."

"You've killed people before, right, dad?" She asked.

"Yes," He said, his voice perfectly level.

"Only when you needed to?" She asked.

"No."

"So--"

"I have done many things that I would prefer you not do," He interrupted. "Call me a hypocrite if you like, or go against my wishes if you like."

He knelt down and put his hands on her shoulders. She was tall enough that he needed to look up into her eyes when he knelt, now. "This world is a dark place. Every life is like a candle, struggling against that darkness. When you snuff out one of those candles, the world is made darker for it."

She thought for a moment. "So what about when one of those candles is going around snuffing out other candles? Should I try to be a candle that snuffs out candles that snuff out other candles? And if they're just unlit candles, can't they be relit?"

He paused. "I am not a philosopher," He said. "You have pushed the metaphor beyond its usefulness."

She smiled at her father and continued. "Where do new candles come from? Are the candles somehow making baby candles? Can you recycle the extinguished candles into new candles?"

"Perhaps that is the role of the gods," He said, and stood. "But I see you have no interest in candles or in my explanations."

"Sorry, I just--"

"Let me dispense with stories, and speak plainly," He said. "Murder is a sin, regardless of circumstances, even in self-defense or the name of justice. There are times when you must choose between committing one sin or another, and at those times, choose the lesser one when you can."

"So if someone's trying to kill me, and I kill them first, you're saying I've committed a sin?" She asked. "I don't think that's quite right, if the alternative is letting them kill me, instead."

He didn't blink. "It is a sin, but it would be a greater sin to allow yourself to be killed. If you are starving, and your neighbor is hoarding food, and you have failed in your attempts to get them to share it with you, then it is still a sin to steal their food. It would be worse to allow yourself, or your family, to starve to death. It would be worse to allow a murderer to walk the streets freely than it would be to imprison or execute them, but it is still a sin to imprison or execute a person."

"I don't think I can agree with that," She said, shaking her head. "It isn't right that other people's actions would put me in a position where every option I have is a sin, and I have to pick the lesser one."

"It is unfair," He agreed. "With luck, it will not happen to you as often as it happened to me."

"How old were you the first time you killed someone?" She asked. "Did you use your sword to do it?"

"Older than you, and yes," He said.

"Come on, you have to tell me the whole story if I ask you to," She reminded him.

"Yes, I do," He said. "I would ask that you not force me to tell you the story. I am not proud of it and do not enjoy thinking of it."

She paused. "Really? I would have thought--"

"I would have, too," He interrupted again. "At the time, my head was full of thoughts of glorious battles, honorable victories, and heroic deeds. Yet, at twenty-two years old, when I cut down my first victim, all I saw in front of me was the bloody corpse of a man, older than I was, who had a family who would miss him and would struggle to get by without him."

"I'm sorry," She said.

He closed his eyes and brought one hand up to rub his temples. "It is alright," He said at last. "We have spent enough time talking. Let us begin today's training."

"Wait, I have one last question," She said. "You didn't tell me yet how you knew I'd taken one of the swords. You changed the subject to lecture me about how killing people is wrong."

"What?" He asked, surprised. "If I tell you that, all it will do is help you to sneak them out without me realizing it next time."

She stared at him, unflinching.

He relented. "You cleaned and oiled it," He said. "Which is what I taught you to do every time you use a sword, and what I teach everyone to do, but most of the trainees here do not put in the proper amount of time and effort. They are rich children who do not care about learning what I have to teach, and they hurry their way through it so that they can go back to their normal lives. I could see that only one of the swords was properly cared for, and I knew the only student here who would put in the effort was you."

She stared at him, looking for signs that he was joking. "Seriously?"

"I am proud that you took my lessons seriously. However, you failed to blend in."

"So in the future, if I want to avoid suspicion, I should, what, not try as hard?"

"You should try extremely hard," he said, "to be aware of the level of those around you, and raise or lower yourself to match them. Please, enough getting me to teach you how to undermine me for today. We have wasted too much time."

"Don't worry," She said. "You won't catch me borrowing anything like that without permission again."

He sighed heavily, looked at the floor, and shook his head. "I know."

#text post #ratralsis writing #ratralsis short story

[i-ayladiary]

40 questions to get to know myself better

1: What do I love in my life?

- I love being in my world

2: What do I miss in my life?

- there is nothing I miss

3: What can I do to achieve this?

- would remain unanswered

4: Who are the people who make me happiest in life?

- sofia, enhypen

5: Where do I want to be in 5 years?

- in college, with my own house and my job

6: When can I be the best version of myself?

- never had

7: What do I love to do?

- dancing, sleeping, making plans, organizing my things, going out with friends, drinking.

8: What am I afraid of?

- of never being loved or never being happy

9: Can I improve some of my habits?

- all

10: What steps do I need to take to achieve my goals?

- planning and discipline

11: What brings me down?

- never being able to achieve my goals

12: How can I increase my happiness?

- greetings my goals

13: Am I doing everything I can to achieve my goals?

- no

14: What areas of my life can I improve?

- all

15: What are the 5 things I love about myself?

* planning ability

* imagination

16: What are the 3 limiting beliefs I need to remove from my life?

* that I don't deserve to be happy

* that things will naturally happen

* that I will never be loved

17: What will I accomplish in the next year?

- all the plans I made for him

18: How can I improve my daily routines?

- fulfilling them

19: How can I love myself more daily?

- meeting my goals

20: What can I do to practice self-care more?

- having discipline

21: What are the 5 things that truly make me smile?

* enhypen

* friends

* my imagination

* my music

22: What steps do I need to take to be the most confident version of myself?

* train public speaking

*train posture

* let go of my insecurities

* study what you say

23: How can I show more love and empathy for the people around me?

* fulfilling my duties

* detaching myself from my parents' quarters

24: What is my number one goal for next year?

- change who I am

25: If I could relive one moment, what would it be?

- if I could relive and have other choices I would go back to my 7 year old self

- if I could just relive moments I would go back to all the shows I watched

26: How would I describe a perfect day?

- spending the day alone with loud music and drinking, me making my own food and then sleeping after cumming

27: If I could travel anywhere in the world, where would I go?

- South Korea or Japan

28: If I could be anything in the world, what would I be?

- I would probably like to be a non-living being

29: How would I describe a perfect life?

- living in a comfortable house alone and without any kind of financial worries, where my parents would be happy without me and without money problems and I would have my freedom to come and go

30: What are the 3 things I most need to stop doing?

- stop victimizing me

- stop lying

- stop doing things I don't want to do

31: What are the 3 most positive things I should start doing?

- to study

- run after who I want to be

- stop trusting people

32: Who is my biggest inspiration and why?

- jay from enhypen, he is loved by everyone, he has a good heart and his parents are proud of him, he has no financial worries and has a job, he is handsome and intelligent

33: What things do I need to do frequently?

- to study

- self-care

- self knowledge

34: What do I need to forgive myself for?

- it wasn't my fault that I was introduced to pornography at such a young age

- It wasn't my fault my parents got divorced

- It's not my fault that I didn't have good opportunities or take advantage of the ones I had

35: What am I grateful for?

- because my father didn't give up on me even after everything

- for Sofia coming back into my life

- because I discovered kpop

36: What do I need?

- norrer

37: What are my priorities?

- to lose weight

- leave my parents' house

- change who I am

38: What are my goals for the next month?

- restart

39: What are my plans for this week?

- organize Christmas and suitcases

40: What are my plans for the next two years

- save money to leave home

- change my personality completely