onlyonewoman
OnlyOneWoman
Black Sails, Animal Kingdom TNT, Sons Of Anarchy and The Untamed fan fiction. An introvert who's careful when it comes to interacting with other people these days. I will not tell you my name or country. I'm just a nerd.
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THE BEANIE BARD
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Just to add something from my old 40+ year ass:
TikTok is a Chinese app.
China is most likely the MOST advanced dictatorship in the world.
The version of TikTok we're used to IS BANNED IN CHINA.
Why?
Because it's so highly addictive and preventing you from doing something useful with your time. There's a reason why the Chinese government encourages the global expansion of TikTok, while keeping it far away from it's own citizens.
Because it's brainrot.
Because the human brain isn't made to function through that amount of fast, relentless information about anything and everything for hours.
I hate TikTok.
Call me an old, grumpy alarmist but I work with kids from time to time and LET ME TELL YOU THERE'S BECOME A HUGE DIFFERENCE TO THE WORSE IN JUST A COUPLE OF YEARS.
TikTok is like giving yourself ADHD symptoms on purpose and there's just no way the Chinese government would accept to lose control over the young generation like that.
Please, for the love of Poseidon, out your phone down a bit.
Read a book - doesn't have to be new or "difficult", just something you'll enjoy to sink into.
You deserve that peace and happiness in your life, you know. A little corner just for you, without any notices, noises and filters.
And while we're at it: fuck instagram too.
The best thing about THIS (meaning tumblr) hellsite, is the lack of algorithms, selfies, annoying filters and people trying to explain a complex topic in a 30 sec video.
In terms of like, Please For The Love Of God Get Hobbies That Aren’t Scrolling Through An App For Six Hours A Day, I understand and experience completely the argument of like. with the stressors of modern work, you don’t have the energy at the end of the day to do anything but mindlessly watch Netflix and scroll through your phone. but like I would like to gently encourage you to simply force yourself for a time to do something instead of pick up your phone, bc the phone is literally designed to light up your brain with no effort from you whatsoever and it does in fact rot your brain. It makes literally anything but scrolling on your phone seem difficult and joyless. But if you stop scrolling on your phone all the time, and start like, reading or embroidering or gardening or going for walks, you will eventually find the joy in them once more
I understand and it is true that it is hard to have a life outside work and scrolling but there is not a near future where that won’t be the case and you should still live a life. And you won’t create a future where that isn’t the case if you don’t have the confidence and experience and drive to fight for it
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This is literally the first Friday in 2024 that I'm not physically and mentally exhausted from the weather.
16 weeks.
16 motherfucking WEEKS, of which at least 13-14 were just fucked up.
Then about 2 weeks of me sloooowly starting to realise it's spring, motherfuckers and my feet have HEALED.
Sure, I still have bruises, scrapes, chafed skin and a twisted knee and my neck is still a pain in the ass.
But IT'S SPRING YOU GUYS!
#winter is over#and i made it#roughed up but in one piece#i had forgotten about how being alive felt
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I mean... sure. Unless you're the Magda Goebbels loyal type.
Then we have a pretty huge fucking problem and it aint betrayal.
Loyalty is attractive
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I can't recall Saifah showing any sort of romantic or sexual interest towards anything or anyone in the show. Like, not even a longing look, let alone jealousy.
Unless I've missed something, in my second head canon (after Saifah/Chan), Saifah is aro ace and simply wants his horny brother to calm the fuck down and realise he can fuck without thinking with his dick and being in love without losing the rest of his brain capacity.
Like... just give Saifah a break, a drink and some stable friends who aren't horny and/or lovesick disasters.
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Xue Yang huffs and lands a half-closed glare at him.
“Maybe I'm just an unusually tolerant guy.”
Mingjue laughs. He genuinly loves Xue Yang's dark humour and wicked smile, his harsh comments, brutal honesty and odd softness. The self-awareness has a deep streak of bitterness to it, of all too many hopes crushed and with it, any real sense of safety.
Asking him to stay for real is unsafe and probably insane.
Losing him would be unbearable.
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He still almost did. Freeze to death.
And the rich motherfucker had been so rough, lost to the rush of whatever shit he'd shooted himself up with. He probably didn't understand how violent he was, meaning it was an accident and Xue Yang should've known better and also be grateful he's still alive.
He's not. People always said he's an ungrateful little shit who got what he deserved. He's twentyfour years old with the joints of an ancient man and no means to get himself going again – and he's supposed to be grateful.
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“You know, if I was your brother, you'd bet I would try and make me leave too, only I would've been way more mean about it.”
“Mean as in violent, I guess?”
“Lets just say my switchblade isn't in shitty condition from lack of use…”
“Have you ever killed anyone?”
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Mingjue is one of the, routinewise, most rigid and boring guys Xue Yang has ever spoken more than two words to, with his early mornings, early nights, meal prepping and workouts. He's so predictable a clock comes off as spontaneous.
He's also unbearably kind.
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The thing about being jealous over your brother's stupid crush is that it's all very ridiculous unless said brother is more or less the only family you've got. In the back of his mind, Huaisang knows he'll always come first to his dàgē, that Mingjue has sacrificed a lot to protect and make him happy over the years and that there are very few things he wouldn't do to help Huaisang if it really matters.
Unfortunately, dàgē doesn't want to get rid of the mangey stray either, because he feels responsible for him now that he's taken him in. (There might be some horniness in it too but that's too gross to think of.)
#niexue#nie mingjue#xue yang#nie huaisang#lan xichen#the untamed#fanfic#ao3#ao3feed#love#angst#jealousy#hurt/comfort
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Jealousy.
Huaisang once thought that was something reserved for people in romantic relationships, until Meng Yao pointed out that you don't have to be in love with someone to feel left out when they give attention to someone else than you.
A very unnecessary and insensitive comment, in Huaisang's opinion.
The skinny whore dàgē is bending over backwards for with his sickening looks and smiles and his:
Are you cold, baby? How's your hand, sweetheart? You need another blanket, A-Yang? is a fucking intruder who's trying to look frail and pathetic on purpose to have dàgē fawn over him all the time.
#xueming#xue yang#nie mingjue#nie huaisang#the untamed#ao3#ao3feed#fanfic#love#angst#jealousy#hurt/comfort
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“How long have you been staying now?”
We both know you're keeping count, you little fucker, Xue Yang thinks and gives him a little smile.
“Few weeks.”
“Your lease were up or something?”
“Or something, yeah.”
“Renting is expensive now, I guess.”
As in: you're mooching.
#xueming#xue yang#nie mingjue#nie huaisang#lan xichen#wen kexing#the untamed#fanfic#ao3#ao3feed#modern au
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I just started my little Easter week off. Six days without hard ass labour, a whiny boss, shitty weather and a fuckton of alarms.
Six days of NERDY STUFF and REST and SNACKS and BED and oh my fucking Zeus, I NEEEEED THAT.
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One good thing about getting older and having grown up partly without the Internet - and certainly without the extent of social media we have now - is that you could watch and read stuff with flawed characters without immediately jumping to the conclusion that:
The creators thought the bad traits of a character were morally good.
You should equate shitty behavior from a fictional character with a prompt to act like that yourself or excuse that shitty behavior in others in real life.
You should police and shame other people's personal preferences in media consumption publically, like a fucking HSA during the satanic panic, only ramped up like a squirrel on speed.
I have no problem with content that is clear about consent and who's good or bad, sometimes that take fits the story and characters well. A clear "this good, that bad" story is like comfort food or following a nice evening routine.
It serves our need to stay grounded and relax, which is very important, especially in a world where we're exposed to more daily impressions and personal choices than ever before in history.
I wish more young people kept in mind that ONE of the reasons why we're stressed, distracted and easily feel alone and/or watched, is that the consumation of literture, movies, tv shows, music etc. now almost never is a solo experience, which in turn robs us of some of the joy.
What I'm trying to say is that while it's good to reckognize shitty behavior in fictional characters - kudos to you youngsters who discover it earlier than we did - it doesn't make the one reading/watching/listening to a promoter of sexual assault, murder, gas lighting, bad sterotypes, shitty friends, non-existing communication etc.
Like, the worst "crime" I've committed is getting absurdly high library fines due to forgetting to return books in time. My worst behavior includes yelling in complete frustration and possibly tossing my own possessions around - which happens like once every five years. (Thanks emotion regulating meds!)
I'm a trusted animal caretaker and sometimes supervisor for minors. I'm on the organ donor list, I do volontary work, loves Studio Ghibli movies and if I see a cat, I stop dead in my tracks, hoping it will grant me the honor of petting it.
I also write hardcore porn sometimes.
One of my favourite movie characters of all time, is the killer Bill in Kill Bill and the fact that David Carradine died from erotic asphyxiation only makes him hotter.
I loved Marilyn Manson as Ron Tully in Sons Of Anarchy, because the role was just small enough to leave all the room for excellent prison fanfics - and I will go to my fucking grave claiming that Jax Teller was a way worse person than Ron Tully, without claiming that Tully was in any way a good person.
I can't watch the scenes in either Casino or Goodfellas, when Joe Pesci's characters die, because while his absolutely horrendous characters definitely deserve to die, the way it happens in both cases, plays with my own fear of betrayal.
I fear that plenty of younger people have been robbed of the wonderful experience of realizing they can't despise a bad character with the same ease they could as kids.
Yes, some films, movies, books etc. are like comfort food: no resistance, no surprices, less thinking and more feeling. And we need them!
We also need the type of media that shows grim reality with an easily defined enemy, like the nazis in Schindler's List, where there's no way we can identify with the nazis, but still have to balance on the edge with Schindler, who didn't care about the Jews at first, only his business.
We need characters like the despicable yet somehow also caring Aunt Lydia in The Handmaid's Tale, who in her own twisted way cares about the women she's set to control and keep in line. I myself find it impossible to wish her dead, not because she deserves a second chance, but because her lack of cruelty just for the sake of it, has shone through enough times to reveal she might be a vital key for the good in the end.
By being exposed to morally grey characters, we learn about ourselves and what we, as human beings, are capable of in extreme circumstances, whether it's good or bad.
I believe that with the literal fear of coming across as "toxic" or a promoter of shitty behavior by loving characters with awful behavior, makes people less interested in challenging media and thus, not building up an inner understanding for and capacity to deal with bad things and shitty people in real life.
And if you find yourself in a position where you feel like you can't handle characters who can be both monsters and human beings, it's no longer a content problem, it's a YOU problem.
Maybe you're not old enough to connect with certain characters or stories. Maybe you're not in the right mindset to watch/read it right now.
Maybe it's simply not something you find enjoyable at all.
All three are valid reasons to stay away from this kind of content.
What it isn't, is a reason to try and shame other people for taking a liking to it. Don't spend your 20's playing moral police online, pretending to be judge, jury and executioner for some stranger enjoying fictional criminals consentually fucking their rival criminal in chains in the basement.
We already know it's fiction, know perfectly well it's not an advertisement for healthy relationships and if YOU didn't understand that, you're simply not old and/or experienced enough to partake in that sort of content.
And if you ought to be old and mature enough to understand this, yet still get your panties in a twist when you come across, lets say, the vegaspete tag: just remember that had Scorsese wrote Kinnporsche, most of the characters aside from Porsche, would've ended up:
buried alive
shot in the neck
blown up
mutilated
or, at best:
living under secret identity for the rest of their lives, on the top of the Bangkok mobster death list
Goodfellas is still one of the best movies ever made and if the young people in the 90's could go and watch it without leaving the theatre thinking "yeah, lets start money laundring, doing blow and shooting friends in the head", I'm pretty damn sure today's youth can do the same.
#moral panic#it used to be a thing for old people#morally grey characters#they are the best#fiction is not reality#it can also help us cope with reality#if you can't handle it - don't consume it#fiction is not a promotion for being an asshole#and you should KNOW that
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Payu may be the dom, but Rain is playing him like my king Alexi Laiho (RIP) fingered his ESP.
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A part of me just thinks Chan and Saifah would be perfect for each other. (Sorry, Big, we pretend I'm not a bigchan shipper, for science!)
I mean, these men clearly are suffering.
Both of them surrounded by too many, too young, too lovesick guys who can't fucking communicate properly, behaving like teens (pouting and/or scowling and/or trying to act cool).
Who's been giving a single thought to THEIR poor sanity, huh?!
Where's the after work drinks in peace and quiet, far away from pining little shits?
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HIND RAJAB! SHE WAS 6 YEARS OLD!
HIND RAJAB! SHE WAS 6 YEARS OLD!
HIND RAJAB! SHE WAS 6 YEARS OLD!
HIND RAJAB! SHE WAS 6 YEARS OLD!
HIND RAJAB! SHE WAS 6 YEARS OLD!
HIND RAJAB! SHE WAS 6 YEARS OLD!
HIND RAJAB! SHE WAS 6 YEARS OLD!
HIND RAJAB! SHE WAS 6 YEARS OLD!
HIND RAJAB! SHE WAS 6 YEARS OLD!
HIND RAJAB! SHE WAS 6 YEARS OLD!
HIND RAJAB! SHE WAS 6 YEARS OLD!
HIND RAJAB! SHE WAS 6 YEARS OLD!
HIND RAJAB! SHE WAS 6 YEARS OLD!
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It’s a content warning to you. To me it’s the reason it’s on my reading list
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