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mcbenson25 · 3 months

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Better Together

Pairing: Rafael Barba x reader

Summary: Barba acts like he hates you because it's the only way he can keep his cool in your presence. Things come to a head and you call him out on it...

Warnings: cursing, Rafael is a bit of a dick at first. Use of nicknames (baby, cariño, querida, etc.). SMUT, oral (M and F receiving), unprotected sex (P in V)

A/N: Spanish translations in brackets/italics after each sentence.

cariño/querida: sweetheart/dear/darling/baby/etc.

por favor: please

qué: what

hermosa: beautiful/gorgeous

"Right...and what makes you qualified to make that determination?"

You glared at him. "Eight years of education and ten years of practice."

"Fine, but how long did you actually talk to him?" he countered.

"Four hours."

"So now you're an expert in his mental health?"

You groaned. "He belongs in a psychiatric facility, Barba. Not a prison."

"I disagree. He raped and murdered five women."

"I'm not defending his actions, but I'm telling you he's incapable of understanding the consequences of his actions."

"She's right, counselor," Olivia Benson cut in. "I got the same feeling she did when I first talked to him."

Rafael Barba let out an annoyed huff. "Fine. What do you propose?"

"Offer him a deal," she suggested. "Send him where he can get the help he needs."

Barba nodded, expression still slightly annoyed. "Fine." With that, he walked out of the precinct, presumably to go write up a deal.

As soon as he was out of ear shot, you turned to your friend and colleague. "He argues with me for ten minutes straight, but you tell him the same damn thing and he immediately agrees?"

Olivia shrugged. "You know how he is."

"Pompous, arrogant, rude, and downright insulting?"

She laughed. "All of the above, but he's also a pretty damn good ADA."

You sighed. "I would absolutely love to disagree with you, but you're not wrong. Part of me hates that he's so good at his job. And I hate his smug face and his attitude and those damn three piece suits he looks so goddamn good in," you finished your ramble with a groan.

"Maybe if you told him you thought he was hot, he'd be nicer to you," Olivia said with a wink.

"I hate you."

She laughed. "No you don't."

"Fine, I don't, but I will do no such thing. He quite clearly despises me."

"Does he?"

"Does who what?" Nick Amaro asked as he entered the squad room.

"Does Barba hate (Y/N)?" Olivia asked.

Nick chuckled. "Without a doubt."

"See?!" you said smugly.

Olivia rolled her eyes. "One of these days you're going to have to talk to him. Tell him off for being such an ass to you all the time."

"Now that I agree with," Nick cut in.

"If he pushes the right buttons, I will."

**********

Little did you know that two days later, Barba would push the exact right button.

Olivia, Nick, Amanda, Fin, and yourself were gathered in the squad room discussing your latest case. You had two dead girls in two days and 1PP was already breathing down your necks.

You were going over the profile with the team when Barba walked in. "I know it sounds crazy, guys, but I believe the perp is a girl...probably the same age as the victims."

"Why?" Fin asked.

As you started to explain your reasoning, to include the lack of sexual assault, the relationship between the two girls, and the anger clearly present in the attacks, Barba cut you off with a harsh laugh.

"You think a 10 year old girl is capable of inflicting that kind of trauma?" he interjected. "There's no way."

You took a deep breath in through your nose and exhaled from your mouth before responding. You needed those ten seconds to calm yourself so you didn't murder him. "Were you ever a 10 year old girl?"

He raised his eyebrows. "Obviously not."

"Are you a forensic psychologist?"

"Again, no."

"Have you been working violent sex crimes for 10 years?"

"No..."

"Then be quiet and listen," you finished harshly.

You'd never snapped at him quite so intensely before and he was taken aback. He was also very aware that he may have taken it a little too far this time. He'd made it a point to keep you at arm's length (or farther) for the past 6 months, and he was belatedly realizing he may have been too cruel.

You finished your profile, answering the questions posed by the rest of the squad, before everyone went about their assigned duties.

Barba announced he was going back to his office to update the DA and you were thankful to be rid of him.

"Maybe you were right, (Y/N)," Olivia said softly. "He either hates you or he hates shrinks."

"Likely both."

"I'm proud of you for clapping back," Amanda said warmly. "Someone's gotta put that guy in his place every once in a while."

You smiled mirthlessly. "Once this case is over, I may have more to say to him, but for now, let's focus on finding the person who killed those girls."

**********

Three days later and you had your suspect in custody. You'd been right in your assessment of the perp...it turned out to be a 10 year old girl who had been relentlessly teased and bullied by the two victims for an entire year. The girl finally snapped and killed them both in a blind rage.

After hearing all of the terrible things that had been done to her, you felt sorry for the girl. You understood why she'd killed those girls, even if you didn't condone it.

"Hey, (Y/N/N)," Fin called. "We're going out for drinks. My treat."

"I think I'll take a rain check guys...I've got something I need to do."

"Awww no fun," Amanda teased.

Olivia gave you a look, but you smiled at her reassuringly. She took it to mean you were okay, so she followed the others out.

You'd decided to pay a very special visit to a certain ADA...

You arrived at his office 20 minutes later, and you belatedly realized you probably should have checked to see if he was even there still. It was already after 6pm, but you hoped since he was a workaholic, he would be unaware of the late hour.

When you reached his office door, you found yourself taking a deep breath. You started to question yourself and whether this was a good idea, but then you thought about the way he'd been treating you and you got a burst of courage.

You knocked on his door and waited. You heard a slightly annoyed "Come in", so you opened the door and stepped into his office.

Barba looked up from the paperwork he was buried in, a look of surprise ghosting over his face. "Dr. (Y/L/N)...to what do I owe the pleasure?"

You shut the door behind you and took a step towards his desk. "Do you have a problem with me?"

"Excuse me?" he asked in surprise.

"Do you have a problem with me, specifically, or is it psychologists in general?"

"I don't have a problem with psychologists."

"So it's me, got it. Do you mind telling me what the hell I did to you?"

He had the grace to look sheepish. "You didn't do anything to me."

"Then why do you treat me like I'm some sort of imbecile?"

"I...I never intended to make you feel that way," he said honestly.

"Really? How did you intend to make me feel? You belittle me, insult my abilities and my intelligence, you're unnecessarily rude to me in front of my colleagues..." you trailed off.

He rose from his seat and came around the front of his desk. His expression was unreadable, but his shoulders had slumped slightly. If you didn't know better, you'd think he actually felt bad for the way he'd been treating you.

"You're right," he admitted. "I have treated you entirely unfairly."

It was your turn to look surprised. Out of all the things you'd expected him to say, an admission of guilt was certainly not one of them.

"I don't want you to think, for even a moment, that I don't think you're brilliant. You are the sharpest woman I have ever had the pleasure of meeting and you're downright phenomenal at your job."

You opened your mouth and closed it a few times before you could formulate a coherent response. "How in the hell was I supposed to know that?"

He blushed and cast his gaze to the floor. "I suppose there was no way for you to know, given the way I've treated you."

"Why, then?" you asked softly.

He sighed deeply and ran his hand over his face. "It's--complicated."

"Enlighten me, Barba. I've got time."

His green eyes raised back up to meet yours and you found yourself nearly breathless--and not for the first time. His eyes were beautiful, typically sparkling with whit and mischief; but in this moment, they shone with emotions so complex you couldn't begin to comprehend them.

"I never intended to be cruel to you, only distant. But I found that being aloof wasn't enough to keep you at bay--I needed something stronger. So...I started treating you as if I hated you. It was just easier, and perhaps safer."

"Safer?"

He nodded, but neglected to clarify. "Keeping you out of my life has become a necessity, Dr. (Y/L/N)."

His formality annoyed you, but you didn't comment on it. "Then why didn't you just tell me you didn't like me?"

He groaned and turned back to his desk to pour himself a glass of scotch. "Because it's not true, and I'm many things, but a liar isn't one of them."

"Okay, but you want nothing to do with me?"

"Exactly."

"You do understand how contradictory that sounds, correct?"

He took a long drink from his glass and leaned back against his desk. "It sounds moronic, yes, I am aware."

You debated your next words with care. You knew if you said what was on your mind, you might regret it, but you also knew if you didn't say it, you would regret it.

"When I met you, I was instantly intrigued by you," you began. "It was obvious you were highly intelligent, but you were also funny, charming, and impeccably well-dressed. It's a rare combination."

You crossed your arms and sighed. "At first, you were friendly and I quite liked you, but things between us turned icy in an instant. I didn't understand it then and I don't understand it now, but what I can tell you is it hurt me. It hurt me deeply, Barba, and it still does."

If he'd felt like an ass before, he felt 1,000 times worse now. "I never intended to hurt you," he said quietly. "You're a kind and loving soul...and you don't deserve to be treated the way I've been treating you."

"You're right," you whispered. "I don't."

He winced slightly and downed the rest of his scotch. "I am truly sorry, (Y/N). More than you'll ever know."

His use of your first name was not lost on you. You could count on one hand the number of times he'd said it and you'd reacted the same way each time. Your eyes fluttered closed for a moment, your breath caught, and your heart began to speed up.

Rafael had never noticed before...had never really paid attention to you the very few times he'd said your name, but he saw your reaction this time. For the first time since he'd met you, he began to wonder if you shared his feelings...

You quickly recovered yourself--praying he hadn't noticed. "I appreciate your apology." Your voice was slightly off pitch and you wanted to kick yourself for letting any emotion show.

"May I ask you something?" he said suddenly.

You nodded, not trusting your voice in the moment.

"You said what you thought of me when we first met--what do you think of me now?"

"Do you really want to know?"

He nodded.

You swallowed thickly. "Everything I said is true. You're a brilliant man and an even better lawyer...and you can be funny and charming, when you want to be. But that's not the Rafael Barba I get. I get the one reserved for the criminals and defense attorneys you dislike. The ones that make your skin crawl. You're pompous, arrogant, and cruel."

He closed his eyes tightly. Hearing you say what you really thought of him was much more painful than he'd anticipated.

"But I don't believe that's who you really are," you said so softly he almost didn't hear.

He looked back up at you in surprise.

"I think it's a facade you put up--a mask you wear to hide behind."

"What makes you think that?"

"Call it intuition, or perhaps training," you said with a shrug. "Either way, I am certain you really are the man I met in the beginning--not the man you've been the past several months."

"How could you have that much faith in me? After the way I've treated you..."

"Perhaps it's foolish...or maybe I just want it to be true."

He stared at you with a strange look on his face. It was as if he was trying to decide if you were playing him or being sincere. His expression slowly morphed as he realized you'd meant every word you'd said.

"May I be honest with you?" he asked.

"I want nothing less."

"Truthfully, I'm terrified of you. Absolutely, 100%, completely terrified."

Your jaw dropped slightly. Once again, he’d caught you off guard.

"You got under my skin the moment I met you and I haven't been able to get rid of you since. I've never felt like this--like I can't control my own actions or my emotions--and it's petrifying. I thought pushing you away would change how I felt, but it only intensified it. I think that's why I became crueler over time--I was angry at myself and angry with you for making me feel this way. It's not fair to you, I know, but it's the truth."

You were once again shocked to the core. You almost couldn't believe what you were hearing...if you weren't so good at reading people, you'd be convinced he was lying, but as it stood, you knew it was the raw, painful truth.

"You can't control everything, you know," you said quietly.

He laughed harshly. "God, how I wish I could."

"What are you so afraid of?"

He took a moment to answer, but once he did, the words poured out of him. "I'm afraid the way I feel about you will ruin both of our careers. I'm afraid that once you see the man behind the mask, you'll run and leave me broken. I'm afraid that we'll fall apart...that we won't stand the test of time. I'm afraid of falling so deeply in love with you that I lose myself completely. But most of all, I'm afraid that I've already screwed this up beyond repair."

For all your education and all the eloquent words you've learned in your lifetime, you found yourself stunned into complete and utter silence. No words came to mind, no coherent thoughts emerged. You stared at him and he stared at you, as the silence dragged on.

After what had to be an eternity, Rafael spoke again. "Please say something. Anything. Tell me you hate me. Tell me you never want to see my face again. Tell me you'd rather jump off a building than be with me--"

"Stop!" The intensity of your demand silenced him. "Just stop talking…I…I can't find the words I want to say, but I do know one thing: I'm not afraid."

Out of all the things you could have said, all the beautiful sentences you could have strung together, those three words were the perfect response. Fueled with sudden courage, Rafael crossed the space between the two of you in three long strides, coming to a stop a few inches from you.

With a shaking hand, he gently stroked your cheek. "May I?" he asked quietly.

Your pretty (y/e/c) eyes met his and you softly begged, "Please."

He leaned into you, lips pressing against yours with soft insistence. The kiss ignited something within you--a desire so deep and powerful it almost frightened you. You grabbed ahold of his suspenders and tugged his body closer to yours as you deepened the kiss.

Rafael moaned softly against your lips, tongue pressing forward, requesting access. You obliged, lips parting to allow him entry. His hands traveled down your soft curves until they landed on your hips. He used his gentle strength to pull you flush against him, his own body backed up against his desk to support him.

You could feel his need for you in his kiss, in his touch...and in his pants. His growing erection was pressed against you, so close to where you wanted him, yet so far away.

Rafael broke the kiss for a moment. "Carmen left for the day."

"Mhmm," you hummed in response.

"But I don't want our first time together to be on the couch in my office."

"How 'bout the desk?" you teased lightly.

He groaned. "Don't think I haven't imagined it, but I'd like to take you home...do this properly--in a bed."

You stared at him for a moment. "If we stay here, it can be casual, unassuming. If I go home with you...that changes everything."

"I don't want casual. I don't want a fling. I want you--and everything that comes along with that."

You studied him closely before responding. You noted the sincerity in his voice and his expression and decided to--for once--allow your heart to lead your decision. "Take me home, Rafael," you whispered.

He breathed deeply, as if trying to control himself. It appeared that you had the same effect on him as he did on you when you called him by his first name.

He didn't say a word--you weren't even sure he could have if he'd wanted to. He simply grabbed his jacket, took your hand, and practically dragged you to the elevator. Once outside, he hailed a cab and helped you into the backseat before sliding in beside you.

As the cab began to move, you rested your hand on Rafael's thigh. He glanced at you, but didn't say anything. You were feeling bold, so you slid your hand slowly up his thigh, inching closer to his evident arousal.

When your fingertips brushed against his clothed cock, he hissed slightly. He leaned over to whisper into your ear so the cab driver wouldn't hear. "Careful, querida. O puedo perder el control [Or I may lose control]."

You inhaled sharply--something about his tone mixed with the hushed Spanish words, sent a jolt of pure arousal straight to your core.

Your reaction didn't go unnoticed by Rafael. He smirked as he discovered one of your kinks. He tucked the knowledge away for later use.

You managed to behave yourself for the rest of the short ride to his apartment, but once inside the building, all bets were off.

His lips were on yours the moment the elevator doors slid closed, pressing your body firmly against the wall. Your fingers tangled in his hair, messing up the perfect locks.

As the elevator dinged and the doors began to open, you reluctantly pulled away from each other. You saw the desperation in his beautiful green eyes and you knew the same look reflected in yours.

He wasted no time guiding you to his apartment and the moment you were both inside, he had you spun around and pressed up against the door.

“Querida,” he whispered hungrily against your lips, fingertips dancing under your shirt.

You moaned softly as you tugged harshly on his suspenders, pushing them out of the way so you could remove his shirt.

Within moments, your clothes and his were strewn across the house as he carried you to his bedroom, nothing left between you but underwear.

Rafael tossed you gently onto the bed before climbing on top of you. He eyed you hungrily—sprawled out beneath him, desire evident on your face.

“You are perfect, hermosa.”

You blushed. “Rafa…”

He groaned. “Fuck. Don’t do that.”

Confusion clouded your expression. You didn’t think you’d done anything wrong…

He’d closed his eyes and his face gave away the internal struggle he was experiencing.

Realization suddenly crossed your features and you grinned. You gently raked your nails down his chest as you murmured the nickname again, “Rafa.”

His eyes shot open and he rutted his hips against yours, mouth pressing wet kisses to your heated skin. His teeth nipped at your neck and collarbone, leaving love bites in his wake.

He was taking his time with you. Wanting to explore every part of you, taste every inch of your skin, catalogue every detail in his mind.

You whimpered softly, not used to such attention, nor such deliberate slowness. “Rafael, please.”

He looked up at you with his trademark smirk. “You ever been with a Hispanic man before, Cariño?”

You blushed and shook your head.

His smirk widened. “We like to take our time, make sure our lady is properly loved and appreciated. This is about your enjoyment, (Y/N/N), not mine.”

“I want you to enjoy yourself too…”

He kissed you gently. “You keep making those pretty sounds for me, querida, and I promise you, I’ll enjoy myself.”

You found yourself unable to respond as he continued his slow descent towards your core. Each gentle caress of his lips against your skin seemed to set your nerve endings on fire--the need within you growing exponentially.

You whined prettily, hips shifting upwards, desperately seeking his lips where you needed them most. "Please," you begged.

You didn't know it yet, but Rafael would never deny you--not in the real world, nor the bedroom. The moment he heard your soft voice begging, he glanced up at your face. You already looked so far gone--your hair was a mess, your lips swollen, your cheeks flushed, and your breathing was ragged. He smiled to himself as he lowered his head, giving you no time to adjust as he dove into you with abandon.

You gasped as the pleasure threatened to overwhelm you. As skilled as the man between your legs was in the courtroom, he was even better suited with his mouth hungrily devouring you.

In the span of mere minutes, he'd turned you into a gasping, moaning mess--every one of your senses overwhelmed with feeling.

"Rafa--I--I'm close," you gasped.

He hummed against you, lips wrapping around your clit to increase his assault. His fingers dug into the flesh of your hips, holding you in place as he sped up his ministrations.

Your jaw dropped as a flurry of sounds--some of which were intended to be his name--slipped from your lips. Your orgasm sent wave after wave of intense pleasure through your body, but that pleasure soon turned to sensitivity.

"Rafa, too much--" you whispered as you tried to pull away from him.

He laid his arm across your lower belly, effectively holding you in place as his mouth continued to work you. His eyes flicked up to yours to check if you really did want him to stop, but your head was already thrown back, chest rising and falling rapidly as the familiar knot tightened in your stomach.

The moment your cries turned to moans and pleas to continue, Rafael stopped and lifted his head. "Did you want me to stop, querida?"

"No!" you cried loudly, fingers grasping his hair in an attempt to guide him back where you wanted him.

He smirked as he complied with your direction, lips and tongue once again sending you into a spiral of pleasure you'd never experienced before.

As you came down from your second high, Rafael finally slowed his assault and allowed you to pull his head up when it became too much.

He placed soft kisses against your heated skin, gently soothing you as the aftershocks shuddered through your body. His lips traced the curves of your face with gentle affection until your breathing had begun to normalize.

Rafael kissed you deeply, desire evident in the action. In response, your hand slowly descended down his chest and abdomen, until you reached his throbbing cock. You lightly ran your nails across the still clothed member, enticing a groan from the man above you.

You teased him for a few more seconds before sliding your hand beneath his boxer briefs and palming his cock in your warm hand. He groaned loudly--hips rutting against your hand instantly.

"I wanna taste you," you murmured against the shell of his ear.

"You don't have to..." he said softly.

There was something in his voice that caused you to pull away so you could see his face properly. He looked worried and perhaps a little apprehensive.

"But I want to," you reassured him.

"You do?"

You nodded. "It's something I enjoy very much, Rafa, so if you're okay with it, I would really like to suck your cock."

His eyes closed briefly and he moaned softly, forehead dropping against yours. "Por favor," he begged in a broken voice.

You grinned ear to ear. "Stand up."

"Qué?" he asked in confusion.

You nudged him gently and tilted your head towards the edge of the bed. "Stand up, handsome."

He did as you asked and watched in surprise as you lowered yourself to your knees on the floor in front of him. He felt like he needed to remind you again that you didn't need to do this for him, but when he saw the hunger in your eyes, he fell silent.

You slowly dragged his underwear down, freeing his cock from its constraints. You were a little surprised by his size--he was longer than average and quite thick--but surprise quickly turned to hunger.

You looked up at him, a playful smirk dancing on your lips, and all his worries faded away. It was obvious you wanted this...perhaps just as much as he did.

You wasted no time in wrapping your mouth around his cock, taking as much of him into your mouth as you could, eyes never leaving his face.

You gagged slightly as he hit the back of your throat, but you pushed past it, determined to provide him with as much pleasure as you could muster.

As you began to move, his fingers intertwined in your hair and his hips stuttered forwards occasionally. You knew what he needed, but it was clear he wasn't going to do it without some prodding.

You pulled off of him with a *pop* and waited until his heavily lidded eyes met yours. "Rafael, I want you to enjoy this."

"I am, cariño," he said in confusion.

"Not as much as you could be." You licked the tip of his cock for emphasis and his hips jumped slightly. "I want you to use my mouth for your own pleasure, Rafa. That's what it's there for."

He shook his head rapidly. He'd been expressly told not to do that by several women before you.

You rubbed his thighs reassuringly. "I want this, baby. Please," you begged. "Please fuck my mouth."

The moment the words were out of your mouth, you sucked his cock back into the warmth of your lips, hoping he would take you seriously. You pressed yourself forward, pushing past the gag reflex to take his entire member into your mouth.

Without hesitation, you began to guide his hips, urging him to give in and take what he wanted--what he needed.

You flicked your gaze up to meet his and nodded your head as best you could, hands still encouraging him to move. He very tentatively began to move his hips and you smiled, fingers digging into his thighs.

When you didn't pull away, he started to put a little more force into the movements. When you still didn't pull away, he sped up, fingers wrapping in your hair to keep you still.

You let him take control, eyes still trained on his face. He slowly began to thrust in earnest, fucking your mouth like it was his favorite place to be. You watched his head fall back, moans of intense pleasure leaving his lips.

You held onto him and focused on breathing as you let him use you. A few minutes passed before his hips began to stutter and you knew he was close.

You prepared to swallow everything he had to give you, but he surprised you by pulling away, your mouth coming off of him with a *pop*.

His breathing was ragged and his eyes were wild--pupils blocking out the brilliant green. "I need you," he said, voice raw and husky.

You understood his meaning and quickly crawled back onto the bed. He was on top of you almost immediately, lips latching onto your neck, teeth nipping at your flesh.

His cock rubbed against the outside of your pussy and you both groaned.

"Fuck," he mumbled. "Do I need a condom?"

"Pill," you gasped as you shook your head. "Wanna feel you fill me up, Rafa."

He let out a low growl and his eyes turned even more feral. He gave you no warning as he plunged his cock deep inside of you, stretching you in ways you'd never been stretched before.

"Rafael!" you cried out at the sensation.

Normally he would have forced himself to give you time to adjust, but his mind was too far gone. He set a brutal pace almost instantly and you were simply along for the ride.

There were so many new sensations that you were having a hard time staying focused. Everything just felt so incredible.

Your pussy throbbed around him, pulling him in even deeper. "Te sienetes muy bien, querida." [You feel so good, sweetheart.]

You moaned loudly, nails digging into his back as you arched against him.

"Te gusta cuando te hablo español, ¿no?" he growled into your ear. [You like it when I speak Spanish to you, don't you?"]

"Yes!" you gasped.

"Chica sucia," he chuckled darkly. [Dirty girl.]

"Rafa, please--I'm so close."

He groaned. "Quiero que vengas conmigo, cariño," he mumbled. [I want you to cum with me, sweetheart.] "Can you do that for me?" he asked in English.

You nodded your head rapidly.

"Esa es mi buena chica," he praised. [That's my good girl.]

You moaned lowly, preening at his praise. He smiled and picked up his pace, not wanting to stop until he felt you fall apart. "So close," he mumbled.

"Don't--stop!"

He knew you were close--could tell by the way your pussy fluttered around him--so he whispered, "Cum for me, baby."

You cried out as your orgasm hit you with more force than either of the two you'd had earlier. Rafael groaned your name as he spilled his seed within you, filling you up as your walls milked him dry.

You both began to come down from your highs, the intensity of your orgasms taking the wind out of both of you. Rafael pulled out and collapsed beside you, completely spent and satiated.

"That was pretty decent," you said between breaths.

He snapped his head in your direction and started to laugh when he saw the mischief in your eyes.

You grinned and joined in on his laughter, allowing him to wrap his arms around you and pull you closer to him.

"Very decent," he muttered against your hair.

You laughed again. "'Fucking incredible' would be a more accurate description."

"I couldn't agree more." He sighed softly. "I don't wanna move."

"Who says we have to?"

"We probably should...we do have work in the morning after all."

Your body tensed slightly and he felt it, realizing how his previous statement may have sounded. "I want you to stay, querida. I'm just saying we should probably get up and shower before we fall asleep."

You relaxed. "You may have to carry me."

He chuckled and dragged himself out of bed, pulling you along with him. He scooped you up despite your protests and carried you to the bathroom, placing you on the counter while he started the shower.

"I was kidding, Rafa!"

He smiled. "If my girl can walk immediately after sex, then I did something wrong. I'm always happy to carry you."

You smiled back at him, realizing he was completely serious. You watched him quietly, completely lost in thought.

"Where's your mind, querida?" he asked softly.

You shook your head, clearing your thoughts. "I'm happy...that's all."

Rafael kissed you gently. "Me too, hermosa. Now come on, let's get you cleaned up."

Once you were both clean and dry, he carried you back to his bed and laid you down gently before crawling into the bed beside you. He tugged you in closely against his chest and you sighed contentedly.

"Go to sleep, cariño. I'll be here in the morning when you wake up."

Somehow he seemed to know exactly what you needed to hear. Knowing he wasn't going anywhere and feeling his strong arms wrapped around you, allowed you to feel a calm peace you'd not felt in years.

Within minutes, you'd drifted off to sleep in his arms. Just before he fell asleep too, Rafael kissed the top of your head and whispered, "Te adoro con locura." [I adore you madly.]

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mcbenson25 · 3 months

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Unbecoming [Obi-Wan Kenobi]

Summary: There are a million and one reasons why he should give you up, but the heart wants what it wants. And what the heart wants is unbecoming of a Jedi.

Pairing: Obi-Wan Kenobi x f!reader

Warnings: Angst! Mutual Pining, fluff, slow burn, forbidden romance, Obi-Wan has a crush and he doesn't know what to do, Angst With A Happy Ending.

Word Count: 9.7k (wow... just... damn...)

A/N: I had to go back and watch a few episodes of The Clone Wars and then make a whole playlist for this one because it is so daunting to write a character as complex as Obi-Wan. Hence why it took so long. This man honestly intimidates the fuck out of me, I'm sorry.

Obi-Wan was not in a particularly good mood today. He never was upon being tasked to look after you. Mostly because you never seem to listen to him.

“Commander Cody.” he speaks up as he approaches the clone soldier.

He sighs, shaking his head. “She’s still collecting samples, Sir.”

“Yes, I figured as much.” he retorts with a deep exhale.

Obi-Wan walks ahead of him into the field of wheat. Or rather, what was left of it. A new pest had utterly obliterated the rich, golden field. The fields have been cut short, yellow stems either eaten or laying upon each other.

There wasn’t much left. One or two lands of pastures wouldn’t have been that much cause for concern, but all of them. And not just the wheat. Maize, barley, rice, and every other field crop have been strategically targeted and violently ravaged by this vicious pest.

It wasn’t blatantly obvious that this was the work of the Separatists. But why else would everything suddenly go wrong when you come into power after the death of your father?

The Senate had done nothing. They were too concerned with fighting a war on the other side of the galaxy, which meant that not many troops could be sent to aid your planet in its time of need.

It doesn’t help that your own people all hate you either. And it is no fault of your own. With your father being a Separatist, he wasn’t exactly the kindest leader. Therefore, by extension, you are seen as an extension of his tyranny. Hardly being given the chance to rule and backed into a corner, you’ve had nearly countless assassination attempts on your life.

Which ultimately forced the Jedi Council to step in. your planet’s trade routes were too important to be handed back to the Separatists. Your life was too important to lose.

“You should be inside the castle, Senator.”

You don’t bother to look behind you as you work. The only indication that you heard him was the slight hesitation in your hands as you collected specimens of half-eaten wheat. You continue your task without a word offered to him.

And for a moment, Obi-Wan has to stop to look at you.

You were nothing like the Senator he expected you to be. Today, you were clad in overalls, boots and gloves. Your hair had been neatly tucked under a sun hat, despite the weather being gloomy with a chance of rain.

It is nothing like the elegant dresses and intricately patterned gowns you would often wear to functions and events. The robes that would flow down the length of your legs and swing at your toes when you walk. And the jewellery, rings on your fingers, bracelets adorning your wrists and necklaces hanging on your skin and flower crowns placed on your head as accessories.

Obi-Wan had never cared much for such items. He was a simple man with simple needs. But even he could not deny that all of these small things only accentuated your beauty beyond measure.

Yet this seems to be the highlight of his day. You, in an overall.

All he wants is to see more of you. Have more of this. He shouldn’t want more.

He shouldn’t.

It goes against everything he has been taught–

“My problems simply won’t vanish if I am locked inside a golden cage, General Kenobi.”

You lift a single strand of wheat to inspect. It is then placed inside a glass tube and sealed shut. You collect a few more. Each one goes in a large container with metal handles on the sides. You were meticulous with your process. Something that he has always admired. Never leaving things up to chance and taking charge when you feel as though no one else is going to do it right.

Or simply because you don’t trust anyone else to handle some things. It wouldn’t be the first or last time someone tried to sabotage you.

But with each second that passes, Obi-Wan feels more of his patience draining. You make no move to hurry. By now, you should already be back in the castle, where it is safe.

There have been multiple attacks on your life already. Each one is more alarming than the last, yet you seem completely unfazed by that fact because you continue to prance around outside secured perimeters whenever you feel like it. Brazenly, if he is being honest.

“Why must you insist on being difficult?” Obi-Wan’s exasperated voice does nothing to stop you from collecting more specimens. His hands go to his hips as he continues, “Is it absolutely necessary for you to break protocol every chance you get? A strict routine is in place to keep you safe.”

“A strict routine is suffocating and it does nothing to help with the fact that there is someone out there tampering with this planet’s ecosystem and I cannot do anything to stop that from behind castle walls.”

Obi-Wan’s nose flared. Why was it so easy for you to get under his skin? He swears you’re worse than Anakin and you do it with far less effort.

He waits for you to face him. To insist on staying outside longer a little longer, even though the clouds grow eerily darker. He would take no pleasure in denying you, for it is important to you and to your people, but he must bring you back inside where it is safe. Where you cannot be harmed.

Deep down, no amount of Jedi training would prevent him from loathing himself if he allowed anything to happen to you.

“Senator–”

When your eyes meet his –finally– he regrets ever desiring to see them. Or rather, the cold storm within them.

“My people are dying and no one is going to help me, General. No one.” He falls silent at the tone laced with your harsh truth. “The Republic does not trust me, the Separatists are trying to kill me and I am hated by my own people.”

He knows this. All too well.

You can barely walk the busy streets of the city without a few sneering at you or spitting on the ground near your feet. After you became Senator, after your parentage had been revealed, you spent more time in the company of the flowers in the garden or the trees of the forest.

It was unfair. You were the perfect Senator. You had done nothing wrong, and yet you were blamed for someone else’s legacy of a long-standing dictatorship.

“Still.” His voice was lowered, softer. “You must come back inside before the Separatists make another attempt on your life–”

“Have you not heard a word I said?” This was the first time your indifference cracked.

“I have heard.” he said. “But I’m afraid I cannot risk your life. You may very well be the tipping point of this war–”

You scoff, rolling your eyes as you mutter lowly, “This war…”

You look to the darkening skies for respite with a heavy sigh.

Somehow, you are not surprised. The Republic seems to want to hold you in such high regard for your role in this war. You are, apparently, a beacon of hope for them. Which would make you happy, if they didn’t treat you like you are going to stab them in the back like your father did.

Obi-Wan isn’t any better. He may trust you enough not to align yourself with the Separatists, but you don’t think he knows that you have spent enough time away from your father to not be anything like him. You don’t think he knows that you truly want what is best for your people and you want to completely untether them from the Separatists’ influence.

You don’t think he knows the guilt you carry or how hard you work to shred yourself of it.

He is a Jedi. He’s been conditioned from a very young age to not care too deeply and to not get too emotionally involved in a situation or with people. You don’t expect him to understand.

“You are a soldier.” you began, watching his expression shift. “All you concern yourself with is ending this war without worrying about how the casualties feel about your decisions.”

He looked thoroughly offended by your words. “I am not a soldier, I am a peacekeeper–”

You scoffed, waving your hand away dismissively as you plucked the container filled with test tubes of chopped wheat and soil samples from the ground. “Peacekeeper, Jedi– it’s all the same to me.” Some part of Obi-Wan shrinks sorrowfully under the weight of your nonchalant words. “Because you know nothing of devotion, except to your Maker-forsaken Jedi Code.”

It was a low blow. The most spiteful you’ve been toward him. Yet, somehow the most truthful thing you have said to him ever since you met him.

You walk past him with your clear box, completely unbothered by the scowl on his face.

“How dare you.”

His sharp rebuttal halts you in your tracks. You barely turn to find his eyes once more. Your own are still filled with ice, nearly drowning the fire in his soul. You both glare at each other in silence.

“General.” Cody steps between you and him. “Senator.”

Neither one of you acknowledge him. The tension was palpable enough to make him sweat under his helm. This was the first time you openly and firmly spoke up against Obi-Wan’s presence.

He glances between both of you nervously but continued, “Arguing is not going to help.”

A chill ran down Obi-Wan’s spine because your eyes narrowed into slits. Your energy was as gloomy as the clouds, unrelenting. You don’t move. You don’t falter. Your disdain for everything Obi-Wan stands for permeates into the very earth you walk upon and he feels it.

He remembers his teachings. To never let fear overrule him. For it leads to hatred and anger. For it leads to the Dark Side.

And at that moment, through your hatred for the way you have been treated by the Senate and the Republic and even your own people for your father’s mistakes, there is that fear. You may hide it well, but it is ever so present. Yet somehow, through everything you’ve been put through, you still try to be everything your father was not.

You half turn, barely glancing at the armed man, the test tubes in your container clinking as you move. It spans the width of your waist, the insignia of your family marking its translucent face. Obi-Wan had almost offered to carry it for you, but he has a feeling that you would not accept his help at the moment.

“You’re right, Commander Cody.” Your smile grates both men the wrong way. “Perhaps if General Kenobi did not nag me every chance I step outside, I would collect samples much faster and more efficiently.”

You hardly give either one of them a chance to respond because you’re already marching back to the castle. One of your guards trails loosely behind you at a respectable distance, clearly attuned to how upset you are.

Obi-Wan has half a mind to follow you, to dispute your logic and what you think of him. Because your opinion of him, however low it is, doesn’t sit well with him. Your words made something in his chest tighten considerably.

Cody holds an arm in front of him, shaking his head.

“Give her a break, General.” he says. “She’s got her back against the wall. Hovering over her every minute is not going to help.”

He hates that his friend is right. Obi-Wan looks to your retreating figure, a deep frown etching across his lips.

He nods to the Commander. “You’re right, Cody. Thank you.”

It had barely been a few years since you sat upon your father’s throne. Leader of your people. Senator. Sometimes, the word sneers in your head with disgust whenever you think about it.

Before that, people knew you as the girl who worked as a medical assistant. You had kept your identity a secret from everyone outside the castle walls for as long as you could because you wanted to know a life outside of your father’s watchful eye.

“At this rate, the Senator and the Count are going to run our home to the ground.”

You had friends who hated your father and everyone who surrounded him. And they had every right to. The blatant corruption was slowly, but painfully bleeding every village, town and city dry of its resources. Food and water became more and more scarce. Medical supplies were rare.

Starvation, dehydration and diseases ravaged the people and they’ve had enough of it. So they had him killed when the opportunity presented itself. Only when he stepped out of his high walls, a castle built from the blood, sweat and tears of the people, and only when he was far enough did they strike.

And they struck hard.

No love was lost when your father was assassinated, but a lot of it vanished when you were backed into a corner to sit on the throne. It was either you or Count Dooku and you would’ve rather be struck by lightning before you let a Sith break your people even more than they already were.

Not that the people knew or believed you when you told them this. But you still fight every day to keep your planet and all of its resources from the Separatists.

You sighed after writing down your observations for the specimens you collected. Rubbing your eyes for the fifth time didn’t seem to help ease your exhaustion. You would lower the lights in the laboratory if you didn’t need to accurately record what you were doing.

It’s become your safe haven ever since you moved back into the castle. The sterile air had grown on you and became soothing once you became used to it. You looked forward to entering the white walls and walking upon the squeaky clean floors. Each counter with microscopes, Petri dishes, test tube racks, beakers, flasks, and other materials waiting for you to utilize them.

You locked yourself away from the rest of the world hours ago. Obi-Wan had made attempts to come to see you a few times, but you hadn’t given him clearance for that. It’s hard not to say you didn’t enjoy denying him that privilege. He must be so used to getting access to every detail because of him being a Jedi Knight.

You do, however, feel guilty for snapping at him. With all that has been piling on you to keep everything afloat, it was bound to happen and he just happened to be in your line of fire.

That is why when you found him walking down the foyer, your own words caught in your throat when you thought of how badly you’d been treating him for the last few days when he’s been nothing but cordial.

He looked out of place. He always did. Next to you, he was an oddity. A man in rough cotton in a sea of silks and satin, in a castle of cream marble and gleaming gold. He might have blended in more in the gardens as a traveller seeking adventure.

Perhaps that is why he seems more comfortable outside than in here.

You quietly fell in step beside him. To your credit, if he was surprised by your presence, he chose not to show or comment on it. He says nothing as you both walk together. And it made you feel worse.

“I’m sorry.” you speak up, glancing at him. “For my harsh words earlier.” His eyes meet yours, seemingly almost surprised. “I tend to be callous when I am upset, I apologize for that.”

Obi-Wan considers you for a moment. You think he might throw your apology back in your face and tell you to get lost. However, that is not the case.

“It’s alright.” he smiles gently, as your shoulder bumps his. “It’s not your fault.”

The sincerity in his eyes prickles something in your chest and you have to hold the feeling at bay.

You’re unsure if he truly means that.

Everything has always been your fault. Even what your father did. You don't think anyone has ever told you otherwise, even if they dared to believe it.

The corners of your eyes sting. You had to clear your throat and keep it together.

A moment passes before he inquires, “Did you find anything on the samples you’ve collected?”

“Nothing, thus far.” you sighed, looking forward as you shove your hands inside the pockets of your lab coat. “I need to see the exact pest that caused this kind of damage. I’ve heard it’s quite large.”

There isn't much to go on with what you've gathered so far. It comes as no surprise to you because nothing ever comes easy in your life.

All of the samples you’ve collected so far, of the pests that are devouring your people’s farms, have been found dead from being shot down by the Clones. This thing has been resistant to all of the pesticides that have already been developed and although you weren’t keen on using them in the first place, the rapid decline of crops didn’t give you much of a choice.

Not that it worked anyway. But having a live specimen could help you determine what makes it tick.

“You haven’t seen it?” Obi-Wan asks.

You don’t know if you should tell him. Will he put you down for not finding evidence to support your arguments the way everyone else has?

“No.” You shake your head, crossing your arms as you lean back on the lush couch. Your eyes trail over the patterns of the wall. “Apparently, they attack mostly during the night and well…”

He won’t allow you to go anywhere after the sun has set. Mostly because he knows you. And he knows Padmé Amidala.

And if there is one thing he knows that the two of you have in common, it is your relentless insistence on putting yourself at risk for a good cause.

“Ah…” Obi-Wan’s cheeks blaze brightly as he lowers his eyes. “My apologies.”

Now it makes sense why you gave him hell the first few days. He suspects that you would’ve had a much easier time getting your own people to like you if he hadn’t gotten in the way of your pursuit.

The guilt nearly chokes him when he comes to this realization.

And before he could truly ruminate on the idea, he speaks, “But I could try to obtain one for you, if it would help you with your research.”

You halt immediately, shocked by his suggestion. It’s only brief, as when he realizes that you weren’t walking beside him anymore, you moved briskly to his side once more to keep up.

You hadn’t thought to tell the Master Jedi about your pursuit. Years of not trusting anyone with helping you lead you to build walls higher than that of your father’s castle.

You cleared your throat. “Well, if it’s not too much trouble, a live specimen would be best.”

“Live specimen.” He nods with his hand to his chin, as if mulling over the idea. “Should be simple enough.”

He speaks as if it is not something monumental to you. A specimen would be a huge help. It would most definitely shift the tides in your favour.

Providing evidence that these pests were a product of the Separatists, a ploy in trying to keep your people under their control. With that proven fact, you would gain the support of the Republic and the Senate and perhaps, a breath of relief.

No one has ever been able to watch just one of these creatures and yet Obi-Wan treats it like an easy task. Either he does not realize that he underestimates the Separatists or he overestimates his own abilities. You are not sure of either.

Yet, either way, you appreciate the fact that he's willing to try.

For you.

Your silence draws his attention. He raises an eyebrow. “What?”

“Nothing, I…” you pause, wondering if it was worth finishing your train of thought and deciding against it. “It’s nothing.”

If it was nothing, then why the flutter of your heart?

You're going to drown yourself in paperwork to forget about it.

It was, in fact, not easy at all.

Obi-Wan and his small task force planned to ambush the hoard in the dead of night, as they were known to be the most active around that time. What was supposed to be a simple mission turned into an absolute nightmare.

It took hours of staking out a maize farm to finally stumble upon them. Three hours of nighttime rain and hardly a damn thing in sight before someone radioed in and reported a sighting of them in another nearby farm. And a few agonizing minutes of trying not to get bitten by the ones that attacked in self-defence when the squad tried to approach them.

Eventually, it was worth the wait.

“Why are these critters so massive?” Anakin cringed as he is barely able to hold down the screeching creature.

Commander Cody helps him when its squirms increase, huffing and speaking through gritted teeth, “Well, I suppose they were designed to topple an entire planet’s food supply within weeks so they need to have a large appetite.”

“Hence their ridiculously large size.” Anakin finishes for him, nose crinkling.

You were right to worry the way you do.

Even without the use of a microscope, Obi-Wan can tell that these things were genetically modified. Their abnormal size was a testament to that.

Yet, upon seeing them, he was glad he had made the call to not allow you to come after them yourself. You could’ve been seriously harmed. Or worse.

The thought doesn’t sit well with him. He can’t think of a reason why, besides the obvious. Your death could tip the scales in the Separatists’ favour and hence, prolong the war, but that’s not it. That’s not what troubles him when he thinks about letting your life be snuffed out like a candle.

He suspects it’s because he's spent too much time watching over you.

He’s grown too used to keeping track of your steps. Watching the flow of your dress as you walk down the halls of the domineering castle. Studying the flutter of your eyes when you take note of everything that surrounds you. Lonely eyes. He can’t quite get past them. Every day, he listens to the sound of your voice, memorising every hitched tone and every placating resonance.

He doesn’t get much of any internal thought regarding your own person. Anything he’s gathered so far has almost always regarded the safety and well-being of your people and nothing more. Always keeping to the business side of things.

Come to think of it, Obi-Wan has grown accustomed to the diplomat, rather than the woman he’s supposed to protect.

Realistically speaking, it was better that way. Easier. Less complicated.

“Who’s idea was it to ambush these things?” Rex laments.

“How was I supposed to know they travelled in swarms?” Anakin replies equally as annoyed.

The rain pours heavily and it leaves no mercy for the weak. Wind rushes against Obi-Wan’s cheeks as he considers this victory. He’s not sure why he’s going to relish the relief in your eyes when he returns, but the very idea of it warms him in this brittle rainstorm.

Cody stands up and draws his weapon. “Keep it still, General Skywalker. I need a clean shot–”

“No, don’t kill it!”

Obi-Wan didn’t think before stepping in front of the Commander��s line of fire. He does not think about his sense of urgency. He does not know why he wants, so badly, for this creature to be returned to you alive and unharmed.

It is easier to justify his actions with keeping the fate of the universe out of the reach of the Separatists and the Sith. It always is.

“Sir?” Cody inquires.

Obi-Wan is all too aware of the curious looks he’s getting from Rex and Anakin.

“We need a live specimen.” he briefly explains. “The Senator intends to use it to find out the most efficient way to eradicate them without poisoning the remaining food supply.”

The three men all look at him in understanding before Cody stands down and helps them restrain the pest.

He hopes that this would be enough to help you. Too many people have died in this war.

He prays that you’re not going to be one of them.

Obi-Wan could not be more relieved to step into the laboratory to find you hunched over your microscope. The doors seal shut behind him, startling you a bit and he feels awful for disturbing you. But he hopes that this will make up for it.

“One live specimen, as you requested.”

You’re genuinely surprised when he places the fidgeting creature on the counter.

The pest, an oversized locust, buzzes loudly as it tries to move. Its limbs were folded and tightly tied, pressed to its abdomen. The antennae swung wildly as it studies its captors, as you move closer to get a closer look with a fascinated gaze.

You cast him a curious look and you’re shocked at what you find.

His robes are soaked. Right down to the last thread. Nearly impeccably combed hair dishevelled, matted to his forehead before he pushes it back. His cloak is nowhere to be seen, he must’ve left it somewhere when he came to see you, bringing with him this… offering.

A prolonged silence stretches over the two of you.

“You…” your voice fails you, mind struggling to find the words. “You actually went out and found one…”

“Yes, is that not what you wanted?” He was a little out of breath, barely able to compose himself. “I was hoping to catch a few more just in case, but the storm made it exceedingly difficult to see anything.”

Blinking, you heave in a massive breath.

He doesn’t seem to realize the monolithic significance of his actions. The naive brightness in his eyes proves it.

You don’t think you can remember the last time anyone has ever done anything out of the kindness of their hearts since you became a Senator. Every day, each path you attempt to take is lined with the greed of a hundred. Or the hatred of a thousand. None have been forthcoming, and all have been ready to strike upon your presence.

Obi-Wan, as strict as he is on following orders, has always somehow edged on that path. Treated you with as much courtesy as the next person, but never truly allowed you to do much on your own. The objective of keeping you alive and safe always superseded anything else.

It frustrated you more, that he was kind yet restricted you from achieving your ultimate goal. It would’ve been much easier to loathe him had he been as unpleasant as everyone who claimed that they wanted to help.

A lot of things.

You looked down, swallowing thickly when your throat tightened. “I thought…”

That he did not truly want to help. That he did not understand. That his kind, the Jedi, were nothing but mindless servants parading around with sabers and robes and a glorified purpose. And while Obi-Wan had been all of that, he was also a little bit more.

You didn’t think he’d take you seriously.

“You thought what?” He was… worried. Afraid for some reason you’re not aware of.

But you cannot allow your mind to fall down that rabbit hole. Whatever reasons he might have to feeling the way he does are not what you are expecting. He just wants to make sure those trade routes don’t end up in the wrong hands. You’re merely a means to an end.

“Nothing.” You shake your head, giving him a placating smile. “Actually, no. I just wasn’t expecting you to go out of your way to find one of these things.”

“People are dying.” The statement is obvious. You’ve told him this dozens of times since his arrival, but it guts you nonetheless. “I’m just trying to do my part.” But his lukewarm smile soothes the gaping wound you’ve had to carry. “Now you do yours.”

Tears line your eyes. Your arms slowly close around him and hope he doesn’t shove you away for doing so. His robes are wet. His pulse thunders under the timid weight of your embrace and you wonder if it’s because of his rush to get here or if it was more because of you.

But you hope, in your transgression against his code, that your gratitude reaches across the abyss. You hope it melts through the years of ice and indifference. You want him to know how it feels to… feel.

“Thank you, Obi-Wan.” The gravity of your soft whisper melted into his robes. “Truly… you have no idea how much this means to me.”

He’s rendered speechless for the moment. As he stands stiffly in your embrace, unsure, you wonder if you had pushed too far.

But slowly, his arms enclose around your frame. His chest expands against your cheek, fingers pressing gently against the fabric of your white coat, over the flesh of your hips. Searing through whatever hesitance you previously had.

You smile through the tears, content. The comfort of his embrace soothes an ache so deep that it had grown numb. Through its timid grasp, it is enough for you. More than enough. More than he has ever given you.

But you must end it here. You reluctantly pull away, your cheek wet from his soaked cloth. It is impossible to reach his eyes, so you don’t.

You swallow thickly once more. “You should... probably change into something dry before you catch a cold.”

“Y—yes, that would be best.” he agrees and the stutter in his voice is the only things that tells you that he’s just as flustered as you are.

When he leaves, your hands cup your blazing cheeks while you try and fail to contain the glee blossoming in your heart.

You made sure that a droid brings him a warm cup of herbal tea minutes later.

After that encounter, Obi-Wan seems to want to be around your vicinity more often than he cared to admit.

“Any progress?” He crossed his arms as he looked over your shoulder while you were taking notes of your observations.

“Lots.” You did your best to ignore his proximity. The warmth of his stature radiating to you inside this cold laboratory was not an easy thing to dismiss.“The specimen you brought was definitely genetically modified.”

Obi-Wan expressed his genuine happiness; a bright grin that felt like could rival the light of a thousand stars. It left you dazed for minutes to pass.

But bringing that specimen, Obi-Wan realized, came at a cost. You spent more time than ever in that laboratory. You hardly left the place. Only coming out to eat and taking a quick shower and going right back in. So much time, that some of the servants became worried.

And they were right to.

“She practically lives there.” One of your maids, Aliyah, said to him. “Please speak to her, General. Hell, drag her out of there if you have to.”

Oh, he intends to. While he admires the dedication to your work, he thinks it to be detrimental more often than not.

Obi-Wan finds you hunched over the microscope. He immediately notes how wrinkled your lab coat is and how your hair looked like it wasn’t combed properly. It had lost its shine. Your aura was dampened, less vibrant. That, already, was concerning.

The low buzzing noise came from the specimen, which you had placed inside a small steel cage. It’s wings fluttered as it stared at you.

“I thought I told you I was not to be disturbed.” you drawled without taking the time to look up.

Again, he hates to have to take you away from your research, for it is imperative that you focus on it than anything else. But for the last three days, Obi-Wan had found himself looking forward to seeing you, to feeling your presence orbit around his.

“Did you eat today?”

You’re startled by him; nearly dropping your pen as you try to scribble down some notes. Your eyes, with bags under them, bleary and blinking rapidly to see him standing there.

“Obi-Wan…” He nearly flinches at the sound of his own name falling from your lips with dimmed glee. He feels too warm when you smile. “Hello again.”

He doesn’t know why his heart flutters when he takes note of how happy you are to see him. He doesn’t even want to acknowledge the feeling but it permeates through his good sense and stays at the forefront of his mind.

“Good evening.” He greets you back, though unsure of what to say next. A quiet moment passes and all he could think of was, “Your supper went cold.”

Your eyes widen considerably before you check your datapad. “Goodness, is it that time already?”

“I suppose that answers my question.” he muses softly as he comes closer.

Indeed, you have not eaten if you’re this surprised by the hour. Obi-Wan doesn’t like the idea that you are not taking care of yourself. You need to stay healthy if you’re to keep fighting this war. You need to stay healthy if you’re to stay alive.

Obi-Wan finds that he wants you to stay alive. More for… yourself, than anything.

“Come, you need sustenance.” he says as he gently takes your hand, pulling you off your seat. Your palm is cold. He squeezes just a bit to try and transfer his heat to into your skin.

He does not miss the jolt of your shoulders, or the quick glance of your joint hands. Had he gone too far? You don’t seem to be resisting his touch—

“I–I can’t leave yet, I still have more to do.” You gestured to the notes upon the counter.

Your laboratory had become messy in the last few days. There was equipment everywhere. Chemical spills, papers haphazardly laying around. It was difficult keeping the specimen in its cage and even harder to take samples from it without it trying to bite your fingers off.

Obi-Wan had surely noticed the mess and you feel rather embarrassed that he had to see it. He doesn’t seem to care, however, as he’s already clasped your hand in his and the other went to the small of your back, guiding you out of the lab. “It can wait.”

You glanced back at the specimen once and hoped the steel bars would hold. And you hoped the bars in your chest could hold in the thunderous heart that wanted to explode as you inhaled Obi-Wan’s calming scent.

“Thank you.” You place your fork back on the now empty plate and lean back on your chair. “I can’t remember the last time I took the time to actually enjoy a meal.”

Light rain drizzles from the sky tonight. The muffled noise of it all but fades into the background as Obi-Wan watches you.

Your radiance has somewhat returned. The exhaustion in your eyes was significantly diminished. You have worked yourself to the bone and beyond. He’s glad he stepped in to make sure you’re taken care of.

“Now all you need is a full night’s rest and off you go back into the lab.” The words are laced with a bit of disappointment.

His only wish is to see you flourish. If today was any indication, you may as well work until you drop to the ground before everything has settled and he does not want that.

“Although, I would recommend taking the time off to enjoy the sun for one day. It would be good for you.”

Your quiet hum responds back when you drink your wine. He’s not sure if it’s dismissive or if you agree with him. He hopes it is the latter. More for the fact that he would like to see more of you before going back to the Jedi Temple.

Dragging you out of the laboratory may seem drastic, but the idea does look more appealing when he considers how dreary the castle has been without your presence. He cannot, for the life if him, understand why seeing less of you dampens his mood.

From what he can understand, he knows your absence is rather unpleasant. Usually, he trails behind you, watching over you as you carry on with your day. Although some of the staff are wary of you, the ones who aren’t are positively delighted when they interact with you.

He knows he likes observing the way your fingers glaze over the petals of each flower in the garden after a long day of deliberating with difficult politicians. It takes a mountain of effort to tear his gaze away from you when you are most at peace.

The words tumble out of his mouth before he can stop them, “Would you like to spend the afternoon with me tomorrow?”

The blood in his ears roars wildly when your shocked gazes fixes on him.

What is he doing? What in the bloody hell is he doing?

He does not know why he said that. How could he have let that one slip? These thoughts were supposed to remain private. Locked away in the deepest ends of his mind. The thoughts are forbidden by the Jedi Code–

“The gardens are rather lonely without you.” he continues, hoping the nonchalance in his voice masks his jittery nerves.

Your eyes flutter as you stare back at him. He’s already cursing his existence for even opening his mouth.

But much to his relief, you smile softly as you take a sip from your glass of wine.

“Did they tell you that?” you jibe under the goblet in your hand and he smiles.

“They might have.”

Whether you are aware of what a Jedi should or shouldn’t do is a non-issue. You don’t pry into that aspect of his life. He can tell you have questions but choose not to ask. And he is grateful for that, because he doesn’t think he has any answers he could give. At least not any answers that can make sense to him.

You hum, glancing at the window. Your eyes watch the rain. “Well, I suppose paying them a visit wouldn’t hurt.”

The next day was well spent. And the day after. And the one after that.

You had both agreed to meet one a day in the gardens, or the library. Or anywhere within the castle, really. As long as it was away from the lab just to feel the sun in your hair or the wind on your face.

Obi-Wan can’t remember the last time he smiled this much. And you found yourself dreading every waking moment when you had to return to your research.

Every day, his thoughts turn to you before he can fully comprehend anything else.

His hand gently grasps yours as he helps you down the stairs. You try not to let the warmth of your cheeks bother you as you allow him to do so.

It becomes a common occurrence. Touching him, that is. Holding your hand as he helps you down the stairs because your dress is too long and your heels are precariously high. Keeping his hand at the small of your back as he guides you away from crowded areas, if he thinks there’s danger nearby. Sitting down with you for afternoon tea and telling you about his adventures with Anakin, the troublemaker.

He’s more… open. Luminous, almost. Like he deliberately brightens himself to make your bleak situation seem less dire. Because you find yourself more hopeful of the future, of how your people are going to survive this mess, of how they might treat you a little more fairly once this was all over.

His reasons for doing so are unclear, but you appreciate it all the same.

But you know that, eventually, it will have to come to an end.

He knew what you knew. That you could both prove what you had known and told the Senate all along. That your people’s food reserves were deliberately being sabotaged. All that was left now was to compile your findings and send it all to the relevant authorities.

The hard drive was given to Obi-Wan. Everything else was in the computer you were using. You opted to make more copies later. You had also instructed them to take the live specimen with them to Coruscant.

“You’re not coming with us?” The quiet devastation presses heavily against him.

“I have much more important matters to attend to here.” you tell him, clasping your hands together. “Senator Amidala will be waiting for you there. I trust that she’ll know what to do with all this information.”

He looks down. “So this is goodbye…”

Obi-Wan hadn’t expected to be parted from you so soon. Neither did you and quite frankly, you would have liked to have more time with him. Whatever this was, it was… nice.

“Until we see each other next time.” The lump in your throat is impossible to ignore.

Why does it feel like you’re severing a large portion of your life? His absence will be difficult to endure. But endure is all you must do.

You head bows slightly towards him. “Thank you for all you’ve done, Obi-Wan. You, General Skywalker and the Commanders have truly been a benefit to my people.”

You wonder if your eyes were deceiving you or that his eyes were glassy. He nods after a moment of silence, absorbing this information, this sudden change of pace. You feel it too. The sorrow. It twists sharply in your chest and weighs heavily on your shoulders.

Watching him step into his ship was hard. You swallowed down the lump in your throat and breathed out a heavy sigh. It didn’t feel like one of relief.

You couldn’t bring yourself to say that you were glad to be rid of him.

Obi-Wan had hoped to spend more time on your homeland before he returned to the Jedi temple. He discovered that he appreciated your presence, especially after that particular day, after you embraced him for the first time.

He just wasn’t expecting that. And he wasn’t expecting the flood of emotions that came with it either. How could he have denied you when you were so vulnerable with him? How could he have…

Maker, why did you have to make things so difficult? The worst part about it is that you don’t even seem to realize what you’re doing to him. You don’t know how his nerves seem to feel like a live wire when you’re near. You don’t understand how your smile softens years of hard training with Master Yoda and the late Master Qui Gon.

Every second he spends with you, he strays farther and farther away from the Jedi Code and so, yes, he should be happy that you’ve completed your task. He should be glad to be leaving. He should be glad to be putting as much distance between you and him as possible.

He should be glad to be rid of you.

Yet when you told him that you had already completed your study, he was rather… disappointed –devastated, even– upon having to go back the way he came.

“Hello? Is anyone there?” the voice of an unknown individual crackles over the communications systems of the ship, effectively snapping Obi-Wan out of his train of thought.

Commander Cody answers the young man and asks for his name and rank.

“This is Sergeant Daymar. There has been an incident at the castle—”

Obi-Wan’s eyes widen considerably. He catches Cody’s mirrored horror.

The Sergeant is panting. There are several voices in the background nearly overshadowing his own. There is chaos in the Force of your home planet. Obi-Wan can now feel it.

“What incident?” he cuts through the distorted explanation, desperate for answers, desperate to know.

“An explosion, sir.” the Sergeant rasps, his voice cracking at the end.“The Senator’s lab and the entire east wing has been blown to pieces.”

Obi-Wan thinks his heart dropped to the bottom of the ocean.

It didn’t take long to return. The ship had turned around as soon as possible to find its way back. Obi-Wan didn’t hesitate to run as soon as it landed. He had to know, he had to find you–

But amidst the chaos, you were nowhere to be seen. Searching through maids, through nurses, servants, guards, everyone and nothing. Five body bags have whirled past him and thankfully no one stopped to inform him that a Senator was in one of them. That was the only good sign he had.

“Where is she?” Obi-Wan brushes back his dishevelled hair, eyes desperately darting around the chaos in search of you. “Mara, where is she?”

The young guard, Mara, with blood dripping down the side of her face, looks at him at a loss for words. She couldn’t give him an answer. Her silence ices his veins faster than he can comprehend.

He’s off balance, losing his resolve with each moment you’re not in sight. He leaves you alone for five minutes. Five whole minutes and everything goes south.

Maker, why did he not insist on bringing you to Coruscant? He should’ve kept you close. He would’ve been able to protect you better that way. If anything happened to you–

“Obi-Wan!”

There’s a voice that yells from a distance and he thinks it might be yours. He doesn’t want hope to dangle in front of him, only to be taken away when he tries to reach for it.

Oh, but he still reaches for it. He reaches and reaches and there you are.

Alive. A little worse for wear but alive. There’s blood on your white coat and for a moment it terrifies him because he thinks it’s yours. Your face has a scratch and dust and there is fear in your eyes and he can feel you trembling from where he stands.

Obi-Wan is already heading over to you before he even realizes it. Thankfully, you meet him halfway, outstretching your hands towards him. He brings you into his arms, holding you tightly and relishing your equally constricting embrace.

He’s not sure if it’s your relief or his that floods into his veins as you sink into his body. He just knows that he feels a lot better knowing that you’re still breathing. The rapid beat of your heart ever so present under his palm when it settles against your back. It’s calming, nearly settling his fears into the rear ends of his mind.

He pulls away, hands grasping your forearms as he examines you. “How are you feeling? Where does it hurt?”

“I’m alright, General. Just a few cuts and bruises, nothing too serious.” You shake your head, giving a shaky smile. You glance back and he follows your gaze. “Uriah took the brunt of the explosion.”

Your guard had been settled into a mobile bed, where a team of your best doctors were doing their best to keep him alive. An oxygen mask over his face, hooked to an IV and a monitor as they cut into his armour and patched him up. He most likely suffered severe burns and will be out of commission for quite some time.

Obi-Wan glances at you and spots the frown on your face. Your guilt will forever taint his relief.

“Come.” He grasps your hands, gently pulling you with him. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”

The slow walk to your chambers was silent. Save for the few moments when Obi-Wan asked Mara to bring you a glass of water and a first aid kit to your chambers. To which you promptly refused the later because the were people who needed it more.

Your chambers were the least chaotic part of the castle. Mara brought a tray; a pitcher of water and two glasses with a small plate of sliced fruits in case all the excitement triggered your appetite.

Obi-Wan waited patiently outside for you to take a shower and get changed. He spoke to Commander Cody, who was already investigating the bomb site and securing the area with the other troops.

He found you sitting on the edge of your bed, picking at your fingers. Dejection settled on your features, eyes cast down in such a manner that was deeply concerning. He sits down next to you, taking your hand in his, a quiet prompt to tell him what was on your mind.

“I’m sorry.” comes your meek voice.

Obi-Wan tilts his head, gently prodding, “Whatever for?”

“I don’t know, I just…” You sounded so weak. The faintest cry he’s ever heard from you guts him deeply. “My lab.”

Years of blood, sweat and tears all gone in a single instant. You have dedicated your life to helping your people through scientific evidence and findings. You have poured your all into clearing your name, even though you never needed to. All of your hard work was eradicated.

His heart sank at the tears spilling from your eyes.

“All the proof I had on the pests that have been terrorizing our food supply. It’s all gone.” Your hand wipes a tear, only for another to fall.

“I still have the hard drive.” he tells you and for a moment you consider him with glassy eyes.

It won’t be enough. He knows it. You do too. But he won’t stop until all is right. For all that is good in the universe, Obi-Wan wanted to amend things. If only to make sure that he doesn’t get to see the look of despair on your face.

“We’ll find another specimen.”

“No–” You shake your head, standing up and he follows but he’s grasping your shoulders.

“We’ll collect more samples. We’ll do anything you need us to do.” His determined gaze cuts into your doubt and all your fears. His fingers tightening on your shoulders before gently gliding down your arms. “I’ll devote all my efforts to helping you rectify all of this, alright? Don’t give up. There’s still hope yet.”

Your quarrel falls into a hushed lull. It’s a sullen pause that makes him aware that you might be open to the idea.

Hope is the last thing you have to lose. After all you’ve been through, it is only right that you keep fighting. Otherwise all that you’ve lost will be for nothing. Obi-Wan doesn’t think he can stomach that. Your sacrifices being in vain. It’s not ideal.

“In the meantime, perhaps it is best if you come with us back to Coruscant.” he tells you, his hands rubbing your arms. The act served to soothe him more than you.

“What?” Your alarmed expression almost deters him. “N–no, but–”

“But nothing.” He interjects, shaking his head. “You were attacked in your own home. It’s not safe here.”

“I know that.” your defeated reply guts him. “But I can’t just leave my people to starve.”

No. Of course not.

Of course you would put your people first. How could he forget that? You are so selfless sometimes, that it serves as a crippling weakness. As much as e admires your loyalty to your people, he cannot say that it does not stand in the way of your safety.

And what’s worse? It is unlikely that the Jedi Council will step in to do something. Not unless there is a Sith involved in the discussion.

“And I can’t leave you to die here.” he tells you. “I would never forgive myself if I let that happen.”

“Why? Would the Jedi Council be displeased?” you scoffed. “Of course. Why wouldn’t they be? My life is nothing more than a bargaining chip for them and the Republic to hold over everyone else—”

“No.” he softly interjects, eyes casting down. “No, it has nothing to do with any of that…”

It’s hard to ignore the flutter in your chest. His insistence should annoy you, it should make you dig your heels in and tell him to get out of your face because your people are your priority, as they have always been. Yet, you it might be the first time in a while since anyone has ever cared more for your own life simply for the sake of cherishing it and not the political gain that comes with it.

Despite that, you don’t think you could bear the possibility of… of Obi-Wan being– feeling the same way you do.

Your gaze shifts away from him. “You have more important things to worry about.”

You’re startled by his hand grasping your cheek, forcing you to look at him as he responds, “They can wait.”

“Obi-Wan–”

“You were wrong.”

The protests melt into your throat. Blue eyes hold you captive in a silent trance. You’ve never been this close to him. You’ve never ached so much for being so close, yet so far.

“I know what it is like to care…” he begins, his gaze trailing to where his hand holds your cheek– “to love…” –to your lips for one long moment, until you were sure you could hear your own pulse beating in your ears, and back to your eyes. “I know what it’s like to devote your entire being to something you know you cannot live without.”

He leans in close, closer. The warms of his breath has your ears ringing in alarm and your heart thundering in your chest.

“You are a Jedi.”

He visibly bristles. The word felt like a stab to the gut.

“Yes… that, I am.” he softly agrees, though he makes no move to pull away from you.

“It is unbecoming of an outstanding Jedi such as yourself.” you quietly point out.

“Yes, it is.” he concurs nonetheless, nodding.

Your silence tells him a lot of things. Your eyes tell him more. Rejection is not one of them. There is a mountain of uncertainty, an astounding hesitance. But he finds not a hint of denial as his nose brushes against yours.

It is forbidden. What he asks. What he wants. What you both want, it is forbidden.

You cannot, out of respect for him, allow it. You shouldn’t even entertain the thought. For both your sakes, you should pull away and ask him to leave. If only to put some distance between the two of you. If only so you could both think straight.

Your lips part to whisper, to try and reason, “We really shouldn’t–”

And he wholeheartedly concurs. “No, we really shouldn’t.”

Yet he kisses you anyway, regardless of your mutual agreement. The hitch in your throat marks your downfall, as well as his.

It’s a timid press to your lips. Void of any of the confidence you’re so used to from the infamous Jedi Knight. It is nothing like what you expected of him. He kisses you like he’s discovering a part of himself that was never allowed to be.

You can’t pull away. You don’t want to.

The truth of your beating hearts ascends and hangs in the quiet air, where it is only dampened by the sound of falling rain and illuminated by the flash of lightning. Through the raging storm outside and the quiet one within, Obi-Wan’s embrace is the softest you’ve ever been held.

He’s surprised by the teasing swipe of your tongue, a startled noise escaping him, which makes you smile. You thread your fingers through his hair, pulling him tightly against your frame. He sighs into your mouth, arms slowly wrapping around you.

He allows you to take the lead, showing him the very thing he was denied, lighting a path that was closed away in the dark. He lets you illuminate it, feels how it shines through him, and through you with nothing but a warmth that invited him to step further.

It is nothing like what he expected. Yet it is everything he has ever wanted and more.

It is only when you pull away that he is distressed, but you gently remind him, “You know this isn’t allowed, right?”

His hand grips the back of your neck, pulling you back to him. His lips find yours again, unwilling to part from you for another moment. He takes the lead, taking his time to kiss you in earnest as he has always wanted for the last few months of his life. He murmurs words into your mouth, words he can’t quite understand himself.

“I know–” kiss. “I know that.” kiss. “I’m sorry.” You’re giggling uncontrollably as the apologies spill from his swollen lips. “I’m sorry, I can’t stop–”

“It’s okay…” The way your brows furrow tells him that your heart says otherwise. Your hand gently caresses his cheek as you look over the corner of his mouth, where your thumb traces. “The Jedi Council won’t approve of this.”

An affronted expression falls over him. “The Jedi Council doesn’t need to know.”

“My, my…” Your head rolls back as you’re giggling. “What has become of you?”

He groans into your neck, arms tightening around you, unwilling to let you go. Neither do you, quite frankly. You’ve wanted to have this for so long, to have him. His embrace was otherworldly, it was unfair that you’ve gone this long without it. Reaching your hands behind his back, you could feel the way his heart raced.

You don’t know how this was going to work. Obi-Wan is a Jedi. A man who has dedicated his entire life to nothing but the good of the universe. This– what he wants, what you both want, is forbidden.

“Let me wallow in my treason in peace.” he speaks mournfully, pressing his lips against the side of your neck. “Let me have this moment of peace.”

That, you think, you can grant him.

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mcbenson25 · 3 months

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Unspoken Bonds (Olivia Benson X Friend! Reader, Rafael Barba X Reader)

Request: Hello, there! I would like to request an Olivia Benson x Friend!Reader were reader and some friends in the alley near Olivia's apartment building. One day, after a fight with her boyfriend, reader is drinking beer in the spot she usually hangs out at, and Olivia talks her into going back into the apartment. They talk, and Olivia cooks her dinner. Olivia asks reader to join her some other time.

A/N: This request has been tweaked with the boyfriend but not boyfriend just someone the reader has been crushing on being Barba and the fight being him leaving the squad after his trial! I hope you like it so sorry it took so long!

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The air in the alley was usually welcoming. The hushed whispers, the laughter.

Today it seemed quiet. Tense.

You walked, a frown on you face as you rushed into the bar. You were not by any means a drinker, but you always came with the squad to drink after a case.

You sighed. There was no one here today and you needed a drink.

Or two or three.

Earlier in the day, a heated argument had erupted between you and Rafael. He was found not guilty and yet instead of celebrating you found yourself even more upset.

He wanted to leave. Leave the DA's office. Leave the squad.

Leave you.

It angered you how you had supported him from the moment he pulled the plug and it had all been for nothing. The weight of the disagreement lingered heavily in the air as you found yourself drowning another drink.

You loved him.

Not that he knew, of course. To him, you were just a friend. Just a really good friend he would call every morning, text every night, laugh with, go on vacations with.

Just a friend.

The whole squad knew you had feeling for him beyond a silly crush. You hadn't wanted to tell him. You were certain he didn't have the same feelings for you. If he did he would have already made a move by now. It had been years since you had met. So many coffee meet-up, trial victory dinners and late night movies.

You scowled as you asked the bartender for another one, not noticing someone eyeing you from across the bar.

Olivia, ever perceptive, noticed the turmoil in your eyes when you walked into the bar. She decided to give you some space but kept a watchful eye. As the night wore on and the three drink became six it became apparent that you weren't going to bounce back from this one easily. Olivia knew how much you cared for Barba. She knew the how upset you were. From the moment you had come back from the courthouse and left with you jacket without saying a word, Olivia knew something was wrong. A call from Rafael confirmed her suspicions. Lots of things were said, lots of unpleasant ones and Olivia listened as he pleaded her to check up on you.

Which led to her quietly approaching you.

"Mind if I join you?" she asked, her tone a careful mix of concern and warmth.

You looked up, offering a small, sad smile. "Hey, Liv. Yeah, sure."

The two of you settled into a quiet corner, away from the prying eyes and the buzzing conversations. Olivia, familiar with the unsaid language of pain, waited for you to open up.

"He wants to leave, Liv," you finally spoke, your voice barely above a whisper. "After everything that happened with the trial, he just wants to start fresh. I can't wrap my head around it, Liv. We fought, and I don't know what to do."

Olivia's eyes softened, understanding the weight of your words. "He's worried about you, you know?"

You rolled your eyes. "Of course he is," you said, sarcasm lacing your voice.

"Why haven't you told him?"

Your eyes went wide as you looked up. "Liv I can't."

"Why not?" Came the careful pry.

You felt something wet on your cheek and you touched it, realizing you were crying.

You were immediately engulfed by a caring warmth. Olivia held you, as the tears continued to flow freely down your face.

"Let's get out of here," she whispered into your ear as she called over the bartender to pay your tab

You nodded as you pulled away, as you tried to wipe your tears away. "No Liv let me pay-"

"No, I think you've gone through enough today." As she glanced down at the receipt she looked over at you and couldn't help but laugh as she passed you the bill.

You looked at it.

Holy shit. 200 bucks.

"Still want to pay?" She asked with a grin and you cracked, giggling as you shook your head.

Olivia finished paying and you tried to get up but immediately felt the weight of the drink your had.

This is why I don't get drunk.

Olivia helped you towards her car, laughing the whole way as you tried to walk in a straight line.

After a five minute struggle you managed to get into her car.

"Is it okay if we go to my place?" Olivia asked.

Feeling a sense of comfort in her offer, you agreed, allowing Olivia to guide you back to her apartment.

Inside, the apartment felt like a sanctuary. She made sure you were comfortable, offering a safe space for you to unload the burden you had been carrying.

"So why haven't you told him?"

You sighed and let out a deep breath. "I don't know Liv. He probably doesn't even feel the same way. We've been friends for years and he's never show any interest beyond our friendship."

Olivia nodded, the conversation beginning to sound awfully familiar. "You won't know unless you tell him. Would you really just let him leave without telling him?"

"I-I-I don't know. Maybe?" You tried, stuttering.

Olivia raised her eyebrows. "Seriously?"

You threw your hands up in defeat. "Liv come oooon! That's not fair."

Olivia shook her head, "It's not fair to either of you."

You were quiet.

After a while, sensing the need for a change of tone, Olivia suggested, "How about I cook us some dinner? A little distraction might do us good."

You managed a weak smile, appreciating the effort to get your mind off it.

-----------

As Olivia moved around the kitchen, getting everything on the stove, she felt her phone vibrate.

A text message.

'Is she okay?'- Rafa

Olivia wiped you hand on a towel as she peaked her head and saw you had picked a book off herself and had begun to read it. She sighed before texting Rafael back.

'Yes but you need to tell her!'

A minute passed before a reply came.

'I will.'- Rafa

She smiled as she looked up at you form on the couch, engrossed in the book, before getting back to dinner.

-------

As the smell of food filled your nose you began to lose interest in the book you had grabbed from Liv's bookshelf. You stood up and placed it back in its spot before walking to the window, looking out at the city below.

You sighed, rubbing your eyes. You knew you had acted childishly. You knew going to the bar wouldn't and hadn't solved any of your problems.

You knew you had to tell him.

You checked your phone, having putting it on silence after storming out of Rafael's office.

70 new text messages and 20 missed calls.

A new text appeared before you could open the others.

'I'm sorry for today. I hurt you and I need to see you. Let me make this right. Please let me see you.'- Raf <3

Your heart skipped a beat but before you could text back Olivia called out, "Dinner's ready."

As you sat down to eat, the taste of Olivia's homemade dinner mingled with the shared silence made you anxious. She glanced up as your leg bounced erratically under the table.

"Are you ok-"

"He asked to see me!" You blurted out.

Olivia tried to hide her smile as she nodded. "And?"

"I'm going to tell him." You said with determination.

Olivia took a drink from her wine. "That's great. I'm glad."

You smiled as you texted Rafael back as Olivia took another bite from her food, trying to keep her composure as she felt her phone go off.

'Thank you Liv. I owe you a million.'- Rafa

Olivia looked up grinning and you grinned back.

"See my food makes everything better!" She joked.

You laughed. "Thank you Liv. Honestly you're such a good friend."

"It's what I do," She said with a smile as she began to think how she would tell the squad tomorrow.

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Taglist: @wittysunflower, @rocknroll900

Sorry this request took forever. The writing slump was quite real. I hope you all liked it and please leave comments and thoughts as well as requests!! Love you all!

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mcbenson25 · 3 months

Text

I Have Something For You (Eobard Thawne X Reader)

A/N: Helloooooo. Here's a little one-shot that didn't make it into More Than He Bargained For that I thought you would all enjoy!

---------------------------------

"I have to go out of town for a couple of days," Eobard reluctantly informed you, his expression softening as he looked down at your pouting face. "What? Why?" you protested, your eyes searching his for an explanation.

Eobard couldn't resist the charm of your pout; it made him feel guilty about leaving you. A warm smile graced his lips as he reassured you, "I have to do this thing for work, but I'll be back before you know it."

"Impossible," you countered, pressing a quick, affectionate kiss on his lips before snuggling closer to him. "I always hate when you aren't here."

He sighed, his gaze fixed on you. He wished he could freeze this moment, capture it in eternity. You and him…happy, lovers. You made the stagnant existence in this time period bearable. "Why can't you take me with you?" you asked, breaking him out of his thoughts.

"You know I can't," he replied, his voice filled with a touch of regret.

You groaned in response, not happy but acceptingly. "Alright."

A comfortable silence enveloped the room as the television droned on in the background, providing background noise with its latest stock market analysis.

"I have something for you," Eobard suddenly broke the silence, his voice infused with anticipation.

Your eyes lit up, and you sat up eagerly, a smile tugging at your lips. "Oh? What is it?"

"We have to go outside, though," he teased, pressing a tender kiss on your lips. "Meet me outside," he said, his voice carrying a hint of excitement.

You giggled as you watched him almost trip on his way to your shared bedroom, his playful smile and wink leaving you with a sense of curiosity. Grabbing your shoes, you headed outside to join him.

Eobard's house was a cozy haven, nestled alongside the lake bordering Central City. The backyard was a sight to behold, with towering, lush trees adorned with delicate jar lights. A beautiful garden with a meandering stone path guided you towards the shimmering lake. From this vantage point, you could also see the dazzling cityscape, adding to the enchantment of your little piece of heaven.

"It's beautiful."

You turned around and found Eobard standing beside you, a gentle smile playing on his lips. Your heart fluttered at the sight of him. "It is," you replied, unable to contain your joy.

"Oh, I wasn't talking about the view," he sweetly retorted, his gaze filled with affection.

You couldn't help but grin, feeling the warmth spread across your cheeks.

"Before I go, I wanted to give you something, but first, I have to ask you something," Eobard began, his voice laced with nerves.

Curiosity ignited within you. "Okay," you responded, your voice soft and filled with anticipation.

He took a deep breath, his hand trembling slightly as it ran through his hair. "Is everything okay?" you asked, concern creeping into your voice.

"Yes! Yes, I just—" he stammered, his eyes meeting yours before he finally gathered his composure. Stepping forward, his voice regained strength. "Will you marry me?"

You stood frozen, unable to process the question at first.

Did he just...?

Oh my goodness..

He just asked me to marry him

"Yes, of course!" you squealed with delight as he kissed you passionately, sealing the moment. As you pulled apart, your eyes glanced down and spotted a dazzling diamond ring with your beloved gemstone nestled in the center.

Overwhelmed with joy, you looked up at him and said, "I love you."

A radiant smile graced his face as he replied, "I love you too."

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Taglist: @khayrrilrainxwells @kirareaper13 @i-dont-care-lol @cursedfaechild @lovepeaceorelse @roryjames82 @brianllamawrites @achromaticerebus @honeybeezgobzzzzz @bellagomez-barriga @readingfanficdonotdisturb @tahiraseoti @roguerieka22

Hope you enjoyed this little snippet! Please feel free to leave any comments or thoughts as well as ideas! Love you all!

#harrison wells #harry wells #harry wells x reader #harrison wells x reader #eobard x reader #eobard thawne x reader #eowells #eobard thawne #earth x #earth 2 #the flash cw #reverse flash x reader #reverse flash #fanfic #fanfiction #love triangle #xreader #x reader

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mcbenson25 · 3 months

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mcbenson25 · 4 months

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I keep seeing people making fun of using growled, hissed, roared, snarled etc in writing and it’s like.

have you never heard someone speak with the gravel in their voice when they get angry? Because that’s what a growl is.

Have you never heard someone sharply whisper something through the thin space of their teeth? Or when your mother sharply told you to stop it in public as a kid when you were acting up/being too loud? Because that’s what a hiss is.

Have you never heard a man get so blackout angry that their voice BOOMS through the house? Because that’s what a roar is.

Have you never seen someone bare their teeth while talking to accentuate their frustration or anger while speaking with a vicious tone? Because that’s what snarling is.

It’s not meant to be a literal animal noise. For the love of god, not every description is literal. I get some people are genuinely confused, but also some of these people are genuinely unimaginative as fuck.

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mcbenson25 · 4 months

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More Then He Bargained For Final Part

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8

A/N: Hello everyone! It's been...awhile. Rest assured I have not completely forgotten about our little story here and here it is, the final part. I won't spoil the ending but even if the ending isn't what you wanted, don't worry they'll be something in the near future for you :). I missed you all and thank you for reading. It means the world to me :)

Warnings: Violence, blood mentions, injury, mild language

-----------

The blaring alarm reverberated through the air, its shrill sound threatening to deafen you. You decided to not join Iris and Felicity, realizing that splitting up was the better option to avoid detection. Carefully, you climbed back up, positioning yourself just out of sight from the approaching soldiers while keeping a watchful eye on their movements. Pulling out your phone, you opened the Star Labs layout, that Cisco had given everyone a while back, containing the intricate layout of building and the hidden passages.

Following the map, you located a passage leading to the Time Vault where you knew you could get access to the entire building's security feeds.

As you made your way, gunshots echoed in the vicinity, accompanied by the frantic voices of Felicity and Iris below. You ran, taking advantage of the distraction that masked your movements. You located the vent and crawled through the space before you spotted the opening to the Time Vault and descended into the pristine white room, where the small white podium sat.

"Good evening, Mrs. Thawne," Gideon greeted you. You winced inwardly at the mention of your name, but there were pressing matters at hand. "Good evening, Gideon," you responded, your focus sharpening. "Can you pull up the security feed for the lab?"

"Certainly," Gideon replied, swiftly bringing up the footage. You scrolled through the screens until one caught your attention, its eerie red light casting an ominous glow. There, in the center of the room, was Kara, restrained and… in a hospital gown?

Your heart sank as you witnessed a tall figure loom over Kara, a needle poised menacingly in their hand. The needle plunged into her arm, eliciting a wince from Kara as a voice dripped with malicious intent, uttering the chilling words, "She's cooked."

An unmistakable shiver ran down your spine.

It was Eobard's voice.

Overgirl lay nearby, engrossed in an exchange of comforting words with Dark Arrow, while Eobard reached for a small machine resembling a surgical device. With a gasp, you closed the footage, knowing you needed a plan to put a stop to what was happening.

Bounding back up into the vent, you searched for the path leading to the room where Kara was held captive. Moving with measured steps, you walked slowly, mindful of any noise that could betray your location. Suddenly, the lights flickered, and darkness enveloped the area, only to be replaced by the emergency lights illuminating the vents. The power had been cut off.

A smile tugged at your lips.

Iris and Felicity.

As you neared the room, the sounds of a fight against the soldiers echoed through the corridor as they swiftly unstrapped Kara, who appeared frail and weakened. "Get me to the Sun," she whispered, her voice laced with urgency. Felicity and Iris grasped Kara's weakened form, determinedly making their way toward the elevator.

Meanwhile, you saw several Nazi soldiers running towards the room. You knew you had to give them time to escape, so you opened the vent and dropped in front of them. The sudden noise caught their attention, and for an instant, you all stood there, locked in an unexpected standoff.

"Well, this is awkward, isn't it?" you quipped, rolling up your sleeves, your gaze fixed on the soldiers.

Without hesitation, you delivered a punch to one of the Nazis, swiftly disarming them and employing their weapon against the others. The adrenaline surged through your veins as you exchanged blows, evading their strikes. One of them managed to land a solid hit to your face, you winced momentarily before retaliating with a swift kick to their legs.

Pushing through the laying plot of soldiers, you ran toward Felicity, Iris, and Kara, their desperate hopes resting on the elevator doors.

"Where have you been?" Felicity exclaimed, her voice tinged with relief and urgency, while Iris frantically pressed the elevator button.

"Busy!" you retorted, a hint of defiance in your response, just as the sound of approaching footsteps grew louder, signaling the imminent arrival of reinforcements.

Thankfully, the elevator doors began to open, but to your surprise, a green beam of energy erupted, striking Kara and propelling her across the room. A colossal, menacing robot emerged, its presence overshadowing any hope of escape.

"I don't believe Mr. Thawne is done with you yet," the robot boomed. Soldiers began flooding into the room, and the four of you reluctantly raised your hands in surrender.

The soldiers seized you forcefully, their grips tight as they dragged you into the cortex where Dark Arrow and another group of soldiers were. Your eyes darted around the room, instinctively searching for Eobard. He walked in, engrossed in his tablet, attempting to restore the power for the surgery. He cast a glare directed at Iris and Felicity which morphed into a lingering gaze as he saw your bruised cheek. You noticed his hand twitch, an urge to examine the injury clearly itching within him. When his eyes met yours, you looked away, unwilling to invite his attention.

"Report," Dark Arrow's deep voice snapped Eobard's focus back to the tablet.

"Good news," Eobard said, struggling to avert his gaze from you, "The Wellenreiter has successfully transitioned to this Earth."

Dark Arrow took a menacing step forward. "Kara is all that matters."

Eobard resisted the urge to roll his eyes, knowing this would hinder their plans. "That red sunlight we're subjecting her to? It's fading away. So, pretty soon," Eobard's annoyance seeped into his words, "her cells will be so desaturated that the surgery will be impossible."

"Fix it," Dark Arrow commanded with a dark edge to his voice.

"I can't," Eobard replied, exasperation lacing his words.

"This is your city. This is your facility. So turn the power back on," Dark Arrow's patience waned.

"I can't because the system is encrypted," Eobard retorted. He wanted to hit this man so badly and his restraint to do so was waning.

You exchanged a quick glance with Felicity, acknowledging her brilliance in the encryption.

"By who?" Dark Arrow questioned.

"By Ms. Smoak," Eobard answered, shifting Dark Arrow's attention toward Felicity with a deadly glare.

"Felicity Smoak, turn the power back on," Dark Arrow growled, his gaze fixated on her.

Eobard spoke, advancing toward Felicity, his speed allowing him to seize her and pin her against the wall by her throat. "He said," Eobard's voice dripped with threat, "turn the power back on!"

Despite being held by her throat, Felicity managed to utter, "Sorry, Eobard. Eobard?" mispronouncing his name.

"Eobard," he emphasized, increasing the pressure on her neck.

"My God, the future sounds weird," she gasped between breaths, the strain evident in her voice.

Eobard scoffed. "That's funny. Sometimes we think we're more clever than we actually are. Because where I come from, the history books are filled with tales of the age of heroes, yet none of them mention Felicity Smoak." His eyes turned red, and he vibrated his hand menacingly toward her.

"No! Felicity!" you screamed, kicking the guard holding you, causing him to lose his grip. Swiftly, you sprinted toward her, but before you could reach her, something struck your head, sending you sprawling to the floor.

Dark Arrow loomed above you, weapon in hand, poised to strike you once more. Clutching your throbbing head, you noticed blood staining your trembling hand. Eobard halted in his tracks, his eyes widening as he observed you sprawled on the ground, blood trickling down your face. His gaze burned with fury. This was the final blow to his patience. He turned, ready take Dark Arrow's heart and squeeze the life out of it, but a voice resonated through the room.

"No! Stop. Stop," Kara stumbled into the cortex, her voice filled with desperation. "You came here for me, so just take me. Please, don't hurt anyone else."

Felicity shook her head vehemently. "No, Kara."

"It's okay, Felicity. Give them the code," Kara reassured her, her voice tinged with resignation. Felicity lowered her head in defeat, reluctantly providing the code to Eobard, who struggled to maintain composure as he watched the guard haul you up, your balance faltering as you attempted to stand. Your eyes met his, you shook your head.

He had chosen his side.

And it wasn't you.

The power came back on as the guards dragged you away. You could still feel the blow to your head, and you winced as the soldiers pushed you to follow Iris and Felicity in front of the glass to where Kara was lying once again on the surgical table next to a sleeping Overgirl.

"Oh my God," Iris whispered.

"Kara," you said, reaching out to the glass before the soldier snapped at you, swatting your hand away. You glared at the soldier before turning your attention back to the scene unfolding in front of you. Eobard had grabbed one of the larger scalpels, admiring it, before looking up, meeting your eyes. The look of malice in his eyes dimmed as you watched him sigh, and you looked away, your eyes watering, focusing on Kara.

There was no use pleading with him anymore. There was nothing left to save.

Eobard turned back to Kara. "This next sound, metal through bone," he said as he moved the scalpel closer toward Kara's chest, "that's my favorite part," he finished with an evil smile.

"You might want to close your eyes," he said as he dipped the scalpel down to her chest.

You held your breath, waiting for the piercing scream to come but there was none.

Iris and Felicity exchanged confused looks with you as you heard Dark Arrow's voice laced with annoyance. "What are you waiting for? DO. IT."

Eobard looked up, his body still filled with rage from earlier. "I'm trying. There's something that-"

Eobard was cut off with Ray shouting, "Mitts off Mengle!" and you watched him transform from a miniature person back to his normal size. He punched Eobard in the face, stunning him before blasting him out of the room. You took the opportunity to kick the soldier behind you as Iris grabbed one of the paperweights and slammed it into the other soldier's head, knocking him out.

You rushed to Kara, who was being unlatched from the bed by Ray.

"Oh hey!" Ray greeted cheerfully, "I got your S.O.S. How was the wedding?"

Felicity giggled as you and Iris exchanged looks of disbelief, and Kara, who had sat up, laid back down again in disbelief. He helped Kara up as you walked into the corridor. "The rest of the Legends are here and we're busting everybody out."

"Wait!" Felicity exclaimed. "We need someone to lock the time vault."

"I'll do it." You said with a nod. "Don't have too much fun without me."

--------------

"Do you think anyone is coming for us?"

Harry rolled his eyes. It was the millionth time Cisco had asked since he had woken up. "Cisco, if you ask one more time, I will personally make sure you stay in here forever."

There was a pause, and Harry smiled before Cisco said, "Man, someone's having a bad day."

Right as Harry was about to quip back, there was a booming voice over the intercom, "Attention all prisoners: Great news. The cavalry has arrived."

Nate's voice was a relief as everyone cheered.

Harry sighed in relief as his cell moved towards the door and opened.

"About time. I was about to murder Cisco." He joked. "Do me a favor and free him last."

Nate laughed and agreed.

As Harry walked out into the hall, he immediately started to look for you. He ran down the cortex hallway and noticed the door to the time vault close. He crept slowly as he opened it, grabbing a nearby metal piece as he went in and saw something move and swung.

"What the hell!?" He heard a familiar voice yell.

"Y/N?" He said confused and relieved, and he dropped the pole.

"Harry!" You exclaimed, and he walked up to you and hugged you.

You were surprised by the gesture but felt relieved he was alive. You pulled back slightly, your face close to his.

"Where are the others?"

Harry seemed lost in thought, still holding onto your waist.

"Harry?" You asked softly, your heart suddenly running a marathon as you felt it pound against your chest.

His gaze locked with yours as he bridged the space between you, his eyes conveying a mix of warmth and longing. The air around you seemed to shift as his lips, soft and inviting, tenderly converged with yours. The moment was seamless, like a natural progression of shared glances and unspoken sentiments.

You wrapped your arms around his neck, drawn into the kiss by an invisible force that had been building between you for longer than you both realized. The touch of his lips was a revelation, a delicate dance of vulnerability and passion. His hands found a comfortable place on your waist, pulling you a fraction closer.

As you both pulled away, he looked at you with a warmth that made you feel butterflies. "I was worried," he admitted, his voice tinged with genuine concern.

"I'm not as soft as I seem," you replied, a smile playing on your lips.

Harry chuckled softly, a mix of relief and amusement. "I should have known better." He pressed his forehead against yours. "Let's find the others and get out of here."

----------------

Eobard was about to lose his mind. The very scenario he had repeatedly warned Dark Arrow about had unfolded right before his eyes.

Each time he looked at the man, fury surged within him, fueled by the haunting image of your bloodied head replaying incessantly in his mind. Attempting to muster the remnants of his patience, annoyance dripped from his words, thinly veiling his exasperation. "The general isn't safe here anymore."

A glare shot his way from Dark Arrow, who stepped forward with a huff. "I'm well aware of that."

The temptation to kill him gnawed at Eobard. "Fall back to the troop carrier and get ready for the invasion," Dark Arrow ordered.

Finally, things were aligning with Eobard's plans.

Not that he cared, but he asked anyways, "Without you?"

"I'm staying," came the seething reply. "Supergirl won't leave here alive."

"Don't make it personal," Eobard cautioned. "Bad move."

Dark Arrow slammed his hand on the desk beside Eobard. Before he could retort, another voice cut in, "Are you questioning your Fuhrer's orders?"

Suppressing the urge to roll his eyes in irritation, Eobard met Overgirl's gaze, her eyes fixed on him for a response.

"Of course not," he retorted, his tone soft yet laced with harshness. "General."

With that, he sped off to ready himself for the awaited attack, but there was one matter he needed to take care of.

-------------

Back on the Waverider, a whole new set of issues slammed into you like a freight train. Professor Stein got hit hard during the fight, his life tethered to Jax, and Caitlyn and Ray were on a wild mission to find a solution.

Iris had dashed off to find Barry, while Felicity and Oliver were deep in the mystery of what was happening with Overgirl. That left you with Harry. The post-kiss buzz had worn off, and now you were feeling a bit awkward. Not that the kiss wasn't something you wanted, but it was definitely uncharted territory.

"So, um, are we, like," you stuttered, a blush creeping up your cheeks, "together now?"

Harry's ears matched your blush as he ran a hand through his hair. "Well, I mean—if you want?"

"I just… I don't know," you began, seeing Harry's confusion.

"Harry, I want to be with you," you clarified, and he broke into a smile, "but maybe we shouldn't rush anything."

Harry nodded, a genuine agreement in his eyes. "Right. After all, we have all the time in the multiverse."

Your grin widened at his charmingly dorky comment.

"We should head back," he suggested, taking a step closer, his hands gently encircling your waist. He placed a tender kiss on your forehead.

"I'll catch up with you. I'm just going to grab a change of clothes and freshen up a bit," you said with a smile as he left.

In the bathroom, you gave your face a wake-up call with a splash of cold water. Looking in the mirror, you noticed some dried blood in your hair from the Dark Arrow's blow earlier. Letting out a sigh, you figured a quick shower was in order.

The water was refreshing, but as it ran down, you winced a bit, trying to rinse the blood from your hair. It hit you then – tiredness. With each droplet, you could feel the weariness in your muscles, and you realized you couldn't recall the last time you had a decent sleep.

You dried off and instinctively reached for your neck before sighing.

There was nothing there anymore.

As you got dressed, thoughts of Harry lingered. He had kissed you, and you were, well, let's just say you weren't upset. In fact, it was the first time in a very, very long time that you felt this kind of happy warmth.

"That's a nasty cut you've got there."

You turned around, and there, of course, stood the last person in the world you wanted to see.

"What do you want, Eobard?" you huffed out harshly, already trying to get around him to leave.

He sighed. "I was worried."

You stared up at him before bursting out laughing hysterically. "You know, Eobard, that's about the craziest thing I've heard today," you managed to say while still laughing.

He took a step towards you, and you immediately stepped back.

"No."

He looked at you. "No?"

And that's when you just lost it.

"No. You don't get to come here and act all worried about me when you were about to split my BEST FRIEND OPEN AND HAD ZERO REMORSE ABOUT IT. YOU DON'T GET TO WALTZ IN AND START MAKING DECISIONS, AND YOU SURE AS HELL DON'T HAVE ANY RIGHT TO SPEAK TO ME.," you screamed at him, pushing him with each word until you realized you were crying.

Silence hung heavily between you, broken only by the sound of your ragged breaths.

Eobard took a sharp inhale before quietly saying, "You're right. I don't have any right. I lied to you, so many times."

"I never meant to hurt you. You could say it was selfish, stringing you along, but I love you," he paused and glanced up at you, "and even if you never want to see me again, I need you to know that. Every touch, every kiss, everything was real."

There was a moment of silence as you let his words sink in.

You sighed, rubbing your eyes, trying to wipe the tears and exhaustion from them. "Maybe it was. Maybe it wasn't," You took a shaky breath in still trying to regain your composure, "But you chose your side."

"Wait-" Eobard tried.

You shook your head. "It wasn't me that you chose, and I'm done chasing someone who will never choose me."

Silence clung in the air as Eobard glanced up at you before cautiously stepping towards you and you let him. "Even if you never forgive me," his hand lightly reaching for your face, "I'll always be here for you. Whatever you need, whenever. It's the least I can do."

As you looked up you knew he meant every single syllable of that statement. You placed your hand on his and leaned against it.

"Thank you."

"Do you love him?" He asked after a moment.

There was another pause.

"I think so."

Just as the words settled between you two, an urgent voice echoed through the Waverider, "Guys, something happened in the med bay!"

Eobard kissed your forehead. "Go."

You pulled away, and just as he was about to leave, he turned around.

"Be happy, my darling." He gave you a soft smile before he rushed away, leaving you staring at the spot he had just been.

"I hope you can be too."

---------------------------

Professor Stein was dead.

As you stood in the control room, you reached for Harry as the rest of the team filled the room, taking a moment to mourn the loss of not just a friend but a part of their family.

"We have got to stop Overgirl."

You all turn to face Oliver.

"Professor Stein's death will not be for nothing. Failure is not an option. We are going to win. We are going to show these people that this Earth belongs to us."

"Great speech," came Frost's blunt response and you couldn't help but giggle.

Gideon's voice filled the ship. "Mr. Queen we are being hailed by another Time Ship."

"Put it on."

"I want to offer a truce." Dark Arrows figure appeared not eh hologram. "We will peacefully return to our Earth."

"In exchange for what," Barry asked.

"Supergirl comes with us."

You all looked at each other in agreement before Oliver took a step toward the hologram.

"Here another difference between you and me," he took a sharp breath in, "I don't abandon my friends!"

With the the hologram was shut off.

Sara stepped up. "Alright everybody ready to go."

Harry squeezed you hand as everyone nodded.

Sara nodded. "For the professor."

--------------

"Okay is it me or is this entire thing not working?" You asked after barely dodging another hit from the other Waverider

Harry shook his head frustrated. "It's not working."

"You need to take down their shields," Felicity said, looking at the screens.

Harry and Cisco glared at her, they knew this already. Before Harry could snap back at her you hit both of their arms.

"Ow!" Harry exclaimed as Cisco rubbed his arm.

"Quit whining and let's hit this damn ship," You said sternly.

After a couple tries Felicity spoke again with worry laced on her words. "Guys this still isn't working. I think we need a bigger gun."

"Way ahead of you."

You watched Kara fly toward the other ship. In a flash you saw Overgirl burst out of her ship crashing into Kara.

"Waiting for some good news here," Cisco said nervously.

"I don't have any for you man!" Felicity exclaimed. "The only way to take out their shield is to get someone on board that ship."

"I can get up there but I'll need someone to do all the computer work," Frost's said over the coms.

"I'll go," Felicity said.

You shook your head. "No you stay here and I'll go. You know the ship better than anyone so we need you here."

"Absolutely not." Harry immediately said. "You're not going anywhere."

Felicity and Cisco glanced at each other with raised eyebrows.

"Harry it'll be fi-" You were cut off by his lips over yours.

As he pulled back he ran his hand over your cheek. "I'll go."

"Holy shit are you guys together?"

Harry glared over at Cisco and you tried to hide a smile.

"I totally called it," Felicity said as she nudged your side.

"Aw that's great now can we go?" Frost asked feigning annoyance, walking into the room, amused.

Harry gave you a quick kiss. "I'll be right back."

You smiled and nodded. "You better."

---------------------

It was time to go.

Eobard sensed the urgency as the fight continued on, observing the soldiers starting to pull back, their morale shattered by the relentless presence of Overgirl and Supergirl soaring above.

He sighed.

Another weak team.

Another failed attempt.

As he ran he felt Barry catch up to him and he let him grab him.

As he sprinted, Barry caught up, gripping him roughly.

Barry slammed him into a concrete pillar, fury contorting his features as he readied a phasing hand.

Oh, Barry. Did he genuinely believe he could?

Eobard already knew the answer but wanted to test it anyway. "Do it, Barry. End it."

Barry glanced up, panting, pushing his hand just a hair closer to Eobard's chest.

"END IT!"

Barry locked eyes with him and, after a moment, stepped back.

"What's stopping you, Barry?" Eobard taunted, already knowing the answer. "Oh, I forgot. Barry Allen is above killing. Isn't that right?"

Barry glared, pushing Eobard away. "Get out of here."

Eobard smirked. "Till next time, Flash," he said, venom dripping from his words.

"Can't wait," Barry replied, annoyed.

Eobard sprinted off, spotting an icy trail heading towards the Dark Waverider. Intrigued, he followed it.

He witnessed Frost and Amaya dispatching soldiers while the doppelgänger raced toward the controls.

They were here to disable the shields. Eobard didn't bother stopping him; there was no point now. As Harry pressed the big red button to unveil the ship, Eobard ran toward him, whisking him into a separate room.

"What the hell?" Harry looked up, seeing the Reverse Flash before him. "What the hell do you want?"

Eobard rolled his eyes. "Relax. If I wanted you dead, I would've already killed you."

"Then what the hell do you want?"

Eobard sighed. "I want you to know something." There was a pause. "I may have broken her heart, but it doesn't mean I never loved her."

"What a funny way of showing it," Harry said, annoyed.

Eobard scowled, pushing Harry against the wall. "Listen here. I don't expect you to understand, but I do love her. I love her so much, and she deserves so much more. I don't like you, and I wish I could, but she loves you. She picked you."

Harry was silent as Eobard took a step back. "Break her heart, and I'll personally make sure that you are miserable for the rest of your life."

"Harry!"

Both men turned toward the door at the voices calling.

"Get out of here."

Harry nodded as he walked past him.

"For the record," Harry said, glancing back, "she loved you too."

With that, he left, and Eobard sighed, running a hand over his face.

She loved you too.

---------------------

Harry couldn't shake off thoughts of the Reverse Flash. He wasn't expecting confrontation, and Harry knew he wouldn't kill him. In a twisted way, it felt like the Reverse Flash's attempt to move on. Harry shook his head; even a cold-blooded psycho had feelings.

Stepping onto the Waverider, he was enveloped in a tight embrace, and he couldn't help but smile. "I told you I would make it back."

"I never doubted that for a second," you said, smiling up at him.

He kissed you, savoring the moment. There was a lingering press, enough for you to sigh contentedly.

"Come on, let's go blow up that ship."

Returning, Iris congratulated Harry, and Cisco approached with a mischievous grin. "You think you can handle this bad boy, Harry?" he asked, signaling the weapon controls.

"Walk in the park, Kazansky," Harry replied as he took his seat.

"Well, if you run into any problems, you've got your girlfriend right here to help you," Cisco teased.

Harry groaned, and you couldn't help but laugh, playfully hitting Cisco. "Where are you even going, Cisco?"

"To help you down there," Cisco said, creating a breach to the fight below. "I'll be right back."

Harry rolled his eyes. "Come on, Ramon." He pressed the controls and hit the release button.

You watched as the other ship exploded while Cisco breached it so it wouldn't land on civilians below.

You smiled at Harry, and Cisco breached back. "Nailed it!" he exclaimed, with Amaya and Zari behind him.

"I'm detecting dangerously high radiation levels," Gideon interrupted.

"Disembodied voice lady is right," Cisco said as he and Harry looked at the screens, "Supergirl is about to go supernova."

"Supergirl," Harry said over the comms, "Your doppelgänger's about to have a meltdown."

"What do I do?" You heard Kara's concerned voice.

"You need to take her up," he gestured with his hands, "up, up, and away. Now."

You caught Harry's eye and giggled. "Really, Harry? Up, up, and away?"

He laughed. "See, I can be funny."

You rolled your eyes playfully. "Dork."

"Only for you," he said, smiling.

"That's cute. But save it for after we save the world," Cisco said playfully teasing.

A big boom followed before you realized Kara had succeeded. Cheers erupted as Nate announced he had caught Kara from her fall. You kissed Harry as everyone celebrated.

-------------------

After a tiring couple of days, you decided a very, very long nap was in order. Harry had been over and brought Big Belly, leaving when he saw how tired you were, realizing he was tired as well. As much as you would have liked him to cuddle with you, you figured you deserved some time for yourself. So you went on a jog, showered, watched some TV, and caught up on some books you had been wanting to read.

As you finished your latest read, you heard your phone go off, and saw it was a message from Iris.

'Come to the little park by the lake at 4. We're saying bye to Kara and the Legends. Wear something nice.'

You sat there confused. Why would you need to wear something nice for a farewell party?

You knew there was more to this.

You got ready with a smile, picking a simple dress, a flowy sundress that embraced the summer vibes, adorned with delicate floral patterns that mirrored the colors of the sunset. You did your hair before your phone went off again.

'Do you know what all this wearing something nice is about?' -Harry

'I have no clue!' You wrote back.

'I'll pick you up?'

You smiled as you reread the message. 'Of course. See you in a few :)'

You grabbed your purse and headed down. Harry was there, smiling as he greeted you.

"How are you?" He asked as you placed your seatbelt on.

"I'm good. I finally managed to get some good sleep."

He leaned in and placed a kiss on your forehead. "I love you."

You smiled with immense joy radiating through your body. "I love you too."

As he drove, he reached over with his free hand and rubbed your leg before slipping his hand into yours.

As you arrived, you saw Barry, Iris, Oliver, and Felicity, along with Kara and Sara.

You got out, and Sara gave a little wave before giving you a hug. "Take care." She watched as Harry walked towards you. "He's a keeper," she said with a wink as she said bye to Harry.

Kara came over and also hugged you and Iris. "Take care, guys. We'll have to do this again sometime." She frowned. "The hanging out, I mean, not the fighting Nazis," she said, laughing.

You all laughed as she took the device from Oliver to get back to her home.

It was just Iris, Barry, Oliver, and Felicity left.

"Does someone want to tell me why I had to wear 'something nice'?" You said, using your fingers in quotations.

Felicity smiled as Iris said, "Well, considering we had a ceremony, we figured we should probably make it official by exchanging vows."

"Oh! Yes!" You exclaimed excitedly.

"Can mayors ordain weddings?" Barry wondered out loud.

"I'm pretty sure that only applies within the Star City limits," Oliver chuckled.

"We know someone else that could, though," Felicity said as she exchanged looks with Barry before he ran off and returned with Diggle. He looked confused as he felt the effect of speed running and threw up. "Could I get a warning next time?" He said meekly.

"Sorry," Barry said, rubbing the back of his neck shyly, "But we were wondering if you could officiate our vows."

Diggle immediately smiled. "Of course." As Barry and Iris exchanged their vows, you leaned into Harry and sighed happily.

"We all found our happy ending today," he whispered into your ear.

You nodded, a look of content on your face. Harry wished they could live in this moment forever. The air was filled with a mixture of emotions — love, joy, and the bittersweet realization of goodbyes and new beginnings.

Felicity and Oliver shared the same look as Felicity asked him, "Will you marry me?"

Oliver stood there astounded and taken aback but happily agreed. Diggle smiled. "Finally! After watching you two and keeping you together for years, I'm honored to marry all of you."

Both couples kissed as Harry turned you around and placed a kiss on your lips. He pulled back and lifted you to twirl you in a circle, and you laughed as you held on to his neck.

"You think someday that'll be us?" He asked as he set you back down, your foreheads touching.

You hummed in contentment. "Someday."

He smiled, kissing you again, and you knew that even with all the heartache you had been through, you would be happy. You knew you still had some loose ends to handle, but for now, here, there was nothing else you could ask for.

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Hellooooo and sorry for the long wait I hope you all enjoyed it! This is not the end for our story here I still have some more stuff in mind! Thank you to everyone who has been here since the beginning, I LOVE you so much!!! Feel free to leave any comments as well as ideas. :)

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