ironman-tonystark

[ironman-tonystark]

One reason I love Rhodey so much is he never seems impressed by anything I do.

#tony stark musings #shit post #tony stark #james rhodes #rhodey

[ironman-tonystark]

Pete keeps trying to tell me about how hard he finds it to talk to girls, and let me tell you, I cannot relate - at all.

#tony stark musings #shit post #tony stark #peter parker

[ironman-tonystark]

So I have eliminated Clint as the one putting coffee grounds in the garbage disposal. Mostly because I just saw him eating them with a spoon.

#tony stark musings #shit post #tony stark #clint barton

[ironman-tonystark]

What is it about Pepper telling me that we need to talk later that fills me with such dread?

#tony stark musings #shit post #tony stark #pepper potts

[ironman-tonystark]

I'm glad YouTuber wasn't a career choice when I was young, because let me tell you, I never apologize for anything.

#tony stark musings #shit post #tony stark

[ironman-tonystark]

I think Cap might need a vacation. He keeps googling where he can get really big blocks of ice.

#tony stark musings #shit post #tony stark #steve rogers

[ironman-tonystark]

Sometimes I'll be in the common room, drinking a coffee, and Barnes will just wander through in nothing but his pajama pants, with his cat attached to his ankle by her teeth and claws. Yes, I have photos. No, you can't see them.

#tony stark musings #shit post #tony stark #bucky barnes #alpine the cat

[ironman-tonystark]

You all see this, right?

The problem with Barnes being as perpetually grumpy as he is, anytime he's in any way pleasant to someone it feels like a come-on.

#comment reblog #justcallme-bucky

[ironman-tonystark]

We were all talking about those visions that Wanda planted in our head to scare us, back in the day, and Thor started off by saying he was at an orgy and he knew his brother was there. Honestly, he didn't even need to keep going after that. That would scare the hell out of me too.

#tony stark musings #shit post #tony stark #thor #thor odinson #loki #loki laufeyson

[ironman-tonystark]

Pepper told me I needed to eat a little healthier and cut down on the cheeseburgers. I really don't know what I did to be punished like that.

#tony stark musings #shit post #tony stark #pepper potts

[ironman-tonystark]

I cannot believe you would want to deny the world that kind of sexual chemistry, man.

I need to admit something. I have been intentionally keeping Fandral and Stark apart out of fear of what would happen if they were to meet.

#reblog #thor-the-mighty

[ironman-tonystark]

People always think engineering is what I'm best at, but really my biggest talent is having a negative thought and spiraling it out to doom proportions.

#tony stark musings #shit post #tony stark

[ironman-tonystark]

That moment when someone accidentally injures Bruce and everyone just freezes with a look of horror on their face, will never fail to amuse me.

#tony stark musings #shit post #tony stark #bruce banner #hulk #the avengers

[ironman-tonystark]

The team sarcastically calls Cap dad so much that I think if the guy ever had kids, he'd think they were always snarking at him.

#tony stark musings #shit post #tony stark #steve rogers

[ironman-tonystark]

A key part of being a superhero is getting up from a superhero landing as if you didn’t just seriously hurt yourself.

#tony stark musings #shit post #tony stark #the avengers

[ironman-tonystark]

I figure given how he was found, when Steve crashed that plane into the ocean he was stoic and lay down and just let the ice take him. If it were me, they'd have found me flailing my arms and screaming.

#tony stark musings #shit post #tony stark #steve rogers

[ironman-tonystark]

So I've got an idea. When you get irritated with DUM-E and U, you can send them to me, and I'll send my two mini schnauzers to you. It'll be like an exchange program for the irritating. Then we can swap them back after a short period. Because if my dog barks at a leaf falling out of a tree one more time. I may give him to a community college.

I wouldn't recommend that you send your dogs to me. Clint has a knack for keeping people's dogs when he meets them.

#tony stark musings #inbox #somebucky