five-gotham-guys

[five-gotham-guys]

Just saw spoiler yell: I WANNA BE GAY BATMAN at the top of her lungs and Red Hood reply: YOU’RE NOT GAY YOU FUCKING POSER.

Try to top that level of unhingement, super/flash kids.

( I am aware that’s not a word. I’m too tired to think of another one )

#OnlyInGotham

~ Morris

#Morris #only in gotham #red hood #spoiler #stephanie brown #jason todd #batman

[five-gotham-guys]

Guys I know this sounds like I’m spying on Tim drake but I swear I’m not. This guy has the letters in his laptop SO BIG I’m pretty sure they can be read from Italy. But anyways. I was sitting behind him in finance class again and he had an open chat with Jason. It went like this:

Jason: get some milk on your way back

Tim: why?

Jason: pancakes.

Tim: why?

Jason: PANCAKES.

Tim: dude-

Jason: I don’t wanna hear it. Just get the goddamned milk.

Tim: where am I gonna find a goddamned goat in this city?

Jason: goat?

Tim: yeah, for the milk.

Jason: GOAT?

Tim *visibly winces*: let’s just forget for a second I didn’t think about cows.

Tim: OR the whole concept of grocery stores.

Jason: You’re so fucked up in so many levels.

Jason: how many hours did you sleep tonight?

Tim: hours?

Jason: stupid motherfucker. I’m picking you up. You have the complexity of a Victorian white rich sickly boy and the schedule of a crack addict.

Tim: schedule?

Jason: Sweet Lord.

Jason: Be in the parking lot in 10 minutes. I’ll get the goddamned milk.

Tim: <3

So yeah, that was enlightening.

#OnlyInGotham

~ Earl

#Earl #only in gotham #red hood #red robin #batman #jason todd #tim drake

[five-gotham-guys]

My band and I are playing in a downtown pub, Geezers, and there’s a wall with small pictures of every band that’s played there. Dick Grayson’s in one. He played the drums in a heavy metal band. The adopted son of a multibillionare whose favorite sport is to throw money into charity, the Gotham Casanova himself, that’s been known to be an ABBA fan as last year’s pics watching Mamma Mia and singing Chiquitita out of the top of his lungs have proven, the man who buys extra nuggets to share with the kids in the batburger park… he was wearing eyeliner and eyeshadow and looking dead for the pic.

Idk what I though would happen today but this was not it.

#OnlyInGotham

~ Eli

#eli #Dick Grayson #Nightwing #DC #bat burger #jason Todd #red Hood #bruce Wayne #Batman #tim drake #red Robin #robin #Damian Wayne #only in gotham

[five-gotham-guys]

I’m behind Tim Drake in finance class and his laptop’s wallpaper is a drawing of a hyper-realistic cow frowning and wearing a baseball cap backwards.

It’s saying “Not in the MOOd”

#OnlyInGotham

~ Earl

#earl #tim drake #red Robin #Batman #DC comics #bruce wayne #dick grayson #nightwing #red hood #jason todd #damian wayne #robin

[five-gotham-guys]

Robin just appeared with a PIGEON ( I swear it is a pigeon ) and ordered it to attack Red Hood and the mystery-boy on my rooftop. IT OBEYED. I think Red Hood might actually kill him tonight.

You heard it here first

#OnlyInGotham

~ Lars

#lars #robin #red hood #damian wayne #jason Todd #only in Gotham

[five-gotham-guys]

Red Hood brought a guy to our rooftop. RED HOOD BROUGHT A GUY TO OUR ROOFTOP AND THEY’RE WHISPERING. Idk if he’s threatening him or flirting with him but honestly he’s hot so good for Red.

I’m proud of him he looks lonely sometimes.

##OnlyInGotham

~ Lars

#lars #red hood #jason Todd #only in Gotham #robin #Damian Wayne #tim drake #red robin #nightwing #dick grayson #bruce wayne #batman #dc comics

[five-gotham-guys]

We’re all worried about Tim Drake-Wayne’s caffeine addiction but I just saw Richard ( yes, the man who applies sunscreen on his grown-ass-little-brothers’ face ) chug a whole redbull in one go with a straight face and open another one.

Just sayin’ Tim might’ve learned from the actual menace.

#OnlyInGotham

~ Morris

#morris #nightwing #dick grayson #Tim drake #red robin #only in gotham #red hood #jason todd #robin #damian wayne #batman #dc comics

[five-gotham-guys]

Batman stood on tiptoes to kiss superman’s cheek, then jumped off a rooftop. Guys, I think they might be fucking. I do, however, think Superman’s too much of a Boy Scout to sex batsy up, so either they’re married or they’re about to be. You’re welcome.

#OnlyInGotham

~ Eli

#only in Gotham #Superman #Batman #Clark Kent #superbat #bruce Wayne #eli #batboys #superfamily

[five-gotham-guys]

I’m having tea with my mom. Jason and Tim Wayne just came in and I-shit-you-not this was the conversation they were having:

Jason ( tired ): I’m done with college. I’m becoming a millionaire’s sugar baby.

Tim: Jason, you technically ARE a multi-billionaire.

Jason ( realising that ): why haven’t I donated money then?

Tim: ( shrugs )

Jason: [ TAKES OUT HIS CARD, OPENS GOFUNDME AND STARTS DONATING MONEY TO VARIOUS CAUSES. ]

Brucie taught him well. Also, L think I might be in love.

#OnlyInGotham

~ Earl

#only in gotham #jason Todd #red hood #tim drake #red Robin #robin #Ernest #earl

[five-gotham-guys]

Okay now that I’ve calmed down and wrapped bubble-plastic around the fist that Nightwing touched, I can explain what happened:

I was walking to uni because ✨exams✨ ( this was early, like 5:30 a.m early, because I’m an overachiever and I wanted to study beforehand in the 24h library ) and I guess he was calling it a night after patrolling? Idk. ANYWAYS-

I was walking and listening a podcast ( ADHD’s kicking in, sorry. )

THING IS I had my backpack open and my carpet fell off and he picked it up ( WATTPAD STYLE HONESTLY ) and he looked at the notes inside and said- “arts, huh? Wish I were more of an intellectual to actually understand them.”

I was fucking VIBRATING I swear. I’ve never been this gay. I’ve never been gay. I wanna be gay for this man. HIS FACE, GUYS. HE’S PERFECT OMG.

Anyways, he fist-bumped me ( I awkwardly fist-bumped him, my mouth was hanging open and I’m sure I was drooling ) and said: “good luck on your exams, bro”

THEN HE WINKED AT ME AND HE JUMPED ON TOP OF A STREET-GODDAMNED-LIGHT, FELL OFF and then disappeared. Easily the best moment of my day, week or even year; and it was actually my one-year-anniversary with my gf.

#OnlyInGotham

~ Jan

PS: I wanna see other cities’ heroes be better than ours.

#only in Gotham #Nightwing #dick grayson #Batman #batfamily #bruce Wayne #jan

[five-gotham-guys]

NIGHTWING JUST FIST-BUMPED ME AND SAID “GOOD LUCK WITH UR EXAMS BRO” IM ABOUT TO DIE THIS MAN’S SO AHHHHHHH

#OnlyInGotham

~

~Jan

#only in Gotham #Nightwing #Dick Grayson #jan

[five-gotham-guys]

A dumpster just caught fire out of fucking nowhere and two unrelated people honest-to-god reached into their bags, pulled out marshmallows, and toasted them in the street. I feel stupid for not carrying marshmallows now.

#OnlyInGotham

~ Morris

#only in gotham #batfamily #Nightwing #red hood #red Robin #robin #Batman #Morris

[five-gotham-guys]

I was just coming back home from the lab ( 6-7p.m ) and I saw Red Robin fall down right into a dumpster and Red Hood and Nightwing run towards him only to ANXIOUSLY BEG him not to say to Batman that it’s their fault. He said they’re fucked. They closed the garbage lid with him inside. Spoiler appeared, called them pussies, and disappeared again.

#OnlyInGotham

~ Lars

#only in Gotham #red hood #jason todd #Dick Grayson #nightwing #red Robin #tim drake #spoiler #Stephanie brown #Lars