ed-reblogger

[ed-reblogger]

Tw ed/vent

Working with like 5 rl life thinsp0 is so triggering

I wanna be skinnier than all of them, idc if i die

[ed-reblogger]

Ive started studying intensely so i dont get hungry and i can confirm: im getting skinny and smart at the same time

#i Have to try this #maybe ill even get passable grades....

[ed-reblogger]

TW! ed mentions> tips on how to get ur binging under control

i recently got my binging under control which i forgot to say but it’s kinda obvious cuz i’ve been losing weight again and fasting! so i decided to share some tips i guess:

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the first thing i’m gonna say is that it takes time! start off doing the easier things and then eventually u could bring ur restriction levels higher if u chose to! one of my biggest mistakes is at the PEAK of my binging i was doing all of the most difficult restrictions and it led to MORE binging! 

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-stay OUT of the house. if you get the sudden urge that ur gonna binge once u get home here are somethings u could do:

1.) go into a random store and buy urself something like gum, an energy drink, wtvr else and then enjoy that before you get home. listen to ur fav sadish or ana playlist while u do that and genuinely EVERY TIME my urge to binge goes away(lmk if u want songs)

2.)(not recommended if you are still deep in ur binge cycle cuz it could be dangerous to some ppl SO BE CAREFUL> you know urself, if ur still gonna binge on this don’t do it) go into a random store and buy gummy vitamins , they’re usually like 5-10 cals, even if u eat like a handful(don’t recommend cuz they're still vitamins but if u do it like once it’s fine).what i do is i buy them and then take tiny bites of the serving size or suck on them until they dissolve. plus it usually lasts u like a good couple months depending on how big the bottle or serving size is!

3.) just don’t go home until the binging urge is gone, take urself shopping, do something tedious outside your house! 

4.) if you don’t live in a big city like me, they’re might not be as much to do! but don’t make excuses for urself, if u live in a boring neighborhood who cares, go for a long walk with a nice playlist or podcast! if u have pets, walk ur dog. it doesn’t sound that entertaining but i’ve grown to really enjoy my alone time walking. you’ll also get ur steps up! walking a lot is definitely gonna improve ur mood and a good mood is great to avoiding a binge

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okay the second thing you should do is have 0-10calorie food options at home. this is definitely harder for some people because we don’t live alone! but if you hide little things around your room, you won’t need to go into the kitchen for stuff that you didn’t buy but ur tempted with! 

-for example yesterday i had 5 calorie jello! the serving size was so big i almost didn’t finish it all

-i also crush ice in my blender until it’s super smooth like snow and add 0 calorie flavorings into it!

-i have gum ALL over my room

-0 calorie drinks

-tea

-coffee

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3.) MAKE SURE UR DRINKING WATER. being dehydrated can make u feel like u need to binge, but realllyyyyy all u need is some water!

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4.) -play tedious games like the sims! it’s super fun and u could make sims that look like u but at ur goal weight! ik that sounds weird but it’s honestly rlly comforting LOL

-another game could be roblox… embarrassing ik but it’s fun 

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5.) if ur like me and have a shit ton of hw or even work for ur job that you have been putting off, make a day out of it! bring ur laptop or ur work to a nice coffee shop or park spot if u don’t wanna do it at home :) the options are unlimited! and if u trust urself at home, do it there. the fact that you’ll have just SOMETHING off ur to do list is gonna make u feel so much better

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6.) this is if ur at the PEAK of ur binge cycle: buy NUTS! i’m telling you guys BUY NUTS! don’t get discouraged by the calorie label, ik it looks like a lot but our body intakes calories differently with different foods and u absorb nut calories less than u would others if that makes sense

^^^they take a long time to eat and they’re so filling! i know that even if ur full u still can feel like u have to keep going but that’s never happened to that extreme with nuts for me! if this doesn’t work for u tho, think of another healthyish food

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7.) if you can’t leave the house take LONGGGG baths!! like 2 hrs im serious it helps to calm u down and clear ur head! 

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i hope this was helpful :) ik it’s kinda basic info but i felt like sharing it for ppl struggling like i was 

[ed-reblogger]

i don't want to be thin so i can wear skin-tight clothes.

i want to wear baggy, oversize clothes. i want my skinny thighs to peak out from under big knit sweaters. i want my hip bones to jut out from under loose, low-rise jeans. i want my skinny hands to be swallowed by long sleeves. i want oversize blazers to hang off my narrow shoulders.

i want to look effortless.

[ed-reblogger]

Drugs and music are an escape from reality.

[ed-reblogger]

Do ppl w/o eds just eat whatever they want whenever they want?? And do they not feel an extreme need to either exercise or puke after?

What do they even do with the extra time from not having to count the cals of everything eat????

#i wish i never met all the disordered ppl in my life #maybe I'd still be able to eat my favourite foods without feeling shame #anyways #good night #stupid thoughts #my mental illness is showing #vent post #e4t1ng d1s0rd3r #tw ana shit #ed but not sheeran #tw edd #ana trigger #4n4m14 #tw ana related #fuck my life #disordered eating thoughts #tw eating issues

[ed-reblogger]

i can ""forget to eat"", but my healthy friends NEED sustenance okay

[ed-reblogger]

i miss october

#everything was so much easier #i partied #i met new ppl #i felt happy a lot more often #every day was a new and different day #now it all feels so same-y #but i dont have enough energy to do anything about it #i think i might get a therapist in 2023 #to start the next year on a different note #stupid thoughts #mental health #my quest to get therapy #my mental illness is showing #vent post #tw kms #tw sui ideation

[ed-reblogger]

i tried eating like a normal person does during christmas, but now I just feel sick

#mental health #my mental illness is showing #tw edd #tw eating issues #tw ana related #vent post #3dblr #e4t1ng d1s0rd3r #tw ana shit #stupid thoughts #4n4m14

[ed-reblogger]

that moment u realize that if ur sister died you'd kys and then ur parents would end up all alone...

#late night realizations are the worst #wishing i could just turn my brain off #i dont wanna kms but she's the only thing keeping me alive #i would never let her know that tho #putting so much pressure on a basically 10y/o is just evil #anyways #I'll try going back to enjoying the weirdly philosophical christmas conversations:) #tw sui ideation #tw kms #suicide tw #stupid thoughts #my quest to get therapy #su1c1dal #mental health #my mental illness is showing

[ed-reblogger]

it's cristmas time, we know what that means!

#i love christmas #BUT i feel so bad if i dont eat the food my mum spent ages on #and i know a lot of my friends gave me baked goods and candy #hopefully my sis wants some sweets:) #wintergirls #i actually just finished the book! #its the perfect kind of triggering #tw eating issues #tw edd #disordered eating thoughts #vent post #tw ana shit #ed motivation #stupid thoughts #mental health #eat1ng dis0rder #e4t1ng d1s0rd3r #my mental illness is showing

[ed-reblogger]

storytime about that time the blu da bo dee da bo da song saved my life:

I was sitting in my windowsill, listening to some sad song from "top throwbacks 2022" Spotify playlist, the cold december air chilling my feet, wondering how painful the fall would be, how likely that someone would hear me hit the ground and come running out. could the ambulance come driving fast enough? hopefully not.

then blue da ba dee comes on. I walk back to bed. I am stupid. I am overdramatic. I dont even have a good reason to kms. its Christmas, i should be happy:)

#vent post #suicide tw #tw sui ideation #stupid thoughts #tw kms #i should get therapy #my quest to get therapy #btw this just happened #i just think story times are a cool way of framing stuff #but i definitely wont get any sleep tonight #its so cold #good night