thomine

[thomine]

is there any benefits to staying on tumblr...

#slocrastinating #i know i said hiatus until may. but i've been thinking. what if i just become an ao3 only writer. i've been thinking abt this forever #is there any benefits being on tumblr #does it even matter #to the ppl who follow me on tumblr... it wld be nice to know your thoughts haha #the only thing i can think of is having a tumblr to check up on friends and their posts #but other than that. idk #ok good bye again i've replied to everyone. feels like i'm selling my things lol

[thomine]

AUTHOR'S COMMENTARY; like a ripple in a pond

Index

fic basic stats

notes

deviation

title

overall

⠀

Basic Stats

pairing: heizou / reader

time: i started working on this fic a day after valentine's day... so this fic took months.

total word count: 18k words, close to 19k words. i know... i'm shocked myself... but it makes sense considering this fic had 6 drafts. 5 drafts just for fleshing out the story and the 6th to touch up on the 5th draft.

deviation: 4/5

*deviation from original is on a scale of 1-5, 1 being there was no change and 5 being it was completely changed.

⠀

Notes

i was so close to giving up on this fic. but i badly wanted to write something for heizou and this was the only idea i had for him. i didn't want to add any more wips, lol. but, somehow, after my friend briefly lamented about the heizou drought, i had this conviction that i would get this heizou fic written. i partially did the heizou hang out and suddenly, the story i was battling with for 4 drafts came together in the 5th. it's not magic, but writing really feels like magic sometimes, haha. wrote 4k words in one sitting, and then proceeded to add and adjust it for the fic to be what it is. i'm really excited to share this because i wanted to break through and write longer fics, and this is proof that i can do it! so i'm really happy!

⠀

Deviation

now, with 5 drafts... you might be wondering... what the heck happened? a lot. a lot changed and a lot stayed. you can check out my thoughts as i worked on the story through this tag on my wip blog.

this was originally supposed to be a valentine's day fic, because i had this idea of using valentine's day couple promotions. the idea was fake dating, with heizou and reader pretending to be a couple to get some delicious katusdon, only for heizou to not appear for the next year. that year, reader, determined to get the discount, went with a random stranger they could rope into their plan. it worked, but unfortunately, the rules changed the next year where couples have to prove their relationship. this made heizou kiss reader and they go back and talk about the kiss because, surprise, surprise, both of them actually liked each other!

but the reason why it was not working was... the more i wrote, the harder it was to justify why heizou disappeared for that one year. and details were just not aligning with each other. for example, a year's time is very long. so what if someone appears with different partners? a lot can happen in a year. and i couldn't write the ending scene where reader comes to their senses and realise they do like heizou.

as i was fumbling for ideas, i remembered the titles that a good friend of mine gave. one of them was LIES, AND THE TRUTH THEY REVEAL, so i started leaning more towards the idea of reader lying about their feelings.

unfortunately, that did not work out too well. but, one day, as i was just chilling, i had this sudden thought that... when you're infatuated with someone, sometimes you'll lie to yourself to go to certain places so that you can bump into them. it's a little bit like stalking but this point is for another story. i tried to expand on the idea that reader was visiting places that heizou would be... but heizou was really hard to track down... like. he would only be found if he wanted to be found, so reader's efforts wouldn't be fruitful (unless i went full stalker route with the story, which i played around with for a while). this was the start of the 4th draft iirc…

at one point i decided not to have a kiss scene. (sorry, my only idea of romance is kissing.) as i started expanding on this idea of "going somewhere in hopes to bump into the person you like"... somehow the kiss scene came back, LOL.

playing heizou's story quest really helped as i managed to pick out traits he liked in a person, as well as his mentality and attitude towards some things, which also sort of explained why the first idea didn't work out for him. probably another character, but not heizou.

welp. so in conclusion, the story deviated a lot. the kiss scene stayed, and reader's reluctance to admit they liked heizou also stayed. or more like liking heizou is a dangerous game, something i wrote half-heartedly in one of my earlier drafts. i even shared that snippet but i wasn’t sure why i felt that paragraph was good. i guess that's the core of the fic?

⠀

Title

some might have realised that... the title in my WIP masterlist is not the same as the title i ended up going with. another title i considered was UN-CON A CON MAN. however, the story somehow did not involve a lot of lying at all? or at least, if i were to use the titles for a story, i would like it to have more lying and scheming involved, which this fic does not. so i went through my list of titles and stumbled upon LIKE RIPPLES IN A POND. i don't really know why i was drawn to it, but i chose it, and it made draft 5 really smooth.

it was only during the beta phase did i think deeper about the connection between the title and the story. i quite like the implications because what i came up with was... in heizou's point of view, ripples can only happen if another ripple happened. like, there needs to be a sequence of events, which ties to his disbelief in coincidence. a lot of the fic talks or briefly mentions how reader and heizou meet each other again. everything is supposed to feel like a coincidence but if you think about it, it's not. it's because of a previous action that laid the foundation for the next, and the next.

for reader's point of view... i added it somewhere in the story but they are compared to a ripple because their actions are small but make a large impact. the character of reader is someone pretty submissive or unwilling to hear their own feelings, so they have a lot of pent up emotions and desires that they don't voice, and this is something only intuitive and observant heizou noticed in the story. (bertha doesn't count because reader had to say it for her to be like... oh... oh man :( you need to speak up!! she probably would not have learned of this if she didn't pester reader about them rejecting her invitations to tour the city together. i don't know if i made that clear.)

do i wish i incorporated the title more closely with the writing style? a little, but at the same time i wanted the fic to focus more on the mystery than the poetry, and i do not have the skills to weave both poetic prose with the sense of... mystery. if that make sense.

⠀

Overall

again, sometimes writing feels like magic. i don't really know how to explain how i got from one point to another. most of it is done by instinct or feelings that something is right and something is wrong. another thing is... sometimes i don't even know the meaning of some decisions until much later, when i can piece back the dots. it can be really frustrating to write like that, but i think it's also equally satisfying because you'll be surprised by what you can do.

i hope to be able to write more fics like these! and also be able to sharpen my eyes to eventually write long fics more smoothly. or to also train myself to have a bit more control in senses so i can be more directive with writing rather than just "go with the flow". (balance is good.)

this is probably the most i've written for a story. it's pretty encouraging, haha.

#root branches #ok now i will realllly dip. i will go back to my hiatus #i was online just to get this out for my friend before we get h.eizou crumbs & now it is complete #i shall focus on life good bye

[thomine]

like a ripple in a pond | heizou

PAIRING | heizou / reader

TAGS | general audiences, mystery, minor npc oc, mystery, kiss, canon compliant, happens after inazuma archon quest (but knowledge on the quest is not needed)

SUMMARY | heizou does not believe in coincidences, so seeing you at tenryou street piqued his curiosity. however, it's not your appearance on a street you hardly frequent that bothers him. it's your expression.

WORD COUNT | 5.1k words

INFO | title given by @isekyaaa | beta'ed by ekolu & mimkyu | ao3 | more

When he crosses paths with you on his way home, the shocked expression you have when he calls your name tickles his intuition.

Nothing is a coincidence, Heizou believes, and he should be the one that’s surprised.

First, his office is located in Tenryou, and it’s also in Inazuma City, the place he lives. It’s no anomaly to see him on the street. Second, you live in a village far away. Third, you only ever visit Yae Publishing House during your trips to the city. 

The girl at your side might be a clue though.

When Heizou walks over with a big smile to say hello, the girl stands awkwardly, hands itching for a handshake, but she is also poised for a bow. She doesn’t seem like a local. He wants to assume she’s your friend, but if you are visiting someone you rarely hang out with, casual clothes might not be your choice of wear.

With all these pieces, Heizou is seeing a clearer picture of the situation. You’re giving a tour to someone from another nation. How sweet. However, that does not explain why you are shocked to see him. The Tenryou Commission did send a search party to find his whereabouts, so maybe you chanced upon this rumour and thought he was missing. But you know him. He is never lost with his intuition in the lead. You’re the last person he expects to fall for such stories.

He exchanges greetings with you, and you give a pleasant smile, but soon return to that new distant demeanour of yours. It has been a month since he last saw you at the publishing house. You were always joyful to meet him, sometimes even gracing him with snacks from your home as both of you chewed on dried lavender melon while discussing mystery novels. This is a change he isn’t prepared for, so he focuses on the girl by your side.

“My name is Shikanoin Heizou, a special detective working for the Tenryou Commission. Welcome to Inazuma,” he says as he extends his hand to the foreigner.

Her eyes flit Heizou up and down, and although she tries to be polite, Heizou can sense some doubt in his claim as a detective, not to mention a special one. She returns a friendly grip, body relaxed, but tenses up again. Her eyes beg at you for some guidance, but you’re deep in contemplation.

“It’s nice to meet you Shikanoin… Heizou?” she says after her failed call for your attention. She then introduces herself as Bertha, and Heizou smiles at her name. So she’s from Mondstadt.

“You can call me Heizou.”

Bertha loosens up, releasing a faint sigh. “Oh, I’m glad I didn’t offend you. I heard that some people like to be called by their first name, but some are stricter and only want to be called by their last name.”

“Not at all. I don’t find it a big deal, but if you remember my full name, it might come in handy if you find yourself in a tight pinch.” 

“Oh, that’s really nice of you,” she says in a way that’s hard to decipher if she’s being friendly or she means it. “There were a few instances I did feel unwelcomed,” Bertha mumbles, then she returns to her cheerful self and continues, “but you’re really too kind. Your friend too! I was lost but your friend offered to be my guide for free!”

“I had time to spare,” you bashfully say, walking closer to Heizou. “Can I speak to you for a bit?” You give Bertha a sheepish smile. “I have some matters to discuss with him. We’ll be back! Give us a minute.”

Before she can respond properly, you’re walking down the road. Heizou tips his head to Bertha as a small note of parting and follows suit. Questions sharpen his senses as he scavenges you for keywords. You’re restless. Tired too. Each observation adds a layer to his hill of concern for you. What have you been doing the past month to end up in such a state?

“Actually… I am lost,” you admit after finding a good place out of Bertha’s earshot. You glance behind Heizou to watch her. He takes note how she seems more interested to ask about an Inazuma charm than ask for directions from the nearby store owner. “Bertha wants to go to Komore Teahouse and I thought I knew the way but I guess… I overestimated myself.”

Getting lost… Thinking you’ll know the way but not really… Heizou taps his forehead. Have you been frequenting Inazuma City? It explains your tiredness. The walk back to your village requires climbing and sometimes bandits loiter the paths. It matches your predicament too. Increased visits to the city made you confident you can navigate it by yourself… but if you did frequent the city, would you be lost? Unless you’re only visiting a few places, and Komore Teahouse is out of your parameters.

“Where did you meet Bertha?” Heizou asks. You are taken aback by his question. Reasonably so since the starting point does not matter when someone is lost. Even a baby is aware of this. “If you tell me, we will know where you took a wrong turn. You won’t get lost again.”

After a bit of hesitance, you oblige. “I saw her at Ogura Textile and Kimonos. I took a left turn believing it was a shortcut but… no success. What a relief that you appeared. She still thinks I can guide her. I wouldn’t want her to know I’ve been leading her to nowhere. Plus, how embarrassing… I approached to help but I ended up being lost as well.”

Heizou’s intuition pricks.

Your expression when you saw him had no inclination of relief. Not that it was hostile—it was surprise, mixed with a drop of disbelief.

“Then it must also be a relief to hear that you’re walking in the right direction,” Heizou says, smiling at the way your eyes light up. “Since you’re on the main road, it’s easy. Walk straight and just before the staircase to Hanamizaka, that’s when you turn to your left.”

“Thank you,” you say, but there is something else on your tongue you’re not sharing. He can tell from the way you lick your lips and press them together, as if sealing an envelope. 

Heizou spent his past few days tracking down a case. It was exhilarating to enter the ruins and find treasure hoarders deep in their mischief. This case of you, however, is a different kind of exhilarating. 

His intuition blares, warning him not to let this moment go. Not that he will. His brain is whirring with possibilities of what he can dig, and he isn’t satisfied with all the information he currently has.

“Perhaps I can join you, just in case,” he offers.

You stiffen. 

“It’s a straightforward path and I’m sure you can manage yourself,” Heizou says, “but my way home is in the same direction. It won’t hurt to do a little detour, would it?”

You furrow your eyebrows and watch Heizou suspiciously. 

“You’re suspecting something…”

“Aiyaya, how quick you are to accuse me. I just want to follow along.”

“And…?”

“And?” Heizou repeats, hands on his hips, smile stretching playfully. If he stitched everything right, Heizou is a problem to you, but he wasn’t one a month ago. Something has happened, and his intuition is telling him he has to find out why before it’s too late. “Aren’t you happy you bumped into me?”

“Relieved,” you correct. Heizou is smirking, silently arguing that it’s the same, and your quietness is your agreement. “If it doesn’t bother you, I don’t see why not…” you relent. It is never nice using your inability to say no to his advantage, but this is necessary to unearth your strange behaviour.

Heizou snaps his fingers in delight. He was worried he’ll have to return to paperwork after his cases. His intuition to leave for the publishing house a little later today was genius, serving him a delicious find.

“We shouldn’t keep Bertha waiting, should we?” He asks, and you sigh, deflated, but when you look at him, you have a restrained giddy smile on your face. Locking eyes with him, however, makes you squirm and you stare at the ground as if to collect your strength, yet you aren’t afraid of him like Bertha is. You’re standing close, almost as if preparing for the winds to sway you to bump into his shoulder.

His intuition tingles.

Oh.

How very exciting.

You are surprisingly well known in Inazuma City, Heizou observes, and although it distracts them from making their way to Komore Teahouse, the small conversations reveal plenty about you. Some of his colleagues recognise you, and interestingly they aren’t doushin that patrol the city. Ogura Textile and Kimono shop is just by the entrance of the police station. It should be expected that doushin will find you familiar if you’re frequently within the area… but they seem too friendly for you to be a face they witness crossing the streets on a regular basis.

He tries to ignore the small bud of green in his stomach, covering it with a yawn as one of his colleagues brag about his accomplishments. You’re nodding, listening, but your eyes wander too much. Sometimes you seem to be staring into space. After a minute or so, Heizou decides to save you from your misery, pulling you away.

An old lady also stopped the group to give you groceries in exchange for a kind act you did, which you eventually accepted so she could let you off. 

Heizou can see Bertha’s eyes grow with innocent admiration with every pit stop. When you introduce her as your friend to the locals, they extend their warm greetings. It isn’t a surprise when, at the teahouse, she frantically requests to exchange contacts. She even reveals the address of her lodging in Inazuma City, practically begging you to find her.

Only you. It seems Heizou is redacted out of the situation, left to stand at the side and wait.

“I am truly so grateful. I came to Inazuma alone believing it will be a smooth trip. Who knew my understanding of the Inazuma script and local customs is so shallow…” Bertha clasps both your hands. “You really saved me back there.”

“Oh, it’s not a big deal,” you say like a saint. “I’ll be happy to help within my means. But, um… could you let go of my hands now?”

“Oh, sorry.” Bertha looks as if you struck a knife in her chest.

“N–not that I hate it or anything—I can’t delay any longer. It’s getting late and I need to go home.” 

Heizou wants to laugh. There you go again letting people do as they want with you. Physical contact is not part of Inazuma’s culture, so he knows you’re at least uncomfortable. Bertha doesn’t need to know that though. She looks at the darkening sky and agrees, bidding you goodbye, and waves to Heizou as an afterthought.

You seem weary, and Heizou almost feels culpable approaching you for what he’s going to say next.

“Let me walk you home.”

‘Almost’ because the stupor in your expression is worth it.

“Yes, you shouldn’t walk me back home.”

“Okay, let’s go.”

“No, wait, I said you shouldn’t!”

“But you said ‘yes’.”

“As a detective, you shouldn’t cherry pick your clues.”

“As a detective, I am supposed to pick up things between the lines.”

“No, no, no. You’re reading this wrong. I don’t need you to walk me back home. I know the way and—wait a minute. I should just go now. The more we talk, the later it’s going to get. Good bye. It was nice meeting you.”

Heizou expects you to dash away, as your words imply, but you’re walking at a comfortable pace, and after a few metres, you do look back.

“I said not to follow me,” you hiss, intending it to be a warning but you sound conflicted instead.

“That’s hard when you’re making it too easy to do so.”

To his surprise, you stop and turn. You take a step closer to him and corner him like a culprit. Heizou is tempted to raise his hands in surrender, but he just smirks instead.

“Listen here, smart guy. I don’t know what you’re thinking but whatever you’re thinking of is wrong. You should just go your merry way and I will go on my own.”

“Then answer me this question, and your prize is that I’ll leave you alone.”

You shrink, looking uncertain.

“I’ll hear it first.”

He clears his throat comedically, adjusting his attire as he straightens his back, then stares into your eyes. You look away before returning with a gaze of equal determination.

“Can you explain what you’ve been doing near the police station?”

As if Heizou got caught in his own webbed game, you smile, eyes narrowing. The hunter has become the hunted it seems, when you so readily answer him.

“I guess you don’t know, but I am a freelancer who occasionally delivers parcels in Inazuma City. Most of the orders—well, the ones I take anyways—are to the police station.” 

He tilts his head and looks at you. You’re really bad at lying, needing every word of yours to be factually correct. In some sense that’s your charm. Under his inquisitive presence, you falter for a split second before steeling yourself.

You’re trying to throw him off from his original hypothesis. That has to be the reason why you’re still shaky in some aspects of your stance. You didn’t reveal any new information, but it’s nice to know his assumption that you frequent only the police station is correct, aligning with how you could not find Komore Teahouse.

With your guards up, it’s not easy to get more out of you. Regardless, the sun is no longer in the sky and the city is illuminated by street lamps. It is a great condition for one thing…

“Look at the time. I don’t think you should go home alone when you don’t have a weapon or vision to defend yourself. I guess it is in my interest to accompany you.”

You open your mouth in rebuttal but squeeze your eyes. Then, your raised index finger filled with accusatory intentions falls to your side as your shoulders slump.

“Fine. If you think it’s not a nuisance.”

You’re reluctant at first, answering his questions plainly, but as the night deepens, you start speaking the way you used to at the publishing house. Excitedly, you rap about your trivial adventures at the village, recounting tales like a narrator observing life unfold. In your good mood, Heizou tries asking about your delivery job, but you change the subject to ask about his cases. When you try to sneak a few questions on his whereabouts to piece together the incidents that led him to appear at Tenryou street, he gives you what you want, but, tit-for-tat, he doesn’t reveal he was on his way to the publishing house. 

When you reach home, you’re all smiles, as if you did not oppose his suggestion to walk you back home at all.

His intuition tingles.

He’s getting closer to the truth.

“That helpful delivery person has not come in weeks,” a colleague of Heizou laments as he enters a restaurant well known to tourists and high flyers, not so much doushin. “I ordered something and I was hoping it’d be that freelancer to arrive, but it was just a regular employee from Komaniya Express.”

“Oh, I know that freelancer—Heizou’s friend, right?”

Heizou does not say anything as he enters the restaurant after his colleagues for lunch. Many have commented his increased presence in the city is strange considering his love for pursuing personal cases that leads him to other islands of Inazuma, but no matter how much they poke, Heizou does not say anything more than he has personal dealings in Inazuma City.

Unfortunately, you haven’t stepped foot into the city for a while, puzzling him. His intuition doesn’t lead him anywhere else.

“Oi, Brother Heizou, help your brothers out, would ya? We want to know more about your friend.”

Something ugly buzzes in his gut. Over the weeks, as he dug for more evidence to solidify his hypothesis, he learned a lot about you. He has known you for a while, but only as a novel enthusiast. His first encounter with you was at the Publishing House, and buying novels was the only reason you travelled the distance from your village to the City. He didn’t question much and left after he browsed through the shelves, but you were always there when he visited, and it was fun having discourse with you on the reality of these novels.

Turns out you took the long journey to the bookstore not just for yourself, but to buy books for the village. The old lady you bumped into? She is from your hometown. She was visiting her grandson who lived in the city, and that grandson, inspired by the books you brought back, decided to chase his dreams. He’s apparently an up-and-coming novelist.

As gentle as ripples on a pond, sometimes he worries how fragile you are, but it amazes him how large your small actions become.

To have his colleagues fawn over you is expected considering your deeds, but Heizou still doesn’t like it.

“Aiyaya, it’s a little too early to be talking about all this. We haven’t even ordered our meals. Come, Uesugi, what do you want to eat?” 

Uesugi, a colleague, brightens up at the invitation, and the boys holler and hoot as they scan the menu.

In the midst of chaos, a voice finds its way to Heizou’s ears. 

It’s Bertha. She dashes towards Heizou’s position, uncaring about the way his colleagues fall silent and watch her with great curiosity. Heizou doesn’t care either. What he cares for is if you are with her, and if you are, then his intuition is right. Bertha is the reason you’ll visit the city again.

“Oh, it’s such a pleasure to meet you! We were just talking about you. Come, let me show you where we’re seated.”

Without any warning, Bertha grabs his hand and drags him up the stairs. Heizou’s colleagues just gawk. Even their honed quick reflexes are no match against the shock that sits them in their place, and he is carried away before they know it.

“We’ll order for you!” one of them shouts before Heizou is gone.

He has no idea how Bertha has the strength to sprint up the stairs. Upon reaching the second floor, he is slightly exhausted but tries to compose himself when he spots you sitting at a nearby table. You’re sipping your drink, and when you notice him, you almost choke.

“Take a seat!” Bertha gestures to the seat beside you. You cough, twisting your body away from him. It is only after you take a deep breath do you sit proper, straining your face to remain expressionless.

“Bertha,” you say with a controlled voice, “Your break to the toilet was faster than I expected.”

“That,” she says, pursing her lips in embarrassment, “I actually forgot about that because I was so excited. I shall go now.” But it seems as if it is intentional, for she giggles on her way down the stairs.

Heizou pulls out the chair opposite you instead since Bertha is gone. Plus, he’ll give himself till Bertha returns. The longer he stays, the more questions his brothers will ask him. You do not like being bombarded with grand gestures, something his colleagues will do when they realise you’re in the vicinity.

You return to your drink, staring at the table.

“How’s lunch—” you say. 

“It’s nice to see you around—” he says as well.

Both of you gently laugh. He gestures for you to go first.

“I didn’t know you'd eat lunch at this restaurant. You don’t seem like someone who likes fancy food.”

“That’s right. I prefer more homely dishes, but my friends wanted something special.” 

“Special? Is today a special day? Wait a minute, when is your birthday?”

Heizou chuckles, leaning against the table. “It’s not my birthday. They’re just being sentimental that I’m around. I am their model employee.”

You nod, laughing, and then fade to silence.

“It’s nice to see you around,” Heizou starts. You’re almost back to your normal self, it seems. Less tense, less rigid. More welcoming. Still, a streak of sadness stains your mien.

“Yeah… Bertha wanted me to accompany her through her itinerary. She’s invited me to join her a few times but I declined, and then I felt horrible about it… This is the second of the seven places she wants to visit. I’m in for a long day, huh.”

“Is that why you haven’t been doing deliveries, then?”

“Not really,” you say, shrinking into your seat. “Did… Bertha say anything to you?”

Oh? Heizou can feel his lips curving into a smirk. She did drop that you were talking to her about him. He tries to control his expression and tap his temple in thought.

“Perhaps she did…”

You jump in your seat, hands reaching out to create some barrier between him and you.  “Look, I can explain. I–I–”

“You can when I walk you home,” Heizou says as he stands. “I believe you’ll have a long day today, and it’ll be dangerous for you to go home yourself. I’ll meet you at Bertha’s.”

“Wait, I don’t know when I’ll end. How about I meet you at the police station?”

The rowdiness from his peers below reminds him of their casual talk about you.

“The hostel is fine. If not, I'll wait for you. How about that?”

“I don’t really have a choice if I want to explain myself, right…”

“You’re right,” he teases. You look down in your seat, but he manages to catch you biting your lip to abate a nervous smile. “I’m not giving you another opportunity.”

He leaves, crossing paths with Bertha on his way down the stairs. She’s upset he can’t stay, but understands that he’s still on the clock and the meal his colleagues ordered for him has probably arrived. She bids farewell and Heizou rejoins with his friends.

They pester him with questions on who Bertha is, which he answers honestly. A few catch on that Bertha isn’t alone and asks who the other person might be. 

“Even a detective should have his secrets,” he says, then smiles and stuffs himself with food.

As quick eaters and obedient guards of the Tenryou Commission, they finish their meal before lunch break ends. Thankfully, neither you nor Bertha make your way down. As some quip about you and their sadness for your absence the past few weeks, Heizou can’t stop grinning.

His intuition is always right.

He’s looking forward to tonight.

Heizou throws his jitte into the air, catching it by hooking the handle with his index before spinning it idly. He has been waiting for 10 minutes with you nowhere in sight. He’s surprisingly optimistic though, especially considering Bertha’s personality. She will not let you slip away. It’s highly likely she knows of your meet up with Heizou at the end of the day. She would have pestered you for details, and you’ll give what she wants. 

“Sorry to keep you waiting…” you say behind him. He turns, confused why you’ll appear from the hostel, only to have his eyes feast on a wonderful sight. His jitte drops to his floor. You’re wearing traditional clothing, styled and tailored in a way that perfectly brings out your form. Heizou’s heart almost forgets its job. He bends down to pick his weapon.

“Bertha decided to use me as a model… uh…” You lift your sleeves and twist to look at yourself. “This is making things worse, isn’t it?”

“Where are your clothes?”

You sink, hands covering your face. Heizou kneels with you.

“I wasn’t paying attention and bumped into someone who spilled noodles on me.”

Nothing happens out of coincidence, Heizou believes. 

You groan. “I’m making this worse for myself.” Your hands are shaking, so he takes them gently in his and gives them an encouraging squeeze before standing to pull you up.

“I wonder what was on your mind,” he asks, partially knowing the answer. You don’t release your grip on him even though you’re on your feet.

You sigh. “This is the time for it to all be revealed, isn’t it? Although I believe you already figured it out.”

“I’m not a mind reader,” he says. “Even if I do know, don’t you want to say it?”

“No, I don’t.” You keep your head low. “Not really.”

He keeps quiet, patiently waiting for your next move. You look at his hand that’s holding yours, then at him before your face is stricken with nervousness. He gives an encouraging squeeze.

“Do you remember our first meeting?” you ask.

“At Yae’s Publishing House.”

A small smile graces your features as you seem to reminisce. “Your wit captivated me. I found you so charming, but scary. You could understand every twist and turn of the novels, I was envious.”

Heizou nods. He remembers that, and at that time he was grateful for your agreement. Normally people push aside his own beliefs, or even accuse his intuition to be child’s play. There’s a reason people call him peculiar and eccentric. It took a while to gather the trust of his comrades he currently calls his brothers, but you trusted him immediately. That made it easy to get along with you. He might not admit it, but meeting you was his highlights, not the best seller books.

“As we talked more, I started to like you, Heizou.”

The ambience is thick with suspense. It is what he expects to hear, but he stands, now the stunned one, unable to fathom the honesty in your gaze.

You finally pull your hand away from his grip. 

“When you stopped appearing at the publishing house, I wanted to see you again, so I tried many excuses to visit Inazuma City in hopes I’d bump into you. Truthfully, I was a little offended that when I tried, you were nowhere to be found. Then, just when I gave up, you were there. ” 

“You quit your job as a delivery person, didn’t you?”

You nod.

“And,” Heizou adds, “the day we met would be your last day in the city.”

“I went to the publishing house without fail. Went for multiple trips and even stayed there for a whole day just to increase my chances. I always wondered when we would meet again.”

As you speak, your head lowers. You touch your attire, eyeing it carefully. “I was thinking about what will happen now before I got noodles all over myself. I was so nervous, but Bertha is right. Keeping these feelings inside isn’t doing me any good. I rejected her invitation because I didn’t want to go to the city, to have anything to do with you… but I eventually agreed because it felt too good to be true that we walked home, and maybe I’m greedy…”

You lean against the wall, arms hugging yourself as an attempt to be smaller.

“She said if I don’t tell you, she’ll do it for me as the highlight of her trip before she leaves. Knowing how she is, I was worried she’ll give you a run down version of my feelings as the truth. I know I said I like you, but I’m really here to say I’m not going to anymore.”

Heizou can only stare. Soaked in sincerity and moonlight, you’re enthralling.

“This is so embarrassing,” you admit, facing his nonplus reaction. “You shouldn’t say anything. I’ll just go home now.”

Heizou wants to grab you before you elude him, but his intuition freezes him in place. Where is the joy in that if you succumb to his plea? At this moment, there is no greater test for you than him giving you the space to express yourself. For once, you don’t have to adhere to other’s desires, and in the quiet, he hopes you can hear your own. So he stands at the entrance of the hostel as he watches you go. Each step, his heart aches. His hands itch to reach forward, but he keeps them to his side. 

His intuition is always right.

You stop your march.

Slowly, you look back, and you dash towards him.

“It’s not easy to like you,” you confess when you return, panting. “And I keep telling myself I can stop liking you if I don’t see you but I’ll remember how we would talk for hours and I’d fall in love with the way your mind works, and then spiral into a mess of listing everything amazing about you.”

For a long time, you have been at the back of his mind too. While he runs around Inazuma, led by his intuition, he wonders how you’ll react to seeing him again. Perhaps his insistence to find the truth is also stemmed from his disbelief that you can look at him with such dejection. Where was the smile he found beautiful?

He doesn’t believe in coincidences, so this moment can’t happen if it isn’t for his frolicking attitude. He doesn’t regret it, but it does cause a small twang in his chest knowing he’s hurt you.

“I can’t change who I am,” he says.

“I know. I’m not asking you too. I don’t know what I’m asking, honestly. After this we can ignore each other and I’ll never visit the city again.” You look at him to search for some kind of confirmation or rebuttal. 

“Do you really want that?” he asks instead, and perhaps you see your reflection through his green eyes as you widen yours in gentle surprise, like facing a revelation. “You can do what you want with me. I’m not going anywhere.”

You take a step closer. He doesn’t budge, letting your breath hit his skin. A second later, you declare like a criminal: “I missed you.”

You hold his face and press your lips against his.

Heizou does not believe in coincidences. A ripple has to be caused by something. Humans have to be moved by something. He has fallen under scrutiny for this view, but there is no moment greater than this that proves his point. 

It is not a coincidence your lips mould his.

It is not a coincidence he likes you, and it’s not a coincidence you like him.

#heizou x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin x you #genshin x y/n #genshin impact x you #genshin impact x y/n #genshin reader insert #reader insert #x reader #heizou x you #heizou x y/n #shikanoin heizou x reader #slo.w #i played thru his hangout briefly to write this and i think i fell in love with this dude all over again #which further fuelled my desire to finish this bc the drought is so real #alrdy suffering with t.homa drought i can’t stand 2 droughts so i had to write something lmao #ok NOW i'm going to actually dip for real #see you guys in may :3

[thomine]

HIATUS;

TILL MAY 2024. i’ll still be writing (for angstpril + my wips) and working on slo’s dynamic galore. i will also not be as active on discord.

#slocrastinating #if i had to describe my mental health with one word it would be unstable #i might not be as active on discord as well #i don't know how to word it but i just need a break from as many things as possible #and i think i need to face life proper but tumblr has been too distracting & unhelpful in many ways haha #i need to... list down my goals and everything. i need to... re-examine my life haha

[thomine]

the 10 year bet | thoma

RELATIONSHP | thoma / reader

TAGS | general audiences, unrequited love, angst, fights & quarrels, unresolved tension, canon universe (probably far into the future...), not proofread

SUMMARY | after 10 years since he left his hometown, thoma reaches out to you. he's coming home.

WORD COUNT | 1.9k words

INFO | angstpril 2024, day 1 (homesick) | notes

The wind sings only in Mondstadt, and as Thoma steps through the large stone entrance, the wind faintly greets him with a lullaby from 10 years ago. It was a song you hummed when you rested your head on his shoulder after a long day of fun. It is a tune he sings to himself when he feels lonely in a foreign land. It is what he remembers of home.

Citizens of the nation of freedom walk slowly, as if basking in the sun instead of focusing on getting from point A to point B. Thoma never had an issue with their leisure pace 10 years ago. However, as he sets his eyes on the silhouette of the fountain in the middle of the square, legs stretching across uneven cobbled pathways, eyes hunting for gaps to weave through human traffic, annoyance nibbles his thoughts. He’s careful not to step on anyone’s toes or disrupt their route, and the constant calculation makes him restless.

He downs his irk with reason. This is the day he had been yearning for years. Every cold, electrifying kiss from the gales of Inazuma was like a punch in the gut—a reminder his skin was nurtured in gentler atmospheres. The night before, he could hardly sleep, muscles contracted with anticipation.

But today is not just the day he goes home. As he leans against the fountain, he is unsure if he’ll recognise you when you arrive. Many things can change in 10 years.

You were his best friend. 

You were his close confidant. 

You were the last to know of his departure as he left when you went on vacation. 

You would have talked him out of going after his father with all he had—a small wooden rented boat and crates of dandelion wine. Maybe you would have helped him raise funds for a proper journey, or you might have argued with him to stay behind. Truth to be told, as much as he knew you, he could never predict your reactions when it came to him. Once, you ordered his usual instead of yours at Hunter’s Share. Another, you flared when he suggested you take an opportunity in another nation. 

He thought he would never find you again, especially when his letter to your old address returned with the name of someone else. Thankfully, the old lady who stayed at your past residence knew your new address, and to Thoma’s relief, you replied.

You will be free to meet him at the fountain on the first day he visits Mondstadt. You cannot guarantee the time you’ll arrive, but you’ll be there.

Thoma waits. 

The sound of water splashing behind him is off. It’s as if the concentration of the water changed, making it louder, harsher to his ears—which is strange as he’s heard rougher sounds from larger waterfalls. The marble ledge he’s leaning on isn’t quite as smooth as he remembered either.

Thankfully, his thoughts are distracted by a shadow. He looks up.

You are here.

“Kept you waiting, didn’t I?” 

Thoma tries his best to control the elation running across his features.

“It wasn’t that long,” he replies, although he’s glad you appeared as soon as you did. He didn’t want to admit it, but he felt like he was playing monkey in the middle while observing everyone that walked by, forced to catch whatever they were throwing to each other with shared understanding. “It’s good to see you again. I brought you a gift from Inazuma, and I hope you like it.”

“A gift? It’s not my birthday.”

Before he can fish out the charm from his pocket, your serious tone feels like a slap on his hand. Was a reunion not a reason to give gifts?

“I’m just playing with you.” You broaden your smile. Maybe it’s 10 years in the works, but Thoma is uncertain if you’re lying or not. Still, he hands you the charm which you accept without complaint. It’s stuffed into your pocket before you even lay your eyes on it. “I’ve heard so many things about Inazuma, like how they have flowers that glow in the dark and foxes that roam freely. You wrote in your letter that you lived near a magical forest, right? How magical is it?”

“In the forest dwells small creatures called bake-danuki who are a type of tanuki. They’re dark brown with short snouts. Big eyes and round ears on the top of its head. Sometimes you’ll be chasing one and it’ll disappear only for you to realize they’ve turned into an object. I think you’ll like them.”

“They do sound interesting.”

It didn’t cross his mind that your interests were like his. Perhaps you would have spared the lucky charm some attention if it was shaped after a bake-danuki. But he digresses.

“Inazuma is a beautiful nation, and their history is rich with stories of mythical beasts, like the youkai. You’re right that you’ll see foxes sometimes, but you shouldn’t pet them. They’re still wild animals.”

You listen, slow nodding periodically.

“But enough about me. You wrote in your letter you’re doing fine.” Thoma says.

You shrug, then enter deep thought for a second.

“Where do you stay in Inazuma?” you ask. Thoma almost laughs. With how your face scrunched and twisted with contemplation, he believed you would ask a question he can’t answer.

“I currently reside at the Kamisato Estate. They’re a clan that forms the Yashiro Commission, one of the three ruling commissions in Inazuma. Would you like to visit—”

“Wow, you made your way up in a foreign land. That’s good to hear.” Teasingly—as you did years ago—you slap his shoulder, except the strength you gained also reminds Thoma things are not the same. “But of course you’ll be fine. You’re Thoma.”

“Um,” he starts, unsure how to react. This is bad. You’re angry. Fortunately—or unfortunately—he knows why. A good meal might set the mood to talk about what happened 10 years ago. “It’s been a while since I tried Mondstadt cuisine. Should we eat something at Good Hunter?”

You tilt your head in consideration. “I am peckish.” Yet you don’t move until Thoma does, which gives him the luxury of choosing a table nested far from the public. 

“Are you going to order the usual?” you ask. “If you are then I can just order our dishes from Sara now.”

Thoma nods, using the moment alone to prepare himself. He’s been through worse in Inazuma trying to gain the trust and respect of the locals. He can do this…

You sit down opposite him, face blank.

He takes a deep breath. He calls your name to grab your attention, and when he meets your eyes, he opens his mouth.

“About what happened 10 years ago… you’re mad, aren’t you?” When your expression stiffens, he hangs his head low like a prisoner waiting for the next whip. “I’m sorry. If you have any questions, I will answer honestly.”

He picked a table far from the public eye for privacy since he will be addressing a touchy subject. It is a calmer atmosphere, far from the bustle of the city, but its quietness makes the click of your tongue reverberate in his ears.

“You’re making this difficult…” you mumble. “You know you had every right to leave the nation,” you start, eyes tracing the patterns of the table as a hand of yours tightens your collar in distress. “I’m not mad at you for that. I can’t be.”

A dreadful second of silence joins the conversation.

“How… did you hear of my departure?”

“You’re only asking this now?” You lift yourself off your seat and grit your teeth. Thoma raises both his hands as protection. The other time he has seen you this mad was when he wanted you to take up a scholarship in Sumeru. You were adamant on staying in Mondstadt and didn’t talk to him for a few days before apologising and announcing your decision was final.

You close your eyes and after a second of gaining composure, you sit back down. “I learned you were gone when I knocked on your door the day after I returned. No one replied. Your neighbours said you left with wine. It was only when I investigated in Dorman Port, I learnt you left on a boat to Inazuma.”

“I couldn’t tell anyone. I’m sorry.”

Word travels fast in Mondstadt. People loosen their lips when they drink, and that’s what most citizens do at night to unwind. A single whisper can be milled into a believable legend.

Thoma clasps his hands together under the table. The wind seems to respond to his silent plea with a breeze to cool his warming body.

“What would you have done if I told you my plan?” He continues.

“Does that matter now?”

He expected your words to burst him apart, but it’s you that deflates, a hand supporting your face as if you lost your backbone.

“If I were you, I would do the same. I’ll go after my father too… but I thought… I thought I was enough for you.” You’re lost and tired. For a second, you remind him of when he found himself stranded on Inazuma’s beach. In a whisper, you confess. “I loved you, that’s why it hurts. I thought you felt the same.”

Thoma swallows, and it feels like vinegar sliding down his throat. His memories of the day he left his city is a living nightmare. Somewhere deep down he knew how dangerous his journey was. He felt it in the way the winds sang loudly in his ears, a warning he might not make it back alive. He knew of your feelings, didn’t he? That’s why he didn’t want you to know he’ll embark on such a dangerous journey. He couldn’t face the hurt his actions will cause you, and he made a bet with himself that he could 10 years later.

“But I am angry at something I can be angry with.” The tears that glisten in your eyes shine like a blade as you look him down with furrowed brows. “You could have written to me, said something throughout all those years, yet you kept me up all night, worrying for no reason.”

The food arrives, and you’re quick to duck your head as you fake an excuse to touch your eyes in front of Sara. She probably heard the whole thing, hence why she’s forcing a smile and her “your meal is here!” comes out strained. As swiftly as she arrived, she sprints back to the counter. You ordered your regular meal this time.

He tries to say your name but it doesn’t come out right. It’s on his second attempt that it’s clear enough for you to abide his wishes and look at him again.

“I’m sorry,” he says, using his entire chest to turn his guilt into sincerity. It seems like he lost his own game.

You take a bite of your meal. 

“Anyways,” and as you take another bite, you seem to be back to the self that greeted him at the waterfall. Distant and dull. Untouchable and unreachable. “Don’t expect much from this meeting. I only wrote back so I could give you a tour of home. Once we’re done…”

Home.

Thoma takes a bite of his meal. He can’t remember if it’s supposed to taste like that.

Home.

Home.

The word rings like an alarm.

Home.

Home.

Home.

He stares at the sky. It’s a bright, dazzling blue. A blue so blinding he must look down. Was the sky ever so hostile? Was it ever so deep in colour?

Home.

Home.

Home.

Home.

Home is where his heart belongs, and his home was 10 years ago.

#genshin x reader #thoma x reader #angstpril2024 #to the person in charge of rb-ing... please do not rb my work. just know i am participating :3 #genshin impact x you #genshin impact x reader #genshin reader insert #genshin impact x y/n #genshin x y/n #genshin x you #thoma x y/n #thoma x you #x reader #reader insert #anyways. how exciting. i have the characters planned :> #tbh this is fairly OOC a bit but i'm too tired to think and care HAHAH #slo.w

[thomine]

ready, set, aim | venti

RELATIONSHIP | venti / reader

TAGS | general audiences, love confessions, alcohol (but no one gets drunk), kissing scene, nonlinear narrative (italics are used to represent past events), requested by anonymous, reposted (accidentally deleted og)

SUMMARY | venti says confessing is simple, as easy as 1 2 3. you just need to ready, aim, fire.

WORD COUNT | 1.8k words

INFO | beta'ed by mimikyu + ekolu | ao3 | more

“Confessing to your crush is just like shooting an arrow,” Venti says after swallowing a mouthful of wine. It’s the second year you sought his help in exchange for a few drinks. However, since you’re the only student for his love classes this Windblume, he suggested rendezvousing at Angel’s Share in the evening. You were going to take the tab but he said this was just a session of two friends catching up, and he earned a quick buck from performing so he could afford to pay the bill.

As typical of him, he draws an imaginary bowstring, aims, and fires at you, winking to top off the act.

Your heart is shot—it’s not the first time Venti hits bullseye either. He’s chipped your walls with his arrows—unknowingly or not. From a muted life, you think you hear the birth of a melody in your chest. 

Badump.

Badump.

It only plays for him.

“But I don’t know how to shoot an arrow,” you mutter, playing with your frail and smooth hands under the table. They’ve never held a weapon. Years living on the sidelines meant you’ve done nothing.

Barely had a friend, never stayed past midnight, and you’ve never fallen in love. It was too dangerous, too exciting, too anything.

The first time you sang was when Venti invited you from the crowd in front of the fountain. Your performance was horrible, but his vocals miraculously blended with yours, soothed the crowd and salvaged their mora.

You’ve sought him ever since. Stepping out of your comfort zones never felt unfamiliar with him.

“I’m not saying it literally, silly,” Venti jokes as he tips his head back to finish his wine while yours remains untouched. Alcohol might not be what you need when he causes your world to spin, yet the red liquid gleams as he pours himself another glass, catching your curiosity. “Heard of the phrase ‘ready, aim, fire’? Confessing follows these simple steps.”

A laugh slips from your lips. Not only is his analogy cute, it’s funny he claims they’re simple. To his credit, he is a marksman as he is a bard. These things come easier to him than they do to you.

“You never mentioned these steps in your class last year,” you note, swirling the liquid in your glass, observing its deep translucent red that shifts to purple under different angles. It’s like Venti’s eyes that appear blue against the bright sky when he performs, but in seclusion or moonlight, it glows green.

Right now… it’s green. Undoubtedly. A green that reminds you of spring; of new beginnings.

“It’s a love poem writing class, not a love confession class,” Venti quips. “I would have charged double if that was the case. Speaking of lessons… didn’t I grade your poem you submitted last year? We can start with that.”

You blink.

He smirks as he leans forward. Crap. He’s caught you staring.

Flustered, you grab your glass of wine and gulp it down. Your throat burns. How does Venti appreciate its texture? It does give an excuse for the heat accumulating in your body though, you’d give it that.

“It wasn’t a proper love poem…” Carefully, you set your empty glass down. Venti merrily pours more for you. “I was just practising how to use parallels and metaphors.”

“It was a finely written poem. Maybe you should teach me how to write once in a while, hm?”

“No, no…” you shake your head and swallow the portion he poured—he refills it seconds later. “If I was as good as you, I wouldn’t need to ask for help… again.”

There’s a pause.

“I didn’t know you had trouble writing a poem. You only seemed anxious about delivering it,” Venti says.

You nod. Your hand instinctively reaches for your glass without thought. 

“Well, I can’t do both.”

The burning sensation hogs your thoughts from meandering to anything more depressing. Just one more swing of your glass to your lips—your grip tightens, but the glass remains on the table.

“...My poem didn’t feel good enough,” you admit with a sigh. “This is my first time being honest with how I feel.” You press your palm against your forehead. “Plus, I don’t know if he’ll like it. He’s…”

You.

The bard who all of Mondstadt praises. He’s able to command words capable of wrapping people’s eyes with a veil of hope. He’s able to construct tunes that touch someone to the point of tears. Your words, in comparison, will not make a dent to be remembered even if your feelings behind them changed your whole world.

Venti chuckles, tapping on the wooden table. You straighten your back.

“The essence of a poem is the emotions,” he states, voice firm. “Prose is merely wrapping paper. It’s the gift that matters.”

“What if…” you bite your lower lip. “What if the gift isn’t what he wants to receive?” you whisper as if out of breath.

The bar is loud. Hooligans roar and boast of their achievements as laughter bursts from every corner. There’s clanging, banging, and cheering. You barely heard yourself over the wall of noise, which is why you’re surprised Venti reaches for your shaking hands—with a hold so tender—and fosters a smile.

“The only way to know if you’ll hit bullseye is to try.”

He lets go, curious in the wine he barely touched while you’ve at least emptied your’s twice. Embarrassingly, you’re the reason the bottle only has a few sips remaining.

“Are we ready?” Venti asks, practically sparkling. His glass has been emptied and you expected him to drink the bottle clean, but he holds his gaze on you. His smile is dangerously sweet.

“F—for what?” you say.

He gets up from his seat and extends his hand.

“We’re learning how to aim an arrow straight to the heart!”

Ready.

Venti stands at the plaza, strumming his lyre to the crowd of kids. With the setting sun as his backdrop—dashes of pink, purple, and orange—the stage is spectacular. You’re behind the pillar, occasionally peeking past its structure to catch glimpses of the performer who has captivated his audience. Your grip on your letter tightens.

“When it comes to a confession, you have to catch them at the right time,” Venti instructs as he walks along the night streets of Mondstadt. His shoulders bump into yours whenever you sway, the result of alcohol sloshing inside your stomach.

“And what do you mean by ‘the right time’?”

“When your heart is ready.”

“How will I know?”

“You’re asking me?”

“I’m serious, Venti.”

“Pray tell, why do you seek the answer so earnestly?”

“If I don’t, it’ll haunt me.”

“I think you already have your answer.”

Today is the day.

Aim.

The music fades. An applause follows shortly, mixed with high-pitched cheers. You stroke the letter, anxious. When a kid shouts for an encore, you’re unclear if that’s a blessing to have seconds more to think this through or a curse to stretch the anticipation thin.

“Is there a manual? Do I need to have nice scenery?”

“I quite like when the sun is setting,” he says. 

You let out a soft gasp. “You do? Are confessions nicer at twilight?”

Venti shrugs. “The liminal space between day and night—romantic, don’t you think? But what’s of greater importance is to have you and the person fully present.”

He stops walking to turn and graces you with his ever-changing coloured eyes.

A blurry figure passes. It’s a mother dragging her child away from the plaza. He whines, using his whole body to resist his mother’s pull, but his mum persists. 

Venti should be smelling the surrounding flowers or counting his cash—most importantly, he’ll be alone. If you’re not quick, you’ll miss this moment.

You set your sight on the banks of the statue of Barbatos. 

It’s empty.

“Greetings,” a voice says. 

You bump into the pillar and groan in pain. The person grabs your shoulders, preventing you from stumbling backwards.

You turn and are caught in blue eyes that shine like stars against the darkening sky.

“Venti! You gave me a fright!”

“Sorry,” he giggles before checking you for wounds. His touches leave you in a trance, and a gentle gale strokes your face, its comfort like a hammer crashing the pile of worries you had. The rising moon spotlights him. Maybe it is the trick of moonlight, but the ends of his teal braids glimmer. 

“What’s this?” Venti asks. “Is that a letter?”

You place your hands behind your back, pressing yourself against the pillar.

“Nothing,” you utter.

He places his hands on his hips, unconvinced, and questions again, “Then why are you hiding it?”

“It’s not important.”

He raises an eyebrow, a playful grin stretches across his face. “Not of importance? More reason for me to take a look, don’t you think?”

“Well…” You bite the insides of your cheeks. This was not the plan. You want to burn this letter and bury its ashes so as not a single speck gets found—

“I’m just playing,” he laughs. Your chest lightens, relief the letter isn’t a point of focus anymore. However, edges of his lips pull up, mischief in his eyes. You swallow. “The real question is why are you hiding behind the pillar?”

“I’m not hiding!”

“Then why not join the crowd when I perform? I was heartbroken to see my number 1 fan being so shy… unless… you wanted me all to yourself?”

Your cheeks burn.

“I knew this wouldn’t work.” You stare at the ground, lifting yourself to your toes, preparing to sprint. “I’m sorry, I should—”

Venti grounds you by pressing your shoulders.

“Calm down. I have no clue what’s going on.”

It’s your turn to be in disbelief. 

“Really,” he pats you and that soft breeze returns. “So… why are you behind this pillar?”

A shiver runs down your spine. It’s not from the wind or the stone pillar. It’s from the way his eyes glint, like a pirate towards his treasure. 

You bite your lips and swallow.

“And when that person gives his full attention…” Venti comments, his sentence hanging in the air.

There is only one thing left, and you both know what it is.

Fire.

“I like you.”

After sleepless nights, you found a suitable rhyme. The poem in your hands encapsulated everything you wanted to say unwillingly compressed into 5 stanzas, stitched and glued with emotions, yet nothing could beat these simple words.

(Simple. It rings in your head according to the way Venti said it at the bar.)

You think you see the night sky twinkling in his irises.

His smile grows into a smirk as he leans forward. He tilts his head, and as you stare into the window to his soul, you can’t deny the way his gaze falls to your lips.

Your heart thumps widely—badump, badump, badump, badump.

There it is. The tune your body learnt to hum whenever you’re within his influence. It reaches a crescendo when you close the gap between you and him. Your heart plays a melody you never want to end.

When he pulls away, he whispers into your ear.

“Bullseye.”

#venti x reader #genshin x reader #x reader #reader insert #genshin impact x you #genshin reader insert #genshin impact x y/n #genshin impact x reader #genshin x y/n #genshin x you #venti x you #venti x y/n #slo.w

[thomine]

at least it's something | thoma

RELATIONSHIP | thoma x reader

TAGS | teen and up audience, mental health, reader is not vegetarian or vegan, reader serves the kamisato estate, thoma feeds reader (lol), food/eating, npc oc mentioned (minor role), thoma has a small fanclub ig, not proofread

SUMMARY | after a period of living on numbness and melancholy, food just doesn't taste the same. perhaps, someone can help with that.

WORD COUNT | 1.6k words

INFO | more

Your stomach growls and rumbles as you sit quietly at the now empty dining hall of the Kamisato Estate. Lunch was two hours ago, but your soup, plate of poultry with eggs on the side and bowl of rice remain untouched. They look lifeless; pale and grey. You grab onto your utensils, tired of sitting still, and take a bite of each item in front of you. The chicken is still rich in flavour. As you drag the bowl of soup to your mouth, its fragrance hits your nose. The egg, albeit cold, is soft, teeth ripping through its layers like a knife.

The chefs at the Kamisato Estate have cooked a timelessly delicious meal, yet these bursting senses do not reach your brain, and you sigh. Instead of a meal to chow down in delirious gratitude, before you is a reminder of your worse fear.

You are slowly loosing control of the one thing you can control: yourself.

You thought of giving the chefs your unwanted portion, but they’re busy preparing dinner, and seeing their delicious meals unappreciated would discourage them, sprinkling a tad of bitterness into everyone’s food. The last thing you want is your symptoms to spread, so you force yourself to take another bite, except the food runs down your throat wrong in your haste. You never thought it is possible to harbour negative feelings towards a dead animal, its cooked babies, and flavoured soup, but you surprise yourself again.

“There you are!” a voice calls from the entrance of the hall. Thoma walks to your side, taking a spot in the empty seat to your left. “The seniors said they last saw you here. I’m glad I found you.” His eyes glean over your full plates, and his smile weakens with a tinge of sadness. You slink into your chair, guilty, and attempt another bite to cover your struggle with eating.

“You don’t have to put a front for me,” Thoma chides gently, although his unwavering green eyes also encourage you to finish the task you assigned to yourself. When you chew and eventually swallow, his expression softens. “How are you feeling?”

“Horrible,” you confess like a sinner. “Mostly because I want to feel fine, but I don’t, and that only makes it worse.” You place your utensils down.

Lunch was your favourite time of the day, but now you purposefully occupy yourself with menial tasks so you can enter the hall late. It doesn’t help that for the past few days, you were lethargic and unproductive, sleeping late and waking up later, having your colleagues with growing concerns cover your tasks for the day.

Knowing they willingly took it upon themselves to load their shoulders with your weight makes your stomach heavy, but no matter how much you try to lift your head and look at your work with intrepid enthusiasm as you did before, you can’t will that part of you to appear. Something killed it, and the blood splatters are everywhere—from your untouched meals to your desire to stay in bed all day, and the iron taste in your mouth when you hold back your tears at night.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me," you mumble, ashamed.

Thoma doesn't give you a window to observe his reaction. He stands and stretches.

“I was looking for you to have someone do stretching with. It gets boring doing it alone.” He holds out his hand to you. “Want to do it with me? It’ll be something simple, not too taxing.”

As you’re about to accept his offer, your stomach rumbles in defiance. It softly echoes in the hall, and the missing warmth of your food bursts on your face. “Sorry,” you say out of instinct.

Throwing his head back, Thoma laughs. He sits back down and properly examines your half-bitten food.

“Stretching can wait. Let’s get your stomach filled with something first, and I’ll eat whatever you can’t finish.”

“Are you sure?” you ask, unsure why you did. It’s not like sharing food is uncommon among the workers in the estate. “It’s cold. Still delicious, I guess, but it’s not as nice to eat when it’s warm. And, thinking about it, we shouldn’t be stretching immediately after a meal, so you should go without me.”

“Then we don’t have to do stretching. Let’s do something else.”

“Oh no, you shouldn’t change your schedule because of me. I can help you find someone else to do stretches with. It's really important and you shouldn’t skip them.”

“If it's so important, when was the last time you stretched?” He leans his head into his palm propped by its elbow on the tablet, the tilt of his head giving his smile the illusion of a smirk.

You can’t reply. Maintaining the estate is your utmost priority. You have no memory of loitering the courtyards, enjoying the setting sun while bending and twisting your body in a torturously relaxing activity. All you remember is filling every inch of time with a metre of responsibilities.

“Then,” you say a minute after your silent answer, “can you eat my lunch? I don’t think I’m hungry.” You push your plates and utensils towards him. Shocked or confused or both, he looks at it then looks at you. His smile blends mischief and genuinity, casting a mild giddy spell on you.

“Do you want me to feed you?”

“No?” you sputter. The fact your reply sounds like a question than a statement drags embarrassment from the depths of your soul to your face as heat, and it’s the most you’ve felt other than dread and fear the whole week. “Why would you—What if someone walks into the hall? There’ll be so many unwanted rumours.”

You want to swat at his arm but you’re paralyzed with the situations your brain conjures. If the seniors saw this, they will undoubtedly rebuke you for your childishness. They may even lecture you on your immaturity of not segregating professional and interpersonal time—a total misunderstanding!

Thoma chuckles.

“The rumours are the least of my concerns.” He picks up a spoon and scoops a small portion of rice. “Say ‘ah’, or else I’ll have to play windglider.”

“I’m not a kid!” you resist, this time swatting him with the sudden burst of energy you’ve acquired in your daze of doom dreaming. You aren't going to let your colleagues see you like this when you’re already at your all time low. They were generous to keep their heads low and not criticise your personal failings at work. To catch you playing around with the housekeeper? None of them would be pleased, especially those that might be drawn by his charm because he is very charming. “I thought you’ll eat my leftovers?”

“The remaining after you’ve eaten a bit more,” he corrected, and on cue, a low growl from your stomach squeezes its way into the ambience. “Your stomach obviously doesn’t think it’s full.”

You’re a walking heated pan with how hot your body feels, evaporating every drop of sadness you permitted to flood you the past days, and your defences weaken in embarrassment because when Thoma brings the spoon close to your mouth, you take a bite.

“I’m never going to get over this,” you lament, covering your face with your hands. “I should have just endured the scoldings of the chefs.”

“I heard Chef Tang is not in a good mood today. Something about salt being wasted after an improper delivery.”

“Chef Tang will end up screaming his head off and I’ll be quivering even worse than a bird in its last moments before its cultivator, but at least I don’t often bump into him. Maybe in my effort to avoid him I’ll always finish my meals on time so I never have to personally hand him my dishes for washing.”

“I hope you don’t avoid me after this,” Thoma says, and it’s the softest he’s been since the start. “But, you also wouldn’t want to be facing Chef Tang’s wrath when he’s out of salt. I’m saving you from the worst that can happen.” Thoma holds a spoon with a larger mix of rice, egg and small chunks of meat that he crafted while you ranted. He’s grinning uncontrollably, as if he won the lottery to make fun of you. “Say ‘ah’ again?”

You reluctantly open your mouth.

“Okay, I can feed myself now,” you say, reaching for the spoon. Thoma teasingly doesn’t let go, but on your second tug, he gives it to you properly. 

“And not only that, you’ve got some liveliness to your face now. That wasn’t so bad, was it?” he notes.

You stare at the food, its saturation slowly draining back. 

Seeing about a third of your food disappear is slightly encouraging, and it is refreshing to feel something other than sharp emptiness. You notice your hands shake as you hold back a sliver of laughter combined with unreleased anguish. Your heart thumps erratically in your chest, demanding to be acknowledged. You can sense the way your chest expands and collides with each breath.

Tears prick the corner of your eyes, and you live through every second your vision goes blurry as well as the way your nose clogs up with snot.

“At least it’s something,” you meekly reply, overwhelmed by these small sensory experiences.

“At least it’s something,” Thoma echoes, watching patiently as you take periodic bites of your lunch while wiping your tears with your free hand. He places his on your head and rustles your hair, grip gentle and reassuring. “That’s all that matters, isn’t it?"

#genshin x reader #thoma x reader #genshin x y/n #genshin impact x you #genshin reader insert #genshin impact x y/n #genshin impact x reader #reader insert #x reader #thoma x you #thoma x y/n #ok so like. i would never let anyone baby feed me. Ever. my pride is too big for that #so kudos to reader for letting down their pride bc i could never #they did it for the story. pls make their sacrifice not in vain </3 #either way yeah. i feel much better having written this. small steps #slo.w #but like… update… it’s been 4 hours and i haven’t finished my lunch #this is the first time i feel like this

[thomine]

bro no way i only have 2 thoma works on this blog

#slocrastinating #sadly i’m writing for h.eizou & a g.orou fic so i’ve been preoccupied with that #but also what the heckkkk. too many wips #ngl. i was 👌close to writing / starting a new t.homa wip but then i figured i’ll give the idea to h.eizou #just vibes better w/ him lmao #ok but i have mistletoe on ao3 but also that is very old i dont wanna lk at it lmaoo #q ed

[thomine]

This is my five billionth time trying to come up with something, so let’s go. Thank you! <3

I’d consider myself an ambivert that primarily prefers being alone to indulge myself in my hobbies, but also hates being lonely. While I wouldn’t consider myself sociable, I’m a friendly person. I can easily chat with most people. I love learning about people and hearing what they like to talk about. But my natural inclination is to cling to my alone time.

I am a very analytical person at heart. I like studying things to know why and how they work. This applies very much so to people. Because of this, I tend to be known as a smart person. At work, I am fast and accurate. I understand how my duties and others work in the big picture. I’m quick to notice when things are wrong and can point out where the error lies. I have a reputation for being a quick and reliable helper.

I’m generally known as a logical person. While I do have a temperament, I’m not seen as emotional. I make decisions with a level head. I’m not weak either. I love debates and arguments. I enjoy raising my voice. I do not hesitate to stand my ground if need be. If I get mad at someone, it’s typically because they’re contradicting themselves or saying something that makes no sense.

That being said, I’m lacking in many ways too. I’ve been told many times that I am a mean person. Apparently my way of speaking makes some feel like they’re being humiliated or mocked. I lack sympathy. I’m too outspoken. I serve primarily my own motives, not others. I’m stubborn, a know-it-all, selfish, etc etc etc.

My biggest insecurity is being misunderstood. I have a hard time verbalizing my feelings/opinions and conveying my intent which has gotten me in a lot of trouble in the past. That being said, what bothers me isn’t being seen as a good and kind person, but simply as being perceived inaccurately. I want to be understood as I am without changing myself to be more palatable to others. I may be selfish and unsympathetic, but I’m more than that.

So who would you pair me with? 👀 @paimonial-rage

this is a gift.

if you would like one of your own, please read my post here that lists what i'm willing to do and what to expect for a non-gift.

i wanted to pair you up with zhongli, ngl. but anyways, picture this:

you're in a debate with someone, temper agitated and argument points hot enough to dissolve your opponent's ego in the akademiya building. such a sight is common in the school, so you don't bother with the stares and looks knowing they'll treat you like background noise eventually. you raise your voice, disturbing those in the vicinity, but your adversary is literally covering their ears to combat your logical brilliance. it isn't long till they declare a stalemate. when you and your opposer part ways, you want to go home quickly but someone taps you on your shoulder...

it's tighnari. maybe you briefly recognize him considering his reputation in the academia and among the forest watchers. maybe you don't, but that doesn't bother him. reputation is just the backdrop of a person, not the person itself.

although... tighnari has heard of you. as you said, you're known as an analytical person, someone smart. he has a penchant for such people, and bonus if they can speak their minds. you're efficient, quick, reliable, which is everything tighnari wished he had in his colleagues. in some sense, perhaps he already has a small admiration for what he heard about you, but he's wary to place labels on these feelings. he doesn't know if you have a favorite color. he doesn't know if you like mushrooms. small steps, it's what he believes in, so when he sees the chance to approach you, he takes it without hesitation.

your debate intrigues him, and he has a few questions. he doesn’t mind talking to you there and then, but he has something to rush for in a few minutes. exchanging addresses to mail each other letters is the ideal thing to do.

you're not a sociable person, but that's not an issue for him. he's alright with initiating. anyways, he approached you, didn't he? after you exchange details, don't be surprised if you receive a letter here and there. at first, it's to expand on your argument, but casual topics are gradually discussed. and conversation, i believe, will flow smoothly with how you're open to hearing him ramble about his interest in plants and the ecosystems of the forest. it will be comfortable, and exciting in some ways, to have him write to you about the contraptions they use at the forest. from traps to capture berserk animals to their machinery of conveniences.

perhaps at some point in your brewing relationship, he invites you to the forest ranger's headquarters. tighnari's hands are shakier than expected, temperament more fragile than ice in the summer. he warns his colleagues with an infamous streak of trouble to not do anything silly, but of course something has to happen. a forest ranger carelessly discarded a trap they used in an old mission, causing the injuries of a wandering adventurer.

he's livid, marching silently towards the crime scene. he insisted that you stay at headquarters and wait for him, but somehow you find yourself tagging along. the guilty forest ranger is doing his best to deal with his mistakes, but his lack of knowledge on medicine makes it worse, causing tighnari's rage to grow.

it's not long till he raises his voice, eyes aimed at one person, tongue reprimanding left, right, front, center. the forest ranger shivers as if stripped naked in winter, and tighnari quickly deals with the adventurer's injuries.

he doesn't bring it up on the walk back or when he accompanies you out of the forest after a long day of planned (and unplanned) activities. instead, it's you. it's a levelheaded conversation, of tighnari's reaction, of the forest ranger's reactions, and ends with practical suggestions on how such situations can be minimized. he had people talk with him about his temper. they always say he acts out of line, but you don't, at least, not without understanding his point of view. you can see why he would be angry.

something clicks in him, and such a situation makes him crave your essence more.

hanging out with tighnari isn't tiring. he is a busy man so time is precious to him. he will plan and arrange days to do certain activities he thinks you might be keen on, but he'll also arrange times to do as each wishes, understanding the need to invest and indulge in one's passions. he doesn't need quick responses from his letters, and neither do you. it seems like he's an uptight person with all the planning, but he's actually extremely flexible, as required in the nature of his job.

of course, not everything is sunshine and rainbows. there are times your harsh and straightforward ways of speech has irked tighnari in his times of stress. he does not appreciate having your words slice through his already thinning patience, and arguments can erupt. it doesn't help that both of you are stubborn. but, he does not fault you for the way you speak or the sides you take. in fact, when others call you selfish, he calls you reasonable. the first rule he learned in biology is that fools don't look after their own needs, and this also applies to humans.

eventually, after having thought through thoroughly of each person's position, logic will prevail. consensus and compromises formed, and arguments quelled.

you say your biggest insecurity is being misunderstood. tighnari is not one to quickly place judgement on people. since the very beginning, he is aware that what he hears of someone is not everything. as researcher of plants and organisms, he knows how assumptions suffocate the growth of a plant. one needs to pause, to observe, to notice, which is exactly what he is. he relies on his senses and experience and less on prediction and universal rules. he is someone in tune with his surroundings; always open to be proved wrong. as a researcher, isn't it exciting when you're faced with the truth that you don't know everything? there is no worry of making yourself palatable for him. he appreciates you as you are, and will do the best within his knowledge and means to make sure he understands you as you.

i hope you liked my analysis.... i'm sorry if it's not a structured as what you did for me, or as interesting or accurate (idk??). i found it pretty hard to write without incorporating some sort of scenario or story so i hope that's alright!

#genshin impact x you #genshin reader insert #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact x y/n #ok but abt pairing you with z.hongli it was a joke and then i realized it's ACTUALLY ok. like not too bad of a pair #and at some point i wanted to go with a.lbedo but then at some point i figured this character was a better choice #i have some notes but like i dont know how to explain them at all #ALSO so sorry for the wait. i called myself slo for a reason.... sloth... and slow...... both are me..... orz #this was sent in like the start of the year. this took more than a month omg HAHAH #u know i did joke abt u and a.lhaitham being a good pair but after writing this #i don't think it's bc you make a good pair with a.lhaitham. i think you fit much better with this character #but. but. but. you are literally one of the few selected person i can see a.lhaitham possibly being interested in #and among the smallll list of characters i can see a.lhaitham with you'll be one of the top choices

[thomine]

SLO'S DYNAMIC GALORE!

EVENT . everyone is like a lego piece: despite being of different shapes and sizes, we have commonalities that allow us to connect with others. so the question is... if you want achieve a certain structure, who would be your best choice?

after finishing a gift for my friend (who i did an anon analysis for, and you can receive an anon analysis from @paimonial-rage), i thought it'll be cool to try a different approach.

in this event, you are to send me a description of your personality and one dynamic (see under the cut). i will give you a genshin character that fits the dynamic with you, and if inspired, might propose some tropes. please read more under the cut for terms and formatting of your ask.

dynamics

complementary opposites (you lack something i have; i lack something you have)

surface opposites (we may seem like we're different but upon learning more about the other we are actually pretty similar)

peas in a pod (we understand each other fundamentally. we're not exactly mirrors but i know you as i know myself and vise versa)

(adapted from this post, if you're curious).

terms

i am opening 3 slots, preferably 1 per dynamic. this is because i do not want to overwhelm myself as this is quite new. more slots may open in the future!

friends can freely submit. the 3 slots does not include them.

submission period is from 28 feb to 4 march. i will announce which are the asks i'll be writing for after the submission period.

please give me a month or more to write this as i am swarmed with other responsibilities and work.

asks that do not follow the format will not be entertained. see below.

accepted: @andromeda-nova-writing + @yoiieczwhynot

formatting of your ask

it's simple. please just include a description of yourself, preferably paragraphs long, and your ONE dynamic.

some things that you can include (you don't need to include everything):

your personality (i.e. how you react to certain situations, what are your values)

interests and why you like them

what you think are your strengths / weaknesses

what other people say are your strengths / weaknesses

traits that you aspire to have / who do you want to be?

traits that you currently have / who are you currently?

what not to give:

your sexuality (my reply focuses on dynamics, not romantic pairings)

your physical appearance (keep ur privacy hahaha)

your age or pronouns (does not affect your match at all. save that space for things that matters please)

anything too traumatic (please do not trauma dump)

MBTI / enneagram / horoscope, etc... (i won't use it anyways)

#genshin x reader #genshin impact x y/n #genshin impact x you #genshin reader insert #genshin impact x reader #slocrastinating #maybe i should make some kind of tag for these things but the thing is i never expected myself to even start one #tbh the reason why i am only opening 3 slots is bc i dont trust myself LOL #what if i get so many and then i dont do them LOL #so far from my record i only have the stamina for abt 3 and then i sort of die off #if no one joins that'll be nice i'll just save this idea for next time hahha

[thomine]

─── 𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐏𝐇𝐈𝐈𝐒𝐌'𝐒 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑 𝐂𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐁 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐓

✧ ˚ · . welcome to kay's 2023 writing collab event! this is intended to be small, no pressure community event ( •̀ᴗ•́ )و essentially, the premise is to pick a quote from this post and write a fic revolving around said quote! there are many options, so i hope everyone will find one they'll enjoy integrating into their story (･ω･ﾉﾉﾞ

✧ ˚ · . STATUS [ 10 / 21 ] : open !

✧ ˚ · . guidelines !

01. SFW x reader fics only. 02. no dark content, no NSFW content. 03. no min or max word count. 04. pick only one quote; this means only one submission per writer for this event. i would like everyone to have a fair chance :^) this is subject to change, though! i don't expect all the quotes to be claimed, so maybe later down the road, the submission count will increase. 05. when you post your fic : ♡ provide the source of the quote ( e.g. from path to nowhere, by so and so, etc. ) ♡ mention/tag me so i don't miss anyone's work (•’╻’• ۶)۶ ( @seraphiism ) ♡ link back to this post ♡ tag your fic with #seraphiism'23

✧ ˚ · . how do i join ?

choose a quote & fandom from the lists below, then send me an ask containing: ♡ the quote you want to claim ♡ ( preferably ) the fandom you'll be writing for ( if you’re not sure, still deciding, or decide later that you want to change it, that’s fine! as long as it’s from the fandom list. you don’t have to msg me or anything! ) ♡ the blog name you will be posting your fic from please note there are no duplicates, so quotes are claimed on a first come, first serve basis. if someone else has claimed that quote, i will let you know! i'll respond to the ask and update the quote list with your blog name.

✧ ˚ · . when is the deadline ?

the deadline to post fics will be december 31st! this is a very, very lax deadline. if you don't have enough time, expect to post your fic after the date, or no longer wish to participate, that's completely okay! the point of this event is just to have fun. things happen-- school, work, life events, emergencies, creative block, etc. -- i understand, so please do not feel obligated :^) that being said, if you decide to not participate anymore, send me a message so i can make the quote available again! you are also more than welcome to post the fic before dec 31st!

✧ ˚ · . fandoms ! ( under the cut )

♡ baldur's gate ♡ code vein ♡ dragon age ( all series ) ♡ fire emblem ( all series ) ♡ genshin impact ♡ granblue fantasy ♡ final fantasy ( all series ) ♡ honkai star rail ♡ jujutsu kaisen ♡ obey me ♡ path to nowhere ♡ resident evil ( all series ) ♡ tears of themis ♡ tokyo revengers ( time-skip only ) ♡ touchstarved

✧ ˚ · . quotes !

╭┈ 𝐯𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐨 𝐠𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐬 ✧. ┊ 𝗽𝗮𝘁𝗵 𝘁𝗼 𝗻𝗼𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 ; 𝗽𝘁. 𝗶 01. ' please don't get hurt while i'm not around. ' 02. ' i know it's painful, but don't give up. ' 03. ' let go. this time, it's my turn to protect you. ' 04. ' as long as you need me, i'll always stay by your side. ' 05. ' i want to watch it once more, the sunrise. '

✧. ┊ 𝗽𝗮𝘁𝗵 𝘁𝗼 𝗻𝗼𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 ; 𝗽𝘁. 𝗶𝗶 06. ' when that time comes, i shall willingly be at your mercy and follow you to the ends of the earth. ' 07. ' it must be hard for you to understand, right? that there'd be a selfish, cruel and cold-blooded monster like me in this world. ' 08. ' i know you're suffering now. perhaps nothing i will say will ease your pain. ' 09. ' no, i don't want you to die. i won't allow it. ' 10. ' you're ahead of others in reaching the end that nobody can escape. '

✧. ┊ 𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗵𝗼𝗻𝗼𝗿𝗲𝗱 11. ' i wonder if you remember me as i was. sometimes i think of those days. do you? ' ➺ CLAIMED ( @primoredial-jade ) 12. ' there will come a time when we must part. i only tell you this in the hope to make easier our farewells. ' 13. ' all things end, all things burn to ash, but you, my friend, burn bright. ' 14. ' when you are near, my heart is at peace. ' 15. ' i see inside you. but you're not as twisted as i thought you'd be. '

✧. ┊ 𝗽𝗮𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗹𝗼𝗴𝗶𝗰 16. ' what in the world is going on here? are you trying to flirt with me? ' 17. ' i pity you, human. you're so good, but there's so little of you left. ' 18. ' you've got enough sins on your conscience to suffer until the end of days. ' 19. ' if no one has ever told you about your fate, i will be the first. ' 20. ' compassion might be the most sincere emotion a human being is capable of. '

✧. ┊ 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗵𝗼𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗳𝗮𝘁𝗮 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗴𝗮𝗻𝗮 21. ‘ if you have to face emotions you wanted to keep buried, secrets you wanted to keep hidden away, and pain you wanted to forget, do you think you'll be able to accept them as your own? ’ 22. ' no matter what happens, you mustn't let go of my hand. ' 23. ' i had well beyond my share of happiness. i don't need any more. ' 24. ' i know we'll find each other. i have faith we will. ' 25. ' keep just a little bit of me in a corner of your soul. '

✧. ┊ 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝗰. 𝗴𝗮𝗺𝗲𝘀 26. ' may you find your worth in the waking world. ' ┊  bloodborne 27. ' this may sound strange, but... have i somehow changed? ' ┊ bloodborne 28. ' you can close your eyes. i'll always remain here by your side. ' ┊ persona 29. ' should you ever lose hope, should you be too weak to stand, remember that you are not alone. ' ┊ persona ➺ CLAIMED ( @auraxins ) 30. ' we all make choices, but in the end our choices make us. ' ┊ bioshock

╭┈ 𝐥𝐲𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐬 ✧. ┊ 𝗮𝗴𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗱 31. ' if you can't hold it back, it's okay to cry. you're already more than enough to be loved. ' 32. ' the past is gone, the future is far away. what are you afraid of? ' 33. ' i'm always here, so don't worry too much. ' 34. ' you who sleep for your dreams, it's okay to rest. ' 35. ' forever’s something like a sand castle, you know. it comes crumbling down at the calmest of waves. '

✧. ┊ 𝗳𝗹𝗼𝗿𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 + 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗺𝗮𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗲 36. ' you can’t carry it with you if you want to survive. ' 37. ' i’m not calling you a ghost ; just stop haunting me. ' 38. ' then i heard your heart beating ; you were in the darkness too, so i stayed in the darkness with you. ' ➺ CLAIMED ( @decadentfantasy ) 39. ' you can't choose what stays and what fades away ; and i'd do anything to make you stay. ' ➺ CLAIMED ( @noxtivagus ) 40. ' and the heart is hard to translate, it has a language of its own. '

✧. ┊ 𝗲𝗱𝗲𝗻 41. ' what we had was never enough for us, just echoes and dust. ' 42. ' but please, just hold on to me ; i've slayed these demons, they're old to me. ' 43. ' some say these things are for the best ; how are you so sure? ' 44. ' all you want so far is love, death and some kind of higher high. ' 45. ' i used to wonder what love is, but ever since you've been around, i finally think i have it figured out. ' ➺ CLAIMED ( @teyvattales )

✧. ┊ 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝗰. 𝗹𝘆𝗿𝗶𝗰𝘀 46. ' you taught me the courage of the stars before you left. ' ┊ sleeping at last 47. ' the heaviness that i hold in my heart's been crushing me. ' ┊ sleeping at last 48. ' don't bring tomorrow cause i already know i'll lose you. ' ┊ daughter 49. ' and if you're in love, then you are the lucky one. ' ┊ daughter 50. ' my love, don't look back anymore. ' ┊ rm

╭┈ 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞 / 𝐩𝐨𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐬 ✧. ┊ 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝘆, 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗺𝗼𝗹𝗲, 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝘅, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗵𝗼𝗿𝘀𝗲 51. ' life is difficult, but you are loved. ' 52. ' sometimes i think you believe in me more than i do. ' 53. ' there is more love in this world than you could possibly imagine. ' 54. ' home isn’t always a place, is it? ' 55. ' often the hardest person to forgive is yourself. '

✧. ┊ 𝗼𝗺𝗻𝗶𝘀𝗰𝗶𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿’𝘀 𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄𝗽𝗼𝗶𝗻𝘁 56. ' i shall pray that you may continue to exist somewhere, too. ' 57. ' will i ever get to meet you again? ' 58. ' i couldn't rage when i wanted to rage. i couldn't be sad when i wanted to grieve. ' 59. ' the hurt we inflicted on each other would not be erased. ' 60. ' even if you manage to save the world, you still won't be saved. '

✧. ┊ 𝗽𝗿𝗶𝗱𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗽𝗿𝗲𝗷𝘂𝗱𝗶𝗰𝗲 61. ' you must know, surely you must know, it was all for you. ' 62. ' we are all fools in love. ' 63. ' i am very sorry to have caused you pain. ' 64. ' you must allow me to tell you how ardently i admire and love you. ' 65. ' have a little compassion on my nerves. you tear them to pieces. '

✧. ┊ 𝗺𝗮𝗯𝗲𝗹 66. ' we don’t get what we’re due, or what we’re owed, we only get what we get, and we can crumble and cry about it or we can make do. ' 67. ' if you ever saw good in me, it was only reflected from you. ' 68. ' i am not myself. i don’t think i’ve been my real self for a very long time. ' 69. '  if you don’t come with me now, i can’t protect you. you have to leave it all behind, and i can keep you safe. i promise i will keep you safe. ' 70. ' you’ll remember, then, that i might have saved you, that i loved you enough to try. '

✧. ┊ 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝗰. 𝗹𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 ; 𝗽𝘁. 𝗶 71. ' your soul grows sick with longing for the things it has forbidden to itself. ' ┊ oscar wilde 72. ' the gods have been good to you. but what the gods give, they quickly take away. ' ┊ oscar wilde 73. ' i love you and i missed you and i’m so very sorry. ' ┊ shuly xóchitl cawood 74. ' nothing this intense can ever last. even the brightest stars burn out. ' ┊ gwendolyn macewen 75. ' i will tell you this. there’s no need for you to break. ' ┊ r.m. drake

✧. ┊ 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝗰. 𝗹𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 ; 𝗽𝘁. 𝗶𝗶 76. ' i will share my life with you, for good or evil, until death comes. ' ┊ agatha christie 77. ' in the whole entire world, you are the only person, the only person i love or have ever loved. ' ┊ tony kushner 78. ' i almost do not exist now and i know it ; god knows what lives in me in place of me. ' ┊ fyodor dostoevsky ➺ CLAIMED ( @ex-tenebris ) 79. ' of course we will hurt each other. but this is the very condition of existence. ' ┊ antoine de saint-exupéry 80. ' i love you– i do– but i am afraid of making that love too important. because you’re always going to leave me. we can’t deny it. you’re always going to leave. ' ┊ david levithan

✧. ┊ 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝗰. 𝗹𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 ; 𝗽𝘁. 𝗶𝗶𝗶 81. ' don’t fool yourself into thinking that you are going to have it all. you are not. ' ┊ joyce brothers 82. ' i will love you tonight, and tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow, and still many more, so very many more tomorrows. ' ┊ vladimir nabokov ➺ CLAIMED ( @bloodandthestars ) 83. ' i’m a fool, but i’ll love you dear. ' ┊ bill trader` 84. ' it was nice to have you in my life while i did, good luck with everything that happens after now. ' ┊ iain thomas 85. ' you have broken down my defenses, and i don’t really resent it. ' ┊ vita sackville west ➺ CLAIMED ( @monocaelia )

✧. ┊ 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝗰. 𝗹𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 ; 𝗽𝘁. 𝗶𝘃 86. ' love does not begin and end the way we seem to think it does. ' ┊ james baldwin 87. ' i cannot stop you now. i cannot save you. ' ┊ amal el-mohtar & max gladstone 88. ' i love you. the most three difficult words in the world. but what else can i say? ' ┊ jeanette winterson 89. ' is there something you need? name it. it's yours. if i have it, it's yours. ' ┊ ali hazelwood 90. ' i swear i've been tender ; i've been tough when i needed to be. ' ┊ molly mccully brown

✧. ┊ 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝗰. 𝗹𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 ; 𝗽𝘁. 𝘃 91. ' your words are so softly spoken that no one can hear them except in deep silence. ' ┊ guigo II 92. ' tell me this will never ruin us ; god, tell me, please. ' ┊ michael wasson 93. ‘ which parts of you did you kill so you could be loved? ’ ┊ jody chan 94.' don't leave now. we have almost survived our lives. ' ┊ linda pastan 95. ' my rot is as hungry as me. & when god asks me about love, i always respond with cruelty. ' ┊ yves olade

✧. ┊ 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝗰. 𝗹𝗶𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 ; 𝗽𝘁. 𝘃𝗶 96. ' the truth is simple, you do not die from love. you only wish you did. ' ┊ erica jong 97. ' and i'd choose you; in a hundred lifetimes, in a hundred worlds, in any version of reality, i'd find you and i'd choose you. ' ┊ kierston white 98. ' i'm tired, can't think of a thing, and my sole wish is to lay my head in your lap, feel your hand on my head, and stay that way through all eternity. ' ┊ franz kafka 99. ' still, there is this terrible desire to be loved. still, there is this horror at being left behind. ' ┊ michael cunningham 100. ' i don't care, i love you anyhow. it is too late to turn you out of my heart. part of you lives here. ' ┊ anne sexton

questions? ready to send a message?

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ send one here!

#nap time #i have not forgotten abt this op!!! pls give me more time 🙏🙏 #i wish u all the best hehehe

[thomine]

2023 WRAPPED

writing edition for thomine. questions that summarise your writing journey for the whole year. source of these prompts were lost.

thanks for accompanying me on this journey! onward to more words written, more stories shared, and more atrocious alliteration)

Your yearly word count!

a whooping 31,327 words! this does not count stories posted on my older blog. au august really did wonders to my stats, haha. this word count is only for published works, not including drafts. au august was about 24k, which is about 70% of my yearly word count, lol.

Fave fic you wrote this year?

there is so many reasons why something can be a person's favourite... and this year it is probably READY, AIM, FIRE (venti)! i really like metaphors and abstract themes, so it was fun trying to string two concepts that are seemingly not related into a story! i absolutely loved the prompt and the undertone it brought to the story. i also really like venti, and i had tons of fun writing a little bit of the fic everyday.

Fave fic you read this year?

THE FIVE WISHES YOU FULFILLED TO ME BEFORE I DIED, by (@)tartagliaxx! i love the emotional maturity of this fic and how it handles the topic of death so gracefully. the last chapter was something i did not expect (in a sense, i was fooled), but it was a very pleasant surprise and i love the spin of it. there are many beautiful metaphors as the author talks about the experiences of handling a dying loved one which i loved. impressed with this author's stamina because i cannot write a fic this long, lol.

Fave ship you wrote for?

tighnari and reader in REACHING OUT. i wrote this piece when i received news that my friend was travelling overseas and he had no intention of returning. but, even if he did, his absence would impact the friend group dynamic's a lot--and it did--which made me... grief a lot. i wrote this as a conversation between myself and an alternative point of view symbolic of tighnari. however, after the whole year, i realised that reader and tighnari sort of morphed into their own relationship. they're cute (in my head).

Fave character POV to write!

ohhh reader in TUG OF NURTURE (baizhu). in this fic, reader is turning into a zombie, so i had to think about how that would feel like. what even is a zombie anyway? it was fun. an honourable mention would be reader in FOOLISH LOGIC (tighnari), as they are a robot. the issue is that writing in the 3 statement = 1 conclusion can be a bit boring if dragged for too long.

Fave line you wrote!

There are a few who rush through the storeroom shouting for their young master, but they cannot find him.

from SEARCH IN VAIN (xingqiu)! in this fic, xingqiu's role as the second son of feiyun and xingqiu is thinly separated. that is the context that, i feel, makes this line cool. they are trying to find their young master, but they cannot find him. he is not there. instead, it is xingqiu.

WIP you finally finished!

not necessarily finished... but i am glad i tried writing every day for the month of august! it was really fun. being able to write for 12 days straight was inspiring, and that prompted me to make SLO'S MONTHLY REPORT, a newsletter where i hope to share 1 work every month.

WIP you've yet to finish!

i know i don’t talk about it much but i would really like to rewrite AND expand on FOR YOUR SAKE (chongyun). when i wrote it, i was plagued by the idea to the point i had to publish what i’ve already written to give myself breathing space. i had an idea for a 2/3 part story then, but i just didn’t have the energy or time (or effort to fork out both) for this wip. maybe next year!

Your most read fic this year!

probably… READY, AIM, FIRE (venti)? i am not someone who looks back regularly, and often times notes aren’t an accurate indicator for viewership, but i uploaded it to ao3 and it seems pretty loved there as well.

Your longest fic this year!

SERIOUS SCHEMES AND SINCERE SINS (thoma). it was a whooping 2.8k fic even though i limited myself to 1.5k words MAX. but it is thoma, so i had to. funnily enough, my longest fic for 2022 was also a thoma fic! haha.

Your shortest fic this year!

THROUGH THICK AND THIN (mika). it sits at around 600 words. i wanted it to be a drabble (100 words only), but i couldn't do it. maybe another time!

Fave fic title you used!

THE DUET OF ONE HEART (alhaitham)! this is a small symbolism to the fic. although alhaitham and reader are enemies, because they are on equal grounds to compete they understand each other so well, and their hearts "become one". i think it's a nice title because duet = two people, but it's a duet of one heart—a heart of two people combined. do you see it? XD

Biggest surprise while writing this year!

probably the launch of the steambird’s discord! we’re still a pretty small community, but it has been a blast discussing things and sharing posts with them. we have a writing event due and i look forward to that! also, it’s nice to have people to do writing sprints with.

Fave comment you received this year!

being told that there is an air of domesticity in my fics! i think it’s really endearing if a fic has that domesticity, because it alludes to authenticity and also just the general vibe of the author and reader being friends, and the author is telling their story openly. i’m glad my stories come across that way! i write to connect with people, so i like that it is easy to reach (domestic being associated with homely, comfortable, etc).

Fave fic author to read this year!

@andromeda-nova-writing !! my friend uploaded so many fics this year, including a whole world for vampire!ayato. really proud of her, and i adore her skills in dialogue that really adds a beautiful flow to the fics she writes.

Total fics/chapters uploaded this year!

from the tags i use on this blog (assuming i've tagged things properly), i have a total of 22 fics on thomine. most of them are from au august. i hope to write even more this year! final boss is nanowrimo.

What are you looking forward to next year?

writing more long fics! over the years, i realise my ideas are growing in maturity. they’re no longer ideas that can simply be confined to just 1-2k one-shots. they need space to build itself and grow, so i would like to write longer fics this year. may my fics average to about 3-4k words 🙏 i would need to build a stamina for that, so let’s work on it slowly!

#build a forest #reusing this tag for such things haha. because i hope to do it yearly #blog revamp for 2024?? yes #stay tuned! hahaha #on an unrelated note: i figured out how to integrate ao3 into my archive #this blog is the true archive of everything #ao3 will be for fics i particularly like and am proud of :> #to put less pressure on myself for producing 'masterpieces'

[thomine]

44, 49, 68, 72 ovo

fanfiction writing asks (accepting!)

44. What is your favorite genre to write?

i want to say angst but i don't like angst without its layers, and that would not make it not quite angst anymore? anyways, i like things with high conflict and tension, angst comes close.

49. What fic of yours would you say is the best introduction to you as a writer?

oooh. this is a tough question... i would say ready, aim, fire (venti). it's a writing style edging on what i would consider my ideal writing style. the story has a structure (start, middle, end), and it's all delivered with poetic writing that ties the story to the larger prompt.

68. Are there any fics that influenced you to write the way you do?

no fic in particular, but my experience reading fics has formed rules that shape my writing. for example, i don't like flashback arcs so i try to avoid them in my works. i am not good with keeping up with time/dates when reading, so i tend to write without time in mind.

72. What’s your favorite writing compliment you’ve gotten?

asking to pick a favourite compliment is like asking to pick a favourite child. feels wrong but undoubtedly there will be a favourite child, haha. i think it has to be when someone shares how the fic made them feel. i know there are shortcomings in my execution, but ultimately, i am trying my best because i want my stories to leave an impact. so when people share with me how the fic made them feel, it's the biggest compliment to know my words are alive.

#sloth mail #isekyaaa #thank u for asking!! the questions are so fun HAHHA #tbf i have been straying away from the writing style of that v.enti fic #i have been inspired by script writing and how much subtext there is in dialogue and action #so i've been trying to explore that instead of racking my brain for poetic lines #basically i watched a filler kdrama and noticed how little they actually act?? #most of the time they're just standing and delivering their lines because the camera is showing a close up of their face #ugh idk how to describe it but if my writing was placed on a screen it would look like that and i know narrative writing =/= screen play #but i just want what my characters do to be more significant than just they stand around and say some lines lol idk HAHAH

[thomine]

Fanfiction Writing Asks

Do you daydream a lot before you write, or go for it as soon as the ideas strike?

Where do you get your fic ideas?

Do you share your fic ideas, or do you keep them to yourself?

How do you choose which fics to write?

How many wips do you have?  What fandoms/pairings are they for?

What’s the last line you wrote?

Post a snippet from a wip.

Post an out-of-context spoiler from a wip.

Does this word [chosen by asker] appear in your current wip?

Do you work on multiple wips or stick to one fic at a time?

Do you write scenes in order, or do you jump around?

Do you outline your fics?  If yes, how detailed are your outlines?  How far do you stray from them?

Do you listen to music while you write?  If yes, what have you been listening to recently?

What is your favorite location and position to write in?

What’s your favorite time to write?

Do you write by hand, on your phone, or on your laptop?

Do you have a writing routine?

Do you enjoy research?  Which fic of yours required the most research?

Do you enjoy creating OCs or do you prefer to stick solely to canon characters?

Do you prefer writing AUs or canon fics?

Do you prefer writing chaptered fics or one-shots?

Do you title your fics before, during, or after the writing process?  How do you come up with titles?

Is writing the beginning, middle, or end of the story easiest? Hardest?

How do you choose whose POV to write in?

What’s your favorite part of the writing process (worldbuilding, brainstorming/outlining, writing, editing, etc)?

What’s your least favorite part of the writing process?

What area of writing do you feel strongest in?

What area of writing do you want to improve in?

What’s something about your writing that you’re proud of?

How much do you edit your fics?  Do you edit as you write or wait until you finish the first draft?

Do you use a beta reader/editor?

Do you take fic requests?  Why or why not?

Is there a specific word count that you hold yourself to/enjoy writing the most?

How much of your personal life/experience do you include in your fics?

What’s your favorite fic you’ve posted?

What fic are you proudest of?

What fic has been the hardest for you to write?

What is your most self-indulgent posted story?

What’s your most self-indulgent wip?

What is your favorite world that you’ve created for a fic?

Who’s your favorite character you’ve written?

What’s your favorite title that you’ve come up with?

Is there a trope or idea that you’d really like to write but haven’t yet?

What is your favorite genre to write?

What genre/trope do you tend to write the most?

If you could only write one type of AU for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Is there a trope that you’ve written before but are now sick of?

Who is your favorite character to write for?  Has this changed since you’ve started writing for that fandom?

What fic of yours would you say is the best introduction to you as a writer?

How would you describe your writing style?

Does what you like to write differ from what you like to read?

What’s the average word count of your fics?

What is the most-used tag on your ao3?

What’s the fandom/pairing distribution of your posted fics?

Have you noticed any patterns in your fics?  Words/expressions that appear a lot, themes, common settings, etc?

Are there any fics that you would change or rewrite if given the chance?

How conscious are you about including symbolism or foreshadowing in your fics?

Do you have a favorite piece of figurative language you’ve written?

Have you participated in any fic events/writing challenges?  If yes, what were they and did you enjoy them?

In [insert fic], what inspired the idea for the plot?

In [insert fic], what’s your favorite scene that you wrote?

In [insert fic], is there a deleted scene/idea you wish you could have included?  Why did it get cut?

What was the hardest part of writing [insert fic]?

If you rewrote [insert fic] now, would you change anything?

If you wrote a sequel to [insert fic], what would happen in it?

What’s a fun fact about [insert fic]?

If a fic was titled [insert made up title], what would this story be about/how would you write it?

Are there any fics that influenced you to write the way you do?

What are your favorite fics at the moment?

Are you subscribed to any writers on AO3?

Do you spend more time reading or writing?

What’s your favorite writing compliment you’ve gotten?

What do you tend to get complimented on the most about your writing?

Do you have a fic you wish got a bit more love?

Is there a particular fic that readers gravitated towards that you didn’t expect?

How do you deal with writing pressure, whether internal or external?

Why do you enjoy writing fanfiction?

What motivates you during the writing process?

Do you have any writing advice you want to share?

Free space - asker can come up with any writing or fic-related question they want!

#slocrastinating #will probably be too busy to reply to the asks asap + i like to ramble so my answers might be long sorry LOL #but i am doing a 2023 wrap up + i think these questions are extremely fun! #will set like a writing goal or something for 2024 since i proved to myself in aug 2023 that i CAN write consistently #it was crazy but i enjoyed it

[thomine]

Hello! Ekolu here!

I wanted to start something every two months or so that can help the Genshin writing community come together to work on something fun. What better thing than to do a writing event! This time around, the theme will be:

Writing Prompt: Uncommon Acts of Love Deadline: February 15, 2024

More details under the cut!

— What is a writing event?

✧ Writing events are special times throughout the year in which people voluntarily join together to write fics inspired by a specific prompt or set of prompts within a set time. Anyone and everyone is welcome to join!

— How do I join?

✧ The process is very simple. You do not need to inform us if you would like to join. Simply write the fic. When you are ready to post it, please add the tag your fic post with "#steambirduncommonacts". Then please DM us the link to your fic so we can feature it on this blog!

— Rules

✧ Works must be strictly sfw ✧ Works must encompass the writing prompt in some way ✧ Works must not contain any sensitive topics ✧ Works must be submitted by the ending date of the event

#another event i hope to participate in (not like i have 3-6 backlogged events BAHAHhah) #nap time

[thomine]

for the spotify wrap if you're still doing it 59 and freminet pls

spotify wrap ask meme (accepting!)

this got longer than i expected! but thank you so much :) i managed to write a bit and i'm happy.

you can find it here !!

#sloth mail #considering i didnt do a lot of writing the past few days #this was rather refreshing #i am not going to bother about the quality of said work. i'm just glad i finally wrote something hahaha

[thomine]

floating under pressure | freminet

RELATIONSHIP | freminet x reader

TAGS | teen and up audiences, suicide ideation (or being dragged into sea by a water nymph), misunderstandings, vague descriptions of drowning, reader is an overworked researcher, not proofread

SUMMARY | you reluctantly return to a place that does little to ease the tension in your shoulders or your grit. however, you chance upon someone who wants to do just that—even after an awkward first impression.

WORD COUNT | 1.4k words

INFO | more

The shores that kiss the remnants of Fontaine's long-lost prestigious institution is uninviting. You have never—and will never—return, which is why you're there, footprints sinking into the sands. Your research partner will notice you're gone, and perhaps he is already searching for you not out of concern or worry, but out of fear for the consequences of you disappearing.

You sit on a rock with a smooth surface and watch as the sun sets. Back at the lab, it was constant work with little yields. It's depressing to be there with a looming reminder of failure. The ruins of the research institution does not quell your fatigue, but the last thing you want to be is found so—against your nagging heart—you are here.

Alone.

At least, until someone appears in your peripheral. The dimming sky makes it hard to make out who it is, but the silhouette is clear. It's not a monster, just a person. A boy, and he trudges towards the waves, as if dragged by a heavy heart.

You pay no attention to him as he does not to you. His body submerges, and so do you in your thoughts, except you're dragged out of your pitiful reverie when you're alone for a minute longer than you thought.

Could he...

As you get up from your rock, you near the area you last saw the boy and gulp. Steambird stories of boys lured by Water Imps resurface in your memories. As a scientist, you aren't one to care for these tales, but the reality of the situation is grim: if you don't jump now, regardless of his reasons for entering the waters, another boy will be in the papers.

Splash!

It's hard to see so you swim faster knowing this is as much light as you can get. The lack of practice has made your body foreign in water, and before you know it, the coldness that bothered you as you dive coddles you in a chilling numbness.

When you wake, the glaring white ceiling back at the lab is not what greets you. Instead, it's a sky full of stars. Your hand lifts itself, sold by the illusion that if you just try to reach it, you'll find one cupped in your hands...

... Only to have a face break that immersion.

Pale blonde hair with a fringe covering his left light blue eye and a small frown that does little to make him any less interesting to stare at. Do the people of Fontaine look this gentle? How long have you been cooped up in your white room?

"Um..." the boy speaks. You hold your breath. Even his voice is soft as his features. "Are you alright?"

"I... I'm fine," you say as you sit upright, still a little giddy from what seems like a crazy dream, although the boy's hand behind your back helps tremendously. "What am I doing here…”

"You... you weren't going to... try something regrettable, were you?"

And then it hits you. The walk down the shore, the silhouette, cold waters. It is not a dream. When you look behind you, the ghastly research institution stands undeterred, and you remember what you're running from.

"There was someone else...!" You get on your feet. "I wasn't the only one who was in the waters. There was someone else. You must save him too."

Your saviour jumps at your loud voice, to which you're quick to apologise. Despite your attempts to calmly display the urgency of the situation—through hand gestures and a pleading expression instead of shouting—he remains still.

"If you're not going to, then I will—"

"Wait."

You're pulled back by his hands against your wrist, head the lowest you've seen as if he's bowing.

"I'm sorry for troubling you but there's no need to save the boy. There might have been a misunderstanding."

"Are you saying..." You squint your eyes, deciphering his features lighted by the fire he set up to match with your faint recollection of the silhouette across the beach. You’re stumped, unable to solve this puzzle, but as you turn left and right, there is no one else around.

"Why did you do that? I thought you were going to...” You look at him. He returns with a concerned gaze, as if you’re the one who should be questioned. You are the one that almost drowned, and he is perfectly fine.

“Well, I should be sorry—" you laugh awkwardly "I'm probably just really stressed. There was the failed specimen, and then my research partner kept insisting that he was right when the results weren't conclusive, and—and—"

Before you know it, your eyes become an ocean of emotions. You let out a sob before biting your lip to prevent anymore from escaping, then fall to the ground on your knees.

You are a scientist, yet you jumped to conclusions. How embarrassing. How shameful. Is this why everything you've done so far failed?

The boy pats your back with uncertainty.

"Thank you," you say in response to his touch as well as the tissue you don't quite know where is from. You blow your nose and try to take deep breathes to calm down. He seems flustered, so you don't want to weigh him any more.

“This isn't very professional of me. I should get going too, or else I'll just make the problem worse. I disturbed you didn't I? I'm so sorry,” you say.

He seems reluctant to answer.

"I still have things to do, but I want to help. You tried to help me too."

You croak a laugh, shaking your head.

"Tried."

Silence falls between you and him as you sniffle.

"Do you want to know?" he asks.

You raise your head, a meek laugh coming out of your lungs to fill up the awkwardness. He is not oblivious to it, and so his eyes once again avoid yours. It feels like he wants to run away too.

"Why I entered the waters,” he says at your confusion.

No more jumping to conclusions, you decide.

"Yes, if you'll show me." You stand, and not long you find your ankles graced by the tickles of rolling waves. The boy is far in front of you, already swimming.

"Are you scared?" He asks, and you almost miss his question if not for how quiet the night is.

"I don't know. Is there a reason to be here?" You turn back and see the lonesome tower with its iconic cubes hanging in the air. When you took up the research offer, you believed it would quench your thirst to understand the secrets behind its disaster. After consecutive failed attempts with a fast approaching deadline, you are starting to regret even trying.

There should be no reason to return, not a single spec of beauty to admire of the desolate institution. It only serves as a sign of pride and fallacy, one which lured you to dig a hole in hopes to find treasure except you end up in your grave.

When you look at Freminet after your tiny adventure down miserable memory lane, he looks disappointed. It's the same face you'll encounter if you report with no results, which propels you to take a step deeper as you're determined to handle only one disappointed individual—there is no room for another.

As you near him, he passes you a diving helmet, which you clumsily place on your shoulders. After he inspects it, he dives and you follow closely.

It's dark. You're reminded of the you in the same waters prior and your breath quickens. It echoes in your ears thanks to your helmet and becomes a reminder you're no longer alone.

Deeper and deeper you go. The glow on Freminet's diving suit is like a star in the night sky which you keep your eyes fixed on.

Soon, you find light. It's attached to some ancient ruin which Freminet swims into. You panic at first, unsure if it's safe, but when he pokes his head out, you chose to believe someone who looks that innocent.

Slowly, you swim towards him. He guides you deeper through turns and mechanisms. He's quick, hinting this isn't the first time he's been here.

Soon, you swim through an arch of a submerged dilapidated building. You recognise the design of the pillars, a signature for the ruined research institute. The place has brightened due to a clearing up front, and you see little critters waddle through the waters around you.

Past the arch is a large circular opening over head, its location perfectly below the moon that shines its calming light. Freminet remains underwater, basking at the sight of the moon. He looks at peace, a state you wish to reach so you do the same and lay on your back and facing the open sky.

You're floating, staring at the stars that beckon you despite the helmet distorting your view of them just a little. In fact, the water grants them a greater glow, making them feel so close to the point you believe you don't have to reach out to them.

You are among them.

You lost count how long you've stayed just staring, but Freminet taps your shoulder and you understand it is time.

When you resurface, you take out your helmet.

Freminet is smiling, and it's only then you realise you are too.

#genshin x reader #genshin impact x you #genshin reader insert #genshin impact x y/n #genshin impact x reader #freminet x y/n #freminet x reader #freminet x you #forget word doc or anything what if i wrote straight in my tumblr drafts #slo.w