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kohanayaki · 3 years

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.:Time and Time Again:. (Marauders Era x Reader) Ch 4

Snape looks back on your days at Hogwarts, how your friendship came to be, and how it came to end.

LINKS: CH 1 CH 2 CH 3 CH 4 CH 5 CH 6 CH 7 CH 8

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Ch 4 .:Budding Feelings and the Beginning of the End:.

Severus Snape had made a lot of mistakes in his life, and seeing you again after all these years was forcing him to relive every single one of them.

He stared blankly at the wall in front of him, shrouded in the darkness and grim silence of his empty house. He never thought he'd see you again, and certainly not under these circumstances. When he'd laid his eyes on you in the kitchen of 12 Grimmauld place he couldn't believe it. He, much like the rest of the Order (except for Molly, apparently) assumed you wouldn't be at these meetings any longer. After James and Lily were murdered and Sirius was thrown into Azkaban, you'd left London and headed to New York under the Ministry's alliance with MACUSA, hoping to help bridge the gap between muggle-borns and purebloods in America. He knew you had been back to meet Harry a handful of times, but he also knew that being in this city brought up painful memories for you, so he was as stunned as anyone else to see you standing there in the doorway, greeting them as if nothing were out of the ordinary.

He could see that traveling had been good for you. He'd heard through the Hogwarts circuit that you were back on auror duty across the world, taking special assignments from Dumbledore and the Minister for Magic himself. You seemed like you were doing better, but when you turned to smile at him he could see the hesitation and the sadness that brewed behind your eyes, likely his doing.

He desperately wanted things to go back to what they were before—

Before he'd ruined it. . .

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 1974 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Alright students,” Professor Slughorn said as everyone finished filing inside the room, “today we're going to be pairing off into new partners for the upcoming project.”

Groans and nervous chatter flooded the sound space immediately, no one very thrilled with having to work with someone new out of their control. You cast a glance over to Lily who looked equally displeased. You liked being her partner, you both excelled at the subject and worked really well together.

“Yes, yes, I know,” Slughorn said, waving the complaints off, “However, I am going to be giving you the luxury of choosing your own partners this time, but everyone—”

The energy in the room instantly shifted, everyone shoving around people to get to their friends.

“—keep in mind, if I see any slacking off or trouble brewing in these new partnerships I will not hesitate to rearrange them!”

Slughorns's words were completely lost among the commotion as people paired off before you could even get your bearings. Snape stalled as he stared at you from across the room; Lily had already been dragged away by Mary, and his brain was trying to work out how to ask you to be his partner.

Suddenly an arm was slung over your shoulder and you turned towards the new presence in surprise. You looked up to see Evan Rosier, the sleeves of his shirt rolled up to his elbows and his Slytherin tie loose around his neck.

Oh, sod it, Snape cursed internally. He was too late.

“Wanna partner up?” Rosier asked, a crooked grin gracing his chiseled features, “It'd be my honor to have the smartest Potions partner in class, not to mention the most attractive.”

You rolled your eyes at the praise. Evan was your friend, and he was nice to look at, but if he thought that you would be willing to do all the work for the both of you in exchange for some cheap compliments, then he had another thing coming. You locked eyes with Snape from across the room

“It would be your honor,” you smirked up at Rosier, “but I already have a partner, sorry.”

It took Snape a few seconds to realize what you were doing, but once he snapped out of it he made his way towards you. You almost chuckled at how robotic he looked as he did, clearly shocked.

Rosier looked between the two of you and rolled his eyes.

“Suit yourself, sweetheart,” he said, letting you go and pushing you lightly in Snape's direction, “but if you change your mind, you know where to find me.” He sent a wink your way that left Snape's blood inexplicably boiling,

“Thanks for that,” you grinned, “and just so you know, I would have chosen you even if he didn't come up to me, so don't get all pouty about it, okay?”

Severus just looked at you blankly. Even after four years it was frightening how well you were able to read him; for a moment he was scared that he'd accidentally projected his thoughts to you, but he wasn't anywhere near that level of legillemency yet. He wanted to say something that had some semblance of gratitude but settled on:

“Whatever.”

To which you just laughed and dragged him to your now shared desk.

You really were something else.

“Now then,” Professor Slughorn addressed the room, “today we will be beginning the new unit on toxic concoctions, starting with the Draught of Living Death. If you would all turn to page ten of your books, we will get started presently.”

You turned open your book and Severus did the same. As he did, you noticed that nearly every page was covered in small notes littering the margins, with some of the instructions circled, crossed out, or modified. You were hardly surprised, Snape had been pouring over this book since last year when he'd stolen it from a fifth year Slytherin who'd been speaking poorly of you (that last part you were unaware of).

You turned your attention to the directions, reaching over to preheat the burner so your cauldron would be hot enough by the time you began. However, as soon as you lit the flame with the tip of your wand, your cauldron shot up into the air, hitting the ceiling with a loud BANG! before crashing down back onto your table, breaking several of the glass instruments that were settled there.

Your face burned embarrassment as everyone in the room turned to look at you in shock.

“Snape, (L/n),” Slughorn said, surprised, “whatever happened?”

“I. . .” you began, not knowing what to say, “I don't know, I'm sorry, Professor.”

“Quite all right,” he said uncertainly, restoring your table and equipment with a wave of his wand, “just be sure whatever that was doesn't happen again.”

“Of course,” you mumbled, trying to ignore the snickering around you. If you noticed the way that it stopped as soon as Snape sent a deathly glare at the culprits, you didn't show it. You reached down to grab your cauldron, noticing that the bottom was dusted in some sort of orange powder. As you turned it over, a note fell out of it.

You're welcome, (L/n). Sorry I couldn't be there for the fireworks~

J.P.

“That sneaky little, ugh,” you crumpled the note, growling in frustration.

“What is it?” Severus asked, peering over your shoulder to glance at the paper. However, as soon as you tried to show it to him it vanished in your hands in a wisp of glowing embers. You turned to look at Severus who was still staring at you expectantly.

“It was Potter,” you rolled your eyes.

Anger flashed in Severus' eyes before confusion replaced it momentarily.

“But that was your cauldron, not mine. Why would Potter want to mess with you?”

And now the anger was back again. Snape was used to Potter’s crew targeting him; bullying and suffering through minor hexes had become an everyday occurrence, but when he imagined them doing anything to you it was enough to make him see red.

“Ah, well. . .” you trailed off, deciding that telling him you'd yelled at the group of Gryffindors: 'if you jerks want to have a go at Severus you're gonna have to get through me first!' was a bad idea.

“I sort of, maybe, kind of. . . started it?” you said. Severus raised a brow at you. “Look, Potter was asking for it, okay? It was about time someone messed with him for a change. And besides, it was hilarious, even Lily got a kick out of watching that broom hit him in the head.”

Severus chuckled at that, a hint of pride welling in his chest at yours and Lily's shared distaste for the Potter boy.

“But that was the last straw,” you declared, grabbing a Sopophorus bean from the bowl in front of you and a knife to cut it as per the instructions, “I'm sick and tired of him acting like he's better than everyone else,” you said, stabbing down with your knife for emphasis. The Sopophorus bean jumped as you did, sliding out from under your blade and skidding across your cutting board. You huffed as you grabbed it again, placing it back down and holding it in place. “And he walks around with that little posse of his like he runs this school!” You brought your knife down again, moving your fingers at the last second, but the bean still managed to slip away, trying to bounce back into the bowl.

“This means war!” you seethed, grabbing the runaway legume again, now at your wit's end, and crushing it in your fist. It stopped jumping as the beet-red juice of the plant dripped down your arm, and Severus looked at you with a small smirk on his face.

“Well, that's one way to do it,” he said.

“Shove off,” you said playfully, throwing the bean in his direction. He dodged it easily, his smile growing.

“No, really,” he said, almost more to himself than you as he scribbled out the word 'cut' and replaced it with 'crush' in his notebook, “you might be better at this than you let on.”

You blushed at the unexpected compliment, backhanded as it was.

“Excuse you, I happen to be fantastic at Potions,” you said, grabbing another bean and avoiding his gaze.

“Right, that's why your cauldron exploded.”

“That was sabotage,” you shot back.

“I was talking about last week,” Severus said cheekily, taking in your flustered expression.

You both went back to your ingredients, eventually discovering that crushing the beans with the flat of a knife was the best way to extract the juice without them jumping. You watched Severus out of the corner of your eye as he measured out the African Sea water, adding it gradually as he stirred the mixture counter-clockwise. The elixir turned a bright blue color, shimmering as if light were being reflected off of it. He continued on with the formula, snapping off a few fluxweed sprigs before adding them and lowering the heat with his wand, hardly looking at the instructions at all.

You wondered where this newfound confidence had come from. Severus was usually so rigid and withdrawn, but right now he looked more at ease than you had ever seen him. A spark was present in his eyes as he worked that you rarely ever saw, and it made you smile despite yourself.

The rest of your potion making process went on without a hitch, and you silently applauded yourself as you watched the other students around you struggle to get their concoctions together. Even Lily seemed to be having trouble, though Mary wasn't really helping other than offering moral support.

You turned back to focus on your own potion, stirring it with the ladle and mesmerized by the way it began to turn a deep plum color. Meanwhile, Severus was cleaning up your shared station, looking over at the brew. His brows furrowed as he examined it.

“Just stir it a bit more,” he said, coming up behind you and placing his hand on top of yours, “the color is still off.”

Your face burned at the unexpected contact; Snape certainly wasn't a touchy person, so the act caught you completely off guard, though you'd be lying if you said you didn't like it. Severus nearly jumped backwards, absolutely mortified when he realized what he was doing. It was him micromanaging more than anything; he was so focused on getting the potion right he didn't even notice he was moving his own body as he gave you the instruction.

“Sorry,” he said, feeling quite possibly the lamest he'd ever felt in his life.

“It's okay,” you said, biting the inside of your lip nervously and continuing to stir like he said. Your light response allowed Snape to relax, his shoulders lowering a full three inches. He'd been certain you would have reacted to his mistake with disgust or repulsion, but you didn't. What did that mean? You were utterly confusing. Despite how well you could read him, Severus was unable to get a read on you at all. If he had been, he would have noticed the tiny smile on your face as you stirred, silently wishing his hand were back on yours.

You and Snape stood at attention as Slughorn peered down at your potion, looking mildly impressed. He reached into his robes, procuring an oak leaf from who knows where, and dropped it into your cauldron. The leaf floated on top of the liquid for just a moment before its edges began to burn. It furled from the unseen heat, folding in on itself and disappearing into the inky depths of the liquid. Slughorn's expression lit up, his impression no longer mild.

“Merlin's beard, it's perfect!” he exclaimed, “in all my years I've never seen a pair recreate this potion exactly as you two have done today.”

You beamed at the praise, your smile only widening as you saw your emotions mirrored in Severus' face, albeit more subtly.

Over the course of your fourth year, you and Snape continued to excel in Potions, receiving much praise from Professor Slughorn and a lot of glares from your fellow students. However, there was something else that continued that year, and that was your increasing interactions with James Potter.

“I just don't get why you even bother with him,” Snape had said to you one day while you were in Potions. Your prank war with James was at its peak, and you were sidetracked that day in class coming up with new ideas to get back at him.

“It's a full on battle now, Sev,” you said, “I can't back down! Now, for my next one I was thinking something along the lines of a callback to one of his earlier stunts. Maybe get him back for tampering with my cauldron at the beginning the year.”

“(Y/n)—”

“I've got a few friends in Gryffindor, and apparently he talks about his prank plans way too loudly in the common room, so I have a head start on this one. They mentioned something about my shampoo—“

“(Y/n),” Severus stressed, finally catching your attention. You looked up at him, embarrassed at you rambling. “Why do you keep doing this?” he asked, “he's just baiting you. You know that.”

“It keeps them from doing anything that targets you, right?” you questioned back.

Severus didn't know what to say at that. It was true, ever since you had declared war on James, he and his stupid friends hadn't really bothered with him at all. Were you doing this for him? He didn't know what to do with the thought.

You were, of course, but you thought it better not to mention that in the last few months this had been going on, you'd also begun to find the rivalry and banter between you and James fun.

“Gather 'round students, gather 'round!” Slughorn beckoned the class over, disrupting your train of thought and putting an end to your conversation, “now, would anyone like to identify the potion in this cauldron here?” He gestured to a shockingly pink liquid that seemed to swirl on its own. Plum and periwinkle smoke wafted through the air above it in delicate spirals.

“That's Amortentia,” Lily said, “it's a love potion that's supposed to smell different to everyone depending on what scents attract them.”

“Right you are, Miss Evans,” Slughorn said proudly, “would you like to tell us what you smell?”

“Cinnamon,” she started slowly, “warm spices, butterbeer, sandalwood. . .” her cheeks reddened significantly, as if she'd made some sort of realization. “Th-that's all.” You stared at her quizzically but she just shook her head. You'd have to ask her about this later. . .

“(L/n),” Slughorn said, “would you be so kind as to do the same?”

“Sure,” you said, stepping up to the cauldron. It was captivating, almost drawing you in physically. “Wild lavender,” you said, smiling, your mother had a garden full of them when you were growing up, “rain when it hits the pavement, and old leather books.” Scents you wouldn't realize until much later all correlated with a certain person.

“Very different scents for very different people,” Professor Slughorn said, “thank you for demonstrating, you two. Now, we will not be brewing this potion today for obvious reasons. It is incredibly dangerous, capable of creating not true love, but unhinged obsession. What we will be doing, however, is studying its effects. . .”

“Strongest love potion in the world, huh?” Evan suddenly appeared at your side, “funny, I could have sworn it smelled just like you, although you wouldn't need a potion to reign me in~”

“Put a sock in it, Rosier,” you said, shoving him away playfully.

“Aw, come on, just one date wouldn't hurt,” he said, “I'm pulling out all my best lines here!”

“That's the best you've got?”

“Ouch.”

Snape couldn't help but glare at the Slytherin boy, not liking how close he was to you. Nice as he seemed, Snape knew how he could really be. He didn't think you'd be such good friends with Rosier if you knew he was knee deep in the dark arts as soon as the sun set on the castle. Then again, Severus wasn't one to talk.

Over the course of the year he noticed that you only grew closer to James, something that bothered him immensely. He was grateful that you had gotten his bullying to stop, but he hated that the way you had gone about it was to turn Potter into a friend. . .

“Merlin, he keeps looking over at you, Lils,” you said.

Lily and Severus looked over to where James sat with Sirius, Remus, and Peter in their corner table as usual. Somehow they always managed to be at The Three Broomsticks at the exact same time as your trio, almost as if they knew you were there. James Potter was, in fact, looking towards your table, until your friends not-so-discreetly turned to look at him and he diverted his gaze elsewhere.

“Idiot,” you rolled your eyes as you took another sip of your butterbeer.

Lily looked between you and James' table for a moment before turning back to you.

“Actually, (Y/n), he's staring at you.”

You looked at her like she'd grown a second head but then began to laugh.

“Is he? Jeeze, what a creep,” you said, but with affection in your voice that wasn't missed by Severus, “it's probably because I saved his ass the other day and he's still reeling from it.”

“Oh,” she said, a hint of what you swore was relief in her tone until she realized what you said, “Wait, you what?”

“Sirius and I were talking in the forest and we got ambushed by Malfoy's motley crew,” you said, “and Potter showed up because of course he did. It was just a little duel, no big deal.”

“What?!” Lily said, concern written all over her face, “they fancy the dark arts, (Y/n), you could have been hurt!”

Severus stared into his drink, unable to look at either of you.

“I'm fine, Lils,” you insisted, “and trust me, I don't think Malfoy's going to be bothering anyone anymore. Just show him a picture of a squid and he'll probably screech like a banshee.”

Lily laughed along with you, partially in confusion, until the first part of your statement hit her with a slight delay.

“Hold on, you were in the forest with Black? And did you just call him Sirius?” she asked, her teasing making your face flush.

“We just. . . figured some stuff out. . . It was nothing like what you're thinking, so drop it,” you grumbled, taking another drink to hide your embarrassed face.

“Whatever you say, (Y/n),” Lily sang, taking a sip of her own drink.

Severus felt jealousy bubble up in him like a disease. He cast his gaze upwards, his eyes locking momentarily with James'. His arch rival rose a cocky brow at him, his gaze unmistakably shifting to you and Lily before staring Snape down again. Severus took a sharp breath to steel himself, that feeling in the pit of his stomach never really going away.

That was the beginning of the end.

Read chapter 5 here!

Taglist: @sleep-i-ness, @blackpinkdolan, @parker-natasha, @ornella0910 @undertaker1827 @thatwierdo-koemi @nxstalgicnxbxdy

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ourloveisforthelovely · 3 years

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Angel (one shot)

Harry Potter Marauders Era

Request helloooo can i ask for like a quick regulus x reader oneshot where the reader sings and regulus hears her voice and basically falls in love with it but he didnt see her face so he just comes back everyday to the same place in the hope of listening to her singing and seeing her face this time? this sounds specific i know but i feel like some soft reggie is all i need now 😭

Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader

Rating: M- mention of self harm

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Suffocating… that was the best word that Regulus could use to describe his life. After joining up with the death eaters at the lovely age of 16, Regulus had quickly grown to regret his decision. Anytime that the dark mark began to burn in the slightest, Regulus found himself dying for an excuse not to go. There was, however, not one...at least nothing in Lord Voldemort’s eyes that would be “good enough.”

On the outside, Regulus had to keep his smooth and reserved demeanor. It didn’t matter on the inside how much he was screaming. No one cared. The people that did know what he was doing continued to go on and on about how he was doing “the right thing, the noble thing.”

It was 7:00pm and Regulus found himself running down a quiet hallway. He had to get out of the Slytherin common room. He had to get away from Evan Rosier and Barty Crouch Jr. They had been so gleeful over a muggle that had been murdered the night before. Neither seemed to care about this person nor the family that they left behind. Regulus, when the deed was taking place, didn’t care. He stood stony faced as the man begged for his life. The moment Voldemort uttered his “favorite” spell, Regulus had to swallow back the feeling of nausea as he watched the light leave the man’s eyes.

Regulus had done well not thinking about the “deed” all day. It wasn’t until he returned to the common room and overheard Evan’s conversation did Regulus find himself regretting the day that he was born.

No one asked a question when Regulus walked out of the common room. Why would they? People would be dumb to question Regulus on something. People knew not to question Regulus on his doing unless they wanted to be jumped.

Regulus stopped the moment that his hands hit the balcony. Breathing heavily, he closed his eyes mentally begging for the memory to leave his mind.

Just stop...I fucking hate this!

Regulus thought miserably. He was half tempted to throw himself off of the balcony. It looked like a good distance and if he was lucky wouldn’t survive the fall. Death would be better than living the way that he was at the moment!

The brooding stopped the moment that a soft voice caught Regulus’ attention. He knew a lot of the “choir kids” would come up to this particular area of the castle to practice at points. Before today, however, Regulus had never paid any of them any attention. Today, it was different. This voice was soft, gentle...everything that Regulus needed.

Right away he recognized the French folk song that he had heard numerous times as a child. Leaning his head back against the stone wall, all of the anxiety and tension slowly left. Regulus took a deep breath and looked down at his hands. They were no longer shaking.

I should leave...but I don’t want to. She, whomever she is, has to have the most beautiful voice. She sounds like an angel.

Regulus thought with a tiny smile. Although he had no belief in heaven, hell, angels, or demons hearing this voice had to be what an angel would sound like if there were one. This soft voice was everything that Regulus needed to hear when he needed to be told “that everything would be alright.”

Over the following days, Regulus found himself in the same place at the same time. It didn’t matter what kind of hell that he had going on. The moment that soft voice would sing all of the bad would vanish. Even if it was just one song, Regulus was feeling a million times better when he had to return to the Slytherin common room.

The question plaguing Regulus’ mind now was who did the voice belong to? He had been trying to put an angelic voice with a face nonstop and was coming up with nothing. None of the girls in Slytherin house fit the idea that Regulus had in his mind.

I have to find out.

He muttered as the signing stopped. Standing up, he quickly walked into the room not having any idea what he was about to say. Regulus knew that whatever girl this was would probably think that he was a creep for spying on her night after night. What kind of girl would want that?

“I know you’re there.��

The singing had stopped and was replaced with a soft comment on Regulus’ appearance. Regulus turned around to see Y/n Lupin sitting by the window. You were the girl...the voice...it all fit! Regulus blinked a few times as he took everything in. Of course, it was you. It all made sense.

“Um...hi.”

Regulus muttered. He wasn’t for sure if he had ever spoken to you before. The two of you were in the same year but your paths didn’t cross much. You were in Hufflepuff and often kept to your little group of friends or with your older brother.

You, meanwhile, smiled noticing Regulus’ awkward silence.

“You’ve been up here the past few nights.”

You commented. Regulus’ face blushed as you patted the seat beside you. Regulus slowly sat down and kept his eyes straight ahead.

He had to be a blithering idiot. There would be no way in hell that anything between the two of you would ever work. You were Remus Lupin’s sister. Regulus didn’t foresee Remus being too onboard with his sister dating a Slytherin (even if Slytherins and Hufflepuffs made great matches).

“You were upset that first night. Are you better now?”

You asked. You knew the question was probably intrusive but it came out before you really thought better of it. That night, a few nights ago, you had been up doing what relaxed you the most...singing. When you heard the angry footsteps you considered stopping but thought about how your singing seemed to comfort your own brother when he was upset. Maybe this person needed a little comforting too (even if you didn’t know them).

When you realized that it was Regulus Black the feeling of overwhelming sympathy washed over you. You didn’t know much about Regulus other than the fact that he was Sirius’ younger brother. Over the years that you were in school, you couldn’t help but notice how sad Regulus looked most of the time. You could see those sad dark eyes from your seat at the Hufflepuff table and wanted nothing more than to give him something to smile about. He reminded you of a puppy that had been kicked one too many times. If he was anything like Sirius then you knew that was exactly how Regulus was.

It was no secret that Walburga Black was cruel to her children. You knew first hand of the abuse. You had heard about it from Sirius himself. If that was what was plaguing Regulus’ mind every night that he came to the balcony, maybe you could give him something to feel better about?

“There really isn’t getting any better.”

Regulus commented as you scooted closer. You had a feelin what that vague comment was leading toward.

“About being a death eater?”

Regulus’ face went pale as he turned to look at you with wide eyes.

“How do you know? Did my brother tell you?”

You shook your head at the raised tone of his voice.

“Ssh now. We don’t need god and everyone to hear. I saw your arm doing potions one day.”

Regulus sneered in your direction. He didn’t know how to react. Maybe just be cold like normal? What the hell was he supposed to say?

“Let me guess, you are going to tell me that I am a horrible person and that I shouldn’t be doing what I’m doing...no matter if it's what my family expected of me.”

Your momentary silence was driving Regulus nutty. After a few moments, you finally spoke.

“No. I was actually going to say I can’t imagine what you are going through. Sometimes our families are our own worst enemies.”

Regulus sighed.

“You’ve got that right. Look, I wasn’t spying on you. I want to just throw that out there.”

You smiled.

“It's alright. Your aura doesn’t seem as tense after you’re here for a bit.”

It was Regulus’ turn to be silent. He was trying to decide if he wanted to give you a compliment. If he messed things up, there was a good chance that he would never hear your angelic voice again...and that wasn’t something that he wanted to risk losing.

“Your voice is nice….its soothing.”

“Thank you.”

You replied as Regulus turned back to face you. His face this time was different. He had gone from death eater to the sad puppy that needed love.

“That first night...I was actually considering pitching myself off of that balcony. Hearing you...that was the first time I heard the most beautiful voice. It was like gravity.”

You reached out and gently took your hand in his. Were you overstepping your boundaries with a boy that you knew nothing about and who in turn knew nothing about you? Possibly. Did you care? Not really.

“I’m glad that you didn’t do that. You know, believe it or not, I realize how hard things can be with family. My family isn't normal…”

“Your brother is a werewolf.”

Regulus commented and instantly regretted his choice of words when your face went pale.

“Not that it matters though. It's just who Remus is.”

Regulus quickly added, hoping to save what hope of a friendship that he had with you. You, to his relief, smiled.

“Yes, it is who he is. I feel no guilt in telling you this now. With his condition, I tend to be second in the family. My parents don’t mean to put me on the back burner but it happens. It's hard...so I know now you must feel. How did you figure it out, if you don’t mind me asking. He literally tells no one.”

Regulus shrugged.

“Just put the puzzle pieces together.”

You continued to rub slow circles over Regulus’ palm hoping to relax him further. This was the first time (other than James and Sirius) someone had figured out Remus “furry little problem.”

“You’re really intelligent and perceptive then. If you want...you know...we could do this every evening when you're free. We don’t have to tell anyone that we are meeting up. Sometimes it's nice just to have someone outside of your friend circles.”

Regulus looked up and was clearly surprised.

“You would want to see me again?”

You nodded.

“If you want to see me that is...no pressure.”

Regulus quickly nodded, cutting you off.

“I would love to see you again...maybe around 7 tomorrow?”

You gave his hand a squeeze.

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

_________

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sirius-whoisleft · 4 years

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GENERAL INFORMATION ➤

Full Legal Name: Sirius Orion Black III Nickname(s): Padfoot Age: 18 Gender & Pronouns: cisgender male; he/him Sexuality: Initially, I began writing him as a demiromantic pansexual. However, I am pleased to announce that with each day I write him? He not only gets gayer, but his capacity to love and crush and pine grows threefold.

Date of Birth: November 3rd Horoscope: Scorpio, baby!!!!! Hogwarts House: Gryffindor, though and through Nationality: French by way of London Occupation:

Sirius is currently a seventh year Gryffindor student at Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry which is, all things considered, a pretty sweet gig. He’s preparing for NEWTS! He’s living off the trust fund provided for him by his dearly departed Uncle Alphard! He hasn’t been kicked out yet! He’s snogging his boyfriend in the library every chance he gets!

And, improbably, Sirius Black is preparing for his future.

Recently, Sirius had been admitted to the competitive and prestigious Gringott’s cursebreaking training program. After graduation, he’ll make that five-times-a-week trek down to Diagon Alley and immerse himself in ancient societies, runes, translations, curse-handling, history, desert magic and...yes...wait for it...copious paperwork! Upon graduation from the program, Sirius will emerge a newly minted and proud Cursebreaker, working at the bank’s back office most days, doing research and translations and the like, but also getting his hands dirty on trips. The pyramids of Egypt and the tombs of China will call to him, and he can’t wait to see them all!

Unfortunately, his time with the cursebreakers will be cut short, and he’ll hurl himself headlong into his Order of the Phoenix membership under Alastor Moody’s dark influence...but that’s a story for another day.

Summarized in One Word: Bombastic!

APPEARANCE ➤

Faceclaim: Ben Barnes Height: Just as with the sexuality question, Sirius gets both gayer AND SHORTER the longer I write him. Currently he’s hovering around 5′7″ by accurate standards, but in my mind he’s a tiny little pocket bastard. Hair Color: Black Eye Color: Grey Noticeable Features: Devastating good looks. Emphasis on the devastating due to the strong Black family resemblance. A growing collection of tattoos. Long hair that he’s wont to elegantly flick away from his eyes. Perpetual haughty looks off into the distance.

Typical Outfit or General Fashion Sense: Sirius dresses simply, but well. How well depends on the occasion and your personal opinion, but it can’t be argued that he looks good doing it. His typical layabout clothes consist of either a band-tee or button-down with a pair of trousers or muggle jeans (the magic of which Remus Lupin introduced him to); for formal affairs, he still remembers how to walk the walk and can pull off a suit and tie with uncomfortable ease.

Truth be told, Sirius is still figuring out his fashion sense! He went from his clothing being dictated by his family to skating by on a Hogwarts uniform for several years. He’ll come into his own slowly and with purpose – the first step being an overindexing on punky, black leather jackets.

HISTORY ➤

Hometown: London Financial Status: Trust fund bastard! After being cut off by the House of Black, Sirius coasted by broke and on the basis of favors from the Potter family for over a year before his Uncle Alphard passed away and left him a hefty little nest egg with which to make his way in the world. For all his talk about wanting to be of the common people and despising the wealthy and all they stand for, Sirius was raised with the safety net of exorbitant wealth and still defaults to many of those old habits and assumptions. Spoken Languages: French was his first language, followed by English and then Latin. He’s deeply interested in dead languages and the study of runes. Dream Job: Cursebreaker! Bad Habits: Biting the inside of his cheek. Lashing out at those that care about him most. Pushing friends and concern away. Refusing to apply himself lest he try and fail. Squandering his education. Cocaine, alcohol, and other substances; his general proneness to addition. Recklessness and adrenaline-highs. Stealing the covers at night. Joking to cover up his real feelings. A proclivity for dark magic. Singing in the shower.

FAMILY BACKGROUND ➤

Mother: Walburga Black (neé Black), estranged. Father: Orion Black, estranged. Sibling(s): Regulus Black, estranged. Pet(s): n/a Cousin(s): Bellatrix Black. Andromeda Black. Narcissa Black. Evan Rosier.

MAGICAL ABILITIES ➤

Wand: Reed, dragon heartstring, 10 ½ inches, rigid

Patronus (and which memory they’re currently using to cast a patronus if they can, or which one they’d use if they could): Like his Animagus form, Sirius’s patronus takes the shape of a large dog. He’s able to cast it with highly varying levels of success lately; while he has a good tutor in Remus and a willingness to try, Sirius’s magic has always been affected by his mood swings and he just...has too many of those to predict. His most successful attempts have been driven by days of rare concentration and memories colored by the other Marauders. Currently, were he to try and produce one, Sirius would think about the day that Remus kissed him in their dormitory following The Prank fallout – giving him affection and forgiveness and a second chance.

Boggart: The House of Black version of himself - the one that might have happened if he hadn’t been able to break away from his family in time.

OWLS: Ancient Runes, History of Magic, Astronomy, Charms, Defense Against the Dark Arts, Transfiguration, Potions, Herbology, Arithmancy NEWTS: Ancient Runes (O), History of Magic (A), Astronomy (O), Charms (O), Defense Against the Dark Arts (O), Transfiguration (E), Potions (O), Arithmancy (O)

What Kind of Magic do They Excel at:

Sirius’s best subject is Defense Against the Dark Arts. He is handy with a wand, knows his own power, and is unafraid to act in the heat of the moment – perhaps a bit recklessly, but there’s nothing life-or-death about the inside of the classroom, and so he simply manages to come off looking talented.

The most important reason behind him succeeding in that class is the simple fact that he believes it to be useful; it’s going to Mean Something in the Real World, and so it’s one of the few school subjects that commands his attention and respect in equal measure.

He also has a talent for Ancient Runes that’s finally being appreciated—now that he’s allowing people to appreciate it, and owning his deep interest in the subject openly—and, unfortunately, for the complexities of Dark Magic.

PSYCHOLOGY ➤

MB Type: The Campaigner

Few personality types are as creative and charismatic as Campaigners. Known for their idealism and enthusiasm, Campaigners are good at dealing with unexpected challenges and brightening the lives of those around them. Campaigners’ imagination is invaluable in many areas, including their own personal growth.

Yet Campaigners can be easily tripped up in areas where idealism and kindness are more of a liability than an asset. Whether it is finding (or keeping) a partner, staying calm under pressure, reaching dazzling heights on the career ladder or making difficult decisions, Campaigners need to put in a conscious effort to develop their weaker traits and additional skills.

Enneagram: ENFP [read more]

Excellent communicators. ENFPs have outstanding communication skills and they know how to use them. They will engage anyone in conversation at the drop of a hat, and they know how to draw others out in a way that keeps the discussion flowing. Whether casually shooting the breeze or collaborating in the workplace, ENFPs provide the horsepower that keeps the engine of conversation humming along.

Imaginative. ENFPs are imaginative problem solvers and reject the idea that traditional ways are always the best. In every situation they believe an original approach is possible—and desirable—and they refuse to become prisoners of habit or routine. They see roadblocks as opportunities, and they confront every challenge they face with fresh eyes and no preconceived notions.

Natural leaders. ENFPs step forward to assume positions of leadership readily and instinctively. They are confident in their ability to handle demanding responsibilities many people find scary or intimidating. ENFP leaders are consensus builders who work hard to gain the trust of their associates, patiently listening to their ideas and reacting enthusiastically to their good suggestions. Their assertive, “can-do” attitude inspires others and motivates them to action.

Strong social conscience. Often active in social movements, ENFPs stand up for what they believe in without apology. Some people talk the compassion game but don’t follow through with meaningful action, but ENFPs believe it is vitally important to back up caring words with good deeds. Despite their friendly nature, an ENFP will go supernova with righteous anger when they are exposed to suffering and injustice. They can get quite loud and assertive, if that’s what it takes to get their opinions heard.

Hypersensitivity. ENFPs sometimes let their imaginations run wild and often perceive bad intentions that don’t really exist. Being hyper-alert and aware helps ENFPs improve their social comprehension, but reading between the lines only works when something is actually hidden there. If it isn’t, misunderstandings can occur and hurt feelings can damage good relationships.

Lack of focus and follow through. ENFPs are endlessly creative, capable of filling a thousand days with a thousand bold ideas. But they don’t always follow through on their inspirations, and if others are not brought on board to handle the details, their best ideas may never be put into practice. ENFPs rely on their initial excitement and passion too much and don’t always show the discipline necessary to translate their ideas into real-world production. They have a tendency to start new projects before the last ones are finished, and failing to see things through is where ENFPs sometimes come up short.

Overthink things. ENFPs have a tendency to perceive slights, resentments or hostility where none actually exist, and their habit of overanalyzing other people’s behavior can lead to unnecessary anger and conflict. If ENFPs aren’t receiving as many compliments as they expect from their significant others, their insecurities can be activated and they may start to feel unappreciated and unloved.

Overemotional and approval-seeking. While emotional expression is a core part of the ENFP's identity, they can come on too strong. The bubbly, energetic style of ENFPs doesn’t mesh well with every partner and introverts, in particular, can sometimes feel steamrolled in their presence. ENFPs are also approval-seekers, and in their desire to receive praise and acknowledgment they may try a little too hard to make a good impression, talking too much and listening too little in the process.

Moral Alignment: Chaotic Good

Archetype:

55% Rebel - The Rebel is comfortable throwing caution to the wind—and bucking the system...if that means getting their point across.

25% Advocate - The Advocate is the one everyone wants on their side. In the name of justice, they are not afraid to challenge authority or speak up for others.

20% Caregiver - Friendly, sincere, and compassionate, the Caregiver finds their reward in helping others. No one could ask for a better best friend.

Temperament: Sanguine

#tag: character development #plot prompt friday #***#tag: inspo #tag: headcanon

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legatumrpg · 6 years

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We want to start off by thanking everyone for applying. There were some tough decisions that needed to be made, especially when each and every application we received was so unique in their own way. Congratulations to everyone under the cut, your applications absolutely floored us. Each application presented their characters with such nuace or complexity, sometimes even both, we know that you all will bring magic to our little roleplay. Please see our CHECKLIST for further instructions.

LEO IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF SIRIUS BLACK ! For all that he pictures capturing his cousins, he can’t picture killing them. Nor can he picture Bellatrix or Regulus killing him. And maybe it’s his subconscious failsafe against hysteria. We had three amazing applications for Sirius, so this was one of our hardest decisions, but it was the way you wrote his flaws that really had us decided. The complexity of who Sirius is and how he got there was so interesting to read and we loved seeing just how much his past still affects his life.

ZED IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF SEVERUS SNAPE ! In many ways Severus was changed drastically from the quiet, caring person they had always been to the cold, cynical person they became. We loved seeing the change that occurred which caused Severus to become who they are today. The fact that Severus faith in the Death Eaters being shaken due to the extremes that they don’t believe in and how the Marauders, in a way, reminds them why they chose the side is gold.

ALEXA IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF ROMAN MULCIBER ! In the end, Roman was a young god, leaving a trail of scorched earth in his wake. Terror was beauty and war was terror after all. This application is exactly how we envision Roman through all of their temptation, entitlement, and complexity. Everything about the application screamed Roman and none of us wanted to stop reading about them. We know that wherever you take Roman, we’ll not so secretly be rooting for them.

MANU IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF RITA SKEETER ! However, Rita always knew she was meant for more. And she shall get everything she always wanted. Fame, fortune and especially recognition. Rita is one of my personal favorite characters and the way you made them come alive is just absolutely beautiful. We know that they are going to do amazing things, even if those things are harsh or twisted. FACE CLAIM CHANGE TO ANA DE ARMAS IS APPROVED.

LUISA IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF REMUS LUPIN ! His first memories became those of tearful full moons, of clutching at his mother’s skirt and sobbing, begging her to fix him, falling to his knees in front of the Crucifix on the parlor wall and demanding that she tell him why God had let him become a monster. This application just left us shook. Adding a religious aspect to Remus’ life is something we haven’t seen before and we absolutely love it. We love the idea of Remus being allowed into the werewolf clan and seeing how that plays out.

CAITLIN IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF REGULUS BLACK ! After all, a frightened animal is the most dangerous. That line alone had us wanting to accept the application immediately. You really want into the portrayal of Regulus and made him your own. We could go on all day talking about how much we loved your application for Regulus and we really cannot wait to see what happens next to the dear.

MANU IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF MOLLY WEASLEY ! Then, a hatred started to grow inside Molly’s chest. the otherwise sweet and caring mother to all was facing a feeling she could not quite process – anger. Molly is so many things; a mother, a sister, a friend but they are also are a person who isn’t without their flaws. We know that you are going to do wonders and we are at the edge of our seats to see Molly going down a darker path.

SKY IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF MARLENE MCKINNON ! Hogwarts was a battleground for Marlene; not one where she encountered bloodshed or death, but one in which her knowledge would be tested. Marlene is a character of force. They are always sure of themselves and when things don’t happen as they plan, they can get a bit heated. We absolutely loved how you portrayed Marlene and how they are even more drawn into the cause due to the recent deaths. We cannot wait for Marlene’s fight to come alive.

LARA IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF MARY MACDONALD ! Even broken dolls have sharp edges. We could have quoted anything from this application and it would have been exactly how we imagine Mary. The way you handled Mary’s attack was written just so beautifully and the way that you controlled her emotions and response which left so much room for development with the other players involved is just wonderful. We are so excited to have you with us! FACE CLAIM CHANGE TO COURTNEY EATON IS APPROVED.

SASS IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF LUCINDA TALKALOT ! Blood separated them, but superficially she saw herself as an equal. The way that you describe how exactly they feel when it comes to blood and their doubts that they keep hidden away is just so beautifully written. As our admin Neetu pointed out, it’s like being dropped in the middle of shark-infested waters and constantly wondering where your next attack is coming from but instead of physical attacks, they are verbal and underhanded. This reminded us of Icarus, just without the disastrous end...yet.

AL IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF LILY EVANS ! Starting off, she was only assigned to puff pieces — aimed towards teenage girls, and housewives — slowly, but steadily, she took to spinning them in a way that she could talk directly to her audience, sending off strong messages about the world and situation they are living in. A way of voicing her opinion. Lily is such an icon and we really feel like you managed to capture exactly that in your biography. You really show that Lily has a lot of passion for many different things which ultimately left them wanting to send messages, to get their voice across to those who may have the same thoughts as them. They really are a force to be reckoned with.

ERIN IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF JAMES POTTER ! Even in the midst of a war, he can’t shake his wholehearted belief in the inherent goodness of the world. This application gives us more than the bully narrative of James back in Hogwarts. It shows that yes, James made mistakes, and yes he was, and on still levels still is, immature but James has grown so much since their years at Hogwarts. They are more than their mistakes and this application really shows that aspect of him.

MARIE IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF ISABELLA WILKES ! There are many downfalls to infinite wealth—but as Isabella Wilkes will frequently note on, “it’s also really fucking fun.” We cannot describe a better quote other than this one that just has Isabella’s name written all over it. We are absolutely living for Isabella and the tragic mistake they made resulting in actual consequence. The biography gave us a look at their entire life and we just absolutely love it. We know that you are going to be an amazing Isabella!

HOLLY IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF GILDEROY LOCKHART ! Anyone with a pulse and a Daily Prophet subscription can tell that war has arrived, but even with the future of the Wizarding World at stake, he struggles to care about something unless it involves him personally. As admin Neetu stated, ‘ I stan a man who stans himself. ’ This application is just beautifully written and shows every single aspect of Gilderoy and their big head. We cannot say anything but nice words about the application as we believe that you completely nailed them.

JEN IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF EVAN ROSIER ! Like an eagle crowned with the Rosier insignia, Evan soared. We absolutely loved every bit of this application. The fact that they came into the deadly elite group with distrust in their hearts? Golden. We absolutely love how Evan seems like they don’t really want anything to do with the cause but rather they want safety from the people involved.

JO IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF CHARITY BURBAGE ! All her life, she was sweet Charity. Soft Charity. Shy Charity. Charity ‘can’t-make-her-own-choices’ Burbage. She wants to be strong Charity. Wow. This was very much a different take with Charity than we expected and we absolutely loved it. We loved how their parents want them to be a good pureblood and don’t approve “joining the Muggles”, really we just loved every bit of it! FACE CLAIM CHANGE TO BAE SUZY IS APPROVED.

HAYLEY IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF ARTHUR WEASLEY ! You see, they use very thin strips of hard material connected by ropes to cover their windows instead of curtains. Isn’t that fascinating? We absolutely loved this far more than just what JK Rowling wrote. You have captured everything that is Arthur and honestly, we cannot find one single flaw in this application? Arthur has captured our hearts not just by being a loving husband and father but also due to their curious eye and warm spark in their soul. We really hope that he discovers the function of a rubber duck. AGE CHANGE HAS BEEN APPROVED.

G IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE AMYCUS CARROW ! The golden boy, the perfect child, the heir to his family’s legacy — the one thing that finally made his father believe he had made something good. The whole thing about their parents wanting to save their heir was honestly so beautifully written. As you said, Alecto was just as loved, but Amycus was worshipped. And the fact that Amycus believes themself as equal to Voldemort? Just, all around wow.

ALEXA IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF AMELIA BONES ! Justice might as well as have been her first spoken word, because young Amelia Bones refused to yield for any form of injustice she witnessed though at the time injustice for Amelia meant not sharing a toy broomstick with the rest of the group. Okay, you absolutely nailed Amelia. The quote alone just screams her name. We loved the fact that Amelia struggles to understand the cause of Death Eaters and how focused they are on justice. Everything about this application is just solid.

LIZ IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF ALICE FORTESCUE ! Her only option now is to find the answers herself, regardless of the danger that might put her in. This was another hard decision, four applications and all of them amazing. Alice’s edges and raw anger came across so vividly and we cannot get over it. The writing of this application is absolutely beautiful, we are so excited to see the trouble she stirs up.

DANI IS ACCEPTED FOR THE ROLE OF ALECTO CARROW ! Alecto can so easily remember the day she was approached by the Dark Lord in her dreams, with his promises of allowing her to have the powers that she so deserved and had been craving yet would never have because she was not the heir. Everything that we envisioned about Alecto goes back to her parents. Her anger, her power, her desire to be better and this application really reflected on that. We loved the fact that she’s never going to forgive her parents for thinking she’s inferior, it really just screams like Alecto!

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midnight-serpentine-blog · 6 years

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FAQ

In General

Do you take requests? My guy, without requests, this blog will go dry very quickly. We are high maintenance and require a lot of attention.

Will you write all requests that you receive? We reserve the right not to write a request if we don’t vibe with it. We will explain why we won’t, and whining won’t change our minds. Otherwise we will do our absolute best to see that all requests get written.

What if I don’t like something in your fics? If you see something wrong in our fics, feel free to let us know politely. If you are rude, we will make a note of what annoyed you and we will feature it prominently in our following fics until you (or someone nicer than you) asks nicely for us to change it. If it is a trigger we won’t do that, obviously, but we will do our best to tag so that doesn’t happen. Don’t read things if they have a trigger warning for something that triggers you. I shouldn’t have to say it, yet here we are. If you dislike the characterization, we can open up a dialogue and maybe we’ll write you one with a characterization that you prefer. Or maybe we’ll tell you to shove it. Depends on how things go. If you dislike the things we write about (e.g. Death Eaters from Harry Potter), then don’t f***ing read that fic. Blacklist it, whatever. We know why and how they are problematic, we just dgaf. It’s for fun.

Why don’t you have a masterlist/other Tumblr things? We are new to this whole writing thing, Midnight to Tumblr in general, and Serpentine has never written her own post before, so be patient. We are learning this whole thing as we go, and it was meant as more of an experiment than a job anyway. We will do our best to make a masterlist and make the blog easy to search, but it has a learning curve, so don’t be surprised if we don’t manage right away (or ever)

Do you have a tag list? We could try?

How often do you update? Depends on how much love and attention we get. If we get a lot of requests, we’ll be doing a lot of writing, Real Life™ allowing.

Can I reblog? If you make sure our names are still on it, you do what you like, my guy.

Can I tag you in things? Can I give you an internet hug? Ofc. Remember what I said about attention?

Can I message you? If it is for requests, we’d prefer you keep it in the asks, but if you wanna say something, then sure. Keep it PG for Serpentine’s virgin eyes tho. (Serpentine can deal with it, don’t be a wuss - Midnight) (You’re a wanker - Serpentine)

What don’t you write? Incest, non-con, A/B/O (bc Midnight will die), m-preg, underage anything ever, etc. Just keep it level guys. Don’t make it weird.

What happens with any original fiction that you post? I won’t post much of it, and it won’t be anything that I ever have intentions on making into A Thing™ so it’s basically just like our fanfics, go ahead and reblog if you feel just keep our names attached. Also, try not to write anything based off of it or anything like that, but if it sparks something, you do you. We’re reasonably chill until you’re a dick. (Then we’re chillier than a frost giant’s cold shoulder - Midnight)

What happens if I want to be a prick about your writing while on anon? Come at me, bro.

What types of requests do you take? We’re going to try to have a prompts list, or borrow some from fellow writing accounts that are okay with others using their lists, but prompts that you come up with are definitely great! Imagines, multi-chap fics, one-shots, drabbles, headcanons, it’s all fair game.

Serpentine

Name/Nickname: Serpentine, Holly, Andy

Age: 18

Pronouns: she/her/My Lady

How would you describe yourself: I would not

Are requests open: Yes

What do you like writing most: Fluff. I love it when everyone is peaceful.

What do you like writing least: Character bashing. Sometimes I have to for the sake of the plot, but it hurts.

Who do you write for: Marvel - Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers, Tony Stark, Loki, Thor, Dr. Strange, Clint Barton, Pietro Maximoff (he didn’t die hmmm nope), Frank Castle (Jon Bernthal only), Brock Rumlow (don’t say anything Midnight, I know he’s a dick, leave me alone), Anatoly Ranskahov, Vladimir Ranskahov. Harry Potter - Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Charlie Weasley, Fred Weasley, George Weasley, Draco Malfoy, Antonin Dolohov, Thorfinn Rowle, Rodolphus Lestrange (although I characterize him as fatherly more than anything), Rabastan Lestrange (although don’t expect mental stability), Fenrir Greyback, Corban Yaxley, Evan Rosier, Lucius Malfoy (if we go AU), Lucissa (Narcissa Black nee Malfoy + Lucius Malfoy), Theodore Nott, Blaise Zabini, Regulus Black, Jily (James + Lily), Sily (which is my take on Sirius + Lily, though mostly they are platonic sometimes I think hmm). I have a lot of my own personal headcanons for nearly all of these characters because I have spent many years of my life ‘living’ in the Wizarding World when I should have been doing my homework, so if something doesn’t vibe for you, I apologise, but I am very specific about my Harry Potter.

POV & Other Characters: These can be OC or reader, platonic and romantic or unpaired accepted. For Harry Potter, I can also write them as Hermione Granger (like most HP fics are tbh). As for other characters, it’s all negotiable, but with Harry Potter fandom Slytherin characters are much more likely to get the OK bc I’m House biased (Go Snakes). The ones marked as couples are only written as couples, so don’t try to make me pair dear James Potter with anyone other than his Lily.

How long does it take to write a request: If I’m inspired, maybe an hour or two. Now when I post it...

Open to ask memes: Absolutely the hell yes. I love talking about myself.

Special Rules: I do not write smut (yet, bc I am innocent in the ways of the flesh), but I will yeet those to Midnight and I’ll do my best to take any other requests and if y’all wanna drop nasty imagines into the ask box or something, we’re all ears (eyes?). I will write poly ships, though again I reserve the right to decide how (e.g. M/M or nah) and there will be no sin.

Midnight

1. Name/Nickname: Midnight, Kai, (Barnes)

2. Age: 19

3. Pronouns: she/her/Soldat

4. How would you describe yourself: I... am basically a less intimidating Winter Soldier (memory problems, depression, anxiety) and an MCU genderbent Loki because I can be a sneaky little shit

5. Are requests open: YEET

6. What do you like writing most: Fluff. Any time I get to make scary assassins do domestic things... I am there for that

7. What do you like writing least: Death. Why y’all gotta do me dirty like that? There’s more than enough in the MCU alone guys. Can’t we just pretend we live in the Everybody Lives AU?

8. Who do you write for: Marvel - Loki Odinson, Thor Odinson, Tony Stark, Doctor Stephen Strange, Bucky Barnes, Peter Quill, Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanov, T’Challa, Peter Parker (aged up), Pietro Maximoff, Wade Wilson (Deadpool), Gamora DC - Jason Todd, Bruce Wayne, Diana Prince, Clark Kent, Connor Kent, Dick Grayson, Steve Trevor, Tim Drake, Wally West, Barry Allen, Harley Quinn, Poison Ivy, Catwoman, Damian Wayne (aged up), Kaldur’ahm, Jaime Reyes, Bart Allen (aged up), Roy Harper (if you want YJ’s Red Arrow, please specify, otherwise my default is Arsenal), Hal Jordan Assassin’s Creed - Altair, Ezio

9. POV & other characters: I prefer reader inserts, however, if you would like an OC I would recommend naming the OC with a nickname so it makes it nicer for other readers to enjoy it. I will do specific ships if I ship them or I know enough about the ship. (eg WonderTrevor, SuperWonder, Stony, Stucky, IronStrange etc) I am also pretty okay with writing smut, but I may not be able to for specific characters/ships due to lack of experience in writing the sin, lol. (and yes, I will take your smut requests for Serpentine’s characters, and work with her to achieve the correct characterization, so long as time permits us to work on it in a timely fashion)

10. How long does it take to write a request: Depends on how busy I am, the alignment of the stars, the weather… jk, in truth, I can be very busy and also have to manage my own health so it can be from a half hour (if I’m really inspired) to up to a week or two. (I will try my best to turn out work in a decent time though, and if I have to ask Serpentine for help I will)

11. Special Rules: Already covered, I guess? Just bear with me on getting things out on time.

Please note; most of this was written by Serpentine at 3 am, I (Midnight), only wrote my own FAQs, also at 3 am. If none of this makes sense, that would be why. Serpentine rarely makes sense without supervision, so feel free to ask for clarification if the wording is awkward.

#da faq #serpentine #midnight #guidelines #rules #tag you're it #writing

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derrickperegrine · 7 years

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shadows of memory, shades of being

@hpwritersnet: minerva mcgonagall

la vie n'est qu'une longue perte de tout ce qu'on aime. - victor hugo, l’homme qui rit

4,634 words

read on AO3

Cuthbert Binns, professor of History of Magic at Hogwarts, once said that ‘Memory, is just the ghost of history.’ Of course, this may have been an absentminded response to the question ‘Professor Binns, are you aware that you’re a ghost?’, but Minerva felt that Binns' words haunted her long after he said it, in these troubled and disturbed times. For happening simultaneously in her life was one of the greatest calamities of wizarding history and a period of the most profound loss in her life. Indeed, though history passed her by, the ghosts of these times still haunt her present and past. Sometimes, it feels like her life is so full of ghosts that there isn't much else left.

He was a sensible boy, with black hair that was neat in the morning but invariably fell into his face by the end of the day, and soft, reasonable grey eyes that betrayed kindness and hopefulness despite his outward coldness and reticence. It shocked her at first when it was revealed that he had joined the Death Eaters, as she had never understood how much his desperate idealism clouded his judgment of the facts at hand. She had wondered if perhaps Walburga and Orion Black had influenced him to make the decision, but Minerva knew that Regulus Black was just as wilful and stubborn as his older brother - perhaps even more so. He wasn't a bad person, but Minerva found it difficult to forgive his involvement with Voldemort and his cohorts; but still, eighteen is too young for anyone to die. He still had time to turn away, to live out his potential. And boy did he have potential. One of the most intuitive wizards that she'd ever taught. He deserved to live a better life. The worst part of Regulus Black's death was witnessing what it did to Sirius - he had never given up hope that his brother might come back to him, and the concrete loss of this hope had turned Sirius a harder, colder, and less talkative man. It would be years before she would see him as his old, chatty self again.

‘My son was just born, I’m a father now!’ Minerva remembered this young man beaming and showing her a photograph of a laughing baby with a head full of poofy black hair. ‘His name is Dean,’ he told her proudly. It was strange how quickly her students all became adults and parents, when only a few years ago they were still her pupils, studying for their N.E.W.T.s and fretting about future jobs. She had bumped into him in the Three Broomsticks, and wouldn’t have recognised him if that familiar voice hadn’t exclaimed, ‘Professor McGonagall!’ upon seeing her. She was very glad to have seen him, and told him that she looked forward to teacher his son when he came to Hogwarts. She bid him farewell, and told him that she hoped to see him again, soon. Now she wish she hadn’t said that. A week later, news of his murder had reached her, and Albus had explained that Voldemort had killed him for refusing to join the Death Eaters. The young man had abandoned his Muggle wife and son to keep them safe, before trying to disappear into Ireland. But they had got to him in the end. Minerva found herself thinking about poor little Dean. She hadn’t forgotten about that poor child ever, and eleven years later when the young Dean Thomas came to Hogwarts, she wondered if he knew about the story of his birth father, and if he knew how much he had looked like him.

Edgar Bones was a good man. She had met him briefly when Albus first invited her to join the Order of the Phoenix. He was polite, warm, and even tried to joke with her, although at that time she was not in the mood. At the end, she had decided to spy for the Ministry instead of joining the Order, but she did not forget Edgar Bones and how he tried to introduce laughter and happiness in the midst of this terrible war. And when news reported that he and his family had been killed by Voldemort, Minerva found herself feeling suddenly very cold and dark, as if a great light had gone out of the universe.

Minerva remembered her as a student that was sometimes more trouble than she was worth. She never wore her uniform properly, never sat up straight in class, and had buzzed all of her brown hair to the scalp. Many people remembered James Potter and Sirius Black as the unruliest students of Hogwarts in the ‘70s, but the truth was they were nothing next to Marlene McKinnon. Minerva remembered Marlene as a particularly spirited girl who was always talking of a revolution, of a rebellion against the status quo. Marlene McKinnon was never satisfied, always hungry for change, and always hopeful for improvement. She was the biggest dreamer Minerva had ever met, and she had the craziest ideas that seemed like they just might work. Minerva often found herself quite appreciative of the quirky genius of Marlene McKinnon. When she learned of Marlene’s murder, she found herself becoming hard and unmovable, in order to find the courage to face her classroom every morning. Marlene had been her favourite student. Will teaching ever feel the same again?

People often said that twins were particularly intuitive towards each other. This was certainly true of Fabian and Gideon Prewett. They weren’t the type of twins that were never seen without the other - in fact, Fabian and Gideon had rather different interests, and often attended different classes - but when they were together, it seemed like they could read each other’s minds. One would always have a goblet of pumpkin juice ready before the other had even realised that he was thirsty, and so on. This connection made them particularly fierce duelists, as one would always know which spell the other one needed. So when they fell under the wandfire of Death Eaters, Minerva found it difficult to believe. When one sees how fiercely fire can blaze, it can be difficult to imagine how it could ever go out. She hoped that Fabian and Gideon’s fire wouldn’t extinguish with their deaths, and instead be manifested elsewhere. This wish of hers did come true - when their sister’s sons, Fred and George Weasley, came to Hogwarts, Minerva saw the fires of one F & G reflected in the eyes and hair of the other. Some things you just can’t kill.

Minerva never knew that much about Benjy Fenwick. In class, he was a quiet and adequate student, and did not draw much attention to himself. And the one time she visited the Order, he never talked except to voice his opinion on a certain mission. Yet still, the brutality of his death shook her, and reminded her that evil is realer and closer than you could ever imagine.

One was never seen without the other. Wherever Marlene McKinnon went, so did Dorcas Meadowes. And just as Marlene was rebellious and caustic, Dorcas was cunning and ingenious (a true Slytherin). Together they were unstoppable, and the terror of professors all over Hogwarts. While Marlene dreamed of change, Dorcas dreamed of escape. Minerva could see it in her eyes, that faraway look that no doubt harboured untaken adventures and future heroics. Needless to say, she wasn’t shocked when Dorcas had joined the Order. It seemed to be a good fit for her, giving her a taste for adventure as she fought the good fight. And it seemed that Dorcas would survive, as she knew how to lie low (in every one of their pranks, Marlene had always been the one to get caught redhanded, whilst Dorcas would have known better to clean up after herself). Her death left a bad taste in Minerva’s mouth; as now she knew that no matter how clever you were, the dark would always be there to wait you out. At least Dorcas went down fighting Voldemort personally, Minerva thought, and she felt very proud of that.

Evan Rosier was never a nice boy, and so when Alastor Moody killed him Minerva did not really feel much. But somehow, because he was a human and she had known him as a student, it seemed like she had to at least feel a little pity or, even dislike for the Death Eater. But she found that she hadn’t been able to feel anything. It seemed like something had died in her a while ago.

Sometimes, there are things that are so good that you tell yourself, they’re going to last forever, even though you know you shouldn’t set yourself up like that. But sometimes, you see something so perfect that it just doesn’t make sense that one day it’ll be gone, because it doesn’t make sense to destroy something so precious, even if you could have seen the end coming. Minerva was not surprised when James Potter and Lily Evans were murdered, as they were vocal opponents of Voldemort and the Death Eaters and prominent members of the Order; but still she felt an incredulity at their loss, as if she could not imagine a world without the two of them. No, she couldn’t remember a world like that. But here they were, lying in a broken house, and everything seemed unreal. Everything was unreal - Voldemort was momentarily defeated, James and Lily were dead, and their son had survived. Survived Voldemort. Minerva remembered picking him up, looking at him, and seeing his father in his brown skin and black hair, seeing his mother in his green eyes and intelligent mouth. James and Lily were gone and this was all of them that was left in this world, alive. Why did Albus Dumbledore always guide her favourite students towards danger and almost certain death? ‘I won’t let him take you,’ she found herself saying to Harry, but she was unsure who she was talking about. But she was certain that Harry, would live. She would fight anyone to keep him alive.

Voldemort had gone for so long that so many had forgotten that he was still a very real threat. Many had forgotten about the war in the beginning, and even more had believed that one could not survive vaporisation (a logical conclusion). But he did come back, fourteen years later. She believed that he was coming back soon, but it only felt real when she saw Harry fly out of the maze with the body of Cedric Diggory. It only felt like a real attack and a declaration of war when she saw Harry sobbing over the body of Cedric Diggory, all wrong and soft the way a human body shouldn’t be. Voldemort left taking some of her favourite children, and now he’s come back taken another one of hers. Cedric. How could he have taken Cedric? Cedric Diggory, the kindest, the truest, the most worthy of them all. Cedric Diggory, perhaps the most promising wizard of the age. Cedric Diggory, the boy who followed her like a shadow when he was younger, with never-ending questions that seemed far too old for his age; Cedric Diggory, who played Quidditch like the wind and made her wish that he was sorted into Gryffindor instead, so he could be on her team; Cedric Diggory, the greatest friend it seemed like anyone could have, who would always have your back, through thick and thin, without complaint, without conditions. Cedric Diggory, who deserved to die the least. Cedric Diggory, who deserved to live. She found herself still staring at his body. Harry looked up and caught her eye, and that’s when she’d noticed that Voldemort hadn’t taken one. He’d taken two. He’d taken Harry, too.

Broderick Bode was found dead at St. Mungo’s, strangled with Devil’s Snare. He was killed for knowing about the Death Eater’s plans with stealing the Prophecy. And she knew that they were going to kill her boy, Harry. They were going to kill Harry.

And Harry only had her left in the world. Because death is blind, death is hungry, death is tenacious - death kills no matter who you are, no matter what you fight for, no matter what you live for. Because death is back in her life again, after so many years. Because death took Harry’s godfather, Sirius Black. Because death took this man she’s finally seen smile, for the first time, in over fifteen years; because death took this man whose soul has already been killed so many times, that it’s a miracle he’s still holding on; because death took the Order’s fiercest warrior. Because death took her boy, with long black hair that followed him like a shadow and eyes glinting grey (which she has come to know as the colour of trouble); her boy, with a lopsided smile that always hinted at something vaguely illegal, a smile that she loved and hated equally; her boy, with a personality like water (it gets everywhere), a mind like the wind (never know where it’s gone now), a spirit like fire (infectious). At least he’s with James now, she finds herself saying to herself, at least he’s with James now. At least she’s with Regulus now. Sirius Black is no longer alone. She looks at Harry, staring dead-eyed out of a window, unmoving. Harry, is all alone. But at least he’s still got her.

Most people are right not to trust the government. A lot of people who are in power indeed ascended to their position through family ties, riches, and intimidation. However, it is worth remembering that there are still fair, true, and deserving people who serve witches and wizards across the world. Madame Amelia Bones was one such person. She was perhaps the best person you could ever have in a government, and Minerva had respected her a lot. When she was taken, Minerva lost her hope in the government and cut ties with the Ministry.

Diagon Alley feels strange and unwelcoming now, with Florean Fortescue’s Ice Cream Parlour boarded up and dusty. Walking past the window, Minerva looked in and saw broken chairs and upturned tables, splashes of dried ice cream on the floor, and a smudge of what look suspiciously like blood on the wall. Florean had disappeared, but judging by the state of his parlour there was no doubt that he had been killed. Minerva had always thought of him as a sweet man, and Hagrid had always spoken fondly of the gentleman as one of his closest friends. Minerva always frequented his parlour whenever she was in Diagon, and they would trade stories of the children who visited his parlour and the children who attended her classes (clearly, the two overlapped greatly). He was warm and friendly, and would always give her surprisingly insightful and helpful tips for dealing with children. Looking back, it seemed like he had always been her greatest supporter and collaborator. Without his help, it’s hard to see how she would have survived her first few years of teaching. Now he’s gone, and she hadn’t even had a proper chance to tell him how much she appreciated him. Now, so many people have gone, and so many sentiments had gone unsaid. Minerva turned around and walked away from the parlour.

Emmeline Vance, the toughest character Minerva had ever met, had succumbed. It seemed hardly possible at the moment, but then Minerva had experienced so many deaths in the past two decades that no death was surprising anymore. Harry was caught saying, ‘And anyway, life’s too short... look at Madame Bones, look at Emmeline Vance... it could be me next, couldn’t it?’ and Minerva found herself agreeing with Harry. Indeed, the noose is tightening around everyone. But Harry would not be next. Emmeline pledged her life that he wouldn’t be next. Minerva had done the same. Harry would have to live.

Hannah Abbott’s mother had been taken. Seeing on Hannah’s face the strange pain of losing someone so close for the first time, Minerva was reminded of the many times she’s experienced that pain, and so much that it wasn’t even strange anymore; but it was never not painful. She thought of all those who had died in her life, and wondered - who was left now? She could count those close to her on one hand. It was a terrifying and sobering thought. How much of her love and thought was spent on those already too far gone to experience it? How many important parts and persons from her life had been carved away? And what was left of her now? Who was she now? Minerva McGonagall, witch, professor, friend, mentor, confidant, guardian ...

Minerva read in the news that a young Montgomery had died as a result of a werewolf attack lead by Fenrir Greyback. His mother had refused to join the Death Eaters. He had two sisters in Hogwarts. She could have taught him in six years’ time. How many people in her future had also become ghosts of the past?

She had rushed over just in time to see that flash of green so bright and unnatural that it hurt, and a billowing of grey robes and hair, and then nothingness. Just empty space and dark night. The Malfoy boy was sitting on the cold marble floor, his face pale face sallow in the candlelight and his eyes hollow with relief. A relief that is neither freeing nor glad. Just a dead, tired, sort of relief that was perhaps not relief at all. He held his own wand tightly in one hand, and Albus’ wand was by his other hand, on the floor. Although Minerva herself discounted divination, the image brought to mind two cards that Sybill had been looking at the other day, from across the professor’s banquet table. She looked at Malfoy’s nervous hand now. The Two of Wands. Fear of the unknown. She looked at Albus’ wand on the floor. The Ace of Wands. Delayed. Dead. ‘Minerva?’ Severus turned to her, his wand still glowing green from his deed. His cloak billowed behind him like a dark cloud, obscuring the present. ‘Minerva, take the children.’ She straightened herself up best she could, and looked at her students. They looked back at her, but they weren’t looking at her. All their eyes were disbelieving, scared, worried, sad (oh, some of them were crying), angry, betrayed - ‘Students, please, to your dorms. Now.’ They shuffled out, and Minerva walked over to help the young Malfoy up. He was so unexpectedly light in her arms. He seemed like an excuse for a boy who was already almost a man. Before she left with Malfoy, she turned back and looked at that window. Albus Dumbledore, has fallen.

Severus would not tell her what had happened to Professor Charity Burbage, and so that way Minerva had an idea of what had happened. They were coming after the professors now. After all these years, they’re finally coming after her. She cannot protect Harry now.

Alastor Moody was killed in the wandfire, protecting Harry whilst they moved him out of 4 Privet Drive. The hunt for the boy had begun, and they were already so, so outnumbered. Those who could still fight were so, so young - too young to be fighting. It almost seemed like they wouldn’t be enough; but they’re all she’s got now. They’re all Harry’s got. She cannot protect Harry now, but Merlin she hopes they’ll be able to protect him.

Minerva watched as bodies of her students and friends were carried past her into the Great Hall. Her world was crumbling around her, and she thought, this is how it ends, the last parts of me struggling against the oncoming barrage. She feels the castle’s power coursing through her as she raises her arms to the sky, bursting with stars of strange colours. Her fists are stone and her wand is a blazing sword. Her soldiers march forth, armoured in that castle she loved so much, the home of all of her ghosts and memories. Her home. She watches as two students - Dean Thomas and a Slytherin whose face she couldn’t make out - zip past her with a stretcher. She couldn’t mistake that face ever. Remus Lupin. She didn’t expect to see him, and the image brought a terrifying confusion to her mind. He had just welcomed a son - just like Dean Thomas’ father did, eighteen years ago. Just as James and Lily did. Minerva thought that he had known better - and Merlin’s beard, he’s Remus fucking Lupin, he should know better - than to do this to his son. He’s seen what this has done to Harry. But, he still! He still left Teddy to fight. And now he’s dead. They’re all dead. She deflected a curse from a Death Eater, and a shower of red sparks rained over her. Of course Remus fucking Lupin went ahead and died - despite his appearances, he’s never been a very prudent or sensible boy. You couldn’t be sensible and still be James and Sirius’ best friend. No, he was always jumping headfirst into situations and conclusions without thinking too much, more instinct-driven than reason-driven. He was always more volatile than people expected, full of challenge and defiance. He had been taught to keep his head down and live quietly, but living with James and Sirius taught him that he had a right to live by his own way, had a right to anger, had a right to rise up, and stop being trodden on. And that had taught him loyalty, and he was fiercely loyal to James and Sirius, always jumping in front of them into certain danger, always taking the blame, always ready to protect (and tired of hurting). Fat load of good that did him, Remus fucking Lupin. Fat load of good that did them all.

It was all happening so quickly. Two Ravenclaws rushed past with a mauled body, but Minerva recognised the bracelet on its wrist as one belonging to a Lavender Brown. She choked back bile and turned away from whatever remained of the girl (she didn’t deserve this, no one deserves this) and retrained her eyes at the battlefield. The air was arid with smoke and dust, and the night was bleary with the light of spells. It was difficult to see anything, but she wasn’t about to chance anything by firing blindly into the foggy landscape. She conjured a wind and blew away the dust, just in time to see a Death Eater fire a curse towards the castle, and a tumble of stone bringing dust back into the air. There was a yell and she rushed over to the rubble and begun digging with her bare hands, Merlin knows where her wand went. The stone was rough and heavy beneath her fingers, but she didn’t care. Another set of hands joined her, and together they dug. It was a miracle that no one had hit them, and so she had assumed that someone was providing cover for them. She threw away another rock, and she saw. It was Fred Weasley. She made an ugly sound that surprised herself. She turned to the other person and saw George Weasley. Of course it was George Weasley. One was never seen without the other. He looked at her too, and his eyes were full of tears but also empty with confusion. When so much of who you are has been carved away, what are you anymore?

She saw Horace Slughorn and Pomona Sprout carrying a small body over to the great door. Pomona was bubbling with sobs and could barely carry the body; Horace was doing all he could to keep it above the ground. Minerva saw that shock of bubblegum-pink hair and knew that Nymphadora Tonks was dead. They disappeared into the Great Hall, and Horace came out alone. He made eye contact with Minerva, and disappeared back into the battle. Pomona’s howl stirred a familiar sadness and anger that had been in Minerva for far too long. She too, had lost far too many students as well.

Colin Creevey passed her by, without a camera, for the first time. It was a strange sight, but she’d thought that, for the first time, she didn’t want to see what sort of pictures he’d taken. She didn’t think she could bear to witness the last thing he saw before he’d been killed.

The light had broken, and Hogwarts was red and grey instead of black and brown as usual. She sauntered into the castle, exhausted from using wandless magic for so long. Sybill took her place. For all her misgivings towards divination, Minerva had to admit (and she gladly did) that Sybill was a far more skilled witch than most have given her credit for. 'Go to the Shrieking Shack,’ Sybill told her without any explanation. Well, if she was going to believe Sybill at any time, might as well be this time. Minerva moved cautiously over, pushed knot at the bottom of the ruined Whomping Willow. The door opened for her, and she ducked inside. Lying on the floor was the dead body of Severus Snape. So at the end, being a Death Eater couldn’t protect him from Voldemort after all. She stood over his corpse and looked at his pale, dead face. When so much of who you are has been carved away, what are you anymore? It seemed like Severus had let that loss dictate his entire life, and Minerva did not find that intelligent or heroic at all. Instead, it was a cowardly life, one led by a person too scared to face a future not to their liking. She never liked Severus, as he was never a pleasant man nor a good teacher, but at least he had protected Harry even when Albus was ready to sacrifice the boy. At least he defended Harry, however unworthy his personal reasons were. But would that ever be enough? Would that be enough to define who Severus Snape was as a person? Would that make him a hero? Or would he remain the coward that he is?

Sybill found her, still standing over Severus Snape’s body. ‘Come,’ she said, and Minerva followed her to the gates of the school. Everyone was gathered there, watching the Forbidden Forest. She turned her attention there, too, unquestioningly, but she had a faint idea of what might have happened. Hagrid stepped out of the shadows of the trees. It was a familiar sight. It was as if she’d seen this sight sometime before, seventeen years ago. Hagrid was carrying a small figure in his arms. Hagrid was carrying Harry in his arms. Her Harry. They had taken him. A rage swelled up inside her, a rage so tall that it threatened to fill up this vast hole of loss in her that just kept swallowing more and more of her, until there was nothing left but loss. They had taken the Boy Who Lived, the Boy Who Will Live, the Boy Who Must Live. They had taken her boy.

They had taken everyone she had. They had taken everything she had. They had taken all of her. Minerva McGonagall saw her wand lying by her feet, as if by serendipity. With the swoop of an eagle she snatched it up and held it towards Voldemort, the man who had taken everything from her. She snarled like an alley cat who had nothing to lose, and let all that she had left - anger, grief, love - fill her wand, until the tip glowed and there was nothing left in her at all. They had taken all of her. Now they will pay for it all.

#hpwritersnet #minerva mcgonagall #saladstuff #saladfic #hp fanfiction #swearfam #padfootdsfam #reb's gang #framframfanfan #chloeslilfam #soRRY THIS IS SO LATE SHIT #and like probably too long rip #i'll finish the other prompts i've missed too if that's alright

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