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readymades2002 · 5 years

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AUGH i could make a million posts abt this fhsfkjdfs i took some notes on what i did remember in between everything ill collect those now

jimmy had striped socks on and it was STUPIDLy endearing...............i love u they were SO peppy and jaunty!!! their HOPS...their DANCING...their VIBES..........SMORCH

they also have a sticker of themself on their keyboard stand! queen of self esteem

mcbc just went "JIMMY!!!!! :D" in the middle of a good sax solo I think and wandered over to admire them, and to hold his mic off to the side of their sax since they already have a sax mic but he had to make REAL sure you could appreciate their skills.... they also did the 360 hug for hey homies it was VERY cute im Bad Up To My Nonsense appawently

they DID fight a demonic minion and the Poodle People and jimmy straight up irish whipped mcbc into a bunch of dog people THANKS babe!!!!!! they were also throwing towels after the Weird Dogs when they were vanquished they’re doing their FUCKING best

mcbc leapt off the stage during that fight for reasons incomprehensible to me, perhaps the panache of it all, or the adrenaline, and jimmy had to come over and help him back up onstage goofy........IDIOTS......

while mcbc was hanging out with the crowd, someone asked if he could give this high five to Jimmy and then high fives him, and jimmy came closer and accepted the high five but also knelt down to high five her themself................ I'm soft, i AM soft, let it never be said i wasnt soft

THEY PLAYED YOUR LOVE IT'S FINALLY RICKY'S BIRTHDAY AGAIN...... my sibling bruised my arm when we realized what they were building to...mcbc was like “aint he cute!!!” afterwards and later had a moment of going “hey so why is ricky the best drummer on the planet actually” AWH...

"i stand up to bullies every day. especially you, commander" - ricky, canonically

mcbc corpsed a LOT he had a great time! we had a few Moments bc I was in the front row and he was very smiley and when I got too excited and had to giggle and cover my face he noticed and was very cool about it... love him thank u autistic rights

crashes cousin smash/Phil Din/I BELIEVE chainsaw was filling in for him tonight as he has been on this tour! jimmy kept pointing at him and nodding impressedly during the basslines esp the ICONIC super show one it was sweet. also if you havent listened to the super show theme in a bit go listen to it and pay attention to the bassline because it fucks

he brought a message from crash, also, and it was just Groove Is In The Heart and it was a treat. thanks chainsaw probably and thank you crash i miss you and love u Mwa

JIMMY DID THE SLIDE WHISTLE NOISES FOR GROOVE IS IN THE HEART ACTUALLY HER RANGE...........AUGH im gonna pass out im so in l*ve

they got TWO of the pizza inflatables back on stage before The CHild Throwing and jimmy got to hold both of them for a bit and they were just engulfed by pizza im gonna blow up i love them so fucking much

(mcbc voice) george lucas pizza body :\ (jimmy singing back) george lucas pizza body~

mcbc was discussing with the gal theyd called onstage for the Throwing Of The Children (who had already been taken onstage and gotten sharpie on her face as the opening band chose her as their new leader and was thus a little too freaked out for this, which mcbc was very kind about and very crossly told her parents telling her to just do it to Back Off before letting her go back and bringing up someone else) and asked if she'd like to go first or second and made EXPLICITLY clear that she will have a choice in this matter! she declined to go first and then mcbc nods, turns to the boy who will also be crowdsurfing, and very flatly tells him he does not have a choice GEE.....THANKS, /DAD/

(mcbc voice) i am going to throw you, onto that piece of pizza. (boy voice) - (boy voice) 0_0? (mcbc voice) AND THE CROWD IS GOING TO CATCH YOU

THEY PLAYED LOOK AT ME IM A WINNER /AND/ DOIN SCIENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND THE EXTENDED VERSION OF SHOWTIME THAT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE I COULD DO ANYTHING GGGHGHGH LOVE THAT FOR THEM

THEY ALSO PLAYED CHEMICAL BOMB IN 2019 WHICH I STILL CANT FUCKING BELIEVE HAPPENED GHGKJFGUUUUUU.......jimmy was very quietly doing the “maaaaayyyyybeee”s after the song was over and im just *swoons softly* i AM soft god dont look at me. god. god i love this fucking stupid band so much

eaglebones was VERY cheeky tonight! Mischievous! he kept going >:) and sticking his tongue out and he was having fun im glad i love u bastard fool

this WAS foolish too bc mcbc helped eaglebones hit a beach ball using his guitar as a bat twice and he almost knocked one of the lights down doing it fhdsjkds he was like AAAAYUUUUGHHH after it happened GOOFY. GOOFASS. FIVE LAWSUITS WALKING

at one point I looked away for five seconds and looked back and saw mcbc tumbling out of the audience back in front of the stage completely on his back like a pill bug, absolute madman

mcbc was actually talking abt how they used to have a trampoline onstage for pool party so the kids could party on it but THEN a legal happened -_- *this was a joke dont worry they have done MUCH more wild stuff than that*

“america, land of lawsuits :(”- mcbc, 2019

everyone in this band (mcbc don't look) is so FUCKING talented its bonkers HONESTLY LIKE MCBC TOO TRULY he isnt TALENTED talented but he just like....GOES for it and he is so weird and dramatic and hammy its genuinely a big inspiration but everyone else in this band is so fucking good at what they do i LOVE that for them

lichrally as soon as the concert was over and they started taking the stage down i started crying fhdkjds my mom and sib came back from the merch tables and were like HUH?!?!?!?!?! and i had to be cool about it but like I WAS JUST...BAWLING mom was all “you REALLY like seeing them huh???” and i was like “*autistically* y-yea :’|”

IT WAS..........WONDERFUL. I.....................................................LOVE BAND

#WILL TO LIVE: RESTORED #bat tag #long post -#its been over a decade since they last played in idaho and like #moving from california i really really thought i was never gonna see them again so it was. yknow. a lot. a lot to feel!#I LOVE THEM I REALLY FUCKING DO........................NNOT TO BE CRINGE OR ANYTHING BUT IM BIG...ENAMORED #IM REALLY HAPPY ABOUT IT. IM GLAD. IT WAS GOOD I HAD FUN

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inkstainedfanfics · 7 years

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Update

Drabble Night: I have gotten through just a little over half of the drabbles y’all sent in last Sunday. I will continue working on the last ten this week and post two a night along with a full fic. That way, come the weekend, I will be caught up on those. If you’re wondering if I still have your request, I’ll post them under a read more!

Requests: So as of right now, I have 56 fic requests. The following characters each have one request: Dean W, Hook, Graves, Credence, Lupin, and Sirius. Cedric has two, and the rest are NewtxReader. 56 is a much higher number than I ever expected, so thank you all for your support and kind comments on everything I’ve posted so far. Please know that I will get to your request, and I apologize for any length of time you have to wait.

Sequels: Today I’m going to go through and outline a lot of future works (which might mean no posting tonight), so hopefully I will be able to return to Sequels Saturday and Sundays this coming weekend. I have seven sequels in the works. One of them is a series, the others are just simple sequels. I’ll do the series after the rest.

Thank you, everyone, for reading my works and commenting and sending me such sweet messages. They’re honestly the best and you guys are the greatest. I really mean that. Special thanks to @dont-give-a-bother for listening to me ramble about story ideas and being literally the best (she also posts great gifs of Newt with great captions). Special thanks also to @gemininomad and @babybarryy bc they’re both great writers and they take the time to talk to me?? I’m so honored. If y’all haven’t read their works, you should definitely check them out and follow them bc they’re awesome

That’s my update for the week, so I’ll add the drabble requests now. Have a fantastic day everyone!!

1. Hi, can I have a drabble with bisexual Annabeth Chase x female reader, inspired by the song ‘Runaway Baby’ by Bruno Mars? Annabeth is really proud of her gf when they go out for a formal party with friends, and Percy is low-key jealous? Idk if it makes ANY sense, but yeah 2. Alright Do you think you could do a Tony Stark Drabble where the press makes fun of the reader and he gets protective of her? 3. For Drabble night, may I request a NewtxReader song drabble based on “What Hurts the Most” by Rascal Flatts? Thx! 4. HI I would like to request a Drabble for my dearest, author. Angst angst. Angst. Bc I love your angst. Newt fucks up badly (yells at Reader for not taking care of his animals right? Leaves Reader?) Reader is heartbroken and cries a lot over it. Newt regrets it much but when newt comes to Reader again, she’s happily married? Idk it’s probably too long for a Drabble but U can choose 5. Oh! For Drabble Night, may I request a Newt Scamander x Reader with the dialogue: “Have I gone mad?” “I’m afraid so. You’re entirely bonkers. But I will tell you a secret, All the best people are.” Or “O think I’ve gone around the bend.” Or something along those lines. I thought it would be a nice fluffy drabble:) Thank you!!! 6. Hi hi! Can I request a Fred Weasley fluff drabble?? (If you’re still doing these…) Like maybe smth with cocoa and blankets?? And vv fluffy?? 7. When you have time, can you do a Sam Winchester x Reader drabble? Where you left hunting with the Winchesters a long time ago and like they’re taking a break and Sam drags Dean to a Broadway production like Hamilton or something idk and the reader is the lead female in it? And afterwards Sam waits outside for hours, trying to see her again, and wher she sees him she runs up and kisses him without words? Tysm ❤ ❤ 8. Cullen Rutherford learning Elvish for his Inquisitor 9. I READ YOUR DEAN DRABBLE AND LOVED IT! So I was wondering if you get the time if you would do one where Dean you know comes back from hell and comes searching for you. To find out that you had his child while he was gone and he didnt know you were even pregnant before. Thank you!! 10. hey!! idk if you do Newt Scamander drabbles but can you do one where his gf is really good at drawing and he sees a pic of them together she's drawn & he gets really excited

#not writing #update

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i-never-need-sleep · 7 years

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“Dont know anymore”

The reason behind the comment below was them giving advice to someone dealing with anxiety and depression. I am sharing this here because I know there are people in similar situations that could benefit from some of the points they made. This is not my writing, this was obligatorily stolen from r/offmychest by u/ captLights.

“Hey!

Okay. First things first. You have to calm down yourself. You can't do anything if you're stressed out. Here we go. It's something I recommend a lot around here. Find a quiet spot somewhere. Doesn't have to be your study place. Could be outside if the weather is fair. But it should be quiet and you don't get disturbed. Shut down all digital devices. No laptops. No cellphones. Nothing. You ready? Okay. Sit yourself down. Back straight. Don't slouch. Now, close your eyes. Shift your attention to your breathing. Try to focus on the air passing through your chest. You feel that? Don't change your breathing though. Just try to notice it without changing it. Keep it up. Keep doing that.

Okay. Now, you're mind is going to go bonkers. You won't be able to keep this up. After a minute or two, you're going to be thinking about all the other stuff in your life. But here's the thing. This is a game. Try to be aware of what is happening. Of the thoughts and feelings passing through your head. Instead of engaging with them, just notice that they pass through your brain and then shift your attention back to your breathing. Don't judge, don't feed your fear, don't feed your anxiety. Just notice and shift back to your breathing. Don't get frustrated if you feel you can't keep up. That's normal. Just keep trying.

Now, do this for the next 15 to 30 minutes. Congratulations. You just learned to meditate. You should practice that each and every day. Like, each evening before you go to bed. Or each morning before you get coffee. Your brain is like a muscle. Try to get from 15 minutes to 1 hour. That's a challenge.

Why is this important? Well, we all live in our own minds. We are easily distracted and then we start to ruminate and worry. If you indulge yourself into negative thinking, you're going to foster anxieties and fears and depression. The idea is to not feed those. Through meditation, you learn to become mindful, to become aware of what happens in your head. Of how you feel. And instead of focusing on a single narrative - like you flunking massively, and then going into depression and then going to die - you're going to take a distance of those negative thoughts and you're going to question them.

Seriously.

So. You flunk your exams. Your parents are angry with you. And now you are clueless about your life. And from there, it seems like a short step to death.

Doesn't that sound... a bit over the top? Let's break it down.

Will you automagically die if you fail? Nah. Not really. You'll still be alive. Probably your going have to redo those exams or those courses. Will your parents stay angry? Hmm... they've been angry before, do they stay angry? Nope. They might be disappointed, but that's to be expected. But being angry and disappointed, that's wasted energy. Your parents still love you to bits, they are just worried about you and your future. Summer is coming? Sweet! You had nothing to do? Hm... Why would that be? Did you plan in advance? Did you sit yourself down for an hour and think "what's the top 3 stuff I really want to do in the next few months"? Or were you just idling your time away only to notice afterwards "Fuck, I didn't do anything worthwhile and now I'm here"

Also, exams are like a tennis match. You play several sets. The outcome is determined by how many games and sets you win. Guess what. Tennis is a mental game. If you start losing games, you start to become anxious because you think "can't afford to lose more games, but dammit I've lost already, I'm not doing well, how am I going to win this? Never going to happen! Argh!!" See what I did there? Serena Williams wins because she doesn't think like that. Serena Williams wins because she goes "Lost that last game. Damn. Okay. Nothing I can do about that. But hey, I'm still good. I love doing this. I love my life. Let's see if I can win the next game." Totally different way of thinking. This is POSITIVE thinking compared to NEGATIVE thinking. And that's what makes all the difference in ANYTHING you do in life.

So, you probably fucked up at those last exams. You can't change anything about that. It happened. Don't beat yourself up. You still have work to do. Don't dwell on the past. Use meditative techniques to shift your focus to the present moment. You NEED to study for the next exam. You can DO this. Don't spend energy on whatever is distracting you. Stop worrying. Don't use digital devices. Don't watch television. Don't game. It's you and the book in front of you.

Take care of yourself!! Get in bed on time. Don't stay up late. Get 8 hours of solid shut-eye. You can't function if you don't sleep enough. Stay off the sugared soda's. Drink water. Hydrate regularly. Try to eat healthy stuff. Stay off sugared candy if you can. Sugar messes with your brain. Sugar addiction is a thing and makes you feel miserable. Make sure you get out! Get a 5 minute break after an hour of studying. Go for a walk. Don't stay inside on your chair. Move!! Try to get a routine in your day. Wake up at the same hour, study at the same hours. Be economic with your time! Try to work out twice a week. Go to the gym. Go running. Break a sweat in a sport you find fun and engaging. Exercise takes your mind of difficult stuff for a few hours. You NEED this if you want to keep going.

Remember, this is a marathon, not a sprint. You can't keep sprinting ALL the time. You need to pace. Don't try to cling onto your parents expectations of your studies if you feel you can't meet them. Own up to it and tell them you're in trouble if you feel like your working towards something unattainable. Don't keep pursuing a degree if you feel that this is not something within your own possibilities. Then you'd be only wasting your own precious time.

Do the work instead of thinking about off'ing yourself. That's all it is.

Best of luck!”

This’ll probably go nowhere but hey, never know.

#anxiety #depression #advice #meditation #suicidal mention #in the op that is #just in case #kinda long

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sightofsea · 7 years

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this is rly dumb and there is the HUGE chance im going to regret this but ok

basically when i was 15 i wrote an approx. 200k OC doctor who fanfiction featuring a kind of half self insert/half attempt to subvert mary sue comapnion stereotypes named jenna quigley. and ive been thinking about it more lately like the general storyline bc like. idk. n i figured i should write it out.

i should mention this is all 11th doctor era bc i was a huge fan at that time, and it takes place between that time he leaves amy n rory to when he does his farewell tour bc i wanted to try n add some canonical irony that ill get to later

so basically its all narrated from jenna pov as kind of stories she’s telling to the tardis database via recording. why, we don’t know yet. she;s. ok so in the plot she was from our universe n was an AVID fan of the show which like tacky i know but whatever. she starts out 15 and in basically my house and neighborhood (this fic started from a constant daydream i would have of going on adventures w the doctor bc i was a nerdy 15 yo so like. sue me) and there have been a disturbing amount of disappearances in the surrounding area that local police are stuck on. so everyones kinda afraid to go out into their own homes and at one point, jenna is doing something out in her backyard and actually witnesses one of the abductions, but is surprised to see the kidnapper looks like the silence, aka the television show shes been watching. she thinks shes going bonkers. her family leave her alone for the day to go to a thing for one of her siblings and she’s just kind of ruminating on this event when--lo and behold, an officer arrives at her door.

and jenna, she’s very skeptical about this guy. like, given recent events she doesnt trust her own eyes. and the guy is...off. like his badge n credentials, if she concentrates, looks like something else for a flash of a second, and for some reason the figure of him is kind of hazy whenever jenna tries to look directly at him. he is shown to have a quirky, friendly demeanor n jenna figures well, i gotta tell someone about what ive seen, so she invites him in. they have a brief chat n its obvious to the reader that this guy is someone VERY familiar (mostly due to my bad writing at the time) and jenna begins to explain what she saw and how its like this one show she watches, and this guy suddenly becomes very very interested in this before realizing he’s got it all pieced together and asks for jenna’s help in navigating the area to find what is, ultimately, a silence space ship.

jenna agrees and over time realizes this guy is most definitely connected to something in the whoniverse and originally believes he might be a time agent bc that seems more likely given their number as they travel to the ship. its also revealed that the officer has brought jenna along bc the key thing about what she saw is that she actually remembers the silence and can see past perception filters due to the qualities of alternate universe, slightly alternate brain chemistry and so on. its not exactly perfect--she can’t get through perception filters rly, especially good ones--but its enough to know something is wrong n remember certain things others from the dw universe might not be able to like the actual silence aliens themselves.

anyway they make their way to the ship, which has come through a massive tear in reality that the officer came through. in the fic lore i guess tears are seen as usually benign things meant to leak ideas of universes into other universes as a kind of waste disposal system, and as a side effect create inspiration in those who are close to them. this tear, though, became too big, kind of like a leaky pipe, and actual material was able to get through by keeping a frequency from both ends of the tear as a kind of safety rope. and to maintain their energy as a stranded ship the silence have been using humans as batteries. i put a lot of thought into this, i know.

SO once theyre in the ship the “”officer”” (we know who he is by now lets just face it) and jenna are captured n separated. jenna is held hostage and it is revealed she is a part of a second half of the “silence will fall when the question is asked” prophecy which goes “the unexpected shall follow the guided task” (i loved rhymes) which is further revealed to the be the following: change the timeline and destroy the doctor. and jenna, being jenna, is like “listen u guys i dont even know the guy so uh failed step one i guess”. she’s saved by the “”officer”” in the nick of time through work of faulty electrical work (like? i know its for style but the silence have all those lights on the floor n it is VERY dangerous) so the whole ship is blacked out n she hears the differently pitched speech patterns (”why do u sound all different” “they took my equipment nevermind lets go”) and after doing some work to reverse the frequency and basically make the ship implode back into its original universe they run back to jenna’s home in the dark, seeing as she was out for quite a bit. her family is conveniently not home yet n decided to hang out with some friends. and when she gets back n is finally in the light SURPRISE!!! turns out the officer was the doctor all along in disguise from the silence using a perception filter. 15 year old me was a literary genius.

n u might think hannah this is rly long is it done now and of course it isnt!! that was just the intro!! after the initial shock jenna kind of parses what era the doctor is from, which is pre-silencio but after finding out about it n in that 200 yr stretch that was never rly shown. and jenna’s like, a whole season ahead of him basically and knows all this stuff and is trying to engage with this guy she’s a huge fan of without like accidentally spilling the beans on his future. she sits him down to explain the whole tv show thing n lets him watch an episode while she goes to her room to pack like clothes n her laptop because its not every day the doctor just flies in and she’s 15 so shes like hellz yeah im gonna be a COMPANION not even THINKING of the consequences in terms of the multiverse, the prophecy and her family (she does leave a note but its self centered n kinda lame tbh just like be back whenever). afterwards she walks the doctor back to the tardis and is like so where we gonna go n the doctor looks at her like jenna you are a literal child im not taking you anywhere and jenna though some MASTERY of writing that was basically hey look over there! and doing it anyway sneaks into the tardis when the doctor isnt looking n becomes his stowaway.

for the next few weeks she just kind of chills in the tardis with this fear that the doctor will immediately bring her back home so might as well have fun and kinda sneaks around him and keeps couch hopping from room to room. the tardis does not like her one bit due to the whole different universe funky energies thing (and this was pre-clara and i really wanted to see a companion the tardis didnt like so) and has multiple conversations with it via the interface hologram which meant i could write cameos for classic companions and write the tardis as a character bc i was a nerd.

SO after weeks of casually avoiding the doctor eventually she gets caught by him and hes not happy about it so shes like well ok then send me home n then she gets the real kicker which is the tears all mended up. after the material was put back in place it went back to being benign n too small for anything to travel between. so jenna basically stuck in this foreign universe with a very slim chance of returning back to her old life and her family and friends and she mistakes the doctors anger at the situation for anger at her so shes like basically im all alone here oh god n has a crisis n has a dramatic run off into the bowels of the tardis hallways

eventually the doctor finds her and they bond over being kind of the last of their kind in a way and he takes a kind of fatherly role and is like well youre already here and im miserable on my own so why dont we two birds one stone it n just go on adventures for the time being and takes a kind of fatherly platonic role with jenna bc i was sick of seeing companions hook up with the doctor and was confused as to why they wanted to hook up with him (spoiler alert: huge lesbian)

so they set off on their adventures. the first one was about the doctor and jenna accidentally boarding a ship of genetically engineered soldiers called evos being shipped off to a galactic war and finding out some of them had rebelled and had been camping out in the ships underbelly. they had no mouths but were able to communicate via sign language n empath touch powers of transferable memories. the captain was a bitch who didnt see the evos as living things n eventually in a stand off either offered them a chance for the other, still podded evos to live and for them all to live a horrible life or have the podded evos be ejected into space in return for them to have a chance to fight for their freedom. the choice ended up coming down to jenna, somehow, i think, and she chose freedom and cost the lives of like 200 evos but were able to get the ones they were able to save (about, like, 100 i think) to safety and create their own civilization away from harm on a distant planet and their success and triumph to live their own lives i guess canceled out the fact that jenna played a part in the deaths of 200 beings. it was. i dont even know

the next “episode” after a brief interlude of less impactful adventures and discussing mortality was a sherlock crossover episode that im too embarrassed to go into detail about but did reveal jenna’s newly formed abandonment issues due to her stranded in a strange universe situation and the fact she had a self harm problem that, surprise, mirrored mine. her n the doctor went on some more adventures over the next few months that were mentioned in passing. it should be noted that this first “act” i guess takes place over a solid year

the next episode featured river song bc i was gay for her without knowing it and i had just learned about easter island in history class and i decided to expand on one of the adventures said in passing during the series to kind of root my fic in canon bc i was a smarmy bitch. it involved being perceived as gods and the silence and using the flesh as a means of luring villagers to be used as human batteries and also putting a percetion filter on the ship so what was actually a crater was perceived to be a mountain. through this episode we saw the doctor again facing his own mortality, river sitting jenna down after a series of events pieced together her abandonment issues n harm problem n being like you cant rely on the doctor for this alone trust me i know its fun but when it starts ending it wont be. jenna gets kidnapped again by the silence n is reproduced as flesh to try and steer the doctor n river away from saving the day but overcomes that impulse and eventually pulls herself out of it and helps save things.

this episode also imports an important plot device of misplacement, which i shouldve put in earlier if im honest. the basic idea of it, within the fic lore, was that the universe, multiverse, whatever had to compensate for temporal displacement all the time when choices were made, but when big things that would alter history happened--like a giant supposed mountain blowing up 200 years after it had already blew up--it had a fail safe to transport the object causing the harm to the exact place but in a different time where the event would have less of a temporal impact. theres also an important note here where the doctor doesnt recall jenna being with him on their first adventure together. both are setting up the larger plot.

after the deal with the kidnapping and the flesh and all their adventures the doctor becomes kind of protective of jenna because i mean the dude also has abandonment issues like lets be real. so he kind of tones down the danger in fear of jenna dying or getting hurt. i mean, its been a year and theyve kind of become these friends who snark at each other like a family would and its nice that jenna has this person she can trust because she watched the show and like, knows him and knows his tells and calls him out on his bullshit before he can even get started and feels a kind of responsibility for due to the prophecy she was given and the doctor has someone to talk to and someone he also doesnt have to hide from really because she already knows almost everything. theyve been equally protective of each other--jenna keeping the doctor in the dark about the prophecy about her and keeping mum on the fact that she knows he isnt going to die, and the doctor worrying about jenna’s safety and trying not to screw her up like he has past companions to kind of try to atone for his past mistakes and make it up to this girl whose life he kind of unintentionally ruined. ok honestly idk why im getting in depth but i spent. years on this fic you dont understand

so. after a while jenna just kind of calls the doctor out like come on lets at least go somewhere fun and end up spending christmas eve in new york in the forties and befriend this newly single mother and jenna fakes a REALLY BAD accent to get across that her n the doctor are related n poor to gain sympathy. they do all the things she wants like times square and macy’s, where surprise! she sees amy n rory n their son and just kind of like. guides them away from the doctor like guys. this aint ur guy. and it would fuck EVERYTHING up also hi i know your guys’s entire life story, cute kid, etc. they give jenna some advice dealing w the doctor and she tells them that she’ll try her best to make sure he doesnt like, go self hating n all that bullshit n they part ways. her n the doctor meet up again and throughout this whole first part jenna’s been noticing people following her? with like, these weird orange-y eyes. and she thinks like fuck ok this’ll ruin the adventure, maybe theyll leave but they end up starting to go after her and reveal themselves to be a species called the visicheck

after escaping and dumpster diving because the visicheck hunt based on scent, jenna and the doctor start heading towards the single mother’s place for refuge (she had seen their situation n offered a place to spend christmas eve) and on the cab ride over the doctor explains that the visicheck r these ancestors of the family of blood, and basically are lifeless specks that latch onto living things and possess them until they burn them out and move onto the next one. they consume what is the basic energy a thing needs to exist and be alive, and for different species there’s different levels. lets say a dw universe human is ur basic ten on the scale. because of different circumstances in different universes, jenna is basically a 120 on the scale. like, these things could possess her body and use it for centuries to wreck havoc with the kind of energy she holds. and jenna, thinking about the prophecy of changing the timeline and also not wanting to basically be the living dead is like yeah ok fuck this is bad.

they find some brief refuge in the single mothers apartment for a time and enjoy a lovely christmas eve dinner but eventually the visicheck catch up to them. the doctor escorts the single mother n her kid into a cab to get as far away as possible while jenna is just supposed to keep holed up in the apartment, but things arent so easy and they end up breaking in. she’s able to hit them over the head with a pan n kind of stave them off for a bit and heads for the roof, but is eventually backed into a circle. knowing the visichek can’t possess something that is dead and not wanting to potentially endanger the universe just to keep her life jenna jumps off the building in a dramatic fashion that i wrote to play with the carol of the bells because i thought it was cool, and you know what? it was. it really was.

and so jenna dies

at least for a bit

she wakes up in the tardis, rly confused because like, she died. like she knows she did. and the doctors not speaking n acting all broody and she finally gets the story out of him that after she died (posted as an anonymous person in the newspaper, i should note, and put in an unnamed grave to keep the whole “written in stone” thing in line) he kind of. went off on his own for a bit before rly hating himself for letting jenna die right in front of him and went back to catch and save her before she landed, therefore altering the events as it happened. and jenna is...not happy about this. like, one bit. because, in a twist of fate, because she is both living and dead the universe must compensate by going to misplacement, but jenna can’t fully complete the misplacement “”process”” i guess until she is in the exact location she is misplaced from, only different time and all, and in this case she’s in the tardis which almost always has its shields up, so she can’t even complete that bit. so, as explained, the universe will start the process over whenever the tardis decides to fly off again, and send jenna to a different time within the tardis’s general vicinity.

basically, she’s gonna be stuck hopping around the doctor’s timeline. like, all of it, until she finally meets up with the right doctor who knows her n has been past this point. which could take years for her. and, mind you, the task she was “assigned” in the prophecy was to change the timeline, and as a result destroy the doctor. so this is basically jenna’s worst nightmare, and she finally spills the beans about the prophecy in a fit of anger before trying to say goodbye and being whisked off

and this is where the angst stuff happens

basically, for the next year or so (when i rewrite in my head its two years, makes more sense) jenna is thrown around one end of the universe to the other, trying to stay out of the way of the doctor’s events while also trying to, you know, survive and eat and drink and sleep. she’s basically a homeless vagabond for most of it, and her abandonment issues and self harming kind of escalate. she begins leading a really lonely life, and grows this kind of love/hate relationship with the doctor where she really hopes to see him again but also grows bitter against him for putting him in this situation. she visits companions before their time with the doctor, like donna, by accident and stumbles through meeting them and trying to just keep going. in her loneliness she starts talking to a version of the doctor in her head, which starts taking more and more of a form to her before its a fully grown kind of hallucination she’s created out of loneliness (which was kind of based off of me being a lonely kid and having pretend conversations with characters to simulate human connection which is. sad. i know. really sad. its a lot).

for a time jenna is stuck with the doctor and martha during the months leading up to human nature/the family of blood, and inadvertently meets martha and gets a job at the school as a fellow maid through helping martha drag the doctor to the place. she figures its the only stability she’ll have for a while and since she was never shown in the show it isnt rly affecting the most important bits of the timeline, and resolves to stay as far away from john smith as she can and just live out her life until the events of the episodes start happening and she’ll vamoose. she adopts an accent to blend in and when she has free time finds the stashed away tardis, which initially does not recognize jenna as a companion until finding archived recordings from the future bc duh its a time machine, which brings the whole pov thing full circle, and interacts with the interface to get answers about her growing questions about the silence and her situation and learns about a device called the cage, which has been alluded to in previous “episodes” only by name, as a great machine created by the silence that is meant to basically make it so that anything inside of it would be erased for existence, past present and future, using energy form the cracks in the universe. this was still at a point in the actual series where we knew nothing so i just kind of went buckwild.

anyways

jenna ends up having to interact with the tenth doctor as john smith once, and kind of aims all of her bitterness towards her future self at him and realizes that isnt fair, apologizes, and has a cathartic moment of finally moving past a grudge with the wrong version of the doctor. eventually the events of the episodes start happening and she vamooses before getting sent off to god knows where again, yippee

eventually through the next year jenna kind of begins to rly lose hope. like, it’s been a year already, she doesn’t know if she can keep living like this. so she makes a deal with herself to wait out until the end of this second year of time travelling vagabonding before she decides to off herself to save herself and the universe the trouble.

she keeps going through the motions and actually stumbles upon a future, post-silencio doctor, with rory and amy in tow, and in a fit of like oh my god relief she kind of runs up to him and is like i found you, finally, holy shit n the doctor looks at her like im sorry but i dont...know you? like i genuinely dont know who you are. you might have ur timelines all switched up. and jenna knows this isnt true and freaks out and kind of just is like, theres like fifteen days until the deadline, all hope is lost, gonna just completely self destruct n cuts her hair and stops eating, but on the day of the actual deadline she keeps stalling as she zaps from place to place before finally deciding to end how it should end by jumping off a building n she has this heartfelt convo with this imaginary figure thats kept her company all this time

so she makes the journey up this apartment building in this basically abandoned future...chicago, i think? yeah. and you know, is about to do when whaddaya know, a familiar voice is calling out for her. she thinks its just the hallucination but eventually realizes that its actually the doctor, one that knows her, and they have this really heartfelt hug before she punches him square in the face

after the fact is a lot of secret keeping on jenna’s side. she doesnt want to be a burden and just kind of wants things to eventually get back to normal after a period of just resting finally and lies about her time being thrown around the doctors timeline, telling him it was only a few months instead of two years, and hiding the evidence of her self harm and other forms of self destruction to try and get things back to the way they were. the doctor can see through jenna’s bullshit though and over a month of just kind of chilling in the tardis and getting better she eventually tells him and after being pulled into an adventure with alien bees and a prison break and characters very much based off of the captor brothers from homestuck they kind of find their original rhythm

the next adventure was the one where i stopped writing mostly bc the plot absolutely sucked. it was a beach adventure episode, involving aliens and aliens who were mermaids and being stranded on a remote island. also, at the time i was going through a sexuality crisis and decided jenna was gonna go through it too and made her realize she was gay for one of the alien mermaids and totally made out with her. you can see how the plot was failing a bit, and the only thing i dont regret is the whole mermaid makeout thing really.

the rest of the series from that point on was supposed to go something like this: jenna has to go back to her old high school, except in the dw universe, and finds out she actually doesn’t exist in this universe??? which is weird. the doctor plays teacher and they live in the prop attic of the school investigating a counselor that literally feeds off of emotions until the students are a husk and die. there was going to be a filler where the doctor and jenna start the doctors farewell tour (it is revealed when they finally find each other at the end of the timeline jumping debacle that the doctor has like two years left until silencio happens, with like a hundred years passing between new york n finding jenna) and the doctors mortality is discussed and jenna begins to wonder what happens to her since she isnt at the event or anything going forward, and begins to worry about the prophecy again.

the finale of jenna’s adventures was supposed to go like this: they end up tackling the silence again, only with the help of the cage, after jenna notices the doctor beginning to forget more and more things about her. they get captured and the silence plan to place the doctor in the cage and eradicate him from existence so that the question to be asked never existed to begin with. i hadnt figured out how yet, but basically jenna would finally click everything together and realize it was her destiny to do this, and even had a better chance since it eradicated her from this universe, and she still had a life in another one and could maybe start over and appreciate her family and friends a bit more, and would pull a switcheroo so that she would be put in the cage and slowly eradicated from existence. from that point the silence ship would kind of go haywire from the power being used by the cage and jenna would drag the incapicitated doctor back to the tardis and saying she has to go record something real quick, and then we dont hear from her again.

last scene would be of the doctor, years and years into the future, during one of his alone periods, sifting through the tardis database and happening upon the archived recording files and listening to them, not remembering exactly but living through these events with a person that was there but also never there to begin with, and the last recording being an actual face recording of jenna saying you know, she doesnt regret a minute of it, go out there and have a nice life and dont feel bad for her before saying goodbye and zapping out of existence.

last “scene” i guess would be a fifteen year old jenna, rather than the 18-19 year old we’ve come to know, waking up the day it all started and realizing she accidentally napped through the whole day when her parents wake her up. it seems apparent she doesn’t remember a thing, but her parents say something offhand that wouldve been a prolific line and she has a sense of deja vu and hints towards her someday maybe remembering but also having a chance to live a life without the trauma of her life lead in the other universe

so uh yeah. idk why i decided to write all of this. actually i do i have an essay i have to write but. idk this fic was a huge part of my life for like. a good amount of time and despite its tackiness im actually very proud of it and just wanted to share its story without having anyone ever have the link to it and read it because despite my careful planning i did narrate like a superwholock for most of it and it was REALLY annoyin. but this fic and the character of jenna actually helped me work through a lot of my own bullshit and im still kind of in love with it. and in the years to come actually m*ffat fucking used these plot points like the tardis hating the companion n the doctor forgetting about a companion like years after i wrote this shit but i think i wrapped up the cracks in the universe n silence thing pretty fucking well so uh. petition for fifteen year old me to rewrite the last half of season 6 i guess. anyway its 2 in the morning and i just wrote honest to god a full 5,000 words about my doctor who oc fanfiction so uh. yeah. fuck.

#so dumb

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