#you always meet twice

[sea-side-scribbles]

the Lightbearer of the Garden is here 🌿

#we happy few #wehappyfew #nick lightbearer #whf #whf nick #whfnick #nicklightbearer #you always meet twice #the garden district #gardendistrict #garden district #finelinerart #fineliner art #fineliner

[dandelionfairyyy]

Heard today that my favorite teacher has resigned. Even tho I knew it’d come, it kinda broke my heart. He really was my favorite teacher. He just didn’t give a fuck about anything, told people to shut up when he had to and he was always honest and super funny, never put pressure on us… and he let us use our creativity. I loved his lessons. I am so gonna miss him…

Also sometimes I got the feeling like we had a kinda connection just because we see things similar, have same believes, same humor and stuff…

But I am happy for him. He always said he didn’t feel that good, tired, school drained his energy, needed to clean his aura a lot…

I feel that so much, so I am happy for him, he now can leave it all behind him.

And even tho he won’t ever read this: Mr Meier, thank you for one year of great German lessons, three months of interesting politics lessons and good grades, for nice chats and just for being an amazing human. I wish you all the best for the future and I genuinely hope we meet again one day. I’d love to hear your after-school story.

#favourite teacher #you always meet twice #feelings #life #writers on tumblr #school

[hitsuzenhusbands]

i may be wrong on this but im pretty sure barbara calls ed riddler/nygma the entirety of episode 6 until he gets shot and she calls him eddie. which is very important to me

#again might be wrong because THEY GOT RID OF TRANSCRIPTS? #FOR NO REASON? #they may have always been a little bit wrong and very hard to read #but they were my BEST FRIEND #anyway. yes they are important 2 me #if you interpret them as in love thats...fine idc #but to me #they are friends c: #batman unburied #batman unburied spoilers #the only other time she called him eddie wassss twice in ep 4? #after meeting with vale #and then after he got beat up

[cruelsister-moved2]

i like refrain from commenting on this but its getting to a point where i see it daily so listen i cant think of a nice way to say this sorry 😭 but if this is you then with all love now is probably not the moment in your life to start going by a hebrew name and changing ur icon to a magen david on a pride flag and starting a blog called journeying-to-hashem. and i say this with love for you like i think people are too worried to say something in case theyre gatekeeping but the fact is this type of thing is going to seriously negatively impact any future experience you do have - or on the other equally valid hand make it very difficult for you to realise that this may not be the right step for you at this point in time.

if you genuinely feel that every rabbi you meet is "super bigoted and weird" then (without judging you bc idk you and maybe you are just surrounded by dozens of homophobic rabbis and there's nothing antisemitic at all behind this statement) it could be that... joining the community they represent is not right for you, even if only at this point in time in your current location, and your tumblr experience is giving you the warped impression that its all nonbinary people in trad-egal minyans which is not going to be the case in almost any irl community so you will feel let down by all of them which unfair to both yourself and them (i.e my first point)

#and i keep meeting like 15 year olds irl who do this um #imscared 😭 but like they always come twice and then disappear when they realise its not just reblogging a picture of a pomegranate #this is one of like three phenomena that are making me seriously consider leaving tumblr bc seeing it every day is like #great so im just going to get pissed off again for no reason #thats a fake url i made up so sorry if thats someones url #and not @ this specific person its just very on the nose #also just feels representative of the wider death of community thinking in the young online community lol #sometimes you have to enter into community with people whose views dont 100% line up with yours #but are like fundamentally good and kind people. and if you actually listen to them and treat them as equals you may find that not only are #they open to your point of view on some things but you might find yourself learning from them as well #crazy rite..

[intheorangebedroom]

I love seeing you on my dash no matter the time 🧡 Happy Hump Day! Confession… I hate that term but if you DARE to bring up Frankie, headboards, zip ties, and THAT gif on a Wednesday then I’m GOING to use it. Every day can be hump day when Frankie’s involved (twice on Frankie Fridays) ☺️

I might treat myself to an extra nice baguette from a French bakery (I’ll pretend it’s Atelier Francisco) and perhaps my tricky brain will let all my PTMY thoughts out. I’ve read the epilogue twice so far, the second time to collect all my favorite parts because I didn’t want to interrupt the first reading.

Let’s dance on Tom’s grave together to celebrate you coming back 😇 -🥖

I love being back to hear more from you, love 🥰 And I sure hope you’re going to treat yourself to that extra nice baguette, for no other reason than that you’re fantastic and you deserve all the extra nice things 🧡🫂🧡

Of course I’m going to bring up Frankie and that gif, on a Wednesday (hump day 🤭🤭🤭) and everyday. You do not want to know how often I think about those zip ties. My friend, I HAVE THOUGHTS. Constant, numerous, invasive, persistant thoughts about those damn zip ties. So I’d better stop now before this gets out of hand.

Here’s to dancing with you, my lovely 🧡🥖🧡

#🥖 anon #I’ll always come back for you my lovely 🧡 #you’ve read it twice? 🥺🥺🥺 #I’m so glad you like it 🧡 #the pilot™️ #frankie morales #francisco catfish morales #pleased to meet you

[the-cat-at-the-theatre-door]

This was going to be something else but here’s whatever this is instead

#CATS Musical #Alonzo #Demeter #demlonzo #fanart #my art #this went from going to be that stupid little meet cute from season 4 of stranger things #to semi angsty i guess - alonzo's nose was bleeding at one point demeter had a bruise #probably more of a 'what you have a death wish?' 'yeah' kinda exchange #maybe a one of these days i'm not gonna be around to help you - i'm counting on it type of exchanges #i will never draw demeter the same way twice it's always a surprise #just something silly #i'll finish something sometime i promise

[exopelagic]

honk shoo.

#but yeah sleepy. #i have so much to do these next few days I’m gonna die #meanwhile I just wanna see my friends #the good thing is that some of the busy things involve seeing my friends but goddamn why are almost all of them hard #also YES I’m going to be dumb and gay again bc a) why shouldn’t I b) nobody can stop me #I’m being dumb and gay again. #now seen The Guy twice since I’ve been back and he’s very cool #still feel like I’m being insane god idk what I’m doing #I hope he comes tomorrow bc he can’t make the meeting which means he won’t be on committee which sucks bc he did want to #OH but I did mean to tell him there was one role he could go for and have a good shot at that I think he’d be good for #only problem is if he doesn’t come tomorrow I can’t tell him in time bc I don’t have any way to message him other than email #(which feels slightly creepy bc I only know it bc secretary and he’s never explicitly said his surname so it’s just inferred from the list) #idk. the thing that gets me is we are very much friends now. like early stages of friends but we keep talking at hockey #and importantly he keeps coming To Me which keeps surprising me bc he does it more than any of my other friends #but I guess I’m also coming to him kinda a lot too. self awareness falls when around cute boy you get how it is #god it’s so unfair why is he like this #I finished getting my skates off before he did yesterday which gave me a very good opportunity to Look while he was talking #and have it not be weird and he’s just very pretty. he’s got a rlly nice nose #i always feel insane pointing out noses it’s the Draw speaking bc I use noses as a focal point and they’re fun to draw #tbh it’s unlikely I will say someone does Not have a nice nose but idk let me have this. it would be fun to draw is maybe what I mean #and I hadn’t noticed before bc the like bridge? and uhh like. base? idk nose words but they don’t match #the bridge is super long and on the thin side w a bump like mine but the like bottom is much rounder and wider and I don’t see that mix much #he also just has rlly nice hair it’s super curly and he’s in that like weird light brown purgatory where it’s all different colours #like it’s mostly light brown but some bits look rlly dark and some especially at the ends is like almost blonde and it changes w the light #god he also keeps doing this dumb fucking thing where he’s trying to skate while squatting all the way and it’s ridiculous #he looks like a spider folding in on itself and the worst part is he can fucking do it #he’s gotten so good at skating recently and I have a feeling he lives somewhere with an ice rink bc I’m sure he’s better than he was novembr #yeah I also got to just stand and watch him play yesterday and it’s so incredibly horribly unfair #anyway I’m too fucking gay and I will not let him escape me again tomorrow I Will get his instagram or smth bc I swear this man #luke.txt

[fandomssaremysoul]

#adhd #actually adhd #adhd rsd #rsd things #Meme #Kermit #kermit meme #Dark Kermit #The most Lonely aligned thing ever #Can you guess who would claim me??? #tma reference #it happens #Everytime I join a discord #I get intimidated by the fact that it was made of friends who know each other for like years and then I jump in bc I'm desperate for friends #And community and I really want that but somehow always forget that the people care for each other already and have a connection and I don't #Yet at least I could in a while but I feel like I try too hard and thats embarrassing and dumb and I'll never meet these people #I'm poor and they're too cool and halfway across the world and would probably not blink twice should I just disappear #Really the hitting the “And I am an idiot with a painted face in the corner taking up space but when he walks in I am loved” but it's #It's strangers you met on the internet giving you a line of attention in a discord group #pathetic loser

[dirt-str1der]

Literally fucked that kiryu was so appalled that nishiki shot their dad like he loves his brother but hes straight up brainwashed by kazama he actually thinks he can do no wrong kuze pulled him aside like hey dude your dad made you live in a dog kennel and visited like twice a year and kiryu was like so ?

#Yakuza loveblog #do you ever think about how kiryu got mad that kazama got shot when he should have been like nishiki you should have shot him twice for what #he did to you man sorry i wasnt there for you but i am now and i will always have your back #he should have let nishiki kill more people. he should have been like hey haruka nishiki is my brother he will never hurt you lets go meet #him okay i promise nothing bad will happen #fucked that kiryu forgave majima for kidnapping haruka but nishiki asks for harukas pendant and kiryus like FUCK you. im out of here

[sea-side-scribbles]

the prettiest flowers in the Garden 🌼🌸 

#we happy few #wehappyfew #nick lightbearer #whf #whf nick #whfnick #nicklightbearer #morrie memento #morriememento #nickxmorrie #you always meet twice #the garden district #gardendistrict #garden district #finelinerart #fineliner art #fineliner #fanart traditional #traditional art #traditionalart #flowers #garden

[zemnarihah]

hm. my dad is now aware that i have slept over at eriks when i visit him.

#dont love that. #he brought it up bc i have an aunt and uncle in his city and i think he was going to offer to like see if i could stay with them at some #point to visit him #he was like have you thought of visiting erik in (city)? and i was like. yeah #and he was like. have you? and i was like. yeah. and he was like how many times? and i said twice and he was like oh. where did you stay? #and i said. eriks place. and he was like. oh. well you know you have an aunt and uncle there that would let you stay right? and i was like. #yeah i know. and it was in front of my mom and sister and brother in law and HIS sister and everyone was so quiet because they know how my #dad is #and i was like in the process of leaving so i just like said bye to everybody real quick and left so im still like. agh. scawed! #idk why even its not like theres anything he can do to me its just like. god i really want to have peace with him i do not want to ever hav #another lecture from him or get yelled at by him again idk im still scared of that. and he hasnt even met erik yet and probably has a #terrible impression of him now just based off of that even though i am always telling them great stuff about him i dont want HIM to deal #with that especially because i do not think that he would take as much bullshit which he shouldnt have to but god i just have this vision o #my dad like. pulling erik aside for a talk or something if they ever meet and trying to scare him and them getting into an argument bc erik #would stand up for himself #idk who knows if that will happen im literally making up scenarios in my head to scare myself but christ. \ #the thing is also at this point in my life i just like. i have to keep moving forward in like. the whole living my life without constantly #thinking about the church's and my dad and the rest of my family's expectations. I have to. I almost lied to him but i didnt and thats #really big progress but im still so scared. but whatever. do it scared. agh!

[queens-of-my-life]

Tonight I went to this really fancy dinner/revue show kind of thing. You get a four course meal and in between each course there's singing or acrobatic or comedy acts. basically a very fancy kind of circus with dinner. that's the best way I can describe it.....anyway there was this one waitress, maybe mid-forties, shoulder-length blond-ish hair, short, glasses, REALLY cute. She kind of looked a bit like Leisha Hailey. The moment I saw her I immediately felt drawn to her. And it wasn't only that I was physically attracted to her, she exuded this energy that made me feel all warm and fuzzy and made my want to get to know her. It was strange, I've never felt that before and the feeling was instant, the second I first saw her. Unfortunately, she ended up not being our waitress, she had the tables in the area across from us. All evening, like a total creep, I was staring at this woman from across the room. I was barely able to pay attention to the show and I couldn't hold a conversation with the people at my table for more than a minute or two because my gaze always drifted back to her.

Unfortunately, there was no opportunity for me to talk to her and I don't even know her name but now I'm back home again and I feel almost heartbroken because most likely I will never see this woman again in my life but all evening it almost felt like I was falling a bit in love with her.

#it sounds so silly #but it was a truly strange feeling #I think there's an old saying thst you always meet people twice in your life #I really hope I will see her again

[aliennooboo]

hmm

#nonsims #been thinking of the support group that starts this sunday #in a way my brains are all 'you don't need to go if it makes you uncomfortable!!! you can just stay home!!! that would be sooo comfy!!!' #but at the same time i recognize that stepping out of my comfort zone might be very good in this particular case #not that i haven't been out of my comfort zone all my life lol #i just know that i need Something that feels real and important in my life #i need to build myself some kind of a life where i will still have things to live for if/when i lose the most important people in my life #and you know what. i counted the social things i've done independently as an adult #like sure my bf's friends visit us a few times a year #but for me those visits are 100% tied to my bf and i would never see those people without him cos they're HIS friends #i do always refer to them as our friends but the reality is that i would never hear from them again if me and the bf split up #so i counted the stuff i've done independently (school or work or hanging out with mom/grandma/bf not included) #i've had dinner with my coworkers TWICE (i didn't want to go but i didn't dare stand out by not going) #i've been to a bar with my work partner ONCE (after one of those dinners) #i see my BFF 2-3 times PER YEAR #that's it. that's my independent social life for AT LEAST the last 12 years #so you know if i were to go to the support group and attend all 11 meetings... #that would be like the biggest social thing for me in my whole adult life #and it's so funny cos it's an AUTISM support group!!! my biggest social thing would be an autism support group!!! #so i'm trying to get into this mindset that i'll go at least this first time to see what it's like

[katyspersonal]

I guess I've reached the point of being so useless that a close friend straight up dumps me when I put up a boundary and say I need to heal from what happened between us. Guess my use as "I don't have anyone else to listen to me and admire me anyway" expired entirely when they grew too comfortable with parasocial relationship. Of course, real people are pointless, they are too much hassle because they can't be perfect and can't meet ALL one's needs, right?

I mean this is my fault, what else I expected from a bond in which I am not because I am loved, but because I am "the only one who understands"? Never grow close with such people. Being "the only one" is a very weak glue. They will replace you with a newer tool very easily - if not with someone they actually like, then with paracosial bond if not literal imaginary friend that understands them even better.

#/vent #this is only half of january and i already had my trust ruined very badly TWICE #i was right to not fear my enemies. because fearing your friends is more wise. #i guess parasocial or imaginary people are better than me? #they always meet expectations and they dont have misunderstandings or set boundaries #honestly if you feel like you are not a choice you need to not get too attached #you will be replaced if you are kept for your functions and not for who you are #thrown away like expired tool #maybe not even expired. more like that company produced a new thing. #in this world i am a phone with buttons and my love is a person that discovered smartphone.

[jvzebel-x]

🦋

#one of my least favourite media tropes is the 'bad person w a heart of gold' character lmao #i think its a kneejerk response to my inherent belief that when someone tells you point blank who they are you should believe them lmao #but also maybe its projection bc its not like ppl arent always offput by me for one reason or another #w/o ever actually getting to know me lmao. #so like maybe i just have chosen to disavow all versions of having a 'deeper' self in favour of spitting on the idea that i should have to #prove myself by disproving anything w a Deeper Level of Self lmao. maybe im actually just exactly what meets the eye. #perhaps i am not only totally fine w that but genuinely prefer it that way lmao. #... that is all hypothetical nonsense rambling however lmao. what is objective fact is the Bad Person w A Heart of Gold trope #has done as much damage as the Manic Pixie Dream Girl trope&i fucking hate them both the exact same amount lmao. #what is also objective fact is that i have now dropped two books in a row bc i refuse to sit thru the plot points of #'im an asshole but pls get to know me its def not fucked up that i take my bullshit out on random ppl like a toddler pls coddle this' #&'no one could ever understand my sad life story that makes me extremely abusive pls fix me' LMAO #ahhh i just need better distraction. between everything going on back home&the unstable weather making my unstable body heave #i have been going rather stir crazy&usually i can get thru like a book a day when things are like this #&starting over twice is Offensive right now LMAO.

[romance-incubomp3]

I thought I had gotten over my deep self loathing over having almost zero sexual experience but it’s back I guess!!

#I hate myself it makes me feel so cringey and lame and gross and unappealing #I feel so ashamed and embarrassed #I’m not even ace at all and I’ve always wanted to have sex but I’m so unappealing and weird it never happens #I was 23 and it happened like twice with someone I had zero interest in #but I was so relieved for the first time in my entire life someone wanted to have sex with me #everyone acts like it’s so easy to get laid #it seems like sex just comes so naturally to everyone else and they just like #meet people and there’s attraction both ways?? #I can’t imagine that happening to me #I know it isn’t actually a big deal to not have sex but #society acts like you’re an ugly loser if you haven’t had sex by the time you are like 18 #and I went through four years of college without ever having sex #most people I knew back in high school had sex already #it didn’t even happen for me in college #I feel like there’s something deeply wrong with me that makes people not want me