#which didn't really annoy me because he was only offering and only wrote that sentence in english

[asherloki]

Omg I love the idea of how you get the girl with sherlock, like he looses reader somehow and had to convince her to come back to him.

The one and only

BBC Sherlock x reader

Word count:- 960

Fluff ofcourse, can it be called a little angsty?

A/n:- you have an interesting profile picture by the way!

"you might wanna open the door" said my mum with a smile that told me that she's hiding the identity of the guest who's been outside, waiting for someone to open the door.

"why, it's raining who is it?" I enquired as I looked up at the sky through the window, it was pouring rain.

"open the damn door, you'll find out" she said with annoyance this time. Rolling my eyes I went to open the door and to my surprise Sherlock stood there, soaked in rain, yet he tried to smile and wave at me.

"what are you, insane?" I asked with utter exasperation. He stopped waving and opened his mouth to say something perhaps, but he changed his mind and shut it.

"it's raining Sherlock just go home" I said while shutting the door when he almost jumped and forbid me from doing that.

"no no wait wait a minute" he said, "please I..." he trailed off searching for words, "I have to say something."

"no" I replied with anger, "I'm not listening to you, there's no use of you standing in this rain trying to convince me, so just... go home, you're a busy man Sherlock Holmes."

"I can stand here forever if that's what it takes to convince you... if that's what it takes to get my girl back." he said, and he meant it, which made me wanna listen to whatever he has to say so I opened the half closed door, "then you must come in" I offered as politely as possible for a person who's really annoyed.

"no I... " he stood where he was all this time, at my door, under the rain, "I must ... I must stand here and tell you that... that".

"what?" I enquired for his answer because the way he scared me wasn't quite right, "you scared me, you didn't contact me for once this whole time you were out solving that bloody case."

"yes, my fault I admit, but I was just..." he ruffled his wet hair, not to shake off some water I bet he was wondering how to actually apologize, "I was so engulfed into the mystery that... whatever it was, it was so wrong of me and you have all the right to yell at me, shut the door on my face, be very angry indeed, but I never lied, I never lied to you".

He said and I listened in between the pauses only the sound of the rain was heard, "lied?"

"yes I never lied, I still love you exactly like the first time." He was geniune, confident, aware of what he was saying, exactly like all the time he's confessed, or rather proved he loves me, he was never for once regretful, he never for once hid his feelings for me.

"look whatever you say I don't think..."

"I know" he interrupted, "I know I broke your heart, and I know I can fix it again, for I fixed it before as well, and that time I wasn't the one responsible for it".

He was truthful again, he found me heartbroken and fixed me and here I am again, heartbroken.

"but I cannot trust you like I did before " I said softly, hoping he understands.

"even though you know I did nothing wrong?"

"yes, because... people... articles Sherlock, you being unable to track for a few days, they didn't find any answer from me too, so ... so.." I paused, "they wrote all their assumptions and those are stuck in my head." Said I atlast.

"I don't know what to say to that" his sentence scared me, is he giving up on me? I knew I perhaps can never go back to being the one who blindly trusted him for some bloody rumours but I still knew deep down Sherlock never lied to me, he was solving a case and that was the truth, I know him enough to know what's the truth and what not.

"but I'd say this" he said, "I want you, for better for worse, for richer for poor, in sickness and in health, I want you forever. If I fail to convince you I assure you, you'll never hear one news, Sherlock Holmes getting married, because I won't."

'he won't marry? not even me?' I thought.

"if it's not you then no one shall be called Mrs Sherlock Holmes" his mask of the strong emotionless expression fell off. He was desperate now, he asked for my answer as if he can't bare fo stand away from me anymore. Neither could I. Without thinking I ran in the rain and embraced him, he hugged me tightly and we knew our tears fell camouflaging with the rain drops. After pulling away he cupped my cheek with one hand and asked,

"you accept my apology? do you forgive me?"

"ofcourse I forgive you" I said putting my hands on his chest, "ofcourse I do.. but it'll take me time to go back to normal ".

"surely " Sherlock replied, "take all the time you want, just don't be away from me, you have my lifetime."

"then fix me Sherlock... again" I said putting my head on his chest.

"I'm not going anywhere, like I've never went away before".

"Sherlock?" I said lifting my face to meet his eyes, we both were drenched, all credit goes to the rain now, "take me where my heart belongs, take me to Baker Street, take me home".

"I will, for Baker Street needs to be home for me again as well, and you make it home for me." he answered with the sweetest smile, it was hard, but I knew one thing for sure, his love for me was true.

#bbc sherlock #sherlock x reader #sherlock x y/n #sherlock holmes x reader #sherlock x you #i am sherlocked #sherlock fanfic

[ssaaaronmontgomery]

Under The Weather

Warnings: None really other than sick reader, fluff<3

Word count: 1.1k

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Greg Montgomery x gn!reader

A/n: I wrote this specifically for @greg-montgomery because Fay is sick and I wanted to give this to her<3. Bestie I hope you're getting better🩷🩷.

Tags: @hotchnerbau @criminalskies @ssahotchnerr

Forever tags: @greg-montgomery @boredelle

You'd had a very sore throat the last couple of days, which made you miserable.  The only thing that helped was that Aaron and Greg had been taking such good care of you.  They insisted on it.

The first day they both stayed with you, snuggling you, feeding you, giving you medicine.  They pampered you to no end.  The second day Aaron went to work and Greg stayed with you, then on the third day Greg went and Aaron stayed.

You're on your fourth day and it is now Saturday.  Even though you're feeling a little better they still refuse to let you do much of anything.  They didn't want you to worsen your condition by doing anything too strenuous.  Which apparently included using the toilet.

You stand up from bed, Aaron on one side of you and on the other side Greg would normally be there but he was busy in the kitchen making you some soup.  "What are you doing?" Aaron had concern laced in his voice along with some curiosity.  "I'm going to pee?" You responded with a scratchy voice and a raised eyebrow.  "Let me help you." He moves to get up but you hold a hand up.  "Aaron this isn't something I still need help with.  I didn't really need help with it the last three days before either." You speak softly.  He gives a slight frown and nods as he sits back down on the bed reluctantly.

You take a few steps in the direction of the bathroom when Greg walks through the bedroom door, bowl of soup in his hands.  "Why are you out of bed?  Why are they up?" Greg asks you first then turns to Aaron with the second question.  "They have to go to the bathroom." Aaron answers for you and you start walking again but Greg is quick to set the soup down and be at your side.

"Okay, let me help then." He puts a hand on your shoulder and one on your lower back.  "I just went through this with Aaron.  I don't need help.  I'm okay, really, I'm fine." You don’t say it harshly, you speak in a soft tone again, coughing a bit at the end of your sentence.  Greg frowns more than Aaron did, gives you a pout, and his best puppy dog eyes.  You look at him for a moment before sighing and giving in.  "Okay okay.  Fine.  Be my escort to the bathroom." He smiles and kisses your cheek.  

You know they both mean well, but they always act like you're on the verge of death even if you just have sniffles.  If you sneeze more than twice in a row one of them always offers to get allergy medicine for you.  The smallest thing happens to you and they immediately enter protective mode.  You've grown rather used to it though.  And you know it's just because they love you so much.  But thinking you'll break a bone just walking to the toilet is a little extreme, but you love them just as much so of course you're fine with putting up with it even when it gets slightly annoying.  Most of the time it’s sweet though.

Soon enough you feel another hand on your back just above Greg's and one more on your other shoulder.  You knew that as soon as you said yes to Greg that Aaron would immediately join as well.  Not always, but most times, they are a package deal.  Especially when you're sick.  They already like to baby you but they do it to no end when you're ill.  Normally you just try to let yourself enjoy it.

Once you're all snug in bed again they both join you this time, Greg spoon feeding the soup to you like you can't do that on your own either.  It's endearing though.  Aaron is snuggled into your side as you eat and watch one of your favourite films.  Greg can't really pay any attention to it though as he's trying not to spill hot soup on you.  

Once that is over with your attention is entirely on the television screen but after a little while you feel eyes on you.  When you look at them you see them both staring at you with the most lovey dovey look on their faces.  "Why are you staring at me?  Is there something on my face?" "No, you're just so cute even when you're sick.  With your red stuffy nose." Aaron answers.  "And your eyes that are always half closed because you're more tired than you normally would be.  You're just really cute is all." Greg finishes the answer to your question as he smiles big.  

"So you two think I'm cute when I'm suffering?" You make it sound a little more dramatic than you need to, but it is still a valid question and they've been dramatic about it all anyway, so now it's your turn to be the dramatic one.  "Yes." They both answer at the same time.  Your brows furrow and you look between them both a few times before deciding to just let them be and go back to watching the movie.

Soon enough you're falling asleep.  Having them both cuddled up in bed with you always makes you feel safe and sound.  It always relaxes the three of you and it makes it much easier to fall into peaceful rest.  It may only be the middle of the day on Saturday but you're all perfectly content with sleeping the day away.  

When they notice you've fallen asleep, they stop the movie.  Aaron wraps an arm around you and gently rolls you both over so he's on his back and you're pressed against his side with your head on his chest as Greg scoots up behind you and rests his hand on your side.  Nuzzling his face into the back of your neck and shoulder leaving a few soft kisses there.  Aaron on the other hand is kissing the top of your head.  

"We love you." Aaron whispers and places a kiss on the crown of your head.  "Very much." Greg says and leans over a little to kiss your cheek like he did earlier.  

They stay like this for a while.  Holding you close. They do their best to make you comfortable, but it's hard when you're sick and they can't just remove that from you in just one day.  Seeing you not feeling your best in any form always makes them sad to some degree.  So when you're sick, they just do what they know how to do, which is to pamper you.  Even if maybe they over-pamper you just a little.  You all know you just want the best for each other and that's what you do.  You all do your best and that's what counts.  Even if their best might annoy you just slightly in these situations.

#aaron hotchner #hotch #aaron hotchner x reader #hotch x reader #aaron hotchner x you #aaron hotchner x gender neutral reader #aaron hotchner fluff #greg montgomery #greg montgomery x reader #greg montgomery x you #greg montgomery x gender neutral reader #greg montgomery fluff

[tadpolejourney]

Day 5

The situation at the grove is tense to say the least. The druids are doing some sort of religious rite to close the grove to outsiders because they're afraid of monsters and goblins. They mean to leave the tieflings to die. They don't care that there are elderly and children among them, nor do they care what they've had to endure to get here.

Kagha is cruel and dangerous, ready to murder a child over a wooden idol. The druids are cowardly and even those who oppose her in private will not act against her. I offered to find Halsin, their real leader, in the hopes that will keep them from doing something foolish. Zevlor, the tiefling leader, thought me a murderer for hire, and wants me to kill Kagha. No thanks. I really hope I can find Halsin alive and keep those tiefling kids safe. I've made a huge mistake and gotten attached to them. I know their names.

Nettie, the druid healer, tried to murder me rather than cure me. I knocked her out, and I hope no other desperate infected crosses her path.

I met a bard named Alfira, helped her finish a song. The cat's out of the bag... they know I'm Calypso now. None of them have met me before or seen me on stage though, so that saves me the embarrassment of not remembering yet another person in a sea of faces and single-serve encounters. She seemed star-struck but wasn't too weird about it, which I appreciated. She has a lot of potential from what I can tell. A very sweet heart, with a sweet voice to match. She seems like she could nurture the talent in others if she wanted to.

Shortly after meeting Alfira, a cambion appeared to us. Offering a cure for the infection. Raphael, he calls himself. Took us to his House of Hope, used a lot of bad poetry and threats as a sales pitch. Typical devilry, 0 stars, did not purchase. He's just as full of shit as any other devil, and I refuse to give him what he wants. I'm betting he knows nothing about Mephisto and I. He better watch himself if he knows what's good for him.

We saved a tiefling boy from a pack of harpies. Actually the toughest fight we've had yet. He wrote a story about me. Sweet kid.

Still not entirely sure what Gale's deal is. He complimented me with one sentence, and then proceeded to fully overshadow his compliment with a long declamation of self-aggrandizement and boasting about his superior magical prowess. So strange.

I went to speak to him at camp tonight and he was staring longingly at a conjured image of Mystra. I can tell there's more than just religious devotion there; it seemed like intense obsession. We talked of magic and channeled the Weave together. I've felt the sensations of magic before, naturally, but this was more powerful and more practiced than I could ever be. I finally got a glimpse of just how powerful of a wizard he was before this mess. Channeling the Weave was intimate, sensual, but safe. It didn't matter that it felt safe; it was too intimate for me and I could feel myself starting to panic. However, that anxiety was completely overpowered by my wanting. I had to make serious, concerted effort to hide how I was feeling. It felt like my heart was pounding so hard, surely he must have heard it. I kept trying to remind myself that I can't trust this man, that he's hiding something major, he's full of himself, he's obsessed with a goddess, etc. I tried to give myself a million reasons why my feelings in that moment should not be acted upon. But it was as though I were completely deaf to my own wisdom, fear, and reason. I conjured the image and feeling of what I thought it would be like to kiss him. Being that close to him, it was as though there was so much heat. I've felt chemistry with people, attraction, wanting, all familiar territory. This felt like drowning in a bonfire. I watched his face, and it flickered quickly from shock to contemplation to something indescribable.

I've realized why he annoys me so much. It's because I want him. It annoys me that I feel this way when we've only just met. He didn't refuse me. He told me what I conjured was 'most welcome'. But nothing happened either. UGH

I think I have everyone else pretty much figured out. I don't think Lae'zel has any secrets whatsoever. The Blade of Frontiers and Shadowheart still have their secrets of course, but the nature of their characters is clear to me. They would both be difficult to get close to, but for entirely different reasons. Wyll (he does have a real name after all) is all about the cause, the mission. He will entertain very little else. Still, he's courteous and kind which is more than I can say for the vast majority of people I've met. I trust him for the most part. Still think he has something serious going on, which I can't place full trust in anyone who has something that big to hide. Shadowheart is simply determined to keep everyone away from her, and she is rude and abrasive to accomplish that. I don't think I'll try anymore. Maybe she'll come around, or maybe she'll just be an asshole the entire journey. If that's the case we can hope it's a short one.

I'm pretty sure Astarion's only real secret was being a vampire spawn. He opened up to me about the situation he was in before the infection. His old master Cazador was so horrible to him that he'd actually take the devil's deal rather than go back. I don't know details but I don't need to. I could see it in his eyes. I wonder if he could tell just how well I understood. I feel as though I now know him best out of everyone, which is unexpected. He's fun, and I like him. He stole a book from the tiefling kids for me because he noticed I'd been collecting that particular series of books and hoped to find a full set. While it was sweet and all, I told him not to make a habit of stealing from children, but to feel free to steal whatever he can get away with from rich people, assholes, and monsters. He's treating me with what I believe to be equal parts placation, flirtation, and intimation. I understand that pattern of relating very well. It's what I've done to protect myself in the past too. I won't take him seriously unless I have cause or occasion to do so. It's fun to be flirted with by a beautiful man. So long as he doesn't cross any lines, I'll be fine. She says with little confidence. Anyway, when you're staring death in the face all the time and you're surrounded by other people who think little of you (some of whom are openly hostile towards you), hearing sweet words that make you feel special feels really nice. Even if they're lies.

I finally got sheet music thanks to Alfira. I can start writing out Act V! Maybe if I can bring myself to stop writing about my companions I'll be able to get this work done.

<<< Day 4 | Index | Day 6 >>>

#baldur's gate #baldur's gate 3 #baldur's gate oc #baldur's gate tav #baldurs gate 3 #bg3 #bg3 tav #baldur's gate iii #baldurs gate tav #bg3 spoilers #gale x tav #bg3 gale #bg3 astarion #tav #bg3 companions #bg3 wyll #bg3 lae'zel

[yyxgin]

hi are we friends yet because ♡ i have decided to come to you whenever some stupid bts shit goes through my mind and today i offer you: a drabble in which the boys invite you (a close friend mayhaps?idk i didn't think this through) to visit them on tour and you have to share a bed with a member who isn't exactly fond of you but you end up cuddling and he goes all soft for you when you wake up?only if you want to!!you don't even have to write it you can just respond 'yes 💞' and i'd say thank

hi hello we are best friends now,,please come to me with all the bts shit i'm willing to write everything. anyways here it is,,you did not specify the member so i wrote it w seokjinnie (i'm living for this au btw,, its so over-used but still good lmao)

pairing: seokjin x fem!reader ; genre: idk man, angst? and than fluff? seokjin hates you and then he does not ; words: 1.5k ; warnings: mentions of alcohol, maybe curse words i'm not sure, jin is a meanie >:((

Kim Seokjin wasn't exactly fond of you.

So when he found out that his band mate Jungkook insisted on bringing you, his best friend, to visit them on tour for a week, he was furious.

„What do you mean y/n is coming? You won't be able to focus, she'll only distract us from work.“

His excuse was a poor one, but it made sense. The bad thing was that his younger brother was quick to sweep off any of these reasonings off the table.

„Seokjin hyung, she's my best friend. I promised to take her with me some day and she always wanted to visit Spain. And it's only for a week.“ his pleading was a pain in the older's ass. He always gave in for his little one.

Why didn't Seokjin like you? Well, that's an interesting question.

You were quite childish in his eyes, being the same age as his maknae. He never saw you as a grown woman, you were always a little girl for him. The age gap wasn't that big, but to Seokjin, it seemed like a good enough reason for him to have second thoughts. You two haven't really talked to each other that much, but he felt like your personalities just did not click well. So with that, Jin has made his mind. He didn't hate you, but he was more happy when you weren't around.

„You guys were so good!“

These words were the first Seokjin heard when he came back into the waiting room at the stadium. He rolled his eyes as he took a seat on the sofa and tried to catch his breath.

„Thank you!“ Jin watched Jungkook as he took you into his arms and span you around.

„Especially Jin, Epiphany really made me tear up a little. Your managers made fun of me when they saw me.“ you giggled and took a seat next to your best friend on the sofa.

„Yeah, sure.“

Jin's tone of voice made your best friend glare at him. His words hurt you a little, but you weren't going to show it. You weren't a little girl anymore.

„We are getting drinks! Y/n, you're coming, right?“ Jimin asked you and pierced you with a playful look.

„Of course I am!“ you laughed.

Everyone liked you. Not Seokjin. It was weird.

But as the boys catched their breathes, changed and ate dinner, all eight of you made your way into a packed club in Madrid to celebrate the success their toor has been so far.

If you weren't there, they wouldn't be getting drinks right now. But it was your last night here, so they wanted to make sure it was a memoriable one. It made Jin's stomach twist. Are you really a kid that needs to be entertained?

„Promise to not get drunk.“ you said to Jungkook in a low tone.

Jin's ears pricked up on the sound of your voice.

„I won't.“

„Promise. I don't want to take care of you tonight.“ your scolding made Jin smirk.

Jungkook was known to be a literal baby when drunk and everyone knew this. It was understaneable of you not wanting to be his care-taker for the last day of your visit.

But Jungkook did not keep his promise.

And so when it was past 3 am and everyone was drunk out of their minds, it was your job to get them to their hotel. You were sharing a room (and a bed, you two really didn't mind) with Jungkook and you really wanted to sleep, because the night has been everything but fun to you.

Everyone got drunk. You did not. But neither did Jin.

He saw you struggling to carry your best friend. Altough he thought that this whole drinking session was for you, it seemed now that you didn't even enjoy drinking. Seokjin furrowed his brows as he came up to you and helped you with the heavy beast your friend was.

„Let's go. I've sent the rest of them in a cab to the hotel already and another one is waiting for us in front of the bar.“ his voice was low and considerate, but loud enough to cut through the loud music.

You shamefully looked to the ground and nodded. Why were you acting so bashful?

You eventually got to the hotel, so now it was time to go to your room and get him to sleep. Jungkook, on the other hand, had a different idea.

„I want to sleep with Jimin tonight.“ he offered.

„No, Jungkook, we are sharing a room.“

„But I want to sleep in Jimin's room.“

You knew there was no use in trying to convince him. If you'd bring him to your room, he'd only get up and try go get to Jimin's room, which would cause only more trouble. So you nodded along and with Seokjin's help, you tried to walk him to Jimin's room.

Once the door behind him was closed, you were left with Jin. It was strangely quiet.

„Umm… thanks for the help. You can go to sleep now. Sorry for bothering so much.“ you let out and shyly smiled at your companion.

„Well, I'd love to, but your best friend just went and took my bed, so…“

The realisation hits you. Everyone was now in their rooms, all the beds were taken. The only bed free for the two of you to use was the bed you were supposed to share with Jungkook.

„Oh, well, you can sleep in my bed. I'll take the floor.“ you said and began to walk to your room on the other side of the hallway.

„What about Jungkook's bed?“

„Well, we were supposed to share. So, it's the same bed.“ you were red in your cheeks. The sight somehow made Jin chuckle.

„How practical.“

He didn't say anything else as he walked into your room. The bed was big, there was no trouble with two people sleeping there and not running into each other's bodies.

But even after this realisation, a confusing sentence left Seokjin's mouth. „It's fine, I'll take the floor.“

„No!“ you let out, suddenly wincing at the urgency in your voice. „I mean, no. It's my fault, so you take the bed. You need to sleep in a comfortable place, you are a performer, you can't wake up with a sore back.“ you explained.

It was good to hear from you. The words didn't sound only polite, but considerate as well, making Seokjin look at you in a slightly different way. „Sleep in the bed too. It's big enough." he muttered.

The blush on your cheeks deepened. „No, I can't…“

„For the love of god, just do it. I want to sleep already and I'm not in the mood for bickering.“ he snapped.

The tone of his voice cut through you like a knife. He sounded so annoyed. You hated feeling annoying. You didn't reply.

So after a few minutes, you found yourself sharing a bed with Kim Seokjin. It was strange. And weird. And it definetly made your heart race.

Jin's heart? Fine. But his conscience? Bad.

„Sorry for snapping.“ he said into the quiet room.

„Oh, it's okay. You have every right to be annoyed with me.“

„Do I?“ his question caught you off guard.

„Well, I know that you hate me.“

„I don't-“

„And it's fine, really. I tried really hard to get you to like me because what Jungkook's friends think of me means a lot to me, but it seems like I did something that made you dislike me, so…“

Your back was turned to him, but just the sight of you curled up in the corner of the bed made his heart broke a little. The realisation hit him. You knew all along how he felt about you, but he never thought about how it made you feel.

Did he really have a valid reason to dislike you?

The room is quiet for a while and you thought that Jin has already fallen asleep, when his voice called you again.

„Did you really cry during Epiphany tonight?“ he asked.

„Yeah.“ you chuckled.

Jin doesn't know what moved in him or when it happened, but he had a sudden urge to hold you. Like he wanted to erease every moment he's been horrible to you with just a little touch.

So that's what he did. He hugged you. And you let him. Hell, you've been dreaming of it for a while now.

The last thing you heared before falling asleep in his arms is a heartfelt, guilty and honest apology.

„I'm sorry.“

And when the morning comes, Seokjin wakes up and watches you with hazy eyes. Your skin is illuminated by the morning sun and your face looks cute when you are sleeping. He woke up with you still in his arms and something about that thought makes him bubble up inside.

When the morning comes, Kim Seokjin can think only of one thing: How could he ever hate you?

#bts fanfic #bts au #bts fic #bts fluff #bts imagine #bts angst #bts enemies to lovers #bts e2l #bts drabble #bts blurb #bts oneshot #jin fanfic #jin au #jin fic #jin fluff #jin imagine #jin angst #jin enemies to lovers #jin e2l #jin drabble #jin blurb #jin oneshot #seokjin imagine #seokjin au #seokjin fic #seokjin fanfic #seokjin drabble #seokjin blurb #seokjin fluff #seokjin angst

[psychotherapyconsultants]

12 Things You Didn't Know About Milton H. Erickson and His Daughter Betty Alice Erickson

The impetus for this blog originated many years ago when I stopped at an all-night book store late one evening and walked away with a copy of Jay Haley's book, Uncommon Therapy: The Psychiatric Techniques of Milton H. Erickson, MD. That night I could hardly sleep as I read well into the wee hours of the morning. I knew that Dr. Erickson was doing something new, exciting, and creatively different than the rest of us. I couldn't wait until the next morning to ask one of my graduate professors about this master of psychotherapeutic intervention. As I shared my reading experience with my professor, he laughed and shook his head from left to right. He then cut me off as I was speaking. "Howard stop, listen, those eight psychosocial stages he talks about are totally useless when performing psychotherapy. Trust me, I've been doing counseling for years. Please don't waste another minute of your time on that useless stuff." I came away with two important conclusions. One, my professor clearly had no clue who Milton H. Erickson was, and wrongly believed I was talking about Erik Erikson. And two, for the sake of my GPA, I sure as hell wasn't going to point out his ignorance, nor would I share his thoughts with my Human Growth and Development course professor who thought the sun rises and sets around Erik Erikson's stages! In this brief blog, I am going to do a reality check and attempt to separate fact from fiction regarding this larger-than-life figure in the history of our field. Using 12 key questions I am going to touch base with the living person who knew Milton H. Erickson better than anybody on the planet—his daughter, Betty Alice Erickson. And, yes, she's a card-carrying published therapist who has conducted workshops around the world on Ericksonian therapy. She also served as co-editor with Bradford Keeney, Ph.D., for the book, Milton H. Erickson, M.D.: An American Healer, and she co-authored the text Hope and Resiliency: Psychotherapeutic Techniques of Milton H. Erickson, M.D. with Dan Short, Ph.D., and Roxanna Erickson Klein, RN, Ph.D., as well as contributing chapters and forewords for numerous books. Howard Rosenthal: Think back to when you were ten years old or so. If you had to describe your father in a few sentences what was he like as a parent? Was he strict, permissive, or supportive? Betty Alice Erickson: He was a typical father. He was too strict and not strict enough. We were allowed quite some freedom if we had demonstrated we could manage it. He stressed and valued hard work greatly. We always knew we were loved and he was interested in us and was proud of us. HR: So when you were having a problem or down in the dumps how would your father generally respond? BAE: This sort of goes back to the last question. Daddy was very clear that we were responsible for what was rightfully ours. If we had a problem, for instance, we would go to the home office door and stand. He was always working on something. He would finish his thought, and motion us to come in. Then we would shut the door, if we wanted, and sit down. He would then set his pencil down and from that moment he was totally attentive and helpful. When we had what we had come in for, he would pick up his pencil and say, "Anything else?" And that was it. I think this was a very valuable teaching. If you want something, you must ask or at least seek it. Then you get help or needed information or better understanding. But it is your job to ask for what you want. HR: Were you aware that he was a master therapist at a very young age and did that influence your decision to become a helper yourself? BAE: I am not sure any kid is really interested in their parent's work—unless they're participating in it. We used to read whatever he wrote, especially for the American Society of Clinical Hypnosis Journal, but only to see if he mentioned our names. As for me, I was a high-school teacher and gradually shifted into troubled adolescents—I even ran a self-contained school for the Department of Defense overseas, long before there were special programs for this. Later, I got tired of the increasing paperwork schools were requiring, so I figured out what I really liked—teaching and seeing people change and grow. I went back to school and became a licensed therapist and then a licensed supervisor. I have been lucky to have taught countless workshops all over the world—and I have never ceased to be humbled and amazed at how important and influential and truly "genius-y" Dad was. HR: In our field we always think of Milton H. Erickson as being a larger than life hero, but did he have any heroes growing up or when he entered into the psychotherapy field? Was there anybody who was a role model to him? BAE: I think Daddy carved his own pathway from the very beginning, and never varied from that. But he always made it clear he admired and respected honest, productive people who were open to learn more. HR: A lot of the textbooks imply that your father developed his keen sense of perception due to his health challenges in his childhood. Do you buy that position or do you think something else was going on? BAE: Daddy spent a year bedfast, paralyzed with polio, and had lots of time to think. He used to practice listening to people walk up to the house, trying to figure out—male or female, how old, who it was. Then when conversation began in another room, he would figure out if it were a social visit, if someone wanted a favor, who would be the first to directly address that. He never stopped practicing those type of skills. He began to move by practicing remembering how it felt to move his thumb and fingers together . . . and practicing that memory over and over until he actually saw a movement. He took off from there, with enormous dedication and even greater hard work. He had always keen visions of where he wanted to go in his life. With therapy, he did the same—what does the patient productively want? He was a farm boy, and would look at the "lay of the land," just as a farmer does to see if he can plant a productive crop. Then he would think about what he, and the patient, had to do to help get the best outcome. People call it speaking the other person's language; but it's more complex than that. In other words, he figured out where he wanted to be before he tried to get there. HR: Just like a child growing up wants to become the next Babe Ruth or Serena Williams, as therapists many of us still want to be Milton H. Erickson. Is that even possible or did he have special talents that the average helper could not ever hope to possess? For example, a therapist who saw your Dad performing therapy once told me it blew his mind. He said your father was such an adept helper it was like he possessed psychic powers or telepathy. What was the main thing that separated him from the average, everyday therapist working in a private practice or agency setting? BAE: Daddy definitely did not have psychic powers, and it annoyed him when people asked him that. But more to the point of your question, he believed people were too infinitely varied to be classified in any theory—certainly the kind of clients we usually see. He never forgot to listen to the patient and hear what he was really saying, which is another skill which he constantly honed. The more I practice, the more I recognize clients always tell you what they want, maybe clumsily, maybe hidden, but if you're interested and really listen without thinking about you, or how it fits in the theory you're constructing (or using), you hear it. That's one thing. Another is he truly cared about his patients. He was unafraid to tell them things about him—to share certain things about himself. Today that's often seen as a "violation of boundaries." I was once chastised by a supervisor because my client, a professional astrologer, asked my birth date and I told her. My supervisor said it was inappropriate sharing of personal information. Nonsense! That's merely human beings connecting. That human connection is absolutely vital to good therapy, to a good relationship. Last but far from least, he genuinely liked his patients. He recognized they had made the best of what they knew how to do, and they wanted to make themselves better—even if they phrased it that they wanted someone else to do something. You can't convey these kinds of connection unless you, the therapist, can genuinely offer yourself. It's a hard skill to teach because when you connect, you become vulnerable and many people don't like to be vulnerable. They mis-define it as opening yourself to personal rejection. But it's not. HR: As a therapist who used a lot of hypnosis myself I can't help asking: How does Ericksonian hypnosis differ from the garden variety practiced by nearly everybody else in the field? BAE: Michael Yapko once told me that Dad re-defined hypnosis. It isn't what someone "does to someone else"—it is a co-created relationship between two people. Most of his students understand and teach that. However, people who don't understand his work are often not real comfortable with a non-rigid pattern of hypnosis. Daddy also relied on a conversational trance, which is so so easy to create and has most of the attributes of a formal trance even though it is far more flexible. A true Ericksonian knows his unconscious and the subject's unconscious are integral parts of all trance states. Even more structured ones, as in pain management, have to be crafted with the subject in mind. HR: Did the textbook authors like Haley, Bandler, Grinder, Rossi and others get it right? I say that because I've have heard you hint in the past that some of the literature and workshops weren't quite accurate and might have misrepresented what Dr. Erickson was doing. BAE: Some of the them "get it"—many, many do not. When people try to make Daddy's work a 1,2, and then a 3 and 4 . . .it is not Dad's usual type of work. First, Dad's work expands available options. Word choices are extremely important because most words carry many meanings. It can be very direct, but it is also very indirect. It looks at the whole picture as well as specifics within that bigger landscape. The problem is the client's, the solution has to be the client's. Our skill as a therapist lies in creating the best, truthful, and most attractive options. With an expanded field of those options, most clients do the right thing for them. Most-- clearly not all. Then you have to do, say, offer things differently. HR: When you read about Milton H. Erickson you get the feeling he could treat almost anybody of any age, with virtually any problem. Today there seems to be a push for specialization . . . you know, a therapist has to be a specialist in suicide prevention to help suicidal kids, or an expert in eating disorders is required to help an adult who is bulimic etc. What would your father think about this model? Is it limited and would he think it is inaccurate? BAE: I don't know what Daddy would think. I know he totally believed that AA was an excellent resource for alcoholics, and he referred people there regularly, as do I. But I think he would think that this mini-specialization ignores that we all have experience with some level of most problems. There are some issues which probably do require specially trained people like a protocol for dealing with severe PTSD for recent trauma. But I know he thought problems are problems. We can probably help most people --while remembering to remember our own limitations. HR: What would your Dad say about the emphasis on big Pharma today? It is nearly impossible to watch a television show or pick up a magazine without seeing an ad for some sort of psychiatric prescription medicine. BAE: He definitely knew sometimes people need meds for mental health. After all, he worked at the Colorado State Institution for the Criminally Insane for his medical residency—long before psychotropic drugs existed. We older children also grew up living in state mental institutions where he worked early on—even we knew there are people who genuinely need something more than talk-therapy. But Big Pharma for everything?—the only truism about medication is that they have side effects which I think is sometimes forgotten. With that aside, how are we going to learn to deal with life, which is often not to our liking, if we only know how to medicate our discomfort, our pain away? We forget pain can be a wonderful teacher. Even little kids quickly learn that if you touch a hot stove, you'll have pain. HR: Okay, tell us something about your Dad we don't know that might surprise us. BAE: There has been so much written about him that I really don't know except trivial things like he loved limburger cheese which is the most terrible smelling cheese in the world and has to be kept in the refrigerator where it stinks up everything. Or, he contributed anecdotes for years to a "humor/human-interest" column in the Detroit Daily Newspaper under the name of Eric the Badger. He loved puns and, what all we kids considered, stupid jokes and riddles. And kept a little notebook so he wouldn't forget them, which I now have. HR: Eric the Badger. Wow, I'll need to check that out. Okay, I know you carved out 10 life rules from your Daddy's teachings. 1. Life is hard work. 2. Life is unfair. 3. Life is filled with pain. 4. Everything ends. 5. Every choice costs. 6. The law of averages is usually correct—that's why it's called the law of averages. 7. Change is the only constant. 8. It is what's in our head and heart that really matters. 9. What we receive in life depends on merit—and good or bad luck—or a combination. 10. Life was made for Amateurs. If you had to single out one rule that has been the most important in your own life what would it be and why? BAE: That is genuinely hard. The one my clients usually hate is #9—but it, like the others, is true. Dot.com millionaires worked genuinely hard, but had they been born five years earlier or later, they wouldn't have had such success. I guess the best for me is #7. Change is the only constant. This is miserable—it'll change. This is wonderful? Savor and love it because it too will change. HR: Betty Alice, this has been great. Thanks for sharing these gems of wisdom. BAE: Thank you! You've made me think and organize my thoughts as well as have even more appreciation for my good fortune in life. from http://www.psychotherapy.net/blog/title/12-things-you-didn-t-know-about-milton-h.-erickson-and-his-daughter-betty-alice-erickson