#u know the kind of fucked up Literature i mean!!!??? its good but i dont want to LIVE the existenital agonies. AND YET

[soldier-poet-king]

Read the conju novella on break and now diagnosed as gods saddest wet little creature. If I thought that it would alleviate my pining bc it's about found family and friendship and all those good things, now I'm just DOUBLY pining 🤡 he needs to be needed and I'm. I'm. IM.

#WAAAAAAAAA #wailing and wailing forever #the duality of fran #i should be in a shoujo webnovel romance power of friendship story #instead i am experiencing the agonies in a despairing book written by someone whos probably an alcoholic or deeply deeply unwell #u know the kind of fucked up Literature i mean!!!??? its good but i dont want to LIVE the existenital agonies. AND YET #bro why tf am i a kafka character and not a shoujo protag. i am so so so so tired and if no one holds my hand in the next year i am going #going to fuckin die of loneliness :))))))))))) #WHERE IS THE MUTUAL DEVOTION. WHERE IS THE LOVE AND EASY AFFECTION. WHERE IS THE FRIENDSHIP #yall i need to move out ik. #love (romantic or platonic) doesnt just fall into ur lap this is not a fairytale #and i NEED irl contact. unfortunately. i need to be loved in ways the internet cannot provide #no matter how much my beloved friends try to #and so. i need to move but i am so anxious and lonely and POOR and its just. fuck #why CANT it be a wondertale and something good happen to me for once #why CANT i be swept off my feet in a life defining friendship/partnership/romance #i NEED to be weirdly mutually devoted w someone. married forever and ever. like we can take or leave sex idgaf i need to be LOVED AND LOVED

[bull-shit-suji]

kuro modern au stuff that i word vomited into my notes app

kind of a Vincent summoned sebastian to save ciel so ciel doesnt actually owe sebas anything

amnesia? idk

single dad moment! except theres this other dad whos kinda find.. (cough agni)

i think vincent was like do NOT let ciel know ur a demon so sebastian keeps it a secret but he doesnt have a good handle on like. Humans. so he kinda does a bad job and ciel definitely knows that he's weird but doesnt say anything. will go out of his way to gaslight you when sebastian does weird shit because he thinks its funny

"hey uhh is your dad levitating?"

"no?"

"he's flying above the school rn"

"that's a bird"

u think suddenly being a butler is hard? have fun being a dad bitch

alois is there but thats complicated. claude and hannah are DIVORCED but on decent terms (i think claude is like. toxic alpha male podcast type guy) and claude sees alois on alternating weekends!

are they demons? i dont know

i think ciel and alois can be friends. platonically. alois would probably say yes if ciel wanted to be romantic but i Promise you he does not. they are just pals :)

im saying ciel has a crush on elizabeth because i can (she's not his cousin here). emo boy x sunny church girl. said sunny church girl has to ask the mcdonalds employees for the blue raspberry slushie they forgot to put in ciel's order because emo boy is too scared.

IM 13 EVERYTHING SUCKSSSSS

grelle is actually living her best life transitioned with anne so they are ciel's aunts on his late mom's side. i think grelle likes ciel. mom figure moreso than anne is.

ciel owns four bongs and definitely a vape or two. come on now

he's also probably got celiac and is lactose intolerant he is just a feeble boy i think

he listens to twenty one pilots. sorry! sorry.

ciel is goth alois is punk those r kinda just the rules

ciel is insanely smart top of the class this shit is easy for him.

yells at sebastian daily. figured out what happened with his real parents around the age of uhhhh 12 or 13? has been an absolute terror ever since

"it was really nice of your dad to bring cookies for the field trip!"

"i hope he fucking chokes on one"

"oh!"

sebastian and claude are pta rivals.

"is this lemon bread store bought? my, how... efficient!"

"you made these from scratch? i can tell."

"i've never seen an interesting looking salsa! very exciting."

ciel purposefully invites alois over constantly bcus it pisses sebas off. alois is Terrified of that man.

"go grab the chips from the kitchen"

"but... what if mr michaelis is in there?"

"mr m- you mean my dad? tell him he can shove a faucet up his ass"

"id rather die on the spot"

sebastian will yell at ciel and is maybe a little emotionally unavailable but he's trying!!! it's hard :(

does that Dad thing where he comes into ciels room and is like hey bud......... what r u up to..

ciel and seiglinde r also palls. the smartest people in school

lizzie is a JOCK. she plays softball.

alois is a theater kid come on now

ciel is best at writing and literature analysis, specifically fiction. enjoys history, language, and Some sciences as well.

nerd

au where myspace is still a thing ciel has a myspace account

he definitely writes shitty poetry

wants to major in business

alois is a glee and pitch perfect truther

#thats all i got #these thoughts have been roaming around my brain for a while so #here #please add more im begging i want to hear other peoples thoughts so bad #kuroshitsuji #black butler #ciel phantomhive #sebastian michaelis #dadbastian nation rise up #angi #elizabeth midford #alois trancy #claude faustus #hannah annafellows #grelle sutcliff #madam red #textpost #mine #modern au #vincent phantomhive #cielizzy

[kamoegoi]

Witch Theatre? :0 would u like to Expound?

oh hey sure!

me, from the future, after i finished writing this: oh god oh fuck im a rambly asshole and i put this underneath the cut

im pretty rusty all things considered and i dont think ive said this explicitly but my academic background is in english literature but within english literature i focused dramatic literature and within dramatic literature i focused specifically on witches and their potrayal on stage. i cant rattle off the esoterica like i used to but essentially the witch on page and on stage is the personification of a given community's anxieties and often in western literature of the anxieties associated with social hyopcrisies and, as one might imagine, socially out-grouped women end up being a pretty good vehicle for that kind of imagery. an an example i like to point to in western canon for its visibility and how explicit it is to these points, while notexactly my specialty because american literature is especially weak for me, is the scarlet letter because its a whole book about a woman suffering the punishment of a man's sin that he super duper definitely also commits but is still totally cool guys i swear and i think a lot of people have read or are aware of the general plot. in this example, they push her to the edge of town while all of them secretly continue to patron her to create a sort of ‘girl what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament’ type of  beat when they are literally all going there for her needlework. to those ends, we see the very basic theme of appearances vs reality re: social hyopcrisy, but its an extra fun layer of commentary on the community’s fears in that they revile her but seek her out specifically to embelish their own vanity (which is very on the nose for our contemporary understanding of puritans haha (wherein the text they are concerned with the appearance of virtue rather than actually acting virtuous)). so the witch in ficiton can often be portrayed yeah as sedentary because a witch who leaves the community who fears her forfeits the dissonance the community participates in that gives her power over that community in the first place. spoilers for scarlet letter, but the reason why i like to point to it as an example especially is because it really does insist on that single-placedness: in the end, neither hester nor dimmesdale can escape the puritanical rule that torments them to, in this reading, illustrate that neither witch, woman or otherwise closted as dimmesdale is, can ever really leave the seat of their power because without it they are a spooky scary reflection without the object thats casts them.

but also my head is full of fuck! and while this was my focus of study, i am by no means an expert (i actually went on to pursue education instead of getting deeper into literature or theater and that body of knowledge has waned even further for me relatively speaking lmao)! this is just one reading of literary witches that i am deeply fond of and is a very handy way to understand any (socially) isolated fictional woman’s role in a story. wrt to our blorbo in laws, consider this reading in context of say savathun or mara or eris morn and you see a lot of neat things that characters in fiction are afraid of. its also sorta funny to psychoanalyze the player base at times, esp wrt how mara is talked about at large at times (but again i cannot emphasize that i dont know anything and i know even less about social sciences and every part of history that i didnt specifically scrutinize for my own study)

[denkilightning]

@ horikoshi let him summon and control lightning you coward

aka denki headcanons

has a big black hoodie with 'your senpai's in my dms' on it + the exact same hoodie but with 'your senpai buys me food'

at first it was supposed to be 'your senpai calls me daddy' and 'your senpai calls you a whore behind your back'

he doesnt like all might that much. he himself describes it as 'its not that i dont like yagi-sensei, hes really sweet! like a kitty he makes you go 'aww' from time to time. but im very critical about all might. he has a god complex without brains to back it up and people just let him walk around like that because he beats up villains. and now we face consequences of that. so kinda yikes.'

he hates endeavor. endeavor hates him back. (this is a part of my bigger headcanon that denki hangs out with pro heroes a lot). denki calls him endeawhore. always. most people dont even notice. those who do laugh.

aizawa tried to stop him like once out of his own bits of dignity left.

has no sense of respect to authority. if he thinks you dont deserve rights you dont get those from him and thats it. and that means youll probably lose all your rights overall

hes really good at finding things. especially when things = information. especially on the internet.

hes very thirsty for knowledge. especially for knowing facts about his friends and other ua students.

so combining these two would mean that hes kind of a stalker?? but not really cus he doesnt make anyone uncomfortable and if he does he immediately apologises.

holds a grudge againts shiozaki but its mostly him being petty that they keep on getting put against each other ('LIKE WE GET IT. SHIOZAKI HAS A STRONGER QUIRK. WAHOOOOO GOOD FOR HER NOW SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT IT'). also she said few nasty things about his friends (about purity and other bad-catholic shit like that. she gotta work on that)

he roasts ectoplasm in daily basis (denkis fav hobby after listening to vinyls and playing on his nintendo switch is bullying adults especially his poor nerd math teacher). he thinks ectoplasms great tho and he roasts him as a form of affection.

he has real big opinions about classic literature

does (and in consequence, wears) make-up as a form of coping. he does baku's eyeliner too. and others people's make-too

his best(est) friend is actually bakugou but neither of them realize it so he thinks of yao momo as his bestest friend.

and before yall r like wHAT ABOUT BAKUSQUAD he considers them his family. his siblings. they all have accidentally referred to each other as siblings and it stays this way.

hes a rich kid. also he has an older sister (15 years older) whos gay and has a wife thank u very much. also he has a big family and him and his sisters are their generations gay cousins

is the kind of person who will say certain shit just to get a reaction out of people to get to know them better (which is canon imo but since well never really get inside his head who fucking knows HAHA)

his type is purple (jirou, shinsou and meat-loving senpai) (if you think i will ever bother to check his actual name youre wrong)

his methods of actual flirting are either being a really supporting friend or dissing the shit out of you every time he sees you

hes great at hand to hand combat. hes also a really great gymnast

aged-up headcanon: he loses his right leg in his 2nd year (the class thought he died there so imagine aizawa's and yamada's fuckin reaction).

also hes adhd and legally blind deal with it

and trans

#denki kaminari #trans bnha #trans bakusquad #trans kaminari #blind kaminari #disabled bnha #wiko.txt #*mine: headcanons #am too lazy to tag any other character in here lollll #edit: typos and added a sentence

[azrcxlfatale]

under the cut you’ll find saint’s intro, its just a brief run down for now until i get bio pages up but it should help get a sense of the boyo all the same !! he is gentle and friend shaped is all i can say ajjdfg. THIS HAS NOW BEEN UPDATED WITH LIKE FIVE EXTRA LIL MORE CURRENT HEADCANONS! [ they r just like for his own growth nothing major has happened with saint and he’s still fundamentally the same as he was bc he’s always been a more laidback and less tragic muse but feel free to read em bc they do help contextualise how he’ll be career wise and with grandmami] : 

   CHWE SAINT: 

so for the best part of his life saint was raised with his ‘grandmami’ as he terms her, but she’s better known to the whole island as ajumma solmi. for this reason he’s very doting toward her and a real grandma’s boy. he bakes with her often and they can often be found on street corners selling cheap priced but some of the finest flowers to the citizens because it’s grandmami’s tradition and its mostly done in hope to uplift the islanders and bring joy to their day in a small way and act of love. 

when i say doting i mean doTInG, he will help her in and out of chairs, help her cross streets, hold the groceries for her as she crosses, open doors for her even if grandmami insists he stops fussing because ffs saint ur making me look ancient and i’ll have u know i am still fighting fit and could knock any idiot on his ass with a fliCk of my finger. ajdhf. she is v fiery, if saint is like the picture of elegance and good manners then grandmami is the sTARK contrast. she has one hell of a potty mouth and just a no time for ur shit attitude. if anything saint is keeping her in line, not the other way around. 

his quirk is warp gate. he rlly just uses it to entertain himself mostly and help give his pals quick escapes when a prank of some sort has gone wrong. he can basically create portals out of a dark fog which can either be emitted through his breath or openings at the end of his fingers which he can activate, anyone can also use his portals to travel so long as he’s given them permission.

he just exudes sunshine rlly. is well known round the island for his out of this world smile which has been known to charm many. he is a very eligible and sought after bachelor but saint is like...not interested mostly bc he just like has no romantic awareness ahdhfhf not bc he doesn’t want it. and also bc he doesn’t like the way it’s mostly super young girls and guys just like awestruck by him. it feels a little too much like he’s a collective childhood crush by his groupies so yeah he is OBLIVIOUS. 

very humble and incredibly polite. just really down to earth whenever spoken to but being raised by an elderly person kinda makes u a little outdated, for this reason saint is kind of demure and bad at conversation mostly due to the fact he can easily talk for hours about his plans for baking with grandmami later, the book he read her this morning, the lovely walk they took in that gorgeous spot which he rlly recommends etc but he is god awful at talking about like typical young people stuff. 

lot of ppl think he plays hard to get, this is not true, saint just fr does not know how to fuckin speak and is the most oblivious person in the world to how to flirt, he’s easily flustered but bad at knowing when he’s being flirted with or if this person is just rlly nice and is usually too shy and respectful to rlly push luck by flirting in response hfhfjkg. USELESS. 

very 70′s/80′s aesthetic bby boy, sweet summer child. he is obsessed with old classic black and white films, had a collection before he moved to the island which he misses like everyday but luckily he has memorised ten million quotes. also collected records. obsessed with anything retro, is a collector of gaming merch. but he didn’t get to sneak much to the island :-( the only thing he rlly snuck was a small record stash. liked roller skating, bowling, drive in movies. dresses very retro but refined and classy with lots of layering. rlly good knowledge of classic literature. 

most likely to find him at the arcade in the funzone now on the island, he is a master at all the games but esp the old retro ones, usually goes early morning or late evening so he can spend hours uninterrupted on them and beat his high score everyday a bit more. if not there then he’ll be at zen’s computer gaming instead. he likes all tech really but prefers retro, he’s still figuring out modern. before coming to the island he was rlly getting into VR. if he’s not in either of these places, he’ll be on the beach in a volleyball match or doing a jog. still v much into his sports. 

ultimate sike power cause people think he looks like ur typical jock fuckboy but jokes on u he is pure of heart and dumb of ass himbo just blessed with ethereal looks, he is the breed of good lil boyo and that is all. 

obsessed with milkshakes and popcorn at the diners if he’s ever there u can guarantee that is what he is snacking on or treating himself to. his weakness is churros he fucken thinks that shit SLAPS. he’ll do anything if the prize is churros.  sMH someone help his diet. also loves fiddling with the jukeboxes there ajdjd. 

has two pet geckos one is peach colored and called zelda, the other is black and white leopard spotted and named zeus and he also has a chonk of a fluffy grumpy white cat called yoshi. he is the best. saint is a huge animal lover but probably still not on nyx’s level of dog worshipper. 

weeb. not as big of a one as nyx but he likes haikyuu, kuroko no basket, given, fruits basket, free! and yuri! on ice. he is very into anything that is slice of life or sports anime. 

has the nickname ‘koda’ bc of the movie brother bear, nicknamed after the lil baby bear cause he just reminds people of a baby bear ahdhd. 

he studies art, spends half his life in the studio working, big art nerd. once he gets in the work mode, he just does not stop for anything but water and snacks and goes at it all day into half the night. usually does big projects bc he loves a challenge. mostly paints, sometimes sketches. u know those vids of people mixing paint colors like a swatch of gold and turquoise? saint fuckin loves those so bad unf he does that all the time to calm himself. 

still lives with grandmami currently, he’s looking at getting his own place bc everyone tells him if he ever wants to have his own life then he needs to but he’s just v anxious about leaving grandmami on her own bc she getting older by the day and she’s all he has sO she cannot get hurt!! 

also in a bit of a dilemma with his art bc he kinda wants to make something out of it, like maybe teach some classes sort of thing and use it more as a career but right now he does not have the confidence in his ability and is mostly just doing it for fun and as a calming thing ( he’s an idiot he’s rlly fucken good pls someone make him take himself seriously )

never cusses but does say bitchin a lot, only ever uses fuck in bed basically so if u ever hear him say it then u know something next level has gone down bc saint refuses to swear even if he stubbed his pinky toe.

looks like a cinnamon roll but HE FUCKS!! boy is a kinky freak however saint has no shame or embarrassment like he will discuss it as casually as a discussion of what to have for dinner not bc he is like lewd but purely bc to him its rlly natural and like another form of art and he does not get the embarrassment or secret nature of it all like it is just factual to him that we come into the world like that and ppl enjoy it sometimes ajsj. 

gardening enthusiast!! has a fascination with studying plants and insects tbfh. still uses 70′s and 80′s kewl kid slang like unironically someone help him pls. sjjdjf. cute bonus fact: has freckles all over his shoulders and down his back. UWU. 

COUPLE OF CONNECTION IDEAS OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD??: 

i would love for him to have a muse for art and/or to be someone’s muse. also and maybe interchangeably someone to kinda be his art mentor and be like saint u could pursue this fr if thats ur dream, then do it pls share this talent dont let ART DIE!!

someone he does gardening and insect studies with who gets his nerdy enthusiasm over it. 

a regular who gets flowers from him and grandmami, maybe he makes a special bouquet for them every day which always has a different meaning in the flower language bc he is soft like that ajjfl

someone who he can take on loads of cute lil platonic diner dinner dates bc he is a huge foodie as we can tell. this one is super fun like I imagine they scam tf outta restaurants that are over priced and for the elite by being like we all kno married couples or people getting engaged, celebrating anniversaries etc tend to get better deals on their meals. so he’s essentially doing this one bc he likes ur muses company and enthusiasm for food but also bc it means cheaper high quality meals for both and a guaranteed good time.

someone to nerd out with him over classic literature or films bc that would be hella cute

maybe someone who is also close with his grandmami and rlly loves spending time with her as well so he kinda trusts them to take care of her and trusts their judgement when they r like saint chill let the lady live okay go and do ur own shit akskf

he usually jogs alone but it would be cool for him to have someone to do that with and like table-tennis and shiz cause he just loves fitness activities and active leisure stuff too. 

maybe someone who is tryna teach him a little more about how to uH TALK LIKE SOMEONE HIS DAMN AGE AND STOP BEING SOME RETRO MAN STUCK IN MODERN TIMES AJDJD

UPDATES:

so a lot about saint hasn’t overly changed because like he just is and has always been a very wholesome laidback boyo but just a few bits of like additional info for his personal growth can be added:

he’s owner and manager of the florist now, grandmami is also there most of the time and handles a lot of stuff when she’s feeling up to it but with her getting more tired more easily from her illness saint needs to head everything really.

he grew up in a neighbourhood on hosu which like consisted of his entire street pretty much being full of his aunts and uncles so now like it’s a street just littered with all his tiny cousins who like to follow him about everywhere and play ball games etc on the street with him and kinda take it over shs. you can hear their joyful playing from like streets over it’s very cute.

his mother gave him up when she realised she was pregnant with him and too young to raise him and that it would hinder her from pursuing the life she wanted with his father. saint doesn’t hold any resentment for her choice, it only bothers him that his grandma has always had a serious illness since the early days of talks of her having no choice but to take him on and that despite this his mother allowed him to be left to her care and another burden on her when she was already so ill.

grandmami is now at a point where she’s hanging in there but she won’t have long left and saint is essentially now her live in carer till her final days which is hard af for him but he refuses to let it show. he’s not sure how he’ll function when he loses her. right now he’s trying to extend the florist business into a wellness one as well and more of an apothecary so he can keep himself stable and busy.

this is more just a cute fun fact but he’s a Christmas Eve baby. uwu lil boyo was born on the night before Christmas bc of course he was sdjdj.

#quirks:intro #listen saint just makes me think of that fucken scott mccall meme #WHERE R U GETTIN UR JUICE SAINT??!! #HIM INCREDIBLY CONFUSED: MY GRANDMAMI DOES ALL THE GROCERY SHOPPING??? #SDJFJKF

[akechicrimes]

apologies for responding to ur tags in an ask of all things fdsjhfjs and thank you for the comment about the nature of confidants reflecting the kind of city loneliness id never thought of that and its really interesting but i just,,,feel like p5's cast re: their group dynamic doesnt do much to actually further their characters. theres very little main plot conflict besides okumura which is a manufactured one which opens up discussion for a divide or conflict in opinion (1)

[original post here] [my tags here]

omg dont apologize this all incredibly good!!! honestly right back at u because i hadnt really thought about what was so blase about the phantom thieves group dynamics before until you started pointing out the lack of conflict!!

i know i sort of semi-defended the value of p5′s social link system, but i’ve been chewing on the word u used in these asks (”stagnant”) so im just gonna, ramble a bit, and try and fiddle a bit with some of the stuff u brought up

the p5 cast seems to get along mostly without any issues, like some kind of super-happy idealistic-world friend group? and like all the things that you mentioned about all the potential problems they could have with each other--all of those are reasonable and interesting and definitely would be a thing in a real friend group!! theyre breaking the law!!! theyre doing shady and immortal things!!! there was a whole rule where they agreed they had to agree unanimously on whether or not to take a target out, and that rule never ONCE got used as a point of conflict. they never ONCE had a hung jury. everyone just agreed and hopped into the metaverse, despite the fact that the cast is, by nature, a bunch of kids with strong opinions on how justice should work. 

but it’s like, this is a happy group of friends!! isn’t this a good thing? isn’t this the healthy ideal friendship models that we should be seeing in our literature?

the thing that i think is interesting about ur post is that with the way u lined it up, “stagnation” is the opposite of “conflict”? which is a true fact that i hadn’t thought about before, and why it’s a shame that (as u mentioned in ur original post) that tumblr is so conflict-averse. because it’s true!! conflict makes things--and PEOPLE--move and grow. a certain amount of conflict is healthy.

in contrast to p5, there’s a basic general direction of p3 in which the group goes from being a bunch of kids who kind of dislike each other to a bunch of kids who would kill and die and live for each other. and it’s not a happy game? or a happy situation? it’s not a feel-good situation? they’re certainly not an ideal group of friends. mitsuru holy fuck why did you think it would be a good idea to hide that from yukari. shinjiro i know ur protecting ken but also you’re seventeen?? 

and it’s because things are so bad in the friend group, it’s because they’re fighting and making bad decisions and fucking up and doing terrible things and sometimes fucking up and doing terrible things so hard that two characters perma-died in the process, it’s because of these conflicts that they learn and grow and become kinder people. so when they finally achieve friendship at the end of the game, it feels fuckin worth it. 

like, i do think the phantom thieves are friends................ but is it a friendship that’s, uh, worth much? if they didn’t really struggle for it? if they never fought and had meaningful conflict...? is it a happy ending with joker and his friends going on a road trip if everything was peaches and cream with joker and co from the beginning?

i wonder too if that has something to do with the fact that p3 was like, the game that atlus made when they were sure that the persona series was going to be cancelled, so they were like, well, fuck it, we’ll just tell exactly the story that we want to, and stories involve messy conflicts and characters who we wrote for us because we wanted to see these characters struggle and be real humans. where persona 5 seems to have been treated as “we need to do everything possible to make as much money off this thing as we can,” so the characters are less characters and more... marketable dolls. a product shaped like a person to be sold. 

the fact that they’re dolls means that it’s really fun to play dollhouse with them, kind of in the way that people ripped the heads off their barbies and simulated various cultish murder dramas with their barbies. but the fact is that the p5 cast is... just a series of character concepts that never went anywhere because there wasn’t any conflict that could motorize it.

#mine #i think it's really interesting that like. when i was first introduced to p3 #my friend explained to me: so everyone has a shadow and without the conflict between shadow and the conscious self #you would cease to exist and fall into a stagnant comatose state #and i was like huh! that's kinda fucked up but ok #and now it's just even more ironic because we seem to have gotten rid of a lot of interpersonal drama in p5 #and behold!! a stagnant plot. #this is why i like takuto #son of a bitch is the only decent conflict we've had around here in ages #clouis-loumentine

[fluffyheretic]

I’m so fucking tempted to say “every single question with Kazushuu or Hitoshuu (except for the nsfw ones i guess)” But I don’t want to singlehandedly kill you

ok let’s do it

as a side note sometimes the answer is the same or similar for both ships just bc shuu is uh. the same person. but ofc not always

under cut for lengthhhh

1. Who makes the first move and how?

hitoshuu: normally im gonna say definitely hitori. he probably decides to be direct and just straight up ask. in iwasweetie au specifically tho i want it to be sweetie if only bc i need to make him get over his shit. he also asks “directly” but it actually involves a lot of stuttering and beating around the bush so it ends up not being very direct

shuukazu: im not sure if it would really be one of them specifically, i can see them as the “this kind of just happened” couple. maybe kazuaki is the one after several months whos like “so um… what are we…. lol………..”

2. Who is the most insecure and what makes them feel better?

hitoshuu: shuu, not that hitori is the paragon of confidence but shuus like “wtf hes the ideal young man and im Bastard Supreme but ok i guess”

shuukazu: BOTH LMAO but kazu is more vocal abt it and shuu is the Bottle Up EVERYTHING type

some good ol body positivity cuddle sessions work in both cases

3. Who is the most romantic?

anyone but shuu for obvious “i dont even know what feelings ARE” reasons

4. Who can’t keep their hands to themselves?

again anyone but shuu for obvious “i dont even know what intimacy IS” reasons but specifically hitori is just more confident and kazuaki isnt necessarily confident but is more just. shameless

5. Who says ‘I love you’ first?

not shuu for similar reasons as above. there’s a trend here, you see

6. Who would they ask if they ever had a threesome?

THIS is a CHRISTIAN blog

7. What do they get up to on a night out?

hitoshuu: going to dinner at a place thats nice but not TOO nice. like good comfortable atmosphere and good food but not posh

shuukazu: they probably just wander around, maybe go shopping, kazuaki keeps pointing out stuff he wants and dr iwamine “i dont know what to do with my money bc i dont want for material things” shuu just buys it for him. shuu please stop enabling him. stop it.

8. What do they like in bed?

hitoshuu: cuddling :)

shuukazu: snuggling :)

9. What is the most embarrassing thing they have done in front of each other?

i feel like shuu considers every single new couple-y thing he does to be the new most embarrassing thing he’s done. we’re holding hands? embarrassing. i kissed you? god now THATS embarrassing. you caught me wearing your sweater that you accidentally left at my place? well put me in the fucking ground thats literally the most embarrassing thing that ever happened to anybody. how dare i show sentimentality. despicable

kazuaki is similar in that he’s constantly one-upping himself and getting a NEW most embarrassing thing but his things include stuff like getting caught watching really strange anime and scream-singing pop songs and anime OPs in the shower

hitori probably like tripped on the sidewalk once

10. What two songs, two books and two luxury items do they take to a desert island?

these questions are difficult bc man idk what media exists in 2188 bird japan

11. What do they hide from one another?

in both cases shuus answer is “just about everything” hes terrified of the mortifying ordeal of being known. pretty much everything you learn about him has to be squeezed out

hitori hides how troubled he really is because he wants to seem like the responsible one everyone can depend on so that they dont have to worry about him. he does his best to hide when hes struggling but since shuu has that exact same impulse they pretty quickly start to see through each other, but are also very understanding about it.

kazuaki probably doesnt have as much to hide but he might be shy about portraying how REALLY in love with shuu he is too soon because he doesnt want to scare him away. he also hides the weirder shows and games and stuff that hes into lol

12. What first changes when it starts getting serious?

hitoshuu: i can see them having that kind of relationship where at first its casual and almost competitive in a way, like a “i think youre sexy and the only thing i know to do about it is see what i can do to make you flustered, then act smug when i succeed” thing. but over time when the novelty of that starts to wear off they both kinda realize they just straight up like each other and start being more genuine and soft.

shuukazu: again its a similar thing with shuu where he starts feeling more comfortable with letting himself be a little more genuine and START opening up. kazuaki picks up on this as a good sign and starts to worry less about trying to impress shuu and more just enjoying their time together.

13. When do they realize they should get together?

this is another one that i think is a similar answer in both cases, at least for shuu’s part he has a “dammit. i cant lose him” moment. since hes a person of very few words he tries to communicate “i want us to be serious” via letting down his walls a little bit, which hitori/kazuaki hopefully notice is happening and then are like “oh maybe we can work”

14. When one has a cold, what does the other do?

for shuu and hitori its “responsibly take care of you, bc its what i should do but also secretly i get STRESSED AS FUCK when someone i care about is sick so i gotta make sure youre okay”

for kazuaki its “take care of you, although i dont really know what im doing, also i thought since youre bedridden we could cuddle but its not as enjoyable as i wanted so like I’m Here but also im gonna watch tv okay? ill get u crackers and ginger ale”

15. When they watch a film what do they choose and why? Who gets the final vote?

hitoshuu: shuu’s gonna say he doesn’t care, but hitori also doesn’t really care so eventually he’ll get shuu to admit that he’d like to watch a nature documentary. especially if it’s marine-themed. hitori likes that too so hey there you go

shuukazu: shuu WILL watch the 76th pokemon movie OR ELSE

16. When the zombie apocalypse comes, how do they cope together?

hitoshuu: both are cutthroat bastards that do anything it takes to keep each other safe. their reliance and trust in each other is probably 99% of what keeps them going.

shuukazu: again shuus gonna do literally anything it takes to keep kazuaki safe, but to be real i dont know if kazuaki is making it out of this one. and if he doesnt then shuus not either.

17. When they find a time machine, where do they go?

shuu’s answer is going to be at various points in prehistory to study organisms that are now long-extinct (side note god thats definitely my answer too). his bf is worried abt the dangers but comes with him to make sure he doesn’t get into trouble.

i think hitori might not have anything specific in mind but going to historical sites in their heydays seems like a good choice.

since kazuaki likes literature he’d probably want to see historical stuff related to that, like seeing shakespeare plays when they first came out and meeting his favorite dead authors to ask them questions.

18. When they fight, how do they make up?

hitoshuu: hitori doesn’t like to dance around that kind of thing, after a little time has passed for them to both think about it then he’ll just be direct and say “hey lets talk about that thing that happened” if he feels he was in the wrong then he’ll then follow that up with an apology. i can see hitori being a little grudgy but then quickly getting tired of it and just wanting things to be resolved. shuu hates talking things out because hes bad at it but he knows its best so he’ll just try to explain how he felt at the time but also what he’s considered since then. even if he’s not good at explaining himself, hitori is good at understanding him anyway so they usually work it out pretty quickly.

shuukazu: they can be messier since kazuaki gets really emotional really quickly and sometimes says things he doesnt mean. theyre both bad at dealing with it afterwards though until after a few awkward days, kazuaki cant take it and is like “waaa i dont want us to be fighting anymore 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺” and shuus like “ok.” because yeah he’ll take the easy way out. they could probably improve their communication tbh

19. Where do they go on their first date?

hitoshuu: they probably decide to do something simple and casual to make it less awkward so they just get coffee. shuu feels like, from what he knows, that he should be expecting hitori to make a move on him. hitori doesnt because he wants to be considerate of shuus comfort level, but shuu takes it as a sign of disinterest. luckily shuu realizes hes wrong about that when hitori quickly invites him on Another date where they take a stroll in the park, and thats when hitori goes in for the tactical hand-hold maneuver.

shuukazu: kind of the opposite of hitoshuu in that they dont really declare it officially as a date. kazuaki just asks shuu if he wants to see a movie with him, not really calling it a date but kind of implying it to be one. shuu probably doesnt care about the movie but thinks this might possibly maybe be a date so he should go. kazuaki then uses it as a chance to Put On The Movies, as awkward as that might be, including the classic “stretch with my arms up and then let one down over your shoulders” move. shuu doesnt really know how to indicate his own interest in response but hopes the fact that hes also not complaining in any way gives a hint. despite it not REALLY being an official date at the time, later on theyll look back on it and decide that yeah that was their first date.

20. Where do they go on holiday?

shuu hates taking time off work, but if he must, then he’ll be content as long as theres something scientifically interesting there like a museum or an aquarium.

hitori doesnt really mind where they go, hes just grateful to get to go on holiday at all, so he’ll let shuu pick. and again, that’s going to be somewhere with a natural history museum, probably a very nice one and they’ll both enjoy it.

kazuaki is similar in that he’s just happy to be there but his ideal holiday destination is probably just…. akihabara. so shuu relents and goes there with him occasionally. kazuaki does like to visit aquariums with shuu though! they do both

21. Where do they get nervous about going with one another?

hitoshuu: the cemetery, at least at first when they arent used to being that vulnerable in front of each other

shuukazu: well shuu sure as shit is nervous about going to anime cons with kazu

22. Where does their first kiss happen?

in both cases, definitely at one of their homes, because shuus too much of a wreck to have a moment like that in a public place.

for shuukazu, i picture it that theyre just hanging out at kazuakis place and relaxing, and they end up cuddling a lot, and kazuaki kisses him kind of impulsively. hes then very apologetic about it before shuu manages to assure him that its fine.

hitoshuu, maybe hitori walks shuu home after a date and goes for the classic end of date goodbye kiss, but just on the cheek. then when once again hitori has walked shuu home, shuu wonders if he should expect a real kiss this time, but hitori goes for the cheek again. shuus disappointed and grabs hitoris sleeve before he turns away because he doesnt know how to say he wants more. but hitori takes the hint and kisses him for real this time.

23. Where is their favorite place to be together?

in both cases it’s at home, because shuu finds it much easier to be intimate when they’re in privacy. i think all three of them really appreciate just getting to relax together.

24. Where do they first have sex?

what did i say about this being a christian blog

25. Why do they fight?

usually its because shuu said something a little too tactless. hes not so clueless that he’ll say something really obviously offensive, but sometimes he really doesn’t know what’s too much. but his bf is hopefully understanding of this and corrects him Still Firmly but still with some “but i know you didnt mean it like that, we’re okay” way, because chances are he really didnt.

for hitoshuu specifically, hitori has to be on shuu about eating properly and can sometimes get kind of annoyed about it. shuus kneejerk reaction is to then be offended because hes an adult who can take care of himself. but they calm down and make up when shuu remembers that hitori just worries for him, and hitori remembers that shuu doesnt not eat just to spite him.

for shuukazu, i can see kazuaki’s lack of responsibility and aloofness start to get on shuu’s nerves, and when he brings it up kazuaki thinks he’s just being mean. again, similarly to hitoshuu, they get over it when kazuaki reminds himself that shuu wants him to be able to take care of himself, and shuu reminds himself as well that he can be too abrasive and should work on it.

26. Why do they need to have a serious chat?

hitoshuu: they dont have to right away but over time it would be good for them to be honest abt their respective traumas and the shit theyre dealing with instead of hiding it

shuukazu: similar, shuu should probably get around to being more open abt his shit. they might also want to have a talk abt what a serious relationship is gonna look like for them

27. Why do their friends get annoyed with them?

hitoshuu: i answered this already! but again, its bc theyre so ~responsible~

shuukazu: ppl either see kazuaki being super clingy and think “man hes so overbearing, his poor partner 😒” or see shuu being emotionless and think “man theyre so cold, their poor boyfriend 😒” actually they gotta mind their own damn business

28. Why do they get jealous?

hitoshuu: i feel like hitori actually gets hit on a pretty decent amount. shuu is never happy about it, but the death glares he starts sending usually scare the person off anyway

shuukazu: both of them think the other is too good for them so if anyone looks at them with even a little too much interest the other is immediately like “well i guess this is it”

29. Why do they fall a little bit more in love?

hitoshuu: little moments shuu loves is when hitori asks him how he is, how he slept. when he makes him dinner. hitori loves when shuu looks deep in thought, tucks his hair behind his ear, and he definitely likes to see him get along with nageki, which he does.

shuukazu: shuu loves when kazuakis eyes light up with excitement when he sees something he likes, especially when shuu realizes that hes one of those things too. he also loves kazuakis really nice hugs, especially when shuu just woke up from a nightmare. kazuaki loves how shuu listens to him intently, and asks questions about the things hes interested in, and sometimes rests his hand on him when hes getting tired.

30. Why does it work (or not work) between them?

hitoshuu: both are important figures in each other’s lives, obv shuu helped nageki but also hitori is probably the first person to get even a little close to shuu after ryuuji died. theyre both just pockets of trauma but are doing their best so it would be good for them to support each other and try to heal. theyre both pretty dependable so when the going gets tough they’re each other’s rocks

shuukazu: theyre definitely the “it will never work” couple that ends up working anyway. shuu might think kazuaki is annoying at first but if ryuuji is any indication shuu definitely seems to gravitate towards people who are more chill and even a little silly, and when shuu realizes that kazuaki isnt as dumb as he makes himself seem that helps a lot. for kazuaki shuu definitely has a ~mysterious~ aspect that draws him in initially but when it wears off as he learns more about shuu, instead of the magic being gone he just starts finding him more relatable and endearing so their relationship actually improves.

#hato #hitoshuu #shuukazu #shuu #hitori #kazuaki #kirogaraii #these were really interesting to answer #it made me think a lot abt the ways i think these ships are similar but also different #and how theres always one constant: shuu is a mess #but theyre ALL messes so its ok theyll be messy together <3

[thechocoboos]

Hi hon I know you have a specific list of ships that you write for but.. I was wondering if you would be willing to write headcanons for Igdyn please? Maybe even possible family headcanons too? I understand if you don't want to write that though if you can't, thank you! :3

I have never considered Igdyn before but this ask sent me into a hc frenzy, thank u. Wrote these about 20 mins after I got this ask and didn’t post until now, it was too inspiring ;-;

Hope u enjoy!!!!

Igdyn Headcanons

These two. i fuckin. swear to god, are the sassiest, most passive aggressive bfs to ever walk the earth

They sass each other nonstop 24/7, with teasing smiles and narrowed, amused eyes

But despite their snark, they are so head over heels that it’s ridiculous

Ardyn's terrible fashion sense is one of Iggys fave things to tease him about

Meanwhile, Ardyn's fave thing to tease Ignis about is Iggy's… interesting… hair styling choice

When Ignis is nervous about his workload, ardyn whisks him away on a day out and about to get ignis' mind off it, if it becomes clear that iggy needs it

The kind of couple that budgets together

"Hmm, darling, I think we should spend a little less on food this month… otherwise we'll never be able to pay off that credit card…"

"I beg your pardon? And buy frozen vegetables and subpar, on sale meat from the grocery store instead of the butcher???"

"I was suggesting something more like… Grade A meat instead of Grade AAAAA."

"Oh for goodness--fine. Only for you."

Ardyn tries to outdo Iggy's cooking just so Ignis can know what it's like to have his bf cook a delicious meal for him

He can never do better than Ignis' cooking but he comes close

When Ignis gets nervous or fidgety, he automatically starts adjusting Ardyn's many layers clothing

Ardyn ofc has everything the way he likes it already, but he knows it makes Iggy feel better so he lets him

Ardyn loves to style and adjust Ignis' hair, and Ignis loves to run his hands through Ardyn's hair in the evenings

They bitch about their jobs to each other and understand each other's complaints 100%

Worry about each other SO FUCKING MUCH but dont show it

they're both so C U L T U R E D

with ignis' education and ardyn's knowledge of OLD SHIT bc he's an old shit himself, they both debate and argue about classical literature, old paintings, and other such fine art like crazy

they like to have dates at the art museum and debate about the meaning of various art pieces

Ignis swears this one 2000 year old farm painting is about this one man's daughter, but Ardyn swears to the astrals that its actually about the artist’s sexuality

"Ignis, dear, I love you, but I MET that man. Never in my life have I seen a more closeted artist!"

"But this young farmhand in the painting--"

"Was his secret lover."

They both love ebony. And fight over it, all the time. Who's that last can going to? Probably not either of them with how intense their fight over it is

Coffee lovers. They set aside half an hour every evening to sit together, talk, and drink a new kind of coffee

It's their favorite part of the day

Their voices are soft and one hand is touching the other's as they luxuriously take long, lingering sips of coffee

No one knows how they got together but after seeing them interact, they all realize that it was the perfect match

The other bros all hated Ardyn when Iggy and Ardyn first got together, but over time they got used to him

Except Noctis, he's still not the biggest fan

Ardyn makes the coffee in the morning and Iggy makes breakfast

They love holding hands

Sometimes they wear each other's gloves. It's usually on accident but Ardyn likes to do it on purpose

Ardyn is a shameless flirt who blatantly whispers rather bold things in Ignis' ear in public, and it makes Ignis blush to high heavens

Iggy will always clear his throat afterwards and say, "Now, that was highly unnecessary, wasn't it?" (Ardyn disagrees)

Meanwhile, every time Ignis remotely does something to silently show his love, whether in public or in private, Ardyn is the one to blush and become embarrassed

There's more of an intimacy with it that catches Ardyn off guard all the time (especially if it's a soft kiss, a lingering touch, or Ignis initiating hand holding)

They accidentally got each other identical christmas presents two years in a row (last year it was matching pajamas)

Speaking of matching pajamas

This is the most luxurious couple you will ever meet

They're so classy that 200 year old dead pianists can't even compete

They have afternoon ebony from teacups with tiny cucumber sandwiches

Ardyn once bought Ignis one of those high quality, insulated coffee cups to keep Ignis’ beverages cold/hot at work (it’s Iggy’s fave gift from Ardyn)

Ardyn also makes Ignis’ lunch. He’s not too bad at cooking, and Ignis loves having someone take care of him for once

They lowkey nag each other but there’s no malice or anger behind it, just the teasing edge that they both love

Whenever Ignis forgets his lunch, Ardyn comes down to the Citadel and does his best to embarrass Ignis when returning lunch

He’ll always stop at the front desk and talk to the secretary about how his forgetful boyfriend once again left lunch sitting on their kitchen table

“I swear to the Astrals, that man would forget his head if it wasn’t attached to the rest of him--”

And then when he finds Ignis, he makes sure Iggy is in the middle of some kind of conference or dealing with people when he runs up and yells, “Iggy! Darling, you forgot your lunch! I made sure to pack extra smiley face cookies; I know how much you love them!” And just lays a massive kiss on Ignis

Of course, that’s all for show. Ardyn really brought his own lunch and is going to eat with Ignis on those days

It embarrassed Ignis the first couple times, but now he just goes with it. “Oh--those wonderful cookies with the pink frosting? Love, you shouldn’t have, I was saving the rest of those for your birthday, afterall, pink is your favorite color!”

Sometimes, Ignis forgets his lunch on purpose, just to goof off with Ardyn at work and have lunch with him (Ardyn is well aware of it, too)

They propose to each other at the same time

And ofc, it’s done dramatically and snarkily on both of their parts

When Ardyn went to propose, Iggy was already pulling out his own ring

They were both so close to tears that evening

#ffxv #final fantasy xv #ff15 #final fantasy 15 #ignis #ffxv ignis #ffxv ardyn #ardyn #ignis scientia #ardyn izunia #igdyn #jaysfandomcorner

[mistymark]

the one with the halloween party // z.c.l

zhong chenle x reader // 2.3k words // high school!au

“We’re enemies that coincidentally go to the same costume party wearing masks and I get to know you and I think I’m in love” // first bulleted au (?) // masterlist // part one of one // warnings: swearing, theres a party but its Completely Pure and Innocent, just fluff tbh

okay, so you and your friends are pretty close, sorta popular but mostly just really nice

so you get along great with almost everyone at ur school

and by almost,,,

I mean everyone except zhong chenle

dont get me wrong, the guy has great friends and seems pretty easygoing,,, but for some reason he hates your guts

which  is okay, cause you hate his guts too

he’s a bit of an ass to you and has been for a while now

would knock your book off your desk “accidentally” or kick your chair     constantly during classes just to annoy you

but you weren’t any more mature:

you’d stick your foot out to trip him up in the halls and remove the ink part from his pens just to have him experience an inconvenience for once in his perfect goddamn life

you were in competition constantly,,, and not the cute kind of competition,,

if you beat him on a test he’d be so annoyed, and would study for hours to make sure he beat you on the next one 

and  there were times when your friends and his would have to drag you away so  an actual fist fight wouldn't break out during one of your petty arguments during literature, when discussing the meaning of a particular symbol in a book

you were both so stubborn when it came to that, and neither of you would back down

it got to the point where every little thing he did pissed you off

laughed like he always does loudly?? pissed you off

sat down with his friends during lunch, making a face when he made eye contact with you?? pissed you off

seeing him flirt with random students in the year levels below you ?? pissed you off

“he’s such a fucking flirt, why does he have to lead them on? the poor things they just look up to him” “sounds like you’re jealous” “I am NOT     jealous”

“he’s just doing it to make them vote for him for president!!” “I thought     we discussed this yesterday, y/n” “we did but im still annoyed about     it... dont roll your eyes at me, I do NOT like him!!” “sure, y/n, sure”

anyway

a girl in your year decides to throw a fun halloween party, to get everyones minds off of school and exams and such, and you're hella excited like

opportunity to dress up in ridiculous costumes ??? hell ye

you’ve been planning your outfit with two of your friends for over a month, you've decided to go as the three musketeers (a reference to a book one of them has been studying in a class) complete with leather outfits, boots, swords, and for fun, masks

when the party is only a week away, you walk into ur lit class (ayyy get lit     fam) and chenle is sitting on his desk, talking to his friends about how     he’s got the best costume for Saturday night

you roll your eyes

he doesnt fail to notice

“hey, y/n, you going on Saturday?” “idk, are you?” “yeah” “then no”

you poke your tongue out at him when he flips you off, and turn your back to him, making yourself busy by grabbing out your books

his dumb (but a lot nicer) friends are going OooOoOoOooh and u feel a smug smile on your face as you pretend not to care

you hear chenle mumble a “whatever” as he jumps off the desk when your teacher walks in and makes his way to his own seat

luckily, you dont see much of chenle around school for the rest of the week, and when u do, its just giving each other death stares or glaring at each other from across the room

he did “accidentally” trip you while you were walking into one of your     classes

and you “just so happened to” pull his chair away as he went to sit down,     because your chair was coincidentally missing and you “didnt see him     sitting down”

he glared at you as he stood up, hand holding the back of his head as he     forcefully grabbed a spare chair and sat down

when Saturday rolled around, you grabbed all the last minute items you needed and drove to your friends house to get ready

“how do I look” “why? planning on impressing someone tonight ? maybe,,, chhheeeeeeeenleeeeeeeee”

you finished your eye makeup and tied the mask around you head, grabbing one of the swords from the bed and tucking it into your belt loop

“damn y/n, you're going to have guys fawning all over you all night” “maybe chenle will finally have the courage to ask you out” “SHUT UP”

you arrived at the party not soon after, and marvelled at everyones costumes

there were definitely some really good ones this year

after two hours, you found yourself standing by the drinks table, tired from dancing with your friends and having impromptu sword fights

“I like your costume!” someone shouted over the music

you turned around and it was,,

batman

nah seriously you couldnt tell who it was, but you knew it was someone from your year

“batman? wow thank you,, that means a lot, coming from you” you jokingly raised a toast

“shouldn't there be three of you?”

“the other two are off dancing, I lost them a while ago. shouldn't you be off fighting superman?”

he smiled and you felt like you recognised him, but u couldnt place it “already defeated him, look...” he pointed to the dance floor, where another boy dressed like superman was dancing “the only thing that could make someone dance that badly is if they had an injury” he     pointed at himself proudly “I did that”

you laughed and the conversation continued from there

you felt bad for not knowing who the person was, as he clearly knew who you were, and were too shy to ask, so you just went with it

“do you wanna go outside? I can't hear you in here” he shouted over the music, pointing to the door

you ended up spending an hour with him on the porch, picking out the best costumes, having playful arguments about their origins and which ones were more original, and you found yourself to be happier when you were talking with him than with anyone else there

you agreed on four of the top five most unoriginal costumes,, with the     exception being his own

“Im sorry, but batman is not original at all! there are at least three walking     around here” “so? theres at least three musketeers too” “THERE ARE THREE MUSKETEERS!! AND ONLY ONE BATMAN?!” you both began laughing at your own dumb arguments, and settled into a comfortable silence

it was getting pretty late, and the sun had well set, and you shivered as a     breeze passed you

without thinking, batman offered you his cape, wrapping it around your shoulders

you couldnt help but think he was flirting, and had been since you began     talking, and now had the strongest feeling that you’d developed a crush on someone

it was too late now to ask his name, considering you’d been talking like     you’d known each other for years the entire night 

when your ride arrived a while later, he was waiting with you and stepped back onto the porch as you turned away to walk to the car

suddenly, you felt sad that you’d have to leave this perfect night, so you quickly ran back, pecked him on the cheek and ran to your car without looking back at his reaction

when Monday rolled around, your friends instantly found you in the hallway, wanting to hear everything about ‘Batman’ and your bold flirtations

you’d stressed for the past two nights that he might not have actually been flirting with you, and you’d taken his jokes and friendliness the wrong way

but your friends had assured you he probably felt the same way, based on what you'd already told them

“ugh, and I just had calculus with y/n’s favourite person, and he would not stop boasting about this chick he’d met at the party. whats the bet he’s still talking about it when you both have lit with him” your friend laughed and continued eating her lunch

you had lit right after your lunch block, and when u walked in, he was smugly talking to his friends

he looked up as you walked past “y/n didnt catch you at the party, guess     you really decided not to come, huh?”

“?? I was there, chenle, or were you too busy talking chatting up that girl     you met to notice” you continued to your desk, but froze at the words of     one of his friends

“yeah, I thought batman wasn't supposed to fall in love”

you looked back at the group, and they hadn't noticed your behaviour, so you quickly made your way to your desk and flung your stuff down, grabbing your phone in panic

“im not in love”

you tried to calm yourself, there were more than three batman’s at the party, what’s the likelihood it was chenle you had kissed??

nothing to worry about

“idk man, the way you talked about her made it sound like you are” jeno laughed

“aNd tHeN sHe kiSSeD mE” jaemin mocked, making his voice higher

you buried your head in your hands

no  no no no no

no no no no no

nO NO NO NO NO

it could NOT HAVE BEEN CHENLE

you DID NOT kiss chenle

you did not KISS chenle

you did not kiss CHENLE

and then to make things better, one of your friends walked in

“Y/n! sword fight!” he grabbed a pencil from his pocket and pointed it at you

immediately you playfully sparred with him, before jabbing him in the stomach

“guess once a musketeer, always a musketeer” he mumbled, sitting in his seat, defeated

in your peripheral vision, you saw chenle’s head whip to you

“thats what you get for coming as a CLOWN”

you tried to keep your voice level and your head down as your teacher started the class,, but you couldnt help it

you snuck a glance towards chenle’s desk

he was already looking at you

fuck

you felt your eyes widen, and watched his do the same

there was something unrecognisable in his gaze, and you decided to focus on your work, dragging your eyes from him

when the bell signalling the end of the class rang, you haphazardly stuffed your textbook and notes into you binder and attempted to dart from the room,, but something held you back

or rather,, someone

you looked at chenle’s hand wrapped tightly around your wrist and shot him a pleading gesture

“not here”

he simply nodded and began packing his things away neatly

you waited, tapping your foot anxiously

you found yourselves sitting behind the school in awkward silence     (wheremystaysat) as both of you thought about what to say

“im really hoping your costume was unoriginal enough that it maybe wasn’t you” you said, shooting him a glance

he sighed at your words

“there were three musketeers, too” he mumbled, not looking up as he fiddled with his watch

that’s when you knew it was definitely him at the party

more silence fell between you

suddenly you took a deep breath

“I actually had a really great time on Saturday night” you said, glancing up to gage his reaction

you saw him smile a little “me too”

you felt a bit more comfortable seeing him smile, and it felt like you both     became submerged in memories, comfortably thinking in silence

“my favourite part was when you said goodbye” he moved his hands to either side of his body and leant back, basking in the sunlight

he had made a point of not looking at you, but he turned his head towards you and squinted after he had spoken

you tried to recall actually saying goodbye to him, but all you had said was “oh your cape!” as you handed it back to him and took off running to your car

when you pointed this out to him, he laughed and shook his head at you

“not  that part, dumbass”

suddenly his voice became quieter

“I meant the part where you kissed me”

you felt your smile widen into a grin “zhong chenle do you have a crush on me?”

his eyes widened as he turned to you “what? Of course n- maybe?” he looked at you sheepishly

you moved your hand over his, and he threaded his fingers through yours “I maybe have a crush on you too”

he looked at his watch again “look, the last thing I want to do is go to     class rn but I think Im already ten minutes late”

“shit,that means I am too” you picked up your belongings and walked inside with him, heading to your separate classes

“what do you have now?” he asked

“chem. You?”

“oh yea, you always have chem when I have calc”

“you know my schedule?” you blushed

now it was his turn to flush “maybe”

his classroom was down a separate corridor to yours, so when it was time for to split off, you said a quick goodbye and started down the hallway “ill catch you later yeah?” he bid you goodbye

thinking better of it, you turned around “wait!”

he stopped walking, looking confused as you ran back towards him

“I forgot” you said, biting the inside of your cheek as you approached

yes girl go get your man

you stepped onto your tip toes and pressed a kiss against his cheek, his mouth forming into a dumb grin as you stepped back

you turned around, ready to go to class for real now, when he grabbed your arm, spinning you around

he pulled you closer to him, his arm wrapping around you waist as he kissed your lips softly, quickly

when he moved away from you, creating a distance you only wanted to close again, he had the biggest smile on his face, his eyes forming little     crescent moons

“fuck, ive wanted to do that for so long”

this is my first bulleted fic, what do you guys think?? also,,, two posts in one day?? how blessed ?? I felt inspired a lot today, and the fact im working from home made me more productive (for fic writing not for actual work tho lol)

#nct #nct 127 #nct u #nct dream #nct dream imagines #nct imagines #nct dream writing #bulleted fic #nct fic #nct dream fic #chenle #zhong chenle #chenle x reader #zhong chenle x reader

[4lix]

restless nights; lee minho

[listening to] .... babybaby; suran 

Hi bubs, may I request a college au with Minho where the reader works at the coffee shop on campus (saving money because college is expensive af) and Minho having no sleep needs coffee, bus is awakened by the beauty of the reader?

can you do coffee shop minho but he’s like, totally not coffee shop material haha like he’s a dancer or something and school isn’t his thing and hes just really flirty?? if that makes sense????? thank you!!!! <3 

okay so these two were a bit similar

so me and my third eye decided to combine them 

bc coffee au x college au WITH MINHO? bitch its an experience 

so basically as the struggling college student you are who is living off of ramen noodles and the potato chips you found in the back of your cabinet last semester, you decided to get a job

but lets get real who the hell wants to work 

luckily the sweet old lady who owns the cafe down the block from your campus recently decided to go 24 hours

which meant more shifts available 

and meant you could maybe eat something besides ramen noodles and god was that a blessing. 

luckily you had afternoon classes, so working the night shift wasn’t an issue, plus it was only ever just you and a few customers, so the shift was quiet, peaceful, and you could get extra studying in when customers weren’t bothering you. 

for months working there it was peaceful, almost too peaceful, on the verge of being mind-numbingly boring

the only people who ever came in were miserable college students and old men who played bingo in the back 

until a week before finals, a boy who looked like he hasn’t slept in a billion years came stumbling inside, making all types of noise and heavy rap music blasting through his headphones, ruining the previously peaceful atmosphere

he doesn’t look like the type of boy to be in a coffee shop

he had this rugged look about him, hair an absolute mess and shoved inside of a beanie messily, his clothing a bit oversized and hanging off his body, and an adidas duffel bag alongside his backpack hanging off his shoulders 

probably an athlete of some sort 

he was your only customer you had all night 

the boy clearly lacked sleep, after he threw all his shit on a random table in the corner of the cafe, he stumbled over towards the counter eyes lazily meeting yours

as cliche as it is, the moment his eyes landed on your face, it’s like a surge of energy ran through his body 

he immediately straightened his figure, clearing his throat before trying to smile nicely, his previously pale face warming up to a shade of pretty pink

“h-hi..” he mutters nervously, and you greet him nicely with what you’ve been trained to say to everyone that walks in.

“hello! what can i get for you tonight? we’re doing a promotion for our night owls, free refills on all lattes after midnight!” you say with a bright smile and you swear you see him melt right then and there before he shakes his head and lets out of small laugh

“honestly, i don’t even really like coffee.” he admits and you turn your head in a bit of confusion

“so what exactly are you doing at a coffee shop?” you ask amusedly, and the boy with eye bags deeper than oceans looks up to meet eyes with you and maybe it was you melted that this time

he was... cute, dare you say the cutest boy you’ve ever seen, although you know most people wouldn’t consider this look he was sporting to be too attractive... i mean the boy had a hole in his shirt and his hair looks like it hasn’t been brushed in days

“well there’s one thing i hate more than coffee.” he says simply, taking off his beanie briefly and running his fingers through his hair 

and just fuck it killed you 

“it’s getting kicked off the dance team because i’m failing organic chemistry. also now that i’m here, a pretty face like yours is definitely a reason to stick around” he says with a wink. 

god where the hell did this boy come from 

it was ass o clock and he clearly hadn’t slept in what looked like days but the flirtatious parts of his brain were working harder than the u.s marines.  

you stammered on your next words, cheeks dusting a slight pink, “u-uh-””

“i just need something that will wake me up, i have a quiz at noon tomorrow and i haven’t studied at all, whip me up something real good yeah?”

in with that he drops a bill on the table, saying a quick keep the change babe before he winks one last time, turns around and heads back to his seat

well its safe to say your kidney imploded 

why was he so ridiculously attractive? 

you couldn’t even move for a few moments after he walked away, and you swore you heard chuckles coming from his corner of the cafe, the little shit was amused by it all wasn’t he?

shaking your head, you start queueing up an order for your favorite latte on the menu with the most amount of caffeine possible. the boy looked dead, he’d need lots of it.

how exactly were you going to even give the boy his damn drink

even pushing the buttons for placing his order had your face burning red 

nonetheless you make the drink to the best of your ability, never bothering to care about measurements but fuck when its a customer that beautiful? suddenly you love your job, call you the world’s finest barista. 

while the coffee brewed, you couldn’t help but gaze dazedly at the boy across the room. 

he came here to study but it looked like he was already knocked out cold, head resting in his arms, his face completely exposed and you just abashedly admired his charms and beauty from afar. 

when the drink was finally done, you almost didn’t want to move his figure, but if the mountain of papers next to his body was anything to go by, he needed to be up and working.

you nudge him slightly, “white chocolate mocha with five shots of espresso.” you state simply, proud of yourself for not stuttering

his eyes slowly open, falling onto you and the cup in your hands 

he smiles kindly at you, thanking you before taking the drink out of your hands 

“let me know if you like it, if there’s any changes you want made I can fix it no problem!” thank goodness for all the training and practice you’ve had saying your directed lines, if it wasn’t for the training you’d probably be stumbling over every syllable. 

he takes a sip, and instantly his eyes widen.

“woah, i don’t even like coffee, but this is fucking amazing.” he compliments and you smile at him gratefully before taking your leave back behind the counter

the rest of the night is slow, just the sound of the boy typing away at his computer and the occasional turn of a page as you try to cram through reading a literature essay. 

“ahem”

you look up, it’s the boy again, a mischiveous smile on his face 

“could i get that refill?” he asks but there’s a lilt to his voice, something that makes you feel like he’s onto something, but you just nod regardless, turning around and whipping it up for him

he takes it thankfully and winks again

you go back to your essay 

fifteen minutes pass, and you hear footsteps walking towards the front counter again

“refill?” he says with a grin and you tilt your head slightly, “i just gave you one?” 

“i already finished it, it’s free refills after midnight right?” 

“well yeah but-”

“okay so i’d like a refill on my white chocolate mocha latte with five shots of espresso.” he says with a stupid grin and you find yourself getting slightly annoyed with the boy and his antics but nonetheless you turn around and prepare another drink for him

this goes on for another hour

you’ve made him like eight drinks

and god knows how he hasn’t exploded from all the liquid in his system

it isn’t until 4am, just an hour before your shift ends that the boy finally rises out of his seat, nine drinks later, stretching 

he begins packing up his stuff and you can’t tell if you’re relieved or kind of upset that he’s leaving. 

he stops by the counter one last time before he goes, sliding a paper your way 

“y’know i ordered all those drinks in hopes that you’d write your number down on one of them, but, seems like you didn’t get my drama reference.” that dumb smirk is back on his face and your face is burning up again, a laugh slipping past your lips

“instead of abusing me at work like this, you could’ve just asked for my number, you know that right? i went through like a pound of coffee beans and a carton of creamer because of you.” 

“and to think every cup was delicious to the last drop... you need a raise, really.” he slides a piece of paper toward you, “text me and maybe i can make you coffee next time?”

“you dont even like coffee, do you even know how to make it?” 

“i’ll learn.” 

“just for me? wow what a charmer you are.” 

“i get that a lot.” he winks 

“is your eye okay? you’ve winked like fifty times tonight.” you tease

“technically it’s morning.”

“technically you’re irritating.” 

he chuckles at your sassiness.

“you’re cute. ... y/n?” he reads your nametag 

“hate to say it but you’re kind of cute too.....” you hesitate for a moment, realizing you dont know his name

“minho, lee minho, i gotta get going, but text me, or else i’m coming back here tomorrow and i’m gonna order a hundred cups this time.” 

“i’m going to ban you from ever coming back to this cafe.”

“you’d never.”

“what makes you so sure of that?”

“well, if you did, who would you stare at all night if i wasn’t here?” for fucks sake he winks again and even makes a kissy face before throwing his backpack over his shoulder

“text me!” is all he shouts before leaving and you cup your face trying to calm the heat in your cheeks

you do text him, in fact you talk for hours, but he still decides to come to bother you for another night and it seemingly never ends as minho becomes a regular at the cafe.

you aren’t complaining though, the night shift isn’t so lonely with him here. 

let’s talk! („ᵕᴗᵕ„) [cc] https://curiouscat.me/chansmaid

[twitter] https://twitter.com/9lovelys

#minho #lee minho #lee minho imagines #lee minho scenarios #lee minho requests #lee know #lee know imagines #lee know scenarios #lee know requests #stray kids #stray kids imagines #stray kids scenarios

[merlinthoughts]

Season 1 Episode 2 - Valiant

- ik for a fact that this one is the episode with the asshhoole. not bc i recognised it from the title but perhaps it was because i recognised it from the title u got me there

- i always go to mr clean too when i want protection, val, ur not alone

- yeah, this is harry potter l ma o

- the next thing u know theres a stone that makes arthur live forever and the snakes start joining into one and growing bigger until a phoenix (im dibbing on kilgie here), pops their corneas out

- DAMN DON'T KILL UR DEALER WHERE U GONNA GET THE NEW SHIT FROM NEXT TIME SMH VALIANT

- okay but who names their son valiant

- he was probably named valerie and didnt like it so he said “woah imma be valiant like courage, thats sick”

- that was probably his superhero persona as a child ngl

- no, shev, no respect for val stop doing this

- merlin in armour, what a fucking bLESiSNG GIVING ME THIS RIGHT ON THE SPOT BBC KNOWS WHATS GOOD

- ok a y but hear me out, merlins a servant. i have not seen any of these servants been asked to train with the royals??? like in the sense where it helps the servant train as well?? and the FIRST thing arthur does with merlin as his servant is train with him. not only is arthur a huge JOCK, he’s not using his manservant properly

- neverfuckingmind “most servants collapse after the first blow”, so it seems to be arthur likes to train with his servants. now that in itself is a question to be asked, but is he the only royal who trains with his servants??? how did this man survive on his own without a personal servant until merlin??? did he have a personal servant??? was it just regular servants?? who are those other servants he trained with??? did arthur just say hey lets go to the field in the morning, put on armour and let’s have a fun time?? UNLESS merlin literally just took someones job away from them kmao

- also my mind went right to the gutter guys, ngl, it sounded like an innuendo. it had me quaking i wish i was one of those servants

- “we all have our duties, even arthur” “it must be so tough for him, all the *hesitates* girl, all the glory”

- so we probably get at least 1 out of every 2 episodes where there’s a scene with merlin dressing arthur in his armour. bring the popcorn, lads.

- MORGANA LOOKING LIKE A FRICKEN SNACK

- the reigning champion is arthur, wonder fucking w h y

- valiant is in fucking mustard, while arthur is fucking ketchup idk why i thought of that but it happened. my literature teacher always told me to look for symbolisms. guess we found one guys.

- merlin after hating on arthur for the past episode is literally just cheering arthur on like a good husband he is

- did ARTHUR JUST SNICKER AT MERLINS “CREEP” LMAO DON'T TRY AND HIDE IT BY HUFFING AT HIM AFTERWARDS YOU FUCKING GOOF

- omg he hid it by telling merlin to do a full novel of chores

- AND MERLIN DOES IT WITH MAGIC A PAIR OF GOOFS

-  “are you using magic again” “no” merlin ffs he just saw you use magic, while the items fell and landed right in front of him while you didn’t move at aLL. they are nOT BLIND

- “very aggressive style” I MEAN SURE UTHER

- valerie be fuckboying morgana lmao with a “i saw you watching” and a, “then i will give everything to win the tournament”

- i wish this show was set in the early 2000s so i can see val in low sweatpants, a backwards cap with gelled spiky hair and cheap neon sunglasses (maybe even some gold teeth just for kicks), while hes trying to rap 50 cents or make a mixtape of brit pop songs. bc yes.

- honestly im loving my 2000 fuckboy au. gonna make an ao3 after this.

- of course merlin would be the one to find out the magic shit in valiants room, it just lures him. AND OF COURSE VALIANT IS THERE

- i'm so fucking glad arthur looks confused as to how merlin did what he asked. when u have this kind of hubby, arthur, its amazing what things he can do.

- i dont know why theres dramatic music as merlin put armour on arthur but im living for it

- “is it my imagination or are you beginning to enjoy yourself?” merlin doesn't know what to say to that bc he’s turning gay and doesn't know if that counts as enjoying oneself when the one you are gay for is the asshole prince

- typically enough, valiant and arthur never fight except for the finale. like with all conveniences in place, youd expect them to have at least fought at some point with as much knights as there to determine the final two but no, just the finale. k.

- this poor fucking purple knighted bloke didn’t need to be fucking demonstrated on, val. like you didn't need to kill him?? that could have blown ur cover

- DID NOBODY SEE THAT??? DID NOBODY SEE THE FUCKING SNAKES???

- oooh merlin found out what happened everyone gonna be fucked. nobody harms arthur is he has something to say about it

- if someone starts off a sentence with “i just saw someones snakes on their shield come alive” nobody would fucking believe you, merls. but given the fact that magic exist… mhh maybe it wouldn’t be too absurd. but ppl apparently are thick as hell

- “why were you in his chambers” well i know how id explain if i was in valiants chambers ;)

- jk i dont fall for this toxic shit

- imagine getting paid as an actor just just lie down there like this poisoned kid. “yeah, id like to audition for ewan’s role???” “why are you lying on the ground?”

- i hate those tropes where it's like “i know how to tell someones bad, here’s proof” and then nobody believes you and tells you you’re lying and should die or whatever but then you kNOW IT'S THE FUCKIN TRUTH BITCH that trope gives me damn anxiety >:((

- yes merlin, fucking slash the shield with your sword. i'm sure that's how it works. im sure it will kill the snakes.

- HOWA RE THE SNAKES ALIVE WITHOUT VAL SAYING “ISHNAHASHAHI”

- i think val would know that you cut off the snake’s head, merls, just saying. ur were the oNLY ONE.

- TELL ARTHUR WHAT??? “I CUT A SNAKE”

- EXACLTY ONG THAT'S WHAT MERLIN FUCKING SAID I WAS RIGHT LMAO

- ARTHUR BELEIVED HIM I'M FUCKING LIVING BUT IK WHAT HAPPENS AND AHH

- uhhh the anxiety is rolling up boys

- ewan is mcfuckingdead

- snake be sliding in like a hoe on a business

- bfehfjdjfskf i hate this part

- arthur's pride, merlin’s pride, fuck me

- i'm not even gonna write this part, it breaks my fragile heart when arthur sees the look of people not believing him, especially his dad, and merlin seeing how arthur doesn't trust him anymore like prepare the eulogies girlies

- okay but if arthur is struck and gaius has the antidote?? arthur aint gonna die technically

- but now val knows merlin knows

- AND MERLIN INTERVENES

- why are royals so bitchy towards servants. like they do their best to help you??? they are loyal to you and are paid there to serve you and are often very kind, generous, passive, understanding people??? yet merlin interrupts uther and he fucking sends him to the pit

- VAL YOU ASS LMAO DON'T HURT MY SON’S PRIDE

- he said allegations like four times, yes uther we know ur vocab is shining with intellect but seriously, there’s other synonyms that could still be acceptable and still sound fancy

- quick search on google bc my mind doesnt roll fast enough: claim, assertion, charge, accusation, declaration, statement, contention, deposition, argument, affirmation. see daddy uther, not hard to look up.

- forget they didnt have internet whoopsies

- :((( arthur doesn't trust merlin anymore

- the husbands FIGHT

- not just a banter petty fight, this is a huge fight

- SACKING MERLIN DON'T FUCKING SACK MERLIN YOU GOOF

- TRUST UR HUBBY

- FUCK

- I'M GONNA CRY AND IT'S ONLY EPISODE TWO

- I'M HAVING EMOTIONAL PROBLEMS CONCERNING MY TWO BOYS

- GUYS IM NOT OKAy

- its been 2 minutes after i wrote that last sentence, and i am now okay

- “a half cannot truly hate that which makes it whole” iconic as hell. so many things could be said about that quote. either for innuendo purposes, love purposes, destiny purposes, how long it took me to say it right, just so many purposes man. it’s just iconic.

- merlin looks absolutely done with kilgaharama’s shit

- “just give me a straight answer” seems like kilgarass here is being too gay for merlin

- gwen already knows merlin’s the heroin of the series, saying everyone knows it's merlin who will save the day. but same tbh

- i dunno if this is like me or not but it says her nickname is gwyn in the subtitles but im typing it as gwen which i thought was how u wrote it, even if her full name is gwynevere but like gwen has a ring to it while gwyn sounds like gwin or smth and i dunno which one is right so ill just leave it alone ahjsjfk

- MORGANA HAS VISIONS WE ALREADY KNOW WHERE THIS GOES SHES MAGIC ISNT SHE HAHAHAHAUHD

- merlin trying one last time to convince his husband not to die, but at least this time arthur knows he’s up for val’s magic and is like “k iloveyou but i have to do this for the country not just bc of pride and thinking val is not magic”

- staring into the fire like he’s hoping it would suck him up into the void, not only is merlin a now confirmed emo, so is fucking arthur it seems. perfect for one another i'm telling you

- eerie music as morgana enters… wha suddenly i can't read

- i thought at first morgana and arthur were gonna end up together cause of the fucking weird tension going on and i was prepared to be disfuckinggusted but no! the show and producers actually put my expectations away and helped me see that it wasn’t going in that direction! thank fucking god! 

- k but arthur looks majestic in his gear im just a huge bi

- “don’t go into my room” he says then gaius peaks in and almost gets mauled by a large chihuahua

- me too val, id step on someone's toes then fuck them up with an undercut. thats the bad bitch way to go. unless it for arthur, then val hahaha you can go fuck yourself

- no one sees mErLin??

- but they now see the snakes smh fakes

- “what are you doing? i didn't summon you” i don't think that will work val cause you didn't say it with a serpent tongue, it has to sound more like “shhashhwhat ahhssare hiisssyou iisshhaadoing?”

- okay but i thought arthur was impaled for a half second until he started to talk then i screamed that he was aight and he would now believe merlin

- uther better give merlin an apology

- arthur just said he wouldnt

- but still uther BETTER APOLOGISE TO FUCKING MERLIN

- “yknow i wish valiant was escorting me” “me too” i thought for a fricken moment arthur wished valiant would have escorted HIM. i'm dying.OMG

- “i wanted to say i made a mistake. it was unfair to sack you.” “don’t worry about it. buy me a drink and we’ll call it even.” DID YOU JUST SAY WHAT I THINK YOU JUST SAID MERLIN YOU SLY DOG OMG

- “i can’t really be seen to be buying drinks for my servant.” so if he wasn’t ur servant?? you’d say yes?? they are so fucking gay i can't anymore

- yeah, i literally fucking can't

#merlin #merlin bbc #merthur #s1 #this is early bc well it was already written #peeps up for the next one boys #tho its not done #expect it in a few days oop #s1.2

[loyalbreed]

M Y    G A W A i N     V  S   whatever the fuck people think about him. Im throwing hands down in this post so lets go. A few things before we begin, there are no real canonical?? Ages--to be honest I find this to be debated rather widely. I always hc Gawain to easily be my own age in his Mid 20′s due to where it is he is taken in life. I’m going to apologize in advance the names of some people slip past me, as someone who works 40 hrs a week and is trying to research other things at the same time!! My ability to retain information isn’t as good as I use to be. FURTHER there are many iterations always of the Arthurian Legends. As well as mass amounts of thesis and research material, this is my own pull from reading what I have. O O 1 .  ( This may be a bit touchy please read at your own risk! ) The Tale of the Green Knight is a story about Gawain more or less finding himself. He is youthful at this age in my interpretation he’s roughly in his teens. My biggest gripe and interest in this is the whole Ordeal with The King  ( Bercilak ). Gawain asks to say in his castle for the time being, waiting for his challenge etc. Bercilak agrees on one condition, whatever gifts he receives that he must return to him by the end of his stay. My  G R i P E and own individual interpretation which imo heavily reflects his personality as of now when dealing with women. Is ONE OF HIS GREATEST challenges in this story is his plight with Chasity. Gawain had that more or less taken by him, pushed and pulled--forced on him to think about. The Grand Ol’ King sends his wife purposely every knight to Seduce Gawain. Who refuses her, where he often times is just there sitting. Admitting that she is most beautiful and coaxing his nerves that he finds her most darling. She pushes himself onto him time after time. Night after night. And he is subjected to this. In some narratives it is him desiring her back but making the choice not to because he knows it is the right thing to feel. In others he is most uncomfortable, where its described she is kissing him where he is just there feeling it.  What  i m p o r t a n c e  does this have? A lot actually;  Imo Gawain is a victim in this story. First of all he is unacknowledged that in some cases his own damn mother put this all together. To ‘Challenge’ him as a man and a Knight. Forcing a woman onto him to test his ‘Chasity’--which if we all Know Gawain is thrown out the window as he often finds himself wooing women and before the battle of Camlann comes to Arthur in a dream surrounded by women. However he is forced into this subject at the beginning of his ‘Youthful’ endeavors as ALLOCATED in the story this is PRE KNIGHT Gawain this is one of is basically the story that makes him who he inevitably becomes!! So yes this is established in a air of his youthful tidings.  Also I think this is a great underlined issue on how people don’t think men can suffer the same things women do when they are forced into sexual situations they dont want to be. Hey so lets remember that.  ALSO HEY, afterwards he is put in situations afterwards where women are woo’d by him most easily. Want him. Desire him. Etc, I do not recall reading a moment where he was ever quipped with the desire of WANTING someone himself. Not at all. He loved and enjoys women, but there was not entirely a moment where he himself pursued anyone specifically? If there is I’ve yet to read it and there are far more times where the latter is true. Take the story of Ragnell, Arthur fucks up and in order to save his ass he needs basically to ship his favorite Nephew ( GAWAIN ) off to some old hag lady. Gawain much obliges, he understands and loves his King. Admitedly doing anything for them. The story of Ragnell is great I’d love to write a meta( like with the Green Knight )about that but rn, the point is. Gawain didn’t want to marry her it was an arranged marriage. So when he comments about having left his marriage behind and wishing to pursue women freely again. Like at least he knows what he wants? 10/10 .                 And ontop of that, despite it turning out all well in the end. Gawain was the MOST hospitable husband. He was loyal to her. He loved her. He respected her. And he made damn well sure he was the man he need be for her. It’s stated time and time again that Gawain was a Knight established with this romanticism about him. As if to say he was more or less the ideal Knight for women. This is established more in all sorts of literature as he is always very endearing toward standing up for women. And believing in what women do and their own choices. Further I stated that Gawain never truly pursued women and was always swept up by them in text. Gawain is use to making women happy, when he is around he is most pleased to make them smile. To see them smile. He is around women and they ARE ALWAYS happy. That is just how it is-- FOR ME I INTERPRET THIS as a means that he MUST ALWAYS make women happy. He almost sees it as a job or a conditioned fault of his that he must do. And if he fails--then this is bad on him as a knight and as a person. It is sad in a sense that with a lot of his literature imo it comes off this way, that he just need be this way. he must always be the Knight whom women most love and respect. But what does this have to do With N A S U ‘s interpretation! Actually a lot!!!!!!! I love Nasu’s version of Gawain its rather spot on save for a few sexist things that I feel are a matter of cultural differences. That could easily be omitted and chalked up to Gawain being an idiot, rude, Blunt more likely, or just daft. Most of his rude comments are almost always because the other person has done something that he himself feels its warrant by to say. Where as someone may state ‘well you should know better.’ Gawain would out right tell you, ‘You were stupid and deserved what happened to you.’ As such is the difference, Gawain calling Nero a Whore despite being an adversary of women in arthurian legend marked me as odd??? For Nasu to do that, something I kinda was like mmmmmmmmmmmm. I do not agree, but then I remember how hot blooded Gawain actually is in Arthurian Legend. He has killed people for lesser reasons, started fights because he didnt get his way, and ultimately was a bit??? A brat. So him being mad and choosing the route of acting like child and making rather uncomely comments could make complete sense. Im down for this aspect / interpretation of Gawain. Even the comments about breasts and constantly having a taste or judgement of women. Which makes me laugh because I joke he is a fuck boy cause he kind of is? But he would never? Like he might tell a woman ‘You are not my type because I like this type of women.’ It would not be to insult them but to make that evident! But in my interpretation I make it that he has fetishes ( big breast etc ), but would genuinely adore all types of women. Also that he would be a bit dejected and confused if a woman denies him but he wouldnt be so much as--harmed by the ordeal?  Tbh hes more like THOR so I append any comments I had jokingly though Gawain to be mildly sexist. It really isn’t that he is not purposely saying bad things, he genuinely likes women. Wants women to be women and do women things. HE just knows what he wants. Likes what he likes and !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE WOULD PROBABLY TAKE A YANDERES LOVE AND BE LIKE???? OH SHOOT YOU WANNA KILL THE PEOPLE I LOVE??? I UNDERSTAND U ARE MOST EXCITED BUT I BEG OF U TO CEASE AT ONCE! Also if they kill him hes just like ‘well u are most welcome to try ma’dam.’ GAWAIN STRAIGHT UP WALKS IN ON BRYNHILD AND SIEGFRIED--WITH BRYN HAVING TIED HIM UP AND STRAIGHT UP WAS LIKE oh this is normal I apologize for intruding. As wel las Hakuno and Kiara--like Gawain is just stupid/daft/is chill with a lot. Which honestly if you put in aspect of a lot of the things with what I said prior. It can all tie neatly over and make a lot of sense.  Okay I think Im done venting/talking about him in this aspect!! I don’t condone his rather shitty words he’s an ass and says a lot of stupid shit. But I enjoy that he has personality--like dont get me started on his loyalty. This was about him + women + his lore and how this effects my interpretation thanks for reading.

#long post #long post /// #fuck u im not readmoreing it #i love gawian hello #「✱《 𝓢 𝓱 𝓮 s p e a k s 》 ᵒ ᵒ ᶜ」 #「✱《 𝓻𝓮𝓲𝓷𝓼𝓽𝓪𝓽𝓮 》ʰᵉᵃᵈᶜᵃᶰᵒᶰ」

[survivor-iceland]

Ep. 2 - “I will not be a little tea pot this time” - Ellie

dylan r

OKAY! New game! I’m excited to start! I’m just kinda trying my best to socialize, I’m horrible at talking to other people, my plan early is usually to just win tribals and form small connections with people 

Although I flopped SO HARD during that challenge it’s unbelievable I literally tried that for hours & I couldn’t do it like literally 

Not much else, I’m just kinda vibing. 

Jack

So Ellie totally spilled that she's gonna send stuff to our tribe so i'm telling my tribe that. I think raffy is gonna do the same. Also im thinking everyone on one so that we mess with them.

Jack

My audio is going crazy and cutting out and im like AM I BEING SPOKEN TO????!?!?

Jack

I'm chatting with maynor and stephen and thats going good. but also Raffy is cool but imma try to put some false ideas about the cookie game on him 

Raffy

There was one hinky vote for me which tells me that people think I am push-y and a leader on this tribe which is not ok. I mean I want to win challenges, but I don't want to be seen as aggressive. However, I guess I cannot help it. I need to get into an alliance soon. Otherwise, I'll find myself not within a majority. I guess my social game isn't strong enough so I need to rely on my strategic game.

Keith John

Well, its been about three days since the game began, It's going okay for me. We won Immunity so game talk has been on the low. The time difference really screwed me over, I wasn't part of the latest immunity challenge discussion. Even though I wouldn't have contributed much in that convo, Having no input or talk during such moments puts me on the back foot (socially). The saving grace is that I was able to connect to four others through one on one convos. That has helped me built a sort of majority alliance, But as a thumb rule of survivor, unless we don't through a vote together. U cant trust anyone. Hopefully, it sticks and I am able to get through the first few votes. I don't know why but I keep getting a feeling that maybe John and Cormac are telling me what I wanna hear and make me feel comfortable. I hope that isn't true and the alliance is genuine. Cause I feel I really get along with them and can really work with them for a long time.  I think both of them are awesome. The only other person I trust is Zoe, we just connected quick. Sierra though in my alliance I haven't yet had a strong one on one conversation with her. let's see what's in store in the coming days 

Jack

Were planning to fuck with the other tribe by sending a spy to seed some accidental plan spillage. John’s a smart cookie. MaynorJay. I am slightly sad you split me and Timmy up. The cast reveal and seeing Timmy in that tribe i was like :0. But you did make it one world so i could still talk game with him 😊. Plus i missed being hosted by you. ❤️

John

this plan i concocted could either be really good or really bad. all we gotta do is throw the other side off their scent. but can we do it and make it believable? i guess we will find out tonight.

Ellie

Cookies is chaotic: more detail coming later

Jack

I took a risk for the idol hunt that might cost me my vote at the next tribal. I'm both regretting this decision and thinking it'll probably maybe be worth it...?

John

ok my plan dissolved like an alka seltzer. that’s fun. we love that. i just hope we win at this point. if we lose, that’s going to make things quite interesting.

Ellie

K so lack of communication has officially reached another level, this would be easier if people spoke???? Even Joseph did and he had finals!!!!! Some people have time to try to get on my good side and strategize but not to fucking talk about the challenge???? Some of yall👀👀

Sierra

Sitting out of this challenge was agonizing! I couldn’t be a part of any of the strategy talk for the challenge itself... so I had little to no clue what to expect as I watched. I really don’t want to go to Tribal Council, either. I’m hoping that we can pull out a win and I won’t have to stir the pot and potentially show my cards alliance-wise this early in the game.

Dylan C

I haven't been talking to people enough today and should probably do some of that. Well, I certainly will if we go to tribal but I'm hoping we don't

Jack

Cromac and I chatted for a bit and agreed on a sort of alliance, so that's a thing. Other than that I have fingers crossed for us winning this challenge!

Sierra

So we lost immunity, and I’m PISSED. We fully expected Keith to get 60 cookies from our tribe alone, but he only ended up with 55. That means that somebody on our tribe did not play into the tribe’s strategy. Now my butt could be on the line and I didn’t even have a chance to play in the immunity challenge! I feel relatively safe with my alliance, but anything could happen between now and tribal. Here’s hoping my five stick together!

Timmy

We won!! There was strategy used on the tribe but also people just tried to take control of what everyone else was doing. Like if they try to do that for the challenge they’ll try to do that for votes and that’s not how I’m trying to roll. It kind of sucks that the people I want to work with are on the other tribe. I want to message jack bc they seem chill based on the call last night after tribal. Also there is no way I’ll get an idol bc these slide puzzles are ridiculous.

Sierra

Right now it looks like the votes will be heading towards Stephen. I really like him and think he could be a good ally... but the numbers are against him right now, and that makes it difficult to save him. I don’t want to sink my game attempting to save his... so it looks like Stephen will be the first one voted off of our tribe. I’ll really miss having another literature lover on the tribe, and I’ll miss having some intercontinental diversity, but I’d rather save my own neck right now.

Maynor

So I am now in an alliance with Cormac, Zoe, Sierra, and John. And it is called Maynor’s lovers for some reason. But it now got changed to Maynor’s Angels. 👀 jay came to my host chat and was like ___ is shook. And i died as well. So far the target seems like it might be Stephen that was brought up by John. But we still have until tomorrow so who knows. As long as im safe that is all that matters.

John

hi. i’m john, i’m 20 years old, and i’m absolutely worried stephen has an idol. he just...doesn’t connect. and it puts me on edge. so i want the vote to be somewhat split. we need to put the majority of them on stephen, but have one or two of us worms put down someone else’s name just in case stephen pulls out an idol. no matter what, us 4 (me, cormac, sierra, and zoe) need to get through this vote so we have the majority.

Jack

WOW. Okay so Cormac and I a pretty tight rn. Plan is to vote either Maynor or Stephen. Cormac is closer with Zoe, who i haven'y heard from much. Sierra and I have had some banter with Sierra and opened up private channels with them. Imma check that they're good with Stephen or Maynor, and which they'd prefer. 

Jack

Sierra seems to want to keep Maynor around more than Stephen while I'm feeling the other way. I'm down with either so hopefully things work out.

Dylan C

https://cnet2.cbsistatic.com/img/tcQaSg5LL_0-HBuWFPxpguK71TM=/1092x0/2019/06/06/b11ccfac-685e-4cb2-a239-b09af07b1baf/toriflynn2.jpg

Jack

IDOLS EXSIST. And hopefully Stephen and maynor dont have any

Jack

I MADE A DUMB CRAZY PLAN. Like I said to the others it basically, we make a chat with Stephen, tell him heyyyyy lets vote Maynor, then go and actually vote Stephen. I feel a little bit evil but also i totally get the reason blindsides are so popular. I FEEL LIKE A SPY!

Dylan C

I love you, Jay

Jack

The trap has been set, hopefully Stephen falls for the it and nothing goes to shit. And also that Cormac's not pulling a con on me. I doubt he is but pArAnOiA.  

Jack

STEPHEN RESPONDED AND HE SEEMS DOWN WITH VOTING MAYNOR AND BELIEVES CORMAC AND ME AND I CHATTED WITH JOHN AND HES DOWN WITH VOTING STEPHEN BUT O MY GOD IM SO NERVOUS. sorry bout the caps lock, I feel like it was needed to covey my FEELiNGS

Jack

All the gears are locked in. Everyone's voting Stephen; Stephen seems to be on board with voting Maynor; Maynor will hopefully stick with going for Stephen; and Keith will maybe hopefully I hope go with what me and Cormac are going for. 

That started off so confident and turned into "Hm maybe I'm not sure I hope"

John

ok so here’s the tea sisters. our original target was stephen. he’s more reserved, kinda quiet, but he’s going after less active players (ironic, right), and apparently he is targeting keith. so if an idol is played, it might be him. so the worms are talking to jack and trying to get him to come on board for our plan. jack goes into complete paranoia mode between all of us, and we’re concerned he’s a flight risk. so the vote is shifting to jack. being erratic is more dangerous in this game than silence is.

John

lmao if this blindside on jack completely backfires and i go to EOE, i’d actually scream over how much work is going into it. this is so messy and complex for literally day 4 of this game that it perplexes me. it’s either gonna be 4/3/1 or 5/2/1, i’m not sure yet. but strap in folks, we’re experiencing turbulence. the plane may be going down.

Jack

Other than Keith everyone's locked in to vote for Stephen, even Maynor. Me and Stephen chatted and he complimented me saying that i don't seem like a new player cause I'm so comfortable in chat and I'm here like "hahahah yeah so weird not like in acting all calm and collected at you so you don't know I'm voting for you." I do feel a bit bad voting out Stephen now that I've got a better vibe on him, and I've been leaving little hints of "sorry for voting you out" and "hope you come back from the edge" at him, but doing them as me saying "Oh I feel so bad for voting out Maynor" so that I don't blow my cover but yeah. Here's all my guilt dude ^ 

Joseph Collins

We got an immunity win which was nice. Apparently Malarkey (Melrakki) played with some type of strategy. And Ulfur went coocoo for coco puffs and won. So I’m happy about that. Putting a plan in motion to get some threats out soon. Need a really good numbers advantage first. 

Zoe

GOD okay wow this is so much. We lost the immunity challenge, which is funny because I said that I was pretty confident we were going to win. I'm not concerned about being sent home, I'm almost positive Cormac would tell me if he knew, and I have good relationships with people in my tribe. And very good news: Well, after literally teaching myself how to do a slide puzzle, wrestling with the god-host herself over reference images and website dysfunctionality, I finally reached the end of the idol hunt and located a very beautiful advantage, which is to call a blind vote and then see what people vote even though nobody else can. I read it a few times and then facetimed with Cormac to tell him the good news, and we agreed we would keep it until swap or merge and use it to see where peoples' loyalties lie. We discussed all of our options, our relationships with different people, and who we want to keep close until later. I have a good relationship with Timmy and Maynor, and I think Dylan C as well, so that will come in handy when we swap and after the merge. We also solidified an alliance with us and Keith. FUCKING MEANWHILE, over in tribe Machievelli, the "oh, worm?" alliance has gone absolutely nuts strategizing over this vote. Jack has made everyone very paranoid by asking every person in the tribe who they were voting for. He had never messaged me individually before, and then just popped up and said he wanted to make sure I was voting for Stephen, which is who "oh, worm?" was originally going to vote for. I think it was Cormac who brought it up because Jack keeps info-dumping all of his thoughts onto him, but we all agreed to vote for Jack. Cormac and I discussed how to tell each person, one of those resulting in a final three deal with Keith, entitled "Zoe and the boys" as well as a yet to be titled final four alliance with me, Cormac, John, and Keith, yet to be named, that neither John nor Keith know about. Ultimately we said that we'd check back in in the morning and determine if anything had blown up overnight with Jack, since he seems to be very paranoid.

Jack

MWAHAHAAHHA Stephen believes out plan to vote maynoris genuine but it is a TRICK. Hope he doesn't hate me tho, seems like a nice guy. Those read receipts are just real sus being off man. but he tots believes me, Cormac, and Sierra.

Zoe

It's been more of a quiet morning, though we are all tense about what is going to happen at tribal. We don't think there is anything crazy happening with Jack, and ultimately we aren't telling Stephen about the plan in case he ends up telling a person he isn't supposed to. It should turn out to be a 6-1-1 vote, hopefully none of those going to me. I want to play a low key game here: I want to be making the decisions with Cormac, making tight alliances with other players, and then having them go out and do the dirty work. John seems like a good guy and a good player, and I also feel like he thinks he's the leader of our little group. It's definitely in our best interest to stay tight with him, but we have to be wary of him making alliances on the other side as well.

Maynor

I’m so fucken nervous and I swear if im voted out second. Ugh. Jack can go home. Like i did nothing to you and you just decide to come for me for no reason? Like wow. Jacks the target and I hope the people ive been talking to and aligned with are telling me the truth cuz it would totally suck if they are lying to me. There is really no reason to take me out who is active instead of jack who isnt active and just barely coming on. Fuuuuuuck me. Im be paranoid the whole fucken day arent I. 

Stephen

So this tribe is kinda dull, so theyve chosen a dull vote. Maynor. I like maynor but he has been a little silent. The big question is: is there a majority alliance out there? The answer is yes, of course there is, there always is. I make my survivor career on not being in majority alliance then tearing them apart when the tea gets spilled. See: Tashirojima.

Jack

Made a bit of a conection with Ellie from the other tribe, and she seems pretty open to working together if we make it to the merge or if theres a tibe swap

Raffy

I am happy that we do not have to go to tribal. It allows me to be more social with people on my tribe without the threat of a vote looming over our heads. 

Justin

This round was a lot more chill. Mostly cuz we won immunity, but I'm still keeping my relations with everyone good. I realized this round that Cormac, whom I have been talking to since last round, is on the other tribe lol. Luckily, I didn't tell him any compromising information, and now I have a connection to the other tribe. Plus, Keith from the other tribe reached out to me and we had a really good conversation. I like him a lot and I see myself working with him in a swap or merge. He is from Pakistan so he is also in the eastern hemisphere as well as Stephen. So, I was thinking I could possibly make an Old World alliance because we are closer to each other in times. However, Cormac has told me that his tribe is most likely voting out Stephen so that won't work out. I would say the only alliance I have so far is with Cormac, so I need to make something official with a player in my tribe before other people get them. Specifically, I want to ask Timmy to be in an alliance. 

Maynor

Today has been really quiet. I really hope the people telling me im good are telling the truth. I hope my connections are strong enough to let me survive this first round. Im so nervous and ugh i hate this feeling. Id be extremely sad if I go over an inactive. 

Raffy

Truly. Honestly. I'm so lazy. I don't want to do the idol hunt lmao

Jack

I can't remember if i already did a confessional about this but in case i didn't: Ellie and i chatted a bit and she seems open to working together later in the game and Cormac seems down with that plan too. Idk if i cant /trust/ Raffy but he also seems cool too

Ellie

So I feel like Raffy is a tiny bit annoyed with me sometimes cause I do share a lot, but I will not be a little tea pot this time. Raffy and I talk strategy all the time and he’s my closest ally but it honestly feels like I barely know him while my other close ally, Dylan, I have bonded with a lot and know a lot about them while still strategizing with them. It’s weird but I’m not going to push. He told me to stop talking about past games, and I’m like ? If I don’t mention you we’ll be chill

Ellie

Also we bonded with jack 👀

Maynor

Tonight, i may be leaving. Ill just be really sad. Mad at first cuz i tried my hardest in first immunity and then someone decides to mess up in the 2nd if by accident or on purpose. Mostly ill be sad cuz i wont be able to play with Timmy. I finally got to retalking with dylan and really miss them. Mostly ill be sad cuz let jay down for giving me a 3rd chance after my performance in rotuma. Ily Jay. Hopefully i stay. ❤️❤️❤️

Dylan C

I have to choose whether or not to do a part of the idol hunt where if I do it, I risk losing my vote at the next tribal I attend, and if I don't do it then I start the idol hunt over. Heck. I'll probably do it tbh.

Maynor messaged me a few minutes ago to say that he thinks he's getting voted out tonight, and that he enjoyed talking to me again. I don't want to see him go, in part bc I wanted to try to ally with him at some point and also just because I like him. Also I don't know what's going on on the other tribe but? Y'all are gonna vote out the guy who held a cup over his head for over two hours for your tribe? Smh

Jack

I really like Dylan C's vibe. Imma PM them later some more and see if that's a thing

Sierra

The vote switched when Jack started getting paranoid — his name wasn’t even coming up until he started asking everyone if they were SURE that they were down with the plan. It felt really awkward to have to reiterate over and over again that we were on his side... and it made it difficult to believe that HE was really with US. I’m really grateful that Stephen gets to stay around for another few days!

Dylan R

Ok so I did all of the puzzles for the idol hunt & then I FLOPPED on the challenge so: I have my clown outfit on. 

I’m trying to make friends but it’s hard 🥺 I think if we go to tribal Joseph will go before be but I got some serious catch up to do if I wanna win 

John

i know keith was originally our fifth, but i’m kinda wanting to work with maynor the more i talk to him. i want a fifth that will side with me if needed. and idk if keith could be that fifth that would benefit ME. it’s also just a thought. not tied to the idea yet. stay tuned kids.

cormac marek

Alrighty very eventful times leading up to our first tribal. I have been involved in like 13 alliance chats. Me and Zoe had an hour call last night on how she found an advantage to be kept between the two of us. It was amazing! Keith seems on board for anything. He has a "as long as its not me" gameplay. The core worm alliance was going to vote out Stephen but switched it to Jack after he became insane. It was sad because we were going to include Jack in on the deals. Maynor was told that Jack was gunning for him so that's a vote for Chaos Kass. If all goes smooth it will be unanimous. Stephen asked me right before tribal and I told him Jack was gunning for him and that majority was going for him. Hopefully this means he will be with us. It is really tricky. Let's see how the blood rolls

Joseph Collins

Patiently waiting on next immunityyyyyyy. 

Timmy

Jack is trying to get maynor out...so jack can go.

[hagiographically]

Could you talk more about Stanford stereotypes regarding literally anything (idk majors?) bc they way how you explain them is literally so funny/good

lmao aw ily, you can always come to me if u want my opinion related to anything stanford (stereotypes about dorms, sports teams, greek life, a cappella ??) because i have A Lot Of It - i only wish i was more integrated with the school cuz most of my opinions are hearsay instead of personal experience

major stereotypes….hmm thats hard cuz there are So Many majors but i can just go with the most common ones and group some together, etc

engineering:

aero/astro - small department full of space nerds, most of them are in SSI, drones, i personally consider them very brainy and if i were better at engineering i would be aero/astro cuz i think it’s the next frontier. there should definitely be more women in it for sure

bioe - my ex was bioe, they’re a bunch of nerds but they have good enough hearts. they care about curing diseases and shit

CS - oh boy. ohhhhhh boy. here we fuckin go. honestly CS is barely even a sterotype at stanford cuz its such a dominant culture…..the people who decide what stereotypes even are, are probably CS. it’s gotten to the point where if i meet someone and they aren’t CS it’s worth noting. it’s gotten to the point where, in my psych/literature/communications/education classes, i expect the other people to be CS. i have so many Opinions on CS Boys because CS Boys are such!!!!a!!!type!!!! (and different from just, a boy who does CS). they worship the trinity of google, facebook, and microsoft. their junior summer internship is at least one of these. they buy into all silicon valley startup culture and they love elon musk and talk about venture capital when its really not welcome. they love talking about how much work they have and how little they sleep. all INTJs. probably virgos. there is also a subgenre of CS boy who didnt come into stanford wanting to do CS and ended up switching because its easier to be a CS Boy at stanford. they criticize the culture all the time. to this you can say, “it’s all right, craig, i know you just want to make money.”

CME - people major in this when they dont love themselves

design - i personally think this major is fuckin cool and considered it before i realized physics was a pre-req. the d school is thought to be d for douchey though because their whole shtick is so ~ideate~ ~prototype~ ~We Are Quirky and Put Post-Its On Walls~ but i dug it as a frosh. they can be kinda condescending, but theyre by far the most interdisciplinary dept in the engineering major (although its also full of white men who think theyre hot shit cuz they can use photoshop)

EE - again for people who lack self love, its supposed to be so fuckin hard

MS&E - white frat boys who glorify jordan belfort

ME - similar to design. live at the PRL. stay up till ungodly hours carving wood. somehow this is enjoyable. also white male heavy

who knows how the f to categorize this:

education - if i could do stanford over i would major in this. usually very diverse, woke, often come from underprivileged backgrounds so they want to make it better for other people and reach communities that arent currently benefited (unlike silicon valley or wall street :) ) i respect them because they do what they love and not to make $ although if educational engineering were a thing im certain people would jump ship. it’s also not in the humanities dept so i feel like theyre Above the stanford hegemony and i love that

earthsys - i considered a minor in this. usually sweet, earth-friendly people. white but woke. possibly queer. granola loving hippies and maybe some frathletes who want an “easy” major but not sure (im not shitting on easy majors. i have one. love ‘em)

generally i like girls in any of the engineering depts because they are dealing with sexism and doing it. the boys are oftentimes extremely self-congratulatory and will usually say something dumb about the humanities. even the girls will hit you with the “oh i wish i could study that!” about any non-engineering discipline, and it’s implied that what they’re really saying is “but i care about my future too much!” 

humanities/sciences:

AAAS/chicanx studies/asian-american studies/CSRE - woke poc who use lots of buzzwords and say things like folx

art - the people who major in art are usually more quiet than you’d think. we have an Artsy Type at stanf that are kind of extra (theta chi/EBF types, also very woke QPOC) but i dont think theyre art majors for the most part. i barely know any actual art Majors. lots of engineers just do art on the side

bio - i love bio majors because they are sciency but also get shit on by engineers so we’re in solidarity. they are sweet and study all the time and just wanna make the world a better place. there’s also the pre-med kind of bio who i would hate if i were also pre med but since im not i just kind of admire and fear them

chem - i like chem people much more than i thought i would. again a very small major and they just live in lab and have varied non chem interests. this year i accidentally became friends with like 6 people from the chem fraternity and i was surprised how much i liked them

complit/english - i was this major! english in creative writing are usually chill, interesting people. complit and english in literature…….it’s a shakespeare circlejerk and they hit you with the Discourse. overly educated white people. avoid the boys specifically but the girls can also be incredibly self-satisfied. maybe 50/50. but if you take a creative writing class instead of a lit class, the CW kids are usually awesome

taps - our drama department. they’re nice, but extra and intimidating. (also stanford theater is…..okay….not really as good as they seem to think it is yikes that was mean but) however, like with english, take an introductory class and you’ll meet very cool non-taps majors.

econ - oftentimes wonderful people! outside of class that is

femgen - same people as the AAAS/CSRE crowd except whiter. queer girls with undercuts. upperclassmen are intimidating to many. everyone shares their opinion even when its not warranted. my honors is in this

film studies - this was almost my minor and if i werent CW i might have doubled in film and comm! i dont know any film majors but if they arent a cole sprouse im sure theyre fine (they are probably a cole sprouse)

german/italian/french/spanish language or studies - spot the person who studied abroad!

history - like english, can be cool, more likely pretentious

humbio - the other premeds! actually humbio gets shit on alllll the time for being easy or having a fluff major, bio majors think they’re soft. thus, i like them. their course catalog is awesome and its a huge major but all the scary pre meds are straight up bio and humbios are softer but in a good way its a lot of sweet girls

intl relations - one of my favorite majors. usually very down to earth, the best of the IR/poli-sci/pub-po trinity. however, they can also be self-congratulatory for being So Woke and also they love to educate you when You Didn’t Ask

linguistics - weird, diverse people. very small major. similar to anthro, my old major. i love small majors they always have cute dinners together

MCS - a hard fuckin major. not as “Look How Smart I Am” as a bad CS. mostly quiet and stay in and study their ass off

math - love to wax poetic about the beauty of math. fun when drunk. not when sober

philosophy/MTL/classics - avoid. classics can be okay if it overlaps with archaeology because theyre just a bunch of nerds and they get really excited and its cute. phil majors would rather just educate you about how free will is fake and youre like tim can you please just get out of the way we’re in the dining hall and you’re blocking the cornbread

physics - Avoid. they think all other sciences are lesser. women and POC are ok

poli-sci - hit or miss. generally pretty friendly. very talkative. fun to talk to about Not Politics

psych - the best major hehe. generally liberal and woke and often queer. however, non-psych people in psych classes can be a nightmare (unlike english, taps, etc) and problematic as fuck. also sometimes psych majors are extra (exhibit a: me)

pub policy - probably in student government. im biased against it, but go in with hesitation. student government is by and large not as effective as they seem to think (however, a “woke” person in pub po might be cool because they will campaign for sexual assault awareness and economic diversity and good stuff)

STS - ohhhhh man. probably the major that gets most shit on at stanford. i think engineers think it’s fake. (humbio, design, and STS get shit on the most i’d say, because they are interdisciplinary STEM majors, so engineers think that they’re for people who arent smart enough to do hard majors. whereas with english or IR, engineers know they couldnt do it because they havent written an essay since 2009, so they offer grudging respect) a frathlete major. i personally like it because i dig interdisciplinary shit, but i don’t dig frat boys or athletes so i avoid. some of their courses are great but it does seem kind of scrapped together as a major and i dont know how people outside of stan see it

sociology - a small major, seems cool. stigmatized but not by stanford because stanford students dont know it exists. “dont you mean psychology?” no

urban studies - skaters? who knows. i respect them tho. i think they care about….like….architecture? and city development? its a very niche thing and i feel like it’s pretty hip n happening

#stanford #stanford university #majors #college #advice #stereotypes #stan

[notcatherinemorland]

I have a number of absolutely stupid stories about myself (as is. fuckin evident) but one of my favourite ones is how I didn't actually understand the fate of the mc in the divergent series bc. I literally just didn't understand it. I read it and then just fucking didn't know. wild.

[[MORE]]

that was the one that played over in my head for a while and is my go-to anecdote for telling people I'm dyslexic (esp. if they knew me before assessment) because it's funny, relatable and it's understandible enough for them to 'get it' whilst I follow up with 'that, but every piece of text I read and on a much greater level.'

I've just been thinking on that a bit as I want to challenge my academic fate and retry for a literature degree.. because I read (and always have read) books in a fundamentally different way to like 80% of my peers. and I don't really know where to go with that. if I'm not bogging myself down in the semantics of syllables and specific word meanings (a pass time of mine, I enjoy it) then I'm looking at themes that might not even exist. hamlet - and I will die on this hill - is so much a study of personal and private behaviour, and what we choose to show to the world. and its also a story about how children forced to follow their parents lives and not their own are kinda doomed to unhappiness. this very easily turned into a hamlet post good god i love hamlet so much. I'm saying that because I stuck out like a sore thumb in literature class because a) I enjoyed the work lmao and b) I said a load of shit way out of left field because I think about this stuff over and over until I can verbalise it. so I spend a LOT of time thinking about that stuff.

I'm not saying all that because I think the way I read text is better or special. i dont think I'm a special snowflake that can understand literature correctly. (and if I come across like that ever, this is a formal apology, its unintentionally and I don't think like that.)

I just see a fundamental difference in the way I read books and the way my friends who don't have dyslexia or similar read books. I was talking with my friend about game of thrones and northern lights today. she's reading and reveling in all the plot details and the way it compares to the series (super interesting if u like got) and honestly I don't remember much of got. and I've read all but the last published one. I remember more about how I felt reading it and what kind of themes were explored in it than who did what where. and neither of those are bad readings, and one isn't inherently better than the other and this is also a Literature Friend who likes Shakespeare with me, and she's one that really enjoys game of thrones anyway. there's a lot of variables.

anyway that's where my brain went today.

#me meta #this got LONG i am so sorry #hamlet blogging #in minor